1
00:00:01,920 --> 00:00:05,399
Speaker 1: Wind Down with Janet Kramer and I'm Heart Radio podcast.

2
00:00:06,680 --> 00:00:09,760
Speaker 1: All right, this Thursday Therapy. We have a doctor Harry

3
00:00:09,800 --> 00:00:11,840
Speaker 1: Cohen coming on and I'm really excited. He's got a

4
00:00:11,840 --> 00:00:14,920
Speaker 1: book called Be the Sun Not the Salt. Let's get

5
00:00:15,000 --> 00:00:18,600
Speaker 1: him on. And then there's a word called heliotropic. Not

6
00:00:18,680 --> 00:00:20,479
Speaker 1: really sure what that is, so let's get him on

7
00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:24,120
Speaker 1: and we'll find out what it is. Hi, Janna, Hi,

8
00:00:25,200 --> 00:00:26,640
Speaker 1: how are you good?

9
00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:28,680
Speaker 2: I think the last time we were supposed to talk,

10
00:00:29,440 --> 00:00:30,480
Speaker 2: you had.

11
00:00:30,360 --> 00:00:33,400
Speaker 1: Something rather I had a baby. I think right, you

12
00:00:33,440 --> 00:00:35,560
Speaker 1: had a baby. Yeah. It was either that or I

13
00:00:35,840 --> 00:00:37,280
Speaker 1: know I had to cancel a few because I was

14
00:00:37,320 --> 00:00:43,000
Speaker 1: having some postpartum Like how are you now? Oh my, now,

15
00:00:43,080 --> 00:00:45,680
Speaker 1: you're so sweet for asking. I am. Yeah, I'm good,

16
00:00:45,800 --> 00:00:50,000
Speaker 1: I feel I feel good. The emotions have obviously been

17
00:00:50,040 --> 00:00:51,839
Speaker 1: all over the place. Do you have kids?

18
00:00:52,240 --> 00:00:55,120
Speaker 2: I have two thirty two year old twin boys.

19
00:00:55,360 --> 00:00:58,160
Speaker 1: Okay, So was postpartum a thing back then?

20
00:00:58,680 --> 00:00:59,000
Speaker 2: Yeah?

21
00:00:59,040 --> 00:01:01,600
Speaker 1: With your wife like it? Did they talk about it

22
00:01:01,680 --> 00:01:02,880
Speaker 1: at all? Or was it?

23
00:01:02,880 --> 00:01:05,120
Speaker 2: It was it was a show because it was a

24
00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:09,360
Speaker 2: section and we were new to parenting and twins and

25
00:01:10,640 --> 00:01:13,040
Speaker 2: it was it was very, very different. Most of it

26
00:01:13,080 --> 00:01:18,360
Speaker 2: was just a fog of trying to deal with two

27
00:01:18,480 --> 00:01:20,080
Speaker 2: little boys, two little babies.

28
00:01:20,959 --> 00:01:21,640
Speaker 1: But you did it.

29
00:01:22,120 --> 00:01:25,959
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm sure they're they're good. You know. It's it's a.

30
00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:28,200
Speaker 1: Journey, Yeah, it is.

31
00:01:28,959 --> 00:01:30,760
Speaker 2: So how old is what's your story?

32
00:01:31,280 --> 00:01:33,640
Speaker 1: So? I have an eight year old almost eight year

33
00:01:33,640 --> 00:01:35,680
Speaker 1: old daughter, and then I have a five year old

34
00:01:35,720 --> 00:01:39,360
Speaker 1: son and now a let's see when this airs. So

35
00:01:39,959 --> 00:01:43,080
Speaker 1: today as we're recording, we're five days before Christmas and

36
00:01:43,120 --> 00:01:48,840
Speaker 1: he is five weeks so, you know, it's it's one

37
00:01:48,840 --> 00:01:52,160
Speaker 1: of those things where I was just out of it

38
00:01:52,240 --> 00:01:55,360
Speaker 1: with my five year old, and so it's kind of

39
00:01:55,440 --> 00:01:59,600
Speaker 1: restarting back up again and again. The hormones started really sensitive.

40
00:01:59,640 --> 00:02:01,920
Speaker 1: I wasper sensitive, and then all of a sudden, I

41
00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:05,600
Speaker 1: think last week I started to just get really agitated,

42
00:02:05,840 --> 00:02:07,840
Speaker 1: and I'm like, I don't even know why I'm agitated.

43
00:02:07,920 --> 00:02:11,520
Speaker 1: I just am agitated at everything that moves. So I

44
00:02:11,639 --> 00:02:14,000
Speaker 1: like went to my therapist and I'm like, I'm so,

45
00:02:14,520 --> 00:02:17,079
Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm normally high strung, but I'm on like

46
00:02:17,600 --> 00:02:20,440
Speaker 1: I've taken high strung pills and I don't know how

47
00:02:20,480 --> 00:02:23,680
Speaker 1: to like calm my nervous system down, you know. And

48
00:02:23,720 --> 00:02:25,400
Speaker 1: it was one of those where I'm like, I just

49
00:02:25,480 --> 00:02:28,480
Speaker 1: feel like I'm going to explode, and anyone I go to,

50
00:02:28,600 --> 00:02:32,640
Speaker 1: I'm like a wrecking ball of just like aggression, and

51
00:02:32,680 --> 00:02:34,480
Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't like, I'm like, I don't want

52
00:02:34,480 --> 00:02:38,400
Speaker 1: to be this way good good. So we're trying to

53
00:02:38,440 --> 00:02:42,720
Speaker 1: figure it out, but have you it's I think it's

54
00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:46,240
Speaker 1: again just trying to figure out where why, Like, Okay,

55
00:02:47,480 --> 00:02:53,280
Speaker 1: I know it's the the emotions and the hormones regulating.

56
00:02:53,680 --> 00:02:57,480
Speaker 1: I also think I again, I love, I'm so happy,

57
00:02:58,040 --> 00:03:01,120
Speaker 1: and I love obviously my baby and all the things.

58
00:03:01,160 --> 00:03:04,000
Speaker 1: But I think a piece of that aggression felt like

59
00:03:04,040 --> 00:03:06,680
Speaker 1: I was trapped again, like oh my gosh, everything is

60
00:03:06,760 --> 00:03:10,600
Speaker 1: around yet again, I'm you know, the schedule and feedings

61
00:03:10,639 --> 00:03:14,160
Speaker 1: and naps, and I don't have help yet, so I

62
00:03:14,240 --> 00:03:16,760
Speaker 1: just felt very I think trapped is the best word

63
00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:19,639
Speaker 1: I can think of when I was trying to explain

64
00:03:19,680 --> 00:03:22,400
Speaker 1: it to her. And I don't ever like the feeling

65
00:03:22,480 --> 00:03:26,320
Speaker 1: of feeling trapped. I get anxious, I lash out. So

66
00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:29,600
Speaker 1: that's where I'm just trying to. Now go, Okay, let

67
00:03:29,600 --> 00:03:31,320
Speaker 1: me find things that are good for me that I

68
00:03:31,360 --> 00:03:34,960
Speaker 1: can go do so I don't feel trapped.

69
00:03:35,400 --> 00:03:36,640
Speaker 2: Did your therapist help you.

70
00:03:37,960 --> 00:03:40,520
Speaker 1: She's the best. I love her, but I'm always open

71
00:03:40,680 --> 00:03:42,960
Speaker 1: to which is why i have this segment because I'm

72
00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:44,080
Speaker 1: always open to learning.

73
00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:47,680
Speaker 2: More So, I have no idea what our agenda is.

74
00:03:47,720 --> 00:03:49,360
Speaker 2: I'm happy to do therapy with you if you like,

75
00:03:49,400 --> 00:03:49,680
Speaker 2: but I.

76
00:03:50,320 --> 00:03:51,960
Speaker 1: Mean, hey, we can have a little dose of this

77
00:03:52,000 --> 00:03:53,320
Speaker 1: and a little dose of that, because I want to

78
00:03:53,320 --> 00:03:55,760
Speaker 1: talk about your book too, and I need to know

79
00:03:55,760 --> 00:03:59,320
Speaker 1: if you're a Michigan fan since you went to Michigan. Duh, okay,

80
00:03:59,320 --> 00:04:02,160
Speaker 1: thank you okay, because I'm like, I know some people

81
00:04:02,160 --> 00:04:05,560
Speaker 1: that go to you know, U of m are like, no, no, no, I.

82
00:04:05,480 --> 00:04:07,800
Speaker 2: Live in I mean, I have two front row seats

83
00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:09,160
Speaker 2: and two second row seats.

84
00:04:09,200 --> 00:04:13,640
Speaker 1: If you ever want to do even don't even say

85
00:04:13,680 --> 00:04:15,480
Speaker 1: that without because I'm like, I will take you up

86
00:04:15,480 --> 00:04:17,360
Speaker 1: on that offer. That's one offer I would take.

87
00:04:17,600 --> 00:04:20,279
Speaker 2: Clear, I don't say anything that I don't mean. And

88
00:04:20,320 --> 00:04:22,240
Speaker 2: when I say I have two front row and two

89
00:04:22,240 --> 00:04:25,840
Speaker 2: second row and I give them away, I don't generally

90
00:04:25,839 --> 00:04:28,799
Speaker 2: don't go to the games. I give them away because

91
00:04:28,800 --> 00:04:31,600
Speaker 2: the experience for people who've never been to the Big House.

92
00:04:31,680 --> 00:04:35,120
Speaker 2: Front row is different and second row is pretty nice.

93
00:04:35,400 --> 00:04:37,640
Speaker 2: And and I'm happy to do that I went to

94
00:04:37,720 --> 00:04:41,400
Speaker 2: restaurant in town, you know, dinners on me plus two

95
00:04:41,480 --> 00:04:44,559
Speaker 2: front row seats, plus an experience at the Big House.

96
00:04:45,040 --> 00:04:46,960
Speaker 2: It's easy for me to do so.

97
00:04:47,640 --> 00:04:49,480
Speaker 1: I've never been to a game ever.

98
00:04:49,920 --> 00:04:53,800
Speaker 2: So so take someone whose mind would be blown and

99
00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:57,800
Speaker 2: you know, and we'll organize it and schedule it a web.

100
00:04:57,920 --> 00:05:01,440
Speaker 2: Pick a good weather month because it's different.

101
00:05:01,600 --> 00:05:05,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know in October. Well, gret I love this podcast.

102
00:05:05,640 --> 00:05:09,279
Speaker 1: This podcast has started out amazing. What a generous offer.

103
00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:09,680
Speaker 1: Thank you.

104
00:05:09,720 --> 00:05:13,600
Speaker 2: I really a curiosity is one of the qualities that

105
00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:15,560
Speaker 2: makes someone heliotropic.

106
00:05:15,720 --> 00:05:18,279
Speaker 1: Gradit okay, and that's what I wanted to When I

107
00:05:18,320 --> 00:05:22,360
Speaker 1: was reading your breakdown, I started to find myself googling, like,

108
00:05:22,400 --> 00:05:25,279
Speaker 1: what is heliotopic? I didn't even I've never even heard

109
00:05:25,279 --> 00:05:25,919
Speaker 1: that word before.

110
00:05:26,040 --> 00:05:29,400
Speaker 2: Well, the world will when when we've done our work,

111
00:05:29,440 --> 00:05:32,200
Speaker 2: the world will know what it means to be heliotropic.

112
00:05:32,279 --> 00:05:33,800
Speaker 2: They'll know what it means to be the sun and

113
00:05:33,880 --> 00:05:38,040
Speaker 2: not the salt. It's not complicated. It is why a

114
00:05:38,080 --> 00:05:42,560
Speaker 2: plant tilts towards the sun. The sun is a source

115
00:05:42,600 --> 00:05:45,279
Speaker 2: of energy, which is why the plant is drawn to it.

116
00:05:45,520 --> 00:05:48,599
Speaker 2: And it turns out that human beings are drawn to

117
00:05:49,279 --> 00:05:53,080
Speaker 2: heliotropic people, people who provide that source of energy for them,

118
00:05:53,480 --> 00:05:57,320
Speaker 2: which is positive, nurturing, good energy, and it comes in

119
00:05:57,360 --> 00:06:01,719
Speaker 2: the form of virtuous behaviors. This is empirical. So when

120
00:06:02,240 --> 00:06:06,520
Speaker 2: people are kind and generous and compassionate and authentic and

121
00:06:06,640 --> 00:06:09,760
Speaker 2: vulnerable and real and all the qualities that we love

122
00:06:09,760 --> 00:06:13,680
Speaker 2: about humans, we're drawn to them like the plant is

123
00:06:13,760 --> 00:06:18,000
Speaker 2: drawn to the sun. Therefore, we want to surround ourselves

124
00:06:18,040 --> 00:06:21,200
Speaker 2: with people like that. We want to be like that,

125
00:06:22,080 --> 00:06:26,120
Speaker 2: and it's nurturing and good for the world period. Conversely,

126
00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:30,520
Speaker 2: don't be a dick, don't be rude, disrespectful, unkind, lash

127
00:06:30,520 --> 00:06:33,360
Speaker 2: out all the ways that human beings can be nasty

128
00:06:33,400 --> 00:06:36,719
Speaker 2: to one another. Don't do that. It's salt on the roots.

129
00:06:37,080 --> 00:06:42,400
Speaker 2: So in a nutshell, that's this whole mindset, which is,

130
00:06:43,120 --> 00:06:46,080
Speaker 2: wait a minute, what you just did. I'm lashing out.

131
00:06:46,160 --> 00:06:48,280
Speaker 2: That's not my best self, that's not who I want

132
00:06:48,320 --> 00:06:51,600
Speaker 2: to be. Good. That salt on other people's roots makes

133
00:06:51,640 --> 00:06:54,719
Speaker 2: them feel horrible, makes you feel horrible too. I want

134
00:06:54,760 --> 00:06:57,520
Speaker 2: to be the good person that I know that I

135
00:06:57,600 --> 00:07:01,200
Speaker 2: am great. Be that way. Find your way back to

136
00:07:01,279 --> 00:07:05,240
Speaker 2: that way of being. It's not complicated me being generous

137
00:07:05,279 --> 00:07:09,320
Speaker 2: to you is easy. You know, when you give somebody

138
00:07:09,320 --> 00:07:12,880
Speaker 2: a buck, you know, you give tip a server or something,

139
00:07:13,080 --> 00:07:16,280
Speaker 2: you're being generous. It's easy. I can be generous. Anybody

140
00:07:16,280 --> 00:07:18,480
Speaker 2: can be. I'm not looking for a metal. I'm just

141
00:07:18,560 --> 00:07:21,840
Speaker 2: saying that practicing the virtuous behaviors that we love about

142
00:07:21,880 --> 00:07:25,320
Speaker 2: humans makes us feel good in the world. Feel good, right,

143
00:07:25,720 --> 00:07:25,920
Speaker 2: you know?

144
00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:29,240
Speaker 1: I mean I completely agree with that. And so the

145
00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:33,280
Speaker 1: book that you wrote is it do you talk a lot?

146
00:07:33,320 --> 00:07:36,000
Speaker 1: I mean obviously that the helio how do you say heliotropic?

147
00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:36,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, helio?

148
00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:40,360
Speaker 1: True? That is that? Is that a new words? Did

149
00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:42,040
Speaker 1: you come up with that? Word? Is that has always

150
00:07:42,040 --> 00:07:43,880
Speaker 1: been there? I'm like, why why am I just hearing

151
00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:46,320
Speaker 1: it now? Because I've heard all the other phrases and words.

152
00:07:46,520 --> 00:07:46,800
Speaker 1: I know.

153
00:07:47,960 --> 00:07:51,280
Speaker 2: Professor Kim Cameron, he wrote one of the endorsements on

154
00:07:51,320 --> 00:07:54,720
Speaker 2: the back. We've done a podcast with people who are

155
00:07:54,840 --> 00:07:57,760
Speaker 2: heliotropic who want to be better people. He was one

156
00:07:57,800 --> 00:08:00,200
Speaker 2: of our first guests and he coined the expression. And

157
00:08:00,520 --> 00:08:03,880
Speaker 2: he's a Ross Business School, Michigan Business School professor, and

158
00:08:03,920 --> 00:08:07,920
Speaker 2: he researched positive energizers and corporations and what is it

159
00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:11,520
Speaker 2: about these people that make corporations more successful these leaders.

160
00:08:12,520 --> 00:08:16,280
Speaker 2: It's what he coined the expression heliotropic positive energizer. So

161
00:08:16,640 --> 00:08:20,560
Speaker 2: I stole it from him with his blessing and popularizing

162
00:08:20,600 --> 00:08:23,040
Speaker 2: it in the form of be the sun. Be like

163
00:08:23,160 --> 00:08:26,520
Speaker 2: the sun as opposed to the salt. So that's where

164
00:08:26,520 --> 00:08:30,320
Speaker 2: it comes from. But if you look up heliotropic, if

165
00:08:30,360 --> 00:08:36,400
Speaker 2: you know chet gpt it or Wikipedia, it'll describe qualities

166
00:08:36,440 --> 00:08:38,720
Speaker 2: of sunlight uplifting.

167
00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:53,760
Speaker 1: Why do you think most people go to the salt

168
00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:55,280
Speaker 1: of people as opposed.

169
00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:59,160
Speaker 2: To There's a lot of reasons for it. We're wired

170
00:08:59,200 --> 00:09:03,360
Speaker 2: and geared to see the glass half empty. When a

171
00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:06,080
Speaker 2: branch snaps in the forest, we don't think it's a

172
00:09:06,080 --> 00:09:10,880
Speaker 2: good thing. So there's a natural inherent bias to go

173
00:09:10,960 --> 00:09:15,160
Speaker 2: to the negative. The negative stings long, stings and last longer. However,

174
00:09:16,040 --> 00:09:20,280
Speaker 2: cultural phenomenon and pep phenomenon and people can make us

175
00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:24,680
Speaker 2: more negative. Media is terrible, you know, if it leads,

176
00:09:24,720 --> 00:09:28,000
Speaker 2: it leads people like to gossip, people like to talk

177
00:09:28,400 --> 00:09:33,400
Speaker 2: about others' flaws and faults, and that's again human nature.

178
00:09:33,880 --> 00:09:38,880
Speaker 2: So we have to guard against the tendency, the human

179
00:09:38,960 --> 00:09:42,600
Speaker 2: tendency to do things that are of the negative. And

180
00:09:42,640 --> 00:09:46,240
Speaker 2: that's all why, because it's human nature, because it's easier

181
00:09:46,520 --> 00:09:50,000
Speaker 2: because the cultural norms around us. Because people like to bitch,

182
00:09:50,120 --> 00:09:53,000
Speaker 2: people like to complain, people like to talk about other people,

183
00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:55,960
Speaker 2: people like to point out flaws. You can see it

184
00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:57,920
Speaker 2: in other people. You need to notice it when you're

185
00:09:57,960 --> 00:10:02,000
Speaker 2: getting all cranky. Wait a minute, this what's going on here.

186
00:10:03,000 --> 00:10:05,960
Speaker 2: It's a natural tendency like gravity. You know, if you

187
00:10:06,000 --> 00:10:07,440
Speaker 2: put a lot of food in front of somebody, they're

188
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:11,360
Speaker 2: gonna overeat. You know, we got bad habits and good habits.

189
00:10:11,400 --> 00:10:15,120
Speaker 2: You have to, you know, work on being you know

190
00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:19,679
Speaker 2: better habitual person, good person. Don't make it complicated. The

191
00:10:19,679 --> 00:10:23,319
Speaker 2: whole thing Jenna about this is don't over overthink this,

192
00:10:24,160 --> 00:10:26,440
Speaker 2: Just do the next right thing. After you screw up

193
00:10:27,080 --> 00:10:29,679
Speaker 2: to your credit, you recognized you were being cranky and

194
00:10:29,720 --> 00:10:32,280
Speaker 2: you said this ain't me. I got to go get help.

195
00:10:32,920 --> 00:10:36,480
Speaker 2: What I would say to you is, don't complicate it.

196
00:10:37,040 --> 00:10:40,280
Speaker 2: Do the next right thing for yourself or someone else.

197
00:10:40,320 --> 00:10:43,240
Speaker 2: They're interchangeable. If you need to take a break, take

198
00:10:43,280 --> 00:10:44,800
Speaker 2: a break. If you need to get some help, get

199
00:10:44,840 --> 00:10:49,000
Speaker 2: some help. If you need to you know, wind down,

200
00:10:49,480 --> 00:10:53,480
Speaker 2: wind get it, get it. Yeah, But I mean that

201
00:10:53,760 --> 00:10:57,120
Speaker 2: in the don't make it hard for anyone or anybody else,

202
00:10:57,240 --> 00:11:01,160
Speaker 2: like the tiniest things. And you said I was generous

203
00:11:01,200 --> 00:11:03,360
Speaker 2: and kind. That's very nice. It's not that hard to

204
00:11:03,400 --> 00:11:06,280
Speaker 2: be generous and kind. Here's what I just recently learned,

205
00:11:06,280 --> 00:11:08,000
Speaker 2: which is, you know what the hard part about this?

206
00:11:08,520 --> 00:11:13,760
Speaker 2: There isn't any There's no hard part about this. None

207
00:11:14,520 --> 00:11:17,480
Speaker 2: not hard to be a nice person. It's not hard

208
00:11:17,520 --> 00:11:20,520
Speaker 2: to take a break. It's not hard to you know,

209
00:11:20,960 --> 00:11:23,800
Speaker 2: you made a boo boo. Yes it is, No, it isn't.

210
00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:26,720
Speaker 2: You know what I mean? You noticed it in a heartbeat.

211
00:11:26,760 --> 00:11:30,439
Speaker 2: You said, I'm being all all, I'm lashing out. The

212
00:11:30,520 --> 00:11:34,000
Speaker 2: minute you lashed out, you said, wait a minute, that's

213
00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:36,280
Speaker 2: not how I want to be. Something's up. You're right,

214
00:11:36,679 --> 00:11:39,240
Speaker 2: figure it out and knock it off, which you did.

215
00:11:40,160 --> 00:11:43,040
Speaker 2: And I asked you it was your therapist helpful because

216
00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:45,480
Speaker 2: you know I was a therapist, and I know sometimes

217
00:11:45,480 --> 00:11:48,400
Speaker 2: I can be helpful sometimes not. The goal is to

218
00:11:48,440 --> 00:11:50,440
Speaker 2: be helpful, you know.

219
00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:54,360
Speaker 1: Other, what other tangible tip could you say? Because I

220
00:11:54,360 --> 00:11:57,280
Speaker 1: think when I heard you say the glass half empty,

221
00:11:57,440 --> 00:12:01,560
Speaker 1: I do go that way most times where I and

222
00:12:01,600 --> 00:12:05,400
Speaker 1: I'm learning and trying to flip that to go no,

223
00:12:05,559 --> 00:12:09,440
Speaker 1: I'm gonna this next year or this year is going

224
00:12:09,520 --> 00:12:13,520
Speaker 1: to be very fulfilling, it's going to be a great year.

225
00:12:13,559 --> 00:12:16,760
Speaker 1: It's going to be a successful year. Instead of going, well,

226
00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:18,679
Speaker 1: I haven't gotten that role yet, or you know, it's

227
00:12:18,720 --> 00:12:22,439
Speaker 1: where I just I go to that kind of pessimistic

228
00:12:23,679 --> 00:12:25,920
Speaker 1: been in this for a long time, like.

229
00:12:27,400 --> 00:12:30,439
Speaker 2: Rotation, don't go first of all, don't go into a

230
00:12:30,480 --> 00:12:32,480
Speaker 2: full year. Do it today, do it the next minute,

231
00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:35,440
Speaker 2: do the next hour. Do it in this conversation. The

232
00:12:35,520 --> 00:12:38,440
Speaker 2: minute you hear yourself go into the you know, go

233
00:12:38,480 --> 00:12:40,000
Speaker 2: to the dark side, say wait a minute, I just

234
00:12:40,080 --> 00:12:42,440
Speaker 2: I just noticed that. Oh yeah, I don't need to

235
00:12:42,440 --> 00:12:46,280
Speaker 2: do that. And from shift your minds and your mindset

236
00:12:46,679 --> 00:12:52,200
Speaker 2: from get to to got to mm hmm instead of

237
00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:54,680
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, got to to get to? You say, oh

238
00:12:54,720 --> 00:12:58,360
Speaker 2: I did I meant to say get to God? Got

239
00:12:58,400 --> 00:13:01,400
Speaker 2: to to get to I made mistake? So what you

240
00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:03,440
Speaker 2: know what I mean? Like, oh I gotta go to work? No, no, no,

241
00:13:03,480 --> 00:13:05,360
Speaker 2: I get to go to work. Oh it didn't happen.

242
00:13:05,400 --> 00:13:09,360
Speaker 2: Oh well, So when you hear yourself go negative, let

243
00:13:09,400 --> 00:13:13,800
Speaker 2: your negativity be your best friend. When you wanted the

244
00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:16,920
Speaker 2: practical tip, the minute you go dark the minute you

245
00:13:16,960 --> 00:13:19,600
Speaker 2: go to your dark about Oh, I remember that guy

246
00:13:19,640 --> 00:13:22,920
Speaker 2: Harry said that. Let it be a little reminder, like

247
00:13:22,920 --> 00:13:26,720
Speaker 2: a little dude, dude, you got this, Thank you, You're welcome.

248
00:13:27,360 --> 00:13:30,880
Speaker 2: So the negativity is your friend because you can shift

249
00:13:30,880 --> 00:13:33,360
Speaker 2: it in a split second. Oh I just said that.

250
00:13:33,920 --> 00:13:36,400
Speaker 2: I just said I got to No, wait a minute,

251
00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:39,040
Speaker 2: I mean, where are your kids right now? Where's the

252
00:13:39,040 --> 00:13:40,319
Speaker 2: little baby who's watching.

253
00:13:40,040 --> 00:13:43,720
Speaker 1: The baby baby's napping? This is nap hour?

254
00:13:43,960 --> 00:13:44,840
Speaker 2: Oh beautiful.

255
00:13:45,320 --> 00:13:48,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, so I schedule things, you know, to make sure.

256
00:13:48,880 --> 00:13:50,040
Speaker 2: Okay, where's the five.

257
00:13:50,960 --> 00:13:53,400
Speaker 1: Five year old is actually with their dad today?

258
00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:58,200
Speaker 2: Beautiful? Yeah, so this quiet, beautiful respite and the baby's sleeping.

259
00:13:58,600 --> 00:14:00,920
Speaker 2: As soon as that baby cries. If you feel yourself

260
00:14:00,960 --> 00:14:04,880
Speaker 2: go oh no, okay, if you heard yourself go oh no,

261
00:14:05,520 --> 00:14:06,120
Speaker 2: it's a he or.

262
00:14:06,080 --> 00:14:09,400
Speaker 1: Sheet, it's a boy. But I just felt myself get

263
00:14:09,480 --> 00:14:10,960
Speaker 1: and this is just what happened their day. When I

264
00:14:10,960 --> 00:14:13,720
Speaker 1: was recording an audition, I'm in this. It's his nap time.

265
00:14:13,760 --> 00:14:16,760
Speaker 1: I'm recording for auditioning for what probably one of the

266
00:14:16,800 --> 00:14:20,240
Speaker 1: biggest movies I've ever auditioned for. I hear him crying,

267
00:14:20,240 --> 00:14:23,360
Speaker 1: and I'm like, no, I immediately I'm like no, no, no, no,

268
00:14:23,360 --> 00:14:24,520
Speaker 1: like you have to go back to like and I'm

269
00:14:24,560 --> 00:14:26,280
Speaker 1: stressing out and then I just go straight into that

270
00:14:26,360 --> 00:14:28,080
Speaker 1: panic aggression stress out mode.

271
00:14:28,120 --> 00:14:29,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, hold on a second. So let's just use as

272
00:14:29,760 --> 00:14:32,720
Speaker 2: an example that is going to happen. That is going

273
00:14:32,760 --> 00:14:35,560
Speaker 2: to happen a million times. So when it does, this

274
00:14:35,600 --> 00:14:39,200
Speaker 2: isn't your first rodeo. Oh man, the body's going to

275
00:14:39,280 --> 00:14:41,520
Speaker 2: do its thing. The body will do its thing. You're

276
00:14:41,520 --> 00:14:43,360
Speaker 2: not going to stop the body from reacting. You know,

277
00:14:43,680 --> 00:14:46,800
Speaker 2: they say, don't get nervous. Everybody gets nervous. You fled

278
00:14:46,880 --> 00:14:50,680
Speaker 2: is to let the channel, lets that by thely reaction,

279
00:14:50,840 --> 00:14:52,280
Speaker 2: reframe it in your mind. I'm going to get the

280
00:14:52,280 --> 00:14:55,920
Speaker 2: butterflies to fly information not gonna not have butterflies. It's like,

281
00:14:56,240 --> 00:14:59,200
Speaker 2: oh boy, all right, let's go rock and roll. Use

282
00:14:59,240 --> 00:15:01,880
Speaker 2: yourself talk, say I got this, not my first rodeo.

283
00:15:01,960 --> 00:15:05,240
Speaker 2: Whatever words you can use to say, Hey, I'm a mom.

284
00:15:05,640 --> 00:15:07,720
Speaker 2: If they don't want me as a mom, too bad,

285
00:15:08,160 --> 00:15:12,200
Speaker 2: I'm good. I got this self talk. You know, take

286
00:15:12,240 --> 00:15:20,120
Speaker 2: a breath, take take another one, take three, say out loud,

287
00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:22,360
Speaker 2: I hope you don't mind that. My baby's well, my

288
00:15:22,480 --> 00:15:24,520
Speaker 2: heart's to thumping because my baby just cried. I hope

289
00:15:24,560 --> 00:15:28,640
Speaker 2: you don't just be vulnerable and gutsy and throw yourself

290
00:15:28,680 --> 00:15:32,120
Speaker 2: into your work and your role and to your you know,

291
00:15:32,280 --> 00:15:37,240
Speaker 2: your life and let the chips fall where they may.

292
00:15:37,840 --> 00:15:40,120
Speaker 2: You can control what you can control. You can't control

293
00:15:40,240 --> 00:15:42,480
Speaker 2: anything else. If they don't want you, to screw it,

294
00:15:42,800 --> 00:15:45,320
Speaker 2: you'll get another role and another role. That's the nature

295
00:15:45,360 --> 00:15:48,080
Speaker 2: of this business. They're gonna say yes, they're going to

296
00:15:48,120 --> 00:15:49,920
Speaker 2: say no. They're gonna say yes, they're gonna say no,

297
00:15:50,240 --> 00:15:50,800
Speaker 2: we don't.

298
00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:52,400
Speaker 1: Care, which is where I think I've become a little

299
00:15:52,440 --> 00:15:56,320
Speaker 1: half empty. Two is the just then amounts of rejection

300
00:15:56,560 --> 00:16:00,840
Speaker 1: and the the uh you know, the social media and

301
00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:07,320
Speaker 1: the bully, all those things become. But now I again,

302
00:16:07,560 --> 00:16:11,200
Speaker 1: once I turned forty and once it's like there's there's

303
00:16:11,240 --> 00:16:14,160
Speaker 1: a shift and going, Okay, this life is too short.

304
00:16:14,360 --> 00:16:16,120
Speaker 2: You got it, it's.

305
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:18,120
Speaker 1: To ever have. And that's the same thing with my ex.

306
00:16:18,320 --> 00:16:22,160
Speaker 1: I hated his guts for at least well for a

307
00:16:22,160 --> 00:16:23,960
Speaker 1: long time, but when we even got divorced, I mean

308
00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:27,520
Speaker 1: I was I just had I just every morning I

309
00:16:27,560 --> 00:16:29,440
Speaker 1: woke up and I just I hated him. And now

310
00:16:29,440 --> 00:16:32,720
Speaker 1: I'm like that was such a disservice to myself because

311
00:16:33,360 --> 00:16:36,200
Speaker 1: good now and now we're great, we have a great relationship.

312
00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:39,080
Speaker 1: Everything is used because I'm like, I'd rather be friends.

313
00:16:39,080 --> 00:16:40,960
Speaker 1: I don't want why why would I hate him? It's

314
00:16:41,040 --> 00:16:42,760
Speaker 1: I don't want that energy in my body. I don't

315
00:16:43,080 --> 00:16:44,200
Speaker 1: I don't want it for the kids.

316
00:16:44,280 --> 00:16:46,320
Speaker 2: It's just look, see, this is what I mean by

317
00:16:46,320 --> 00:16:48,960
Speaker 2: doing the next right thing is beautiful. You can use

318
00:16:49,080 --> 00:16:52,840
Speaker 2: every single success in your life to propel you to

319
00:16:52,920 --> 00:16:56,160
Speaker 2: the next one, and every single failure to go, oh good,

320
00:16:56,480 --> 00:16:59,800
Speaker 2: I mean that story is just beautiful. What you transmuted

321
00:17:00,080 --> 00:17:02,920
Speaker 2: relationship with your ex. Do that fifty thousand more times

322
00:17:03,280 --> 00:17:06,760
Speaker 2: as best you can. You just told me this beautiful

323
00:17:06,800 --> 00:17:10,200
Speaker 2: success story of you and your ex. Yes, do more

324
00:17:10,240 --> 00:17:12,840
Speaker 2: of that. When you get rejected, you go, you know,

325
00:17:12,880 --> 00:17:16,399
Speaker 2: I handle that rejection pretty well. Good for you. At

326
00:17:16,480 --> 00:17:19,480
Speaker 2: least I got an audition. At least I got a shot.

327
00:17:19,720 --> 00:17:22,800
Speaker 2: Some people don't get an audition. You've got an audition

328
00:17:22,840 --> 00:17:27,160
Speaker 2: and they rejected you. Rock and roll. I I want

329
00:17:27,160 --> 00:17:28,720
Speaker 2: you to have that self. I want you to be

330
00:17:28,800 --> 00:17:32,360
Speaker 2: your best friend, coach on your shoulder, talking to yourself,

331
00:17:32,960 --> 00:17:36,359
Speaker 2: getting yourself back in the arena every.

332
00:17:36,160 --> 00:17:39,520
Speaker 1: Single Yeah, and I love that, and that's definitely what

333
00:17:39,520 --> 00:17:41,480
Speaker 1: I'm going to bring into this new year. And I

334
00:17:41,480 --> 00:17:44,879
Speaker 1: guess the question too, aram that is, what how do

335
00:17:44,920 --> 00:17:46,600
Speaker 1: you do that when the other person doesn't want to

336
00:17:46,600 --> 00:17:49,960
Speaker 1: meet you there? If there's someone that you want to have,

337
00:17:51,359 --> 00:17:54,520
Speaker 1: you know, a not that kind of relationship, or you

338
00:17:54,560 --> 00:17:57,439
Speaker 1: don't want that negativity, if you're how can you how

339
00:17:57,440 --> 00:17:59,520
Speaker 1: can you meet there? If that person doesn't want that back?

340
00:17:59,520 --> 00:18:02,800
Speaker 2: You all go up, walk away, welcome. You can't change. Look,

341
00:18:03,119 --> 00:18:05,280
Speaker 2: you've got three little ones and they're all different. You

342
00:18:05,320 --> 00:18:07,600
Speaker 2: can't make them a certain way. You try your ber right.

343
00:18:07,600 --> 00:18:09,439
Speaker 1: I want people cup what you're doing with your book though,

344
00:18:09,480 --> 00:18:11,159
Speaker 1: is I'm almost like, guys, well, we don't have to

345
00:18:11,200 --> 00:18:13,000
Speaker 1: be angry at each other. Let's all get along and

346
00:18:13,280 --> 00:18:14,760
Speaker 1: we don't have to be friends. But can we at

347
00:18:14,840 --> 00:18:18,280
Speaker 1: least have like, you know, cordial Well.

348
00:18:18,640 --> 00:18:20,879
Speaker 2: You can say that out loud. Do whatever works. In

349
00:18:20,880 --> 00:18:23,800
Speaker 2: other words, there's not a formula to a successful life,

350
00:18:23,800 --> 00:18:26,440
Speaker 2: although I do believe this is the formula I eat.

351
00:18:26,600 --> 00:18:30,600
Speaker 2: The more we I am heliotropic, my life goes great

352
00:18:30,960 --> 00:18:33,800
Speaker 2: when I get angry. I'm full of it. When I'm

353
00:18:33,960 --> 00:18:39,320
Speaker 2: you know, some kind of working up a froth about irritation.

354
00:18:39,760 --> 00:18:41,760
Speaker 2: You know, you were three minutes late for this podcast.

355
00:18:43,280 --> 00:18:46,480
Speaker 2: Took me about thirty two seconds to go get off

356
00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:50,280
Speaker 2: at Harry. And that's one of my things, which is

357
00:18:51,600 --> 00:18:54,800
Speaker 2: it never ends. So your job is to be the

358
00:18:54,840 --> 00:18:57,800
Speaker 2: most magnificent human being you can be, and that's a

359
00:18:57,840 --> 00:19:02,000
Speaker 2: full time job. And other people will be moved by that.

360
00:19:02,160 --> 00:19:06,000
Speaker 2: If people aren't operating to your liking, well are you

361
00:19:06,080 --> 00:19:09,200
Speaker 2: operating to your own liking? If you could say yeah, yeah, yeah,

362
00:19:09,280 --> 00:19:11,080
Speaker 2: then let them be who they are. You don't have to.

363
00:19:11,080 --> 00:19:14,000
Speaker 1: Hang out with them, for sure. I think it's just

364
00:19:14,040 --> 00:19:17,040
Speaker 1: more hard to see so many people so angry in

365
00:19:17,040 --> 00:19:19,520
Speaker 1: this world. That's where I just get frustrated. I'm like,

366
00:19:19,560 --> 00:19:21,440
Speaker 1: why do you have to be so angry?

367
00:19:21,800 --> 00:19:27,920
Speaker 2: Because they are whatever, lost in their own mental marass

368
00:19:28,200 --> 00:19:32,560
Speaker 2: of stupidity. And I say that with compassion. You've been stupid.

369
00:19:32,600 --> 00:19:36,280
Speaker 2: Look at you. You were angry at your ex and

370
00:19:36,320 --> 00:19:39,760
Speaker 2: then you untangled it from your own inner web. Nothing changed.

371
00:19:39,800 --> 00:19:43,440
Speaker 2: He's the same guy, and yet you just untangled whatever

372
00:19:43,520 --> 00:19:46,959
Speaker 2: web you had, whatever words and rationalizations you had for

373
00:19:47,000 --> 00:19:50,400
Speaker 2: what a no goodneck y was that you got out of.

374
00:19:50,800 --> 00:19:52,639
Speaker 2: They'll figure it out too. And if you can be

375
00:19:52,720 --> 00:19:56,080
Speaker 2: helpful to them with a hand on their shoulder or

376
00:19:56,320 --> 00:20:00,000
Speaker 2: some kind of wisdom, then they'll untangle from their anger.

377
00:20:00,520 --> 00:20:02,280
Speaker 2: But you see people who are angry and you go,

378
00:20:02,400 --> 00:20:05,520
Speaker 2: oh my god, I used to be angry at my ex.

379
00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:08,639
Speaker 2: Let me see if I can be helpful and untangle

380
00:20:08,760 --> 00:20:12,720
Speaker 2: him or from their stupidity. Not in the judgmental you're

381
00:20:12,760 --> 00:20:15,440
Speaker 2: better than them, but there but for the grace of God,

382
00:20:15,520 --> 00:20:18,359
Speaker 2: go I. You just said you were a knucklehead with him.

383
00:20:18,520 --> 00:20:20,960
Speaker 2: Now you're not power to you girl?

384
00:20:34,040 --> 00:20:36,840
Speaker 1: Is that why you wrote this book? To help people,

385
00:20:37,200 --> 00:20:39,800
Speaker 1: you know, getting to that heliotropic state.

386
00:20:40,280 --> 00:20:43,040
Speaker 2: Yep, it's for me. It's not for I mean, this

387
00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:44,760
Speaker 2: is my job for the rest of my life until

388
00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:47,399
Speaker 2: I croak, and as many people in the world if

389
00:20:47,400 --> 00:20:50,760
Speaker 2: they could get this, Oh my god. You mean it's

390
00:20:50,760 --> 00:20:54,480
Speaker 2: as simple as that. Yes, well, yeah, but what about

391
00:20:54,720 --> 00:20:56,560
Speaker 2: what about nothing? I got a chapter in there, do

392
00:20:56,600 --> 00:20:59,440
Speaker 2: it anyway? There's a million reasons why it's hard to

393
00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:03,920
Speaker 2: be helio be heliotropic anyway. I stole that from mother Teresa.

394
00:21:04,640 --> 00:21:07,359
Speaker 2: And you know what I mean, it's not do good anyway,

395
00:21:07,720 --> 00:21:11,200
Speaker 2: be good anyway? Yeah, but what about when they're what Yeah,

396
00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:13,920
Speaker 2: you be generous anyway. What about when people take advantage

397
00:21:13,960 --> 00:21:16,919
Speaker 2: of you? Yeah, that's okay, you know what, I'm okay

398
00:21:16,960 --> 00:21:19,320
Speaker 2: with that. I'm going to go to my grave feeling

399
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:21,800
Speaker 2: really good about being a good person. And I can

400
00:21:21,880 --> 00:21:23,040
Speaker 2: be a better person.

401
00:21:23,840 --> 00:21:25,960
Speaker 1: And you can still be a good person and having

402
00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:28,320
Speaker 1: boundaries too. You don't want people to walk all over you.

403
00:21:28,720 --> 00:21:31,719
Speaker 2: To definitionally being a good person a good person. No, no,

404
00:21:31,760 --> 00:21:34,040
Speaker 2: you can't. You can't. You can't come in the house,

405
00:21:34,760 --> 00:21:37,720
Speaker 2: not with those shoes. I'm a very good person, which

406
00:21:37,760 --> 00:21:39,520
Speaker 2: means you stay outside with those mney shoes.

407
00:21:39,760 --> 00:21:42,600
Speaker 1: Where do you go? Not heliotropic in your life? Because

408
00:21:42,600 --> 00:21:47,440
Speaker 1: I'm curious as I get irritated, what's your biggest thing? Like? Yeah,

409
00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:49,200
Speaker 1: what you say? You got irritated with? What?

410
00:21:49,480 --> 00:21:53,000
Speaker 2: Yeah? You were late for my podcast. I'm a guest.

411
00:21:53,480 --> 00:21:56,040
Speaker 2: I'm organizing my late life to do this podcast.

412
00:21:56,160 --> 00:21:58,720
Speaker 1: I had to put my baby down. Excuse me, I

413
00:21:58,800 --> 00:22:01,199
Speaker 1: have every right you have my life.

414
00:22:01,520 --> 00:22:03,680
Speaker 2: No, no, but here I am. You're putting your baby

415
00:22:03,720 --> 00:22:06,960
Speaker 2: down way more important than me. You know, Well, it's

416
00:22:06,960 --> 00:22:10,880
Speaker 2: a schedule for one. That's an small irritation. It's tiny,

417
00:22:11,320 --> 00:22:13,560
Speaker 2: But I'm ten times better than I used to be Jenna.

418
00:22:13,640 --> 00:22:15,920
Speaker 2: That's when I'm saying it out loud, I'm poking fun

419
00:22:15,960 --> 00:22:19,560
Speaker 2: at myself. I used to be way worse. This work

420
00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:24,119
Speaker 2: has made me a better person. I get irritated way less.

421
00:22:24,520 --> 00:22:26,880
Speaker 2: You asked me, what are my biggest I think when

422
00:22:26,920 --> 00:22:29,720
Speaker 2: people don't care, when people are dishonest, when people are

423
00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:37,119
Speaker 2: are mean and nasty and disrespectful and unkind, and it

424
00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:39,719
Speaker 2: does shock me. And they're in my ecosystem, They're in

425
00:22:39,720 --> 00:22:42,080
Speaker 2: my world somehow, And how did I wind up with

426
00:22:42,119 --> 00:22:44,959
Speaker 2: this person in my life? And I let them in

427
00:22:45,080 --> 00:22:49,600
Speaker 2: or something? And so that's hard for me, Like how

428
00:22:49,600 --> 00:22:51,399
Speaker 2: did I create a lot for this person? This is

429
00:22:51,480 --> 00:22:56,919
Speaker 2: in my world? But I really work at that of

430
00:22:57,080 --> 00:23:02,560
Speaker 2: not being irritated. And when I get irritated, because.

431
00:23:02,640 --> 00:23:04,960
Speaker 1: Give us again some little nuggets for us to take

432
00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:07,160
Speaker 1: away with that, because you've given us a lot.

433
00:23:07,359 --> 00:23:09,359
Speaker 2: Okay, So I say, what else from the book? I

434
00:23:09,359 --> 00:23:11,280
Speaker 2: see it? I mean, okay, So every chapter in that

435
00:23:11,320 --> 00:23:14,320
Speaker 2: book is a reminder to me. Oh right, I can.

436
00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:16,840
Speaker 2: I can take the high road. There's a chapter take

437
00:23:16,840 --> 00:23:20,960
Speaker 2: the road. There's chapter smile and move on. When I

438
00:23:20,960 --> 00:23:25,920
Speaker 2: get irritated, take a breath, smile, smile, but just too

439
00:23:26,040 --> 00:23:35,480
Speaker 2: big a smile and move on. Smiling literally changes you, okay,

440
00:23:35,560 --> 00:23:38,280
Speaker 2: you know, be your own best friend, be your own son.

441
00:23:38,960 --> 00:23:41,280
Speaker 2: You know that's a tiny eat. By the way, each

442
00:23:41,359 --> 00:23:43,760
Speaker 2: chapter is one page. What does that mean? It means

443
00:23:44,000 --> 00:23:47,240
Speaker 2: take care of yourself. I do a lot of personal hygiene.

444
00:23:47,400 --> 00:23:50,440
Speaker 2: I eat well, exercise, I get outside, I spend time

445
00:23:50,480 --> 00:23:53,720
Speaker 2: with loved ones. I am my own son. I watch

446
00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:58,320
Speaker 2: myself talk. I watch the words that I say to myself, Harry,

447
00:23:58,359 --> 00:24:01,480
Speaker 2: You're such an idiot, you idiot? What what was that?

448
00:24:02,200 --> 00:24:05,400
Speaker 2: I'm rattling them off because there's so many and they're

449
00:24:05,440 --> 00:24:09,720
Speaker 2: interchangeably good. If I hear myself saying you idiot, because

450
00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:13,520
Speaker 2: I'll say that, like, what's that? I'm not? You know,

451
00:24:13,520 --> 00:24:17,280
Speaker 2: I just need a mistake, right, And so I love

452
00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:21,320
Speaker 2: my ability to up my own game by seeing my

453
00:24:21,400 --> 00:24:26,880
Speaker 2: flaws as ooh, those are teachers. Every obstacle is a teacher,

454
00:24:27,760 --> 00:24:34,959
Speaker 2: every turd fest, every probect. I can't say that, I mean,

455
00:24:34,960 --> 00:24:35,920
Speaker 2: I shouldn't say that, but.

456
00:24:36,160 --> 00:24:37,919
Speaker 1: No, I love no. I love that. I always say that.

457
00:24:37,920 --> 00:24:41,840
Speaker 1: It's like every everything. I love sometimes making the mistakes

458
00:24:41,880 --> 00:24:43,840
Speaker 1: because I get great lessons from those. Those are the

459
00:24:44,359 --> 00:24:46,200
Speaker 1: greatest lessons that's the.

460
00:24:46,160 --> 00:24:49,040
Speaker 2: Whole idea, Jenna. You just answered it like, oh that,

461
00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:52,040
Speaker 2: let that mistake teach me. What was the lessons? First grade?

462
00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:55,040
Speaker 2: Second grade? I got to repeat it? Did I not learn?

463
00:24:55,280 --> 00:24:59,200
Speaker 2: How about rushing? How about rushing? Look, I'm at three

464
00:24:59,240 --> 00:25:03,399
Speaker 2: million mile delta, I'm a permanent diamond, and I still

465
00:25:03,560 --> 00:25:06,080
Speaker 2: rush to the airport. Like, what is up with that?

466
00:25:06,200 --> 00:25:09,639
Speaker 2: I think this is the year we'll see that I

467
00:25:09,720 --> 00:25:13,880
Speaker 2: don't rush. I mean, how stupid is that? Rushing? That's

468
00:25:13,960 --> 00:25:18,760
Speaker 2: dumbest dumb, you know, not dressing properly, not being Oh

469
00:25:18,800 --> 00:25:20,760
Speaker 2: I got one for this year. I read it. I

470
00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:24,760
Speaker 2: got so many piles of debris that are just messes,

471
00:25:25,800 --> 00:25:30,760
Speaker 2: and I allow messes to gobble up my precious energy

472
00:25:31,000 --> 00:25:33,000
Speaker 2: so I can clean up my messes or not make them,

473
00:25:33,080 --> 00:25:36,360
Speaker 2: you know what I'm talking about. Yeah, And so I

474
00:25:36,440 --> 00:25:40,840
Speaker 2: love this work because it's simple. I read a lot,

475
00:25:41,280 --> 00:25:43,920
Speaker 2: and I forget most everything I read, but I can

476
00:25:44,000 --> 00:25:50,480
Speaker 2: remember be the sun. Not to be kind, Jane. I

477
00:25:50,520 --> 00:25:52,240
Speaker 2: want you to spread this to the world. I want

478
00:25:52,280 --> 00:25:57,800
Speaker 2: you to be uplifting to yourself mostly really kind to yourself,

479
00:25:58,520 --> 00:26:00,560
Speaker 2: no matter what you got through the little nerds to

480
00:26:00,640 --> 00:26:05,520
Speaker 2: take care of plus yourself four nerds, four little nerds

481
00:26:05,520 --> 00:26:07,439
Speaker 2: to take care of. I want you to be so

482
00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:11,720
Speaker 2: compassionate for giving and loving to the four of you

483
00:26:12,600 --> 00:26:17,040
Speaker 2: that your life is forever immediately transformed. That this podcast

484
00:26:17,400 --> 00:26:20,080
Speaker 2: just sticks with you like a virus that never leaves

485
00:26:20,480 --> 00:26:25,199
Speaker 2: a healthy virus. You're immune from getting bummed out. But

486
00:26:25,280 --> 00:26:27,440
Speaker 2: your buddy, I love that you're bummed out in this

487
00:26:27,600 --> 00:26:31,920
Speaker 2: lasts I don't know a minute, Okay.

488
00:26:31,640 --> 00:26:34,439
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean it's a good reminder for everyone to

489
00:26:34,440 --> 00:26:36,520
Speaker 1: go into the new year to be the Sun not

490
00:26:36,600 --> 00:26:39,200
Speaker 1: the Salt. And I just I love that, and again

491
00:26:39,240 --> 00:26:43,560
Speaker 1: I just want like for me again, this year is

492
00:26:43,600 --> 00:26:48,240
Speaker 1: all about just shedding that energy of letting other people's

493
00:26:48,680 --> 00:26:52,960
Speaker 1: hatefulness come into my sacred space. And so I think

494
00:26:53,040 --> 00:26:55,280
Speaker 1: again that's a great reminder, be the Sun not the salt.

495
00:26:55,280 --> 00:26:56,840
Speaker 1: And that'll be kind of my mantra for the year.

496
00:26:56,880 --> 00:27:00,000
Speaker 1: And I hope it's everyone else's that's listening. So thank you.

497
00:27:00,040 --> 00:27:01,880
Speaker 1: And where can our listeners find you?

498
00:27:01,880 --> 00:27:05,680
Speaker 2: You can find me on Be the Sun Not the Salt,

499
00:27:06,280 --> 00:27:09,760
Speaker 2: on your favorite wherever you find podcasts, Be the Sun

500
00:27:09,880 --> 00:27:12,119
Speaker 2: Not the Salt. As a website, we try and keep

501
00:27:12,640 --> 00:27:16,280
Speaker 2: fresh with new stuff. But we're going to do podcasts

502
00:27:16,320 --> 00:27:19,680
Speaker 2: of guests who can tell stories about how this has

503
00:27:19,760 --> 00:27:20,639
Speaker 2: helped them.

504
00:27:21,119 --> 00:27:22,600
Speaker 1: I love that you want to.

505
00:27:22,520 --> 00:27:24,680
Speaker 2: Be a podcast guest. All you got to be is

506
00:27:24,680 --> 00:27:27,920
Speaker 2: a good person with a story to tell, and how

507
00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:31,199
Speaker 2: Be the Sun Not the Salt has helped you. So

508
00:27:31,440 --> 00:27:33,800
Speaker 2: whenever you're ready, if you want to be a guest,

509
00:27:34,880 --> 00:27:36,800
Speaker 2: and you say, you know this really helped me. In

510
00:27:36,880 --> 00:27:40,000
Speaker 2: twenty twenty three, I met this guy, I read this book,

511
00:27:40,040 --> 00:27:42,720
Speaker 2: saw this thing, and it's been so much My life

512
00:27:42,720 --> 00:27:44,720
Speaker 2: has been so much better. That story will help a

513
00:27:44,760 --> 00:27:48,840
Speaker 2: bunch of people, Janna, So find us on where you

514
00:27:48,880 --> 00:27:52,159
Speaker 2: find podcasts Be the Sun Not the Salt, pick up

515
00:27:52,160 --> 00:27:57,280
Speaker 2: the book, give it out as a gift. Mostly practice

516
00:27:57,280 --> 00:28:01,200
Speaker 2: being that way. And that's my mission and for myself

517
00:28:01,320 --> 00:28:05,080
Speaker 2: and for you. And I'm not kidding about that offer

518
00:28:05,200 --> 00:28:07,480
Speaker 2: for front row seats at the Big Oh.

519
00:28:08,520 --> 00:28:11,760
Speaker 1: I'm going to have my peeps get your info. So

520
00:28:11,800 --> 00:28:15,639
Speaker 1: thank you. Will definitely take you up on that. I

521
00:28:15,720 --> 00:28:18,720
Speaker 1: really appreciate it. But seriously, thank you, and thanks for

522
00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:21,240
Speaker 1: coming on. And I'll see you in Detroit.

523
00:28:20,880 --> 00:28:22,920
Speaker 2: Soon, okay. I'll talk to you soon.

524
00:28:22,960 --> 00:28:25,199
Speaker 1: Okay, And I'll be a guest on your podcast and

525
00:28:25,200 --> 00:28:27,040
Speaker 1: I'll be three minutes early. All right, So how's that.

526
00:28:27,640 --> 00:28:29,520
Speaker 2: But you have to have a story to tell about

527
00:28:29,520 --> 00:28:30,320
Speaker 2: how this really helped.

528
00:28:30,440 --> 00:28:33,479
Speaker 1: I will. I will for sure it already has. Thank you,

529
00:28:33,640 --> 00:28:34,680
Speaker 1: all right, Bye bye,