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Speaker 1: All right, so hopefully folks aren't tired of fear my

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Speaker 1: voice first, which means that we've got a bestI episode

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Speaker 1: lined up for you in this case, Well, this will

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Speaker 1: be the end of our little run here of some

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Speaker 1: of your time down there in Florida, while my family

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Speaker 1: and I we.

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Speaker 2: Figure some of this stuff out to do back to

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Speaker 2: original programming. Yes, yeah, very soon here on the next episode. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: but this episode that we're going to reair is it

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Speaker 2: is one of my favorites because you and I there's

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Speaker 2: it's so good. So many people point to the fact

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Speaker 2: that you need a financial advisor or something like that,

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Speaker 2: but and it's not that it's not helpful for some folks,

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Speaker 2: but in reality, you and I we believe that a

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Speaker 2: financial coach can be so much more helpful.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, a financial coach as opposed to an.

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Speaker 2: Advisor like us, Yeah, less expensive and more likely to

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Speaker 2: be able to help you with some of those day

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Speaker 2: to day money things like you're learning instead of just

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Speaker 2: kind of having someone take over on your behalf.

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Speaker 3: Sure.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, so well in so Much America, by the way,

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Speaker 2: is one of the coolest best financial shows there.

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Speaker 3: So yeah, absolutely.

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Speaker 1: I think one of the differences too is like there's

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Speaker 1: a difference between just knowing some of the rules, which

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Speaker 1: is what cfp's oftentimes we're focused on, as opposed to

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Speaker 1: the behavior. And that's one of the things that Erica

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Speaker 1: addresses in this conversation, and it still resonates with me

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Speaker 1: because I remember we talked about, well, why can't you

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Speaker 1: just get a friend because you and I were buds,

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Speaker 1: Why can't you just get a friend to hold you

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Speaker 1: responsible like they're impacting your behavior? But she had a

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Speaker 1: fantastic answer as to why it is that she is

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Speaker 1: going to be more effective than even.

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Speaker 3: Your best bud.

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Speaker 2: And sometimes sometimes you just need someone to walk alongside

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Speaker 2: you for all those specific questions that come up along

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Speaker 2: the way as for making progress, and a financial coach

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Speaker 2: can be just that, AND's exactly if you want to

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Speaker 2: hear from one of the best ones out there, someone

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Speaker 2: with a lot of wisdom and a lot of perspective.

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Speaker 2: Make sure to listen to this episode. There's a lot

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Speaker 2: of great advice in it. So yeah, let's get to

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Speaker 2: that combo with Erica Taylor. Here we go, Welcome to

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Speaker 2: How the Money.

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Speaker 1: I'm Joel and I am Matt.

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Speaker 2: And today we're talking why you need a money coach

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Speaker 2: in your Corner with Erica Young.

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Speaker 3: So our guest.

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Speaker 1: Today, Erica Young is the financial coach that she never had.

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Speaker 1: As a Newlywood couple, Erica and her husband they discovered

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Speaker 1: that it's actually pretty easy to become just like the

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Speaker 1: average US household that now has over one hundred and

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Speaker 1: fifty thousand dollars in debt. It's the norm, honestly, and

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Speaker 1: if you don't have a plan to avoid debt, you're

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Speaker 1: gonna likely find yourself falling into that trap. But that

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Speaker 1: is not the path that Erica continued along with. She

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Speaker 1: was determined to change her family tree and now she

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Speaker 1: helps others who are seeking financial freedom in their lives.

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Speaker 1: Erica started her company, Taylor Made Budgets, where she creates

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Speaker 1: custom plans for her clients that give them the tools

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Speaker 1: and the knowledge to cut their stress levels by increasing

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Speaker 1: their savings and decreasing their debt. That is what we're

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Speaker 1: talking about today. Erica, thank you so much for joining

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Speaker 1: us today on the podcast.

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Speaker 4: Thank you for having me pleasure to be here.

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Speaker 3: Erica. We're glad to have you.

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Speaker 2: And the first question we ask everybody who comes on

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Speaker 2: the show is what they like to splor John, because

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Speaker 2: that kind of tells us something about the guest pretty quickly.

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Speaker 2: Matt and I we like to sporgeh beer. Everybody knows that.

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Speaker 2: But what is it that you like to splorge on

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Speaker 2: in the here and now while you're being smart with

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Speaker 2: your money, you're saving and investing still for your future.

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Speaker 4: Yeah. Well, I love vacations, and I don't just like

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Speaker 4: a little getaway. I mean those are fine. Those are fine,

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Speaker 4: but I like to spend good money on great food,

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Speaker 4: a beautiful like a villa. I typically will go in

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Speaker 4: with some friends, do a couple's trip, and we do

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Speaker 4: the biggest and best that we can, honestly. Yeah, Like,

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Speaker 4: so that is my little guilty pleasure. I will spend

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Speaker 4: lots of money on vacation, and I plan to do

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Speaker 4: that for the rest of my life.

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Speaker 1: I want to travel with Erica's crude me too, I'm like,

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Speaker 1: and we're so used to just like sort of slumming it.

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Speaker 3: Like we go to the beach often.

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Speaker 1: I mean every summer we go to the beach together

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Speaker 1: with our families, and it's a fine balance between finding

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Speaker 1: the absolute cheapest place but something that's nice enough to

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Speaker 1: keep our families happy, but probably not roach infested, but

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Speaker 1: nothing that we would call a villa. Yeah yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: yeah yeah, we haven't done the villa thing.

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Speaker 3: That sounds nice.

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Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, it's great. It's so much fun and

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Speaker 4: it's so much more, you know, economical, when you've got

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Speaker 4: a bunch of people with you.

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Speaker 1: Yes, it's very true when you do this. How many

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Speaker 1: how many couples typically do you like to like? I

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Speaker 1: feel like there's an optimal range because above a certain

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Speaker 1: amount it starts, there's there's drama. They may they may

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Speaker 1: as well be filming because we're gonna make this reality show.

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Speaker 4: You are correct about that. Now, last year we did

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Speaker 4: six couples, but I've I've been on a cruise with fifteen.

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Speaker 1: So fifteen couples.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, yeah, so cruise you can facilitate that a

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Speaker 4: lot easier. But what I'll say is, I mean, you know,

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Speaker 4: you just take people you like, and then you have

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Speaker 4: to weed out those that don't work so well.

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Speaker 2: Right, It's amazing too how people that you like at

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Speaker 2: home maybe you don't travel the same with ms, So

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Speaker 2: you have to kind of I figure out who makes

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Speaker 2: a good travel companion. Not every good body actually turns

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Speaker 2: out to be a great travel buddy.

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Speaker 4: That's true too. I have learned that as well.

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Speaker 3: Well.

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Speaker 1: Hopefully you're able to remain friends with America even though

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Speaker 1: it did work out at the villa. But let's talk

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Speaker 1: about debt, because you and your husband, y'all were newly

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Speaker 1: weeds and you were like around ninety thousand dollars in debt,

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Speaker 1: So we want to hear your story a little bit here.

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Speaker 1: What kinds of debt had you racked up? And specifically too,

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Speaker 1: how did you get to the point where you realized

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Speaker 1: that having that much debt, that that was a problem

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Speaker 1: for y'all.

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Speaker 4: Honestly, we were pretty normal. I mean this was twenty

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Speaker 4: going on twenty five years ago, to be honest, and

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Speaker 4: we were normal. We had credit card debt between the

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Speaker 4: two of us, we had about seven credit cards. None

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Speaker 4: of them were super duper high, but when you've got

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Speaker 4: that many, it's a lot to juggle. And then we

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Speaker 4: also had car debt, two cars between us, and we

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Speaker 4: had student loans, which was the biggest portion of it.

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Speaker 4: So more than half of that ninety thousand was in

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Speaker 4: student loans, and that was normal. Honestly, everyone expects to

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Speaker 4: have a car note, everybody expects to have a credit

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Speaker 4: card or two. And then of course you can't get

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Speaker 4: out of college quote unquote without college debt, so it

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Speaker 4: was pretty normal. We didn't have anything that we were

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Speaker 4: really overspending on. This is actually how we started our life.

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Speaker 4: We got out of college and this is what we had.

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Speaker 4: It wasn't abnormal at the time, and so that's part

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Speaker 4: of the challenge is that we're told that it's okay,

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Speaker 4: and so we do it. And when I was an

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Speaker 4: engineer working in in corporate America and my husband was

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Speaker 4: a sales professional, there were a few moments in those

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Speaker 4: early months of our relationship when we got married that

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Speaker 4: we realized, hold on a second, there's so much more

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Speaker 4: month left, and we don't have enough money. So between

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Speaker 4: the car payments and the student loans and all that,

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Speaker 4: we started to realize, gosh, there's not a whole lot left,

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Speaker 4: even though we're working professionals, you know, And so we

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Speaker 4: realized that we needed a game plan. And that's when

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Speaker 4: we started to have the revelation that, man, if I

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Speaker 4: can't go to lunch with my coworkers and I'm an engineer,

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Speaker 4: there's a bigger problem here.

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Speaker 2: So it's not like your salary was crummy as an engineer,

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Speaker 2: like you probably are making decent.

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Speaker 4: Money exactly exactly and so, but we also had decent debt, right,

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Speaker 4: so our debt payments amounted to over one thousand dollars

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Speaker 4: a month. And then you add on that we had

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Speaker 4: a baby quick, you know, in the first year and

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Speaker 4: a half of our marriage, and then we had another

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Speaker 4: one three four years later, and so you know, you

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Speaker 4: start compounding these things, and life is expensive and you're

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Speaker 4: not sure what you're supposed to be doing. So we

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Speaker 4: quickly realized. I mean, honestly, I'm kind of glad that

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Speaker 4: it happened early because we were foolish enough to believe

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Speaker 4: that anything was possible, so we went after it, and that,

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Speaker 4: you know, forced us to get real with our money

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Speaker 4: early on. When a lot of my clients today they

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Speaker 4: have waited until they are forties and fifties and they're like,

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Speaker 4: oh my gosh, my kids are going to college and

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Speaker 4: now I need to get my act together. So you know,

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Speaker 4: there are benefits to tripping over yourself earlier.

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Speaker 2: That's true, learning some lessons before you get too far along.

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Speaker 2: I love what you said that you said we were

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Speaker 2: pretty normal and there's so many people that have, you know,

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Speaker 2: tens of thousands dollars with the student loan debt, and

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Speaker 2: they're like, I see the headlines. I'm not as bad

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Speaker 2: off as some of those folks. And they've got a

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Speaker 2: little bit of credit card to your debt here. They

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Speaker 2: got a little bit of card debt over here. And

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Speaker 2: it's like, well that, but that's normal, right, I'm actually

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Speaker 2: maybe I'm doing a little bit better than average even.

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Speaker 2: But you began to realize that this wasn't the normal

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Speaker 2: you wanted to live in. So so how did you

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Speaker 2: and your husband and young kiddos, how did y'all start

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Speaker 2: tackling that debt? What was your approach to paying it down?

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Speaker 4: Well, the first thing that my husband did was he

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Speaker 4: actually took my credit card away from me because I

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Speaker 4: was the one that confession. Yes, this was confession time.

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Speaker 4: Like I was swiping that car to have lunch. I

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Speaker 4: was swiping that car to do the things that did

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Speaker 4: not fit inside of our normal routine or what we

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Speaker 4: could use in our checking account. And and so it

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Speaker 4: was confession time. And I had to share that because honestly,

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Speaker 4: I can't we can't continue to go into deb if

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Speaker 4: we're really trying to get out. So something has to

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Speaker 4: stop here. And so that was, you know, a real

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Speaker 4: honest moment that we had to have. And so he

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Speaker 4: literally put it in a bowl of ice and it

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Speaker 4: will put it in a bowl of water, put it

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Speaker 4: in a braezer so it could turn into ice. And

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Speaker 4: it was before those times when you plugged in your

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Speaker 4: account number or your debit card number into Amazon or exactly.

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Speaker 4: And so that was the restraint, you know, and the

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Speaker 4: physical representation of we're not doing this anymore. And then honestly,

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Speaker 4: we just added up all of our expenses. I mean

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Speaker 4: a lot of people are very nervous to add up

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Speaker 4: and look at in face how much they spend on

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Speaker 4: a monthly basis. And when we did that, we realized

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Speaker 4: there was opportunity. It wasn't what we thought it was

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Speaker 4: going to look like, and we had to face that

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Speaker 4: and just say, okay, so now what are we going

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Speaker 4: to do about it? So I think a reality check

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Speaker 4: is the very first step for lots of people.

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Speaker 3: That's true.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, So okay, so as you started down this path,

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Speaker 1: did you have any setbacks along the way. Well, I'm

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Speaker 1: going to go ahead and kind of reveal I'll spill

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Speaker 1: the beans, because I know you had some car issues.

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Speaker 1: You have some car problems, and you did have to

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Speaker 1: go back into debt. But I guess what I specifically

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Speaker 1: want to know is how did you keep that from

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Speaker 1: derailing you? Because I think sometimes when you've got this,

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Speaker 1: you've got this goal up ahead of you and you

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Speaker 1: know this is something you want to achieve, but then

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Speaker 1: you kind of get hit with this hurdle something, it

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Speaker 1: might derail you a little bit. So I want to

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Speaker 1: know how you were able to overcome that and continue

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Speaker 1: pressing on towards that goal of yours. Yeah.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, So our car died. Our car died and head

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Speaker 4: it needed an engine, and we did not have the

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Speaker 4: thousand dollars that was needed in order for us to

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Speaker 4: get that car resurrected, and so we went without a

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Speaker 4: car for a season, really just a month when I

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Speaker 4: was with the new child and my husband was able

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Speaker 4: to go to work. But then we got another car loan,

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Speaker 4: and so what we realized was, man, Okay, so if

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Speaker 4: we're not prepared, then that means we go further into debt.

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Speaker 4: And that was kind of the last straw, That was

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Speaker 4: the last thing that we said, all right, we had

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Speaker 4: to add this to our debt. That's what put us

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Speaker 4: over that ninety thousand, and so we said, all right,

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Speaker 4: let's let's figure this out. We added everything up, and

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Speaker 4: we just said, we can't be back in this place

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Speaker 4: again where we are unprepared, meaning we don't have anything

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Speaker 4: in savings and we can't weather an emergency. And so

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Speaker 4: that was the first thing we did, was get a

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Speaker 4: little bit of an emergency fund so that we didn't

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Speaker 4: have to depend on credit cards. And then we started

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Speaker 4: tackling the debt seriously at that point so that we,

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Speaker 4: you know, could reduce our expenses because honestly, having over

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Speaker 4: a thousand or twelve hundred dollars a month going out

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Speaker 4: in payments was also why we couldn't afford to get

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Speaker 4: the car fixed. And so those are the things that

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Speaker 4: we started to realize and say, okay, early on, if

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Speaker 4: we get this right now, then maybe we don't have

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Speaker 4: to return to this place again.

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Speaker 3: I love it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, So it sounds like that instead of that hampering

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Speaker 1: your ability to reach the likecle, it just poured some

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Speaker 1: fuel on the fire and it caused you to maybe

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Speaker 1: get after it even more than you were.

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Speaker 4: Before it did. Yeah, And I think we were also

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Speaker 4: committed to the fact that, you know, we wanted something

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Speaker 4: different than what we grew up with. The truth of

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Speaker 4: the matter is that both of my husband and I

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Speaker 4: came from single parent households, and we saw our mom

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Speaker 4: struggle and we said, well, we've got two incomes. We

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Speaker 4: should be able to do a little bit better than that,

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Speaker 4: right we and so we knew that there was something

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Speaker 4: to this, but we couldn't. You know, we tripped over

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Speaker 4: ourselves a little bit in the beginning, but it takes

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Speaker 4: the termination and it takes resolved, and so we were

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Speaker 4: on the same page where that was concerned. Sometimes the

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Speaker 4: methods weren't exactly the same because you're never gonna always agree,

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Speaker 4: but it was good to know that, like, we had

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Speaker 4: the same type of foundation because we really just wanted

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Speaker 4: to make sure that we had a better future for

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Speaker 4: our kids than what we hit.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's good to know. And Matt and I've talked

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Speaker 2: about this before. Being on the same team, recognizing that

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Speaker 2: you're on the same team when a setback happens, it

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Speaker 2: keeps you from pointing fingers at each other. You're like,

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Speaker 2: wait a second, we're on the same team. This setback

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Speaker 2: affects us both, and so let's find a way to

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Speaker 2: overcome this hurdle together. And I got to say, sometimes

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Speaker 2: I'm overly optimistic. And my wife tells me that often,

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Speaker 2: like she loves my optimism, but she's also like, it

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Speaker 2: also greats on me sometimes because you're completely unrealistic. And

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Speaker 2: so I have to realize too that when I'm saying, oh,

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Speaker 2: it's gonna take me thirty minutes to do this repair

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Speaker 2: around the house, knowing that it's probably actually, you know,

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Speaker 2: likely going to take me an hour and a half

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Speaker 2: to do that task. Sometimes when it comes to a

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Speaker 2: debt payoff plan, you have to have a little bit

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Speaker 2: of realism so that that one hurdle it doesn't send

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Speaker 2: you reeling. And so knowing building in some place for

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Speaker 2: imperfection I think is important in that plan too, right.

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Speaker 4: Right, absolutely, And don't expect for perfection from your partner. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: because you know that you aren't perfect either, right, Like,

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Speaker 4: it's super easy to point out finger at someone else

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Speaker 4: because you can see their flaws. You don't want anyone

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Speaker 4: to see yours, right, And so I love the fact

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Speaker 4: that you even said, you know, we we have to

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Speaker 4: remember that we're a team. One of the things my

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Speaker 4: husband still does to this day is say out loud,

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Speaker 4: we're on the same team. Like he says it to

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Speaker 4: remind himself and to remind me we're on the same team.

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Speaker 4: We want to go the same place. And so while

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Speaker 4: we may not agree on sometimes the method, that still

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Speaker 4: means that we need to figure out how we're going

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Speaker 4: to get we're going to you know, where we're going

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Speaker 4: to go together.

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Speaker 2: So okay, so it took you how long to pay

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Speaker 2: off that debt? And how did you celebrate at the

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Speaker 2: end of that debt payoff?

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Speaker 3: Did you what did you do?

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Speaker 4: That's awesome? Well, it took us about five years. We

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Speaker 4: had two kids in that time. We had another setback

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Speaker 4: was my husband got laid off. You know, we've had

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Speaker 4: a lot. We had a family loss where we had emergencies,

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Speaker 4: we have to use our emergency fund and all of that.

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Speaker 4: So there was a lot going on in there. I

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Speaker 4: do think, and this is the reason why I do

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Speaker 4: what I do. I do think that we could have

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Speaker 4: made some different decisions and gotten it paid off a

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Speaker 4: little bit faster if we had a coach. And that's

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Speaker 4: why I jumped in to do this work, is to

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Speaker 4: help people to avoid some of the pitfalls so that

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Speaker 4: they too can get out of debt faster than they

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Speaker 4: would have on their own. And we celebrated a long

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Speaker 4: the way. I'll be very honest and say, when we

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Speaker 4: paid off a car, we celebrated, And so for us,

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Speaker 4: you know, sometimes that was just a nice, fancy dinner

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Speaker 4: when we paid everything off. Honestly, I walked away from

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Speaker 4: my job like that was the biggest thing. That I

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Speaker 4: could lead that position and start the work that I

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Speaker 4: wanted to do myself. And so that was a huge

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Speaker 4: financial change in our house. But it was one of

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Speaker 4: the biggest reasons why getting out of debt was so

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Speaker 4: critical for us, because it just created an opening for

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Speaker 4: us to be able to, you know, change the way

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Speaker 4: we do life. And I've not looked back. It's been

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Speaker 4: seventeen years and I have no regrets at all. No,

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Speaker 4: I wasn't making today money back then when I first started,

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Speaker 4: but because we were out of debt, we can do it.

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Speaker 4: And you know, with little kids, sometimes that's the biggest

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Speaker 4: thing that you need is to be able to have

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Speaker 4: some flexibility.

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Speaker 3: Uh huh, I bet, yeah.

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Speaker 1: So I mean, was that difficult to kind of transition

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Speaker 1: from that nicer high paying engineer job where you're going

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Speaker 1: out to lunch or maybe not because you're your credit

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Speaker 1: cards were frozen at that point. Bringing those leftovers to work,

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Speaker 1: that's how I roll. But even still, like, even when

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Speaker 1: you eliminate those those you know, a thousand bucks and

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Speaker 1: months in debt payments, I'm sure you're making more than

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Speaker 1: twelve thousand dollars a year, like you are going to

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Speaker 1: feel that impact of losing that income. Was that difficult

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Speaker 1: for you to know that you're taking a hit when

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Speaker 1: it came to your income.

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Speaker 4: It was an adjustment. It was definitely an adjustment, and

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Speaker 4: it took a couple of years in all truth to

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Speaker 4: get the business off and running the way I wanted

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Speaker 4: it to. But I didn't. I honestly didn't leave until

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Speaker 4: I did have some income in the business. It just

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Speaker 4: didn't replace the whole amount. And so yeah, I think, honestly,

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Speaker 4: I know this sounds crazy, but one of the bigger

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Speaker 4: sacrifices that we made during that time was that I

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Speaker 4: couldn't invest in my retirement right. So I wasn't doing

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Speaker 4: that and that was something that I had previously been doing.

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Speaker 4: And one of the biggest pieces of advice I would

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Speaker 4: give someone is probably have a bigger emergency fund than

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Speaker 4: I had.

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Speaker 1: So that part, what did y'all have at the time, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: at the time.

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Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, we had solidly three months, like we

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Speaker 4: didn't have to have like a whole year or anything

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Speaker 4: like that.

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Speaker 3: Good.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, And so I would if you're going to become

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Speaker 4: an entrepreneur and you're not really sure what your income

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Speaker 4: is going to look like, I would definitely expand that

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Speaker 4: at least six months, if not twelve, just to be

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Speaker 4: on the safe side. For me, that would have meant

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Speaker 4: staying longer at work, and we probably could have made

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Speaker 4: that happen. But I really felt strongly that it was

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Speaker 4: time for me to go, and so I now advised

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Speaker 4: people to do what I didn't know to do, which

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Speaker 4: is to have more money saved. But you know, I think, honestly,

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Speaker 4: I still have no regrets because it's it's been a

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Speaker 4: great ride, and it was the time that I needed

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Speaker 4: to go, and quite frankly, we've been able to overcome that, right.

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Speaker 4: So it just took a little bit. It's slow, slow,

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Speaker 4: now for not.

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Speaker 2: The ideal way to do it, but you got through it.

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Speaker 2: And then now you're coaching other people to do it

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Speaker 2: even better, which I love and I love to just

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Speaker 2: that reality, the realization that that an emergency fund that's

403
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Speaker 2: even specific to an individual or an individual situation. It's like, Hey,

404
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Speaker 2: you're gonna want to you want to quit your job,

405
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Speaker 2: become an entrepreneur. You need more runway, you need more

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Speaker 2: financial backup. But let's say you dual income, great jobs

407
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Speaker 2: that aren't going anywhere, you know, have Yeah, you can

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Speaker 2: have a smaller emergency fund, and that's okay. I want

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Speaker 2: to ask you too about that transition to coaching that

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Speaker 2: you talked about, you know you talked about it took

411
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Speaker 2: me five years. I think we could have done it faster.

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Speaker 2: I want to basically help other people learn from the

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Speaker 2: things that I was learning along the way. That if

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Speaker 2: I had known that from the get go, it probably

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Speaker 2: would have happened a little bit quicker. Talk to me

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Speaker 2: more about how that fostered in you, that desire to

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Speaker 2: help others and what actually like kind of plunged you

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Speaker 2: into you know what, I have to do this full

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Speaker 2: time as a job.

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Speaker 4: Yeah. Well, what's interesting is that because of our journey,

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Speaker 4: I had people asking me questions. I wasn't silent about

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Speaker 4: the fact that we were trying to get out of debt.

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Speaker 4: So there would be times where we would say no

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Speaker 4: to things, or we would say yes to something different,

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Speaker 4: or we were taking a class, or I was reading

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Speaker 4: a book. But I was immersing myself and the work

427
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Speaker 4: of trying to figure out how to get out and

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Speaker 4: stay out of debt. I was talking about my budget.

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Speaker 4: I was vocal, and so people would ask me questions.

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Speaker 4: My pastor asked me a question, he said, hey, would

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Speaker 4: you help somebody else do what you are doing? I said, sure, absolutely,

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Speaker 4: And so the first couple of clients, two or three

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Speaker 4: people that I worked with were pro bono, just to

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Speaker 4: kind of see if I liked it. And in that time,

435
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Speaker 4: I was like, I loved seeing the light bulb come on.

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Speaker 4: At that time, I was actually going to someone's house

437
00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:04,360
Speaker 4: and we were looking at their bank statements on the table,

438
00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:08,200
Speaker 4: and when there would be a pivotal moment like did

439
00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:11,800
Speaker 4: you know that you're dining out it's five hundred dollars

440
00:20:11,880 --> 00:20:16,000
Speaker 4: a month? Did you know that your kids' activities was

441
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:19,359
Speaker 4: costing you this much? And the light bulb comes on

442
00:20:19,440 --> 00:20:21,320
Speaker 4: and they're like, wow, I had no idea. I thought

443
00:20:21,359 --> 00:20:22,919
Speaker 4: it was so much less than that, and then they

444
00:20:22,920 --> 00:20:27,359
Speaker 4: start to realize why things have been so challenging. I

445
00:20:27,440 --> 00:20:29,280
Speaker 4: used to go. I actually went into someone's home, and

446
00:20:29,359 --> 00:20:32,720
Speaker 4: I saw immediately why they were in debt. They were

447
00:20:32,960 --> 00:20:36,000
Speaker 4: not a hoarder necessarily, but they had tons and tons

448
00:20:36,080 --> 00:20:39,360
Speaker 4: of things for their kids all over their place, and

449
00:20:39,480 --> 00:20:42,399
Speaker 4: so it was very obvious. And so those are things

450
00:20:42,440 --> 00:20:49,440
Speaker 4: that looking back, give perspective to why people need somebody

451
00:20:49,560 --> 00:20:53,440
Speaker 4: to walk with them through the process versus just saying, oh,

452
00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:55,159
Speaker 4: I can do this on my own. And most of

453
00:20:55,160 --> 00:20:57,760
Speaker 4: the time people don't do it on their own. They

454
00:20:57,800 --> 00:20:59,320
Speaker 4: say they're going to do it. They're like, oh, I'm

455
00:20:59,320 --> 00:21:00,720
Speaker 4: going to give this some then I'm going to see

456
00:21:00,720 --> 00:21:02,400
Speaker 4: if I can do it myself, and then they realize

457
00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:02,919
Speaker 4: they've done.

458
00:21:02,800 --> 00:21:04,520
Speaker 1: Absolutely no progress.

459
00:21:04,600 --> 00:21:07,760
Speaker 4: And so accountability is huge in getting people to move

460
00:21:07,800 --> 00:21:08,200
Speaker 4: the needle.

461
00:21:08,600 --> 00:21:09,879
Speaker 3: I love that. That's that's so good.

462
00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:12,760
Speaker 1: I mean accountability. There's many other reasons too why it

463
00:21:12,840 --> 00:21:15,840
Speaker 1: might make sense to have a financial coach in your corner.

464
00:21:15,840 --> 00:21:18,159
Speaker 1: We're gonna talk all about coaching, what it entails. We'll

465
00:21:18,160 --> 00:21:23,479
Speaker 1: get to all of that right after this break.

466
00:21:29,080 --> 00:21:30,600
Speaker 3: All right, we are back from the break.

467
00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:33,240
Speaker 2: We're still talking with Erica Young about why you need

468
00:21:33,240 --> 00:21:36,840
Speaker 2: a money coach in your corner, and I think, I mean, Erica,

469
00:21:36,920 --> 00:21:40,120
Speaker 2: you just set it up perfectly right that we always

470
00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:42,480
Speaker 2: say we're going to do something, getting around to it

471
00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:45,360
Speaker 2: is another matter. I am maybe the king of that.

472
00:21:45,600 --> 00:21:47,560
Speaker 2: I remember going back, going back to my college days,

473
00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:51,520
Speaker 2: my procrastination levels were basically superior to anyone else's. And

474
00:21:51,600 --> 00:21:54,159
Speaker 2: so I want to I want to know though from you, like,

475
00:21:54,320 --> 00:21:57,160
Speaker 2: what are the signs maybe that someone needs the help

476
00:21:57,200 --> 00:22:00,560
Speaker 2: of a financial coach who maybe like, how can someone

477
00:22:00,760 --> 00:22:04,600
Speaker 2: know that they should stop trying to do it on

478
00:22:04,640 --> 00:22:06,639
Speaker 2: their own and then they really just do need to

479
00:22:06,680 --> 00:22:08,760
Speaker 2: outsource that they need to hire someone to kind of

480
00:22:08,880 --> 00:22:10,720
Speaker 2: you give them the right kick in the butt.

481
00:22:10,960 --> 00:22:13,160
Speaker 4: Yeah. Well, one of the very first signs is that

482
00:22:13,200 --> 00:22:16,560
Speaker 4: you have debt that hasn't moved. Your debt is either

483
00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:20,960
Speaker 4: stagnant or it's growing, and so if you're not making

484
00:22:20,960 --> 00:22:24,560
Speaker 4: progress in that area, that's one sign. Another one is

485
00:22:24,800 --> 00:22:29,760
Speaker 4: wishful or magical thinking. So we like to believe that

486
00:22:29,800 --> 00:22:31,480
Speaker 4: we are better than we are, that we can do

487
00:22:31,520 --> 00:22:34,000
Speaker 4: this ourselves, or that at some point, just like with

488
00:22:34,040 --> 00:22:36,120
Speaker 4: weight loss, we're like, oh, I want to lose some pounds,

489
00:22:36,600 --> 00:22:38,760
Speaker 4: and then we're magically like, oh, it's going to take

490
00:22:38,800 --> 00:22:40,480
Speaker 4: me this amount of time. Well not if you don't

491
00:22:40,560 --> 00:22:45,000
Speaker 4: change something, right, Like, we're wishful thinking about lots of

492
00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:48,280
Speaker 4: things in our life, and so that could be also

493
00:22:48,359 --> 00:22:52,600
Speaker 4: something to wake up to. And then, honestly, I would say,

494
00:22:53,240 --> 00:22:56,040
Speaker 4: you know, if you realize that there are things in

495
00:22:56,080 --> 00:22:59,720
Speaker 4: your life that you want but you haven't been able

496
00:22:59,760 --> 00:23:04,000
Speaker 4: to achieve. So going on a nice vacation, having an

497
00:23:04,000 --> 00:23:08,679
Speaker 4: emergency fund, giving to organizations, or being a part of

498
00:23:08,720 --> 00:23:12,479
Speaker 4: something bigger than yourself, and those things have not been

499
00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:17,560
Speaker 4: able to happen. You're realizing that your goals are bigger

500
00:23:17,600 --> 00:23:20,679
Speaker 4: than your want to your actions are not lining up

501
00:23:20,720 --> 00:23:23,440
Speaker 4: with the vision that you have. And so sometimes a

502
00:23:23,520 --> 00:23:27,760
Speaker 4: coach can help you realize that what's missing really and

503
00:23:28,080 --> 00:23:30,080
Speaker 4: you know, the little kick in the tush that you

504
00:23:30,119 --> 00:23:34,120
Speaker 4: need in order to get started. So that's having somebody

505
00:23:34,160 --> 00:23:37,440
Speaker 4: on your team, side by side with you who's been

506
00:23:37,480 --> 00:23:39,919
Speaker 4: down the road and I've worked with hundreds of people.

507
00:23:41,560 --> 00:23:44,160
Speaker 4: It just helps you to see what you can't see.

508
00:23:44,200 --> 00:23:46,520
Speaker 4: I mean, sometimes we're just blind to what's really in

509
00:23:46,560 --> 00:23:46,840
Speaker 4: the way.

510
00:23:47,359 --> 00:23:49,879
Speaker 1: Absolutely we're maybe we could see what's going on in

511
00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:53,680
Speaker 1: other people's lives. Money on this right when it comes

512
00:23:53,680 --> 00:23:56,000
Speaker 1: to what you're spending your money on, it can be

513
00:23:56,040 --> 00:24:00,280
Speaker 1: difficult to recognize. And so yeah, I mean you're basically

514
00:24:00,359 --> 00:24:01,679
Speaker 1: saying this, and you said this before the break, but

515
00:24:01,720 --> 00:24:04,040
Speaker 1: it sounds like like that reality check is the first

516
00:24:04,160 --> 00:24:07,520
Speaker 1: thing that folks need to do. Do you have other

517
00:24:07,800 --> 00:24:09,760
Speaker 1: like do you have different tactics that you take with

518
00:24:09,880 --> 00:24:12,040
Speaker 1: different folks who come to you? Or like is it

519
00:24:12,080 --> 00:24:15,520
Speaker 1: one hundred percent customizable when you're catching somebody or yeah,

520
00:24:15,560 --> 00:24:17,639
Speaker 1: like are there a few steps that everyone should follow?

521
00:24:18,080 --> 00:24:21,600
Speaker 4: Yeah, there are steps everyone should follow. It's customizable once

522
00:24:21,640 --> 00:24:24,600
Speaker 4: I get to know who you are. So one, the

523
00:24:24,640 --> 00:24:27,040
Speaker 4: reality check, where you look at all of your income

524
00:24:27,119 --> 00:24:30,480
Speaker 4: and all of your outgo expenses specifically need to be

525
00:24:30,560 --> 00:24:33,560
Speaker 4: broken down by category. Look at that first. I typically say,

526
00:24:33,560 --> 00:24:36,080
Speaker 4: have a glass of wine, get some chocolate, put on

527
00:24:36,119 --> 00:24:39,280
Speaker 4: some move music, or have a candle burning something to

528
00:24:39,320 --> 00:24:41,479
Speaker 4: make you kind of get into that good mood. But

529
00:24:41,560 --> 00:24:44,800
Speaker 4: that's the first thing. And then I actually have an

530
00:24:44,800 --> 00:24:48,480
Speaker 4: assessment that I do with people to understand their behaviors

531
00:24:48,520 --> 00:24:52,600
Speaker 4: and their habits around money. And so there's a checklist.

532
00:24:52,720 --> 00:24:55,360
Speaker 4: If you will, you kind of go through and rate everything,

533
00:24:55,359 --> 00:24:57,760
Speaker 4: and I think it's really important for people to understand

534
00:24:58,080 --> 00:25:00,960
Speaker 4: what their behaviors currently are a tess what's really going

535
00:25:01,040 --> 00:25:05,600
Speaker 4: on here. That's huge. I also think that adding up

536
00:25:05,600 --> 00:25:08,239
Speaker 4: your debt and by that you might have to go

537
00:25:08,240 --> 00:25:10,560
Speaker 4: look at your credit report to make sure you're not

538
00:25:10,600 --> 00:25:15,040
Speaker 4: missing anything, but face where you are, because if you

539
00:25:15,119 --> 00:25:17,560
Speaker 4: don't do that, you don't know how you can get

540
00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:19,240
Speaker 4: to where you really need to be. It's kind of

541
00:25:19,280 --> 00:25:23,080
Speaker 4: like the GPS lady. She has to locate you right

542
00:25:23,240 --> 00:25:26,399
Speaker 4: where you are today, right before you put in that

543
00:25:26,640 --> 00:25:28,840
Speaker 4: address of where you're trying to go, so that you

544
00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:32,640
Speaker 4: can get the straightest, quickest path there. But you can't

545
00:25:32,720 --> 00:25:34,800
Speaker 4: get there if she doesn't know where you are. So

546
00:25:34,840 --> 00:25:38,000
Speaker 4: we've got to locate where you are first, and sometimes

547
00:25:38,040 --> 00:25:40,280
Speaker 4: that's the hardest part. Once people are able to face that,

548
00:25:40,359 --> 00:25:43,280
Speaker 4: then they're like, Okay, I think I'm open now to

549
00:25:43,400 --> 00:25:46,240
Speaker 4: hearing what Erica has to say about how we're going

550
00:25:46,320 --> 00:25:47,040
Speaker 4: to get this done.

551
00:25:47,359 --> 00:25:47,600
Speaker 3: Yeah.

552
00:25:47,640 --> 00:25:49,880
Speaker 2: Sometimes you got to take like all of the gloss,

553
00:25:49,920 --> 00:25:51,359
Speaker 2: all of the sheen off, and you got to like

554
00:25:51,400 --> 00:25:54,639
Speaker 2: look at all those naked numbers and all of them

555
00:25:54,680 --> 00:25:57,040
Speaker 2: not hiding anything, right, so that you can get a

556
00:25:57,119 --> 00:26:00,680
Speaker 2: full scope of what actually needs to happen. And Erica

557
00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:03,520
Speaker 2: your coaching business, it's called tailor made budgets, that's right,

558
00:26:03,560 --> 00:26:05,879
Speaker 2: And so it makes me think, like, what does it

559
00:26:05,920 --> 00:26:09,240
Speaker 2: take to create a budget that actually helps people? Because

560
00:26:09,280 --> 00:26:12,479
Speaker 2: some people are scared of the word budget. They think

561
00:26:12,520 --> 00:26:14,200
Speaker 2: of it as like a four letter word. So sure,

562
00:26:14,520 --> 00:26:16,040
Speaker 2: how do you help people create a budget that they

563
00:26:16,119 --> 00:26:19,160
Speaker 2: actually use, not one that just kind of like looks

564
00:26:19,160 --> 00:26:21,680
Speaker 2: good in an excel f aisle that gets quickly abandoned.

565
00:26:21,920 --> 00:26:24,920
Speaker 4: Yeah. One of the biggest things is to know the family,

566
00:26:24,960 --> 00:26:29,439
Speaker 4: know the household. Understand are there medical things going on

567
00:26:29,520 --> 00:26:32,440
Speaker 4: in the house? Are understand you know how old the

568
00:26:32,520 --> 00:26:35,280
Speaker 4: children are if there are kids in the house, Understand

569
00:26:35,400 --> 00:26:38,000
Speaker 4: what the goals are. Where do you see yourself in

570
00:26:38,080 --> 00:26:42,359
Speaker 4: six months? Why is this important making it customized to

571
00:26:42,400 --> 00:26:45,199
Speaker 4: that household. No budget should be exactly like the neighbor.

572
00:26:45,640 --> 00:26:48,520
Speaker 4: And so it's it's important to understand who it is

573
00:26:48,560 --> 00:26:51,280
Speaker 4: that I'm working with and make it realistic for them. So,

574
00:26:51,359 --> 00:26:55,600
Speaker 4: for instance, people have an affinity for you know, whole

575
00:26:55,760 --> 00:26:58,200
Speaker 4: or clean eating or what have you. I understand that

576
00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:01,399
Speaker 4: that could potentially cost a little bit more. I also

577
00:27:01,440 --> 00:27:04,800
Speaker 4: have to understand that the age of the kids makes

578
00:27:04,800 --> 00:27:08,440
Speaker 4: a difference the activities that kids are in and things

579
00:27:08,480 --> 00:27:11,359
Speaker 4: like that. So just knowing what the household is up

580
00:27:11,400 --> 00:27:15,159
Speaker 4: to if there are glaring red flags, that's one of

581
00:27:15,200 --> 00:27:17,560
Speaker 4: the things that over the years I have gotten a

582
00:27:17,600 --> 00:27:20,440
Speaker 4: whole lot better at making sure that I let people

583
00:27:20,520 --> 00:27:22,760
Speaker 4: know here's the big, hairy elephant in the room that

584
00:27:22,760 --> 00:27:26,320
Speaker 4: we've got to deal with, because if there were only

585
00:27:26,440 --> 00:27:29,480
Speaker 4: one thing to change, I want people to understand what

586
00:27:29,560 --> 00:27:31,719
Speaker 4: that thing is that's really going to make a difference

587
00:27:31,760 --> 00:27:34,720
Speaker 4: in their finances. So the budget can be very detailed

588
00:27:34,760 --> 00:27:38,080
Speaker 4: and it can be very realistic and tailored for that household,

589
00:27:38,480 --> 00:27:42,000
Speaker 4: but I'm always looking for that one thing that if

590
00:27:42,000 --> 00:27:45,240
Speaker 4: they only did that, it would transform everything. And so

591
00:27:45,400 --> 00:27:47,399
Speaker 4: I'm looking for that needle in the haystack. And sometimes

592
00:27:47,440 --> 00:27:51,320
Speaker 4: it's bigger than you think, but that's sometimes the thing

593
00:27:51,359 --> 00:27:55,720
Speaker 4: that will help people really get unstuck if you will.

594
00:27:55,280 --> 00:27:57,880
Speaker 1: Right, Well, I mean, can you share some examples, like

595
00:27:57,960 --> 00:27:59,359
Speaker 1: what are some of those red flags? What are some

596
00:27:59,400 --> 00:28:03,360
Speaker 1: of those big, big old budget busting line items that

597
00:28:03,440 --> 00:28:05,000
Speaker 1: are just wrecking people's finances.

598
00:28:05,240 --> 00:28:07,399
Speaker 4: Well, I'll start with some of the little ones that

599
00:28:07,480 --> 00:28:10,760
Speaker 4: everybody has right now. So one of those would be subscriptions,

600
00:28:11,000 --> 00:28:13,520
Speaker 4: so I'll have people add up all of their subscriptions.

601
00:28:13,760 --> 00:28:15,680
Speaker 4: I had one family do this a couple of years ago.

602
00:28:15,720 --> 00:28:17,840
Speaker 4: It's about one hundred and fifty dollars in subscriptions, and

603
00:28:17,880 --> 00:28:21,560
Speaker 4: I thought, wow, and this is not like cable. It's

604
00:28:21,800 --> 00:28:24,639
Speaker 4: all of the little Netflix and Hulu and gains for

605
00:28:24,680 --> 00:28:26,520
Speaker 4: the kids and all that added up to one hundred.

606
00:28:26,520 --> 00:28:29,919
Speaker 4: And they had no idea. And so we just go

607
00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:32,320
Speaker 4: through the process of what's needed and what isn't, what

608
00:28:32,359 --> 00:28:34,440
Speaker 4: do you use, which don't you use? And they cut

609
00:28:34,520 --> 00:28:35,760
Speaker 4: it down to like fifty bucks.

610
00:28:36,160 --> 00:28:36,520
Speaker 3: Nice.

611
00:28:36,560 --> 00:28:39,720
Speaker 4: Amazon is huge. Amazon all on its own right now

612
00:28:39,840 --> 00:28:43,360
Speaker 4: is big. And that is not always fifty bucks or

613
00:28:43,360 --> 00:28:46,120
Speaker 4: one hundred bucks. Is that's something in people will justify

614
00:28:46,160 --> 00:28:49,080
Speaker 4: it saying, well, we get diapers and we get groceries

615
00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:53,000
Speaker 4: or And I still think it's important to add up

616
00:28:53,040 --> 00:28:56,160
Speaker 4: what's happening at Amazon, because what it really is is

617
00:28:56,280 --> 00:29:00,719
Speaker 4: just convenient. You can potentially spend less money elsewhere and

618
00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:04,160
Speaker 4: all that if you pay attention to that. But a

619
00:29:04,200 --> 00:29:08,120
Speaker 4: lot of the times, the big learing flags are a

620
00:29:08,240 --> 00:29:10,800
Speaker 4: vehicle that's completely out of whack and doesn't make sense.

621
00:29:11,520 --> 00:29:14,320
Speaker 4: I typically will you know, the very last thing I

622
00:29:14,360 --> 00:29:18,120
Speaker 4: would even offer is that the house is too expensive expensive.

623
00:29:18,240 --> 00:29:23,800
Speaker 4: I don't typically go there with that unless it's absolutely necessary.

624
00:29:24,200 --> 00:29:27,560
Speaker 1: But you're undermining their security, like this is this is

625
00:29:27,600 --> 00:29:28,720
Speaker 1: our home? What are you talking about?

626
00:29:28,880 --> 00:29:32,360
Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't go there unless it's absolutely necessary. But

627
00:29:32,400 --> 00:29:35,080
Speaker 4: I have had people who are paying for college for

628
00:29:35,120 --> 00:29:38,440
Speaker 4: their kids taking it out of their retirement funds. That's

629
00:29:38,480 --> 00:29:41,400
Speaker 4: a big hairy red flag to me, you know, especially

630
00:29:41,440 --> 00:29:44,800
Speaker 4: when the kid isn't doing well right, and so that's

631
00:29:44,840 --> 00:29:47,440
Speaker 4: you know, tens of thousands of dollars potentially going down

632
00:29:47,440 --> 00:29:49,920
Speaker 4: the drain and the kid can get alone. I don't

633
00:29:49,920 --> 00:29:54,040
Speaker 4: want them to, but if it's your retirement versus their college,

634
00:29:54,400 --> 00:29:56,040
Speaker 4: I'm picking the retirement first.

635
00:29:56,400 --> 00:29:57,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I completely agree with you.

636
00:29:57,880 --> 00:29:59,880
Speaker 2: It makes makes you think everything in life is t

637
00:30:00,200 --> 00:30:02,720
Speaker 2: off right, and that's especially the case with our money.

638
00:30:02,960 --> 00:30:06,200
Speaker 2: So that's kind of what you're you're walking people through too.

639
00:30:06,280 --> 00:30:08,640
Speaker 2: To a certain extent, is here's the thing, this is

640
00:30:08,680 --> 00:30:11,560
Speaker 2: what's kind of busting the budget over here. And obviously

641
00:30:12,520 --> 00:30:13,920
Speaker 2: we're gonna have to make some sort of trade off.

642
00:30:13,920 --> 00:30:15,720
Speaker 2: Maybe we got to sell this car and we got

643
00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:18,600
Speaker 2: to get into something more affordable. But how do you

644
00:30:18,680 --> 00:30:21,200
Speaker 2: talk to people how do you coach people into thinking

645
00:30:21,240 --> 00:30:24,400
Speaker 2: through trade offs with how they spend their money and

646
00:30:24,680 --> 00:30:27,280
Speaker 2: kind of the things that they can be doing without

647
00:30:27,280 --> 00:30:27,880
Speaker 2: money instead.

648
00:30:28,200 --> 00:30:31,400
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, really, I ask a bunch of questions. It's

649
00:30:31,440 --> 00:30:34,840
Speaker 4: really okay. So tell me more about this loan. How

650
00:30:34,880 --> 00:30:36,560
Speaker 4: long is it, how long have you had it? Tell

651
00:30:36,600 --> 00:30:40,040
Speaker 4: me about you know, tell me about the vehicle, right like, honestly,

652
00:30:40,400 --> 00:30:43,680
Speaker 4: for families who have little kids, they need a certain

653
00:30:43,760 --> 00:30:45,320
Speaker 4: kind of vehicle. They're not going to be able to

654
00:30:45,360 --> 00:30:48,800
Speaker 4: be in an escort, for instance. Right, yeah, so I

655
00:30:48,840 --> 00:30:51,960
Speaker 4: want to understand. I ask a bunch of questions, and

656
00:30:52,000 --> 00:30:54,080
Speaker 4: then I'll say things like, how was that serving you?

657
00:30:55,280 --> 00:30:58,680
Speaker 4: Is this helpful? Is this necessary? What could you do differently?

658
00:30:58,800 --> 00:31:01,800
Speaker 4: I want them to open up up and share their thoughts.

659
00:31:02,440 --> 00:31:05,640
Speaker 4: And really, when I look at the overall assessment of

660
00:31:05,920 --> 00:31:09,080
Speaker 4: their situation, I see their budget, I see their assets,

661
00:31:09,160 --> 00:31:12,280
Speaker 4: I see their debt, and then if that is the

662
00:31:12,320 --> 00:31:16,680
Speaker 4: smoking gun, it's really okay. So if you did this,

663
00:31:16,880 --> 00:31:20,160
Speaker 4: if you made this one change, here is what's possible

664
00:31:20,480 --> 00:31:22,160
Speaker 4: you could get out of debt and this amount of

665
00:31:22,200 --> 00:31:25,360
Speaker 4: time versus this amount of time, or those dollars could

666
00:31:25,360 --> 00:31:28,360
Speaker 4: go towards your retirement future or you could say that

667
00:31:28,480 --> 00:31:32,560
Speaker 4: for your kids education. So it's really helping them to

668
00:31:32,600 --> 00:31:35,000
Speaker 4: see that something else is possible or one of their

669
00:31:35,000 --> 00:31:38,360
Speaker 4: goals could be achieved even faster if they made this

670
00:31:38,960 --> 00:31:42,800
Speaker 4: you know, big change if you will. And sometimes honestly,

671
00:31:42,840 --> 00:31:45,400
Speaker 4: people say, I'm not willing to make the change now,

672
00:31:45,440 --> 00:31:47,320
Speaker 4: but if we do A, B, and C, could we

673
00:31:47,400 --> 00:31:49,680
Speaker 4: get the same effect And it makes them start thinking

674
00:31:49,680 --> 00:31:51,600
Speaker 4: about things that they wouldn't have thought of before. So

675
00:31:51,680 --> 00:31:54,480
Speaker 4: that's awesome too. So you know, the truth is, I

676
00:31:54,680 --> 00:31:57,880
Speaker 4: want them to own their decision and so I really,

677
00:31:58,000 --> 00:32:00,120
Speaker 4: you know, ask all the questions that are necessary for

678
00:32:00,120 --> 00:32:01,600
Speaker 4: them to have their own light bulb moment.

679
00:32:02,040 --> 00:32:04,320
Speaker 2: That's that's so great because when you have the light

680
00:32:04,360 --> 00:32:06,600
Speaker 2: bulb yourself, as opposed to someone telling you what to do,

681
00:32:07,120 --> 00:32:09,160
Speaker 2: so much more impactful and you're more likely to make

682
00:32:09,320 --> 00:32:12,640
Speaker 2: a different decision moving forward. And when you've also connected

683
00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:16,240
Speaker 2: that trade off to this greater goal that you have,

684
00:32:16,520 --> 00:32:18,680
Speaker 2: you become so much more excited to make that Like,

685
00:32:18,680 --> 00:32:20,320
Speaker 2: wait a second, this car is holding me back. I

686
00:32:20,320 --> 00:32:22,200
Speaker 2: didn't even like the car. I didn't realize that that

687
00:32:22,240 --> 00:32:23,680
Speaker 2: was the problem. It wasn't that big of a deal

688
00:32:23,720 --> 00:32:25,760
Speaker 2: to me. But this other goal like we wanted that,

689
00:32:25,800 --> 00:32:28,000
Speaker 2: we want that villa every every summer, like we want

690
00:32:28,040 --> 00:32:30,480
Speaker 2: that sweet summer trip. And so I don't know, it's

691
00:32:30,520 --> 00:32:33,280
Speaker 2: amazing how when you connect the trade off to that

692
00:32:33,320 --> 00:32:36,520
Speaker 2: greater goal, it just completely changes the equation.

693
00:32:37,080 --> 00:32:39,959
Speaker 4: Absolutely, yep, absolutely, and they get to own their decision.

694
00:32:40,040 --> 00:32:43,240
Speaker 4: I really want people to feel like it was their

695
00:32:43,520 --> 00:32:53,000
Speaker 4: choice versus Erica's prodding and pushing. That's a conception because.

696
00:32:50,680 --> 00:32:53,480
Speaker 1: Planning the kernel and then they have to discover them

697
00:32:53,520 --> 00:32:55,080
Speaker 1: an idea and then they stumble upon it.

698
00:32:55,120 --> 00:32:56,680
Speaker 3: It's like, wait a minute, that was my idea, right,

699
00:32:56,720 --> 00:32:57,280
Speaker 3: that's right?

700
00:32:57,600 --> 00:33:00,120
Speaker 1: Well, I mean speaking of kind of like mind tricks,

701
00:33:00,160 --> 00:33:01,800
Speaker 1: you know better than anyone here, like doing this one

702
00:33:01,800 --> 00:33:05,120
Speaker 1: on one work. It's never just a numbers problem here. Oftentimes,

703
00:33:05,560 --> 00:33:07,800
Speaker 1: talk about like the dual role that you play in

704
00:33:07,880 --> 00:33:11,680
Speaker 1: helping people with some of their deeper rooted psychological issues

705
00:33:11,720 --> 00:33:14,840
Speaker 1: with money, alongside the need to provide some of the

706
00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:18,440
Speaker 1: education some that accountability where they might just be, you know,

707
00:33:18,480 --> 00:33:22,040
Speaker 1: missing some of that basic personal finance knowledge. I think

708
00:33:22,040 --> 00:33:24,479
Speaker 1: sometimes you might be diving in even deeper than you

709
00:33:24,520 --> 00:33:26,920
Speaker 1: realize when when you're trying as you're kind of unearthing

710
00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:29,440
Speaker 1: some of these some of these deeper issues, right.

711
00:33:29,560 --> 00:33:32,560
Speaker 4: Yeah, absolutely, I will say I'm not a marriage counselor,

712
00:33:33,000 --> 00:33:36,400
Speaker 4: I will say I'm not a therapist, if you will.

713
00:33:36,440 --> 00:33:40,720
Speaker 4: But but I get into some of the stuff that

714
00:33:40,880 --> 00:33:44,520
Speaker 4: couples need to understand or that a single person hasn't

715
00:33:44,960 --> 00:33:49,400
Speaker 4: allowed themselves to think about. So your money passed, right,

716
00:33:49,440 --> 00:33:52,120
Speaker 4: So all of the things that you learned as a

717
00:33:52,200 --> 00:33:56,360
Speaker 4: child coming up in your home of origin, and how

718
00:33:56,400 --> 00:33:58,480
Speaker 4: that is affecting you today. So, for instance, I'll just

719
00:33:58,520 --> 00:34:00,640
Speaker 4: talk about myself. I won't talk about a clo. But

720
00:34:00,880 --> 00:34:04,400
Speaker 4: like my husband and I, like I said, we grew

721
00:34:04,440 --> 00:34:07,640
Speaker 4: up in single parent households. We both saw financial dysfunction,

722
00:34:08,239 --> 00:34:11,560
Speaker 4: and you know, I saw a beast and famine lifestyle

723
00:34:11,760 --> 00:34:15,640
Speaker 4: all the time just to make ends me, as did he,

724
00:34:15,840 --> 00:34:19,759
Speaker 4: and so I interpreted that in a different way than

725
00:34:19,840 --> 00:34:22,560
Speaker 4: he did. He really likes to have, you know, he

726
00:34:22,600 --> 00:34:25,560
Speaker 4: wants to stack cash that cash, and I'm more of

727
00:34:25,600 --> 00:34:27,439
Speaker 4: the longer term. I want to make sure I'm okay

728
00:34:27,440 --> 00:34:30,239
Speaker 4: in the future, because I was always worried that I'd

729
00:34:30,280 --> 00:34:32,920
Speaker 4: have to take care of my parents. And so the

730
00:34:32,960 --> 00:34:37,200
Speaker 4: way we interpreted our past experience affected how we did life.

731
00:34:37,320 --> 00:34:39,840
Speaker 4: And the funny thing is I'm a financial coach, and

732
00:34:39,880 --> 00:34:42,760
Speaker 4: he and I would differ on how much we needed

733
00:34:42,800 --> 00:34:45,880
Speaker 4: for savings because we had different ways that we interpreted

734
00:34:45,880 --> 00:34:46,360
Speaker 4: our past.

735
00:34:46,480 --> 00:34:47,439
Speaker 3: Did you ever put a card?

736
00:34:47,480 --> 00:34:49,080
Speaker 2: But I'm a money coach, so I get to make

737
00:34:49,120 --> 00:34:50,000
Speaker 2: the decision.

738
00:34:52,080 --> 00:34:56,440
Speaker 4: You know what. Sometimes that happens not but I will say, like,

739
00:34:56,880 --> 00:35:00,360
Speaker 4: those past experiences affect how we do life today, and

740
00:35:00,400 --> 00:35:03,759
Speaker 4: a lot of people don't put enough emphasis or give

741
00:35:03,800 --> 00:35:07,359
Speaker 4: themselves the freedom to sit back and think through how

742
00:35:07,440 --> 00:35:09,880
Speaker 4: that is showing up in life today. I had a

743
00:35:09,880 --> 00:35:13,319
Speaker 4: client who had their own realization about how dependent they

744
00:35:13,320 --> 00:35:16,440
Speaker 4: were on their parents' approval and how they spent their money,

745
00:35:16,960 --> 00:35:19,799
Speaker 4: and you know, the wife just really started crying and

746
00:35:19,920 --> 00:35:21,799
Speaker 4: just said, wow, I hadn't seen it that way. I

747
00:35:21,800 --> 00:35:24,040
Speaker 4: had no idea that I was looking for them to

748
00:35:24,080 --> 00:35:27,359
Speaker 4: be okay with my money decisions. And the husband said,

749
00:35:27,480 --> 00:35:31,239
Speaker 4: I'm so glad that we had this conversation because this

750
00:35:31,400 --> 00:35:34,680
Speaker 4: was worth all of the coaching because I didn't know

751
00:35:34,680 --> 00:35:36,839
Speaker 4: how to reach this point. I had no idea how

752
00:35:36,880 --> 00:35:39,560
Speaker 4: to get here. And now that he knows, now that

753
00:35:39,600 --> 00:35:44,000
Speaker 4: they both are aware of what she's allowed, you know,

754
00:35:44,040 --> 00:35:46,600
Speaker 4: she allowed her parents sort of to interfere and how

755
00:35:46,640 --> 00:35:50,640
Speaker 4: they manage their own money. Then they can work through that.

756
00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:53,920
Speaker 4: But they weren't. They didn't know that was that was happening.

757
00:35:53,960 --> 00:35:56,839
Speaker 4: And so those are things that we get into that's

758
00:35:56,960 --> 00:36:00,960
Speaker 4: beyond the numbers, that's you know, hidden some time behind. Oh,

759
00:36:01,000 --> 00:36:04,360
Speaker 4: we just need a budget. There's probably more reasons why

760
00:36:04,440 --> 00:36:07,359
Speaker 4: the budget hasn't worked in the past, and we've got

761
00:36:07,400 --> 00:36:09,439
Speaker 4: to get to some of those root issues in order

762
00:36:09,440 --> 00:36:10,759
Speaker 4: for you to really be able to stick with the

763
00:36:10,760 --> 00:36:11,239
Speaker 4: budget too.

764
00:36:11,520 --> 00:36:12,799
Speaker 3: Wow. I love that. I love it.

765
00:36:12,800 --> 00:36:14,400
Speaker 2: Thank you so much for sharing all that. I mean,

766
00:36:14,520 --> 00:36:17,520
Speaker 2: there's a lot of good, beautiful wisdom in there. And actually,

767
00:36:17,680 --> 00:36:20,239
Speaker 2: you know, you have so much good thoughts I think

768
00:36:20,280 --> 00:36:22,600
Speaker 2: around when it comes to money and relationships and how

769
00:36:22,680 --> 00:36:25,000
Speaker 2: couples can talk about money well together. Erica, we want

770
00:36:25,040 --> 00:36:28,160
Speaker 2: to ask you a few questions on that topic and

771
00:36:28,200 --> 00:36:29,759
Speaker 2: we'll get to those right after this.

772
00:36:39,000 --> 00:36:40,760
Speaker 1: All right, we're back from the break. We're still talking

773
00:36:40,920 --> 00:36:43,840
Speaker 1: about money coaching and Joel, you kind of tease to

774
00:36:44,520 --> 00:36:47,360
Speaker 1: money and relationships. Serica kind of got into how she's

775
00:36:47,600 --> 00:36:50,400
Speaker 1: you know, she plays. She gets to pretend to be

776
00:36:50,760 --> 00:36:53,080
Speaker 1: a couple's counselor every now and then before we kind

777
00:36:53,080 --> 00:36:55,239
Speaker 1: of talk more about relationship stuff. One of the things

778
00:36:55,320 --> 00:36:57,719
Speaker 1: you mentioned was that one of the roles that a

779
00:36:57,719 --> 00:37:00,600
Speaker 1: financial coach can play is accountability. Right, Like, they are

780
00:37:00,640 --> 00:37:04,440
Speaker 1: there keeping you accountable. Is it possible to get that

781
00:37:04,520 --> 00:37:09,120
Speaker 1: same benefit by having a friend provide that accountability. What

782
00:37:09,200 --> 00:37:10,840
Speaker 1: I want to ask here that the core my question is,

783
00:37:10,880 --> 00:37:12,919
Speaker 1: I want to know the difference between having a friend

784
00:37:12,920 --> 00:37:15,600
Speaker 1: that's holding you accountable and someone like you who's able

785
00:37:15,640 --> 00:37:18,239
Speaker 1: to provide more of that in depth, full service, one

786
00:37:18,280 --> 00:37:21,200
Speaker 1: on one coaching. Can you talk about that for a second.

787
00:37:21,680 --> 00:37:23,920
Speaker 4: Absolutely, I think everybody needs a friend that can hold

788
00:37:23,960 --> 00:37:28,720
Speaker 4: them accountable. However, most of the time pep our friends

789
00:37:28,760 --> 00:37:34,760
Speaker 4: wants happy. Our friends are very agreeable, and for women

790
00:37:35,320 --> 00:37:39,200
Speaker 4: sometimes that is a shopping buddy or someone who is

791
00:37:39,239 --> 00:37:41,560
Speaker 4: going to say, oh I understand, just do it. You

792
00:37:41,680 --> 00:37:46,279
Speaker 4: deserve it. And men don't say those things, but it

793
00:37:46,400 --> 00:37:48,880
Speaker 4: is inherent in Hey, let's go hang out with the

794
00:37:48,880 --> 00:37:50,719
Speaker 4: guys and we're going to do what we do, you

795
00:37:50,719 --> 00:37:52,760
Speaker 4: know what I mean? Like, we all have our ways

796
00:37:52,800 --> 00:37:55,960
Speaker 4: in which we live, and it's great to have a

797
00:37:56,000 --> 00:37:58,839
Speaker 4: buddy who's on the journey with you, but they're not

798
00:37:58,880 --> 00:38:01,719
Speaker 4: going to give you the tough love. They also will

799
00:38:01,760 --> 00:38:03,959
Speaker 4: not give you. You're not going to be super open

800
00:38:03,960 --> 00:38:06,319
Speaker 4: and honest with your friend. Let's just be clear. You're

801
00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:08,439
Speaker 4: not going to say how much you spent on dining out.

802
00:38:08,520 --> 00:38:10,840
Speaker 4: You are not going to say how much that dress costs.

803
00:38:10,840 --> 00:38:13,360
Speaker 4: You're not going to say how much golfing was with

804
00:38:13,480 --> 00:38:17,919
Speaker 4: the Fellaws, You're not You're going to simply gloss over

805
00:38:17,960 --> 00:38:21,560
Speaker 4: it because we inherently do not want the worst of

806
00:38:21,640 --> 00:38:25,520
Speaker 4: us to be seen by everybody. With me, you don't

807
00:38:25,520 --> 00:38:27,920
Speaker 4: have a choice on that first meeting. I mean, honestly,

808
00:38:28,080 --> 00:38:30,319
Speaker 4: my clients are paying me to be honest with them

809
00:38:30,920 --> 00:38:33,319
Speaker 4: because there's not a whole lot of other places where

810
00:38:33,320 --> 00:38:34,719
Speaker 4: they're going to be honest. They're not going to tell

811
00:38:34,760 --> 00:38:38,279
Speaker 4: family members, they're not going to tell friends. People are

812
00:38:38,320 --> 00:38:42,279
Speaker 4: embarrassed to shame. There's a lot of emotion around money.

813
00:38:42,719 --> 00:38:44,680
Speaker 4: They don't want their friends to know how much they make.

814
00:38:44,760 --> 00:38:47,239
Speaker 4: Let's just be clear that there's a lot that we

815
00:38:47,280 --> 00:38:51,920
Speaker 4: aren't sharing, so accountability can only go so far with

816
00:38:51,960 --> 00:38:54,160
Speaker 4: the people in our circles. One of the things that

817
00:38:54,200 --> 00:38:56,960
Speaker 4: I really enjoy about being a coach is that I'm

818
00:38:57,000 --> 00:39:00,719
Speaker 4: pretty anonymous, if you will, and so I'm not going to.

819
00:39:00,640 --> 00:39:04,000
Speaker 1: Show up at the front doormore.

820
00:39:05,160 --> 00:39:07,319
Speaker 4: I did that in the first couple of years. But

821
00:39:07,360 --> 00:39:10,680
Speaker 4: the cool thing is that I could literally have a

822
00:39:10,719 --> 00:39:14,680
Speaker 4: neighbor as a client and we might not even know

823
00:39:14,719 --> 00:39:16,160
Speaker 4: we're neighbors, right, and.

824
00:39:16,120 --> 00:39:22,200
Speaker 1: So nobody else knows, and that's so yeah, So the cool.

825
00:39:21,960 --> 00:39:24,960
Speaker 4: Thing is, like, that's the other thing is I'm asking

826
00:39:25,040 --> 00:39:28,279
Speaker 4: the hard questions right in the beginning, and once we

827
00:39:28,320 --> 00:39:31,800
Speaker 4: get the hard stuff done, we can work through everything else.

828
00:39:32,280 --> 00:39:34,360
Speaker 4: And I just you know, really have a system of

829
00:39:34,400 --> 00:39:36,120
Speaker 4: these are the things that we talk about and this

830
00:39:36,160 --> 00:39:38,640
Speaker 4: is what you ought to expect. And so in that

831
00:39:38,800 --> 00:39:43,919
Speaker 4: process is exactly how people really get to understand what

832
00:39:43,960 --> 00:39:46,680
Speaker 4: this looks like. And they get used to being vulnerable

833
00:39:46,719 --> 00:39:49,759
Speaker 4: and open. And because I'm a prouder, I ask a

834
00:39:49,800 --> 00:39:53,360
Speaker 4: bunch of questions. They they've got to get the answer.

835
00:39:53,520 --> 00:39:55,800
Speaker 4: And I actually so there have been times when I'm like,

836
00:39:55,800 --> 00:39:57,359
Speaker 4: I think you need to see a counselor for that.

837
00:39:57,520 --> 00:40:00,480
Speaker 4: I think I think that that's what makes sense here and.

838
00:40:00,320 --> 00:40:03,360
Speaker 2: Pushing them towards getting some actual help from a licensed therapist.

839
00:40:03,600 --> 00:40:07,399
Speaker 4: Yes, absolutely, especially for you know, in marriage, especially if

840
00:40:07,440 --> 00:40:10,439
Speaker 4: there's any type of emotional challenges that people are having.

841
00:40:10,480 --> 00:40:13,319
Speaker 4: I've I did that just recently, because I think that

842
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:16,680
Speaker 4: people think that if they get the money right, that

843
00:40:17,640 --> 00:40:19,839
Speaker 4: all of these other problems will be okay, like we'll

844
00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:22,160
Speaker 4: be able to communicate. Well, no, actually, I really need

845
00:40:22,200 --> 00:40:24,919
Speaker 4: you to have a solid foundation of communication first, yes,

846
00:40:25,080 --> 00:40:27,239
Speaker 4: because if we start talking about the money, it's just

847
00:40:27,280 --> 00:40:29,480
Speaker 4: going to uproot quite a bit of things. And if

848
00:40:29,480 --> 00:40:32,120
Speaker 4: you can't work through those things behind the scenes, that

849
00:40:32,160 --> 00:40:34,040
Speaker 4: can be challenging. So I know those are things that

850
00:40:34,160 --> 00:40:35,719
Speaker 4: just a frame probably wouldn't say.

851
00:40:35,880 --> 00:40:39,160
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, yeah, yeah, bad money fights, disagreements, how you

852
00:40:39,160 --> 00:40:42,479
Speaker 1: communicate about money like those are all just symptoms of

853
00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:45,640
Speaker 1: underlying either health or unhealth.

854
00:40:45,760 --> 00:40:46,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's right.

855
00:40:46,760 --> 00:40:49,840
Speaker 2: And you mentioned obviously you're not a marriage therapist, which

856
00:40:50,360 --> 00:40:55,319
Speaker 2: you know, but you have also a lot of wisdom, yeah,

857
00:40:55,360 --> 00:40:58,040
Speaker 2: based on twenty years plus of marriage right and through

858
00:40:58,160 --> 00:41:00,160
Speaker 2: helping hundreds of clients. So I am curious to to

859
00:41:00,160 --> 00:41:02,359
Speaker 2: talk to you a little bit about money and relationships.

860
00:41:02,719 --> 00:41:06,719
Speaker 2: You talk to us maybe about having productive money conversations,

861
00:41:06,760 --> 00:41:08,960
Speaker 2: like what if a couple keeps having the same fight

862
00:41:09,040 --> 00:41:11,680
Speaker 2: over and over, like the same money issue is kind

863
00:41:11,680 --> 00:41:14,000
Speaker 2: of at the root of those arguments, how can they

864
00:41:14,000 --> 00:41:18,080
Speaker 2: progress and get past those just the recurring. It feels

865
00:41:18,080 --> 00:41:20,200
Speaker 2: like it's a record on repeat, same thing over and over.

866
00:41:20,440 --> 00:41:22,879
Speaker 2: How can they maybe move forward past just the same

867
00:41:22,960 --> 00:41:24,080
Speaker 2: unproductive money fights.

868
00:41:24,320 --> 00:41:29,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, Well, first of all, any money conversation, I encourage

869
00:41:29,160 --> 00:41:32,600
Speaker 4: people to keep it very short, so we are not

870
00:41:32,760 --> 00:41:37,000
Speaker 4: going to have a three hour money summit on our

871
00:41:37,040 --> 00:41:42,200
Speaker 4: finances on day one. We're not so exhausting exactly. And

872
00:41:42,280 --> 00:41:45,279
Speaker 4: so I think where people tend to go wrong as

873
00:41:45,280 --> 00:41:46,840
Speaker 4: they say, oh, we're going to get this all together

874
00:41:46,920 --> 00:41:48,960
Speaker 4: and fix it and blah blah blah, and then they

875
00:41:49,000 --> 00:41:51,040
Speaker 4: wear each other out on day one and they don't

876
00:41:51,040 --> 00:41:52,719
Speaker 4: even come back to it for a couple of months

877
00:41:52,719 --> 00:41:55,600
Speaker 4: because it was so tiring. So do yourself a favor

878
00:41:55,719 --> 00:41:58,520
Speaker 4: and schedule fifteen or twenty minutes and talk about one

879
00:41:58,560 --> 00:42:02,880
Speaker 4: thing the other thing is, and you know ground rules

880
00:42:02,920 --> 00:42:05,279
Speaker 4: for whatever that one thing is, and how to you

881
00:42:05,320 --> 00:42:07,000
Speaker 4: know how you want to see it resolved in that

882
00:42:07,080 --> 00:42:10,400
Speaker 4: kind of thing and have a takeaway. But if you

883
00:42:10,480 --> 00:42:12,879
Speaker 4: are continuing to have the same fight over and over,

884
00:42:13,560 --> 00:42:16,239
Speaker 4: what I'm hearing is that one or both of you

885
00:42:16,280 --> 00:42:21,600
Speaker 4: are not being heard. So somebody is continually bringing up

886
00:42:21,600 --> 00:42:25,799
Speaker 4: the same subject because they feel unheard, or you keep

887
00:42:25,880 --> 00:42:29,120
Speaker 4: going back to that mountain that you can't climb because

888
00:42:29,200 --> 00:42:35,280
Speaker 4: somebody is not heard. And so one of the tricks

889
00:42:35,320 --> 00:42:38,920
Speaker 4: of communication and this is that you know, counselor therapist's

890
00:42:38,920 --> 00:42:44,440
Speaker 4: side is repeat what you believe you heard. Like it.

891
00:42:44,640 --> 00:42:47,680
Speaker 4: So what I hear you saying is blah blah blah

892
00:42:48,040 --> 00:42:53,520
Speaker 4: go or did you mean blah blah blah? Is this correct?

893
00:42:53,760 --> 00:42:57,800
Speaker 4: Blah blah blah? And then you know, the whole point

894
00:42:58,040 --> 00:43:02,560
Speaker 4: is why are they saying that? Tell me more about

895
00:43:02,960 --> 00:43:05,760
Speaker 4: why that's showing up. And so a lot of times

896
00:43:05,800 --> 00:43:09,040
Speaker 4: with money matters, we take it so very personally. We've

897
00:43:09,080 --> 00:43:13,200
Speaker 4: worked really hard for whatever income we're bringing in, or

898
00:43:13,360 --> 00:43:17,520
Speaker 4: we feel responsible for spending the money or taking care

899
00:43:17,560 --> 00:43:21,040
Speaker 4: of the household or whatever it is. And so it's

900
00:43:21,280 --> 00:43:24,520
Speaker 4: very sensitive or a lot of people because it hits

901
00:43:24,560 --> 00:43:28,400
Speaker 4: at the heart of time that you've put into whatever

902
00:43:28,440 --> 00:43:31,960
Speaker 4: it is. And so we've got to really listen. And

903
00:43:32,000 --> 00:43:35,760
Speaker 4: I think we're not really good at that with social media.

904
00:43:36,600 --> 00:43:39,680
Speaker 4: The idea that we can fast forward or rewind all

905
00:43:39,719 --> 00:43:43,280
Speaker 4: of our TV shows and all of that, we don't

906
00:43:43,320 --> 00:43:46,920
Speaker 4: have to listen. The stuff or the sound bites are

907
00:43:46,960 --> 00:43:50,320
Speaker 4: so short that it doesn't leave room for real human connection,

908
00:43:50,920 --> 00:43:53,839
Speaker 4: and so I think that we have to relearn how

909
00:43:53,840 --> 00:43:57,080
Speaker 4: to do that. But I also think we need to

910
00:43:57,400 --> 00:44:01,440
Speaker 4: not force either party because there's a money nerd and

911
00:44:01,480 --> 00:44:05,560
Speaker 4: there's a free spender in this equation, and we don't

912
00:44:05,600 --> 00:44:09,560
Speaker 4: want the nerd to overwhelm the free spirit by this,

913
00:44:09,719 --> 00:44:13,360
Speaker 4: you know, three hour long summit, fifteen or twenty minutes

914
00:44:13,440 --> 00:44:16,359
Speaker 4: on one topic. Let's understand how we're going to get

915
00:44:16,400 --> 00:44:19,279
Speaker 4: this one thing done and then move forward. And I

916
00:44:19,280 --> 00:44:21,759
Speaker 4: think if people will take those couple of tips, they'll

917
00:44:21,920 --> 00:44:23,680
Speaker 4: really it'll really be very helpful.

918
00:44:24,280 --> 00:44:24,919
Speaker 3: That's so great.

919
00:44:25,120 --> 00:44:28,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, you're you're talking about being financially naked

920
00:44:28,360 --> 00:44:31,120
Speaker 1: and vulnerable with your partner, Like, how else do you

921
00:44:31,120 --> 00:44:34,040
Speaker 1: you know you're talking about focusing fifteen minutes one topic,

922
00:44:34,040 --> 00:44:36,279
Speaker 1: you're talking about listening. Are there some other ways that

923
00:44:36,320 --> 00:44:38,640
Speaker 1: you would encourage couples to get on the same page

924
00:44:38,640 --> 00:44:40,880
Speaker 1: and work together to make this money progress? Those are

925
00:44:40,880 --> 00:44:42,879
Speaker 1: some great tips I would love if you had any more.

926
00:44:43,160 --> 00:44:47,160
Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah, So my book is called you know, Naked

927
00:44:47,200 --> 00:44:49,719
Speaker 4: and un a Shame for a reason. I think it's

928
00:44:49,760 --> 00:44:54,000
Speaker 4: really important for people to reveal some of the things

929
00:44:54,040 --> 00:44:58,400
Speaker 4: that have made them feel a certain way, Right, So

930
00:44:58,680 --> 00:45:01,160
Speaker 4: what have you been ashamed of? What do you wish

931
00:45:01,200 --> 00:45:04,880
Speaker 4: you hadn't done? Let's dream together. I think one of

932
00:45:04,920 --> 00:45:07,680
Speaker 4: the biggest ways that we can get on the same

933
00:45:07,760 --> 00:45:11,520
Speaker 4: page as a couple is to dream. What do you

934
00:45:11,560 --> 00:45:13,239
Speaker 4: see five or ten years down the line. Let's not

935
00:45:13,280 --> 00:45:15,719
Speaker 4: talk about the budget today. Let's talk about what do

936
00:45:15,760 --> 00:45:18,279
Speaker 4: you see in the future. What would you love to

937
00:45:18,280 --> 00:45:21,920
Speaker 4: see happen? Is there a business in your heart? How

938
00:45:21,920 --> 00:45:24,239
Speaker 4: do you want you know, what does retirement look like?

939
00:45:24,280 --> 00:45:26,240
Speaker 4: Would you love to see the kids go to college

940
00:45:26,280 --> 00:45:28,759
Speaker 4: and be able to participate in that? Like, what is

941
00:45:28,800 --> 00:45:31,440
Speaker 4: it that makes your heart light up? And get on

942
00:45:31,480 --> 00:45:34,439
Speaker 4: the same page there. Let's be a cheerleader for our

943
00:45:34,480 --> 00:45:38,200
Speaker 4: partner's future. Or let's say, oh my gosh, I had

944
00:45:38,200 --> 00:45:40,200
Speaker 4: no idea we were on the same page there. We

945
00:45:40,280 --> 00:45:42,879
Speaker 4: never talked about it. We don't give ourselves an opportunity

946
00:45:43,160 --> 00:45:46,400
Speaker 4: to think about down the line because we're so worried

947
00:45:46,920 --> 00:45:50,000
Speaker 4: about the things today. And so I think that that's

948
00:45:50,040 --> 00:45:51,960
Speaker 4: a really great way to get on the same page

949
00:45:52,680 --> 00:45:55,520
Speaker 4: and to fully understand what each other wants.

950
00:45:55,880 --> 00:45:57,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, what just a great thing to do as a

951
00:45:57,880 --> 00:46:00,239
Speaker 2: couple on so many levels, but on a money level too, Right,

952
00:46:00,880 --> 00:46:04,239
Speaker 2: just dreaming together. I think sometimes maybe, especially if you've

953
00:46:04,239 --> 00:46:07,080
Speaker 2: been married for the longer you've been together, sometimes it's

954
00:46:07,080 --> 00:46:10,560
Speaker 2: harder to retain some of the forward looking momentum and

955
00:46:10,560 --> 00:46:13,279
Speaker 2: some of the excitement about the future because you're in

956
00:46:13,320 --> 00:46:15,560
Speaker 2: the day to day, especially if you've got young kids

957
00:46:15,560 --> 00:46:17,880
Speaker 2: like Matt and I do. It's like life just overwhelms you,

958
00:46:17,920 --> 00:46:19,279
Speaker 2: and so you have to kind of come back to

959
00:46:19,280 --> 00:46:23,120
Speaker 2: the table and start dreaming together and reminding reminding each

960
00:46:23,120 --> 00:46:25,040
Speaker 2: other about what you love about one another, why you're

961
00:46:25,040 --> 00:46:26,360
Speaker 2: excited to build a life together.

962
00:46:26,880 --> 00:46:28,359
Speaker 1: I mean, I think one of the other things too,

963
00:46:28,480 --> 00:46:30,920
Speaker 1: that I'm learning I'm talking with some friends. Not everybody

964
00:46:31,160 --> 00:46:33,960
Speaker 1: are great dreamers. I think like Kate and I we

965
00:46:34,040 --> 00:46:36,360
Speaker 1: are very forward looking, and we've talked with some other friends,

966
00:46:36,920 --> 00:46:40,879
Speaker 1: and they kind of absorb information around them in retrospect,

967
00:46:40,920 --> 00:46:42,799
Speaker 1: and so they're able to live in the moment and

968
00:46:42,840 --> 00:46:44,479
Speaker 1: see what they need to do now, or they're able

969
00:46:44,480 --> 00:46:46,760
Speaker 1: to kind of look back on their past, and it's.

970
00:46:46,600 --> 00:46:47,680
Speaker 3: A hard time looking forward.

971
00:46:47,760 --> 00:46:49,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, And so I think it can be difficult

972
00:46:49,560 --> 00:46:52,439
Speaker 1: sometimes to kind of cast that vision, look ahead, ask

973
00:46:52,480 --> 00:46:53,799
Speaker 1: that question, what do you want to do in five

974
00:46:53,880 --> 00:46:54,440
Speaker 1: ten years?

975
00:46:54,680 --> 00:46:55,279
Speaker 3: And so I guess.

976
00:46:55,280 --> 00:46:57,080
Speaker 1: What I want to highlight here is the fact that

977
00:46:57,080 --> 00:46:59,520
Speaker 1: it might take some work to do this dreaming, and

978
00:47:00,080 --> 00:47:01,600
Speaker 1: might be a lot of folks out there who are saying,

979
00:47:01,920 --> 00:47:04,480
Speaker 1: I don't know, what do you talk about? What do

980
00:47:04,520 --> 00:47:06,640
Speaker 1: I want to dream about? And so for those folks

981
00:47:06,680 --> 00:47:09,000
Speaker 1: it might take a little longer than just asking that question,

982
00:47:09,040 --> 00:47:11,239
Speaker 1: but to actually spend some time thinking about what they

983
00:47:11,280 --> 00:47:11,920
Speaker 1: want their life.

984
00:47:11,800 --> 00:47:12,200
Speaker 3: To look like.

985
00:47:12,480 --> 00:47:16,799
Speaker 4: Well, and I think there's fun and experimentation. So it

986
00:47:16,840 --> 00:47:19,600
Speaker 4: may be five years down the line. I'm getting ready

987
00:47:19,600 --> 00:47:22,120
Speaker 4: to be an empty nester in about three months, both

988
00:47:22,120 --> 00:47:24,839
Speaker 4: of my going to be out of the house, and

989
00:47:25,280 --> 00:47:29,879
Speaker 4: my dreaming session is really about who does Erica want

990
00:47:29,920 --> 00:47:33,759
Speaker 4: to be now, and what are the hobbies that will

991
00:47:33,800 --> 00:47:36,719
Speaker 4: be uniquely my own? And what am I going to

992
00:47:36,719 --> 00:47:38,120
Speaker 4: get out of the house to go do since I

993
00:47:38,200 --> 00:47:41,760
Speaker 4: don't have high school events or a kid coming home

994
00:47:41,880 --> 00:47:43,759
Speaker 4: and things like that, and what are me and my

995
00:47:43,800 --> 00:47:47,080
Speaker 4: husband going to do together? So my dreaming really isn't

996
00:47:47,120 --> 00:47:50,520
Speaker 4: about retirement. At this point, we feel pretty confident that

997
00:47:50,560 --> 00:47:53,800
Speaker 4: we're going to be fine, but now like it's about

998
00:47:53,840 --> 00:47:55,719
Speaker 4: how are we going to enjoy one another and how

999
00:47:55,760 --> 00:47:58,080
Speaker 4: are we going to enjoy ourselves? Our life that we

1000
00:47:58,120 --> 00:48:00,000
Speaker 4: get to create now that they're doing their things.

1001
00:48:00,560 --> 00:48:02,399
Speaker 2: I like that you got to kind of reassess those

1002
00:48:02,440 --> 00:48:05,080
Speaker 2: as different life stages take hold and you're entering a

1003
00:48:05,120 --> 00:48:06,200
Speaker 2: completely new one.

1004
00:48:06,360 --> 00:48:07,880
Speaker 4: That's right, Absolutely well.

1005
00:48:07,760 --> 00:48:10,160
Speaker 2: Congratulations to you on that. And since you are last

1006
00:48:10,239 --> 00:48:14,440
Speaker 2: question before you here, Erica, you have successfully raised kids

1007
00:48:14,480 --> 00:48:17,759
Speaker 2: to the point where they can leave and you know,

1008
00:48:17,880 --> 00:48:20,520
Speaker 2: not have to hopefully move back into your basement. I

1009
00:48:20,520 --> 00:48:23,320
Speaker 2: guess I want to know. I want to know how

1010
00:48:23,400 --> 00:48:26,520
Speaker 2: you involve your kids in money conversations throughout the years, Like,

1011
00:48:26,520 --> 00:48:28,440
Speaker 2: how did that work for you? How do you how

1012
00:48:28,440 --> 00:48:31,839
Speaker 2: do you advise other people to include their children when

1013
00:48:31,880 --> 00:48:35,080
Speaker 2: they're talking about money, Because I grew up in a

1014
00:48:35,080 --> 00:48:38,480
Speaker 2: household where I heard money arguments. I heard very little

1015
00:48:38,640 --> 00:48:41,440
Speaker 2: in sort of positive money reinforcement. But then there are

1016
00:48:41,440 --> 00:48:45,040
Speaker 2: some people who are maybe too forthright with their kids

1017
00:48:45,040 --> 00:48:47,160
Speaker 2: about the finances. So yeah, do you have kind of

1018
00:48:47,600 --> 00:48:49,480
Speaker 2: a strategy or a way that you help people think

1019
00:48:49,560 --> 00:48:51,920
Speaker 2: about what it looks like to include their kids and money,

1020
00:48:51,960 --> 00:48:53,160
Speaker 2: money decisions and combos.

1021
00:48:53,360 --> 00:48:56,600
Speaker 4: Yeah, So I think it's really good to make money normal,

1022
00:48:56,800 --> 00:48:59,759
Speaker 4: like normalize the whole conversation all throughout their lives. So

1023
00:49:00,200 --> 00:49:02,600
Speaker 4: age appropriate. Obviously, you don't need to tell your two

1024
00:49:02,680 --> 00:49:05,200
Speaker 4: year old, oh my gosh, we have this much for retirement, right, like,

1025
00:49:05,239 --> 00:49:09,480
Speaker 4: we're not talking that. But make it normal. So for instance,

1026
00:49:09,520 --> 00:49:11,760
Speaker 4: if you're going to get ice cream, it's totally fine

1027
00:49:11,840 --> 00:49:13,960
Speaker 4: to let the two year old hand the five dollar

1028
00:49:14,040 --> 00:49:17,040
Speaker 4: bill over that kind of stuff. It's normal, it's not,

1029
00:49:17,719 --> 00:49:20,160
Speaker 4: and I think it's nowadays we have to be very

1030
00:49:20,200 --> 00:49:23,759
Speaker 4: intentional because we don't use cash all the time, and

1031
00:49:23,800 --> 00:49:26,880
Speaker 4: so sometimes those are the things that are age appropriate.

1032
00:49:27,000 --> 00:49:31,080
Speaker 4: That would be great to be intentional as they get older.

1033
00:49:31,120 --> 00:49:34,880
Speaker 4: Give them more responsibility, you know, work and reward you know, chores,

1034
00:49:34,960 --> 00:49:39,560
Speaker 4: and having them to learn their own how to manage

1035
00:49:39,560 --> 00:49:42,160
Speaker 4: their own money and things like that, and then when

1036
00:49:42,200 --> 00:49:44,319
Speaker 4: they get a job. I think it's super important for

1037
00:49:44,360 --> 00:49:48,200
Speaker 4: teenagers to get a job. I think that balancing act

1038
00:49:48,320 --> 00:49:51,200
Speaker 4: in high school is very valuable. And my husband and

1039
00:49:51,280 --> 00:49:55,120
Speaker 4: I we basically said we'll pay half on your car,

1040
00:49:55,239 --> 00:49:57,360
Speaker 4: you pay the other half. You earn the money to

1041
00:49:57,440 --> 00:50:00,839
Speaker 4: pay the other half. And they both did it, and

1042
00:50:00,880 --> 00:50:03,360
Speaker 4: they both have vehicles that they you know, my oldest

1043
00:50:03,440 --> 00:50:06,680
Speaker 4: she kept her vehicle for four years through or six

1044
00:50:06,719 --> 00:50:09,239
Speaker 4: years actually, the rest of high school and college and

1045
00:50:09,280 --> 00:50:12,719
Speaker 4: my youngest is doing the same right now. And so,

1046
00:50:13,520 --> 00:50:16,319
Speaker 4: but the biggest conversation that I think parents need to

1047
00:50:16,320 --> 00:50:20,239
Speaker 4: have if you have made money a normal thing to

1048
00:50:20,400 --> 00:50:24,960
Speaker 4: discuss along the way, is when they are a sophomore

1049
00:50:25,160 --> 00:50:26,960
Speaker 4: or a junior in high school and you began to

1050
00:50:26,960 --> 00:50:30,479
Speaker 4: talk about what's next, if college is next, you really

1051
00:50:30,520 --> 00:50:33,120
Speaker 4: need to let them know what you are willing to do,

1052
00:50:33,320 --> 00:50:36,120
Speaker 4: what you are capable of doing in terms of helping them,

1053
00:50:36,600 --> 00:50:38,719
Speaker 4: or what it is and or I should say, what

1054
00:50:38,760 --> 00:50:40,680
Speaker 4: it is they need to do in order to make

1055
00:50:40,880 --> 00:50:45,280
Speaker 4: their college you know, goal or reality. It's really hard

1056
00:50:45,760 --> 00:50:49,000
Speaker 4: to have a conversation about hundreds of thousands of dollars

1057
00:50:49,480 --> 00:50:52,760
Speaker 4: if you haven't laid that foundation early and then also

1058
00:50:53,600 --> 00:50:57,640
Speaker 4: set the expectation of we will spend this much on it,

1059
00:50:58,080 --> 00:51:00,520
Speaker 4: or we can't help at all, or whatever it is,

1060
00:51:00,920 --> 00:51:04,640
Speaker 4: be honest, because I think that is the biggest impact

1061
00:51:04,760 --> 00:51:06,960
Speaker 4: for the rest of their lives, whether or not they're

1062
00:51:06,960 --> 00:51:09,799
Speaker 4: going to have student loan debt or not, or what

1063
00:51:09,840 --> 00:51:11,880
Speaker 4: it is that they need to do in order for

1064
00:51:12,000 --> 00:51:13,480
Speaker 4: them to be able to go to school for free

1065
00:51:13,640 --> 00:51:16,200
Speaker 4: or do something different. And so I think that's the

1066
00:51:16,239 --> 00:51:20,040
Speaker 4: biggest financial impact. But again, if you've made that foundation

1067
00:51:20,400 --> 00:51:25,120
Speaker 4: along the way. Talking about money isn't scary. Tell them

1068
00:51:25,160 --> 00:51:27,080
Speaker 4: about my kids knew we were getting out of debt.

1069
00:51:27,239 --> 00:51:29,920
Speaker 4: They knew when they were young, they knew what the

1070
00:51:29,960 --> 00:51:34,840
Speaker 4: difference between debt and debit was. And so those kinds

1071
00:51:34,840 --> 00:51:38,320
Speaker 4: of things are very helpful and build that foundation for

1072
00:51:38,920 --> 00:51:41,719
Speaker 4: I want to get out of college without debt because

1073
00:51:42,239 --> 00:51:46,680
Speaker 4: my parents didn't do it, and my oldest is graduating

1074
00:51:46,719 --> 00:51:49,640
Speaker 4: on Saturday, and she's got no debt to speak of,

1075
00:51:49,840 --> 00:51:54,120
Speaker 4: and so I think it's really important that we build

1076
00:51:54,200 --> 00:51:58,680
Speaker 4: that foundation so that you know, their biggest opportunity to

1077
00:51:58,680 --> 00:52:01,600
Speaker 4: make a difference in their future does not come with

1078
00:52:01,760 --> 00:52:02,520
Speaker 4: strings attached.

1079
00:52:03,000 --> 00:52:03,479
Speaker 3: That's right.

1080
00:52:03,560 --> 00:52:06,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, it is hard to have those those big ticket

1081
00:52:06,440 --> 00:52:07,880
Speaker 1: items when you haven't even talked.

1082
00:52:07,680 --> 00:52:08,719
Speaker 3: About the day to day. Huh.

1083
00:52:08,880 --> 00:52:12,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that. That's so good. How those conversations

1084
00:52:12,520 --> 00:52:15,239
Speaker 1: make money. Conversations normal, make money normal. That's what you're

1085
00:52:15,280 --> 00:52:17,080
Speaker 1: trying to do here, Erica. That's what we're doing here

1086
00:52:17,120 --> 00:52:20,000
Speaker 1: with how to Money. We really appreciate you coming on

1087
00:52:20,000 --> 00:52:23,120
Speaker 1: the show and sharing all these nuggets of wisdom and

1088
00:52:23,239 --> 00:52:26,400
Speaker 1: just your experience with our listeners. If folks wanted to

1089
00:52:26,480 --> 00:52:29,160
Speaker 1: learn more about you, what you're up to your coaching

1090
00:52:29,200 --> 00:52:30,799
Speaker 1: business as well. Where should they head?

1091
00:52:31,120 --> 00:52:33,759
Speaker 4: Yeah, So tailormaybudgets dot com is the place to find me.

1092
00:52:33,880 --> 00:52:36,200
Speaker 4: I'm on Instagram as well on Tailor Made Budgets, and

1093
00:52:36,239 --> 00:52:39,640
Speaker 4: I love to interact with people individually on LinkedIn as well.

1094
00:52:39,680 --> 00:52:41,080
Speaker 4: You can find me there at Erica Yung.

1095
00:52:41,760 --> 00:52:43,719
Speaker 2: Erica, You're the best. Thank you so much for joining us.

1096
00:52:43,760 --> 00:52:44,759
Speaker 2: We really appreciate it.

1097
00:52:44,840 --> 00:52:46,800
Speaker 4: Thank you for having me all right, Matt.

1098
00:52:46,680 --> 00:52:49,759
Speaker 2: That was a phenomenal conversation with Eric Young. So much

1099
00:52:49,840 --> 00:52:53,560
Speaker 2: good information, so much wisdom, and we covered just some

1100
00:52:53,719 --> 00:52:55,840
Speaker 2: range of topics. We have really talked about money coaching

1101
00:52:55,840 --> 00:52:57,880
Speaker 2: to that extent before, we haven't, but she made a

1102
00:52:57,960 --> 00:53:02,000
Speaker 2: compelling case for hiring someone who is in your corner,

1103
00:53:02,080 --> 00:53:04,080
Speaker 2: who isn't your best friend. So I don't know, I'm

1104
00:53:04,080 --> 00:53:05,760
Speaker 2: curious to hear from you. What was your big takeaway

1105
00:53:05,760 --> 00:53:06,280
Speaker 2: from this combo?

1106
00:53:06,520 --> 00:53:08,399
Speaker 1: It was related to that so around land is when

1107
00:53:08,400 --> 00:53:11,439
Speaker 1: she was talking about like like we were asking her

1108
00:53:11,480 --> 00:53:13,279
Speaker 1: about the trade offs that we make in life and

1109
00:53:13,320 --> 00:53:16,400
Speaker 1: how does she walk someone through the different expenses that

1110
00:53:16,440 --> 00:53:19,240
Speaker 1: they're facing in life. And basically what she was saying

1111
00:53:19,280 --> 00:53:22,440
Speaker 1: and what she said she does is that she questions

1112
00:53:22,600 --> 00:53:25,360
Speaker 1: everything right, and so it's like okay, And specifically the

1113
00:53:25,440 --> 00:53:27,799
Speaker 1: question she she brought up is what value is this

1114
00:53:27,800 --> 00:53:28,640
Speaker 1: bringing to your life?

1115
00:53:28,719 --> 00:53:30,440
Speaker 3: I think she said, how is this serving you? Oh?

1116
00:53:30,520 --> 00:53:34,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, that is what she said. Yeah. But by questioning

1117
00:53:34,840 --> 00:53:37,120
Speaker 1: everything like that, I think it puts everything on the table,

1118
00:53:37,200 --> 00:53:40,239
Speaker 1: like everything has the potential to be asked. And I

1119
00:53:40,280 --> 00:53:43,839
Speaker 1: think oftentimes whether we are trying to diy our own

1120
00:53:43,840 --> 00:53:46,560
Speaker 1: budget or maybe if we're working with a partner, but

1121
00:53:46,719 --> 00:53:49,000
Speaker 1: sometimes there are certain things that we're not willing to

1122
00:53:49,040 --> 00:53:51,840
Speaker 1: even address. But when she steps into the equation, she

1123
00:53:52,040 --> 00:53:54,960
Speaker 1: is asking everything, Like you said, how is this serving you?

1124
00:53:55,080 --> 00:53:57,520
Speaker 1: And if you don't have a good answer, then it

1125
00:53:57,600 --> 00:54:00,000
Speaker 1: is worth considering removing that from your life.

1126
00:54:00,200 --> 00:54:01,000
Speaker 3: To cut your expenses.

1127
00:54:01,040 --> 00:54:03,279
Speaker 1: If you're looking to climb out of debt, that is

1128
00:54:03,360 --> 00:54:05,440
Speaker 1: the fastest way to do that. You don't have to

1129
00:54:05,440 --> 00:54:07,879
Speaker 1: dedicate more time to earning more money to pay off

1130
00:54:07,920 --> 00:54:10,600
Speaker 1: that debt. Let's just start slashing some of these expenses.

1131
00:54:10,800 --> 00:54:13,640
Speaker 1: The reason why we always lead lead into our interviews

1132
00:54:13,719 --> 00:54:16,600
Speaker 1: by asking what is your craft beer equivalent? Because there

1133
00:54:16,600 --> 00:54:18,680
Speaker 1: are things that we spend money on, but there should

1134
00:54:18,680 --> 00:54:21,000
Speaker 1: always be a good reason why it is that we

1135
00:54:21,040 --> 00:54:23,480
Speaker 1: spend money on those things. And so I love that

1136
00:54:23,480 --> 00:54:25,560
Speaker 1: that's something that she asks, Yeah, how about you, man, what.

1137
00:54:25,560 --> 00:54:26,200
Speaker 3: Was your big takeaway?

1138
00:54:26,200 --> 00:54:27,920
Speaker 2: Okay, So I love when she said that you need

1139
00:54:27,960 --> 00:54:31,719
Speaker 2: to face where you are and there's the reality check.

1140
00:54:31,760 --> 00:54:31,960
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1141
00:54:31,960 --> 00:54:33,120
Speaker 2: And so instead of being like, I need to lose

1142
00:54:33,160 --> 00:54:35,759
Speaker 2: twenty pounds because I think I'm twenty pounds overweight, if

1143
00:54:35,800 --> 00:54:37,919
Speaker 2: you're really fifty pounds overweight, like you need to face

1144
00:54:37,960 --> 00:54:39,600
Speaker 2: the actual fact. You need to face the number on

1145
00:54:39,640 --> 00:54:42,919
Speaker 2: the scale so that you can then make a decent

1146
00:54:42,960 --> 00:54:45,200
Speaker 2: decision about where you need to go move from here.

1147
00:54:45,520 --> 00:54:47,080
Speaker 1: How are you supposed to lose ten pounds if you

1148
00:54:47,080 --> 00:54:49,520
Speaker 1: don't even have a scale or if you refuse to get.

1149
00:54:49,400 --> 00:54:50,120
Speaker 3: On it exactly?

1150
00:54:50,400 --> 00:54:52,080
Speaker 2: And so you know, one of the things that she

1151
00:54:52,160 --> 00:54:54,120
Speaker 2: said is signs that you might need a financial coach

1152
00:54:54,640 --> 00:54:56,920
Speaker 2: is if your debt level hasn't moved, if you're not

1153
00:54:56,920 --> 00:55:00,160
Speaker 2: making any progress, or if you're following victim to wishful thinking.

1154
00:55:00,320 --> 00:55:02,480
Speaker 2: And I thought those were all really good things to

1155
00:55:02,840 --> 00:55:05,319
Speaker 2: help people know when they need outside help. It's like

1156
00:55:05,840 --> 00:55:09,720
Speaker 2: a right, are you just like believing overly optimistically? Maybe

1157
00:55:09,760 --> 00:55:13,240
Speaker 2: like I do sometimes on things not necessarily money related.

1158
00:55:13,480 --> 00:55:16,839
Speaker 2: I can be overly optimistic about my future. And I

1159
00:55:16,920 --> 00:55:18,839
Speaker 2: love the fact that I'm an optimist, but there are

1160
00:55:18,840 --> 00:55:20,279
Speaker 2: times when I do need to live in reality a

1161
00:55:20,320 --> 00:55:23,440
Speaker 2: little bit more. And so maybe if you're falling victim

1162
00:55:23,480 --> 00:55:25,440
Speaker 2: to that, if you constantly think, well, I'm going to

1163
00:55:25,440 --> 00:55:27,040
Speaker 2: do this, this is going to happen. I'm getting there,

1164
00:55:27,160 --> 00:55:29,520
Speaker 2: but you're not actually getting anywhere. The numbers don't indicate

1165
00:55:29,560 --> 00:55:32,520
Speaker 2: that you're making any progress. That might be that might

1166
00:55:32,560 --> 00:55:35,839
Speaker 2: indicate that you need some sort of financial coach in

1167
00:55:35,840 --> 00:55:38,920
Speaker 2: your life in order to help you make some progress

1168
00:55:38,960 --> 00:55:40,839
Speaker 2: and point out maybe some of those flaws in your

1169
00:55:40,840 --> 00:55:43,520
Speaker 2: thinking or in some of your behavior. So I don't know,

1170
00:55:43,560 --> 00:55:44,839
Speaker 2: I think that's a good call, and I do think

1171
00:55:44,840 --> 00:55:48,480
Speaker 2: a financial coach. Sometimes people think I need a financial planner. Well,

1172
00:55:48,480 --> 00:55:51,560
Speaker 2: a financial coach is actually completely different, and probably for

1173
00:55:51,680 --> 00:55:54,279
Speaker 2: most folks what they need is a financial coach, not

1174
00:55:54,360 --> 00:55:57,040
Speaker 2: a financial planner. It's not about growing your investments to

1175
00:55:57,080 --> 00:56:00,000
Speaker 2: the sky. It's literally about changing some of those habits

1176
00:55:59,760 --> 00:56:02,120
Speaker 2: and behaviors and kind of focusing on some of those

1177
00:56:02,200 --> 00:56:05,279
Speaker 2: everyday things. And guess what, financial coaches are typically quite

1178
00:56:05,280 --> 00:56:08,360
Speaker 2: a bit less expensive too, So I do think financial

1179
00:56:08,400 --> 00:56:11,960
Speaker 2: coaches are one of those things that are underrepresented, and

1180
00:56:11,960 --> 00:56:14,359
Speaker 2: it probably could help a whole lot more folks. So yeah, first,

1181
00:56:14,400 --> 00:56:16,120
Speaker 2: for folks who find themselves, I think in a position

1182
00:56:16,880 --> 00:56:20,360
Speaker 2: like this, I think a financial coach is probably a

1183
00:56:20,400 --> 00:56:21,279
Speaker 2: really good place to turn.

1184
00:56:21,360 --> 00:56:21,640
Speaker 3: Totally.

1185
00:56:21,719 --> 00:56:23,799
Speaker 1: Yeah, a financial coach can help you to get where

1186
00:56:23,800 --> 00:56:26,040
Speaker 1: I want to be. And I swear we never do this.

1187
00:56:26,680 --> 00:56:29,440
Speaker 1: We don't often try to coordinate our beers with the

1188
00:56:29,480 --> 00:56:31,760
Speaker 1: topic of the show. We just think about the style

1189
00:56:31,800 --> 00:56:34,160
Speaker 1: of beer we want to enjoy. But literally, the name

1190
00:56:34,200 --> 00:56:36,000
Speaker 1: of the beer we're drinking today is where I want

1191
00:56:36,040 --> 00:56:39,600
Speaker 1: to be. This is by Deciduous Brewing Company. This is

1192
00:56:39,600 --> 00:56:42,319
Speaker 1: a hazy New England style ipagel.

1193
00:56:42,480 --> 00:56:45,960
Speaker 2: Your thoughts, man, robust, hop goodness are the words I

1194
00:56:46,000 --> 00:56:48,960
Speaker 2: wrote down. It was a great middle of the road,

1195
00:56:48,960 --> 00:56:52,560
Speaker 2: hazy IPA. Nothing over the top, but nothing underwhelming. It

1196
00:56:52,600 --> 00:56:55,560
Speaker 2: left me just feeling, you know, just happy, like Goldilock style,

1197
00:56:55,960 --> 00:56:57,759
Speaker 2: the perfect tempt, the perfect beer right here.

1198
00:56:57,840 --> 00:56:58,400
Speaker 3: I loved it.

1199
00:56:58,560 --> 00:57:00,840
Speaker 1: That's right, man. It was just right, too hazy, but

1200
00:57:01,040 --> 00:57:03,800
Speaker 1: not too perfectly clear, like a West Coast style IPA,

1201
00:57:04,480 --> 00:57:07,000
Speaker 1: nice and sweet with some of that hop sharpness going on.

1202
00:57:07,320 --> 00:57:10,560
Speaker 1: A fantastic brew that we've never heard of before deciduous.

1203
00:57:10,719 --> 00:57:13,040
Speaker 1: We'll be sure to check out more beers from them.

1204
00:57:13,120 --> 00:57:15,200
Speaker 1: If you've had some other beers, maybe reach out to

1205
00:57:15,320 --> 00:57:16,960
Speaker 1: us let us know what other beers we should be

1206
00:57:17,040 --> 00:57:17,480
Speaker 1: checking out.

1207
00:57:18,400 --> 00:57:20,280
Speaker 2: We just started getting their stuff here in Atlanta. So

1208
00:57:20,320 --> 00:57:21,560
Speaker 2: I saw him on the shelf. I was like, okay,

1209
00:57:21,600 --> 00:57:23,360
Speaker 2: all right, we'reth the try for sure, and this one

1210
00:57:23,360 --> 00:57:24,360
Speaker 2: at least didn't disappoint.

1211
00:57:24,440 --> 00:57:24,840
Speaker 3: That's right.

1212
00:57:24,920 --> 00:57:26,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, So you can find show notes up on the

1213
00:57:26,800 --> 00:57:29,439
Speaker 1: website at howdomoney dot com, along with a picture of

1214
00:57:29,480 --> 00:57:31,480
Speaker 1: this beer. And we'll also make sure to link to

1215
00:57:31,560 --> 00:57:33,720
Speaker 1: Eric's book that we mentioned during this episode as well

1216
00:57:33,760 --> 00:57:35,920
Speaker 1: as her sites. You can find all of that at

1217
00:57:35,920 --> 00:57:38,760
Speaker 1: how tomoney dot com. Joel, that's gonna be it for today, buddy.

1218
00:57:38,840 --> 00:57:41,959
Speaker 2: Until next time, Best Friends Out, Best Friends Out.