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Speaker 1: Welcome to Decisions Decisions. I don't think you should say

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Speaker 1: decision Decisions. It sounded like you was talking to Kirsty.

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Speaker 1: You definitely say to welcome, Welcome to the new podcast.

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Speaker 1: Oh wait, you want to say together Decisions Decisions. Hey guys,

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Speaker 1: welcome to another episode of Decisions Decisions. I'm your girl,

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Speaker 1: Mandy v aka Full corporuns Akad Beach. Hey, everybody, welcome

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Speaker 1: back to another episode. My name is Weezy and per usual.

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Speaker 1: You can go get our book, No Holds Bart. If

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Speaker 1: you don't have it already, you are really missing out, Beach.

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Speaker 1: I really don't like when people are left out. It's

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Speaker 1: like people that didn't watch Love Island and all that shit.

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Speaker 1: I'm one of them, and I don't want you to

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Speaker 1: be one of those that I haven't read our book yet,

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Speaker 1: So go and order No Holds Bard is out now,

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Speaker 1: that's right. Don't beat on people that got so much.

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Speaker 1: Some motherfuckers say because you watch a little clip, a

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Speaker 1: little thirty seconds, a little sixty seconds or something and

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Speaker 1: don't check out the whole thing, that's what you doing

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Speaker 1: on the internet. And I know by now you've seen

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Speaker 1: all these clips about our goddamn book. Do not comment

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Speaker 1: unless you've broad the whole thing. Poor Fayever, Okay, she

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Speaker 1: only said that because you're here, we want to make

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Speaker 1: you feel included, Like we just said what I can't say,

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Speaker 1: poor paper, your favorite nicker, Nick ker Awan. I guess

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Speaker 1: we're gonna start with a little ketchup or whatever. It's

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Speaker 1: crazy because I notice is the decisions decisions now, and

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Speaker 1: I don't want us to get like bleeped too much

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Speaker 1: on the YouTube. So therefore, if you don't want to

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Speaker 1: hear the bleeps that's about to come, go ahead and

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Speaker 1: subscribe to our patreon where is bleep free puts the

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Speaker 1: whole or what You could try to tell this story

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Speaker 1: without saying I like that. I mean she just said, Dick,

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Speaker 1: do you think they bleeped out there? Yes? It isn't

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Speaker 1: that an anatomical or saying thirteen version, like call it

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Speaker 1: banana the banana plant? Ye say stuff like that. And

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Speaker 1: when me and him were hunching, say stuff like that,

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Speaker 1: you think we can say hunching, hunch hudget is corraze. Okay,

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Speaker 1: so I'm gonna make it. By the way, it's already

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Speaker 1: gonna sound like it's coming from an old bitch or

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Speaker 1: an old woman. I'm sorry, look at me. I don't

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Speaker 1: want to get the bleeps going. Okay, it sounds like

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Speaker 1: it's you're gonna hear why because I'm embarrassed to share

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Speaker 1: this story, but I'm finna share it with y'all. Oh

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Speaker 1: my god, No, even worse, even worse, even worse. First off,

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Speaker 1: not y'all guessing about the goddamn egg plant story. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So anyways, if you guys have been on the Patreon,

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Speaker 1: you would have known, like the backstory, I'm back single,

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Speaker 1: so I'm back dating outside, going back in the rolodecks,

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Speaker 1: and so basically boomed. Let me tell y'all what happened.

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Speaker 1: So I ended up double back into somebody that this

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Speaker 1: is so bad too pre pandemic. We ended up hanging

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Speaker 1: out try to hook up. We were both so lit.

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Speaker 1: He didn't get up, and so normally I don't give

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Speaker 1: someone second chances with that. There's a few guys I've

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Speaker 1: talked about on the pod where that's happened, and it's like, well,

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Speaker 1: we didn't fuck because it didn't get hard, right. So anyways,

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Speaker 1: we just kind of kept following each other on Instagram.

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Speaker 1: We haven't done anything. Anyways. I was lit the other night,

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Speaker 1: and he happens to live in Atlanta. So I was

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Speaker 1: lit the other night, coming from like my homeboy game night.

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Speaker 1: When I say lit lit, we was playing some game.

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Speaker 1: I don't even was it Tunuk. It might've been tungk

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Speaker 1: and you would just had to drink. Anyways, I was lit.

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Speaker 1: So it's two o'clock in the morning. You hear me

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Speaker 1: two o'clock in the morning. I say, come over because

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Speaker 1: I look at his story and he outside, So I

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Speaker 1: hit him up, like, come over, mind you we've never

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Speaker 1: had sex. He's like dead ass. I'm like, yeah, the

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Speaker 1: dead ass response is crazy. Now did you ever feel

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Speaker 1: it coming? Did I feel it coming for him? None

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Speaker 1: of Yeah, because you're like, we never had tags. No,

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Speaker 1: he good looking, He very good looking. He also about

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Speaker 1: to have a nickname on the five and y'all about

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Speaker 1: to hear it goes deeper into the story. So anyways,

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Speaker 1: so it's two o'clock in the morning, he's like dead ass.

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Speaker 1: He's like, yeah, I'm calling on uber now. I said

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Speaker 1: me too this one. But just can't have homeboys just live. No, no, no,

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Speaker 1: he wasn't my homeboy because we clearly tried two fuck

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Speaker 1: years ago. It just didn't get up and I didn't

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Speaker 1: really give him a second chance. So what did you

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Speaker 1: do right after you didn't give him the second chance?

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Speaker 1: He was just like, okay, never mind. This was pre

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Speaker 1: pandemic and we didn't live in the same city anyways,

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Speaker 1: like I was living in New York. Prepandem. It said

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Speaker 1: pre pandemic, as if that's the like it was. It

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Speaker 1: was pre predom. We technically didn't fuck because resep body

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Speaker 1: counts after prepend Oh baby, I got three. I'm good,

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Speaker 1: so three. I mean I had a relationship, then the

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Speaker 1: the basketball nigga I went to every time me and

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Speaker 1: him broke up, and then my new boyfriend ex boyfriend.

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Speaker 1: Now I don't know. Oh yeah St Croix, none of

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Speaker 1: the only niggas you fuck? Remember I went celibate, Yes

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Speaker 1: you did, and then I stopped fucking. Twenty four to seven,

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Speaker 1: Oh so I can add twenty four seven five five

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Speaker 1: penises in five years is not bad? That is it's

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Speaker 1: a dick of year. Whoa, I'm proud of my not

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Speaker 1: a dick of year. You know what's crazy? I actually

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Speaker 1: feel like that can't be right.

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Speaker 2: I thought I'm going to be office with you. I

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Speaker 2: don't think so either, Yo. No, is that fin shir

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Speaker 2: been going on a little too well for you?

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Speaker 1: Don't yo? I was in a three year relationship. I

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Speaker 1: mean okay, there was mad girls. Let me do girls

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Speaker 1: on count I mean no, not really, I'm talking about

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Speaker 1: the insertion per penis. Okay, wait, broll I have five

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Speaker 1: and five year old accounts because twenty twenty the only

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Speaker 1: way she likes to cobadd Then the nigga was cheating

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Speaker 1: on him with Lambeau b d Oh Lambo too. None

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Speaker 1: of no Lambo was prepende, No Lampo was after pandemic.

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Speaker 1: Lambo was after o bay All right, Oh, you ain't

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Speaker 1: even too many? The nigga got cheated on him with

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Speaker 1: b d d Lambbo Netflix, Netflix, Netflix. The skater niggam,

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Speaker 1: I can't mind, man, you already do. I'm at five

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Speaker 1: and then you're men and now you're man. Oh and

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Speaker 1: the two niggas you cheated on obay with Oh my,

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Speaker 1: what I count I'm like seven, old bab That don't

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Speaker 1: sound right either? Sound first? Got we counted this to

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Speaker 1: share a dick story is crazy? Like your nigga, you

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Speaker 1: ain't fucking nobody was no the one? What do you

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Speaker 1: see what I mean. I don't like this, you know,

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Speaker 1: like what I'm saying, she's over. You're trying when William

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Speaker 1: and that's why he got mad at the one dude

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Speaker 1: that I used to go to and you know him,

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Speaker 1: that's that's him. I just feel like mine don't count

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Speaker 1: how girl because she lost because she had more dis

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Speaker 1: than I did. I've been more conservative. You know, it's

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Speaker 1: gonna be getting hold on. You know what's even more crazy?

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Speaker 1: People about to hop in the comments like wait, what

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Speaker 1: about this guy a mathematics They about to go back

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Speaker 1: and be like, in this episode you said no, that

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Speaker 1: was it. That was it for me too, Damn why

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Speaker 1: would you do it? Okay, you know you know what's crazy?

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Speaker 1: This actually might lead to one of the variables for

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Speaker 1: this story that I'm telling. So anyways, the story, I'm

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Speaker 1: all scared, okay, so let me get back to my story.

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Speaker 1: So anyways, I was horny. Clearly he was outside, so

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Speaker 1: I said come over. He said, dead ass, He said yeah,

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Speaker 1: didn't really waste no time wasted like none. So he

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Speaker 1: walks in. So he walks in. We go straight to

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Speaker 1: my bar and do another shot. Because you've been out.

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Speaker 1: I've been lit. Let's do another shot, given though the

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Speaker 1: first So we do a shot, even though the first time,

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Speaker 1: you know this was dumble me good yeah, good point.

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Speaker 1: And he was so lit the last time. We both

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Speaker 1: were lit, but literally couldn't get up. Maybe he was nervous,

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Speaker 1: Maybe it was a liquor. I don't know. All I

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Speaker 1: know is this time I think maybe he went and

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Speaker 1: got surgery. It came out. He was hard. We started

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Speaker 1: kissing in the dining room, said let's go upstairs. We

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Speaker 1: get upstairs, and this is how you know I was.

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Speaker 1: I was ready. I had already the condomns under the

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Speaker 1: pillow and the loop like. He was just right ready.

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Speaker 1: I knew I wanted some dick. So he pulls it

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Speaker 1: out as short, isn't there what? No, I don't I

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Speaker 1: I set up. I set it up. I was like, oh,

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Speaker 1: mab with this thove. So he he takes it out

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Speaker 1: and I get ready to put it in my mouth,

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Speaker 1: and it is ginormous. It Oh no, but it is

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Speaker 1: ginormous with a hook. And when I tell you like like,

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Speaker 1: so his dick is probably like this, like it might

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Speaker 1: be the size of my whole arm. What's crazy? Someone's

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Speaker 1: gonna know he were talking about because you think someone

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Speaker 1: that dick has a hook, No, bitch on that thing

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Speaker 1: like left right his name on the show about to

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Speaker 1: be Captain Hooks. It's not an uppercut, it's a hook. Bitch,

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Speaker 1: Are you gonna fuck him again? So we've already fucked

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Speaker 1: three times and this is where the story's gone. So anyways,

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Speaker 1: we fucked that night and bitch, I know, I'm y'all's queen. Ooh, baby,

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Speaker 1: I ran about forty We just experienced a heat wave

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Speaker 1: in New York City and during our downtime, me and

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Speaker 1: Eden county three more dicks than this, bitch, fuck continue

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Speaker 1: the story, Captain hook Ricks, Oh, I got, y'all, hook,

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Speaker 1: I forgot that. Okay, wait, can I be like the

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Speaker 1: how to men be? Do sex workers really count sax?

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Speaker 1: Short Friends and nigga from Texas? Three different states? Okay?

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Speaker 1: First off, the fellow shoall was like all up in

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Speaker 1: my pussy and you know what he didn't say during hill?

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Speaker 1: What's it be down down? AnyWho? Okay, so back to

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Speaker 1: the story, So boom, he go to fuck me, and baby,

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Speaker 1: I cannot take that dig for nothing, and I'm like,

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Speaker 1: this isn't normal. It's the hood. Hold on, it's even

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Speaker 1: it gets deeper than this, because I'm like, mind, you

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Speaker 1: were loved up. So I'm like, okay, maybe it's because

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Speaker 1: you know, I haven't fucked in a while. I broke

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Speaker 1: up with my with my boyfriend. It's been like a

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Speaker 1: month and a half. You know. The pussy done came

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Speaker 1: back and so I was like, maybe that's it. So gray,

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Speaker 1: it was so good. I ran that thing back the

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Speaker 1: next day, hold on any daytime. Literally during his lunch break,

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Speaker 1: bitch ran that thing back again. So he came in again.

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Speaker 1: Bitch came into girl put it in me, and I

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Speaker 1: was running again. So let me tell you how big

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Speaker 1: this thing is. Let me tell you now. The hook

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Speaker 1: is a variable. The amount of time it took me

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Speaker 1: to have sex is another variable. Y'all want to know

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Speaker 1: what another variable is? What's variable? I ain't starting. I

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Speaker 1: don't know the other variable yet. Because I decided that

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Speaker 1: maybe something is anatomically wrong with me. His his penis

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Speaker 1: went so deep into me and I couldn't take it

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Speaker 1: so good. I said, you gotta be a fibrarate. I

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Speaker 1: need to go to a doctor. I literally, in my

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Speaker 1: old ass mine said, bitch, you don't wrong from dick.

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Speaker 1: It's gotta be something like something a right down there

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Speaker 1: that she was running. So here we go where you

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Speaker 1: did you go? Well? No, we want a thirst time?

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Speaker 1: Oh what did I take that dick like a motherfucker?

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Speaker 1: Pro So? Maybe I think I said so, maybe it

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Speaker 1: was a time that I was you know, you have

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Speaker 1: a cycle and within your pms, apparently you're you're you're

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Speaker 1: more sensitive at certain times than not like e'sag Smith.

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Speaker 1: There's a whole lot of things that could have been.

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Speaker 1: I am going to get some doctor though, because I

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Speaker 1: don't like not being able to take dick. But anyways,

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Speaker 1: so that happens, and it's so good, I start to

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Speaker 1: be like, so need that again? I have a question

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Speaker 1: for the men because now I'm confused. We're having a

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Speaker 1: great time having sex, it's going well, we've only fucked

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Speaker 1: three times, and he says that he feels like meat,

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Speaker 1: and I need to know how to not make him

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Speaker 1: feel that way. Although I remember how anyone that attended

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Speaker 1: our last Horrible Decisions tour, what show me the text

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Speaker 1: of you asking what the meat? Or ask him for

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Speaker 1: the wait, ask him for it? I need to see

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Speaker 1: why he said, like, how did you say the way

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Speaker 1: he used to text twenty four to seven, you up

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Speaker 1: gang or he said that no, no, no, we something like that.

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Speaker 1: That's crazy. You know what's aught so crazy about you

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Speaker 1: saying this about how I talk? So hit him the

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Speaker 1: other day because we've been talking about like Michelin restaurants

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Speaker 1: and stuff, and I went to one yesterday, so I

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Speaker 1: called him. I was like, ooh, go into this cote.

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Speaker 1: I love cot so Coke, So went there and So

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Speaker 1: called him and was like and when I called him,

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Speaker 1: he answered, like, what's up, babe? Not the B word

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Speaker 1: with three insertions, and I kind of let us slide.

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Speaker 1: And I don't know that if I hear it again,

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Speaker 1: if I'm gonna have to like, hey, brou calm down

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Speaker 1: with that problem. Okay, first off, to be called babe,

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Speaker 1: I'm the only three insertions and this is any start

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Speaker 1: a clip of this. So I made that love I

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Speaker 1: Love Island joke today because I just started it because

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Speaker 1: everybody's watching it. Okay. Brionda actually hung up on me

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Speaker 1: a few days ago for the watch You're not watching

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Speaker 1: Levine that I can't talk to you and hung up.

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Speaker 1: She's like, ditch, I need to talk like I'm not I

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Speaker 1: need to talk about that, and I can't tell you. Okay,

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Speaker 1: I'm also dubbed me in text. So I started watching

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Speaker 1: it and there's a scene where this dude chooses a

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Speaker 1: girl as his number one, which means they now share

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Speaker 1: a bed together, and they're coupled in the villain Okay,

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Speaker 1: his name is Ace, her name is Amaya, and he goes, look,

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Speaker 1: I just want you to know even though I chose you,

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Speaker 1: like he's, oh, I'm not watching it, but apparently they

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Speaker 1: came out of thing. Okay, okay, But anyway he said

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Speaker 1: to this girl, he said, yeah, like I'm with someone else.

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Speaker 1: She goes, okay, fine. Next day she's like, I mean,

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Speaker 1: damn babe, and he goes, I don't really like that either.

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Speaker 1: She's like what He's like, Yeah, like the cuddling, like

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Speaker 1: the extra tonal, like the pet name. She's like, okay,

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Speaker 1: so you don't. I can't say babe either. And at

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Speaker 1: this point I'm really feeling her because I'm like, yo,

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Speaker 1: don't tell me you like me or you fuck with me,

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Speaker 1: and I can't say that. I can't say fucking babe.

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Speaker 1: Do worth off? He just he inserted in me three times. Cool,

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Speaker 1: We're cool. A minute mark. You could say no, no, no, no

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Speaker 1: to me. Three assertions doesn't mean that. Now there's the

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Speaker 1: pet names going on. Not call you by your first year. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I mean he he doesn't say like that. But Yn

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Speaker 1: actually told me once he was like, you call everybody

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Speaker 1: bab Yeah, but you know what's crazy, he didn't call

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Speaker 1: me babe before he inserted he answered the phone, what's

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Speaker 1: that babe? Like that, just like that, I am not

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Speaker 1: your babe. I'm not your babe. Restaurants because we finish,

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Speaker 1: go and eat. Because he don't want to feel like meat,

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Speaker 1: so I'm gonna let him feed me some other meat

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Speaker 1: besides his meat. So you calling him and telling about stuff, right,

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Speaker 1: because you are doing no. But that's the thing. But

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Speaker 1: since before pandemic, we still maintained where we talked. We

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Speaker 1: send each other meets, we text like we do all

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Speaker 1: that ship. When I moved to Atlanta, Like I told

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Speaker 1: him about my favorite sushi restaurant, he told me about

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Speaker 1: Like we still have conversations. You don't like him, you

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Speaker 1: know what's crazy? He cool, He's very he's very handsome.

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Speaker 1: Me my type with a big old dick, good job

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Speaker 1: six five good Yeah, Like it's cute, and she said

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Speaker 1: a year out, but I don't. I don't want a

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Speaker 1: relationship right now. That's fair, but he can't call you

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Speaker 1: be okay, getting deeper. Let me tell you what really happened.

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Speaker 1: Hold on, because why not? Let me tell you what.

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Speaker 1: So we went on a date. This is before I

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Speaker 1: got with Active Bay. So we went on a date.

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Speaker 1: It was cool. He ghosted me, I swear to god.

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Speaker 1: He doesn't think he did, but I felt ghost you.

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Speaker 1: So literally, after he fucked the ship out of me,

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Speaker 1: I said, damn, you ghost to me, nigga. So he's like, wait,

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Speaker 1: what he fucked the ship out of you recently? And

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Speaker 1: then I brought up damn nigga, and you ghosted me

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Speaker 1: and I still gave you some pussy, which is crazy anyway,

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Speaker 1: So you So then I got a boyfriend and so

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Speaker 1: it didn't I got a boyfriend, so it didn't matter.

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Speaker 1: So he's like, okay, I'll tell you why, just not

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Speaker 1: right now because we laid up. I'm probably ruining the mood.

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Speaker 1: So he tells you you ready, yes, tell the nigga.

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Speaker 1: I ain't want kids, oh exactly, and so in his mind,

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Speaker 1: hold on, So we have this whole conversation because he

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Speaker 1: liked me, and then I said, yeah, fuck them kids

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Speaker 1: on a date and he's like, he's my age, so

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Speaker 1: he wants kids. This was after fuck one. We've now

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Speaker 1: fucked three times. I like to think my pussy is

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Speaker 1: that good. He now was like, well, maybe I don't

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Speaker 1: need kids, and he called me babe. I feel like

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Speaker 1: he's liking me, and whoa. Yeah. Well this was to

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Speaker 1: go with ghosting, but we did an episode with trash Tuesday.

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Speaker 1: We loved. I loved the cutie for Duties. Actually, Alex

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Speaker 1: has been trying to get us to go. I want

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Speaker 1: to go back for years. I will go back on

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Speaker 1: their show. Love them like and I don't say that

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Speaker 1: about many people, especially white people. When I tell you

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Speaker 1: I would go on their show once a month I

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Speaker 1: was there. I love them. They're from one of us

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Speaker 1: back before the episode. I love them. If y'all go

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00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:12,119
Speaker 1: check it out, it's out if you're on our Patreon.

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Speaker 1: I posted it trash Tuesday shout out to them if

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Speaker 1: oh my god, white girl us so because girl, we

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Speaker 1: were saying nigga with them, but they didn't say it back,

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Speaker 1: which I appreciated. Wait, Mandy, why would they say that

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Speaker 1: they would. But if they did say, well, no they

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Speaker 1: did say that, which one do you think it's said? No,

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Speaker 1: I'm not gonna say that because these are them date guys.

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Speaker 1: One was dating an Asian and the other dates white guys. Right,

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Speaker 1: she didn't Sam and allow Brown. I like Saman's nah,

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Speaker 1: you damn. I want to know what I will say.

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Speaker 1: I will say, I will say and though on them

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Speaker 1: them them islanders, there's they're probably the most respective in

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Speaker 1: terms of not having to say nigga. Like y'all saw

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Speaker 1: the mexicanot said, nigga can say what they grow up

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Speaker 1: around their own tribe. So I don't feel like they

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Speaker 1: need to say the innovatric cle on Trappa because you

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Speaker 1: know what it is. Here's the thing she asked the

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Speaker 1: question people like why you ain't check you There's some

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Speaker 1: moments where you're just like, I'm gonna let you sit

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Speaker 1: in your dumb yep. I felt that from h just like,

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Speaker 1: but yeah, I don't think any of them want to

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Speaker 1: said it anyway, don't check it out, you're gonna do

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Speaker 1: about it. What did we talk about on tray Shuesday?

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Speaker 1: We talked about something like this ghosting and ghosting. I

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00:19:27,359 --> 00:19:29,479
Speaker 1: don't think ghosting is okay, and you and the girls

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00:19:29,480 --> 00:19:33,159
Speaker 1: were like, no, I go feeling it. Yeah, and so

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Speaker 1: he did, and I'm not I actually think the ghosting

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Speaker 1: is the most appropriate in terms of, like of what

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Speaker 1: I'm saying for a reason. I actually he had a reason.

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Speaker 1: I understand he had a reason. He literally they really

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Speaker 1: can't go past this at all. And he literally said

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Speaker 1: that to me. So after the date, which you well wait,

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Speaker 1: which I thought was great, right, the date was great.

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Speaker 1: So when it kind of went nowhere and I stopped

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Speaker 1: hearing from him and then I got a boyfriend, it

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Speaker 1: didn't matter. But now how that he fucked me and

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00:20:01,200 --> 00:20:03,560
Speaker 1: it was good? Now I was like, damn, Now, I

360
00:20:03,560 --> 00:20:05,040
Speaker 1: want to know why the fuck you ghost to me?

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00:20:05,880 --> 00:20:08,119
Speaker 1: And it was because he's digging you down and he

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Speaker 1: is taking me down. Question, then what is the fine

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Speaker 1: line between distancing and ghosting? No? No, no, we were

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00:20:14,480 --> 00:20:17,960
Speaker 1: we were texting, talking like it was on a date. Shut.

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Speaker 1: Literally it was like a shut immediately, Oh no more Texas,

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Speaker 1: no more calls, no faith, no more reaction. And that

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00:20:24,680 --> 00:20:26,840
Speaker 1: went like even on my Instagram and then guess what

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00:20:26,880 --> 00:20:31,400
Speaker 1: he started reacting to you my flowers. I got sent

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Speaker 1: by my nigga, the sushi that he bought me when

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Speaker 1: I went to La. All the posts about me having

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Speaker 1: a nigga is the ones he would kind of like

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Speaker 1: corny double tap, like big big six five cornball. I

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Speaker 1: don't know. I didn't mind it, but that's where he

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Speaker 1: was like, you got into a relationship, you know, he

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00:20:47,119 --> 00:20:49,680
Speaker 1: was like, my ship, Well, you know what it is.

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Speaker 1: It's very passive aggressive it is. It's a very passive.

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Speaker 1: I don't think so. Bro. If a bitch did that

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00:20:55,760 --> 00:20:58,960
Speaker 1: to a nigga, that's corny. You know, I'm glad you

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Speaker 1: found somebody. I even told him when we started talking

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Speaker 1: about the kids, I said, no, if you want to

381
00:21:03,520 --> 00:21:06,119
Speaker 1: go have kids, you could still be in search of

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Speaker 1: baby mama. Who's telling everybody? Why why can't I tell man?

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00:21:09,640 --> 00:21:11,160
Speaker 1: If they want to have kids, go ad them. You're

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00:21:11,160 --> 00:21:13,480
Speaker 1: just not gonna have them with me. I don't see

385
00:21:13,520 --> 00:21:16,040
Speaker 1: nothing wrong with that. There's something really wrong. I don't

386
00:21:16,040 --> 00:21:19,000
Speaker 1: know how we're supposed to navigate this non traditional life

387
00:21:19,160 --> 00:21:22,960
Speaker 1: without new ways of introducing solutions to FOP. Because the

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00:21:23,000 --> 00:21:27,120
Speaker 1: truth is, if someone wants children and you don't, they shouldn't.

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Speaker 1: You shouldn't be dating long term well, who's to say

390
00:21:31,760 --> 00:21:35,520
Speaker 1: what long is? It's subjective. The reason I say that,

391
00:21:36,320 --> 00:21:38,160
Speaker 1: it's like who we date a year is someone who

392
00:21:38,200 --> 00:21:39,680
Speaker 1: we date for two years? Like what is law? I

393
00:21:39,760 --> 00:21:42,040
Speaker 1: think even dating for two years, that's kind of I

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00:21:42,040 --> 00:21:43,720
Speaker 1: think two years. And here's why I say that. And

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Speaker 1: this is no shade to you. I want you to

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Speaker 1: meet I'm sure a man that's in alignment. Well yeah

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00:21:48,760 --> 00:21:50,240
Speaker 1: he might be an alnight now he said he don't

398
00:21:50,240 --> 00:21:53,240
Speaker 1: old kids, no vote. I mean I didn't ask real

399
00:21:53,600 --> 00:21:55,360
Speaker 1: so to me, the reason I think it shouldn't happen

400
00:21:55,480 --> 00:21:58,840
Speaker 1: is because one you start doing shit, no one needs

401
00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:01,240
Speaker 1: this extra headache in their life. For example, you're a

402
00:22:01,240 --> 00:22:03,520
Speaker 1: woman that's saying, go out there, do your thing where

403
00:22:03,560 --> 00:22:06,520
Speaker 1: that's gracious of you. Now it's another fucking headache in

404
00:22:06,560 --> 00:22:09,520
Speaker 1: your life because now this nigga has to take time

405
00:22:09,800 --> 00:22:11,840
Speaker 1: from away from you to go be with this children.

406
00:22:11,880 --> 00:22:13,520
Speaker 1: Then you're gonna have the baby mama headache. Then there's

407
00:22:13,520 --> 00:22:15,520
Speaker 1: a new energy in their life. Then that kid is

408
00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:18,520
Speaker 1: somehow now surrounding your life. Now you're the fucking bitch

409
00:22:18,840 --> 00:22:21,480
Speaker 1: for saying, hey, well I don't want to wrap your son,

410
00:22:21,560 --> 00:22:23,399
Speaker 1: come on vacation. I have a kid, and you're like,

411
00:22:23,440 --> 00:22:25,399
Speaker 1: what the fuck it was supposed to I didn't want kids.

412
00:22:25,520 --> 00:22:28,199
Speaker 1: It like brings it into your life and it's bringing

413
00:22:28,200 --> 00:22:30,760
Speaker 1: you shit you don't want or need. So I can't

414
00:22:30,760 --> 00:22:33,719
Speaker 1: even date niggas with kids, then, I think. I mean,

415
00:22:34,480 --> 00:22:36,280
Speaker 1: but based on what she even said, that's what I'm

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Speaker 1: g if you don't want to child like, if you

417
00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:40,600
Speaker 1: don't want to handle that, if you don't want children

418
00:22:40,640 --> 00:22:44,560
Speaker 1: around your seer in your life. Nah, So what you're

419
00:22:44,600 --> 00:22:48,880
Speaker 1: telling me is that the date deadbeats no? Well no,

420
00:22:48,920 --> 00:22:51,600
Speaker 1: because if you're saying no, so I like, I have

421
00:22:51,920 --> 00:22:54,040
Speaker 1: off of other friends that don't want children. So what

422
00:22:54,119 --> 00:22:56,200
Speaker 1: you say, as crazy as people act like you are,

423
00:22:56,760 --> 00:22:59,199
Speaker 1: this is not a crazy fucking thing to me at all. No,

424
00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:01,960
Speaker 1: I got crazy men and women. I don't want kids,

425
00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:04,760
Speaker 1: understand that. So I do. Wait, what you're saying is

426
00:23:04,800 --> 00:23:07,760
Speaker 1: that I can't based off even someone wanting them in

427
00:23:07,800 --> 00:23:10,760
Speaker 1: the future. Would you say that, as a woman not

428
00:23:10,880 --> 00:23:13,520
Speaker 1: wanting kids, that I also shouldn't date a man that

429
00:23:13,600 --> 00:23:15,520
Speaker 1: already has kids because what about the men that have

430
00:23:15,640 --> 00:23:19,120
Speaker 1: kids and don't want any more? Respectfully? Oh, I mean

431
00:23:19,320 --> 00:23:22,000
Speaker 1: that's what I'm That's what I'm asked sactfully, respectfully, you

432
00:23:22,040 --> 00:23:24,160
Speaker 1: don't want to be kids at all? Well, maybe they're

433
00:23:24,160 --> 00:23:28,040
Speaker 1: teenagers by now, if there's an age, Like I say

434
00:23:28,119 --> 00:23:32,520
Speaker 1: respectfully because I don't want to say it, like you

435
00:23:32,720 --> 00:23:35,919
Speaker 1: don't like children, but they do seem bothersome to you

436
00:23:35,960 --> 00:23:39,399
Speaker 1: sometimes babies, So yeah, but I wouldn't date with a

437
00:23:39,440 --> 00:23:41,440
Speaker 1: newborn baby. What about like a seven year old, I

438
00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:43,560
Speaker 1: wouldn't mind a seven year old, bro, I'll be around

439
00:23:43,600 --> 00:23:47,200
Speaker 1: my homegirls with kids, So like, I'm not that disgusted

440
00:23:47,359 --> 00:23:50,600
Speaker 1: and like I hate kids so goddamn much. I like,

441
00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:53,560
Speaker 1: I like exaggerations, don't I feel if it was long

442
00:23:53,680 --> 00:23:56,240
Speaker 1: term and that kid is with his dad half the week,

443
00:23:57,320 --> 00:23:59,160
Speaker 1: oh yeah, that probably wouldn't work for me. But that's

444
00:23:59,200 --> 00:24:03,119
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. But that a good dad someone's playing

445
00:24:03,119 --> 00:24:05,439
Speaker 1: custody doesn't mess necessarily making them a good dad. They

446
00:24:05,480 --> 00:24:07,359
Speaker 1: probably did it so they have to pay more child support.

447
00:24:07,520 --> 00:24:10,240
Speaker 1: Well let's just say that. Chances are you chose a

448
00:24:10,240 --> 00:24:12,159
Speaker 1: good partner, and a good man is gonna want to

449
00:24:12,160 --> 00:24:14,159
Speaker 1: show up if they wanted to be in their child's

450
00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:18,760
Speaker 1: life half the week. How would that make you feel? Subjective?

451
00:24:18,920 --> 00:24:21,399
Speaker 1: You know, it depends how good the dick is how

452
00:24:21,440 --> 00:24:24,320
Speaker 1: much money he has, how great he looks. I don't

453
00:24:24,320 --> 00:24:27,600
Speaker 1: think I mean I've dated guys with kids before though

454
00:24:28,600 --> 00:24:32,760
Speaker 1: long term. No, I have a data of many people

455
00:24:32,800 --> 00:24:37,600
Speaker 1: long ter. Yeah, I don't think you should go because

456
00:24:38,640 --> 00:24:41,720
Speaker 1: I don't like this, because I get what she means though,

457
00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:44,119
Speaker 1: and it's not a headache for Mandy though I know

458
00:24:44,160 --> 00:24:46,240
Speaker 1: you're coming from good intentions at the end of the day.

459
00:24:46,280 --> 00:24:49,000
Speaker 2: Realistically, even if it's short for her, long term, it

460
00:24:49,080 --> 00:24:49,959
Speaker 2: might be messing with him.

461
00:24:50,040 --> 00:24:53,640
Speaker 1: Like guys sound like I'm being picky or nasty when

462
00:24:53,640 --> 00:24:55,280
Speaker 1: I'm saying, don't date a guy with kids, And I

463
00:24:55,320 --> 00:24:58,560
Speaker 1: genuinely think if I didn't want something for my life,

464
00:24:58,920 --> 00:25:02,320
Speaker 1: I'm not surely better. Yeah, I don't think it's because

465
00:25:02,320 --> 00:25:06,520
Speaker 1: then it's just really actually is a friend. No, it's

466
00:25:06,520 --> 00:25:09,560
Speaker 1: not even that it's crazy because I guess I come

467
00:25:09,600 --> 00:25:12,520
Speaker 1: from And again that's why maybe even hit it toward

468
00:25:12,800 --> 00:25:16,399
Speaker 1: the quote unquote deadbeat daddy right, Like I grew up

469
00:25:16,400 --> 00:25:21,840
Speaker 1: in a single parent household. My dad saw us maybe

470
00:25:22,040 --> 00:25:25,440
Speaker 1: once a month, and sometimes the girlfriend was with him,

471
00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:30,600
Speaker 1: sometimes they weren't, but we didn't infiltrate his life at all.

472
00:25:29,480 --> 00:25:32,639
Speaker 1: As what it seems, right, and a lot of my

473
00:25:32,720 --> 00:25:37,040
Speaker 1: friends currently are fucking single mothers. Guess who. They have

474
00:25:37,240 --> 00:25:40,720
Speaker 1: almost zero contact with zero help even financially from their

475
00:25:40,760 --> 00:25:43,560
Speaker 1: baby daddies. So there are a lot of people with

476
00:25:43,760 --> 00:25:50,359
Speaker 1: kids who, especially men, but especially Menia Williamson. Right, what

477
00:25:50,480 --> 00:25:53,600
Speaker 1: don't truly make you feel good? You're not talking about Zion,

478
00:25:54,560 --> 00:25:56,640
Speaker 1: Zion a fat nigga that No, No, you're not talking about Zion.

479
00:25:56,640 --> 00:26:00,680
Speaker 1: You're talking about Zarah. And then he there's a guy

480
00:26:00,840 --> 00:26:03,240
Speaker 1: that had kids with a woman and he's like paying

481
00:26:03,320 --> 00:26:08,560
Speaker 1: not to Anthony Edwards. Look, she confusing the basketball player. No,

482
00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:11,439
Speaker 1: that's Anthony Edwards, she says, Zion whatever that guy right?

483
00:26:11,640 --> 00:26:14,720
Speaker 2: Why she confused it though? Why because didn't Zion also

484
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:15,240
Speaker 2: have a kid?

485
00:26:15,320 --> 00:26:19,240
Speaker 1: No, Zion was fucking with a prostitute. Oh like put

486
00:26:19,280 --> 00:26:21,800
Speaker 1: him on Black Gossip of the City. Whatever she is.

487
00:26:21,840 --> 00:26:27,960
Speaker 1: I don't know. The BBL hosts are like the Anthony no, oh, sorry,

488
00:26:27,960 --> 00:26:29,320
Speaker 1: because you know he could. I don't even want to

489
00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:31,720
Speaker 1: put it. No, if that's your friend, don't be putting.

490
00:26:32,160 --> 00:26:34,080
Speaker 1: They might not be true on it. It's just his

491
00:26:34,160 --> 00:26:36,600
Speaker 1: ex girlfriend like wild out, but it might not be true.

492
00:26:37,760 --> 00:26:40,320
Speaker 1: She's on TikTok saying how much you should be asking

493
00:26:40,359 --> 00:26:45,720
Speaker 1: for Anthony Edwards, right, Anthony Edwards. Okay, so I was

494
00:26:45,720 --> 00:26:49,040
Speaker 1: gonna say a deadbut dad. Right, Yes, let's just say

495
00:26:49,040 --> 00:26:51,720
Speaker 1: you dated a guy that washed his hands with those children. Yeah,

496
00:26:52,480 --> 00:26:56,199
Speaker 1: you in this book talk about how a ship my

497
00:26:56,240 --> 00:26:58,600
Speaker 1: own daddy is yep, now knowing how the effect of

498
00:26:58,640 --> 00:27:02,080
Speaker 1: those things, knowing how fucked up was, to date a

499
00:27:02,119 --> 00:27:05,080
Speaker 1: man that's now having that same action, I mean, but

500
00:27:05,160 --> 00:27:08,119
Speaker 1: that's so again, And that's why I said it was subjective.

501
00:27:08,200 --> 00:27:10,600
Speaker 1: Like to me, I've also said that I know a

502
00:27:10,640 --> 00:27:12,320
Speaker 1: man could be a great partner and probably not a

503
00:27:12,320 --> 00:27:15,000
Speaker 1: great father or vice versa. There's really good fathers that

504
00:27:15,040 --> 00:27:17,320
Speaker 1: aren't great partner. But would you want to date a

505
00:27:17,359 --> 00:27:20,240
Speaker 1: man that wasn't good to children but the children? So

506
00:27:20,480 --> 00:27:23,760
Speaker 1: that's what I'm saying. Being good to children again is

507
00:27:23,760 --> 00:27:25,840
Speaker 1: subjective because you could be a good father, not a

508
00:27:25,880 --> 00:27:29,320
Speaker 1: good partner. And unfortunately, because I also I'm friends with

509
00:27:29,359 --> 00:27:32,160
Speaker 1: a lot of people who are single parents, I also

510
00:27:32,240 --> 00:27:36,760
Speaker 1: know that it's not necessarily always just the relationship between

511
00:27:36,960 --> 00:27:39,240
Speaker 1: a parent and a child, because you have another adult

512
00:27:39,320 --> 00:27:42,400
Speaker 1: in there that infiltrates maybe how much you can see

513
00:27:42,440 --> 00:27:45,280
Speaker 1: them or or makes it difficult. So that's why I said,

514
00:27:45,320 --> 00:27:47,520
Speaker 1: I don't want to generalize this topic because there are

515
00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:50,880
Speaker 1: a lot of nuances to being a single parent or

516
00:27:50,920 --> 00:27:53,240
Speaker 1: a nigga being a deadbeat dad. There just is. What

517
00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:55,159
Speaker 1: I'm saying is though, do it unless the kid was

518
00:27:55,200 --> 00:27:57,480
Speaker 1: older and the baby mama got a new call. But

519
00:27:57,680 --> 00:28:00,280
Speaker 1: that's even if they're older, they still end up like

520
00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:03,400
Speaker 1: a child with the trauma of not having their child around.

521
00:28:03,400 --> 00:28:06,240
Speaker 1: So I don't even think age matters. I think, but

522
00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:09,080
Speaker 1: I also have talked two men who had kids at

523
00:28:09,119 --> 00:28:12,960
Speaker 1: a very early age seventeen eighteen, had them in college,

524
00:28:13,200 --> 00:28:15,800
Speaker 1: and now they're in their thirties. So to me, I mean, again,

525
00:28:16,080 --> 00:28:18,840
Speaker 1: there's nuance to it. I would be okay dating a

526
00:28:18,880 --> 00:28:22,480
Speaker 1: guy with kids? Are you? I think? Are you watching

527
00:28:22,520 --> 00:28:27,439
Speaker 1: ann just like that? No? Okay, terrible first episode. I

528
00:28:27,440 --> 00:28:29,040
Speaker 1: thought it was a parody, and everyone knows how much

529
00:28:29,080 --> 00:28:34,600
Speaker 1: I love Sex and the City. Fucking dumb. However, this season,

530
00:28:35,080 --> 00:28:38,040
Speaker 1: Aiden and Carrie decide to get back together. Okay, right,

531
00:28:38,160 --> 00:28:41,200
Speaker 1: they're in the fifties or whatever they're in. Aiden's son

532
00:28:41,480 --> 00:28:45,440
Speaker 1: is acting out, who's like twelve? Okay, he tells Carrie, listen,

533
00:28:45,520 --> 00:28:47,320
Speaker 1: we're gonna be together, but I need to be there

534
00:28:47,320 --> 00:28:49,800
Speaker 1: for my kid right now. Okay, I think I need

535
00:28:49,800 --> 00:28:53,440
Speaker 1: to be with him for another five years. Okay, Carrie

536
00:28:53,440 --> 00:28:55,360
Speaker 1: and him decide to split ways. He moves to Virginia.

537
00:28:55,400 --> 00:28:56,840
Speaker 1: She's in New York. She's in a relationship with him.

538
00:28:56,840 --> 00:28:59,080
Speaker 1: They bought a house together. Okay, everybody, all of her

539
00:28:59,080 --> 00:29:03,040
Speaker 1: friends think this is crazy, right, And Carrie's feeling very

540
00:29:03,040 --> 00:29:04,800
Speaker 1: alone because he's got to tend to his children. Blah

541
00:29:04,800 --> 00:29:08,320
Speaker 1: blah blah. This last episode I watched, she goes to Virginia.

542
00:29:08,560 --> 00:29:11,920
Speaker 1: He tries to integrate her with his children. They're a mess.

543
00:29:12,080 --> 00:29:14,640
Speaker 1: He's throwing shit out the window. Fuck you mom, total

544
00:29:14,640 --> 00:29:17,320
Speaker 1: white kid shit and my homegirl. I get on the phone,

545
00:29:17,400 --> 00:29:21,120
Speaker 1: she goes, this was exactly what the world needed to see.

546
00:29:21,120 --> 00:29:23,400
Speaker 1: And I wish Black America could see this, because all

547
00:29:23,440 --> 00:29:26,840
Speaker 1: we see is a black single woman with her children

548
00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:29,760
Speaker 1: causing a man a headache. And now you get to

549
00:29:29,760 --> 00:29:33,400
Speaker 1: see a woman who decided to have no kids. Bam,

550
00:29:33,760 --> 00:29:36,400
Speaker 1: and your fuck shit in your world. And now I'm

551
00:29:36,440 --> 00:29:38,160
Speaker 1: excited to watch the rest of the season because I'm like,

552
00:29:38,800 --> 00:29:41,480
Speaker 1: Carrie should leave. I'm not gonna lie because I just

553
00:29:41,560 --> 00:29:44,680
Speaker 1: need It's our baggage, not everybody's children. Are baggage them

554
00:29:44,640 --> 00:29:47,840
Speaker 1: a little fuck ass motherfuckers, dawn, little boys baggage and

555
00:29:47,880 --> 00:29:50,280
Speaker 1: his baggage to the point where now I can't be

556
00:29:50,320 --> 00:29:54,320
Speaker 1: a priority. Now I can't be a part of this world.

557
00:29:54,560 --> 00:29:58,560
Speaker 1: For example, another thing, get to a city in Europe.

558
00:29:58,600 --> 00:30:00,840
Speaker 1: I don't want to say what city, but my man's

559
00:30:00,880 --> 00:30:05,000
Speaker 1: homeboys around and he's got a kid, he has a

560
00:30:05,040 --> 00:30:07,640
Speaker 1: girl come visit. I'm talking to the ditch at the

561
00:30:07,640 --> 00:30:12,640
Speaker 1: bar with my homegirl and the dude was basically, uh,

562
00:30:12,720 --> 00:30:14,040
Speaker 1: you know, he's only in time for a little bit

563
00:30:14,080 --> 00:30:17,720
Speaker 1: of time. And a girl's like oh. I was like, yeah,

564
00:30:17,760 --> 00:30:20,160
Speaker 1: he's so sweet, like he's getting back to his sons,

565
00:30:20,240 --> 00:30:22,760
Speaker 1: Like this is so cute. And she was like, yeah,

566
00:30:22,800 --> 00:30:26,160
Speaker 1: I can't be number two to nobody and they kids.

567
00:30:26,560 --> 00:30:30,480
Speaker 1: My homegirl and I looking like, oh no, my homegirl says,

568
00:30:30,520 --> 00:30:32,640
Speaker 1: shout out to a cute so why are you dating

569
00:30:32,640 --> 00:30:34,120
Speaker 1: a man with kids? She goes like, I guess I

570
00:30:34,160 --> 00:30:37,520
Speaker 1: probably shouldn't. I'm just having fun, but I'm never showing

571
00:30:37,560 --> 00:30:41,200
Speaker 1: up the number two, So that's that's problematic. So when

572
00:30:41,240 --> 00:30:45,000
Speaker 1: she walks away, me and my homegirl like, why would

573
00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:49,120
Speaker 1: you even say something like that to y'all? To your

574
00:30:49,200 --> 00:30:53,120
Speaker 1: man's he's with his friend, his girlfriend. Now you know,

575
00:30:53,400 --> 00:30:55,320
Speaker 1: I know you're gonna repeat this. Why would you tell

576
00:30:55,320 --> 00:30:57,719
Speaker 1: a man to their face, I'm never coming number two

577
00:30:57,760 --> 00:31:00,880
Speaker 1: to your kids? So now you're literally dating someone saying

578
00:31:01,040 --> 00:31:05,200
Speaker 1: what out not gonna happen? Your sons are number two

579
00:31:05,200 --> 00:31:07,080
Speaker 1: to mind you A man saying that to a woman

580
00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:10,520
Speaker 1: would be just like you don't say that kids come first.

581
00:31:10,840 --> 00:31:16,120
Speaker 1: I think, though I've called this my superpower in previous episodes,

582
00:31:17,280 --> 00:31:22,240
Speaker 1: I think compartmentalizing is my superpower, and it could be

583
00:31:22,360 --> 00:31:24,680
Speaker 1: to a fault, right Like, I know there's gonna be

584
00:31:24,680 --> 00:31:26,720
Speaker 1: people in the comments like, oh my gosh, she clearly

585
00:31:26,760 --> 00:31:29,480
Speaker 1: needs therapy. But I said it, and I'll say it again.

586
00:31:29,720 --> 00:31:32,480
Speaker 1: I don't believe in things lasting forever, and I think

587
00:31:32,520 --> 00:31:35,640
Speaker 1: that in ways that I genuinely know, I can't show up.

588
00:31:36,120 --> 00:31:38,600
Speaker 1: I have to be willing to walk away or have

589
00:31:38,640 --> 00:31:41,200
Speaker 1: someone walk away from me, which is why when I

590
00:31:41,280 --> 00:31:44,760
Speaker 1: laid down with Captain Hook, because it was good and

591
00:31:44,800 --> 00:31:47,240
Speaker 1: I wanted again, I wanted to know where that happened.

592
00:31:47,280 --> 00:31:49,200
Speaker 1: And when he said, oh, because you said you didn't

593
00:31:49,240 --> 00:31:53,880
Speaker 1: want kids, okay, well I'll be here until you go

594
00:31:53,920 --> 00:31:56,520
Speaker 1: find someone to have them with like, but that's not

595
00:31:56,560 --> 00:31:59,240
Speaker 1: what I want, literally, dead ass, you know to me

596
00:31:59,440 --> 00:32:05,720
Speaker 1: saying that, why, because I feel like that almost lives

597
00:32:05,760 --> 00:32:09,880
Speaker 1: in the same language of so why married ben Chichi

598
00:32:09,920 --> 00:32:12,840
Speaker 1: better chapter? It's the thing of getting more and deserving better?

599
00:32:13,000 --> 00:32:14,840
Speaker 1: Are you fucking kidding me? Why would someone? Well? Right now,

600
00:32:14,880 --> 00:32:17,280
Speaker 1: I'm just well, right now, I'm just I don't feel

601
00:32:17,280 --> 00:32:20,200
Speaker 1: like I'm getting you. I want the dick. I want

602
00:32:20,240 --> 00:32:22,960
Speaker 1: the dick. It's really good. I enjoy his company and

603
00:32:23,040 --> 00:32:25,960
Speaker 1: so for now it works for me and I'm getting

604
00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:28,720
Speaker 1: exactly what I want to Well, to me, I don't

605
00:32:28,720 --> 00:32:30,840
Speaker 1: want a relationship right now. I just got out of

606
00:32:30,880 --> 00:32:34,880
Speaker 1: one bitch. I haven't been home longer than fucking like

607
00:32:35,000 --> 00:32:37,000
Speaker 1: even the third time I just fucked him. It was

608
00:32:37,040 --> 00:32:39,840
Speaker 1: because I decided to change my flight so I could

609
00:32:39,840 --> 00:32:41,800
Speaker 1: sleep in my bed and not have to rush straight

610
00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:43,960
Speaker 1: to Okay. See, so I was like, ooh, no, I

611
00:32:44,000 --> 00:32:46,320
Speaker 1: wasn't supposed to be here, but I'm here for eleven

612
00:32:46,360 --> 00:32:48,880
Speaker 1: hours if you want to come over, like to me,

613
00:32:49,440 --> 00:32:52,040
Speaker 1: it works right now, So to me, where now he

614
00:32:52,120 --> 00:32:54,200
Speaker 1: has to make the decision. Big if you're starting to

615
00:32:54,280 --> 00:32:57,000
Speaker 1: like me, but you know you want family planning and

616
00:32:57,040 --> 00:32:58,960
Speaker 1: I can't give you that. That's to be his decision

617
00:32:59,000 --> 00:33:01,040
Speaker 1: to stop fucking with me. Right now, I'm getting exactly

618
00:33:01,040 --> 00:33:04,000
Speaker 1: what I want. But it feels good now that I'm

619
00:33:04,040 --> 00:33:08,560
Speaker 1: not running. But like, to me, I'm not wasting my time.

620
00:33:08,600 --> 00:33:12,040
Speaker 1: If he's wasting his time, that's on him. He has

621
00:33:12,080 --> 00:33:14,240
Speaker 1: to plan his own life for me right now, though

622
00:33:14,320 --> 00:33:16,320
Speaker 1: what I want is exactly what I'm getting out of him,

623
00:33:16,320 --> 00:33:20,640
Speaker 1: and I like it. If you want friends with benefits, shit, sure, great,

624
00:33:21,080 --> 00:33:23,400
Speaker 1: I think that's the best thing. And then the only

625
00:33:23,440 --> 00:33:26,440
Speaker 1: thing that can suck is like the more that we

626
00:33:26,560 --> 00:33:30,240
Speaker 1: start to grow connections with people, like, let's just say,

627
00:33:30,280 --> 00:33:32,640
Speaker 1: you really start feeling this niggat, let's say, because it's

628
00:33:32,720 --> 00:33:35,880
Speaker 1: very possible, I think he would be the most unfair

629
00:33:35,920 --> 00:33:38,640
Speaker 1: one because he's telling you I'm good. I said I

630
00:33:38,640 --> 00:33:40,720
Speaker 1: didn't need a kid like you said that I'm still

631
00:33:40,800 --> 00:33:44,000
Speaker 1: dating you. It's like the pressure back and forth. That's

632
00:33:44,040 --> 00:33:47,280
Speaker 1: why I don't think it's fair or safe to say

633
00:33:48,000 --> 00:33:51,920
Speaker 1: date me, go up kids with someone else, because that's

634
00:33:52,000 --> 00:33:54,280
Speaker 1: still well no, so even me saying that we had

635
00:33:54,280 --> 00:33:59,880
Speaker 1: a deeper conversation, right, I don't want kids. We're fucking

636
00:34:00,360 --> 00:34:03,640
Speaker 1: I know that we're fucking with protections. So I'm not

637
00:34:03,680 --> 00:34:05,760
Speaker 1: even asking him if there's anyone else he's fucking. I

638
00:34:05,800 --> 00:34:10,080
Speaker 1: don't think we're there yet. But when I say, when

639
00:34:10,120 --> 00:34:13,200
Speaker 1: you're ready to go have kids, go find someone. To me,

640
00:34:13,320 --> 00:34:16,160
Speaker 1: that's me letting him know when he gets to a

641
00:34:16,200 --> 00:34:19,319
Speaker 1: place where he wants something, I don't even want him

642
00:34:19,320 --> 00:34:21,640
Speaker 1: to think he can apply any pressure to make me

643
00:34:21,719 --> 00:34:23,920
Speaker 1: change my mind or make me feel like I have

644
00:34:23,920 --> 00:34:25,279
Speaker 1: to show up in a way that I've already said

645
00:34:25,640 --> 00:34:28,040
Speaker 1: I'm not going to. I think when we date people

646
00:34:28,239 --> 00:34:30,960
Speaker 1: with intention or not because of yes, we'll deal with

647
00:34:30,960 --> 00:34:33,680
Speaker 1: people and then fall into feelings, we get digmatized, we

648
00:34:33,719 --> 00:34:35,880
Speaker 1: think that we just want of friends with benefits relationship,

649
00:34:35,920 --> 00:34:38,160
Speaker 1: and then it's like, oh my god, you coming over

650
00:34:38,160 --> 00:34:39,920
Speaker 1: every day. Now I'm cooking for you, Now I like you.

651
00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:43,960
Speaker 1: All of those things, Yes, they happen, but I'm very

652
00:34:44,000 --> 00:34:47,080
Speaker 1: clear about that, and so to me, if he is

653
00:34:47,160 --> 00:34:49,120
Speaker 1: this grown ass man at the age of thirty five

654
00:34:50,400 --> 00:34:54,040
Speaker 1: really wants to have kids before it's too late, I'm

655
00:34:54,080 --> 00:34:57,600
Speaker 1: fine with him saying, Yo, you're not able to give

656
00:34:57,600 --> 00:34:59,000
Speaker 1: me what I need right now. I need to go

657
00:34:59,040 --> 00:35:03,200
Speaker 1: get that. I might cry not it too, but I'm okay.

658
00:35:03,239 --> 00:35:05,239
Speaker 1: With that, and I think that that's the thing, like

659
00:35:05,360 --> 00:35:08,520
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna try to be somebody that I'm not

660
00:35:08,680 --> 00:35:11,080
Speaker 1: that I don't want to be that, And I think

661
00:35:11,080 --> 00:35:12,960
Speaker 1: that we have to put that same onus on the man,

662
00:35:13,600 --> 00:35:15,480
Speaker 1: like a lot of us show up in ways that

663
00:35:16,239 --> 00:35:18,520
Speaker 1: we don't want to for the sake of a man often.

664
00:35:19,040 --> 00:35:20,759
Speaker 1: And so if that's what he's doing with me, I

665
00:35:20,760 --> 00:35:22,359
Speaker 1: hope he's not because I want him to be true

666
00:35:22,360 --> 00:35:25,799
Speaker 1: to himself. That's gonna be his job to step away

667
00:35:25,840 --> 00:35:28,960
Speaker 1: from me, and for me, it's not to push away

668
00:35:29,000 --> 00:35:31,239
Speaker 1: in no good dick, bitch, I'm sorry, I'm gonna keep

669
00:35:31,280 --> 00:35:33,080
Speaker 1: getting a good dick. So you feel we almost don't

670
00:35:33,120 --> 00:35:34,600
Speaker 1: want you to go eat with this nigga, just keep

671
00:35:34,640 --> 00:35:39,040
Speaker 1: getting why now you are telling me that now I

672
00:35:39,080 --> 00:35:41,520
Speaker 1: can't get fed by niggas only because he said he

673
00:35:41,560 --> 00:35:43,680
Speaker 1: feels like he's being treated by meat. But that's why

674
00:35:43,680 --> 00:35:44,799
Speaker 1: I say he can take me how to go get

675
00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:48,439
Speaker 1: some shit. I'm saying I think I make something sex

676
00:35:48,520 --> 00:35:51,880
Speaker 1: focused because they know that's what they like. I actually

677
00:35:51,920 --> 00:35:54,840
Speaker 1: really believe niggas need to let that shit ronge. Oh no,

678
00:35:54,880 --> 00:35:58,120
Speaker 1: you should have seen girl, because I didn't make him

679
00:35:58,120 --> 00:36:00,480
Speaker 1: feel like meat. So he's put on like the the

680
00:36:00,520 --> 00:36:05,239
Speaker 1: documentary around the Submersible, and then we started fucking, so

681
00:36:05,280 --> 00:36:07,839
Speaker 1: we paused it and then he left because I had

682
00:36:07,880 --> 00:36:12,080
Speaker 1: a flight. Bitch, there's twenty five minutes left. Do you

683
00:36:12,160 --> 00:36:14,439
Speaker 1: know he said, don't finish watching it till I come back.

684
00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:19,520
Speaker 1: That's bitch, Now we watching shit together. Oh I thought,

685
00:36:20,000 --> 00:36:22,479
Speaker 1: I thought, I don't wait he left left. I thought

686
00:36:22,560 --> 00:36:25,000
Speaker 1: he left all night, but we had twenty five minutes left,

687
00:36:25,320 --> 00:36:26,560
Speaker 1: and I was like, dang, he told me not to

688
00:36:26,560 --> 00:36:29,280
Speaker 1: finish it until you come back over. That's like leaving

689
00:36:29,320 --> 00:36:31,279
Speaker 1: something making sure he come back. You know. Yeah, my

690
00:36:31,360 --> 00:36:32,959
Speaker 1: nigga didn't talk to me all night because I watched

691
00:36:32,960 --> 00:36:36,480
Speaker 1: White Lotus with bro It becomes well. He was a wait,

692
00:36:36,600 --> 00:36:38,960
Speaker 1: so is that more intimate than him taking me out

693
00:36:38,960 --> 00:36:43,480
Speaker 1: to eat kind of yees? Saving a Netflix show? Yes? Yeah, yes, yes, yeah,

694
00:36:43,520 --> 00:36:47,279
Speaker 1: I will agree. We agree more than babe. No no, no, no,

695
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:49,880
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna like you know it's crazy. You know

696
00:36:49,920 --> 00:36:52,480
Speaker 1: what's crazy experience for him? You know what's crazy. I

697
00:36:52,520 --> 00:36:55,399
Speaker 1: didn't check him on the bab, but if it happened again,

698
00:36:55,400 --> 00:37:02,920
Speaker 1: it might have to check him. So is there a

699
00:37:02,920 --> 00:37:06,560
Speaker 1: way to check someone on a anymore. Why you're too far,

700
00:37:07,080 --> 00:37:10,839
Speaker 1: which we have only fucked three times. Now you're saving,

701
00:37:11,400 --> 00:37:12,839
Speaker 1: Now you're doing the food that you guys are picking

702
00:37:12,840 --> 00:37:14,680
Speaker 1: the ship. You're too far. It's like, what are you

703
00:37:14,719 --> 00:37:18,280
Speaker 1: talking about now? I can't say, babe, bitch, sun up Seau.

704
00:37:18,800 --> 00:37:22,080
Speaker 1: He hasn't slept over yet. Okay, he hasn't slept over yet,

705
00:37:22,239 --> 00:37:24,239
Speaker 1: but that's why he feels like me. And I was like, well,

706
00:37:24,280 --> 00:37:25,879
Speaker 1: Nigga had a fly, you had to get up early

707
00:37:25,920 --> 00:37:30,600
Speaker 1: for work. You made an excuse to why he couldn't

708
00:37:30,640 --> 00:37:33,040
Speaker 1: sleep over. Instead of saying, oh no, I did say

709
00:37:33,040 --> 00:37:35,480
Speaker 1: I would like I like slumber parties, so I said

710
00:37:35,480 --> 00:37:39,560
Speaker 1: we got to do that soon, and he kids, I

711
00:37:39,560 --> 00:37:42,920
Speaker 1: don't like the pet names, bro. I just don't like that.

712
00:37:42,960 --> 00:37:44,800
Speaker 1: If you all go back to maybe like your three

713
00:37:44,840 --> 00:37:48,560
Speaker 1: of Horrible decisions. I've never really liked the pet names, bro,

714
00:37:48,680 --> 00:37:50,719
Speaker 1: because it made me feel like you're just forgetting my name,

715
00:37:50,960 --> 00:37:54,240
Speaker 1: like you fucking with a whole bunch of bitches. Way

716
00:37:54,520 --> 00:37:57,040
Speaker 1: about a friend of mine, you've only met him once

717
00:37:57,120 --> 00:37:59,359
Speaker 1: or twice on my gaze. I don't want to say

718
00:37:59,360 --> 00:38:02,839
Speaker 1: his name though, but he was like saying something about you,

719
00:38:02,880 --> 00:38:05,560
Speaker 1: and I was like, well, is Mandy like that? What

720
00:38:05,600 --> 00:38:10,319
Speaker 1: do you say about me? So in the Breakfast Club interview, yes,

721
00:38:10,880 --> 00:38:13,440
Speaker 1: you said you were single. Mmm. He called me, and

722
00:38:13,480 --> 00:38:16,600
Speaker 1: he's like, I knew it. I was like, knew what

723
00:38:17,280 --> 00:38:21,160
Speaker 1: he's like after listening to the show Mandy when she

724
00:38:21,360 --> 00:38:23,440
Speaker 1: like a nigga, got an energy that I didn't hear

725
00:38:23,719 --> 00:38:26,600
Speaker 1: from her this time around, and I was like really,

726
00:38:27,080 --> 00:38:31,200
Speaker 1: he was like, oh, I remember Mandy was giggly, and

727
00:38:31,280 --> 00:38:33,799
Speaker 1: he was like, so Mandy wasn't giving that energy. I said,

728
00:38:33,840 --> 00:38:37,560
Speaker 1: you know, bring this up. I didn't know that. I

729
00:38:37,560 --> 00:38:39,080
Speaker 1: think he's gonna be at the book signing tonight, so

730
00:38:39,280 --> 00:38:42,040
Speaker 1: I'm gonna having keep going, keep going. He said to me.

731
00:38:42,360 --> 00:38:44,800
Speaker 1: A thing that I thought was very interesting. He said,

732
00:38:45,719 --> 00:38:49,120
Speaker 1: I wasn't even trying to be what's the word when

733
00:38:49,160 --> 00:38:52,800
Speaker 1: you're wanting something to go bad? Malicious? He said, Listening

734
00:38:53,280 --> 00:38:55,839
Speaker 1: I knew Mandy. It felt like he liked it when

735
00:38:55,840 --> 00:38:58,560
Speaker 1: Mandy was just she didn't get google Gaga and I've

736
00:38:58,640 --> 00:39:02,640
Speaker 1: heard her be on the show Your ex the recent X. Okay,

737
00:39:02,760 --> 00:39:05,319
Speaker 1: He's like, I would hear Mandy be like let me

738
00:39:05,080 --> 00:39:08,280
Speaker 1: I mean and get so feminine and girly and whatever.

739
00:39:08,640 --> 00:39:11,720
Speaker 1: He's like, I know, I absolutely did that with my ex.

740
00:39:12,040 --> 00:39:14,920
Speaker 1: I know. Oh the point he's now is when Mandy

741
00:39:15,040 --> 00:39:17,760
Speaker 1: likes a nigga, she's like that. And so I'm saying,

742
00:39:17,800 --> 00:39:20,000
Speaker 1: when you like a nigga and he called you bad

743
00:39:20,160 --> 00:39:25,720
Speaker 1: bitch bag, you're not, you'll enjoy it. I don't know, really,

744
00:39:25,800 --> 00:39:28,160
Speaker 1: go don't like a nigga. You know, it's crazy. I

745
00:39:28,280 --> 00:39:31,239
Speaker 1: like him, but I am so like anti relationship right now,

746
00:39:31,560 --> 00:39:33,840
Speaker 1: right like, but I don't. I don't want it to

747
00:39:33,840 --> 00:39:36,520
Speaker 1: go that far. And I don't think like you, and

748
00:39:36,560 --> 00:39:40,600
Speaker 1: I don't think I'm the one for him. That's your

749
00:39:40,680 --> 00:39:42,840
Speaker 1: your saying you're valid in the whole day, Well, you

750
00:39:42,960 --> 00:39:45,160
Speaker 1: really like a nigga and you're into a nigga, your

751
00:39:45,239 --> 00:39:47,319
Speaker 1: energy is definitely you are like super in luck and

752
00:39:47,440 --> 00:39:51,880
Speaker 1: I didn't think about it. Okay, that's possible. And honestly,

753
00:39:52,000 --> 00:39:56,800
Speaker 1: it's crazy because I wonder if people felt that from

754
00:39:56,880 --> 00:40:00,520
Speaker 1: you while talking about your most recent ex. Because for

755
00:40:00,600 --> 00:40:02,520
Speaker 1: a person who's met you once or twice to be

756
00:40:02,600 --> 00:40:06,719
Speaker 1: like nah, I heard may be different before. Yeah, was

757
00:40:06,760 --> 00:40:10,480
Speaker 1: a narcissist. I was throwed over a nigga. Darren. If

758
00:40:10,520 --> 00:40:13,160
Speaker 1: you listen to the eight years of this fucking podcast.

759
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:17,120
Speaker 1: I was thrown over twenty four seven's Dick Lawyer Bay

760
00:40:18,200 --> 00:40:22,320
Speaker 1: who had a lot of issues, and my ex uh sauwmate.

761
00:40:22,840 --> 00:40:24,560
Speaker 1: Those are the only three niggas that I've ever been

762
00:40:24,600 --> 00:40:26,960
Speaker 1: googly over. I talk about good dinner. You were that

763
00:40:27,000 --> 00:40:29,200
Speaker 1: googly over lawyer Babe. But well, it was it was

764
00:40:29,280 --> 00:40:31,480
Speaker 1: very short lived. I remember it was very short lived.

765
00:40:31,520 --> 00:40:35,240
Speaker 1: I remember one thing specifically you said, and I was like, oh, boy,

766
00:40:35,280 --> 00:40:36,960
Speaker 1: was I google over a nigga that I thought it

767
00:40:37,000 --> 00:40:39,200
Speaker 1: was my sawmate? Yes, I said something about something wrong.

768
00:40:39,239 --> 00:40:42,160
Speaker 1: You said he didn't do nothing wrong. He didn't. He

769
00:40:42,239 --> 00:40:44,160
Speaker 1: was perfect for the whole first year, and that's why

770
00:40:44,200 --> 00:40:47,879
Speaker 1: points But I also say, and it's it's weird because

771
00:40:47,880 --> 00:40:50,800
Speaker 1: even in therapy I'm talking about it, that whole timeline

772
00:40:50,840 --> 00:40:53,680
Speaker 1: of me. First off, it was the pandemic. I was

773
00:40:53,719 --> 00:40:57,320
Speaker 1: cooking every day. I wasn't outside. We were only together me,

774
00:40:57,600 --> 00:41:00,279
Speaker 1: him and my fucking cat like because of the world

775
00:41:00,320 --> 00:41:03,959
Speaker 1: shutting down, Crystal was battling breast cancer like. I wasn't

776
00:41:03,960 --> 00:41:06,640
Speaker 1: even allowed to be around my core group of friends.

777
00:41:06,800 --> 00:41:10,640
Speaker 1: So he was my universe literally for a year, which

778
00:41:10,680 --> 00:41:12,319
Speaker 1: is why he was perfect to me. We had no

779
00:41:12,480 --> 00:41:16,160
Speaker 1: outside influences think about him being perfect or I think

780
00:41:16,239 --> 00:41:18,960
Speaker 1: when you to me out someone, But to me, he's

781
00:41:19,000 --> 00:41:20,839
Speaker 1: the only person that I've ever been like that with.

782
00:41:21,080 --> 00:41:24,000
Speaker 1: And it's why I had such the difficult time saying

783
00:41:24,040 --> 00:41:26,719
Speaker 1: that L word to my ex because this was the

784
00:41:26,719 --> 00:41:29,000
Speaker 1: first person I let all of my guards down for.

785
00:41:29,239 --> 00:41:31,719
Speaker 1: This is the first person I said I love you too,

786
00:41:32,280 --> 00:41:34,760
Speaker 1: And this is the first person that I like, literally

787
00:41:34,840 --> 00:41:37,640
Speaker 1: kept going back to, and I felt like I lost

788
00:41:37,680 --> 00:41:40,200
Speaker 1: myself again, and so me even saying the L word

789
00:41:40,239 --> 00:41:42,480
Speaker 1: to my new X, yes, I probably went into my

790
00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:45,080
Speaker 1: last relationship with trauma that I didn't realize I had.

791
00:41:45,120 --> 00:41:46,920
Speaker 1: Even with the L word, I felt like I was

792
00:41:46,960 --> 00:41:49,080
Speaker 1: a delusional, dumb ass bitch when I was in love

793
00:41:49,080 --> 00:41:51,480
Speaker 1: with him. Being in love is a delusional to me?

794
00:41:51,600 --> 00:41:54,160
Speaker 1: Is this is all to me? Love is not delusion

795
00:41:54,200 --> 00:41:56,840
Speaker 1: for a lot of people. For me, when I said

796
00:41:56,840 --> 00:41:59,200
Speaker 1: that word to a man, when it was said back

797
00:41:59,239 --> 00:42:03,600
Speaker 1: to me, when I look back at it now, I

798
00:42:03,719 --> 00:42:07,759
Speaker 1: felt delusional. I felt stupid. I kept going back as

799
00:42:07,800 --> 00:42:10,080
Speaker 1: well to him for the face of love, which is

800
00:42:10,080 --> 00:42:12,040
Speaker 1: what I said on this podcast, bitch when I went

801
00:42:12,080 --> 00:42:14,920
Speaker 1: back time nine, it was because well, they say that

802
00:42:15,040 --> 00:42:16,719
Speaker 1: love is hard and you gotta fight for it. And

803
00:42:16,920 --> 00:42:19,440
Speaker 1: all the little things about love that I thought I

804
00:42:19,520 --> 00:42:23,000
Speaker 1: had to be in with him makes me feel stupid

805
00:42:23,080 --> 00:42:25,640
Speaker 1: in hindsight. So maybe it's not even that it was love.

806
00:42:25,680 --> 00:42:28,439
Speaker 1: Maybe I was just literally thrown over a narcissist. Maybe

807
00:42:28,440 --> 00:42:31,000
Speaker 1: the self worth I thought I had didn't exist. Maybe

808
00:42:31,040 --> 00:42:33,600
Speaker 1: there was still things I was getting over. But for me,

809
00:42:34,040 --> 00:42:39,360
Speaker 1: what that relationship resembles now is so like choppy that

810
00:42:40,080 --> 00:42:42,480
Speaker 1: no love to me, isn't that? And the way I

811
00:42:42,600 --> 00:42:45,080
Speaker 1: was googly eyed for that man, the way I was

812
00:42:45,120 --> 00:42:47,400
Speaker 1: able to exist with him, I literally look back now,

813
00:42:47,440 --> 00:42:49,160
Speaker 1: I've talked about it in therapy and I'm like, bro,

814
00:42:49,280 --> 00:42:52,040
Speaker 1: the world was ending. Do you think that you can

815
00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:55,839
Speaker 1: be or that being googly can be something safe when

816
00:42:55,840 --> 00:42:58,480
Speaker 1: you're with someone? I mean, and let's be honest, your

817
00:42:58,520 --> 00:43:02,440
Speaker 1: most recent acts like you enjoy that company absolutely affirming,

818
00:43:02,680 --> 00:43:05,920
Speaker 1: Like do you think you could ever be googly again

819
00:43:06,120 --> 00:43:07,080
Speaker 1: and feel safe?

820
00:43:07,120 --> 00:43:07,200
Speaker 2: Like?

821
00:43:07,239 --> 00:43:09,680
Speaker 1: Do you think that there's safety in that? I just

822
00:43:09,680 --> 00:43:17,320
Speaker 1: think I have said it now a few times my mom, my, sister, myself,

823
00:43:18,040 --> 00:43:21,200
Speaker 1: and a lot of the conversations with my friends. It's

824
00:43:21,200 --> 00:43:25,400
Speaker 1: a work in progress. I having it felt so safe

825
00:43:25,840 --> 00:43:29,239
Speaker 1: in that relationship during the pandemic and feeling so hurt

826
00:43:29,280 --> 00:43:32,000
Speaker 1: and betrayed and manipulated and gaslet and all those things.

827
00:43:32,239 --> 00:43:35,400
Speaker 1: In hindsight, to me, I am still at a place

828
00:43:35,440 --> 00:43:39,040
Speaker 1: where I haven't felt safety with a man. So I

829
00:43:39,120 --> 00:43:41,319
Speaker 1: can't say that like I could be googly eyed and

830
00:43:41,320 --> 00:43:43,480
Speaker 1: throw it over Nigga. And this again could be my

831
00:43:43,560 --> 00:43:46,720
Speaker 1: defense mechanism as to why Captain hook ain't really getting

832
00:43:47,040 --> 00:43:50,239
Speaker 1: the googly from me. I don't want that right now,

833
00:43:50,640 --> 00:43:52,800
Speaker 1: and I don't know when I'm going to be ready

834
00:43:52,840 --> 00:43:56,200
Speaker 1: to get that, but right now, especially having to navigate

835
00:43:56,320 --> 00:43:59,239
Speaker 1: not wanting children, not wanting these things, and standing firm

836
00:43:59,280 --> 00:44:01,920
Speaker 1: on it and finding soe that respects that, to me,

837
00:44:02,320 --> 00:44:07,960
Speaker 1: I'm I'm really cool with just like enjoying like the

838
00:44:08,040 --> 00:44:11,319
Speaker 1: joys of life, like my friendships, like being able to

839
00:44:11,360 --> 00:44:13,440
Speaker 1: live in Atlanta out and be close to like my

840
00:44:13,520 --> 00:44:16,879
Speaker 1: fucking friends, like it feels so good. And not saying

841
00:44:16,880 --> 00:44:18,759
Speaker 1: that I didn't have friends in New York, but like

842
00:44:19,040 --> 00:44:20,640
Speaker 1: these are my friends I've been friends with for like

843
00:44:20,840 --> 00:44:23,800
Speaker 1: fifteen plus years, Like Crystal just made it to fourteen.

844
00:44:23,840 --> 00:44:25,840
Speaker 1: My other friend we've been friends since tenth grade. So

845
00:44:25,960 --> 00:44:29,040
Speaker 1: like these friends are like they've just known me. It

846
00:44:29,160 --> 00:44:31,920
Speaker 1: just feels different. And so for me, it's that it's traveling.

847
00:44:32,239 --> 00:44:35,160
Speaker 1: It's the new baby of our book. It's the new

848
00:44:35,200 --> 00:44:39,920
Speaker 1: baby of selective ignorance. It's me thinking, Okay, realistically, I'm

849
00:44:39,920 --> 00:44:41,640
Speaker 1: in this new city. What other things do I want

850
00:44:41,680 --> 00:44:45,080
Speaker 1: to do? And so for me, a relationship doesn't seem

851
00:44:45,120 --> 00:44:46,560
Speaker 1: like the work I want to do right now. And

852
00:44:46,719 --> 00:44:50,200
Speaker 1: relationships are work. I said it, like yeah, and I

853
00:44:50,200 --> 00:44:53,080
Speaker 1: worked with some shit. I had to make space and

854
00:44:53,120 --> 00:44:56,600
Speaker 1: I don't think I had the space around the time

855
00:44:56,640 --> 00:45:00,200
Speaker 1: that I broke up with Olbay. And it's a good thing.

856
00:45:00,760 --> 00:45:01,920
Speaker 1: I don't know, it's a good thing. Goun to me,

857
00:45:02,000 --> 00:45:03,439
Speaker 1: my partner, and I remember he was saying the same

858
00:45:03,440 --> 00:45:06,520
Speaker 1: thing to me, like damn, even like six months earlier,

859
00:45:06,560 --> 00:45:09,160
Speaker 1: I don't know, Yeah, where will we be because you

860
00:45:09,320 --> 00:45:12,640
Speaker 1: actually do have to make room and making room is

861
00:45:12,680 --> 00:45:16,480
Speaker 1: something that like, I don't think it sucks because we

862
00:45:16,520 --> 00:45:19,200
Speaker 1: could want to receive love, intimacy, whatever, But it's like

863
00:45:20,000 --> 00:45:22,600
Speaker 1: timing matters if I'm just kind of prioritizing this thing.

864
00:45:23,120 --> 00:45:25,239
Speaker 1: I just realized this week just with our press tour.

865
00:45:25,280 --> 00:45:27,920
Speaker 1: Moh blah blah blah, whatever is going on. He was

866
00:45:27,920 --> 00:45:30,359
Speaker 1: gonna come over yesterday. Yes, we just got back from

867
00:45:30,400 --> 00:45:32,200
Speaker 1: a trip together. It's only in twenty four hours. He

868
00:45:32,280 --> 00:45:33,719
Speaker 1: was like, miss She goes like, miss you too, come

869
00:45:33,760 --> 00:45:36,319
Speaker 1: over and I was like, just heads up, I make

870
00:45:36,400 --> 00:45:39,919
Speaker 1: up at ten thirty in the morning. He's like, all right, baby,

871
00:45:39,920 --> 00:45:41,360
Speaker 1: I'm gonna I'll stay home. I'll see you at the

872
00:45:41,360 --> 00:45:44,080
Speaker 1: book Sadie. And I was like, why can't you come over.

873
00:45:45,040 --> 00:45:47,920
Speaker 1: He's like, we're gonna get wrapped up and shit and

874
00:45:47,960 --> 00:45:50,440
Speaker 1: by the time you wake up for me and breakfast,

875
00:45:50,480 --> 00:45:53,600
Speaker 1: you got makeup, Like I need to leave you alone.

876
00:45:54,360 --> 00:45:57,560
Speaker 1: And I was laughing about it to myself because I'm like,

877
00:45:57,920 --> 00:46:01,719
Speaker 1: oh my god, Like there is really a world of

878
00:46:01,800 --> 00:46:05,880
Speaker 1: like you don't have time. Yeah, like I don't. I

879
00:46:06,360 --> 00:46:09,840
Speaker 1: don't have time bucked, But it's true. I want to

880
00:46:09,840 --> 00:46:11,880
Speaker 1: get fucked, but I don't have time. And this is

881
00:46:11,920 --> 00:46:15,440
Speaker 1: gonna sound by the way, this is gonna sound bad. Yeah,

882
00:46:15,440 --> 00:46:17,320
Speaker 1: I know limited vocabulary. It's gonna sound bad. Is it

883
00:46:17,360 --> 00:46:20,400
Speaker 1: gonna bad or it's gonna be I don't have the

884
00:46:20,480 --> 00:46:23,840
Speaker 1: time right now. This is gonna sound so bad. And

885
00:46:23,880 --> 00:46:25,520
Speaker 1: I know it, but I don't know another word to use.

886
00:46:26,480 --> 00:46:29,360
Speaker 1: I don't have the time right now to consider somebody

887
00:46:29,440 --> 00:46:33,040
Speaker 1: else that doesn't sound okay. Well, they be fucking heavy

888
00:46:33,120 --> 00:46:37,279
Speaker 1: dragging me for everything. Oh my god, I said, motherfuckers

889
00:46:37,280 --> 00:46:39,560
Speaker 1: deserve the relationships, stay in and I'm getting draged, so

890
00:46:39,960 --> 00:46:42,600
Speaker 1: people deserve to be killed and abuse. Shut the fuck up.

891
00:46:42,600 --> 00:46:45,000
Speaker 1: I don't know it worth any So I missed a

892
00:46:45,040 --> 00:46:46,799
Speaker 1: few texts from him, and he wrote me back and said,

893
00:46:47,160 --> 00:46:49,120
Speaker 1: do you love me? I wrote him back, I said,

894
00:46:49,160 --> 00:46:51,600
Speaker 1: your pages eighty eight through ninety in my book, I

895
00:46:51,680 --> 00:46:54,520
Speaker 1: love you, And don't make that the clarify because there's

896
00:46:54,520 --> 00:46:56,279
Speaker 1: a lot of people who ain't get mentioned in my book.

897
00:46:56,280 --> 00:46:58,360
Speaker 1: You know. It was just fucking around, okay, And I said,

898
00:46:59,360 --> 00:47:03,520
Speaker 1: I really am selfish right now. Sorry, and he was like,

899
00:47:03,520 --> 00:47:05,719
Speaker 1: you're good, baby, like it's your week. But I think

900
00:47:05,800 --> 00:47:07,520
Speaker 1: you actually do need to kind of say to someone

901
00:47:08,640 --> 00:47:11,480
Speaker 1: I don't I can't consider or I don't have the

902
00:47:11,520 --> 00:47:15,800
Speaker 1: capacity to be responsible right now for how you feel

903
00:47:16,200 --> 00:47:19,040
Speaker 1: or how you want to be treated, because I don't

904
00:47:19,080 --> 00:47:21,320
Speaker 1: have the capacity to be there for you right and

905
00:47:21,360 --> 00:47:22,759
Speaker 1: I need to say that. And I think it didn't

906
00:47:22,840 --> 00:47:25,799
Speaker 1: hit me. This is the first time in this relationship

907
00:47:25,880 --> 00:47:28,840
Speaker 1: because when we went on the last horrible tour twenty

908
00:47:28,880 --> 00:47:31,080
Speaker 1: twenty three and I were dated. Oh yeah, last year

909
00:47:31,120 --> 00:47:32,880
Speaker 1: we didn't tour at all. I know last year was

910
00:47:32,920 --> 00:47:34,959
Speaker 1: easy to be. That's why I was on the phone

911
00:47:34,960 --> 00:47:37,560
Speaker 1: with Activating for three hours in Yare somch I ain't

912
00:47:37,600 --> 00:47:39,160
Speaker 1: got the time to talk to a nigga that long

913
00:47:39,239 --> 00:47:41,560
Speaker 1: now book and then he came over like bruh. So

914
00:47:42,040 --> 00:47:45,480
Speaker 1: now he's like, Yo, it's cool, don't worry. And I'm

915
00:47:45,520 --> 00:47:50,000
Speaker 1: appreciative of that. But you know, yes, he even hit

916
00:47:50,040 --> 00:47:52,680
Speaker 1: me and said, uh, what do you need me to do?

917
00:47:52,680 --> 00:47:54,680
Speaker 1: Do you want me to drive you? Like, tell me

918
00:47:54,840 --> 00:47:56,480
Speaker 1: you know some health you need, like you know on

919
00:47:56,520 --> 00:47:58,239
Speaker 1: this move. You want me to take you to Connecticut? You

920
00:47:58,280 --> 00:48:01,120
Speaker 1: want to take you guys here. I'm like, yo, I

921
00:48:01,120 --> 00:48:04,799
Speaker 1: don't even want you to feel so over exhausted from

922
00:48:05,040 --> 00:48:08,920
Speaker 1: our shit. And I I was like, I guess we

923
00:48:09,000 --> 00:48:10,359
Speaker 1: really do have to be a part. I gotta get

924
00:48:10,360 --> 00:48:12,960
Speaker 1: this shit done. And it feels good. It's great, like

925
00:48:13,480 --> 00:48:16,520
Speaker 1: you know, especially when knowing that like you have the support,

926
00:48:16,560 --> 00:48:18,040
Speaker 1: but it does make you be like, oh, I gotta

927
00:48:18,040 --> 00:48:20,360
Speaker 1: be selfish. But the way I want Dick and I

928
00:48:20,440 --> 00:48:23,200
Speaker 1: have to tell him I'm supposed to be bleeding when

929
00:48:23,239 --> 00:48:25,520
Speaker 1: I get back, so then I gotta go on another trip.

930
00:48:26,160 --> 00:48:28,640
Speaker 1: It's literally like twelve days before I could even have

931
00:48:28,800 --> 00:48:32,759
Speaker 1: dick again. And I'm like, damn, I gotta tell you. You

932
00:48:32,560 --> 00:48:34,840
Speaker 1: can't even fuck me for the next two weeks. Oh

933
00:48:34,920 --> 00:48:36,440
Speaker 1: my god, Like, what the fuck? I need to tell

934
00:48:36,440 --> 00:48:39,720
Speaker 1: you guys something. This was a very weird, nasty little

935
00:48:39,719 --> 00:48:42,400
Speaker 1: flirt that should probably be illegal from the guy at

936
00:48:42,440 --> 00:48:45,920
Speaker 1: one of the pharmacias on Lower East Side. What the fuck? Okay, So,

937
00:48:46,280 --> 00:48:48,120
Speaker 1: since it's the ketchup and mustard and you just said

938
00:48:48,160 --> 00:48:51,200
Speaker 1: bleeding at this point, no, at this point, decisions decisions,

939
00:48:51,239 --> 00:48:54,240
Speaker 1: y'all wanted some horrible decisions content here the fuck you go? Okay,

940
00:48:54,520 --> 00:48:55,920
Speaker 1: So if you want more, you can go to Patreon.

941
00:48:55,960 --> 00:48:59,040
Speaker 1: This is where we do it. So I didn't realize

942
00:48:59,120 --> 00:49:02,120
Speaker 1: I'll order my I ain't medicine or my birst control

943
00:49:02,160 --> 00:49:04,359
Speaker 1: from one of those like subscription services that just send

944
00:49:04,360 --> 00:49:07,359
Speaker 1: them to you. I don't know if it's in LA

945
00:49:07,480 --> 00:49:09,280
Speaker 1: I don't know, but I'm on my last pill. Today.

946
00:49:09,440 --> 00:49:11,799
Speaker 1: I was worrying and I'm like, oh shit, this book

947
00:49:11,800 --> 00:49:14,520
Speaker 1: pub day and I'm fucking hype. I'm like, damn it,

948
00:49:14,600 --> 00:49:16,160
Speaker 1: my alarm went off. You know what? Always goes off

949
00:49:16,200 --> 00:49:19,759
Speaker 1: in an interview. This fucked. I call the company. They're like, shit,

950
00:49:19,800 --> 00:49:21,360
Speaker 1: we can't get to you here for seventy four hours.

951
00:49:21,680 --> 00:49:24,920
Speaker 1: Now I am a little nervous because this would be

952
00:49:24,960 --> 00:49:27,080
Speaker 1: my population time. Technically, I'm just scared and I'm on

953
00:49:27,120 --> 00:49:33,360
Speaker 1: low estrogen. You just don't fuck right talking about you

954
00:49:33,480 --> 00:49:35,719
Speaker 1: scared it Just don't fuck it. First of all, you

955
00:49:35,800 --> 00:49:39,799
Speaker 1: touching look, and I was like, just easy, fixed, bro,

956
00:49:40,400 --> 00:49:42,440
Speaker 1: it's not bad. It's just I don't know how if

957
00:49:42,440 --> 00:49:44,680
Speaker 1: it like throws you off, well, just don't fuck God

958
00:49:44,719 --> 00:49:47,719
Speaker 1: for how long till you get your ship back? And

959
00:49:47,760 --> 00:49:49,680
Speaker 1: it's not even that once I take the pill, does

960
00:49:49,719 --> 00:49:51,719
Speaker 1: it throw me off? I don't want inconsistencies. I heard

961
00:49:51,719 --> 00:49:54,760
Speaker 1: when you're on low estro it like really only lasting

962
00:49:54,800 --> 00:49:57,239
Speaker 1: your body for twenty four hours. So don't don't fuck

963
00:49:57,280 --> 00:49:59,160
Speaker 1: for twenty four hours. It's not just twenty four hours,

964
00:49:59,200 --> 00:50:02,640
Speaker 1: so don't fuck for four It's not that I again,

965
00:50:02,920 --> 00:50:05,040
Speaker 1: does it throw my body off for like a week? Girlss,

966
00:50:06,320 --> 00:50:08,479
Speaker 1: this is an emergency. Don't don't work for a week,

967
00:50:08,560 --> 00:50:11,359
Speaker 1: wait till you get back regulated. No, it's not gonna

968
00:50:11,400 --> 00:50:16,240
Speaker 1: work for me. So anyway, everybody trying to is your engineer.

969
00:50:16,280 --> 00:50:18,480
Speaker 1: I don't appreciate this, like just lock that you're not

970
00:50:18,480 --> 00:50:23,920
Speaker 1: in her common don't lock. Okay, So this happens. So

971
00:50:24,160 --> 00:50:26,800
Speaker 1: I'm like, what do I do? So the lady on

972
00:50:26,840 --> 00:50:30,680
Speaker 1: the phone goes, this is advice that's off the record.

973
00:50:31,200 --> 00:50:33,799
Speaker 1: But if you prove that you have a subscription, sometimes

974
00:50:34,080 --> 00:50:35,960
Speaker 1: you can go to a local pharmacy and they'll actually

975
00:50:36,000 --> 00:50:38,480
Speaker 1: give you like an emergency script. Just try it. She

976
00:50:38,560 --> 00:50:40,640
Speaker 1: was like, it happens most of the time for like inhalers

977
00:50:40,960 --> 00:50:44,680
Speaker 1: or things that are like dire emergency insulin birth control

978
00:50:44,760 --> 00:50:47,359
Speaker 1: is do they consider birth control dire because it could

979
00:50:47,360 --> 00:50:53,400
Speaker 1: throw you off? So anyway, Ashes no one to Walgreens

980
00:50:53,480 --> 00:50:56,840
Speaker 1: maybe then went to a local one and there was

981
00:50:56,880 --> 00:51:00,319
Speaker 1: a man and he was young, maybe thirty eight. I'm

982
00:51:00,360 --> 00:51:01,960
Speaker 1: not trying to smile, it's just the way that he

983
00:51:02,000 --> 00:51:05,680
Speaker 1: was learning to me was crazy. So he's like, how

984
00:51:05,680 --> 00:51:06,880
Speaker 1: can I help you? And I was like, I know

985
00:51:07,000 --> 00:51:09,320
Speaker 1: this has been on orthodox. I've never even shopped here before,

986
00:51:09,440 --> 00:51:12,640
Speaker 1: but I'm your neighbor and I'm trying to get this

987
00:51:12,719 --> 00:51:16,720
Speaker 1: script filled. But this first control and I'm a little worried,

988
00:51:16,800 --> 00:51:20,200
Speaker 1: you know, it'll throw my cycle off or whatever. He

989
00:51:20,239 --> 00:51:23,919
Speaker 1: said with these eyes. I sort of, God, you need

990
00:51:23,960 --> 00:51:27,680
Speaker 1: it that fast, you need that badly. And by the

991
00:51:27,719 --> 00:51:29,520
Speaker 1: way he's smiling, I know he's gonna give it to me.

992
00:51:29,840 --> 00:51:35,120
Speaker 1: This sounds like a violation, like a healthcare professional hip.

993
00:51:36,200 --> 00:51:43,959
Speaker 1: This is giving Tyler Perry response that's appropriate. Then I'm like, okay,

994
00:51:43,960 --> 00:51:46,279
Speaker 1: I guess I'll just do this back. I was like, well,

995
00:51:46,280 --> 00:51:49,160
Speaker 1: it's not that, it's just then I'll start my cycle

996
00:51:49,200 --> 00:51:50,719
Speaker 1: if I don't take it, and I just don't want

997
00:51:50,760 --> 00:51:52,440
Speaker 1: it to He was like, can't have that on a

998
00:51:52,440 --> 00:51:56,960
Speaker 1: summer day and I was like, no, no, no, just

999
00:51:56,960 --> 00:51:59,520
Speaker 1: because we yucking it. You liked it, so see you

1000
00:52:00,120 --> 00:52:02,600
Speaker 1: change your faith? Nah? No, I flirted for birth control.

1001
00:52:02,600 --> 00:52:08,240
Speaker 1: Hold on. Wow. So right now it is ten ten am.

1002
00:52:08,320 --> 00:52:11,400
Speaker 1: I just left Trap Palace workout and I'm just like, bro, like,

1003
00:52:11,480 --> 00:52:13,520
Speaker 1: how long is this going to take? So I was like,

1004
00:52:14,040 --> 00:52:16,240
Speaker 1: I'm just getting what you want. I was like, listen,

1005
00:52:17,239 --> 00:52:19,760
Speaker 1: I really need it badly because I do have plans

1006
00:52:19,800 --> 00:52:22,040
Speaker 1: this week and I don't want to mess anything up

1007
00:52:22,080 --> 00:52:24,440
Speaker 1: and I would rather be safe than sorry. He's like,

1008
00:52:24,440 --> 00:52:26,600
Speaker 1: I want you to be really really safe too. I

1009
00:52:26,600 --> 00:52:28,759
Speaker 1: don't want you to have any mishaps. He goes, but

1010
00:52:29,480 --> 00:52:33,839
Speaker 1: we do have condoms? Would you like condoms? And I'm like, oh,

1011
00:52:33,920 --> 00:52:36,480
Speaker 1: now you want me to say, I don't want to

1012
00:52:36,560 --> 00:52:39,600
Speaker 1: use kinda I want to cream by imposed to marry

1013
00:52:40,080 --> 00:52:41,839
Speaker 1: that's what you want. I don't think that's I think

1014
00:52:41,840 --> 00:52:45,080
Speaker 1: he was just giving you an alternative, like we just did. Look,

1015
00:52:45,400 --> 00:52:47,960
Speaker 1: we said, don't have sex. He said condoms, and now

1016
00:52:48,000 --> 00:52:51,080
Speaker 1: you feel I said, well, they're not guaranteed. So I

1017
00:52:51,200 --> 00:52:54,279
Speaker 1: was like, bro, they are ninety nine percent and which

1018
00:52:54,360 --> 00:52:57,640
Speaker 1: the point one swimmer? Bro? Are you kidding me right now?

1019
00:52:57,680 --> 00:52:59,839
Speaker 1: So I was like, please, Bro, do you hear this?

1020
00:53:00,120 --> 00:53:04,320
Speaker 1: Just if it's now condoms? Are you seriously want me?

1021
00:53:04,400 --> 00:53:06,720
Speaker 1: There's birth control? Don't how any women have gotten pregnant

1022
00:53:06,719 --> 00:53:09,319
Speaker 1: on birth control? I would like you shut up? I

1023
00:53:09,360 --> 00:53:11,839
Speaker 1: know I actually want to look up chat gibt. I

1024
00:53:11,880 --> 00:53:15,600
Speaker 1: think I think condoms have a better I think condoms

1025
00:53:15,600 --> 00:53:19,560
Speaker 1: have a better success rate. Then then Robert, no, but like,

1026
00:53:20,040 --> 00:53:22,879
Speaker 1: you're not on the pill right now. I just took it.

1027
00:53:23,000 --> 00:53:24,960
Speaker 1: Oh you gave it to me. Oh this is this

1028
00:53:24,960 --> 00:53:26,439
Speaker 1: is how you gave it to me. So I act

1029
00:53:26,520 --> 00:53:28,160
Speaker 1: he gave it to me. I said I didn't want

1030
00:53:28,160 --> 00:53:30,520
Speaker 1: to know condoms. He's like, all right, I'm gonna give

1031
00:53:30,520 --> 00:53:33,000
Speaker 1: you another brand that we have here. So you said

1032
00:53:33,280 --> 00:53:36,960
Speaker 1: low estrogen birth control pills. Yeah, I'm not trying to

1033
00:53:36,960 --> 00:53:40,600
Speaker 1: be as Laurena. I think I'm on. I just want

1034
00:53:40,600 --> 00:53:44,719
Speaker 1: to know which one is more effective tatchipt my man

1035
00:53:46,200 --> 00:53:50,160
Speaker 1: be giving me all the tea. Okay, they're both effective

1036
00:53:50,200 --> 00:53:56,680
Speaker 1: methods because she's a cut. Okay, there's a one percent difference.

1037
00:53:57,280 --> 00:54:00,560
Speaker 1: Perfect use effectiveness. Condoms is ninety eight percent. The low

1038
00:54:00,680 --> 00:54:02,560
Speaker 1: estrogen pills are ninety nine percent.

1039
00:54:02,760 --> 00:54:05,080
Speaker 2: Okay, So I mean the pill sounds like it's a

1040
00:54:05,080 --> 00:54:09,600
Speaker 2: better yeah, but there's still like it's still well, you

1041
00:54:09,680 --> 00:54:10,320
Speaker 2: still got.

1042
00:54:10,120 --> 00:54:13,560
Speaker 1: The one percent that you were scared of. Hun anyway,

1043
00:54:13,600 --> 00:54:16,400
Speaker 1: you're just saying. So he goes to get it, and

1044
00:54:16,400 --> 00:54:19,879
Speaker 1: he goes, I want you to pick, So like what

1045
00:54:20,040 --> 00:54:22,719
Speaker 1: pick what? He's like the brand? He's like, so let

1046
00:54:22,719 --> 00:54:25,680
Speaker 1: me just show you. He's like, whatever's best for you.

1047
00:54:26,080 --> 00:54:28,719
Speaker 1: So then he puts them out in his hand like this,

1048
00:54:29,440 --> 00:54:31,480
Speaker 1: So I had to fucking grab it instead of putting

1049
00:54:31,520 --> 00:54:33,279
Speaker 1: it down on the table, and I was like, he

1050
00:54:33,600 --> 00:54:37,080
Speaker 1: wants to fuck me, he wants me in and around

1051
00:54:37,120 --> 00:54:39,080
Speaker 1: his mouth, and you know what, I just didn't want

1052
00:54:39,120 --> 00:54:41,040
Speaker 1: him to say no. So I was like, I'll take

1053
00:54:41,160 --> 00:54:43,440
Speaker 1: that one, and I like gotta tapped his wrist and

1054
00:54:43,520 --> 00:54:45,560
Speaker 1: he was like, that was so good. That was so good.

1055
00:54:45,640 --> 00:54:49,920
Speaker 1: You made that twice, bitch. Anyway, rang it up. It

1056
00:54:49,960 --> 00:54:52,040
Speaker 1: was forty eight dollars. I say, old, no, that's how high.

1057
00:54:52,160 --> 00:54:54,759
Speaker 1: It's only thirty days. That the fuck. So he's like,

1058
00:54:54,760 --> 00:54:56,200
Speaker 1: I'm gonna give you a discount if you come back

1059
00:54:56,239 --> 00:55:00,239
Speaker 1: to me. Never, this sounds like you cheated on man.

1060
00:55:01,120 --> 00:55:03,799
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna lie this a little. This is a lot.

1061
00:55:04,400 --> 00:55:07,319
Speaker 1: It's Michael cheating. Should I cut this out? No, it's

1062
00:55:07,320 --> 00:55:12,920
Speaker 1: staying in bro executive decisions. They get show work control

1063
00:55:12,960 --> 00:55:16,479
Speaker 1: pills because you couldn't use condoms. Mandy. It's not about

1064
00:55:16,520 --> 00:55:18,920
Speaker 1: the condoms. I'm really scared to get off birth control

1065
00:55:19,000 --> 00:55:21,319
Speaker 1: for like a day because if I throw my ship off,

1066
00:55:22,120 --> 00:55:23,919
Speaker 1: do you want me to be a looney tuner this week?

1067
00:55:24,200 --> 00:55:26,560
Speaker 1: I'm already. I mean, birth control pills make you do

1068
00:55:26,680 --> 00:55:29,560
Speaker 1: that too. But if you're off off, it's just like

1069
00:55:29,640 --> 00:55:32,000
Speaker 1: I'm a little worried about being off. And also like

1070
00:55:32,080 --> 00:55:34,160
Speaker 1: the way people scare you about birth control, like you

1071
00:55:34,280 --> 00:55:35,680
Speaker 1: have to take it this time. You don't want to

1072
00:55:35,719 --> 00:55:37,919
Speaker 1: do this, like it's just too scary. And I've also

1073
00:55:38,400 --> 00:55:40,000
Speaker 1: you know, I don't know how deep we are into

1074
00:55:40,040 --> 00:55:41,800
Speaker 1: the book, but if you read my love chapter like that,

1075
00:55:41,840 --> 00:55:44,120
Speaker 1: ship was scary. But I don't want to. I feel

1076
00:55:44,400 --> 00:55:48,239
Speaker 1: I want to know when I'm pregnant. So's to pull

1077
00:55:48,280 --> 00:55:55,400
Speaker 1: on the vacuum, pull out, pull out, but pull out

1078
00:55:55,440 --> 00:56:01,600
Speaker 1: the vacuum. Thanks so much for joining us. Another episode Decisions.

1079
00:56:02,160 --> 00:56:05,239
Speaker 1: This is pretty all bitch ass holes on the motherfucking

1080
00:56:05,480 --> 00:56:07,400
Speaker 1: By the way, just so you know, this is a

1081
00:56:07,480 --> 00:56:11,759
Speaker 1: Celsius making me this way. This is not so real quick,

1082
00:56:12,200 --> 00:56:15,440
Speaker 1: by the way, this is Celsius. What happened immunity juice

1083
00:56:15,560 --> 00:56:18,839
Speaker 1: this morning and something else? Because I have so much

1084
00:56:18,840 --> 00:56:21,919
Speaker 1: anxiety that's really like, my anxiety right now is fucking

1085
00:56:21,960 --> 00:56:23,839
Speaker 1: off the charts and I'm pre message. I love about

1086
00:56:23,840 --> 00:56:25,200
Speaker 1: to come out my pussy in a day. But you know,

1087
00:56:25,360 --> 00:56:28,359
Speaker 1: need no, no, no, So so I talked to my mom,

1088
00:56:28,440 --> 00:56:32,160
Speaker 1: I talked to my friends. They say, no caffeine and bitch,

1089
00:56:32,200 --> 00:56:34,400
Speaker 1: you know I drink always. Is this she said, this

1090
00:56:34,480 --> 00:56:37,000
Speaker 1: is health This is a healthier caffeine and cofee. She

1091
00:56:37,040 --> 00:56:40,680
Speaker 1: said no coffee. So she said to a Celsius, it's healthier.

1092
00:56:40,800 --> 00:56:43,120
Speaker 1: She said no caffeine. No looker, so bitch. Also also

1093
00:56:43,200 --> 00:56:46,600
Speaker 1: all week I'm not drinking liquor, so like anyways, this

1094
00:56:46,680 --> 00:56:48,080
Speaker 1: is getna hype. So I do want to talk y'all

1095
00:56:48,120 --> 00:56:51,680
Speaker 1: real quick, because this was an episode of decisions decisions,

1096
00:56:52,040 --> 00:56:54,800
Speaker 1: and you put the assholes since the rebrand want to

1097
00:56:54,840 --> 00:56:57,239
Speaker 1: act like changing one motherfucking word and change who the

1098
00:56:57,320 --> 00:57:00,319
Speaker 1: fuck we is. Just know this is why y'all whole

1099
00:57:00,840 --> 00:57:04,160
Speaker 1: just got shown as a horrible decision. You changed more

1100
00:57:04,200 --> 00:57:06,399
Speaker 1: niggas than me. No, no, no, no, no no oh yeah,

1101
00:57:06,440 --> 00:57:10,320
Speaker 1: bring it back. You find eight niggas that I funck savy.

1102
00:57:11,480 --> 00:57:13,640
Speaker 1: You just wanted me to have one more than you,

1103
00:57:14,040 --> 00:57:16,200
Speaker 1: and that is crazy because I feel like you're still

1104
00:57:16,280 --> 00:57:16,920
Speaker 1: leaving someone else.

1105
00:57:16,920 --> 00:57:19,360
Speaker 2: I just want to say, your energy drink has two

1106
00:57:19,400 --> 00:57:22,240
Speaker 2: hundred milligrams caffeine, which is like considered a really vin

1107
00:57:22,400 --> 00:57:23,040
Speaker 2: same as that like.

1108
00:57:23,080 --> 00:57:26,080
Speaker 1: That calm down, No no, no, he died fucking a

1109
00:57:26,320 --> 00:57:28,000
Speaker 1: girl like that was way too young for him. No,

1110
00:57:28,240 --> 00:57:31,600
Speaker 1: they said that there was he consumed high energy drink

1111
00:57:31,680 --> 00:57:33,840
Speaker 1: or something. Bitch, I never drink high energy drinks. This

1112
00:57:33,840 --> 00:57:36,600
Speaker 1: is my blood pressure. Yeah, he was ald htension. He

1113
00:57:36,680 --> 00:57:39,080
Speaker 1: was like his fifty hard pretension talking about fat. Wasn't

1114
00:57:39,080 --> 00:57:45,400
Speaker 1: that bad? Damn yo RP, Jesus, I'm sorry. Like rest

1115
00:57:45,480 --> 00:57:51,880
Speaker 1: and pleasure the relationship you deserve, drinking the damn you

1116
00:57:51,960 --> 00:57:55,080
Speaker 1: women like their hell we got ship to do them

1117
00:57:55,160 --> 00:57:57,960
Speaker 1: bitches still big got more episodes that do you know what?

1118
00:57:58,080 --> 00:58:00,800
Speaker 1: More episodes we got to do more horrible decisions will

1119
00:58:00,800 --> 00:58:03,880
Speaker 1: say so So if you want some more horrible decisions,

1120
00:58:04,440 --> 00:58:06,960
Speaker 1: five dollars a month to get you a babe. That's

1121
00:58:07,000 --> 00:58:09,600
Speaker 1: how she says it, right, okay, baby judged bab. Five

1122
00:58:09,680 --> 00:58:13,400
Speaker 1: dollars say it gets you fine, gets you fucking more

1123
00:58:13,440 --> 00:58:16,320
Speaker 1: horrible decisions episodes. So take your eyes over to patreon

1124
00:58:16,560 --> 00:58:19,640
Speaker 1: dot com backslash horrible decisions, spout w H O R

1125
00:58:19,760 --> 00:58:22,760
Speaker 1: E and get your fucking shit bab. Okay, five dollars

1126
00:58:22,800 --> 00:58:25,160
Speaker 1: a month, bab, Thanks Bob, See you next week, Bed