1 00:00:19,239 --> 00:00:21,720 Speaker 1: Hello, everyone, it's your girl Cheekies, and you've reached the 2 00:00:21,760 --> 00:00:24,200 Speaker 1: voicemail box for Dear Cheekies, I'm here to give you 3 00:00:24,200 --> 00:00:27,160 Speaker 1: advice on anything and everything you need help with. Maybe 4 00:00:27,160 --> 00:00:29,319 Speaker 1: you're going through a breakup, maybe you're having issues with 5 00:00:29,360 --> 00:00:32,159 Speaker 1: your family, or maybe you need help figuring out how 6 00:00:32,159 --> 00:00:34,640 Speaker 1: to balance your checkbook or how to start a business, 7 00:00:34,960 --> 00:00:38,120 Speaker 1: whatever the cases, I want to hear from you. Remember 8 00:00:38,240 --> 00:00:40,599 Speaker 1: these are my thoughts and opinions, and if you're suffering 9 00:00:40,640 --> 00:00:42,800 Speaker 1: from an issue or hardship, you should seek help from 10 00:00:42,800 --> 00:00:45,760 Speaker 1: a qualified professional. All right, now, go ahead and leave 11 00:00:45,800 --> 00:00:49,479 Speaker 1: your question at the sound of the beat. Hey Cheekies, 12 00:00:49,600 --> 00:00:53,160 Speaker 1: I met you last year, and girl, you are gorgeous. 13 00:00:53,640 --> 00:00:56,600 Speaker 1: My question is how do you overcome being so sensitive 14 00:00:56,640 --> 00:00:58,880 Speaker 1: and so emotional. Not that I hate the way that 15 00:00:58,920 --> 00:01:03,880 Speaker 1: I am, because I have a heart of gold, Ikomi Mama, 16 00:01:04,120 --> 00:01:06,880 Speaker 1: but I can't communicate my feelings. I can't have those 17 00:01:06,920 --> 00:01:10,520 Speaker 1: type of conversations without crying, and I feel like I 18 00:01:10,560 --> 00:01:13,560 Speaker 1: don't get taken very seriously, or my emotions don't get 19 00:01:13,560 --> 00:01:16,600 Speaker 1: taken very seriously because I literally cry every single time, 20 00:01:16,880 --> 00:01:20,360 Speaker 1: and that kind of interferes with me communicating. So I 21 00:01:20,400 --> 00:01:22,520 Speaker 1: just kind of want to learn how to control my 22 00:01:22,560 --> 00:01:25,280 Speaker 1: emotions a little more and how to work on that. 23 00:01:25,600 --> 00:01:30,919 Speaker 1: I hope you can help love your girl, buy Jocelyn 24 00:01:31,160 --> 00:01:34,560 Speaker 1: girl coming from a cancer, because you know that's I'm 25 00:01:34,600 --> 00:01:38,360 Speaker 1: a cancer and I'm very sensitive and I wear my 26 00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:42,039 Speaker 1: emotions on my sleeve. And before certain people would make 27 00:01:42,080 --> 00:01:44,160 Speaker 1: me feel like it was a bad thing that I 28 00:01:44,200 --> 00:01:47,119 Speaker 1: was sensitive, And throughout the years, I've realized that it's 29 00:01:47,160 --> 00:01:50,120 Speaker 1: a good thing. Imagine if we were coldhearted and we 30 00:01:50,160 --> 00:01:54,000 Speaker 1: didn't feel anything, I'd much rather feel my feelings and 31 00:01:54,360 --> 00:01:56,200 Speaker 1: be the way that I am. And yes, I would 32 00:01:56,280 --> 00:01:58,720 Speaker 1: cry a lot more before during conversations. I think there's 33 00:01:58,760 --> 00:02:01,240 Speaker 1: a lot of strength in vuln or. And I think 34 00:02:01,320 --> 00:02:04,360 Speaker 1: once you start seeing it for that and seeing the 35 00:02:04,520 --> 00:02:09,919 Speaker 1: good that it is to be sensitive, and you see 36 00:02:09,919 --> 00:02:13,400 Speaker 1: it more of a pro versus a con I think 37 00:02:13,400 --> 00:02:15,400 Speaker 1: it just something switches in your head. It's kind of like, 38 00:02:15,440 --> 00:02:18,280 Speaker 1: you know what, people that really love me are going 39 00:02:18,320 --> 00:02:22,360 Speaker 1: to appreciate my sensitivity. I think it's because sometimes confrontation 40 00:02:22,480 --> 00:02:25,000 Speaker 1: is scary, and you know, when you're expressing your feelings 41 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:28,200 Speaker 1: and you cry, and there's nothing wrong with crying. I think, 42 00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:30,160 Speaker 1: if anything, it's really good for the soul. It's good 43 00:02:30,200 --> 00:02:32,640 Speaker 1: for cleansing the soul, and it shows that you have 44 00:02:32,760 --> 00:02:35,320 Speaker 1: a good heart. So don't see it as a bad thing. 45 00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:38,280 Speaker 1: And with time it will get better, like you'll cry 46 00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:41,520 Speaker 1: less when you are having hard conversations, but for now 47 00:02:41,600 --> 00:02:44,519 Speaker 1: it's okay to cry. Just see it as a beautiful 48 00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:47,280 Speaker 1: thing that you have. That's what helped me a lot, 49 00:02:47,360 --> 00:02:52,640 Speaker 1: So hopefully it helps you. And it's better than having 50 00:02:52,680 --> 00:02:56,000 Speaker 1: a dark, black soul that doesn't feel anything. Okay, so 51 00:02:56,400 --> 00:02:58,880 Speaker 1: I feel you grow, I got you, so hopefully that 52 00:02:59,000 --> 00:03:00,600 Speaker 1: helped justin Thank you so much for your question, and 53 00:03:00,639 --> 00:03:02,679 Speaker 1: thank you for telling me that I'm beautiful, that I'm gorgeous. 54 00:03:02,800 --> 00:03:08,360 Speaker 1: Thank you, mama. Okay, so next up is a question 55 00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:14,400 Speaker 1: from Kendra hatchigging hope everything is well. So I'm just 56 00:03:14,639 --> 00:03:18,280 Speaker 1: here to get your advice. I've been a situation right 57 00:03:18,280 --> 00:03:23,120 Speaker 1: now where I think that to the whole world it 58 00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:29,200 Speaker 1: might look weird and strange and awkward, but to me 59 00:03:29,240 --> 00:03:33,320 Speaker 1: it's just perfect. So I have been dating my mom's 60 00:03:33,360 --> 00:03:36,400 Speaker 1: cousin for about I want to say, about a year 61 00:03:36,400 --> 00:03:39,840 Speaker 1: and a half now, and I've never been happier. You know, 62 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:44,920 Speaker 1: I was once married for ten years and I felt 63 00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:49,119 Speaker 1: like I was miserable, and now I've found this guy 64 00:03:49,200 --> 00:03:53,520 Speaker 1: and it's like technically my ap Prince Charming, but there's 65 00:03:53,520 --> 00:03:57,040 Speaker 1: a problem. He happens to be my mom's cousin, and 66 00:03:57,120 --> 00:03:59,000 Speaker 1: it seems like it's the end of the world to 67 00:03:59,080 --> 00:04:02,520 Speaker 1: the whole family. And I'm okay with that. I don't 68 00:04:02,560 --> 00:04:04,840 Speaker 1: care what people have to say about me, you know, 69 00:04:04,960 --> 00:04:07,839 Speaker 1: as long as I'm happy. But I'm at the point 70 00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:10,240 Speaker 1: right now where it's time for me to tell my dad, 71 00:04:10,360 --> 00:04:12,240 Speaker 1: and I just don't know how to tell him because 72 00:04:12,240 --> 00:04:16,320 Speaker 1: he's a machista. He has always you know, he's always 73 00:04:16,320 --> 00:04:18,120 Speaker 1: going by the book, and I'm at this point. I'm 74 00:04:18,160 --> 00:04:19,960 Speaker 1: just like, I don't know what to do or I 75 00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:22,880 Speaker 1: don't know how to tell him. Please help love you chickies, 76 00:04:23,120 --> 00:04:28,920 Speaker 1: keep shining. Okay, Kendra, Well, I've never I've never gotten 77 00:04:29,160 --> 00:04:33,480 Speaker 1: a question like this. But the good thing is you 78 00:04:33,520 --> 00:04:36,560 Speaker 1: don't care what anyone has to say. You are living 79 00:04:36,600 --> 00:04:39,159 Speaker 1: your life, and you are from what it seems like 80 00:04:39,200 --> 00:04:42,000 Speaker 1: to be in love. And well, your question is how 81 00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:45,080 Speaker 1: you're going to tell your dad. I think that maybe 82 00:04:45,160 --> 00:04:49,360 Speaker 1: writing a letter. I've always found writing to help me, 83 00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:53,360 Speaker 1: especially when it's a little bit harder to express myself 84 00:04:53,400 --> 00:04:56,599 Speaker 1: in person. I'll write an email or I'll write like 85 00:04:56,640 --> 00:05:02,800 Speaker 1: a handwritten letter. You have to also expect his resistance 86 00:05:03,080 --> 00:05:04,920 Speaker 1: and be okay with that. And it seems like your 87 00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:06,520 Speaker 1: personality is kind of like I'm gonna do what I want. 88 00:05:06,520 --> 00:05:09,360 Speaker 1: I don't care what anyone says, so that is a 89 00:05:09,360 --> 00:05:12,280 Speaker 1: good thing as well. But also I think you also 90 00:05:12,320 --> 00:05:16,440 Speaker 1: have to kind of understand where everyone else is coming from, 91 00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:19,960 Speaker 1: their concerns and things like that, and just be sensitive 92 00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:23,040 Speaker 1: to that as well, and be considered of everyone else's feelings. 93 00:05:23,080 --> 00:05:24,839 Speaker 1: If your dad is a little resistant, I think you 94 00:05:24,920 --> 00:05:26,560 Speaker 1: just have to kind of take it a little bit, 95 00:05:26,920 --> 00:05:29,720 Speaker 1: but do it. I'm always a type of person that says, 96 00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:32,920 Speaker 1: do it with fear and you're gonna feel better. You're 97 00:05:32,920 --> 00:05:34,400 Speaker 1: gonna feel better once you let it out and you 98 00:05:34,480 --> 00:05:37,119 Speaker 1: just let him know. And just one last thing, Kendra, 99 00:05:37,560 --> 00:05:40,800 Speaker 1: just understand that if you do decide to write the letter, 100 00:05:41,120 --> 00:05:43,760 Speaker 1: just know that he'll probably need some time to process it, 101 00:05:43,839 --> 00:05:46,560 Speaker 1: so he probably won't respond right away. But as long 102 00:05:46,600 --> 00:05:48,280 Speaker 1: as you know for sure he gets the letter, he 103 00:05:48,320 --> 00:05:51,440 Speaker 1: reads it. And you have to respect everyone else's decisions 104 00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:55,960 Speaker 1: as well. If they decide to create space between you two, 105 00:05:56,320 --> 00:05:59,240 Speaker 1: I think we have to just be respectful of everyone's 106 00:05:59,240 --> 00:06:05,920 Speaker 1: feelings involved, you know. Wishing you the best and thank 107 00:06:05,960 --> 00:06:15,880 Speaker 1: you for your question. Now let's hear from cheating. Hi chickies. 108 00:06:16,080 --> 00:06:18,640 Speaker 1: I just want to let you know that you're such 109 00:06:18,680 --> 00:06:21,960 Speaker 1: a beautiful soul. I love you. My question is what 110 00:06:22,520 --> 00:06:26,960 Speaker 1: advice can you give me about wanting to go to 111 00:06:27,040 --> 00:06:31,680 Speaker 1: the gym? But I'm very self conscious. I'm worry about 112 00:06:31,960 --> 00:06:35,520 Speaker 1: people around me watching, you know, me being at the 113 00:06:35,600 --> 00:06:38,640 Speaker 1: gym and I knowing what I'm doing. But I want 114 00:06:38,720 --> 00:06:41,560 Speaker 1: to start going, and I know that I have the 115 00:06:41,640 --> 00:06:48,640 Speaker 1: support system because my fiance currently started going and he 116 00:06:48,760 --> 00:06:51,760 Speaker 1: wants me to go, but he's not pushing it because 117 00:06:51,800 --> 00:06:54,440 Speaker 1: he knows that I'm a little shy bug and I'm 118 00:06:54,480 --> 00:06:58,640 Speaker 1: a little bit self conscious about people around me. So 119 00:06:58,720 --> 00:07:04,200 Speaker 1: what advice can you give me about starting or wanting 120 00:07:04,240 --> 00:07:08,640 Speaker 1: to go work out at the gym? Hi Gigi, Thank 121 00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:12,160 Speaker 1: you so much, Mama, thank you for your question. Look, 122 00:07:12,240 --> 00:07:14,560 Speaker 1: I totally get it. I think sometimes going to the 123 00:07:14,600 --> 00:07:17,320 Speaker 1: gym as a woman is very intimidating. We think about 124 00:07:17,320 --> 00:07:19,680 Speaker 1: what are we gonna wear, what are the guys gonna think, 125 00:07:19,680 --> 00:07:21,160 Speaker 1: what are the girls gonna think? I get it when 126 00:07:21,200 --> 00:07:23,040 Speaker 1: I started going to the gym, That's how I felt. 127 00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:26,520 Speaker 1: There are alternatives. Though I started going to it was 128 00:07:26,560 --> 00:07:28,840 Speaker 1: an all women's gym, and that kind of helped me 129 00:07:28,920 --> 00:07:31,680 Speaker 1: like ease my weight into it. Maybe try finding in 130 00:07:31,680 --> 00:07:34,679 Speaker 1: your area like an all women's type of gym. Also, 131 00:07:34,760 --> 00:07:36,720 Speaker 1: there are a lot of apps, Like you said, I 132 00:07:36,720 --> 00:07:38,560 Speaker 1: don't know what I'm doing, like especially like on the 133 00:07:38,600 --> 00:07:41,400 Speaker 1: machines and stuff. There are a lot of fitness apps 134 00:07:41,440 --> 00:07:43,160 Speaker 1: that teach you how to use the machines or how 135 00:07:43,160 --> 00:07:45,800 Speaker 1: to use dumbbells like the free weights. That will also 136 00:07:45,880 --> 00:07:48,440 Speaker 1: help so you don't feel like weird. But I think 137 00:07:48,480 --> 00:07:51,720 Speaker 1: you should start just by doing cardio, maybe going to 138 00:07:51,720 --> 00:07:54,480 Speaker 1: the gym with your boyfriend and choosing a more private 139 00:07:54,520 --> 00:07:57,200 Speaker 1: type of area where they have because there is like 140 00:07:57,240 --> 00:07:59,840 Speaker 1: a lot of people do more weights than they do cardio. 141 00:08:00,080 --> 00:08:02,640 Speaker 1: So anyways, my suggestion would be for you to start 142 00:08:02,680 --> 00:08:06,960 Speaker 1: doing cardio and getting familiar with the ambiance of being 143 00:08:06,960 --> 00:08:09,760 Speaker 1: in the gym and what it feels like, you know 144 00:08:09,760 --> 00:08:12,800 Speaker 1: what I mean, and then slowly but surely start getting 145 00:08:12,800 --> 00:08:15,880 Speaker 1: into weights. I think just taking that lab of faith 146 00:08:15,880 --> 00:08:19,320 Speaker 1: and saying I'm gonna do it. You may think everyone's 147 00:08:19,360 --> 00:08:21,240 Speaker 1: looking at me, But I think that's just in our mind. 148 00:08:21,760 --> 00:08:23,720 Speaker 1: Have some headphones on. That's what I always do it. 149 00:08:23,800 --> 00:08:25,280 Speaker 1: I put on some big gass headphones when I go 150 00:08:25,320 --> 00:08:27,240 Speaker 1: to the gym, on mic, so everyone else don't bother me. 151 00:08:27,320 --> 00:08:29,360 Speaker 1: I'm here to do what I gotta do. And believe me, 152 00:08:29,440 --> 00:08:32,880 Speaker 1: everyone is in their own world. So I think it's 153 00:08:32,920 --> 00:08:35,040 Speaker 1: just probably because you're shy. You know, you think, oh 154 00:08:35,040 --> 00:08:36,600 Speaker 1: my god, they're looking at me, they're making fun of me. 155 00:08:36,640 --> 00:08:39,839 Speaker 1: But little by little, start working on that affirmations, and 156 00:08:40,320 --> 00:08:43,760 Speaker 1: you know, that'll all help you become more confident within 157 00:08:43,840 --> 00:08:45,680 Speaker 1: yourself as well, so that you can go to the 158 00:08:45,679 --> 00:08:48,319 Speaker 1: gym and not worry about what everyone else is doing because, 159 00:08:48,320 --> 00:08:51,520 Speaker 1: believe me, grow they're doing their own thing. So start 160 00:08:51,520 --> 00:08:55,480 Speaker 1: with cardio and just do it. Just go, don't think 161 00:08:55,520 --> 00:08:57,600 Speaker 1: about what can go wrong. Just say I got to 162 00:08:57,600 --> 00:09:00,240 Speaker 1: do this for myself. This is good for my health. 163 00:09:00,320 --> 00:09:02,480 Speaker 1: From my heart, I want to feel better, I want 164 00:09:02,480 --> 00:09:05,040 Speaker 1: to look better, and just fucking do it. Just do it. 165 00:09:05,200 --> 00:09:07,679 Speaker 1: I hope that you do it. Next time I hear 166 00:09:07,720 --> 00:09:09,080 Speaker 1: from you, you better have gone to the gym at 167 00:09:09,120 --> 00:09:16,160 Speaker 1: least five times. Okay, okay, honestly, you guys, hearing from 168 00:09:16,200 --> 00:09:19,840 Speaker 1: you is my favorite and I cannot wait to hear 169 00:09:20,280 --> 00:09:22,560 Speaker 1: from more of you. So don't forget to leave me 170 00:09:22,880 --> 00:09:27,080 Speaker 1: your questions and dilemmas at speakpipe dot com, slash Cheeks 171 00:09:27,080 --> 00:09:29,440 Speaker 1: and Chill podcast. I really will do my best to 172 00:09:29,480 --> 00:09:33,120 Speaker 1: give you my best advice. Okay, until next time, rosciamocho. 173 00:09:41,679 --> 00:09:44,839 Speaker 1: This is a production of iHeartRadio and the Michael Duda 174 00:09:44,920 --> 00:09:48,720 Speaker 1: podcast Network. Follow us on Instagram at Michael Dura Podcasts 175 00:09:48,760 --> 00:09:53,400 Speaker 1: and follow me cheekies that's cchi Quis. For more podcasts 176 00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:57,440 Speaker 1: from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcast, or wherever 177 00:09:57,520 --> 00:10:00,280 Speaker 1: you listen to your favorite podcast, and check us out 178 00:10:00,320 --> 00:10:02,360 Speaker 1: on YouTube.