1 00:00:01,639 --> 00:00:09,320 Speaker 1: You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Girl. Hi everyone, 2 00:00:09,440 --> 00:00:12,680 Speaker 1: welcome to I Choose Me. This podcast, as you know, 3 00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:15,920 Speaker 1: is all about the choices we make throughout our lives. 4 00:00:17,000 --> 00:00:21,239 Speaker 1: Today's conversation is one that really stayed with me long 5 00:00:21,280 --> 00:00:26,720 Speaker 1: after we stopped recording. Susan Lucci opens her heart in 6 00:00:26,880 --> 00:00:31,680 Speaker 1: such an honest, courageous way, from the sudden end of 7 00:00:31,720 --> 00:00:35,480 Speaker 1: her four decade run on All My Children as Erica Kane, 8 00:00:36,159 --> 00:00:41,120 Speaker 1: to some really personal, profound losses and the choices she 9 00:00:41,320 --> 00:00:45,040 Speaker 1: made to rebuild herself and her family. We talk about 10 00:00:45,080 --> 00:00:49,680 Speaker 1: the mentors who have shaped Susan and aging with love 11 00:00:50,240 --> 00:00:55,160 Speaker 1: instead of fear. She teaches us that time truly can heal. 12 00:00:55,880 --> 00:00:59,840 Speaker 1: Please please welcome the incredible Susan Lucci. I've always been 13 00:00:59,880 --> 00:01:01,520 Speaker 1: so a fan of yours. I just have to admit 14 00:01:01,560 --> 00:01:04,399 Speaker 1: that you are an icon. How do you feel about that? 15 00:01:04,480 --> 00:01:06,440 Speaker 1: How do you feel about me saying that? I've sure 16 00:01:06,480 --> 00:01:08,880 Speaker 1: you've heard it many times now, you. 17 00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:12,319 Speaker 2: Know, every time I hear it inside, I say, really, 18 00:01:12,880 --> 00:01:16,960 Speaker 2: really yeah, I've always spent as a very big compliment. 19 00:01:17,000 --> 00:01:18,960 Speaker 2: And I know it's a compliment, and I thank you 20 00:01:19,040 --> 00:01:21,880 Speaker 2: for saying it, but yes, in my inside voice is going. 21 00:01:22,240 --> 00:01:25,840 Speaker 1: Really, I love that honesty because that's how I feel too. 22 00:01:25,880 --> 00:01:28,840 Speaker 1: When people compliment me or say things, I honestly am like, 23 00:01:28,920 --> 00:01:33,319 Speaker 1: oh wow, okay, but that's so I's so honest. 24 00:01:33,360 --> 00:01:33,800 Speaker 3: I love it. 25 00:01:34,160 --> 00:01:39,240 Speaker 1: You and I are both long time spokespeople for the 26 00:01:39,280 --> 00:01:43,600 Speaker 1: American Heart Association. That's why I'm read for you today, Susan. 27 00:01:44,480 --> 00:01:45,240 Speaker 3: That's lovely. 28 00:01:45,760 --> 00:01:49,560 Speaker 1: Yes, I love all the work that you've done. You 29 00:01:49,640 --> 00:01:54,520 Speaker 1: survived a near fatal blocked artery in twenty eighteen and 30 00:01:54,560 --> 00:01:59,640 Speaker 1: then another cardiac situation in twenty nineteen. So did your 31 00:01:59,720 --> 00:02:02,320 Speaker 1: work with the American Heart Association sort of take a 32 00:02:02,360 --> 00:02:06,280 Speaker 1: shift whence that happened and it became just so much 33 00:02:06,320 --> 00:02:07,840 Speaker 1: more important and deeply personal for you? 34 00:02:07,880 --> 00:02:10,000 Speaker 3: I'm sure. Yes. 35 00:02:10,080 --> 00:02:14,720 Speaker 2: I felt after my first term event where I learned 36 00:02:15,000 --> 00:02:17,560 Speaker 2: quite suddenly that I had a ninety percent blockage in 37 00:02:17,600 --> 00:02:20,480 Speaker 2: my main artery and a seventy five percent blockage in 38 00:02:20,480 --> 00:02:23,880 Speaker 2: my adjacent adjacent artery. At the time it was happening, 39 00:02:24,360 --> 00:02:27,200 Speaker 2: I knew what was happening kind of because I had 40 00:02:27,240 --> 00:02:30,079 Speaker 2: heard an interview many years before from a woman, and 41 00:02:30,919 --> 00:02:32,920 Speaker 2: I had no health issues. I had no reason to 42 00:02:32,960 --> 00:02:35,440 Speaker 2: remember this. I mean, years ago, I was still living 43 00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:38,600 Speaker 2: at home. I was probably just out of college, watching 44 00:02:38,960 --> 00:02:41,480 Speaker 2: TV with my dad, and a woman talked about the 45 00:02:41,520 --> 00:02:46,040 Speaker 2: differences between the symptoms that women have for heart attacks 46 00:02:46,040 --> 00:02:49,280 Speaker 2: than men. So I remembered that, so I recognized what 47 00:02:49,320 --> 00:02:52,360 Speaker 2: was happening is what she was telling the world about 48 00:02:52,360 --> 00:02:53,480 Speaker 2: when she did her interview. 49 00:02:53,800 --> 00:02:58,280 Speaker 3: In any case, I had that I did not feel pain. 50 00:02:58,440 --> 00:03:02,360 Speaker 2: I just felt that pressure on my chest radiating around 51 00:03:02,400 --> 00:03:04,600 Speaker 2: my ribcage to my back. I did go to the 52 00:03:04,800 --> 00:03:08,280 Speaker 2: ear at the hospital that my husband's cardiologist met me. 53 00:03:08,680 --> 00:03:10,840 Speaker 2: He had been my husband's doctor. I had no reason 54 00:03:11,560 --> 00:03:15,359 Speaker 2: to have such a doctor. In any case, I went 55 00:03:15,400 --> 00:03:19,560 Speaker 2: to him, and that's when he discovered that by going 56 00:03:19,840 --> 00:03:21,160 Speaker 2: I was avoiding. 57 00:03:20,760 --> 00:03:21,560 Speaker 3: The widow maker. 58 00:03:21,639 --> 00:03:24,800 Speaker 2: The widow maker, Yes, had I been home, they told me, 59 00:03:25,400 --> 00:03:27,280 Speaker 2: I would have just I know that if I had 60 00:03:27,280 --> 00:03:29,560 Speaker 2: been home, I would have just laid thought, I need 61 00:03:29,560 --> 00:03:31,680 Speaker 2: to lay down for a few minutes, have some water, 62 00:03:31,720 --> 00:03:33,960 Speaker 2: and I'll be fine. 63 00:03:34,160 --> 00:03:35,360 Speaker 3: And that kind of. 64 00:03:37,080 --> 00:03:39,800 Speaker 2: Inner voice, and the kind of inner voice that told 65 00:03:39,840 --> 00:03:42,280 Speaker 2: me I have too much to do today. This can't 66 00:03:42,280 --> 00:03:44,280 Speaker 2: be happening. This is my day off. I have no 67 00:03:44,400 --> 00:03:48,200 Speaker 2: time for this. And the inner voice that was telling me, oh, 68 00:03:48,280 --> 00:03:51,080 Speaker 2: I can't bother this spectacular doctor. 69 00:03:51,160 --> 00:03:54,280 Speaker 3: He has patients who really need him. I can't bother him. 70 00:03:54,840 --> 00:03:57,400 Speaker 1: You're so nice, well. 71 00:03:57,600 --> 00:04:01,280 Speaker 2: You know, never having a health issue. I just couldn't 72 00:04:01,320 --> 00:04:04,640 Speaker 2: believe believe it. And it wasn't denial. I just didn't 73 00:04:04,640 --> 00:04:08,080 Speaker 2: take it as seriously as I definitely should have. When 74 00:04:08,120 --> 00:04:10,760 Speaker 2: I found out the results, I was so grateful that 75 00:04:10,840 --> 00:04:13,440 Speaker 2: I had been there that he took the phone call, 76 00:04:13,880 --> 00:04:17,400 Speaker 2: and in any case, I he took me up. 77 00:04:17,360 --> 00:04:19,039 Speaker 3: To ther that night. 78 00:04:19,080 --> 00:04:22,040 Speaker 2: It got to be kind of late and he said, 79 00:04:22,040 --> 00:04:24,680 Speaker 2: I can fix this. I can take you up to 80 00:04:24,720 --> 00:04:27,040 Speaker 2: surgery now. And then it was like nine or ten 81 00:04:27,040 --> 00:04:30,039 Speaker 2: o'clock at night, and he said, or you can come 82 00:04:30,160 --> 00:04:32,960 Speaker 2: back and be first up in the morning at six thirty. 83 00:04:33,000 --> 00:04:35,440 Speaker 2: And I said, well, don't you think I should be 84 00:04:35,480 --> 00:04:37,600 Speaker 2: first up in the morning at six thirty. Your A 85 00:04:37,760 --> 00:04:40,599 Speaker 2: team will be in. They'll be all fresh and ready 86 00:04:40,600 --> 00:04:43,080 Speaker 2: to go. He said, My A team is already on 87 00:04:43,160 --> 00:04:45,599 Speaker 2: their way. I said, well, shouldn't I go home and 88 00:04:45,600 --> 00:04:47,279 Speaker 2: get a good night sleep in my own bed and 89 00:04:47,320 --> 00:04:49,839 Speaker 2: come back and I'll be ready. He said, I don't 90 00:04:49,880 --> 00:04:53,599 Speaker 2: think you quite understand what's going on here. You could 91 00:04:53,640 --> 00:04:57,279 Speaker 2: have a heart attack at any time. So it's really 92 00:04:57,279 --> 00:04:59,120 Speaker 2: good that you came in and now we're going to 93 00:04:59,120 --> 00:05:03,520 Speaker 2: fix it. So he took me upstairs and did the procedure. 94 00:05:03,680 --> 00:05:04,160 Speaker 3: I had two. 95 00:05:04,120 --> 00:05:07,560 Speaker 2: Stents put in. I was just discharged the next day 96 00:05:07,600 --> 00:05:08,279 Speaker 2: before noon. 97 00:05:08,760 --> 00:05:09,000 Speaker 3: Wow. 98 00:05:10,480 --> 00:05:12,800 Speaker 2: My husband came to pick me up, and in the 99 00:05:12,839 --> 00:05:17,680 Speaker 2: car on the way home, I said, Honey, I had 100 00:05:17,720 --> 00:05:21,040 Speaker 2: so much good luck today. I have got to pass 101 00:05:21,120 --> 00:05:24,080 Speaker 2: this on, Jenny. I'm telling you. 102 00:05:24,320 --> 00:05:24,840 Speaker 3: I was like. 103 00:05:26,279 --> 00:05:31,039 Speaker 2: Magnetized to pick up the phone and get my story 104 00:05:31,080 --> 00:05:35,240 Speaker 2: out there. And I called my publicist, Jessica Scotchitano, and 105 00:05:35,279 --> 00:05:37,880 Speaker 2: I asked her, was there somewhere. I was still in 106 00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:40,440 Speaker 2: the car on the way home. I could not not 107 00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:44,680 Speaker 2: pass it forward. It was I couldn't pass the specifics forward, 108 00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:48,680 Speaker 2: but I could pass the takeaways. And I asked Jessica 109 00:05:48,720 --> 00:05:50,800 Speaker 2: if she could help me get my story out in 110 00:05:50,880 --> 00:05:55,320 Speaker 2: modern times, the way that woman's interview helped me from 111 00:05:55,360 --> 00:05:57,600 Speaker 2: so long ago. And she was not a celebrity, and 112 00:05:57,640 --> 00:06:00,920 Speaker 2: I had no health issues, never had reason to remember, 113 00:06:01,160 --> 00:06:03,040 Speaker 2: but it made an impression. I put it back here, 114 00:06:04,360 --> 00:06:07,680 Speaker 2: so I did get to tell my story and tell 115 00:06:07,720 --> 00:06:10,440 Speaker 2: the takeaways in the hopes that even one woman would 116 00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:14,919 Speaker 2: hear it and save her life. The takeaways and I 117 00:06:14,960 --> 00:06:17,440 Speaker 2: write about this in my book just so it's there 118 00:06:17,480 --> 00:06:21,320 Speaker 2: for easy accessibility if somebody wants to know what my 119 00:06:21,640 --> 00:06:25,119 Speaker 2: particular takeaways were that can help them. And the number 120 00:06:25,120 --> 00:06:28,800 Speaker 2: one thing for women that I took away was to 121 00:06:28,839 --> 00:06:32,000 Speaker 2: put yourself on your to do list. I think so 122 00:06:32,160 --> 00:06:35,560 Speaker 2: many times as women, we are taking care of our children. 123 00:06:35,839 --> 00:06:37,400 Speaker 2: My mother said that to me, which you take your 124 00:06:37,440 --> 00:06:39,640 Speaker 2: children as the pediatrician, you go right away. 125 00:06:40,360 --> 00:06:41,080 Speaker 3: I'm your mother. 126 00:06:42,080 --> 00:06:43,880 Speaker 2: You need to go to the doctor and take care 127 00:06:43,880 --> 00:06:46,520 Speaker 2: of this. So put yourself on your to do list. 128 00:06:48,160 --> 00:06:48,840 Speaker 1: Speak up. 129 00:06:49,480 --> 00:06:51,560 Speaker 2: If your body is not performing in a way that 130 00:06:51,680 --> 00:06:56,400 Speaker 2: is normal for you, take action. Call the doctor. And 131 00:06:56,520 --> 00:07:00,120 Speaker 2: number three, don't be afraid that you are disturbing a 132 00:07:00,160 --> 00:07:03,000 Speaker 2: good doctor. Don't be afraid that you are wasting his 133 00:07:03,120 --> 00:07:05,120 Speaker 2: time or he will think that you are a foolish 134 00:07:05,480 --> 00:07:06,120 Speaker 2: Talk to him. 135 00:07:06,400 --> 00:07:06,960 Speaker 3: Tell him. 136 00:07:07,040 --> 00:07:10,000 Speaker 2: Yes, he'll be only too happy to send you home 137 00:07:10,120 --> 00:07:14,000 Speaker 2: or to put stents, do whatever is necessary. Right If 138 00:07:14,040 --> 00:07:16,280 Speaker 2: there's nothing wrong, he'll tell you that too, And won't 139 00:07:16,320 --> 00:07:17,040 Speaker 2: that be a relief. 140 00:07:17,560 --> 00:07:20,240 Speaker 1: I have to tell you that as a woman who 141 00:07:20,280 --> 00:07:24,680 Speaker 1: knows a lot about heart disease, as I've worked, oh 142 00:07:24,720 --> 00:07:29,200 Speaker 1: for a long time, I would still my instinct would be, oh, 143 00:07:29,240 --> 00:07:32,000 Speaker 1: I'll be fine, I'll just you know, lay down for 144 00:07:32,080 --> 00:07:35,960 Speaker 1: a minute and everything will be fine. But and also 145 00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:38,800 Speaker 1: there's that like, if I do go into the emergency 146 00:07:38,880 --> 00:07:41,720 Speaker 1: room or whatever, it's going to be embarrassing when they say, oh, 147 00:07:41,720 --> 00:07:43,840 Speaker 1: it's just gas or it's just you know, all the 148 00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:46,520 Speaker 1: things that they might tell me what it is. But 149 00:07:46,560 --> 00:07:50,400 Speaker 1: I do now believe that it's so important to choose 150 00:07:50,440 --> 00:07:53,320 Speaker 1: yourself and take care of yourself first and foremost, even 151 00:07:53,320 --> 00:07:55,640 Speaker 1: when you're just feeling a little off, because we have 152 00:07:55,720 --> 00:07:58,720 Speaker 1: to listen to our bodies. You're exactly right. And having 153 00:07:58,880 --> 00:08:02,560 Speaker 1: just read your book and being reminded or being actually 154 00:08:02,640 --> 00:08:05,720 Speaker 1: educated to your story and how that happened for you 155 00:08:05,760 --> 00:08:09,760 Speaker 1: in real time was so eye opening for me. It 156 00:08:09,800 --> 00:08:12,280 Speaker 1: was a beautiful reminder and it was just a great 157 00:08:12,320 --> 00:08:16,040 Speaker 1: example of how this could happen to someone that had, 158 00:08:16,400 --> 00:08:20,000 Speaker 1: you know, no health issues. It just came out of nowhere. 159 00:08:20,040 --> 00:08:23,000 Speaker 1: But you then found out that it was in your DNA, 160 00:08:23,160 --> 00:08:25,240 Speaker 1: it was in your genetic makeup from your family. 161 00:08:26,880 --> 00:08:30,120 Speaker 2: Yes, from my dad's side of the family, and my 162 00:08:30,200 --> 00:08:34,640 Speaker 2: otherwise fabulous dad had heart attack because of. 163 00:08:34,600 --> 00:08:35,760 Speaker 3: His calcium build up. 164 00:08:36,120 --> 00:08:38,880 Speaker 2: I think most of us tend to gravitate towards the 165 00:08:38,960 --> 00:08:43,040 Speaker 2: family history on our same sex parent, so that I 166 00:08:43,080 --> 00:08:46,800 Speaker 2: only thought of my mother's side, and there was my dad. 167 00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:51,840 Speaker 1: Well, thank goodness you had that knowledge. So I'm just 168 00:08:51,840 --> 00:08:54,040 Speaker 1: so happy that you're good, you're. 169 00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:56,720 Speaker 3: Thriving, and you too, Jenny. 170 00:08:56,840 --> 00:09:00,560 Speaker 1: Yes, I know it's a scary thing to think about. 171 00:09:00,640 --> 00:09:04,760 Speaker 1: You know, our hearts and it's so important, it's vital 172 00:09:04,840 --> 00:09:08,000 Speaker 1: to our next breath, but we don't really spend a 173 00:09:08,040 --> 00:09:10,520 Speaker 1: lot of time appreciating all the work that it's doing 174 00:09:10,559 --> 00:09:13,400 Speaker 1: every day. So it's it's a lovely reminder for not 175 00:09:13,440 --> 00:09:16,760 Speaker 1: just me, but for all of our listeners to live 176 00:09:16,800 --> 00:09:18,040 Speaker 1: by your example. 177 00:09:18,920 --> 00:09:22,680 Speaker 2: Well and yours, and guess thank you. This is even 178 00:09:22,679 --> 00:09:25,679 Speaker 2: the name of your podcast tells a lot of the story. 179 00:09:25,840 --> 00:09:29,240 Speaker 1: Absolutely, It gives women permission, absolutely, and we need to 180 00:09:29,240 --> 00:09:32,840 Speaker 1: be reminded of that. I think. So. All My Children 181 00:09:33,480 --> 00:09:35,120 Speaker 1: premiered fifty six years ago. 182 00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:36,240 Speaker 3: Isn't that long ago? 183 00:09:36,320 --> 00:09:39,280 Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, Yeah, that seems like a crazy amount 184 00:09:39,320 --> 00:09:41,400 Speaker 1: of time. And you were on the show for four 185 00:09:41,480 --> 00:09:48,200 Speaker 1: decades playing the unimaginably incredible Erica Kane. You really were 186 00:09:48,640 --> 00:09:53,400 Speaker 1: just the biggest star in daytime and it ended so 187 00:09:53,559 --> 00:09:56,000 Speaker 1: abruptly because I just read your book, so I know 188 00:09:56,160 --> 00:09:58,040 Speaker 1: so much about you, which I am so happy to 189 00:09:58,800 --> 00:10:02,880 Speaker 1: but it ended so abruptly. I was wondering what that 190 00:10:02,880 --> 00:10:07,320 Speaker 1: that grief process was like for you, because it was 191 00:10:07,360 --> 00:10:09,760 Speaker 1: such a shock. You called it a divorce. 192 00:10:11,720 --> 00:10:13,640 Speaker 3: Like a nasty divorce. Yeah. 193 00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:17,719 Speaker 1: Yeah, How did you eventually reclaim your power and kind 194 00:10:17,760 --> 00:10:21,640 Speaker 1: of step back into your power after that sort of jolt. 195 00:10:24,600 --> 00:10:28,480 Speaker 2: That process of grieving. And there was a process of grieving. 196 00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:31,199 Speaker 2: There was denial, there was all of it. But there 197 00:10:31,240 --> 00:10:35,679 Speaker 2: was anger in that grieving which I don't have now, 198 00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:39,960 Speaker 2: and I never experienced that kind of anger because if 199 00:10:39,960 --> 00:10:43,199 Speaker 2: we really were all blindsided, we had been told if 200 00:10:43,240 --> 00:10:46,199 Speaker 2: we moved to the show to la and that involved 201 00:10:46,200 --> 00:10:49,440 Speaker 2: a lot, that involved a brooting of people's lives, not 202 00:10:49,559 --> 00:10:53,640 Speaker 2: everybody could do it. Not everybody was clearly invited to 203 00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:57,720 Speaker 2: join the crew, was invited to apply for the job, 204 00:10:58,200 --> 00:11:02,800 Speaker 2: move across country there to apply for the job, yes, 205 00:11:02,920 --> 00:11:06,200 Speaker 2: and children in school and and all that goes with 206 00:11:06,640 --> 00:11:10,800 Speaker 2: living somewhere and then to go be uprooted and then 207 00:11:10,840 --> 00:11:14,199 Speaker 2: not being guaranteed that you would even be employed. 208 00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:16,160 Speaker 3: Yeah, And that. 209 00:11:16,120 --> 00:11:18,680 Speaker 2: Was that was pretty abrupt and then to have the 210 00:11:18,679 --> 00:11:22,360 Speaker 2: abruptness of the show being canceled when there was no 211 00:11:22,520 --> 00:11:24,640 Speaker 2: indication the ratings. 212 00:11:24,240 --> 00:11:26,480 Speaker 3: Had gone down, really for the first time in many years. 213 00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:29,640 Speaker 2: But the writing was different at that time, and the 214 00:11:29,679 --> 00:11:33,320 Speaker 2: audience is very smart, and the audience, you know, would 215 00:11:33,400 --> 00:11:36,280 Speaker 2: would write and all of us as actors, after rehearsal 216 00:11:36,360 --> 00:11:38,720 Speaker 2: in the morning, would say to each other, are you 217 00:11:38,800 --> 00:11:41,840 Speaker 2: having trouble with this? You know the material, and everybody 218 00:11:41,920 --> 00:11:44,679 Speaker 2: hung on and cared so much about their work and 219 00:11:45,000 --> 00:11:49,160 Speaker 2: made it happen. But the audience needs a good story, 220 00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:53,319 Speaker 2: and good storytelling with a respect for the history of 221 00:11:53,360 --> 00:11:58,880 Speaker 2: the characters and their relationships. And in any case, I 222 00:11:58,960 --> 00:12:01,360 Speaker 2: had just been on the book tour for my first book, 223 00:12:01,360 --> 00:12:03,600 Speaker 2: and I had been all around the country and been 224 00:12:04,480 --> 00:12:07,000 Speaker 2: witnessing the same kind of passion from the. 225 00:12:07,040 --> 00:12:09,079 Speaker 3: Viewers that I always had. 226 00:12:09,320 --> 00:12:11,920 Speaker 2: It was really there, and so I was able to 227 00:12:11,920 --> 00:12:15,640 Speaker 2: go back to the studio and tell everyone, how, you know, 228 00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:21,640 Speaker 2: everything was wonderful out there. The reception was spectacular, and 229 00:12:21,640 --> 00:12:24,439 Speaker 2: and then you know, the the. 230 00:12:24,280 --> 00:12:27,120 Speaker 3: Acts fell and we were we were canceled. 231 00:12:27,120 --> 00:12:30,000 Speaker 2: So there was it was you know, again, something has 232 00:12:30,040 --> 00:12:33,120 Speaker 2: to do with your expectation. Of course, the expectation was 233 00:12:33,400 --> 00:12:35,440 Speaker 2: we were doing so well. The fans were there for us. 234 00:12:35,520 --> 00:12:38,800 Speaker 2: In fact, they shut down the computer system at ABC 235 00:12:40,120 --> 00:12:43,720 Speaker 2: when we were canceled. Agnes had told me that she 236 00:12:43,840 --> 00:12:46,240 Speaker 2: called the number and they said this, and I've been 237 00:12:46,240 --> 00:12:48,880 Speaker 2: hearing the sear hearing about it. And then finally I 238 00:12:48,920 --> 00:12:51,560 Speaker 2: just wanted to learn from myself, really, how can this be? 239 00:12:52,000 --> 00:12:54,600 Speaker 2: And I call that number and it said, and I'm 240 00:12:54,640 --> 00:12:57,959 Speaker 2: paraphrasing now, but it was when there were menus when. 241 00:12:57,760 --> 00:13:00,920 Speaker 3: You wanted to learn something, nil the phone. 242 00:13:01,120 --> 00:13:04,720 Speaker 2: And I did, and it said, to register your displeasure 243 00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:09,440 Speaker 2: for the cancelation of all my children, Press one for 244 00:13:09,720 --> 00:13:11,240 Speaker 2: all other ABC. 245 00:13:11,800 --> 00:13:13,240 Speaker 1: Oh, that's so crazy business. 246 00:13:13,559 --> 00:13:18,920 Speaker 3: Press number two. You press one, yes. And then I 247 00:13:18,960 --> 00:13:19,800 Speaker 3: knew it was true. 248 00:13:19,840 --> 00:13:23,520 Speaker 2: And what I had witnessed from the fans, the viewers 249 00:13:23,840 --> 00:13:25,760 Speaker 2: as I went all around the country on that book 250 00:13:25,800 --> 00:13:28,920 Speaker 2: tour of that passion, that enthusiasm was real. 251 00:13:29,480 --> 00:13:32,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's but anyway, I. 252 00:13:32,600 --> 00:13:34,920 Speaker 3: Was called into the producer's office that morning. 253 00:13:35,760 --> 00:13:39,360 Speaker 2: Agnes had given me a heads up call at four 254 00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:42,600 Speaker 2: point thirty in the morning when I went to the studio. 255 00:13:42,640 --> 00:13:45,240 Speaker 3: Indeed, what she said was true. 256 00:13:45,240 --> 00:13:48,360 Speaker 2: I would be called into the producer's office and there 257 00:13:48,480 --> 00:13:51,080 Speaker 2: and the man who was the head of ABC daytime. 258 00:13:51,520 --> 00:13:53,360 Speaker 2: Just the three of us were in the office, and 259 00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:57,720 Speaker 2: I had the opportunity to ask him then directly, you know, 260 00:13:57,760 --> 00:14:02,360 Speaker 2: why are you doing this? And he said, he seemed 261 00:14:02,360 --> 00:14:04,200 Speaker 2: to be very proud of himself. He was doing this 262 00:14:04,240 --> 00:14:08,920 Speaker 2: because it would be forty percent less expensive to produce. 263 00:14:09,559 --> 00:14:18,000 Speaker 1: And that was that forty percent less expensive to produce? Yes, hm, Well, 264 00:14:18,720 --> 00:14:21,760 Speaker 1: that makes me think. We've had several really strong, beautiful, 265 00:14:21,760 --> 00:14:24,080 Speaker 1: confident women that have come on of the pod and 266 00:14:24,120 --> 00:14:27,640 Speaker 1: shared the difficult things that they have heard from, whether 267 00:14:27,680 --> 00:14:31,760 Speaker 1: it was studio executives or directors or acting teachers, whatever 268 00:14:31,880 --> 00:14:35,040 Speaker 1: through the years that gave you that kind of criticism 269 00:14:35,440 --> 00:14:38,240 Speaker 1: when you were breaking into the industry or even well 270 00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:41,760 Speaker 1: established in the industry, How did you find the strength 271 00:14:41,800 --> 00:14:42,600 Speaker 1: to keep going? 272 00:14:43,320 --> 00:14:47,880 Speaker 2: Well, I must say I have been enormously lucky to 273 00:14:48,040 --> 00:14:54,000 Speaker 2: have wonderful teachers and wonderful surrounded by really wonderful people. 274 00:14:54,560 --> 00:14:58,040 Speaker 2: And so maybe that's why this experience being canceled like 275 00:14:58,080 --> 00:15:02,520 Speaker 2: that and blindsided became awakens such an anger in me 276 00:15:02,640 --> 00:15:05,560 Speaker 2: because I wasn't expecting it, and I had no experience 277 00:15:05,600 --> 00:15:09,360 Speaker 2: with it beforehand, very little experience with it beforehand. So 278 00:15:09,400 --> 00:15:13,960 Speaker 2: the strength to keep going after all my children, there 279 00:15:14,040 --> 00:15:15,120 Speaker 2: was a grieving process. 280 00:15:15,120 --> 00:15:19,720 Speaker 3: You know, I wondered, well, now now what will I do? 281 00:15:19,840 --> 00:15:20,880 Speaker 3: Will I ever work again? 282 00:15:21,320 --> 00:15:24,520 Speaker 2: Yes, as I think many of us who are who 283 00:15:24,560 --> 00:15:29,200 Speaker 2: are actors, you know, we think and and so. 284 00:15:29,480 --> 00:15:30,080 Speaker 3: You know, I took. 285 00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:33,600 Speaker 2: I was again so lucky because Mark Terry had actually 286 00:15:33,680 --> 00:15:39,040 Speaker 2: come to the All My Children's studio to to meet me, 287 00:15:39,120 --> 00:15:41,560 Speaker 2: but I wasn't there that day, which was quite unusual. 288 00:15:42,120 --> 00:15:44,440 Speaker 2: But we've met again right after the show is canceled. 289 00:15:45,000 --> 00:15:49,000 Speaker 2: We met again and got along so well. He's so 290 00:15:49,200 --> 00:15:53,200 Speaker 2: charming and wonderful and smart. And then he had a 291 00:15:53,240 --> 00:15:57,160 Speaker 2: new show because the fans again online were asking that 292 00:15:57,280 --> 00:16:01,160 Speaker 2: I go on Desperate Housewives, and I thought it was 293 00:16:01,200 --> 00:16:03,920 Speaker 2: a great idea. When we sat down with Mark, he 294 00:16:04,320 --> 00:16:06,880 Speaker 2: said that it was already it was the finale had 295 00:16:06,920 --> 00:16:10,120 Speaker 2: already been shot. Oh no, so well, the fans and 296 00:16:10,560 --> 00:16:12,800 Speaker 2: we all love the idea, it was just too late. 297 00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:15,880 Speaker 2: But he had a new show in mind called Devious Maids, 298 00:16:16,400 --> 00:16:20,280 Speaker 2: and he thought there'd be a great part in there 299 00:16:20,360 --> 00:16:22,800 Speaker 2: for me, and it turned out to be there was 300 00:16:22,920 --> 00:16:24,320 Speaker 2: So I was very lucky. 301 00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:26,800 Speaker 1: Oh so lucky, And that kind of that momentum just 302 00:16:26,920 --> 00:16:29,920 Speaker 1: kept going for you. Yes, yeah, that really helps take 303 00:16:29,920 --> 00:16:34,520 Speaker 1: the sting off of the cancelation for sure. Yes, And 304 00:16:34,640 --> 00:16:37,480 Speaker 1: ultimately it probably opened up your world. And you know, 305 00:16:37,560 --> 00:16:42,040 Speaker 1: two different categories doing starring in a nighttime show. What 306 00:16:42,120 --> 00:16:45,920 Speaker 1: was the difference for you between doing nighttime television and 307 00:16:46,000 --> 00:16:46,960 Speaker 1: daytime television. 308 00:16:48,560 --> 00:16:52,520 Speaker 2: Well, shooting on film, which is how we shot Devious Maids, 309 00:16:52,920 --> 00:16:54,760 Speaker 2: is very different than shooting on video. 310 00:16:55,360 --> 00:16:56,760 Speaker 3: Sure you know all this, Jenny. 311 00:16:58,000 --> 00:17:00,800 Speaker 2: Shooting on video with all my children, there were three 312 00:17:01,240 --> 00:17:05,000 Speaker 2: sometimes five cameras working all at once, and so they 313 00:17:05,040 --> 00:17:07,880 Speaker 2: were getting the shots and they were moving with each 314 00:17:07,920 --> 00:17:11,560 Speaker 2: of us. In shooting on film, and we would do 315 00:17:11,600 --> 00:17:14,600 Speaker 2: the scene once for the money, so to speak. There 316 00:17:14,680 --> 00:17:17,560 Speaker 2: wasn't the amount of editing and so on in film 317 00:17:17,880 --> 00:17:20,920 Speaker 2: as I know. You know, we shoot with one camera 318 00:17:21,359 --> 00:17:25,320 Speaker 2: and you do the same scene more than once because 319 00:17:25,400 --> 00:17:27,600 Speaker 2: you do it in different sizes, from different points of 320 00:17:27,640 --> 00:17:32,159 Speaker 2: view and so on. But also there's more time for 321 00:17:32,320 --> 00:17:36,960 Speaker 2: rehearsal for the discovery part of the scene and the 322 00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:41,480 Speaker 2: relationship with your acting partner, and that's part of the 323 00:17:41,520 --> 00:17:45,440 Speaker 2: fun and that was always the part that was missing. 324 00:17:45,680 --> 00:17:48,639 Speaker 2: And all my children as actors, we were always trying 325 00:17:48,640 --> 00:17:52,040 Speaker 2: to squeeze in a rehearsal of some kind. In between, 326 00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:54,119 Speaker 2: we'd be in the hair and makeup room and the 327 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:57,600 Speaker 2: hair dryers are going and Jill Larson, who played Opal, 328 00:17:57,640 --> 00:17:58,760 Speaker 2: would be across the way and. 329 00:17:58,720 --> 00:18:01,240 Speaker 3: We were like, okay, can we run lines? Can we? 330 00:18:01,320 --> 00:18:03,200 Speaker 2: And you know you're trying to run the scene that way, 331 00:18:03,400 --> 00:18:06,560 Speaker 2: But with devious mains and with film, it was it 332 00:18:06,600 --> 00:18:08,960 Speaker 2: was really an extra great. 333 00:18:08,720 --> 00:18:11,960 Speaker 3: Pleasure to have the time to rehearse and discover. 334 00:18:13,760 --> 00:18:16,360 Speaker 1: I love that and it is such a different it's 335 00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:21,480 Speaker 1: such a different skill set than daytime. I mean, people 336 00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:25,120 Speaker 1: know by now how difficult it is for daytime actors 337 00:18:25,160 --> 00:18:28,320 Speaker 1: and the rate of speed of which you shoot things, 338 00:18:28,960 --> 00:18:31,280 Speaker 1: the amount of pages you have to learn every day, 339 00:18:31,680 --> 00:18:34,200 Speaker 1: and then going to kind of a slower pace of 340 00:18:34,240 --> 00:18:38,080 Speaker 1: that single camera world must have been kind of nice 341 00:18:38,359 --> 00:18:39,600 Speaker 1: if I think that through. 342 00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:43,680 Speaker 3: Oh, it was. It was a treasure, It really was. 343 00:18:44,400 --> 00:18:48,080 Speaker 2: The amount of material done, the content, the amount of 344 00:18:48,119 --> 00:18:51,399 Speaker 2: the content on film is much less because of shooting 345 00:18:51,440 --> 00:18:55,560 Speaker 2: with one camera at a time, so there's that too, 346 00:18:55,720 --> 00:19:00,119 Speaker 2: much less memorizing content, you know, volume of content to 347 00:19:00,160 --> 00:19:01,040 Speaker 2: memorize every night. 348 00:19:08,440 --> 00:19:10,520 Speaker 1: I know that you have mentors and that you have 349 00:19:10,600 --> 00:19:13,600 Speaker 1: women that you've looked up to along your journey. What 350 00:19:13,640 --> 00:19:17,439 Speaker 1: would you say was something that you remember from a 351 00:19:17,480 --> 00:19:21,760 Speaker 1: mentor of yours that really got you through any difficult 352 00:19:21,760 --> 00:19:22,600 Speaker 1: times in your career. 353 00:19:25,280 --> 00:19:30,280 Speaker 2: I would say more by observation, more by observation than 354 00:19:30,359 --> 00:19:37,120 Speaker 2: direct messages. And I think in general that's how people 355 00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:39,000 Speaker 2: learn more than anything. You know. 356 00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:42,800 Speaker 1: Yes, they say on the job training is the best thing. Yes, 357 00:19:43,240 --> 00:19:47,840 Speaker 1: I believe that too. Even in acting, I had wonderful teachers, 358 00:19:48,200 --> 00:19:53,119 Speaker 1: certainly you know in acting class and so on, but 359 00:19:53,600 --> 00:19:57,840 Speaker 1: also for real life mentoring, it was really much more observing, 360 00:19:58,040 --> 00:20:04,120 Speaker 1: observing having the wonderful opportunity to be to be near 361 00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:10,520 Speaker 1: people like Agnes Nixon. And even when we very first. 362 00:20:10,280 --> 00:20:13,080 Speaker 2: Began on All My Children, and it lasted for several years, 363 00:20:13,560 --> 00:20:17,720 Speaker 2: we used to rehearse the show in order. So we 364 00:20:17,760 --> 00:20:21,760 Speaker 2: did run through, we did a dress rehearsal, we did 365 00:20:21,760 --> 00:20:24,359 Speaker 2: everything in order, and then we would go to shoot 366 00:20:24,400 --> 00:20:24,720 Speaker 2: the show. 367 00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:27,800 Speaker 3: So we did that. But in between the scenes, Erica 368 00:20:27,880 --> 00:20:29,280 Speaker 3: was a very busy character. 369 00:20:29,520 --> 00:20:33,480 Speaker 2: So I almost could never leave this studio floor, and 370 00:20:34,240 --> 00:20:37,120 Speaker 2: I would stay on the set. And so I had 371 00:20:37,160 --> 00:20:39,399 Speaker 2: also the opportunity to listen to some of the more 372 00:20:40,000 --> 00:20:44,000 Speaker 2: experienced actresses like Ruth Warwick who had been at the 373 00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:47,400 Speaker 2: Mercury Theater and a part of Hollywood glamor at his height, 374 00:20:47,880 --> 00:20:51,720 Speaker 2: and Mary Fickett and Frau Heflin, of course, who played 375 00:20:51,760 --> 00:20:55,760 Speaker 2: my mother Mona on All My Children. I had the 376 00:20:55,760 --> 00:20:59,880 Speaker 2: opportunity to listen to them trade stories. I Lean Hurly, 377 00:21:00,560 --> 00:21:05,040 Speaker 2: who had worked with Oh My Goodness, had played Laurence 378 00:21:05,080 --> 00:21:09,520 Speaker 2: Olivier's Gertrude the Mother even though she wasn't old enough, 379 00:21:09,560 --> 00:21:11,760 Speaker 2: but she was a character actress. To listen to them 380 00:21:11,840 --> 00:21:15,320 Speaker 2: all trade stories and to learn from what I was hearing, 381 00:21:16,720 --> 00:21:20,400 Speaker 2: and to listen to Ruth Warick talk about how every 382 00:21:20,400 --> 00:21:23,000 Speaker 2: woman should have a little boy in her life who 383 00:21:23,080 --> 00:21:26,000 Speaker 2: is three or four years old because they just are 384 00:21:26,040 --> 00:21:31,240 Speaker 2: the best and things, and advice on relationships with men, 385 00:21:31,560 --> 00:21:33,680 Speaker 2: even though she had been married a number of times. 386 00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:36,760 Speaker 3: It was just so wonderful. 387 00:21:37,160 --> 00:21:39,960 Speaker 2: To have the opportunity to sit and listen to these 388 00:21:40,280 --> 00:21:43,840 Speaker 2: experienced women and actresses was wonderful. 389 00:21:44,119 --> 00:21:46,399 Speaker 1: I feel like that's the best thing for me that 390 00:21:46,520 --> 00:21:50,760 Speaker 1: came later in life at fifty. After fifty, but I 391 00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:54,399 Speaker 1: feel like this is such a gift to be able 392 00:21:54,440 --> 00:21:58,320 Speaker 1: to surround yourself with other women who have experienced all 393 00:21:58,359 --> 00:22:01,560 Speaker 1: the things and share their stories. That's how we learn, 394 00:22:01,600 --> 00:22:05,800 Speaker 1: that's how we grow, and that's how we inspire people. Yes, 395 00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:11,080 Speaker 1: so that's such an important thing. I really enjoyed reading 396 00:22:11,119 --> 00:22:12,840 Speaker 1: your new book, Laluci. 397 00:22:13,640 --> 00:22:14,080 Speaker 3: Thank you. 398 00:22:14,560 --> 00:22:18,320 Speaker 1: It is very moving. I found myself crying alone in 399 00:22:18,359 --> 00:22:19,360 Speaker 1: my bed last night. 400 00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:20,919 Speaker 3: Oh, thank you. 401 00:22:21,359 --> 00:22:25,680 Speaker 1: So I was very moved absolutely by your book. You 402 00:22:26,720 --> 00:22:31,560 Speaker 1: so beautifully and honestly express your profound loss that you've 403 00:22:31,840 --> 00:22:35,960 Speaker 1: incurred in your life with your husband, your mother, a pregnancy. 404 00:22:37,200 --> 00:22:40,520 Speaker 1: How did how would you say that grief has changed 405 00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:45,520 Speaker 1: the way you listen to yourself and your needs. 406 00:22:47,320 --> 00:22:51,239 Speaker 2: Well, you're right saying it was profound loss, and I 407 00:22:51,280 --> 00:22:55,320 Speaker 2: think I think that as human beings we do experience 408 00:22:55,359 --> 00:22:55,880 Speaker 2: that in life. 409 00:22:55,880 --> 00:22:57,080 Speaker 3: It is part of life. 410 00:22:57,840 --> 00:23:05,080 Speaker 2: Certainly, certainly became more vulnerable, to say the least. I 411 00:23:05,119 --> 00:23:10,720 Speaker 2: had to dig very deeply and did to be able 412 00:23:10,760 --> 00:23:14,920 Speaker 2: to go forward at all after the loss of my husband, 413 00:23:14,960 --> 00:23:16,399 Speaker 2: and I write about that in the book. 414 00:23:17,520 --> 00:23:22,240 Speaker 1: That's the part that got me, just the way you 415 00:23:22,880 --> 00:23:29,040 Speaker 1: so beautifully shared the play by play of that experience. 416 00:23:29,840 --> 00:23:33,440 Speaker 1: And not to mention your miscarriage, but you know, even 417 00:23:33,760 --> 00:23:36,399 Speaker 1: the death of your mom really resounded with me because 418 00:23:36,880 --> 00:23:41,359 Speaker 1: I'm a caregiver for my mom who's in her eighties. Oh, 419 00:23:41,480 --> 00:23:43,520 Speaker 1: so there were so many different levels that I could 420 00:23:43,680 --> 00:23:46,360 Speaker 1: I was really moved. But I just want to say 421 00:23:46,359 --> 00:23:51,720 Speaker 1: thank you for sharing such intimacy with us, the readers. 422 00:23:53,280 --> 00:23:55,600 Speaker 1: It's not often that you feel so moved when you 423 00:23:55,640 --> 00:23:58,520 Speaker 1: read a book like that. And you know, yeah, I 424 00:23:58,640 --> 00:24:02,560 Speaker 1: knew that I was reading reading Susan Lucci's book, but 425 00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:06,280 Speaker 1: I didn't know I was getting to know the real 426 00:24:07,040 --> 00:24:09,720 Speaker 1: Susan Lucci and all the things that he had endured. 427 00:24:10,320 --> 00:24:12,280 Speaker 1: And I really enjoyed it. 428 00:24:12,359 --> 00:24:16,520 Speaker 3: So thank you, Thank you very much. I'm so happy 429 00:24:16,560 --> 00:24:17,440 Speaker 3: to hear you say that. 430 00:24:17,520 --> 00:24:23,600 Speaker 2: And at the same time, yeah, I was so happy 431 00:24:23,600 --> 00:24:26,679 Speaker 2: to be able to talk about Helmet himself. You know, 432 00:24:26,720 --> 00:24:29,560 Speaker 2: I've been interviewed many, many times, but it was an 433 00:24:29,560 --> 00:24:32,280 Speaker 2: opportunity for me to to talk about to let people 434 00:24:32,320 --> 00:24:32,960 Speaker 2: know who. 435 00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:35,200 Speaker 3: It was I was grieving for and. 436 00:24:36,920 --> 00:24:40,040 Speaker 2: With my mom, to talk about our relationship, to talk 437 00:24:40,080 --> 00:24:44,480 Speaker 2: about my dreams when I was beginning the terrible encounter 438 00:24:44,680 --> 00:24:46,600 Speaker 2: when I was twelve years old on the school bus. 439 00:24:47,040 --> 00:24:52,000 Speaker 2: These are all things that are part of our shared humanity. 440 00:24:52,560 --> 00:24:56,480 Speaker 2: And I just think by telling I thought by telling 441 00:24:56,840 --> 00:25:03,320 Speaker 2: these things people reading. We're all human beings and it 442 00:25:03,359 --> 00:25:07,920 Speaker 2: connects us and somehow then I was hoping people won't 443 00:25:07,920 --> 00:25:12,080 Speaker 2: feel so alone in some of their very profound experiences 444 00:25:12,119 --> 00:25:12,840 Speaker 2: in their lives. 445 00:25:14,119 --> 00:25:17,600 Speaker 1: Absolutely. Yeah, the way you describe your relationship with your 446 00:25:17,680 --> 00:25:23,440 Speaker 1: husband with Helmet, I was in awe. 447 00:25:23,280 --> 00:25:23,879 Speaker 3: Of you two. 448 00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:28,480 Speaker 1: It was like a couple goals, you know, beautiful relationship, longstanding, 449 00:25:29,119 --> 00:25:32,760 Speaker 1: and the way you spoke of him so beautifully was 450 00:25:32,840 --> 00:25:36,720 Speaker 1: just really nice. And it reminded me to be grateful 451 00:25:36,880 --> 00:25:40,439 Speaker 1: for what I have in my life, you know, to 452 00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:43,000 Speaker 1: not take things for granted. It really made me stop 453 00:25:43,040 --> 00:25:47,119 Speaker 1: and think about things in a different way than than 454 00:25:47,160 --> 00:25:49,800 Speaker 1: I probably was in the state of mind of thinking 455 00:25:49,840 --> 00:25:54,520 Speaker 1: of them, because I take things for granted. You know, 456 00:25:54,640 --> 00:25:59,480 Speaker 1: we take our relationships for granted, we take our opportunities 457 00:25:59,520 --> 00:26:02,080 Speaker 1: that we're even for granted, all that we you know, 458 00:26:02,119 --> 00:26:04,640 Speaker 1: all that we have. So it was a nice chance 459 00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:07,600 Speaker 1: to kind of just slow down and through your experience 460 00:26:08,520 --> 00:26:14,439 Speaker 1: relate that to my own. You said that you have 461 00:26:14,520 --> 00:26:19,679 Speaker 1: a strong faith, which is very admirable. Everybody has faith 462 00:26:19,720 --> 00:26:24,120 Speaker 1: in their own way. Yes, everyone is different, everyone is different, 463 00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:28,159 Speaker 1: but that the the meaning of you know, the just 464 00:26:28,240 --> 00:26:31,439 Speaker 1: the importance I guess of faith is so that you 465 00:26:31,520 --> 00:26:34,040 Speaker 1: don't feel alone, so that you feel like you were, 466 00:26:34,280 --> 00:26:37,920 Speaker 1: you have support around you. And how I was curious, 467 00:26:38,000 --> 00:26:43,600 Speaker 1: how did your faith evolve after such an unimaginable loss, 468 00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:48,399 Speaker 1: Like what does your your choosing of faith look like 469 00:26:48,560 --> 00:26:50,199 Speaker 1: for you now? And how does it help you? 470 00:26:53,560 --> 00:26:56,959 Speaker 2: I don't know where I'd be without my faith, And 471 00:26:57,000 --> 00:26:58,240 Speaker 2: that took me by surprise. 472 00:26:59,040 --> 00:27:02,520 Speaker 3: Yeah, I was not angry at God. I was. 473 00:27:06,119 --> 00:27:09,480 Speaker 2: So grateful to have had this love in my life, 474 00:27:10,520 --> 00:27:15,040 Speaker 2: so grateful and I say in the book that he 475 00:27:15,119 --> 00:27:18,760 Speaker 2: created Helmet Huber and put him in my life, and 476 00:27:18,880 --> 00:27:23,200 Speaker 2: so grateful for so much. I feel so blessed and 477 00:27:23,280 --> 00:27:27,480 Speaker 2: so gratitude. I think was how it started to evolve. 478 00:27:27,600 --> 00:27:31,159 Speaker 2: I am so grateful that I had my husband had 479 00:27:31,160 --> 00:27:35,160 Speaker 2: a stroke, that I had a month of thirty days 480 00:27:35,200 --> 00:27:38,439 Speaker 2: with him while he was in the hospital fighting for 481 00:27:38,480 --> 00:27:41,879 Speaker 2: his life. But I could be there with him and 482 00:27:42,600 --> 00:27:46,760 Speaker 2: in all that that involved and entailed and became. But 483 00:27:46,880 --> 00:27:49,560 Speaker 2: I knew that I was so lucky to have that 484 00:27:49,720 --> 00:27:53,240 Speaker 2: time with him, that I didn't get a call and 485 00:27:53,560 --> 00:27:56,040 Speaker 2: my heart goes out to a woman or a man 486 00:27:56,040 --> 00:27:59,040 Speaker 2: who gets a call that there's spouse dropped dead. 487 00:27:59,240 --> 00:28:02,520 Speaker 3: On a city street read or whatever that would be sudden. 488 00:28:04,240 --> 00:28:08,040 Speaker 2: So I was grateful for that. One of the songs, 489 00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:13,080 Speaker 2: pieces of music that I asked to have played at 490 00:28:13,119 --> 00:28:19,800 Speaker 2: Helmet's funeral services and had I had to really ask 491 00:28:20,640 --> 00:28:23,760 Speaker 2: firmly for it, was to have. 492 00:28:25,600 --> 00:28:26,600 Speaker 3: This song the prayer. 493 00:28:28,080 --> 00:28:30,680 Speaker 2: I think of the Butcelli recording of that, Andrea Butelli 494 00:28:30,880 --> 00:28:36,320 Speaker 2: recording of that, and there are lyrics in that song 495 00:28:36,840 --> 00:28:42,640 Speaker 2: lead us to your grace that I think those words 496 00:28:42,800 --> 00:28:47,360 Speaker 2: so often, Yes, lead me to your grace and guide 497 00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:50,600 Speaker 2: me because I know that this gift of life is 498 00:28:50,600 --> 00:28:53,280 Speaker 2: a gift. And I will never thought my nose at 499 00:28:53,320 --> 00:28:57,800 Speaker 2: that sad as I am as what happened that you know, 500 00:28:58,360 --> 00:29:00,520 Speaker 2: I lost Helmet, not another and my. 501 00:29:00,520 --> 00:29:03,640 Speaker 3: Brother and so on, But I am alive. 502 00:29:04,080 --> 00:29:08,480 Speaker 2: God has given me this gift and I want to 503 00:29:09,920 --> 00:29:12,520 Speaker 2: I want to make him proud. I want to do 504 00:29:12,600 --> 00:29:15,400 Speaker 2: the best I can with this gift and enjoy life. 505 00:29:15,480 --> 00:29:17,360 Speaker 2: My mother would say, God wants you to be happy, 506 00:29:19,120 --> 00:29:20,480 Speaker 2: and so I want to be. 507 00:29:21,280 --> 00:29:25,120 Speaker 1: Yes, everyone wants to be happy. Everyone wants to be 508 00:29:25,600 --> 00:29:29,400 Speaker 1: free of suffering. And I think when you think about 509 00:29:29,480 --> 00:29:32,400 Speaker 1: humanity as a whole, and even though we're so divided 510 00:29:32,480 --> 00:29:36,040 Speaker 1: and there's so much arguing and ugliness out there right now, 511 00:29:36,800 --> 00:29:43,800 Speaker 1: remembering that we all have the same goal for happiness, yes, 512 00:29:44,840 --> 00:29:47,760 Speaker 1: and just seeing that in other people. So often we 513 00:29:47,840 --> 00:29:49,720 Speaker 1: don't even think that when we look at other people 514 00:29:50,360 --> 00:29:52,240 Speaker 1: about what they want or what they've endured. 515 00:29:52,360 --> 00:29:57,840 Speaker 2: But no, no, and my goodness, there are people around 516 00:29:57,880 --> 00:30:03,240 Speaker 2: the world who are enduring loss and unspeakable things, and 517 00:30:03,800 --> 00:30:07,000 Speaker 2: I know that I know that very well. The thing too, 518 00:30:08,200 --> 00:30:11,400 Speaker 2: that I would hear from from the lovely people who 519 00:30:11,400 --> 00:30:15,320 Speaker 2: would respond on some of my Instagram posts. You know, 520 00:30:15,600 --> 00:30:18,360 Speaker 2: when it's just you going along, you just think it's 521 00:30:18,760 --> 00:30:21,400 Speaker 2: nothing big deal. You know, it's just you and your 522 00:30:21,440 --> 00:30:27,160 Speaker 2: life and your relationship. But people would comment on it 523 00:30:27,200 --> 00:30:29,920 Speaker 2: was a goal for them to have a relationship with 524 00:30:30,000 --> 00:30:35,520 Speaker 2: the man they loved or whoever they loved. That they 525 00:30:35,520 --> 00:30:39,000 Speaker 2: could see it gave them hope for them to see 526 00:30:39,000 --> 00:30:41,800 Speaker 2: the relationship that you know, my husband and I had. 527 00:30:42,080 --> 00:30:44,800 Speaker 2: I didn't even know anyone was watching, you say, or 528 00:30:44,840 --> 00:30:48,680 Speaker 2: looking or caring, but they related it to themselves, and 529 00:30:49,760 --> 00:30:54,120 Speaker 2: that's hopeful in a world that it's so so a 530 00:30:54,120 --> 00:30:55,960 Speaker 2: lot of stuff. 531 00:30:55,640 --> 00:30:59,000 Speaker 3: Going on, it is it's a good thing to know 532 00:30:59,080 --> 00:31:02,000 Speaker 3: that that love exists. It really does. It's not just 533 00:31:02,040 --> 00:31:05,560 Speaker 3: a concept, and it's not just me, you know. 534 00:31:05,760 --> 00:31:17,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's everyone. Yeah, there's something comforting in that for sure. 535 00:31:17,760 --> 00:31:17,960 Speaker 3: Yeah. 536 00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:21,480 Speaker 1: I've read in your book that you sort of tried 537 00:31:21,520 --> 00:31:25,720 Speaker 1: to climb out of your agony by redecorating, renovating your 538 00:31:25,760 --> 00:31:28,640 Speaker 1: family home instead of moving after the loss of your husband, 539 00:31:28,680 --> 00:31:32,520 Speaker 1: which would feel like the you know is sinctually I 540 00:31:32,520 --> 00:31:35,440 Speaker 1: would want to move, but you decided to stay, and 541 00:31:35,480 --> 00:31:38,920 Speaker 1: you decided to honor the home that you brought your 542 00:31:39,000 --> 00:31:44,200 Speaker 1: son from the hospital too. How did that sort of 543 00:31:44,760 --> 00:31:50,640 Speaker 1: rebuilding of your physical space affect you emotionally in. 544 00:31:50,600 --> 00:31:51,440 Speaker 3: A positive way? 545 00:31:52,080 --> 00:31:53,840 Speaker 2: I think has affected me in a positive way in 546 00:31:53,880 --> 00:31:56,000 Speaker 2: a couple of ways. First of all, I knew that 547 00:31:56,040 --> 00:32:01,160 Speaker 2: once that I had to my son and his family 548 00:32:01,680 --> 00:32:06,280 Speaker 2: moved to Miami, I knew there was even more reason 549 00:32:06,280 --> 00:32:09,400 Speaker 2: for me to keep this as home base home, because 550 00:32:09,440 --> 00:32:12,320 Speaker 2: that's what they thought of his home, and even his 551 00:32:12,400 --> 00:32:16,960 Speaker 2: two little ones loved to come to my home, and 552 00:32:17,360 --> 00:32:20,360 Speaker 2: we already had a little history together with the little 553 00:32:20,440 --> 00:32:21,600 Speaker 2: children here in this home. 554 00:32:21,920 --> 00:32:24,240 Speaker 3: All the more reason. But I knew for me to stay. 555 00:32:24,480 --> 00:32:26,000 Speaker 2: How many is to say to me if anything ever 556 00:32:26,040 --> 00:32:27,680 Speaker 2: happens to you, I won't be able to stay in 557 00:32:27,720 --> 00:32:32,520 Speaker 2: this house, and I thought that would probably be me too. 558 00:32:33,280 --> 00:32:35,400 Speaker 2: But instead I didn't feel that way. I just knew 559 00:32:35,400 --> 00:32:40,080 Speaker 2: that I had to I had to do a couple things. 560 00:32:40,120 --> 00:32:42,040 Speaker 2: First of all, there were certain renovations that we had 561 00:32:42,080 --> 00:32:44,680 Speaker 2: talked about and didn't get to and I wanted to 562 00:32:44,720 --> 00:32:45,160 Speaker 2: do those. 563 00:32:45,520 --> 00:32:47,880 Speaker 1: Yeah. 564 00:32:47,080 --> 00:32:51,880 Speaker 3: And then I also knew that I wanted to make. 565 00:32:54,400 --> 00:32:58,960 Speaker 2: The house happy, happy colors happy as I am now 566 00:32:59,320 --> 00:33:03,120 Speaker 2: to be. That would feed me and make me feel 567 00:33:03,120 --> 00:33:07,760 Speaker 2: good about coming into the house. And I'm very happy 568 00:33:07,800 --> 00:33:08,440 Speaker 2: with the outcome. 569 00:33:08,600 --> 00:33:10,880 Speaker 3: But I'm also really happy that I found that I 570 00:33:10,920 --> 00:33:11,560 Speaker 3: could do it. 571 00:33:12,960 --> 00:33:16,560 Speaker 2: I called the contractor we had worked with before. He's spectacular. 572 00:33:16,640 --> 00:33:21,240 Speaker 2: His crew is spectacular. I didn't think The renovation and 573 00:33:21,360 --> 00:33:25,760 Speaker 2: the decorating took about a year and a half. I 574 00:33:25,760 --> 00:33:28,320 Speaker 2: will tell you that I did not want I didn't 575 00:33:28,360 --> 00:33:30,960 Speaker 2: want it to end. I didn't want that crew to leave. 576 00:33:31,280 --> 00:33:36,560 Speaker 2: They were here six days a week. They were spectacular 577 00:33:37,160 --> 00:33:39,720 Speaker 2: and so good at what they do and treated my 578 00:33:39,840 --> 00:33:42,440 Speaker 2: home with as if it was their own home. And 579 00:33:43,120 --> 00:33:47,680 Speaker 2: they would come in the morning, they would leave at night, and. 580 00:33:47,560 --> 00:33:49,200 Speaker 3: They would leave the house spotless. 581 00:33:49,240 --> 00:33:51,560 Speaker 2: They would vacuum on their way out, I mean they 582 00:33:51,560 --> 00:33:56,280 Speaker 2: were calator, yes, and they were so good at what 583 00:33:56,320 --> 00:33:59,800 Speaker 2: they did and what they do. There's skilled professionals, but 584 00:33:59,800 --> 00:34:01,800 Speaker 2: there also artists. 585 00:34:02,040 --> 00:34:03,760 Speaker 3: Thank you very much about their work. 586 00:34:03,840 --> 00:34:06,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, but yeah, but you did it that knowing that, look, 587 00:34:06,600 --> 00:34:08,279 Speaker 1: I can move. 588 00:34:08,080 --> 00:34:10,160 Speaker 3: Forward exactly that I can. 589 00:34:10,280 --> 00:34:14,160 Speaker 2: I certainly had never done the construction project by myself 590 00:34:14,400 --> 00:34:18,040 Speaker 2: without my husband, and so yes, that that. 591 00:34:18,120 --> 00:34:20,600 Speaker 3: Was very positive for me to know that I could 592 00:34:20,600 --> 00:34:21,080 Speaker 3: do that. 593 00:34:21,440 --> 00:34:24,120 Speaker 2: And the day to day things, you know, we divide 594 00:34:24,200 --> 00:34:28,800 Speaker 2: up the workload, you know as couples, and so I 595 00:34:28,800 --> 00:34:33,240 Speaker 2: found myself, you know, doing the things that were relegated 596 00:34:33,239 --> 00:34:35,719 Speaker 2: to my husband, you know, making sure the car was 597 00:34:36,360 --> 00:34:37,440 Speaker 2: running properly and. 598 00:34:37,400 --> 00:34:39,480 Speaker 3: All of those things. And yes, I could do it, 599 00:34:39,480 --> 00:34:42,680 Speaker 3: and yes I can do these things. Yes, it feels so. 600 00:34:44,200 --> 00:34:48,279 Speaker 1: Sort of igniting within when you start really depending on 601 00:34:48,520 --> 00:34:49,080 Speaker 1: just yourself. 602 00:34:50,600 --> 00:34:54,920 Speaker 3: Yes, I would rather not have to, but here we are. 603 00:34:55,200 --> 00:34:59,000 Speaker 1: You know, this is what's happening. So you stepped up 604 00:34:59,040 --> 00:35:02,799 Speaker 1: to the plate. And that's just a sign of your 605 00:35:02,840 --> 00:35:09,160 Speaker 1: beautiful strength from all of your experience. You know, it's 606 00:35:09,239 --> 00:35:11,879 Speaker 1: not easy what you have overcome, and no or. 607 00:35:11,840 --> 00:35:14,320 Speaker 3: What anyone overcomes in that position. 608 00:35:14,640 --> 00:35:18,600 Speaker 2: I will tell you that I knew that I had 609 00:35:18,640 --> 00:35:21,960 Speaker 2: always been a happy person and I always did have resilience. 610 00:35:23,080 --> 00:35:24,959 Speaker 2: I thought it was all gone. I thought it would 611 00:35:25,000 --> 00:35:28,279 Speaker 2: never come back. I was in search of it. I 612 00:35:28,280 --> 00:35:30,680 Speaker 2: met someone who told me, you know, that she made choices. 613 00:35:30,719 --> 00:35:33,480 Speaker 2: I didn't even think I had a choice. The only 614 00:35:33,520 --> 00:35:35,480 Speaker 2: thing I would hope for is that Helmut would come 615 00:35:35,480 --> 00:35:38,160 Speaker 2: walking back through the door. And of course that wasn't 616 00:35:38,200 --> 00:35:38,840 Speaker 2: going to happen. 617 00:35:39,320 --> 00:35:44,200 Speaker 3: But little by little, little by little. 618 00:35:44,880 --> 00:35:47,759 Speaker 2: I was in search of my self that I used 619 00:35:47,800 --> 00:35:51,480 Speaker 2: to be, that I knew I had in me. So 620 00:35:51,560 --> 00:35:54,120 Speaker 2: that was a choice too, not to give up on it, 621 00:35:54,560 --> 00:35:57,239 Speaker 2: not to say, oh, no, it really is all gone. No, 622 00:35:57,360 --> 00:35:59,720 Speaker 2: that's how I felt at the time, But I needed 623 00:35:59,760 --> 00:36:02,399 Speaker 2: to try hard to reclaim it, and I have been 624 00:36:02,440 --> 00:36:06,280 Speaker 2: able to and that makes me happy. 625 00:36:06,440 --> 00:36:06,640 Speaker 3: Yeah. 626 00:36:06,640 --> 00:36:09,279 Speaker 1: I think as women, as we get older, we all 627 00:36:09,360 --> 00:36:15,360 Speaker 1: kind of face that that recognition of how strong we 628 00:36:15,400 --> 00:36:18,640 Speaker 1: are and all the things that we have endured and 629 00:36:18,719 --> 00:36:22,919 Speaker 1: how much we have accomplished. And there's something so sort 630 00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:27,360 Speaker 1: of it ignites your soul to sort of look back, 631 00:36:27,880 --> 00:36:32,160 Speaker 1: and it kind of propels you forward in a very intentional. 632 00:36:31,600 --> 00:36:33,480 Speaker 3: Way, and that, oh, that's so well said. 633 00:36:33,600 --> 00:36:36,160 Speaker 1: Unfortunately, you have to go through loss to get to 634 00:36:36,200 --> 00:36:41,320 Speaker 1: that sometimes most times, honestly, but we get to it. 635 00:36:41,600 --> 00:36:45,920 Speaker 1: So knowing that Susan Luci could do it is going 636 00:36:46,000 --> 00:36:48,319 Speaker 1: to be very helpful and motivational for so many women 637 00:36:48,360 --> 00:36:48,800 Speaker 1: out there. 638 00:36:48,920 --> 00:36:49,279 Speaker 3: Thank you. 639 00:36:49,719 --> 00:36:54,239 Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, You talk about aging lovingly. What does that 640 00:36:54,280 --> 00:36:54,759 Speaker 1: mean to you? 641 00:36:56,120 --> 00:37:01,200 Speaker 2: Yeah, audaciously, not gracefully like that expression. 642 00:37:01,239 --> 00:37:03,120 Speaker 1: I love it that You're like, I'm not going down 643 00:37:03,160 --> 00:37:06,520 Speaker 1: without a fight. That's me. 644 00:37:07,640 --> 00:37:10,719 Speaker 2: No, I'm going to do everything I can to look 645 00:37:10,800 --> 00:37:15,839 Speaker 2: my best, to have to honestly be my best. Keep 646 00:37:15,840 --> 00:37:19,600 Speaker 2: those doctors appointments, keep those those checkups, take care of everything, 647 00:37:20,000 --> 00:37:22,719 Speaker 2: go to the dentist and get your hair done too, 648 00:37:23,239 --> 00:37:24,040 Speaker 2: all of those things. 649 00:37:24,560 --> 00:37:26,759 Speaker 1: It all, it's all part of it. It's all part 650 00:37:26,800 --> 00:37:30,600 Speaker 1: of how we see ourselves. And then that really does 651 00:37:30,800 --> 00:37:32,680 Speaker 1: kind of affect how we walk around in the world. 652 00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:33,560 Speaker 3: So it does. 653 00:37:34,200 --> 00:37:36,319 Speaker 1: It's really easy in that kind of loss and that 654 00:37:36,400 --> 00:37:41,400 Speaker 1: kind of grief that we lose ourselves in that so 655 00:37:41,520 --> 00:37:43,960 Speaker 1: easily and stop taking care of ourselves. 656 00:37:44,719 --> 00:37:47,560 Speaker 3: Yes, and I think some of that is normal. 657 00:37:47,600 --> 00:37:51,440 Speaker 2: As I said earlier, everyone is different and everyone's grief 658 00:37:51,520 --> 00:37:56,399 Speaker 2: is different, and judent I would say for anyone not 659 00:37:56,480 --> 00:38:00,480 Speaker 2: to put any kind of time, schedule, time frame, way 660 00:38:00,520 --> 00:38:03,560 Speaker 2: of behaving, way of thinking, way of speaking. 661 00:38:04,120 --> 00:38:05,920 Speaker 3: Right, you are just an. 662 00:38:05,760 --> 00:38:08,840 Speaker 2: Individual going through this as a human being, and whatever 663 00:38:09,000 --> 00:38:12,520 Speaker 2: is your journey is your journey. Not to take oh 664 00:38:12,560 --> 00:38:14,800 Speaker 2: I have to feel this way today, or this is 665 00:38:14,840 --> 00:38:19,000 Speaker 2: the step I'm in now. No, just I think it's 666 00:38:19,400 --> 00:38:23,400 Speaker 2: I think it's fine too, and maybe even important to 667 00:38:23,640 --> 00:38:25,880 Speaker 2: take that time, that grieving time. 668 00:38:26,360 --> 00:38:30,680 Speaker 3: Yeah, allow it, Allow it, because if you don't allow it, 669 00:38:30,680 --> 00:38:33,200 Speaker 3: it's going to rear its head anyway. 670 00:38:33,520 --> 00:38:35,480 Speaker 1: Yep, It's going to sneak up on you in different 671 00:38:35,520 --> 00:38:36,880 Speaker 1: ways exactly. 672 00:38:37,000 --> 00:38:40,560 Speaker 2: So much better to allow it at your own pace 673 00:38:41,239 --> 00:38:44,759 Speaker 2: and go from there and know that you can come 674 00:38:44,760 --> 00:38:45,640 Speaker 2: out the other side. 675 00:38:45,719 --> 00:38:47,239 Speaker 3: You can. You can make choices. 676 00:38:47,600 --> 00:38:50,719 Speaker 2: Even as I thought I didn't have any choices to make, 677 00:38:51,080 --> 00:38:53,960 Speaker 2: but you can, and you do have those choices to 678 00:38:54,000 --> 00:38:56,879 Speaker 2: make to be happy, not to not to stay. 679 00:38:58,200 --> 00:39:02,799 Speaker 3: Actively grieving all the time. You have a life to live. 680 00:39:02,840 --> 00:39:05,120 Speaker 3: You've been given a great life, you know, Jenny. 681 00:39:05,400 --> 00:39:09,440 Speaker 2: Also, I think that you know when you read, when 682 00:39:09,480 --> 00:39:12,359 Speaker 2: you read someone else's story, I think there is a 683 00:39:12,360 --> 00:39:15,880 Speaker 2: certain level of reading that you also are filling in 684 00:39:15,920 --> 00:39:18,719 Speaker 2: the blanks with your own story or the people in 685 00:39:18,760 --> 00:39:22,040 Speaker 2: your life who might fit whatever you're reading about. And 686 00:39:22,400 --> 00:39:26,040 Speaker 2: I'm thinking that that's what will happen with my book too, 687 00:39:26,520 --> 00:39:29,600 Speaker 2: that by telling very specific details of what I've gone through, 688 00:39:30,120 --> 00:39:31,600 Speaker 2: the reader is smart enough. 689 00:39:31,640 --> 00:39:34,320 Speaker 3: I did not set out to write a self help book. 690 00:39:34,360 --> 00:39:37,359 Speaker 2: I am not qualified, but I do think that by 691 00:39:37,800 --> 00:39:41,680 Speaker 2: telling my story, it connects us to each other, and 692 00:39:43,440 --> 00:39:46,320 Speaker 2: the audience is very smart and smart enough to gather 693 00:39:46,400 --> 00:39:50,000 Speaker 2: what they will from reading and for their own they 694 00:39:50,000 --> 00:39:51,880 Speaker 2: will fill in their own specifics in the blanks. 695 00:39:51,960 --> 00:39:54,360 Speaker 1: Absolutely, it's so beautiful because it just reminds us that 696 00:39:54,360 --> 00:39:56,839 Speaker 1: we're not alone. We're not the only person experiencing these 697 00:39:56,880 --> 00:40:00,000 Speaker 1: things exactly. You have a funny quote in the book 698 00:40:00,000 --> 00:40:03,840 Speaker 1: Bok though all work and no play makes Susan a cranky, 699 00:40:03,920 --> 00:40:07,400 Speaker 1: over caffeinated woman who deserves a vacation and a glassy 700 00:40:07,560 --> 00:40:11,200 Speaker 1: champagne immediately. This is from a whole chapter that you 701 00:40:11,239 --> 00:40:15,400 Speaker 1: write about the importance of play. Is it important to 702 00:40:15,560 --> 00:40:18,759 Speaker 1: play for you even as grown ups and keep that 703 00:40:18,840 --> 00:40:19,600 Speaker 1: fun spirit? 704 00:40:19,640 --> 00:40:22,239 Speaker 3: And how do we do that? How did you do that? 705 00:40:23,760 --> 00:40:27,399 Speaker 2: Okay, so some of it must certainly be just a band, 706 00:40:27,480 --> 00:40:31,919 Speaker 2: a certain you know, personality bent. But also I feel 707 00:40:31,960 --> 00:40:33,080 Speaker 2: so lucky and I say this in. 708 00:40:33,000 --> 00:40:36,040 Speaker 3: The book, to be in a profession that encourages play. 709 00:40:35,840 --> 00:40:39,160 Speaker 1: Right, it's what we do, It's what we're very lucky. 710 00:40:39,200 --> 00:40:42,560 Speaker 2: We are very lucky, and to carry some of that 711 00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:45,040 Speaker 2: with us. You know, there's a time and a place, 712 00:40:45,120 --> 00:40:47,480 Speaker 2: and you can make the time and the place too, 713 00:40:47,480 --> 00:40:49,560 Speaker 2: And don't forget to make time and a place to 714 00:40:51,480 --> 00:40:55,160 Speaker 2: you know, to play, to dance, to sing, to be 715 00:40:55,280 --> 00:40:58,840 Speaker 2: with friends and laugh, to travel, if that's. 716 00:40:58,719 --> 00:41:01,360 Speaker 3: What you want to do to I don't know, giggle 717 00:41:01,800 --> 00:41:02,680 Speaker 3: you have a good time. 718 00:41:02,840 --> 00:41:05,319 Speaker 1: Those all beckon back to the power of choice. We 719 00:41:05,440 --> 00:41:10,600 Speaker 1: have the power to choose day to day how we 720 00:41:10,680 --> 00:41:12,200 Speaker 1: want our life to feel. 721 00:41:12,239 --> 00:41:15,600 Speaker 2: And I love that you said day to day. I 722 00:41:15,600 --> 00:41:18,120 Speaker 2: do believe taking it one day at a time. And 723 00:41:18,239 --> 00:41:20,160 Speaker 2: if you're having a good time today and you make 724 00:41:20,200 --> 00:41:24,520 Speaker 2: a plan to look forward to maybe next week, you 725 00:41:24,560 --> 00:41:28,040 Speaker 2: can definitely keep playing alive in your life. 726 00:41:28,560 --> 00:41:33,200 Speaker 1: Yes, well, speaking of playing, I'm wondering what are you dating? 727 00:41:33,320 --> 00:41:35,600 Speaker 1: Are you? Are you ever? What's going to happen? 728 00:41:35,680 --> 00:41:36,040 Speaker 3: Are you? 729 00:41:36,120 --> 00:41:38,359 Speaker 1: Do you think does your daughter want you today? How 730 00:41:38,400 --> 00:41:40,760 Speaker 1: do you feel about that idea? 731 00:41:41,800 --> 00:41:45,239 Speaker 2: You know, I'm at a place where we'll just have 732 00:41:45,320 --> 00:41:47,400 Speaker 2: to see you know, well, what happens. 733 00:41:47,719 --> 00:41:52,160 Speaker 3: I have not met anyone, and I'm not dating, per se. 734 00:41:52,440 --> 00:41:58,080 Speaker 2: I have friends, and that's great. I don't think we 735 00:41:58,120 --> 00:42:01,239 Speaker 2: are meant to be alone. I think life is set 736 00:42:01,320 --> 00:42:06,640 Speaker 2: up that it's it's certainly much more fun to share, yeah, 737 00:42:07,280 --> 00:42:11,239 Speaker 2: good life with someone that you care about. So you know, 738 00:42:11,400 --> 00:42:15,799 Speaker 2: we'll see I heard the expression recently hopeful romantic. I 739 00:42:15,840 --> 00:42:18,920 Speaker 2: say in the book. I am a romantic for sure, 740 00:42:19,400 --> 00:42:22,439 Speaker 2: and I guess a hopeful romantic. Not at the place 741 00:42:22,440 --> 00:42:25,960 Speaker 2: where I can actually, you know, name a name or 742 00:42:26,000 --> 00:42:29,200 Speaker 2: see a person. But we'll see what happens. 743 00:42:29,600 --> 00:42:32,720 Speaker 1: I love that. I love that mindset. It's very healthy. 744 00:42:33,400 --> 00:42:37,400 Speaker 1: Oh good, it's yeah, I'm excited for your future. I 745 00:42:37,400 --> 00:42:39,359 Speaker 1: don't know what's going to happen. You don't know what's 746 00:42:39,400 --> 00:42:42,320 Speaker 1: going to happen, thank you. That's the exciting part of 747 00:42:42,360 --> 00:42:46,360 Speaker 1: it all. But I do know your book Lalucci is 748 00:42:47,440 --> 00:42:51,320 Speaker 1: out now. It's available everybody listening, wherever you buy your books. 749 00:42:52,080 --> 00:42:54,680 Speaker 1: And I just really enjoyed this conversation. But before I 750 00:42:54,760 --> 00:42:59,160 Speaker 1: let you go, Susan Lucci, what was your last I 751 00:42:59,320 --> 00:43:00,840 Speaker 1: choose me moment? 752 00:43:01,840 --> 00:43:06,120 Speaker 2: You know, on different levels, I mean certainly of great facial, 753 00:43:06,560 --> 00:43:08,200 Speaker 2: great manicure, whatever. 754 00:43:08,960 --> 00:43:11,480 Speaker 3: Yes, definitely, but those are just scheduled in. 755 00:43:12,920 --> 00:43:18,400 Speaker 2: But something that is doing my workout every morning, my 756 00:43:18,440 --> 00:43:22,440 Speaker 2: ploates workout. Actually, I'm augmenting it right now. This morning, 757 00:43:22,480 --> 00:43:25,680 Speaker 2: I've added weights. I'm adding weights, I'm eating more protein 758 00:43:26,280 --> 00:43:30,400 Speaker 2: because it's also because pilates is spectacular in many ways 759 00:43:30,640 --> 00:43:32,799 Speaker 2: for stretching, for core strength and so on. 760 00:43:33,120 --> 00:43:38,760 Speaker 3: But in the vein of strength, I've added some weights and. 761 00:43:40,120 --> 00:43:42,759 Speaker 2: It takes maybe a few more minutes to incorporate all 762 00:43:42,760 --> 00:43:44,359 Speaker 2: of that, but I am doing that. 763 00:43:44,480 --> 00:43:46,600 Speaker 3: I'm choosing me in that respect. 764 00:43:47,080 --> 00:43:49,239 Speaker 1: Did you work out with an instructor or? 765 00:43:49,600 --> 00:43:50,360 Speaker 3: No? I did. 766 00:43:50,840 --> 00:43:53,560 Speaker 2: I started pilates in my forties. I wish I had 767 00:43:53,560 --> 00:43:57,799 Speaker 2: started earlier because it's that mind body spirit connection that 768 00:43:58,080 --> 00:44:01,240 Speaker 2: is true. It's not just some new age kind of thinking. 769 00:44:01,920 --> 00:44:04,759 Speaker 2: You really do get very in touch with your your 770 00:44:05,480 --> 00:44:09,719 Speaker 2: mind and your body, and the spirit rises because you 771 00:44:09,760 --> 00:44:13,480 Speaker 2: feel so good. It has that side effect and helps 772 00:44:13,520 --> 00:44:17,600 Speaker 2: you to manage any kind of stress much better, I think, 773 00:44:18,000 --> 00:44:22,319 Speaker 2: And so so that's that's it. 774 00:44:24,000 --> 00:44:26,879 Speaker 1: Great advice. What an honor of this conversation has been. 775 00:44:27,000 --> 00:44:30,080 Speaker 1: Thank you so much for joining me, Susan Luci. 776 00:44:30,920 --> 00:44:34,560 Speaker 2: Thank you so much, and continue success with your clothing line. 777 00:44:34,800 --> 00:44:36,760 Speaker 1: Oh, thank you QVC's sister. 778 00:44:37,400 --> 00:44:39,360 Speaker 3: Yes, you do such a great job. 779 00:44:39,719 --> 00:44:40,200 Speaker 1: Thank you. 780 00:44:40,600 --> 00:44:41,560 Speaker 3: You're so welcome. 781 00:44:41,800 --> 00:44:42,600 Speaker 1: I appreciate that. 782 00:44:42,640 --> 00:44:45,080 Speaker 3: Thank you, of course. Thank you so much, Jenny. I've 783 00:44:45,120 --> 00:44:45,960 Speaker 3: loved talking to you.