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Speaker 1: Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio. Good Morning.

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Speaker 1: This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's

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Speaker 1: tip is to leave criticism to the critics. If it

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Speaker 1: is not your job to critique other people's performance, and

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Speaker 1: if you aren't specifically asked for critical feedback from someone

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Speaker 1: who wants your advice on how to improve, then you

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Speaker 1: don't have to offer it. We would probably all be

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Speaker 1: better off if people spend less time tearing down what

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Speaker 1: others have done and more time building each other up. Now,

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Speaker 1: I want to start this episode by saying, I do

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Speaker 1: believe there is a place for criticism. I love to

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Speaker 1: read book reviews, and I have written a lot of

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Speaker 1: book reviews for various publications as well. Reviews can be

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Speaker 1: extremely helpful for deciding whether or a given book is

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Speaker 1: for you. Same for reviews of movies, plays, music, art exhibits.

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Speaker 1: In many cases, formal, thoughtful reviews of artistic work can

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Speaker 1: help artists get attention. It shows their ideas are being

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Speaker 1: taken seriously, and this is a good thing. I think

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Speaker 1: there is also a place for political commentators who could

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Speaker 1: help people see the promise and the missteps in our

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Speaker 1: leader's efforts. Thoughtful, well researched criticism can help people think

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Speaker 1: of things in new ways. But and I think you

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Speaker 1: knew this but was coming. I think we would all

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Speaker 1: be better off with less criticism. Outside of formal critiques,

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Speaker 1: there is no benefit to casually criticizing other people in

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Speaker 1: their work. The world is big enough that there is

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Speaker 1: space for all of us to work without tearing people down.

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Speaker 1: Ingrid Fatelle Lee, author of the book Joyful, recently wrote

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Speaker 1: in her news letter that years ago I made a

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Speaker 1: rule for myself never speak negatively about other creatives or

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Speaker 1: their work. Really, about anyone doing something in public, especially women,

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Speaker 1: unless they are causing harm, I simply have nothing to say.

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Speaker 1: Lee wrote this shortly after Pamela Anderson had been invited

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Speaker 1: to criticize Megan Markle's TV show as copying her own.

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Speaker 1: Anderson didn't accept the invitation. No, she didn't see Markle's

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Speaker 1: show as copying her own, she said. Lee admired Anderson's response.

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Speaker 1: It can be tempting to see others as competitors, and

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Speaker 1: maybe on some level, Markle's show is competing with Anderson's

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Speaker 1: show for viewers, But there are so many shows in

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Speaker 1: this world, and so many potential ways to spend our

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Speaker 1: leisure time. When people see each other as nothing but competition,

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Speaker 1: everyone loses. So Lee's rule might be a good one

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Speaker 1: for all of us to adopt. Unless you are publishing

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Speaker 1: a thoughtful review, resist the temptation to criticize. Definitely, don't

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Speaker 1: try to elevate yourself by putting down others. If, like Lee,

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Speaker 1: you make this a policy, it can get easier in

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Speaker 1: any given moment. You can just remember your rule. If

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Speaker 1: someone makes fun of a colleague's mishap during a presentation

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Speaker 1: and invites you to join in, don't take the bait.

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Speaker 1: If you are an interior designer and you are asked

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Speaker 1: what you think about another designer's recent work at a

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Speaker 1: restaurant you frequent, say you are eager to see it

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Speaker 1: or compliment it, or if you have seen it and

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Speaker 1: don't like it, say something like people seem to be

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Speaker 1: excited about it. Any of those statements are fine. You

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Speaker 1: actually don't have to criticize it. In your volunteer life

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Speaker 1: and personal life, don't criticize either. If someone asks why

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Speaker 1: the fundraising event that you hired seems so successful while

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Speaker 1: another similar event wasn't just comment that there are so

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Speaker 1: many factors going into an event, or note that every

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Speaker 1: dollar raised helps the organization to be honest. Well, sometimes

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Speaker 1: criticism is fun. It doesn't generally make for great conversation

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Speaker 1: or for building a great professional community. We are all

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Speaker 1: trying to do what we can. There is enough space

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Speaker 1: for many books on similar topics, or many movies or

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Speaker 1: many albums. Plus, it is not bad to be seen

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Speaker 1: as a person who is a bit above the fray.

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Speaker 1: The fray can turn in all sorts of ways. In general,

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Speaker 1: being above it is the place to be In the meantime,

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Speaker 1: this is Laura. Thanks for listening, and here's to making

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Speaker 1: the most of our time. Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast.

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Speaker 1: If you've got questions, ideas, or feedback, you can reach

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Speaker 1: me at Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. Before Breakfast

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Speaker 1: is a production of iHeartMedia. For more podcasts from iHeartMedia,

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Speaker 1: please visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you

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Speaker 1: listen to your favorite shows.