1 00:00:02,720 --> 00:00:05,880 Speaker 1: Hi. This is Laura Vandercamp. I'm a mother of five, 2 00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:10,200 Speaker 1: an author, journalist, and speaker. And this is Sarah Hart Hunger. 3 00:00:10,480 --> 00:00:13,480 Speaker 1: I'm a mother of three, a practicing physician and blogger. 4 00:00:13,480 --> 00:00:15,800 Speaker 1: On the side, we are two working parents who love 5 00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:19,320 Speaker 1: our careers and our families. Welcome to Best of both Worlds. 6 00:00:19,600 --> 00:00:22,400 Speaker 1: Here we talk about how real women manage work, family, 7 00:00:22,560 --> 00:00:25,800 Speaker 1: and time for fun, from figuring out childcare to mapping 8 00:00:25,800 --> 00:00:28,360 Speaker 1: out long term career goals. We want you to get 9 00:00:28,400 --> 00:00:33,920 Speaker 1: the most out of life. Welcome to Best of Both Worlds. 10 00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:36,880 Speaker 1: This is Laura. This is episode one hundred and forty eight, 11 00:00:36,920 --> 00:00:40,680 Speaker 1: which is first airing in early June twenty twenty. We're 12 00:00:40,720 --> 00:00:44,319 Speaker 1: going to do a mailbag episode again. This time we 13 00:00:44,400 --> 00:00:48,040 Speaker 1: ask for questions on our Instagram account a couple weeks 14 00:00:48,080 --> 00:00:50,720 Speaker 1: ago that's Best of Both Worlds podcasts, and you guys 15 00:00:50,760 --> 00:00:53,760 Speaker 1: responded with a lot of great questions. We couldn't use 16 00:00:53,800 --> 00:00:55,600 Speaker 1: all of them at the time, so we've decided to 17 00:00:55,920 --> 00:00:59,600 Speaker 1: go through and do some more. So, Sarah, how's it 18 00:00:59,600 --> 00:01:02,960 Speaker 1: going for you? It's pretty good. We're recording this a 19 00:01:03,000 --> 00:01:05,720 Speaker 1: few weeks before it airs, but hopefully not so far 20 00:01:05,800 --> 00:01:08,640 Speaker 1: that things will be markedly different at that point. You know, 21 00:01:08,760 --> 00:01:11,399 Speaker 1: we're round in the bend towards the end of the 22 00:01:11,400 --> 00:01:16,720 Speaker 1: school year, and yeah, just continuing to do our daily 23 00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:19,000 Speaker 1: routine for the most part. What about you guys, Yeah, 24 00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:21,039 Speaker 1: round again to the end of the virtual school year. 25 00:01:21,040 --> 00:01:25,039 Speaker 1: Well we don't finished until mid June, which, now that 26 00:01:25,080 --> 00:01:28,280 Speaker 1: it's all virtual, is just seeming a little bit painful. 27 00:01:28,560 --> 00:01:31,800 Speaker 1: But I guess it gives some structure to the day. 28 00:01:32,680 --> 00:01:36,759 Speaker 1: But you know, we're doing all right. It's getting nicer 29 00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:40,039 Speaker 1: and nicer here. May is always very beautiful in this 30 00:01:40,160 --> 00:01:43,040 Speaker 1: part of the world. May in June, so getting outside 31 00:01:43,120 --> 00:01:45,000 Speaker 1: a lot more, hoping for a few warmer days we 32 00:01:45,120 --> 00:01:48,760 Speaker 1: can do the pool. We actually, oh my gosh, I 33 00:01:48,800 --> 00:01:50,680 Speaker 1: sort of hate it when podcasts spend a million times 34 00:01:50,680 --> 00:01:52,720 Speaker 1: talking about the weather a million years, because I have 35 00:01:52,720 --> 00:01:54,480 Speaker 1: a few where they like always do it, and I'm like, 36 00:01:55,920 --> 00:01:57,960 Speaker 1: I'm not near you. And this was probably weeks ago, 37 00:01:58,040 --> 00:02:00,720 Speaker 1: but I got to say, we had this lovely rainy 38 00:02:00,800 --> 00:02:03,880 Speaker 1: day yesterday without lightning, which is very unusual, and the 39 00:02:03,920 --> 00:02:06,280 Speaker 1: kids played in the rain and it was great. So 40 00:02:07,080 --> 00:02:08,800 Speaker 1: if this is not a novelty for you, it may 41 00:02:08,840 --> 00:02:11,600 Speaker 1: not be as exciting for your kids. But don't underestimate 42 00:02:11,680 --> 00:02:15,160 Speaker 1: the joy of jumping through puddles, because I think we 43 00:02:15,200 --> 00:02:18,239 Speaker 1: spent longer outside yesterday than we have in weeks, mostly 44 00:02:18,280 --> 00:02:21,160 Speaker 1: because it wasn't too hot and just the novelty of 45 00:02:21,160 --> 00:02:23,800 Speaker 1: the situation. The kids were very excited. Yeah. Well, we 46 00:02:23,880 --> 00:02:25,440 Speaker 1: try to make the kids go outside for at least 47 00:02:25,480 --> 00:02:27,360 Speaker 1: an hour a day, and even if it's raining. I 48 00:02:27,360 --> 00:02:29,200 Speaker 1: mean we have porches. They can play under the porch 49 00:02:29,280 --> 00:02:31,560 Speaker 1: or play in the garage or anything if it's pouring, 50 00:02:31,600 --> 00:02:36,320 Speaker 1: and if it's just drizzling, then that's tough enough. Our 51 00:02:36,360 --> 00:02:42,600 Speaker 1: issue is that most rain comes with lightning on top 52 00:02:42,639 --> 00:02:44,720 Speaker 1: of your head too. That was a loud thunderclap. I 53 00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:52,680 Speaker 1: hope everybody's okay, it's true, it's true. Well, you know Florida. Right. Well, 54 00:02:52,680 --> 00:02:55,440 Speaker 1: speaking of activities, why don't we take the first question 55 00:02:55,480 --> 00:02:57,520 Speaker 1: from here, which is what are tips for getting your 56 00:02:57,560 --> 00:03:00,240 Speaker 1: kids enough activity during the day so they don't don't 57 00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:02,760 Speaker 1: get that crazy. I have to say these are not 58 00:03:02,800 --> 00:03:07,560 Speaker 1: either or they can have activity and still get crazy. Yes, 59 00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:10,000 Speaker 1: we have found that to be true as well, but 60 00:03:10,080 --> 00:03:12,960 Speaker 1: it does certainly help, and I think they go especially 61 00:03:13,040 --> 00:03:15,480 Speaker 1: crazy when they haven't gotten a chance to run around. 62 00:03:15,840 --> 00:03:18,440 Speaker 1: We usually do our activity in the morning, which I 63 00:03:18,560 --> 00:03:22,680 Speaker 1: recognize depends on school schedules and like, but none of 64 00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:24,560 Speaker 1: my kids need to be doing any live type of 65 00:03:24,560 --> 00:03:28,600 Speaker 1: schooling until ten am, and given our weather patterns weather, 66 00:03:28,639 --> 00:03:30,600 Speaker 1: once again, it is better for our kids to get 67 00:03:30,639 --> 00:03:33,399 Speaker 1: out early. They're usually aware that they're supposed to spend 68 00:03:33,440 --> 00:03:36,040 Speaker 1: at least one hour and if I'm working, our nanny 69 00:03:36,080 --> 00:03:39,120 Speaker 1: will take them outside and they will usually like either 70 00:03:39,200 --> 00:03:41,640 Speaker 1: ride bikes around the block and she'll take genevieven the stroller, 71 00:03:41,760 --> 00:03:44,240 Speaker 1: or they'll do some combination of like chalk drawing on 72 00:03:44,280 --> 00:03:48,720 Speaker 1: the driveway. Nothing crazy, and really there's no playgrounds or 73 00:03:48,760 --> 00:03:51,760 Speaker 1: any exciting places to go. It's just walking around the 74 00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:54,240 Speaker 1: kind of immediate neighborhood. But we're lucky to be in 75 00:03:54,240 --> 00:03:56,680 Speaker 1: a spread out enough place that you know, you really 76 00:03:56,680 --> 00:04:00,240 Speaker 1: don't run into anybody else for the most part, least 77 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:03,200 Speaker 1: we don't have to bother with masks and such. So no, 78 00:04:03,320 --> 00:04:06,560 Speaker 1: it's sort of just an accepted part of the day 79 00:04:06,600 --> 00:04:08,720 Speaker 1: for them. They know that they have to do that 80 00:04:08,840 --> 00:04:11,360 Speaker 1: before they're going to have access to their screen time later. 81 00:04:11,800 --> 00:04:15,640 Speaker 1: And then sometimes we'll do a second session in the pool. Again, 82 00:04:15,680 --> 00:04:17,960 Speaker 1: I know that's not an option for everyone depends on 83 00:04:18,040 --> 00:04:21,480 Speaker 1: climate and all that kind of stuff. But many people 84 00:04:21,560 --> 00:04:24,880 Speaker 1: in this area do have pools, so we're lucky enough 85 00:04:24,880 --> 00:04:26,560 Speaker 1: to have that option. I think if you didn't, maybe 86 00:04:26,600 --> 00:04:28,719 Speaker 1: that would be like that trampoline or swing set time, 87 00:04:28,920 --> 00:04:31,960 Speaker 1: or maybe more independent play in the yard if that's 88 00:04:32,040 --> 00:04:35,880 Speaker 1: available to My heart goes out to the city dwellers 89 00:04:36,080 --> 00:04:40,919 Speaker 1: who don't have as many options. Yeah, my neighbors actually 90 00:04:41,040 --> 00:04:43,760 Speaker 1: I think they bought maybe they're renting it, but it's 91 00:04:43,760 --> 00:04:46,359 Speaker 1: been there a long time, a bouncy house like you 92 00:04:46,360 --> 00:04:48,760 Speaker 1: would get for a party, and it's just been there 93 00:04:49,120 --> 00:04:51,599 Speaker 1: and they send their kid out and she bounces in 94 00:04:51,640 --> 00:04:54,640 Speaker 1: this house. So if I were in New York, i'd 95 00:04:54,640 --> 00:04:57,760 Speaker 1: probably put one in my in my apartment. Yeah, exactly. 96 00:04:58,200 --> 00:05:01,080 Speaker 1: Now we've said the kids have to run around outside 97 00:05:01,200 --> 00:05:04,280 Speaker 1: for an hour at some point in the day, and 98 00:05:04,480 --> 00:05:06,559 Speaker 1: as it gets nicer, like I said, with the pool, 99 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:09,200 Speaker 1: that's going to become part of the routine as well. 100 00:05:09,760 --> 00:05:13,320 Speaker 1: We do hikes on weekends. I would like to start 101 00:05:13,760 --> 00:05:16,600 Speaker 1: arranging the schedule to be able to do some more 102 00:05:16,640 --> 00:05:20,039 Speaker 1: of those during the week as well. The kids wine, 103 00:05:20,240 --> 00:05:25,640 Speaker 1: but well, it's usually people are happier once they're out 104 00:05:25,720 --> 00:05:28,440 Speaker 1: doing it. You know, nobody wants to turn off the 105 00:05:28,440 --> 00:05:31,599 Speaker 1: TV and go anywhere, but once you've forced them to, 106 00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:35,920 Speaker 1: they generally like being outside in nice weather and seeing 107 00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:39,040 Speaker 1: trees and all that good stuff. Splashing in a creek. 108 00:05:39,640 --> 00:05:41,560 Speaker 1: We have a couple of trails near our home that 109 00:05:41,600 --> 00:05:43,640 Speaker 1: we you know, gotten to use a lot more now 110 00:05:43,680 --> 00:05:47,159 Speaker 1: than we ever have before. So that's that's something we do. 111 00:05:47,200 --> 00:05:48,800 Speaker 1: And you know, just even running around the house, like 112 00:05:48,920 --> 00:05:50,680 Speaker 1: we send them into the basement, they can. I mean 113 00:05:50,680 --> 00:05:53,640 Speaker 1: we have a basement. I know that's not again everywhere, 114 00:05:54,000 --> 00:05:57,640 Speaker 1: but sending them downstairs to do that, it's good. We 115 00:05:57,680 --> 00:05:59,039 Speaker 1: have no basement. I was just going to add one 116 00:05:59,040 --> 00:06:00,960 Speaker 1: more thing, which is a little novelty items can go 117 00:06:01,000 --> 00:06:03,280 Speaker 1: a long way, like a fresh thing of sidewalk chalk, 118 00:06:03,760 --> 00:06:06,320 Speaker 1: or some bubbles, a hula hoop, a jump rope. Like 119 00:06:06,640 --> 00:06:09,280 Speaker 1: try to not to give them, you know, everything at once, 120 00:06:09,440 --> 00:06:12,000 Speaker 1: like oh look I just found this, and then you know, 121 00:06:12,120 --> 00:06:16,080 Speaker 1: order something else and give that out because I will say, 122 00:06:16,120 --> 00:06:19,080 Speaker 1: like just injecting one fresh kind of toy item or 123 00:06:19,080 --> 00:06:21,880 Speaker 1: reminding them, hey, let's scooter instead of bike, Like you 124 00:06:21,960 --> 00:06:24,120 Speaker 1: have to be creative and introducing variability or else they 125 00:06:24,120 --> 00:06:27,680 Speaker 1: get bored, but it doesn't have to be anything too crazy. Yeah, Well, 126 00:06:27,720 --> 00:06:30,120 Speaker 1: speaking of what playing with your siblings outside, our next 127 00:06:30,200 --> 00:06:33,320 Speaker 1: question is about the pros and cons of age gaps. 128 00:06:33,560 --> 00:06:35,479 Speaker 1: You know, we've talked a little bit about this before, 129 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:37,800 Speaker 1: but now that your kids are together twenty four to seven, Sarah, 130 00:06:37,839 --> 00:06:41,080 Speaker 1: how are you finding your your particular age gap. I 131 00:06:41,080 --> 00:06:43,359 Speaker 1: think ours are pretty good. I mean, but I have both. 132 00:06:43,440 --> 00:06:45,920 Speaker 1: I have a biggish gap and I have a pretty 133 00:06:45,920 --> 00:06:50,000 Speaker 1: small gap. And it's hard because it's not like I 134 00:06:50,000 --> 00:06:52,599 Speaker 1: have a control group where I have three close together 135 00:06:52,680 --> 00:06:55,640 Speaker 1: children or three really far apart children. I mean, I 136 00:06:55,680 --> 00:06:59,599 Speaker 1: will say, certainly Annabel and Cameron fight more because they're 137 00:06:59,680 --> 00:07:02,720 Speaker 1: less two years apart, and it's kind of hard to 138 00:07:02,800 --> 00:07:05,000 Speaker 1: fight with a two year old when you're several I'm 139 00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:06,280 Speaker 1: sure if I had a three year old, they could 140 00:07:06,279 --> 00:07:08,000 Speaker 1: fight with a two year old, but like even a 141 00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:10,760 Speaker 1: six year old pretty much sees the ridiculousness of fighting 142 00:07:10,760 --> 00:07:14,080 Speaker 1: with a toddler, like it just feels wrong. Our kids 143 00:07:14,520 --> 00:07:18,560 Speaker 1: do occasionally do not nice things to Genevieve, but they're 144 00:07:18,600 --> 00:07:23,680 Speaker 1: like immediately reprimanded for it, honestly, and they're quick to 145 00:07:23,720 --> 00:07:26,240 Speaker 1: realize the sort of ridiculousness of it. I don't know 146 00:07:26,280 --> 00:07:28,600 Speaker 1: when that changes, Like at some point she's not gonna 147 00:07:28,600 --> 00:07:30,800 Speaker 1: be able to get away with like everything, and then 148 00:07:30,840 --> 00:07:32,800 Speaker 1: that may change the balance of power a little bit. 149 00:07:32,840 --> 00:07:34,840 Speaker 1: Like I can imagine if they're five, nine and eleven, 150 00:07:34,960 --> 00:07:37,520 Speaker 1: things might look a little different. I don't know. I 151 00:07:37,840 --> 00:07:40,440 Speaker 1: do like the close age gap when like I guess 152 00:07:40,520 --> 00:07:43,400 Speaker 1: if I if I could have stomached having three kids 153 00:07:43,440 --> 00:07:46,440 Speaker 1: like really close together. I can see the benefits in 154 00:07:46,480 --> 00:07:48,640 Speaker 1: doing that, but I personally couldn't have done it. Like 155 00:07:48,680 --> 00:07:50,560 Speaker 1: I was not ready to have a baby when Cameron 156 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:52,520 Speaker 1: was a year old, so, which is kind of how 157 00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:54,320 Speaker 1: how when you have to get pregnant if you want 158 00:07:54,360 --> 00:07:57,559 Speaker 1: conan years are So it's kind of a mood point 159 00:07:57,560 --> 00:08:01,800 Speaker 1: because I will say, when they're young, a bigger age 160 00:08:01,840 --> 00:08:04,680 Speaker 1: gap is incredibly helpful, and when they get older, a 161 00:08:04,720 --> 00:08:06,800 Speaker 1: smaller age gap, I feel like it makes things easier. 162 00:08:07,720 --> 00:08:09,200 Speaker 1: They get to come in and go in that way. 163 00:08:09,320 --> 00:08:13,400 Speaker 1: Huh no, I say, I mean I have a couple 164 00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:15,800 Speaker 1: of different sized gaps too, but it's hard to know 165 00:08:15,840 --> 00:08:18,400 Speaker 1: because they're also older or younger than too. I mean, 166 00:08:18,440 --> 00:08:21,520 Speaker 1: so I have what is your smallest gap? Well, Sam 167 00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:25,520 Speaker 1: and Ruth are two years almost exactly a part. But 168 00:08:26,520 --> 00:08:29,840 Speaker 1: they wouldn't naturally be best buddies anyway. I mean just 169 00:08:29,880 --> 00:08:33,679 Speaker 1: being you know, very more girly girl and boy boy. 170 00:08:33,800 --> 00:08:36,640 Speaker 1: Like they do different things. I mean, they play together sometimes, 171 00:08:36,840 --> 00:08:41,800 Speaker 1: all of them do they The older four will play 172 00:08:41,880 --> 00:08:45,040 Speaker 1: together outside, and it's kind of nice that they will. 173 00:08:45,480 --> 00:08:48,120 Speaker 1: On the other hand, there's definitely some certain dynamics. My 174 00:08:48,400 --> 00:08:53,760 Speaker 1: five year old is a handful, and then he will 175 00:08:54,920 --> 00:08:58,559 Speaker 1: taunt and torment the bigger kids until they provoke a reaction, 176 00:08:58,880 --> 00:09:02,160 Speaker 1: and then of course he's sad and then they get 177 00:09:02,160 --> 00:09:08,720 Speaker 1: in trouble. It's like, you know, yeah, that is a 178 00:09:09,120 --> 00:09:11,840 Speaker 1: rather humorous dynamic. I'm sure it's not humorous. Well it's happening, 179 00:09:11,880 --> 00:09:14,360 Speaker 1: but no, but I get it. It happens all the time. 180 00:09:14,600 --> 00:09:16,880 Speaker 1: You know, like how many times can you taunt and 181 00:09:17,040 --> 00:09:19,840 Speaker 1: throw stuff at your big brother before he like hauls 182 00:09:19,840 --> 00:09:22,079 Speaker 1: out and pushes you, And then of course gets in 183 00:09:22,120 --> 00:09:24,680 Speaker 1: trouble because you can't push the five year old. But 184 00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:29,280 Speaker 1: and then Henry's just off in his own little orbit. 185 00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:31,800 Speaker 1: I mean, the baby's gonna be too young for anyone 186 00:09:31,880 --> 00:09:37,840 Speaker 1: to be particularly tight with him, I guess. But you know, 187 00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:41,679 Speaker 1: they enjoy. It's like having a pet almost in the house. 188 00:09:41,760 --> 00:09:43,480 Speaker 1: I guess is how I would like in that age 189 00:09:43,520 --> 00:09:46,679 Speaker 1: group which age difference. I totally get that. I mean 190 00:09:46,679 --> 00:09:48,559 Speaker 1: that was definitely Genevieve when she was younger as well. 191 00:09:48,600 --> 00:09:50,760 Speaker 1: She was the family mascot or pet because you're not 192 00:09:50,800 --> 00:09:54,120 Speaker 1: really involved in stuff, but they're super cute. So exactly, 193 00:09:54,840 --> 00:09:58,320 Speaker 1: so I guess our answer is definitely no, you know, 194 00:09:58,520 --> 00:10:01,319 Speaker 1: easy age gap or hard each So it'd be great 195 00:10:01,360 --> 00:10:03,480 Speaker 1: if there's like the perfect thing they're like, Yes, guess 196 00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:05,800 Speaker 1: what if you have them exactly this amount of part 197 00:10:07,400 --> 00:10:09,840 Speaker 1: they will play together perfectly and you will not go 198 00:10:09,920 --> 00:10:13,320 Speaker 1: crazy when they're infants. Wouldn't that be great? It would? 199 00:10:13,559 --> 00:10:17,520 Speaker 1: It would? So? Sorry, all right? Question number three. I 200 00:10:17,520 --> 00:10:18,920 Speaker 1: don't know if either of us are going to have 201 00:10:19,120 --> 00:10:21,480 Speaker 1: lots of wisdom for this, but maybe a listener could 202 00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:26,400 Speaker 1: chime in. How do I twin potty train during the quarantine? Well, 203 00:10:26,440 --> 00:10:28,480 Speaker 1: the upside is you're not going anywhere. I mean, I 204 00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:32,400 Speaker 1: guess that would be because the problem with to me, 205 00:10:32,760 --> 00:10:35,120 Speaker 1: the difficulty with potty training is that when you were 206 00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:37,640 Speaker 1: leaving the house, right, because then it's like, okay, well 207 00:10:38,040 --> 00:10:40,000 Speaker 1: is the kid in diapers or pull ups or are 208 00:10:40,040 --> 00:10:42,079 Speaker 1: they in underwear? Like at what stage are you? And 209 00:10:42,120 --> 00:10:44,960 Speaker 1: then you have to know where every restroom is in 210 00:10:45,000 --> 00:10:48,920 Speaker 1: this whatever wherever you're going, right, because you're going to 211 00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:51,640 Speaker 1: need it when they suddenly announce that they have to go, 212 00:10:52,400 --> 00:10:55,240 Speaker 1: Whereas if you're not leaving the house, I mean you 213 00:10:55,280 --> 00:10:58,280 Speaker 1: could just this is actually probably a good time to 214 00:10:58,360 --> 00:11:00,840 Speaker 1: do it. But I'm saying that as someone who has 215 00:11:00,880 --> 00:11:04,280 Speaker 1: never tried to potty train twins. So maybe our listeners 216 00:11:04,320 --> 00:11:08,520 Speaker 1: can chime in with their tips for multiples and things 217 00:11:08,559 --> 00:11:12,360 Speaker 1: like that, and there's definitely no one right way to 218 00:11:12,440 --> 00:11:15,520 Speaker 1: potty train. I will say that we tend to wait 219 00:11:16,679 --> 00:11:19,319 Speaker 1: on the older end of the spectrum, like close to three, 220 00:11:20,200 --> 00:11:22,760 Speaker 1: and that there is research I looked this up at 221 00:11:22,800 --> 00:11:25,200 Speaker 1: one point which shows that the later you wait, the 222 00:11:25,280 --> 00:11:28,640 Speaker 1: shorter it takes on average, And that's not going to 223 00:11:28,640 --> 00:11:31,760 Speaker 1: apply to any specific child that you're looking at. So 224 00:11:32,440 --> 00:11:36,080 Speaker 1: it has been usually a fairly short process because I 225 00:11:36,120 --> 00:11:40,040 Speaker 1: think they're generally more than ready by that time. But again, 226 00:11:40,040 --> 00:11:42,840 Speaker 1: I've only done this twice. I don't have a control group, 227 00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:45,400 Speaker 1: although I will say Genevieve like sort of expressed some 228 00:11:45,480 --> 00:11:48,319 Speaker 1: interest and then completely failed at around age two, and 229 00:11:48,360 --> 00:11:50,600 Speaker 1: I'm like, no, we're just gonna like do this later 230 00:11:50,720 --> 00:11:54,040 Speaker 1: like the other kids. So that's been our style. But 231 00:11:54,080 --> 00:11:55,920 Speaker 1: there's certainly not one right way to do it. And 232 00:11:55,960 --> 00:11:58,280 Speaker 1: I know people who have successfully trained like they're twenty 233 00:11:58,320 --> 00:12:01,600 Speaker 1: month old, so it can be done. So how about 234 00:12:01,600 --> 00:12:04,280 Speaker 1: we skip ahead to this one that's very relevant for 235 00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:06,800 Speaker 1: right now, which is how do I start work at 236 00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:10,520 Speaker 1: one pm? So a lot of our listeners know are 237 00:12:11,320 --> 00:12:14,120 Speaker 1: splitting childcare duties with their spouse. If, for instance, your 238 00:12:14,200 --> 00:12:16,680 Speaker 1: kids are in school or daycare and those are now closed, 239 00:12:17,920 --> 00:12:21,440 Speaker 1: you are then left trying to cover the day. And 240 00:12:21,760 --> 00:12:26,600 Speaker 1: so you know, the most fair thing for a two 241 00:12:27,280 --> 00:12:30,240 Speaker 1: career couple to do is usually to split to the day, 242 00:12:30,320 --> 00:12:33,640 Speaker 1: so one parent takes the morning, one the afternoon. You 243 00:12:33,679 --> 00:12:35,880 Speaker 1: may do the split at different points, depending on when 244 00:12:35,880 --> 00:12:37,920 Speaker 1: your kids nap or if they get up earlier, go 245 00:12:37,960 --> 00:12:40,520 Speaker 1: to bed earlier, whatever the case may be. But this 246 00:12:40,559 --> 00:12:43,880 Speaker 1: particular listener says she starts work at one pm because 247 00:12:43,880 --> 00:12:46,520 Speaker 1: she's on the am childcare ship, and she says, I 248 00:12:46,720 --> 00:12:49,880 Speaker 1: just want to crash after seven plus hours with kids. 249 00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:55,040 Speaker 1: So how does she suddenly motivate herself to get her 250 00:12:55,080 --> 00:12:59,560 Speaker 1: work done? So how do you get motivated to start 251 00:12:59,640 --> 00:13:02,520 Speaker 1: during your job after you've been up with kids and 252 00:13:02,600 --> 00:13:05,880 Speaker 1: chasing kids since six in the morning. So I think 253 00:13:05,920 --> 00:13:07,400 Speaker 1: this is a really good question, and I know that 254 00:13:07,480 --> 00:13:09,160 Speaker 1: a lot of people will probably have tips for our 255 00:13:09,160 --> 00:13:12,559 Speaker 1: listener as well who are in this situation. I think 256 00:13:12,679 --> 00:13:15,760 Speaker 1: the first thing you can do is know exactly what 257 00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:19,280 Speaker 1: you're going to do at one pm. If you are 258 00:13:19,400 --> 00:13:22,800 Speaker 1: sitting down trying to decide, I think that will burn 259 00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:27,960 Speaker 1: whatever sort of starting energy you have. So every day, 260 00:13:28,520 --> 00:13:31,719 Speaker 1: at the end of your shift, figure out exactly how 261 00:13:31,760 --> 00:13:34,760 Speaker 1: you want to start the next day at one pm. Like, 262 00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:36,640 Speaker 1: what do you have on your plate? What are you 263 00:13:36,679 --> 00:13:39,760 Speaker 1: mapping out to do from one to six or whatever 264 00:13:39,800 --> 00:13:42,440 Speaker 1: hours it is that you are working. What do you 265 00:13:42,480 --> 00:13:44,160 Speaker 1: need to tackle? What are the three most important things 266 00:13:44,160 --> 00:13:45,240 Speaker 1: you need to get done? What are you going to 267 00:13:45,400 --> 00:13:47,640 Speaker 1: do first? The first thing you do should probably not 268 00:13:47,679 --> 00:13:50,720 Speaker 1: be cleaning out your inbox, because you can do that 269 00:13:50,800 --> 00:13:52,680 Speaker 1: in bits and pieces at other times. You can do 270 00:13:52,760 --> 00:13:55,760 Speaker 1: that while the kids are, you know, running around doing 271 00:13:55,800 --> 00:13:58,000 Speaker 1: something in the morning. You can do that later at 272 00:13:58,080 --> 00:14:00,400 Speaker 1: night when you're really tired. But that focus block of 273 00:14:00,400 --> 00:14:04,160 Speaker 1: time you have should be, you know, totally allocated toward 274 00:14:04,240 --> 00:14:07,319 Speaker 1: your most important tasks, know what those are going in 275 00:14:07,400 --> 00:14:10,559 Speaker 1: so you don't burn that initial energy. Deciding it might 276 00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:15,680 Speaker 1: help to have some very short transition ritual. Obviously you're 277 00:14:15,679 --> 00:14:18,040 Speaker 1: not going to have the liberty of the freedom of 278 00:14:18,080 --> 00:14:20,360 Speaker 1: like a half hour ritual because that burns a big 279 00:14:20,440 --> 00:14:23,600 Speaker 1: chunk of the time you do have. But something that 280 00:14:23,640 --> 00:14:25,920 Speaker 1: tells you now it is work time. So maybe it's 281 00:14:25,960 --> 00:14:29,400 Speaker 1: that you make a cup of tea, you know. Maybe 282 00:14:29,400 --> 00:14:33,840 Speaker 1: it's that you do a two minute meditation to kind 283 00:14:33,880 --> 00:14:37,800 Speaker 1: of calm yourself down. Maybe you can also have sort 284 00:14:37,840 --> 00:14:40,800 Speaker 1: of started transitioning with the kids at that point too, 285 00:14:40,800 --> 00:14:42,600 Speaker 1: if there's anything you can do that's sort of less 286 00:14:42,640 --> 00:14:46,080 Speaker 1: intense with them before you go into work mode, something 287 00:14:46,120 --> 00:14:47,960 Speaker 1: that makes you kind of more happy and energize. Maybe 288 00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:49,680 Speaker 1: it's that you went for a walk with the kids 289 00:14:49,680 --> 00:14:53,000 Speaker 1: in the stroller. Maybe it's that you've had sort of 290 00:14:53,040 --> 00:14:55,960 Speaker 1: story reading time right before that before your partner takes over. 291 00:14:56,200 --> 00:14:59,080 Speaker 1: But something to kind of be a little bit more 292 00:14:59,160 --> 00:15:02,640 Speaker 1: happy heads not doing anything that's going to make you 293 00:15:02,680 --> 00:15:06,000 Speaker 1: really upset or that is difficult for the kids right 294 00:15:06,080 --> 00:15:09,800 Speaker 1: before your one pm start might help as well. Sarah, 295 00:15:09,840 --> 00:15:12,400 Speaker 1: any ideas, Yeah, I would just add that, like, I 296 00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:15,720 Speaker 1: think there's a circadian element to this, not just the burnout, 297 00:15:15,760 --> 00:15:18,080 Speaker 1: but like that tends to be when humans get tired 298 00:15:18,200 --> 00:15:20,240 Speaker 1: is in the early afternoon. And I know there have 299 00:15:20,240 --> 00:15:22,200 Speaker 1: been more on one occasion where it's like I'm all 300 00:15:22,280 --> 00:15:24,120 Speaker 1: jazz for my morning session of work and then after 301 00:15:24,240 --> 00:15:25,800 Speaker 1: lunch all I want to do is like lay on 302 00:15:25,840 --> 00:15:27,720 Speaker 1: the floor. And I might be in the office, well 303 00:15:27,720 --> 00:15:29,360 Speaker 1: not right now but normally and I can't lay on 304 00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:30,960 Speaker 1: the floor, but it's what I want to do as 305 00:15:30,960 --> 00:15:35,120 Speaker 1: a human. So I agree with what Laura is saying. 306 00:15:35,680 --> 00:15:39,040 Speaker 1: For me, caffeine is helpful, so my ritual probably wouldn't 307 00:15:39,080 --> 00:15:40,960 Speaker 1: involve like a cup of coffee maybe at twelve thirty 308 00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:44,239 Speaker 1: to kind of get me started. The other completely haywire 309 00:15:44,320 --> 00:15:47,920 Speaker 1: outside the box option that I might consider if I 310 00:15:47,960 --> 00:15:50,440 Speaker 1: were in this predicament, and I know I'm crazy, but 311 00:15:50,520 --> 00:15:53,240 Speaker 1: would be to like work a four am to six 312 00:15:53,280 --> 00:15:55,440 Speaker 1: am shift and then take a nap at one pm. 313 00:15:55,760 --> 00:15:59,680 Speaker 1: I know that sounds nuts, but actually to me that 314 00:15:59,720 --> 00:16:03,320 Speaker 1: sounds more pleasant. So you know, there's more than one 315 00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:06,280 Speaker 1: way to do things. I also think that if there's 316 00:16:06,320 --> 00:16:08,880 Speaker 1: any negotiation with your partner that like two days a week, 317 00:16:08,880 --> 00:16:10,720 Speaker 1: you could have the morning shift, because I hear you 318 00:16:10,880 --> 00:16:13,920 Speaker 1: that would for me also much would be the more 319 00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:17,120 Speaker 1: preferred working time just for my body and brains rhythms. 320 00:16:17,520 --> 00:16:19,000 Speaker 1: Maybe that would be helpful. It doesn't have to be 321 00:16:19,160 --> 00:16:22,360 Speaker 1: every day, yeah, or you know, even one day a 322 00:16:22,360 --> 00:16:26,960 Speaker 1: week or something, but yeah, sympathies, it is hard to 323 00:16:27,000 --> 00:16:29,640 Speaker 1: get the shift where you are not as alert and 324 00:16:29,880 --> 00:16:32,160 Speaker 1: if you've just been coming out of having all that 325 00:16:32,320 --> 00:16:36,880 Speaker 1: kid time as well. Sarah Okay, lighter question. Good starting 326 00:16:36,920 --> 00:16:40,920 Speaker 1: point for a skincare routine? Ooh well, okay, First, I 327 00:16:40,960 --> 00:16:45,400 Speaker 1: would suggest listening to the Forever thirty five podcast. No, 328 00:16:45,480 --> 00:16:48,200 Speaker 1: I'm just kidding, although that's where I've learned. I feel 329 00:16:48,240 --> 00:16:50,600 Speaker 1: like some of the basics of the skincare that I follow, 330 00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:54,160 Speaker 1: so I am not an expert whatsoever. Or talk to 331 00:16:54,200 --> 00:16:56,640 Speaker 1: a friend that is super savvy at skincare, because you'll 332 00:16:56,640 --> 00:16:59,720 Speaker 1: probably get some passionate recommendations that way. I know that 333 00:16:59,800 --> 00:17:02,680 Speaker 1: I have, but I feel like, you know, the basics 334 00:17:02,720 --> 00:17:05,359 Speaker 1: are a good cleanser that does not have to be expensive, 335 00:17:06,119 --> 00:17:08,880 Speaker 1: some kind of treatment or serum that's active, whether that's 336 00:17:08,920 --> 00:17:11,199 Speaker 1: a retinol or a vitamin C or a lactic acid, 337 00:17:11,720 --> 00:17:15,680 Speaker 1: and then some kind of a moisturizer that goes over top. 338 00:17:16,320 --> 00:17:18,840 Speaker 1: A lot of times SPF fits in there as well, 339 00:17:19,280 --> 00:17:21,399 Speaker 1: whether you consider that a step in your skincare routine 340 00:17:21,480 --> 00:17:22,840 Speaker 1: or just sort of an everyday thing that you put 341 00:17:22,880 --> 00:17:26,520 Speaker 1: on top. Either way, I currently actually use a CC 342 00:17:26,680 --> 00:17:29,920 Speaker 1: cream that has SPF in it, which at least guarantees 343 00:17:30,000 --> 00:17:32,760 Speaker 1: me some SPF every day, even if I'm not going 344 00:17:32,840 --> 00:17:34,240 Speaker 1: to be outside for hours. If I'm going to be 345 00:17:34,280 --> 00:17:36,800 Speaker 1: outside for hours, I need something stronger than that. But 346 00:17:36,840 --> 00:17:38,280 Speaker 1: if I'm going to be outside for hours, I'm probably 347 00:17:38,280 --> 00:17:39,840 Speaker 1: not that worried about like my makeup eire as, so 348 00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:42,520 Speaker 1: we'll just slather whatever on top. So yeah, I think 349 00:17:43,000 --> 00:17:46,000 Speaker 1: investing in one product in each of those categories, it 350 00:17:46,000 --> 00:17:47,760 Speaker 1: doesn't have to be super fancy, and then trying it 351 00:17:47,800 --> 00:17:49,960 Speaker 1: and seeing what works for you. There are so many 352 00:17:50,400 --> 00:17:52,720 Speaker 1: mini sizes to be had these days, so you don't 353 00:17:52,760 --> 00:17:55,119 Speaker 1: need to buy a huge thing. I made a mistake 354 00:17:55,160 --> 00:17:58,080 Speaker 1: recently of trying like a different It was like a 355 00:17:58,160 --> 00:17:59,840 Speaker 1: face cream that I really liked from Fresh, and I 356 00:18:00,080 --> 00:18:02,160 Speaker 1: try the overnight version. I'm like, well, I like Fresh 357 00:18:02,200 --> 00:18:04,000 Speaker 1: so much, I'll just get the big one. And I 358 00:18:04,240 --> 00:18:06,359 Speaker 1: do not like the overnight version nearly as much as 359 00:18:06,440 --> 00:18:09,960 Speaker 1: the regular version, which is cucumber scented. So you know, 360 00:18:10,119 --> 00:18:13,320 Speaker 1: you got to experiment and go for the small sizes 361 00:18:13,520 --> 00:18:15,960 Speaker 1: and realize that none of this is going to work 362 00:18:16,040 --> 00:18:18,320 Speaker 1: magic and a lot of it is for your own pleasure, 363 00:18:18,680 --> 00:18:21,120 Speaker 1: and as long as you accept that, then you will 364 00:18:21,119 --> 00:18:24,120 Speaker 1: have fun with it and enjoy your skincare routine. Yeah, 365 00:18:24,160 --> 00:18:26,760 Speaker 1: it strikes me as something like a kid getting an art. Kid, 366 00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:32,640 Speaker 1: We'll try the different like oil pastels and the watercolors 367 00:18:32,680 --> 00:18:35,720 Speaker 1: and see what happens. And then you don't use happen. 368 00:18:35,840 --> 00:18:38,680 Speaker 1: Nothing's going to happen. You're just gonna have an enjoyable 369 00:18:38,760 --> 00:18:44,800 Speaker 1: ritual and maybe slightly softer skin, maybe maybe maybe. All right, 370 00:18:44,840 --> 00:18:48,160 Speaker 1: how about you pick the next question? Well, I want 371 00:18:48,200 --> 00:18:52,280 Speaker 1: to do the one you skipped ocuse we mentioned this 372 00:18:52,400 --> 00:18:55,120 Speaker 1: on a guest podcast recently, but I think it's worth 373 00:18:56,200 --> 00:18:58,240 Speaker 1: I just I've noticed that people stress over this, like 374 00:18:58,280 --> 00:19:01,560 Speaker 1: there are say what it is you're reading? Sorry? How 375 00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:04,120 Speaker 1: do you store and organize photos? I have so many 376 00:19:04,200 --> 00:19:07,040 Speaker 1: of my baby and it's overwhelming. And I've seen like 377 00:19:07,600 --> 00:19:10,680 Speaker 1: mammoth long blog posts an entire podcast devoted to this, 378 00:19:10,880 --> 00:19:14,040 Speaker 1: and I'm like don't. Just don't. Either dump them all 379 00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:15,960 Speaker 1: the Google photos and forget about them and make some 380 00:19:16,040 --> 00:19:19,280 Speaker 1: fun photo books once a year, or just realize that 381 00:19:19,440 --> 00:19:22,080 Speaker 1: you know you're posting Instagram, you're posting a Facebook Like, 382 00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:24,800 Speaker 1: your pictures are out there. They're probably not all going 383 00:19:24,880 --> 00:19:26,479 Speaker 1: to disappear. If you'd like to print some of them, 384 00:19:26,720 --> 00:19:30,280 Speaker 1: print some of them, Like it makes me sad that well, no, 385 00:19:30,440 --> 00:19:31,920 Speaker 1: if it makes you happy to devote a lot of 386 00:19:31,960 --> 00:19:34,280 Speaker 1: brain space to this, then like, please do it. But 387 00:19:34,480 --> 00:19:37,200 Speaker 1: I don't think people should stress over it. And my 388 00:19:37,680 --> 00:19:41,760 Speaker 1: comment in the guest podcast was like, thirty years ago, 389 00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:46,520 Speaker 1: you didn't have a perfectly organized digital photo collections, and 390 00:19:46,640 --> 00:19:49,080 Speaker 1: we seem to survive, and we still have memories of 391 00:19:49,119 --> 00:19:51,240 Speaker 1: the past. At least I feel like I'm satisfied by 392 00:19:51,280 --> 00:19:54,680 Speaker 1: the memories that are available. So there you go. Sounds good. 393 00:19:54,760 --> 00:19:56,399 Speaker 1: All right, Well, let's take a short ad break and 394 00:19:56,440 --> 00:20:11,440 Speaker 1: then we'll be right back. All right. Next question is 395 00:20:11,440 --> 00:20:13,960 Speaker 1: a little bit of a juicy one. I'll let you 396 00:20:14,040 --> 00:20:17,639 Speaker 1: answer this one. Okay, how have you reevaluated division of 397 00:20:17,720 --> 00:20:23,160 Speaker 1: labor or responsibilities in this mess? Yeah? Well, I mean 398 00:20:23,680 --> 00:20:27,919 Speaker 1: it also coincided with the fact that we have a baby, 399 00:20:28,359 --> 00:20:32,159 Speaker 1: right so I think that that has added to the 400 00:20:32,320 --> 00:20:35,520 Speaker 1: division of labor issues and that only one of us 401 00:20:35,720 --> 00:20:40,040 Speaker 1: is currently lactating, so that that's kind of all me. 402 00:20:40,960 --> 00:20:44,359 Speaker 1: But because of that, I don't do a lot of 403 00:20:45,200 --> 00:20:50,760 Speaker 1: other things. So Michael has definitely taken you know, the 404 00:20:50,920 --> 00:20:56,960 Speaker 1: lead on things like cooking and laundry and you know, 405 00:20:57,359 --> 00:21:00,440 Speaker 1: doing some stuff with older kids, like you know, he 406 00:21:00,560 --> 00:21:03,760 Speaker 1: and Ruth are reading through the entire Harry Potter series. 407 00:21:04,720 --> 00:21:08,960 Speaker 1: I don't think about her bedtime at all because I'm 408 00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:14,639 Speaker 1: usually dealing with Alex and Henry and so yeah, I 409 00:21:14,720 --> 00:21:17,680 Speaker 1: mean it's just but it's two things. That's one having 410 00:21:17,760 --> 00:21:21,920 Speaker 1: the infant around, and then it's also that Michael isn't traveling, 411 00:21:22,119 --> 00:21:24,720 Speaker 1: which is the first time that this has occurred in 412 00:21:24,840 --> 00:21:28,440 Speaker 1: our marriage, like that he has not traveled overnight anywhere 413 00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:33,680 Speaker 1: in months, and so it's like, wow, that has you know, 414 00:21:33,800 --> 00:21:35,919 Speaker 1: you start to see what it's like to have family 415 00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:39,000 Speaker 1: dinner every night. I didn't even know that was part 416 00:21:39,040 --> 00:21:42,439 Speaker 1: of our existence. But yeah, so it's not. I mean, 417 00:21:42,480 --> 00:21:44,600 Speaker 1: it's partly driven by the quarantine, but it's also driven 418 00:21:44,680 --> 00:21:47,920 Speaker 1: by the newborn. And then you know what happens when 419 00:21:47,960 --> 00:21:52,760 Speaker 1: somebody's job completely changes what they are doing. How about you, Sarah, 420 00:21:53,359 --> 00:21:55,320 Speaker 1: I don't feel like we've done any sort of conscious 421 00:21:55,800 --> 00:22:00,199 Speaker 1: renegotiation or anything like that. Part of it is, as 422 00:22:00,200 --> 00:22:02,639 Speaker 1: I've discussed, we still have some help at home, so 423 00:22:03,600 --> 00:22:06,680 Speaker 1: I don't necessarily, if anything, I feel like it's been 424 00:22:07,200 --> 00:22:10,360 Speaker 1: a little bit easier we've had My husband is working less. 425 00:22:10,440 --> 00:22:13,600 Speaker 1: I mean, we've also had more family dinners, and thankfully, 426 00:22:14,280 --> 00:22:18,640 Speaker 1: you know, he's not like disappearing afterwards to work because 427 00:22:18,680 --> 00:22:20,800 Speaker 1: he's not as behind non charts than he as he 428 00:22:20,920 --> 00:22:23,920 Speaker 1: used to be. So I would say, if anything, it's 429 00:22:23,960 --> 00:22:25,840 Speaker 1: been really good. Like I've thought of our last few 430 00:22:25,880 --> 00:22:28,240 Speaker 1: weekends where if neither of us is on call, it's 431 00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:32,040 Speaker 1: actually quite relaxing. So I don't have a ton to 432 00:22:32,119 --> 00:22:34,399 Speaker 1: add here. I know that, you know, every situation is 433 00:22:34,480 --> 00:22:38,399 Speaker 1: going to be really different, especially if job responsibilities are 434 00:22:38,440 --> 00:22:41,439 Speaker 1: more one sided, like, for example, if I was working 435 00:22:41,560 --> 00:22:43,200 Speaker 1: much more and he was working much less, and we 436 00:22:43,280 --> 00:22:47,280 Speaker 1: were having trouble adjusting to that. But in our particular situation, 437 00:22:48,280 --> 00:22:51,480 Speaker 1: it's kind of naturally fallen into probably a more equitable 438 00:22:51,760 --> 00:22:54,720 Speaker 1: split than things are usually just because he's home more. 439 00:22:54,840 --> 00:22:58,560 Speaker 1: So I am grateful for that. I do sometimes wish 440 00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:01,879 Speaker 1: it's not the only person lactating. I would like to 441 00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:04,520 Speaker 1: I would like to share that division of labor. But 442 00:23:04,640 --> 00:23:10,119 Speaker 1: oh well, soon enough changes in time tracking again. So 443 00:23:10,280 --> 00:23:12,640 Speaker 1: somebody asked, what changes in time tracking do I see 444 00:23:12,640 --> 00:23:14,760 Speaker 1: on my logs during shelter in place? Well, I mean 445 00:23:14,840 --> 00:23:18,120 Speaker 1: we're not going anywhere right like that. I'm just at 446 00:23:18,160 --> 00:23:22,320 Speaker 1: the house all the time. I mean, that's honestly the 447 00:23:22,359 --> 00:23:26,080 Speaker 1: biggest difference. That there's no running people back and forth, 448 00:23:26,920 --> 00:23:29,240 Speaker 1: you know, and having a newborn, so there's that very 449 00:23:29,400 --> 00:23:32,600 Speaker 1: strong every three three and a half hour cycle that 450 00:23:33,320 --> 00:23:36,920 Speaker 1: you know, especially because we are not going anywhere, the 451 00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:39,879 Speaker 1: cycle is very very apparent in a way that it 452 00:23:39,920 --> 00:23:42,800 Speaker 1: would have been off or we would have had to 453 00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:46,320 Speaker 1: try to keep matching or whatever with running around places. 454 00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:49,119 Speaker 1: But now just you know, okay, yes it's time for 455 00:23:49,240 --> 00:23:50,879 Speaker 1: his sleep in this part of the cycle, it's time 456 00:23:50,920 --> 00:23:54,520 Speaker 1: first eating, So that's been very apparent in there. All right. 457 00:23:55,040 --> 00:23:57,520 Speaker 1: This is all just making me remember, well, as if 458 00:23:57,560 --> 00:23:59,560 Speaker 1: I needed reminding, because I talked to my sister a lot, 459 00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:02,760 Speaker 1: how I feel like I'm experiencing my fourth baby vicariously 460 00:24:02,800 --> 00:24:05,720 Speaker 1: through her. But when you have a young baby, it 461 00:24:05,920 --> 00:24:10,000 Speaker 1: really really dominates your experience, even if there's a lockdown, 462 00:24:10,280 --> 00:24:12,960 Speaker 1: you may not really notice that much because you'd be 463 00:24:13,000 --> 00:24:15,200 Speaker 1: locked down anyway, and you're still focused on the baby 464 00:24:15,359 --> 00:24:18,960 Speaker 1: so mad. And it really is actually easy to forget 465 00:24:19,040 --> 00:24:22,560 Speaker 1: that when things settle into an easier routine. I guess 466 00:24:22,560 --> 00:24:25,959 Speaker 1: that's why people keep having babies. Totally forgotten. But it's 467 00:24:26,040 --> 00:24:29,000 Speaker 1: really really hard, and so message to those of you 468 00:24:29,119 --> 00:24:30,840 Speaker 1: out there who have like four month olds or six 469 00:24:30,880 --> 00:24:33,320 Speaker 1: month olds and are like, god, why am I you know, 470 00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:35,960 Speaker 1: why does this feel so hard? Because it's really hard. 471 00:24:36,240 --> 00:24:39,879 Speaker 1: It's really really hard. Okay, digression just wanted to Yeah, no, 472 00:24:40,080 --> 00:24:42,800 Speaker 1: I mean honestly, looking at my logs, it's like everything 473 00:24:42,880 --> 00:24:46,840 Speaker 1: it's you know, work slash feed age, Like I think 474 00:24:46,920 --> 00:24:50,320 Speaker 1: that is much of my much of my time. I'm 475 00:24:50,359 --> 00:24:53,479 Speaker 1: like holding the baby and typing with one hand anyway, 476 00:24:53,520 --> 00:24:55,080 Speaker 1: and you're up at night too, and so there you go. 477 00:24:56,119 --> 00:24:59,720 Speaker 1: All right, This is kind of a non COVID question. 478 00:25:00,119 --> 00:25:02,840 Speaker 1: This is more general, like, pretend we're not going through this. 479 00:25:03,200 --> 00:25:06,560 Speaker 1: What would what in a more ideal world if you 480 00:25:06,680 --> 00:25:08,159 Speaker 1: had a nanny, what would you do with them when 481 00:25:08,200 --> 00:25:10,960 Speaker 1: the kids are at school but not a full working day. 482 00:25:11,560 --> 00:25:14,040 Speaker 1: And I'll say, there's you know, there's two variations to this. 483 00:25:14,240 --> 00:25:16,560 Speaker 1: I have a lot of friends who when their kids 484 00:25:16,600 --> 00:25:20,240 Speaker 1: reached school age, they no longer felt like they needed 485 00:25:20,240 --> 00:25:22,160 Speaker 1: a full time nanny, and they just hired a part 486 00:25:22,200 --> 00:25:25,080 Speaker 1: time person. I will say I feel like those people 487 00:25:25,160 --> 00:25:29,360 Speaker 1: struggled with turnover commitment a lot more than people who 488 00:25:29,560 --> 00:25:32,200 Speaker 1: had a full time nanny, which was providing somebody with 489 00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:36,240 Speaker 1: like a full time job. The other variation is to 490 00:25:36,320 --> 00:25:39,160 Speaker 1: turn your nanny into kind of a more flexible household 491 00:25:39,200 --> 00:25:42,159 Speaker 1: manager slash childcare provider situation, which is what we did 492 00:25:42,760 --> 00:25:45,720 Speaker 1: and what I feel like I'm going to continue to 493 00:25:45,840 --> 00:25:49,680 Speaker 1: need for probably a number of years going forward. I 494 00:25:49,760 --> 00:25:53,320 Speaker 1: don't really have a clear endpoint at this time. I mean, 495 00:25:53,359 --> 00:25:55,359 Speaker 1: of course it's a large expense. Would I love to 496 00:25:55,400 --> 00:25:57,399 Speaker 1: be putting all that money into five twenty nine at 497 00:25:57,440 --> 00:26:01,240 Speaker 1: some point, Yes, But my husband and I have jobs 498 00:26:01,320 --> 00:26:05,399 Speaker 1: where I still feel like it's not it's not terribly 499 00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:08,440 Speaker 1: appropriate for a physician to like cancel a day of 500 00:26:08,520 --> 00:26:11,760 Speaker 1: patience because their kids are sick, not sick sick, but 501 00:26:11,920 --> 00:26:14,600 Speaker 1: like have the sniffles. Some may beg to differ, and 502 00:26:14,920 --> 00:26:17,920 Speaker 1: that's okay if that's kind of more how you live 503 00:26:18,000 --> 00:26:20,760 Speaker 1: and you're willing to handle the if there are any 504 00:26:20,800 --> 00:26:23,000 Speaker 1: career consequences to that. Do I think it's sad that 505 00:26:23,080 --> 00:26:25,120 Speaker 1: we live in a society where there could be career 506 00:26:25,200 --> 00:26:27,960 Speaker 1: consequences to that. Yeah, maybe a little bit. But at 507 00:26:28,000 --> 00:26:30,480 Speaker 1: the same time, I feel like, well I do, in 508 00:26:30,600 --> 00:26:34,040 Speaker 1: my particular situation, have the means to have someone help 509 00:26:34,080 --> 00:26:38,119 Speaker 1: me smooth over those kinds of scenarios, and so I 510 00:26:38,440 --> 00:26:41,280 Speaker 1: plan on continuing to do so for the foreseeable future. 511 00:26:41,880 --> 00:26:45,760 Speaker 1: And ar Nanni has made my life easier in myriad ways, 512 00:26:45,840 --> 00:26:49,399 Speaker 1: not just childcare, I mean laundry, keeping the house picked up, 513 00:26:49,480 --> 00:26:52,040 Speaker 1: running the again we're talking about like non COVID time, 514 00:26:52,080 --> 00:26:54,320 Speaker 1: and there's no homeschooling and stuff, you know, the random 515 00:26:54,440 --> 00:26:57,840 Speaker 1: errand or like just lots of random things. And it 516 00:26:57,920 --> 00:26:59,920 Speaker 1: means that again, if my kid has a runny nose 517 00:27:00,200 --> 00:27:03,280 Speaker 1: or there's the fifteenth, you know, teacher work day or 518 00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:05,920 Speaker 1: early pickup, I don't have to stress out about it. 519 00:27:06,320 --> 00:27:09,280 Speaker 1: And finally, it's allowed my kids to do some activities. Now. Again, 520 00:27:09,280 --> 00:27:10,800 Speaker 1: I've talked about how we're going to do less in 521 00:27:10,840 --> 00:27:13,680 Speaker 1: the future and I am sticking to that. But it 522 00:27:13,680 --> 00:27:15,200 Speaker 1: would have been very hard if one of my kids 523 00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:17,280 Speaker 1: wanted to play a sport where they were expected to 524 00:27:17,320 --> 00:27:19,480 Speaker 1: be there at like four thirty in the afternoon. That's 525 00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:21,280 Speaker 1: not something that's feasible for my husband or me on 526 00:27:21,600 --> 00:27:25,120 Speaker 1: most work days. So childcare is where it's at. I'd 527 00:27:25,119 --> 00:27:28,439 Speaker 1: also point out that you can have full time hours 528 00:27:28,720 --> 00:27:32,240 Speaker 1: that don't entirely overlap with the school day, right, so 529 00:27:32,400 --> 00:27:36,280 Speaker 1: that if you are hiring someone full time, that person could, 530 00:27:36,280 --> 00:27:40,080 Speaker 1: for instance, start at eleven and go to seven for instance, 531 00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:43,040 Speaker 1: that that might be useful to you more so than 532 00:27:43,119 --> 00:27:45,159 Speaker 1: nine to five. If kids are already in school from 533 00:27:45,280 --> 00:27:47,480 Speaker 1: nine to two or whatever it is, and then you 534 00:27:47,600 --> 00:27:50,399 Speaker 1: have fewer hours, you have some that could then be housekeeping, 535 00:27:50,440 --> 00:27:53,560 Speaker 1: air and household management, and then have the extra time 536 00:27:53,600 --> 00:27:55,440 Speaker 1: in the evening to make life a little bit more 537 00:27:55,680 --> 00:27:58,720 Speaker 1: calm and help with the running kids around in food 538 00:27:58,760 --> 00:28:02,879 Speaker 1: prep or anything like that bed times. So it's not 539 00:28:03,119 --> 00:28:05,720 Speaker 1: entirely an either or like you aren't going to have 540 00:28:05,760 --> 00:28:09,080 Speaker 1: to necessarily cover all those hours, but having the a 541 00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:12,639 Speaker 1: little bit of additional time is definitely a big plus. 542 00:28:13,680 --> 00:28:17,000 Speaker 1: All right, So, Sarah, when dating, did you guys discuss 543 00:28:17,280 --> 00:28:19,520 Speaker 1: or agree on how many kids you wanted? Is it 544 00:28:19,600 --> 00:28:22,320 Speaker 1: okay to disagree where we had a recent listener question 545 00:28:22,560 --> 00:28:24,560 Speaker 1: somewhat related to this, So we went through that kind 546 00:28:24,600 --> 00:28:26,639 Speaker 1: of quickly because we had to get off the we 547 00:28:26,760 --> 00:28:30,560 Speaker 1: had to stop recording. But when you think this was 548 00:28:30,560 --> 00:28:32,000 Speaker 1: sent in by the same I don't think it was 549 00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:33,480 Speaker 1: sent in by the same person all though I guess 550 00:28:33,480 --> 00:28:38,320 Speaker 1: it's possible. So we did discuss it. I always talked 551 00:28:38,320 --> 00:28:41,719 Speaker 1: about wanting three children before I had any children. Then 552 00:28:41,720 --> 00:28:43,960 Speaker 1: after having my first child, I was like, actually two, 553 00:28:44,400 --> 00:28:46,360 Speaker 1: and then I changed my mind to three again. My 554 00:28:46,480 --> 00:28:48,880 Speaker 1: husband was always he liked the idea of three. He 555 00:28:49,040 --> 00:28:51,240 Speaker 1: was one of three. But then the funny thing was 556 00:28:51,240 --> 00:28:52,920 Speaker 1: I ended up having to kind of convince him a 557 00:28:52,960 --> 00:28:54,520 Speaker 1: little bit that we were ready to have a third 558 00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:56,720 Speaker 1: when I was ready to have a third. But I 559 00:28:56,720 --> 00:29:00,320 Speaker 1: would say we never had any major disagreements on I 560 00:29:00,400 --> 00:29:04,440 Speaker 1: feel like it would be a little tough. I don't 561 00:29:04,480 --> 00:29:06,360 Speaker 1: know how I would I would have felt about, like, 562 00:29:06,800 --> 00:29:08,240 Speaker 1: you know, if I really really wanted the third and 563 00:29:08,320 --> 00:29:10,880 Speaker 1: he really really didn't, that would have been a tough 564 00:29:10,960 --> 00:29:16,120 Speaker 1: moment for us because it's not something you feel half 565 00:29:16,120 --> 00:29:18,040 Speaker 1: heartedly about. Most of the time. I feel like you 566 00:29:18,200 --> 00:29:20,520 Speaker 1: kind of know, or at least that's been my experience. 567 00:29:20,600 --> 00:29:23,320 Speaker 1: Like I know, I feel done, and I knew I 568 00:29:23,400 --> 00:29:27,400 Speaker 1: wanted number three. So I feel like that's tough. And 569 00:29:27,480 --> 00:29:30,280 Speaker 1: that might even be like a place where a counselor 570 00:29:30,360 --> 00:29:32,800 Speaker 1: might help to just talk out feelings and stuff because 571 00:29:32,800 --> 00:29:35,080 Speaker 1: you don't want to You don't want to go forward 572 00:29:35,120 --> 00:29:37,320 Speaker 1: ahead without the other person, I don't think. But at 573 00:29:37,320 --> 00:29:39,040 Speaker 1: the same time, you don't want to harbor resentment in 574 00:29:39,080 --> 00:29:41,080 Speaker 1: ten years because you feel like you never fully worked 575 00:29:41,080 --> 00:29:45,720 Speaker 1: it out. Yeah, I mean, certainly, I think the real 576 00:29:45,840 --> 00:29:49,000 Speaker 1: issue here, I mean, if you're dating somebody and you 577 00:29:49,120 --> 00:29:52,680 Speaker 1: want children and they absolutely do not, or vice versa, like, 578 00:29:53,360 --> 00:29:57,880 Speaker 1: that's probably a deal killer. And so I mean, that's 579 00:29:58,000 --> 00:30:01,440 Speaker 1: really tough because you guys can completely love each other 580 00:30:01,600 --> 00:30:04,040 Speaker 1: other than that, but if you have an entirely different 581 00:30:04,720 --> 00:30:07,120 Speaker 1: visions of what your future is going to look like, 582 00:30:07,880 --> 00:30:12,960 Speaker 1: then that's not exactly something you're going to reconcile. So, 583 00:30:13,640 --> 00:30:16,160 Speaker 1: you know, I know some couples who have in fact 584 00:30:16,240 --> 00:30:20,480 Speaker 1: split over that, and it's horrible, Like you know, but 585 00:30:20,840 --> 00:30:23,760 Speaker 1: you can't. You can't force another person to change what 586 00:30:23,840 --> 00:30:26,480 Speaker 1: their entire concept of life is going to look like. 587 00:30:27,320 --> 00:30:29,640 Speaker 1: Us I don't know, we both come from I'm one 588 00:30:29,640 --> 00:30:31,440 Speaker 1: of three Michaels one of four. So I don't think 589 00:30:31,520 --> 00:30:34,360 Speaker 1: either of us were ever thinking that the number was one. 590 00:30:34,600 --> 00:30:36,480 Speaker 1: I don't know that we thought it was two either. 591 00:30:37,640 --> 00:30:41,400 Speaker 1: I'm not sure that either of us thought five starting out. 592 00:30:41,480 --> 00:30:47,440 Speaker 1: But here we are. So it's a wonderful, big, joyous household. 593 00:30:48,400 --> 00:30:52,720 Speaker 1: And I can't imagine it any differently now. And they're 594 00:30:52,800 --> 00:30:55,920 Speaker 1: all special, and I do love looking at your family photos. 595 00:30:56,280 --> 00:30:57,760 Speaker 1: It does not make me want to have five, but 596 00:30:57,920 --> 00:31:00,480 Speaker 1: I see the beauty and the fun, and like, how 597 00:31:00,680 --> 00:31:03,280 Speaker 1: awesome are your holidays going to be when the kids 598 00:31:03,320 --> 00:31:05,480 Speaker 1: are older. It's going to be amazing. So I hope 599 00:31:05,520 --> 00:31:07,240 Speaker 1: so I want to like each other. I mean it 600 00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:09,480 Speaker 1: would be sad. They're gonna love it. They're going to 601 00:31:09,520 --> 00:31:11,800 Speaker 1: feel very privileged to be part of such a clan. 602 00:31:11,920 --> 00:31:14,600 Speaker 1: I think. So that's I hope. So cool. Well, I 603 00:31:14,640 --> 00:31:16,440 Speaker 1: think that's I think this is the last question, or 604 00:31:16,440 --> 00:31:18,000 Speaker 1: maybe I'll just print it wrong. I think so, And 605 00:31:18,080 --> 00:31:20,240 Speaker 1: I think, well, there's one other, but you know what 606 00:31:20,320 --> 00:31:21,960 Speaker 1: this will be, This will be eleven. That seems like 607 00:31:22,040 --> 00:31:24,120 Speaker 1: a good round up. I want I want to ask 608 00:31:24,600 --> 00:31:27,440 Speaker 1: Sarah this because she has been far more systematic about 609 00:31:27,520 --> 00:31:30,560 Speaker 1: this than me ever, But Sarah, what are your tips 610 00:31:30,600 --> 00:31:33,800 Speaker 1: to build habits you want to do every day? I 611 00:31:34,080 --> 00:31:35,720 Speaker 1: was going to ask you this because you're the one 612 00:31:35,720 --> 00:31:38,800 Speaker 1: who does streaks of things. I will say for me, 613 00:31:38,920 --> 00:31:41,280 Speaker 1: writing it down is very very helpful and having little 614 00:31:41,360 --> 00:31:44,400 Speaker 1: checkboxes because actually, if I don't do that, I might 615 00:31:44,520 --> 00:31:48,000 Speaker 1: just forget. And then once you've forgotten once, then for 616 00:31:48,120 --> 00:31:51,480 Speaker 1: me it becomes like kind of sometimes that builds upon itself. 617 00:31:51,520 --> 00:31:54,000 Speaker 1: Although I'm not a super perfectionist in my habits either. 618 00:31:54,120 --> 00:31:56,240 Speaker 1: I keep this little like matrixes, and if there's little 619 00:31:56,560 --> 00:31:58,920 Speaker 1: holes in it, sometimes it's off. I even sent to 620 00:31:59,000 --> 00:32:01,600 Speaker 1: Laura like streaks stress me out if they get too high. 621 00:32:01,640 --> 00:32:03,920 Speaker 1: So I'd almost rather have like a miss day here 622 00:32:03,960 --> 00:32:06,720 Speaker 1: or there so that I don't start pressuring myself. I 623 00:32:06,760 --> 00:32:09,360 Speaker 1: don't know, so I think writing it down, I think 624 00:32:09,400 --> 00:32:12,560 Speaker 1: being intentional. I think mixing it up, like don't force 625 00:32:12,640 --> 00:32:15,320 Speaker 1: yourself to do the same, you know, try something for 626 00:32:15,400 --> 00:32:18,200 Speaker 1: thirty days, for example, because it can be overwhelming to 627 00:32:18,280 --> 00:32:19,520 Speaker 1: be like, well, I'm going to do this every day 628 00:32:19,560 --> 00:32:21,000 Speaker 1: for the rest of my life. Like think of things 629 00:32:21,040 --> 00:32:24,080 Speaker 1: as experiments, like I'm gonna try listening to some music 630 00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:25,880 Speaker 1: every day for the next month or so. If you 631 00:32:25,920 --> 00:32:28,200 Speaker 1: miss a day, that's okay, write it down, build it 632 00:32:28,240 --> 00:32:29,880 Speaker 1: into your plan, and then the next month maybe pick 633 00:32:29,960 --> 00:32:31,920 Speaker 1: something else to focus on. If a habit was good enough, 634 00:32:32,440 --> 00:32:35,800 Speaker 1: it'll stick regardless. So I don't know those are my things. 635 00:32:35,960 --> 00:32:38,200 Speaker 1: And read Atomic Habits by James Clear because I thought 636 00:32:38,200 --> 00:32:40,040 Speaker 1: it was pretty good. If anyone has not seen on 637 00:32:40,160 --> 00:32:44,000 Speaker 1: Sarah's blog her tracker, her picture of her habit tracker, 638 00:32:44,960 --> 00:32:47,240 Speaker 1: maybe you know she can post it again at some point. 639 00:32:47,320 --> 00:32:49,520 Speaker 1: It's on our insta. It can scroll through the best 640 00:32:49,560 --> 00:32:52,960 Speaker 1: of both worlds Insta. Yeah, so's it's very Ben Franklin. 641 00:32:53,200 --> 00:32:56,240 Speaker 1: It's the check each day that she's done her various things. 642 00:32:56,480 --> 00:33:00,200 Speaker 1: I know, flossing, whatever it is you're doing now. But 643 00:33:01,280 --> 00:33:04,040 Speaker 1: I actually started flossing like that back in like I 644 00:33:04,080 --> 00:33:05,880 Speaker 1: don't know, a year and a half ago or more, 645 00:33:06,000 --> 00:33:07,880 Speaker 1: and I still flaws every day, but I actually don't 646 00:33:08,160 --> 00:33:09,880 Speaker 1: track that every day. So I'd say that's like a 647 00:33:09,960 --> 00:33:13,160 Speaker 1: habit success story, Like I started to have to track 648 00:33:13,280 --> 00:33:15,080 Speaker 1: it and then I fully built it into my routine 649 00:33:15,120 --> 00:33:17,280 Speaker 1: and now I would feel really weird if I didn't flaws. 650 00:33:17,480 --> 00:33:21,520 Speaker 1: So there you go. You can. Yeah. So in my case, 651 00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:23,560 Speaker 1: I mean, I don't have a whole lot of habits 652 00:33:23,640 --> 00:33:26,160 Speaker 1: I do every day, though I did have that running 653 00:33:26,240 --> 00:33:30,360 Speaker 1: streak for eleven hundred days as it turned out. But 654 00:33:31,560 --> 00:33:33,800 Speaker 1: to me, what made it work is have it be 655 00:33:34,080 --> 00:33:36,720 Speaker 1: very small. I think that's what she's mentioned with the 656 00:33:36,720 --> 00:33:40,200 Speaker 1: atomic habits idea, that things are very small as a habit. 657 00:33:40,240 --> 00:33:42,040 Speaker 1: It's not trying to bite off more than you can chew. 658 00:33:42,120 --> 00:33:43,880 Speaker 1: But if something's going to be every day, it has 659 00:33:43,960 --> 00:33:48,040 Speaker 1: to be doable on not your best day, because we 660 00:33:48,160 --> 00:33:52,000 Speaker 1: don't always get our best days. So if you have 661 00:33:52,120 --> 00:33:53,600 Speaker 1: a habit to do every day, it needs to be 662 00:33:54,040 --> 00:33:55,600 Speaker 1: an amount you can do on a day that is 663 00:33:55,720 --> 00:33:58,920 Speaker 1: not going incredibly well. So that's why I only aim 664 00:33:59,040 --> 00:34:00,800 Speaker 1: to run one mile. I didn't say I was going 665 00:34:00,840 --> 00:34:03,280 Speaker 1: to run three four even though I did usually run 666 00:34:03,440 --> 00:34:08,320 Speaker 1: three or so. And I would also allow yourself some 667 00:34:08,480 --> 00:34:11,080 Speaker 1: sort of flexibility on when it happens. And now I 668 00:34:11,320 --> 00:34:13,479 Speaker 1: know that that might be harder for some people because 669 00:34:13,480 --> 00:34:15,640 Speaker 1: they need an actual queue, like, okay, now is the 670 00:34:15,719 --> 00:34:17,920 Speaker 1: time I do this. This is how I build this 671 00:34:18,040 --> 00:34:20,719 Speaker 1: into my life. But for me, it was more that 672 00:34:20,840 --> 00:34:23,040 Speaker 1: I know that I will run within this twenty four 673 00:34:23,120 --> 00:34:25,680 Speaker 1: hour period, but I'm not going to say when it is, 674 00:34:25,800 --> 00:34:29,359 Speaker 1: and that flexibility allowed me to keep doing it every 675 00:34:29,440 --> 00:34:30,920 Speaker 1: day because if I'd always said, Okay, I'm going to 676 00:34:31,000 --> 00:34:32,400 Speaker 1: run at six am, well, what if I don't want 677 00:34:32,400 --> 00:34:34,040 Speaker 1: to run at six am? What if something else is 678 00:34:34,040 --> 00:34:35,759 Speaker 1: happening at six am? What if you know I'm in 679 00:34:35,800 --> 00:34:38,000 Speaker 1: a different time zone. You know, there's just all sorts 680 00:34:38,040 --> 00:34:40,719 Speaker 1: of reasons that it wouldn't work. And so if it 681 00:34:40,880 --> 00:34:44,880 Speaker 1: was that rigid, I couldn't have made it happen. So 682 00:34:45,719 --> 00:34:49,120 Speaker 1: you know, I, for me, I thought it was allowing flexibility, 683 00:34:49,280 --> 00:34:53,160 Speaker 1: making it small, makes it more doable day in day out. 684 00:34:53,880 --> 00:34:56,400 Speaker 1: You have more habits than you are giving yourself credit for, 685 00:34:56,840 --> 00:34:58,800 Speaker 1: because you track your time every single day, and you 686 00:34:58,880 --> 00:35:01,719 Speaker 1: write a blog postlmost every day, and you write something 687 00:35:01,760 --> 00:35:05,279 Speaker 1: almost every day. So and you have daily podcasts. Well, 688 00:35:05,400 --> 00:35:08,680 Speaker 1: but that's I get paid for those. So I'm sure 689 00:35:08,719 --> 00:35:11,480 Speaker 1: many of our listeners go to work every day. Don't 690 00:35:11,520 --> 00:35:14,880 Speaker 1: think it's like whoa go meet. I got up and 691 00:35:14,960 --> 00:35:20,000 Speaker 1: went to work again. But the time tracking is pretty uh, 692 00:35:20,080 --> 00:35:22,320 Speaker 1: that's pretty impressive. That is a habit that I have 693 00:35:22,800 --> 00:35:25,200 Speaker 1: not managed to I've given them, but you've tracked their 694 00:35:25,200 --> 00:35:32,480 Speaker 1: expenses and that I have. I love it, but that's 695 00:35:32,560 --> 00:35:35,560 Speaker 1: fun for me anyway. All right, well, love of the week, 696 00:35:35,640 --> 00:35:38,360 Speaker 1: let's do a Love of the week. Then, oh I 697 00:35:38,440 --> 00:35:41,480 Speaker 1: don't have one, so you better go. I'm going to 698 00:35:41,760 --> 00:35:45,320 Speaker 1: have to do here. Well, you know, as I'm you know, 699 00:35:46,560 --> 00:35:48,560 Speaker 1: we're recording this in mid May, and this will not 700 00:35:48,680 --> 00:35:50,560 Speaker 1: be the case by June. But our tulips are all 701 00:35:50,600 --> 00:35:55,920 Speaker 1: blooming right now, and my husband, among his many talents, 702 00:35:55,960 --> 00:35:58,560 Speaker 1: has also turned into be a gardener. The cool thing 703 00:35:58,600 --> 00:36:00,720 Speaker 1: about the tulips, though, is you have to think about 704 00:36:00,719 --> 00:36:04,640 Speaker 1: it in October and in order to have tulips in May. 705 00:36:05,640 --> 00:36:10,080 Speaker 1: And so I'm loving that Hee did because I didn't 706 00:36:10,080 --> 00:36:13,440 Speaker 1: think about it. So we have all these tulip bulbs 707 00:36:13,600 --> 00:36:16,080 Speaker 1: that were planted in the fall. So that's exciting. I'll 708 00:36:16,120 --> 00:36:19,600 Speaker 1: just say that I'm continuing to love looking for various 709 00:36:20,080 --> 00:36:22,719 Speaker 1: nature in our neighborhood. There's much more than I ever 710 00:36:22,760 --> 00:36:24,799 Speaker 1: thought was there. Did you get the seak app? Did 711 00:36:24,840 --> 00:36:27,560 Speaker 1: you download the seakapp? I did download it. I can 712 00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:29,759 Speaker 1: you use it on photos? Because I feel like I 713 00:36:29,800 --> 00:36:33,200 Speaker 1: don't know, No, I think you have to have the line. Yeah, okay, 714 00:36:33,400 --> 00:36:35,719 Speaker 1: that'll that'll be my experiment for the week because I've 715 00:36:35,800 --> 00:36:37,120 Speaker 1: I was like taking pictures, and I'm like, oh, I 716 00:36:37,160 --> 00:36:38,400 Speaker 1: wonder if I can use that on the app, but 717 00:36:38,440 --> 00:36:40,719 Speaker 1: I have to actually open the app right then and there, Yeah, 718 00:36:40,960 --> 00:36:44,440 Speaker 1: kills the buzz a little bit. That's maybe, you know, 719 00:36:44,520 --> 00:36:46,520 Speaker 1: if you just give it to a child to do 720 00:36:46,680 --> 00:36:48,880 Speaker 1: real quick. You know, like they're saying, what is this? 721 00:36:49,160 --> 00:36:51,959 Speaker 1: What is this? Plant? Sure? I have some very eager 722 00:36:52,080 --> 00:36:55,000 Speaker 1: volunteers for that one too, exactly. All right, Well, this 723 00:36:55,120 --> 00:36:57,279 Speaker 1: has been Best of Both Worlds Episode one hundred and 724 00:36:57,280 --> 00:36:59,960 Speaker 1: forty eight. We have been doing an all listener mail 725 00:37:00,840 --> 00:37:02,879 Speaker 1: episode and we will be back next week with more 726 00:37:02,920 --> 00:37:07,120 Speaker 1: on making work and life fit together. Thanks for listening. 727 00:37:07,400 --> 00:37:10,120 Speaker 1: You can find me Sarah at the shoebox dot com 728 00:37:10,640 --> 00:37:14,359 Speaker 1: or at the Underscore Shoebox on Instagram, and you can 729 00:37:14,440 --> 00:37:18,680 Speaker 1: find me Laura at Laura vandercam dot com. This has 730 00:37:18,719 --> 00:37:22,000 Speaker 1: been the Best of Both Worlds podcasts. Please join us 731 00:37:22,040 --> 00:37:25,400 Speaker 1: next time for more on making work and life work together.