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Speaker 1: This week at the Parlor Live Comedy Club from right

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Speaker 1: along Brian gallon July thirty first through August second. Twickets

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Speaker 1: are available at Parlor Live dot com or call four

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Speaker 1: two five two eight nine seven thousand. Hello. Hi, this

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Speaker 1: is Seth McElroy. I'm calling from doctor's office. I was

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Speaker 1: looking for Katie. Yeah, this is Katie. Hi Katie, how

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Speaker 1: are you great? Thank you? I see that you're scheduled

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Speaker 1: to come in tomorrow for a consultation regarding some breast augmentation. Yes,

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Speaker 1: I'm excited for you because I can tell you I've

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Speaker 1: seen a lot of women come in here and then

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Speaker 1: they get work done and they leave with so much

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Speaker 1: more confidence. You're gonna love it. Yeah, that's um, that's

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Speaker 1: what I'm moving for. Perfect. I just need to ask

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Speaker 1: you a few questions to get you ready for your

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Speaker 1: consultation tomorrow. Okay, you got a second? Okay, first question,

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Speaker 1: what size are you thinking? I just want to go

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Speaker 1: up one top size kind of cup we're talking about.

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Speaker 1: We're talking about a coffee cup, a tea cup, or

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Speaker 1: a big gulp. You know, it's all the difference on

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Speaker 1: what sort of cup you're dealing with. How big we

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Speaker 1: go right, I want to go from a b to

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Speaker 1: a sea cup. Okay, a sea cup? I got it.

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Speaker 1: What nationality? I'm Aucasian? No, I didn't mean what nationality

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Speaker 1: are you? What nationality do you want your breast to be?

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I don't understand that question. Oh, it's the

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Speaker 1: latest thing in our surgeries. People can request ethnic breasts,

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Speaker 1: like let's say we give you a pair of Swedish

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Speaker 1: ones or Asian breasts if you want, we can do

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Speaker 1: all sorts of I've never heard of anything like that.

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Speaker 1: I have no idea what you're talking about. You know

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Speaker 1: what you sound like? To me? What you sound like

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Speaker 1: an Italian breast type of woman, right, I don't even

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Speaker 1: know what that means. I'll tell you an Italian breast.

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Speaker 1: It's a lot more tan than a normal breast, very full,

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Speaker 1: very solid, very big. They kind of command respect when

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Speaker 1: you go into a room. You know, it's like, hey, child, malla,

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Speaker 1: look at me, that sort of thing. I mean, they

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Speaker 1: don't actually speak like that, but yeah, no, I'm not

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Speaker 1: interested in that, Like I want my breast to match

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Speaker 1: my skin like you. Sure I can't interest you in

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Speaker 1: some Asian breasts. No, I've got a deal on them.

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Speaker 1: Right now, twenty five percent off? Well what isn't what's

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Speaker 1: the deal? All right? I knew you'd listen to that point.

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Speaker 1: And Asian breasts is a lot difference, a lot droopier. Okay,

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Speaker 1: they kind of swoop in and then the nipples touch,

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Speaker 1: like right in the middle of the chest. Are you No,

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Speaker 1: I don't want that. I don't who would want that?

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Speaker 1: Are you serious right now? Oh? Yeah, it's a chic look.

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Speaker 1: A lot of people are doing it these days. So

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Speaker 1: many celebrities have these Asian breasts. It's really a great thing.

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Speaker 1: That's just so weird. I don't even know what to

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Speaker 1: say to that right now, Like, no, I'm not interested

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Speaker 1: in Asian breads. I'm not interested in Italian Like I said,

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Speaker 1: I just want to go off a top side, Like

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Speaker 1: these are really weird questions. So you don't want any

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Speaker 1: ethnicity to your breasts at all? No, I don't. Can

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Speaker 1: I interest you in a refurbished pair? Can I interest

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Speaker 1: you in a refurbished pair? It's cheaper. We'll furbished like

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Speaker 1: they've been used before and somebody else's us. We have

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Speaker 1: a deal worked out with a local mortuary. When somebody

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Speaker 1: with breast implants kicks the bucket. We get those, and

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Speaker 1: we can install those on you for half the price.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, are you kidding me? I'm I'm not

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Speaker 1: kidding you. Not only are they forty percent off, but

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Speaker 1: think of it as going green. It's basically recycling because

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Speaker 1: when they get rid of them, they don't need it anyway.

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Speaker 1: Excuse me, you can just cancel my appointment. I really

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Speaker 1: don't feel comfortable with your question. I'm sorry to hear that.

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Speaker 1: Is it something that we did, Yeah, it's the practices

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Speaker 1: that you have in just this phone call in general,

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Speaker 1: Like I just wanted something simple. Not Italian breasts, not Asian,

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Speaker 1: and not dead people's breasts. That's weird, all right. Well,

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Speaker 1: you sound kind of like a high maintenance client to

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Speaker 1: me at this point, if I'm being honest. Seriously, how

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Speaker 1: many clients have you lost since you've been the one

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Speaker 1: making these phone calls? Oh, we've actually never had a client,

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Speaker 1: not one. What do you mean nobody has ever taken

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Speaker 1: me up on my offer of having a dead person's

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Speaker 1: breast put on them. Never? Well, yeah, obviously. Also because

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Speaker 1: this is actually jewel from Brook and Jewel in the morning,

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Speaker 1: I'm moving ninety two point five doing a phone tap

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Speaker 1: on you. Oh my god, are you serious? Yes? I am. Oh,

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Speaker 1: I'm so confused. I really do you have an appointment?

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Speaker 1: Your brother James set you up. Are you serious? He

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Speaker 1: said that you're going to have your breast in large

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Speaker 1: and wanted me to mess with you a little bit.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god. Sure I can't interest you in a

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Speaker 1: pair of breasts that connect at the nipple. Sure all right?

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Speaker 1: Done every morning with jewel phone taps weekday morning, the

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Speaker 1: two hucks six six moving. I got my eyes on

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Speaker 1: you everything that I see. I won't show high love

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Speaker 1: and emotions and Leslie, I can't get all you