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Speaker 1: This is the EDS with Eddie Judge and Edwin Ado Yave.

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Speaker 1: Welcome back to the EDS podcast. My name is Eddie

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Speaker 1: and we have our co hosts, dear friend Edwin back

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Speaker 1: on the mic.

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Speaker 2: Hey, Eddie, it's good to be back.

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Speaker 1: I missed it too. It was it was. I gotta say,

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Speaker 1: it was a fun podcast that I did without you,

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Speaker 1: but it wasn't the same, you know. It's it's always

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Speaker 1: so much fun having you on here and just getting

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Speaker 1: your perspective and talking and you know, today I am

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Speaker 1: really just want to get an update on what's going

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Speaker 1: on with you there. I can't imagine how much you

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Speaker 1: know is going on with you, between your companies and

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Speaker 1: your family, your health, I can't even imagine. So today's

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Speaker 1: podcast is going to be about Edwin coming back and

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Speaker 1: you know, just sharing his challenges with what's going on.

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Speaker 1: If you don't know what's going on, you're gonna find out.

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Speaker 2: So there we go.

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Speaker 1: All right, awesome, Well a lot has changed since we

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Speaker 1: last talked. And first off, how are you?

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Speaker 2: How are you doing? I'm doing all right considering right,

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Speaker 2: it's been quite the six months. I was just thinking

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Speaker 2: about it. It's been yeah, six months now of a

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Speaker 2: little bit of a dark value that I'm going through.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, yeah, it's just it's funny because it's it's

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Speaker 2: not just in in my personal life. It's been with

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Speaker 2: you know, with my business and you know, just when

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Speaker 2: it rains, it pours. But again, you just kind of

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Speaker 2: you've got to continue to just push forward.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, Well, let's let's go back a little bit.

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Speaker 1: I mean, I I know a little bit about what's

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Speaker 1: going on, but I don't know, you know, what you

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Speaker 1: can and cannot share. So let's let's let's start where

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Speaker 1: you know, you found out that Teddy has tumors in

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Speaker 1: her head. And gosh, it feels like it was years

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Speaker 1: ago because it's just happening so fast and I know

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Speaker 1: that she's still struggling with it. But yeah, tell me

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Speaker 1: take us back to when it all happened and you've

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Speaker 1: got the news, you know that she had tumors in

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Speaker 1: her head.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it was interesting because I had just it was

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Speaker 2: two days after the super Bowl and I just had

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Speaker 2: this like epic super Bowl party and I was thinking

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Speaker 2: to myself, like I forgot how much I used to

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Speaker 2: love to entertain and I just had a super Bowl party.

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Speaker 2: Then two weeks after before that, I had like an

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Speaker 2: NFC championship party. You know, I'm a big football fan. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: and I'm sort of getting used to this lifestyle that

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Speaker 2: I'm now living, right, And then two days later I

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Speaker 2: get a call. So two days after Super Bowl, I

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Speaker 2: get a call from Teddy basically saying that she couldn't

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Speaker 2: see wow. And I immediately got frightened because she had

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Speaker 2: been complaining about having headaches for the last two weeks

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Speaker 2: and I kept telling her, you should get this thing

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Speaker 2: checked out. And the reason I was concerned was a

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Speaker 2: good friend of mine had a brain aneurism and he

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Speaker 2: had the same symptoms where just a bad headache, migraines.

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Speaker 2: He never had migraines and same altenies. She never had,

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Speaker 2: like a migraine headache. And then all of a sudden

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Speaker 2: her she's got these migraines that she's had for a

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Speaker 2: while now. And then I didn't tell her this, but

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Speaker 2: in the back of my mind was, well, what if

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Speaker 2: that things are tumor and that's why she's got like

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Speaker 2: these big headaches. But of course I didn't say that,

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Speaker 2: and I just said, hey, you should go get checked.

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Speaker 2: You should go get checked. So when she called and said,

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Speaker 2: I couldn't see. Now. The first thing I'm thinking is, Okay,

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Speaker 2: it's either a tumor or it's a maybe it's this

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Speaker 2: brain aneurysm. So I just finished. I was on a

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Speaker 2: sales call. We do a national sales call for the company,

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Speaker 2: for my company. I just literally hung up to fall

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Speaker 2: the zoom call and I get a call from her.

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Speaker 2: And I was staying at at a place in Beverly

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Speaker 2: Hills that I stay at at my friend's house, and

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Speaker 2: I immediately just hopped on the car and came to

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Speaker 2: and see, you know, picked her up. Well. I was

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Speaker 2: talking to her at the time, and I was trying

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Speaker 2: to get info to find out kind of exactly what

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Speaker 2: was going on, And luckily a friend of mine who's

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Speaker 2: a doctor, sort of guided Teddy and I and she

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Speaker 2: told us what to do, which was to get her

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Speaker 2: to an emergency place that actually had a CT scan.

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Speaker 2: It's an emergency hospital where they could immediately do a

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Speaker 2: CT scan and see what was going on with the brain.

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Speaker 2: Because normally, when you can't see like that and there's

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Speaker 2: that much pain, there's got to be something there, and

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Speaker 2: we want we wanted to make sure that that there

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Speaker 2: wasn't a brain aneurysm. But and then what we ended

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Speaker 2: up finding once we did the CT scan was obviously

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Speaker 2: she had these tumors in her head. And then like buzzwords,

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Speaker 2: you got to say, because most of the time they

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Speaker 2: don't want to give you a CT scan just like that.

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Speaker 2: But yeah, she couldn't see it. She was in a

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Speaker 2: lot of pain. And then when I found her, she

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Speaker 2: was actually in the in her sofa laying down because

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Speaker 2: she couldn't walk. Wow, and uh yeah at that point,

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Speaker 2: just took her straight to the hospital and trying to

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Speaker 2: remain calm. You know, you can't.

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Speaker 1: Did the kids see that?

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Speaker 2: They did it? So look good? Did it? And you know, Teddy,

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Speaker 2: she can take a lot of pain. She's she definitely

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Speaker 2: has a tolerance for pain. And you know with with

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Speaker 2: her horseback riding backgrounding and there's time she's falling and

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Speaker 2: she just she just if she says she's hurt, because

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Speaker 2: she must be in a lot of pain. So the

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Speaker 2: fact that she couldn't take the pain anymore was concerning

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Speaker 2: because again I know that she just wouldn't. She's not

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Speaker 2: one to just say she's hurt if she's not.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, I could sense that and I do believe

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Speaker 1: my her and my wife have that in common. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: they have a very high pain tolerance. Although I think

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Speaker 1: my wife has gotten to the point in her in

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Speaker 1: her life that she goes to the hospital or urging care,

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Speaker 1: you know, for almost anything that that is really out

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Speaker 1: of the ordinary for her, like out of the pain threshold.

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Speaker 1: And even though I had an issue with my heart,

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Speaker 1: you know, I've always been one that unless my arm

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Speaker 1: has fallen off, I'm not going to the hospital if

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Speaker 1: it's just a bruise, cut or or even a headache.

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Speaker 1: But a headache that last two weeks is very concerning. Yes,

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Speaker 1: she's never had one, right, Yeah, if you're healthy and

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Speaker 1: you get these, Now, I have experienced something like that.

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Speaker 1: I've never had headaches ever in my life. And I

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Speaker 1: when we got the house in Big Bear, I got twice.

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Speaker 1: I got these massive headaches which I can only imagine

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Speaker 1: were like like I don't know what they were, but

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Speaker 1: they were so painful. I had to get out of

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Speaker 1: bed and walk around, and you know, think, what the

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Speaker 1: hell am I going to do? Am I gotta go

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Speaker 1: to the hospital for a headache? And I considered the elevation.

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Speaker 1: I considered I didn't hydrate enough, and sure enough, you know,

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Speaker 1: I got through it. I didn't take anything, and the

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Speaker 1: very next day I was fine. But it was scary.

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Speaker 1: It was scary to feel that level of pain and

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Speaker 1: a headache that you know, if you've never experienced headaches,

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Speaker 1: it's a big red flag.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and especially when when it's so bad that you

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Speaker 2: can't even see anymore.

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Speaker 1: So, oh, I can't even imagine. So it's my understanding

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Speaker 1: that they have they found four tumors, right or yeah.

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Speaker 2: Well, so when we when she had the surgery done

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Speaker 2: at the emergency clinic or not clinic but hospital that

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Speaker 2: we were at, Yeah, we they basically came down. The

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Speaker 2: doctor came down and was like, this isn't good. And

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Speaker 2: then right when he said this isn't good, I'm like, shit,

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Speaker 2: they're too much. And sure enough, we didn't know how

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Speaker 2: many tumors at the time, but they just said we

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Speaker 2: had to go to Cedars and go for an emergency

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Speaker 2: more get more scans, I guess. And then I think

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Speaker 2: the next day was when she had to have emergency.

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Speaker 2: That's when she had her surgery right away. Yeah, they

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Speaker 2: had to be right away. Yeah, wow, that was Tuesday.

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Speaker 2: So next day I want to say at three pm

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Speaker 2: the next day she went in for surgery. No, that's

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Speaker 2: that's when we found out the tumors. It was I

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Speaker 2: think it was four. I mean, I can't even remember now,

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Speaker 2: but I think it was four that they surgically removed,

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Speaker 2: and then there was four that we're gonna remain there

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Speaker 2: that they were just going to treat with radiation. But

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Speaker 2: before were the size of a plumb.

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Speaker 1: Wow. Yeah, gosh, I can't even imagine that.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, no, it was it was, uh, well, went through.

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Speaker 1: Your head when you found out that she had tumors

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Speaker 1: of size plumbs in her head? And what were your

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Speaker 1: first thoughts?

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Speaker 2: You know, I think, you know, it's interesting you I

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Speaker 2: think I went on like fight or flight mode. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: flight or fight mode or whatever that's called it where

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Speaker 2: it just I just think I think the emotion, you know,

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Speaker 2: when I always like, I've always been good at handling pressure,

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Speaker 2: handling bad news. I don't know if that stemmed from

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Speaker 2: you know, being a kid and stuff, because you know,

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Speaker 2: when when our home would get raided by law enforcement,

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Speaker 2: I remember that. You know, usually when that happens, they

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Speaker 2: you know, they flip your house upside down. They know

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Speaker 2: everybody's on the floor, they're handcuffing people, and I remember, uh,

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Speaker 2: my mom would always say, are you okay? And she'd

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Speaker 2: always came out and you know, when you're a kid,

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Speaker 2: they can't handcuff you. So we're just kind of sitting

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Speaker 2: and they're watching, and I remember just having to be

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Speaker 2: so calm for my mom because I didn't want her

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Speaker 2: to feel like I was in any kind of pain

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Speaker 2: where I was worried. And I don't know if it

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Speaker 2: was that, because I've tried to kind of think back

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Speaker 2: and reflect, like how come I when the pressure is on,

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Speaker 2: I just have this calmness about me that just kind

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Speaker 2: of where like the emotion kind of goes away and

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Speaker 2: I just focus on like, Okay, we just need to

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Speaker 2: get things done, we need to get complete stuff. And

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Speaker 2: that's always been how I've dealt with it, you know,

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Speaker 2: the way I've always cured sort of anxiety, worry, frustration

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Speaker 2: is really by just going to work on getting things done,

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Speaker 2: like things that I need to do, like complete task.

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Speaker 2: And it's kind of the way I look at it.

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Speaker 2: So the first thing that came to me was, all right,

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Speaker 2: I gotta I gotta make sure the family is taken

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Speaker 2: care of. I got to make sure that I transfer

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Speaker 2: certainty to the kids, certain confidence to the kids, and

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Speaker 2: I just started getting done, getting things done that I

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Speaker 2: know I needed to do, with work, with the family,

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Speaker 2: with work, and just things like that. So that I've

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Speaker 2: noticed has always helped me with that anxiety part. I think,

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Speaker 2: at least for me, when I just sit back and

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Speaker 2: think and not get things, when I don't do the

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Speaker 2: things that I'm supposed to get done, then that's when

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Speaker 2: the mind sort of takes over and you get a

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Speaker 2: lot of thoughts in your head. Yeah, crazy, crazy thoughts, right. So,

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Speaker 2: so I've always loved taking action towards whatever that worry is,

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Speaker 2: whatever that frustration is. That what I've noticed is always

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Speaker 2: when you take action towards it, it's always been the

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Speaker 2: cure for me. Versus the opposite of that is you

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Speaker 2: let that fear paralyze you. That fear then becomes procrastination,

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Speaker 2: and then it becomes paranoia where because you're not doing anything,

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Speaker 2: you're just in your head and you're never gonna overthink

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Speaker 2: good thoughts, but you will always overthink bad thoughts.

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Speaker 1: And you might even act on them, and you might

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Speaker 1: even act on those bad dots.

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Speaker 2: So you know, I think for me again, I think

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Speaker 2: it was just at that moment, it was kind of

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Speaker 2: fight or flight mode, and the I don't think I

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Speaker 2: processed it. It was just Okay, what do we do?

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Speaker 2: What do we need to do next? How can we

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Speaker 2: get Teddy feeling confident? How can we get her feeling

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Speaker 2: you know, like everything's going to be all right? That

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Speaker 2: was sort of my first thought, is getting her in

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Speaker 2: a good place and then and then getting the kids

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Speaker 2: in a good place.

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Speaker 1: Well, I'm sure the listeners would appreciate hearing about this,

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Speaker 1: pardon and I know I witnessed it. But the fact

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Speaker 1: that you guys were going through some real turmoil in

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Speaker 1: your relationships and you just swept out of aside and

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Speaker 1: stepped up and took care of her and and and

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Speaker 1: you know, got her to the right people and you're

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Speaker 1: just you're there for her. That says a lot about you, bro.

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Speaker 1: I mean, that's that's a big step up and a

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Speaker 1: big ass But yeah, I know, deep down inside it's

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Speaker 1: it's because this is the woman that you love and

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Speaker 1: and it's the mother of your children. But how did

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Speaker 1: you process that?

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Speaker 2: You know, people think that's hard, but for me, that

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Speaker 2: was just that's just what I do, like it's it's

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Speaker 2: no matter what, I will always loved Teddy and she's Yeah,

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Speaker 2: she's been a big part of my life. And I

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Speaker 2: just I like taking care of people, like I like,

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Speaker 2: it's just what I what I do. So it wasn't

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Speaker 2: it wasn't even like a question a question it was

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Speaker 2: it was it was reflexive. Yeah. And the thing is, again,

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Speaker 2: was getting her to a point where she felt confident,

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Speaker 2: she felt like she wasn't alone, she felt like she mattered. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: And that was my thing is I wanted to because

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Speaker 2: you know, I think a big part of dealing with

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Speaker 2: this situation is feeling confident, feeling like you're not alone.

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Speaker 2: And I think her her friends all stepped up, her

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Speaker 2: family all stepped up, and it helped me a lot.

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Speaker 2: You know, I wouldn't have been able to do what

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Speaker 2: I did if it wasn't for her friends and her family.

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Speaker 2: I think one of the things that messes you with

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Speaker 2: that that just messes with you quite a bit. As

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Speaker 2: far as not being able to function a sleep, Yeah,

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Speaker 2: and her friends stepped up and they they would spend

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Speaker 2: the night with her. So I think I did that

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Speaker 2: the first two nights, which that was rough. Because then

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Speaker 2: you can't really at least for me, I can't function

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Speaker 2: without sleep, right, And her her friends all took turns

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Speaker 2: because she was I want to say, it was a

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Speaker 2: good ten fourteen days. Yeah, that she was. She was

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Speaker 2: ten days in the ICU for sure. So I was always.

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Speaker 1: Talking about the hospital, like staying at the hospital.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, staying at the hospital. So every night there, her

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Speaker 2: friends would step up and they would take turns on

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Speaker 2: who would spend the night there.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, which again that was huge.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And you know, at the end of the day,

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Speaker 2: I think when when stuff like that happens, you don't

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Speaker 2: want to feel alone, and you want to feel like

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Speaker 2: you matter and you want to feel like there's people

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Speaker 2: rooting for you. And Teddy's friends and family did that.

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Speaker 2: So I'm so grateful to all of you guys. I know,

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Speaker 2: you guys went a couple of times, and you know

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Speaker 2: that meant everything for her. Yeah. Yeah, her friends and

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Speaker 2: her and her dad, her whole family came down. So

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Speaker 2: again it was it was good to see that kind

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Speaker 2: of support. And yeah, that allowed me also to take

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Speaker 2: care of the kids, right, because the kids were back

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Speaker 2: at home and.

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Speaker 1: Stuff, so there's just one of you.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, So when that happened, I would stay home with

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Speaker 2: the kids and make sure they were confident and again

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Speaker 2: make sure that they knew that and I was upfront

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Speaker 2: with them, what's what was going on?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, Okay, how did they take it?

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Speaker 2: They got scared, obviously, they were concerned, But I tried

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Speaker 2: my best to again not sugarcoat it too much, let

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Speaker 2: them know, Hey, there are some risks that come with us.

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Speaker 2: You know, I called it the way it was. It's like, hey,

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Speaker 2: there's some tumors that your mom has in her brain. Wow,

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Speaker 2: And I said, it sounds worse than what it is.

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Speaker 2: But this is what I think is, this is what

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Speaker 2: we think is going to happen. This is sort of

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Speaker 2: how we're going to deal with it, and this is

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Speaker 2: why I'm confident that she's going to make it through. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: And we did it that way just because we knew

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Speaker 2: that it's better to be direct with them that they

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Speaker 2: than them find out online or on the internet or somewhere.

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Speaker 1: So.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but they've been they've been strong. You know, kids

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Speaker 2: are resilient. They are, and I've been very impressed with them.

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Speaker 2: They you know, they've still been doing great in school.

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Speaker 2: They've been doing great in the sports. I've tried to

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Speaker 2: just keep it consistent with them, so keeping a normal life, yeah,

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Speaker 2: have them continue to do what they've always done. Yeah, So,

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Speaker 2: and that's what we've been doing.

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Speaker 1: So I want to say that dust has settled since

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Speaker 1: the surgery, but I do understand that there's more going on.

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Speaker 1: So asking you, like, where are you at now, I mean,

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Speaker 1: are you still in fight or flight or has it

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Speaker 1: dust settled? Or are we back in crisis mode? How

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Speaker 1: she doing?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, she's doing great. I mean she's progressing. So that's

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Speaker 2: that's what we try to focus on, is just the

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Speaker 2: progress and not so much the perfection of it. We

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Speaker 2: know there's going to be setbacks, you know. The first

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Speaker 2: two weeks were the first three weeks were all about

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Speaker 2: post surgery because that surgery was basically two surgeries in

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Speaker 2: one and the recovery on time. The recovery for that

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Speaker 2: was a tough one. So that was sort of the

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Speaker 2: first barrier challenge that we had to get through, and

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Speaker 2: then that took about three weeks. And then the second

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Speaker 2: challenge now is the treatment because then she starts treatment

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Speaker 2: and then we got to make sure to see that

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Speaker 2: treatment works. But then there's also the side effects of

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Speaker 2: the treatment, and that she took rather well the treatments

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Speaker 2: the first week, and then the second week, you know,

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Speaker 2: she still would and I don't even know how she

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Speaker 2: did it, but she she started horseback riding again and

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Speaker 2: I think she got first placed the first time. She

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Speaker 2: goes out there and competes again. And then she was

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Speaker 2: going she's resilient. Yeah, And then she was going to

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Speaker 2: all the hard workouts that I'd like to go to,

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Speaker 2: and she was doing them with me. You know, obviously

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Speaker 2: not at one hundred percent, but she was there, you know,

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Speaker 2: moving her body and and and trying and and and

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Speaker 2: again they're not easy workouts, but yet she was there

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Speaker 2: doing them. So so that was going well. And then

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Speaker 2: the second week, uh, it started hitting her a little more,

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Speaker 2: the radiation started kicking a little more. Yeah, and so yeah,

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Speaker 2: so she's continuing to fight and uh and yeah, she's

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Speaker 2: you know, progressing as much as she can be right now.

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Speaker 2: But now we got to wait to see if the

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Speaker 2: treatment works.

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Speaker 1: So right, how has it affected your relationship in a

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Speaker 1: good or bad way way? I mean going through this together,

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Speaker 1: because it sounds like when she's working out with you

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Speaker 1: and spending time with you, it's like things are back

355
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Speaker 1: to normal, right, but yeah, there's so much going on

356
00:20:14,440 --> 00:20:19,160
Speaker 1: feeling wise. Are you guys still connected, did you reconnect

357
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Speaker 1: or is it just been like we're going to get

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Speaker 1: through this and that's it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. I think it's just been we're going to get

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Speaker 2: through this right now, and I mean that's the first thing,

361
00:20:29,640 --> 00:20:33,240
Speaker 2: is just making sure that we take care of this first,

362
00:20:33,320 --> 00:20:38,120
Speaker 2: and and all that other stuff. You know, we'll see

363
00:20:38,119 --> 00:20:41,080
Speaker 2: what happens with time, but you know, right now, it's

364
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Speaker 2: just more of like, how do we take care of you?

365
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Speaker 2: And how how can we get you back to normal

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Speaker 2: as fast as possible, and you know that other stuff.

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Speaker 2: You know, we'll figure itself out, you know.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, So you guys, are you guys spending more time

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Speaker 1: together or is it just because she needs so much

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Speaker 1: so much help right now that you're spending time with her, Like.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it were what there's not much time we can spend, uh,

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Speaker 2: Like it's you know, I'm still having to go to

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Speaker 2: work and she's still working as you know. Yeah, and

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Speaker 2: then we got the kids and stuff, so it's not

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Speaker 2: like we can really work on that side of it yet.

376
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Speaker 2: But we're just you know, I'm home now most of

377
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Speaker 2: the time, So you know, we were doing nesting, yeah,

378
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Speaker 2: which was basically nesting is basically when you have whoever

379
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Speaker 2: has custody the kids gets to stay at the main house,

380
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Speaker 2: whoever doesn't at that time has to move out. Okay,

381
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Speaker 2: So that's what we were doing. So whenever's whenever it

382
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Speaker 2: was my time to be with the kids, I'd stay

383
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Speaker 2: at our main house. Yeah, and then when it was

384
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Speaker 2: her time to have the kids, then I'd move out

385
00:22:03,960 --> 00:22:07,879
Speaker 2: and go to the other house. Now I'm back to

386
00:22:07,960 --> 00:22:10,600
Speaker 2: basically staying here in ninety She's staying one hundred percent

387
00:22:10,640 --> 00:22:12,720
Speaker 2: of the time here now, okay, and then I'll stay

388
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Speaker 2: in ninety percent of the time here, and then you know,

389
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Speaker 2: whenever our living housekeepers here, then I'll stay at another

390
00:22:22,640 --> 00:22:25,480
Speaker 2: place for a bit. But I typically I'm staying ninety

391
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Speaker 2: percent of the time. So maybe one or two days

392
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Speaker 2: out of the week I'm not at the house, but

393
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Speaker 2: the other days I'm here. So and a big part

394
00:22:33,400 --> 00:22:36,280
Speaker 2: of that too is I want I want the kids

395
00:22:36,320 --> 00:22:39,880
Speaker 2: to see me here as well, so again to kind

396
00:22:39,920 --> 00:22:45,640
Speaker 2: of transfer that confidence and certainty that yeah, because sometimes

397
00:22:45,720 --> 00:22:48,800
Speaker 2: you know, mom, if they feel Mom is sick, they

398
00:22:48,880 --> 00:22:52,640
Speaker 2: might they don't feel as comfortable. Right, What if mom

399
00:22:52,680 --> 00:22:54,720
Speaker 2: doesn't can't get up and help me out in the

400
00:22:54,760 --> 00:22:57,080
Speaker 2: middle of the night, is what Cruz says, right, So

401
00:22:57,680 --> 00:23:01,159
Speaker 2: that's another reason why I like to stay. Yeah.

402
00:23:01,320 --> 00:23:05,000
Speaker 1: So I have an interesting question, you know, being public

403
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Speaker 1: figures and you know, having wives that are celebrities, I

404
00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:12,520
Speaker 1: would imagine that this would be a time where you

405
00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:18,000
Speaker 1: just want ultimate privacy. Do you agree or how do

406
00:23:18,040 --> 00:23:20,080
Speaker 1: you deal with that? You know, how do you deal

407
00:23:20,119 --> 00:23:23,400
Speaker 1: with being the public guye and seeing all these tabloids

408
00:23:23,400 --> 00:23:26,120
Speaker 1: and all these news about what's going on with your

409
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Speaker 1: wife and it's like, this is private shit? Why is

410
00:23:29,000 --> 00:23:32,240
Speaker 1: it out there? Kind of thing that that's my thought, right.

411
00:23:32,119 --> 00:23:34,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I don't look at it. I haven't looked

412
00:23:34,960 --> 00:23:37,600
Speaker 2: at it. I probably looked at it more when we

413
00:23:37,600 --> 00:23:42,280
Speaker 2: were going through our divorce. This I haven't had time

414
00:23:42,320 --> 00:23:44,920
Speaker 2: to look at it period, and frankly, I just don't

415
00:23:44,920 --> 00:23:47,760
Speaker 2: want to even be reminded of it. And then, you know,

416
00:23:47,800 --> 00:23:51,360
Speaker 2: as far as like dealing with out in the public,

417
00:23:51,600 --> 00:23:55,480
Speaker 2: I've tried to just stay as low key as possible. Yeah,

418
00:23:55,560 --> 00:23:57,880
Speaker 2: even before this happened, I was trying to be low key.

419
00:23:58,040 --> 00:23:59,879
Speaker 2: You know, there's restaurants you can go to that if

420
00:24:00,320 --> 00:24:02,239
Speaker 2: if you want to get noticed and you want the

421
00:24:02,280 --> 00:24:04,399
Speaker 2: paparazzi to get you, you can go to I just

422
00:24:05,200 --> 00:24:07,080
Speaker 2: I already know which those places are. So I just

423
00:24:07,119 --> 00:24:10,680
Speaker 2: try to keep it low key and just not even

424
00:24:10,720 --> 00:24:11,200
Speaker 2: deal with it.

425
00:24:12,320 --> 00:24:16,320
Speaker 1: Well, even on my end, not even my wife, but

426
00:24:16,600 --> 00:24:19,800
Speaker 1: I have a lot of fans that I chat with

427
00:24:19,880 --> 00:24:22,639
Speaker 1: on Instagram, and I can't tell you how many people

428
00:24:22,680 --> 00:24:26,480
Speaker 1: have been, you know, praying, sending prayers for Teddy and you,

429
00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:29,840
Speaker 1: and I's been hoping, yeah, that you guys are going

430
00:24:29,920 --> 00:24:32,560
Speaker 1: to make it through this, and and some of them

431
00:24:32,600 --> 00:24:34,840
Speaker 1: ask me like, how is she doing? What's going on?

432
00:24:34,960 --> 00:24:38,520
Speaker 1: I'm like, it's not my place, you know, Frankly, I

433
00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:41,400
Speaker 1: don't know what's going on because I'm I don't know,

434
00:24:41,560 --> 00:24:45,280
Speaker 1: you know. I just I think it's such a private matter.

435
00:24:46,200 --> 00:24:49,080
Speaker 1: I mean, my wife is all about it because she's

436
00:24:49,240 --> 00:24:53,560
Speaker 1: she was so devastated when this happened, and she's feeling

437
00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:57,760
Speaker 1: better now, but but she The only other time I've

438
00:24:57,760 --> 00:25:00,960
Speaker 1: ever seen my wife feel this way and and so

439
00:25:01,119 --> 00:25:07,119
Speaker 1: overwhelmed and kind of just frozen is when when she

440
00:25:07,280 --> 00:25:10,359
Speaker 1: was going through her divorce and the X was trying

441
00:25:10,359 --> 00:25:12,760
Speaker 1: to take the kids away and doing everything you could

442
00:25:12,840 --> 00:25:15,679
Speaker 1: and when we ended up losing her eldest daughter to

443
00:25:15,800 --> 00:25:19,480
Speaker 1: him to his lives and manipulation, that's when she kind

444
00:25:19,480 --> 00:25:24,680
Speaker 1: of went into kind of like froze, like just coulmfunction.

445
00:25:25,240 --> 00:25:26,360
Speaker 1: And this is the only other thing.

446
00:25:26,560 --> 00:25:31,280
Speaker 2: That paralyzation that you know, fear gives you through responses

447
00:25:31,320 --> 00:25:33,560
Speaker 2: to the future. It paralyzes you, right, it's like you frege.

448
00:25:34,320 --> 00:25:34,560
Speaker 1: Yeah.

449
00:25:35,040 --> 00:25:37,880
Speaker 2: The procrastination comes next, where you know you got to move,

450
00:25:37,920 --> 00:25:41,200
Speaker 2: but you're still frozen. Yeah, and then the paranoia comes next,

451
00:25:41,200 --> 00:25:44,639
Speaker 2: which is that's all the thoughts in your head and

452
00:25:44,680 --> 00:25:46,960
Speaker 2: that's what gets you in that low frequency state. And

453
00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:49,960
Speaker 2: again again, if you think about anytime you're overthinking stuff,

454
00:25:50,000 --> 00:25:55,800
Speaker 2: it's always bad things. You never overthink good stuff. And

455
00:25:55,840 --> 00:25:57,880
Speaker 2: it's why I think it's so important to have clarity,

456
00:25:58,680 --> 00:26:01,199
Speaker 2: because clarity, I think gives you confidence. When you have clarity,

457
00:26:01,200 --> 00:26:03,800
Speaker 2: you don't have time to think, yeah, because you know

458
00:26:03,920 --> 00:26:07,560
Speaker 2: exactly what you need to do. And because of that,

459
00:26:07,800 --> 00:26:10,119
Speaker 2: everything's reflexive. You're not in your head. You're just like,

460
00:26:10,160 --> 00:26:11,920
Speaker 2: all right, I got to do this, this, this, this, this,

461
00:26:12,680 --> 00:26:16,320
Speaker 2: and every time you get these things done, you kind

462
00:26:16,320 --> 00:26:21,280
Speaker 2: of fuel yourself with enthusiasm, right, Yeah, Hey, good and

463
00:26:21,280 --> 00:26:24,399
Speaker 2: that's why I've always said the for me, at least,

464
00:26:25,240 --> 00:26:28,280
Speaker 2: the cure to anxiety, to worry, to frustration has always

465
00:26:28,320 --> 00:26:31,159
Speaker 2: been taking action towards those things that I know that

466
00:26:31,240 --> 00:26:35,760
Speaker 2: are worrying me, right, yeah, And that's kind of the

467
00:26:36,119 --> 00:26:40,000
Speaker 2: approach I've I've taken, you know, and I've learned a

468
00:26:40,000 --> 00:26:43,080
Speaker 2: lot about you know, what's going on with Teddy as well.

469
00:26:43,119 --> 00:26:45,000
Speaker 2: Like I never thought I was gonna learn that much

470
00:26:45,000 --> 00:26:50,960
Speaker 2: about cancer, but I've had to. What you learn, I

471
00:26:51,080 --> 00:26:54,040
Speaker 2: just like the way the tumors were working, you know,

472
00:26:54,160 --> 00:27:00,880
Speaker 2: the expectancy of it, the chances of survival, the difference

473
00:27:00,920 --> 00:27:07,400
Speaker 2: between the melanoma type tumor versus like your traditional type tumor.

474
00:27:08,240 --> 00:27:11,760
Speaker 2: You know what immunotherapy is with radiation all that.

475
00:27:11,960 --> 00:27:15,200
Speaker 1: You know, what is immunotherapy? I don't know, I've never

476
00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:16,679
Speaker 1: heard of that until so.

477
00:27:17,640 --> 00:27:23,880
Speaker 2: Yeah. So immunotherapy, my understanding is that it attacks cancers,

478
00:27:24,119 --> 00:27:29,840
Speaker 2: It attacks potential cancer cells, and it specifically attacks them,

479
00:27:30,240 --> 00:27:36,520
Speaker 2: whereas chemotherapy just attacks all of your cells. Right, So, immunotherapy,

480
00:27:36,560 --> 00:27:41,320
Speaker 2: because it's specific with which ones, it doesn't hit you

481
00:27:41,359 --> 00:27:47,320
Speaker 2: as bad as chemotherapy, but it also prevents potential tumors

482
00:27:48,200 --> 00:27:50,600
Speaker 2: to not come out because it's attacking them before they

483
00:27:50,640 --> 00:27:54,760
Speaker 2: come out. So not only does it help with the

484
00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:58,960
Speaker 2: existing tumors, but it will also help you with potential

485
00:27:58,960 --> 00:28:04,919
Speaker 2: ones that might come out later. So interesting. And what

486
00:28:04,960 --> 00:28:07,960
Speaker 2: I also learned about immunia therapy is that it actually

487
00:28:08,280 --> 00:28:12,239
Speaker 2: was It's been around since like the eighties, but then

488
00:28:12,280 --> 00:28:15,639
Speaker 2: it got banned from the US because don't quote me

489
00:28:15,680 --> 00:28:17,600
Speaker 2: on this, but I think it was because of AIDS,

490
00:28:19,480 --> 00:28:22,240
Speaker 2: and then they just brought it back I think in

491
00:28:22,280 --> 00:28:26,520
Speaker 2: twenty fifteen, and it's still banned, but only for certain

492
00:28:26,600 --> 00:28:30,840
Speaker 2: type of cancers they allow it, So milanoma being one of.

493
00:28:30,840 --> 00:28:35,480
Speaker 1: Them, right, that's interesting. Yeah, is she going through radiation

494
00:28:35,600 --> 00:28:36,000
Speaker 1: as well?

495
00:28:36,760 --> 00:28:40,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, she's going through radiation as well, So the radiation

496
00:28:40,400 --> 00:28:43,719
Speaker 2: will help with the brain, the immunotherapy will help with

497
00:28:45,040 --> 00:28:49,560
Speaker 2: the two that she has in the lungs, and then

498
00:28:49,880 --> 00:28:55,080
Speaker 2: it also helps with potential future ones that will come out. Yeah.

499
00:28:55,160 --> 00:28:57,479
Speaker 2: What a fight, at least that's my understanding of it.

500
00:28:59,800 --> 00:29:02,000
Speaker 1: I can't even imagine what that'd be like. And I

501
00:29:02,360 --> 00:29:04,160
Speaker 1: can't even imagine what it'd be like being in your

502
00:29:04,160 --> 00:29:07,320
Speaker 1: shoes and you know, having to deal with that situation,

503
00:29:08,000 --> 00:29:11,640
Speaker 1: especially with somebody who you deep down inside truly love

504
00:29:11,880 --> 00:29:13,520
Speaker 1: you know, not just as.

505
00:29:14,680 --> 00:29:16,240
Speaker 2: I was just going to say, and again it's it's

506
00:29:17,560 --> 00:29:20,800
Speaker 2: the friends. The family have just steps up, have stepped

507
00:29:20,840 --> 00:29:26,000
Speaker 2: up so much that it has allowed me to still

508
00:29:26,520 --> 00:29:28,240
Speaker 2: do the things that I need to do to work

509
00:29:28,280 --> 00:29:31,840
Speaker 2: on myself, right, because you can't if you can't help yourself,

510
00:29:32,160 --> 00:29:33,600
Speaker 2: you can't help anybody.

511
00:29:33,160 --> 00:29:35,480
Speaker 1: Else, right, So I always said that.

512
00:29:36,920 --> 00:29:39,360
Speaker 2: So like, you know, I like I still do my

513
00:29:39,400 --> 00:29:43,200
Speaker 2: workouts every morning, like that's sort of a non negotiable

514
00:29:43,240 --> 00:29:47,040
Speaker 2: for me. You know, my gratitude exercise in the morning,

515
00:29:47,080 --> 00:29:51,440
Speaker 2: that's a non negotiable for me as well. You know,

516
00:29:51,440 --> 00:29:55,760
Speaker 2: I'm still I'm getting my sleep, you know, all those

517
00:29:55,840 --> 00:29:59,000
Speaker 2: things that you sort of need to be functioning at

518
00:29:59,040 --> 00:30:03,720
Speaker 2: a at a high see, yeah, at a high level.

519
00:30:04,400 --> 00:30:07,640
Speaker 2: So at least for me, that's that those are I'd

520
00:30:07,640 --> 00:30:10,280
Speaker 2: still been able to do kind of those things and

521
00:30:10,280 --> 00:30:12,360
Speaker 2: and still have a little time for me where you

522
00:30:12,440 --> 00:30:15,120
Speaker 2: have not you know, you have you find a way

523
00:30:15,160 --> 00:30:18,400
Speaker 2: to have a little fun, right Yeah, watching a game

524
00:30:18,440 --> 00:30:21,000
Speaker 2: here and there, you know, going to dinner with a

525
00:30:21,040 --> 00:30:21,960
Speaker 2: friend here and there.

526
00:30:23,160 --> 00:30:26,600
Speaker 1: Spending time with the kids, doing that a lot of that.

527
00:30:27,120 --> 00:30:29,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, time with the kids, you know, one of

528
00:30:29,080 --> 00:30:35,240
Speaker 2: the things that's interesting, U huh. Ironically, this moment in

529
00:30:35,280 --> 00:30:38,840
Speaker 2: my life, it's brought me a lot of peace, really,

530
00:30:39,200 --> 00:30:42,080
Speaker 2: And the reason it's brought me a lot of peace

531
00:30:42,400 --> 00:30:46,360
Speaker 2: is it's I don't know forced is the right word,

532
00:30:46,360 --> 00:30:49,880
Speaker 2: but it's it's forced me to be more present. And

533
00:30:50,480 --> 00:30:54,920
Speaker 2: I think in the past, I was always in the

534
00:30:54,960 --> 00:30:58,880
Speaker 2: future because I was always in the future where you

535
00:30:58,920 --> 00:31:01,360
Speaker 2: can't control the future. So there's there's a part of

536
00:31:01,480 --> 00:31:07,479
Speaker 2: your piece that gets robbed, right, because the only time,

537
00:31:07,520 --> 00:31:08,960
Speaker 2: if you think about it, the only time you could

538
00:31:08,960 --> 00:31:12,080
Speaker 2: have peace is in the present because you don't know

539
00:31:12,120 --> 00:31:14,320
Speaker 2: what's going to happen in the future. Right. So I'm

540
00:31:14,360 --> 00:31:17,160
Speaker 2: here with you now, but I'm thinking about me having

541
00:31:17,560 --> 00:31:20,320
Speaker 2: what I have to do on a Saturday. I'm here

542
00:31:20,360 --> 00:31:22,920
Speaker 2: with you, but I don't really have peace because I'm

543
00:31:22,960 --> 00:31:28,320
Speaker 2: thinking about tomorrow, right. And what I realized is just

544
00:31:28,360 --> 00:31:31,720
Speaker 2: these last six months, I've been able to be more

545
00:31:32,080 --> 00:31:33,960
Speaker 2: present because I realized there's a lot of things that

546
00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:37,040
Speaker 2: I thought mattered that don't really matter. And all these

547
00:31:37,360 --> 00:31:40,040
Speaker 2: things that I thought we're going to be the end

548
00:31:40,080 --> 00:31:42,680
Speaker 2: of the world aren't the end of the world. You know.

549
00:31:42,720 --> 00:31:45,680
Speaker 2: I used to think I can't drive my kids to

550
00:31:45,800 --> 00:31:48,000
Speaker 2: school because I have to do this, this, this, this,

551
00:31:48,040 --> 00:31:49,520
Speaker 2: and I got to finish this project. I got to

552
00:31:49,520 --> 00:31:52,800
Speaker 2: finish that project. And when all this thing started six

553
00:31:52,840 --> 00:31:55,720
Speaker 2: months ago, I had to take the kids to school

554
00:31:55,760 --> 00:31:58,160
Speaker 2: and I had to be present. And then I thought

555
00:31:58,200 --> 00:32:03,000
Speaker 2: to myself, if everything fall because of that, who cares?

556
00:32:03,280 --> 00:32:05,360
Speaker 2: Oh well, and I let it go. And the next

557
00:32:05,360 --> 00:32:07,720
Speaker 2: thing I know, I'm like, wait, it didn't fall apart.

558
00:32:08,360 --> 00:32:10,160
Speaker 2: I could actually do this, and you know what, it

559
00:32:10,200 --> 00:32:12,719
Speaker 2: wasn't that hard. It was just yeah, and it was

560
00:32:12,800 --> 00:32:17,320
Speaker 2: I enjoyed it. So I've been more present with just

561
00:32:17,400 --> 00:32:21,040
Speaker 2: everything that I'm doing now, and that's that's brought me

562
00:32:21,080 --> 00:32:23,040
Speaker 2: a lot of peace, if that makes any sense.

563
00:32:23,320 --> 00:32:27,800
Speaker 1: One and a lot.

564
00:32:27,640 --> 00:32:30,040
Speaker 2: Of that has come because again it goes back to

565
00:32:30,960 --> 00:32:33,280
Speaker 2: just it's probably what Tama was feeling, right. It's just

566
00:32:33,480 --> 00:32:36,480
Speaker 2: when someone that close to you is going through what

567
00:32:36,480 --> 00:32:40,680
Speaker 2: they're going through, you realize again that just all these

568
00:32:40,720 --> 00:32:44,600
Speaker 2: things that you think matter don't really matter. So let

569
00:32:44,600 --> 00:32:47,720
Speaker 2: me just put my phone down for three hours, let

570
00:32:47,720 --> 00:32:50,400
Speaker 2: me focus on what I'm doing right now in this moment.

571
00:32:51,400 --> 00:32:53,800
Speaker 2: And you know what, if something happens in the next

572
00:32:53,800 --> 00:32:56,720
Speaker 2: three hours and I can't get to my phone because

573
00:32:56,760 --> 00:32:58,000
Speaker 2: of work. So what.

574
00:33:06,000 --> 00:33:08,840
Speaker 1: I saw a quote on social media recently and I

575
00:33:08,880 --> 00:33:09,640
Speaker 1: reposted it.

576
00:33:09,640 --> 00:33:10,320
Speaker 2: It was, you.

577
00:33:12,000 --> 00:33:15,239
Speaker 1: Have a thousand problems until you get sick, and then

578
00:33:15,280 --> 00:33:20,760
Speaker 1: you have one problem, and it's very eye opening. It

579
00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:24,560
Speaker 1: kind of opened up my eyes a ton when it

580
00:33:24,600 --> 00:33:27,880
Speaker 1: happened to me. I never thought it would ever, especially

581
00:33:27,880 --> 00:33:30,120
Speaker 1: a health scare like this. Whatever happen to me, but

582
00:33:31,520 --> 00:33:33,200
Speaker 1: it opened up my eyes. And like you said, I

583
00:33:33,280 --> 00:33:37,520
Speaker 1: was very present and really diligent about learning as much

584
00:33:37,560 --> 00:33:40,520
Speaker 1: as I could about the disease I was dealing with.

585
00:33:41,720 --> 00:33:48,200
Speaker 1: And I can't emphasize enough how rewarding or how comforting

586
00:33:48,400 --> 00:33:54,400
Speaker 1: it is to have your significant other there for you

587
00:33:54,720 --> 00:33:59,920
Speaker 1: at the hospital, going to the doctors and almost translating

588
00:34:00,280 --> 00:34:02,720
Speaker 1: what the doctor is saying, because you know when, like

589
00:34:02,800 --> 00:34:05,880
Speaker 1: you said, I'm there, but I'm thinking, am I going

590
00:34:05,960 --> 00:34:06,320
Speaker 1: to be?

591
00:34:06,560 --> 00:34:07,320
Speaker 2: Okay? Am I?

592
00:34:07,440 --> 00:34:10,040
Speaker 1: I'm thinking, you know, ten years from now, where am

593
00:34:10,080 --> 00:34:12,560
Speaker 1: I going to be? So I'm listening to maybe a

594
00:34:12,640 --> 00:34:15,000
Speaker 1: quarter of what the doctor is saying. And when we

595
00:34:15,040 --> 00:34:16,960
Speaker 1: get home, my wife's like, did you hear what the

596
00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:19,200
Speaker 1: doctor said? He said so and so and so, And

597
00:34:19,239 --> 00:34:21,839
Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't remember him saying that, you know,

598
00:34:21,880 --> 00:34:26,440
Speaker 1: because my head was somewhere else. Yeah, So to have

599
00:34:26,560 --> 00:34:30,200
Speaker 1: somebody you know, support me like that and and bring

600
00:34:30,239 --> 00:34:33,160
Speaker 1: clarity to what, you know, the path I need to

601
00:34:33,160 --> 00:34:38,239
Speaker 1: take to beat this disease is it's priceless. I mean,

602
00:34:38,680 --> 00:34:42,040
Speaker 1: I mean it. I commend you for being there for

603
00:34:42,080 --> 00:34:45,520
Speaker 1: her and you know, being the support that she needs.

604
00:34:45,719 --> 00:34:48,600
Speaker 1: And how lucky is she to have such wonderful friends

605
00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:51,279
Speaker 1: and family to be there as well and take that

606
00:34:51,400 --> 00:34:54,319
Speaker 1: load off of you, but maybe even not even take

607
00:34:54,320 --> 00:34:58,080
Speaker 1: a load off of you, but contribute to her confidence

608
00:34:58,160 --> 00:35:00,840
Speaker 1: and her positivity that she's going to get through this,

609
00:35:00,880 --> 00:35:03,359
Speaker 1: because I see that in her. I mean every time

610
00:35:03,400 --> 00:35:05,640
Speaker 1: Tamra comes and you know, she's crying about it and

611
00:35:05,680 --> 00:35:07,880
Speaker 1: she's feeling sad about it, like she's going to be okay.

612
00:35:08,080 --> 00:35:10,919
Speaker 1: I there's something about Teddy. I see that she's really

613
00:35:10,960 --> 00:35:13,880
Speaker 1: a strong warrior, and I think she's going to be okay.

614
00:35:14,000 --> 00:35:16,840
Speaker 1: But I don't know any other way, you know, to

615
00:35:17,680 --> 00:35:21,160
Speaker 1: help my wife, or any other way to think but positive,

616
00:35:21,560 --> 00:35:24,719
Speaker 1: you know. And I just wish you, guys well for

617
00:35:25,760 --> 00:35:29,600
Speaker 1: you know, the getting through this, and you know, I

618
00:35:29,600 --> 00:35:32,720
Speaker 1: think it would make your relationship stronger, you know, wherever

619
00:35:32,760 --> 00:35:35,600
Speaker 1: that goes, you know, even if you're just friends. I

620
00:35:35,600 --> 00:35:38,360
Speaker 1: think it'll make that relationship stronger between you guys and

621
00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:38,880
Speaker 1: the family.

622
00:35:40,719 --> 00:35:43,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, I think you hit the name on the

623
00:35:43,160 --> 00:35:45,799
Speaker 2: head in regards to just being positive with stuff. You know,

624
00:35:45,960 --> 00:35:48,920
Speaker 2: it takes the same amount of mental energy to focus

625
00:35:49,000 --> 00:35:52,920
Speaker 2: on success than it does on failures. So you know,

626
00:35:53,000 --> 00:35:56,399
Speaker 2: for me, I think a big part of getting through

627
00:35:56,440 --> 00:35:59,640
Speaker 2: this has just been focusing on the positive, you know,

628
00:35:59,800 --> 00:36:03,040
Speaker 2: nicety percent. I've always said this, ninety percent of winning

629
00:36:03,080 --> 00:36:07,920
Speaker 2: in life is just being positive. And you know, the

630
00:36:07,960 --> 00:36:10,680
Speaker 2: faith fear right projection of the most positive thing for

631
00:36:10,719 --> 00:36:12,920
Speaker 2: the future, of fear, projection of the worst possible thing

632
00:36:12,960 --> 00:36:17,239
Speaker 2: for the future. I've always chosen to just focus on

633
00:36:17,239 --> 00:36:21,279
Speaker 2: on the faith part and just controlling what you can

634
00:36:21,360 --> 00:36:25,440
Speaker 2: control and leaving all that stuff that you can't control.

635
00:36:25,920 --> 00:36:28,280
Speaker 2: That's where your faith comes in and you lean on faith.

636
00:36:28,320 --> 00:36:34,279
Speaker 2: And you know, I can't focus on Teddy maybe not

637
00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:37,239
Speaker 2: making it like I can't control that, right, I can

638
00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:41,920
Speaker 2: only focus on what I can't control, and that's also

639
00:36:41,920 --> 00:36:45,919
Speaker 2: given me peace. Right, it's we can focus on making

640
00:36:45,960 --> 00:36:49,000
Speaker 2: sure that she gets the best treatments that you know,

641
00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:56,759
Speaker 2: she is around and she's happy, Like, that's what we

642
00:36:56,840 --> 00:37:00,360
Speaker 2: can control. All that other stuff. You know, you just

643
00:37:00,360 --> 00:37:02,200
Speaker 2: have faith that it's going to work itself out and

644
00:37:02,600 --> 00:37:06,280
Speaker 2: you don't really think about it. Like if I focus

645
00:37:06,360 --> 00:37:09,560
Speaker 2: on that, then I'm just doing myself a disservice, which

646
00:37:09,600 --> 00:37:12,359
Speaker 2: then I'll do my kids disservice. So I just got

647
00:37:12,360 --> 00:37:16,480
Speaker 2: to again focus on on the positive and not and

648
00:37:16,520 --> 00:37:18,840
Speaker 2: then and that's where the piece comes in as well.

649
00:37:19,640 --> 00:37:24,480
Speaker 2: And take it day by day, focus on today, focus

650
00:37:24,560 --> 00:37:28,360
Speaker 2: on the progress that you're making, and that that alone

651
00:37:28,360 --> 00:37:32,359
Speaker 2: would give you the piece. And man, I can't I

652
00:37:32,360 --> 00:37:36,960
Speaker 2: can't stress enough the importance of just cultivating gratitude every morning,

653
00:37:37,200 --> 00:37:40,840
Speaker 2: you know, you know, bitterness requires you to live in

654
00:37:40,880 --> 00:37:43,920
Speaker 2: the past. Hope requires you to live in the future.

655
00:37:44,680 --> 00:37:48,680
Speaker 2: The beautiful thing about gratitude is not only does it

656
00:37:48,800 --> 00:37:52,520
Speaker 2: allow you to enjoy the present, but it allows you

657
00:37:52,560 --> 00:37:55,200
Speaker 2: to look forward to the future. But if you can

658
00:37:55,239 --> 00:37:57,600
Speaker 2: focus on the present, that that's where that piece comes in.

659
00:37:57,640 --> 00:38:00,719
Speaker 2: And that was the big revelation for me last six months,

660
00:38:00,760 --> 00:38:03,600
Speaker 2: is that is just being more present is giving me

661
00:38:03,920 --> 00:38:05,839
Speaker 2: so much peace. I've been in so much peace, yet

662
00:38:05,880 --> 00:38:08,760
Speaker 2: I'm going through like probably the darkest valley of my life,

663
00:38:08,760 --> 00:38:14,480
Speaker 2: which is again ironic, but you know, it's that's sometimes

664
00:38:14,480 --> 00:38:18,279
Speaker 2: when you go through these moments, you get revelations like that.

665
00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:23,680
Speaker 1: So yeah, that's actually wonderful advice for anybody that you

666
00:38:23,719 --> 00:38:27,680
Speaker 1: know might be experiencing something like this with their significant

667
00:38:27,680 --> 00:38:32,279
Speaker 1: other or even a friend or you know. It's a

668
00:38:32,320 --> 00:38:36,520
Speaker 1: tough place to be man, and I wish you guys,

669
00:38:36,600 --> 00:38:39,560
Speaker 1: you know, all the best and praying for you guys

670
00:38:39,600 --> 00:38:42,880
Speaker 1: every day and thinking about you all the time.

671
00:38:43,360 --> 00:38:46,680
Speaker 2: I was gonna say one thing about gratitude is it

672
00:38:46,680 --> 00:38:51,480
Speaker 2: it won't change your current situation, but it does change

673
00:38:51,480 --> 00:38:54,279
Speaker 2: your heart, right, And when you have gratitude in your heart,

674
00:38:54,320 --> 00:38:57,240
Speaker 2: you can't be worried, you can't be angry. You basically

675
00:38:57,320 --> 00:39:04,920
Speaker 2: have love, joy, peace, you know, patient and goodness, kindness, faithfulness, gentleness,

676
00:39:04,920 --> 00:39:08,600
Speaker 2: and self control in your heart. And that's the importance

677
00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:12,279
Speaker 2: of that gratitude and a simple exercise for anybody that

678
00:39:12,400 --> 00:39:15,560
Speaker 2: wants to cultivate that in the morning. I do it

679
00:39:15,600 --> 00:39:19,719
Speaker 2: all the time. Is seven questions I asked myself. A

680
00:39:19,880 --> 00:39:24,799
Speaker 2: mentor mind taught me this is what am I happy about? Right?

681
00:39:25,080 --> 00:39:28,319
Speaker 2: What am I excited about? What am I grateful for?

682
00:39:28,719 --> 00:39:31,520
Speaker 2: What am I proud of? What am I committed to?

683
00:39:32,040 --> 00:39:35,960
Speaker 2: What am I enjoying and what do I love? And

684
00:39:36,000 --> 00:39:38,279
Speaker 2: then the sub question of that is what about it

685
00:39:38,320 --> 00:39:43,799
Speaker 2: makes me feel that way powerful? Yeah? Seveny morning, I

686
00:39:43,880 --> 00:39:46,759
Speaker 2: just asking myself those questions, And what happens is when

687
00:39:46,800 --> 00:39:50,000
Speaker 2: you start looking, when you start answering those questions, your

688
00:39:50,080 --> 00:39:54,120
Speaker 2: mind throughout the day will find answers to those questions.

689
00:39:54,640 --> 00:39:58,080
Speaker 2: Yeah right, because you were pre programmed to worry all

690
00:39:58,120 --> 00:40:01,279
Speaker 2: the time. So if you can sort of change that

691
00:40:01,440 --> 00:40:05,400
Speaker 2: up by cultivating the gratitude, then it allows you to

692
00:40:05,440 --> 00:40:11,680
Speaker 2: live inside out versus exterior in. So I like that

693
00:40:12,040 --> 00:40:16,000
Speaker 2: exterior in For me from my own experience was I

694
00:40:16,120 --> 00:40:20,080
Speaker 2: used to think that, you know, big houses, cars, women,

695
00:40:20,560 --> 00:40:24,279
Speaker 2: alcohol brought me pleasure, I mean brought me happiness. And

696
00:40:24,320 --> 00:40:26,560
Speaker 2: when I realized those things never brought me happiness, they

697
00:40:26,560 --> 00:40:30,680
Speaker 2: brought me pleasure. And there's nothing wrong with pleasure. It's

698
00:40:30,719 --> 00:40:34,000
Speaker 2: just knowing that because it's a sensation, it's always going

699
00:40:34,080 --> 00:40:39,879
Speaker 2: to be unstable because in the scales of life, that

700
00:40:40,560 --> 00:40:44,080
Speaker 2: pleasure sensation is always going to get balanced out by

701
00:40:44,120 --> 00:40:46,640
Speaker 2: the pain and discomfort that you have to go through.

702
00:40:47,040 --> 00:40:50,440
Speaker 2: So all that exterior stuff, eventually it's not going to

703
00:40:50,480 --> 00:40:54,279
Speaker 2: give you happiness. But what gives you that happiness from

704
00:40:54,280 --> 00:40:57,799
Speaker 2: my experience, is living inside out, which is that gratitude,

705
00:40:57,840 --> 00:41:01,680
Speaker 2: cultivating gratitude and learning how to take a negative and

706
00:41:01,760 --> 00:41:05,719
Speaker 2: turning it into a positive. So it's kind of the law.

707
00:41:05,960 --> 00:41:10,520
Speaker 2: They call it the law of repurpose. So if you

708
00:41:10,600 --> 00:41:13,439
Speaker 2: really think about when things are happening to you, there's

709
00:41:13,520 --> 00:41:17,040
Speaker 2: you could always make a positive out of it. And

710
00:41:17,920 --> 00:41:21,320
Speaker 2: that's what allows you to. Because life and pain are inseparable,

711
00:41:21,360 --> 00:41:24,279
Speaker 2: You're going to have to go through pain. And the

712
00:41:24,400 --> 00:41:27,080
Speaker 2: more you realize that pain is just part of life,

713
00:41:27,160 --> 00:41:30,319
Speaker 2: it's and you can continue to go through pain, you

714
00:41:30,400 --> 00:41:35,839
Speaker 2: realize that it's not hard anymore because you're you're used

715
00:41:35,880 --> 00:41:37,480
Speaker 2: to going through it, and every time you go through

716
00:41:37,520 --> 00:41:40,319
Speaker 2: it gets less and less harder for you to do it,

717
00:41:41,200 --> 00:41:44,719
Speaker 2: so you embrace it. So for me, that's been it's

718
00:41:44,760 --> 00:41:47,919
Speaker 2: been so key. I mean, it's probably the biggest game

719
00:41:48,000 --> 00:41:51,160
Speaker 2: changer ever ever, is that cultivating gratitude. And I always

720
00:41:51,160 --> 00:41:55,359
Speaker 2: tell people if you struggle with faith, increase your gratitude

721
00:41:55,520 --> 00:41:58,320
Speaker 2: and you'll automatically have more faith. Yeah.

722
00:41:58,640 --> 00:42:05,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, well that's complex but very concise. There's so much

723
00:42:05,480 --> 00:42:11,600
Speaker 1: in that statement you just made. I mean, from understanding

724
00:42:11,680 --> 00:42:15,359
Speaker 1: that you know, cars and houses the big houses and

725
00:42:15,440 --> 00:42:18,640
Speaker 1: how women and all that stuff is sort of in

726
00:42:18,680 --> 00:42:23,600
Speaker 1: the materialistic sector, which never lasts. They never ever lasts.

727
00:42:24,080 --> 00:42:26,719
Speaker 1: So when you have faith and you have confidence, and

728
00:42:26,760 --> 00:42:33,120
Speaker 1: you have a wonderful relationship with yourself, you are open

729
00:42:33,200 --> 00:42:38,440
Speaker 1: to have wonderful relationship with others that you can understand

730
00:42:39,080 --> 00:42:43,120
Speaker 1: what true happiness is. Right, and true happiness starts with you.

731
00:42:43,719 --> 00:42:47,760
Speaker 1: It's not relying on something or someone to make you happy.

732
00:42:48,480 --> 00:42:50,760
Speaker 2: I love that you said that, because it's so the truth.

733
00:42:51,200 --> 00:42:53,560
Speaker 2: If you're about truth, you're able to live in set

734
00:42:53,600 --> 00:42:56,480
Speaker 2: out right techny right when you keep the promises you

735
00:42:56,480 --> 00:42:58,200
Speaker 2: make to yourself. You don't need the you don't need

736
00:42:58,239 --> 00:43:04,440
Speaker 2: the validation of the exterior to make you whole. And uh,

737
00:43:04,520 --> 00:43:07,320
Speaker 2: and again there's nothing wrong with I mean, material stuff

738
00:43:07,400 --> 00:43:12,000
Speaker 2: drove me for a long time until it didn't and

739
00:43:12,040 --> 00:43:16,759
Speaker 2: then the spiritual drives you. And you can't fill a

740
00:43:16,840 --> 00:43:19,239
Speaker 2: spiritual void with the material things.

741
00:43:19,719 --> 00:43:22,440
Speaker 1: And I was like that too when I was younger,

742
00:43:22,520 --> 00:43:24,640
Speaker 1: you know, I wanted that kind of drove me and

743
00:43:24,719 --> 00:43:27,960
Speaker 1: motivated me to want the better things in life, you know,

744
00:43:27,960 --> 00:43:31,040
Speaker 1: the better restaurants, the better cars and stuff like that.

745
00:43:31,920 --> 00:43:34,279
Speaker 1: And now in my fifties, I'm looking back, I'm going

746
00:43:35,760 --> 00:43:38,719
Speaker 1: was it worth it? Well? It was an experience. But

747
00:43:38,800 --> 00:43:41,360
Speaker 1: what I really see that I'm opening up my eyes

748
00:43:41,400 --> 00:43:45,840
Speaker 1: to is so many people out there living that chase life,

749
00:43:45,920 --> 00:43:49,759
Speaker 1: like they have to identify themselves with the Mercedes or

750
00:43:50,400 --> 00:43:54,040
Speaker 1: you know, some sort of materialistic thing, and they might

751
00:43:54,120 --> 00:43:57,319
Speaker 1: even live in an apartment in Newport Beach but drive

752
00:43:57,360 --> 00:44:01,600
Speaker 1: a Ferrari, you know. So that's so insignificant, But I

753
00:44:01,680 --> 00:44:05,680
Speaker 1: understand it. I understand it because nobody has taught that

754
00:44:05,719 --> 00:44:09,000
Speaker 1: person what really matters, and that's who you are.

755
00:44:09,200 --> 00:44:09,440
Speaker 2: You know.

756
00:44:09,920 --> 00:44:14,319
Speaker 1: There's something that I realize also. That stuff can be

757
00:44:14,360 --> 00:44:16,759
Speaker 1: taken away from you. You know, the government can come

758
00:44:16,760 --> 00:44:20,000
Speaker 1: in and you know, claim that they own the land

759
00:44:20,120 --> 00:44:22,680
Speaker 1: or tax the hell out of you, and suddenly you

760
00:44:22,680 --> 00:44:25,400
Speaker 1: can't afford your house anymore. Somebody can steal your car.

761
00:44:25,600 --> 00:44:27,840
Speaker 1: You know, all that stuff can get taken away. But

762
00:44:28,640 --> 00:44:32,880
Speaker 1: your peace of mind, your true value of yourself and

763
00:44:32,920 --> 00:44:36,959
Speaker 1: your family and what really matters your children. I mean,

764
00:44:37,200 --> 00:44:40,400
Speaker 1: nothing can really take that away, that feeling of confidence

765
00:44:40,560 --> 00:44:44,239
Speaker 1: like you have wonderful, wonderful people around you, you're a

766
00:44:44,320 --> 00:44:49,680
Speaker 1: good person. Nobody can take that away. Yeah, it's just

767
00:44:49,719 --> 00:44:53,120
Speaker 1: like knowledge. Nobody can steal your knowledge. You know, they

768
00:44:53,160 --> 00:44:55,719
Speaker 1: can't get in your head and tax you because of

769
00:44:55,760 --> 00:44:57,279
Speaker 1: what you know, at least not yet.

770
00:44:58,800 --> 00:45:01,360
Speaker 2: What I love about when you said is reminds me

771
00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:04,239
Speaker 2: of something that I always talk about it, which is

772
00:45:04,360 --> 00:45:07,080
Speaker 2: when you can't control your talent, you could always control

773
00:45:07,120 --> 00:45:10,520
Speaker 2: your virtue, right, you can always control your character, you know,

774
00:45:10,840 --> 00:45:13,879
Speaker 2: So if you don't, you know, if you don't want

775
00:45:13,920 --> 00:45:16,840
Speaker 2: to be ordinary, like, one of the ways that you

776
00:45:16,880 --> 00:45:20,600
Speaker 2: can control being extraordinary is by your character. Yeah, because

777
00:45:20,640 --> 00:45:23,799
Speaker 2: no one could ever take that away from you, right Yeah,

778
00:45:24,560 --> 00:45:29,000
Speaker 2: And yeah, character is huge, and I think it's one

779
00:45:29,000 --> 00:45:32,839
Speaker 2: of the ways you won't end up alone when you're old. Right, Yeah,

780
00:45:33,200 --> 00:45:35,120
Speaker 2: what a I was just telling this to my friend

781
00:45:35,160 --> 00:45:37,680
Speaker 2: the other day, Like I can't think of anything worse

782
00:45:37,760 --> 00:45:42,279
Speaker 2: being old and being alone because you were always all

783
00:45:42,360 --> 00:45:47,640
Speaker 2: about yourself, right, Because I'm telling you, I mean, I

784
00:45:47,640 --> 00:45:50,320
Speaker 2: don't think when people don't care about you, it doesn't

785
00:45:50,320 --> 00:45:52,600
Speaker 2: matter how much success you had. Like the last thing

786
00:45:52,640 --> 00:45:54,240
Speaker 2: you want to do is listen to an old person,

787
00:45:54,280 --> 00:45:57,360
Speaker 2: and there are things that they used to do before

788
00:45:57,400 --> 00:46:00,400
Speaker 2: and how great they used to be before. Like nobody

789
00:46:00,400 --> 00:46:04,799
Speaker 2: cares unless they actually care about you, right, Yeah, but

790
00:46:04,840 --> 00:46:06,360
Speaker 2: you can have all the fame in the world, you

791
00:46:06,360 --> 00:46:09,239
Speaker 2: can have all the success in the world, you end

792
00:46:09,320 --> 00:46:12,640
Speaker 2: up holding alone. Yeah, I don't want that.

793
00:46:13,840 --> 00:46:16,239
Speaker 1: You know. When I learned that, It's funny. I don't

794
00:46:16,280 --> 00:46:18,560
Speaker 1: remember how. I was probably eight or nine years old,

795
00:46:18,600 --> 00:46:21,839
Speaker 1: maybe a little bit younger, but watching cartoons and you know,

796
00:46:22,160 --> 00:46:25,279
Speaker 1: watching Uncle Scrooge who has all the money in the world,

797
00:46:25,400 --> 00:46:28,600
Speaker 1: but everybody hates them, nobody wants to be around him.

798
00:46:28,680 --> 00:46:31,120
Speaker 1: It's like, that's not the life I want.

799
00:46:31,440 --> 00:46:32,279
Speaker 2: It's not worth it.

800
00:46:33,680 --> 00:46:35,279
Speaker 1: You can have all the money in the world, but

801
00:46:35,440 --> 00:46:38,000
Speaker 1: no health, bad health. I've seen a lot of that too.

802
00:46:38,080 --> 00:46:43,000
Speaker 1: I actually have friends that prioritize making you know, millions

803
00:46:43,080 --> 00:46:46,600
Speaker 1: over their health, and a lot of them have sacrificed

804
00:46:46,640 --> 00:46:49,799
Speaker 1: their relationship with their family to be successful.

805
00:46:57,800 --> 00:47:01,560
Speaker 2: I was interested in your So you went through your

806
00:47:01,920 --> 00:47:06,040
Speaker 2: health scare, right, and that was I mean, I can't

807
00:47:06,080 --> 00:47:08,360
Speaker 2: think of anything worse. You know, you got brain tumors,

808
00:47:08,360 --> 00:47:11,640
Speaker 2: but then you also have heart. Yeah, I mean a

809
00:47:11,680 --> 00:47:14,600
Speaker 2: heart situation is just as scary as a brain tumor,

810
00:47:14,680 --> 00:47:19,720
Speaker 2: I think, right, and you yours? And how was Tamra

811
00:47:19,880 --> 00:47:21,760
Speaker 2: through that whole ordeal?

812
00:47:22,560 --> 00:47:26,600
Speaker 1: You know, she held strong, and I think that's one

813
00:47:26,600 --> 00:47:31,799
Speaker 1: of the other examples that really made me realize how

814
00:47:31,840 --> 00:47:35,520
Speaker 1: strong she is as a woman. She's always there for me.

815
00:47:35,760 --> 00:47:38,239
Speaker 1: She was there at the hospital. You know, she took

816
00:47:38,320 --> 00:47:45,239
Speaker 1: me to the surgeries, she took notes, She really understood

817
00:47:45,239 --> 00:47:47,640
Speaker 1: what's going on, and she helped me understand what the

818
00:47:47,719 --> 00:47:53,120
Speaker 1: doctor was saying. It really was wonderful to have somebody

819
00:47:53,239 --> 00:47:59,200
Speaker 1: like her. You know, she is my wife, but you know,

820
00:47:59,280 --> 00:48:02,240
Speaker 1: our relationship it has always been solid and we support

821
00:48:02,239 --> 00:48:05,160
Speaker 1: each other through it thick and thin. And this is

822
00:48:05,360 --> 00:48:07,359
Speaker 1: this is one of the moments in my life where

823
00:48:07,360 --> 00:48:09,719
Speaker 1: I'm like questioning, what am I going to do? What

824
00:48:09,760 --> 00:48:11,040
Speaker 1: am I gonna do for the rest of my life?

825
00:48:11,040 --> 00:48:15,799
Speaker 1: This is I always identified myself from a health perspective, right,

826
00:48:15,920 --> 00:48:19,040
Speaker 1: I've always made an effort, more of an effort than

827
00:48:19,239 --> 00:48:22,719
Speaker 1: than not to stay healthy, eat healthy, uh, stay away

828
00:48:22,719 --> 00:48:25,360
Speaker 1: from bad foods, you know, stay away from alcohol. And

829
00:48:26,200 --> 00:48:28,120
Speaker 1: I mean I did that stuff when I was younger.

830
00:48:28,880 --> 00:48:30,799
Speaker 1: But I also realized when I was younger, I was

831
00:48:30,840 --> 00:48:33,680
Speaker 1: pretty resilient. You know, I could wake up the next

832
00:48:33,680 --> 00:48:37,440
Speaker 1: morning and go to work after drinking all night, and maybe,

833
00:48:38,080 --> 00:48:42,239
Speaker 1: just maybe that lifestyle kind of contributed to my heart

834
00:48:42,280 --> 00:48:47,240
Speaker 1: issue because I still today can't pinpoint exactly what happened

835
00:48:47,239 --> 00:48:52,720
Speaker 1: to me. Doctors can't define that. It's it's mind boggling

836
00:48:52,760 --> 00:48:55,760
Speaker 1: to me that we have such an amazing medical system,

837
00:48:55,880 --> 00:48:58,279
Speaker 1: but they can't tell you what the cause of it is,

838
00:48:58,760 --> 00:49:03,560
Speaker 1: you know. So now I'm back to living my normal life,

839
00:49:03,920 --> 00:49:10,200
Speaker 1: but I've also taken it in a more conservative way.

840
00:49:10,239 --> 00:49:12,839
Speaker 1: I'm not doing any high intense interval training. I'm not,

841
00:49:13,040 --> 00:49:15,080
Speaker 1: you know, taking pre workouts. I stopped that a long

842
00:49:15,120 --> 00:49:18,359
Speaker 1: time ago. Anyways, I'm real conscious about what I eat.

843
00:49:18,520 --> 00:49:21,280
Speaker 1: I stay away from alcohol. I might have a drink

844
00:49:21,400 --> 00:49:23,960
Speaker 1: once or twice a year, but even that I don't

845
00:49:24,000 --> 00:49:25,880
Speaker 1: want to do because I know it's poison.

846
00:49:26,800 --> 00:49:27,000
Speaker 2: You know.

847
00:49:27,120 --> 00:49:32,239
Speaker 1: I'm doing everything I can to avoid potentially prevent that

848
00:49:32,280 --> 00:49:35,319
Speaker 1: from ever happening again. Because after my surgery, and after

849
00:49:35,480 --> 00:49:38,239
Speaker 1: the doctor said you're good, you get the Green bill

850
00:49:38,280 --> 00:49:41,040
Speaker 1: of health. You're also you're back to normal, he said,

851
00:49:41,080 --> 00:49:43,279
Speaker 1: but there's that one percent chance it'll come back when

852
00:49:43,360 --> 00:49:46,799
Speaker 1: you're in your eighties, right, And I'm thinking, okay, well

853
00:49:46,840 --> 00:49:50,680
Speaker 1: maybe by then I won't care. But ultimately, I don't

854
00:49:50,680 --> 00:49:55,160
Speaker 1: want to ever live the life of an elderly you know,

855
00:49:55,239 --> 00:49:58,680
Speaker 1: in my eighties nineties, I'm hoping to live that long,

856
00:50:00,320 --> 00:50:02,800
Speaker 1: but I don't want to live my life on pharmaceuticals.

857
00:50:02,840 --> 00:50:05,840
Speaker 1: I don't want to have to rely on pills to

858
00:50:05,960 --> 00:50:09,160
Speaker 1: keep me alive, or keep me active or you know,

859
00:50:09,600 --> 00:50:12,839
Speaker 1: keep me thinking clear. So I'm doing everything and I've

860
00:50:12,880 --> 00:50:16,280
Speaker 1: always have because of that. You know, I've always exercised regularly,

861
00:50:16,320 --> 00:50:19,440
Speaker 1: I've always eaten regularly. And then this happens to my

862
00:50:19,560 --> 00:50:22,400
Speaker 1: heart and it just spun my head.

863
00:50:22,520 --> 00:50:22,799
Speaker 2: You know.

864
00:50:23,120 --> 00:50:24,960
Speaker 1: Thank God for my wife that was there to help

865
00:50:25,000 --> 00:50:28,160
Speaker 1: me get through this, and I feel like gotten through this,

866
00:50:28,280 --> 00:50:30,840
Speaker 1: I feel I still have obviously a little trauma that

867
00:50:31,000 --> 00:50:33,359
Speaker 1: deep down in the back of my head, like don't

868
00:50:33,360 --> 00:50:33,839
Speaker 1: go too hard.

869
00:50:35,360 --> 00:50:38,080
Speaker 2: So did you did the doctor tell you not to

870
00:50:38,160 --> 00:50:40,440
Speaker 2: do high intensity workouts or was that your decision?

871
00:50:41,080 --> 00:50:46,680
Speaker 1: That was my decision, you know. When it happened, no

872
00:50:46,760 --> 00:50:49,120
Speaker 1: matter what I did physically, if I went for a run,

873
00:50:49,239 --> 00:50:51,719
Speaker 1: or if I got on my bike, or hell if

874
00:50:51,760 --> 00:50:55,319
Speaker 1: I just walked up some steep stairs, my heart rate

875
00:50:55,320 --> 00:50:58,000
Speaker 1: would go into two one hundred and twenty beats for

876
00:50:58,040 --> 00:51:00,560
Speaker 1: a minute, and it felt like I was caring like

877
00:51:01,000 --> 00:51:03,759
Speaker 1: three hundred pounds on me and I couldn't take a

878
00:51:03,800 --> 00:51:07,760
Speaker 1: step without running out of breath and it was the worst,

879
00:51:07,800 --> 00:51:11,919
Speaker 1: the worst feeling I've ever had. And granted I've been

880
00:51:11,960 --> 00:51:14,399
Speaker 1: in those situations when I was doing Spartan, I would put,

881
00:51:14,440 --> 00:51:16,680
Speaker 1: you know, an eighty pound bucket full of rocks on

882
00:51:16,719 --> 00:51:19,680
Speaker 1: my shoulders and climb a you know, a steep road,

883
00:51:19,760 --> 00:51:24,680
Speaker 1: dirt road that was intentional. But when it's not intentional,

884
00:51:24,760 --> 00:51:26,880
Speaker 1: you don't have a bucket on your shoulders, but just

885
00:51:26,920 --> 00:51:31,080
Speaker 1: your own body weight. Yeah, it really just hurts, hurts

886
00:51:31,080 --> 00:51:35,240
Speaker 1: your ego, hurts your your positive, you know train of thoughts.

887
00:51:35,239 --> 00:51:39,279
Speaker 1: It hurts your strength, and you think, well, what's the

888
00:51:39,360 --> 00:51:45,000
Speaker 1: point now? You know what? I honestly experienced a short

889
00:51:45,080 --> 00:51:50,560
Speaker 1: bout of depression, and the biggest outcome from that was

890
00:51:51,400 --> 00:51:55,960
Speaker 1: growing up you know, being you know, so motivated, so positive,

891
00:51:56,040 --> 00:52:00,000
Speaker 1: and so I would say strong, I would I would

892
00:52:00,080 --> 00:52:03,200
Speaker 1: hear people say I'm depressed, and I what you have

893
00:52:03,320 --> 00:52:05,279
Speaker 1: to be depressed? We live in a beautiful country. We

894
00:52:05,360 --> 00:52:07,080
Speaker 1: live you know, there's a lot of freedom, there's a

895
00:52:07,120 --> 00:52:08,839
Speaker 1: lot of sun, there's a lot of good food, there's

896
00:52:08,840 --> 00:52:11,719
Speaker 1: a lot of things you can do. So you're not depressed.

897
00:52:11,719 --> 00:52:15,200
Speaker 1: Why are you depressed? And it made me realize that

898
00:52:15,239 --> 00:52:18,120
Speaker 1: depression is a real thing and if you let it

899
00:52:18,200 --> 00:52:22,800
Speaker 1: spiral you down. I never thought I would ever experience

900
00:52:22,800 --> 00:52:25,960
Speaker 1: something like that, but it it experience that helped me

901
00:52:26,000 --> 00:52:28,240
Speaker 1: open up my eyes. So when I do meet somebody

902
00:52:28,680 --> 00:52:32,879
Speaker 1: that is going through depression, I can better understand them

903
00:52:33,239 --> 00:52:37,120
Speaker 1: and better, you know, better understand them so I can

904
00:52:37,160 --> 00:52:39,960
Speaker 1: say the right thing versus suck it up, you know,

905
00:52:40,480 --> 00:52:45,160
Speaker 1: get out there and live your life right, versus well, let's,

906
00:52:45,239 --> 00:52:46,759
Speaker 1: you know, put one foot in front of the other.

907
00:52:46,840 --> 00:52:50,399
Speaker 1: Let's try to keep moving. Let's, you know, get some sun,

908
00:52:50,480 --> 00:52:54,080
Speaker 1: let's go outside, and you know, let's let's just do

909
00:52:54,160 --> 00:52:59,200
Speaker 1: something about it. But sitting back in a couch drinking

910
00:52:59,560 --> 00:53:02,839
Speaker 1: or eating ice cream or you know, drinking alcohol or

911
00:53:03,440 --> 00:53:07,960
Speaker 1: whatever it is that people kind of circcumb to definitely

912
00:53:08,000 --> 00:53:11,359
Speaker 1: is the wrong path. But yeah, it was. It was

913
00:53:12,239 --> 00:53:15,960
Speaker 1: the biggest scare in my life health wise, and all

914
00:53:16,000 --> 00:53:18,000
Speaker 1: I could think of is I got to learn as

915
00:53:18,080 --> 00:53:22,719
Speaker 1: much as I can to beat this, because I can't

916
00:53:22,760 --> 00:53:26,040
Speaker 1: rely on a doctor or a healthcare system to get

917
00:53:26,080 --> 00:53:28,440
Speaker 1: me through this. I have to do whatever I can

918
00:53:28,520 --> 00:53:31,680
Speaker 1: on my own. And when I find the right doctor

919
00:53:31,719 --> 00:53:35,080
Speaker 1: that I trust and believe based on my knowledge, now

920
00:53:36,000 --> 00:53:38,719
Speaker 1: I will make a better decision about my health versus

921
00:53:39,360 --> 00:53:42,360
Speaker 1: just sitting back, closing your eyes and saying, doc, do

922
00:53:42,480 --> 00:53:45,560
Speaker 1: whatever you know, take you take care of my health. Right.

923
00:53:45,840 --> 00:53:48,200
Speaker 1: That doesn't work. That doesn't always work.

924
00:53:48,840 --> 00:53:54,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, so no, I agree, And yeah I think I

925
00:53:54,160 --> 00:53:56,640
Speaker 2: think for me, that would be probably the toughest thing

926
00:53:57,000 --> 00:54:00,399
Speaker 2: that could the inability to just not be all work

927
00:54:00,440 --> 00:54:01,879
Speaker 2: out again. I don't even know how I would deal

928
00:54:01,920 --> 00:54:05,960
Speaker 2: with that, because a big part of my sanity is

929
00:54:06,239 --> 00:54:10,280
Speaker 2: working out, right, That's been like my pill to relax

930
00:54:10,680 --> 00:54:13,080
Speaker 2: is the working out. And then it doesn't matter what

931
00:54:13,239 --> 00:54:16,399
Speaker 2: comes my way because I'm so relaxed, I can take

932
00:54:16,440 --> 00:54:20,359
Speaker 2: on whenever it comes my way. So you not being

933
00:54:20,360 --> 00:54:23,520
Speaker 2: able to do what you'd loved to do for ever

934
00:54:23,680 --> 00:54:26,319
Speaker 2: since you were young. I could easily see how you

935
00:54:26,320 --> 00:54:29,440
Speaker 2: can get depressed over that. So major props for you

936
00:54:29,600 --> 00:54:33,239
Speaker 2: beating that, because that that I know wasn't easy, you know,

937
00:54:34,400 --> 00:54:37,240
Speaker 2: especially you know we talk about validation, like, I'm sure

938
00:54:38,000 --> 00:54:40,160
Speaker 2: a part of your validation I know for me has

939
00:54:40,200 --> 00:54:44,560
Speaker 2: been I've always been fit, you know, and then that

940
00:54:44,600 --> 00:54:49,640
Speaker 2: gets taken away. It's like, oh, shoot, you know, that's tough.

941
00:54:49,680 --> 00:54:50,480
Speaker 2: It's not easy to do.

942
00:54:51,000 --> 00:54:54,440
Speaker 1: I'll tell you. There was this one eye opening example

943
00:54:55,600 --> 00:54:57,960
Speaker 1: that happened to me right in the middle of my

944
00:54:58,400 --> 00:55:00,360
Speaker 1: of the year that I was having this hard issue.

945
00:55:00,400 --> 00:55:03,680
Speaker 1: I was doing Spartan training prior to that, you know,

946
00:55:03,760 --> 00:55:08,160
Speaker 1: I made it very big effort to be in the

947
00:55:08,200 --> 00:55:10,319
Speaker 1: best shape of my life so I can lead my

948
00:55:10,600 --> 00:55:11,919
Speaker 1: Spartans through the race.

949
00:55:12,040 --> 00:55:12,239
Speaker 2: Right.

950
00:55:13,280 --> 00:55:16,960
Speaker 1: And there was a particular race I really enjoyed taking

951
00:55:16,960 --> 00:55:21,239
Speaker 1: my team too, and that was money. And every year

952
00:55:21,280 --> 00:55:23,600
Speaker 1: we'd go out there and I'd you know, I'd lead

953
00:55:23,640 --> 00:55:26,319
Speaker 1: the group and stay at the front and then go

954
00:55:26,440 --> 00:55:29,399
Speaker 1: back and you know, help motivate people and then run

955
00:55:29,440 --> 00:55:33,400
Speaker 1: to the front. I was basically in phenomenal shape and

956
00:55:33,520 --> 00:55:36,440
Speaker 1: this one race, I said, I'm going to go. I

957
00:55:36,560 --> 00:55:39,880
Speaker 1: have to go, because that was my mentality is it's

958
00:55:39,960 --> 00:55:43,000
Speaker 1: kind of like what Teddy is doing with riding horses,

959
00:55:43,200 --> 00:55:45,719
Speaker 1: you know, going through this, right, I totally understand that

960
00:55:45,800 --> 00:55:48,799
Speaker 1: I have to I have to continue trying to be

961
00:55:48,840 --> 00:55:51,759
Speaker 1: as normal as possible. Plus I signed up for this race, right,

962
00:55:51,840 --> 00:55:55,759
Speaker 1: So we went out there Monterey started the race. I was,

963
00:55:55,920 --> 00:55:59,000
Speaker 1: you know, a little ambivalent about it, but I did it.

964
00:55:59,239 --> 00:56:02,239
Speaker 1: And halfway through the race, it just I went into

965
00:56:02,239 --> 00:56:06,160
Speaker 1: a I started feeling kind of dizzy. I would go

966
00:56:06,280 --> 00:56:09,240
Speaker 1: up a little hill and I would have to stop

967
00:56:09,280 --> 00:56:11,279
Speaker 1: at the top, put my hands on my knees and

968
00:56:11,440 --> 00:56:14,040
Speaker 1: catch my breath. And then I look up. I'm like,

969
00:56:15,120 --> 00:56:18,480
Speaker 1: I'm the one that's holding back our team. I'm the

970
00:56:18,480 --> 00:56:22,319
Speaker 1: one that's slowing everybody down, and I'm supposed to be

971
00:56:22,440 --> 00:56:27,800
Speaker 1: the leader here. And I felt so bad about myself

972
00:56:27,840 --> 00:56:30,400
Speaker 1: at that moment. But I had a couple of people

973
00:56:30,400 --> 00:56:32,400
Speaker 1: come up to me and say, don't worry. You know,

974
00:56:32,480 --> 00:56:35,200
Speaker 1: we still love you, we still think you're amazing, but

975
00:56:35,320 --> 00:56:38,680
Speaker 1: what you're going through is not easy. We're here for you,

976
00:56:38,880 --> 00:56:40,960
Speaker 1: and they would stop there with me, they would walk

977
00:56:41,000 --> 00:56:43,080
Speaker 1: with me when I needed to walk. Then we got

978
00:56:43,120 --> 00:56:45,759
Speaker 1: through the race together and at the end, you know,

979
00:56:45,800 --> 00:56:49,719
Speaker 1: we're all in tears, like, oh, I've we made it.

980
00:56:48,200 --> 00:56:48,440
Speaker 2: It was.

981
00:56:50,000 --> 00:56:54,640
Speaker 1: Sort of a survival thing, right, But that moment, in

982
00:56:54,680 --> 00:56:56,879
Speaker 1: that moment where I just looked up, I'm like, I'm

983
00:56:56,880 --> 00:57:00,000
Speaker 1: holding everybody back here and I'm supposed to be the leader.

984
00:57:00,400 --> 00:57:03,400
Speaker 1: It hit me hard. It hit me really hard. And

985
00:57:04,200 --> 00:57:06,680
Speaker 1: like we talked earlier, I turned that around. I said

986
00:57:06,719 --> 00:57:09,200
Speaker 1: I got to do something about this. I cannot let

987
00:57:09,200 --> 00:57:14,160
Speaker 1: this beat me. I cannot. I cannot And even though

988
00:57:14,160 --> 00:57:16,480
Speaker 1: that was one of the hardest races I've ever done.

989
00:57:17,960 --> 00:57:20,240
Speaker 1: I came out of it thinking, Okay, I'm going to

990
00:57:20,320 --> 00:57:22,640
Speaker 1: do this. I'm gonna do whatever it takes to beat

991
00:57:23,120 --> 00:57:29,600
Speaker 1: this disease. So hopefully Teddy sees that the same experience,

992
00:57:29,680 --> 00:57:32,600
Speaker 1: you know, pushing through you know, the pain and pushing

993
00:57:32,680 --> 00:57:36,360
Speaker 1: through the challenges, and maybe she'll have a moment where

994
00:57:36,400 --> 00:57:39,400
Speaker 1: she just sees clarity and says, I'm gonna grab the

995
00:57:39,480 --> 00:57:42,480
Speaker 1: bull by the horns if she hasn't already, and just

996
00:57:42,800 --> 00:57:46,520
Speaker 1: take charge of this because I can't rely on anybody

997
00:57:47,600 --> 00:57:50,080
Speaker 1: to fix me. I have to fix myself. You know,

998
00:57:50,200 --> 00:57:52,880
Speaker 1: you need help, but you still have to take charge

999
00:57:52,880 --> 00:57:53,600
Speaker 1: of your own health.

1000
00:57:55,600 --> 00:57:58,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think she's doing that. And you bring a

1001
00:57:58,120 --> 00:58:01,960
Speaker 2: good point, right, which is I think pain is inevitable

1002
00:58:02,200 --> 00:58:05,600
Speaker 2: and suffering is optional. Right. I think you suffer when

1003
00:58:05,600 --> 00:58:09,040
Speaker 2: you just sit around lament on why is this happening

1004
00:58:09,120 --> 00:58:12,560
Speaker 2: to me? And I feel so sorry for myself versus

1005
00:58:12,600 --> 00:58:14,960
Speaker 2: just like, hey, it happened, and now I just got

1006
00:58:15,000 --> 00:58:18,000
Speaker 2: to push forward. Right, And that's the difference I think

1007
00:58:18,040 --> 00:58:22,600
Speaker 2: between pain and suffering, because again, the pain is inevitable,

1008
00:58:22,640 --> 00:58:26,680
Speaker 2: and I think she's doing just that. What I've noticed

1009
00:58:26,720 --> 00:58:30,440
Speaker 2: about extraordinary people elade people versus average people is that

1010
00:58:31,120 --> 00:58:33,560
Speaker 2: we all get hurt, right, we all have to go

1011
00:58:33,640 --> 00:58:36,880
Speaker 2: through pain. But it's your ability to bounce back and

1012
00:58:36,920 --> 00:58:41,120
Speaker 2: how quick you can bounce back, right, Because everyone's going

1013
00:58:41,200 --> 00:58:43,680
Speaker 2: to get knocked down in life. That's inevitable. You're going

1014
00:58:43,760 --> 00:58:46,000
Speaker 2: to get punched in the face and you're going to

1015
00:58:46,040 --> 00:58:49,400
Speaker 2: get dropped. But it's how quickly you can get back

1016
00:58:49,480 --> 00:58:52,480
Speaker 2: up and continue to push forward, focusing on the things

1017
00:58:52,480 --> 00:58:55,800
Speaker 2: that you can control that make the difference. If you

1018
00:58:55,920 --> 00:58:59,120
Speaker 2: look at unfortunately, most people, when life punches them in

1019
00:58:59,160 --> 00:59:02,520
Speaker 2: the face and knocks them down, they take days, they

1020
00:59:02,520 --> 00:59:07,480
Speaker 2: take weeks, they take months too years to finally come back.

1021
00:59:08,200 --> 00:59:12,240
Speaker 2: Now you figure in a ten year time limit, like

1022
00:59:12,320 --> 00:59:17,880
Speaker 2: you're probably gonna get knocked down a large probably four

1023
00:59:18,000 --> 00:59:21,040
Speaker 2: or five times, right, some might even be twenty times

1024
00:59:21,080 --> 00:59:24,520
Speaker 2: in a ten year period. Right. And if you think

1025
00:59:24,560 --> 00:59:28,040
Speaker 2: about if you compare it to somebody who immediately springs

1026
00:59:28,080 --> 00:59:31,680
Speaker 2: back up and starts attacking, right, versus the person that

1027
00:59:32,600 --> 00:59:36,520
Speaker 2: just stays in the ground, stays on the floor for months, weeks,

1028
00:59:36,640 --> 00:59:42,400
Speaker 2: stays whatever years. That starts to compound over time. And

1029
00:59:42,480 --> 00:59:44,560
Speaker 2: what I've realized in life is that if you just

1030
00:59:44,640 --> 00:59:46,960
Speaker 2: learn how to play hurt and just show up the

1031
00:59:47,000 --> 00:59:49,240
Speaker 2: next day even though you don't feel like it because

1032
00:59:49,280 --> 00:59:51,080
Speaker 2: the day before you just got your ass kicked and

1033
00:59:51,200 --> 00:59:54,560
Speaker 2: some bad news. You continue to do that. You don't

1034
00:59:54,640 --> 00:59:56,560
Speaker 2: have to be the smartest person in the world. You

1035
00:59:56,680 --> 01:00:01,280
Speaker 2: just continue to show up every day how you feel,

1036
01:00:01,560 --> 01:00:03,400
Speaker 2: and you do the things that you're supposed to do.

1037
01:00:03,440 --> 01:00:05,840
Speaker 2: No matter how you feel, you're going to be pretty

1038
01:00:05,840 --> 01:00:08,520
Speaker 2: successful and you're going to do pretty well for yourself.

1039
01:00:08,560 --> 01:00:12,560
Speaker 2: But most people can't do that. As easy as that sounds,

1040
01:00:13,200 --> 01:00:16,640
Speaker 2: most people can't play hurt. The minute something goes wrong

1041
01:00:16,680 --> 01:00:22,440
Speaker 2: in their life. It's freaking days, weeks, months, years, and

1042
01:00:22,480 --> 01:00:26,360
Speaker 2: then when they finally recover, a year's pass them by again.

1043
01:00:26,600 --> 01:00:30,840
Speaker 2: You compound that over time, that other person that maybe

1044
01:00:30,920 --> 01:00:33,400
Speaker 2: wasn't as smart as you, wasn't as smart as you,

1045
01:00:33,520 --> 01:00:34,560
Speaker 2: is way ahead.

1046
01:00:34,360 --> 01:00:41,000
Speaker 1: Of Yeah, I think in one word is it's endurance.

1047
01:00:41,320 --> 01:00:43,680
Speaker 1: You know, having the ability to give back up and

1048
01:00:44,000 --> 01:00:46,720
Speaker 1: endure whatever it is you have to do to get

1049
01:00:46,760 --> 01:00:50,600
Speaker 1: to the other side. And sometimes it'll take you a

1050
01:00:50,760 --> 01:00:53,439
Speaker 1: day to get past it. Sometimes it'll take you ten

1051
01:00:53,520 --> 01:00:57,560
Speaker 1: years to really realize every single step I took for

1052
01:00:57,560 --> 01:01:00,120
Speaker 1: the last ten years got me to where I am today,

1053
01:01:00,280 --> 01:01:03,520
Speaker 1: and I made it, you know.

1054
01:01:03,560 --> 01:01:11,040
Speaker 2: So exactly. My favorite chapter in the Bible is the Proverbs,

1055
01:01:11,080 --> 01:01:12,640
Speaker 2: And even if you're not a person of faith, if

1056
01:01:12,680 --> 01:01:16,320
Speaker 2: you just go into Proverbs, it's just all about wisdom, right.

1057
01:01:17,000 --> 01:01:20,360
Speaker 2: And one of my favorite proverbs is Proverbs twenty four

1058
01:01:20,520 --> 01:01:25,520
Speaker 2: sixteen that says, though the righteous falls seven times, they

1059
01:01:25,560 --> 01:01:31,680
Speaker 2: will rise again, but the wicket will crumble when calamity strikes.

1060
01:01:32,480 --> 01:01:37,840
Speaker 2: Now that word seven, right, though the righteous will fall

1061
01:01:37,920 --> 01:01:42,320
Speaker 2: seven times seven stands for infinity. That means you're gonna fall,

1062
01:01:42,440 --> 01:01:45,160
Speaker 2: and you're gonna fall, and you're gonna fall. And I

1063
01:01:45,240 --> 01:01:47,120
Speaker 2: used to think, man, if I just become a person

1064
01:01:47,160 --> 01:01:50,800
Speaker 2: of faith, I won't have to go through pain. And

1065
01:01:50,960 --> 01:01:53,800
Speaker 2: what I realized, especially as I saw that proverb, was like, no,

1066
01:01:53,840 --> 01:01:56,280
Speaker 2: you have to. Everybody's got to go through it. And

1067
01:01:56,320 --> 01:02:00,320
Speaker 2: all you have to do is rise up one more time,

1068
01:02:01,720 --> 01:02:04,360
Speaker 2: you know, Yeah, And that's life. You's got to keep rising.

1069
01:02:04,400 --> 01:02:06,640
Speaker 2: You got to rise up one more time when life

1070
01:02:06,640 --> 01:02:08,600
Speaker 2: punches in the face, get up again, do it again.

1071
01:02:09,080 --> 01:02:10,680
Speaker 1: Well on that note, I love it.

1072
01:02:10,800 --> 01:02:12,200
Speaker 2: I love it. Yeah.

1073
01:02:12,520 --> 01:02:16,120
Speaker 1: I think we're gonna close this out and say a

1074
01:02:16,120 --> 01:02:17,200
Speaker 1: prayer for you you.

1075
01:02:17,160 --> 01:02:22,720
Speaker 2: Know, appreciate it. Yeah, appreciate all prayers. Appreciate everybody that's

1076
01:02:22,920 --> 01:02:24,919
Speaker 2: you know, been praying force to get a lot of those.

1077
01:02:25,040 --> 01:02:30,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, you can truly appreciate all your guys' support as

1078
01:02:30,240 --> 01:02:36,680
Speaker 1: well through his Instagram, through you know, your reviews. You know,

1079
01:02:36,720 --> 01:02:39,080
Speaker 1: this has been a tough one. But we're going to

1080
01:02:39,120 --> 01:02:39,960
Speaker 1: get through this, bro.

1081
01:02:41,880 --> 01:02:44,000
Speaker 2: Yep, So no, we will. We're confident.

1082
01:02:44,120 --> 01:02:47,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, welcome back, and I'm happy to see you.

1083
01:02:47,320 --> 01:02:48,240
Speaker 2: It's good to be back.

1084
01:02:48,480 --> 01:02:50,520
Speaker 1: And we'll see you on the next podcast.

1085
01:02:52,320 --> 01:02:53,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm excited for that one. We have a good

1086
01:02:53,840 --> 01:02:54,439
Speaker 2: one for sure.

1087
01:02:54,960 --> 01:02:56,600
Speaker 1: All Right, guys, have a wonderful day.

1088
01:02:57,200 --> 01:02:58,200
Speaker 2: All right, I'll talk to you soon.

1089
01:02:58,240 --> 01:02:58,919
Speaker 1: See guys later.

1090
01:03:00,600 --> 01:03:02,600
Speaker 2: And the never penet