1 00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:06,800 Speaker 1: Hi, Welcome back to Carol Markowitz Show on iHeartRadio, and 2 00:00:06,840 --> 00:00:07,360 Speaker 1: welcome to. 3 00:00:07,320 --> 00:00:09,360 Speaker 2: The new time slot. I'm so glad you're here. 4 00:00:09,760 --> 00:00:13,360 Speaker 1: The Carol Markowitz Show now airs Wednesdays and Fridays, so 5 00:00:13,400 --> 00:00:15,920 Speaker 1: you can get my non political show, this one, The 6 00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:19,800 Speaker 1: Carol Markowitz Show on Wednesdays and Fridays, and then normally 7 00:00:20,000 --> 00:00:23,400 Speaker 1: my political podcast that I co host with Mary Katherine 8 00:00:23,400 --> 00:00:26,680 Speaker 1: Ham every Tuesday and Thursday. The only day you don't 9 00:00:26,720 --> 00:00:31,320 Speaker 1: get me is Monday. Last week, we talked about loneliness 10 00:00:31,360 --> 00:00:35,479 Speaker 1: among teenagers, how hard it is not so much to 11 00:00:35,560 --> 00:00:40,680 Speaker 1: even make friends, but to maintain the friendships, to coordinate plans, 12 00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:43,839 Speaker 1: all of that. I said that every group of friends 13 00:00:44,080 --> 00:00:46,680 Speaker 1: needs a cruise director, and a few of you wrote 14 00:00:46,720 --> 00:00:50,200 Speaker 1: to me that you enjoyed the expression and usage. Today, 15 00:00:50,280 --> 00:00:53,440 Speaker 1: I want to talk about how to be likable, with 16 00:00:53,520 --> 00:00:57,800 Speaker 1: a focus on one part of likability being interesting. We 17 00:00:57,920 --> 00:01:01,720 Speaker 1: openly talk about this with our kids. In today's episode, 18 00:01:01,920 --> 00:01:05,240 Speaker 1: you'll hear Grace Curly say that her parents would advise 19 00:01:05,280 --> 00:01:08,920 Speaker 1: her and her siblings to quote land the plane when 20 00:01:08,920 --> 00:01:11,840 Speaker 1: one of their stories got too long winded. I feel 21 00:01:11,880 --> 00:01:15,040 Speaker 1: like there's this thing that parents are supposed to think 22 00:01:15,120 --> 00:01:18,600 Speaker 1: everything their kid does is perfect and amazing and never 23 00:01:18,680 --> 00:01:23,160 Speaker 1: correct them. I do not parent like that. You want 24 00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:25,480 Speaker 1: to teach your kids to be nice people, to be 25 00:01:25,600 --> 00:01:29,760 Speaker 1: good people, thoughtful, but also to be interesting people, not 26 00:01:29,920 --> 00:01:33,039 Speaker 1: annoying people. You want them to be the kind of 27 00:01:33,120 --> 00:01:37,120 Speaker 1: people that other people want to be around. One of 28 00:01:37,120 --> 00:01:39,679 Speaker 1: the things we tell our kids is that when you're 29 00:01:39,720 --> 00:01:43,840 Speaker 1: telling a story, make it funny, be interesting, don't just 30 00:01:44,080 --> 00:01:48,040 Speaker 1: ramble on the details of your day. We've all met 31 00:01:48,080 --> 00:01:51,840 Speaker 1: the adults who just love hearing themselves talk. I don't 32 00:01:51,840 --> 00:01:54,080 Speaker 1: want my kids to turn out like that. I want 33 00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:56,760 Speaker 1: their stories to have a point. I want them to 34 00:01:56,800 --> 00:02:00,000 Speaker 1: be interesting to listen to. There are other bad person 35 00:02:00,000 --> 00:02:04,280 Speaker 1: personality traits. We try to discourage them out of bragging, gossiping, 36 00:02:04,480 --> 00:02:08,880 Speaker 1: judging people too quickly, but being boring is one I 37 00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:11,960 Speaker 1: just don't hear discouraged that often. 38 00:02:12,560 --> 00:02:13,560 Speaker 2: You want to raise. 39 00:02:13,440 --> 00:02:15,760 Speaker 1: Kids to be the kind of adults that people will 40 00:02:15,800 --> 00:02:18,640 Speaker 1: gravitate to. You have to give them the tools to 41 00:02:18,720 --> 00:02:22,400 Speaker 1: do that early and to raise them to understand what 42 00:02:22,400 --> 00:02:25,040 Speaker 1: that means. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this, 43 00:02:25,160 --> 00:02:27,440 Speaker 1: or on any topic I talk about on the show. 44 00:02:28,080 --> 00:02:30,519 Speaker 1: How do you help your kids grow up? And become 45 00:02:30,720 --> 00:02:34,919 Speaker 1: likable people. Drop me an email. Carol Markowitz Show at 46 00:02:34,919 --> 00:02:38,519 Speaker 1: gmail dot com. That's k A r O L M 47 00:02:38,600 --> 00:02:42,480 Speaker 1: A r KO wi CS and Charlie Zas and Zebra 48 00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:47,120 Speaker 1: Show at gmail dot com. Join us after the break 49 00:02:47,160 --> 00:02:51,359 Speaker 1: with grace, curly, But first, the International Fellowship of Christians 50 00:02:51,360 --> 00:02:53,960 Speaker 1: and Jews, which is you a blessed Thanksgiving as you 51 00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:57,400 Speaker 1: gather with your families, grateful for the blessings that God 52 00:02:57,440 --> 00:03:00,160 Speaker 1: has given us all. But let's also remember, though, those 53 00:03:00,160 --> 00:03:04,320 Speaker 1: who are facing unbelievable hardship in need of food, fellowship, 54 00:03:04,480 --> 00:03:07,120 Speaker 1: and hope. That includes the people of Israel, who are 55 00:03:07,160 --> 00:03:11,520 Speaker 1: threatened daily by attacks from enemies on all sides. And 56 00:03:11,600 --> 00:03:15,359 Speaker 1: during these hard times, Israelis are thankful to the Fellowship 57 00:03:15,520 --> 00:03:20,000 Speaker 1: for food and basic assistance, truly life saving aid when 58 00:03:20,000 --> 00:03:22,760 Speaker 1: the rest of the world seems to have turned its 59 00:03:22,800 --> 00:03:26,160 Speaker 1: back on them. Your gift of twenty five dollars will 60 00:03:26,160 --> 00:03:29,440 Speaker 1: help provide a food box to an elderly Jew or 61 00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:33,000 Speaker 1: a Jewish family who are suffering and in desperate need. 62 00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:36,200 Speaker 1: A gift of one hundred dollars will help provide four 63 00:03:36,240 --> 00:03:40,280 Speaker 1: of these life saving food boxes this Thanksgiving. Please consider 64 00:03:40,360 --> 00:03:44,600 Speaker 1: standing with Israel and the Jewish people go to SUPPORTIFCJ 65 00:03:44,800 --> 00:03:49,880 Speaker 1: dot org to make a gift now, that's SUPPORTIFCJ dot org, 66 00:03:50,520 --> 00:03:53,560 Speaker 1: or call to give at eight eight eight for eight 67 00:03:53,600 --> 00:03:58,600 Speaker 1: eight IFCJ. That's eight eight eight four eight eight four 68 00:03:58,680 --> 00:04:04,880 Speaker 1: three two five. Welcome back to the Carol Marcowitz Show 69 00:04:04,880 --> 00:04:08,640 Speaker 1: on iHeartRadio. My guest today is Grace Curley, host of 70 00:04:08,680 --> 00:04:09,960 Speaker 1: The Grace Curly Show. 71 00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:12,680 Speaker 2: In New England. Hi, Grace, so nice to have you on. 72 00:04:13,160 --> 00:04:15,240 Speaker 3: Thank you so much, Carol. I'm honored to be here. 73 00:04:15,680 --> 00:04:18,680 Speaker 1: So it's funny because I you know, you're a big 74 00:04:18,680 --> 00:04:22,039 Speaker 1: deal overall, but you're really a big deal in New England. 75 00:04:22,279 --> 00:04:25,320 Speaker 1: I mean I meet people and they're like, I heard 76 00:04:25,360 --> 00:04:25,720 Speaker 1: you on. 77 00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:26,800 Speaker 2: The Grace Curly Show. 78 00:04:26,880 --> 00:04:29,880 Speaker 1: And that is a thing that I get quite often 79 00:04:30,000 --> 00:04:33,800 Speaker 1: from people like the Boston area particularly, How did you 80 00:04:33,839 --> 00:04:34,440 Speaker 1: get into this? 81 00:04:35,600 --> 00:04:37,359 Speaker 3: So I actually, first of all, that's so nice of 82 00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:40,520 Speaker 3: you to say. And whenever people say they listen to 83 00:04:40,520 --> 00:04:43,560 Speaker 3: the show, or especially wh people say I listen every 84 00:04:43,640 --> 00:04:46,480 Speaker 3: day for three hours, Yeah, God, that's so nice. 85 00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:49,159 Speaker 2: Really, that's what I feel like. 86 00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:51,520 Speaker 1: Your fan base is like they listen to you every 87 00:04:51,560 --> 00:04:52,560 Speaker 1: day for three hours. 88 00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:56,640 Speaker 4: It's the sweetest thing. And never It never ceases to. 89 00:04:56,600 --> 00:04:59,080 Speaker 3: Blow my mind, just because I that was always my 90 00:04:59,160 --> 00:05:00,960 Speaker 3: dream was that people would just let me talk for 91 00:05:01,000 --> 00:05:03,240 Speaker 3: a living. And now I'm like, wow, you guys really 92 00:05:03,240 --> 00:05:06,600 Speaker 3: made it happen for me. But yeah, I started. Actually, 93 00:05:06,680 --> 00:05:10,440 Speaker 3: I was a theater major at Providence College. I graduated, 94 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:15,480 Speaker 3: I started waitressing, and I was always a homebody. I 95 00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:18,240 Speaker 3: thought about maybe trying the theater thing. I give people 96 00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:21,400 Speaker 3: such credit who try to actually make it and showbiz, 97 00:05:22,760 --> 00:05:24,719 Speaker 3: and probably a little bit of an insecurity in me 98 00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:26,480 Speaker 3: didn't think I was cut out for it, and so 99 00:05:26,600 --> 00:05:30,039 Speaker 3: I at one point, my mom got an email from 100 00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:32,560 Speaker 3: Howie Carr and it was like one of those e 101 00:05:32,640 --> 00:05:34,320 Speaker 3: blasts where they send it out to a million people, 102 00:05:34,520 --> 00:05:36,120 Speaker 3: and they said, we're looking for someone to help with 103 00:05:36,160 --> 00:05:38,960 Speaker 3: books and shipping. And she said, this might be a 104 00:05:38,960 --> 00:05:40,960 Speaker 3: good way to get your foot in the door. And 105 00:05:41,200 --> 00:05:42,960 Speaker 3: I went in for an interview. I got the job, 106 00:05:42,960 --> 00:05:44,600 Speaker 3: and they were very honest. They said, this is going 107 00:05:44,640 --> 00:05:47,599 Speaker 3: to be, you know, it's going to be a gofer 108 00:05:47,600 --> 00:05:52,080 Speaker 3: a job essentially, right, a grontwork. And I said that's fine. 109 00:05:52,080 --> 00:05:54,039 Speaker 3: That's fine because it's a job and it's steady and 110 00:05:54,080 --> 00:05:56,600 Speaker 3: I can stay here, you know, I can stay in Massachusetts. 111 00:05:57,120 --> 00:05:59,240 Speaker 3: And I went home and I said to my mom, 112 00:05:59,279 --> 00:06:01,160 Speaker 3: I'm going to work for her How we Care and 113 00:06:01,160 --> 00:06:01,760 Speaker 3: for those who. 114 00:06:01,680 --> 00:06:05,760 Speaker 1: Don't know, How we Car super big deal in New England. Yes, 115 00:06:06,080 --> 00:06:10,160 Speaker 1: very recognizable radio host and beloved by many. 116 00:06:10,800 --> 00:06:12,640 Speaker 3: Yes. And my mom has listened. My mom and dad 117 00:06:12,640 --> 00:06:14,599 Speaker 3: have listened to him forever. And my mom is so 118 00:06:14,640 --> 00:06:18,480 Speaker 3: funny Carol. She's like she always whatever you tell her, 119 00:06:18,960 --> 00:06:21,680 Speaker 3: and my dad's like this too. It's like they are 120 00:06:21,880 --> 00:06:24,720 Speaker 3: big dreamers, especially for us. And so immediately when I 121 00:06:24,760 --> 00:06:26,760 Speaker 3: told her that, I said, I'm going to be packaging 122 00:06:26,760 --> 00:06:29,160 Speaker 3: books up in their garage. And she said, you're going 123 00:06:29,200 --> 00:06:31,120 Speaker 3: to be on the radio with How We Care And 124 00:06:31,160 --> 00:06:34,520 Speaker 3: I said, that's not I'm doing. 125 00:06:34,640 --> 00:06:37,640 Speaker 2: But going to be getting coffee exactly. 126 00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:39,839 Speaker 3: Over the years it kind of dis evolved from there. 127 00:06:39,960 --> 00:06:40,960 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's amazing. 128 00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:43,479 Speaker 1: So you didn't always want to be in radio or 129 00:06:43,680 --> 00:06:46,320 Speaker 1: that was sort of a backup plan to being in theater. 130 00:06:47,839 --> 00:06:51,760 Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, it's like I always liked performing in 131 00:06:51,800 --> 00:06:54,520 Speaker 3: one way or another. I loved entertaining. I grew up 132 00:06:54,560 --> 00:06:58,279 Speaker 3: in a family where and maybe this is like the 133 00:06:58,320 --> 00:07:03,160 Speaker 3: irishists I saw, like Joe Biden, but we were big storytellers. 134 00:07:03,200 --> 00:07:04,800 Speaker 3: I have an older brother, a younger brother, and a 135 00:07:04,800 --> 00:07:07,479 Speaker 3: younger sister. My parents are big storytellers. They're both from 136 00:07:07,480 --> 00:07:10,480 Speaker 3: South Boston, and so sitting around the table at night, 137 00:07:11,200 --> 00:07:15,080 Speaker 3: it was it was almost like a competition. It was like, 138 00:07:15,120 --> 00:07:17,880 Speaker 3: what story do you have? Land the plane? You're losing us, 139 00:07:17,920 --> 00:07:18,600 Speaker 3: what else happened? 140 00:07:19,440 --> 00:07:21,200 Speaker 2: I love that. I'm going to use land the plane 141 00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:23,640 Speaker 2: with my kids, like land that plane? Where is the 142 00:07:23,680 --> 00:07:24,320 Speaker 2: story going? 143 00:07:24,680 --> 00:07:27,400 Speaker 3: And you know what, Carol, people, you grow up and 144 00:07:27,440 --> 00:07:30,120 Speaker 3: you start to say to yourself, no one told us person, 145 00:07:30,120 --> 00:07:32,760 Speaker 3: no one told them, right, And my mom told us 146 00:07:32,760 --> 00:07:34,560 Speaker 3: all And you know what else she would do. She's 147 00:07:34,600 --> 00:07:36,559 Speaker 3: so funny. She would if you were telling a story 148 00:07:36,560 --> 00:07:38,960 Speaker 3: and you were saying like like like like like like like, 149 00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:43,040 Speaker 3: she would start going every time I said what she said, 150 00:07:43,080 --> 00:07:45,720 Speaker 3: I'm not not putting it into this world saying like 151 00:07:45,760 --> 00:07:46,720 Speaker 3: all the time. Right. 152 00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:49,360 Speaker 4: But yeah, it was just I love talking. 153 00:07:49,480 --> 00:07:53,480 Speaker 3: I love talking, and it doesn't matter if it's a 154 00:07:53,680 --> 00:07:56,600 Speaker 3: Thanksgiving party with people or if it was in school. 155 00:07:56,800 --> 00:07:59,040 Speaker 4: It was always what I love to do. 156 00:07:59,080 --> 00:08:01,280 Speaker 3: And making people laugh was a big part of it too, 157 00:08:02,440 --> 00:08:04,200 Speaker 3: And that's where I think the theater came in. Was 158 00:08:04,240 --> 00:08:07,880 Speaker 3: I loved the crazy roles or the media goals, and 159 00:08:07,920 --> 00:08:10,680 Speaker 3: so that was probably what led me to this spot. 160 00:08:10,880 --> 00:08:13,080 Speaker 1: I actually tell my kids, be funny when you're telling 161 00:08:13,080 --> 00:08:15,960 Speaker 1: a story like it engages the people more so. But 162 00:08:16,080 --> 00:08:18,320 Speaker 1: Land the Plane is something I'm going to be using 163 00:08:18,360 --> 00:08:21,000 Speaker 1: from here on out. What do you consider your beat 164 00:08:21,160 --> 00:08:22,280 Speaker 1: at the grayst Curly Show. 165 00:08:22,480 --> 00:08:25,680 Speaker 3: I think my beat is and I try to mix 166 00:08:25,760 --> 00:08:29,360 Speaker 3: it up, but I always find myself coming back to 167 00:08:29,440 --> 00:08:33,680 Speaker 3: media and the distortion that we get from these people 168 00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:38,840 Speaker 3: who for basically my entire life, but it's definitely ramped 169 00:08:38,880 --> 00:08:41,040 Speaker 3: up in the last couple of years, have been hell 170 00:08:41,120 --> 00:08:46,320 Speaker 3: bent on convincing the masses that someone like me, or 171 00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:48,920 Speaker 3: someone like someone in my family because a lot of 172 00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:51,800 Speaker 3: us align the same way politically, are bad people. And 173 00:08:51,840 --> 00:08:54,760 Speaker 3: it just never sat right with me, and I always 174 00:08:54,760 --> 00:08:56,920 Speaker 3: thought there was a disconnect there. I always thought the 175 00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:59,080 Speaker 3: media was out of step with a lot of the 176 00:08:59,120 --> 00:09:02,679 Speaker 3: people I know and love, and it's only amped up. 177 00:09:02,880 --> 00:09:07,840 Speaker 3: And also at this point now my rolodex is these people, 178 00:09:08,040 --> 00:09:11,160 Speaker 3: which is like one of my coworker says, we could 179 00:09:11,200 --> 00:09:13,079 Speaker 3: play you a cut of someone on MSNBC and you 180 00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:15,600 Speaker 3: would probably know their name just by listening. To it right, 181 00:09:16,000 --> 00:09:18,560 Speaker 3: and I'm like, it's such a niche skill I have. 182 00:09:19,760 --> 00:09:22,240 Speaker 3: It's not going to play in any other industry, but 183 00:09:22,280 --> 00:09:26,080 Speaker 3: it's definitely become something I always even when I'm writing, 184 00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:28,600 Speaker 3: and I know you know this, you write about the 185 00:09:28,600 --> 00:09:31,000 Speaker 3: things you know really well, and sometimes you try. 186 00:09:30,800 --> 00:09:31,960 Speaker 4: To branch out and it's harder. 187 00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:34,040 Speaker 3: It's harder to like do research and stuff like that 188 00:09:34,080 --> 00:09:36,360 Speaker 3: when it's not something you're as used to. Probably good 189 00:09:36,440 --> 00:09:39,520 Speaker 3: to do it sometimes, But the ones I find flow 190 00:09:39,600 --> 00:09:43,680 Speaker 3: for me the easiest are when I'm just hammering the media, right. 191 00:09:44,160 --> 00:09:46,920 Speaker 1: That's a when you're passionate about the topic, you just 192 00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:50,120 Speaker 1: sound so much clearer and better on it. So do 193 00:09:50,160 --> 00:09:53,200 Speaker 1: you think the media dials it back now that they've 194 00:09:53,240 --> 00:09:55,960 Speaker 1: lost in such a major way with the Trump reelection? 195 00:09:56,960 --> 00:09:59,840 Speaker 3: From what I've been seeing this morning, and like, you know, 196 00:09:59,880 --> 00:10:01,720 Speaker 3: you you have to keep in mind, we got the 197 00:10:01,760 --> 00:10:04,840 Speaker 3: results or it was pretty much called for Trump at 198 00:10:04,920 --> 00:10:06,760 Speaker 3: like two am, so a lot of the late night 199 00:10:06,800 --> 00:10:09,720 Speaker 3: shows it didn't come out until last night their feelings 200 00:10:09,720 --> 00:10:09,920 Speaker 3: on it. 201 00:10:09,960 --> 00:10:11,080 Speaker 4: I'm going to say, no, there. 202 00:10:11,000 --> 00:10:13,680 Speaker 2: Was recording this just a few days after the election. 203 00:10:13,800 --> 00:10:14,400 Speaker 2: Two days after. 204 00:10:14,559 --> 00:10:16,319 Speaker 3: Yeah, there is a lot of crying. 205 00:10:16,559 --> 00:10:17,080 Speaker 4: There was a lot. 206 00:10:17,160 --> 00:10:19,240 Speaker 3: It doesn't seem like there was a lot of self reflection, 207 00:10:19,559 --> 00:10:25,240 Speaker 3: and it's so disappointing because you always I always want that, 208 00:10:25,280 --> 00:10:28,160 Speaker 3: like I always do want just that moment of we 209 00:10:28,280 --> 00:10:32,000 Speaker 3: got this wrong. And I actually thinks it's a really 210 00:10:32,600 --> 00:10:35,120 Speaker 3: great thing about life if you're able to look at 211 00:10:35,120 --> 00:10:37,920 Speaker 3: things and say, I didn't see it from that perspective. 212 00:10:37,920 --> 00:10:40,200 Speaker 3: And I actually I have an editor who is a 213 00:10:40,200 --> 00:10:43,400 Speaker 3: little bit more I don't want to say liberal, because 214 00:10:43,480 --> 00:10:46,920 Speaker 3: I actually really don't know, but he's more just interested 215 00:10:46,960 --> 00:10:50,360 Speaker 3: in good writing, and he will oftentimes I'll come forward 216 00:10:50,400 --> 00:10:53,360 Speaker 3: with an idea that in some other places I could 217 00:10:53,360 --> 00:10:55,800 Speaker 3: get by with and he'll challenge me on it, and 218 00:10:55,880 --> 00:10:59,160 Speaker 3: he'll say, I don't think that's really I think you're 219 00:10:59,559 --> 00:11:03,080 Speaker 3: general or I think you're demonizing one side of it. 220 00:11:03,200 --> 00:11:05,160 Speaker 3: And to have someone in your life who's doing that, 221 00:11:05,200 --> 00:11:06,840 Speaker 3: I don't think these people in the media have that 222 00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:10,320 Speaker 3: to hold together, egging each other on I. 223 00:11:10,240 --> 00:11:12,120 Speaker 2: Was going to say, I don't think that exists. On 224 00:11:12,160 --> 00:11:15,600 Speaker 2: the other side. I don't think they have an. 225 00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:18,400 Speaker 1: Editor that maybe leans a little more conservative or even moderate, 226 00:11:18,760 --> 00:11:21,160 Speaker 1: who is like, I don't know that this column makes 227 00:11:21,200 --> 00:11:24,000 Speaker 1: any sense because I read those columns and they don't 228 00:11:24,040 --> 00:11:24,800 Speaker 1: make a lot of sense. 229 00:11:25,640 --> 00:11:28,800 Speaker 3: Yeah, and also just to say just to kind of 230 00:11:28,840 --> 00:11:32,240 Speaker 3: have that moment of where can we improve? 231 00:11:32,480 --> 00:11:33,200 Speaker 4: What are people? 232 00:11:33,880 --> 00:11:35,880 Speaker 3: And when you keep doing The thing that scares me 233 00:11:35,960 --> 00:11:38,240 Speaker 3: though is that. And I was thinking about this this morning. 234 00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:40,120 Speaker 3: I saw this video and I should send it to you, Carol, 235 00:11:40,160 --> 00:11:42,280 Speaker 3: because you would definitely have I know that you're beat 236 00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:45,400 Speaker 3: oftentimes as parents and you know, the family unit. 237 00:11:45,760 --> 00:11:47,920 Speaker 4: It was these parents who were telling their. 238 00:11:47,840 --> 00:11:51,160 Speaker 3: Children about the election, and the children were like hyperventilating 239 00:11:52,160 --> 00:11:55,000 Speaker 3: and they were feeding into it like this. 240 00:11:54,880 --> 00:11:56,199 Speaker 4: Is what it's going to look like today. 241 00:11:56,440 --> 00:11:56,760 Speaker 1: Crazy. 242 00:11:56,800 --> 00:12:02,520 Speaker 3: And I thought that is the direct result of these 243 00:12:02,600 --> 00:12:06,240 Speaker 3: parents being so entrenched in what the media is telling them, 244 00:12:06,280 --> 00:12:09,560 Speaker 3: and now they're convincing their children that they're in danger somehow, 245 00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:12,760 Speaker 3: and it's just it's like malpractice. It's like this is dangerous. 246 00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:14,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, you know. 247 00:12:14,120 --> 00:12:16,960 Speaker 1: I have a friend who said to me that his 248 00:12:17,280 --> 00:12:21,640 Speaker 1: college freshman daughter her roommate, was crying about the Donald 249 00:12:21,679 --> 00:12:24,600 Speaker 1: Trump win. And I said to my fourteen year old daughter, 250 00:12:24,679 --> 00:12:28,120 Speaker 1: if I ever hear you crying about a politician win 251 00:12:29,000 --> 00:12:31,920 Speaker 1: or loss in America, like I'm going to have some 252 00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:33,240 Speaker 1: problems with that. 253 00:12:33,240 --> 00:12:36,080 Speaker 2: That is not something you cry about. Cry about things 254 00:12:36,080 --> 00:12:37,000 Speaker 2: that are close to you. 255 00:12:36,920 --> 00:12:38,640 Speaker 1: And that matter to you and that are important to 256 00:12:38,679 --> 00:12:41,600 Speaker 1: your family, not about someone you don't know. There was 257 00:12:41,600 --> 00:12:45,199 Speaker 1: that movie A Bronx Tale a long time ago where 258 00:12:45,600 --> 00:12:48,600 Speaker 1: the gangster guy tells the little Italian kid. He says, 259 00:12:48,960 --> 00:12:50,880 Speaker 1: Mickey Mantle doesn't pay your rent and. 260 00:12:50,840 --> 00:12:53,360 Speaker 2: He doesn't know who you are. That's how people. 261 00:12:53,160 --> 00:12:55,880 Speaker 1: Should think about politicians. They don't pay your rent, they 262 00:12:55,880 --> 00:12:58,040 Speaker 1: don't know who you are. If you can support them, 263 00:12:58,040 --> 00:13:00,480 Speaker 1: you can hope for good policies for them from them, 264 00:13:00,480 --> 00:13:04,240 Speaker 1: you can lobby them to get those policies, but don't 265 00:13:04,320 --> 00:13:05,120 Speaker 1: cry over them. 266 00:13:05,240 --> 00:13:06,160 Speaker 2: I mean, they don't know. 267 00:13:06,080 --> 00:13:07,360 Speaker 4: You, Carol. 268 00:13:07,440 --> 00:13:10,480 Speaker 3: You have such a way, and I mean this so genuinely, 269 00:13:10,520 --> 00:13:12,559 Speaker 3: Like sometimes you'll tweet something out and it will stick 270 00:13:12,600 --> 00:13:14,120 Speaker 3: with me, and I'm sure you think I'm crazy because 271 00:13:14,120 --> 00:13:16,280 Speaker 3: I'll retweet it like years later, but it will stick 272 00:13:16,320 --> 00:13:17,360 Speaker 3: with me for years. 273 00:13:17,440 --> 00:13:18,360 Speaker 4: And once the night that. 274 00:13:18,600 --> 00:13:22,520 Speaker 3: Was you were like, if you were blessed with a 275 00:13:22,559 --> 00:13:25,440 Speaker 3: wonderful family, you were already on third base. If you 276 00:13:25,559 --> 00:13:28,640 Speaker 3: let any of that go, politics is never going to 277 00:13:28,679 --> 00:13:30,280 Speaker 3: love you back. And I was like, this is what 278 00:13:30,280 --> 00:13:32,720 Speaker 3: people need to hear. It's like if you have good 279 00:13:32,760 --> 00:13:35,320 Speaker 3: people in your life, and you were even getting close 280 00:13:35,360 --> 00:13:37,959 Speaker 3: to jeopardizing that for politics. 281 00:13:38,720 --> 00:13:39,800 Speaker 4: You've lost the plot. 282 00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:41,520 Speaker 2: That's it, I mean, that's really it. 283 00:13:41,679 --> 00:13:44,040 Speaker 1: And you know that tweet is so funny because it 284 00:13:44,120 --> 00:13:46,839 Speaker 1: was pretty popular. Although I didn't think I said anything 285 00:13:46,840 --> 00:13:50,680 Speaker 1: that earth shattering. Tucker Carlson texted me about that tweet 286 00:13:50,720 --> 00:13:50,960 Speaker 1: and was. 287 00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:52,880 Speaker 2: Like, this, this is it. You know, this is exactly 288 00:13:52,960 --> 00:13:56,439 Speaker 2: what people should, you know, think, I don't know. I 289 00:13:56,679 --> 00:13:59,280 Speaker 2: come from a small, fractured family. 290 00:13:59,360 --> 00:14:01,200 Speaker 1: The idea to mean that we would fall out over 291 00:14:01,320 --> 00:14:04,120 Speaker 1: politics is hilarious, you know. 292 00:14:04,280 --> 00:14:06,000 Speaker 2: I just I don't get that at all. 293 00:14:06,160 --> 00:14:10,000 Speaker 1: And it's really unfortunate to me that that does happen 294 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:11,920 Speaker 1: in families and happens all the time. I hear from 295 00:14:11,920 --> 00:14:16,160 Speaker 1: people constantly. My daughter's not speaking to me, you know, 296 00:14:16,280 --> 00:14:20,080 Speaker 1: my mother is icing me out. I mean, really really 297 00:14:20,160 --> 00:14:23,720 Speaker 1: terrible stuff. And it's sad, and I wish our culture 298 00:14:24,440 --> 00:14:27,520 Speaker 1: kind of frowned on it more. I wish those parents 299 00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:31,760 Speaker 1: were told by their liberal friends, don't scare your children 300 00:14:31,840 --> 00:14:32,040 Speaker 1: like this. 301 00:14:32,200 --> 00:14:33,520 Speaker 2: It's not necessary. 302 00:14:33,560 --> 00:14:35,760 Speaker 1: They can't do anything about the election, Like you don't 303 00:14:35,800 --> 00:14:39,800 Speaker 1: need to send them to school worried and concerned about 304 00:14:39,840 --> 00:14:40,400 Speaker 1: their future. 305 00:14:40,480 --> 00:14:44,520 Speaker 2: It's just it's a crazy thing to do. I really 306 00:14:44,600 --> 00:14:45,080 Speaker 2: do think so. 307 00:14:46,280 --> 00:14:48,840 Speaker 3: And the thing you just said about when you can't 308 00:14:49,160 --> 00:14:53,240 Speaker 3: do something about it, like, that's something that's if you 309 00:14:53,320 --> 00:14:56,000 Speaker 3: just zoom out from that. That's something that I have, 310 00:14:57,400 --> 00:15:00,280 Speaker 3: I think improved it in life where I really look 311 00:15:00,280 --> 00:15:02,720 Speaker 3: at things now and I go, can I do anything 312 00:15:02,800 --> 00:15:05,840 Speaker 3: about this? Because I have this mentality and actually it's 313 00:15:05,840 --> 00:15:09,000 Speaker 3: happened to me before with real things, like real real 314 00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:11,400 Speaker 3: issues that have come up where and I'll just give 315 00:15:11,400 --> 00:15:12,920 Speaker 3: an example. I had a family member who was sick 316 00:15:12,960 --> 00:15:16,520 Speaker 3: and thank god, they're miraculous recovery and it was wonderful. 317 00:15:16,160 --> 00:15:16,600 Speaker 1: Thank God. 318 00:15:17,120 --> 00:15:20,480 Speaker 4: But at the time, I have. 319 00:15:20,360 --> 00:15:22,360 Speaker 3: This mind sometimes and I've talked to people about it, 320 00:15:22,400 --> 00:15:25,360 Speaker 3: I've worked on it, where it's this idea of if 321 00:15:25,440 --> 00:15:29,560 Speaker 3: I worry about this enough, then it's going to help, and. 322 00:15:29,440 --> 00:15:30,400 Speaker 4: It's my job. 323 00:15:31,120 --> 00:15:34,520 Speaker 3: It's my job, and that way the universe knows I 324 00:15:34,560 --> 00:15:36,760 Speaker 3: care so much about this, right, I'm going to make 325 00:15:36,800 --> 00:15:39,240 Speaker 3: myself sick over it. And it's like I remember someone 326 00:15:39,280 --> 00:15:41,960 Speaker 3: saying to me when this family member got sick, don't 327 00:15:41,960 --> 00:15:44,640 Speaker 3: go on Google tonight, like, don't start googling things. And 328 00:15:44,720 --> 00:15:48,000 Speaker 3: I in my head was thinking, oh my god, I'm 329 00:15:48,040 --> 00:15:49,400 Speaker 3: going to spend all night on Reddit, like. 330 00:15:49,320 --> 00:15:50,520 Speaker 2: I definitely googling. 331 00:15:50,680 --> 00:15:52,520 Speaker 4: Yeah, there's not even a question. 332 00:15:52,640 --> 00:15:53,920 Speaker 3: I'm going to be googling for the rest of the 333 00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:58,400 Speaker 3: night because that's my that's my way of helping the situation. 334 00:15:58,520 --> 00:16:00,440 Speaker 3: And the older I get, the more I really have 335 00:16:00,480 --> 00:16:03,440 Speaker 3: to stop myself and say, what's your control here? And 336 00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:05,440 Speaker 3: I felt like this about this last election. I wanted 337 00:16:05,440 --> 00:16:09,240 Speaker 3: Trump to win, but on the Monday before I felt 338 00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:11,840 Speaker 3: this like odd sense of calmness, which is anyone who 339 00:16:11,880 --> 00:16:15,560 Speaker 3: knows me. It's not it's not my usual place to be. 340 00:16:16,680 --> 00:16:19,160 Speaker 3: But I was like, you don't have You've said your piece, 341 00:16:19,360 --> 00:16:21,920 Speaker 3: you've done, you voted, Like, what else can you do? 342 00:16:22,320 --> 00:16:24,360 Speaker 2: Right, it's out of your hands? What are you going 343 00:16:24,400 --> 00:16:24,640 Speaker 2: to do? 344 00:16:25,040 --> 00:16:25,240 Speaker 3: More? 345 00:16:25,320 --> 00:16:26,440 Speaker 2: Coming up in a minute with. 346 00:16:26,400 --> 00:16:31,000 Speaker 1: Grace Curley, But first, Americans are tired and frustrated by 347 00:16:31,040 --> 00:16:35,920 Speaker 1: a stalling economy, inflation, endless wars, and the relentless assault 348 00:16:36,040 --> 00:16:40,400 Speaker 1: on our values. Thankfully, there's companies like Patriot Mobile that 349 00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:44,520 Speaker 1: still believe in America and our constitution. I'm proud to 350 00:16:44,600 --> 00:16:47,680 Speaker 1: partner with Patriot Mobile because they are on the front 351 00:16:47,720 --> 00:16:52,080 Speaker 1: lines fighting for the first and second Amendments, sanctity of life, 352 00:16:52,240 --> 00:16:56,400 Speaker 1: and our military and first responder heroes. Take a stand 353 00:16:56,440 --> 00:17:00,360 Speaker 1: for conservative causes and put America first. By switch to 354 00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:04,400 Speaker 1: Patriot Mobile today, You'll get the same nationwide coverage as 355 00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:08,760 Speaker 1: the big providers because Patriot Mobile operates across all three 356 00:17:08,880 --> 00:17:13,600 Speaker 1: major networks, plus they back their service with a coverage guarantee. 357 00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:17,800 Speaker 1: They're one hundred percent US based. Customer service team will 358 00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:21,600 Speaker 1: find the best plan for your needs. Keep your number, 359 00:17:21,880 --> 00:17:25,920 Speaker 1: keep your phone, or upgrade. Go to Patriot Mobile slash 360 00:17:26,000 --> 00:17:29,200 Speaker 1: KA r O L, or call nine seven to two 361 00:17:29,400 --> 00:17:32,680 Speaker 1: Patriot right now. Get a free month when you use 362 00:17:32,720 --> 00:17:36,440 Speaker 1: the offer code Carol k A R O L. Don't 363 00:17:36,440 --> 00:17:39,840 Speaker 1: get fooled by other providers pretending to share your values 364 00:17:39,920 --> 00:17:43,159 Speaker 1: or have the same coverage. They don't and they can't. 365 00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:48,800 Speaker 1: Switch to America's only Christian conservative mobile provider, Patriot Mobile. 366 00:17:49,160 --> 00:17:52,360 Speaker 1: Go to Patriotmobile dot com slash Carol with A K 367 00:17:52,560 --> 00:17:55,560 Speaker 1: KA r O L, or call nine seven to two 368 00:17:55,760 --> 00:18:03,680 Speaker 1: Patriot for your free month of service today. So that 369 00:18:03,760 --> 00:18:05,480 Speaker 1: leads me to a question that I ask all of 370 00:18:05,480 --> 00:18:07,840 Speaker 1: my guests, which is what do you worry about? 371 00:18:08,119 --> 00:18:09,800 Speaker 2: What's like? What keeps you up? 372 00:18:11,160 --> 00:18:13,680 Speaker 3: This is not a groundbreaking at all. I don't think 373 00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:16,280 Speaker 3: for people. I and I've been like this since I 374 00:18:16,359 --> 00:18:20,320 Speaker 3: was young. I'm a nervous nelly. So I worry about 375 00:18:20,720 --> 00:18:25,040 Speaker 3: my family, and I worry about losing people, and I 376 00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:28,520 Speaker 3: worry about like I was the kid who I'm the 377 00:18:28,520 --> 00:18:30,520 Speaker 3: oldest daughter. And I think that does explain. I see 378 00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:32,640 Speaker 3: those memes and stuff about the oldest daughter fame girl. 379 00:18:32,720 --> 00:18:34,359 Speaker 2: Same, Yeah, I think. 380 00:18:34,280 --> 00:18:37,560 Speaker 3: It actually does explain because like these are two these 381 00:18:37,600 --> 00:18:38,400 Speaker 3: make too much sense. 382 00:18:38,440 --> 00:18:39,560 Speaker 4: It does explain a lot. 383 00:18:39,560 --> 00:18:41,840 Speaker 2: They always fit so well, so well. 384 00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:44,760 Speaker 3: And I was the child who was calling my parents 385 00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:48,479 Speaker 3: up being like, when are you coming home? Are you okay? 386 00:18:48,880 --> 00:18:50,919 Speaker 3: It's snowing out, be careful? And my parents are like 387 00:18:51,040 --> 00:18:59,760 Speaker 3: Jesus girls, And so that's I will say. Though, what's 388 00:18:59,800 --> 00:19:01,840 Speaker 3: in me is I don't have like any sort of 389 00:19:02,119 --> 00:19:06,399 Speaker 3: hypochondria or anything. I don't worry about Like I know 390 00:19:06,440 --> 00:19:08,560 Speaker 3: some people fear death and they feel all these things. 391 00:19:08,760 --> 00:19:11,199 Speaker 3: I never think about that. For me, I worry about it. 392 00:19:11,240 --> 00:19:14,560 Speaker 3: I almost like project it outwards and worry about everybody else. 393 00:19:14,720 --> 00:19:17,680 Speaker 1: Well, that's very older older child syndrome. You don't worry 394 00:19:17,680 --> 00:19:19,360 Speaker 1: about yourself. You have all these other people to worry 395 00:19:19,400 --> 00:19:21,600 Speaker 1: about and you ever focus on yourself. 396 00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:25,080 Speaker 3: I said to somebody once, this sums up my fear, okay, 397 00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:27,280 Speaker 3: And it was the funniest thing I said to someone once, 398 00:19:27,720 --> 00:19:30,720 Speaker 3: I wish I could take it. Sounds so crazy saying, 399 00:19:31,160 --> 00:19:32,639 Speaker 3: I said, I wish I could take all the people 400 00:19:32,680 --> 00:19:35,919 Speaker 3: I love and put them in a giant bubble and 401 00:19:35,960 --> 00:19:38,000 Speaker 3: so I know everyone's okay all the time. And my 402 00:19:38,080 --> 00:19:39,800 Speaker 3: friend said, that's a problem. 403 00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:42,879 Speaker 2: They don't want to live in the bubble. 404 00:19:42,880 --> 00:19:46,280 Speaker 3: It turns out, yeah, life is living, So that would 405 00:19:46,280 --> 00:19:46,680 Speaker 3: be my fear. 406 00:19:47,320 --> 00:19:48,560 Speaker 2: That makes a lot of sense. 407 00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:51,520 Speaker 1: What advice would you give your sixteen year old self, like, 408 00:19:51,880 --> 00:19:54,800 Speaker 1: would you direct her to worry less about this kind 409 00:19:54,840 --> 00:19:56,520 Speaker 1: of thing or something else? 410 00:19:57,600 --> 00:19:59,439 Speaker 4: You know, I think what I would say. I I 411 00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:00,800 Speaker 4: was thinking about this morning. 412 00:20:02,119 --> 00:20:05,680 Speaker 3: I'm a homebody by nature, and I think I've spent 413 00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:09,000 Speaker 3: a lot of time in my early life trying to 414 00:20:09,160 --> 00:20:13,200 Speaker 3: fight that a little bit. And I think that I'm 415 00:20:13,240 --> 00:20:15,119 Speaker 3: most happy when I'm with my family. But when I 416 00:20:15,160 --> 00:20:16,840 Speaker 3: was like a teenager, I went to a school, a 417 00:20:16,840 --> 00:20:19,760 Speaker 3: lovely school I had. I had kids from all the 418 00:20:19,800 --> 00:20:21,760 Speaker 3: different towns and it was a private school, so everyone 419 00:20:21,800 --> 00:20:22,959 Speaker 3: was coming in from different areas. 420 00:20:23,160 --> 00:20:24,600 Speaker 4: I had wonderful teachers. 421 00:20:24,280 --> 00:20:26,240 Speaker 3: I had a great experience there, But on the weekends 422 00:20:26,280 --> 00:20:28,239 Speaker 3: and stuff, it was very social. It was very like 423 00:20:28,400 --> 00:20:30,200 Speaker 3: who's going to get invited? Whose parents are going to 424 00:20:30,280 --> 00:20:34,080 Speaker 3: drive them somewhere? And I found myself feeling like like 425 00:20:34,119 --> 00:20:36,360 Speaker 3: it was a reflection of me if I wasn't included 426 00:20:36,359 --> 00:20:38,320 Speaker 3: and stuff, Oh I should even even though if you 427 00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:40,280 Speaker 3: really asked me, would you prefer to go to it? 428 00:20:40,359 --> 00:20:43,119 Speaker 2: Or would you like no, would you just want to 429 00:20:43,119 --> 00:20:43,480 Speaker 2: be ask? 430 00:20:44,359 --> 00:20:46,560 Speaker 3: Yeah, I just wanted to be And I really felt 431 00:20:46,600 --> 00:20:49,880 Speaker 3: like I was failing myself. And sometimes i'd be embarrassed 432 00:20:49,920 --> 00:20:51,480 Speaker 3: if my parents would say and they weren't saying it 433 00:20:51,480 --> 00:20:53,160 Speaker 3: to be me, but they want you want your kids 434 00:20:53,160 --> 00:20:55,000 Speaker 3: to be social, and they'd say, like, is anything going 435 00:20:55,040 --> 00:20:57,040 Speaker 3: on this weekend? And I would be like, no, I 436 00:20:57,040 --> 00:20:59,280 Speaker 3: think I'm just going to hang with Alexander, my little sister. 437 00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:02,680 Speaker 3: And I think what I would tell myself now, because 438 00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:05,920 Speaker 3: as you get older, those moments are when your whole 439 00:21:05,920 --> 00:21:08,160 Speaker 3: family's together, and this, of course is for people who 440 00:21:08,480 --> 00:21:11,280 Speaker 3: are blessed, and I understand not everyone has that situation, 441 00:21:11,400 --> 00:21:13,800 Speaker 3: but now that I'm older, like when we're all together 442 00:21:13,880 --> 00:21:16,199 Speaker 3: all the siblings and all of our kids and my 443 00:21:16,320 --> 00:21:19,000 Speaker 3: parents are there and we're all like having Thanksgiving or something. 444 00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:22,040 Speaker 3: I would say to myself at sixteen, there's only so 445 00:21:22,160 --> 00:21:24,600 Speaker 3: much time where your entire family is under this roof, 446 00:21:24,640 --> 00:21:28,760 Speaker 3: and it's so incredibly special, and it's okay that you 447 00:21:28,920 --> 00:21:30,960 Speaker 3: love that and that that's where you want to be. 448 00:21:31,160 --> 00:21:31,680 Speaker 4: Just be there. 449 00:21:31,760 --> 00:21:35,520 Speaker 3: Don't feel like, don't be half there and half worrying 450 00:21:35,520 --> 00:21:36,840 Speaker 3: about what everyone else is doing. 451 00:21:37,119 --> 00:21:38,040 Speaker 2: That's so beautiful. 452 00:21:38,280 --> 00:21:40,600 Speaker 1: I feel like teenagers are always one foot out the door. 453 00:21:40,680 --> 00:21:42,840 Speaker 1: But if you enjoy being with your family, I mean, 454 00:21:42,880 --> 00:21:44,399 Speaker 1: I'm sure they were thrilled to have you. 455 00:21:44,560 --> 00:21:47,640 Speaker 2: It's yeah, you know again. My oldest is fourteen. 456 00:21:48,240 --> 00:21:50,640 Speaker 1: She's still home a lot, but she's starting to kind 457 00:21:50,640 --> 00:21:51,640 Speaker 1: of be out there, and. 458 00:21:52,920 --> 00:21:55,160 Speaker 2: Yeah, she wants to stay home with us. Please stay 459 00:21:55,200 --> 00:21:59,399 Speaker 2: home with us for sure. So you're recently married, right, yes, 460 00:21:59,440 --> 00:22:00,359 Speaker 2: and how's that going? 461 00:22:00,960 --> 00:22:04,160 Speaker 4: And it's great? I asked daughter, I have a sixteen 462 00:22:04,200 --> 00:22:04,640 Speaker 4: month old. 463 00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:06,760 Speaker 2: Wow, I did not know that. 464 00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:10,800 Speaker 3: Yes, yes, ideally, I don't thank you. I don't talk 465 00:22:10,840 --> 00:22:12,879 Speaker 3: about it that much on my show or anything, just 466 00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:17,800 Speaker 3: because I think when you start putting your personal life 467 00:22:17,840 --> 00:22:20,000 Speaker 3: into this kind of crazy political world that can get 468 00:22:20,080 --> 00:22:22,760 Speaker 3: kind of crazy, but yeah, it's great. 469 00:22:23,680 --> 00:22:26,680 Speaker 4: I was just at a wedding recently and they have those. 470 00:22:26,520 --> 00:22:28,359 Speaker 3: Cards out that are like leave a tip for them, 471 00:22:28,400 --> 00:22:30,960 Speaker 3: and you always feel foolish when you're like, it's like, oh, 472 00:22:30,960 --> 00:22:34,199 Speaker 3: here's my wisdom, please let me let me give you 473 00:22:34,240 --> 00:22:36,920 Speaker 3: all my tips. But one thing I did say, which 474 00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:40,120 Speaker 3: I think is a strength that my husband and I have, 475 00:22:40,320 --> 00:22:44,200 Speaker 3: and of course we have our own stuff, but I said, 476 00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:50,280 Speaker 3: be quick to apologize and quick to forgive, because it's 477 00:22:50,320 --> 00:22:52,840 Speaker 3: such a waste of time, Like people get so caught 478 00:22:52,920 --> 00:22:56,000 Speaker 3: up in I'm going to give someone the silent treatment, 479 00:22:56,000 --> 00:22:57,280 Speaker 3: and my husband and I can't even do it, like 480 00:22:57,320 --> 00:22:58,919 Speaker 3: we end up laughing because it's like we're both in 481 00:22:58,920 --> 00:23:00,439 Speaker 3: the same kitchen and we're going to be mad at 482 00:23:00,480 --> 00:23:03,240 Speaker 3: each other. Like it's so uncomfortable. It's like you feel 483 00:23:03,280 --> 00:23:07,240 Speaker 3: so foolish. And I think that also. One other saying 484 00:23:07,400 --> 00:23:11,240 Speaker 3: for people who get married is that familiarity breeds contempt 485 00:23:11,359 --> 00:23:14,919 Speaker 3: in life, and I think I notice that and I 486 00:23:14,960 --> 00:23:16,760 Speaker 3: noticed this too with myself. It's like you get very 487 00:23:16,840 --> 00:23:18,800 Speaker 3: quick to talk to someone if you're with them all 488 00:23:18,840 --> 00:23:21,000 Speaker 3: the time, in a way you would never. 489 00:23:20,840 --> 00:23:21,360 Speaker 4: Talk to others. 490 00:23:21,359 --> 00:23:21,560 Speaker 1: Sep. 491 00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:23,359 Speaker 4: You get so comfortable. 492 00:23:22,920 --> 00:23:25,960 Speaker 3: Being like hand me that, hey, I need a bottle 493 00:23:26,040 --> 00:23:27,560 Speaker 3: up here, like it's ready for her bottle. 494 00:23:27,600 --> 00:23:31,639 Speaker 2: You get very snitty, right, yeah, snippy that's a good word. 495 00:23:31,760 --> 00:23:34,840 Speaker 3: Yeah, And so I try now to remind myself, like, 496 00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:36,880 Speaker 3: would you talk to anyone this is the person who 497 00:23:36,880 --> 00:23:38,520 Speaker 3: helps you so much in life and who you love 498 00:23:38,560 --> 00:23:41,160 Speaker 3: so much, like, treat them that way, don't treat them 499 00:23:41,240 --> 00:23:44,640 Speaker 3: like like you can because of course, in some ways 500 00:23:44,680 --> 00:23:46,439 Speaker 3: it's nice to drop the veil that you have when 501 00:23:46,480 --> 00:23:50,960 Speaker 3: you're out and about, but keep that level of politeness 502 00:23:50,960 --> 00:23:53,160 Speaker 3: and kindness to the present you're with time. It goes 503 00:23:53,160 --> 00:23:54,040 Speaker 3: a long way, I think. 504 00:23:54,280 --> 00:23:54,919 Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree. 505 00:23:54,960 --> 00:23:57,520 Speaker 1: I think that people think they can be their authentic 506 00:23:57,600 --> 00:24:00,399 Speaker 1: selves with their spouse. But what if you're authentic self 507 00:24:00,520 --> 00:24:04,480 Speaker 1: was also polite and kind That maybe is what you 508 00:24:04,480 --> 00:24:06,600 Speaker 1: should work on more than anything else, Like it's not 509 00:24:06,640 --> 00:24:10,160 Speaker 1: even the acting or you know, what if the authentic 510 00:24:10,200 --> 00:24:12,720 Speaker 1: self that you are to your family, to your friends, 511 00:24:12,800 --> 00:24:17,439 Speaker 1: to your spouse to your kids is somebody who is 512 00:24:17,520 --> 00:24:21,359 Speaker 1: measured and doesn't yell and all of that. You know, 513 00:24:21,400 --> 00:24:23,360 Speaker 1: I work on it, and I'm not saying it's an 514 00:24:23,400 --> 00:24:26,359 Speaker 1: easy feat. We definitely yell at the kids a lot. 515 00:24:26,920 --> 00:24:28,719 Speaker 4: Yeah. No, And you know what. The other thing is, 516 00:24:28,720 --> 00:24:29,800 Speaker 4: Carol again here. 517 00:24:29,800 --> 00:24:30,600 Speaker 3: I'm like, here's my. 518 00:24:30,760 --> 00:24:33,520 Speaker 2: Tell me everything, this is what it's all about. 519 00:24:34,000 --> 00:24:39,399 Speaker 3: I find that I am super like I said, I 520 00:24:39,480 --> 00:24:40,320 Speaker 3: love to talk. 521 00:24:40,600 --> 00:24:41,320 Speaker 4: I love to talk. 522 00:24:41,320 --> 00:24:43,640 Speaker 3: I have to stop myself sometimes when someone else is talking, 523 00:24:43,640 --> 00:24:45,600 Speaker 3: I catch myself like I'm looking in the video right now? 524 00:24:45,600 --> 00:24:46,840 Speaker 4: Am I ready to go? 525 00:24:47,280 --> 00:24:49,920 Speaker 3: Sometimes when my husband comes to me and he's trying 526 00:24:49,920 --> 00:24:53,000 Speaker 3: to work through something, I don't have the same level 527 00:24:53,000 --> 00:24:56,600 Speaker 3: of patience that he has for me. And when I 528 00:24:56,640 --> 00:24:59,800 Speaker 3: think about all of the scenarios that I'm I mean 529 00:24:59,840 --> 00:25:01,840 Speaker 3: like when I was pregnant, I was going through, well, 530 00:25:01,840 --> 00:25:02,520 Speaker 3: what if this happens? 531 00:25:02,560 --> 00:25:03,080 Speaker 4: What if that happens? 532 00:25:03,119 --> 00:25:04,159 Speaker 3: And he looked at me at one point and it 533 00:25:04,200 --> 00:25:05,720 Speaker 3: was so helpful. He said, what if we just try 534 00:25:05,760 --> 00:25:08,359 Speaker 3: to have dinner tonight? What if we just and then 535 00:25:08,400 --> 00:25:09,520 Speaker 3: we worry about this tomorrow. 536 00:25:09,800 --> 00:25:09,919 Speaker 1: Right. 537 00:25:09,920 --> 00:25:12,720 Speaker 3: And when he comes to me and he wants to 538 00:25:12,760 --> 00:25:14,680 Speaker 3: be vulnerable in one way or another, he's a very 539 00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:17,800 Speaker 3: stoic person, and he's very quiet, and he keeps a 540 00:25:17,800 --> 00:25:21,480 Speaker 3: lot in I find myself it's easy to dismiss it, 541 00:25:21,560 --> 00:25:22,920 Speaker 3: like when you're not used to hearing it. 542 00:25:22,800 --> 00:25:25,320 Speaker 4: You're like, oh please, oh please, don't do that. 543 00:25:25,320 --> 00:25:27,800 Speaker 3: That's what I would say to marrying people because if 544 00:25:27,840 --> 00:25:29,600 Speaker 3: someone's feeling something, and I don't want to sound too 545 00:25:29,640 --> 00:25:32,159 Speaker 3: woo wo, but if someone's feeling something, it's real to 546 00:25:32,200 --> 00:25:35,960 Speaker 3: them and they deserve to have to be heard. So 547 00:25:37,080 --> 00:25:39,120 Speaker 3: it's if you're with someone, and I think a lot 548 00:25:39,440 --> 00:25:41,600 Speaker 3: some women end up like me, where you're with someone 549 00:25:41,680 --> 00:25:44,399 Speaker 3: who you're the talker and they're maybe not necessarily as well. 550 00:25:44,880 --> 00:25:48,080 Speaker 3: I've been there when they do talk, it's like, yeah, 551 00:25:48,119 --> 00:25:48,800 Speaker 3: give them time. 552 00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:50,960 Speaker 2: That's I really like. 553 00:25:51,280 --> 00:25:54,000 Speaker 1: And so it's funny because my last question for you, 554 00:25:54,040 --> 00:25:55,879 Speaker 1: and I feel like this conversation could go on for 555 00:25:55,920 --> 00:25:58,440 Speaker 1: a long time and I love talking to But last 556 00:25:58,520 --> 00:26:00,639 Speaker 1: question I ask all my guests is leave us with 557 00:26:00,760 --> 00:26:02,880 Speaker 1: your best tip for better living. I feel like you've 558 00:26:02,920 --> 00:26:05,240 Speaker 1: given us so much, but do you have a best 559 00:26:05,240 --> 00:26:07,760 Speaker 1: tip for my listeners on how they can improve their lives? 560 00:26:08,359 --> 00:26:10,240 Speaker 3: I do, and it kind of ties in with what 561 00:26:10,280 --> 00:26:14,520 Speaker 3: I was saying before about the worrying thing. I think 562 00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:16,639 Speaker 3: one time someone said to me, if you can name it, 563 00:26:16,680 --> 00:26:19,159 Speaker 3: you can tame it, and it really stuck with me 564 00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:23,800 Speaker 3: because I thought, sometimes you have an angst or anxiety 565 00:26:23,960 --> 00:26:26,920 Speaker 3: or you know, and sometimes, like I said, it's something big, 566 00:26:26,960 --> 00:26:29,040 Speaker 3: it's someone sick or something, and so I'm not really 567 00:26:29,119 --> 00:26:32,320 Speaker 3: talking about those scenarios, but oftentimes I'll find myself in 568 00:26:32,520 --> 00:26:33,879 Speaker 3: kind of a crummy mood or whatever. 569 00:26:34,000 --> 00:26:35,840 Speaker 4: I'm like, oh, I got so much going on. 570 00:26:36,440 --> 00:26:38,960 Speaker 3: And then if I really try to verbalize it, or 571 00:26:38,960 --> 00:26:40,560 Speaker 3: I sit down with someone like my husband, or I 572 00:26:40,600 --> 00:26:41,880 Speaker 3: sit down with a piece of paper and a pen, 573 00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:44,480 Speaker 3: and I'm like, what is it right now that's stressing 574 00:26:44,520 --> 00:26:47,359 Speaker 3: me out? Like what is it that I'm that's preventing 575 00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:50,640 Speaker 3: me from having a little bit of a lighter, happier outlook. 576 00:26:51,200 --> 00:26:55,240 Speaker 3: And if I can verbalize it, oftentimes. 577 00:26:54,400 --> 00:26:57,680 Speaker 4: It's not that as big as I think. 578 00:26:57,720 --> 00:26:59,560 Speaker 3: It's like, well, I'm stressed out because I haven't paid 579 00:26:59,560 --> 00:27:01,280 Speaker 3: my current yet. Okay, So when you get to work 580 00:27:01,440 --> 00:27:07,520 Speaker 3: da blogging bit like or and I know, everything has different, 581 00:27:07,560 --> 00:27:10,800 Speaker 3: you know, things for people, but it's like you'll if 582 00:27:10,840 --> 00:27:14,600 Speaker 3: you don't verbalize them or write them down in a 583 00:27:14,640 --> 00:27:17,200 Speaker 3: list or really look at it, you can end up 584 00:27:17,280 --> 00:27:19,000 Speaker 3: they can end up overtaking you, and you end up 585 00:27:19,040 --> 00:27:22,000 Speaker 3: feeling like you're so overwhelmed, and it's like, well, let's 586 00:27:22,000 --> 00:27:24,080 Speaker 3: cross off and then to be able to look at 587 00:27:24,080 --> 00:27:26,840 Speaker 3: that and separate what are the things that I can 588 00:27:26,840 --> 00:27:30,119 Speaker 3: put on a list here and maybe get done. My 589 00:27:30,200 --> 00:27:32,560 Speaker 3: house is messy. That's something for me that I'm always like, 590 00:27:32,560 --> 00:27:34,320 Speaker 3: I need to clea in a house. Okay, well carve 591 00:27:34,359 --> 00:27:36,200 Speaker 3: out some time clean your house, cross it off list, 592 00:27:36,400 --> 00:27:38,040 Speaker 3: and then there's a list of things that you'll put 593 00:27:38,080 --> 00:27:40,160 Speaker 3: down and you'll go there's nothing I can do about this. 594 00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:42,479 Speaker 4: I'm worried about this person. 595 00:27:42,560 --> 00:27:45,960 Speaker 3: I'm worried about, like we said, an election, I'm worried 596 00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:50,320 Speaker 3: about losing someone I love. That's stuff where to look 597 00:27:50,320 --> 00:27:53,000 Speaker 3: at it and say, I'm not crossing that off the list, 598 00:27:53,080 --> 00:27:54,959 Speaker 3: and there's no amount of worrying that's going to make 599 00:27:54,960 --> 00:27:57,960 Speaker 3: this better. So living with that, I think, being able 600 00:27:58,000 --> 00:28:02,120 Speaker 3: to look at things and really fagure out what am 601 00:28:02,119 --> 00:28:04,560 Speaker 3: I capable of changing and what do I have to 602 00:28:04,600 --> 00:28:07,800 Speaker 3: make some sort of peace with can kind of let 603 00:28:07,840 --> 00:28:10,359 Speaker 3: you live a little bit of a lighter existence. 604 00:28:10,720 --> 00:28:11,199 Speaker 2: I love that. 605 00:28:11,359 --> 00:28:14,520 Speaker 1: I also have to say that you, throughout this conversation 606 00:28:14,680 --> 00:28:18,680 Speaker 1: have referenced people giving you advice and you taking that advice. 607 00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:21,520 Speaker 1: I think that is huge, Like the fact a lot 608 00:28:21,520 --> 00:28:24,560 Speaker 1: of people get advice, right, but not that many people 609 00:28:24,640 --> 00:28:27,280 Speaker 1: internalize it and take it and then do something with it. 610 00:28:27,800 --> 00:28:30,800 Speaker 1: I think that's a real triumph that you do do that. 611 00:28:31,640 --> 00:28:33,800 Speaker 1: You had a couple of them in this conversation, So 612 00:28:34,640 --> 00:28:35,919 Speaker 1: it's awesome. 613 00:28:35,880 --> 00:28:37,720 Speaker 4: Love, Carol. Can I add one thing in? 614 00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:41,000 Speaker 3: Yeah, because it's so funny you say that, because when 615 00:28:41,000 --> 00:28:43,520 Speaker 3: I was thinking about I was thinking about this morning, 616 00:28:43,560 --> 00:28:46,160 Speaker 3: like what would be a tip for people, and that 617 00:28:46,280 --> 00:28:48,200 Speaker 3: was actually going to be one I gave was. 618 00:28:49,680 --> 00:28:51,800 Speaker 4: If you trust the person. 619 00:28:52,480 --> 00:28:54,360 Speaker 3: And I'll just give a quick example because I think 620 00:28:54,360 --> 00:29:00,440 Speaker 3: this is My younger sister is absolutely spectacular. She's and 621 00:29:00,480 --> 00:29:02,880 Speaker 3: she's funny, and she has a lot of qualities that 622 00:29:03,120 --> 00:29:06,200 Speaker 3: I'm envious of, Like she's very sure of herself, and 623 00:29:06,240 --> 00:29:08,440 Speaker 3: she makes decisions and she does all these things, and 624 00:29:08,480 --> 00:29:12,120 Speaker 3: so she's wonderful. My mother loves us all so so 625 00:29:12,240 --> 00:29:14,040 Speaker 3: much and only wants to see the best for us. 626 00:29:14,240 --> 00:29:17,520 Speaker 3: My mom gives us advice, and I am very open 627 00:29:17,520 --> 00:29:19,080 Speaker 3: to advice. And so if my mom says to me, 628 00:29:19,280 --> 00:29:21,480 Speaker 3: you know who you should call, You should call my 629 00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:22,600 Speaker 3: friend because her. 630 00:29:22,600 --> 00:29:23,880 Speaker 4: Blah blah blah, I'll go. 631 00:29:24,440 --> 00:29:26,320 Speaker 3: And when I was little, I pushed back a little bit, 632 00:29:26,600 --> 00:29:28,640 Speaker 3: but now that I'm older, I'll go. Yeah, I'm a 633 00:29:28,680 --> 00:29:30,760 Speaker 3: lot quicker to go. Maybe that's a good idea, Like 634 00:29:31,040 --> 00:29:33,200 Speaker 3: she led me into the right direction this far. My 635 00:29:33,280 --> 00:29:36,040 Speaker 3: sister is a lot more resistant to advice. And I'm 636 00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:39,240 Speaker 3: saying it just because it's an interesting dynamic. And if 637 00:29:39,240 --> 00:29:41,840 Speaker 3: you can, if you trust the source of the advice 638 00:29:42,400 --> 00:29:45,640 Speaker 3: and you think they have what's best for you in mind, right, 639 00:29:46,480 --> 00:29:48,680 Speaker 3: try it out, like who maybe it will work. 640 00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:50,719 Speaker 2: Yeah, It's just it's a tough thing to do. 641 00:29:50,800 --> 00:29:53,480 Speaker 1: I think a lot of people are like, hear the advice, no, 642 00:29:53,560 --> 00:29:56,160 Speaker 1: it's good for them, but don't quite implement it. 643 00:29:56,200 --> 00:29:58,160 Speaker 2: I mean we're all guilty of it. I yes, for sure, 644 00:29:58,600 --> 00:29:59,880 Speaker 2: for sure, I'm guilty of it. 645 00:30:00,320 --> 00:30:02,360 Speaker 1: It's like when I have like back pain and my 646 00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:05,080 Speaker 1: brother's like every day, like, you should go swim, it's 647 00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:05,760 Speaker 1: very good for. 648 00:30:05,720 --> 00:30:08,520 Speaker 2: Back pain, and I'm like, yes, I know, but I'm 649 00:30:08,520 --> 00:30:11,360 Speaker 2: not going to go do that. So thank you for 650 00:30:11,440 --> 00:30:14,120 Speaker 2: your totally correct advice that I'm not taking. 651 00:30:15,040 --> 00:30:17,320 Speaker 1: So it's hard to do, but I love that you 652 00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:20,720 Speaker 1: do take advice and you end up implementing it in 653 00:30:20,800 --> 00:30:22,400 Speaker 1: all these different ways in your life. 654 00:30:22,400 --> 00:30:25,320 Speaker 2: This has been awesome. She is grace Curly check out 655 00:30:25,320 --> 00:30:28,240 Speaker 2: the Grace Curly Show. Love talking to you, Grace. 656 00:30:28,280 --> 00:30:30,360 Speaker 3: Thank you, Thank you Carol so much. 657 00:30:30,200 --> 00:30:32,720 Speaker 1: Thanks so much for joining us on The Carol Marcowitch Show. 658 00:30:32,800 --> 00:30:35,120 Speaker 1: Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.