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Speaker 1: Well, I invited you here. I thought I made myself

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Speaker 1: perfectly clear. When you're a guest to my home, you

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Speaker 1: gotta come to me empty. And I said, no, guests,

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Speaker 1: your presences presents enough. I already had too much stuff,

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Speaker 1: So how do you dare to surbey me?

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Speaker 2: Welcome to? I said, no gifts. I'm Richard Wineger. I'm

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Speaker 2: glad you're here. Look, you could be you could be

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Speaker 2: doing anything right now. You could be listening to your

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Speaker 2: favorite song. You could be calling a loved one and reconnecting.

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Speaker 2: You could be learning something, and instead you're here, and

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Speaker 2: that's on you, and that's fine. We're going to try

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Speaker 2: to have a nice time, and I think we will

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Speaker 2: because our guest is fantastic. I'm so excited to have

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Speaker 2: him here. It's Chris Gethered. Chris. Welcome to. I said,

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Speaker 2: no gifts.

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Speaker 3: It's a joy to be here. Thank you for having me.

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Speaker 2: How are you?

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Speaker 3: I'm I would say I'm doing okay. In general, life

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Speaker 3: is good. I will tell you that I'm lucky enough

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Speaker 3: that I booked some work. But it is in Canada. Oh,

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Speaker 3: which means that even though I'm fully vaccinated, I'm five

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Speaker 3: days into a fourteen day quarantine where I'm not allowed

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Speaker 3: to leave a hotel room. So you've caught me as

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Speaker 3: I'm starting to lose my mind. But we're not totally

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Speaker 3: there yet, so that should be a really good I

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Speaker 3: feeling for audio. That's a really good combination. You could

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Speaker 3: push me over the edge right now if you chose to.

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Speaker 2: I would love to break you. I would love to

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Speaker 2: have just the moment that Chris is just fully shattered

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Speaker 2: on record.

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Speaker 3: Well, the world's been waiting for it, so maybe you'll

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Speaker 3: get this, Sclusy.

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Speaker 2: What part of Canada are you in?

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Speaker 3: I'm in Vancouver, which is a lovely city that I've

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Speaker 3: only been able to explore one other time. And I

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Speaker 3: can't tell you how frustrating it is. Frustrating it is

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Speaker 3: to know that I'm sitting in a pretty low level

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Speaker 3: hotel off the side of a highway here for fourteen days,

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Speaker 3: and then I'll work for two days and then I'll

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Speaker 3: fly directly home. So I hope it won't come off

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Speaker 3: like I'm complaining more than as a cry for help,

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Speaker 3: which this is really what this is.

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Speaker 2: No, I think that your current state of mind is

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Speaker 2: absolutely fair. You're in essentially solitary confinement.

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Speaker 3: A little bit of a purgatory, which I want to

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Speaker 3: just reiterate for anybody who maybe didn't hear it. I

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Speaker 3: have been fully vaccinated for six weeks, for six weeks so,

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Speaker 3: but I'm happy to play by the rules Canada.

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Speaker 2: And I will say, when Chris came on to the Zoom,

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Speaker 2: I thought, Chris's house is a little sad, right, he

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Speaker 2: looks like you said, this appears to be maybe a couch,

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Speaker 2: but also maybe a futon with you know, just a

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Speaker 2: piece of art behind you that means nothing to no one. Yes, yes,

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Speaker 2: And you've been there for five days?

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Speaker 3: You said five days. Yeah, this is day five.

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Speaker 2: So I've heard a little bit about this experience of

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Speaker 2: being quarantined when traveling to other countries, but I don't

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Speaker 2: think I've actually spoken to someone who's been through it personally.

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Speaker 2: Now I'm very curious what the actual rules are.

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Speaker 3: The rules are. You take a COVID test before you

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Speaker 3: go within seventy two hours of your flight. You bring

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Speaker 3: proof of your negative result. You present that to customs

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Speaker 3: in Canada or Immigration, whichever one it was. They then

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Speaker 3: check all your work papers. They send you to a

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Speaker 3: booth where you then take another test in the airport

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Speaker 3: they send you to a government certified hotel right next

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Speaker 3: to the airport, and once you get your negative results

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Speaker 3: from that, you're allowed to go quarantine. Enough. For most

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Speaker 3: people country Kenada, they live here, so that means you

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Speaker 3: can now go home and enjoy the rest of your

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Speaker 3: fourteen day quarantine at home. For me, it means you

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Speaker 3: can go to the Sandman Signature hotel on the side

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Speaker 3: of a highway in Langley, British Columbia and just ride

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Speaker 3: this bad boy out and every day you have to

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Speaker 3: check in on an app and report if you've had

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Speaker 3: any symptoms. And then a friend of mine who's one

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Speaker 3: floor above me, it's also here, who haven't seen I

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Speaker 3: texted her and said, can we really not just like

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Speaker 3: take a walk around the block? And she said, production

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Speaker 3: really told me not to mess around. And also I

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Speaker 3: got a call from the Canadian government today making sure

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Speaker 3: I was here. So now I just live in fear

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Speaker 3: that I'm going to go take a walk They're gonna

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Speaker 3: catch me.

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Speaker 2: That would be devastating.

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Speaker 3: They can apparently find you up to six hundred dollars.

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Speaker 3: I'll put you in jail for five years, is what

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Speaker 3: they tell you.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, Well it's worth the risk.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, hey, who else is going to play

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Speaker 3: the crazy janitor on Netflix's Space Force? Who else?

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Speaker 2: Food wise? What's happening? Are they like sliding a tray

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Speaker 2: under your door? How's that working?

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Speaker 3: I am so glad you asked, So glad you asked.

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Speaker 3: And it's almost going to sound like this, you're teeing

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Speaker 3: things up as if we discussed them previously. We hadn't.

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Speaker 3: If you don't mind me walking a little.

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Speaker 2: Bit, Oh, of course, I love this production.

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Speaker 3: Was nice enough to get me some groceries, and I'm

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Speaker 3: going to show you a couple of my favorite things

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Speaker 3: they got me, which are two bucket sized cans of

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Speaker 3: Pinto beans. Yah. Yeah. And my other favorite item they

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Speaker 3: got now I've since filled it out. I didn't instacart

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Speaker 3: order myself. But the other thing they got was a

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Speaker 3: where is it? Just give me one moment to find it.

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Speaker 2: Chris is going through a like a not a mini fridge,

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Speaker 2: but not a real.

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Speaker 3: They got me a block of mozzarella cheese larger than

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Speaker 3: my head.

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Speaker 2: No, I'm very sad looking mozzarella cheese. This is not

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Speaker 2: you know, this is a bottom of the barrel cheese.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. And then they did get me some veggie dogs

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Speaker 3: because I'm a vegetarian. And I tried them for the

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Speaker 3: first time yesterday, and they they got me a fifteen pack.

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Speaker 3: I think they thought I wanted to eat veggie dogs

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Speaker 3: every day that I was or veggie dogs. And I

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Speaker 3: can tell you again, I'm not one to complain about

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Speaker 3: other people's goodwill and kindness and free things. But they

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Speaker 3: were so gross that after two bites I threw them

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Speaker 3: all away.

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Speaker 2: Oh no, wait, do you just have beans and cheese?

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Speaker 3: No? I did an Instacart order, so I also have

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Speaker 3: some Reese's cereal. I have some, have some some. I've

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Speaker 3: got some stuff to live on that I can that

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Speaker 3: I can reckon with. But when I walked in and

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Speaker 3: just saw the pinto beans and the big brick of cheese,

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Speaker 3: I was and I was like, so hotel is not

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Speaker 3: It's not awful, but it's not nice. It's like a

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Speaker 3: really mid grade I said, Oh, to ride out a

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Speaker 3: couple of weeks here. I hope I don't go insane.

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Speaker 3: So I hope I'm not complaining too much. I hope

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Speaker 3: this is just a fascinating glimpse into the life that

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Speaker 3: I'm leading. How are you, How are you. Your your

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Speaker 3: house strikes me as very minimalist and cool and clean.

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Speaker 3: Get this is just.

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Speaker 2: Kind of the back office, and so there's not a

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Speaker 2: lot happening here. But I'm not going to I have

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Speaker 2: nothing to complain about. I have absolutely I mean, you're

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Speaker 2: currently the portrait of a man who has lost everything.

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Speaker 2: This is like someone who's wife left him with the kids,

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Speaker 2: he had cheated a business partner, as ejected from the company,

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Speaker 2: and is now just barely holding on. So I I

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Speaker 2: feel like a king in contrast right now. I don't

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Speaker 2: want to brag. I don't want to make you feel

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Speaker 2: worse about your current conditions.

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Speaker 3: I think it's fair.

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Speaker 2: You know, I had well, actually I had a protein

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Speaker 2: shake for lunch, so that's not exciting. What is my

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Speaker 2: life outside? I might as well be in a crappy

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Speaker 2: hotel room.

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Speaker 3: I do think it's fair. These hotel rooms that have

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Speaker 3: the little kitchen and like you said, the fridge that's

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Speaker 3: not a big fridge, but not a mini fridge, they

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Speaker 3: do strike me as the perfect place for someone who

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Speaker 3: has separated from his wife but hasn't landed in his

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Speaker 3: new living situation. Seems like the exact vibe you captured

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Speaker 3: the exact vibe with that description.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I feel like if a hotel room has a

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Speaker 2: kitchen and it's not like the most expensive hotel room

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Speaker 2: in the world, then it's the saddest place.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it adds. It does add a grim quality. I'm

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Speaker 3: not thrilled.

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Speaker 2: Do they have hey like kitchen equipment or do you

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Speaker 2: have pots and pans that kind of.

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Speaker 3: There's pots, there's pans, there's dishes, there's silverware, there's dishwashing,

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Speaker 3: soap in a brush. There is laundry. I have to

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Speaker 3: buy my own detergent. I'm currently running some laundry and

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Speaker 3: that's about it. That's about it, and otherwise it's just

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Speaker 3: got sort of I would say the vibe of a

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Speaker 3: hotel room that was built I would predict in the

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Speaker 3: early half of the nineteen nineties and feels it. That's

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Speaker 3: what I would say. I'm living a purgatory like existence.

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Speaker 2: You're someone who spends a decent amount of time on

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Speaker 2: the road, set true. Do you feel like you've been

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Speaker 2: in worse hotel rooms than this?

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Speaker 3: I absolutely have. I want to give credit to the

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Speaker 3: Sandman's signature because I named names. It's not a bad hotel.

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Speaker 3: I'm not saying it's a bad hotel. It's just not

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Speaker 3: a hotel you want to live in for weeks at

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Speaker 3: a time.

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Speaker 2: That's the one wants to be trapped a room with

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Speaker 2: no choice to leave.

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Speaker 3: And this is this ain't the four Seasons over here.

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Speaker 3: And I'm not even allowed to go use the gym

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Speaker 3: or the pool, so I'm just sitting in the room.

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Speaker 3: So it's not on the Sandman signature, lovely chain. I'm

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Speaker 3: sure good people with nothing but the best of intentions.

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Speaker 3: But yeah, I've been in hotel rooms significantly worse than this.

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Speaker 3: I once booked some rooms in San Francisco while I

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Speaker 3: was touring, and I had some other people with me

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Speaker 3: on the tour, so we booked a few rooms. We

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Speaker 3: got to the hotel and it was so shady, and

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Speaker 3: the guy was playing some weird game about money, and

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Speaker 3: it led to one of the guys on the tour

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Speaker 3: with me trying to fight the hotel manager. So I've

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Speaker 3: seen I've seen the worst of the worst, and then

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Speaker 3: I've been lucky enough that sometimes people pay for a

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Speaker 3: room for me where I see the real fancy side

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Speaker 3: of things. This is just straight down the middle. Nothing

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Speaker 3: here is going to blow you away and that's a

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Speaker 3: fine description for a hotel room. That's a hotel room

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Speaker 3: might be happy to stay in.

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Speaker 2: For a night, of course, three nights even just not

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Speaker 2: a third of my summer. Well, how was life before

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Speaker 2: you got there? I feel like it was probably opening up,

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Speaker 2: I am.

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Speaker 3: It is great. I live in New Jersey, where I

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Speaker 3: grew up. I moved back there to raise my son.

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Speaker 3: We've got a house in a neighborhood that I never

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Speaker 3: thought I'd be able to live in a place like this.

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Speaker 3: I've been so lucky and blessed in my life. There's

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Speaker 3: a lake that's not too far away, so we can

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Speaker 3: take my son swimming, and I get to see this

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Speaker 3: little two year old boy full of joy. Things are good.

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Speaker 3: New Jersey's been doing I think a very good job

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Speaker 3: on the vaccinations. I think about half of the adults

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Speaker 3: are vaccinated, so they're really letting us, They're letting the

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Speaker 3: freak flags fly again. And it's a beautiful life. And

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Speaker 3: I feel so lucky and blessed. And perhaps that is

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Speaker 3: part of why my current situation does feel like one

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Speaker 3: worth complaining about, even though at the end of the day,

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Speaker 3: like I said, I'm doing a cushy acting job for Netflix. Boohoo,

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Speaker 3: I get it.

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Speaker 2: I would love to be with you right now.

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Speaker 3: I'd love to be home with my two year old.

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Speaker 3: That's the point. But I also got to put food

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Speaker 3: on his plate and try to get that health insurance.

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Speaker 3: So maybe I'm just being the best dad I can

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Speaker 3: be right now.

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Speaker 2: Where are you living in New Jersey? Is that something

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Speaker 2: you can reveal.

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Speaker 3: I'm willing to say. I live in Morris County, New Jersey,

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Speaker 3: which is kind of further west than I think a

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Speaker 3: lot of the entertainment types go. Usually they'll land a

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Speaker 3: little about forty minutes closer, where you can have trains

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Speaker 3: and get in and out easy. I said, I'm pretty

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Speaker 3: burnt out, I'm pretty tired. I want to go live

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Speaker 3: in the woods. So we kind of live out in

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Speaker 3: the middle of nowhere. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. The time I've spent in New Jersey was in Lyndhurst,

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Speaker 2: which I believe is closer to New York.

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Speaker 3: It is. It's part of the meadow Lands, I believe.

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Speaker 3: As far as what were you doing in Lyndhurst, New Jersey?

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Speaker 2: This is not just trying to open a small business.

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Speaker 2: I opened a sandwich shop.

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Speaker 3: How did it go?

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Speaker 2: No, Well, it's close now. I was run out of town.

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Speaker 2: People knew immediately I wasn't from New Jersey and I

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Speaker 2: was just fourced out. No, my boyfriend's from Lindhurst, from Lindhurst.

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Speaker 2: His parents still live there. He has family in that area.

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Speaker 3: Well, Lindhurst, New Jersey is the home of one of

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Speaker 3: my favorite places in the world. It's famous for if

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Speaker 3: people If people in New Jersey have been to Lindhurst,

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Speaker 3: it's generally to eat at a restaurant slash spectacle known

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Speaker 3: as Medieval Times.

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Speaker 2: That's where Medieval Times is.

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Speaker 3: Your boyfriend is hiding this from you out of shame

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Speaker 3: because this is Lindhurst's overall reputation in New Jerseys. Oh,

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Speaker 3: that's where you can go eat in that castle and

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Speaker 3: watch Knight's fight and it's sort of a legendary. I

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Speaker 3: think it's a pretty legendary thing, and a lot of

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Speaker 3: us get brought there on like school trips in middle school.

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Speaker 2: Why how has he never said this to me?

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Speaker 3: He's hiding it? He doesn't shock Why would demanded we go? Yeah,

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Speaker 3: he does want you to know, because I have to

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Speaker 3: imagine people. I don't know too many people from Lindhurst,

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Speaker 3: if any. I have to imagine that lind Hurst. People

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Speaker 3: are incredibly tired of being constantly met with the reaction, oh,

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Speaker 3: where are you from? Windhurst? Yeh, Medieval Times. It's probably

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Speaker 3: been a bane of his existence for most of his childhood,

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Speaker 3: and he's happy to let it go.

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Speaker 2: Medieval Times to me, does not feel like a place

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Speaker 2: that should be in Lyndhurst. I mean, I've never been

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Speaker 2: to Medieval Times, but it feels like a place where

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Speaker 2: it should be near a theme park or something.

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Speaker 3: Yeah. Yeah, it's kind of just in the middle of

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Speaker 3: the marshland there, the meadowlands. It's just like a series

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Speaker 3: of swamps and marshes and you can go. You drive

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Speaker 3: big giant castle. They put on a show the knights

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Speaker 3: fight and kill each other. At one point they they

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Speaker 3: have someone who's trained in falconry come out and they

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Speaker 3: let a falcon loose and it flies around your head

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Speaker 3: while you're eating.

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Speaker 2: While you're eating, and.

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Speaker 3: They don't give you silverware, that's part of the gimmick.

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Speaker 3: You're just eating with your hands, like a medieval dirt pack.

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Speaker 3: And it's really it's pretty great.

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Speaker 2: How is the food at Medieval Times? I'm very curious

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Speaker 2: because it's very simple food that feels like you couldn't

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Speaker 2: screw it up. But I feel like if anyone's going

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Speaker 2: to screw it up, it's gonna be a place that

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Speaker 2: has essentially a rodeo happening in in front of you.

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Speaker 3: I think the last time I went was about three

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Speaker 3: years ago, and it was it's about the show, what

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Speaker 3: you're paying for. I mean, they got to groom these horses,

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Speaker 3: they got to train these people in stage combat. You're

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Speaker 3: paying for the show. You're not paying for the food.

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Speaker 3: The food's serviceable, though the food is better food wise

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Speaker 3: than this hotel is hotel wise. I do know that

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Speaker 3: we were all seated in a section cheering for a night,

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Speaker 3: and it was me and about thirty of my friends

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Speaker 3: all went together and we were cheering on our night,

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Speaker 3: and then the storyline took a really misogynistic turn where

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Speaker 3: our night was really being not cool to the princess,

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Speaker 3: and then we all retroactively felt really bad that we

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Speaker 3: were cheering this. Uh, this brutal misogynist but it is

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Speaker 3: what it is, right, I've.

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Speaker 2: Got to experience this at some point. I mean, I

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Speaker 2: feel like, well, maybe I don't know what medieval times

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Speaker 2: financial situation is, but I can't imagine they're doing great.

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Speaker 2: I just feel like especially.

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Speaker 3: Ever they've been around, since they've been around, I think

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Speaker 3: over thirty years if I'm remembering the first time I went,

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Speaker 3: And uh, I don't know how. I don't know how.

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Speaker 3: You're right, but yeah, they're they've been in business for

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Speaker 3: decades and I hope they don't close.

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Speaker 2: They're kind of like arena sized places, Am I wrong?

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Speaker 4: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: It has an indoor arena. I mean there are actual

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Speaker 3: jousting matches on horseback. You need some room to do that.

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Speaker 2: So that's got to I mean, the rent there has

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Speaker 2: got to be crazy.

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Speaker 3: It ain't Crey. And then these North Jersey taxes too.

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Speaker 3: I mean, this is not a small investment. This is

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Speaker 3: not a small investment. And I wish I could be

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Speaker 3: a fly on the wall when you say to your boyfriend,

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Speaker 3: how did you never tell me that interest is where

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Speaker 3: medieval Times is? Because I would I would be able

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Speaker 3: to study all the micro expressions in that.

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Speaker 2: That's what I'm going to find out, that he was

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Speaker 2: secretly working there, that he has a long resume at

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Speaker 2: in medieval times.

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Speaker 3: Can you imagine? It's like I used to have long

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Speaker 3: flowing hair and I was the squire to the Red

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Speaker 3: and Yellow Night.

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Speaker 2: Speaking of other absurd things in New Jersey, I read

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Speaker 2: about that enormous mall that they're still trying to create.

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Speaker 2: Are you familiar with this?

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Speaker 3: Not far from Lyndhurst also in Thelands. It's right next

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Speaker 3: to Giants Stadium, which is oh okay, no East Rutherford.

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Speaker 3: Those towns i'll bump up against each other. But yeah,

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Speaker 3: that mall has been sitting out there again, I think

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Speaker 3: close to two decades where it keeps They keep saying

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Speaker 3: it's about to open. Oh no, it's changing owners and

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Speaker 3: from what I hear, it either just opened or it

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Speaker 3: really is going to open. And the only thing I

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Speaker 3: know about it is they apparently have an indoor ski

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Speaker 3: jump you can use. And I feel like I am

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Speaker 3: bound to go.

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Speaker 2: It's like something you would really actually want to try.

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Speaker 3: I want to see what's going on in that mall

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Speaker 3: after all these years. And it looks I don't know

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Speaker 3: if you've driven past it in your times in Linders,

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Speaker 3: but it looks bizarre from the outside.

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Speaker 2: What does it look like?

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Speaker 3: It's not. It's not like you're driving past the mall.

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Speaker 3: Where you go, there's the Macy's, there's the lard and Tailor,

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Speaker 3: there's this years. It's kind of this big multiicolored trapezoid

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Speaker 3: in the sky. What multicolored trapezoid in the sky is

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Speaker 3: what I said?

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Speaker 2: Oh, I heard you very clearly. I'm just trying to

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Speaker 2: even imagine what that could possibly look like physically. That's

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Speaker 2: I mean, what so it's I mean, you know the

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Speaker 2: standard mall is just several rectangles sewn together.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, no, this is this is not a from

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Speaker 3: Root three. From my vantage point, having only driven past

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Speaker 3: it on Root three, it seems to be an oddly

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Speaker 3: shaped building that is elevated. I don't know if when

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Speaker 3: you get up closer it's different than that, but the

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Speaker 3: section I can see from Route three, anybody out there

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Speaker 3: who's driven past it I think can fatch me. You

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Speaker 3: might have a different description for it. Maybe you wouldn't

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Speaker 3: say multi colored trap is all in the sky, But

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Speaker 3: you're not going to sit there and go it's just

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Speaker 3: a regular mall. Get dude, you're exaggerating. It's not a

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Speaker 3: regular mall.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. I usually I have only ever gotten to Lyndhurst

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Speaker 2: by train, so this may have limited my exposure to

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Speaker 2: some of these things.

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Speaker 3: I as you can imagine growing up in New Jersey

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Speaker 3: and doing comedy in New York. I started when I

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00:19:29,920 --> 00:19:31,600
Speaker 3: was still a college student, so I would take the

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Speaker 3: train in all the time, and it cuts right through

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Speaker 3: the Metal Lands there, and for any sports fans might know,

385
00:19:37,640 --> 00:19:39,640
Speaker 3: the Metal Lends as the Sports Complex, but it's named

386
00:19:39,680 --> 00:19:42,479
Speaker 3: after this large geographic area that's just largely like a

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Speaker 3: swamp with a lot of wildlife growing in it. And

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Speaker 3: I was once making my way back from New York

389
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Speaker 3: City to New Brunswick, New Jersey, and there were severe

390
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Speaker 3: delays on the train and they finally let us on,

391
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Speaker 3: and it was the middle of the night at that point,

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Speaker 3: and it turned out the Metal Leans had caught on

393
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Speaker 3: fire and the O they had just put it out

394
00:20:01,280 --> 00:20:03,000
Speaker 3: and sent us through. So in the middle of the

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Speaker 3: night we drove through like a smoldering, smoking, glowing red

396
00:20:10,080 --> 00:20:13,600
Speaker 3: actually incredible, Yeah, it was. It really was like taking

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Speaker 3: a train trip through hell. It really was good grip.

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Speaker 2: My only exposure, and I say this probably every time

399
00:20:23,080 --> 00:20:26,320
Speaker 2: we go through the Meadow Lens and Sea Caucus to

400
00:20:26,480 --> 00:20:28,399
Speaker 2: either of those things. Is are you familiar with the

401
00:20:28,440 --> 00:20:32,399
Speaker 2: band the Wrens. I am that I wasn't aware. They

402
00:20:32,440 --> 00:20:35,600
Speaker 2: have albums named after various things in New Jersey. And

403
00:20:35,640 --> 00:20:37,960
Speaker 2: so that I mentioned that to my boyfriend every time

404
00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:40,840
Speaker 2: we go and he has no idea what I'm talking about,

405
00:20:40,880 --> 00:20:43,560
Speaker 2: and it's a very boring, uh piece of trivia for him,

406
00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:45,359
Speaker 2: but it's very exciting for me personally.

407
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Speaker 3: You have you have to insist then on your next

408
00:20:49,280 --> 00:20:52,679
Speaker 3: visit to Lindhurst you go to medieval times, because he

409
00:20:52,720 --> 00:20:55,959
Speaker 3: will hate that. I am saying this. It is the

410
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Speaker 3: cultural contribution to New Jersey that Lindhurst has offered up.

411
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Speaker 3: And is that miserable? I'm sure as a Linearus native,

412
00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:06,440
Speaker 3: I'm sure that that's not something you want to hear.

413
00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:08,960
Speaker 3: But as far as the rest of New Jersey can tell,

414
00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:11,720
Speaker 3: that's the gift they gave us. You have to talk

415
00:21:11,720 --> 00:21:15,000
Speaker 3: about this. I actually feel concerned a little bit that

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00:21:15,080 --> 00:21:16,919
Speaker 3: it hasn't been brought up, because it has to be

417
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Speaker 3: a piece of identity and experience.

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Speaker 2: This feels like it's already eroding the trust in my relationship.

419
00:21:22,840 --> 00:21:24,800
Speaker 3: I'm not trying to fan any flames on that, but

420
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Speaker 3: I'd be worried there are fissures happening as we speak.

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Speaker 2: This is going to lead to the end of the relationship.

422
00:21:31,600 --> 00:21:33,760
Speaker 2: I can feel it in my bones, and you know

423
00:21:34,280 --> 00:21:38,600
Speaker 2: that's completely his fault. I was lied to, things were

424
00:21:38,640 --> 00:21:42,120
Speaker 2: kept from me, and it's hard. It's hard to move

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Speaker 2: forward in a relationship when trust has been shattered.

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Speaker 5: So if your theory that he worked there as a

427
00:21:48,680 --> 00:21:52,200
Speaker 5: youth came true, I feel like it would be one

428
00:21:52,240 --> 00:22:01,280
Speaker 5: of the happiest contributions to someone's life from Afar that

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00:22:01,359 --> 00:22:03,160
Speaker 5: I've ever offered of truly.

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Speaker 2: Well, speaking of, you know, gifts people have been given,

431
00:22:12,040 --> 00:22:16,159
Speaker 2: the verses, given this to the world, or medieval times

432
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Speaker 2: to New Jersey. Look, we decided you were going to

433
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Speaker 2: be on this podcast a few weeks ago, and I

434
00:22:22,720 --> 00:22:26,480
Speaker 2: was very excited about it. And I thought, Chris is

435
00:22:26,520 --> 00:22:29,879
Speaker 2: on the East Coast, will be able to connect by zoom.

436
00:22:30,359 --> 00:22:33,960
Speaker 2: You will be a safe, easy conversation and then we'll

437
00:22:34,000 --> 00:22:39,040
Speaker 2: move forward. Now, the other night, there was a knock

438
00:22:39,040 --> 00:22:42,400
Speaker 2: at my door and I was greeted by a woman

439
00:22:42,480 --> 00:22:49,640
Speaker 2: named Natalie. She was holding a white bag. She said,

440
00:22:49,640 --> 00:22:53,840
Speaker 2: this is a gift from Chris, and you know, immediately

441
00:22:53,960 --> 00:22:57,120
Speaker 2: my brain started to spin. I started to wonder, what's happening.

442
00:22:57,560 --> 00:22:59,520
Speaker 2: Chris has agreed to be on a podcast called I said,

443
00:22:59,560 --> 00:23:02,439
Speaker 2: no gift, and here we are. So I'm just going

444
00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:04,800
Speaker 2: to confront you on the podcast. I hope this doesn't

445
00:23:04,920 --> 00:23:07,240
Speaker 2: Maybe this is the moment when you snap, but I

446
00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:10,119
Speaker 2: would like to just know is this a gift for me?

447
00:23:11,080 --> 00:23:13,480
Speaker 3: It is a gift, and I hate to put you

448
00:23:13,880 --> 00:23:17,719
Speaker 3: in an uncomfortable position, but I did go back on

449
00:23:17,760 --> 00:23:19,760
Speaker 3: the podcast and see how it has worked out in

450
00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:22,399
Speaker 3: the past, and it seems to me like if someone

451
00:23:22,440 --> 00:23:24,240
Speaker 3: like Coli Scola is going to offer up a gift,

452
00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:28,760
Speaker 3: I'm not going to be upstaged. So you have a

453
00:23:28,840 --> 00:23:31,480
Speaker 3: very impressive guest list, and it seems to me like

454
00:23:31,520 --> 00:23:33,320
Speaker 3: many of them have brought gifts and the last thing

455
00:23:33,320 --> 00:23:38,000
Speaker 3: I'm going to do is be outshined by Cola Scola,

456
00:23:38,119 --> 00:23:40,359
Speaker 3: who already outshines me comedically in every way.

457
00:23:40,600 --> 00:23:43,159
Speaker 2: Well, I'm going to step in and, uh, you know,

458
00:23:43,520 --> 00:23:46,119
Speaker 2: the rivalry between you and Cole has got to end

459
00:23:46,119 --> 00:23:49,080
Speaker 2: at some point. Yeah, And as someone who does not

460
00:23:49,240 --> 00:23:52,280
Speaker 2: live on the East Coast or New York, I'm going

461
00:23:52,320 --> 00:23:55,840
Speaker 2: to crown myself the king of New York comedy and

462
00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:57,400
Speaker 2: just settle this once and for all.

463
00:23:58,280 --> 00:23:58,720
Speaker 3: Yeah.

464
00:23:58,800 --> 00:24:00,680
Speaker 2: I feel like this is only fair to you and Cole,

465
00:24:01,280 --> 00:24:04,480
Speaker 2: and then you two can give up your careers finally

466
00:24:05,000 --> 00:24:07,080
Speaker 2: move on to I was something else.

467
00:24:07,240 --> 00:24:11,119
Speaker 3: I actually love that. I've been thinking a lot about that.

468
00:24:11,560 --> 00:24:14,240
Speaker 3: So thank you for that gift. And then you'll just

469
00:24:14,320 --> 00:24:17,439
Speaker 3: rule New York comedy as a sovereign from afar, like

470
00:24:17,520 --> 00:24:22,000
Speaker 3: Queen Elizabeth's relationship with Like the Weird, like the handful

471
00:24:22,040 --> 00:24:25,480
Speaker 3: of islands that the English still claim as.

472
00:24:25,320 --> 00:24:30,399
Speaker 2: Their empire, and Queen Elizabeth still holding it down. She

473
00:24:30,480 --> 00:24:32,840
Speaker 2: doesn't have much else to live for at this point.

474
00:24:33,320 --> 00:24:36,320
Speaker 2: Why not hold these, you know, kind of stolen properties.

475
00:24:36,480 --> 00:24:38,800
Speaker 3: The common New York is your commonwealth.

476
00:24:39,359 --> 00:24:42,359
Speaker 2: Yes, absolutely, and I'm going to use this to just

477
00:24:42,400 --> 00:24:46,200
Speaker 2: continue to build my empire. Eventually there will be the

478
00:24:46,240 --> 00:24:49,440
Speaker 2: sun will never set on the bridge or empire. That's

479
00:24:49,440 --> 00:24:50,320
Speaker 2: what people will say.

480
00:24:50,440 --> 00:24:57,400
Speaker 3: Now, if you need a castle, maybe maybe your boyfriend

481
00:24:57,440 --> 00:25:01,320
Speaker 3: wants to head back home to live long term. Someday

482
00:25:01,320 --> 00:25:03,560
Speaker 3: there's a castle for you to take and rule from.

483
00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:07,960
Speaker 3: Take my throat right there off the highway.

484
00:25:13,320 --> 00:25:16,400
Speaker 2: Well, look, I'm going to pick up the bag. It's

485
00:25:16,400 --> 00:25:17,200
Speaker 2: a white bag.

486
00:25:17,520 --> 00:25:18,879
Speaker 3: So have you opened it yet?

487
00:25:19,040 --> 00:25:19,560
Speaker 2: I haven't?

488
00:25:19,840 --> 00:25:20,040
Speaker 3: You know?

489
00:25:20,119 --> 00:25:23,960
Speaker 2: This is to this day, I'm very proud of myself.

490
00:25:24,560 --> 00:25:27,399
Speaker 2: As far as I know, I have not peaked at

491
00:25:27,440 --> 00:25:31,159
Speaker 2: a gift. And now there's probably some episode where I

492
00:25:31,200 --> 00:25:33,840
Speaker 2: reveal I peaked a gift, but as far as my memories,

493
00:25:34,000 --> 00:25:37,440
Speaker 2: as memory serves, I've never actually looked I like a surprise.

494
00:25:37,560 --> 00:25:40,679
Speaker 2: And it really is a testament to my strength as

495
00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:43,560
Speaker 2: a host that I've never opened a gift. I will

496
00:25:43,560 --> 00:25:47,440
Speaker 2: say this gift, I think it may be because it's

497
00:25:47,480 --> 00:25:50,440
Speaker 2: in a white paper, and you know, it's a little

498
00:25:50,720 --> 00:25:53,840
Speaker 2: it feels like if I were to guess, and obviously,

499
00:25:53,920 --> 00:25:56,240
Speaker 2: well who's to say, it feels like about a pound

500
00:25:56,240 --> 00:25:58,720
Speaker 2: of turkey to me, pound of Deli meat. I think

501
00:25:58,760 --> 00:26:01,720
Speaker 2: the white paper makes me think of deli meat, and

502
00:26:01,840 --> 00:26:05,399
Speaker 2: so that's what I'm thinking. Uh, if I open it

503
00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:07,960
Speaker 2: and it's just rotting Deli meat, We'll just have I mean,

504
00:26:07,960 --> 00:26:08,679
Speaker 2: we'll just have to.

505
00:26:09,080 --> 00:26:11,800
Speaker 3: I would be discussed that I would be gift. I'm

506
00:26:11,800 --> 00:26:14,760
Speaker 3: going to tell you right now there is a crucial,

507
00:26:15,040 --> 00:26:17,760
Speaker 3: crucial piece of information that I wish Natalie had given you,

508
00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:21,240
Speaker 3: maybe some instructions surrounding this gift. And Natalie, if you

509
00:26:21,280 --> 00:26:23,439
Speaker 3: are listening to this, I'm going to give you a

510
00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:27,320
Speaker 3: phone call that's going to crush your spirit. Anyway, we

511
00:26:27,359 --> 00:26:28,399
Speaker 3: can continue.

512
00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:33,199
Speaker 2: Anyone listening, There's a woman named Natalie who needs a

513
00:26:33,320 --> 00:26:39,800
Speaker 2: job she's recently unemployed and she's desperate for work. She's

514
00:26:40,119 --> 00:26:42,800
Speaker 2: got a lot of experience working for kind of a

515
00:26:42,880 --> 00:26:50,040
Speaker 2: demanding diva, so you keep that in mind when hiring her,

516
00:26:50,320 --> 00:26:50,800
Speaker 2: and if.

517
00:26:50,680 --> 00:26:53,320
Speaker 3: You need any sort of references, feel free to call me,

518
00:26:53,400 --> 00:26:55,520
Speaker 3: and I promise you I'll tell you the truth.

519
00:26:57,800 --> 00:27:08,879
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm going to dive in here and let's happen. Crinkling, crinkle, crinkle. Okay,

520
00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:13,080
Speaker 2: we're and I'm feeling okay. So I'm feeling like a

521
00:27:13,119 --> 00:27:15,119
Speaker 2: bottle through some tissue, is what I'm feeling.

522
00:27:15,440 --> 00:27:23,760
Speaker 3: Yes, that's what I told you. Yes, yack, milk. It

523
00:27:23,840 --> 00:27:25,520
Speaker 3: is the milk of a Himalayan animal.

524
00:27:26,840 --> 00:27:26,919
Speaker 4: What.

525
00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:32,920
Speaker 2: Okay? What I've opened here is something called mister Q Cucumber,

526
00:27:33,359 --> 00:27:35,879
Speaker 2: which is a This is so bizarre to me. I

527
00:27:35,920 --> 00:27:39,520
Speaker 2: don't know whether this came to me in a dream

528
00:27:39,640 --> 00:27:43,600
Speaker 2: or what it's a. This has a sparkly cucumber beverage.

529
00:27:43,640 --> 00:27:46,119
Speaker 2: But just recently, I don't know if this is just

530
00:27:46,160 --> 00:27:49,280
Speaker 2: my brain like like a circuit has snapped and I

531
00:27:49,359 --> 00:27:51,639
Speaker 2: just think I'm having DejaVu, But I feel like I

532
00:27:51,720 --> 00:27:55,840
Speaker 2: was recently thinking about cucumber flavored drinks, which I've never

533
00:27:55,920 --> 00:28:00,960
Speaker 2: had before. And this is, uh, what what's your feeling

534
00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:01,679
Speaker 2: on da jafu.

535
00:28:02,400 --> 00:28:04,800
Speaker 3: I've had it before, so I'm a believer.

536
00:28:05,440 --> 00:28:07,000
Speaker 2: Or do you think it's the sort of thing that

537
00:28:07,040 --> 00:28:09,800
Speaker 2: I'm now thinking like, Oh, the circus just kind of

538
00:28:09,800 --> 00:28:11,840
Speaker 2: snapped and made me think I had this memory.

539
00:28:12,840 --> 00:28:15,399
Speaker 3: I think that's possible. I haven't studied the science on it,

540
00:28:15,440 --> 00:28:18,160
Speaker 3: but I wish you had. I'd love to break down

541
00:28:18,200 --> 00:28:20,040
Speaker 3: some of these medical journals and see where we're at

542
00:28:20,040 --> 00:28:25,080
Speaker 3: our research. Love to know, got to keep these scientists

543
00:28:25,119 --> 00:28:26,680
Speaker 3: on the ball, you know, for.

544
00:28:26,720 --> 00:28:29,159
Speaker 2: Sake of the podcast, let's just say that this is

545
00:28:29,200 --> 00:28:33,640
Speaker 2: some sort of magical some you know, mystical forces were

546
00:28:33,720 --> 00:28:40,360
Speaker 2: at work and I kind of predicted this. I want

547
00:28:40,360 --> 00:28:42,640
Speaker 2: to hear why you've given me a mister cucumber d.

548
00:28:42,840 --> 00:28:45,880
Speaker 3: I love how stymied you are and talking about this.

549
00:28:46,600 --> 00:28:51,200
Speaker 3: I wish it was cold. I will tell you I am.

550
00:28:51,840 --> 00:28:55,280
Speaker 3: I've managed to tamp down the obsession a little bit

551
00:28:55,280 --> 00:28:57,760
Speaker 3: because it was getting unhealthy. But I am a soda fanatic.

552
00:28:58,320 --> 00:29:01,120
Speaker 3: Oh there was a stretch of my life where I

553
00:29:01,120 --> 00:29:04,040
Speaker 3: would argue I probably had one of the better collections

554
00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:09,240
Speaker 3: of soda you could find. I really enjoy small run

555
00:29:09,360 --> 00:29:13,200
Speaker 3: regionally bottled sodas. I enjoy the history. I'm a real

556
00:29:13,240 --> 00:29:16,720
Speaker 3: nerd for American history, and I think SODA's very often

557
00:29:16,720 --> 00:29:18,800
Speaker 3: If you look at the history of Coca Cola, for example,

558
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:21,680
Speaker 3: it really kind of echoes the times over and over again.

559
00:29:21,720 --> 00:29:25,000
Speaker 3: And then there's all sorts of stories about like corporate

560
00:29:25,120 --> 00:29:29,040
Speaker 3: mergers that I think you know, and small bottlers getting

561
00:29:29,120 --> 00:29:31,000
Speaker 3: stamped out by biger brands that kind of tell the

562
00:29:31,040 --> 00:29:34,160
Speaker 3: story of capitalism. There's a lot to it. For me.

563
00:29:34,840 --> 00:29:38,240
Speaker 3: I love sodas. There's certain sodas that when I find them,

564
00:29:38,680 --> 00:29:40,840
Speaker 3: I grab them because they're very rare and they're near

565
00:29:40,840 --> 00:29:42,320
Speaker 3: and dear to my heart. And I can tell you

566
00:29:42,800 --> 00:29:46,480
Speaker 3: definitively that I'm so jealous of what you're holding right now,

567
00:29:46,520 --> 00:29:49,760
Speaker 3: because mister Cucumber's very, very hard to find in most

568
00:29:49,760 --> 00:29:52,920
Speaker 3: stayers of the country, including mine. Yes, and I have

569
00:29:53,080 --> 00:29:57,240
Speaker 3: told many people that I regard this as a soda enthusiast,

570
00:29:57,320 --> 00:29:59,880
Speaker 3: and I don't drink alcohol. That's probably part of why

571
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:04,440
Speaker 3: I replaced my addiction with soda, and I can handle that.

572
00:30:05,720 --> 00:30:08,840
Speaker 3: I have told many people that what you are holding

573
00:30:09,000 --> 00:30:12,800
Speaker 3: in your hands right now is the king of drinks.

574
00:30:13,120 --> 00:30:15,960
Speaker 3: Is the reason in my opinion, you're not going to

575
00:30:16,000 --> 00:30:18,560
Speaker 3: find a better drink than mister Cucumber. And I know

576
00:30:18,640 --> 00:30:19,840
Speaker 3: I'm hyping it up to a point.

577
00:30:19,720 --> 00:30:23,040
Speaker 2: Where you're just absolutely setting it up for to be

578
00:30:23,040 --> 00:30:24,000
Speaker 2: the worst thing I've ever There.

579
00:30:23,960 --> 00:30:26,360
Speaker 3: Is not it won't be the worst thing, but you're

580
00:30:26,480 --> 00:30:28,000
Speaker 3: you're not You're going to go this is not the

581
00:30:28,040 --> 00:30:31,360
Speaker 3: best drink I've ever had, But I, in my opinion,

582
00:30:32,200 --> 00:30:35,000
Speaker 3: stand by it, and at the very least, I think

583
00:30:35,040 --> 00:30:38,680
Speaker 3: you'll be pleasantly surprised and you might lose your mind

584
00:30:38,760 --> 00:30:40,080
Speaker 3: like I did the first time I had.

585
00:30:40,680 --> 00:30:44,040
Speaker 2: Now, when did mister do you call it mister cucumber

586
00:30:44,080 --> 00:30:45,240
Speaker 2: or mister Q cucumber?

587
00:30:46,040 --> 00:30:50,400
Speaker 3: Mister cucumber. Yeah, but it's spelled mister m r Space

588
00:30:50,800 --> 00:30:52,320
Speaker 3: Q space cumber.

589
00:30:52,360 --> 00:30:56,160
Speaker 2: And also, oh it is, I yes, it actually is.

590
00:30:56,200 --> 00:30:58,360
Speaker 2: I've just been misreading the bottle this entire time.

591
00:30:58,360 --> 00:31:00,800
Speaker 3: Well, you're also holding something I'm even more jealous of,

592
00:31:00,840 --> 00:31:04,719
Speaker 3: which is the place where I had that procured is

593
00:31:05,160 --> 00:31:08,760
Speaker 3: a place that's kind of very infamous among soda collectors.

594
00:31:09,200 --> 00:31:13,080
Speaker 3: It's a supermarket named Galcos that's in It's.

595
00:31:12,960 --> 00:31:13,600
Speaker 2: In Highland Park.

596
00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:16,080
Speaker 3: Highland Park. I've been there, Oh you have, so you

597
00:31:16,200 --> 00:31:20,320
Speaker 3: know this is the soda supermarket. Yes, it's stocked. The

598
00:31:20,320 --> 00:31:22,840
Speaker 3: shells are stock. Ninety percent of the shells are just soda.

599
00:31:22,880 --> 00:31:27,440
Speaker 3: It's I have to say, for someone who sometimes has

600
00:31:27,520 --> 00:31:29,640
Speaker 3: work in Los Angeles and has a lot of friends

601
00:31:29,680 --> 00:31:32,840
Speaker 3: who live there. Now, the thing I get most excited

602
00:31:32,880 --> 00:31:35,560
Speaker 3: about when I visit Los Angeles is the opportunity to

603
00:31:35,600 --> 00:31:37,840
Speaker 3: visit Galcos because it's it's kind of I would say,

604
00:31:37,880 --> 00:31:42,280
Speaker 3: like the the place that sets the bar for soda

605
00:31:42,320 --> 00:31:47,760
Speaker 3: collectors worldwide. And the bottle you have that size and

606
00:31:47,880 --> 00:31:51,280
Speaker 3: shape of bottle of mister Cuyhummer. Galcos is the only

607
00:31:51,320 --> 00:31:53,360
Speaker 3: place I've ever seen any place else you can buy

608
00:31:53,400 --> 00:31:57,040
Speaker 3: it's a much smaller, sort of more normal shaped bottle.

609
00:31:57,240 --> 00:31:59,480
Speaker 2: A smaller This is a I feel like, this is

610
00:31:59,520 --> 00:32:03,800
Speaker 2: a nice moderately sized bottle. What the smaller bottle is

611
00:32:03,840 --> 00:32:07,480
Speaker 2: like an airline liquor bottle.

612
00:32:07,720 --> 00:32:11,520
Speaker 3: It's it is. It's larger than an airline liquor bottle

613
00:32:11,560 --> 00:32:16,000
Speaker 3: and smaller than like a regular bottled soda you'd find.

614
00:32:16,080 --> 00:32:20,080
Speaker 3: It's it's probably close to like the Stuart's line of soda.

615
00:32:20,080 --> 00:32:22,440
Speaker 3: If you know that sized bottle listeners out there. It

616
00:32:22,480 --> 00:32:25,120
Speaker 3: was slightly smaller than that. I'd say, you have that

617
00:32:25,400 --> 00:32:30,200
Speaker 3: sort of large, more tear drop shaped bottle, and I'm

618
00:32:30,280 --> 00:32:30,920
Speaker 3: jellous of that.

619
00:32:31,480 --> 00:32:33,280
Speaker 2: Now should I open it and taste it?

620
00:32:33,320 --> 00:32:36,440
Speaker 3: Now, that's up to you, honestly.

621
00:32:36,160 --> 00:32:38,280
Speaker 2: Should Okay, do you ever serve this over ice?

622
00:32:38,960 --> 00:32:42,680
Speaker 3: I do imagine serving this over ice could be a

623
00:32:42,720 --> 00:32:45,280
Speaker 3: good idea to get it cold. But in my opinion,

624
00:32:45,760 --> 00:32:47,960
Speaker 3: soda directly out of a glass bottle is the way

625
00:32:48,000 --> 00:32:52,080
Speaker 3: to taste it as its creator intended. I think it's better,

626
00:32:53,080 --> 00:32:56,840
Speaker 3: better than plastic and cans. I think it preserves things better.

627
00:32:56,920 --> 00:32:59,680
Speaker 3: That's one of the joys of glass bottles. And exactly

628
00:33:00,000 --> 00:33:02,200
Speaker 3: as soon as it touches that ice, it's gonna start

629
00:33:02,240 --> 00:33:04,440
Speaker 3: getting a little water down. I think you got to

630
00:33:04,440 --> 00:33:05,920
Speaker 3: go out of the bottle first, and then if you

631
00:33:05,960 --> 00:33:08,200
Speaker 3: want to switch it to ice, you can. But I

632
00:33:08,200 --> 00:33:10,320
Speaker 3: think out of the bottle gives you that that taste

633
00:33:10,360 --> 00:33:11,280
Speaker 3: in its purest form.

634
00:33:11,720 --> 00:33:14,520
Speaker 2: I absolutely agree with you. I feel like, I don't

635
00:33:14,520 --> 00:33:16,520
Speaker 2: know if it's just a mental thing, but when I'm

636
00:33:16,560 --> 00:33:18,560
Speaker 2: at home and if I pour a soda over ice,

637
00:33:18,920 --> 00:33:20,960
Speaker 2: it makes me it tastes like I have the flu.

638
00:33:22,280 --> 00:33:23,280
Speaker 3: I just understand.

639
00:33:23,400 --> 00:33:24,320
Speaker 2: Does that make sense?

640
00:33:24,440 --> 00:33:24,880
Speaker 3: It does?

641
00:33:24,960 --> 00:33:27,800
Speaker 2: It does to me that I guess that memory of

642
00:33:27,840 --> 00:33:30,480
Speaker 2: like when you're sick when you're a kid and my

643
00:33:30,520 --> 00:33:33,200
Speaker 2: mom would give us like a sprite or something over ice,

644
00:33:33,240 --> 00:33:34,680
Speaker 2: and it's a horrible memory.

645
00:33:35,080 --> 00:33:37,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, I get it, and I'm also I'll also say

646
00:33:37,960 --> 00:33:41,360
Speaker 3: in a movie theater too, I say no ice every time.

647
00:33:41,840 --> 00:33:43,560
Speaker 2: Really, even a movie theater.

648
00:33:43,480 --> 00:33:45,760
Speaker 3: They give you so much ice that by the time

649
00:33:45,760 --> 00:33:49,120
Speaker 3: you're about forty five minutes into that movie, you're drinking

650
00:33:49,280 --> 00:33:53,280
Speaker 3: this weird combination of it's not watered down soda, but

651
00:33:53,280 --> 00:33:56,560
Speaker 3: then I also feel like you can feel the stretches

652
00:33:56,600 --> 00:33:59,680
Speaker 3: that sometimes it'll come through in different temperatures sip to sip.

653
00:33:59,720 --> 00:34:02,520
Speaker 3: I don't I don't care for it. I want my

654
00:34:02,600 --> 00:34:08,200
Speaker 3: soda to be present to I want to taste it

655
00:34:08,320 --> 00:34:11,480
Speaker 3: as the person who bottled that soda or bagged that

656
00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:13,120
Speaker 3: syrup intended.

657
00:34:13,760 --> 00:34:16,560
Speaker 2: Now, what about like if you were at a fast

658
00:34:16,560 --> 00:34:17,360
Speaker 2: food restaurant.

659
00:34:18,160 --> 00:34:20,640
Speaker 3: If I'm at a fast food restaurant, again, no ice,

660
00:34:20,840 --> 00:34:23,600
Speaker 3: I would say in general, I go no ice when

661
00:34:23,600 --> 00:34:25,840
Speaker 3: it comes to soda, almost as a wow.

662
00:34:26,360 --> 00:34:29,879
Speaker 2: And I've never had no ice soda at a movie

663
00:34:29,960 --> 00:34:31,280
Speaker 2: theater or a fast food place.

664
00:34:31,520 --> 00:34:35,480
Speaker 3: It's still cold, it's cold enough, it's cold enough, and

665
00:34:35,960 --> 00:34:40,919
Speaker 3: what you trade in coldness, you gain in respect for

666
00:34:41,880 --> 00:34:44,640
Speaker 3: a craftsman or a crafts woman, crafts person.

667
00:34:45,400 --> 00:34:49,680
Speaker 2: What is your go to soda? Like easy soda to get.

668
00:34:49,680 --> 00:34:51,800
Speaker 3: Easy soda to get? I mean, I think the most

669
00:34:51,840 --> 00:34:55,040
Speaker 3: popular one that is pretty much everywhere now and in

670
00:34:55,080 --> 00:34:56,920
Speaker 3: my time as a soda collectors to become just more

671
00:34:56,920 --> 00:34:59,520
Speaker 3: and more ubiquitous is of course the famous Mexican coke.

672
00:35:00,160 --> 00:35:04,160
Speaker 3: Everybody loves a Mexican coke. When I lived in New

673
00:35:04,239 --> 00:35:07,040
Speaker 3: York City, a big part of how this started is

674
00:35:07,080 --> 00:35:11,719
Speaker 3: there's a ginger ale called Bruce cost Fresh Ginger ginger Ale,

675
00:35:12,440 --> 00:35:15,759
Speaker 3: where there's actually chunks of ginger that float in the

676
00:35:15,760 --> 00:35:17,520
Speaker 3: bottom of the bottle, so you turn it up and

677
00:35:17,640 --> 00:35:21,080
Speaker 3: down a couple of times and it's absolutely delicious. And

678
00:35:22,000 --> 00:35:25,080
Speaker 3: probably around two thousand and eight I started noticing it.

679
00:35:25,760 --> 00:35:28,520
Speaker 3: When I tasted, I said, wow, this is something really special,

680
00:35:29,400 --> 00:35:33,600
Speaker 3: and I started buying it, and again as someone who

681
00:35:33,600 --> 00:35:37,719
Speaker 3: doesn't drink it's it's an interesting product. It's in these

682
00:35:37,719 --> 00:35:39,960
Speaker 3: glass bottles. I found. I could bring them with me

683
00:35:40,080 --> 00:35:43,200
Speaker 3: to parties and they'd allow me to have the glass bottle,

684
00:35:43,239 --> 00:35:45,640
Speaker 3: which makes people more comfortable. And then also people would

685
00:35:45,640 --> 00:35:47,319
Speaker 3: be like, what is that it was a little bit

686
00:35:47,320 --> 00:35:51,240
Speaker 3: of a conversation piece, and then it got me really

687
00:35:51,280 --> 00:35:53,839
Speaker 3: into kind of figuring out what are the what are

688
00:35:53,880 --> 00:35:57,319
Speaker 3: the non corporate sodas out there? And then I found

689
00:35:57,320 --> 00:35:59,880
Speaker 3: out about how many of them are beloved. Like if

690
00:35:59,920 --> 00:36:03,040
Speaker 3: you go to Maine, they drink Moxie constantly and the

691
00:36:03,080 --> 00:36:04,920
Speaker 3: rest of us don't really have access to it, and

692
00:36:04,960 --> 00:36:06,680
Speaker 3: a lot of people don't like it when they try it,

693
00:36:06,719 --> 00:36:09,960
Speaker 3: but it's like an institution there. And I could name

694
00:36:10,000 --> 00:36:13,640
Speaker 3: soda up and down. Moxie is like a cola but

695
00:36:13,719 --> 00:36:16,560
Speaker 3: has a sort of very herby medicinal taste. I could

696
00:36:16,640 --> 00:36:19,960
Speaker 3: go all day. This is so nerdy and uninteresting, though.

697
00:36:20,080 --> 00:36:22,399
Speaker 2: I think you have found the right person to talk

698
00:36:22,440 --> 00:36:26,440
Speaker 2: to about soda. I think it's very, I mean, very fascinating.

699
00:36:26,520 --> 00:36:30,040
Speaker 3: It's I mean, if you look at Detroit and they're

700
00:36:30,040 --> 00:36:32,080
Speaker 3: going to be drink they grew up on Werner's, which

701
00:36:32,120 --> 00:36:34,520
Speaker 3: I think is the best sweet ginger all you're gonna find.

702
00:36:34,880 --> 00:36:37,840
Speaker 3: They grew up on Fago, which the insane clown Posse

703
00:36:37,920 --> 00:36:42,480
Speaker 3: has made famous, but because it's really beloved in Detroit, Texas,

704
00:36:42,560 --> 00:36:45,320
Speaker 3: has one of the most fascinating stories. Dublin Doctor Pepper,

705
00:36:45,800 --> 00:36:49,960
Speaker 3: the Dublin bottling works. This is to me fascinating, but

706
00:36:50,320 --> 00:36:52,400
Speaker 3: to everyone else boring. And this is why many people

707
00:36:52,440 --> 00:36:56,080
Speaker 3: do say Cola scola is in fact funnier than there

708
00:36:56,160 --> 00:37:00,600
Speaker 3: was a doctor. Pepper had their original contract. Did bottling

709
00:37:00,640 --> 00:37:02,799
Speaker 3: plants from way back in the day. And as they

710
00:37:02,880 --> 00:37:06,160
Speaker 3: became more corporate and it became more centralized, these plants

711
00:37:06,160 --> 00:37:09,879
Speaker 3: would work with them. Some would shut down. And in

712
00:37:09,920 --> 00:37:13,880
Speaker 3: the eighties, late seventies, early eighties, a lot of the

713
00:37:13,880 --> 00:37:16,680
Speaker 3: big soda bottlers got together and said, let's stop using sugar.

714
00:37:16,760 --> 00:37:19,080
Speaker 3: Let's all switch to corn syrup at once. Sugar's way

715
00:37:19,120 --> 00:37:21,759
Speaker 3: more expensive if we all do it together. It's just

716
00:37:21,840 --> 00:37:25,520
Speaker 3: the new standard. People don't complain this. One little bottling

717
00:37:25,520 --> 00:37:28,319
Speaker 3: plant in Dublin, Texas said we're just going to stick

718
00:37:28,360 --> 00:37:31,319
Speaker 3: with the sugar, and they were the only ones, and

719
00:37:31,360 --> 00:37:33,960
Speaker 3: it just tasted better because sugar is better. Cane sugar

720
00:37:34,080 --> 00:37:36,680
Speaker 3: is one of the entry points for me with the sodas.

721
00:37:36,719 --> 00:37:38,920
Speaker 3: I find glass bottle cane sugar. Those are really the

722
00:37:38,920 --> 00:37:42,080
Speaker 3: two things I look for out of the gate. They

723
00:37:42,120 --> 00:37:44,319
Speaker 3: stuck with it, and people obsessed over it. People used

724
00:37:44,320 --> 00:37:47,040
Speaker 3: to drive for miles to get the soda they actually

725
00:37:47,040 --> 00:37:50,320
Speaker 3: grew up with in Texas. And then doctor Pepper realized

726
00:37:50,320 --> 00:37:52,399
Speaker 3: that if they put out special editions with their own

727
00:37:52,480 --> 00:37:55,279
Speaker 3: cane sugar, they can make money. So there was a

728
00:37:55,400 --> 00:37:58,160
Speaker 3: court case at one point which was doctor Pepper versus

729
00:37:58,200 --> 00:38:03,080
Speaker 3: Doctor Pepper. They shut down their little their little original

730
00:38:03,080 --> 00:38:07,600
Speaker 3: bottling plant from a producing Doctor Pepper, but that bottling

731
00:38:07,640 --> 00:38:09,880
Speaker 3: plants survived and they make their own sodas now and

732
00:38:09,920 --> 00:38:12,959
Speaker 3: they're all great. So if you're in Texas passing through,

733
00:38:13,360 --> 00:38:15,600
Speaker 3: grab yourself a Doublin product. You won't regret it.

734
00:38:16,280 --> 00:38:19,360
Speaker 2: No, is there any soda that you haven't tried that

735
00:38:19,400 --> 00:38:21,640
Speaker 2: you like? A dream soda you'd like to try?

736
00:38:21,920 --> 00:38:24,920
Speaker 3: I am so mad that you asked me this because

737
00:38:26,040 --> 00:38:32,080
Speaker 3: the answer is really embarrassing. I guess so. The Natrona,

738
00:38:32,200 --> 00:38:34,720
Speaker 3: oh god, this is a long straight The Rona Bottling

739
00:38:34,760 --> 00:38:38,120
Speaker 3: works outside of Pittsburgh. Natrona, Pennsylvania. They make great products, too,

740
00:38:38,200 --> 00:38:43,600
Speaker 3: great products, Jamaica's finest ginger beer, red ribbon. They make

741
00:38:43,640 --> 00:38:48,200
Speaker 3: a product called Pennsylvania Punch, so very very lightly carbonated,

742
00:38:48,719 --> 00:38:52,439
Speaker 3: very sweet, almost tanging grape soda. And when I first

743
00:38:52,480 --> 00:38:55,120
Speaker 3: had it, I really liked it and realized this was

744
00:38:55,200 --> 00:38:58,160
Speaker 3: their effort to replicate the formula of something known as

745
00:38:58,239 --> 00:39:04,320
Speaker 3: Delaware Punch, which was extraordinarily popular in Louisiana surrounding states

746
00:39:04,520 --> 00:39:07,640
Speaker 3: in the first half of the twentieth century. Coca Cola

747
00:39:07,760 --> 00:39:11,520
Speaker 3: bought them out. Coca Cola owns the formulas and brands

748
00:39:11,560 --> 00:39:15,480
Speaker 3: for dozens of former competitors. They just go buy them out.

749
00:39:16,080 --> 00:39:21,200
Speaker 3: Found out Delaware Punch still exists. Coke makes it for

750
00:39:22,000 --> 00:39:26,040
Speaker 3: New Orleans and like a handful of counties or parishes

751
00:39:26,080 --> 00:39:28,560
Speaker 3: they might call them in Louisiana forget. So I was

752
00:39:28,600 --> 00:39:30,600
Speaker 3: down in New Orleans doing shows once with the Great

753
00:39:30,640 --> 00:39:34,399
Speaker 3: Joe Firestone. Oh wonderful, And I made Joe wander through

754
00:39:34,440 --> 00:39:36,719
Speaker 3: the New Orleans humidity and heat as we went from

755
00:39:36,719 --> 00:39:39,440
Speaker 3: Delhi to Delhi looking for Delaware Punch, and we wandered

756
00:39:39,480 --> 00:39:42,960
Speaker 3: into neighborhood. I don't know that it was bad. I

757
00:39:42,960 --> 00:39:46,319
Speaker 3: can say that I did feel concerned that I had

758
00:39:46,320 --> 00:39:50,280
Speaker 3: brought Joe there. Started to say, this doesn't feel totally

759
00:39:50,400 --> 00:39:53,000
Speaker 3: right to hang out here as a tourist. But we

760
00:39:53,040 --> 00:39:55,640
Speaker 3: found it. I drank it. I need to be clear.

761
00:39:56,480 --> 00:40:00,359
Speaker 3: I did not like it, way too sweet. Turns out

762
00:40:00,360 --> 00:40:03,520
Speaker 3: that the original Delaware Punch isn't even carbonated. It was

763
00:40:03,560 --> 00:40:06,080
Speaker 3: just a famous non alcoholic drink that Coke shut down.

764
00:40:06,320 --> 00:40:09,680
Speaker 3: Now I have since found out that when Coke shut

765
00:40:09,719 --> 00:40:12,560
Speaker 3: them down, they did not buy out a bottling plant

766
00:40:12,880 --> 00:40:16,000
Speaker 3: in Guatemala. And in Guatemala there is a plant that

767
00:40:16,880 --> 00:40:20,800
Speaker 3: has one key difference, which is since Delaware Punch is

768
00:40:20,840 --> 00:40:24,799
Speaker 3: original run, the FDA has outlawed a certain type of

769
00:40:24,800 --> 00:40:29,600
Speaker 3: purple food coloring, so in Guatemala there is the actual

770
00:40:29,680 --> 00:40:34,400
Speaker 3: original formula Delaware Punch. I have to imagine that the

771
00:40:34,400 --> 00:40:36,719
Speaker 3: type of food coloring does not change the taste at all.

772
00:40:37,800 --> 00:40:45,080
Speaker 3: But I have long wanted to fly to Guatemala to

773
00:40:45,200 --> 00:40:47,759
Speaker 3: find a bottle of it, because I think it might

774
00:40:47,800 --> 00:40:49,800
Speaker 3: be one of the more rare things you can find

775
00:40:49,840 --> 00:40:55,640
Speaker 3: soda wise. But to be clear again, I have legitimately

776
00:40:55,680 --> 00:40:57,919
Speaker 3: come close on a few occasions to booking a ticket

777
00:40:58,000 --> 00:41:01,120
Speaker 3: to Guatemala so I can get drink that I know

778
00:41:02,040 --> 00:41:03,920
Speaker 3: I do not like. I don't like it.

779
00:41:04,920 --> 00:41:07,400
Speaker 2: Would you be happy if someone from Guatemala's ship the

780
00:41:07,480 --> 00:41:07,960
Speaker 2: drink to you?

781
00:41:08,320 --> 00:41:10,160
Speaker 3: I would. But I have to imagine that if US

782
00:41:10,239 --> 00:41:12,359
Speaker 3: customs found it, they'd pull it because it has this

783
00:41:12,440 --> 00:41:17,040
Speaker 3: illegal purple food coloring which come on. I can't imagine

784
00:41:17,040 --> 00:41:20,320
Speaker 3: that in one serving, this is gonna make me sterile

785
00:41:20,440 --> 00:41:23,720
Speaker 3: or breakout in hives or whatever it causes. Knock on wood,

786
00:41:23,920 --> 00:41:26,279
Speaker 3: I mean famous last words.

787
00:41:26,280 --> 00:41:27,520
Speaker 2: But again worth the risk.

788
00:41:28,320 --> 00:41:31,799
Speaker 3: I think we're so. I think so. Now does col

789
00:41:31,840 --> 00:41:34,600
Speaker 3: A skull a deep dive into characters and crush it

790
00:41:34,640 --> 00:41:40,040
Speaker 3: at Joe's cub anytime? Anytime Cole wants to? Yes? But

791
00:41:40,120 --> 00:41:42,680
Speaker 3: has Cole ever told the longest story in the world

792
00:41:42,680 --> 00:41:44,359
Speaker 3: about a bad grape soft drink?

793
00:41:44,640 --> 00:41:48,560
Speaker 2: I will say when Cole was on, they told a

794
00:41:48,600 --> 00:41:52,879
Speaker 2: story about it was probably one to three hours long,

795
00:41:52,880 --> 00:41:55,719
Speaker 2: about drinking this drink, and we just had to cut

796
00:41:55,719 --> 00:41:59,880
Speaker 2: it from the episode. It was excruciating to listen to.

797
00:42:00,200 --> 00:42:03,279
Speaker 2: And I just said, Cole, no one's gonna want to

798
00:42:03,320 --> 00:42:05,920
Speaker 2: hear this about the drink. Let's just get rid of it.

799
00:42:05,960 --> 00:42:08,000
Speaker 2: So I will say, Cole does have that on you.

800
00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:12,000
Speaker 3: I'm going to tell you what. Though I used to

801
00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:15,000
Speaker 3: be cool, My work used to be regarded as kind

802
00:42:15,000 --> 00:42:18,400
Speaker 3: of hip. People used to be like, oh, this guy's

803
00:42:18,440 --> 00:42:20,719
Speaker 3: trying some things that are really different in underground and

804
00:42:20,760 --> 00:42:24,040
Speaker 3: counterculture and all of us. I don't care who you

805
00:42:24,080 --> 00:42:28,759
Speaker 3: are and what you're living right now. Someday you're gonna

806
00:42:28,760 --> 00:42:30,799
Speaker 3: get old and you're gonna feel lame, and I can

807
00:42:30,880 --> 00:42:34,200
Speaker 3: vouch for that personally. I can vouch for that personally.

808
00:42:35,239 --> 00:42:38,040
Speaker 3: Someday you're gonna have nothing to talk about except soda

809
00:42:38,080 --> 00:42:40,840
Speaker 3: in lawn care, and you're gonna go When did this change?

810
00:42:41,560 --> 00:42:45,200
Speaker 3: When did this switch? Happens very quickly, like a switch

811
00:42:45,239 --> 00:42:50,480
Speaker 3: getting flipped. I went from cool to crust the crusty

812
00:42:50,520 --> 00:42:54,279
Speaker 3: old uncle in the blink of an eye. And it's

813
00:42:54,320 --> 00:42:56,960
Speaker 3: been overwhelming me. And I just have to understand that

814
00:42:56,960 --> 00:42:58,799
Speaker 3: that is the reality of my life now, and I

815
00:42:58,800 --> 00:42:59,480
Speaker 3: got to own it.

816
00:43:00,080 --> 00:43:03,000
Speaker 2: That's a reality of every life. And if you're a

817
00:43:03,040 --> 00:43:06,280
Speaker 2: young person and just be aware that's coming for.

818
00:43:06,200 --> 00:43:09,920
Speaker 3: You, understand that the looming, absolutely the looming clouds of

819
00:43:10,000 --> 00:43:13,640
Speaker 3: becoming an out of touch older person will strike you

820
00:43:13,680 --> 00:43:15,680
Speaker 3: down as well. I can't tell you. If you look

821
00:43:15,719 --> 00:43:17,640
Speaker 3: at my early career, a lot of it was actually

822
00:43:17,719 --> 00:43:23,799
Speaker 3: defined by reaching an audience directly through social media, through

823
00:43:23,840 --> 00:43:27,080
Speaker 3: pulling off some I guess you could almost call them

824
00:43:27,120 --> 00:43:31,239
Speaker 3: like stunts or events via social media. I think I

825
00:43:31,280 --> 00:43:34,480
Speaker 3: was actually someone who, especially with I once did a

826
00:43:34,480 --> 00:43:38,160
Speaker 3: thing that involved Diddy in two thousand and nine where

827
00:43:38,440 --> 00:43:40,680
Speaker 3: I asked him to do a show with me on Twitter,

828
00:43:40,760 --> 00:43:43,160
Speaker 3: and he said yes for some reason. I still don't

829
00:43:43,200 --> 00:43:45,640
Speaker 3: quite know if he went, oh, Twitter is this thing

830
00:43:45,760 --> 00:43:47,920
Speaker 3: and generate a conversation. And I can tell you that

831
00:43:48,000 --> 00:43:52,080
Speaker 3: the day I downloaded Snapchat, not only did I say

832
00:43:52,320 --> 00:43:56,600
Speaker 3: I don't understand Snapchat, it almost short circuited my brain

833
00:43:56,640 --> 00:44:00,000
Speaker 3: where I no longer understood Instagram, Twitter or Facebook either.

834
00:44:01,280 --> 00:44:04,480
Speaker 3: I hit a wall that makes perfect sense. TikTok. I

835
00:44:04,520 --> 00:44:06,279
Speaker 3: never even tried. I knew it would just make me

836
00:44:06,360 --> 00:44:09,200
Speaker 3: feel even worse about myself, But it really is to that.

837
00:44:09,320 --> 00:44:12,920
Speaker 3: The day, and I'm not kidding, the day I tried Snapchat,

838
00:44:12,960 --> 00:44:17,560
Speaker 3: which was a step in everybody's social media evolution and

839
00:44:17,600 --> 00:44:22,000
Speaker 3: that young people love, I said I don't get this,

840
00:44:22,320 --> 00:44:24,640
Speaker 3: and all of a sudden I was old, right, And

841
00:44:24,680 --> 00:44:27,799
Speaker 3: all of a sudden, I only had jokes about fertilizer

842
00:44:27,920 --> 00:44:30,640
Speaker 3: and broad leaved weed prevention. All of a sudden, I

843
00:44:30,760 --> 00:44:35,239
Speaker 3: just had a very standard suburban set, and it was

844
00:44:35,400 --> 00:44:38,320
Speaker 3: It was shocking how quick it all happened. The moment

845
00:44:38,400 --> 00:44:40,880
Speaker 3: I opened that app, I was old.

846
00:44:41,440 --> 00:44:45,319
Speaker 2: It's the Indiana Jones goblet moment. It wasn't picking the

847
00:44:45,360 --> 00:44:48,479
Speaker 2: wrong goblet and suddenly you're a thousand years old.

848
00:44:48,680 --> 00:44:53,359
Speaker 4: Yes, you agent to dusk before everyone's eyes. No, I'm

849
00:44:53,400 --> 00:44:55,680
Speaker 4: someone who really I dig my heel. You know, had

850
00:44:55,960 --> 00:45:00,879
Speaker 4: I used an iPod well into the Spotify years things

851
00:45:00,960 --> 00:45:03,800
Speaker 4: like this, So I'm going to feel it hard.

852
00:45:03,880 --> 00:45:08,480
Speaker 3: I think you're in a danger zone. Your personality is

853
00:45:08,520 --> 00:45:12,239
Speaker 3: in a danger zone for an immediate downfall. And it's

854
00:45:12,239 --> 00:45:14,319
Speaker 3: not when you turn forty. Everybody thinks it's when you

855
00:45:14,360 --> 00:45:18,640
Speaker 3: turn forty. It's when you turn forty one. I was like,

856
00:45:18,680 --> 00:45:20,880
Speaker 3: this forty thing is over rated, and now I'm forty

857
00:45:20,920 --> 00:45:23,719
Speaker 3: one and I go sometime in the last year. I

858
00:45:23,920 --> 00:45:28,680
Speaker 3: honestly am someone who is confused about how to add

859
00:45:28,680 --> 00:45:32,520
Speaker 3: an attachment to an email, like, for example, like I'm

860
00:45:32,600 --> 00:45:35,759
Speaker 3: recording separate audio for you right out, and I have

861
00:45:35,800 --> 00:45:37,120
Speaker 3: to send it over. This is how a lot of

862
00:45:37,120 --> 00:45:39,560
Speaker 3: the Zoom podcasts work to pull back the curtain for listeners.

863
00:45:40,320 --> 00:45:44,320
Speaker 3: Getting you this audio will either take me ninety seconds

864
00:45:44,920 --> 00:45:46,800
Speaker 3: or four entire days.

865
00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:51,880
Speaker 2: And that is fortunately you're locked in a room. Yes, yes,

866
00:45:52,239 --> 00:45:54,400
Speaker 2: and you're probably also going to well, you're already on

867
00:45:54,440 --> 00:45:57,760
Speaker 2: your hotel's WiFi, So that hurdle has been leaped.

868
00:45:57,400 --> 00:46:01,200
Speaker 3: And it is not great WiFi. Some reason. It craps

869
00:46:01,200 --> 00:46:02,680
Speaker 3: out at nine pm every night.

870
00:46:03,040 --> 00:46:05,799
Speaker 2: Oh you're kidding what They flip a switch and then I.

871
00:46:05,760 --> 00:46:08,120
Speaker 3: Call the front desk and they pretend it's not happening.

872
00:46:08,960 --> 00:46:11,399
Speaker 3: They're like, have you tried resetting your computer? I say yes,

873
00:46:11,920 --> 00:46:14,920
Speaker 3: And We've had this conversation four times. And I know

874
00:46:15,000 --> 00:46:17,439
Speaker 3: you're down there trying to click refresh to check out

875
00:46:17,440 --> 00:46:21,239
Speaker 3: whatever basketball stores or whatever your face. I know you're

876
00:46:21,280 --> 00:46:23,759
Speaker 3: having the same problem, buddy, So let's not pretend this

877
00:46:23,920 --> 00:46:24,760
Speaker 3: deceptive game.

878
00:46:25,120 --> 00:46:29,800
Speaker 2: You're being gaslighted by the Sandman signature. I am, I am, okay.

879
00:46:30,080 --> 00:46:32,760
Speaker 2: Look I have not tasted the soda yet. This is shocking.

880
00:46:32,800 --> 00:46:33,960
Speaker 2: I've got to taste the soda.

881
00:46:34,080 --> 00:46:35,840
Speaker 3: Well, when you have a vibe like you and I

882
00:46:35,880 --> 00:46:38,440
Speaker 3: have discovered between one another, you you live in it.

883
00:46:38,560 --> 00:46:40,520
Speaker 3: So yes, but let's get back to work.

884
00:46:41,000 --> 00:46:46,040
Speaker 2: Let's see what's happening here. That is that's actually an

885
00:46:46,120 --> 00:46:47,720
Speaker 2: accurate cucumber flavor.

886
00:46:48,360 --> 00:46:51,280
Speaker 3: Yes, but that's shocking, but still a sweet soda.

887
00:46:51,840 --> 00:46:54,560
Speaker 2: I didn't know how. I didn't expect it to be

888
00:46:54,600 --> 00:46:57,799
Speaker 2: sweet at all. Yeah, it's not a celt refreshing. It

889
00:46:57,880 --> 00:46:59,880
Speaker 2: is not a seltzer. That is a soda. Oh, it

890
00:47:00,080 --> 00:47:02,600
Speaker 2: certainly has like a sugar element to it, but it

891
00:47:02,640 --> 00:47:04,080
Speaker 2: doesn't get in the way of cucumber.

892
00:47:04,440 --> 00:47:06,719
Speaker 3: I'm very happy to see because I'm lucky that I

893
00:47:06,719 --> 00:47:08,600
Speaker 3: can see your facial expression right now and I can

894
00:47:08,640 --> 00:47:11,399
Speaker 3: tell the listener. I'm so happy to see that you

895
00:47:11,440 --> 00:47:14,640
Speaker 3: are You are taken aback. You are taken aback by this.

896
00:47:14,680 --> 00:47:16,759
Speaker 3: It's not what you expected, and it is better than

897
00:47:16,800 --> 00:47:19,000
Speaker 3: what you expected. Everyone has this reaction.

898
00:47:19,200 --> 00:47:23,520
Speaker 2: Cucumber is such a mild flavor even when you're eating cucumber,

899
00:47:24,040 --> 00:47:26,320
Speaker 2: So the fact that they've been able to duplicate it

900
00:47:26,400 --> 00:47:29,200
Speaker 2: and make I mean, does this have actual cucumber?

901
00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:30,120
Speaker 3: I love this.

902
00:47:30,280 --> 00:47:33,160
Speaker 2: It says natural cucumber extract. There's a lot of cucumber

903
00:47:33,160 --> 00:47:35,600
Speaker 2: happening then, because I feel like this is probably one

904
00:47:35,640 --> 00:47:37,920
Speaker 2: hundred cucumbers to get that flavor in a bottle.

905
00:47:38,000 --> 00:47:39,919
Speaker 3: I bet, I bet, I mean, I bet I bet

906
00:47:39,960 --> 00:47:43,320
Speaker 3: this company alone is helping to keep the cucumber farming

907
00:47:43,320 --> 00:47:45,360
Speaker 3: industry healthy and robust.

908
00:47:46,560 --> 00:47:49,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, this is truly shocking to me because I feel

909
00:47:49,760 --> 00:47:52,840
Speaker 2: like I've had other sodas that try to duplicate flavors

910
00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:56,920
Speaker 2: and it's frequently not accurate. I mean, famously, banana is

911
00:47:56,960 --> 00:47:58,480
Speaker 2: the worst start official flavor.

912
00:47:58,600 --> 00:48:01,440
Speaker 3: Great people love grapes, soda and candy, but it's not.

913
00:48:01,640 --> 00:48:03,080
Speaker 3: It does not taste like grapes.

914
00:48:03,360 --> 00:48:05,360
Speaker 2: It doesn't resemble like if you were to taste that

915
00:48:05,400 --> 00:48:08,279
Speaker 2: without knowing, without the word grape being attached to be like, oh,

916
00:48:08,320 --> 00:48:11,000
Speaker 2: I don't know what this is. This is a flavor.

917
00:48:11,440 --> 00:48:13,759
Speaker 2: I wouldn't have been able to point to anything in

918
00:48:13,840 --> 00:48:14,799
Speaker 2: nature that tastes like that.

919
00:48:14,840 --> 00:48:17,440
Speaker 3: It's an often pleasant fit flavor, but it ain't. It

920
00:48:17,440 --> 00:48:18,719
Speaker 3: ain't grapes, we know.

921
00:48:18,880 --> 00:48:21,640
Speaker 2: No, it's certainly not. I mean, but what you just tasted,

922
00:48:22,239 --> 00:48:25,719
Speaker 2: that's cucumber. That's absolutely cucumber. And let me ask you this.

923
00:48:26,280 --> 00:48:28,359
Speaker 2: When you eat a salad and there's a cucumber in it,

924
00:48:28,760 --> 00:48:34,200
Speaker 2: are you thrilled? This is I'm thrilled if the cucumber

925
00:48:34,320 --> 00:48:38,120
Speaker 2: is fresh and crisp, but it's frequently soggy, and then

926
00:48:38,120 --> 00:48:39,720
Speaker 2: it's just like what am I chewing?

927
00:48:40,160 --> 00:48:43,600
Speaker 3: Now? How do you compare the flavor you're tasting and

928
00:48:43,640 --> 00:48:47,040
Speaker 3: that soda to the range of cucumbers you just describe.

929
00:48:47,680 --> 00:48:49,759
Speaker 3: The cucumbers can be a let down, but they can

930
00:48:49,840 --> 00:48:51,680
Speaker 3: sometimes actually really work for you.

931
00:48:52,120 --> 00:48:55,920
Speaker 2: Sometimes a cucumber is nothing. I love a good cucumber.

932
00:48:56,000 --> 00:48:58,560
Speaker 2: I will I adore a good cucumber with a little

933
00:48:58,600 --> 00:49:02,319
Speaker 2: light vinegar on it or dipped in ranch. Love it.

934
00:49:03,120 --> 00:49:05,319
Speaker 2: I think a cucumber is a very underrated vegetable. You

935
00:49:05,320 --> 00:49:08,360
Speaker 2: can just snack on it as needed if the texture

936
00:49:08,400 --> 00:49:13,520
Speaker 2: is correct. But a cucumber, when done wrong, is flavorless

937
00:49:13,560 --> 00:49:17,520
Speaker 2: mush yeah with seeds, and that doesn't work. So this

938
00:49:17,960 --> 00:49:20,040
Speaker 2: to be able to count on a flavor from a soda,

939
00:49:20,280 --> 00:49:24,239
Speaker 2: that's the ideal of a cucumber. That's kind of I

940
00:49:24,280 --> 00:49:26,279
Speaker 2: honestly think that's a little bit of a miracle. And

941
00:49:26,320 --> 00:49:28,480
Speaker 2: the fact that this isn't a more popular soda.

942
00:49:28,280 --> 00:49:31,080
Speaker 3: Shoca astounding and I'm so glad you're seeing this. You've

943
00:49:31,080 --> 00:49:34,600
Speaker 3: referred to it as a miracle, and I am with you.

944
00:49:34,680 --> 00:49:42,160
Speaker 3: This should be, in my opinion, Coke Spray, your ginger als,

945
00:49:42,239 --> 00:49:46,560
Speaker 3: your orange sodas. I feel like more people should be

946
00:49:46,600 --> 00:49:49,400
Speaker 3: adding cucumber soda to that very regular mix. And this

947
00:49:49,520 --> 00:49:51,560
Speaker 3: is the only company I would choose to do that, right.

948
00:49:52,120 --> 00:49:56,480
Speaker 2: I don't want to shame anybody, but the Sprite people.

949
00:49:57,520 --> 00:50:01,800
Speaker 2: Sprite continues to mystify me. It's neither lemon nor limes,

950
00:50:01,960 --> 00:50:05,160
Speaker 2: not both. Yes, it is does not approach either of

951
00:50:05,200 --> 00:50:07,719
Speaker 2: those citrus. I don't Why don't they just call it

952
00:50:07,760 --> 00:50:11,399
Speaker 2: sweet water? Yeah, it's I would love a lemon lime

953
00:50:11,440 --> 00:50:14,400
Speaker 2: flavored soda, but I've never had a tangy I expect

954
00:50:14,400 --> 00:50:16,840
Speaker 2: that to be tangy. It's not tangy. It's not sour.

955
00:50:17,239 --> 00:50:21,399
Speaker 2: It's just clear liquid with sugar. You should try Bubble Up.

956
00:50:22,040 --> 00:50:22,680
Speaker 2: Bubble Up.

957
00:50:22,880 --> 00:50:27,640
Speaker 3: Bubble Up is the bottled cane sugar under the radar

958
00:50:28,560 --> 00:50:32,080
Speaker 3: sprite type drink that I think you'd I think you'd

959
00:50:32,160 --> 00:50:32,520
Speaker 3: enjoy it.

960
00:50:32,520 --> 00:50:33,920
Speaker 2: It's a better does it feel like it has a

961
00:50:34,000 --> 00:50:35,160
Speaker 2: lemony flavor to it?

962
00:50:35,160 --> 00:50:38,040
Speaker 3: It's it's much closer to what you're describing than sprite is.

963
00:50:38,960 --> 00:50:41,080
Speaker 2: That's kind of a dream drink for me. You know,

964
00:50:41,160 --> 00:50:43,239
Speaker 2: I love a lemon, I love a lime, I love

965
00:50:43,280 --> 00:50:43,680
Speaker 2: a soda.

966
00:50:43,840 --> 00:50:46,719
Speaker 3: There's another one. Ooh, what is the name of it?

967
00:50:46,760 --> 00:50:48,400
Speaker 3: How am I blanking? I'm claiming to be a soda

968
00:50:48,400 --> 00:50:51,239
Speaker 3: expert and they have it at Calcus. There's another even

969
00:50:51,320 --> 00:50:57,320
Speaker 3: harder to find lemon lime soda that uses actual lemon

970
00:50:57,440 --> 00:51:03,440
Speaker 3: and lime oils, and now is great. And I'm so

971
00:51:03,680 --> 00:51:05,960
Speaker 3: mad at myself that I'm blanking on it. Right now

972
00:51:06,000 --> 00:51:09,280
Speaker 3: it's not lemmy. Lemy is just a straight ahead lemon soda.

973
00:51:09,840 --> 00:51:12,280
Speaker 2: Okay.

974
00:51:12,440 --> 00:51:14,120
Speaker 3: I hope I think of it by the end of this,

975
00:51:14,760 --> 00:51:16,359
Speaker 3: and I will not forgive myself if.

976
00:51:16,320 --> 00:51:18,560
Speaker 2: I don't devote at least part of your brain energy

977
00:51:18,600 --> 00:51:23,080
Speaker 2: for the rest of this podcast as well, trying to remember, Okay,

978
00:51:23,120 --> 00:51:25,040
Speaker 2: this is wonderful. I'm going to reserve the rest of

979
00:51:25,080 --> 00:51:28,319
Speaker 2: this to be have cold because I do feel like

980
00:51:28,360 --> 00:51:30,080
Speaker 2: that'll add an extra element to it.

981
00:51:30,320 --> 00:51:32,000
Speaker 3: I think people should seek this out.

982
00:51:32,480 --> 00:51:35,240
Speaker 2: It's delicious. This should be in more markets.

983
00:51:35,000 --> 00:51:38,040
Speaker 3: Absolutely can, and can you imagine I always say this

984
00:51:38,080 --> 00:51:40,279
Speaker 3: to people. First of all, I don't drink alcohol, but

985
00:51:40,320 --> 00:51:42,440
Speaker 3: I've been told by many friends of mine who do

986
00:51:43,200 --> 00:51:45,759
Speaker 3: that this once i've introduced them to this, that this

987
00:51:45,840 --> 00:51:48,160
Speaker 3: is a great mixer. That makes sense to me that

988
00:51:48,239 --> 00:51:50,160
Speaker 3: they go, you can make a cocktail with this. And

989
00:51:50,719 --> 00:51:56,520
Speaker 3: I've always said, if you were having a backyard cookout

990
00:51:56,760 --> 00:51:58,640
Speaker 3: and you had a cooler full of this stuff and

991
00:51:58,719 --> 00:52:03,120
Speaker 3: you this drink when cold on a hot day outside, oh,

992
00:52:03,160 --> 00:52:07,480
Speaker 3: it's I can speak from experience. It's a simple pleasure.

993
00:52:08,800 --> 00:52:10,280
Speaker 3: It's a true simple pleasure.

994
00:52:10,480 --> 00:52:15,040
Speaker 2: I think it's beyond simple. I think what they've done

995
00:52:15,040 --> 00:52:18,560
Speaker 2: here is a very complicated thing. You know, titans of

996
00:52:18,600 --> 00:52:22,040
Speaker 2: the soda industry can't nail flavors. So for whoever the

997
00:52:22,080 --> 00:52:25,480
Speaker 2: hell is making mister cucumber, this is no big operation.

998
00:52:25,640 --> 00:52:30,880
Speaker 2: This is some tiny little place in Pompano Beach, Florida.

999
00:52:30,960 --> 00:52:34,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's in Florida. They're in Pompano Beach. Now. I

1000
00:52:34,120 --> 00:52:36,800
Speaker 3: thought they were in winter Haven. But maybe they've moved.

1001
00:52:37,080 --> 00:52:39,359
Speaker 3: Maybe they've gotten bigger. No, it has to be because

1002
00:52:39,360 --> 00:52:43,640
Speaker 3: they've gotten bigger. But I am so happy to say this.

1003
00:52:44,000 --> 00:52:45,799
Speaker 3: I was worried you'd be underwhelmed.

1004
00:52:46,480 --> 00:52:48,560
Speaker 2: Well you did it. I mean you set it up

1005
00:52:48,560 --> 00:52:49,440
Speaker 2: in a bad way.

1006
00:52:50,040 --> 00:52:52,439
Speaker 3: You've got it, but you can see. I think it's

1007
00:52:52,480 --> 00:52:55,040
Speaker 3: fair to say. Is everyone going to say that it's

1008
00:52:55,080 --> 00:52:59,040
Speaker 3: the greatest drink on earth? No? But are you mad

1009
00:52:59,080 --> 00:53:00,759
Speaker 3: that I did? Are you now?

1010
00:53:00,880 --> 00:53:01,799
Speaker 2: Because it worked out?

1011
00:53:02,160 --> 00:53:05,720
Speaker 3: And because to some people I tasted this, I said

1012
00:53:06,320 --> 00:53:09,759
Speaker 3: this is my favorite drink, and I collect drinks, some

1013
00:53:09,800 --> 00:53:12,160
Speaker 3: people are going to say this is the top of

1014
00:53:12,160 --> 00:53:14,240
Speaker 3: the mountain. This is top. This is the Apex Predator

1015
00:53:14,280 --> 00:53:14,760
Speaker 3: of sodas.

1016
00:53:15,719 --> 00:53:18,200
Speaker 2: When you believe in something, you've got to just get

1017
00:53:18,200 --> 00:53:19,320
Speaker 2: behind it and believe.

1018
00:53:19,880 --> 00:53:21,799
Speaker 3: I have other sodas that I'd put in the very

1019
00:53:21,920 --> 00:53:26,839
Speaker 3: top tier along with this, right, but this. If there's

1020
00:53:26,920 --> 00:53:29,720
Speaker 3: one knock against it, it's that it's a newer company

1021
00:53:29,719 --> 00:53:32,800
Speaker 3: that doesn't have the rich history and tradition of American

1022
00:53:32,920 --> 00:53:36,400
Speaker 3: soda creation that I like. But then I also applaud

1023
00:53:36,440 --> 00:53:39,520
Speaker 3: them because I don't think it's easy to start a

1024
00:53:39,560 --> 00:53:43,560
Speaker 3: small bottling company in this era when it's so intimidating

1025
00:53:43,600 --> 00:53:47,040
Speaker 3: to not be on supermarket shelves. Oh yeah, where there's

1026
00:53:47,040 --> 00:53:50,880
Speaker 3: these monster brands that swallow everything else up. So kudos

1027
00:53:50,920 --> 00:53:54,800
Speaker 3: to the fine people in Pompano Beach who are making

1028
00:53:54,840 --> 00:53:56,640
Speaker 3: this happen. And may they never close.

1029
00:53:58,880 --> 00:54:01,399
Speaker 2: Chris, I think it's time to play a game.

1030
00:54:01,760 --> 00:54:02,560
Speaker 3: I'm into it.

1031
00:54:02,680 --> 00:54:04,400
Speaker 2: Do you want to play a game called Gift Master

1032
00:54:04,600 --> 00:54:06,480
Speaker 2: or a game called gift or a curse. I'll tell

1033
00:54:06,520 --> 00:54:08,400
Speaker 2: you how it works once we start.

1034
00:54:08,680 --> 00:54:10,200
Speaker 3: I like the phrase gift Master.

1035
00:54:10,840 --> 00:54:14,520
Speaker 2: Okay, I need a number between one and ten six. Okay,

1036
00:54:14,600 --> 00:54:17,200
Speaker 2: I have to do some light calculating while I'm doing this.

1037
00:54:17,560 --> 00:54:19,520
Speaker 2: I want you to promote. I want you to recommend.

1038
00:54:19,560 --> 00:54:21,040
Speaker 2: I want you to do whatever you want. You've got

1039
00:54:21,080 --> 00:54:23,080
Speaker 2: a new special you can talk about that. You can

1040
00:54:23,080 --> 00:54:24,759
Speaker 2: do whatever you want. You have the microphone. I'll be

1041
00:54:24,880 --> 00:54:25,239
Speaker 2: right back.

1042
00:54:25,600 --> 00:54:28,280
Speaker 3: I have a new special. It's called Half My Life.

1043
00:54:28,320 --> 00:54:33,000
Speaker 3: It's a stand up special hybrid with a road documentary.

1044
00:54:33,400 --> 00:54:36,920
Speaker 3: I filmed it at ten small venues all throughout the Northeast.

1045
00:54:36,960 --> 00:54:39,520
Speaker 3: I wanted it to really look and feel like comedy

1046
00:54:39,560 --> 00:54:42,440
Speaker 3: that's done in the trenches as I do it in

1047
00:54:42,480 --> 00:54:45,000
Speaker 3: real life on the road. It's got a lot of

1048
00:54:45,320 --> 00:54:49,120
Speaker 3: heart to it. It's got footage of me performing for

1049
00:54:49,239 --> 00:54:53,040
Speaker 3: alligators that a lot of people are telling me is insane.

1050
00:54:53,920 --> 00:54:56,040
Speaker 3: I was happy to do it. You can find it

1051
00:54:56,080 --> 00:54:58,840
Speaker 3: on iTunes and Amazon and Vimeo and a bunch of

1052
00:54:58,880 --> 00:55:03,040
Speaker 3: other places. And as that's coming out, I'm also one

1053
00:55:03,080 --> 00:55:04,719
Speaker 3: of the things I hope people like about it is

1054
00:55:04,760 --> 00:55:07,320
Speaker 3: it's a good reminder of how live performance was working

1055
00:55:07,320 --> 00:55:09,400
Speaker 3: in twenty nineteen when I filmed it. I hope it

1056
00:55:09,440 --> 00:55:11,960
Speaker 3: makes people excited to get back out there. And I

1057
00:55:12,000 --> 00:55:15,640
Speaker 3: actually have just announced a twenty city tour and all

1058
00:55:15,680 --> 00:55:18,920
Speaker 3: the tickets are available at Chrisgeth dot com. And then

1059
00:55:18,960 --> 00:55:21,479
Speaker 3: I have my beautiful anonymous podcast. I have a whole

1060
00:55:21,520 --> 00:55:24,000
Speaker 3: project called New Jersey is the World that's the celebration

1061
00:55:24,080 --> 00:55:26,319
Speaker 3: of New Jersey. It's a very small thing that New

1062
00:55:26,360 --> 00:55:29,080
Speaker 3: Jersey people are loving. But at this point I'm just

1063
00:55:29,120 --> 00:55:32,120
Speaker 3: watching you calculate and continue to plug projects. I've got

1064
00:55:32,160 --> 00:55:34,920
Speaker 3: an online platform called Planet Scum where myself and a

1065
00:55:35,000 --> 00:55:38,960
Speaker 3: number of other alt comedians I've been doing online shows

1066
00:55:38,960 --> 00:55:42,120
Speaker 3: throughout the pandemic and it's become a really strong community.

1067
00:55:44,000 --> 00:55:46,920
Speaker 3: I've written a couple a couple of books. I can.

1068
00:55:48,400 --> 00:55:50,040
Speaker 2: What else say, I've got it?

1069
00:55:50,120 --> 00:55:52,800
Speaker 3: Oh great, Because I was actually running out of things

1070
00:55:52,840 --> 00:55:53,480
Speaker 3: to plug.

1071
00:55:54,200 --> 00:55:56,040
Speaker 2: You could have just given your Venmo at that point.

1072
00:55:56,640 --> 00:55:58,319
Speaker 3: You know people would love that.

1073
00:56:01,400 --> 00:56:05,120
Speaker 2: Highly recommend Chris's News special. Everyone go watch it. Just

1074
00:56:05,160 --> 00:56:09,719
Speaker 2: find Chris. In general, everything Chris does is always unique

1075
00:56:09,760 --> 00:56:13,279
Speaker 2: and delightful and will make you feel good. So do that.

1076
00:56:13,320 --> 00:56:15,799
Speaker 2: But now we're going to play this game. Now, this

1077
00:56:15,840 --> 00:56:18,800
Speaker 2: is how gift master works. I'm going to name three gifts,

1078
00:56:18,840 --> 00:56:21,960
Speaker 2: three things you can give away, objects, experiences, this kind

1079
00:56:21,960 --> 00:56:24,000
Speaker 2: of thing. Then I'm going to name three famous people.

1080
00:56:24,320 --> 00:56:26,160
Speaker 2: You have to tell me which of the people you're

1081
00:56:26,160 --> 00:56:28,479
Speaker 2: going to give which gift and why does that make sense?

1082
00:56:28,560 --> 00:56:28,759
Speaker 4: Yeah?

1083
00:56:28,760 --> 00:56:31,760
Speaker 3: It does? Okay, Okay, I'll really focus.

1084
00:56:32,080 --> 00:56:34,400
Speaker 2: All right, You've got to focus here. The three gifts

1085
00:56:34,440 --> 00:56:41,880
Speaker 2: you'll be giving are legos, the blocks we build. Next

1086
00:56:41,960 --> 00:56:45,680
Speaker 2: up is an evening of uncontrolled passion, so that's more

1087
00:56:45,680 --> 00:56:48,920
Speaker 2: of an experience. And finally, a wet vac So a

1088
00:56:49,000 --> 00:56:52,399
Speaker 2: vacuum that does it all. Let's just say it does

1089
00:56:52,400 --> 00:56:54,960
Speaker 2: it all more. You know, it's kind of a professional's vacuum.

1090
00:56:55,040 --> 00:56:56,000
Speaker 3: I have one in my basement.

1091
00:56:56,600 --> 00:56:59,279
Speaker 2: Oh see, and that's great. If your basement floods, you're

1092
00:56:59,280 --> 00:57:02,360
Speaker 2: gonna want the wet vas Now you're going to be

1093
00:57:02,400 --> 00:57:07,080
Speaker 2: giving these two the following people, Brian Wilson, famously of

1094
00:57:07,120 --> 00:57:10,359
Speaker 2: the Beach Boys, Yes, one of our great songwriters. Then

1095
00:57:10,400 --> 00:57:16,360
Speaker 2: you'll be giving it to Seal, another musician. And finally,

1096
00:57:17,040 --> 00:57:21,240
Speaker 2: oh interesting, this is an all music gift master, because

1097
00:57:21,280 --> 00:57:24,560
Speaker 2: finally we've got Axel Rose. So we've got the entire

1098
00:57:24,640 --> 00:57:28,920
Speaker 2: spectrum of uh, you know this is We've got it

1099
00:57:28,960 --> 00:57:29,360
Speaker 2: all here.

1100
00:57:30,760 --> 00:57:34,480
Speaker 3: Okay, I think I know all my answers, let's hear it.

1101
00:57:34,680 --> 00:57:38,600
Speaker 3: I do have a logistical question in the night of Passion?

1102
00:57:38,880 --> 00:57:40,480
Speaker 3: Am I giving it to them in the sense that

1103
00:57:40,760 --> 00:57:41,320
Speaker 3: I am?

1104
00:57:42,840 --> 00:57:45,240
Speaker 2: That's up to you, Okay, that could be with another

1105
00:57:45,320 --> 00:57:47,919
Speaker 2: person that can be with themselves with you. I would

1106
00:57:47,960 --> 00:57:50,320
Speaker 2: like it to be with me, okay, perfectly, And that

1107
00:57:50,480 --> 00:57:56,040
Speaker 2: I think clearly. I think anybody knows right away this

1108
00:57:56,080 --> 00:57:57,160
Speaker 2: means I'm picking Seal.

1109
00:57:58,280 --> 00:58:02,600
Speaker 3: Of course I'm not. You know, I'm married to him.

1110
00:58:02,720 --> 00:58:04,760
Speaker 3: But I'm very cognizant of the fact that there's a

1111
00:58:04,760 --> 00:58:07,400
Speaker 3: spectrum that everybody lands on it. And I will say

1112
00:58:07,440 --> 00:58:11,840
Speaker 3: Seal is the type that I would I would experiment with.

1113
00:58:11,960 --> 00:58:17,040
Speaker 3: Seal is a beautiful person, an interesting soul, makes great music.

1114
00:58:17,880 --> 00:58:20,920
Speaker 3: I think, has a unique look, and I think is

1115
00:58:20,960 --> 00:58:23,480
Speaker 3: also not perfect, notoriously.

1116
00:58:23,160 --> 00:58:25,360
Speaker 2: Right, I'm not familiar.

1117
00:58:25,760 --> 00:58:28,439
Speaker 3: Well, I think Seal has. There's been sometimes where people

1118
00:58:28,480 --> 00:58:30,240
Speaker 3: have been mean to Seal because I believe he has

1119
00:58:30,280 --> 00:58:33,720
Speaker 3: some scars on his face, and there's been like viral

1120
00:58:33,760 --> 00:58:35,680
Speaker 3: stuff where people have made fun of him for that,

1121
00:58:35,720 --> 00:58:37,400
Speaker 3: and then other people have said, what are we doing?

1122
00:58:37,440 --> 00:58:39,480
Speaker 3: Why do we allow society to be this way? Let's

1123
00:58:39,520 --> 00:58:41,840
Speaker 3: get better. But I actually think that that makes him

1124
00:58:41,880 --> 00:58:42,760
Speaker 3: even more beautiful.

1125
00:58:43,080 --> 00:58:44,960
Speaker 2: Of course it's his trademark.

1126
00:58:45,160 --> 00:58:48,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I think that I think that perfection is

1127
00:58:48,920 --> 00:58:51,320
Speaker 3: not real in real life, and it's refreshing to see

1128
00:58:51,360 --> 00:58:54,560
Speaker 3: a celebrity own that, and I think it makes him

1129
00:58:55,200 --> 00:58:58,240
Speaker 3: more beautiful physically and spiritually in a way. So yeah,

1130
00:58:58,240 --> 00:58:59,760
Speaker 3: I would love to share a night of passion with

1131
00:58:59,760 --> 00:59:02,000
Speaker 3: Sea and see how it goes.

1132
00:59:02,040 --> 00:59:03,080
Speaker 2: We'd all be so lucky.

1133
00:59:03,200 --> 00:59:05,320
Speaker 3: I can't guarantee that it's going to be great, as

1134
00:59:05,360 --> 00:59:07,480
Speaker 3: it is an experiment on my part, but I'd love

1135
00:59:07,520 --> 00:59:10,400
Speaker 3: to give into that experiment and really please Seal. I'd

1136
00:59:10,440 --> 00:59:11,920
Speaker 3: love to give Seal everything he needs.

1137
00:59:13,760 --> 00:59:15,400
Speaker 2: Seal, if you're listening, yeah.

1138
00:59:15,320 --> 00:59:17,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I understand he is a fan. I understand

1139
00:59:17,960 --> 00:59:22,800
Speaker 3: he is a fan. I would like to give the

1140
00:59:22,920 --> 00:59:25,600
Speaker 3: WETVAC to Axel Rose because I grew up on guns

1141
00:59:25,600 --> 00:59:28,240
Speaker 3: and Roses. Being born in nineteen eighty that Ben was

1142
00:59:28,280 --> 00:59:30,920
Speaker 3: a huge deal to all of us on MTV, and

1143
00:59:30,960 --> 00:59:34,840
Speaker 3: we all know he really lives wild. I don't trust

1144
00:59:34,840 --> 00:59:38,960
Speaker 3: that he's totally on top of home maintenance. I imagine

1145
00:59:39,000 --> 00:59:41,760
Speaker 3: that at times he probably lets things go. That he's

1146
00:59:41,800 --> 00:59:43,920
Speaker 3: someone who would notice a problem and not solve it

1147
00:59:43,960 --> 00:59:48,920
Speaker 3: because he's, you know, whatever, substances or distractions. So I

1148
00:59:48,960 --> 00:59:51,479
Speaker 3: think he might need a wet BAC. And then I'll

1149
00:59:51,480 --> 00:59:54,880
Speaker 3: tell you. I saw Brian Wilson play live. It must

1150
00:59:54,880 --> 00:59:58,400
Speaker 3: have been about five years ago at the count Basie

1151
00:59:58,400 --> 01:00:00,120
Speaker 3: Theater in Red Bank, New Jersey.

1152
01:00:00,360 --> 01:00:01,040
Speaker 2: Oh wow.

1153
01:00:01,200 --> 01:00:03,080
Speaker 3: He played all of pet sounds and then he took

1154
01:00:03,080 --> 01:00:04,520
Speaker 3: a break, and then he did a bunch of Beach

1155
01:00:04,520 --> 01:00:08,160
Speaker 3: Boys greatest hits. It was an incredible show. His band

1156
01:00:09,160 --> 01:00:13,080
Speaker 3: brought the heat. I will tell you that anybody who's

1157
01:00:13,080 --> 01:00:14,840
Speaker 3: seen Brian Wilson in a recent memory, I bet would

1158
01:00:14,840 --> 01:00:17,440
Speaker 3: agree with me that it is it's a little concerning.

1159
01:00:18,240 --> 01:00:20,080
Speaker 3: It does feel a little bit like they sort of

1160
01:00:20,080 --> 01:00:23,360
Speaker 3: prop him up at a piano. He's not doing great physically, sure,

1161
01:00:24,040 --> 01:00:27,560
Speaker 3: so my thought might be that legos would actually be

1162
01:00:27,640 --> 01:00:30,400
Speaker 3: a really great thing for him to just stay focused

1163
01:00:30,440 --> 01:00:35,200
Speaker 3: on motor functions and use those muscles. So I think

1164
01:00:35,240 --> 01:00:38,160
Speaker 3: there is a really utilitarian need for that, So yeah,

1165
01:00:38,160 --> 01:00:40,840
Speaker 3: I would I think. I think Wilson gets the legos, axle,

1166
01:00:40,880 --> 01:00:43,200
Speaker 3: gets the wet back, and I get in the ring

1167
01:00:43,240 --> 01:00:46,479
Speaker 3: and do my damnedest to bring Ceil to the heights

1168
01:00:46,520 --> 01:00:47,840
Speaker 3: of ecstasy that he deserves.

1169
01:00:50,080 --> 01:00:51,760
Speaker 2: And I think Seal would do the same for you.

1170
01:00:52,080 --> 01:00:53,920
Speaker 3: I really do, don't you think Some don't.

1171
01:00:53,760 --> 01:00:58,040
Speaker 2: Think Seal is a generous man and would just get

1172
01:00:58,080 --> 01:01:00,040
Speaker 2: in there and you two would have the time of

1173
01:01:00,080 --> 01:01:00,640
Speaker 2: your lives.

1174
01:01:00,720 --> 01:01:03,320
Speaker 3: I also feel like he'd be very I think he

1175
01:01:03,360 --> 01:01:05,560
Speaker 3: would slice right through the awkwardness of what are the

1176
01:01:05,560 --> 01:01:07,520
Speaker 3: logistics of this going to be and what is our

1177
01:01:07,560 --> 01:01:10,680
Speaker 3: comfort level? Oh? Absolutely, not to get too graphic, but

1178
01:01:10,800 --> 01:01:12,760
Speaker 3: like in the position steal and I would be, and

1179
01:01:12,800 --> 01:01:15,120
Speaker 3: this would be an experiment. We'd have to have a

1180
01:01:15,160 --> 01:01:18,400
Speaker 3: frank conversation about do we want to take it to

1181
01:01:18,480 --> 01:01:21,000
Speaker 3: penetration level, who's going to top, who's going to bottom?

1182
01:01:21,040 --> 01:01:23,160
Speaker 3: Exactly where are we going to go with this? And

1183
01:01:23,200 --> 01:01:25,080
Speaker 3: I feel like it would be such a gentle and

1184
01:01:25,160 --> 01:01:27,800
Speaker 3: open and honest conversation that it would actually create more

1185
01:01:27,840 --> 01:01:30,600
Speaker 3: excitement than awkwardness.

1186
01:01:31,400 --> 01:01:35,360
Speaker 2: Beautifully done, Chris. That was thoughtful and you really got

1187
01:01:35,400 --> 01:01:37,080
Speaker 2: into the mind of each of these people in the

1188
01:01:37,280 --> 01:01:39,960
Speaker 2: personal lives. I feel like you nailed the gift giving

1189
01:01:40,040 --> 01:01:41,520
Speaker 2: there perfect.

1190
01:01:41,240 --> 01:01:43,240
Speaker 3: Thank you so much for giving me that chance, because

1191
01:01:44,400 --> 01:01:46,520
Speaker 3: I've been sitting in a hotel room, as I mentioned,

1192
01:01:46,520 --> 01:01:48,480
Speaker 3: with nothing to do, and I feel like, much in

1193
01:01:48,520 --> 01:01:51,360
Speaker 3: the same way the legos might allow Brian Wilson some

1194
01:01:53,160 --> 01:01:56,600
Speaker 3: needed muscle practicing, this has allowed me to have a

1195
01:01:56,640 --> 01:01:59,800
Speaker 3: human conversation in a way I really enjoy.

1196
01:02:00,520 --> 01:02:03,480
Speaker 2: Would you mind if we answer one listener question?

1197
01:02:03,600 --> 01:02:05,640
Speaker 3: Oh? I would? I mean, if we can only bring

1198
01:02:05,640 --> 01:02:08,280
Speaker 3: in one, then I deserve that person and answer how

1199
01:02:08,280 --> 01:02:09,160
Speaker 3: many did call get?

1200
01:02:09,200 --> 01:02:12,360
Speaker 2: You can be honest col and I did two did

1201
01:02:12,360 --> 01:02:19,720
Speaker 2: two listener questions. Double cal is always always one step ahead.

1202
01:02:19,920 --> 01:02:24,920
Speaker 3: Well, and look, my career is on a downward plane,

1203
01:02:24,960 --> 01:02:28,400
Speaker 3: and we all know calls is rising steadily. So of course,

1204
01:02:28,720 --> 01:02:30,200
Speaker 3: of course, of course, of course.

1205
01:02:32,080 --> 01:02:35,120
Speaker 2: Okay, this is called I said no emails. People write

1206
01:02:35,120 --> 01:02:37,680
Speaker 2: into I said no gifts at gmail dot com. Every

1207
01:02:37,680 --> 01:02:39,800
Speaker 2: one of them has a different question about gifts or

1208
01:02:39,840 --> 01:02:43,240
Speaker 2: experience this kind of thing. They're all the only common

1209
01:02:43,320 --> 01:02:45,880
Speaker 2: factor is they're desperate enough to write into this thing.

1210
01:02:46,200 --> 01:02:51,880
Speaker 2: Let's help somebody. Okay, this is hello bridger and disrespectful guest.

1211
01:02:52,040 --> 01:02:56,120
Speaker 2: That's referring to you. I recently put in, Just off

1212
01:02:56,160 --> 01:02:58,640
Speaker 2: the bat, I recently put in my two week notice

1213
01:02:58,640 --> 01:03:00,800
Speaker 2: at my job of three years, and I'm moving on

1214
01:03:00,920 --> 01:03:03,840
Speaker 2: to my dream job. The job i'm currently or that

1215
01:03:03,880 --> 01:03:07,040
Speaker 2: I'm leaving, was increasingly miserable as time went on. But

1216
01:03:07,120 --> 01:03:09,440
Speaker 2: I've had a wonderful coworker that has helped me get

1217
01:03:09,480 --> 01:03:12,600
Speaker 2: through the worst days. This coworker has kept me laughing,

1218
01:03:12,680 --> 01:03:15,600
Speaker 2: helped with big projects, and has even advised me through

1219
01:03:16,040 --> 01:03:18,840
Speaker 2: landing myself a pay raise. She's been a great mentor

1220
01:03:18,920 --> 01:03:21,200
Speaker 2: and a genuine friend. When I told her about the

1221
01:03:21,240 --> 01:03:23,240
Speaker 2: new job. She told me she was happy for me,

1222
01:03:23,280 --> 01:03:24,800
Speaker 2: but I can tell she's a little bummed that I

1223
01:03:24,840 --> 01:03:26,920
Speaker 2: would be leaving. I want to do something for her

1224
01:03:26,960 --> 01:03:30,120
Speaker 2: to show how thankful I am for her support and friendship.

1225
01:03:30,280 --> 01:03:32,440
Speaker 2: What should I do? That's from Kate, So just right

1226
01:03:32,480 --> 01:03:35,400
Speaker 2: off the bat, Kate has abandoned a coworker at a

1227
01:03:35,440 --> 01:03:40,880
Speaker 2: miserable job, kind of jumped. Ship has broke. You know this,

1228
01:03:41,120 --> 01:03:43,360
Speaker 2: Maybe the theme of this episode has broken trust, but

1229
01:03:44,320 --> 01:03:46,720
Speaker 2: that's what's happening in Kate's life, and she wants to

1230
01:03:47,360 --> 01:03:51,000
Speaker 2: give this coworker something to remember her by, maybe ease

1231
01:03:51,000 --> 01:03:52,400
Speaker 2: her pain at this horrible job.

1232
01:03:53,120 --> 01:03:56,560
Speaker 3: My immediate instinct is that this should be something experience

1233
01:03:56,640 --> 01:04:02,560
Speaker 3: based rather than facing right because this person is feeling stress, boredom,

1234
01:04:03,080 --> 01:04:07,360
Speaker 3: or like this job is burning them out mentally, physically,

1235
01:04:07,360 --> 01:04:12,400
Speaker 3: whatever it is. Maybe an experience would work best depending

1236
01:04:12,440 --> 01:04:14,480
Speaker 3: on your region. Like if it was in New York,

1237
01:04:14,520 --> 01:04:16,920
Speaker 3: I'd say get this person up to the cat Skills,

1238
01:04:17,320 --> 01:04:19,160
Speaker 3: get them on to one of these lovely little art

1239
01:04:19,200 --> 01:04:21,959
Speaker 3: towns and the cat skills, give them a weekend there,

1240
01:04:22,560 --> 01:04:25,440
Speaker 3: and let's make sure there's a massage involved.

1241
01:04:25,640 --> 01:04:27,840
Speaker 2: Let's make sure it's gotta be a massage.

1242
01:04:27,480 --> 01:04:31,160
Speaker 3: Maybe a sauna, you know, and maybe something as simple

1243
01:04:31,200 --> 01:04:33,919
Speaker 3: as that, some sort of spa based getaway, but something

1244
01:04:34,000 --> 01:04:37,560
Speaker 3: gets them out of their usual environment in the sense of,

1245
01:04:37,560 --> 01:04:39,320
Speaker 3: if they're in a city, get them into the woods.

1246
01:04:39,320 --> 01:04:41,360
Speaker 3: If they're in the woods, send them down to the city.

1247
01:04:42,160 --> 01:04:44,480
Speaker 3: Help flip the script for this person, because you know what,

1248
01:04:44,520 --> 01:04:47,920
Speaker 3: you're moving on to something totally new and it's breaking

1249
01:04:47,960 --> 01:04:49,960
Speaker 3: their heart a little bit. So give them something new

1250
01:04:50,040 --> 01:04:54,320
Speaker 3: in their experience, and then, you know, maybe maybe cap

1251
01:04:54,360 --> 01:05:00,280
Speaker 3: it off with a cameo from it, you know, from

1252
01:05:00,440 --> 01:05:04,440
Speaker 3: the boss, like a professional wrestler, maybe Meg Stalter, you know,

1253
01:05:04,600 --> 01:05:06,919
Speaker 3: like one of the what are the people on there?

1254
01:05:07,680 --> 01:05:11,480
Speaker 2: Your favorite ninety day fiance star? You know, yes, some

1255
01:05:11,880 --> 01:05:15,160
Speaker 2: person who's kind of has found their way to fame

1256
01:05:15,200 --> 01:05:17,720
Speaker 2: in the worst way possible and is now in need

1257
01:05:17,760 --> 01:05:20,520
Speaker 2: of fifteen hours to record themselves on I bet Mace.

1258
01:05:20,640 --> 01:05:22,760
Speaker 3: I bet Mace who used to do songs with Puffy.

1259
01:05:22,760 --> 01:05:24,800
Speaker 3: I bet he's on happened to Mace? I bet he's

1260
01:05:24,800 --> 01:05:25,320
Speaker 3: on cameo.

1261
01:05:25,760 --> 01:05:28,840
Speaker 2: He has to be if he's anywhere, he's on cameo.

1262
01:05:29,040 --> 01:05:30,920
Speaker 3: All out of the whack Pack from Howard Stern is

1263
01:05:30,960 --> 01:05:33,360
Speaker 3: on cameo, Go get a cameo from high pitched Eric.

1264
01:05:35,800 --> 01:05:39,240
Speaker 3: Top of us spa weekend in a high pitch Eric cameo.

1265
01:05:41,600 --> 01:05:45,439
Speaker 3: I adore that idea. I think that's perfect. I don't

1266
01:05:45,480 --> 01:05:47,720
Speaker 3: even have anything to say. I mean, if that's too

1267
01:05:47,800 --> 01:05:49,880
Speaker 3: much money for you, send in a massage therapist to

1268
01:05:49,920 --> 01:05:54,840
Speaker 3: the office, give a massage and uh, you know they

1269
01:05:54,920 --> 01:05:56,880
Speaker 3: suddenly they're the talk of the office and might just

1270
01:05:56,920 --> 01:05:59,360
Speaker 3: create some inter office drama that they have to deal

1271
01:05:59,400 --> 01:06:01,720
Speaker 3: with them will take their mind off of you. I'm

1272
01:06:01,760 --> 01:06:04,320
Speaker 3: receiving word from our producer that Mace is not on cameo.

1273
01:06:04,400 --> 01:06:08,919
Speaker 3: I'm shocked on a Lisa saying, can we start a campaign. Look,

1274
01:06:09,000 --> 01:06:11,160
Speaker 3: that's up to the listener. At this point.

1275
01:06:12,000 --> 01:06:14,320
Speaker 2: The listener I am, of course speaking of, is Puff

1276
01:06:14,400 --> 01:06:19,440
Speaker 2: Daddy Puffy reach out to Mace. I'm sure it's your

1277
01:06:19,520 --> 01:06:21,200
Speaker 2: last time you heard from him was nineteen ninety eight.

1278
01:06:22,040 --> 01:06:24,880
Speaker 2: You did great things together. Get him on cameo. I'm

1279
01:06:24,880 --> 01:06:26,120
Speaker 2: sure Mace needs the money.

1280
01:06:26,240 --> 01:06:28,000
Speaker 3: And if Mace is listening, I would say I would

1281
01:06:28,040 --> 01:06:30,640
Speaker 3: pay anywhere up to forty dollars for a cameo from you.

1282
01:06:31,120 --> 01:06:35,440
Speaker 2: But look, Kate, you've received your answer. Chris has proved

1283
01:06:35,440 --> 01:06:38,320
Speaker 2: through gift Master knows exactly what people need and what

1284
01:06:38,360 --> 01:06:42,320
Speaker 2: they want. This is what your coworker needs. Maybe get

1285
01:06:42,360 --> 01:06:44,800
Speaker 2: them a lock it with your picture and move on.

1286
01:06:45,080 --> 01:06:47,120
Speaker 2: Move on to the new job and leave the old

1287
01:06:47,200 --> 01:06:51,760
Speaker 2: job behind. Chris, I've just had a fantastic time. I've learned,

1288
01:06:52,240 --> 01:06:57,440
Speaker 2: I've enjoyed. We've talked about soda for probably forty five minutes.

1289
01:06:57,480 --> 01:06:58,480
Speaker 3: I'm so sorry to.

1290
01:07:00,160 --> 01:07:03,800
Speaker 2: There's nothing to apologize a number of unsubscribes.

1291
01:07:03,840 --> 01:07:05,640
Speaker 3: I just cost I apologize.

1292
01:07:06,320 --> 01:07:09,840
Speaker 2: People are just streaming over to Apple podcasts one star

1293
01:07:09,920 --> 01:07:12,200
Speaker 2: review after one star review. Yes, they are out to

1294
01:07:12,200 --> 01:07:13,120
Speaker 2: destroy both of us.

1295
01:07:14,200 --> 01:07:14,880
Speaker 3: I deserve it.

1296
01:07:17,440 --> 01:07:21,120
Speaker 2: No, the listener is also opening the gift bag with

1297
01:07:21,160 --> 01:07:24,040
Speaker 2: me here, and we always get a fun surprise and

1298
01:07:24,080 --> 01:07:27,520
Speaker 2: that's kind of the joy of life. And if you

1299
01:07:27,560 --> 01:07:31,880
Speaker 2: can't deal with the joy of surprise, then find another podcast.

1300
01:07:32,040 --> 01:07:33,680
Speaker 2: That's what I'm going to say. This is tough love

1301
01:07:34,520 --> 01:07:39,240
Speaker 2: and people need it. People need to be told. But Chris,

1302
01:07:39,280 --> 01:07:42,120
Speaker 2: I hope that you can, you know, make it through

1303
01:07:42,120 --> 01:07:45,080
Speaker 2: your final few days there without snapping. But if you

1304
01:07:45,360 --> 01:07:47,560
Speaker 2: do snap, at least I got the scoop.

1305
01:07:47,880 --> 01:07:51,080
Speaker 3: Thank you so much for your well wishes and happy

1306
01:07:51,080 --> 01:07:52,440
Speaker 3: to provide that exclusive.

1307
01:07:54,320 --> 01:07:57,400
Speaker 2: All right, bless you and listener. Time to move on,

1308
01:07:58,000 --> 01:08:02,120
Speaker 2: Time to turn off the podcast and do something wholesome,

1309
01:08:02,840 --> 01:08:10,040
Speaker 2: have a wonderful day. I said, No Gifts is an

1310
01:08:10,080 --> 01:08:14,959
Speaker 2: exactly right production. It's produced and engineered by our dear

1311
01:08:15,040 --> 01:08:18,839
Speaker 2: friend Anna Lisa Nelson, and the theme song is by miracle

1312
01:08:18,880 --> 01:08:23,439
Speaker 2: worker Amy Mann. You must follow the show on Instagram

1313
01:08:23,479 --> 01:08:26,760
Speaker 2: at I said No Gifts, that's where you're going to

1314
01:08:26,800 --> 01:08:30,000
Speaker 2: see pictures of all these wonderful gifts I'm getting. You

1315
01:08:30,120 --> 01:08:34,880
Speaker 2: have to see the gifts. Listen and subscribe on Apple Podcasts,

1316
01:08:34,920 --> 01:08:38,400
Speaker 2: Stitcher or wherever you found me. And why not leave

1317
01:08:38,439 --> 01:08:41,559
Speaker 2: a review while you're there. It's really the least you

1318
01:08:41,560 --> 01:08:45,040
Speaker 2: could do, considering everything I do for you. And if

1319
01:08:45,040 --> 01:08:48,360
Speaker 2: you're interested in advertising on the show, go to midrool

1320
01:08:48,520 --> 01:08:55,800
Speaker 2: dot com slash adsvit.

1321
01:08:52,960 --> 01:09:00,639
Speaker 1: Did you hear Funa man? Myself perfectly clear? But you're

1322
01:09:00,760 --> 01:09:06,720
Speaker 1: a guess to my home. You gotta come to me empty,

1323
01:09:07,120 --> 01:09:12,839
Speaker 1: And I said, no, guess. Your own presence is presents

1324
01:09:13,120 --> 01:09:18,720
Speaker 1: enough that I already had too much stuff, So how

1325
01:09:18,800 --> 01:09:19,679
Speaker 1: do you dare

1326
01:09:19,840 --> 01:09:21,439
Speaker 3: To surbey me