1 00:00:01,600 --> 00:00:05,840 Speaker 1: Before we begin this week's episode, please make sure to 2 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:09,760 Speaker 1: leave a five star review on Apple podcast. You can 3 00:00:09,760 --> 00:00:12,400 Speaker 1: only do this if you're listening to this on an iPhone, 4 00:00:12,640 --> 00:00:15,800 Speaker 1: so please make sure to rate, review and subscribe on 5 00:00:15,960 --> 00:00:19,840 Speaker 1: Apple Podcasts. Please five star reviews only. Hold me Down, 6 00:00:19,920 --> 00:00:22,680 Speaker 1: Don't Hold me Up. Merch is now available on this 7 00:00:22,800 --> 00:00:25,079 Speaker 1: site as well as my book list, so please visit 8 00:00:25,120 --> 00:00:28,120 Speaker 1: the link in the show notes below. If you would 9 00:00:28,120 --> 00:00:31,640 Speaker 1: like to support the PhD Podcast, please sign up at 10 00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:37,440 Speaker 1: www dot patreon dot com. Forward slash the PhD Podcast. 11 00:00:38,159 --> 00:00:40,440 Speaker 1: Thank you all so much for holding the kid down, 12 00:00:40,800 --> 00:00:42,880 Speaker 1: and I really do hope that y'all enjoyed this week's 13 00:00:42,880 --> 00:00:48,120 Speaker 1: episode as much as I did. Later, Happy New Year, 14 00:00:48,200 --> 00:00:51,479 Speaker 1: Professional home girls. For those of you that do not know, 15 00:00:52,280 --> 00:00:56,880 Speaker 1: today is my one year anniversary for starting the PhD 16 00:00:56,960 --> 00:00:59,960 Speaker 1: Podcast and I am super excited and now I don't 17 00:01:00,120 --> 00:01:05,320 Speaker 1: honestly and truly say that the website is live. Please 18 00:01:05,319 --> 00:01:09,160 Speaker 1: show my website some love by business in www dot 19 00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:13,640 Speaker 1: t E p h G podcast dot com and tell 20 00:01:13,680 --> 00:01:16,440 Speaker 1: me what y'all think. Email me at hello at the 21 00:01:16,600 --> 00:01:19,600 Speaker 1: PhD podcast dot com. Show me some love, leave me 22 00:01:19,640 --> 00:01:22,080 Speaker 1: a five star review, tell me what the podcast is 23 00:01:22,120 --> 00:01:24,479 Speaker 1: done for you and me. It has definitely changed my life. 24 00:01:24,480 --> 00:01:26,520 Speaker 1: There's so many of your gems on here, and I 25 00:01:26,560 --> 00:01:29,440 Speaker 1: cannot wait to share with you all the new content 26 00:01:29,560 --> 00:01:31,840 Speaker 1: that I have in store for this year. So thank 27 00:01:31,880 --> 00:01:33,960 Speaker 1: you so much for rocking with me. Please make sure 28 00:01:34,040 --> 00:01:36,400 Speaker 1: to share this podcast with your friends, your families, your 29 00:01:36,440 --> 00:01:39,320 Speaker 1: loved ones, and niggas anybody out there that has a 30 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:41,839 Speaker 1: phone that listens to podcasts, because I really do believe 31 00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:44,560 Speaker 1: that the content that I am, I am providing it 32 00:01:44,560 --> 00:01:48,120 Speaker 1: will definitely help someone out there. So until next time, 33 00:01:48,360 --> 00:01:55,120 Speaker 1: enjoy this week's episode and later, welcome. You are now 34 00:01:55,200 --> 00:02:31,400 Speaker 1: listening to Hey everyone, welcome to this week's episode of 35 00:02:31,440 --> 00:02:34,040 Speaker 1: the PhD Podcast. Is Your Girl eban A and I 36 00:02:34,080 --> 00:02:37,639 Speaker 1: am super super excited about this week's episode. Before we begin, 37 00:02:37,720 --> 00:02:40,200 Speaker 1: let's do a little housekeeping. Please make sure to follow 38 00:02:40,200 --> 00:02:43,240 Speaker 1: me on Instagram at the Professional home Girl, at the 39 00:02:43,280 --> 00:02:46,320 Speaker 1: PhD Podcast, and last but not least, at eban a Beauty. 40 00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:49,720 Speaker 1: Please keep in mind that all of my guests are anonymous, 41 00:02:49,720 --> 00:02:52,840 Speaker 1: so let's beget in this week's episode. So, I am 42 00:02:52,880 --> 00:02:55,920 Speaker 1: super excited about this week's episode. I am interviewing the 43 00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:58,320 Speaker 1: author and she is anonymous. I was like make my 44 00:02:58,400 --> 00:03:01,960 Speaker 1: job a little bit more easier. She is a writer 45 00:03:02,040 --> 00:03:06,000 Speaker 1: of pussy prayers, sacred and sensual rituals for a wild 46 00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:09,160 Speaker 1: women of color. This book is amazing and I'm so 47 00:03:09,200 --> 00:03:11,160 Speaker 1: excited that I finally to get to have an interview 48 00:03:11,200 --> 00:03:12,800 Speaker 1: with you so we can talk about this, because there's 49 00:03:12,840 --> 00:03:19,600 Speaker 1: so much like stigma around the world pussy than yes. Yes. 50 00:03:20,080 --> 00:03:23,320 Speaker 1: So my first question, what made you write this book? 51 00:03:23,360 --> 00:03:29,520 Speaker 1: What was the inspiration behind it? Well, UM, I don't 52 00:03:29,560 --> 00:03:35,960 Speaker 1: know how woo woo is spiritual. Your audiences but were 53 00:03:36,080 --> 00:03:40,800 Speaker 1: very spiritual, all right, So I did not elect to 54 00:03:40,840 --> 00:03:45,240 Speaker 1: write this book. I actually UM got a I believe, 55 00:03:45,280 --> 00:03:49,560 Speaker 1: like a terrrot reading or something. And the issue was 56 00:03:49,640 --> 00:03:54,000 Speaker 1: that I was having problems at work, and I realized 57 00:03:54,040 --> 00:03:57,320 Speaker 1: that somehow I was always having problems at work, and 58 00:03:57,360 --> 00:03:59,840 Speaker 1: so I just wanted to understand, like, you know, and 59 00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:01,720 Speaker 1: I in the wrong place. What am I supposed to 60 00:04:01,720 --> 00:04:09,160 Speaker 1: be doing? UM? Just terrible terrible management leadership? UM. I 61 00:04:09,160 --> 00:04:13,040 Speaker 1: always felt like I was taking be taking advantage of UM. 62 00:04:13,120 --> 00:04:15,720 Speaker 1: I always felt like, you know, I was doing my 63 00:04:15,760 --> 00:04:17,640 Speaker 1: best and doing what I was supposed to do, but 64 00:04:17,800 --> 00:04:22,960 Speaker 1: still would be subject to UH consequences and bad evaluations. 65 00:04:23,000 --> 00:04:24,719 Speaker 1: And all these kinds of things, and so I just 66 00:04:24,800 --> 00:04:30,440 Speaker 1: didn't really understand what I was supposed to be doing. Um. 67 00:04:30,480 --> 00:04:33,800 Speaker 1: And when I got that terror reading, she was like, oh, 68 00:04:33,839 --> 00:04:37,320 Speaker 1: you're supposed to be writing books. And this was maybe 69 00:04:38,440 --> 00:04:45,279 Speaker 1: twenty sixteen, maybe early seventeen. So I'm like books, I 70 00:04:45,320 --> 00:04:48,240 Speaker 1: don't what am I writing about. I don't have anything 71 00:04:48,920 --> 00:04:51,840 Speaker 1: to discuss in a book, Like I've never considered that. 72 00:04:52,640 --> 00:04:55,560 Speaker 1: And she's like, well, your your ancestors are like you 73 00:04:55,600 --> 00:04:57,800 Speaker 1: need to be writing. You need to be writing this 74 00:04:57,839 --> 00:05:00,800 Speaker 1: book and that's gonna give you at everything you need 75 00:05:00,880 --> 00:05:05,080 Speaker 1: and you won't have to worry about no job. I mean, 76 00:05:05,120 --> 00:05:07,400 Speaker 1: I got about what four point five five stars on 77 00:05:07,520 --> 00:05:10,520 Speaker 1: every platform, so okay, we'll see. I didn't know that. 78 00:05:10,600 --> 00:05:14,640 Speaker 1: So I'm sitting there like book, Like, what are you 79 00:05:14,680 --> 00:05:18,200 Speaker 1: talking about? Like all about to write no book? I 80 00:05:18,240 --> 00:05:21,240 Speaker 1: don't know what y'all want for me, I whatever, So 81 00:05:21,320 --> 00:05:23,480 Speaker 1: of course I sit on it. I don't do anything 82 00:05:23,760 --> 00:05:28,640 Speaker 1: with it. Um. But I read something and it said 83 00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:32,680 Speaker 1: I think it was a poem or an article, but 84 00:05:32,800 --> 00:05:37,599 Speaker 1: it says something about like, uh, prayers to the almighty 85 00:05:37,640 --> 00:05:41,000 Speaker 1: pussy or something like that, and I was like, huh, 86 00:05:41,839 --> 00:05:46,360 Speaker 1: pussy prayers that sounds. I wrote down you know the name, 87 00:05:46,480 --> 00:05:49,920 Speaker 1: and I didn't do anything else with it. Um. Of course, 88 00:05:49,960 --> 00:05:53,719 Speaker 1: I continue to be hardheaded, and I didn't write this book. 89 00:05:54,360 --> 00:05:57,760 Speaker 1: It's well into I have not written this book, and 90 00:05:57,800 --> 00:05:59,880 Speaker 1: I'm still like at this point, I can't even find 91 00:05:59,880 --> 00:06:02,440 Speaker 1: a job, and I'm just like, what is going on? 92 00:06:02,800 --> 00:06:05,159 Speaker 1: Like I need to eat, I need to pay my bills, 93 00:06:05,240 --> 00:06:09,480 Speaker 1: Like what is wrong in this same like uh so 94 00:06:09,640 --> 00:06:12,680 Speaker 1: that look, that book is how you gonna eat? And 95 00:06:12,680 --> 00:06:16,719 Speaker 1: I'm just like, you know, like stop like it, stop 96 00:06:16,760 --> 00:06:20,480 Speaker 1: playing with me. I'm not doing this book. But I 97 00:06:21,520 --> 00:06:25,800 Speaker 1: guess got to rock bottom round about October and I 98 00:06:25,839 --> 00:06:29,040 Speaker 1: was like, you know what, it can't hurt, let's just 99 00:06:29,120 --> 00:06:33,200 Speaker 1: do it. And so um, I wrote one version of 100 00:06:33,279 --> 00:06:37,520 Speaker 1: it and it was okay, um around maybe August of September, 101 00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:42,080 Speaker 1: and I just knew that I needed to put in 102 00:06:43,720 --> 00:06:47,560 Speaker 1: I guess my own story, um and just different things 103 00:06:47,600 --> 00:06:51,640 Speaker 1: that I experienced and learned over the years. And around 104 00:06:51,680 --> 00:06:55,960 Speaker 1: October I kind of revised it, added a lot more 105 00:06:56,080 --> 00:07:00,200 Speaker 1: things that people have been asking or conversation is that 106 00:07:00,240 --> 00:07:06,320 Speaker 1: I've been seeing. And yes, the rest is kind of history. Yeah, 107 00:07:06,360 --> 00:07:08,880 Speaker 1: I like that fact because I've been following your community 108 00:07:08,960 --> 00:07:10,400 Speaker 1: for a while, and I like the fact that you 109 00:07:10,480 --> 00:07:13,119 Speaker 1: kind of like share a little insight until you unto 110 00:07:13,280 --> 00:07:16,400 Speaker 1: who you are in your own relationship with your own pussy. 111 00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:18,200 Speaker 1: Well we can talk about later. But I thought that 112 00:07:18,240 --> 00:07:20,160 Speaker 1: was really good because it's kind of help for me 113 00:07:20,200 --> 00:07:23,040 Speaker 1: as a reader get an idea of why did you 114 00:07:23,080 --> 00:07:25,920 Speaker 1: write this book and not understand how how you connected 115 00:07:26,000 --> 00:07:28,360 Speaker 1: your story with a lot of our own stories. So 116 00:07:28,480 --> 00:07:31,520 Speaker 1: I thought that was dope. So I had to borrow 117 00:07:31,600 --> 00:07:33,400 Speaker 1: this question from your book because I thought this question 118 00:07:33,440 --> 00:07:36,680 Speaker 1: was really good. It had me thinking who taught you 119 00:07:36,720 --> 00:07:38,720 Speaker 1: about what it was, what it meant to be a woman, 120 00:07:38,880 --> 00:07:41,080 Speaker 1: and when did you learn and how did it make 121 00:07:41,120 --> 00:07:44,080 Speaker 1: you feel about womanhood? I thought that was such a 122 00:07:44,080 --> 00:07:49,120 Speaker 1: good question. Man. So so I used to be a teacher, 123 00:07:49,440 --> 00:07:54,160 Speaker 1: so I'm very good at questions, but answering them who, 124 00:07:55,040 --> 00:07:58,000 Speaker 1: that's a big question. I wrote it. I don't have 125 00:07:58,080 --> 00:08:04,040 Speaker 1: to answer that. That's for them. Uh so who? Okay? 126 00:08:04,080 --> 00:08:10,160 Speaker 1: Who taught me? Nobody? Really? I think, I answer, I know, 127 00:08:10,280 --> 00:08:14,480 Speaker 1: but I didn't have any like explicit conversations. I didn't 128 00:08:14,520 --> 00:08:18,000 Speaker 1: have any like you know, mommy daughter, We go to 129 00:08:18,120 --> 00:08:20,800 Speaker 1: lunch or something, and we had like, no, we didn't 130 00:08:20,800 --> 00:08:25,320 Speaker 1: do none of that. Like I think I learned by experiencing, 131 00:08:26,200 --> 00:08:32,600 Speaker 1: and I learned by example, both good example and bad example. UM. 132 00:08:32,640 --> 00:08:35,000 Speaker 1: And I just kind of figured out for myself like 133 00:08:36,240 --> 00:08:40,600 Speaker 1: what kind of person I was going to be? UM. 134 00:08:40,679 --> 00:08:44,360 Speaker 1: And then thankfully I grew up in the age of 135 00:08:44,520 --> 00:08:49,840 Speaker 1: the Internet, at Google and having a computer at home, 136 00:08:50,240 --> 00:08:54,439 Speaker 1: so you know, I got to look up some things 137 00:08:54,520 --> 00:08:57,959 Speaker 1: when I was confused or had a question or had 138 00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:00,560 Speaker 1: heard something that's cool and been like, what what are 139 00:09:00,559 --> 00:09:04,840 Speaker 1: they talking about? What is that? So I attribute my 140 00:09:04,840 --> 00:09:09,400 Speaker 1: my learning to experience and to the great people at 141 00:09:09,400 --> 00:09:15,880 Speaker 1: Google dot com. Yeah. Thanks, What were the signs that 142 00:09:15,960 --> 00:09:18,160 Speaker 1: your pussy was telling you that you needed to reconnect 143 00:09:18,200 --> 00:09:24,559 Speaker 1: with it or reconnect with her? Should I say? So? 144 00:09:24,559 --> 00:09:31,320 Speaker 1: So many? UM? I just I knew that I did 145 00:09:31,360 --> 00:09:34,839 Speaker 1: not have a healthy relationship with my body UM for 146 00:09:34,880 --> 00:09:39,000 Speaker 1: a number of reasons, but also I realized that I 147 00:09:39,040 --> 00:09:43,840 Speaker 1: was UM just having different symptoms and like things happening 148 00:09:43,960 --> 00:09:48,960 Speaker 1: that weren't happening before. UM. And so pretty early on, 149 00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:52,520 Speaker 1: I think I was maybe twelve or thirteen, I was 150 00:09:52,640 --> 00:09:58,760 Speaker 1: diagnosed with polycystic ovarian syndrome. And so what is that 151 00:09:59,120 --> 00:10:01,240 Speaker 1: for those who don't know. For those who don't know, 152 00:10:01,480 --> 00:10:06,160 Speaker 1: it's it's so much. It's in simplest terms, it's when 153 00:10:06,240 --> 00:10:09,559 Speaker 1: you are growing cists on your ovaries. The cists are 154 00:10:09,640 --> 00:10:13,400 Speaker 1: not cancerous or anything, but they just grow there. Um. 155 00:10:13,559 --> 00:10:16,480 Speaker 1: Almost every woman grows sins at one point or another, 156 00:10:16,520 --> 00:10:20,160 Speaker 1: but they typically go away. For people with PCOS that's 157 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:26,040 Speaker 1: not what happens. They stay. Um, they disrupt hormones. Um. 158 00:10:26,120 --> 00:10:31,680 Speaker 1: It also affects things like your blood sugar, um, your heart. UM. 159 00:10:31,720 --> 00:10:34,520 Speaker 1: I mean pcos is is a is a beast. It 160 00:10:34,800 --> 00:10:42,760 Speaker 1: affects everything. So but that's it's, oh, yeah, you really 161 00:10:42,760 --> 00:10:45,559 Speaker 1: got to stay on top of it, and so I didn't. 162 00:10:45,840 --> 00:10:48,520 Speaker 1: That's another way that I kind of reconnected with myself 163 00:10:48,559 --> 00:10:52,480 Speaker 1: because doctors don't really know what it is or why 164 00:10:52,559 --> 00:10:55,000 Speaker 1: you even get it. You know, I was fine up 165 00:10:55,080 --> 00:10:59,120 Speaker 1: until middle school high school, when suddenly I stopped getting 166 00:10:59,120 --> 00:11:01,479 Speaker 1: a period and I was like, well, I'm not pregnant, 167 00:11:01,559 --> 00:11:06,440 Speaker 1: so what's happening. And so just learning over the years 168 00:11:06,440 --> 00:11:08,960 Speaker 1: all the different symptoms and ways that it can manifest 169 00:11:09,480 --> 00:11:13,160 Speaker 1: and I just felt like that was just a sign like, Yeah, 170 00:11:13,280 --> 00:11:15,040 Speaker 1: you need to tap back in, you need to be 171 00:11:15,160 --> 00:11:18,400 Speaker 1: more intentional with your body. You need to be very 172 00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:22,440 Speaker 1: careful with your body, especially now with this condition. Like 173 00:11:22,520 --> 00:11:24,720 Speaker 1: there are just things you cannot do. There's just things 174 00:11:24,760 --> 00:11:27,800 Speaker 1: you cannot consume. There's just things that you cannot you know, 175 00:11:28,520 --> 00:11:32,760 Speaker 1: practice whatever. Like you just have to be more intentional 176 00:11:32,840 --> 00:11:36,840 Speaker 1: about how you treat your body. Um. One of my 177 00:11:36,960 --> 00:11:39,640 Speaker 1: favorite things that I really liked about your book is 178 00:11:39,840 --> 00:11:42,880 Speaker 1: you went down the history of how powerful and how 179 00:11:42,960 --> 00:11:46,240 Speaker 1: the pussy was being worshiped throughout the years, So you 180 00:11:46,280 --> 00:11:48,120 Speaker 1: don't have to go into great detail, but just to 181 00:11:48,160 --> 00:11:51,480 Speaker 1: give those like a background of that particular part. Because 182 00:11:51,520 --> 00:11:53,439 Speaker 1: I was thinking up to myself like damn, like that 183 00:11:53,520 --> 00:11:55,800 Speaker 1: is so true, Like I don't think that a lot 184 00:11:55,840 --> 00:11:58,920 Speaker 1: of women know how powerful their their vagina is or 185 00:11:58,960 --> 00:12:04,680 Speaker 1: just the history of it it. So I um, I'm 186 00:12:04,679 --> 00:12:09,200 Speaker 1: really into like history specifically, like anthropology and just the 187 00:12:09,240 --> 00:12:13,160 Speaker 1: study of humans, humankind, how we got to be who 188 00:12:13,200 --> 00:12:16,960 Speaker 1: we are now. Um. So one of my favorite things 189 00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:20,880 Speaker 1: to do is to deep dive on different topics or whatever. 190 00:12:21,120 --> 00:12:25,040 Speaker 1: And I really like the topic of religion, and so 191 00:12:25,880 --> 00:12:28,480 Speaker 1: I was just you know, going through like you know, 192 00:12:28,520 --> 00:12:31,559 Speaker 1: what are the you know what, who are the forefathers 193 00:12:31,640 --> 00:12:35,160 Speaker 1: of our current day? You know, religions and what did 194 00:12:35,240 --> 00:12:37,400 Speaker 1: they do? And you know the first humans on Earth, 195 00:12:37,440 --> 00:12:40,880 Speaker 1: did they have religion? Just random nerdy questions like that. 196 00:12:40,880 --> 00:12:44,520 Speaker 1: That's what I do in my spare time. So I was, 197 00:12:44,960 --> 00:12:47,559 Speaker 1: you know, doing my little nerdy Google shout out to 198 00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:53,959 Speaker 1: Google again and I came across these like cave drawings 199 00:12:54,760 --> 00:12:59,200 Speaker 1: and they seem to be in a number of places 200 00:12:59,240 --> 00:13:04,680 Speaker 1: all over the world world, but they were very clearly vaginas. 201 00:13:04,800 --> 00:13:10,439 Speaker 1: So people were just painting vaginas all over cave walls. 202 00:13:11,040 --> 00:13:13,960 Speaker 1: Wait wait, wait, wait, way back when and when you 203 00:13:14,000 --> 00:13:16,680 Speaker 1: think about it, I mean, this is primitive life, this 204 00:13:16,760 --> 00:13:23,040 Speaker 1: is ancient human life. You see new people coming out 205 00:13:23,080 --> 00:13:28,559 Speaker 1: of this person's hole, and then they come out and 206 00:13:28,600 --> 00:13:30,760 Speaker 1: grow up and become a person, and we do it 207 00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:34,120 Speaker 1: all over again. That was probably magic, you know what 208 00:13:34,200 --> 00:13:37,480 Speaker 1: I'm saying. Like, before you knew anything about science and 209 00:13:38,200 --> 00:13:40,320 Speaker 1: you know, births and things like that, you're just like, 210 00:13:40,440 --> 00:13:44,880 Speaker 1: whoa like, brand new people come out of there. That's crazy. 211 00:13:45,000 --> 00:13:48,120 Speaker 1: So naturally that's something that they revere, something that they 212 00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:52,680 Speaker 1: worshiped because everybody couldn't do it. And when they did, 213 00:13:52,760 --> 00:13:55,000 Speaker 1: you know, that's how their families grew, us, our communities 214 00:13:55,040 --> 00:14:00,360 Speaker 1: grew that's how countries grew. And so this the China 215 00:14:00,720 --> 00:14:04,439 Speaker 1: became something that was to be honored, to be revered, 216 00:14:04,480 --> 00:14:08,040 Speaker 1: to be respected, because you know, there was no life 217 00:14:08,160 --> 00:14:12,280 Speaker 1: without it UM. So following that, I just kind of 218 00:14:12,360 --> 00:14:16,800 Speaker 1: went down, right, who went down a rabbit hole of 219 00:14:16,880 --> 00:14:21,440 Speaker 1: just how women were worshiped all over the world. You know, 220 00:14:21,560 --> 00:14:24,960 Speaker 1: simultaneously they didn't even really have contact with each other, 221 00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:27,120 Speaker 1: but they were all doing the same thing. Like if 222 00:14:27,200 --> 00:14:30,680 Speaker 1: you go from you know, Native Americans to people who 223 00:14:30,760 --> 00:14:34,880 Speaker 1: were living out in like the Asian continent, like Australia, 224 00:14:35,040 --> 00:14:39,880 Speaker 1: like all these different groups of people were recognizing and 225 00:14:39,960 --> 00:14:44,640 Speaker 1: honoring the same thing. And that's evident in what they 226 00:14:44,720 --> 00:14:49,040 Speaker 1: left behind, which is figurines UM that were usually shaped 227 00:14:49,080 --> 00:14:54,000 Speaker 1: like very voluptuous women, large breast, large bellies UM. And 228 00:14:54,080 --> 00:14:59,480 Speaker 1: these cave caking m these cave paintings that had the 229 00:14:59,560 --> 00:15:04,280 Speaker 1: same sort of voluptuous figures or just straight up vaginas um. 230 00:15:04,720 --> 00:15:10,560 Speaker 1: There were also these um like figurings and like paintings 231 00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:14,360 Speaker 1: that they called Sheila, Sheila and the Gigs or something 232 00:15:14,440 --> 00:15:21,040 Speaker 1: like that, where it is an exaggerated UM figure of 233 00:15:21,400 --> 00:15:25,080 Speaker 1: a woman spreading her like squatting and spreading her vagina, 234 00:15:25,560 --> 00:15:29,520 Speaker 1: and we know that that's how women gave birth before 235 00:15:29,600 --> 00:15:31,920 Speaker 1: birth was medicalized, and they made you lay down in 236 00:15:31,960 --> 00:15:34,680 Speaker 1: a bed in the hospital and all of that you squatted, 237 00:15:35,360 --> 00:15:38,840 Speaker 1: that baby came out and you know, and so these 238 00:15:38,880 --> 00:15:43,520 Speaker 1: figurings just symbolize them. This was something that was special, 239 00:15:43,600 --> 00:15:46,200 Speaker 1: This was something that was important. You have to consider 240 00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:48,720 Speaker 1: that people wasn't just making art for art's sake. That 241 00:15:48,840 --> 00:15:51,800 Speaker 1: just wasn't happening. We needed to eat, We needed to 242 00:15:51,840 --> 00:15:54,680 Speaker 1: take care of, you know, our people, and that was that. 243 00:15:54,960 --> 00:15:57,760 Speaker 1: So if they made the time to paint something or 244 00:15:57,880 --> 00:16:02,240 Speaker 1: carve something, it was really really really important. M So 245 00:16:02,280 --> 00:16:04,320 Speaker 1: why do you think that there are so much negative 246 00:16:04,560 --> 00:16:07,360 Speaker 1: connotation around the word pussy Because even when I was 247 00:16:07,400 --> 00:16:10,600 Speaker 1: growing up, I used to hate saying that word. So 248 00:16:10,640 --> 00:16:12,800 Speaker 1: it's like, but then I was thinking myself, like, especially 249 00:16:12,840 --> 00:16:15,720 Speaker 1: after UM, once I finished reading your book, I was like, 250 00:16:15,720 --> 00:16:17,480 Speaker 1: why did I hate that word so much? Like? Where 251 00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:22,240 Speaker 1: did they come from? Um? It's cultural, it's cultural. It's 252 00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:25,600 Speaker 1: um just you know, it has a lot to do 253 00:16:25,680 --> 00:16:28,960 Speaker 1: with maybe like ways that we were raised or just 254 00:16:29,160 --> 00:16:32,480 Speaker 1: things that we were taught were proper or improper. UM. 255 00:16:32,520 --> 00:16:37,160 Speaker 1: A lot of respectability goes into the words that we 256 00:16:37,240 --> 00:16:41,720 Speaker 1: choose to use, and so I knew that using the 257 00:16:41,760 --> 00:16:50,000 Speaker 1: word pussy would be controversial, provocative, like right, people would 258 00:16:50,040 --> 00:16:52,360 Speaker 1: be like what is you? Who is this? And what 259 00:16:52,400 --> 00:16:55,760 Speaker 1: are they doing? I actually see people in different Facebook 260 00:16:55,800 --> 00:16:57,840 Speaker 1: groups who of course don't know that I wrote it, 261 00:16:58,120 --> 00:17:00,880 Speaker 1: and they're like what is this? Like anybody read this? 262 00:17:01,160 --> 00:17:05,640 Speaker 1: What is this? And I just laughed because I'm like, O, goodness, 263 00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:09,879 Speaker 1: it's fine. It's it's not what you're thinking. It's okay. Um. 264 00:17:10,000 --> 00:17:13,800 Speaker 1: But I think that people just are uncomfortable. I mean, 265 00:17:13,840 --> 00:17:17,720 Speaker 1: people are uncomfortable with vagina, people are uncomfortable with all 266 00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:20,920 Speaker 1: kinds of work. They're just uncomfortable with the female anatomy. 267 00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:23,760 Speaker 1: So I don't really think it's so much of the 268 00:17:23,800 --> 00:17:27,280 Speaker 1: word pussy, even though it's been like I don't know, 269 00:17:28,560 --> 00:17:33,680 Speaker 1: it's in rap songs and then you know, it's everywhere 270 00:17:33,920 --> 00:17:37,000 Speaker 1: and so people kind of associated with you know, crass 271 00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:41,080 Speaker 1: and you know, just disgusting things. But it doesn't have 272 00:17:41,200 --> 00:17:44,160 Speaker 1: to be there, Like the same way people can reclaim 273 00:17:44,200 --> 00:17:47,120 Speaker 1: other words and you know, use them in a way 274 00:17:47,160 --> 00:17:52,119 Speaker 1: that feels empowering, we can use pussy. Um. So I 275 00:17:52,119 --> 00:17:54,160 Speaker 1: don't know, if you had chance listens to this episode. 276 00:17:54,280 --> 00:17:56,800 Speaker 1: I did an episode with one of my guests and 277 00:17:56,880 --> 00:17:59,800 Speaker 1: she was talking about how sex is painful. So as 278 00:17:59,840 --> 00:18:01,760 Speaker 1: we you're in an interview, and I have a relationship 279 00:18:01,840 --> 00:18:04,159 Speaker 1: with when my guests were like really good friends, so 280 00:18:04,200 --> 00:18:07,399 Speaker 1: as we're doing an interview, um, she came out and 281 00:18:07,440 --> 00:18:13,240 Speaker 1: said how she was molested when she was younger. And 282 00:18:13,280 --> 00:18:15,520 Speaker 1: I was like, oh, so maybe that had a Maybe 283 00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:17,439 Speaker 1: that has a reason why you're not able to like 284 00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:21,520 Speaker 1: fully enjoy the trauma that you endured. And then you 285 00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:24,440 Speaker 1: shared your own trauma within the book. So how can 286 00:18:24,520 --> 00:18:27,600 Speaker 1: someone How can someone trauma affect their relationship with their vagina? 287 00:18:27,720 --> 00:18:30,080 Speaker 1: Because I don't think people can put I don't think 288 00:18:30,080 --> 00:18:33,800 Speaker 1: people realize, like certain things in your childhood, they it 289 00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:38,360 Speaker 1: does affect your adulthood, you know, absolutely absolutely, And if 290 00:18:38,359 --> 00:18:43,160 Speaker 1: you don't, uh, you know, process that and and move 291 00:18:43,280 --> 00:18:46,800 Speaker 1: past it and heal from it, it will continue to 292 00:18:46,920 --> 00:18:51,159 Speaker 1: manifest in various ways. You know. I can't be certain, 293 00:18:51,200 --> 00:18:54,960 Speaker 1: of course, but I really always felt like this PCOS 294 00:18:55,160 --> 00:19:00,320 Speaker 1: was a manifestation of the herd, the trauma, the ignore oring, 295 00:19:01,480 --> 00:19:05,119 Speaker 1: the disgust that I had at my own body. And 296 00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:09,879 Speaker 1: I also realized that like when I am in a 297 00:19:09,960 --> 00:19:12,280 Speaker 1: good place. I'm feeling good about myself and I'm taking 298 00:19:12,280 --> 00:19:14,439 Speaker 1: care of myself. It's almost like I don't have it. 299 00:19:14,480 --> 00:19:16,359 Speaker 1: I don't have any of the symptoms, and I'm good. 300 00:19:16,840 --> 00:19:19,919 Speaker 1: And when I fall off from that, you know, my 301 00:19:20,000 --> 00:19:23,719 Speaker 1: body reminds me, hey, you're not doing what you're supposed 302 00:19:23,760 --> 00:19:25,760 Speaker 1: to do. And so I just think that the body 303 00:19:25,840 --> 00:19:30,600 Speaker 1: has ways of reminding us that it needs more attention. 304 00:19:30,960 --> 00:19:32,960 Speaker 1: You need to be more intentional, you need to be 305 00:19:33,040 --> 00:19:36,040 Speaker 1: more careful, you need to heal in whatever way that 306 00:19:36,040 --> 00:19:39,600 Speaker 1: that makes sense for you. I think that very, very 307 00:19:39,640 --> 00:19:44,400 Speaker 1: many people with vaginas have experienced some sort of trauma, 308 00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:47,800 Speaker 1: some sort of something that caused them shame, something that 309 00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:52,879 Speaker 1: caused them embarrassment, something that caused them some negative feelings 310 00:19:53,200 --> 00:19:56,520 Speaker 1: that made them kind of detached and ignore that part 311 00:19:56,560 --> 00:20:00,800 Speaker 1: of them. And I mean it can manifest as mentally, 312 00:20:00,880 --> 00:20:05,160 Speaker 1: it can manifest emotionally if you feel right, if like, 313 00:20:05,320 --> 00:20:09,239 Speaker 1: if you're disconnected from yourself, you know, how can you 314 00:20:09,280 --> 00:20:12,639 Speaker 1: really share that with a partner, How can you really, 315 00:20:13,600 --> 00:20:20,200 Speaker 1: you know, experience pleasure when you haven't healed that part 316 00:20:20,240 --> 00:20:23,240 Speaker 1: of yourself. And I think that we try to skip 317 00:20:23,320 --> 00:20:24,840 Speaker 1: over that, and a lot of time we try to 318 00:20:24,920 --> 00:20:28,040 Speaker 1: use sex and other things as a means of ignoring 319 00:20:28,280 --> 00:20:30,359 Speaker 1: and like, you know, I don't have to think about it. 320 00:20:30,359 --> 00:20:33,159 Speaker 1: It's okay, we're just gonna do this and it's a distraction. 321 00:20:33,760 --> 00:20:37,760 Speaker 1: But sooner or later, those same feelings and those same 322 00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:40,160 Speaker 1: symptoms will rise back up. So I just really think 323 00:20:40,240 --> 00:20:44,240 Speaker 1: that anybody who has experienced those things, they are painful, 324 00:20:44,400 --> 00:20:49,880 Speaker 1: they are traumatic. It's awful work trying to heal them 325 00:20:49,960 --> 00:20:54,800 Speaker 1: and get past them, but it's necessary work. So what 326 00:20:54,920 --> 00:20:56,840 Speaker 1: are some ways that you think that we can take 327 00:20:56,880 --> 00:21:03,920 Speaker 1: better care of our vaginas? So I think first job, 328 00:21:07,600 --> 00:21:11,119 Speaker 1: I mean, so I think of everything from you know, 329 00:21:11,240 --> 00:21:15,760 Speaker 1: three different planes mental, mental, emotional, spiritual, and physical. And 330 00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:20,760 Speaker 1: so my first thing is always physical, what you can touch, 331 00:21:20,840 --> 00:21:24,840 Speaker 1: what is tangible, what you can see, um, because I 332 00:21:24,840 --> 00:21:28,000 Speaker 1: feel like that affects our mental, and our mental in 333 00:21:28,040 --> 00:21:32,480 Speaker 1: turn affects our spiritual. So if I was gonna give 334 00:21:32,520 --> 00:21:35,320 Speaker 1: anybody any advice, and I have nobody's doctor, let's just 335 00:21:35,359 --> 00:21:37,320 Speaker 1: put that out there in case you try something that 336 00:21:37,359 --> 00:21:41,200 Speaker 1: I said and you're like, that didn't work for me. 337 00:21:41,640 --> 00:21:44,560 Speaker 1: None of my business. This was just a suggestion. Um. 338 00:21:44,600 --> 00:21:48,120 Speaker 1: I think that first, being mindful about what you eat. 339 00:21:48,280 --> 00:21:52,159 Speaker 1: I'm never gonna tell anybody how they should eat. Do 340 00:21:52,200 --> 00:21:55,399 Speaker 1: you know that things affect you differently? Stop eating those, like, 341 00:21:55,680 --> 00:21:58,280 Speaker 1: stop doing that to your body. If you know that 342 00:21:58,320 --> 00:22:00,600 Speaker 1: you eat things sometimes and it throws off your pH 343 00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:06,520 Speaker 1: probably limit those. Don't do that. So um, water water, water, water, 344 00:22:07,119 --> 00:22:11,920 Speaker 1: so much water. Drink water, real water, not sugar water, 345 00:22:12,119 --> 00:22:16,480 Speaker 1: not cool aid, not sweet tea like actual factual water. 346 00:22:16,560 --> 00:22:21,760 Speaker 1: Your body needs water. Your vagina especially needs water. Um. 347 00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:24,359 Speaker 1: After that, I mean you can get into kind of 348 00:22:24,400 --> 00:22:29,879 Speaker 1: herbal remedies. I personally like herbal teas. So I drink 349 00:22:30,400 --> 00:22:35,560 Speaker 1: um like red raspberry leaf tea, nettle tea. Um. Those 350 00:22:35,800 --> 00:22:41,040 Speaker 1: teas have properties that really help with your UM just 351 00:22:41,160 --> 00:22:44,679 Speaker 1: your a reproductive area in general. Um. And then I 352 00:22:44,800 --> 00:22:48,399 Speaker 1: like to drink teese. They don't necessarily have caffeine, but 353 00:22:48,480 --> 00:22:50,879 Speaker 1: just to really hydrate my body because you know, you 354 00:22:50,920 --> 00:22:58,240 Speaker 1: want that thing with so provide down there. Like they 355 00:22:58,280 --> 00:23:00,320 Speaker 1: don't just do that by myself. You've got to give 356 00:23:00,400 --> 00:23:03,200 Speaker 1: us something to work with, So you gotta really make 357 00:23:03,200 --> 00:23:06,760 Speaker 1: sure that you're hydrated. UM. I think that once you 358 00:23:06,800 --> 00:23:09,240 Speaker 1: do that and you start to see those changes, you know, 359 00:23:09,359 --> 00:23:12,960 Speaker 1: it kind of changes your mental as. Okay, like I 360 00:23:13,040 --> 00:23:15,320 Speaker 1: see how I need to engage with you. I see 361 00:23:15,359 --> 00:23:17,960 Speaker 1: how I need to treat you in order for you 362 00:23:18,000 --> 00:23:21,280 Speaker 1: to respond the way I want you to respond. I 363 00:23:21,320 --> 00:23:27,840 Speaker 1: am a big fan of Joni Steen. Um is that 364 00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:31,600 Speaker 1: the vaginal statement. I was going to ask you about that? Okay, good, 365 00:23:31,600 --> 00:23:35,080 Speaker 1: go ahead. I'm a I'm a big fan, big big fan. 366 00:23:35,800 --> 00:23:39,520 Speaker 1: And you know it's a little tricky if you're doing 367 00:23:39,560 --> 00:23:43,880 Speaker 1: it yourself. I actually do recommend seeing a professional. There 368 00:23:43,880 --> 00:23:46,680 Speaker 1: are like professional folks who will do them for you. 369 00:23:46,720 --> 00:23:48,439 Speaker 1: They can come to your house or you can go 370 00:23:48,520 --> 00:23:52,000 Speaker 1: to their um space, just so that you don't hurt yourself, 371 00:23:52,520 --> 00:23:54,800 Speaker 1: UM and that you kind of learn what you're doing. 372 00:23:55,160 --> 00:23:57,239 Speaker 1: But once you know that, you can absolutely do them 373 00:23:57,280 --> 00:24:00,280 Speaker 1: at home. And I have some tips in the book 374 00:24:00,359 --> 00:24:02,560 Speaker 1: on how to do them at home. But please be 375 00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:05,359 Speaker 1: careful because steam can be too hot and it can't 376 00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:07,800 Speaker 1: burn you, and that is the last place you want 377 00:24:07,800 --> 00:24:12,320 Speaker 1: to be burned. But those herbal properties can really really 378 00:24:12,359 --> 00:24:15,199 Speaker 1: help you, um when they just kinda are able to 379 00:24:15,240 --> 00:24:19,359 Speaker 1: travel up into the vagina and kind of bring down 380 00:24:19,440 --> 00:24:23,840 Speaker 1: and sweat out anything that shouldn't be there. UM. So 381 00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:27,520 Speaker 1: with them, you're sitting on like a pot or something right, 382 00:24:27,600 --> 00:24:30,840 Speaker 1: or like squiding over it. You can like sit over 383 00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:32,400 Speaker 1: We don't want to sit on it, but you want 384 00:24:32,400 --> 00:24:35,600 Speaker 1: to sit over it. Um. So I know that when 385 00:24:35,600 --> 00:24:38,840 Speaker 1: I got them done professionally, I sat on like a 386 00:24:38,880 --> 00:24:41,560 Speaker 1: stool or a seat that had a hole cut out 387 00:24:42,119 --> 00:24:45,600 Speaker 1: and the pot was underneath the seat, so a good 388 00:24:45,600 --> 00:24:49,320 Speaker 1: amount of space between you know, my couci and this 389 00:24:49,480 --> 00:24:53,480 Speaker 1: hot steam, but enough to be able to feel it. Um. 390 00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:57,160 Speaker 1: And then some people want to do them in the toilet, 391 00:24:57,480 --> 00:25:00,600 Speaker 1: which is okay, um if you put a bowl or 392 00:25:00,640 --> 00:25:05,080 Speaker 1: a pot just exactly and then sit over the toilet bowl. 393 00:25:05,160 --> 00:25:07,600 Speaker 1: But I would recommend, you know, again, be careful with 394 00:25:07,640 --> 00:25:12,280 Speaker 1: that steam, because that's not pleasant trying to have vagina 395 00:25:12,320 --> 00:25:15,840 Speaker 1: falling off. Um. And then there are some folks who 396 00:25:15,840 --> 00:25:18,000 Speaker 1: will just like put a pot on the floor and 397 00:25:18,119 --> 00:25:21,320 Speaker 1: just kind of get on their knees and squat over 398 00:25:21,359 --> 00:25:25,240 Speaker 1: it if they can't um. And you know, whatever works 399 00:25:25,280 --> 00:25:29,760 Speaker 1: for folks. But that probably was the first time where 400 00:25:29,800 --> 00:25:33,600 Speaker 1: I was like, oh, they're specific herb you know, medicine 401 00:25:33,640 --> 00:25:39,640 Speaker 1: and like technique for how to engage with this part 402 00:25:39,640 --> 00:25:44,080 Speaker 1: of my body. So that's one of my favorite things. Yeah, 403 00:25:44,119 --> 00:25:45,800 Speaker 1: I've been trying to look for a place because I'm 404 00:25:45,800 --> 00:25:48,399 Speaker 1: in New York. But I guess I'm also sketchy on 405 00:25:48,440 --> 00:25:51,520 Speaker 1: certain people. So I have to reamind me views and sofy. 406 00:25:51,680 --> 00:25:53,960 Speaker 1: That's something intimate and I need that thing to be working. 407 00:25:54,040 --> 00:25:57,040 Speaker 1: So yes, yes, yes, yes, I'm sure New York has 408 00:25:57,119 --> 00:26:00,040 Speaker 1: some some good folks. I'm sure if I found to 409 00:26:00,119 --> 00:26:03,800 Speaker 1: play show, I'll let y'all know. I'd be the test dummy. 410 00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:06,120 Speaker 1: I would be more worried about like some of those 411 00:26:06,160 --> 00:26:09,679 Speaker 1: smaller towns, some towns that aren't quite as you know, 412 00:26:09,840 --> 00:26:15,600 Speaker 1: progressive and liberal, like that's still say private part exactly. 413 00:26:15,720 --> 00:26:17,760 Speaker 1: I don't be like, oh, I don't know, I don't know. 414 00:26:17,880 --> 00:26:21,280 Speaker 1: But you know, there are folks online you can always 415 00:26:21,320 --> 00:26:23,879 Speaker 1: get um. You know, if you find a professional and 416 00:26:23,920 --> 00:26:26,840 Speaker 1: they're not necessarily in your area, you can always ask 417 00:26:26,920 --> 00:26:31,520 Speaker 1: them for recommendations UM or just tips on how to 418 00:26:31,520 --> 00:26:33,719 Speaker 1: do it yourself, or even tips on how to get 419 00:26:34,000 --> 00:26:35,880 Speaker 1: trained and certified to do it so that you can 420 00:26:35,880 --> 00:26:37,520 Speaker 1: do it in your area, if that's something that you 421 00:26:37,560 --> 00:26:40,960 Speaker 1: feel like you're interested in. Another thing I like about 422 00:26:40,960 --> 00:26:45,160 Speaker 1: your book is you talked about the importance of pleasing yourself. 423 00:26:45,240 --> 00:26:47,720 Speaker 1: I think a lot of people, especially women, get a 424 00:26:47,720 --> 00:26:50,239 Speaker 1: little uncomfortable when it come to like masturbation and just 425 00:26:50,240 --> 00:26:53,200 Speaker 1: like getting to know your body. Why do you think that? 426 00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:55,000 Speaker 1: Because I feel like if you don't know your body, 427 00:26:55,000 --> 00:26:58,080 Speaker 1: how can you have somebody else know your body? It 428 00:26:58,280 --> 00:27:05,000 Speaker 1: is this idea that touching yourself or you know, sexuality 429 00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:08,679 Speaker 1: in general, especially for women, is nasty. It's you know, 430 00:27:08,800 --> 00:27:12,200 Speaker 1: you shouldn't do that. That means you're I don't know 431 00:27:12,800 --> 00:27:17,760 Speaker 1: fast your whole, you're this, you're that. And so, like 432 00:27:17,800 --> 00:27:19,879 Speaker 1: I said, when you when you are coming up and 433 00:27:19,920 --> 00:27:22,879 Speaker 1: you're learning about what it means to be a woman 434 00:27:22,960 --> 00:27:25,880 Speaker 1: and what it means to have a vagina and all 435 00:27:25,880 --> 00:27:29,199 Speaker 1: these kinds of things, you really do pick up on 436 00:27:29,440 --> 00:27:31,840 Speaker 1: the things around you. And if what you're picking up 437 00:27:31,920 --> 00:27:35,720 Speaker 1: is oh, that's bad and that's nasty and you know, 438 00:27:36,359 --> 00:27:38,480 Speaker 1: God gonna get me or whatever it is that you're 439 00:27:38,480 --> 00:27:41,000 Speaker 1: picking up, do you really carry that with you, even 440 00:27:41,040 --> 00:27:44,640 Speaker 1: if it's subconscious. So I feel like people just need 441 00:27:44,720 --> 00:27:49,760 Speaker 1: to do their inner work to really unpack why they 442 00:27:49,800 --> 00:27:53,720 Speaker 1: feel so disgusted, why they feel this aversion to their 443 00:27:53,760 --> 00:27:58,080 Speaker 1: own bodies. Um, and who taught them that somebody else 444 00:27:58,160 --> 00:28:02,439 Speaker 1: is supposed to be the the expert on your body? 445 00:28:02,520 --> 00:28:07,520 Speaker 1: I remember being in college and just listening to the 446 00:28:07,600 --> 00:28:10,880 Speaker 1: conversations that some of the girls would have like, oh, well, 447 00:28:10,960 --> 00:28:14,439 Speaker 1: I figure he would just know X, Y and Z, 448 00:28:15,000 --> 00:28:17,760 Speaker 1: And I'm like, says, he's had a penis for like 449 00:28:17,800 --> 00:28:25,679 Speaker 1: twenty years, Why would you know anything about I expect 450 00:28:25,760 --> 00:28:28,560 Speaker 1: him to be the expert on penis. He's had it 451 00:28:28,600 --> 00:28:31,720 Speaker 1: for decades, he's had his whole life. I expect him 452 00:28:31,760 --> 00:28:33,879 Speaker 1: to know that. I don't expect him to know nothing 453 00:28:34,480 --> 00:28:38,400 Speaker 1: about what I got, Like, what, how does that even 454 00:28:38,440 --> 00:28:41,960 Speaker 1: make sense? But that was like, why didn't we think 455 00:28:42,000 --> 00:28:43,960 Speaker 1: that they're supposed to know how to put us off 456 00:28:43,960 --> 00:28:49,040 Speaker 1: the back? Because we're taught that men are you know, 457 00:28:49,160 --> 00:28:52,080 Speaker 1: taught to and encouraged to be sexual to sold their 458 00:28:52,160 --> 00:28:55,280 Speaker 1: royal oaths. It's okay for them to be having sex, 459 00:28:55,600 --> 00:28:58,200 Speaker 1: you know, even at early ages. It's okay for them 460 00:28:58,240 --> 00:29:00,680 Speaker 1: to be out here doing these things. My question is 461 00:29:00,720 --> 00:29:02,720 Speaker 1: always if it's okay for them to have sex, but 462 00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:04,640 Speaker 1: it's not okay for girls to have sex. Who exactly 463 00:29:04,640 --> 00:29:07,920 Speaker 1: are the men supposed to have sex with? Like that 464 00:29:08,040 --> 00:29:11,400 Speaker 1: just doesn't what are we supposed to do? So it's 465 00:29:11,440 --> 00:29:13,920 Speaker 1: just a mess and people just need to unpack their 466 00:29:13,920 --> 00:29:17,000 Speaker 1: own issues with their own bodies, And honestly, some of 467 00:29:17,040 --> 00:29:19,880 Speaker 1: that does come from trauma. Some of that does come from, 468 00:29:19,920 --> 00:29:24,200 Speaker 1: you know, feeling feelings of disgust or version because of 469 00:29:24,360 --> 00:29:26,680 Speaker 1: things that have happened to you. And like I said, 470 00:29:26,760 --> 00:29:29,280 Speaker 1: like you have to unpack that, you have to work 471 00:29:29,320 --> 00:29:32,520 Speaker 1: through that in order to come to a better place 472 00:29:32,560 --> 00:29:35,000 Speaker 1: and a better understanding of yourself. So that means going 473 00:29:35,040 --> 00:29:37,800 Speaker 1: to therapy, then go to therapy. If that means finding 474 00:29:37,800 --> 00:29:42,720 Speaker 1: a tradition, do that, like whatever it is, it's going 475 00:29:42,760 --> 00:29:45,120 Speaker 1: to help you do that. And you also talked about 476 00:29:45,160 --> 00:29:47,680 Speaker 1: the importance of having a sister circle, which I thought 477 00:29:47,680 --> 00:29:50,520 Speaker 1: that was amazing, like a really good core of women 478 00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:54,680 Speaker 1: that you can rely on that you can build with. Yes, 479 00:29:54,880 --> 00:29:59,280 Speaker 1: I am a proponent of sisterhood. I will say from 480 00:29:59,360 --> 00:30:03,240 Speaker 1: the rooftipe, sisterhood is them there my religion. Like I 481 00:30:03,280 --> 00:30:05,000 Speaker 1: heard one of my elders say that one time, and 482 00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:09,600 Speaker 1: I was like, yes, actually yea, Like sister is it, 483 00:30:09,920 --> 00:30:15,560 Speaker 1: Like it's everything. Sisterhood can literally provide you with everything 484 00:30:16,040 --> 00:30:19,719 Speaker 1: that you ever needed or wanted. It is the most 485 00:30:20,280 --> 00:30:23,680 Speaker 1: fulfilling thing to know that you have a group of 486 00:30:23,720 --> 00:30:27,400 Speaker 1: people behind you who know you, who you've been vulnerable 487 00:30:27,480 --> 00:30:30,040 Speaker 1: with who have seen all of you good and bad, 488 00:30:30,400 --> 00:30:33,840 Speaker 1: and they got you like no matter what. Like you 489 00:30:33,880 --> 00:30:37,160 Speaker 1: don't have to worry about them, you know, telling your business. 490 00:30:37,240 --> 00:30:40,120 Speaker 1: You don't have to worry about them bringing stuff up 491 00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:43,440 Speaker 1: and holding it over your head, starting stuff. You don't 492 00:30:43,480 --> 00:30:46,440 Speaker 1: have to worry about feeling like you ask your stupid questions, 493 00:30:46,720 --> 00:30:49,760 Speaker 1: or you're in situations that nobody else has been in, 494 00:30:49,840 --> 00:30:52,239 Speaker 1: like nine times out of saying you are not the 495 00:30:52,320 --> 00:30:54,920 Speaker 1: only one. And having a group of folks around you, 496 00:30:54,920 --> 00:30:57,560 Speaker 1: and not even a big group, but just having people 497 00:30:57,600 --> 00:31:00,080 Speaker 1: around you who you can share those experiences with it 498 00:31:00,080 --> 00:31:02,600 Speaker 1: and somebody could say, oh girl, oh did that last 499 00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:05,000 Speaker 1: year or get that happened to me too, or yeah, 500 00:31:05,000 --> 00:31:07,280 Speaker 1: I experienced that, and it makes you feel so much 501 00:31:07,360 --> 00:31:11,600 Speaker 1: less alone out here and so much more normal. It's amazing. 502 00:31:11,720 --> 00:31:17,120 Speaker 1: Like I think that people prioritize romantic love and that's 503 00:31:17,160 --> 00:31:19,240 Speaker 1: kind of their end all be all, I want a husband, 504 00:31:19,280 --> 00:31:22,320 Speaker 1: I want to you know whatever. But honestly, like that, 505 00:31:22,560 --> 00:31:25,760 Speaker 1: sister love is probably some of the most intimate love 506 00:31:25,840 --> 00:31:30,600 Speaker 1: you're ever go fact, man, I mean, it's nothing like 507 00:31:30,680 --> 00:31:33,440 Speaker 1: having like conversations with another woman that you can really 508 00:31:33,440 --> 00:31:36,200 Speaker 1: trust and like, especially if they already been through it, 509 00:31:36,240 --> 00:31:38,760 Speaker 1: and you can just tell they know how vulnerable you is, 510 00:31:38,760 --> 00:31:40,480 Speaker 1: so they just let you have it, like this is 511 00:31:40,480 --> 00:31:41,880 Speaker 1: what you need to do. I'm gonna help you do this. 512 00:31:42,040 --> 00:31:45,120 Speaker 1: Talk to this person like that is really important. I 513 00:31:45,120 --> 00:31:47,640 Speaker 1: think a lot of women sometimes miss is the essence 514 00:31:47,640 --> 00:31:50,680 Speaker 1: of having us as the hood for real, and even 515 00:31:50,760 --> 00:31:54,160 Speaker 1: making an intergenerational Like the first kind of sisterhood that 516 00:31:54,200 --> 00:31:57,320 Speaker 1: I had, we were around the same age. So there 517 00:31:57,320 --> 00:31:59,840 Speaker 1: were things that you know, we can help each other with. 518 00:32:00,080 --> 00:32:03,040 Speaker 1: There were other things that we're like, we haven't been 519 00:32:03,080 --> 00:32:05,440 Speaker 1: there yet, we haven't gotten there yet. But when I 520 00:32:05,880 --> 00:32:09,240 Speaker 1: joined different communities and I realized, you know, I'm no 521 00:32:09,320 --> 00:32:12,200 Speaker 1: longer playing the big sister role that I'm used to playing, 522 00:32:12,280 --> 00:32:14,880 Speaker 1: Like now I'm the little sister, like the lu little sister, 523 00:32:15,120 --> 00:32:17,440 Speaker 1: Like these women are old enough to be my mama, 524 00:32:17,560 --> 00:32:20,480 Speaker 1: my grandma, and they've given me that real, that truth 525 00:32:20,600 --> 00:32:27,320 Speaker 1: like I want um. Another thing that I loved about 526 00:32:27,360 --> 00:32:30,720 Speaker 1: your book is you gave us affirmations about when you 527 00:32:30,760 --> 00:32:34,240 Speaker 1: need to reaffirm your power and your vagina. One of 528 00:32:34,240 --> 00:32:36,280 Speaker 1: my favorite ones that you wrote, and I always said 529 00:32:36,280 --> 00:32:38,640 Speaker 1: it to myself, is I am proud of myself for 530 00:32:38,720 --> 00:32:45,760 Speaker 1: what I survived. What is your top three? When I 531 00:32:45,800 --> 00:32:49,760 Speaker 1: saw that, I was like, yes, girl, I just I 532 00:32:50,120 --> 00:32:53,560 Speaker 1: can't even It's like picking a favorite child. Like those 533 00:32:54,480 --> 00:32:58,240 Speaker 1: those affirmations came straight out of my brain. I didn't 534 00:32:58,240 --> 00:33:02,240 Speaker 1: get them from anywhere. I beating copy in paste them 535 00:33:02,280 --> 00:33:05,200 Speaker 1: from anywhere. Like everything that I wrote in that section 536 00:33:05,960 --> 00:33:09,360 Speaker 1: came straight from me, And honestly, I don't even know 537 00:33:09,480 --> 00:33:12,040 Speaker 1: if it was me, you know what I mean? Like 538 00:33:12,200 --> 00:33:15,520 Speaker 1: I feel like I just was kind of getting a download. 539 00:33:15,560 --> 00:33:17,560 Speaker 1: I remember the day that I wrote them. I was 540 00:33:17,600 --> 00:33:20,920 Speaker 1: sitting in I think Panera or somewhere, and I was 541 00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:23,560 Speaker 1: just going like it was just coming out, coming out, 542 00:33:23,600 --> 00:33:27,920 Speaker 1: coming out. So all of those are probably things that 543 00:33:28,000 --> 00:33:32,320 Speaker 1: I needed to hear and things that my myself and 544 00:33:32,480 --> 00:33:36,480 Speaker 1: my pussy needed to hear um And because I needed 545 00:33:36,520 --> 00:33:38,520 Speaker 1: to hear it, I just knew that there were other 546 00:33:38,560 --> 00:33:41,360 Speaker 1: people who needed to hear it as well. So wait, 547 00:33:41,360 --> 00:33:44,280 Speaker 1: what is your relationship? Like what you're pussy? Now? Who TI? 548 00:33:44,520 --> 00:33:49,719 Speaker 1: We have a good old time. We have a good 549 00:33:49,720 --> 00:33:52,560 Speaker 1: old time. We are getting there. It is by no 550 00:33:52,680 --> 00:33:55,880 Speaker 1: means perfect, but like we're getting there. We're working some 551 00:33:55,960 --> 00:33:59,640 Speaker 1: things out, you know, and you know, I'm human. I 552 00:33:59,760 --> 00:34:02,040 Speaker 1: fall off. I do stuff I know I'm supposed to do. 553 00:34:02,160 --> 00:34:04,400 Speaker 1: I eat stuff I know I'm supposed to eat, and 554 00:34:04,440 --> 00:34:07,240 Speaker 1: they'd be like, Okay, play games if you want. These 555 00:34:07,240 --> 00:34:10,000 Speaker 1: are the results. Stupid games, get stupid prizes. Now you 556 00:34:10,040 --> 00:34:15,239 Speaker 1: have a yeast infection. Good luck like so and it's 557 00:34:15,280 --> 00:34:18,280 Speaker 1: just being more mindful of that. But like I'm we're good. 558 00:34:18,520 --> 00:34:23,680 Speaker 1: We're good, Like I have no complaints. She's good, like 559 00:34:23,760 --> 00:34:27,040 Speaker 1: you know, And I just feel like it has spilled 560 00:34:27,080 --> 00:34:30,439 Speaker 1: over into other parts of my life, you know, like 561 00:34:31,120 --> 00:34:35,840 Speaker 1: I have no problems connecting with people. I'm in an 562 00:34:35,880 --> 00:34:41,760 Speaker 1: amazing relationship. I you know, manifest things like it's nothing 563 00:34:41,880 --> 00:34:44,320 Speaker 1: like as soon as I decide I want something, boom 564 00:34:44,480 --> 00:34:47,640 Speaker 1: is there. And I don't think that that's just a coincidence, 565 00:34:47,680 --> 00:34:53,160 Speaker 1: you know what I mean? No, that's amazing. Um, what 566 00:34:53,239 --> 00:34:55,960 Speaker 1: do you think? How can we instilled in each other? 567 00:34:56,000 --> 00:34:58,480 Speaker 1: Her power for our pussies is because I think a 568 00:34:58,520 --> 00:35:02,160 Speaker 1: lot of women don't know that the power within them. 569 00:35:02,880 --> 00:35:07,719 Speaker 1: It's like I said, unpacking what you've been taught and 570 00:35:07,920 --> 00:35:11,799 Speaker 1: figuring out really what you believe and where did that 571 00:35:11,880 --> 00:35:14,960 Speaker 1: come from. That's something that I had to do and 572 00:35:14,960 --> 00:35:18,480 Speaker 1: it was really really powerful, just thinking through my thoughts, 573 00:35:18,600 --> 00:35:21,919 Speaker 1: journaling and just getting down too so I could see 574 00:35:21,920 --> 00:35:25,239 Speaker 1: it in front of me, like I just needed to 575 00:35:25,239 --> 00:35:27,399 Speaker 1: see it in front of me, like what is in there? 576 00:35:27,560 --> 00:35:30,960 Speaker 1: What is in my brain that is, you know, making 577 00:35:31,000 --> 00:35:34,879 Speaker 1: me think certain things? And after our journal going back 578 00:35:34,920 --> 00:35:36,960 Speaker 1: through it and saying, Okay, where did that come from? 579 00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:39,040 Speaker 1: Where did I learn that? Where did I hear that? 580 00:35:39,360 --> 00:35:42,160 Speaker 1: What made me believe that? What if I experience that 581 00:35:42,280 --> 00:35:44,759 Speaker 1: made me think that this was true? And once I 582 00:35:44,800 --> 00:35:47,839 Speaker 1: could pull those kinds of things out, it was like, well, 583 00:35:47,880 --> 00:35:51,640 Speaker 1: that's a lie, and that's a lie, and that's not true, 584 00:35:52,120 --> 00:35:54,479 Speaker 1: you know, And so my logical brain could take over 585 00:35:54,560 --> 00:35:57,480 Speaker 1: and be like, no, none of this is correct, you know. 586 00:35:57,880 --> 00:36:00,680 Speaker 1: And then I have to think, who does it benefit 587 00:36:01,200 --> 00:36:05,080 Speaker 1: for me to believe these terrible things about myself? Who 588 00:36:05,120 --> 00:36:08,719 Speaker 1: does it benefit for me to not know how much 589 00:36:08,760 --> 00:36:12,160 Speaker 1: power that I had? And we know the society that 590 00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:15,920 Speaker 1: we live in, if women really knew how much power 591 00:36:16,000 --> 00:36:19,080 Speaker 1: they had, the whole ship would be on fire, like 592 00:36:20,160 --> 00:36:23,480 Speaker 1: the world would be in our whole revolution. But it 593 00:36:23,480 --> 00:36:28,359 Speaker 1: benefits the folks in power. It benefits patriarchy, it benefits capitalism, 594 00:36:28,400 --> 00:36:32,560 Speaker 1: it benefits racism, it benefits sexism, for us to sit 595 00:36:32,680 --> 00:36:37,560 Speaker 1: and believe that we are the lesser of anything, and 596 00:36:37,760 --> 00:36:42,120 Speaker 1: that we are you know, incompetent and incapable and two 597 00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:46,200 Speaker 1: emotional and all these kinds of things. You have to 598 00:36:46,280 --> 00:36:48,960 Speaker 1: really go through. And when you realize that, you think that, 599 00:36:49,040 --> 00:36:51,240 Speaker 1: where did this come from? And who does it benefit 600 00:36:51,719 --> 00:36:53,560 Speaker 1: for me to think that? Because it did so don't 601 00:36:53,560 --> 00:36:56,239 Speaker 1: benefit me? So who is getting the benefit of me 602 00:36:56,320 --> 00:36:58,879 Speaker 1: thinking so low of myself? And how do I dig 603 00:36:58,920 --> 00:37:01,680 Speaker 1: myself out of this? A long time, these stories were 604 00:37:01,680 --> 00:37:04,120 Speaker 1: told to us about us. We didn't tell this to ourselves, 605 00:37:04,160 --> 00:37:07,520 Speaker 1: and that's why we believe it because somebody, let's say 606 00:37:07,520 --> 00:37:10,359 Speaker 1: our mom or dad projected this image on to us. 607 00:37:10,400 --> 00:37:12,840 Speaker 1: And that's why we have all these goddamn issues now 608 00:37:13,120 --> 00:37:15,840 Speaker 1: because it was somebody else told us. And it's because 609 00:37:15,880 --> 00:37:18,400 Speaker 1: somebody's told them. I had to realize that too. I 610 00:37:18,480 --> 00:37:22,839 Speaker 1: was like, you know, a lot of my unpacking had 611 00:37:22,920 --> 00:37:26,280 Speaker 1: to do with my relationship with my mother and really 612 00:37:27,040 --> 00:37:30,919 Speaker 1: combing through that and that is who that's a minefield 613 00:37:31,120 --> 00:37:34,480 Speaker 1: right there, but it really I really had to really 614 00:37:35,560 --> 00:37:37,759 Speaker 1: what am I trying to say? I guess received her 615 00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:43,080 Speaker 1: with empathy and compassion because I know that what she's 616 00:37:43,120 --> 00:37:45,640 Speaker 1: giving me is what was given to her, and I 617 00:37:45,680 --> 00:37:47,880 Speaker 1: know that what was given to her was probably given 618 00:37:47,920 --> 00:37:50,359 Speaker 1: to her mother, and on and on and on. So 619 00:37:52,880 --> 00:37:59,760 Speaker 1: it's that generational trauma, that generational you know, misinformation misteaching 620 00:38:00,440 --> 00:38:04,960 Speaker 1: that we now this generation have to really work to 621 00:38:05,040 --> 00:38:07,960 Speaker 1: unpack or we're going to pass that, damn or we're 622 00:38:07,960 --> 00:38:11,120 Speaker 1: gonna end up having children who are like, no, you're wrong, 623 00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:14,960 Speaker 1: and I don't know what you're saying this to me, 624 00:38:15,200 --> 00:38:19,720 Speaker 1: Like you're completely wrong. And that's part of the generational 625 00:38:19,760 --> 00:38:22,359 Speaker 1: divide that we have now, is like these older people 626 00:38:22,360 --> 00:38:25,120 Speaker 1: are like all these young people they sow, they sow this, 627 00:38:25,200 --> 00:38:27,440 Speaker 1: they so that, and it's like, no, we're just learning 628 00:38:27,520 --> 00:38:31,919 Speaker 1: that what y'all taught us was wrong. We don't blame you, 629 00:38:32,120 --> 00:38:35,000 Speaker 1: but we also need you to understand we're not going 630 00:38:35,080 --> 00:38:38,000 Speaker 1: to abide by this anymore and we're actually gonna work 631 00:38:38,000 --> 00:38:44,800 Speaker 1: within what we know to be true. Girl, what a word? Well, no, 632 00:38:45,080 --> 00:38:47,879 Speaker 1: it's fact. You know. I had therapy today and one 633 00:38:47,880 --> 00:38:49,600 Speaker 1: of the topics was that we talked about was my 634 00:38:49,960 --> 00:38:52,279 Speaker 1: show and my mom and it's just like, yo, you know, 635 00:38:52,320 --> 00:38:54,720 Speaker 1: I used to be so fucking angry with the things 636 00:38:54,760 --> 00:38:57,759 Speaker 1: that she taught me and the things that I experienced. 637 00:38:57,960 --> 00:38:59,920 Speaker 1: But you know, after going through therapy and stuff and 638 00:39:00,040 --> 00:39:02,839 Speaker 1: just realizing that, you know, you can't fault for something. 639 00:39:02,880 --> 00:39:05,879 Speaker 1: You can't fault somebody for the for what they only had, 640 00:39:05,920 --> 00:39:08,520 Speaker 1: Like she only had a limited amount of resource and 641 00:39:08,600 --> 00:39:11,479 Speaker 1: so she could but what she had. And it took 642 00:39:11,520 --> 00:39:15,480 Speaker 1: me a long time to like understand that. It's like, 643 00:39:15,960 --> 00:39:18,200 Speaker 1: I'm glad now that I have the resources, and I 644 00:39:18,200 --> 00:39:20,560 Speaker 1: do want to take better care of myself mentally because 645 00:39:20,600 --> 00:39:22,600 Speaker 1: I don't want to pass curtin things down to my daughter. 646 00:39:22,960 --> 00:39:25,279 Speaker 1: I don't know how to feel uncomfortable about if you 647 00:39:25,320 --> 00:39:27,480 Speaker 1: want to please yourself when you get to a certain age, 648 00:39:27,640 --> 00:39:29,080 Speaker 1: didn't do it? I whether you do it, then you 649 00:39:29,120 --> 00:39:33,080 Speaker 1: have somebody else do it? Are just loving yourself more? 650 00:39:33,160 --> 00:39:37,279 Speaker 1: You know? Mm hmmm. And I I have also thought 651 00:39:37,280 --> 00:39:39,959 Speaker 1: about that as well, as I get to an age 652 00:39:40,000 --> 00:39:42,080 Speaker 1: where I'm like, okay, girl, we need to start thinking 653 00:39:42,080 --> 00:39:45,200 Speaker 1: about if we're gonna do this parenthood thing or not. 654 00:39:45,840 --> 00:39:50,080 Speaker 1: And I'm like, you know, how am I going to 655 00:39:50,200 --> 00:39:53,680 Speaker 1: address certain things? How am I gonna you know, my 656 00:39:53,800 --> 00:39:56,239 Speaker 1: partner will be like, yo, what if you know, are 657 00:39:56,280 --> 00:39:59,960 Speaker 1: we gonna let our daughter have her boyfriends or whoever 658 00:40:00,520 --> 00:40:02,360 Speaker 1: in the house, and I was like, I'd rather happened 659 00:40:02,360 --> 00:40:04,680 Speaker 1: in the house and out behind some building like I 660 00:40:04,800 --> 00:40:08,000 Speaker 1: used to be, like, listen, okay, I would rather than 661 00:40:08,040 --> 00:40:10,080 Speaker 1: be in a safe space. I would rather be somewhere 662 00:40:10,080 --> 00:40:13,640 Speaker 1: where they have resources and access to you know, safety 663 00:40:13,760 --> 00:40:17,040 Speaker 1: and things like that than to be somewhere get called. 664 00:40:17,440 --> 00:40:19,480 Speaker 1: Now y'all got to sign up on the sex offend 665 00:40:19,480 --> 00:40:21,920 Speaker 1: the list because y'all trying to do stuff in the 666 00:40:22,000 --> 00:40:24,160 Speaker 1: playground in the dark, Like you know what I'm saying, 667 00:40:24,239 --> 00:40:28,759 Speaker 1: Like much rather provide that safe space. And I know 668 00:40:28,840 --> 00:40:31,239 Speaker 1: that that is radical. I know that there are people 669 00:40:31,239 --> 00:40:33,680 Speaker 1: who are like I ain't nobody doing nothing in my 670 00:40:33,800 --> 00:40:36,680 Speaker 1: house but me, And I'm just like, but okay, we 671 00:40:36,680 --> 00:40:39,440 Speaker 1: gotta get past effect of our children go up and 672 00:40:39,480 --> 00:40:44,560 Speaker 1: their sexual beings. It's okay, but times are different. It's different. 673 00:40:44,640 --> 00:40:46,200 Speaker 1: We don't have to we don't have to do this, 674 00:40:46,239 --> 00:40:48,399 Speaker 1: We don't have to be afraid for them. But what 675 00:40:48,440 --> 00:40:51,080 Speaker 1: we can do is teach them. And I would much 676 00:40:51,160 --> 00:40:55,279 Speaker 1: rather that knowledge come from me and from sources that 677 00:40:55,360 --> 00:40:58,480 Speaker 1: can be trusted than their little dumb friends and their 678 00:40:58,520 --> 00:41:02,520 Speaker 1: little dumb boyfriends. And they were like people who don't 679 00:41:02,560 --> 00:41:06,200 Speaker 1: know a durned thing trying to tell my child, you know, 680 00:41:06,320 --> 00:41:08,319 Speaker 1: what to do with their body and what's okay, what's 681 00:41:08,320 --> 00:41:11,400 Speaker 1: not Like I would much rather my child not have 682 00:41:11,520 --> 00:41:15,040 Speaker 1: to get on Google to figure out what's going on. 683 00:41:15,200 --> 00:41:18,600 Speaker 1: So I plan on being very open, very different than 684 00:41:18,640 --> 00:41:22,680 Speaker 1: my parents were, very different than my grandparents worked to 685 00:41:22,800 --> 00:41:26,480 Speaker 1: my mom and I mean, we're just gonna see if 686 00:41:26,480 --> 00:41:33,680 Speaker 1: it don't work, I try now. I want my child 687 00:41:33,719 --> 00:41:36,400 Speaker 1: busting it open now. No, I mean, you know, and 688 00:41:36,600 --> 00:41:42,120 Speaker 1: our conversations you can have around what's you know, respectful 689 00:41:42,160 --> 00:41:45,759 Speaker 1: of your body, respectful of your time, respectful of you know, 690 00:41:45,840 --> 00:41:49,360 Speaker 1: the person that you are. And also if you decided 691 00:41:49,480 --> 00:41:52,359 Speaker 1: that's what you want to do. I don't own you. 692 00:41:52,600 --> 00:41:56,400 Speaker 1: There's nothing that I could do to make you not 693 00:41:56,719 --> 00:41:58,560 Speaker 1: do that. All I can do is arm you with 694 00:41:58,640 --> 00:42:03,800 Speaker 1: information and army with self love and self confidence and 695 00:42:03,840 --> 00:42:06,120 Speaker 1: everything that you need to go out in this world 696 00:42:06,120 --> 00:42:10,719 Speaker 1: and not be you know, led us straight by somebody's 697 00:42:10,800 --> 00:42:16,879 Speaker 1: assy child. So, last, but not least, I think it's 698 00:42:16,880 --> 00:42:20,480 Speaker 1: only right. Did you lead us into a prayer and 699 00:42:20,520 --> 00:42:23,759 Speaker 1: reminding us that the power that we look for sometimes 700 00:42:24,719 --> 00:42:28,600 Speaker 1: is right there between our legs are vaginas. Can you 701 00:42:28,640 --> 00:42:33,760 Speaker 1: please lead us into a prayer. M m okay, who 702 00:42:34,080 --> 00:42:37,440 Speaker 1: I got to pull out my my preacher, my preacher 703 00:42:37,480 --> 00:42:43,560 Speaker 1: had um okay um alright, So first getting honored to 704 00:42:44,040 --> 00:42:48,719 Speaker 1: all of the ancestral mothers, our four mothers, all the 705 00:42:48,760 --> 00:42:52,799 Speaker 1: way back to the first woman who squatted down and 706 00:42:52,880 --> 00:42:57,400 Speaker 1: gave birth to the first person who will populate the world. 707 00:42:57,800 --> 00:43:01,000 Speaker 1: We give thanks. We are our our power. We know 708 00:43:01,080 --> 00:43:04,520 Speaker 1: that that power lives within us. We know that we 709 00:43:04,600 --> 00:43:07,399 Speaker 1: are born from that power, and there's no way for 710 00:43:07,520 --> 00:43:10,319 Speaker 1: us to be let us straight from it. All we 711 00:43:10,400 --> 00:43:13,680 Speaker 1: have to do is tap back in. We give thanks 712 00:43:13,680 --> 00:43:16,080 Speaker 1: to our bodies. We get thanks to our minds. We 713 00:43:16,239 --> 00:43:19,239 Speaker 1: get thanks to our spirits who have brought us here 714 00:43:19,719 --> 00:43:22,919 Speaker 1: and let us down the journey that we're on. Lead 715 00:43:23,000 --> 00:43:25,960 Speaker 1: you to this podcast, lead you to my book, so 716 00:43:26,000 --> 00:43:31,840 Speaker 1: that you can tap back into your natural power. I 717 00:43:31,880 --> 00:43:36,880 Speaker 1: wish for everyone within the sound of my voice, uh, 718 00:43:37,239 --> 00:43:42,120 Speaker 1: like my godmother says, ecstasy, abundance and bliss. I pray 719 00:43:42,200 --> 00:43:46,879 Speaker 1: that you find your power. I pray that you take 720 00:43:46,960 --> 00:43:49,799 Speaker 1: the time to see what your body needs and do 721 00:43:49,880 --> 00:43:52,640 Speaker 1: what it needs, and be consistent with that so that 722 00:43:52,760 --> 00:43:59,319 Speaker 1: you can be your highest self. I share I don't 723 00:43:59,360 --> 00:44:02,879 Speaker 1: know where you are gonna get a prayer like this. Listen, y'all, 724 00:44:02,960 --> 00:44:06,680 Speaker 1: please make sure y'all support my girl pussy prayers, sacred 725 00:44:06,719 --> 00:44:09,400 Speaker 1: and sensual rituals for a wild woman of color. She 726 00:44:09,600 --> 00:44:12,640 Speaker 1: is anonymous, or support her. I'm telling y'all this book 727 00:44:12,680 --> 00:44:14,799 Speaker 1: is really good. I'm gonna have the link in the 728 00:44:14,840 --> 00:44:18,880 Speaker 1: show notes. Um and if you if you have any questions, comments, pscerns, 729 00:44:18,920 --> 00:44:21,160 Speaker 1: and anything, please make sure to email me at hello 730 00:44:21,280 --> 00:44:25,240 Speaker 1: at the pH D podcast dot com. And until next time, guys. 731 00:44:25,719 --> 00:44:26,000 Speaker 1: Later