1 00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:02,440 Speaker 1: Buggalu, hold on tight, we got it for you. Here 2 00:00:02,480 --> 00:00:06,240 Speaker 1: it is Strawberry letter, Thank you nephew. Subject I'm in 3 00:00:06,360 --> 00:00:09,440 Speaker 1: too deep with this guy. Dear Stephen Shirley. I've been 4 00:00:09,480 --> 00:00:12,480 Speaker 1: seeing a guy for eight months now and our relationship 5 00:00:12,600 --> 00:00:16,560 Speaker 1: is strictly sexual. When we first met, he told me 6 00:00:16,760 --> 00:00:19,840 Speaker 1: that he has a girlfriend and that he lives in 7 00:00:19,880 --> 00:00:23,080 Speaker 1: another state, that he had no plans to break up 8 00:00:23,120 --> 00:00:25,919 Speaker 1: with her, but she's still but she can't fulfill his 9 00:00:26,040 --> 00:00:28,600 Speaker 1: needs when she's so far away. When we first met 10 00:00:28,600 --> 00:00:30,160 Speaker 1: at a club, and I would run into him at 11 00:00:30,160 --> 00:00:33,960 Speaker 1: local parties, so we were bound to hook up sooner 12 00:00:34,040 --> 00:00:38,479 Speaker 1: or later. We have sex often, and it's really good sex. 13 00:00:38,640 --> 00:00:41,559 Speaker 1: I am the one who satisfies his sexual needs and 14 00:00:41,640 --> 00:00:44,960 Speaker 1: desires while his girlfriend is away. I have a problem, though, 15 00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:47,960 Speaker 1: When his girlfriend is in town. I often run into 16 00:00:48,040 --> 00:00:53,000 Speaker 1: my guy and his girlfriend in the club or at parties. 17 00:00:53,080 --> 00:00:55,959 Speaker 1: I have to see him all up on her, dancing 18 00:00:56,040 --> 00:01:00,040 Speaker 1: seductively and giving her public displays of affection right in 19 00:00:59,800 --> 00:01:02,720 Speaker 1: front of me. It's becoming a real problem for me, 20 00:01:03,200 --> 00:01:06,840 Speaker 1: and I have realized that I'm catching feelings for this guy. 21 00:01:07,600 --> 00:01:11,240 Speaker 1: I have started to question myself because his girlfriend is 22 00:01:11,280 --> 00:01:14,680 Speaker 1: pretty and she's a great body, but so do I. 23 00:01:14,680 --> 00:01:17,760 Speaker 1: I am also very well educated, and I could easily 24 00:01:17,800 --> 00:01:21,560 Speaker 1: be any man's prize possession. I recently turned forty, and 25 00:01:21,600 --> 00:01:23,639 Speaker 1: I feel like it's time for me to stop playing 26 00:01:23,640 --> 00:01:26,120 Speaker 1: gangs and get what I deserve. I feel like I 27 00:01:26,240 --> 00:01:29,360 Speaker 1: deserve this guy, and I no longer to desire to 28 00:01:29,440 --> 00:01:32,160 Speaker 1: be his side chick. I have been hinting at it, 29 00:01:32,200 --> 00:01:34,039 Speaker 1: and he tells me that I am a great woman 30 00:01:34,040 --> 00:01:36,440 Speaker 1: and any man would be lucky to have me. So 31 00:01:36,560 --> 00:01:38,280 Speaker 1: should I tell him that I want to be with 32 00:01:38,360 --> 00:01:41,000 Speaker 1: him and give him an ultimatum? Or do you think 33 00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:45,520 Speaker 1: he would just discard me and get another side chick. Yeah, 34 00:01:45,680 --> 00:01:48,160 Speaker 1: everything you said in your letter is true, so you 35 00:01:48,200 --> 00:01:50,800 Speaker 1: already know the answer. I mean even before you wrote 36 00:01:50,840 --> 00:01:54,040 Speaker 1: in yeah, he'll probably just discard you and get someone else, 37 00:01:54,600 --> 00:01:57,400 Speaker 1: because the girlfriend that he has that lives out of 38 00:01:57,440 --> 00:02:00,760 Speaker 1: town is obviously who he wants. But you signed up 39 00:02:00,760 --> 00:02:04,400 Speaker 1: for this. You signed up for this in your second line, 40 00:02:04,560 --> 00:02:08,440 Speaker 1: this relationship is strictly sexual. You said it. You said 41 00:02:08,600 --> 00:02:11,560 Speaker 1: we were bound to hook up sooner or later. We 42 00:02:11,560 --> 00:02:14,880 Speaker 1: were bound to hook up sooner or later. Really, I mean, 43 00:02:15,160 --> 00:02:17,880 Speaker 1: you said you have sex often it's really good sex. 44 00:02:18,200 --> 00:02:20,640 Speaker 1: You're the one who satisfies him. Yeah, you're doing all 45 00:02:20,680 --> 00:02:22,960 Speaker 1: the work. But he was honest with you. He told 46 00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:25,359 Speaker 1: you he had a girlfriend. He told you he had 47 00:02:25,440 --> 00:02:27,600 Speaker 1: no plans to break up with her. He told you, 48 00:02:27,639 --> 00:02:30,079 Speaker 1: and you accepted all of this. I mean, I get it. 49 00:02:30,160 --> 00:02:32,919 Speaker 1: Things changed because guess what, we as women aren't built 50 00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:36,120 Speaker 1: for this. We aren't built like this. But you already 51 00:02:36,280 --> 00:02:40,120 Speaker 1: know the answers. You're pretty, you have a beautiful body, 52 00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:42,640 Speaker 1: you're very well educated, all that. You could easily be 53 00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:46,440 Speaker 1: any man's prize possession. You recently turned forty. It's time 54 00:02:46,440 --> 00:02:49,480 Speaker 1: for you to stop playing games. Okay, well stop stop. 55 00:02:49,600 --> 00:02:52,440 Speaker 1: Let this man go on and be with this woman 56 00:02:52,520 --> 00:02:56,080 Speaker 1: that he's had before you, since and after you, and 57 00:02:56,160 --> 00:03:00,239 Speaker 1: you go on at forty and get your own man. Okay, 58 00:03:00,560 --> 00:03:03,080 Speaker 1: get your own man. You just like you caught feelings 59 00:03:03,080 --> 00:03:05,360 Speaker 1: for him because you were being so sexual and everything 60 00:03:05,360 --> 00:03:08,280 Speaker 1: for him, you could catch feelings for someone else. Okay, 61 00:03:08,400 --> 00:03:11,480 Speaker 1: So get yourself together, raise your self esteem, and get 62 00:03:11,480 --> 00:03:15,359 Speaker 1: what you truly deserve. You already know this, Steve. This 63 00:03:15,440 --> 00:03:20,040 Speaker 1: is a letter about a woman who's kidding herself. And 64 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:22,560 Speaker 1: you know I read these letters and I read them 65 00:03:22,560 --> 00:03:25,120 Speaker 1: a little bit differently. I just don't like when a 66 00:03:25,160 --> 00:03:29,680 Speaker 1: woman lies. I just don't like that. And Sister, I 67 00:03:29,760 --> 00:03:32,080 Speaker 1: hate to tell you this, but if you would just 68 00:03:32,240 --> 00:03:36,400 Speaker 1: stop lying, you could be okay. I've been seeing a 69 00:03:36,440 --> 00:03:40,040 Speaker 1: guy's faith most now in our relationship is strictly sexual. 70 00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:45,760 Speaker 1: That's a lie. It's a lie. It's been stopped being 71 00:03:45,800 --> 00:03:50,600 Speaker 1: strictly sexual for you quite some time ago. That's not true. 72 00:03:51,360 --> 00:03:54,080 Speaker 1: When we first met, he told me he had a 73 00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:57,119 Speaker 1: girlfriend that lives in another state and he had no 74 00:03:57,320 --> 00:04:01,280 Speaker 1: plans on breaking up with her. He told you that, 75 00:04:02,560 --> 00:04:06,120 Speaker 1: but she can't fulfill his needs when she's far away. 76 00:04:06,360 --> 00:04:10,040 Speaker 1: All he said was, I'd be wanting to have sex 77 00:04:10,160 --> 00:04:15,040 Speaker 1: sometimes and she ain't here to get to me. But 78 00:04:15,200 --> 00:04:21,440 Speaker 1: I have no intention of breaking up with her. Then 79 00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:24,800 Speaker 1: she tries to backtrack. We first met at a club, 80 00:04:25,080 --> 00:04:27,680 Speaker 1: and I would run into him at local parties, so 81 00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:32,360 Speaker 1: we were bound to hook up sooner or later? Why? Why? 82 00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:35,880 Speaker 1: What that means I'd ran up into a lot of people. 83 00:04:35,960 --> 00:04:42,039 Speaker 1: Wasn't no bound to nothing? No, you wanted this from 84 00:04:42,480 --> 00:04:46,359 Speaker 1: several events. You've looked over at him, and you made 85 00:04:46,400 --> 00:04:48,839 Speaker 1: it up in your mind that you wanted him. What 86 00:04:48,960 --> 00:04:51,000 Speaker 1: you mean we was bound to hook up sooner later. 87 00:04:51,160 --> 00:04:53,440 Speaker 1: You know how many times you see somebody all the time, 88 00:04:53,720 --> 00:04:56,320 Speaker 1: how many people see somebody at work that's cute, but 89 00:04:56,400 --> 00:04:59,680 Speaker 1: it ain't bound to be a hook up. We have 90 00:05:00,040 --> 00:05:03,360 Speaker 1: sex often, and it's really good sex. I'm the one 91 00:05:03,400 --> 00:05:07,479 Speaker 1: who satisfies his sexual needs and desires while his girlfriend 92 00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:13,120 Speaker 1: is away. Excuse me girlfriend, his girlfriend, the one he 93 00:05:13,200 --> 00:05:15,240 Speaker 1: told you that he has no plans of breaking up with. 94 00:05:15,839 --> 00:05:18,880 Speaker 1: I'm the one who satisfies his sexual needs and desires 95 00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:21,560 Speaker 1: when his girlfriend was This one gets women into trouble. 96 00:05:22,320 --> 00:05:27,000 Speaker 1: See women, you suught your such nurturers. You oftentimes think 97 00:05:27,400 --> 00:05:32,040 Speaker 1: that I can fix it. So since you have this 98 00:05:32,240 --> 00:05:35,640 Speaker 1: problem with this woman being away so long and she 99 00:05:35,720 --> 00:05:39,599 Speaker 1: can't supply your needs, I tell you what. I'm gonna 100 00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:44,480 Speaker 1: supply your needs. I got you while she is away. 101 00:05:45,520 --> 00:05:48,560 Speaker 1: Now I got a problem though, because when his girlfriend 102 00:05:48,680 --> 00:05:51,440 Speaker 1: is in town, I often run into my guy and 103 00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:54,279 Speaker 1: his girlfriend in the club or at parties. Is what 104 00:05:54,440 --> 00:06:00,720 Speaker 1: kind of small ass town is this a little bit 105 00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:04,000 Speaker 1: of his time? I have to see him all up 106 00:06:04,040 --> 00:06:07,279 Speaker 1: on her, dancing seductively and giving her public displays on 107 00:06:07,320 --> 00:06:10,760 Speaker 1: affection right in front of me. It's his girlfrid that 108 00:06:10,920 --> 00:06:13,920 Speaker 1: he has no intentions of breaking up with Why are 109 00:06:13,920 --> 00:06:16,840 Speaker 1: you forgetting this here? It's supposed to be in front 110 00:06:16,880 --> 00:06:19,520 Speaker 1: of you because he ain't having an affan with you. 111 00:06:19,640 --> 00:06:25,680 Speaker 1: He told us to the girl. Hang on, Steve right here, Yeah, 112 00:06:25,800 --> 00:06:30,800 Speaker 1: I told you that. Steve's response. Let's recap today's Strawberry 113 00:06:30,839 --> 00:06:34,000 Speaker 1: Letters subject I'm in too deep with this guy. This 114 00:06:34,480 --> 00:06:37,200 Speaker 1: lady been seeing this guy for eight months. Lied to 115 00:06:37,279 --> 00:06:39,680 Speaker 1: us right in the first sentence said our relationship is 116 00:06:39,720 --> 00:06:43,760 Speaker 1: strictly sexual. Nothing after this letter says it's strictly sexual. 117 00:06:44,880 --> 00:06:47,159 Speaker 1: You got a girlfriend living in another state, has no 118 00:06:47,279 --> 00:06:49,880 Speaker 1: plans of breaking up with her. She can't fulfill his 119 00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:52,680 Speaker 1: needs when she's so far away. So we met at 120 00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:54,760 Speaker 1: a club and I run up into him at local party. 121 00:06:54,839 --> 00:06:56,800 Speaker 1: So we was bound the hook up sooner or later. 122 00:06:57,000 --> 00:07:02,120 Speaker 1: What Who makes that damn statement? I keep seeing him 123 00:07:02,120 --> 00:07:05,200 Speaker 1: and Wayne must be a sign from the Lord. You've 124 00:07:05,240 --> 00:07:10,080 Speaker 1: seen everybody in that town though, Yeah, every time I 125 00:07:10,120 --> 00:07:11,960 Speaker 1: go down to this Chick fil A, I see the 126 00:07:12,080 --> 00:07:15,760 Speaker 1: same people down there. Ain't never thought, well they in't 127 00:07:15,800 --> 00:07:23,360 Speaker 1: here again? Must be moting chicken. I have a problem though, 128 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:26,200 Speaker 1: when his girlfriend is in town. I run into the 129 00:07:26,240 --> 00:07:29,320 Speaker 1: guy and his girlfriend in the club at parties, I 130 00:07:29,360 --> 00:07:32,200 Speaker 1: got to see him all up on her dances seductively 131 00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:35,080 Speaker 1: and giving her public displays of affection right in front 132 00:07:35,080 --> 00:07:39,520 Speaker 1: of me. That's cause that's caused you knew the rules. 133 00:07:40,560 --> 00:07:44,240 Speaker 1: You knew the rules from the beginning. He told you 134 00:07:44,400 --> 00:07:49,280 Speaker 1: he has no intentions of breaking up with her. And 135 00:07:49,400 --> 00:07:52,400 Speaker 1: when she in town, he ain't in your face because 136 00:07:52,400 --> 00:07:55,760 Speaker 1: she in town supplying his needs. You supplying when she 137 00:07:55,800 --> 00:07:58,840 Speaker 1: ain't there. That's become a real problem for me because 138 00:07:58,880 --> 00:08:01,600 Speaker 1: I have realized that I'm catching feelings for this guy. 139 00:08:01,880 --> 00:08:07,280 Speaker 1: Another lie, another lie, I'm catching feelings for this guy. 140 00:08:07,480 --> 00:08:12,040 Speaker 1: No you called them, Yeah, you've ben't had him, You've 141 00:08:12,040 --> 00:08:16,600 Speaker 1: ben had him. I have started to question myself because 142 00:08:16,600 --> 00:08:19,600 Speaker 1: his girlfriend is pretty and she has a great body, 143 00:08:19,920 --> 00:08:26,760 Speaker 1: But so do I. Okay, Well, I'm also very well educated, 144 00:08:26,840 --> 00:08:30,200 Speaker 1: and I could here the line, y'all, I'm also very 145 00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:36,720 Speaker 1: well educated, and I could easily be any man's prize possession. Well, 146 00:08:37,559 --> 00:08:42,800 Speaker 1: you know why you're not. First of all, you are 147 00:08:43,200 --> 00:08:51,120 Speaker 1: any man's prize possession. You are you are, you are 148 00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:56,280 Speaker 1: his prize other possession, And you know why you're not 149 00:08:57,360 --> 00:09:01,320 Speaker 1: the one the number one be you don't act like 150 00:09:01,400 --> 00:09:05,760 Speaker 1: a number one. See you act like a number two. 151 00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:10,360 Speaker 1: See when you act like a number two, then you 152 00:09:10,520 --> 00:09:14,520 Speaker 1: gonna be a number two. A woman only gets to 153 00:09:14,600 --> 00:09:19,040 Speaker 1: be number one when she starts acting and behaving as 154 00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:23,000 Speaker 1: a number one. As long as you behave and act 155 00:09:23,080 --> 00:09:29,160 Speaker 1: as a number two, So shall it be? He told 156 00:09:29,360 --> 00:09:35,000 Speaker 1: you he had no intentions of leaving his girlfred. You said, cool, 157 00:09:36,000 --> 00:09:39,840 Speaker 1: you can have some of this anyway while she ain't here. Well, 158 00:09:39,920 --> 00:09:43,080 Speaker 1: guess what, he still ain't leaving, honey, keep bringing other 159 00:09:43,160 --> 00:09:48,400 Speaker 1: parties and they dancing all seductively in your face. You're 160 00:09:48,559 --> 00:09:52,040 Speaker 1: number two because you act like number two. The only 161 00:09:52,040 --> 00:09:54,520 Speaker 1: way to be number one is you behave and act 162 00:09:54,559 --> 00:09:58,160 Speaker 1: like number one? Am I being clear? Ladies? Can I 163 00:09:58,240 --> 00:10:03,040 Speaker 1: be clearity you? First of all, you're getting what you 164 00:10:03,160 --> 00:10:08,719 Speaker 1: deserve because you're getting exactly what you wanted. You said 165 00:10:09,480 --> 00:10:12,120 Speaker 1: we was bound to hook up sooner or later. I 166 00:10:12,200 --> 00:10:15,640 Speaker 1: feel like I deserve this guy, and I no longer 167 00:10:15,760 --> 00:10:19,880 Speaker 1: desire to be his side chick. That's true, those are 168 00:10:19,880 --> 00:10:22,800 Speaker 1: probably real feelings you have it you no longer desire 169 00:10:22,840 --> 00:10:25,640 Speaker 1: to be his side chick. But if he don't want 170 00:10:25,679 --> 00:10:30,680 Speaker 1: you as the number one, what do we have hill. See, ladies, 171 00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:33,440 Speaker 1: here we go. You can want to want a man 172 00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:35,680 Speaker 1: to be your man, but if he don't want you 173 00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:39,240 Speaker 1: to be his girl, what we got him? We just 174 00:10:39,320 --> 00:10:42,240 Speaker 1: got you wanting something that he told you you couldn't 175 00:10:42,280 --> 00:10:48,000 Speaker 1: have in the beginning. I have been hinting at it, 176 00:10:48,360 --> 00:10:51,600 Speaker 1: and he tells me that I'm a great woman and 177 00:10:51,760 --> 00:10:54,680 Speaker 1: any man would be lucky to have me. So should 178 00:10:54,720 --> 00:10:56,640 Speaker 1: I tell him that I want to be with him 179 00:10:56,679 --> 00:11:02,040 Speaker 1: and give him an ultimatum? Yes, yes, that's exactly what 180 00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:05,680 Speaker 1: you should do. You should because he just said you 181 00:11:05,760 --> 00:11:09,360 Speaker 1: a great woman and any man would be lucky to 182 00:11:09,440 --> 00:11:12,320 Speaker 1: have you. So should I tell him I want to 183 00:11:12,360 --> 00:11:15,600 Speaker 1: be with him and give him an ultimatum? Yes, you 184 00:11:15,640 --> 00:11:20,280 Speaker 1: should do exactly that. It's time you exactly right, It's 185 00:11:20,320 --> 00:11:22,319 Speaker 1: time to go on and put it out there on 186 00:11:22,360 --> 00:11:24,520 Speaker 1: the life. You should say this to him so you 187 00:11:24,520 --> 00:11:27,719 Speaker 1: can find out the truth and what he told your an. 188 00:11:28,920 --> 00:11:32,760 Speaker 1: It's what he meant in the beginning, and you would 189 00:11:32,880 --> 00:11:37,520 Speaker 1: be good for any man, any man but him. Right, 190 00:11:37,600 --> 00:11:41,040 Speaker 1: he's taken or do you think he would just discard 191 00:11:41,120 --> 00:11:43,079 Speaker 1: me and get another side? Check? Now, it ain't about 192 00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:47,160 Speaker 1: another side, chick, It's about the chick. He got He 193 00:11:47,320 --> 00:11:49,760 Speaker 1: got you because you signed up for it. All you 194 00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:51,880 Speaker 1: do is not signed up for and you'd never been 195 00:11:51,920 --> 00:11:54,400 Speaker 1: the side chick. And then maybe he'd looked at you 196 00:11:54,480 --> 00:11:57,720 Speaker 1: and went wold, she had number one. Let me look 197 00:11:57,760 --> 00:12:01,080 Speaker 1: into this. But since you bit into number two, number two, 198 00:12:01,080 --> 00:12:04,240 Speaker 1: it is safe at second base. You'll never make it, 199 00:12:06,960 --> 00:12:10,280 Speaker 1: all right, Steve, Good answer, Steve. You can email us 200 00:12:10,320 --> 00:12:13,800 Speaker 1: guys or instagram us your thoughts on today's Strawberry Letter due. 201 00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:17,600 Speaker 1: Also check out the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand. Wow, 202 00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:20,720 Speaker 1: you're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning Show