Speaker 1: Whenever you're ready and done playing with your phone. I'm here,
Speaker 1: ready to go, Andrew. I don't know whose text is
Speaker 1: more important than this podcast, Scott.
Speaker 2: I have a job outside of this podcast, so I
Speaker 2: just thought I would like that, are we fighting on
Speaker 2: this podcast? I think we might listen. I will pull
Speaker 2: a reality show TV moment and walk away.
Speaker 1: There's plenty of other people who are ready to step
Speaker 1: right in.
Speaker 2: I just feel like my needs aren't being met. Scott.
Speaker 1: Okay, that's enough of that, so welcome to and Shorter
Speaker 1: every time. Well, it is Serial Killers podcast time. I
Speaker 1: don't even know what episode we're up to it. We
Speaker 1: don't care anymore. Right, we're in the high twenties.
Speaker 2: I'm just gonna say it's episode forty million.
Speaker 1: Didn't you just say stop doing that?
Speaker 2: Yeah, so it's episode forty million in one.
Speaker 1: All right, we're we're in the twenty eight or something
Speaker 1: like that. But who cares. We're here and we're gonna
Speaker 1: eat some cereal because that's what we do in this podcast.
Speaker 1: Just in case you're new, you know, we will try
Speaker 1: one classic cereal and one new cereal, and generally a
Speaker 1: bonus box because Andrew's always hungry, right.
Speaker 2: No, that's not it. It's always you. I just didn't
Speaker 2: hear along for the ride. Okay, really loving my life,
Speaker 2: spiritual journey man.
Speaker 1: All right, if that's how you want to put it.
Speaker 1: So let's uh, shall I go down into the cereal sack?
Speaker 2: Of course? What are we doing first class?
Speaker 1: I think that we should do a classic cereal first.
Speaker 1: So I'm gonna head downtown as they.
Speaker 2: Say, oh god, no one says that.
Speaker 1: Now, this is a very classic Okay. You may remember
Speaker 1: the commercials from the seventies.
Speaker 2: And this is the part of the podcast where if
Speaker 2: new listeners, I go, I wasn't born.
Speaker 1: Oh that's right, Andrew, because you're only like twenty something
Speaker 1: eight that's the number of this episode. Congratulations.
Speaker 2: Oh so you knew the whole time and you were
Speaker 2: just keeping that a secret.
Speaker 1: I did, of course. All right, So we're going to
Speaker 1: dive into a box of our original Quaker Oh Life,
Speaker 1: it's one of my favorites Life.
Speaker 2: Cereal Love Life. Do you well, I mean like actual
Speaker 2: life or the Cereal?
Speaker 3: Because which one do you like better?
Speaker 2: But do you have a couch?
Speaker 3: Yes?
Speaker 1: Sit on down? All right. Well I went with this
Speaker 1: one first because I know it's going to be bland
Speaker 1: and boring.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's not bland and it's not boring. Don't
Speaker 2: say that about my cereal.
Speaker 1: Let me see what the second ingredient is. What do
Speaker 1: you think sugar? Mm yep, yeah, whole grain oat flour sugar.
Speaker 2: Listen, it's one of my favorites. But I know it's
Speaker 2: not like super healthy like the Tram played off.
Speaker 1: I mean it's not very well those commercials back in
Speaker 1: the day, Yeah, with Mikey in them. They tried to
Speaker 1: play it off as a healthy commercial. Mike, it doesn't
Speaker 1: like healthy stuff, you know, And then they gave it
Speaker 1: to him and he liked it. So I guess shape
Speaker 1: wise I could most equate these two.
Speaker 2: Checks Yeah, or Crispecks even Life is one of the
Speaker 2: only cereals I can eat dry?
Speaker 3: Really Yeah?
Speaker 1: How about Checks?
Speaker 3: You like checks mix?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Well I don't consider that a cereal. Hold on, okay,
Speaker 2: I need to tell you what's going on. No, no,
Speaker 2: don't no, I am So. Scott has recently taken upon
Speaker 2: himself to say we need more sound fix.
Speaker 1: Well, it's actually my wife that said we needed to
Speaker 1: sound like it's actually going into a bowl.
Speaker 2: To which then Max got a delivery who's Max, Max,
Speaker 2: Elvis's dog got it delivered Elvis the radio show that
Speaker 2: we work for, Elvis Duran in the morning show. His
Speaker 2: dog Max got a dog bowl. Yes, so Scott is
Speaker 2: now pouring the cereal into a dog bowl. So this way,
Speaker 2: you guys get the sound effect of the cereal hitting
Speaker 2: a glass bowl.
Speaker 1: Well, yeah, that's the way it's cereal is supposed to sound,
Speaker 1: not like this, that's a cup. But we'll just keep
Speaker 1: using cups because you know what, I don't have to
Speaker 1: clean a bowl every time.
Speaker 2: It's annoying unless we get like official Serial Killers bowls.
Speaker 1: Yeah, or if we could get Whirlpool to donate a dishwasher.
Speaker 2: You went from like zero to sixty on the endorsements.
Speaker 2: We're trying to get milk and you're like, I know
Speaker 2: it's better than milk a dishwasher.
Speaker 1: Hell, we also have no water hookup or any drainage
Speaker 1: or anything, so I guess that probably wouldn't work.
Speaker 2: Oh soo, hell, like what, I'm so confused.
Speaker 1: I don't know what's going on. To go to the
Speaker 1: refrigerator and unfortunately, I'm sorry, but we're back to fat
Speaker 1: free skim milk this time around. Tuscan Dairy Pure is
Speaker 1: the brand.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Uh, the seven to eleven did not have any one
Speaker 1: percent this morning.
Speaker 2: Do you think they get it from Tuscany?
Speaker 1: No, I don't because no, No, that's Italy.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so that's a pretty far trip.
Speaker 2: So these cows ethically raised.
Speaker 1: You know what, here's your freaking life. Maybe you should
Speaker 1: get on.
Speaker 2: Okay, so let's eat the cereal.
Speaker 1: You know what, this kind of sinks. Actually, this this
Speaker 1: cereal doesn't flow.
Speaker 3: Cause it's holy four bowl of warm boom so fast.
Speaker 1: You can do that.
Speaker 3: Mm.
Speaker 2: I like what I like.
Speaker 1: I tell you why. I like the Life secret sugar
Speaker 1: that's right in the middle, little granules and you can
Speaker 1: taste them and feel them. That's why I really like
Speaker 1: the Cinnamon Life. I love Cinnamon Life because you could
Speaker 1: you could what you can crunch the cinnamon sugar in
Speaker 1: the middle.
Speaker 2: Like going into extreme detail. You can taste that's right.
Speaker 1: So four balls, one spoon from you, Yes, that means
Speaker 1: you like it?
Speaker 3: Yeah right, Hey, this.
Speaker 2: Will be Andrew's final moments on Serial Killers. But that's
Speaker 2: I feel like we're crazy on this episode right now.
Speaker 1: Really yeah, well, I also like it. I got them
Speaker 1: bleeding from the Life cereal. Look at this. Oh my goodness,
Speaker 1: where am I bleeding from? Isn't that where you shoot
Speaker 1: your heroin?
Speaker 3: What?
Speaker 1: I give it three balls in a spoon because I
Speaker 1: also like it.
Speaker 2: And if anyone's doing heroin, it's you, bro.
Speaker 1: I won't ever play that again, I promise. So are
Speaker 1: you okay?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 2: I mean I think so what.
Speaker 1: You cut yourself on?
Speaker 2: I guess I scratched my leg?
Speaker 1: I mean, is there a lawsuit here? Did you cut
Speaker 1: it on the sea? Yes? I'm in distress. Is there
Speaker 1: a shard of wheat? Let's move on to the new Cereal?
Speaker 1: How about that?
Speaker 2: Okay?
Speaker 1: You ready?
Speaker 2: Is it another version of life? Because I don't know
Speaker 2: if I can do this?
Speaker 1: It is not. But I do have vanilla and cinnamon,
Speaker 1: and I think I have a box of strawberry also
Speaker 1: in the not in the cereal sack, but in the
Speaker 1: cereal basement pantry. So maybe maybe next week? All right,
Speaker 1: So let's get down to the cereal sack. I'm pulling out.
Speaker 2: Can you pull up your pants? Because I can see
Speaker 2: your butt crack.
Speaker 1: I have to do some plumbing later. Wild Berry fruit
Speaker 1: loops from Kellogg's what's that face for? They're probably not
Speaker 1: much different than berry berry kicks or oops All Berries. Yeah,
Speaker 1: they're probably closer to oops all Berries.
Speaker 2: I'm not like jazzed about it, you know, because it's
Speaker 2: called berry. No, it just doesn't seem like something I'm
Speaker 2: gonna with stars. Okay, look how.
Speaker 1: Happy two can is to be presenting the stars.
Speaker 2: I really love that they made two can out of felt.
Speaker 1: He does look like he's not really a cartoon here,
Speaker 1: although his feet are, but the rest of his body
Speaker 1: is not.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's very odd, like why does he have him
Speaker 2: a reflection again? And in photoshop? That is like you
Speaker 2: don't understand all somebody did like the designer because this
Speaker 2: is the laziest box art I've ever seen him ony
Speaker 2: not the back No, the back of the box art
Speaker 2: is like a little too much.
Speaker 1: Wow, that's a whole amusement park back then.
Speaker 2: Yeah, the front of the box is literally just too
Speaker 2: can Sam. They copied and pasted him onto a box
Speaker 2: and then somebody pressed the reflect button.
Speaker 1: He just created that.
Speaker 3: And they were like done.
Speaker 1: Well, my guess is this is probably a rather limited cereal.
Speaker 1: Wild berry fruit loops is not gonna I don't think
Speaker 1: last long.
Speaker 2: Why you've already had fruit loops with flavors. Why are
Speaker 2: you creating wild berry?
Speaker 1: There's so many varieties of fruit loops. Now there's one
Speaker 1: with marshmallows too. I'm gonna have to get that.
Speaker 2: Didn't we try that already?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 1: We did try that.
Speaker 2: H It kind of smells like a sugary drink.
Speaker 1: Alow, everything we eat is a sugary drink. So we've
Speaker 1: got red, blue and green rings and purple stars.
Speaker 2: This is this is a lot. I'm really jumping into this.
Speaker 1: One smells berry delicious.
Speaker 2: Why do you do this?
Speaker 1: I'm trying to get people to tune out.
Speaker 2: Here you go, Okay, here we go. Make sure I
Speaker 2: get one of these star shapes. No, no, no, no,
Speaker 2: just being honest.
Speaker 1: Now, well, what makes you say no devoid.
Speaker 2: Of any flavor?
Speaker 1: I have to kind of agree there.
Speaker 2: Well, how can you go with something exotic like wild
Speaker 2: berry but have it tastes like not wild berry? Also?
Speaker 2: Can I ask a question? Yeah, what technically is a
Speaker 2: wild berry?
Speaker 1: They're berries that grow in the wild. Could be raspberries
Speaker 1: or strawberries, or blackberries or boison berries.
Speaker 2: Wait, so like a raspberry is technically a wild berry?
Speaker 3: It is because they just grown that.
Speaker 2: I didn't know they had like that special classification.
Speaker 1: People plant them. But you could like drive a long
Speaker 1: on the side of an interstate and see raspberries like weeds. Yes,
Speaker 1: you better be careful because some of them are poisonous.
Speaker 2: Well, I don't normally stop on the interstate to go
Speaker 2: with raspberries.
Speaker 1: But I've been known to know I have been known to.
Speaker 2: The sad part is I actually believe that you are
Speaker 2: known to.
Speaker 1: You ever see those guys as you're driving. They're like
Speaker 1: pulled over on the side of the road with a
Speaker 1: basket picking wild flowers.
Speaker 2: Where do you live. I've seen it Amish country.
Speaker 1: No, I mean I've seen it on the interstate. People
Speaker 1: just pulled over picking those wild orange things.
Speaker 3: So here we go.
Speaker 1: This is the part of the show where we have
Speaker 1: to play.
Speaker 2: This Wait Serial Killers listener request. Okay, before the listener request,
Speaker 2: wait a second, I forgot to I didn't rate it either.
Speaker 1: I just stepped on a fruit on a loop.
Speaker 2: Are you sure it wasn't a star?
Speaker 1: No, it was a loop.
Speaker 3: That's right.
Speaker 1: We didn't rate this thing. Hold on, I gave it
Speaker 1: too to go back? No, okay, wild berry fruit loop
Speaker 1: from Kellogg's. You give it?
Speaker 2: What two bowls?
Speaker 1: I will give it two bowls in a spoon. Wasn't terrible,
Speaker 1: wasn't great? Kind of middle of the road because you know,
Speaker 1: if you take two balls and a spoon away from
Speaker 1: five balls, you get two balls and a spoon. So
Speaker 1: that's right in the middle.
Speaker 2: Wow, that's really cool, Scott, I do math?
Speaker 1: Are you drinking coffee? Is that your palate cleanser?
Speaker 2: It's tea, peppermint tea. Okay, all right, so I'm pretending
Speaker 2: like I'm a celebrity.
Speaker 1: Can I please play this thing now?
Speaker 2: Make it seem like it's always my fault? Here we go,
Speaker 2: serial killers listener request.
Speaker 1: It's the request from me again, the request is not
Speaker 1: from you, as a matter of fact, I don't think
Speaker 1: you're gonna like this at all.
Speaker 2: Who's it from?
Speaker 1: Well, it is from amongst other people, Laura on Twitter.
Speaker 3: Okay, wanted us to do this?
Speaker 2: Oh God, is it the one I think it's gonna be.
Speaker 1: I'm not sure what you think it's gonna be. It
Speaker 1: is another Kellogg's product.
Speaker 2: Is it a birthday cake? Cereal?
Speaker 1: And it is an offshoot of fruit Loops And I'm
Speaker 1: gonna go down to the cereal second well out another too?
Speaker 1: Can Sam creation Kellogg's fruit loop birthday cake, but it's
Speaker 1: his strawberry birthday cake, so you might be okay with it.
Speaker 1: What's matter? And again it's the freaking family size box
Speaker 1: because it's all they had. I want like seven loops,
Speaker 1: and I have to get an entire family size box.
Speaker 2: It's this is I'm hm, I just.
Speaker 1: It's a fun back of box. It's a whole birthday
Speaker 1: celebration in a park.
Speaker 2: So wait no, and I'll tell you why. The castle
Speaker 2: looks like why would you put a maze a pink
Speaker 2: maze there? It looks like intestines.
Speaker 1: It's in the it's in the it does look like
Speaker 1: a testine, it's in the frosting. And then there's a
Speaker 1: fruit loop bouncy house in the back there, and there's
Speaker 1: just loops everywhere. It's a search party find six party
Speaker 1: hats and six strawberries hidden around the park.
Speaker 2: All right, why can't you find them yourself?
Speaker 3: Too?
Speaker 2: Can sampton so lazy?
Speaker 1: Like find bird's eye of you? He should be able
Speaker 1: to see them.
Speaker 2: That's the third time I've let you make a joke
Speaker 2: that like I haven't said anything line it will be
Speaker 2: the last one.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, this stinks gross.
Speaker 2: Actually it's not the worst.
Speaker 3: I like strawberry quick.
Speaker 2: Yes, that's what I was thinking. So I'm not hating this.
Speaker 2: My problem with birthday cake, and I will say this
Speaker 2: people disagree with me, but birthday cake is not a
Speaker 2: flavor by itself.
Speaker 1: Birthday cake is a thing, yes right.
Speaker 2: Birthday cake can be chocolate. Birthday cake can be strawberry.
Speaker 2: Birthday cake can be strawberry and vanilla.
Speaker 1: It can be red velvety exactly, so it can be
Speaker 1: Devil's food, it can be Angels food.
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, yes, back to what I'm trying to say
Speaker 2: is strawberry birthday cake makes sense, strawberry birthday cake. But
Speaker 2: when it's by itself, come at me.
Speaker 1: Now, is it the cake or is it the frosting
Speaker 1: that they're talking about?
Speaker 2: Exactly?
Speaker 1: There's so many variables when you're talking about birthday cake.
Speaker 2: Sprinkles, Yeah, I love the sprinkles.
Speaker 1: Can I tell you a funny story real quick. Yeah,
Speaker 1: The first time my wife ever met my aunt, we
Speaker 1: were coming out of a cold Stone creamery. Okay, she's
Speaker 1: an older woman. Yeah, And I said, oh my goodness, Amy,
Speaker 1: this is my aunt Betty. Aunt Betty, this is Amy
Speaker 1: and Aunt Betty smiled, and her teeth were full of
Speaker 1: chocolate sprinkles. Oh no, so from that day fourth we
Speaker 1: call her sprinkles.
Speaker 3: I love it.
Speaker 2: That's cute, all right, that was wholesome.
Speaker 1: I hope she doesn't have a smartphone because she doesn't
Speaker 1: know that. All right, let's go into the Kellogg's True
Speaker 1: Loops birthday cake strawberry cereal.
Speaker 2: Here it is, okay.
Speaker 1: It tastes like it's been sitting on the shelf for
Speaker 1: a long time. I don't like it.
Speaker 2: It tastes like buttered popcorn.
Speaker 1: Yes, it does have an aftertaste of buttered popcorn.
Speaker 2: It's nasty. That's buttered popcorn in a box. Mast is
Speaker 2: strawberry birthday cake.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna just I'm just one one more, just in case.
Speaker 2: Huh, this gets a bowl and a spoon. That was
Speaker 2: not good. Throw it away, burn the box, call it
Speaker 2: a day.
Speaker 1: I'm going to give it a ball. Not good. I
Speaker 1: was very I was looking forward to it. I really was.
Speaker 2: That's good, and that's one of us. Well, you look
Speaker 2: very sad. Now I feel bad.
Speaker 1: I keep stepping on this one loop that's on the
Speaker 1: floor and you have no shoes on. You're gonna cut
Speaker 1: your foot on this loop?
Speaker 2: Are they that's sharp? I mean maybe these are because
Speaker 2: they taste a little stale.
Speaker 1: On top of that, it's a fresh, brand new box.
Speaker 1: It's a you know, it's a limited edition, which means
Speaker 1: it won't be around long. So if you want to
Speaker 1: try don't. If you want to try it, you better hurry.
Speaker 2: Don't go rush to try it because it's trash.
Speaker 1: We should rename him too, can't, Sam.
Speaker 2: This is the fourth joke you've made.
Speaker 1: We should probably go now because we're getting delirious. There's
Speaker 1: lots of sugar in our systems.
Speaker 2: There really isn't because now that you are healthy and
Speaker 2: you only eat one spoonful, we really don't have that
Speaker 2: much sugar.
Speaker 1: I did have two spoonfuls because I just needed to
Speaker 1: make sure it would sucked.
Speaker 2: Like the life I might go back to, because I
Speaker 2: like the life you did. Rightful?
Speaker 1: Yay, all right, we have to go because it's I
Speaker 1: don't know which is getting out of control. I can't
Speaker 1: believe you're still listening to it. Thank you appreciate that.
Speaker 1: Oh you know what, just try the milk. Try the
Speaker 1: birthday cake milk, would you please? I'm thinking that might
Speaker 1: save it.
Speaker 2: Nope, buttered popcorn milk. All right, the last thing I
Speaker 2: ever wanted to try it?
Speaker 1: Please follow us on Twitter as serial killers peec that's
Speaker 1: cereal with the sea. What's going on over there.
Speaker 2: In my brain? Just out of something?
Speaker 3: Yes?
Speaker 2: Was there ever chocolate fruit loops?
Speaker 3: Well, think about it.
Speaker 1: Think about what you just said. So no, unless they
Speaker 1: just threw a new fruit named chocolate. No, oh god, okay,
Speaker 1: thanks my.
Speaker 3: Find this moment.
Speaker 2: But think about it. What if they did, like chocolate
Speaker 2: covered strawberry chocolate covered like you know what I'm saying, Like.
Speaker 1: They other loop cereals in chocolate form, but there's never
Speaker 1: been chocolate fruit loops.
Speaker 2: This needs to be a thing. Get on it, fruit loops.
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna eat it or like it, but like
Speaker 2: a chocolate covered strawberry chocolate wildberry.
Speaker 1: You hate the strawberry fruit loops, so why would you
Speaker 1: want chocolate covered strawberry fruit loop?
Speaker 2: Well? How do I know which one was a strawberry
Speaker 2: colored one? I just assume it's the red one in
Speaker 2: the regular box.
Speaker 1: I think I'm nauseous. I'm getting dizzy. I'm dizzy. Why,
Speaker 1: I'm not sure?
Speaker 2: Are you gonna pass out?
Speaker 1: We should go now? Thank you for listening to Cereal Killers.
Speaker 1: An a whole new episode in just a few days.
Speaker 1: Bet you can't wait unless there's some sort of cereal
Speaker 1: emergency and we'll give you a bonus on a Wednesday.
Speaker 1: I don't know what day this, I don't know what's
Speaker 1: going on. What's my name?
Speaker 2: I'm worried about your well being if you pass out.
Speaker 2: I don't know any of the CPR.
Speaker 1: Any of the CPR. Thanks for listening to Serial Killers.
Speaker 1: Did you want to say something else? Andrew?
Speaker 3: Yes? What?
Speaker 2: Make sure if you're enjoying this podcast, you're a newcomer,
Speaker 2: you're like, whoa, this was great. I loved it so much,
Speaker 2: make sure you hit the subscribe button because then when
Speaker 2: we put up new episodes, they go straight to your smartphone.
Speaker 2: And if you also feel in client, please leave us
Speaker 2: a review. Reviews help us get better.
Speaker 1: You know, as of this recording, we have almost four
Speaker 1: hundred followers on Twitter.
Speaker 2: That's crazy, that's pretty cool. Yeah, I love our Twitter followers.
Speaker 2: Are so nice.
Speaker 1: They are some of them are a bit out of
Speaker 1: their minds. Won't mention any names, but thank you very
Speaker 1: much for following us. We love you nonetheless. So let's
Speaker 1: get out of here.
Speaker 2: You don't say that about our Cereal fans.
Speaker 1: They don't know who I'm talking about.
Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure. No, we love you all.
Speaker 1: I didn't say I don't love them. I just said
Speaker 1: some of them are out of their minds, like we are.
Speaker 2: Gotta go.
Speaker 1: Thanks for listening to Serial Killers, the podcast about Cereal
Speaker 1: Until We Meet Again. We like to say, Crunch, Crunch,
Speaker 1: shut up. Is Mikey dead? Yeah, no, he's definitely still alive.
Speaker 1: If you say he's dead, then how did he die?
Speaker 2: Because it wasn't the Pop Rocks Heroin.
Speaker 1: Was it the Heroin Life flavor? Yes, they discontinued that