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Speaker 1: Hey, guys, it's Kurt with a late last minute show

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Speaker 1: at I'm gonna be in Philadelphia October thirteenth to the

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Speaker 1: fifteenth at Helium Philly. I'm coming back. It's gonna be fun.

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Speaker 1: I'm doing stand up. We just added these dates, so

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Speaker 1: come out and see me. You know, it'll be a

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Speaker 1: very fantastic time link in the bio and all that

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Speaker 1: sort of thing. You know what I'm talking about? Am I?

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Speaker 2: Oh, cretty bee? I think I'll start this one.

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Speaker 1: You know, I love these days. It's just like a

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Speaker 1: little vacation.

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Speaker 2: It is like a little vacation. Here we go. This

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Speaker 2: alarm clock inside a living room wall has been ringing

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Speaker 2: for thirteen years.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god. That is my total nightmare. So all right,

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Speaker 1: the clock is ticking and it's time to rise and

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Speaker 1: shine for a brand new episode of but Ananas.

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Speaker 2: Don't world understand?

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Speaker 1: Would you mind tzillion pieces?

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Speaker 2: Would you.

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Speaker 1: Ende? Guys, guys, non binary pals, Welcome to Bananas. I

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Speaker 1: am sitting in the same room as a man they

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Speaker 1: call Scottie.

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Speaker 2: Land, that is right, And I'm sitting in the one

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Speaker 2: and one Kurt Brown Owlder's garage. We're recording in person

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Speaker 2: for maybe the fifth time besides our live shows.

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Speaker 1: Ever, this is, this is strange, It is strange. This

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Speaker 1: is I haven't been not on stage recording a podcast

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Speaker 1: with you since maybe like March eighth, twenty twenty.

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Speaker 2: Pretty wild, but also eventually exactly right. It's going to

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Speaker 2: have a studio and all of our you and me

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Speaker 2: is all the solo epis that the bananimals just love.

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Speaker 2: We'll be in person and so handy and make our

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Speaker 2: lives so lovely.

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Speaker 1: I do feel like we don't know where to look.

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Speaker 2: We're used to looking at screens. Well, also in life,

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Speaker 2: grown men don't look at each other when they talk

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Speaker 2: to each other. That's why we go fishing and play

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Speaker 2: golf and stuff.

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Speaker 1: As we can look out at something. And I do, yeah,

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Speaker 1: like at a party, I do like a game that

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Speaker 1: I can just like little play game. We can continue

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Speaker 1: to talk while I play the game.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, we played a game once at your old place

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Speaker 2: when you were living with Orrin and yeah, Yea and

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Speaker 2: all those guys that it was like a party and

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Speaker 2: nobody was communicating and you were definitely there, but it

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Speaker 2: was in the kitchen. I just put a ladle, a

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Speaker 2: soup ladle on the ground and we invented a game

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Speaker 2: called Cork and Ladele where he stood across the room

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Speaker 2: with wine corks and you had to toss him and

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Speaker 2: try to land him in the ladlespoon. And it went

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Speaker 2: from like what is this idiot doing to five or

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Speaker 2: six people competitively playing cork and Ladele. So shout out

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Speaker 2: to all the cork and ladle heads out there on

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Speaker 2: the soup heads.

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Speaker 1: I'm happy we're in the same space for this right now, Scotty,

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Speaker 1: because I have a very exciting announced.

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Speaker 2: Oh good, tell me.

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Speaker 1: So, remember do you remember going to Denver? I love

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Speaker 1: Denver and I recorded a new special.

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Speaker 2: I remember that. Well, the theater was great. You had

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Speaker 2: multiple Charlie fromages I did.

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Speaker 1: August twenty August of twenty one, you recorded it, that

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Speaker 1: is when I recorded it, And it's finally coming out.

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Speaker 2: It's a big deal.

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Speaker 1: It's coming out starting right now when you're listening to this.

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Speaker 1: October seventh, it went on presale. Okay, you can watch

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Speaker 1: it at moment dot co. So if you go to

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Speaker 1: moment dot co, I'm up there right now.

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Speaker 2: Oh cool.

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Speaker 1: It is a place. So it'll just be live online

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Speaker 1: for two weeks. Oh and watch it it's ten dollars

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Speaker 1: if you buy the pre sale amazing twelve bucks if

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Speaker 1: you get it day of fantastic. It's coming out October

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Speaker 1: twenty seventh, and I couldn't be more excited.

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Speaker 2: Well, I couldn't be more excited. And as I recall,

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Speaker 2: you did two tapings and there were a lot of

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Speaker 2: an animals there. There were a lot of people in

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Speaker 2: bananas costumes there. That was like fresh out of the

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Speaker 2: That was when people were like creeping back out into

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Speaker 2: the world post grade Koar. And it was fun. That

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Speaker 2: was a lively one.

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Speaker 1: We actually like slid right in right before Omicron when

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Speaker 1: everyone had already like either gotten it or been vacke. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: I don't even the og.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, the og. Well that's so exciting. Are you excited?

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Speaker 1: I can't wait. I'm very proud of this hour.

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Speaker 2: It's so good.

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Speaker 1: I think it's got a full like it has an

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Speaker 1: emotional reason for existence. This it does also at the

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Speaker 1: same time being very heavy with jokes.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I was packed. It was a full hour,

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Speaker 2: There's no doubt about it. I'm sure you had to cut.

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Speaker 2: And Jonah Ray directed it, right.

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Speaker 1: Jonah Ray directed it.

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Speaker 2: That's right.

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Speaker 1: You might hear some crying. That's Zelda. Yes, in our constant,

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Speaker 1: normal state of crying about something that I don't.

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Speaker 2: Know, first time recording with a dog in our presence.

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Speaker 2: I had an incredible morning, you did. I was driving

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Speaker 2: to go to the bank. I still go to the bank.

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Speaker 2: People say, why don't you take a photo of your

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Speaker 2: check or whatever you.

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Speaker 1: Go inside the bank?

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Speaker 2: No, the drive.

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Speaker 1: I enjoy the drive for me too.

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Speaker 2: I like a little errand.

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Speaker 1: I still I wish they still had the tube, attic.

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Speaker 2: Tubes, the speed tube. At where my parents went in

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Speaker 2: Maryland when I was a kid, I think it was

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Speaker 2: Susquehanna Bank. They would be like, oh, you have a

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Speaker 2: kid in the car. Now, what's a normal food to

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Speaker 2: send to a child at a bank, right, flat lollipops

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Speaker 2: that classic flat green, red, orange, yellow lollipops.

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Speaker 1: And a pneumatic tube.

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Speaker 2: Well not at Susquehanna Bank. They sent pretzel rods. So

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Speaker 2: if at best you got one broken in half at normalists,

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Speaker 2: just pieces of pretzel flying out of your mom's cash sleeve.

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Speaker 1: That's so funny. So also the idea, because you know

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Speaker 1: it was motivated by one person high up at the

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Speaker 1: bank who's like, these kids having too much sugar. Give

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Speaker 1: them pretzel.

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Speaker 2: Also, I love a Snyder's of hanover pretzel rod, but

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Speaker 2: not at ninety five miles an hour in a U

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Speaker 2: shaped tube that smashes to a stop at the bottom.

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Speaker 2: So anyways, I'm going to the bank in Outwater and

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Speaker 2: I'm on Riverside and I passed the Oscar Meyer wienermobile.

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Speaker 2: I put two videos in the stories because it's so

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Speaker 2: rare to see.

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Speaker 1: Though, it's very rare to see it.

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Speaker 2: And so I whipped a U turn, a totally illegal

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Speaker 2: U turn on Riverside. As I'm whipping the U turn,

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Speaker 2: I noticed a California Highway Patrol Chips motorcycle cop already

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Speaker 2: writing a ticket to somebody. And he looks at me,

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Speaker 2: like you lucky bastard, and I just gave him like

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Speaker 2: a nod, like.

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Speaker 1: Seal, I'm kind of go to the Oscar Meyer Wiener mobile.

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Speaker 2: Sorry, Copper, I'm chasing a Wiener And I caught up

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Speaker 2: to it, and I followed it for a stalking amount

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Speaker 2: of time, probably two or three minutes, because the music

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Speaker 2: kept getting better on serious XM, where I was just

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Speaker 2: like cracking up. It was like an outcast song. And

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Speaker 2: then it was like a new wave song. And I

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Speaker 2: just kept recording this thing and I realized that, you know,

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Speaker 2: one it was my dream. I did out to them

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Speaker 2: and applied and I didn't get it in twenty twenty,

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Speaker 2: but it is. It makes you happy when you see

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Speaker 2: the wienermobile. It makes you so happy.

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Speaker 1: So I have a question for you, since you've seen

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Speaker 1: it in person, where like, how much does the Wiener

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Speaker 1: where they sit come out past where the seemingly wheel parts?

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Speaker 2: Right? Great question, Well articulated.

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Speaker 1: They sell where the wheel parts.

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Speaker 2: They drive in one tip, so the drivers are in

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Speaker 2: the front tip and then there's some windows on the side,

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Speaker 2: but then the back there's probably three or four foot

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Speaker 2: of Wiener hanging off the back for real. Yeah, I'm

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Speaker 2: probably three feet so it's pretty compact.

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Speaker 1: The driver is the driver is over the wheels.

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Speaker 2: Absolutely, the driver is over the wheels at the front

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Speaker 2: tip of the Wiener. It was great, just like it.

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Speaker 2: I was like, this is the greatest promotion of all time.

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Speaker 2: I sent it to When I put it in the story,

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Speaker 2: people were responding like what is this? And I was like,

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Speaker 2: how don't you know what this is? This A couple

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Speaker 2: Canadian b animals had no idea. What the Wienermobile was?

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Speaker 2: Oh the Canadian, so I said, I said, that's the Wienermobile.

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Speaker 1: It's amobile, of course it is.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. Anyways, it was a great start to my day.

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Speaker 2: When you see a giant driving wienermobile before ten am,

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Speaker 2: You're having a day, a great day. And then you

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Speaker 2: were like do you were one? To recording person, I'm like, hell, yeah, dog,

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Speaker 2: all right, let's do it. Let's get into one. This

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Speaker 2: is from Issa Cormier. This was in Vice magazine, Vice

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Speaker 2: dot com, written by River Donahey.

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Speaker 1: Oh, River Donahey. You know some people say from Vice

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Speaker 1: dot com, then River donahe is the best.

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Speaker 2: I have heard this. This alarm clock inside a living

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Speaker 2: room wall has been ringing for thirteen years.

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Speaker 1: Wow.

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Speaker 2: Wow. It goes off once a night, every night forever.

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Speaker 1: And I'm just I'm admiring. Yes, the battery craft, it'smanship. Yes,

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Speaker 1: thirteen years, Yes, bring me once a.

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Speaker 2: Night, NonStop. And also, is this a practical joke? What

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Speaker 2: has happened here? Let's find out. A family in Ross Township,

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Speaker 2: Pennsylvania has been living with an alarm clock routinely ringing

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Speaker 2: inside the wall of their home since two thousand and four.

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Speaker 3: Wow. Wow.

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Speaker 2: Wow. CBS Pittsburgh reported this. They've been patiently waiting for

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Speaker 2: the clock's battery to run down ever since, oh ever

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Speaker 2: since Janet Jackson's boob was mainstream news. Okay, reever you

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Speaker 2: lost us with that bud. Could be a guy, could

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Speaker 2: be a guy, could could be them that we don't

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Speaker 2: know about river maybe mediums and abyss, But so far

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Speaker 2: it's been going strong. A guy named Jerry Lynn is

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Speaker 2: responsible for said clock being stuck behind said wall.

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Speaker 1: Well they actually know, Okay, I'm so excited, keep.

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Speaker 2: Going, as he and his wife have been living with

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Speaker 2: this incessantly beeping mistake ever since. Lynn explained on Thursday

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Speaker 2: that he dropped the alarm clock down through a second

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Speaker 2: story airvent tied to a string, hoping that the hoping

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Speaker 2: that it sound would help him figure out where to

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Speaker 2: drill a hole for his TV cable.

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Speaker 1: Oh that's the weirdest way to do that. Yeah, the

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Speaker 1: craziest way to you don't have a stud finder.

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Speaker 2: But I know, or just take a chance, take a chance.

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Speaker 1: But also.

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Speaker 2: Also to do that, to do that, to go, I'm

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Speaker 2: going to send my little sonar system down. I'm going

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Speaker 2: to listen through the wall where it goes the number

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Speaker 2: one skill you need to have not tying. You need

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Speaker 2: to be able to tie a good knot. Unfortunately, Lynn's

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Speaker 2: household ingenuity didn't extend to not tying. The clock slipped

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Speaker 2: from its harness and fell into the wall's abyss quote.

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Speaker 2: All of a sudden, I heard it go thunk and

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Speaker 2: the clock came loose. Lynn told CBS. I thought, well,

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Speaker 2: that's not a real problem. It's still going to go off,

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Speaker 2: and then it did. That's a weird way to say it.

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Speaker 2: I think he was saying, it's not a real problem

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Speaker 2: because it's gonna go off for a little bit. But

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Speaker 2: then it kept going forever. It continued to go off

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Speaker 2: every evening inside his living room wall forever. Lynn figured

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Speaker 2: that maybe three or four months it'll run out of battery,

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Speaker 2: but the clock has since lived on. During daylight Savings time,

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Speaker 2: it goes off at ten minutes until eight o'clock, So

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Speaker 2: that's like, I guess that's okay, that's better than three am.

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Speaker 1: That is the best time for it to go right.

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Speaker 2: During standard time, it goes off ten minutes to seven o'clock.

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Speaker 1: So his plan was to drop it into the wall,

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Speaker 1: run down the stairs, and then wait for eight ten

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Speaker 1: to come. Yeah, and then listen to the wall.

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Speaker 2: I guess we know what time he was gonna drill

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Speaker 2: that cable wire. He was trying to catch some musty TV.

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Speaker 2: It's not clear what brand of alarm clock was trapped

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Speaker 2: inside the wall. Unfortunately, since the clock's thirteen year battery

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Speaker 2: life would have made a great campaign for Tashiba or

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Speaker 2: whatever or whatever. Come on river, tighten up over there.

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Speaker 1: So Tish was not going to be my first go

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Speaker 1: to for an alarm clock.

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Speaker 2: No, I don't even know anymore. But there was that

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Speaker 2: one brand that we all had.

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Speaker 1: It was a digital alarm clock and eight numbers.

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Speaker 2: Yeah bnie.

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Speaker 1: I was a Sony.

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Speaker 2: It must have been a Sony.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you're talking about big flat face and from the

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Speaker 1: like late nineties.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, there was that one. And then there was a

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Speaker 2: flat one that fake wood paneling over it. That was

250
00:12:22,360 --> 00:12:24,960
Speaker 2: digital too, and I think that was a clock radio.

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Speaker 2: But anyways, now everybody looks at their phone, even before

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Speaker 2: the alarm goes off. Everybody just gets up and looks

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Speaker 2: at their phone.

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Speaker 1: I started wearing during the pandemic. I started wearing a

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Speaker 1: just a normal watch, just a regular dumb watch. And

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Speaker 1: I loved it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you're back.

258
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Speaker 1: You're into the watchlock, back into the watch life.

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Speaker 2: Oh that's cool. And for all the ban animals out

260
00:12:45,840 --> 00:12:49,280
Speaker 2: there laughing and screaming at their speakers. Yes, Lynn could

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00:12:49,320 --> 00:12:51,920
Speaker 2: have probably cut into the drywall and taken care of

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Speaker 2: this nuisance long ago. But he and his wife apparently

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00:12:54,480 --> 00:12:58,200
Speaker 2: have come to terms. But they're sometimes beeping home and

264
00:12:58,240 --> 00:13:00,160
Speaker 2: then there's a link to something else. That's a His

265
00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:02,800
Speaker 2: homeowners have been known to deal with worse, and that

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Speaker 2: is true. Of course that's true.

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Speaker 1: It's not black mold.

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Speaker 2: I would have guessed it would have run out in

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Speaker 2: a year. I can understand what they were thinking. But

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Speaker 2: it's been like eighteen years or something, thirteen years. It's

271
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Speaker 2: been crazy. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So every morning my across the street neighbor, you can

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Speaker 1: almost see their house.

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Speaker 2: Wait.

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Speaker 1: Uh, he sleeps with his windows open, and he has

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Speaker 1: an alarm clock. And I know recently that he got

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Speaker 1: a new alarm clock because he then disappears, okay for

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Speaker 1: days at a time, leaves the window open, yeah, and

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Speaker 1: doesn't turn the alarm off.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So from about six am till like eight am, it's

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Speaker 1: just the same alarm. And it used to be like yeah, man,

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00:13:52,640 --> 00:13:56,440
Speaker 1: which is very annoying. He got a new maybe six

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Speaker 1: months ago, so now it's just like Blu Lulu.

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Speaker 2: Boy.

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Speaker 1: It is such and it's it's just because you just

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00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:07,680
Speaker 1: hear it as you're like walking down the street and

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00:14:07,720 --> 00:14:10,199
Speaker 1: it's just like he leaves. I'm assuming he leaves other

289
00:14:10,240 --> 00:14:13,280
Speaker 1: than that, or or he's completely unconscious in his bed.

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00:14:13,679 --> 00:14:15,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, the hardest sleeper ever.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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00:14:16,880 --> 00:14:19,320
Speaker 2: When I was when I was a young, a young

293
00:14:19,400 --> 00:14:26,720
Speaker 2: banana at Camp Camp poot Talk, the greatest campground in Monkton, Maryland.

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Speaker 1: We all of the words are weird.

295
00:14:29,160 --> 00:14:31,720
Speaker 2: I know, Monkedon is actually so beautiful. But I was

296
00:14:31,760 --> 00:14:35,160
Speaker 2: at Camp poot Talk and I lived in the tepee encampment,

297
00:14:35,240 --> 00:14:38,320
Speaker 2: which we had to build on day one. Set up.

298
00:14:38,320 --> 00:14:41,520
Speaker 2: The tepee so huge, so it sleeps three cots. There's

299
00:14:41,520 --> 00:14:43,880
Speaker 2: a little fire. You were allowed of a fire. It's yeah.

300
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Speaker 2: When I was like ten or eleven or twelve, probably eleven,

301
00:14:47,680 --> 00:14:51,280
Speaker 2: but when there were huge thunderstorms, they would be like, guys,

302
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Speaker 2: seal up the TP We're gonna go sleep in the chapel.

303
00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:55,920
Speaker 2: So there was like a little chapel that I don't

304
00:14:55,920 --> 00:14:57,560
Speaker 2: even know what was for. So one night we do

305
00:14:57,600 --> 00:15:00,400
Speaker 2: that and it's guys and girls and we're all having

306
00:15:00,480 --> 00:15:03,800
Speaker 2: so much fun. And I stepped back and all one

307
00:15:03,880 --> 00:15:06,040
Speaker 2: the sleeping bags and I heard a crunch. And then

308
00:15:06,120 --> 00:15:09,000
Speaker 2: later on this camp counselor named Joe, who is the best.

309
00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:11,920
Speaker 2: He was like a really nice guy, older guy came

310
00:15:11,960 --> 00:15:15,480
Speaker 2: in and he's like, who broke my travel alarm clock?

311
00:15:16,000 --> 00:15:18,360
Speaker 2: And I didn't fess up and nobody did, and it

312
00:15:18,400 --> 00:15:20,440
Speaker 2: was clearly me. I knew it was me, and I

313
00:15:20,520 --> 00:15:22,640
Speaker 2: was like, yeah, I was like eleven years old. It

314
00:15:22,720 --> 00:15:24,520
Speaker 2: was on a sleeping bag and pillows. But we were

315
00:15:24,560 --> 00:15:26,520
Speaker 2: all just like running around goofing off and flirting and

316
00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:27,880
Speaker 2: being kids.

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00:15:27,920 --> 00:15:30,520
Speaker 1: But I just didn't fess upright, so because you knew

318
00:15:30,560 --> 00:15:31,520
Speaker 1: you could not be caught.

319
00:15:31,600 --> 00:15:34,080
Speaker 2: It was definitely me. Nobody saw it and we heard it.

320
00:15:34,160 --> 00:15:36,840
Speaker 2: I felt it on my foot more than anything. So

321
00:15:37,520 --> 00:15:40,760
Speaker 2: but then Joe is like, who is it who did this?

322
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Speaker 2: And nobody fessed up and he's like this, like I've

323
00:15:43,320 --> 00:15:46,840
Speaker 2: traveled with this for like ten years like this, I

324
00:15:46,880 --> 00:15:48,760
Speaker 2: really liked this thing, like it meant a lot and

325
00:15:48,800 --> 00:15:50,960
Speaker 2: I could see it. And then suddenly I was so

326
00:15:51,160 --> 00:15:54,520
Speaker 2: overwhelmed with gil. I was like shit, So everybody lays

327
00:15:54,520 --> 00:15:57,960
Speaker 2: down to go to sleep, and it's raining thunderstorms, and

328
00:15:58,040 --> 00:16:00,040
Speaker 2: I'm lying awake because I'm a kid, and I I

329
00:16:00,120 --> 00:16:01,400
Speaker 2: knew i'd done something wrong.

330
00:16:01,560 --> 00:16:02,760
Speaker 1: Well, and now you're going to hell.

331
00:16:03,080 --> 00:16:07,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I'm surrounded by really like funny, weird kids

332
00:16:07,560 --> 00:16:11,040
Speaker 2: from all over Maryland, Pennsylvania, and they're all snoring and

333
00:16:11,120 --> 00:16:13,480
Speaker 2: sleeping and being kids, and I am just guiltrin and

334
00:16:13,560 --> 00:16:16,200
Speaker 2: I'm like, I need to say something. So in the

335
00:16:16,200 --> 00:16:18,120
Speaker 2: middle of the night, when the rain finally stops, I

336
00:16:18,200 --> 00:16:19,840
Speaker 2: venture out and I don't know what time it is,

337
00:16:19,880 --> 00:16:22,080
Speaker 2: but probably two or three in the morning, and I'm

338
00:16:22,120 --> 00:16:24,880
Speaker 2: looking for Joe. The rain has stopped, and I see

339
00:16:25,000 --> 00:16:27,000
Speaker 2: him sitting in the camp truck, which was like a

340
00:16:27,040 --> 00:16:31,120
Speaker 2: pickup truck. Clearly he had been smoking joints, clearly as

341
00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:35,640
Speaker 2: high as a Georgia pine. He was in. The truck

342
00:16:35,680 --> 00:16:38,040
Speaker 2: was called the Enforcer cause it was just rust and

343
00:16:38,120 --> 00:16:41,120
Speaker 2: it barely held together, but it never died. And he

344
00:16:41,160 --> 00:16:43,640
Speaker 2: saw me coming and as soon as I started talking,

345
00:16:43,640 --> 00:16:45,480
Speaker 2: I started crying because I was a little kidd and

346
00:16:45,480 --> 00:16:47,440
Speaker 2: I was like, Joe, is me. I broke your alarm

347
00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:50,440
Speaker 2: clock and He's like, hey, okay, and I was like,

348
00:16:50,480 --> 00:16:53,480
Speaker 2: I'm so sorry. It was an accident. He goes, okay, okay,

349
00:16:53,520 --> 00:16:56,680
Speaker 2: and like again just reeking of weed. Yeah anyway, but.

350
00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:59,080
Speaker 1: You didn't at that time, like you just knew he

351
00:16:59,240 --> 00:17:04,399
Speaker 1: smelt funny, right, Yeah, I didn't know it. No, yeah, yeah, yeah,

352
00:17:04,400 --> 00:17:05,040
Speaker 1: but I don't know what.

353
00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:11,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was one of those smells. And so he's like,

354
00:17:12,080 --> 00:17:15,240
Speaker 2: tomorrow we need to make this right. And I'm like,

355
00:17:15,320 --> 00:17:17,480
Speaker 2: what the hell does that mean? You know, this is

356
00:17:17,520 --> 00:17:19,840
Speaker 2: a grown man talking to an eleven year old in

357
00:17:19,880 --> 00:17:23,000
Speaker 2: the wet woods at two am, after admitting his guilt.

358
00:17:23,119 --> 00:17:25,440
Speaker 2: And I was like okay, and he goes, we need

359
00:17:25,480 --> 00:17:28,520
Speaker 2: to do a sweat lodge, and I go okay. I

360
00:17:28,520 --> 00:17:31,719
Speaker 2: didn't know what that meant. So the next morning we

361
00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:34,160
Speaker 2: all went to lunch and every our breakfast, and then

362
00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:37,359
Speaker 2: Joe came over and there were a few Native American

363
00:17:37,480 --> 00:17:40,560
Speaker 2: counselors there, and he was like, come on, Scotti and

364
00:17:40,640 --> 00:17:43,000
Speaker 2: we walked out just shower into the woods and they

365
00:17:43,040 --> 00:17:44,800
Speaker 2: had a sweat lodge that they had built with a

366
00:17:45,080 --> 00:17:46,800
Speaker 2: like a four like a six person ten with a

367
00:17:46,800 --> 00:17:48,520
Speaker 2: bunch of tarps over it, and we all crawl in.

368
00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:51,359
Speaker 2: He's like bring a swimsuit and like five of us

369
00:17:51,400 --> 00:17:53,720
Speaker 2: get in there and they just somebody a shovel comes

370
00:17:53,720 --> 00:17:55,600
Speaker 2: in with like a glowing red rock and lowers it

371
00:17:55,640 --> 00:17:57,639
Speaker 2: down and they start steaming and putting sage on it

372
00:17:57,680 --> 00:18:00,399
Speaker 2: and all these things. And then Joe just forgave me,

373
00:18:00,720 --> 00:18:02,879
Speaker 2: and the other old counselors told me it was okay,

374
00:18:02,920 --> 00:18:05,000
Speaker 2: and then we sat in there for thirty five minutes

375
00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:06,760
Speaker 2: forty minutes, then ran and jumped in the pool and

376
00:18:06,760 --> 00:18:08,800
Speaker 2: he's like, it's all good now, it's all fine, and

377
00:18:08,840 --> 00:18:10,800
Speaker 2: he let me go and he never bought it up again.

378
00:18:10,920 --> 00:18:13,800
Speaker 2: And I thought it was like the nicest way, but

379
00:18:13,880 --> 00:18:15,560
Speaker 2: he was like, we just have to make this right,

380
00:18:15,960 --> 00:18:18,399
Speaker 2: and so we sweated it out and he forgave me

381
00:18:18,440 --> 00:18:19,280
Speaker 2: in front of others.

382
00:18:19,680 --> 00:18:22,200
Speaker 1: Wow, Wow, what a crazy story.

383
00:18:22,320 --> 00:18:24,760
Speaker 2: It was nice though. Yeah, I I had forgotten it

384
00:18:24,880 --> 00:18:26,640
Speaker 2: and then when I saw this, I was like, yeah,

385
00:18:26,640 --> 00:18:29,040
Speaker 2: I did break that, and it was just like a

386
00:18:29,200 --> 00:18:31,480
Speaker 2: nice thing to do. He could have been like, your

387
00:18:31,480 --> 00:18:33,760
Speaker 2: parents are gonna buy me a new one, or you're

388
00:18:33,800 --> 00:18:36,960
Speaker 2: gonna stack firewood tomorrow. Instead he was like, let's do

389
00:18:37,040 --> 00:18:39,880
Speaker 2: the most chill thing ever. Yeah, it just sweat out

390
00:18:39,920 --> 00:18:40,560
Speaker 2: these blues.

391
00:18:40,680 --> 00:18:43,080
Speaker 1: Oh so what a pleasant What a pleasant way to

392
00:18:43,560 --> 00:18:45,359
Speaker 1: in his mind, he was just like I got an

393
00:18:45,440 --> 00:18:48,200
Speaker 1: excuse to ghost take a nice sweat tomorrow.

394
00:18:48,320 --> 00:18:50,240
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's right, he told the head of the camp.

395
00:18:50,320 --> 00:18:54,320
Speaker 2: He's like, Sorr, I got to handle something huge because to.

396
00:18:54,240 --> 00:18:57,280
Speaker 1: Me it doesn't seem like a huge infraction to you

397
00:18:57,320 --> 00:18:57,920
Speaker 1: as a child.

398
00:18:58,080 --> 00:19:00,080
Speaker 2: Yeah, I felt guilty because I lied too.

399
00:19:00,320 --> 00:19:02,440
Speaker 1: Right, because you lied to I guess maybe that was

400
00:19:02,480 --> 00:19:04,880
Speaker 1: it too as well. Where it's just like here camp,

401
00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:07,159
Speaker 1: we need to keep the keep the code of honor.

402
00:19:07,320 --> 00:19:08,040
Speaker 2: It is strong.

403
00:19:08,440 --> 00:19:10,720
Speaker 1: Was it at Long sleep Away Camp?

404
00:19:10,840 --> 00:19:13,240
Speaker 2: It was a week. You could do a week or

405
00:19:13,280 --> 00:19:16,480
Speaker 2: two weeks. But yes, I'm not Jewish, so my parents

406
00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:19,400
Speaker 2: did not send me away for four weeks to eight weeks,

407
00:19:19,640 --> 00:19:22,119
Speaker 2: which all my other friends did. They were just gone

408
00:19:22,280 --> 00:19:24,400
Speaker 2: and then their parents were just party like hell its

409
00:19:25,359 --> 00:19:27,960
Speaker 2: Camp Air and Camp Looise. Those were the two big ones.

410
00:19:28,040 --> 00:19:31,400
Speaker 1: I can't wait. Yeah, yeah, I can't wait to send

411
00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:33,800
Speaker 1: my kids to camp. Yeah, I gotta find a good one.

412
00:19:34,280 --> 00:19:35,200
Speaker 1: Are you ready for one?

413
00:19:35,280 --> 00:19:36,960
Speaker 2: I would love it?

414
00:19:38,040 --> 00:19:41,879
Speaker 1: Gold Coast Woman has last laugh at her own funeral.

415
00:19:42,600 --> 00:19:45,000
Speaker 2: Oh good, So that's the way to do it.

416
00:19:45,040 --> 00:19:48,399
Speaker 1: We've had we've had funeral pranks before, and I do

417
00:19:48,480 --> 00:19:51,520
Speaker 1: and appreciate me too. And this one's great. This one

418
00:19:51,560 --> 00:19:53,960
Speaker 1: was sent by Nathan Edwards. Thank you so much, Nathan.

419
00:19:55,000 --> 00:19:59,440
Speaker 1: It was in the old classic Scotty loves this website.

420
00:19:59,480 --> 00:20:00,800
Speaker 1: Oh yea talking about it?

421
00:20:00,880 --> 00:20:03,400
Speaker 2: Tenplay I love tenplay dot com.

422
00:20:03,480 --> 00:20:13,479
Speaker 1: Tenplay dot com written by Oh come on, tenplay, no author,

423
00:20:13,600 --> 00:20:17,520
Speaker 1: not even not even a place where a byeline could go.

424
00:20:17,760 --> 00:20:19,159
Speaker 2: That's how good tenplay is.

425
00:20:19,440 --> 00:20:20,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, tenplay.

426
00:20:20,560 --> 00:20:21,560
Speaker 2: It speaks for itself.

427
00:20:21,560 --> 00:20:24,680
Speaker 1: We play it ten times. We don't give credit. pH

428
00:20:24,880 --> 00:20:29,040
Speaker 1: gold Coast. I what. I don't know if this is

429
00:20:29,119 --> 00:20:31,480
Speaker 1: a Australian way of saying things, but I'm just gonna

430
00:20:31,520 --> 00:20:35,760
Speaker 1: start in here we go. Gold Coast identity and much

431
00:20:35,840 --> 00:20:41,160
Speaker 1: loved businesswoman Michelle Newman was farewelled by friends okay, family

432
00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:44,840
Speaker 1: after losing her battle with cancer. Sad but a strange

433
00:20:44,840 --> 00:20:49,080
Speaker 1: sentence farewell, farewelled, Yeah okay. Newman, known for her wicked

434
00:20:49,119 --> 00:20:51,560
Speaker 1: sense of humor, treated mourners to one last prank in

435
00:20:51,600 --> 00:20:54,040
Speaker 1: the day of her funeral. Great mourners look to the

436
00:20:54,040 --> 00:20:57,440
Speaker 1: sky to see a light plane flying over the service,

437
00:20:57,560 --> 00:21:01,160
Speaker 1: towing a banner that read I'm watching you cry harder.

438
00:21:01,880 --> 00:21:06,119
Speaker 2: Oh that's good, that's good, concise, really good. Wow. She

439
00:21:06,160 --> 00:21:07,480
Speaker 2: had a great sense of humor.

440
00:21:07,480 --> 00:21:11,239
Speaker 1: Right, and everyone was like, oh, that's classic, Michelle. They

441
00:21:11,280 --> 00:21:15,200
Speaker 1: described their mother as a strong, quick quitted, and savvy strong, quick, quitted,

442
00:21:15,200 --> 00:21:18,040
Speaker 1: and savvy business absolutely will always be remembered as a

443
00:21:18,040 --> 00:21:20,840
Speaker 1: loving and affectionate socialite. She had a wicked sense of

444
00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:24,439
Speaker 1: humor and a laugh that would fill the room. She

445
00:21:24,520 --> 00:21:27,240
Speaker 1: was a practical, practical joker, acted like a teenager among

446
00:21:27,280 --> 00:21:30,399
Speaker 1: her friends, and lived life to the full weather be skiing, surfing,

447
00:21:30,480 --> 00:21:33,480
Speaker 1: jet skiing, or hiking. Calls had a fond love for cooking,

448
00:21:33,520 --> 00:21:37,160
Speaker 1: as well as cryptic trivia and Sudoku puzzles.

449
00:21:37,200 --> 00:21:39,640
Speaker 2: She really sounds like the coolest person I ever liked.

450
00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:43,360
Speaker 2: I mean Banana the week for sure. What you just

451
00:21:43,359 --> 00:21:46,560
Speaker 2: described my bito is going to be like lived life

452
00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:48,680
Speaker 2: fifty percent to the fullest.

453
00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:53,160
Speaker 1: Surfing, jet skiing, hiking. This is a person who would

454
00:21:53,160 --> 00:21:56,680
Speaker 1: I would get along with very absolutely. The Australians they

455
00:21:57,000 --> 00:21:59,880
Speaker 1: come different. M I love that so much.

456
00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:00,520
Speaker 2: What would you?

457
00:22:01,200 --> 00:22:03,280
Speaker 1: I feel like? You told me once that you wanted

458
00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:06,480
Speaker 1: your funeral to be you buried up.

459
00:22:06,720 --> 00:22:10,119
Speaker 2: Just ass up my head underground like an ostrich and

460
00:22:10,160 --> 00:22:13,080
Speaker 2: then prop my body into downward dog and then everybody

461
00:22:13,119 --> 00:22:16,080
Speaker 2: can kiss or kick my ass or slap my ass.

462
00:22:15,840 --> 00:22:20,119
Speaker 1: That's actually a good headstone. Yeah, you should get started

463
00:22:20,160 --> 00:22:25,200
Speaker 1: on it. Sure, you gotta find somebody, because to find

464
00:22:25,240 --> 00:22:28,359
Speaker 1: someone who I wonder if a Yeah, you got to

465
00:22:28,359 --> 00:22:30,679
Speaker 1: find a cemetery that will allow you to have that

466
00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:31,400
Speaker 1: type of headstone.

467
00:22:31,440 --> 00:22:31,960
Speaker 2: That'd be great.

468
00:22:32,160 --> 00:22:34,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, because you don't want your rotting pants out in

469
00:22:34,040 --> 00:22:34,440
Speaker 1: the suner.

470
00:22:34,600 --> 00:22:36,680
Speaker 2: No, I would do want to be cremated or turned

471
00:22:36,680 --> 00:22:40,000
Speaker 2: into a tree. I think that would be cool. Or

472
00:22:41,280 --> 00:22:43,520
Speaker 2: I used to joke that I wanted my right hand

473
00:22:43,840 --> 00:22:46,600
Speaker 2: bronze so that people would they would come in they

474
00:22:46,600 --> 00:22:49,280
Speaker 2: would have to shake my hand before entering wherever whoever,

475
00:22:49,359 --> 00:22:51,399
Speaker 2: whatever family member kept that so they'd be like, you

476
00:22:51,400 --> 00:22:53,240
Speaker 2: want to shake Uncle Scotti's hand, and then you just

477
00:22:53,280 --> 00:22:54,960
Speaker 2: have to shake my hand before the ghost to me

478
00:22:54,960 --> 00:22:55,720
Speaker 2: haunts you forever.

479
00:22:57,760 --> 00:22:59,920
Speaker 1: But yeah, and then you would be in the hand.

480
00:23:00,280 --> 00:23:02,119
Speaker 1: That would be great. If like your if your ashes

481
00:23:02,119 --> 00:23:02,720
Speaker 1: were in the hand.

482
00:23:02,760 --> 00:23:06,240
Speaker 2: Oh, that's a cool idea. I had a roommatos I

483
00:23:06,240 --> 00:23:08,520
Speaker 2: think it might have been zaying my crazy roommate once

484
00:23:08,880 --> 00:23:11,680
Speaker 2: and he was just annoying me, and I was like zaying,

485
00:23:11,720 --> 00:23:14,880
Speaker 2: when I die, I want I want you to take

486
00:23:14,920 --> 00:23:17,440
Speaker 2: my body and hand feed it to a great white

487
00:23:17,440 --> 00:23:20,240
Speaker 2: shark just because I wanted to him, and he like,

488
00:23:20,400 --> 00:23:22,760
Speaker 2: he took me very seriously. I was like, I want

489
00:23:22,880 --> 00:23:25,680
Speaker 2: somebody to bring a fish into the shark opens its mouth,

490
00:23:25,680 --> 00:23:26,919
Speaker 2: and then I want you to look at me and

491
00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:30,080
Speaker 2: then throw me in there. And he was like, oh, okay.

492
00:23:30,160 --> 00:23:32,200
Speaker 2: I think it was just my way of like over

493
00:23:32,280 --> 00:23:36,000
Speaker 2: confusing him to the point of leaving me alone when

494
00:23:36,000 --> 00:23:37,959
Speaker 2: my passive aggressiveness wasn't working.

495
00:23:38,359 --> 00:23:42,159
Speaker 1: Oh man, I want to I'm trying to think about mine.

496
00:23:42,600 --> 00:23:44,200
Speaker 1: This is what I think. First off, it's I wanted

497
00:23:44,240 --> 00:23:48,399
Speaker 1: to be a party, definitely, just nice. Those things usually

498
00:23:48,480 --> 00:23:49,600
Speaker 1: do turn into a party.

499
00:23:49,720 --> 00:23:51,240
Speaker 2: Oh yeah.

500
00:23:51,320 --> 00:23:55,439
Speaker 1: But so I've always thought it was nice. I've always

501
00:23:55,440 --> 00:23:57,119
Speaker 1: thought it was nice to have a paddle out and

502
00:23:57,160 --> 00:24:00,080
Speaker 1: then dump the ashes with a paddle out. Love it,

503
00:24:00,119 --> 00:24:02,000
Speaker 1: but I would love to do it, but I don't.

504
00:24:02,280 --> 00:24:05,720
Speaker 1: All of my close family and friends do not surf, right,

505
00:24:05,800 --> 00:24:09,359
Speaker 1: So that is now my new idea is that you

506
00:24:09,600 --> 00:24:10,560
Speaker 1: have to paddle out.

507
00:24:10,720 --> 00:24:11,280
Speaker 2: I'll do it.

508
00:24:11,359 --> 00:24:14,080
Speaker 1: So however many people show up at my funeral, You're

509
00:24:14,119 --> 00:24:16,520
Speaker 1: going to have to get on a surfboard, make it

510
00:24:16,600 --> 00:24:20,320
Speaker 1: past the break out to you know, out to still water,

511
00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:23,640
Speaker 1: and then dump my ashes there have a high five

512
00:24:23,680 --> 00:24:24,520
Speaker 1: and everyone has to.

513
00:24:24,480 --> 00:24:27,680
Speaker 2: Surf in done. That's I mean, it's that's an easy

514
00:24:27,680 --> 00:24:31,080
Speaker 2: one for me. That's a yes automatic for me. That'll

515
00:24:31,119 --> 00:24:31,440
Speaker 2: be fun.

516
00:24:31,480 --> 00:24:33,080
Speaker 1: It's going to be a lot of people who are

517
00:24:33,200 --> 00:24:34,960
Speaker 1: just not being able to sit on the board, which

518
00:24:35,000 --> 00:24:36,120
Speaker 1: I'm going to be excited about.

519
00:24:36,240 --> 00:24:38,320
Speaker 2: I think I might have told this one, but you

520
00:24:38,440 --> 00:24:40,560
Speaker 2: just reminded me. I'm pretty sure I told you this then,

521
00:24:40,640 --> 00:24:42,720
Speaker 2: maybe like twenty twenty, but why not say it again.

522
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:45,199
Speaker 2: So I had a friend that worked on Tosh point zero, okay,

523
00:24:45,520 --> 00:24:48,480
Speaker 2: and Tash is a big surfer and lived down at

524
00:24:48,520 --> 00:24:53,080
Speaker 2: Hermos at the time, and he told a story that

525
00:24:53,119 --> 00:24:56,080
Speaker 2: he was out there surfing by himself, as he liked

526
00:24:56,119 --> 00:24:58,439
Speaker 2: to do sometimes before they would tape or whatever, and

527
00:24:58,520 --> 00:25:00,399
Speaker 2: he came into the writer's room. He's like, the funniest

528
00:25:00,400 --> 00:25:03,439
Speaker 2: thing just happened to me. I was surfing out and

529
00:25:03,440 --> 00:25:06,480
Speaker 2: her Mosa by myself, and I see this like young guy,

530
00:25:06,920 --> 00:25:11,160
Speaker 2: looks like look at him, and then start paddling directly

531
00:25:11,200 --> 00:25:13,320
Speaker 2: towards him. And at this point, toush when I was

532
00:25:13,320 --> 00:25:15,800
Speaker 2: like the number one show on Comedy Central, huge, huge,

533
00:25:16,280 --> 00:25:18,919
Speaker 2: and so he's like christ like he just wanted a

534
00:25:18,960 --> 00:25:20,679
Speaker 2: moment is in. Instead, he's gonna have to deal with

535
00:25:20,680 --> 00:25:24,040
Speaker 2: a fan. This guy paddles like seventy yards over to him,

536
00:25:24,240 --> 00:25:27,000
Speaker 2: and as he gets up to him, Tosh looks up

537
00:25:27,040 --> 00:25:29,760
Speaker 2: at him, and the guy goes, surfing by yourself, What

538
00:25:29,880 --> 00:25:33,240
Speaker 2: a fucking loser, and then just catches away and surfs away.

539
00:25:33,960 --> 00:25:36,520
Speaker 2: Didn't say Tosh, I know who you are, just like

540
00:25:36,720 --> 00:25:39,000
Speaker 2: made fun of this guy for sitting out there by

541
00:25:39,080 --> 00:25:41,280
Speaker 2: himself and paddled on in.

542
00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:44,280
Speaker 1: That's so funny because this guy was also surfing by

543
00:25:44,320 --> 00:25:44,880
Speaker 1: him saying.

544
00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:47,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly, serving by yourself. Yeah, you might not have

545
00:25:47,440 --> 00:25:50,160
Speaker 2: a cost that she said, serving by yourself, What a loser,

546
00:25:50,320 --> 00:25:51,480
Speaker 2: and then just surfed in.

547
00:25:51,960 --> 00:25:57,520
Speaker 1: I remember I was out like in Malibu, but not

548
00:25:57,560 --> 00:26:01,959
Speaker 1: at Malibu, and I was surfing, surfing for probably two hours,

549
00:26:02,240 --> 00:26:05,120
Speaker 1: for a full hour I was. I was like, I'm

550
00:26:05,119 --> 00:26:07,520
Speaker 1: surfing with Woody Harrelson, Like that's amazing.

551
00:26:07,160 --> 00:26:08,960
Speaker 2: That's cool. Here he is, that's a good one.

552
00:26:09,000 --> 00:26:11,479
Speaker 1: Crazy. And he had like a little group of like

553
00:26:11,520 --> 00:26:14,040
Speaker 1: guys who are kind of like kind of doing kind

554
00:26:14,040 --> 00:26:15,159
Speaker 1: of a weird half circle.

555
00:26:15,400 --> 00:26:16,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, keep people.

556
00:26:16,440 --> 00:26:19,479
Speaker 1: From paddling over to it, right and uh, And I

557
00:26:19,520 --> 00:26:21,720
Speaker 1: was like, look, at that, like he surfs with like

558
00:26:21,760 --> 00:26:23,760
Speaker 1: a crew who like make sure people.

559
00:26:23,520 --> 00:26:25,520
Speaker 2: Don't bother, a very woody thing to do.

560
00:26:25,680 --> 00:26:27,480
Speaker 1: And I saw him catchwave and I was like that

561
00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:31,040
Speaker 1: that definitely could be woody Harrelson, Like it's he could

562
00:26:31,040 --> 00:26:35,040
Speaker 1: stand up, but he wasn't like ripping it or And

563
00:26:35,080 --> 00:26:37,399
Speaker 1: then I get out at the same time as he

564
00:26:37,440 --> 00:26:42,520
Speaker 1: gets out, and it's just a guy. It's just a

565
00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:48,600
Speaker 1: regular guy just losing his hair. That's what he Harrelson

566
00:26:48,640 --> 00:26:50,600
Speaker 1: to be, normal guy who's losing his hair.

567
00:26:51,000 --> 00:26:54,200
Speaker 2: It was probably it was probably Jeff Bezos and reality.

568
00:26:54,960 --> 00:26:57,320
Speaker 2: All right, I want us to tease you into one

569
00:26:57,880 --> 00:27:02,080
Speaker 2: into some advertisements. Tale of a table that made me

570
00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:03,760
Speaker 2: question reality.

571
00:27:04,760 --> 00:27:06,600
Speaker 1: Wow, I'm fascinating.

572
00:27:06,720 --> 00:27:07,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, we will.

573
00:27:07,520 --> 00:27:09,720
Speaker 1: We will get the answer to this mystery when we

574
00:27:09,800 --> 00:27:38,320
Speaker 1: come back on more.

575
00:27:40,000 --> 00:27:40,320
Speaker 2: Folks.

576
00:27:40,359 --> 00:27:44,320
Speaker 1: Welcome back to Indy Scott. You got any shout outs.

577
00:27:44,240 --> 00:27:47,280
Speaker 2: Have some shout outs. Sarah wants to shout out Mike.

578
00:27:47,359 --> 00:27:50,240
Speaker 2: They moved from Golf Breeze, Florida to New York City

579
00:27:50,280 --> 00:27:54,119
Speaker 2: exactly one year ago, and it's going pretty good. All right,

580
00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:57,200
Speaker 2: Golf Breeze, I I used to love you don't speed

581
00:27:57,200 --> 00:28:00,600
Speaker 2: in golf Breeze. Kurt lots of speed traps. They love

582
00:28:01,000 --> 00:28:04,840
Speaker 2: to pull people over. It's pretty crazy. Ali Donn is

583
00:28:04,840 --> 00:28:07,400
Speaker 2: shouting out herself. She started working as a registered nurse.

584
00:28:07,440 --> 00:28:10,119
Speaker 2: This one's a little old. Sorry Ali got buried. She

585
00:28:10,200 --> 00:28:12,600
Speaker 2: had a crazy fifteen months Kurtie be. She took the

586
00:28:12,640 --> 00:28:15,399
Speaker 2: Accelerated Nursing program, got married in May, and moved to

587
00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:18,200
Speaker 2: North Carolina a week later. But Ali is also a

588
00:28:18,280 --> 00:28:22,560
Speaker 2: day one bananimal. So congratulations, thank you, congrats.

589
00:28:22,720 --> 00:28:25,160
Speaker 1: We love the nurses do my mom was a nurse.

590
00:28:25,320 --> 00:28:28,640
Speaker 2: We love the nurses. Also, Sarahnette and Clayton rowe invited

591
00:28:28,680 --> 00:28:30,840
Speaker 2: you and me to a wedding in Texas in November.

592
00:28:31,800 --> 00:28:33,439
Speaker 2: So we'll have to look at that and see if

593
00:28:33,480 --> 00:28:38,040
Speaker 2: we can make that work. June and Jen wants to

594
00:28:38,040 --> 00:28:40,960
Speaker 2: shout out Nick. We said no more anniversaries because they

595
00:28:41,040 --> 00:28:45,680
Speaker 2: just get inundated. But they met on Craigslist twelve years ago.

596
00:28:46,760 --> 00:28:49,719
Speaker 1: On Craigslistiness Connections or on Craigslist like you want to do?

597
00:28:49,800 --> 00:28:51,720
Speaker 2: They didn't say. But Kurt and I used to do

598
00:28:51,760 --> 00:28:54,080
Speaker 2: a live show in New York called Neither Living. We

599
00:28:54,160 --> 00:28:55,920
Speaker 2: did I don't know five or seven of them, and

600
00:28:55,960 --> 00:28:58,840
Speaker 2: it was a great, really fun late night chat show.

601
00:28:59,520 --> 00:29:02,080
Speaker 2: We had up it. So we had Carl passed out

602
00:29:02,120 --> 00:29:06,040
Speaker 2: in front of the desk. We had Zach kalfanekis Jenny Slay.

603
00:29:06,160 --> 00:29:08,520
Speaker 1: I want to post some photo. We can post a photo.

604
00:29:08,560 --> 00:29:11,800
Speaker 2: I think it was incredible how fun it was. But

605
00:29:11,880 --> 00:29:14,360
Speaker 2: we used to do a thing called mixed connections where

606
00:29:14,440 --> 00:29:19,360
Speaker 2: Kurt would read real misconnections and people thought we were

607
00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:23,440
Speaker 2: writing like the best jokes, but they were real Brooklyn

608
00:29:23,600 --> 00:29:26,040
Speaker 2: miss connections. We have to dig those up somewhere. They

609
00:29:26,040 --> 00:29:26,920
Speaker 2: were incredible.

610
00:29:27,120 --> 00:29:29,240
Speaker 1: I used to do it in my stand up actually,

611
00:29:29,920 --> 00:29:31,560
Speaker 1: but yeah, that was that was so great.

612
00:29:31,680 --> 00:29:33,000
Speaker 2: It was so fun.

613
00:29:33,160 --> 00:29:34,760
Speaker 1: She used to have one thing where it was just

614
00:29:34,800 --> 00:29:37,840
Speaker 1: like it was just pictures and I would be like,

615
00:29:37,920 --> 00:29:39,720
Speaker 1: what was It was like I guess what it is

616
00:29:39,840 --> 00:29:40,160
Speaker 1: or something.

617
00:29:40,200 --> 00:29:43,480
Speaker 2: It was something on comments or yeah it was something. Yeah,

618
00:29:43,520 --> 00:29:45,680
Speaker 2: but that would always crush whatever that bit was did

619
00:29:45,720 --> 00:29:49,360
Speaker 2: really good. Yeah. And then last but not least this

620
00:29:49,520 --> 00:29:51,320
Speaker 2: week and this is a very good one. And it

621
00:29:51,360 --> 00:29:56,000
Speaker 2: starts got a funny Leo wrinkle face, which I think

622
00:29:56,040 --> 00:29:58,800
Speaker 2: is the name of a cap What's to bring awareness

623
00:29:58,840 --> 00:30:02,320
Speaker 2: to Project Purple. Project Purple dot org is focused on

624
00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:05,640
Speaker 2: curing pancreatic cancer, still one of the worst cancers we

625
00:30:05,680 --> 00:30:10,000
Speaker 2: all know. Yeah, I believe Leo Wrinkleface's account is run

626
00:30:10,000 --> 00:30:13,200
Speaker 2: by Caitlin Krabs, who will be running to raise money

627
00:30:13,280 --> 00:30:16,920
Speaker 2: for pancreatic cancer and Project Purple dot org. When this

628
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:19,560
Speaker 2: episode comes out, we'll post a link in our stories.

629
00:30:19,600 --> 00:30:22,240
Speaker 2: And I think I've already made a donation on Banana's

630
00:30:22,280 --> 00:30:26,920
Speaker 2: behalf but very cool. Oh, Project Purple sounds great, and yeah,

631
00:30:26,960 --> 00:30:28,520
Speaker 2: we will post a link. If you have five bucks,

632
00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:31,680
Speaker 2: ten bucks, whatever, make a donation, do it.

633
00:30:31,800 --> 00:30:36,160
Speaker 1: Thank you, you got it. We are back on a

634
00:30:36,160 --> 00:30:37,160
Speaker 1: solo episode.

635
00:30:37,360 --> 00:30:40,040
Speaker 2: We love the solo apps, so you know, congratulations. We

636
00:30:40,080 --> 00:30:43,240
Speaker 2: started this podcast, Kurt two and a half years ago.

637
00:30:44,120 --> 00:30:48,680
Speaker 2: That's right, Zelda Zelda's Soelda doesn't like Zelda wants to talk,

638
00:30:50,280 --> 00:30:52,440
Speaker 2: just sniffing the mic. We started this two and a

639
00:30:52,440 --> 00:30:54,760
Speaker 2: half years ago. We thought, hey, maybe we'll have five

640
00:30:54,800 --> 00:30:57,640
Speaker 2: thousand listeners, maybe we'll have ten thousand. But we've just

641
00:30:57,760 --> 00:31:00,720
Speaker 2: grown to a place where now we have dozens of

642
00:31:00,720 --> 00:31:04,160
Speaker 2: people doing door to shore. We're having these great sold

643
00:31:04,160 --> 00:31:07,040
Speaker 2: out live shows including Kansas City and Minneapolis.

644
00:31:07,480 --> 00:31:09,840
Speaker 1: It's really it's been overwhelming and thank you.

645
00:31:09,920 --> 00:31:12,480
Speaker 2: Much the best. We love it. So thanks to all

646
00:31:12,480 --> 00:31:14,840
Speaker 2: the new ban animals, the day One Ban animals, the

647
00:31:14,840 --> 00:31:18,000
Speaker 2: Browne animals, the Baine animals means a lot to us.

648
00:31:18,000 --> 00:31:21,680
Speaker 2: We enjoy making it all right, give me that stories scoch. Okay,

649
00:31:21,800 --> 00:31:25,560
Speaker 2: So normally we're strange news, weird news podcasts. This one, though,

650
00:31:25,600 --> 00:31:27,280
Speaker 2: every once in a while we take a little trip down.

651
00:31:27,280 --> 00:31:29,440
Speaker 2: Read it right. Yeah, so this was sent in by

652
00:31:29,520 --> 00:31:32,160
Speaker 2: Valerie O'Neil, who's sent in many great stories in the past.

653
00:31:32,160 --> 00:31:34,920
Speaker 2: It's not a news story, but it is a strange story. Okay, okay,

654
00:31:35,040 --> 00:31:36,720
Speaker 2: this could take the rest of the episode, by the way,

655
00:31:36,800 --> 00:31:38,080
Speaker 2: So let's lee in. Dive it.

656
00:31:38,160 --> 00:31:40,040
Speaker 1: Let me, let me get let me get comfortable. I

657
00:31:40,120 --> 00:31:42,280
Speaker 1: was standing for excitement, but I'm ready.

658
00:31:42,400 --> 00:31:45,480
Speaker 2: A tale of a table that made me question reality.

659
00:31:45,520 --> 00:31:48,560
Speaker 2: So it's about a server. It's a server, a waiters story.

660
00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:52,080
Speaker 2: Oh good. Yesterday at two top, two people sat themselves

661
00:31:52,080 --> 00:31:55,240
Speaker 2: in my section at a dirty table. The tablecloth hadn't

662
00:31:55,240 --> 00:31:59,200
Speaker 2: even been changed. This as a former like nine year waiter,

663
00:31:59,320 --> 00:32:03,600
Speaker 2: this drives me up the walls. The people weren't rude exactly.

664
00:32:04,000 --> 00:32:07,240
Speaker 2: While we reseat the table, they asked, where are our menus?

665
00:32:07,520 --> 00:32:09,680
Speaker 2: The busser, myself and the hosts are trying to move

666
00:32:09,720 --> 00:32:11,880
Speaker 2: around and clear glasses and plates around them. The act

667
00:32:11,880 --> 00:32:15,520
Speaker 2: it confused, if anything like, how dare this table not

668
00:32:15,560 --> 00:32:19,040
Speaker 2: be ready for us? Reserved at a fine dining restaurant?

669
00:32:19,360 --> 00:32:21,520
Speaker 2: So these people did not have a reservation. They just

670
00:32:21,560 --> 00:32:24,280
Speaker 2: sat down. I got their waters. I tried to do

671
00:32:24,360 --> 00:32:27,480
Speaker 2: my spiel the whole These are the chef's specials, et cetera,

672
00:32:27,520 --> 00:32:31,479
Speaker 2: et cetera. And then they interrupted me. Quote, if I

673
00:32:31,600 --> 00:32:33,760
Speaker 2: order a glass of wine, do I have to pay

674
00:32:33,760 --> 00:32:38,880
Speaker 2: for it? And quote I thought I misheard, so I asked,

675
00:32:38,920 --> 00:32:41,120
Speaker 2: what do you mean? And they repeated themselves, If I

676
00:32:41,240 --> 00:32:42,880
Speaker 2: order a glass of wine, do I have to pay

677
00:32:42,920 --> 00:32:45,520
Speaker 2: for it? I said, very professionally, yes, it will be

678
00:32:45,600 --> 00:32:49,760
Speaker 2: on your bill at the end of the dining experience. Oh,

679
00:32:49,840 --> 00:32:53,920
Speaker 2: they said, disappointed and confused. Do I want the burger

680
00:32:54,080 --> 00:32:57,360
Speaker 2: or the salmon? They said? Are you in the red?

681
00:32:57,480 --> 00:32:59,560
Speaker 2: Are in the mood for red meat or seafood? The

682
00:32:59,560 --> 00:33:02,160
Speaker 2: burgers garnish with X Y Z and sits between a

683
00:33:02,200 --> 00:33:04,920
Speaker 2: baked in house blah blah blah, rich savory flavors, while

684
00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:08,040
Speaker 2: the salmon is on top of vegetables with this brightly

685
00:33:08,080 --> 00:33:14,240
Speaker 2: flavored glaze. Again stairs of confusion. Quote I said to them,

686
00:33:14,320 --> 00:33:16,360
Speaker 2: I can give you a moment if you'd like to

687
00:33:16,400 --> 00:33:18,680
Speaker 2: review the menu further. These people just sat down and

688
00:33:18,760 --> 00:33:22,480
Speaker 2: this has already started. They said, no, we're ready now.

689
00:33:22,800 --> 00:33:25,160
Speaker 2: I said, okay, what do you like? They said, I

690
00:33:25,200 --> 00:33:29,040
Speaker 2: don't know. In my brain right now, I'm just wondering

691
00:33:29,280 --> 00:33:32,080
Speaker 2: what the fuck is happening. There is no language barrier.

692
00:33:32,160 --> 00:33:35,320
Speaker 2: There doesn't seem to be a cultural barrier. They aren't

693
00:33:35,320 --> 00:33:38,760
Speaker 2: acting rude or upset, just they are confused. They're well

694
00:33:38,840 --> 00:33:41,800
Speaker 2: dressed in their forties. They have to have gone to

695
00:33:41,840 --> 00:33:46,960
Speaker 2: a restaurant before and know how this works. Oh man, already,

696
00:33:47,040 --> 00:33:47,920
Speaker 2: this is amazing.

697
00:33:48,520 --> 00:33:51,880
Speaker 1: This is It does seem like aliens have just gotten

698
00:33:51,920 --> 00:33:54,640
Speaker 1: into human being bodies and then walked out into the

699
00:33:54,640 --> 00:33:56,720
Speaker 1: world to experience it for the very first.

700
00:33:56,760 --> 00:34:02,160
Speaker 2: Yes, they're pretending to be humans. The other customer, the

701
00:34:02,200 --> 00:34:06,080
Speaker 2: other friend, actually says, she's asking what you want to order? Okay,

702
00:34:06,120 --> 00:34:10,680
Speaker 2: all right, So they she wants me to decide for them.

703
00:34:11,040 --> 00:34:14,600
Speaker 2: That's actually pretty common. You just need to explicitly say

704
00:34:14,640 --> 00:34:16,959
Speaker 2: that to me, like what should I order? All right?

705
00:34:17,239 --> 00:34:20,359
Speaker 2: I suggest the salmon then, and for you quote, I'll

706
00:34:20,400 --> 00:34:25,000
Speaker 2: have the whatever filet Absolutely no pink, I repeat back

707
00:34:25,000 --> 00:34:27,279
Speaker 2: their orders. They agreed. I think I'm in the clear.

708
00:34:27,440 --> 00:34:30,800
Speaker 2: I'm about to walk away when one of them says, quote,

709
00:34:30,840 --> 00:34:34,719
Speaker 2: will you bring us appetizers? Of course I will. What

710
00:34:34,800 --> 00:34:38,640
Speaker 2: would you like them? Not even opening the menu chicken wings?

711
00:34:41,160 --> 00:34:44,760
Speaker 2: I apologize because we don't sell chicken wings. I suggest

712
00:34:45,000 --> 00:34:47,320
Speaker 2: X or y appetizer. We also have a chicken on

713
00:34:47,480 --> 00:34:50,440
Speaker 2: trade that would probably be the closest thing to chicken wings,

714
00:34:50,600 --> 00:34:57,200
Speaker 2: and there's an excellent sharing option. Blank stares, what is

715
00:34:57,239 --> 00:35:02,160
Speaker 2: this experience? Also bless this sir for being so patient.

716
00:35:03,600 --> 00:35:07,319
Speaker 2: Other friend, she just wants something fast. I explained that

717
00:35:07,320 --> 00:35:10,880
Speaker 2: our kitchen is from scratch kitchen. We do all of

718
00:35:10,880 --> 00:35:14,040
Speaker 2: our appetizers as long as it takes, are longer sometimes

719
00:35:14,040 --> 00:35:17,400
Speaker 2: than the entrees, even yes, a well done steak. I

720
00:35:17,440 --> 00:35:20,320
Speaker 2: offered to bring them some bread, and again I repeated

721
00:35:20,320 --> 00:35:25,359
Speaker 2: their order decided on entrees, only an extra bread. So

722
00:35:25,400 --> 00:35:27,839
Speaker 2: I bring them two portions of bread. I say, here,

723
00:35:27,880 --> 00:35:32,400
Speaker 2: you are, our chef, freshly baked bread. This is with butter.

724
00:35:33,840 --> 00:35:37,000
Speaker 2: Our bread looks exactly like bread. There's no mistaking it

725
00:35:37,000 --> 00:35:40,880
Speaker 2: for anything else. The table looks at me a gas

726
00:35:40,880 --> 00:35:44,040
Speaker 2: and confused, like I messed something up. This is bread.

727
00:35:44,080 --> 00:35:50,239
Speaker 2: They asked, yes, so this is bread. Yes, it's our

728
00:35:50,280 --> 00:35:54,680
Speaker 2: baked in house bread. At a popular chain restaurant, the

729
00:35:54,719 --> 00:35:58,239
Speaker 2: bread they serve comes with oil. Why is this not

730
00:35:58,320 --> 00:36:00,880
Speaker 2: with your bread? It's not as as good as their bread.

731
00:36:00,960 --> 00:36:04,359
Speaker 2: You're right, it is a different bread. I say, I'd

732
00:36:04,360 --> 00:36:07,000
Speaker 2: be happy to bring you olive oil for dipping. Would

733
00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:13,200
Speaker 2: you like some olive oil? No? Are you sure you

734
00:36:13,239 --> 00:36:16,279
Speaker 2: don't have any other bread? Quoting the other restaurant's name.

735
00:36:17,040 --> 00:36:18,680
Speaker 2: So it's as if they're saying, do not have o

736
00:36:18,840 --> 00:36:21,439
Speaker 2: Charlie's bread, Do not have red Lobster's bread?

737
00:36:21,480 --> 00:36:22,319
Speaker 1: Have Applebee's bread?

738
00:36:22,480 --> 00:36:23,200
Speaker 2: That's what they're asked.

739
00:36:23,520 --> 00:36:25,920
Speaker 1: I bet you you know whose bread I think it is.

740
00:36:26,239 --> 00:36:28,400
Speaker 1: I bet you it's out back steakhouses bread.

741
00:36:28,400 --> 00:36:29,040
Speaker 2: They have good bread.

742
00:36:29,080 --> 00:36:30,080
Speaker 1: They have good brown bread.

743
00:36:30,120 --> 00:36:33,600
Speaker 2: Mmm. Was it a Bavarian wheat's I bet it is.

744
00:36:33,640 --> 00:36:35,120
Speaker 2: I used to have to sell that all the time.

745
00:36:35,120 --> 00:36:37,160
Speaker 2: That's see. What is this? I go to Bavarian wheat

746
00:36:37,160 --> 00:36:38,879
Speaker 2: with honey butter and they'd be like, oh, it's our

747
00:36:38,920 --> 00:36:44,040
Speaker 2: favorite bread. Then they tip eight percent. You are right,

748
00:36:44,120 --> 00:36:49,480
Speaker 2: I said it is different bread. You sure you don't

749
00:36:49,520 --> 00:36:52,319
Speaker 2: have their bread? Okay? If you want their bread, maybe

750
00:36:52,360 --> 00:36:55,240
Speaker 2: you guys should go there. Yes, I'm sure I don't

751
00:36:55,239 --> 00:36:58,160
Speaker 2: have that bread. I apologize. Is there anything else I

752
00:36:58,160 --> 00:37:00,839
Speaker 2: can bring you at the moment. No, They're filled with

753
00:37:00,960 --> 00:37:05,759
Speaker 2: both disappointment and confusion. Thirty to forty minutes later, the

754
00:37:05,800 --> 00:37:08,760
Speaker 2: food runner finds me with the blah blah filet in hand.

755
00:37:09,080 --> 00:37:12,120
Speaker 2: They said, Table seventy seven said they did not order this.

756
00:37:13,200 --> 00:37:15,160
Speaker 2: I go up to the table. I said, Hi, you

757
00:37:15,320 --> 00:37:18,720
Speaker 2: ordered this filet cooked well done? Correct? Yes, I ordered

758
00:37:18,719 --> 00:37:20,919
Speaker 2: the blah blah fil at. I think they're just saying

759
00:37:20,960 --> 00:37:23,560
Speaker 2: blah blah for whatever reason. Okay, here's your blah blah

760
00:37:23,560 --> 00:37:26,080
Speaker 2: blah fla. No, no, no, no, no, no, that is

761
00:37:26,200 --> 00:37:29,040
Speaker 2: not the blah blah blah blat. It doesn't have the

762
00:37:29,040 --> 00:37:32,279
Speaker 2: Then she describes a completely different steak with other garnishes

763
00:37:32,320 --> 00:37:34,960
Speaker 2: and sides, sides that we do not make or carry.

764
00:37:35,080 --> 00:37:38,600
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I mean I would as a as

765
00:37:38,640 --> 00:37:43,439
Speaker 2: a former server, like little things. People to order things

766
00:37:43,480 --> 00:37:46,040
Speaker 2: like chicory coffee, like something where you're like, oh, maybe

767
00:37:46,040 --> 00:37:48,520
Speaker 2: they sold that before I started working with her. Yeah,

768
00:37:48,520 --> 00:37:50,319
Speaker 2: and you go, I'm sorry, we don't have that, And

769
00:37:50,360 --> 00:37:55,640
Speaker 2: the look of disappointment on people's faces incredible. Also, just

770
00:37:55,719 --> 00:37:58,640
Speaker 2: side note. We had great delivery at this one place,

771
00:37:58,680 --> 00:38:01,600
Speaker 2: and they had a separate little area for the delivery

772
00:38:01,640 --> 00:38:05,160
Speaker 2: person whoever was answering the phone. And this one woman

773
00:38:05,200 --> 00:38:08,600
Speaker 2: who is my absolute favorite there named Pokey. She was

774
00:38:08,600 --> 00:38:11,880
Speaker 2: a really sweet woman, Pokey. When she started, I was

775
00:38:11,920 --> 00:38:14,000
Speaker 2: listening to the other person training her, and she's like

776
00:38:14,120 --> 00:38:17,279
Speaker 2: in this book, and it was a little album, and

777
00:38:17,320 --> 00:38:19,720
Speaker 2: it was all the people who they no longer delivered

778
00:38:19,760 --> 00:38:23,520
Speaker 2: to for various reasons, like women who would answer completely naked,

779
00:38:24,120 --> 00:38:26,440
Speaker 2: men who would refuse to pay. But they had a

780
00:38:26,480 --> 00:38:29,120
Speaker 2: whole book of like addresses and phone numbers that would

781
00:38:29,120 --> 00:38:31,520
Speaker 2: do not I would love to have gotten that when

782
00:38:31,520 --> 00:38:34,400
Speaker 2: I left. What a coffee table book? I the weirdos

783
00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:36,879
Speaker 2: you delivered to and why we no longer delivered to them?

784
00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:40,640
Speaker 2: I would love to read that coffee table book. Okay,

785
00:38:41,360 --> 00:38:46,560
Speaker 2: so I apologize and I said say, I'm sorry, but

786
00:38:46,880 --> 00:38:49,360
Speaker 2: you ordered this filet and I'm sorry this is not

787
00:38:49,440 --> 00:38:52,319
Speaker 2: how you envisioned it. However, this restaurant doesn't have the

788
00:38:52,360 --> 00:38:55,760
Speaker 2: meal you described. Would you like to enjoy this meal

789
00:38:56,120 --> 00:38:59,520
Speaker 2: or would you like to order something else from our menu? Yes?

790
00:38:59,640 --> 00:39:02,600
Speaker 2: I want that filet. So now my brain is melting.

791
00:39:03,400 --> 00:39:05,560
Speaker 2: I feel like I'm losing my grip on reality. Am

792
00:39:05,560 --> 00:39:08,800
Speaker 2: I not communicating properly? Why are me in this table

793
00:39:08,880 --> 00:39:11,800
Speaker 2: not living in the same reality? And what is happening?

794
00:39:12,600 --> 00:39:15,120
Speaker 2: This is the blah blah file, I say, gesturing to

795
00:39:15,160 --> 00:39:17,319
Speaker 2: the plate in front of her. Oh no, it's not,

796
00:39:17,520 --> 00:39:23,400
Speaker 2: she says, Could this be a bit maybe? But this

797
00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:25,640
Speaker 2: feels like the strangest bit I know.

798
00:39:25,920 --> 00:39:26,719
Speaker 1: It really does.

799
00:39:27,200 --> 00:39:30,680
Speaker 2: Like there's no win, there's no like, and it doesn't

800
00:39:30,760 --> 00:39:33,799
Speaker 2: end with like ind camera or anything. So no, it's not.

801
00:39:34,040 --> 00:39:36,600
Speaker 2: After a few back and forth, she decides that she

802
00:39:36,800 --> 00:39:40,080
Speaker 2: does not want this filet or to order anything else.

803
00:39:40,360 --> 00:39:43,560
Speaker 2: She sat and watched her friend eat dinner in record time.

804
00:39:43,880 --> 00:39:47,600
Speaker 2: Chicken wing Lady was really hungry. I drop off the check.

805
00:39:47,640 --> 00:39:50,680
Speaker 2: I process the card easily. When I see she has

806
00:39:50,920 --> 00:39:52,840
Speaker 2: finished signing it, I go back to the table and

807
00:39:52,880 --> 00:39:55,480
Speaker 2: ask I can take the check presenter, if you're all

808
00:39:55,520 --> 00:39:57,960
Speaker 2: set with it. She then hands it to me, untouched,

809
00:39:58,000 --> 00:40:02,040
Speaker 2: still folded in a cloth napkin. To her credit, both

810
00:40:02,080 --> 00:40:04,560
Speaker 2: are black and rectangular, but there so she hands her

811
00:40:04,640 --> 00:40:07,360
Speaker 2: the cloth napkin, not the checkbook. This is what they're saying,

812
00:40:07,960 --> 00:40:11,400
Speaker 2: but there's definitely a texture and weight difference between the materials.

813
00:40:11,440 --> 00:40:16,879
Speaker 2: So this woman just answer the napkin. This server should

814
00:40:16,920 --> 00:40:21,120
Speaker 2: be promoted to general manager immediately or tour with like

815
00:40:21,160 --> 00:40:24,359
Speaker 2: a life coach. Because this is incredible. I can clear

816
00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:27,440
Speaker 2: this napkin for you, ma'am. May but may I have

817
00:40:27,520 --> 00:40:30,840
Speaker 2: the check presenter. I just gave it to you, she says,

818
00:40:30,880 --> 00:40:33,520
Speaker 2: with no malice or no anger in her voice. I

819
00:40:33,600 --> 00:40:39,239
Speaker 2: double checked, and nope, it's a napkin. I eventually get

820
00:40:39,280 --> 00:40:42,600
Speaker 2: the check. They tip fifteen percent, which was honestly better

821
00:40:42,640 --> 00:40:45,800
Speaker 2: than I'd ever hoped for. They did leave their jacket,

822
00:40:45,920 --> 00:40:51,560
Speaker 2: no surprises there with the tags still on them. Of course,

823
00:40:53,080 --> 00:40:55,439
Speaker 2: they're the type of people who wear things and then

824
00:40:55,640 --> 00:40:59,920
Speaker 2: return them. The whole thing has left me exasperated and bewill.

825
00:41:00,560 --> 00:41:04,520
Speaker 2: I'm completely drained. It completely drained my social and emotional battery.

826
00:41:04,920 --> 00:41:07,760
Speaker 2: I felt like Kate McKinnon and the reenactment of Gaslight

827
00:41:07,800 --> 00:41:10,640
Speaker 2: Skitch Sketch where he's like, this is a steak and

828
00:41:10,640 --> 00:41:15,680
Speaker 2: she's like, I'm pretty sure to pineapple. That was my night. Incredible.

829
00:41:15,719 --> 00:41:20,640
Speaker 1: That is so amazing, incredible, Oh my god, like horrifying

830
00:41:20,680 --> 00:41:21,280
Speaker 1: and incredible.

831
00:41:21,320 --> 00:41:22,680
Speaker 2: Those people are out there.

832
00:41:23,040 --> 00:41:25,720
Speaker 1: Also, I just okay, so it's first off, they expect

833
00:41:25,719 --> 00:41:30,440
Speaker 1: that there's free wine, free wine, free wine appetizers that

834
00:41:30,560 --> 00:41:34,319
Speaker 1: just come without you ordering them, and specifically chicken wings, yes,

835
00:41:34,640 --> 00:41:36,319
Speaker 1: magically come after you order it.

836
00:41:36,480 --> 00:41:37,960
Speaker 2: Then they don't recognize the bread.

837
00:41:38,160 --> 00:41:41,440
Speaker 1: They don't that it's bread, and also ask the person

838
00:41:41,480 --> 00:41:43,920
Speaker 1: to order for them, and then demand that it's not

839
00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:44,600
Speaker 1: what they order.

840
00:41:44,760 --> 00:41:47,520
Speaker 2: Correct then say that's not the same bread as another

841
00:41:47,640 --> 00:41:51,200
Speaker 2: rival restaurant. Then say they didn't order what they ordered

842
00:41:51,200 --> 00:41:54,640
Speaker 2: because they wanted their food as quickly as possible. This

843
00:41:54,960 --> 00:41:57,920
Speaker 2: is fabulous, there really is. And they tip fifteen percent,

844
00:41:57,920 --> 00:41:59,400
Speaker 2: which you know, it all comes out in the wash.

845
00:41:59,440 --> 00:42:01,760
Speaker 2: If you tip fifteen percent, all is forgiven.

846
00:42:02,600 --> 00:42:05,200
Speaker 1: Fifteen percent, all is forgiven. I feel like twenty percent.

847
00:42:05,520 --> 00:42:08,000
Speaker 2: Well, if you're weird, I mean the kitchen, the chef's

848
00:42:08,080 --> 00:42:10,919
Speaker 2: probably hated them for like trying to send back food

849
00:42:10,960 --> 00:42:14,280
Speaker 2: or whatever. But god, blet this server, I mean whatever,

850
00:42:14,480 --> 00:42:17,640
Speaker 2: the top tier at least free shift drinks, but like,

851
00:42:17,760 --> 00:42:21,439
Speaker 2: come on, that patience level is through the roof.

852
00:42:23,520 --> 00:42:26,480
Speaker 1: Oh man, I wish I had that table. When I

853
00:42:26,520 --> 00:42:32,160
Speaker 1: worked at nifty fifty Tambers nifty to fifty diner in Baltimore, Maryland,

854
00:42:32,520 --> 00:42:39,040
Speaker 1: the only fifties themed diner that also served Indian food

855
00:42:39,120 --> 00:42:40,720
Speaker 1: that was really great.

856
00:42:41,120 --> 00:42:43,000
Speaker 2: Oh really, that's pretty cool.

857
00:42:43,160 --> 00:42:45,719
Speaker 1: The whole front of the menu was like a fifties

858
00:42:45,719 --> 00:42:47,680
Speaker 1: dining and you would walked into this place and it

859
00:42:47,800 --> 00:42:51,400
Speaker 1: was like a set of what a fifty diner is?

860
00:42:51,440 --> 00:42:51,680
Speaker 2: You know.

861
00:42:51,960 --> 00:42:55,480
Speaker 1: It had like the old Hurlwitzer like.

862
00:42:55,440 --> 00:43:00,000
Speaker 2: That, Oh sure sure, jukeboxing box, yeah.

863
00:43:00,040 --> 00:43:04,680
Speaker 1: Fifties music pictures of Elvis, big Coke signs neon everywhere,

864
00:43:04,719 --> 00:43:07,480
Speaker 1: all red vinyl, and then you just flip and it

865
00:43:07,520 --> 00:43:09,600
Speaker 1: was all just like you want a turkey, so you

866
00:43:09,640 --> 00:43:11,560
Speaker 1: wanna you want a turkey club, you want a steak,

867
00:43:11,600 --> 00:43:14,239
Speaker 1: and you flip it over and there it is just amazing,

868
00:43:14,600 --> 00:43:16,839
Speaker 1: all Indie food. It was great Indian food.

869
00:43:16,920 --> 00:43:18,560
Speaker 2: I think we must have just aged out of those

870
00:43:18,560 --> 00:43:21,040
Speaker 2: because they were such a thing, meaning that the people

871
00:43:21,080 --> 00:43:24,080
Speaker 2: who enjoyed those are too old to go to them anymore,

872
00:43:24,120 --> 00:43:26,560
Speaker 2: because there was a time where so many places where

873
00:43:26,600 --> 00:43:29,200
Speaker 2: fifty style diners and all the ones in La I

874
00:43:29,239 --> 00:43:31,040
Speaker 2: think are closed and.

875
00:43:31,040 --> 00:43:34,400
Speaker 1: Fund Ruckers in general, isn't fud Ruckers generally like a

876
00:43:34,440 --> 00:43:35,200
Speaker 1: fifties diner.

877
00:43:35,200 --> 00:43:37,160
Speaker 2: And it was in the one in Bourbank Clothes, I

878
00:43:37,200 --> 00:43:38,960
Speaker 2: took you and robbed there once because that place was

879
00:43:39,040 --> 00:43:41,320
Speaker 2: so fun. It was always empty, the food was great.

880
00:43:41,480 --> 00:43:43,480
Speaker 2: And then, like I was taught when I worked at

881
00:43:43,520 --> 00:43:46,200
Speaker 2: the Bike Doctor, just fill a to go container and

882
00:43:46,200 --> 00:43:48,479
Speaker 2: make a giant free salad out of the fixings bar.

883
00:43:48,800 --> 00:43:50,600
Speaker 1: Why aren't That's why fud Rutgers went on.

884
00:43:50,800 --> 00:43:54,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, I did ten salads over thirty years. They just

885
00:43:54,239 --> 00:43:57,480
Speaker 2: were like, we cannot take this anymore.

886
00:43:57,640 --> 00:44:01,440
Speaker 1: I had kind of the flip experience of this, where

887
00:44:01,480 --> 00:44:04,040
Speaker 1: it was one day I was I think I was

888
00:44:04,080 --> 00:44:07,520
Speaker 1: in Brooklyn and it was me and my friend Steve

889
00:44:07,680 --> 00:44:11,400
Speaker 1: and my friend Pat and we sat down and Steve

890
00:44:11,440 --> 00:44:15,280
Speaker 1: and I ordered Bloody Mary's. We both order Bloody Mary's.

891
00:44:15,520 --> 00:44:18,360
Speaker 1: We're the only people in the restaurant. Yes, And the

892
00:44:18,880 --> 00:44:22,720
Speaker 1: waitress like okay, and she leaves and it's no kidding

893
00:44:22,920 --> 00:44:24,719
Speaker 1: because we're the only people in the restaurant. That's the

894
00:44:24,760 --> 00:44:27,440
Speaker 1: only reason I mentioned this. It was like fifteen to

895
00:44:27,520 --> 00:44:30,520
Speaker 1: twenty minutes, yes, and drinks have not come out, and

896
00:44:30,560 --> 00:44:32,279
Speaker 1: we're just like sitting there and we're chatting. We haven't

897
00:44:32,280 --> 00:44:34,000
Speaker 1: seen each other, yeah, so we don't even care y.

898
00:44:34,560 --> 00:44:36,040
Speaker 1: But then at a certain point it's like that's kind

899
00:44:36,040 --> 00:44:37,920
Speaker 1: of weird, and then the drinks come out and she

900
00:44:38,000 --> 00:44:42,919
Speaker 1: places them down and one one is pink and one

901
00:44:43,000 --> 00:44:46,480
Speaker 1: is brown. And then I just was like, why are

902
00:44:46,520 --> 00:44:49,640
Speaker 1: these two different colors? And she just looked at me

903
00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:55,520
Speaker 1: like I had like asked the craziest question ever, and

904
00:44:55,600 --> 00:45:00,520
Speaker 1: without answering, she just turned around and walked away with

905
00:45:00,600 --> 00:45:03,320
Speaker 1: them yes. And then she was gone for like another

906
00:45:03,440 --> 00:45:07,480
Speaker 1: ten minutes, and then she came out with them unchanged

907
00:45:07,640 --> 00:45:10,440
Speaker 1: yes and put them on my table and put them

908
00:45:10,440 --> 00:45:12,360
Speaker 1: on our table, and I was like, what is happening

909
00:45:12,400 --> 00:45:14,839
Speaker 1: in the back? What is happening in the kitchen? Like

910
00:45:14,880 --> 00:45:17,239
Speaker 1: does she is it just a kitchen filled with aliens?

911
00:45:17,320 --> 00:45:17,560
Speaker 2: You know?

912
00:45:17,800 --> 00:45:19,560
Speaker 1: Where she just like walks in and it's just like

913
00:45:19,560 --> 00:45:23,399
Speaker 1: a giant like ant, Like just like flipping through Encyclopedia

914
00:45:23,480 --> 00:45:26,680
Speaker 1: Britannica and like watching old episodes. I love Lucy trying

915
00:45:26,680 --> 00:45:28,319
Speaker 1: to figure out, like what do humans do?

916
00:45:30,360 --> 00:45:34,640
Speaker 2: What's new and good? I could remember all my best tables.

917
00:45:34,680 --> 00:45:37,160
Speaker 2: I can remember all the best tippers. I could remember

918
00:45:37,320 --> 00:45:40,320
Speaker 2: all the celebrities when I was a valet that would tip.

919
00:45:40,440 --> 00:45:43,160
Speaker 2: Like ll cool J came to the River Cafe and

920
00:45:43,200 --> 00:45:47,240
Speaker 2: he had just gotten a baby powder blue Bentley that day. Wow,

921
00:45:47,440 --> 00:45:49,719
Speaker 2: And he pulls up and he wasn't even eating on

922
00:45:49,800 --> 00:45:52,520
Speaker 2: our restaurant, but he knew that we had valet. So

923
00:45:52,560 --> 00:45:54,680
Speaker 2: he pulls up and he gets out. He's got like

924
00:45:54,680 --> 00:45:56,560
Speaker 2: a manager with him, not like a security guy or whatever.

925
00:45:56,600 --> 00:45:58,640
Speaker 2: He's got like an assistant with him, and he's like,

926
00:45:58,640 --> 00:46:02,480
Speaker 2: what's your name? And I'm wearing a white toxseedo top

927
00:46:02,600 --> 00:46:06,880
Speaker 2: with a bow tie, and I'm like, my name is Scotti,

928
00:46:06,920 --> 00:46:09,080
Speaker 2: goes Scottie. He's like licking his lips like l COOLJ

929
00:46:09,120 --> 00:46:12,000
Speaker 2: always locks his lips, and he's like, Scottie, I just

930
00:46:12,120 --> 00:46:14,719
Speaker 2: bought this Bentley two and a half hours ago. I

931
00:46:14,719 --> 00:46:16,920
Speaker 2: don't want anybody to look at it. I don't want

932
00:46:16,920 --> 00:46:19,160
Speaker 2: anybody to breathe on it. If you can take care

933
00:46:19,160 --> 00:46:20,920
Speaker 2: of it, my boil, take care of you. And he

934
00:46:21,040 --> 00:46:23,920
Speaker 2: like taps his assistant's chest and so I go, you

935
00:46:23,960 --> 00:46:25,839
Speaker 2: got it. He gives me the keys. I'm like, I

936
00:46:25,920 --> 00:46:28,319
Speaker 2: was like, ell, I'll park it right up front and

937
00:46:28,400 --> 00:46:31,799
Speaker 2: nobody's gonna touch it. Two hours later, his assistant comes back.

938
00:46:31,840 --> 00:46:34,319
Speaker 2: He's like, oh, it looks great, thank you. I hand

939
00:46:34,440 --> 00:46:36,839
Speaker 2: him the keys. He hands me sixty dollars just three

940
00:46:36,880 --> 00:46:39,400
Speaker 2: twenty dollars bills, gets in leaves and after that, I

941
00:46:39,440 --> 00:46:41,239
Speaker 2: was like, I was listening to L cool J for

942
00:46:41,239 --> 00:46:43,759
Speaker 2: two months. After that, I was like, I'm back on

943
00:46:43,800 --> 00:46:46,640
Speaker 2: the Uncle L L cool J train. It was so

944
00:46:46,800 --> 00:46:49,319
Speaker 2: cool and professional. Makai Pfeiffer gave me a big one.

945
00:46:49,360 --> 00:46:54,280
Speaker 2: Omar Epps gave me a big one. And then once

946
00:46:54,320 --> 00:46:56,920
Speaker 2: in Pensacola, I was at Bushwhackers and there was this

947
00:46:57,000 --> 00:46:59,600
Speaker 2: couple and I was in the weeds. I was like

948
00:46:59,719 --> 00:47:04,120
Speaker 2: seven tables of beach people, summer vacationers, people from Alabama

949
00:47:04,200 --> 00:47:07,160
Speaker 2: ordering well done steaks, and they don't want broccoli. They

950
00:47:07,200 --> 00:47:10,520
Speaker 2: want everything else. And you're like, okay. And this couple

951
00:47:10,560 --> 00:47:12,719
Speaker 2: that looked kind of chic and cool sit down late

952
00:47:12,760 --> 00:47:17,600
Speaker 2: forties and the guy goes, Scottie, we own a restaurant here.

953
00:47:17,680 --> 00:47:19,640
Speaker 2: This is for you, hands me a fifty dollars bill.

954
00:47:19,760 --> 00:47:21,800
Speaker 2: Before the meal even starts, he goes, We're gonna be

955
00:47:21,840 --> 00:47:24,160
Speaker 2: here for a couple hours. We're gonna order lots of food,

956
00:47:24,200 --> 00:47:26,600
Speaker 2: We're gonna order lots of drinks. If you can let

957
00:47:26,680 --> 00:47:28,200
Speaker 2: us know what the best stuff on the menu is,

958
00:47:28,320 --> 00:47:29,840
Speaker 2: we'll take care at the end. And at the end

959
00:47:29,880 --> 00:47:32,280
Speaker 2: they give me another hundred and they ordered like lobster

960
00:47:32,560 --> 00:47:35,680
Speaker 2: they ordered like prime rib. They ordered probably six drinks each.

961
00:47:35,719 --> 00:47:38,040
Speaker 2: They were just on this date night. There were restaurant

962
00:47:38,080 --> 00:47:41,640
Speaker 2: tours and they were the best. They were the coolest.

963
00:47:42,160 --> 00:47:45,800
Speaker 2: So yeah, one hundred and fifty dollars tip on probably maybe,

964
00:47:45,840 --> 00:47:47,479
Speaker 2: like I don't know, down there's pretty cheap. One hundred

965
00:47:47,480 --> 00:47:50,799
Speaker 2: and twenty dollars meal, whoa maybe more. But then they

966
00:47:50,840 --> 00:47:52,520
Speaker 2: told the general manager when they were leaving that it

967
00:47:52,560 --> 00:47:54,640
Speaker 2: was the best service they'd ever had, that was one

968
00:47:54,640 --> 00:47:56,160
Speaker 2: of the best meals they'd ever had. And so the

969
00:47:56,200 --> 00:47:58,440
Speaker 2: general manager came over and I got to eat upstairs

970
00:47:58,480 --> 00:48:01,800
Speaker 2: at the fine dining restaurant for free. Then night, what coolest.

971
00:48:01,960 --> 00:48:03,160
Speaker 1: That's so cool cool.

972
00:48:03,160 --> 00:48:05,840
Speaker 2: I didn't get their names, I could remember their faces,

973
00:48:05,880 --> 00:48:07,960
Speaker 2: but it was the most.

974
00:48:07,600 --> 00:48:10,640
Speaker 1: So when this is Bushwhackers, they're eating at Bushwack.

975
00:48:10,680 --> 00:48:12,200
Speaker 2: They're eating downstairs of Bushwhackers.

976
00:48:12,200 --> 00:48:17,200
Speaker 1: Bushwhackers. Hold on Bushwhackers has lobster?

977
00:48:17,600 --> 00:48:21,160
Speaker 2: Oh dead State. We had lobster fests every year during

978
00:48:21,280 --> 00:48:23,920
Speaker 2: the what was known as the gay weekend down there.

979
00:48:23,960 --> 00:48:26,560
Speaker 1: Breaking my brain about Bushwhackers.

980
00:48:25,840 --> 00:48:29,399
Speaker 2: Memorial Day weekend. It was a big gay weekend. All

981
00:48:29,680 --> 00:48:32,880
Speaker 2: a lot of gay men, mostly gay men from Atlanta,

982
00:48:33,080 --> 00:48:35,399
Speaker 2: and you know, running from all the Red States down

983
00:48:35,440 --> 00:48:39,919
Speaker 2: to Pensacola. Takeover Pensacola Beach. It's fabulous. So all the

984
00:48:40,000 --> 00:48:43,640
Speaker 2: managers put all the I was probably nineteen at the time.

985
00:48:43,760 --> 00:48:47,319
Speaker 2: All those cute guys out on the best seats. So

986
00:48:47,360 --> 00:48:49,600
Speaker 2: the waterfront seats, the best sections all go to the

987
00:48:50,200 --> 00:48:52,400
Speaker 2: cute guys. And we know it, and they know and

988
00:48:52,400 --> 00:48:54,600
Speaker 2: everybody knows it, and you just get hit on. But people,

989
00:48:54,640 --> 00:48:56,320
Speaker 2: you can get a one pound lobster, you get in

990
00:48:56,400 --> 00:48:59,400
Speaker 2: dewey sausage, you get red potatoes, you get half a

991
00:48:59,400 --> 00:49:01,520
Speaker 2: corn on the cop up, all for twenty four to

992
00:49:01,600 --> 00:49:04,439
Speaker 2: ninety nine, and so you'd sell just bags and bags

993
00:49:04,480 --> 00:49:06,560
Speaker 2: of lobsters. This is a lobster will It is incredible,

994
00:49:06,840 --> 00:49:09,960
Speaker 2: And we would make one thousand dollars every two nights.

995
00:49:10,000 --> 00:49:11,920
Speaker 2: You make five hundred dollars a night in the good section.

996
00:49:12,200 --> 00:49:14,800
Speaker 1: And this is like in the early two thousand.

997
00:49:14,920 --> 00:49:18,560
Speaker 2: This was two thousand and one, two thousand and one

998
00:49:18,600 --> 00:49:20,319
Speaker 2: or two thousand and two, and it was like.

999
00:49:20,440 --> 00:49:22,520
Speaker 1: I met Heyday right before nine to eleven.

1000
00:49:22,600 --> 00:49:25,839
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, pre nine to eleven. Nothing can go wrong

1001
00:49:25,880 --> 00:49:26,160
Speaker 2: in the.

1002
00:49:26,080 --> 00:49:29,040
Speaker 1: World, innocent as a country sky. He's making five hundred

1003
00:49:29,040 --> 00:49:30,279
Speaker 1: bucks a Nike and hit on.

1004
00:49:30,520 --> 00:49:33,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, going to up to tables, which this is not

1005
00:49:33,480 --> 00:49:37,719
Speaker 2: cast lobsters. Yeah, just getting flirted with, flirting with There

1006
00:49:37,760 --> 00:49:41,319
Speaker 2: was one table of I'm going to assume and you

1007
00:49:41,320 --> 00:49:44,400
Speaker 2: should never assume this life of gay men because it

1008
00:49:44,480 --> 00:49:49,600
Speaker 2: was during that weekend. They were wearing navy whites, but

1009
00:49:49,719 --> 00:49:53,880
Speaker 2: they were cropped at the chest, small navy caps on

1010
00:49:53,960 --> 00:49:58,239
Speaker 2: the sides of their head, navy whites, booty shorts, so

1011
00:49:58,360 --> 00:50:00,399
Speaker 2: I'm just going to guess that they were part are

1012
00:50:00,400 --> 00:50:02,560
Speaker 2: having a fun weekend. They were done for the festivities.

1013
00:50:02,719 --> 00:50:05,200
Speaker 2: But those guys were tipped like eighty bucks, Like they

1014
00:50:05,200 --> 00:50:07,879
Speaker 2: were so great. But yeah, I had never had one

1015
00:50:07,880 --> 00:50:10,920
Speaker 2: thousand dollars in my life ever because I was nineteen

1016
00:50:11,200 --> 00:50:13,200
Speaker 2: and then I made like two grand in a week

1017
00:50:13,320 --> 00:50:17,400
Speaker 2: during Lobsterfest. Yeah it was the best. It was great.

1018
00:50:17,600 --> 00:50:19,440
Speaker 2: But yeah, this one table I'll never forget me. It

1019
00:50:19,480 --> 00:50:22,960
Speaker 2: was the most like classy, swave sophisticated thing to be like,

1020
00:50:23,120 --> 00:50:26,000
Speaker 2: we're gonna hold this table for a few hours. Here's

1021
00:50:26,080 --> 00:50:29,320
Speaker 2: fifty bucks and like normally people down there tip ten percent,

1022
00:50:29,440 --> 00:50:31,240
Speaker 2: So it was incredible.

1023
00:50:31,600 --> 00:50:34,680
Speaker 1: Oh, I love that. I've never heard of tipping before.

1024
00:50:34,719 --> 00:50:35,680
Speaker 1: It all starts if.

1025
00:50:35,600 --> 00:50:37,120
Speaker 2: You're going to hold a table if you and I

1026
00:50:37,320 --> 00:50:41,120
Speaker 2: you mean, go out. We're going to celebrate somewhere and

1027
00:50:41,160 --> 00:50:43,479
Speaker 2: it's table service and we're gonna be there all night.

1028
00:50:43,800 --> 00:50:46,279
Speaker 2: If you go, we're going to hold this table. And

1029
00:50:46,320 --> 00:50:49,000
Speaker 2: you can think, what would two or three rounds of

1030
00:50:49,080 --> 00:50:51,239
Speaker 2: this table getting sack costs over the course of night.

1031
00:50:51,280 --> 00:50:55,040
Speaker 2: And you go, here's one hundred dollars we're celebrating. I

1032
00:50:55,080 --> 00:50:57,560
Speaker 2: think it's like I do it at weddings now and

1033
00:50:57,680 --> 00:50:58,960
Speaker 2: I go, I'm gonna go to a wedding at the

1034
00:50:58,960 --> 00:51:02,520
Speaker 2: ban Animals Julian iron is two days from now. But

1035
00:51:02,640 --> 00:51:04,520
Speaker 2: you walk up to the open bar bar ten and

1036
00:51:04,520 --> 00:51:05,959
Speaker 2: you hand them a twenty dollar bill at the stop

1037
00:51:05,960 --> 00:51:08,080
Speaker 2: of the night, and I go, I'm gonna be drinking

1038
00:51:08,120 --> 00:51:11,880
Speaker 2: all night. This is my date. And they find drinks

1039
00:51:11,880 --> 00:51:13,919
Speaker 2: for you. You walk up to that crowded bar and one

1040
00:51:13,920 --> 00:51:15,319
Speaker 2: slides right in front of you all night.

1041
00:51:15,480 --> 00:51:17,320
Speaker 1: Yep, no, I've done that many times.

1042
00:51:17,320 --> 00:51:19,719
Speaker 2: It's the best move in the biz. It does work.

1043
00:51:19,960 --> 00:51:22,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, all right, you want to I'll put us home.

1044
00:51:22,920 --> 00:51:24,360
Speaker 1: I'll send us home with this one.

1045
00:51:24,760 --> 00:51:26,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, baby, here it is Zelda.

1046
00:51:26,680 --> 00:51:30,800
Speaker 1: You did a good job, done by thousands of banana.

1047
00:51:30,480 --> 00:51:32,200
Speaker 2: I already know which one. It's good.

1048
00:51:32,280 --> 00:51:35,120
Speaker 1: Well you there's two that were sent in by a lot.

1049
00:51:35,440 --> 00:51:40,040
Speaker 1: This is not the dildos and lubes spewed all over?

1050
00:51:40,239 --> 00:51:41,600
Speaker 2: Is this the chess player one?

1051
00:51:41,880 --> 00:51:44,160
Speaker 1: It is not the chess wow, is not the chess

1052
00:51:44,160 --> 00:51:53,240
Speaker 1: player controlled by analoa. Yeah, this is a great podcast

1053
00:51:53,320 --> 00:51:55,799
Speaker 1: where all we we just get sent thousands. It's like

1054
00:51:56,239 --> 00:51:59,560
Speaker 1: the repetitiveness of like having to have a joke for

1055
00:52:00,600 --> 00:52:05,200
Speaker 1: a robotic anal beads that gives a chess player information

1056
00:52:05,360 --> 00:52:08,880
Speaker 1: from an AI, yes about how to play chess.

1057
00:52:09,000 --> 00:52:12,359
Speaker 2: Yes, I made so many Queen's gambit jokes it's unthinkable.

1058
00:52:12,400 --> 00:52:15,239
Speaker 2: I'm like, no, that's a queen's gambit. Did anybody order

1059
00:52:15,239 --> 00:52:16,120
Speaker 2: a Queen's gambit?

1060
00:52:16,320 --> 00:52:19,200
Speaker 1: I think I just kept saying, like a button robot

1061
00:52:19,239 --> 00:52:20,239
Speaker 1: that controls a man.

1062
00:52:20,360 --> 00:52:20,959
Speaker 2: We're in.

1063
00:52:23,960 --> 00:52:26,560
Speaker 1: It was a huge one. Then another one was it

1064
00:52:26,640 --> 00:52:30,880
Speaker 1: was literally a semi truck filled with lou and dildo's

1065
00:52:31,200 --> 00:52:35,919
Speaker 1: and it jackknifed and and spewed dildo's and lube acro

1066
00:52:36,040 --> 00:52:41,440
Speaker 1: Great story, great story. No, this is runaway Chimpanzee returned

1067
00:52:41,480 --> 00:52:43,839
Speaker 1: to Ukrainian zo on a bicycle.

1068
00:52:44,280 --> 00:52:47,279
Speaker 2: Yes, we did get this little lot. Yeah, they put

1069
00:52:47,440 --> 00:52:49,200
Speaker 2: a rain jacket on and put it on a bike

1070
00:52:49,239 --> 00:52:51,520
Speaker 2: and walked it back to the to a Ukraine zoo.

1071
00:52:51,680 --> 00:52:54,279
Speaker 1: It is exactly. The video is crazy. I have to

1072
00:52:54,320 --> 00:52:56,760
Speaker 1: post the video. Katie, please remind me to post the video.

1073
00:52:57,280 --> 00:53:00,520
Speaker 1: It is so this chimpanzee ran away and then they

1074
00:53:00,520 --> 00:53:04,960
Speaker 1: were like following him throughout the city and he would

1075
00:53:04,960 --> 00:53:06,759
Speaker 1: like see them and then they would come close and

1076
00:53:06,760 --> 00:53:08,920
Speaker 1: then he would like run away. Yeah, and then this

1077
00:53:09,000 --> 00:53:12,680
Speaker 1: woman finally gets down on her knees and takes she

1078
00:53:12,760 --> 00:53:14,800
Speaker 1: has a jacket for him because it starts to rain.

1079
00:53:14,680 --> 00:53:18,040
Speaker 2: And cooler people sometimes.

1080
00:53:17,400 --> 00:53:20,719
Speaker 1: Exactly, and then this chimpanzee just like is like, oh yeah,

1081
00:53:20,719 --> 00:53:23,160
Speaker 1: it's rain and walks right up to her, puts the

1082
00:53:23,560 --> 00:53:25,640
Speaker 1: rain jacket on and it's like this beautiful and they

1083
00:53:25,640 --> 00:53:28,400
Speaker 1: have a hug and then it cuts to.

1084
00:53:29,560 --> 00:53:31,960
Speaker 2: The best part is the video that just cuts.

1085
00:53:31,640 --> 00:53:37,560
Speaker 1: To a monkey riding the raid back to wherever he

1086
00:53:37,640 --> 00:53:38,200
Speaker 1: needs to go.

1087
00:53:38,560 --> 00:53:39,560
Speaker 2: Simply incredible.

1088
00:53:40,120 --> 00:53:44,000
Speaker 1: This was the you know, I'll give credit to Stars

1089
00:53:44,000 --> 00:53:44,600
Speaker 1: and Stripes.

1090
00:53:44,719 --> 00:53:46,960
Speaker 2: Stars and Stripes. I'm reading it four or five times

1091
00:53:46,960 --> 00:53:47,279
Speaker 2: a day.

1092
00:53:47,400 --> 00:53:51,280
Speaker 1: It's by lyrically. Oh, it's actually was originally posted Washington

1093
00:53:51,320 --> 00:53:55,680
Speaker 1: Post September seventh, twenty twenty two by lyrically lyrically.

1094
00:53:55,320 --> 00:53:57,880
Speaker 2: Great name, amazing lyrically wow beautiful.

1095
00:53:58,480 --> 00:54:01,479
Speaker 1: Yeah, chee, chee. The chimpanzee is Monday from Kharkiv Zoo

1096
00:54:01,480 --> 00:54:04,640
Speaker 1: and roam the streets of the northeastern Ukrainian city for hours.

1097
00:54:04,960 --> 00:54:07,520
Speaker 1: She kept a distance from keepers who are following her. Ah,

1098
00:54:08,160 --> 00:54:11,200
Speaker 1: all that sort of stuff, the taste of freedom. Yeah,

1099
00:54:11,440 --> 00:54:13,120
Speaker 1: I pretty much told you the whole story. Cheech you

1100
00:54:13,239 --> 00:54:18,040
Speaker 1: that on a zoo keeper's bicycle. The zoo's director, oliaskev

1101
00:54:18,480 --> 00:54:22,960
Speaker 1: Goriev told Ukrainian Poy broadcaster Suspolin that the chimpanzee was

1102
00:54:22,960 --> 00:54:25,600
Speaker 1: returned safely to its enclosure and is in good health.

1103
00:54:26,040 --> 00:54:27,800
Speaker 1: We're happy you're back there.

1104
00:54:28,120 --> 00:54:31,680
Speaker 2: Humans taking care of animals. We're always here for it.

1105
00:54:32,200 --> 00:54:35,200
Speaker 1: I want to say, let's make sure to include all

1106
00:54:35,320 --> 00:54:39,680
Speaker 1: three of those stories that we just quickly sometimes. Yeah,

1107
00:54:39,760 --> 00:54:42,080
Speaker 1: when we post this on Instagram, just remind us to

1108
00:54:42,080 --> 00:54:42,279
Speaker 1: do that.

1109
00:54:42,360 --> 00:54:47,920
Speaker 2: Katie, please keep sending those stories to the Bananas podcast.

1110
00:54:52,040 --> 00:54:55,279
Speaker 2: Keep sending those stories to the Bananas podcast or thee

1111
00:54:55,360 --> 00:54:58,600
Speaker 2: Bananas Podcast at gmail dot com. We love getting them,

1112
00:54:58,680 --> 00:55:01,280
Speaker 2: don't think you know, because we make fun of getting

1113
00:55:01,320 --> 00:55:03,960
Speaker 2: thousands of the same story that we don't want to know,

1114
00:55:04,120 --> 00:55:06,600
Speaker 2: but we do love local stories and we do love

1115
00:55:06,640 --> 00:55:09,759
Speaker 2: stories from around the world, so keep sending them from

1116
00:55:09,800 --> 00:55:14,000
Speaker 2: around the world. Thank you to Karen Kilgarriff and our

1117
00:55:14,040 --> 00:55:17,960
Speaker 2: other benevolent overlord Georgia hart Stark, everybody at exactly right,

1118
00:55:18,000 --> 00:55:18,520
Speaker 2: and thank you.

1119
00:55:18,520 --> 00:55:21,440
Speaker 1: Kurt, Thank you Scottie, and thank you to Katie Levine.

1120
00:55:21,440 --> 00:55:24,920
Speaker 1: Our wonderful producer and Lisa Maggott are very real human.

1121
00:55:24,719 --> 00:55:26,080
Speaker 2: In full human intern.

1122
00:55:26,960 --> 00:55:41,080
Speaker 3: Bananas am Bananas is an exactly right media production.

1123
00:55:41,239 --> 00:55:43,440
Speaker 1: Our producer and engineer is Katie Levine.

1124
00:55:43,880 --> 00:55:47,080
Speaker 2: The catchy Bananas theme song was composed and performed by Kahan.

1125
00:55:47,360 --> 00:55:50,240
Speaker 1: Artwork for Bananas was designed by Travis Millard.

1126
00:55:50,640 --> 00:55:53,480
Speaker 2: And our benevolent overlords are the great Karen Kilgareff and

1127
00:55:53,520 --> 00:55:54,880
Speaker 2: Georgia Hartstart.

1128
00:55:54,520 --> 00:56:00,160
Speaker 1: And Lisa Maggott is our full human not a robot. Intern.

1129
00:56:01,120 --> 00:56:01,680
Speaker 2: Isn't a