1
00:00:00,160 --> 00:00:03,040
Speaker 1: This is Cowboy Sam and this is ye how John,

2
00:00:03,240 --> 00:00:06,640
Speaker 1: and we've last owed in some amazing stories for y'all

3
00:00:06,680 --> 00:00:08,680
Speaker 1: the Okay Storytime podcasts.

4
00:00:08,680 --> 00:00:09,600
Speaker 2: But before that we got.

5
00:00:09,680 --> 00:00:12,480
Speaker 1: To wrangle a quick little two minute out break from

6
00:00:12,520 --> 00:00:13,760
Speaker 1: those bucking sponsors.

7
00:00:13,800 --> 00:00:16,079
Speaker 2: We bucking love so much they paid us the bucks

8
00:00:16,120 --> 00:00:19,320
Speaker 2: to help this show stay alive. My mother in.

9
00:00:19,360 --> 00:00:23,560
Speaker 3: Law demanded a paternity test. I gave her a legal wake.

10
00:00:23,400 --> 00:00:27,280
Speaker 4: Up jokes hun her using.

11
00:00:27,080 --> 00:00:30,760
Speaker 3: A throwaway so I can get an impartial opinion. Since

12
00:00:30,800 --> 00:00:33,960
Speaker 3: the two halves of our families are so completely split

13
00:00:34,040 --> 00:00:37,280
Speaker 3: over this mess, I apologize for the length of this post.

14
00:00:37,680 --> 00:00:41,240
Speaker 3: I'm twenty female and getting married in an official ceremony

15
00:00:41,280 --> 00:00:44,320
Speaker 3: in a few months to my legal husband twenty one

16
00:00:44,400 --> 00:00:49,159
Speaker 3: mil of two years, and his mother has been planning

17
00:00:49,200 --> 00:00:53,159
Speaker 3: the real wedding difficult since the day we got engaged.

18
00:00:53,560 --> 00:00:57,160
Speaker 3: By the way, this comes from mild Nasty and if

19
00:00:57,200 --> 00:00:58,720
Speaker 3: you want to smell your own stories, go to our

20
00:00:58,760 --> 00:01:02,080
Speaker 3: slush Okay story jump sub at full disclosure and kind

21
00:01:02,080 --> 00:01:06,080
Speaker 3: of inplied by the title, My husband and I initially

22
00:01:06,160 --> 00:01:09,680
Speaker 3: became engaged due to an unexpected pregnancy that popped up

23
00:01:09,680 --> 00:01:11,920
Speaker 3: while we were dating, and now we are the proudest

24
00:01:11,959 --> 00:01:14,679
Speaker 3: parents of twins who are now one year's old. I

25
00:01:14,720 --> 00:01:17,679
Speaker 3: honestly don't blame mother in law for her initial negative reactions,

26
00:01:17,720 --> 00:01:21,039
Speaker 3: since we had been seeing each other secretly and husband

27
00:01:21,080 --> 00:01:23,280
Speaker 3: and his family learned about the pregnancy at the same

28
00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:26,360
Speaker 3: time when my sister twenty female kind of lost her

29
00:01:26,400 --> 00:01:29,479
Speaker 3: crap after finding out and went over to their house

30
00:01:29,840 --> 00:01:33,760
Speaker 3: to punt his butt and started a physical alteration that

31
00:01:34,080 --> 00:01:37,640
Speaker 3: ended with husband going to the emergency room for minor injuries.

32
00:01:38,000 --> 00:01:40,640
Speaker 3: It was an entire mess, but after a lot of

33
00:01:40,680 --> 00:01:43,679
Speaker 3: talking and arguments, I won't lie. Husband was excited to

34
00:01:43,760 --> 00:01:46,880
Speaker 3: be having kids despite the timing and circumstances. We got

35
00:01:46,920 --> 00:01:50,920
Speaker 3: engaged immediately since he's fairly religious and wanted to avoid

36
00:01:51,240 --> 00:01:55,040
Speaker 3: the social stigma around having kids out of wedlock, especially

37
00:01:55,080 --> 00:01:57,920
Speaker 3: since it was something that badly affected my family growing

38
00:01:58,000 --> 00:02:01,960
Speaker 3: up due to rumors started about my parents, partly by

39
00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:05,600
Speaker 3: his mother. Mother in law actually fought then with husband

40
00:02:05,640 --> 00:02:09,040
Speaker 3: about the children belonging to him, and after some things

41
00:02:09,040 --> 00:02:12,120
Speaker 3: were said, he moved into my family's home, where we

42
00:02:12,160 --> 00:02:15,399
Speaker 3: stayed until we moved into our own place. Context mother

43
00:02:15,400 --> 00:02:18,360
Speaker 3: in law has doubts because for many years my parents

44
00:02:18,360 --> 00:02:21,280
Speaker 3: were in lavender marriage situation.

45
00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:24,480
Speaker 4: Basically just means that one of one or.

46
00:02:24,480 --> 00:02:28,200
Speaker 3: Both were gay and we're doing IVF while also mutually

47
00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:31,000
Speaker 3: dating a third and my father was separately seeing his

48
00:02:31,080 --> 00:02:33,839
Speaker 3: own partner during this time. My brothers and I don't

49
00:02:33,880 --> 00:02:36,440
Speaker 3: look much like our legal father at the time. If

50
00:02:36,440 --> 00:02:39,440
Speaker 3: I'm going to be honest in all likelihood, and in

51
00:02:39,480 --> 00:02:43,480
Speaker 3: all likelihood, our biological father is my parents' third. However,

52
00:02:43,560 --> 00:02:46,799
Speaker 3: my parents didn't care how we were conceived and raised

53
00:02:46,880 --> 00:02:50,200
Speaker 3: us as my father's children in every way. My mother

54
00:02:50,200 --> 00:02:52,880
Speaker 3: in law and mother were friends for years before falling

55
00:02:52,880 --> 00:02:56,520
Speaker 3: out badly and were in the same social circles. Mother

56
00:02:56,560 --> 00:02:59,480
Speaker 3: in law took personal offense to the unconventional dynamic in

57
00:02:59,520 --> 00:03:03,560
Speaker 3: my family and made a spectacle of my mother every

58
00:03:03,680 --> 00:03:07,720
Speaker 3: time she had a child before remarrying. My husband knew

59
00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:10,720
Speaker 3: for a fact that the babies were his, however, and

60
00:03:10,760 --> 00:03:13,360
Speaker 3: trusts me when I told him as much. We had

61
00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:15,680
Speaker 3: her own kids and plan to get married before they

62
00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:19,160
Speaker 3: turned one. A husband's schoolwork and family issues we both

63
00:03:19,200 --> 00:03:21,280
Speaker 3: had to deal with on top of our raising the

64
00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:24,919
Speaker 3: twins meant we had to rain check our first attempt.

65
00:03:25,320 --> 00:03:28,280
Speaker 3: Now just a few months before our official wedding. Mother

66
00:03:28,280 --> 00:03:33,320
Speaker 3: in law raises the issue again about a paternity test. Ooh,

67
00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:37,360
Speaker 3: my son looks exactly like my husband, especially in his

68
00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:40,320
Speaker 3: old baby photos, aside from his eye color being a

69
00:03:40,400 --> 00:03:43,480
Speaker 3: darker shade and his hair having a curl to it.

70
00:03:43,640 --> 00:03:45,200
Speaker 3: Inherited from me, She's.

71
00:03:45,120 --> 00:03:48,760
Speaker 4: Like, I don't trust that this is your husband's because

72
00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:51,200
Speaker 4: it kind of looks like you, and it should only

73
00:03:51,280 --> 00:03:52,440
Speaker 4: look like your husband.

74
00:03:53,000 --> 00:03:55,480
Speaker 3: My daughter, on the other hand, looks just like mother

75
00:03:55,480 --> 00:03:58,120
Speaker 3: in law. I swear, I'm not kidding. She has my

76
00:03:58,600 --> 00:04:01,800
Speaker 3: hair color, but aside from her eyes, she has husband's

77
00:04:01,840 --> 00:04:04,840
Speaker 3: eye color, and she looks like mother in law in

78
00:04:04,880 --> 00:04:08,880
Speaker 3: a miniature. Despite the physical evidence, She says there is

79
00:04:09,120 --> 00:04:12,680
Speaker 3: obvious doubt due to my mother's history and implied that

80
00:04:12,760 --> 00:04:15,440
Speaker 3: I was unfaithful to my husband in the past because

81
00:04:15,440 --> 00:04:18,000
Speaker 3: of the example I grew up with and the fact

82
00:04:18,120 --> 00:04:21,640
Speaker 3: we didn't start our relationship the right way. Aside from

83
00:04:21,640 --> 00:04:24,320
Speaker 3: not seeing husband for two months when we got into

84
00:04:24,320 --> 00:04:27,000
Speaker 3: a major fight and some cruel things were said about

85
00:04:27,320 --> 00:04:30,320
Speaker 3: by both of us, we have talked and settled this fully.

86
00:04:30,760 --> 00:04:33,839
Speaker 3: I have known him my entire life and spent half

87
00:04:33,880 --> 00:04:36,599
Speaker 3: of it being his best friend and the other half

88
00:04:36,839 --> 00:04:39,760
Speaker 3: in love with him. Even with my parents completely agreed

89
00:04:39,880 --> 00:04:44,640
Speaker 3: upon family dynamics. I saw firsthand the questionable nature of

90
00:04:44,680 --> 00:04:47,960
Speaker 3: the paternity of my brothers and I led to years

91
00:04:48,000 --> 00:04:51,440
Speaker 3: of drama until they divorced and resulted in a lot

92
00:04:51,480 --> 00:04:54,520
Speaker 3: of insecurity that we had to cope with. I loved

93
00:04:54,560 --> 00:04:57,640
Speaker 3: my husband and never wanted him to experience even a

94
00:04:57,839 --> 00:05:00,240
Speaker 3: moment of doubt in his head about the day depth

95
00:05:00,320 --> 00:05:03,359
Speaker 3: of my feelings and loyalty. My mother in law chose

96
00:05:03,400 --> 00:05:05,719
Speaker 3: the day of the announcement of our wedding date to

97
00:05:05,800 --> 00:05:08,359
Speaker 3: approach me in private to push for the DNA test

98
00:05:08,520 --> 00:05:11,560
Speaker 3: and completely brought down my mood in seconds. Since I

99
00:05:11,600 --> 00:05:14,279
Speaker 3: thought we were long past all of this. She spent

100
00:05:14,440 --> 00:05:16,520
Speaker 3: so much time with the twins in the last few

101
00:05:16,560 --> 00:05:19,160
Speaker 3: months before asking for the test, and now I have

102
00:05:19,240 --> 00:05:22,040
Speaker 3: to worry about how she treated them when we weren't there,

103
00:05:22,320 --> 00:05:24,360
Speaker 3: and if she said anything bad in front of them.

104
00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:27,520
Speaker 3: She kept using my daughter's appearance as an example of

105
00:05:27,560 --> 00:05:31,239
Speaker 3: my indiscretions and insisted the only reason my son looks

106
00:05:31,279 --> 00:05:34,120
Speaker 3: like my husband is because my mother shares features with him,

107
00:05:34,640 --> 00:05:37,719
Speaker 3: and that they and that when they get older, their

108
00:05:37,760 --> 00:05:40,880
Speaker 3: true father's features would come out and her son would

109
00:05:40,880 --> 00:05:42,240
Speaker 3: come out to his senses.

110
00:05:42,520 --> 00:05:46,279
Speaker 4: She's like, Oh, they just happened to share features. That's

111
00:05:46,320 --> 00:05:50,800
Speaker 4: why they're not Pokemon. They're not gonna look completely different

112
00:05:50,880 --> 00:05:55,320
Speaker 4: as they evolve. It doesn't make any sense. It looks

113
00:05:55,360 --> 00:05:57,480
Speaker 4: like your husband because it's your husband's child.

114
00:05:57,640 --> 00:06:00,560
Speaker 3: She said she wouldn't let her son be subject to

115
00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:03,880
Speaker 3: what occurred between my parents, and that she would fight

116
00:06:03,960 --> 00:06:07,120
Speaker 3: for him even if he lost sight of reality because

117
00:06:07,640 --> 00:06:10,600
Speaker 3: I was just as loose as my mother and wrapped

118
00:06:10,640 --> 00:06:13,880
Speaker 3: him around my finger. So she even had the gall

119
00:06:14,279 --> 00:06:17,880
Speaker 3: to imply that if both of the twins had been girls,

120
00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:20,440
Speaker 3: husband would it be as inclined to believe he was

121
00:06:20,480 --> 00:06:23,600
Speaker 3: the father and would have called for a separation.

122
00:06:24,200 --> 00:06:26,680
Speaker 4: This girl, this woman is wacky.

123
00:06:27,000 --> 00:06:29,480
Speaker 3: How about you worry about being like the best grandma you.

124
00:06:29,440 --> 00:06:32,159
Speaker 4: Post can be to you? Why would she? Why won't

125
00:06:32,200 --> 00:06:34,480
Speaker 4: she give it up? Give it a rest man.

126
00:06:34,720 --> 00:06:37,240
Speaker 3: It was around that time that I lost it on

127
00:06:37,320 --> 00:06:40,080
Speaker 3: Her husband adores our daughter just as much as our

128
00:06:40,160 --> 00:06:43,240
Speaker 3: son and has talked about wanting more kids in the future.

129
00:06:43,680 --> 00:06:46,040
Speaker 3: She's brought this up in my parents' house as well,

130
00:06:46,120 --> 00:06:49,039
Speaker 3: since they hosted the gathering where we announced their wedding date,

131
00:06:49,360 --> 00:06:52,200
Speaker 3: which made my blood boiled because she didn't have the

132
00:06:52,240 --> 00:06:56,080
Speaker 3: dynecy to wait a while so she wouldn't disrespect me

133
00:06:56,160 --> 00:06:58,400
Speaker 3: in the home I grew up when grew up in

134
00:06:59,080 --> 00:07:02,520
Speaker 3: I called her a min witch who couldn't stand the

135
00:07:02,560 --> 00:07:06,680
Speaker 3: thought of other people being happy in their own relationships,

136
00:07:07,000 --> 00:07:09,720
Speaker 3: and told her if she had that much doubt about

137
00:07:09,760 --> 00:07:16,360
Speaker 3: the twins paternity, then she wouldn't be around them any more. Okay, exactly, okay.

138
00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:19,120
Speaker 3: I like her telling, yeah, man, you might as well.

139
00:07:19,320 --> 00:07:22,680
Speaker 3: There would be no DNA test, and if one was

140
00:07:22,760 --> 00:07:26,160
Speaker 3: conducted without my permission, then I would pursue legal action

141
00:07:26,560 --> 00:07:28,040
Speaker 3: and drag her name through the mud.

142
00:07:28,120 --> 00:07:29,720
Speaker 4: In returns drag.

143
00:07:29,520 --> 00:07:30,880
Speaker 3: Her name, that's how we do it.

144
00:07:31,040 --> 00:07:32,640
Speaker 4: Get the law on your side. Man.

145
00:07:32,880 --> 00:07:35,480
Speaker 3: She wouldn't be going to the wedding either, since she

146
00:07:35,720 --> 00:07:37,560
Speaker 3: was so determined for it not to happen.

147
00:07:38,080 --> 00:07:38,320
Speaker 4: Here.

148
00:07:38,440 --> 00:07:40,640
Speaker 3: I know I was in the wrong because I didn't

149
00:07:40,680 --> 00:07:44,360
Speaker 3: talk to husband before disinviting her. More personal things were said.

150
00:07:44,400 --> 00:07:47,720
Speaker 3: The entire fight got loud for some people, all family

151
00:07:47,760 --> 00:07:53,320
Speaker 3: thankfully to overhear me, all but punting her out. Thankfully,

152
00:07:53,360 --> 00:07:56,320
Speaker 3: she left without too much of a fuss, likely because

153
00:07:56,320 --> 00:07:59,560
Speaker 3: of the scene it would have made. But afterwards husband's

154
00:07:59,560 --> 00:08:03,360
Speaker 3: brother twenty five mil chimed in that I reacted too

155
00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:07,080
Speaker 3: harshly and should just do the test to reassure their

156
00:08:07,160 --> 00:08:10,680
Speaker 3: mother and move on. Their grandfather also agreed, saying it

157
00:08:10,680 --> 00:08:13,360
Speaker 3: would settle the matter once and for all, and putting

158
00:08:13,360 --> 00:08:17,360
Speaker 3: it off so far has brought on the exact suspicion

159
00:08:17,440 --> 00:08:19,640
Speaker 3: that I wanted to avoid it in the first place.

160
00:08:19,680 --> 00:08:21,600
Speaker 4: I say, I think you get that DNA test, and

161
00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:24,280
Speaker 4: then you go, no, conduct, that's what it costs. Yeah,

162
00:08:24,280 --> 00:08:26,480
Speaker 4: you go, okay, fine, you can have your DNA test,

163
00:08:26,520 --> 00:08:28,360
Speaker 4: but then after I want to see you guys. Ever again.

164
00:08:28,880 --> 00:08:33,160
Speaker 3: My stepfather threw husband's grandfather out afterwards, as he worn

165
00:08:33,280 --> 00:08:37,200
Speaker 3: out his welcome by then, and ended the celebration. My

166
00:08:37,280 --> 00:08:40,360
Speaker 3: family reassured me in the aftermath that I was well

167
00:08:40,400 --> 00:08:42,640
Speaker 3: within my right to be angry that she brought up

168
00:08:42,679 --> 00:08:45,360
Speaker 3: the DNA test, But I noticed that husband stayed to

169
00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:48,160
Speaker 3: the side with the twins and didn't respond even when

170
00:08:48,200 --> 00:08:52,000
Speaker 3: we went home not too long afterwards. I think he

171
00:08:52,120 --> 00:08:54,400
Speaker 3: might be upset with me for how I treated his

172
00:08:54,480 --> 00:08:57,520
Speaker 3: mother and is waiting for a good time to bring

173
00:08:57,520 --> 00:09:00,280
Speaker 3: it up. Since it's likely a fight might start, and

174
00:09:00,320 --> 00:09:02,959
Speaker 3: we always try to make sure the twins aren't around

175
00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:09,000
Speaker 3: when they happen, we're dropping them off at their maternal grandparents' house. Later. Well,

176
00:09:09,000 --> 00:09:13,040
Speaker 3: I'll be hearing his feelings on this then, By the way,

177
00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:15,720
Speaker 3: you can hear us talk about feelings in other people's

178
00:09:15,720 --> 00:09:19,320
Speaker 3: situations on your favorite freaking podcast platform. What do they

179
00:09:19,320 --> 00:09:19,920
Speaker 3: gotta go to?

180
00:09:20,400 --> 00:09:24,560
Speaker 4: I Radio, Spotify have a podcast and so.

181
00:09:24,600 --> 00:09:27,160
Speaker 3: Feel What eleven letters do people have to type in

182
00:09:27,240 --> 00:09:28,720
Speaker 3: order to get to their favorite podcast?

183
00:09:28,880 --> 00:09:30,520
Speaker 4: Okay, story time.

184
00:09:31,120 --> 00:09:34,040
Speaker 3: And boom there will be a plethora of stories just

185
00:09:34,040 --> 00:09:35,920
Speaker 3: as this one for you to listen to.

186
00:09:36,559 --> 00:09:37,760
Speaker 4: Yes, it's true.

187
00:09:38,000 --> 00:09:39,360
Speaker 3: Yeah, no contact.

188
00:09:39,679 --> 00:09:41,760
Speaker 4: Honestly, if they keep pushing the issue, I think you

189
00:09:41,760 --> 00:09:44,760
Speaker 4: tell them. I think you could say, like, hey, you

190
00:09:44,800 --> 00:09:46,760
Speaker 4: can I have your DNA test, but it will cost

191
00:09:47,120 --> 00:09:47,960
Speaker 4: this relationship.

192
00:09:48,160 --> 00:09:49,760
Speaker 3: Is that worth that to you? I don't think there's

193
00:09:49,840 --> 00:09:50,600
Speaker 3: a sport.

194
00:09:50,360 --> 00:09:53,559
Speaker 4: You just got in contact. Yeah, I think that'd be

195
00:09:53,559 --> 00:09:56,480
Speaker 4: a pretty good I think that'd be a pretty good guess.

196
00:09:56,760 --> 00:09:59,880
Speaker 3: I'm worried that even if I was right for being upset, Yes,

197
00:10:00,360 --> 00:10:03,200
Speaker 3: I went too far by getting so heated and raising

198
00:10:03,240 --> 00:10:07,079
Speaker 3: my voice, as well as for throwing out personal bars

199
00:10:07,080 --> 00:10:10,160
Speaker 3: when I should have tried to stay calm and refuse

200
00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:13,000
Speaker 3: her like an adult. I really regret calling her what

201
00:10:13,120 --> 00:10:15,680
Speaker 3: I did and plan on apologizing for that no matter

202
00:10:15,720 --> 00:10:17,880
Speaker 3: what judgment I get here. So am I the a hole?

203
00:10:18,040 --> 00:10:20,480
Speaker 3: We have one comment? Come at one, not the a hole.

204
00:10:20,559 --> 00:10:22,840
Speaker 3: Tell mother in law you'll get the paternity test with

205
00:10:22,880 --> 00:10:26,199
Speaker 3: the understanding that when it comes back that he's the father,

206
00:10:26,640 --> 00:10:30,320
Speaker 3: she will never contact you again. No visits to the house,

207
00:10:30,679 --> 00:10:35,200
Speaker 3: no texts, nothing. On a side note, wtf does your

208
00:10:35,240 --> 00:10:38,280
Speaker 3: mom's spicy life have to do with you? Opie says

209
00:10:38,320 --> 00:10:42,040
Speaker 3: she is thoroughly convinced that I'll somehow forced my husband

210
00:10:42,040 --> 00:10:44,760
Speaker 3: into an open marriage of some kind due to what

211
00:10:44,800 --> 00:10:48,080
Speaker 3: my mother did, despite my mother and I situation being

212
00:10:48,120 --> 00:10:51,440
Speaker 3: completely different. Guys, that's the end of that story.

213
00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:55,720
Speaker 4: My sister in law tried to take my house, so

214
00:10:55,840 --> 00:11:01,240
Speaker 4: I revealed the truth. I cast spell Reveal Truth. Wooh,

215
00:11:01,880 --> 00:11:05,600
Speaker 4: throwaway for obvious reasons. This happened two nights ago, and

216
00:11:05,640 --> 00:11:08,679
Speaker 4: I'm still feeling some type of way about it. Background.

217
00:11:08,800 --> 00:11:12,040
Speaker 4: My thirty female husband thirty two male has a younger

218
00:11:12,120 --> 00:11:15,040
Speaker 4: sister sister in law twenty five female sister in law

219
00:11:15,080 --> 00:11:18,320
Speaker 4: is currently going through divorce with four children. My husband

220
00:11:18,360 --> 00:11:20,880
Speaker 4: and I also have four children. My husband and I

221
00:11:20,960 --> 00:11:23,320
Speaker 4: live on a very quiet country back road in our

222
00:11:23,360 --> 00:11:26,359
Speaker 4: little town, us and his family being the only residences

223
00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:30,040
Speaker 4: on the road. So both his sister and their families

224
00:11:30,160 --> 00:11:33,800
Speaker 4: and his parents live within walking distance upper house. By

225
00:11:33,840 --> 00:11:36,679
Speaker 4: the way, this comes from throw that asterisk on the

226
00:11:36,840 --> 00:11:39,760
Speaker 4: r slashowkay storytime separate it. So. My husband and I

227
00:11:39,760 --> 00:11:42,960
Speaker 4: have been married for seven years and have four young children.

228
00:11:43,200 --> 00:11:45,000
Speaker 4: My husband bought the land we live on from his

229
00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:48,120
Speaker 4: parents when he was eighteen wow. And when we got married,

230
00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:50,360
Speaker 4: we built a house on it. We designed our house

231
00:11:50,440 --> 00:11:52,760
Speaker 4: with a big family and mind and designed it to

232
00:11:52,800 --> 00:11:55,959
Speaker 4: be our forever home. It has never been a thought

233
00:11:56,040 --> 00:11:59,280
Speaker 4: to move or look elsewhere. My sister in law is

234
00:11:59,280 --> 00:12:02,320
Speaker 4: going through a She is struggling, to say the least.

235
00:12:02,760 --> 00:12:05,120
Speaker 4: She was in a very toxic relationship with the rex,

236
00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:07,960
Speaker 4: with her contributing just as much as he was, and

237
00:12:08,080 --> 00:12:10,719
Speaker 4: he filed for divorce and moved out, leaving the four

238
00:12:10,800 --> 00:12:13,880
Speaker 4: kids with her. My mother in law called my husband

239
00:12:13,920 --> 00:12:16,400
Speaker 4: two nights ago and asked if we could come over

240
00:12:16,440 --> 00:12:18,920
Speaker 4: for a chat. We get there and my in laws

241
00:12:18,960 --> 00:12:21,040
Speaker 4: and sister in law are sitting on the couch like

242
00:12:21,080 --> 00:12:24,000
Speaker 4: they were staging some kind of intervention. It was just

243
00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:27,760
Speaker 4: really strange. My mother in law didn't beat around the

244
00:12:27,800 --> 00:12:30,480
Speaker 4: bush at all. She explained how sister in law's ex

245
00:12:30,600 --> 00:12:33,160
Speaker 4: was getting the house in the divorce and they would

246
00:12:33,200 --> 00:12:35,600
Speaker 4: be homeless within the month if we didn't give her

247
00:12:35,640 --> 00:12:38,200
Speaker 4: our home. It honestly took me a second to comprehend,

248
00:12:38,200 --> 00:12:40,319
Speaker 4: which she even said because it was so out of

249
00:12:40,400 --> 00:12:43,240
Speaker 4: left field. Husband didn't need that second and look at

250
00:12:43,280 --> 00:12:47,240
Speaker 4: them straight in the eyes and said no. In law

251
00:12:47,280 --> 00:12:49,360
Speaker 4: started telling us things like, you guys don't need all

252
00:12:49,400 --> 00:12:51,199
Speaker 4: that house. You guys can move into one of the

253
00:12:51,240 --> 00:12:53,720
Speaker 4: new neighborhoods in town. You guys could just build a

254
00:12:53,720 --> 00:12:56,560
Speaker 4: new house. I offered to open up our playroom and

255
00:12:56,600 --> 00:13:01,160
Speaker 4: guest bedroom to them. Yeah, that's a sensible solution until

256
00:13:01,200 --> 00:13:03,559
Speaker 4: they could find somewhere to live. We have air mattresses

257
00:13:03,600 --> 00:13:05,640
Speaker 4: and the guest room as a full bath. But that

258
00:13:05,720 --> 00:13:09,000
Speaker 4: wasn't good enough. Apparently that's when we got up and left.

259
00:13:09,480 --> 00:13:12,160
Speaker 4: They began yelling after us, saying we don't care about

260
00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:16,959
Speaker 4: the children. Family helps family, We're being greedy and selfish.

261
00:13:17,280 --> 00:13:20,480
Speaker 4: I'm honestly so proud of how we reacted, because my

262
00:13:20,600 --> 00:13:23,480
Speaker 4: first instinct was to go off and say some hurtful things,

263
00:13:23,600 --> 00:13:28,120
Speaker 4: but we went home to our home. We love sister

264
00:13:28,160 --> 00:13:30,360
Speaker 4: in law's kids and obviously do not want them to

265
00:13:30,400 --> 00:13:32,839
Speaker 4: be homeless, but they don't need my house at the

266
00:13:32,880 --> 00:13:35,640
Speaker 4: expense of my own children and family. I don't know

267
00:13:35,679 --> 00:13:38,560
Speaker 4: why sister in law's family deserves my home. What about

268
00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:41,800
Speaker 4: my kids? Now the in laws are calling and texting

269
00:13:41,840 --> 00:13:44,840
Speaker 4: saying we don't care about the kids. We're selfish and greedy.

270
00:13:44,880 --> 00:13:47,600
Speaker 4: We're making her homeless. And I'm wondering if maybe we

271
00:13:47,600 --> 00:13:51,040
Speaker 4: were too quick to say no. So am I the

272
00:13:51,040 --> 00:13:53,839
Speaker 4: ale for not giving my home to my sister in law? No,

273
00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:58,480
Speaker 4: don't give your home to someone that's crazy.

274
00:13:59,240 --> 00:14:02,000
Speaker 1: It would be very different if they were like just

275
00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:05,920
Speaker 1: for like a temporary stay, however long they need to

276
00:14:05,960 --> 00:14:06,959
Speaker 1: get back on their feet.

277
00:14:07,200 --> 00:14:09,400
Speaker 4: Yeah, don't give up your home. Also, touch to your

278
00:14:09,440 --> 00:14:12,080
Speaker 4: sister in law directly and say hey, we'd be happy

279
00:14:12,120 --> 00:14:14,040
Speaker 4: to host you guys. Have you here until you can

280
00:14:14,040 --> 00:14:16,320
Speaker 4: get back on your you know, find someplace. I'm not

281
00:14:16,360 --> 00:14:17,760
Speaker 4: going to just give you my house.

282
00:14:17,840 --> 00:14:19,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, you don't get you just to have my house.

283
00:14:19,720 --> 00:14:22,240
Speaker 1: You can just move into one of the new neighborhoods.

284
00:14:22,560 --> 00:14:24,920
Speaker 1: Is one of the most insane things I've ever heard.

285
00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:28,800
Speaker 4: Insane relevant comments. Cruel summer not the ale. You can't

286
00:14:28,840 --> 00:14:31,280
Speaker 4: be making someone homeless when you have literally offered them

287
00:14:31,320 --> 00:14:33,800
Speaker 4: space in your own home. Yeah, sister in law is

288
00:14:33,800 --> 00:14:36,760
Speaker 4: making herself homeless by turning down offers of assistance because

289
00:14:36,760 --> 00:14:39,640
Speaker 4: they aren't exactly what she's going for. She's really the

290
00:14:39,680 --> 00:14:42,440
Speaker 4: selfish and greedy one because she insists on displacing your

291
00:14:42,440 --> 00:14:45,640
Speaker 4: family rather than humble herself to live temporarily in someone

292
00:14:45,640 --> 00:14:49,400
Speaker 4: else's home. Sometimes it sucks to suck, and for sister

293
00:14:49,480 --> 00:14:51,440
Speaker 4: in law, this may be one of those times. But

294
00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:53,720
Speaker 4: word to the wise, take your offer off the table.

295
00:14:53,840 --> 00:14:55,760
Speaker 4: You've already seen that they are willing to resort to

296
00:14:55,800 --> 00:14:58,680
Speaker 4: anything to get you to bend and cave. They aren't

297
00:14:58,760 --> 00:15:01,840
Speaker 4: interested in respecting you, treating you with dignity. When sister

298
00:15:01,880 --> 00:15:04,640
Speaker 4: in law gets desperate, she may finally agree to your offer,

299
00:15:05,000 --> 00:15:08,640
Speaker 4: but that doesn't mean the bullying will stop. Likely it'll

300
00:15:08,680 --> 00:15:10,720
Speaker 4: get worse, and she'll try to make your life miserable

301
00:15:10,760 --> 00:15:13,560
Speaker 4: from within your own home until you're forced to consider

302
00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:17,040
Speaker 4: consider punting her out, And then the guilt trips will

303
00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:19,760
Speaker 4: get a thousand times worse as you are now literally

304
00:15:19,760 --> 00:15:23,080
Speaker 4: punning her out onto the street instead call ther bluff

305
00:15:23,600 --> 00:15:26,160
Speaker 4: and say, we are very disappointed with how little respect

306
00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:29,280
Speaker 4: this family has for our family, our children, and our

307
00:15:29,320 --> 00:15:31,880
Speaker 4: own home. In light of this, the previous offer to

308
00:15:31,920 --> 00:15:33,880
Speaker 4: open up the playroom to sister in law is no

309
00:15:33,920 --> 00:15:35,880
Speaker 4: longer on the table, as we feel it would be

310
00:15:35,920 --> 00:15:38,720
Speaker 4: a mistake to try and share space with someone who

311
00:15:38,760 --> 00:15:41,200
Speaker 4: clearly has no respect for us. We rest easy in

312
00:15:41,280 --> 00:15:42,840
Speaker 4: knowing that all of the rest of you, who are

313
00:15:42,880 --> 00:15:45,920
Speaker 4: clearly not as greedy or selfish as us, are likely

314
00:15:45,960 --> 00:15:48,280
Speaker 4: waiting with open arms to accept sister in law and

315
00:15:48,360 --> 00:15:51,040
Speaker 4: her kids into your homes so she will have somewhere

316
00:15:51,040 --> 00:15:53,840
Speaker 4: to go without her offer. Ooh, that's a nice response,

317
00:15:54,120 --> 00:15:57,040
Speaker 4: Opie responds, My husband has already told sister in law

318
00:15:57,080 --> 00:16:00,320
Speaker 4: that she isn't welcome anymore. But honestly, if it came

319
00:16:00,360 --> 00:16:02,720
Speaker 4: down to it, I would take the kids in a heartbeat.

320
00:16:03,680 --> 00:16:06,440
Speaker 4: They didn't ask for this and they're struggling so much.

321
00:16:07,120 --> 00:16:09,640
Speaker 4: But sister in law can sleep in the shed and

322
00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:12,400
Speaker 4: sushi MENO. Box says, how is the ex getting the

323
00:16:12,400 --> 00:16:14,440
Speaker 4: house if she's the one with the kids, assuming that

324
00:16:14,440 --> 00:16:17,760
Speaker 4: they're his kids, that is, Opie says, the house is his,

325
00:16:18,120 --> 00:16:21,359
Speaker 4: bought and paid for by the hymn without her contributing

326
00:16:21,400 --> 00:16:25,680
Speaker 4: a cent, so that definitely factors in. But from my understanding,

327
00:16:25,760 --> 00:16:28,000
Speaker 4: she can't buy him out because she has no money,

328
00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:30,600
Speaker 4: and the in laws can't or won't buy him out either.

329
00:16:31,440 --> 00:16:34,080
Speaker 4: And I'm also understanding that he is paying quite a

330
00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:36,960
Speaker 4: pretty penny in child support, so I don't think she

331
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:39,840
Speaker 4: would get the house paid for by him and child support.

332
00:16:40,680 --> 00:16:42,160
Speaker 4: She may have had to pick one or the other,

333
00:16:42,720 --> 00:16:45,600
Speaker 4: and I can say with certainty she would choose child

334
00:16:45,680 --> 00:16:46,400
Speaker 4: support money.

335
00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:47,640
Speaker 3: Go figure.

336
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:50,400
Speaker 4: Yeah, dog mother one two three says, your in laws

337
00:16:50,440 --> 00:16:53,920
Speaker 4: are old, their family is grown up now, they don't

338
00:16:53,960 --> 00:16:56,400
Speaker 4: need their house. They should stop being so selfish and

339
00:16:56,480 --> 00:16:58,800
Speaker 4: move out somewhere smaller so their daughter can out their house.

340
00:16:59,240 --> 00:17:01,520
Speaker 4: Why are they making they're homeless? Why don't they care

341
00:17:01,560 --> 00:17:04,720
Speaker 4: about their grandkids? How is any of that reasonable? Not

342
00:17:04,760 --> 00:17:05,120
Speaker 4: the able?

343
00:17:05,240 --> 00:17:08,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, exactly them being like, you're breaking the kids homeless.

344
00:17:08,480 --> 00:17:11,359
Speaker 1: It's like, how about you? No, you you are also

345
00:17:11,480 --> 00:17:11,840
Speaker 1: doing that.

346
00:17:12,040 --> 00:17:13,960
Speaker 4: I knew you. My husband has been dealing with his

347
00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:17,600
Speaker 4: parents and sister. I've been ignoring all the text and calls.

348
00:17:17,680 --> 00:17:20,679
Speaker 4: But but from what they're saying, their house is too small,

349
00:17:21,119 --> 00:17:23,920
Speaker 4: only two bedrooms, and they need something bigger for the

350
00:17:24,000 --> 00:17:26,520
Speaker 4: kids to be able to thrive. So obviously that means

351
00:17:26,560 --> 00:17:28,159
Speaker 4: my own kids have to be moved out of the

352
00:17:28,160 --> 00:17:30,399
Speaker 4: home they've all lived in for their whole lives and

353
00:17:30,520 --> 00:17:32,800
Speaker 4: just go somewhere else. Well, my husband and I still

354
00:17:32,840 --> 00:17:34,760
Speaker 4: pay for them to live in our house because sister

355
00:17:34,800 --> 00:17:36,919
Speaker 4: in law doesn't work and has no plans to.

356
00:17:37,359 --> 00:17:38,680
Speaker 2: And there is an update.

357
00:17:38,920 --> 00:17:42,639
Speaker 4: But man, oh man, how entitled these people who don't

358
00:17:43,160 --> 00:17:47,359
Speaker 4: have the funds to be this entitled? Yeah, like you guys,

359
00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:50,760
Speaker 4: don't you You cannot be this entitled when you literally

360
00:17:51,520 --> 00:17:52,320
Speaker 4: have nowhere else to go.

361
00:17:52,720 --> 00:17:56,160
Speaker 1: Well, it sounds like because the their setup was from

362
00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:58,919
Speaker 1: an inheritance situation right where it's like the land at

363
00:17:59,000 --> 00:17:59,920
Speaker 1: least was inherited.

364
00:18:00,359 --> 00:18:02,320
Speaker 2: No, it was the grandfather.

365
00:18:02,840 --> 00:18:05,520
Speaker 4: Well from what I understood, I think maybe the parents

366
00:18:05,560 --> 00:18:10,359
Speaker 4: had narrated and Opie's husband bought it when he was eighteen.

367
00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:13,159
Speaker 1: Yeah, he bought it from them, bought it when he

368
00:18:13,200 --> 00:18:16,680
Speaker 1: was eighteen, That's what I said. I feel like they're

369
00:18:16,720 --> 00:18:20,320
Speaker 1: either there's a wealth disparity going on here that's driving

370
00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:23,199
Speaker 1: this entitlement where they're just like, well, you already have

371
00:18:23,400 --> 00:18:23,960
Speaker 1: all the money.

372
00:18:23,960 --> 00:18:26,280
Speaker 2: It's like, just make more money and buy another house.

373
00:18:26,600 --> 00:18:28,760
Speaker 4: But there is an update. So as a lot of

374
00:18:28,800 --> 00:18:32,000
Speaker 4: you and myself thought sister in law was lying about

375
00:18:32,080 --> 00:18:34,880
Speaker 4: a thought. Not going to go into too much detail

376
00:18:34,960 --> 00:18:38,199
Speaker 4: because it's seriously years worth of lies. But my husband

377
00:18:38,200 --> 00:18:40,440
Speaker 4: and I call the ex brother in law and we

378
00:18:40,480 --> 00:18:45,159
Speaker 4: one hundred percent fully believe everything her ex told us.

379
00:18:45,480 --> 00:18:47,360
Speaker 4: He has no reason to lie to us and said

380
00:18:47,400 --> 00:18:49,280
Speaker 4: over and over he just wants the best for his

381
00:18:49,400 --> 00:18:51,919
Speaker 4: kids and he's trying his best not to do anything

382
00:18:51,960 --> 00:18:54,199
Speaker 4: that could possibly harm in a court of law. She

383
00:18:54,320 --> 00:18:56,640
Speaker 4: lied about him getting the house, lied about how much

384
00:18:56,640 --> 00:18:59,040
Speaker 4: she was going to get in child support, lied about

385
00:18:59,040 --> 00:19:01,679
Speaker 4: how often she would have a children. Something else that

386
00:19:01,720 --> 00:19:04,119
Speaker 4: came out is that her oldest child is not even

387
00:19:04,160 --> 00:19:05,080
Speaker 4: her ex's child.

388
00:19:05,280 --> 00:19:09,320
Speaker 2: Oh my god, this lady, why are her pants on fire?

389
00:19:09,400 --> 00:19:11,080
Speaker 2: Could she do? She a liar?

390
00:19:11,880 --> 00:19:14,879
Speaker 4: Just so many lies. We feel so incredibly stupid and

391
00:19:14,960 --> 00:19:18,080
Speaker 4: deceived and disgusted. To be honest, we told my in

392
00:19:18,160 --> 00:19:20,520
Speaker 4: laws everything he had said, and they were upset to

393
00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:22,520
Speaker 4: find out she has been lying, but they kind of

394
00:19:22,520 --> 00:19:25,160
Speaker 4: doubled down, saying she must have a good reason. She's

395
00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:27,560
Speaker 4: backed into a corner. She's really going through a tough time.

396
00:19:27,720 --> 00:19:29,480
Speaker 2: Golden child had a.

397
00:19:29,400 --> 00:19:32,080
Speaker 4: Bunch of other nonsense. Sister in law was called and

398
00:19:32,119 --> 00:19:34,200
Speaker 4: asked to come and join us. She of course took

399
00:19:34,440 --> 00:19:38,480
Speaker 4: zero accountability for the lying and sneaking, and was screaming

400
00:19:38,520 --> 00:19:41,000
Speaker 4: at us about how gross we were for going behind

401
00:19:41,000 --> 00:19:43,760
Speaker 4: her back to her ex how she'll never trust us

402
00:19:43,760 --> 00:19:47,640
Speaker 4: again because we betrayed her. Oh no, boohoo. She also

403
00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:49,480
Speaker 4: let us know that she was asking for our house

404
00:19:49,840 --> 00:19:52,000
Speaker 4: because she truly feels like we had actually built it

405
00:19:52,040 --> 00:19:55,679
Speaker 4: for her. That's so funny, because I didn't. They didn't.

406
00:19:56,680 --> 00:19:59,120
Speaker 4: Our kids' rooms were how she would have designed them herself.

407
00:19:59,359 --> 00:20:01,800
Speaker 4: She would have loved to cook in my kitchen, she

408
00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:04,439
Speaker 4: loves my bathroom layout. Basically everything about my house is

409
00:20:04,440 --> 00:20:06,600
Speaker 4: how she would have built it herself. And she thinks

410
00:20:06,640 --> 00:20:08,680
Speaker 4: that I must have somehow known she would have needed

411
00:20:08,680 --> 00:20:09,639
Speaker 4: a home in the future.

412
00:20:09,720 --> 00:20:13,480
Speaker 1: All right, mental help she needs. I don't know, she heads,

413
00:20:13,520 --> 00:20:15,439
Speaker 1: I don't know she needs therapy. But like that is

414
00:20:15,440 --> 00:20:18,359
Speaker 1: one of the most insane things billionaire's mansion.

415
00:20:18,680 --> 00:20:21,399
Speaker 4: Wow, you really, you really knew I would want all

416
00:20:21,400 --> 00:20:23,639
Speaker 4: of this? Oh my god, you did all this for me.

417
00:20:24,400 --> 00:20:27,480
Speaker 4: This is exactly what I should have I would have

418
00:20:27,520 --> 00:20:28,320
Speaker 4: done the same thing.

419
00:20:31,119 --> 00:20:33,280
Speaker 2: No, we know this is our this is our this

420
00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:34,600
Speaker 2: is our house.

421
00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:37,439
Speaker 4: Bye. At that point I was just done and so

422
00:20:37,680 --> 00:20:41,320
Speaker 4: was my husband. Can't argue with batcrap crazy. We left

423
00:20:41,480 --> 00:20:44,040
Speaker 4: a whole lot of screaming about no longer being family

424
00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:45,720
Speaker 4: and did not expect to see them again.

425
00:20:45,800 --> 00:20:47,439
Speaker 2: Thank God, we don't want to.

426
00:20:47,800 --> 00:20:50,040
Speaker 4: Honestly, I think never seeing them again is the only

427
00:20:50,040 --> 00:20:52,520
Speaker 4: way to go from here. It's been a crazy few

428
00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:54,760
Speaker 4: days since then. We hired a friend of my husband

429
00:20:54,760 --> 00:20:57,320
Speaker 4: to put up a privacy fence around our entire property

430
00:20:57,840 --> 00:21:00,840
Speaker 4: and added extra cameras to our security system. We have

431
00:21:00,880 --> 00:21:03,640
Speaker 4: a good family friend, friend of our family not husbands

432
00:21:04,160 --> 00:21:06,240
Speaker 4: on the police force, and let him know the situation

433
00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:08,280
Speaker 4: so he knows if he gets a phone call from

434
00:21:08,359 --> 00:21:11,280
Speaker 4: us that it's serious. I think sister in law thought

435
00:21:11,280 --> 00:21:13,040
Speaker 4: that she could out my house because she loved it.

436
00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:16,160
Speaker 4: That's kind of it. She wanted it, so she thought

437
00:21:16,160 --> 00:21:18,480
Speaker 4: she deserved it. I guess she was either planning to

438
00:21:18,560 --> 00:21:20,800
Speaker 4: sell her house at some point or maybe rented out.

439
00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:23,399
Speaker 4: I have no idea, and I really don't think she

440
00:21:23,480 --> 00:21:26,000
Speaker 4: had thought that all the way through. She just thought

441
00:21:26,040 --> 00:21:27,880
Speaker 4: if she told us all she was losing the house,

442
00:21:27,920 --> 00:21:29,880
Speaker 4: then we would feel obligated to help in the way

443
00:21:29,960 --> 00:21:33,560
Speaker 4: she wanted. By the way, we want you to listen

444
00:21:33,600 --> 00:21:36,080
Speaker 4: to full episodes of stories just like this. Just go

445
00:21:36,200 --> 00:21:39,720
Speaker 4: to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or iHeartRadio and search a booky storytime.

446
00:21:39,960 --> 00:21:42,280
Speaker 2: It is what we want, what we want, but.

447
00:21:42,280 --> 00:21:44,160
Speaker 4: There's a little bit left to the story. I think

448
00:21:44,200 --> 00:21:46,400
Speaker 4: we all know you're not the egg hole, though.

449
00:21:46,760 --> 00:21:47,560
Speaker 2: Well I would be.

450
00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:51,639
Speaker 1: This level of derangement is like, I'm concerned that you

451
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:57,320
Speaker 1: for one second seriously thought that, uh, we were just

452
00:21:57,359 --> 00:21:59,320
Speaker 1: gonna give you the house because you like it.

453
00:21:59,680 --> 00:22:03,880
Speaker 4: Yep, just ignore her. No contact, low contact, one of those.

454
00:22:04,840 --> 00:22:07,720
Speaker 4: But let's finish this off. So I hope this clears

455
00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:09,840
Speaker 4: up some questions. I know I feel at peace with

456
00:22:09,880 --> 00:22:13,000
Speaker 4: the situation. My husband has been grieving a bit. He's

457
00:22:13,040 --> 00:22:15,399
Speaker 4: sad that his parents have chosen a liar over a

458
00:22:15,400 --> 00:22:18,840
Speaker 4: man who has done everything for his family, never hesitated

459
00:22:18,880 --> 00:22:21,800
Speaker 4: to help, and only ever been a doting son. But

460
00:22:21,960 --> 00:22:24,000
Speaker 4: I think this is for the best. They don't treat

461
00:22:24,040 --> 00:22:25,919
Speaker 4: him the way he deserves, and I'm glad to be

462
00:22:26,000 --> 00:22:28,679
Speaker 4: rid of him. I'm sad for my kids and the

463
00:22:28,720 --> 00:22:31,400
Speaker 4: situation this puts them in, but my family has enough

464
00:22:31,480 --> 00:22:33,960
Speaker 4: love for everyone Thank you to everyone who took the

465
00:22:33,960 --> 00:22:36,680
Speaker 4: time to comment and message and give advice and ask questions.

466
00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:39,439
Speaker 4: Hopefully you guys won't hear from me again, and that

467
00:22:39,560 --> 00:22:41,840
Speaker 4: is the end of that story. It looks like we

468
00:22:41,880 --> 00:22:44,199
Speaker 4: didn't hear and we didn't hear from you again, So

469
00:22:45,080 --> 00:22:47,160
Speaker 4: I'm gonna assume that it all worked out.

470
00:22:47,520 --> 00:22:50,879
Speaker 2: It did. I'm gonna mentally say that it all worked out.

471
00:22:50,800 --> 00:22:52,760
Speaker 4: All worked out, and you got your beautiful house with

472
00:22:52,800 --> 00:22:56,520
Speaker 4: all of your kids. Yeah, my mother in law lied

473
00:22:56,600 --> 00:22:58,840
Speaker 4: about my wedding. Now I'm the bad guy.

474
00:22:59,320 --> 00:23:02,679
Speaker 1: Ooh ooh, she turned it into Billie Eilish Shell.

475
00:23:04,160 --> 00:23:06,760
Speaker 4: I am a longtime reader, first time posting. It has

476
00:23:06,800 --> 00:23:09,320
Speaker 4: been a few years since our wedding. However, I told

477
00:23:09,359 --> 00:23:12,120
Speaker 4: the friend our wedding story recently and realized how actually

478
00:23:12,200 --> 00:23:15,480
Speaker 4: crazy it was, so I thought I would share. First

479
00:23:15,520 --> 00:23:17,439
Speaker 4: of all, we did not have a traditional wedding and

480
00:23:17,520 --> 00:23:19,720
Speaker 4: never would. My future husband and I had our fill

481
00:23:19,760 --> 00:23:22,480
Speaker 4: of weddings that take lots of effort and money. We

482
00:23:22,560 --> 00:23:25,600
Speaker 4: literally wanted our families to turn up, celebrate with us,

483
00:23:25,760 --> 00:23:28,440
Speaker 4: have a nice time, and then leave happy. By the way,

484
00:23:28,480 --> 00:23:30,960
Speaker 4: this comes from indubitably doubtful and if you want to

485
00:23:30,960 --> 00:23:33,120
Speaker 4: submit your own stories go to our slash Okay storytime.

486
00:23:33,119 --> 00:23:35,480
Speaker 4: Separate it. So the plan was that we would have

487
00:23:35,560 --> 00:23:38,200
Speaker 4: a celebrant to marry us in a family friend's cocktail bar,

488
00:23:38,600 --> 00:23:41,600
Speaker 4: have drinks, cocktails and some food, and then people could

489
00:23:41,600 --> 00:23:43,240
Speaker 4: come back to an apartment we had rented for the

490
00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:47,560
Speaker 4: after party fun immediate family only and done our idea

491
00:23:47,720 --> 00:23:50,959
Speaker 4: of perfect We also did not have much money and

492
00:23:51,000 --> 00:23:54,439
Speaker 4: I have a very large extended family Andrew plus, so

493
00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:58,560
Speaker 4: we were very strict immediate family only. I would invite

494
00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:02,600
Speaker 4: my immediate family, and future husband would invite his immediate

495
00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:04,879
Speaker 4: family and his aunt and cousins from one side of

496
00:24:04,880 --> 00:24:07,119
Speaker 4: the family because he does not speak to the other side.

497
00:24:07,640 --> 00:24:08,280
Speaker 2: No friends.

498
00:24:08,480 --> 00:24:10,720
Speaker 4: You invite one friend, then you have to invite them all.

499
00:24:10,880 --> 00:24:14,040
Speaker 4: Simple and small. My family was fine with us. Future's

500
00:24:14,080 --> 00:24:18,280
Speaker 4: future husband's family was not drama number one.

501
00:24:18,520 --> 00:24:19,080
Speaker 2: The date.

502
00:24:19,920 --> 00:24:22,160
Speaker 4: We had limited time to get married due to paperwork

503
00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:25,680
Speaker 4: deadlines and my sister was going overseas for a long period.

504
00:24:25,800 --> 00:24:27,560
Speaker 4: We had about one to two months of prep time

505
00:24:27,640 --> 00:24:30,520
Speaker 4: and the choice of two saturdays, one on my sister's

506
00:24:30,520 --> 00:24:33,719
Speaker 4: birthday and the other four days before or after future

507
00:24:33,720 --> 00:24:36,679
Speaker 4: sister in law's birthday. We picked the latter, but we

508
00:24:36,680 --> 00:24:39,159
Speaker 4: were firmly told that this was inappropriate because it was

509
00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:42,280
Speaker 4: future sister in law's birthday weekend and therefore, hey, what

510
00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:45,080
Speaker 4: ruin our birthday? My sister was fine, so we got

511
00:24:45,119 --> 00:24:48,640
Speaker 4: married on her actual birthday instead. Yeah, because she's an adult. Right.

512
00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:52,679
Speaker 4: Drama Number two the invite list. Future husband's family has

513
00:24:52,720 --> 00:24:55,320
Speaker 4: a very long list of family friends and was upset

514
00:24:55,320 --> 00:24:57,879
Speaker 4: that we did not invite them. They were also upset

515
00:24:57,920 --> 00:25:00,280
Speaker 4: that future husband decided not to invite this to the

516
00:25:00,280 --> 00:25:03,080
Speaker 4: family that no one likes. It was very much we

517
00:25:03,200 --> 00:25:06,760
Speaker 4: must keep up with a parents' conversation. The issue of

518
00:25:06,760 --> 00:25:09,359
Speaker 4: not inviting the other half of future husband's extended family

519
00:25:09,480 --> 00:25:14,160
Speaker 4: continued until future husband gave his parents an ultimatum, either

520
00:25:14,320 --> 00:25:17,639
Speaker 4: one side comes or none of them do. I was

521
00:25:17,840 --> 00:25:20,439
Speaker 4: very proud of how he stood up for himself. I

522
00:25:20,520 --> 00:25:22,280
Speaker 4: was not really a part of this, but it was

523
00:25:22,480 --> 00:25:26,000
Speaker 4: very stressful. I am good friends with future husband's relatives

524
00:25:26,040 --> 00:25:28,359
Speaker 4: that he was inviting, and they approached me saying they

525
00:25:28,359 --> 00:25:30,600
Speaker 4: would not be offended if we did not invite them

526
00:25:31,040 --> 00:25:34,280
Speaker 4: because they could see it was causing drama. So clearly

527
00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:38,119
Speaker 4: there were lots of mine the scenes discussions regardless of

528
00:25:38,160 --> 00:25:40,960
Speaker 4: their clear dislike of our plans. We went ahead, but

529
00:25:41,080 --> 00:25:45,679
Speaker 4: then it just got worse. Drama. Three cake gate, not

530
00:25:45,840 --> 00:25:49,919
Speaker 4: the cake. Future mother in law casually asked one day

531
00:25:49,920 --> 00:25:52,320
Speaker 4: if she could make the cake. I did not even

532
00:25:52,359 --> 00:25:54,480
Speaker 4: want a cake because they are a complete waste of

533
00:25:54,520 --> 00:25:56,960
Speaker 4: time and money. And future husband said he did not

534
00:25:57,080 --> 00:25:59,199
Speaker 4: want or to because he just wanted everyone to relax

535
00:25:59,240 --> 00:26:01,959
Speaker 4: and not do anything. We did not think anything of it.

536
00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:05,440
Speaker 4: Later I had breakfast with a friend future husband's relative,

537
00:26:05,480 --> 00:26:07,399
Speaker 4: and they said that future mother in law was upset

538
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:10,360
Speaker 4: I would not let her make our wedding cake. Why

539
00:26:10,359 --> 00:26:12,199
Speaker 4: would I not let future mother in law make our

540
00:26:12,200 --> 00:26:15,199
Speaker 4: wedding cake? All this again with no discussion to my

541
00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:18,400
Speaker 4: face about it. This escalated the point where we went

542
00:26:18,440 --> 00:26:21,760
Speaker 4: to shop, took future mother in law tasted cakes and

543
00:26:21,840 --> 00:26:24,240
Speaker 4: she bought us one a cake that I could not

544
00:26:24,320 --> 00:26:27,320
Speaker 4: eat because of my food intolerance. But whatever, I did

545
00:26:27,359 --> 00:26:30,639
Speaker 4: not care. Dram Another four the dress. I made a

546
00:26:30,720 --> 00:26:33,520
Speaker 4: very simple wedding dress with my mom, had a great

547
00:26:33,560 --> 00:26:35,919
Speaker 4: time making it, and we'll keep those memories closed for

548
00:26:35,960 --> 00:26:38,880
Speaker 4: a long time. Future mother in law and future sister

549
00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:41,880
Speaker 4: in law ambushed me in the kitchen one day asking

550
00:26:41,920 --> 00:26:43,800
Speaker 4: a bunch of questions about why I was doing what

551
00:26:43,880 --> 00:26:46,200
Speaker 4: I was doing, and suggested I check out x y

552
00:26:46,320 --> 00:26:49,000
Speaker 4: Z website if I wanted something cheap, or maybe she

553
00:26:49,040 --> 00:26:50,600
Speaker 4: wants something that she made with her mom.

554
00:26:50,960 --> 00:26:53,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe she wants something beautiful. She already has it

555
00:26:53,840 --> 00:26:54,960
Speaker 1: done and is already ready to go.

556
00:26:55,000 --> 00:26:55,480
Speaker 3: What are we doing?

557
00:26:55,640 --> 00:26:58,080
Speaker 4: But that was not the point. I just reiterated that

558
00:26:58,119 --> 00:27:00,639
Speaker 4: I was happy making my dress with my mom. They

559
00:27:00,680 --> 00:27:03,840
Speaker 4: were not happy with this. On the actual wedding day,

560
00:27:04,000 --> 00:27:06,560
Speaker 4: future husband and I got ready together and met everyone

561
00:27:06,600 --> 00:27:09,399
Speaker 4: at the bar. The only stressful thing about the wedding

562
00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:12,919
Speaker 4: was literally the in laws, but the actual wedding day

563
00:27:13,040 --> 00:27:14,960
Speaker 4: made it worse and I have spent a lot of

564
00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:17,280
Speaker 4: time trying to focus on the good things, but it

565
00:27:17,320 --> 00:27:23,320
Speaker 4: was very hard. Drama number five so surprised. Future sister

566
00:27:23,359 --> 00:27:25,200
Speaker 4: in law has this tone of voice she uses when

567
00:27:25,240 --> 00:27:28,439
Speaker 4: trying to be sincere. It's like Regina and Mean Girls

568
00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:31,960
Speaker 4: when she gives a compliment, but internally Hazza. The tone

569
00:27:31,960 --> 00:27:35,280
Speaker 4: of voice is always accompanied by nice a smile and

570
00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:39,000
Speaker 4: a high pitched tone. I've witnessed many Christmas presents accepted

571
00:27:39,040 --> 00:27:41,800
Speaker 4: with this insincere tone, only for them to be returned

572
00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:44,920
Speaker 4: the next day, So future sister in law walks into

573
00:27:44,960 --> 00:27:47,840
Speaker 4: the bar, gives me a very socially appropriate kiss on

574
00:27:47,880 --> 00:27:51,040
Speaker 4: each cheek, and then says, in her trying but feeling

575
00:27:51,119 --> 00:27:54,600
Speaker 4: to be sincere tone, oh oh pee, I'm so surprised

576
00:27:54,720 --> 00:27:57,520
Speaker 4: he looks so nice. I think it's safe to say

577
00:27:57,600 --> 00:27:59,959
Speaker 4: that one thing every wedding guest is expected to do

578
00:28:00,320 --> 00:28:03,280
Speaker 4: is say nice things to the bride, regardless of how

579
00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:06,000
Speaker 4: casual the wedding is. That was not a great start today,

580
00:28:06,680 --> 00:28:09,040
Speaker 4: and it was just an overall mean and witchy thing

581
00:28:09,080 --> 00:28:10,640
Speaker 4: to say, regardless of how I looked.

582
00:28:10,800 --> 00:28:15,399
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's very rused being like I'm surprised you look nice.

583
00:28:15,920 --> 00:28:17,679
Speaker 4: Surprise you look nice.

584
00:28:18,960 --> 00:28:19,240
Speaker 1: Wow.

585
00:28:19,280 --> 00:28:21,000
Speaker 4: I didn't know you could look that nice.

586
00:28:21,160 --> 00:28:22,040
Speaker 2: Yeah. Wow.

587
00:28:22,080 --> 00:28:25,040
Speaker 1: I expected you to look terrible today, but I guess

588
00:28:25,080 --> 00:28:25,760
Speaker 1: you look all right.

589
00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:30,200
Speaker 4: Drama number six speech My future father in law made

590
00:28:30,200 --> 00:28:33,760
Speaker 4: a speech that somehow included a discriminatory joke and finished

591
00:28:33,760 --> 00:28:36,840
Speaker 4: with a series of sestaball and chain jokes about how

592
00:28:36,840 --> 00:28:39,200
Speaker 4: my future husband would no longer have any money or

593
00:28:39,240 --> 00:28:41,520
Speaker 4: a life of his own, et cetera. My mom told

594
00:28:41,560 --> 00:28:43,800
Speaker 4: me later that she felt very uncomfortable and that the

595
00:28:43,840 --> 00:28:46,880
Speaker 4: things he said were unnecessary. She was right, and it

596
00:28:46,920 --> 00:28:48,719
Speaker 4: made me feel like his family thought I was some

597
00:28:48,800 --> 00:28:51,120
Speaker 4: kind of gold digger, which, as I was the only

598
00:28:51,120 --> 00:28:53,840
Speaker 4: person currently employed in our relationship at the time, could

599
00:28:53,840 --> 00:28:57,440
Speaker 4: not have been further from the truth. Drama Number seven,

600
00:28:57,760 --> 00:29:01,400
Speaker 4: the Little White Big Lie, was the icing on top

601
00:29:01,440 --> 00:29:04,440
Speaker 4: of what was generally a pretty crap wedding experience for me.

602
00:29:05,120 --> 00:29:09,200
Speaker 4: Despite our good intentions to have something fun and relaxing,

603
00:29:09,640 --> 00:29:11,960
Speaker 4: there will always be someone there to bring it down,

604
00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:14,440
Speaker 4: I guess. After the wedding, both my husband and I

605
00:29:14,560 --> 00:29:17,160
Speaker 4: were confronted with the fact that my mother in law

606
00:29:17,200 --> 00:29:19,959
Speaker 4: had lied to all of her friends and family about

607
00:29:19,960 --> 00:29:22,600
Speaker 4: our wedding. My husband found this out when he was

608
00:29:22,600 --> 00:29:25,440
Speaker 4: interrupted at dinner with a relative. After starting to talk

609
00:29:25,440 --> 00:29:28,280
Speaker 4: about our wedding, mother in law proceeded to tell an

610
00:29:28,240 --> 00:29:31,240
Speaker 4: elaborate story about how it was all a surprise, how

611
00:29:31,240 --> 00:29:33,320
Speaker 4: we just invited them for lunch, how brother in law

612
00:29:33,360 --> 00:29:35,160
Speaker 4: was in on it because they flew interstate for the

613
00:29:35,200 --> 00:29:37,760
Speaker 4: surprise lunch, and how they all turned up shock but

614
00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:40,640
Speaker 4: it was lovely. She said, we practically eloped, and that

615
00:29:40,680 --> 00:29:43,560
Speaker 4: they were sorry and they could not come. My husband

616
00:29:43,640 --> 00:29:46,200
Speaker 4: had to sit and listen to this unravel. He went

617
00:29:46,240 --> 00:29:48,719
Speaker 4: along with it because the alternative was telling his relative

618
00:29:48,760 --> 00:29:51,239
Speaker 4: that his mother was a liar. Tell them, yeah, let

619
00:29:51,320 --> 00:29:54,280
Speaker 4: him know, be like, oh mom, what are you doing?

620
00:29:54,760 --> 00:29:56,960
Speaker 4: That's not how it went, you know that. Lots of

621
00:29:56,960 --> 00:29:59,719
Speaker 4: discussions followed about how we felt his family was ashamed

622
00:29:59,760 --> 00:30:02,440
Speaker 4: of our choices. They denied it, but we then found

623
00:30:02,440 --> 00:30:05,840
Speaker 4: out they continue to perpetuate the lie. I experienced a

624
00:30:05,840 --> 00:30:08,480
Speaker 4: similar situation with some different family friends who asked me

625
00:30:08,520 --> 00:30:10,880
Speaker 4: why we had a surprise wedding. I was caught off

626
00:30:10,880 --> 00:30:13,040
Speaker 4: guard and went with the lie. But I was annoyed

627
00:30:13,080 --> 00:30:15,120
Speaker 4: and approached mother in law the next day. Stop going

628
00:30:15,160 --> 00:30:16,840
Speaker 4: with a lie. But you know it's not a lie.

629
00:30:17,320 --> 00:30:20,040
Speaker 4: You can listen to full episodes and stories just like this.

630
00:30:20,280 --> 00:30:22,880
Speaker 4: Just go to Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or iHeart Radio and

631
00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:23,880
Speaker 4: search a Pokey story time.

632
00:30:24,160 --> 00:30:26,600
Speaker 2: And that is the truest thing I've heard all day.

633
00:30:26,920 --> 00:30:28,680
Speaker 4: But do you have any final thoughts?

634
00:30:29,280 --> 00:30:31,920
Speaker 1: Man, Like, don't be afraid to put people on blast

635
00:30:32,040 --> 00:30:33,880
Speaker 1: when they're blasting you, dude, Like.

636
00:30:33,960 --> 00:30:36,360
Speaker 4: Actually, I mean like she's not even there, Like just

637
00:30:36,400 --> 00:30:38,760
Speaker 4: be like, no, that's not true, who told you that?

638
00:30:39,000 --> 00:30:40,640
Speaker 1: And then you don't have to be like and she's

639
00:30:40,680 --> 00:30:43,560
Speaker 1: a disgusting, despicable, irredeemable lie.

640
00:30:43,760 --> 00:30:45,600
Speaker 4: Just so, I like, you don't even have to call

641
00:30:45,640 --> 00:30:47,520
Speaker 4: her out by name. We can just say, oh, no,

642
00:30:47,560 --> 00:30:50,360
Speaker 4: we did it like this. I don't I don't know

643
00:30:50,360 --> 00:30:50,920
Speaker 4: where you hear that.

644
00:30:51,080 --> 00:30:53,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know why she thought that. That's weird though,

645
00:30:53,320 --> 00:30:55,320
Speaker 1: that she thought that. But that's not what happens.

646
00:30:55,320 --> 00:30:57,440
Speaker 4: That's not what happened. Yeah, stop going on with along

647
00:30:57,480 --> 00:30:59,840
Speaker 4: with the lie. Oh, he continues. I was upset and

648
00:31:00,040 --> 00:31:02,000
Speaker 4: asked her why she liked to everyone. She said she

649
00:31:02,040 --> 00:31:04,000
Speaker 4: didn't want to anyone's feelings to be hurt, that they

650
00:31:04,000 --> 00:31:06,120
Speaker 4: were not invited, and that it was not a big

651
00:31:06,160 --> 00:31:08,600
Speaker 4: deal because I lie all the time. I even lied

652
00:31:08,640 --> 00:31:09,959
Speaker 4: to my husband just this morning.

653
00:31:10,480 --> 00:31:13,880
Speaker 2: Okay, side, what a wonderful partner to have.

654
00:31:14,120 --> 00:31:17,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, wow, yikes, safe to say I have some trust

655
00:31:17,320 --> 00:31:20,280
Speaker 4: issues now ha ha ha. But my husband and I

656
00:31:20,320 --> 00:31:23,560
Speaker 4: are happily married and stronger than ever. And on that note,

657
00:31:23,600 --> 00:31:25,160
Speaker 4: I think I should leave it there. I should go

658
00:31:25,200 --> 00:31:28,360
Speaker 4: focus on the good things, right, Yes, And that is

659
00:31:28,440 --> 00:31:29,640
Speaker 4: the end of that story.

660
00:31:31,280 --> 00:31:33,360
Speaker 2: Hey, it's Sam. We'll get back to the stories. But

661
00:31:33,480 --> 00:31:35,200
Speaker 2: here's three minutes of ads from our sponsors.

662
00:31:35,960 --> 00:31:39,360
Speaker 4: I forbade my fiance to go to dinner with her boss.

663
00:31:39,560 --> 00:31:44,120
Speaker 2: She got furious.

664
00:31:44,200 --> 00:31:46,680
Speaker 4: I'm basically at the point of breaking off my relationship

665
00:31:46,680 --> 00:31:50,760
Speaker 4: with my fiance. WHOA, because I'm so frustrated by this

666
00:31:50,840 --> 00:31:54,920
Speaker 4: whole thing. I guess the question is among my last

667
00:31:54,960 --> 00:31:56,880
Speaker 4: solvos to see if I'm being an a hole and

668
00:31:56,960 --> 00:32:01,680
Speaker 4: unreasonable or if the problem is on her end. By

669
00:32:01,720 --> 00:32:03,680
Speaker 4: the way, this comes from Amma the Ahole John And

670
00:32:03,720 --> 00:32:05,120
Speaker 4: if you want to sumit your own stories, go to

671
00:32:05,160 --> 00:32:08,440
Speaker 4: our Slashowkay story Time Separate It. So been with fiance

672
00:32:08,600 --> 00:32:11,920
Speaker 4: for several years now. She recently graduated and got an

673
00:32:11,960 --> 00:32:15,080
Speaker 4: amazing char job with a pretty high profile we get

674
00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:18,520
Speaker 4: Your UI Charges Dropped type law firm. The guy who

675
00:32:18,560 --> 00:32:21,840
Speaker 4: started the firm is known across as being an ambulance chaser,

676
00:32:22,520 --> 00:32:26,760
Speaker 4: chaser sister, and scammer because very frankly, he's trying to

677
00:32:26,800 --> 00:32:29,840
Speaker 4: portray that in his commercials. I've met him a couple

678
00:32:29,920 --> 00:32:32,080
Speaker 4: of times, and in person he's a little better, but

679
00:32:32,120 --> 00:32:35,160
Speaker 4: I still feel kind of like I need a shower.

680
00:32:36,000 --> 00:32:39,000
Speaker 4: So right after New Year's wife came home and announced

681
00:32:39,000 --> 00:32:41,040
Speaker 4: that lawyer dude is taking the whole staff out to

682
00:32:41,040 --> 00:32:44,479
Speaker 4: celebrate on January twentieth because it was the firm's biggest

683
00:32:44,560 --> 00:32:47,600
Speaker 4: years ever. This is the timeline as near as I

684
00:32:47,640 --> 00:32:51,440
Speaker 4: can remember. January fifth, She tells me to keep January

685
00:32:51,480 --> 00:32:54,200
Speaker 4: twentieth open because s o's are invited. Ool, I can

686
00:32:54,240 --> 00:32:57,680
Speaker 4: do that. January eighth, Sorry she was mistaken. It's just

687
00:32:57,720 --> 00:32:59,440
Speaker 4: a work party. She tells me. It's cool if I

688
00:32:59,440 --> 00:33:03,480
Speaker 4: make other places that night, no problem. January thirteen, she

689
00:33:03,600 --> 00:33:05,880
Speaker 4: lets it slip. It's not really a party for the

690
00:33:05,880 --> 00:33:08,840
Speaker 4: old office, just for the people. Boss think we're part

691
00:33:08,880 --> 00:33:12,720
Speaker 4: of the success. I'm starting to get a little WTFI here.

692
00:33:13,240 --> 00:33:16,680
Speaker 4: January fourteenth. Miraculously, all the people going to dinner with

693
00:33:16,720 --> 00:33:19,040
Speaker 4: the boss are under the age of thirty and female.

694
00:33:19,840 --> 00:33:23,720
Speaker 4: Now alarm bells are really going off. January eighteenth, the

695
00:33:23,800 --> 00:33:27,000
Speaker 4: list is down to two people, my wife and another

696
00:33:27,080 --> 00:33:30,280
Speaker 4: new attorney. So if I'm hearing this correctly, the two

697
00:33:30,400 --> 00:33:33,959
Speaker 4: people mainly responsible for this twenty year old company's biggest

698
00:33:34,000 --> 00:33:37,720
Speaker 4: year ever are both recent college grads, both female, and

699
00:33:37,760 --> 00:33:42,120
Speaker 4: both around twenty five. Beyonce says, aren't you proud of me? Today?

700
00:33:42,200 --> 00:33:44,440
Speaker 4: The big day? The boss texts her at like eleven

701
00:33:44,480 --> 00:33:46,480
Speaker 4: am and says, hey, since this is supposed to be

702
00:33:46,560 --> 00:33:49,400
Speaker 4: a celebration. Don't drive, I'll send a car service for you.

703
00:33:50,720 --> 00:33:54,040
Speaker 4: Beyonce still doesn't smell anything fishy, so I ask her,

704
00:33:54,160 --> 00:33:56,400
Speaker 4: just for my own edification, to ask what he says.

705
00:33:56,440 --> 00:33:58,840
Speaker 4: If she tells him, that's a great offer. But my

706
00:33:58,880 --> 00:34:01,840
Speaker 4: fiance knows the restaurant and he can drive me. Boss

707
00:34:01,880 --> 00:34:04,960
Speaker 4: replies back in seconds. Sorry, I had to change restaurants

708
00:34:05,000 --> 00:34:07,360
Speaker 4: at the last minute. I'll send the car. My fiance

709
00:34:07,480 --> 00:34:10,840
Speaker 4: looks at me, apparently without the screeching submarine claxon and

710
00:34:10,920 --> 00:34:13,480
Speaker 4: cleag lights that are going off in my head, and says, see,

711
00:34:13,520 --> 00:34:16,160
Speaker 4: it's all cool. I'll just take the car service. I'm

712
00:34:16,440 --> 00:34:19,160
Speaker 4: freaking the f out. I told her that she can't go.

713
00:34:20,160 --> 00:34:22,360
Speaker 4: She called me a controlling ale. I told her that

714
00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:24,239
Speaker 4: the whole thing has been shady as f and I

715
00:34:24,280 --> 00:34:27,400
Speaker 4: relaid out the timeline I just posted above, using my

716
00:34:27,520 --> 00:34:30,359
Speaker 4: texts and emails from her as evidence. She said, that's

717
00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:32,600
Speaker 4: me ording evidence like this is an example of how

718
00:34:32,600 --> 00:34:34,279
Speaker 4: I'm a controlling a hole, and she wants to go

719
00:34:34,320 --> 00:34:36,480
Speaker 4: to dinner mill more than ever. I told her I

720
00:34:36,520 --> 00:34:38,759
Speaker 4: might be an ahole, but I'm not stupid. She told

721
00:34:38,760 --> 00:34:41,000
Speaker 4: me over and over again. He's married he can't do

722
00:34:41,040 --> 00:34:43,120
Speaker 4: anything that will affect his marriage. So you're being the

723
00:34:43,160 --> 00:34:45,680
Speaker 4: stupid one that leads me to believe that even she

724
00:34:45,840 --> 00:34:49,440
Speaker 4: understands the larger implications that are at play here. She

725
00:34:49,480 --> 00:34:51,560
Speaker 4: locked herself in her bedroom and hasn't come out for

726
00:34:51,560 --> 00:34:52,319
Speaker 4: at least an hour.

727
00:34:52,560 --> 00:34:54,480
Speaker 2: She's like, he's married exactly.

728
00:34:54,520 --> 00:34:57,160
Speaker 4: I think that. I mean, like she's definitely naive, like

729
00:34:57,200 --> 00:34:59,360
Speaker 4: that's a fault, but like I think, I think she

730
00:34:59,480 --> 00:35:00,520
Speaker 4: might just be naive.

731
00:35:01,080 --> 00:35:04,600
Speaker 1: It's so naive though I know, well he's married and

732
00:35:04,640 --> 00:35:07,760
Speaker 1: no one's ever did on there spouse.

733
00:35:08,080 --> 00:35:10,960
Speaker 4: I agree. I agree. I don't know what to do.

734
00:35:11,200 --> 00:35:13,120
Speaker 4: I can't beat the door down or yell at her.

735
00:35:13,160 --> 00:35:15,200
Speaker 4: And I think if this is one of those situations,

736
00:35:15,200 --> 00:35:17,600
Speaker 4: whether she was on the other foot, she'd be freaking

737
00:35:17,640 --> 00:35:19,919
Speaker 4: the she'd be freaking the f out. And I see

738
00:35:19,960 --> 00:35:23,000
Speaker 4: her reaction and just call it off. Am I the

739
00:35:23,040 --> 00:35:26,080
Speaker 4: a hole? And there is an edit? It's five point

740
00:35:26,080 --> 00:35:28,480
Speaker 4: thirty here. The car service picked her up at five fifteen.

741
00:35:28,680 --> 00:35:30,840
Speaker 4: I guess it's up to fate now, whether I'm controlling

742
00:35:30,880 --> 00:35:33,360
Speaker 4: a hole or if she just didn't see whatever was

743
00:35:33,400 --> 00:35:36,520
Speaker 4: coming uh and at it too. She just got home

744
00:35:36,560 --> 00:35:38,640
Speaker 4: and only said I don't want to fing talk about it.

745
00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:41,800
Speaker 4: She's back talking to who I assume is her sister.

746
00:35:42,520 --> 00:35:45,200
Speaker 4: I'm defying my every desire at Evesdrop. So I don't

747
00:35:45,200 --> 00:35:47,560
Speaker 4: know what happened. It's only eight forty five, so I

748
00:35:47,560 --> 00:35:50,799
Speaker 4: don't think anything super crazy happened. I'm just glad she's home.

749
00:35:51,320 --> 00:35:55,320
Speaker 4: If it's appropriate, I'll update again when I know more.

750
00:35:55,840 --> 00:35:57,479
Speaker 2: Well, it looks like she figured it out.

751
00:35:57,600 --> 00:35:59,040
Speaker 4: But do you do you think that she went into

752
00:35:59,080 --> 00:36:00,719
Speaker 4: it knowing you now?

753
00:36:00,840 --> 00:36:02,759
Speaker 2: I think I think she did go into it being

754
00:36:02,800 --> 00:36:03,839
Speaker 2: like this no one.

755
00:36:03,960 --> 00:36:06,600
Speaker 1: He just won't accept that I'm just like the best

756
00:36:06,600 --> 00:36:09,160
Speaker 1: worker ever and that I'm so cool and my boss

757
00:36:09,239 --> 00:36:12,480
Speaker 1: wants to give me a million dollars because I'm just cool.

758
00:36:12,920 --> 00:36:16,640
Speaker 4: Yeah. I think that she was so defensive and being

759
00:36:16,719 --> 00:36:20,120
Speaker 4: naive and then she went there and probably he hit

760
00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:20,800
Speaker 4: on her and she's.

761
00:36:20,680 --> 00:36:23,080
Speaker 5: Like once sometimes bosses are like that, but not I

762
00:36:23,080 --> 00:36:23,920
Speaker 5: don't in this case.

763
00:36:24,080 --> 00:36:25,239
Speaker 2: Sometimes yeah, but.

764
00:36:25,480 --> 00:36:28,040
Speaker 5: Like there's very rare, Like the bosses are like really

765
00:36:28,080 --> 00:36:30,160
Speaker 5: cool and they do like I'll take I'll like it's

766
00:36:30,320 --> 00:36:32,400
Speaker 5: gonna be like a team dinner or like it's a raise,

767
00:36:32,520 --> 00:36:34,960
Speaker 5: you know, or like you know what, happy like happy

768
00:36:35,000 --> 00:36:36,480
Speaker 5: birthday or happy holiday, something like that.

769
00:36:36,640 --> 00:36:38,719
Speaker 4: I honestly think that if OPI had like I'm not

770
00:36:38,760 --> 00:36:40,640
Speaker 4: blaming it on Pe, but I do think that if

771
00:36:40,640 --> 00:36:44,319
Speaker 4: he had approached the conversation with her differently of like

772
00:36:44,600 --> 00:36:48,000
Speaker 4: less emphasizing that she was being stupid. And again, it's

773
00:36:48,000 --> 00:36:50,040
Speaker 4: not his fault because like she was being I.

774
00:36:50,040 --> 00:36:53,359
Speaker 1: Don't know of any level of to be naive enough

775
00:36:53,360 --> 00:36:57,520
Speaker 1: to be like, he's married, there's nothing that could happen

776
00:36:57,560 --> 00:36:59,080
Speaker 1: because he's married.

777
00:36:59,480 --> 00:37:01,840
Speaker 4: Absolutely absolutely, but it is sure.

778
00:37:01,719 --> 00:37:04,800
Speaker 1: That's crazy, but it's a delusion. That's not even naivety,

779
00:37:04,840 --> 00:37:06,440
Speaker 1: that's your being. You're deluded.

780
00:37:06,600 --> 00:37:08,600
Speaker 4: I think it would have probably been a more effective

781
00:37:08,600 --> 00:37:11,040
Speaker 4: conversation if he had been like, let's focus on your

782
00:37:11,080 --> 00:37:13,719
Speaker 4: safety rather than you're stupid. He's trying to look up

783
00:37:13,760 --> 00:37:17,239
Speaker 4: with you. Another edit, This really doesn't pertain to am

784
00:37:17,320 --> 00:37:19,600
Speaker 4: I the ale anymore, just people asking for an update.

785
00:37:19,880 --> 00:37:22,440
Speaker 4: She gets to dinner and it's just her, a coworker,

786
00:37:22,440 --> 00:37:25,080
Speaker 4: and her boss in a private dining room at a hotel.

787
00:37:25,640 --> 00:37:27,920
Speaker 4: The boss straight up says he's banging another girl and

788
00:37:27,960 --> 00:37:29,439
Speaker 4: wants my fiance to join them.

789
00:37:29,840 --> 00:37:33,880
Speaker 1: Oh, congratulations, you've earned the quarterly reward.

790
00:37:34,320 --> 00:37:37,520
Speaker 4: Also, I feel so sad yeah, this woman.

791
00:37:37,640 --> 00:37:38,200
Speaker 2: No, that sucks.

792
00:37:38,280 --> 00:37:41,680
Speaker 4: I feel so so like this literally like hurts my heart.

793
00:37:42,080 --> 00:37:44,200
Speaker 4: He has an understanding with his wife and says he

794
00:37:44,239 --> 00:37:47,120
Speaker 4: can do amazing things for my fiance. She's pissed. She

795
00:37:47,160 --> 00:37:49,080
Speaker 4: didn't see this coming, but she's still mad at me

796
00:37:49,160 --> 00:37:51,799
Speaker 4: for being controlling. She's not happy at all and is

797
00:37:51,840 --> 00:37:54,400
Speaker 4: talking about breaking up. Sucks all around, But I'm relieved

798
00:37:54,400 --> 00:37:56,400
Speaker 4: she's safe. Just giving her some space for a while,

799
00:37:57,080 --> 00:37:58,360
Speaker 4: and there is an update.

800
00:37:58,920 --> 00:38:00,880
Speaker 2: If she breaks up for you for this, that's the

801
00:38:01,280 --> 00:38:02,400
Speaker 2: most ridiculous.

802
00:38:02,000 --> 00:38:03,960
Speaker 4: Thing I've I think that this was all just like

803
00:38:04,200 --> 00:38:08,360
Speaker 4: the conversation was not had in an effective way. Update

804
00:38:08,600 --> 00:38:11,040
Speaker 4: fair enough. She didn't speak to me all day Monday,

805
00:38:11,080 --> 00:38:13,279
Speaker 4: and the last words I heard from her were Sunday night.

806
00:38:13,360 --> 00:38:16,719
Speaker 4: After she got home, she slammed the door to our bedroom, saying,

807
00:38:16,719 --> 00:38:19,680
Speaker 4: you're still a controlling a hole and we're breaking up. Wow.

808
00:38:19,880 --> 00:38:22,760
Speaker 4: Her nuclear bomb is always saying we're breaking up whenever

809
00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:25,200
Speaker 4: she doesn't have the upperhand in an argument. So I

810
00:38:25,239 --> 00:38:26,080
Speaker 4: didn't make much of it.

811
00:38:26,400 --> 00:38:30,080
Speaker 2: That's leave this really, that's unhealthy. I get out of there,

812
00:38:30,520 --> 00:38:31,160
Speaker 2: get out.

813
00:38:31,520 --> 00:38:33,719
Speaker 4: In reality, I was just relieved that she was home

814
00:38:33,719 --> 00:38:36,080
Speaker 4: and apparently nothing bad happened at the dinner, so, like

815
00:38:36,120 --> 00:38:38,279
Speaker 4: I said, Monday, she didn't say a word to me.

816
00:38:38,880 --> 00:38:41,399
Speaker 4: I was only able to get into our bedroom into

817
00:38:41,400 --> 00:38:44,239
Speaker 4: our bedroom to grab some clothes, and I couched it

818
00:38:44,280 --> 00:38:45,279
Speaker 4: again Monday night.

819
00:38:45,560 --> 00:38:46,080
Speaker 2: Whatever.

820
00:38:46,360 --> 00:38:49,960
Speaker 4: She was pissed, she was embarrassed that she didn't see

821
00:38:50,000 --> 00:38:52,600
Speaker 4: it coming, and she was angry at me. I figured

822
00:38:52,600 --> 00:38:55,240
Speaker 4: i'd give her some space, so I did. Tuesday morning,

823
00:38:55,280 --> 00:38:57,680
Speaker 4: I noticed she was getting ready for work. I couldn't

824
00:38:57,719 --> 00:39:01,359
Speaker 4: keep my mouth shut any longer, and increduous, incredulously asked

825
00:39:01,360 --> 00:39:03,480
Speaker 4: if she was really going back to that effing job.

826
00:39:04,080 --> 00:39:06,200
Speaker 4: She said, why, what a't I? I told her because

827
00:39:06,200 --> 00:39:08,200
Speaker 4: the affing owner of the company had spent a month

828
00:39:08,239 --> 00:39:10,880
Speaker 4: manipulating her into a threesome with this other little side piece.

829
00:39:11,440 --> 00:39:14,000
Speaker 4: She said, I was an effing idiot. I was flabbergasted.

830
00:39:14,360 --> 00:39:16,720
Speaker 2: Is this law? Because that makes sense.

831
00:39:16,920 --> 00:39:20,000
Speaker 1: Your girlfriend is a cutthroat and she will stop at

832
00:39:20,080 --> 00:39:23,360
Speaker 1: nothing to attain more levels of power and prestige.

833
00:39:23,920 --> 00:39:24,600
Speaker 4: She's a lawyer.

834
00:39:24,920 --> 00:39:28,160
Speaker 1: If anything, she's probably more mad that you're together, so

835
00:39:28,200 --> 00:39:31,720
Speaker 1: that she couldn't have like manipulated that opportunity in her favor.

836
00:39:31,760 --> 00:39:33,200
Speaker 4: Somebody, I don't I don't agree with that.

837
00:39:33,320 --> 00:39:36,280
Speaker 2: I mean, I'm not condoning the boss's actions.

838
00:39:36,320 --> 00:39:38,239
Speaker 1: I'm just saying when I didn't realize this whole time,

839
00:39:38,239 --> 00:39:40,360
Speaker 1: I saw a comment that said something about lawyers.

840
00:39:40,560 --> 00:39:42,480
Speaker 2: I think that the fact that she's a lawyer.

841
00:39:42,320 --> 00:39:44,480
Speaker 1: Is like that a lot of that makes sense to

842
00:39:44,520 --> 00:39:46,680
Speaker 1: me just because of lawyers, not because she's a woman

843
00:39:46,760 --> 00:39:47,840
Speaker 1: or a man or anything.

844
00:39:48,080 --> 00:39:50,640
Speaker 4: I just I think that, like, separate from this, I

845
00:39:50,640 --> 00:39:53,440
Speaker 4: think they should break up because clearly the communication is

846
00:39:53,480 --> 00:39:56,000
Speaker 4: just so like not there and her being like, oh,

847
00:39:56,000 --> 00:39:57,480
Speaker 4: I'm breaking up and hop people be like, oh yeah.

848
00:39:57,520 --> 00:40:00,000
Speaker 4: She always says that that's messed up. As she stopped

849
00:40:00,040 --> 00:40:01,960
Speaker 4: around the house putting on her shoes and makeup, I

850
00:40:02,000 --> 00:40:03,560
Speaker 4: told her that if she showed up to the office

851
00:40:03,560 --> 00:40:06,439
Speaker 4: today and didn't quit or follow up with the state bar,

852
00:40:07,040 --> 00:40:09,000
Speaker 4: he would know that she was okay with what happened,

853
00:40:09,080 --> 00:40:11,920
Speaker 4: at least on the surface, even if she didn't have

854
00:40:11,960 --> 00:40:13,839
Speaker 4: spicy sleep with him. He now knew that she had

855
00:40:13,880 --> 00:40:16,200
Speaker 4: a really high tolerance for his bs and he was

856
00:40:16,280 --> 00:40:19,040
Speaker 4: going to keep working at her. I also reminded her

857
00:40:19,080 --> 00:40:21,120
Speaker 4: that she had an MBA with a focus in HR

858
00:40:21,160 --> 00:40:23,520
Speaker 4: and it shouldn't take an e fing redneck auto mechanic

859
00:40:23,560 --> 00:40:26,440
Speaker 4: to tell her the scrap I own a foreign specialty

860
00:40:26,440 --> 00:40:29,880
Speaker 4: auto repair facility with my uncle. Her last words to

861
00:40:29,920 --> 00:40:32,759
Speaker 4: me were, yes, fing Ale, I am the professional you aren't,

862
00:40:32,840 --> 00:40:36,719
Speaker 4: and she slammed the door. So Tuesday, I had no

863
00:40:36,840 --> 00:40:38,759
Speaker 4: idea what I was going to do. I knew in

864
00:40:38,800 --> 00:40:41,800
Speaker 4: my heart I needed to end the relationship. Her situation

865
00:40:41,880 --> 00:40:45,040
Speaker 4: with her boss, notwithstanding her methods of fighting, name calling,

866
00:40:45,120 --> 00:40:48,120
Speaker 4: silent treatment were just not acceptable, but I still wasn't

867
00:40:48,120 --> 00:40:50,839
Speaker 4: sure from her standpoint. A lot of women don't leave

868
00:40:50,880 --> 00:40:53,440
Speaker 4: those situations or even I mean, that was the whole

869
00:40:53,480 --> 00:40:57,600
Speaker 4: METO movement. Like a lot of women will not talk

870
00:40:57,680 --> 00:41:00,680
Speaker 4: about the situations that happened with people in you know,

871
00:41:00,719 --> 00:41:02,640
Speaker 4: positions of power because they don't want to get fired,

872
00:41:02,640 --> 00:41:04,320
Speaker 4: they don't want to get blacklisted from things.

873
00:41:04,719 --> 00:41:06,800
Speaker 1: Well, it's like it's really easy to have a moral

874
00:41:06,920 --> 00:41:10,799
Speaker 1: stance when there's like no actual stakes for you.

875
00:41:10,960 --> 00:41:12,520
Speaker 2: But it's like in this case, it's like.

876
00:41:12,480 --> 00:41:15,040
Speaker 1: There are she's gonna lose her job, she's gonna lose

877
00:41:15,040 --> 00:41:16,960
Speaker 1: her reputation, she's gonna lose her Yeah.

878
00:41:17,000 --> 00:41:18,440
Speaker 2: It's like, I mean people go.

879
00:41:18,400 --> 00:41:20,240
Speaker 4: Around and say, oh, well, she was just a pretty face.

880
00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:23,839
Speaker 4: You just wanted to Baffer. But on the other side

881
00:41:23,840 --> 00:41:27,160
Speaker 4: of the relationship, I completely agree she's bad at communicating.

882
00:41:27,440 --> 00:41:29,480
Speaker 4: She's blaming op for all of this thing, But I

883
00:41:29,480 --> 00:41:31,239
Speaker 4: am calling that telling them that they're going to break

884
00:41:31,280 --> 00:41:33,560
Speaker 4: up relationship is clearly not working at all.

885
00:41:33,680 --> 00:41:33,879
Speaker 2: Yeah.

886
00:41:33,920 --> 00:41:35,759
Speaker 4: Yeah, so I feel like that those are kind.

887
00:41:35,640 --> 00:41:38,160
Speaker 1: Of anytime you have a case where your partner is

888
00:41:38,200 --> 00:41:41,520
Speaker 1: like using, we're gonna just break up, like in an argument,

889
00:41:41,800 --> 00:41:45,440
Speaker 1: because like that's listen to them, Listen to them and

890
00:41:45,480 --> 00:41:46,160
Speaker 1: break up with them.

891
00:41:46,239 --> 00:41:46,439
Speaker 2: Yeah.

892
00:41:46,480 --> 00:41:49,520
Speaker 4: I agree. She got home Tuesday and was clearly rattled

893
00:41:49,560 --> 00:41:51,759
Speaker 4: by something. She was still silent, but it was a

894
00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:54,759
Speaker 4: sad silent, not an angry silent, if that makes sense.

895
00:41:55,680 --> 00:41:57,960
Speaker 4: She absolutely would not tell me what was wrong, but

896
00:41:58,000 --> 00:42:00,160
Speaker 4: she didn't lock herself in the room this time. She

897
00:42:00,200 --> 00:42:02,960
Speaker 4: sat almost catatonic on the couch watching a Big Bang Theory,

898
00:42:03,000 --> 00:42:06,320
Speaker 4: which he hates. My assumption she afked him her or

899
00:42:06,400 --> 00:42:08,680
Speaker 4: both she gave in to him. I have no proof

900
00:42:08,719 --> 00:42:10,640
Speaker 4: of this, but after all the bs, after the quick

901
00:42:10,719 --> 00:42:12,440
Speaker 4: change in her behavior, it's the only thing I can

902
00:42:12,520 --> 00:42:15,920
Speaker 4: think happened. In my head and heart. We are broken up.

903
00:42:16,160 --> 00:42:18,560
Speaker 4: It's not just a matter of separating our crap figuring

904
00:42:18,600 --> 00:42:20,280
Speaker 4: out what to do with the lease on our apartment,

905
00:42:20,800 --> 00:42:23,080
Speaker 4: canceling the small amount of wedding planning we've done, and

906
00:42:23,120 --> 00:42:26,799
Speaker 4: oh yeah, telling her she may be feeling She may

907
00:42:26,840 --> 00:42:29,120
Speaker 4: be feeling the same way and be done with me too,

908
00:42:29,200 --> 00:42:31,479
Speaker 4: which honestly may make this easier for everyone. Brother.

909
00:42:31,640 --> 00:42:34,120
Speaker 2: She said that she was done.

910
00:42:34,200 --> 00:42:36,479
Speaker 4: She said she was breaking out with you. My heart

911
00:42:36,520 --> 00:42:38,279
Speaker 4: goes out to her because I do care about her,

912
00:42:38,320 --> 00:42:40,279
Speaker 4: and if she did have spicy sleep with her balls

913
00:42:40,360 --> 00:42:44,120
Speaker 4: under his BS pretense, I imagine she feels like crap. But

914
00:42:44,200 --> 00:42:46,759
Speaker 4: I tried to warner. I saw it coming from a

915
00:42:46,800 --> 00:42:49,520
Speaker 4: mile away. No, I didn't use the correct words and

916
00:42:49,600 --> 00:42:51,960
Speaker 4: trying to warner, and I take no pleasure in being right,

917
00:42:52,440 --> 00:42:56,200
Speaker 4: but I did try and edit. She's home about two

918
00:42:56,239 --> 00:42:58,120
Speaker 4: and a half hours early. She said she wants to

919
00:42:58,120 --> 00:43:00,719
Speaker 4: take a shower and talk after she's done. I really

920
00:43:00,760 --> 00:43:03,920
Speaker 4: don't want to do another update, but I will. Obviously,

921
00:43:04,000 --> 00:43:06,120
Speaker 4: this is so much passed whether I'm an Ahle or not,

922
00:43:06,440 --> 00:43:08,920
Speaker 4: and just into keeping people who wanted to know informed.

923
00:43:09,600 --> 00:43:13,120
Speaker 4: For some people, I'm a victim, for others, I'm a victimizer.

924
00:43:13,280 --> 00:43:15,640
Speaker 4: I asked for people's opinions, so I will try very

925
00:43:15,640 --> 00:43:17,799
Speaker 4: hard to keep both in mind going forward and see

926
00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:21,080
Speaker 4: her thank you for your input. So update. She got

927
00:43:21,080 --> 00:43:23,240
Speaker 4: home at three point thirty. She was still very pissy

928
00:43:23,680 --> 00:43:25,560
Speaker 4: and told me not to ask her any questions until

929
00:43:25,600 --> 00:43:27,240
Speaker 4: she got out of the shower and said she wanted

930
00:43:27,280 --> 00:43:30,160
Speaker 4: to talk them. She usually gets home at six pm

931
00:43:30,200 --> 00:43:32,560
Speaker 4: on the dot, so I knew something was up. I

932
00:43:32,600 --> 00:43:34,960
Speaker 4: said that was fine, but was literally on pins and

933
00:43:34,960 --> 00:43:37,359
Speaker 4: needles until she came back to our computer room where

934
00:43:37,360 --> 00:43:40,400
Speaker 4: I was working around four fifteen. She comes out with

935
00:43:40,440 --> 00:43:42,720
Speaker 4: a towel wrapped around her head and just one around

936
00:43:42,760 --> 00:43:45,040
Speaker 4: her waist. In my head, I figured if she was

937
00:43:45,040 --> 00:43:47,440
Speaker 4: really breaking up with me, she wouldn't let me see

938
00:43:47,960 --> 00:43:52,040
Speaker 4: or unclothed. It wasn't a spicy related gesture by any stretch,

939
00:43:52,080 --> 00:43:54,200
Speaker 4: but it also showed that she wasn't covering up around me.

940
00:43:54,840 --> 00:43:56,759
Speaker 4: I took that as a good sign, because I wasn't

941
00:43:56,760 --> 00:43:59,200
Speaker 4: sure about breaking up with her as nutty as I

942
00:43:59,239 --> 00:44:01,520
Speaker 4: made her deserve it the sound. She has never had

943
00:44:01,560 --> 00:44:04,960
Speaker 4: compunctions about apologizing when she's wrong. She said she wanted

944
00:44:05,000 --> 00:44:07,239
Speaker 4: to say she was very sorry for all the things

945
00:44:07,239 --> 00:44:09,480
Speaker 4: she had said to me starting on Sunday. She was

946
00:44:09,520 --> 00:44:12,719
Speaker 4: sorry for throwing her shoe at me. Oh yes, for

947
00:44:12,800 --> 00:44:16,200
Speaker 4: the silent treatment and for doubting my judgment. I told

948
00:44:16,239 --> 00:44:18,640
Speaker 4: her that I appreciated it. She told me that she

949
00:44:18,760 --> 00:44:21,880
Speaker 4: quit yesterday. I told her that I very much agreed

950
00:44:21,920 --> 00:44:24,080
Speaker 4: with that. She explained that yesterday she went into the

951
00:44:24,120 --> 00:44:26,239
Speaker 4: office and the boss, an owner, was waiting for her

952
00:44:26,239 --> 00:44:28,480
Speaker 4: in her office. I you know, I just also want

953
00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:30,200
Speaker 4: to say, I feel like, oh, Pete did really jump

954
00:44:30,239 --> 00:44:32,440
Speaker 4: to conclusions about her screen er boss.

955
00:44:33,040 --> 00:44:35,520
Speaker 1: It was probably more just like a like, yeah, now

956
00:44:35,560 --> 00:44:37,840
Speaker 1: I really do have to reanalyze, like what I actually

957
00:44:37,920 --> 00:44:39,480
Speaker 1: even want out of this job and what I.

958
00:44:39,400 --> 00:44:40,160
Speaker 4: Want out of the Yeah.

959
00:44:40,239 --> 00:44:41,920
Speaker 1: I felt like that was a pretty unfair jump, and

960
00:44:41,920 --> 00:44:44,960
Speaker 1: it's clearly but it's again just another great indicator that

961
00:44:45,000 --> 00:44:49,240
Speaker 1: this yeah working and y'all to split.

962
00:44:49,760 --> 00:44:53,480
Speaker 4: The law firm is an old converted historic house near downtown.

963
00:44:53,800 --> 00:44:55,520
Speaker 4: Most of the staff work and what used to be

964
00:44:55,560 --> 00:44:58,360
Speaker 4: the main house, but my fiance's office was literally the

965
00:44:58,400 --> 00:45:02,240
Speaker 4: outdoor shed grot. It's a very nice and comfortable conversion,

966
00:45:02,280 --> 00:45:05,640
Speaker 4: but it's still separated from the main house, so him

967
00:45:05,680 --> 00:45:07,560
Speaker 4: sitting in her office means he had to go out

968
00:45:07,560 --> 00:45:10,200
Speaker 4: into the backyard find a key. He doesn't usually have

969
00:45:10,480 --> 00:45:13,960
Speaker 4: unlockerr space and wait for her. On the first day

970
00:45:14,000 --> 00:45:16,920
Speaker 4: back from a holiday, he told her he wanted to

971
00:45:16,960 --> 00:45:19,760
Speaker 4: make sure there were no misunderstandings from the night prior

972
00:45:20,480 --> 00:45:22,880
Speaker 4: and to ensure that all the doors weren't shut or

973
00:45:22,920 --> 00:45:26,000
Speaker 4: some such nonsense. She told him that she was deeply

974
00:45:26,080 --> 00:45:28,160
Speaker 4: upset by his proposal and didn't know what she was

975
00:45:28,200 --> 00:45:30,319
Speaker 4: going to do. I guess. He told her that her

976
00:45:30,400 --> 00:45:32,479
Speaker 4: value in the company could either go up or down

977
00:45:32,520 --> 00:45:34,360
Speaker 4: depending on how she decided to proceed.

978
00:45:35,120 --> 00:45:37,680
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, and then that walking out after that, that's

979
00:45:37,680 --> 00:45:40,439
Speaker 1: a good that's the right move. You can't now you're

980
00:45:40,520 --> 00:45:43,080
Speaker 1: you're a hostage. After that point, like she.

981
00:45:43,040 --> 00:45:44,920
Speaker 4: Said that, she walked out on the spot and didn't

982
00:45:44,920 --> 00:45:46,960
Speaker 4: go back to work. She spent the rest of the

983
00:45:47,000 --> 00:45:48,920
Speaker 4: day with her sister trying to figure out what she

984
00:45:49,000 --> 00:45:51,600
Speaker 4: was going to do. That was yesterday, and I guess

985
00:45:51,600 --> 00:45:54,600
Speaker 4: she still doesn't know. She spent all day today looking

986
00:45:54,640 --> 00:45:57,440
Speaker 4: for other jobs and sitting in the employment office of

987
00:45:57,480 --> 00:46:00,640
Speaker 4: her MBA program talking with her advisor. I asked her

988
00:46:00,680 --> 00:46:02,720
Speaker 4: why she didn't just tell me any of this yesterday

989
00:46:02,760 --> 00:46:05,080
Speaker 4: and why she screamed at me. She said she was

990
00:46:05,120 --> 00:46:07,400
Speaker 4: sorry again, but she was a little shell shocked that

991
00:46:07,440 --> 00:46:10,399
Speaker 4: she faced serious spicy related harassment in her first job

992
00:46:10,440 --> 00:46:13,000
Speaker 4: out of the gate, and honestly didn't even know what

993
00:46:13,000 --> 00:46:14,920
Speaker 4: she wanted to say to me. I told her that

994
00:46:14,960 --> 00:46:17,719
Speaker 4: the silent treatment really hurt and allowed my imagination to

995
00:46:17,800 --> 00:46:20,120
Speaker 4: run wild. I didn't tell her what I said here,

996
00:46:20,200 --> 00:46:23,520
Speaker 4: though she apologized again, saying the way she acted throughout

997
00:46:23,560 --> 00:46:26,560
Speaker 4: the entire event wasn't fair. I told her that I

998
00:46:26,600 --> 00:46:29,240
Speaker 4: really do love her, but I hadn't slept in two nights.

999
00:46:29,760 --> 00:46:32,120
Speaker 4: I was exhausted, hurt, and didn't know what to do.

1000
00:46:32,360 --> 00:46:33,960
Speaker 4: So I was going to stay at my uncle's house

1001
00:46:33,960 --> 00:46:36,120
Speaker 4: for at least a few nights to sleep if nothing else.

1002
00:46:36,960 --> 00:46:39,719
Speaker 4: You said that was fine, and that she'd wait as

1003
00:46:39,719 --> 00:46:42,000
Speaker 4: long as I wanted her to. I told her that

1004
00:46:42,040 --> 00:46:44,080
Speaker 4: I think we need counseling so we can learn how

1005
00:46:44,080 --> 00:46:47,480
Speaker 4: to talk to each other better. She agreed, so after that,

1006
00:46:47,640 --> 00:46:49,200
Speaker 4: I packed up a bag and I'm now at my

1007
00:46:49,280 --> 00:46:52,240
Speaker 4: uncle's house. She did give me a bare chisted hug

1008
00:46:52,280 --> 00:46:54,480
Speaker 4: and a kiss him a cheek on my way out

1009
00:46:54,480 --> 00:46:57,840
Speaker 4: the door, which was pretty nice. But right now I

1010
00:46:57,920 --> 00:47:01,239
Speaker 4: need some sleep, But I do know I want to

1011
00:47:01,280 --> 00:47:03,719
Speaker 4: stay with her. I never I need to never use

1012
00:47:03,760 --> 00:47:06,520
Speaker 4: words like you can't go ever again, I do agree

1013
00:47:06,560 --> 00:47:08,600
Speaker 4: with that. I feel like you could have again. I

1014
00:47:08,600 --> 00:47:10,960
Speaker 4: think it was phrasing too in part. Again she did

1015
00:47:11,040 --> 00:47:13,400
Speaker 4: not react well. But I think also you can't be

1016
00:47:13,480 --> 00:47:16,040
Speaker 4: like you can't do that. I think it's I worry

1017
00:47:16,040 --> 00:47:17,480
Speaker 4: that this will happen if.

1018
00:47:17,320 --> 00:47:17,879
Speaker 2: You go there.

1019
00:47:18,080 --> 00:47:20,480
Speaker 4: I really do love her. We are fine for money

1020
00:47:20,520 --> 00:47:23,200
Speaker 4: without her working. I am co owner of an auto

1021
00:47:23,280 --> 00:47:25,040
Speaker 4: a pair of business with my uncle, and we have

1022
00:47:25,080 --> 00:47:27,200
Speaker 4: a great few years. And we have had a great

1023
00:47:27,200 --> 00:47:30,200
Speaker 4: few years. What I don't know and didn't ask yet,

1024
00:47:30,239 --> 00:47:32,640
Speaker 4: at least, what is she going to do about her boss,

1025
00:47:33,080 --> 00:47:36,240
Speaker 4: how this affects her future employment, That she will realize

1026
00:47:36,239 --> 00:47:38,000
Speaker 4: we are fine without her working and that she can

1027
00:47:38,040 --> 00:47:40,280
Speaker 4: take her time finding a good job with a good boss.

1028
00:47:40,719 --> 00:47:43,319
Speaker 4: But you know what, it's always good listening to full

1029
00:47:43,400 --> 00:47:46,040
Speaker 4: episodes of stories just like this. Just go to Spotify,

1030
00:47:46,080 --> 00:47:49,719
Speaker 4: Apple Podcasts, or iHeartRadio and search up ok storytime. But

1031
00:47:49,800 --> 00:47:52,840
Speaker 4: there is a little bit left to this story. I

1032
00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:55,640
Speaker 4: don't know if their relationship will work, but I do

1033
00:47:55,680 --> 00:47:58,759
Speaker 4: think that counseling is a necessity regardless.

1034
00:47:59,360 --> 00:48:04,040
Speaker 1: It's just now working out, man, That's all that is. Yeah,

1035
00:48:04,080 --> 00:48:05,399
Speaker 1: it's just not working out.

1036
00:48:05,760 --> 00:48:07,880
Speaker 4: I'm sure there are a million other things I'm forgetting

1037
00:48:08,000 --> 00:48:10,880
Speaker 4: or questions I'm not answering. I think the mods are

1038
00:48:10,880 --> 00:48:14,560
Speaker 4: sick on this thread. In comments common one, her nuclear

1039
00:48:14,600 --> 00:48:17,080
Speaker 4: bomb is always saying we're breaking up whenever she doesn't

1040
00:48:17,120 --> 00:48:19,400
Speaker 4: have the uphand in an argument. Not really here to

1041
00:48:19,400 --> 00:48:22,080
Speaker 4: make judgments, but this is a really huge red flag

1042
00:48:22,120 --> 00:48:25,359
Speaker 4: that your wife is manipulative, and actually it's fiance. She's

1043
00:48:25,440 --> 00:48:27,799
Speaker 4: threatening you to throw away years of relationship over an

1044
00:48:27,920 --> 00:48:30,319
Speaker 4: argument and tries to guilt trip you into backing off.

1045
00:48:30,360 --> 00:48:31,240
Speaker 4: This can't be healthy.

1046
00:48:31,360 --> 00:48:31,720
Speaker 2: Agreed.

1047
00:48:32,480 --> 00:48:34,600
Speaker 4: I exitded something similar and broke up with me over

1048
00:48:34,640 --> 00:48:37,200
Speaker 4: one single argument, which makes me realize how damaging and

1049
00:48:37,200 --> 00:48:40,560
Speaker 4: toxic her behavior was. Edit. I read the update again

1050
00:48:40,600 --> 00:48:43,839
Speaker 4: and holy crap, it gets worse. I'm a professional. You aren't.

1051
00:48:44,160 --> 00:48:47,200
Speaker 4: You're a naffing idiot. Your wife is egotistical, weigh in

1052
00:48:47,200 --> 00:48:50,279
Speaker 4: her head, and is definitely on a power trip. This

1053
00:48:50,360 --> 00:48:52,400
Speaker 4: wife of yours doesn't care what you think and is

1054
00:48:52,480 --> 00:48:55,760
Speaker 4: openly attacking and disrespecting not only you but also your uncle.

1055
00:48:55,840 --> 00:48:58,319
Speaker 4: And the business that you have to call you not

1056
00:48:58,480 --> 00:49:01,719
Speaker 4: a professional is laughable. You will become a doormat and

1057
00:49:01,800 --> 00:49:03,719
Speaker 4: let her walk all over you. If you don't do

1058
00:49:03,800 --> 00:49:06,600
Speaker 4: something about it, you are definitely not the ale. You

1059
00:49:06,640 --> 00:49:09,879
Speaker 4: may be blunt, but your argument is well founded. Comment too,

1060
00:49:10,480 --> 00:49:15,440
Speaker 4: you're the ahle before everyone sucks here, absolutely, But now

1061
00:49:15,600 --> 00:49:17,239
Speaker 4: you don't know that she's slept with them. He could

1062
00:49:17,280 --> 00:49:21,360
Speaker 4: have hurt her, or any number of things could have happened,

1063
00:49:21,360 --> 00:49:23,120
Speaker 4: and just assuming she's slept with him makes you the

1064
00:49:23,160 --> 00:49:25,799
Speaker 4: ahle in a big way. Also demanding she not go

1065
00:49:25,920 --> 00:49:28,360
Speaker 4: back to her job. That's quite a butt move too.

1066
00:49:28,520 --> 00:49:31,239
Speaker 4: Just quitting a job without notice kind of major consequences.

1067
00:49:31,280 --> 00:49:32,759
Speaker 4: And if that guy is willing to sleep with his

1068
00:49:32,800 --> 00:49:36,200
Speaker 4: subordinates in that manner, you better believe he's capable and

1069
00:49:36,239 --> 00:49:38,880
Speaker 4: probably willing to ruin their lives if they try to

1070
00:49:38,880 --> 00:49:41,440
Speaker 4: say anything. I doubt this is the first time he's

1071
00:49:41,480 --> 00:49:44,840
Speaker 4: done this. Instead of demanding she quit, maybe you should

1072
00:49:44,840 --> 00:49:46,880
Speaker 4: have talked to her and asked her if she felt safe,

1073
00:49:47,239 --> 00:49:50,040
Speaker 4: made a plan if you tried to retaliate. I know

1074
00:49:50,080 --> 00:49:52,440
Speaker 4: she was mad at you, rightfully so, but think how

1075
00:49:52,480 --> 00:49:55,080
Speaker 4: it felt to be her thinking she was getting rewarded

1076
00:49:55,120 --> 00:49:57,680
Speaker 4: for a job well done and then getting harassed, because

1077
00:49:57,719 --> 00:49:59,080
Speaker 4: that is exactly what that dinner was.

1078
00:49:59,120 --> 00:50:02,680
Speaker 1: Well, I feel like that comment ignores her entire personality

1079
00:50:02,680 --> 00:50:04,719
Speaker 1: in the way that she's been interacting with OP.

1080
00:50:05,000 --> 00:50:07,480
Speaker 4: I think I think that there is there's truth in

1081
00:50:08,120 --> 00:50:10,880
Speaker 4: many elements of these comments. But I think that to

1082
00:50:11,320 --> 00:50:13,360
Speaker 4: say one way or the other that OP is an

1083
00:50:13,360 --> 00:50:16,400
Speaker 4: a hole or she's an a hole is to disregard

1084
00:50:16,520 --> 00:50:18,120
Speaker 4: the entirety of the story.

1085
00:50:18,200 --> 00:50:20,520
Speaker 2: My hypothesis would be like, if he does go to

1086
00:50:20,560 --> 00:50:22,920
Speaker 2: her and is like, I'm one, I'm looking out, I'm

1087
00:50:22,960 --> 00:50:24,040
Speaker 2: caring for you, I'm doing.

1088
00:50:23,840 --> 00:50:26,239
Speaker 1: That, she'd be like you gross, you're weak man, or

1089
00:50:26,320 --> 00:50:28,120
Speaker 1: like and also stop trying to control me.

1090
00:50:28,120 --> 00:50:30,920
Speaker 2: I'm fine. Yeah, Yeah, that's probably how she'd been.

1091
00:50:30,960 --> 00:50:33,399
Speaker 4: O P says I never once demanded that she quit.

1092
00:50:33,840 --> 00:50:35,719
Speaker 4: I said, I was incredulous that she was going back

1093
00:50:35,719 --> 00:50:37,439
Speaker 4: to a job where the owner of the company pulled

1094
00:50:37,440 --> 00:50:39,400
Speaker 4: a month long con on her that resulted in him

1095
00:50:39,440 --> 00:50:42,279
Speaker 4: saying openly that he wanted effort. She is supposed to

1096
00:50:42,320 --> 00:50:44,600
Speaker 4: be the hr professional that people can come talk to

1097
00:50:44,719 --> 00:50:48,680
Speaker 4: when something like this happens. Now, by tacitly going along

1098
00:50:48,760 --> 00:50:51,640
Speaker 4: with it and not even calling him out, her professional

1099
00:50:51,640 --> 00:50:54,600
Speaker 4: integrity is forever compromised. As long as she stays at

1100
00:50:54,600 --> 00:50:58,080
Speaker 4: this law firm. She can't be trusted, she can't confront him,

1101
00:50:58,200 --> 00:51:00,520
Speaker 4: she can't be the ethical voice of re and against

1102
00:51:00,520 --> 00:51:03,760
Speaker 4: someone we know is a sleezebag. He forever has dirt

1103
00:51:03,800 --> 00:51:06,359
Speaker 4: on her. Even with that, I didn't demand she quit

1104
00:51:06,360 --> 00:51:09,600
Speaker 4: her job. And that is the end of that story.

1105
00:51:10,080 --> 00:51:12,200
Speaker 4: I think that was just a complicated story all around.

1106
00:51:12,239 --> 00:51:13,439
Speaker 4: But at the end of the day, I just don't

1107
00:51:13,440 --> 00:51:16,239
Speaker 4: know if you guys are right for each other.

1108
00:51:16,280 --> 00:51:16,719
Speaker 2: Really not.

1109
00:51:17,040 --> 00:51:20,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, you should be with a girl who likes cars,

1110
00:51:20,200 --> 00:51:23,239
Speaker 1: not a lawyer. Get get with a yeah, get with

1111
00:51:23,280 --> 00:51:25,879
Speaker 1: a mechanic chick. Well that's the lesson here is, don't

1112
00:51:25,880 --> 00:51:26,400
Speaker 1: be a lawyer.

1113
00:51:28,080 --> 00:51:30,520
Speaker 2: John here og host. We're gonna get back to these stories.

1114
00:51:30,560 --> 00:51:33,080
Speaker 2: But a quick three minute break from hops from our sponsors.

1115
00:51:33,400 --> 00:51:35,680
Speaker 2: My friend became obsessed with me.

1116
00:51:36,680 --> 00:51:40,200
Speaker 1: I had to cut our connection, get her out her.

1117
00:51:41,200 --> 00:51:44,400
Speaker 1: In twenty fourteen, I was a single and or ready

1118
00:51:44,480 --> 00:51:48,440
Speaker 1: to mangle, and my friends suggested dating apps. I signed

1119
00:51:48,520 --> 00:51:51,600
Speaker 1: up for one plenty of fish, and my goodness, the

1120
00:51:51,640 --> 00:51:55,120
Speaker 1: weirdos are there. One guy asked if he could just

1121
00:51:55,239 --> 00:51:58,200
Speaker 1: come and lick my toilet, while another collected sockfluff. Oh

1122
00:51:58,239 --> 00:52:00,560
Speaker 1: my god, h what on earth had I got myself

1123
00:52:00,560 --> 00:52:01,600
Speaker 1: into ew Hugh.

1124
00:52:01,840 --> 00:52:02,040
Speaker 3: Oh.

1125
00:52:02,160 --> 00:52:04,759
Speaker 1: By the way, this comes from user Loki of Asgard

1126
00:52:04,760 --> 00:52:06,160
Speaker 1: eighty four and if you want to submit your own

1127
00:52:06,200 --> 00:52:10,080
Speaker 1: stories to the r slash okay story time subreddit. I

1128
00:52:10,160 --> 00:52:13,600
Speaker 1: met a guy, Dave, who seemed like the only normal

1129
00:52:13,640 --> 00:52:15,880
Speaker 1: person on the app, and we started chatting a lot.

1130
00:52:16,120 --> 00:52:19,680
Speaker 1: We became friends. We liked the same things and exchanged numbers.

1131
00:52:20,000 --> 00:52:24,880
Speaker 1: We chatted every day. Nothing creepy, just good friends. I

1132
00:52:24,880 --> 00:52:28,520
Speaker 1: didn't get any weird vibes or red flags. Eventually we

1133
00:52:28,560 --> 00:52:31,560
Speaker 1: decided to meet and went to the cinema local to me.

1134
00:52:32,200 --> 00:52:33,839
Speaker 1: It was clear for both of us that we would

1135
00:52:33,880 --> 00:52:37,280
Speaker 1: just be friends. There was no attraction on either part.

1136
00:52:37,840 --> 00:52:40,359
Speaker 1: I worked from home as a hairdresser, and we would

1137
00:52:40,400 --> 00:52:44,319
Speaker 1: chat in between clients. We would attend parties together when

1138
00:52:44,320 --> 00:52:47,440
Speaker 1: my children were with their father. We only made plans

1139
00:52:47,440 --> 00:52:50,719
Speaker 1: when my children weren't home, and never during the week.

1140
00:52:51,480 --> 00:52:53,919
Speaker 1: I met his friends and he met mine. I met

1141
00:52:53,960 --> 00:52:57,040
Speaker 1: his mom and dad, etc. If we went out for lunch.

1142
00:52:56,840 --> 00:52:58,960
Speaker 2: We either agreed to pay half or I'd pay this

1143
00:52:59,040 --> 00:52:59,960
Speaker 2: time and he would pay the next.

1144
00:53:00,840 --> 00:53:03,680
Speaker 1: You're dating this guy, this is a day You're day

1145
00:53:03,760 --> 00:53:07,600
Speaker 1: you're describing dating this guy? Any day trips they were

1146
00:53:07,640 --> 00:53:10,200
Speaker 1: taking day trips. He would cover his part and I'd

1147
00:53:10,239 --> 00:53:14,600
Speaker 1: cover mine. So and that that sounds like dating. Yeah,

1148
00:53:14,760 --> 00:53:16,680
Speaker 1: that sounds like dating. I just needed to make sure

1149
00:53:16,680 --> 00:53:20,480
Speaker 1: I wasn't off points. Sounds like dating and a little dating.

1150
00:53:20,880 --> 00:53:23,759
Speaker 1: On alternate weekends, when my children were with their dad,

1151
00:53:23,960 --> 00:53:26,759
Speaker 1: he would stay over no funny business and be gone

1152
00:53:26,800 --> 00:53:30,920
Speaker 1: before they got home. Months into our friendship, things took

1153
00:53:30,960 --> 00:53:34,520
Speaker 1: a turn. We had already decided that we would only

1154
00:53:34,560 --> 00:53:36,799
Speaker 1: be friends and that we would both be supportive of

1155
00:53:36,800 --> 00:53:39,360
Speaker 1: each other. When we found a partner, we agreed we

1156
00:53:39,400 --> 00:53:42,560
Speaker 1: would always be friends. I had met someone and was

1157
00:53:42,600 --> 00:53:45,400
Speaker 1: eager to share the news with my friend. He was

1158
00:53:45,560 --> 00:53:49,319
Speaker 1: far from happy about it. His demeanor completely changed. He

1159
00:53:49,360 --> 00:53:51,600
Speaker 1: started not going to work, claiming to be sick, but

1160
00:53:51,640 --> 00:53:54,680
Speaker 1: would turn up at mine after the morning's school run

1161
00:53:54,920 --> 00:53:57,719
Speaker 1: and stay most of the day until school pickup. It

1162
00:53:57,800 --> 00:54:00,360
Speaker 1: was awkward for my clients, and he would be in

1163
00:54:00,360 --> 00:54:02,839
Speaker 1: the front room so I could work. I didn't mind

1164
00:54:02,840 --> 00:54:05,000
Speaker 1: at first, but it quickly became stressful and I started

1165
00:54:05,000 --> 00:54:09,799
Speaker 1: to feel suffocated. He also started staying longer even when

1166
00:54:09,800 --> 00:54:12,560
Speaker 1: my children were home from school. They liked him, so

1167
00:54:12,600 --> 00:54:14,319
Speaker 1: I thought it wouldn't be a problem for them to

1168
00:54:14,320 --> 00:54:17,520
Speaker 1: meet my friend. However, he began staying late into the

1169
00:54:17,520 --> 00:54:20,200
Speaker 1: weekday evenings and I felt it was impacting my time

1170
00:54:20,239 --> 00:54:23,120
Speaker 1: with my children, so I very nicely suggested a bit

1171
00:54:23,120 --> 00:54:26,160
Speaker 1: of space and keeping our hangouts to the weekends. He

1172
00:54:26,280 --> 00:54:28,879
Speaker 1: was fine with that. I mean, everything that has been

1173
00:54:28,920 --> 00:54:33,279
Speaker 1: listed could definitely be platonic. Yeah, but also if it's not,

1174
00:54:33,440 --> 00:54:37,160
Speaker 1: like made extremely clear that it's all platonic, it could

1175
00:54:37,239 --> 00:54:39,680
Speaker 1: be very easy to confuse this with being like, am

1176
00:54:39,760 --> 00:54:40,560
Speaker 1: I developing well?

1177
00:54:40,560 --> 00:54:42,880
Speaker 4: But the thing is that they did. They were like friends.

1178
00:54:42,960 --> 00:54:45,200
Speaker 4: We're friends, right, We're gonna be always friends.

1179
00:54:45,719 --> 00:54:47,759
Speaker 1: Yeah, but it's like we're gonna be friends forever. It's like,

1180
00:54:47,760 --> 00:54:50,239
Speaker 1: but you've only only known this person for a couple

1181
00:54:50,239 --> 00:54:54,080
Speaker 1: of months. After chatting with my girlfriends about the situation,

1182
00:54:54,160 --> 00:54:56,200
Speaker 1: they suggested he might have a crush on me.

1183
00:54:56,719 --> 00:55:00,800
Speaker 2: I laughed it off. There was no way.

1184
00:55:00,480 --> 00:55:03,760
Speaker 1: We didn't think of each other like that. My girlfriends,

1185
00:55:04,880 --> 00:55:08,600
Speaker 1: A and K our family and made sure we would

1186
00:55:08,600 --> 00:55:11,040
Speaker 1: spend at least one night a month having a catch

1187
00:55:11,120 --> 00:55:14,560
Speaker 1: up at my place with movies and nibbles when the kids.

1188
00:55:14,360 --> 00:55:14,920
Speaker 2: Were in bed.

1189
00:55:15,560 --> 00:55:19,400
Speaker 1: No men were allowed. But he started to be But

1190
00:55:19,480 --> 00:55:23,360
Speaker 1: he started turning up on these girls' nights, which raised

1191
00:55:23,360 --> 00:55:26,880
Speaker 1: eyebrows and red flags. They thought he was nice, but

1192
00:55:27,000 --> 00:55:30,319
Speaker 1: a bit odd. One particular weekend, I had planned to

1193
00:55:30,360 --> 00:55:33,600
Speaker 1: spend it with my friend Ka and had not made

1194
00:55:33,600 --> 00:55:36,600
Speaker 1: plans with Dave. He was fully aware of my plans

1195
00:55:36,640 --> 00:55:38,520
Speaker 1: and had made his own elsewhere.

1196
00:55:38,920 --> 00:55:40,040
Speaker 2: My children weren't.

1197
00:55:39,760 --> 00:55:42,879
Speaker 1: Home, so we bought copious amounts of wine and sat

1198
00:55:42,920 --> 00:55:46,400
Speaker 1: around my fire pit, letting all hair down. She was

1199
00:55:46,400 --> 00:55:49,440
Speaker 1: staying over and it was a great night. Around midnight,

1200
00:55:49,480 --> 00:55:51,719
Speaker 1: we were still having a little drinking poo and I

1201
00:55:51,760 --> 00:55:54,799
Speaker 1: got a text from Dave asking if he could come over.

1202
00:55:55,280 --> 00:55:58,560
Speaker 1: I suggested that he didn't, as I had my plans.

1203
00:56:00,120 --> 00:56:03,320
Speaker 1: Next morning, I came downstairs to see k equally hungover,

1204
00:56:03,600 --> 00:56:05,800
Speaker 1: sitting on the sofa with a shocked look on her face.

1205
00:56:06,120 --> 00:56:08,160
Speaker 1: Turns out she got up early for water and went

1206
00:56:08,200 --> 00:56:10,400
Speaker 1: into the kitchen to find Dave sitting at my dining

1207
00:56:10,440 --> 00:56:11,400
Speaker 1: table on his phone.

1208
00:56:11,640 --> 00:56:14,640
Speaker 2: Oh, just a casual b and E. He's just gonna

1209
00:56:14,680 --> 00:56:17,240
Speaker 2: casually be and e into your dining room. Okay.

1210
00:56:17,239 --> 00:56:19,040
Speaker 1: So there was a spare key to my house in

1211
00:56:19,080 --> 00:56:21,960
Speaker 1: a key fob outside, and he did know the code

1212
00:56:22,000 --> 00:56:24,600
Speaker 1: but had never used it before. I wasn't thrilled to

1213
00:56:24,600 --> 00:56:27,920
Speaker 1: say the least. He brushed it off, bro, saying I

1214
00:56:28,040 --> 00:56:30,600
Speaker 1: wasn't thrilled to say the least to a guy, just

1215
00:56:30,640 --> 00:56:32,600
Speaker 1: like being in your house in the morning is like

1216
00:56:32,960 --> 00:56:36,239
Speaker 1: way underreacting like you should have immediately been like.

1217
00:56:36,400 --> 00:56:40,640
Speaker 2: Get out of my house. I told, what are you doing? Sorry?

1218
00:56:40,760 --> 00:56:42,759
Speaker 1: Uh? He brushed off, saying he knew he would be

1219
00:56:42,840 --> 00:56:45,200
Speaker 1: hungover and was going to fix us breakfast. At this

1220
00:56:45,320 --> 00:56:48,640
Speaker 1: point I asked for space. I started to distance myself

1221
00:56:48,640 --> 00:56:51,360
Speaker 1: from him and not make myself readily available for catchups.

1222
00:56:51,800 --> 00:56:53,759
Speaker 1: After some time in space, we decided to meet up

1223
00:56:53,800 --> 00:56:56,960
Speaker 1: at his friend's engagement party. The gathering was fine and

1224
00:56:57,000 --> 00:56:59,880
Speaker 1: there were a lot of people to mingle with until

1225
00:57:00,160 --> 00:57:02,719
Speaker 1: soon to be groom approached me, thanking me for giving

1226
00:57:02,800 --> 00:57:05,960
Speaker 1: Dave another chance. He said, Dave had been really upset

1227
00:57:05,960 --> 00:57:09,799
Speaker 1: the last few weeks when we split up. So yeah,

1228
00:57:09,880 --> 00:57:14,400
Speaker 1: everyone thought they were dating, including Dave. And it's like, girl,

1229
00:57:14,600 --> 00:57:16,320
Speaker 1: the way you described it, I thought you were dating

1230
00:57:16,480 --> 00:57:17,800
Speaker 1: and you met him on a dating app.

1231
00:57:17,840 --> 00:57:21,760
Speaker 4: But also but they said friends. They were like we're

1232
00:57:21,800 --> 00:57:22,240
Speaker 4: friends that.

1233
00:57:23,280 --> 00:57:25,920
Speaker 1: However, this goes back into the last story with like

1234
00:57:26,160 --> 00:57:30,040
Speaker 1: the naivety you meet a guy on a dating app,

1235
00:57:30,400 --> 00:57:32,960
Speaker 1: and then you're like, oh, someone said that we were

1236
00:57:33,000 --> 00:57:33,560
Speaker 1: just friends.

1237
00:57:33,600 --> 00:57:35,640
Speaker 4: That was a different person, but like, yeah.

1238
00:57:35,560 --> 00:57:38,000
Speaker 1: No, that was the same guy. She met this Dave

1239
00:57:38,120 --> 00:57:41,560
Speaker 1: guy on the dating app. But then it's like when

1240
00:57:41,560 --> 00:57:43,320
Speaker 1: they hung out, it was like, oh, we'll just be friends,

1241
00:57:43,320 --> 00:57:43,800
Speaker 1: but it's like.

1242
00:57:45,720 --> 00:57:48,439
Speaker 2: On the dating app. Yeah, and I get it.

1243
00:57:48,440 --> 00:57:51,480
Speaker 1: It's clearly he was being duplicitus or there wasn't enough communication,

1244
00:57:51,560 --> 00:57:52,200
Speaker 1: whatever it is.

1245
00:57:52,280 --> 00:57:54,240
Speaker 2: It's not like all on op or anything.

1246
00:57:54,320 --> 00:57:58,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, but it's like little naive not seeing how maybe

1247
00:57:58,880 --> 00:58:02,040
Speaker 1: this guy could have totally had his signals crossed on you.

1248
00:58:02,280 --> 00:58:05,080
Speaker 1: I question what he was on about, and he said

1249
00:58:05,120 --> 00:58:07,560
Speaker 1: that he was made to believe by Dave that we

1250
00:58:07,560 --> 00:58:10,480
Speaker 1: were a couple and had a lover's tiff and split up.

1251
00:58:11,160 --> 00:58:13,840
Speaker 1: I explained that was never the case and that there

1252
00:58:13,920 --> 00:58:17,400
Speaker 1: was no romantic involvement at all. Dave looked very sheepish,

1253
00:58:17,440 --> 00:58:20,040
Speaker 1: like he had been caught. I decided it was time

1254
00:58:20,080 --> 00:58:22,280
Speaker 1: for me to make an exit. Dave knew I had

1255
00:58:22,320 --> 00:58:24,440
Speaker 1: met someone and was getting to know him. Rumors like

1256
00:58:24,480 --> 00:58:27,840
Speaker 1: this could lead to disaster. I didn't answer his calls

1257
00:58:27,880 --> 00:58:30,080
Speaker 1: or text for the week after this incident. I had

1258
00:58:30,120 --> 00:58:32,360
Speaker 1: explained at the party how I felt about him telling

1259
00:58:32,400 --> 00:58:33,920
Speaker 1: lies to others about our friendship.

1260
00:58:34,240 --> 00:58:34,960
Speaker 4: He had a lot of.

1261
00:58:34,920 --> 00:58:37,480
Speaker 1: Explaining to do with the groom about why he lied

1262
00:58:37,560 --> 00:58:40,400
Speaker 1: after being confronted. Then I got a random text from

1263
00:58:40,440 --> 00:58:42,760
Speaker 1: Dave saying he was being rushed to the hospital for

1264
00:58:42,800 --> 00:58:46,080
Speaker 1: emergency surgery and asked if I would come. I couldn't

1265
00:58:46,120 --> 00:58:47,880
Speaker 1: as I was working and would be picking up the

1266
00:58:47,960 --> 00:58:50,320
Speaker 1: kids soon from school. I wished him the best and

1267
00:58:50,360 --> 00:58:52,480
Speaker 1: told him to let me know when he recovered. I

1268
00:58:52,520 --> 00:58:54,160
Speaker 1: heard nothing until the end of the week, when he

1269
00:58:54,200 --> 00:58:57,320
Speaker 1: asked if I could pop in. On the weekend, I

1270
00:58:57,360 --> 00:58:59,600
Speaker 1: had the kids home, but thought I should go to

1271
00:58:59,640 --> 00:59:02,680
Speaker 1: make sure he was okay, then head out shopping with them.

1272
00:59:03,000 --> 00:59:05,240
Speaker 1: We took a train for forty five minutes. As we

1273
00:59:05,280 --> 00:59:09,800
Speaker 1: got off the train, he was right there. Confusion set

1274
00:59:09,800 --> 00:59:11,960
Speaker 1: in as he had just had major surgery and was

1275
00:59:11,960 --> 00:59:15,000
Speaker 1: supposedly in dire straits. Anyway, he wanted to drive us

1276
00:59:15,000 --> 00:59:17,240
Speaker 1: to his place rather than take a taxi. I got

1277
00:59:17,280 --> 00:59:19,320
Speaker 1: to his mom's, who is lovely, and had a cup

1278
00:59:19,360 --> 00:59:21,640
Speaker 1: of tea and a ketchup. A nurse arrived to do

1279
00:59:21,680 --> 00:59:23,360
Speaker 1: a dressing change, so the kids and I stayed in

1280
00:59:23,440 --> 00:59:25,840
Speaker 1: the kitchen while his mom was with him in the

1281
00:59:25,840 --> 00:59:29,000
Speaker 1: front room. Time ticked on and the nurse left. No

1282
00:59:29,080 --> 00:59:31,440
Speaker 1: one came out of the front room. I knocked to

1283
00:59:31,440 --> 00:59:31,960
Speaker 1: see if it.

1284
00:59:31,920 --> 00:59:33,640
Speaker 2: Was safe to come in, and the shock of what

1285
00:59:33,720 --> 00:59:35,479
Speaker 2: I saw has stayed with me to this day.

1286
00:59:36,200 --> 00:59:41,080
Speaker 1: He was being spoon fed food by his mother, who

1287
00:59:41,160 --> 00:59:43,200
Speaker 1: was wiping his mouth like a helpless baby.

1288
00:59:43,240 --> 00:59:46,280
Speaker 2: What but like to do his r arms not working?

1289
00:59:46,360 --> 00:59:47,280
Speaker 4: Yeah, what's wrong with them?

1290
00:59:47,960 --> 00:59:50,400
Speaker 2: Because he drove them if he couldn't just if he

1291
00:59:50,440 --> 00:59:51,160
Speaker 2: can't feed.

1292
00:59:51,040 --> 00:59:54,320
Speaker 1: Himself, that's one thing. But like, I don't know, let's

1293
00:59:54,320 --> 00:59:57,680
Speaker 1: get back into it. It was cringe worthy, a thirty

1294
00:59:57,680 --> 01:00:00,440
Speaker 1: something year old man being spoon and fed for simple

1295
01:00:00,520 --> 01:00:04,360
Speaker 1: boil removal from his butt cheek. Oh so not only

1296
01:00:05,080 --> 01:00:07,960
Speaker 1: he lied and said that it was emergency surgery.

1297
01:00:08,040 --> 01:00:10,120
Speaker 3: You might like, oh, like the pass away.

1298
01:00:10,160 --> 01:00:14,240
Speaker 1: Oh, then you're gonna get the phone coils, You're gonna

1299
01:00:14,240 --> 01:00:17,160
Speaker 1: get the text message where it's like, this is his mom,

1300
01:00:17,240 --> 01:00:20,000
Speaker 1: Like he just wanted us. He just wanted you to

1301
01:00:20,080 --> 01:00:23,160
Speaker 1: know that on as is his last breath, he said

1302
01:00:23,240 --> 01:00:25,600
Speaker 1: he loved you and like wanted to know if you

1303
01:00:25,640 --> 01:00:28,280
Speaker 1: loved him back. So it was not a major surgery

1304
01:00:28,400 --> 01:00:31,520
Speaker 1: or a life or situation. It was just a butt

1305
01:00:31,640 --> 01:00:32,440
Speaker 1: cheek boil.

1306
01:00:32,720 --> 01:00:32,840
Speaker 4: Oh.

1307
01:00:33,280 --> 01:00:35,720
Speaker 1: They both acted like this was normal. I made my

1308
01:00:35,800 --> 01:00:36,880
Speaker 1: excuses and left.

1309
01:00:36,880 --> 01:00:38,800
Speaker 2: You should have made any excuses. You should have been like,

1310
01:00:38,800 --> 01:00:41,360
Speaker 2: this is absurd. You lied to me, you broke into

1311
01:00:41,360 --> 01:00:44,600
Speaker 2: my house, You're creepy. Don't come near me or my

1312
01:00:44,720 --> 01:00:45,640
Speaker 2: kids ever. Again.

1313
01:00:46,120 --> 01:00:51,480
Speaker 1: Red flags were now in full view. Uh, and I

1314
01:00:51,520 --> 01:00:55,360
Speaker 1: had to act. The constant lies and weird behavior outweighed

1315
01:00:55,400 --> 01:00:58,120
Speaker 1: the good friendship. I thought I had Things were happening

1316
01:00:58,120 --> 01:01:00,400
Speaker 1: with the new guy, and I didn't want Dave any

1317
01:01:00,400 --> 01:01:03,000
Speaker 1: issue with that. So I told him that things were

1318
01:01:03,000 --> 01:01:04,880
Speaker 1: getting serious with the new guy and I wanted to

1319
01:01:04,920 --> 01:01:07,040
Speaker 1: explore it. I still wanted him in my life as

1320
01:01:07,080 --> 01:01:09,160
Speaker 1: a friend, but I was excited to start a relationship.

1321
01:01:09,200 --> 01:01:10,400
Speaker 2: Girl, No, you don't.

1322
01:01:10,520 --> 01:01:12,640
Speaker 3: Why dude, you want this guy in your life?

1323
01:01:12,800 --> 01:01:16,000
Speaker 4: Yes? Get him out. Yeah, he's been weird. It's a

1324
01:01:16,000 --> 01:01:18,520
Speaker 4: weird guy. He's over not listening to your boundaries.

1325
01:01:18,600 --> 01:01:21,840
Speaker 1: He threw the tantrum of tantrums like a child. Go

1326
01:01:21,880 --> 01:01:24,280
Speaker 1: figure the guy getting spoon fed by his mom's thrown

1327
01:01:24,320 --> 01:01:27,720
Speaker 1: temper tantrums. I was instantly blocked and removed from all

1328
01:01:27,720 --> 01:01:30,560
Speaker 1: social media I received a texting have a good life,

1329
01:01:31,000 --> 01:01:35,120
Speaker 1: and that was that or so I thought, no, wo

1330
01:01:36,120 --> 01:01:38,720
Speaker 1: And you know what's never just that because we're constantly

1331
01:01:38,760 --> 01:01:40,520
Speaker 1: adding more and more episodes.

1332
01:01:40,720 --> 01:01:43,560
Speaker 2: Is is listening to full episodes with stories like this.

1333
01:01:44,600 --> 01:01:44,720
Speaker 1: Uh.

1334
01:01:44,880 --> 01:01:48,320
Speaker 2: Go to Spotify or iHeartRadio or Apple podcasts. Wherever you

1335
01:01:48,320 --> 01:01:50,480
Speaker 2: listen to podcasts, search okay, story time, and you will.

1336
01:01:50,400 --> 01:01:54,360
Speaker 1: Always have a new, unlimited supply of stories because we're

1337
01:01:54,360 --> 01:01:55,320
Speaker 1: constantly adding more.

1338
01:01:55,360 --> 01:01:56,800
Speaker 2: Every day, every.

1339
01:01:56,640 --> 01:01:59,920
Speaker 1: Single day, we're adding more. So I challenge you to

1340
01:02:00,840 --> 01:02:02,760
Speaker 1: there is a little bit more story left. I think

1341
01:02:02,800 --> 01:02:03,520
Speaker 1: we're on agreement.

1342
01:02:03,640 --> 01:02:06,439
Speaker 2: Yeah, force stop playcating this man.

1343
01:02:06,800 --> 01:02:09,400
Speaker 4: He's a little weirdo. You've told them multiple times, regardless

1344
01:02:09,440 --> 01:02:11,160
Speaker 4: of like however you've been acting. You told the multiple

1345
01:02:11,160 --> 01:02:13,240
Speaker 4: times that you only want to be friends. He's telling

1346
01:02:13,280 --> 01:02:17,240
Speaker 4: people that you're dating, which again, it'd be different if

1347
01:02:17,360 --> 01:02:19,200
Speaker 4: he was like telling people that, oh, she's leading me

1348
01:02:19,240 --> 01:02:21,280
Speaker 4: on because we're all doing all these daity things. No,

1349
01:02:21,320 --> 01:02:23,800
Speaker 4: he's telling people that you're literally dating even though you

1350
01:02:23,800 --> 01:02:26,600
Speaker 4: have established other friends. And he's getting spoon fed by

1351
01:02:26,600 --> 01:02:29,439
Speaker 4: his mom. He's breaking your house. Got it off.

1352
01:02:29,760 --> 01:02:32,680
Speaker 1: I felt bad that I had lost a friend so easily,

1353
01:02:32,720 --> 01:02:35,280
Speaker 1: but he was constantly lying. I later found out he

1354
01:02:35,360 --> 01:02:38,400
Speaker 1: set up a Facebook page dedicated to mistreated men and

1355
01:02:38,480 --> 01:02:40,680
Speaker 1: mentioned that I was his, ex claiming I gave him

1356
01:02:40,720 --> 01:02:44,320
Speaker 1: PTSD and trauma. He later removed it after his friends

1357
01:02:44,400 --> 01:02:47,760
Speaker 1: posted to that page that it was all fabricated. Now

1358
01:02:47,800 --> 01:02:50,520
Speaker 1: I'm married to the new guy, wow, and life is great.

1359
01:02:50,920 --> 01:02:53,120
Speaker 1: All I know of Dave is that he's an online gamer,

1360
01:02:53,200 --> 01:02:55,960
Speaker 1: has gained significant weight, and has two kids. I wish

1361
01:02:56,040 --> 01:02:59,360
Speaker 1: him all the best and Sapie, but likest.

1362
01:02:59,360 --> 01:03:01,320
Speaker 2: Stop pushing the best. You don't need to do that.

1363
01:03:01,320 --> 01:03:02,720
Speaker 2: That's the end of that story.