1 00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:02,240 Speaker 1: My friend and I hooked up once, but I can't 2 00:00:02,279 --> 00:00:05,080 Speaker 1: stop thinking about her. Wow, maybe you should walk it down. 3 00:00:05,400 --> 00:00:06,400 Speaker 1: So a little backstory. 4 00:00:06,440 --> 00:00:08,280 Speaker 2: We've been roommates for the past three years and I 5 00:00:08,320 --> 00:00:10,800 Speaker 2: consider her my best friend. We talk about everything, do 6 00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:13,760 Speaker 2: everything together, and we know almost everything about each other. 7 00:00:13,800 --> 00:00:17,959 Speaker 2: I've personally never had any legitimate same sex experiences, and 8 00:00:18,040 --> 00:00:22,160 Speaker 2: I don't believe she has either until now. Until now, 9 00:00:22,280 --> 00:00:24,880 Speaker 2: By the way, this comes from I hate PRP on 10 00:00:24,920 --> 00:00:26,599 Speaker 2: the ur slash Okay story times over it. Let's go 11 00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:29,640 Speaker 2: peer pressure. Peer pressure is ah. 12 00:00:29,640 --> 00:00:31,040 Speaker 3: I don't know if that's true. I just kind of 13 00:00:31,080 --> 00:00:31,520 Speaker 3: made that up. 14 00:00:31,560 --> 00:00:35,240 Speaker 2: Maybe I believe it. We're both single and routinely see 15 00:00:35,280 --> 00:00:39,200 Speaker 2: each other with guy friends at our apartments and always 16 00:00:39,200 --> 00:00:41,839 Speaker 2: talk about that stuff, and have never had any conversations 17 00:00:41,880 --> 00:00:45,240 Speaker 2: about anything other than a typical female male relationship. We'll 18 00:00:45,280 --> 00:00:49,000 Speaker 2: cuddle sometimes or make others slightly intimate contact, but nothing 19 00:00:49,040 --> 00:00:52,880 Speaker 2: I've ever considered outside platonic gestures since we're just really 20 00:00:52,920 --> 00:00:57,000 Speaker 2: comfortable with each other. I consider myself by curious. 21 00:00:57,880 --> 00:00:59,760 Speaker 4: So you only get curious twice a week. 22 00:00:59,680 --> 00:01:04,400 Speaker 1: Maybe for a month. Riley. 23 00:01:05,040 --> 00:01:09,280 Speaker 2: Riley just makes a bye joke at any chance possible 24 00:01:09,840 --> 00:01:12,959 Speaker 2: that is Riley's his, but. 25 00:01:12,920 --> 00:01:14,160 Speaker 3: He only does it twice a month. 26 00:01:14,319 --> 00:01:19,480 Speaker 1: Yeah, got it back. I'm not more like twice a day. 27 00:01:20,080 --> 00:01:23,200 Speaker 2: I'm not explicitly attracted quote unquote to other females, but 28 00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:26,520 Speaker 2: I've been watching some female on female corn and always 29 00:01:26,560 --> 00:01:34,720 Speaker 2: wondered what it's like. I guess, well, he's so progressive. Well, 30 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:37,400 Speaker 2: last night we were having girl time with some wine. 31 00:01:37,440 --> 00:01:40,959 Speaker 2: It admittedly got a little tipsy, nothing crazy or anything. 32 00:01:40,959 --> 00:01:41,160 Speaker 1: Though. 33 00:01:41,240 --> 00:01:43,080 Speaker 2: She had a flight this morning to go back home, 34 00:01:43,160 --> 00:01:45,560 Speaker 2: so her bed was cluttered with clothes and luggage, so 35 00:01:45,720 --> 00:01:47,600 Speaker 2: she just decided to sleep with me in my bed 36 00:01:47,720 --> 00:01:50,520 Speaker 2: since we were already in my room watching a movie. 37 00:01:50,720 --> 00:01:57,600 Speaker 3: Just was like, it's easier, and then she's like, dang girl. 38 00:01:57,960 --> 00:02:00,320 Speaker 3: She's like, wow, your bed, it's really comfortable. Maybe I 39 00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:02,200 Speaker 3: should just get rid of my bed altogether. 40 00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:04,400 Speaker 2: I was trying to pack these clothes, but maybe I 41 00:02:04,400 --> 00:02:07,840 Speaker 2: should be packing you up instead put you in my luggage. 42 00:02:08,080 --> 00:02:11,120 Speaker 1: Whoa dah, it makes sense. 43 00:02:11,200 --> 00:02:15,239 Speaker 4: But ing forward because I'm moving in to your box. 44 00:02:16,320 --> 00:02:19,680 Speaker 2: So there was a scene with an awkward kiss and 45 00:02:19,720 --> 00:02:22,360 Speaker 2: she started going off about something similar with a recent 46 00:02:22,440 --> 00:02:23,120 Speaker 2: date that she had. 47 00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:25,560 Speaker 1: All in good fun and all in good fun. We 48 00:02:25,680 --> 00:02:26,679 Speaker 1: decided to reenact it. 49 00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:29,880 Speaker 2: Paul, if you're just reenacting it all in good fun, 50 00:02:30,480 --> 00:02:30,760 Speaker 2: is that? 51 00:02:30,880 --> 00:02:33,440 Speaker 1: Actually? Is there anything such thing as if. 52 00:02:33,320 --> 00:02:37,080 Speaker 3: You're just reenacting kissing with your homies? Is that gay? 53 00:02:37,400 --> 00:02:41,000 Speaker 1: Can you platonically kiss? Yes or no? Right? Can you 54 00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:42,239 Speaker 1: platonically kiss? Yes or no? 55 00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:43,200 Speaker 4: Only on stage? 56 00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:45,840 Speaker 1: It's for chat. It's for chat to answer, and you'd 57 00:02:45,840 --> 00:02:46,320 Speaker 1: answer later. 58 00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:49,079 Speaker 3: So you think I think got it? Got it. 59 00:02:49,480 --> 00:02:51,640 Speaker 2: We've kissed before at a party as a dare or 60 00:02:51,680 --> 00:02:54,239 Speaker 2: some dumb crap, but nothing came out of that. Well, 61 00:02:54,400 --> 00:02:57,000 Speaker 2: long story short, we didn't stop, and kissing led to 62 00:02:57,080 --> 00:03:03,119 Speaker 2: touching that led to full blown spicy sleep. Whoa, and 63 00:03:04,360 --> 00:03:05,880 Speaker 2: it was effing incredible. 64 00:03:06,560 --> 00:03:09,480 Speaker 1: Oh my god, brag. 65 00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:12,200 Speaker 2: She was constantly making sure I was okay, checking in 66 00:03:12,280 --> 00:03:15,200 Speaker 2: before every next move. It just genuinely made me feel 67 00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:18,560 Speaker 2: very loved and respected throughout. It was almost hilarious at times, 68 00:03:18,600 --> 00:03:20,520 Speaker 2: and I was surprised at how natural it felt. 69 00:03:27,080 --> 00:03:27,760 Speaker 3: Plutonic? 70 00:03:29,440 --> 00:03:33,920 Speaker 4: What what explained? 71 00:03:34,240 --> 00:03:45,280 Speaker 1: Ohotonic? That's okay? Oh is that plotonic? It's okay? Sophia 72 00:03:45,440 --> 00:03:48,760 Speaker 1: literally can Riley don't let her shave you, bro, don't 73 00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:49,560 Speaker 1: let her shave you. 74 00:03:49,760 --> 00:03:52,240 Speaker 3: It's okay, It's okay, I can't spall. 75 00:03:52,040 --> 00:03:55,560 Speaker 4: Either, but you judge others that. 76 00:03:55,920 --> 00:03:58,400 Speaker 2: Yeah, right, clotonically. I love you and I would never 77 00:03:58,440 --> 00:04:04,640 Speaker 2: do that to you. Thank you platonically. So there was 78 00:04:04,680 --> 00:04:07,040 Speaker 2: really no awkward moments and we just got lost in 79 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,880 Speaker 2: the moment together. We ended up cuddling and fell asleep, 80 00:04:09,960 --> 00:04:13,240 Speaker 2: but never expanded on what just happened. I think that's 81 00:04:13,240 --> 00:04:15,400 Speaker 2: when the awkwardness set in, and we both kind of 82 00:04:15,440 --> 00:04:17,520 Speaker 2: just ignored it to not make it awkward. 83 00:04:17,600 --> 00:04:19,640 Speaker 3: No, that's going to make it so much more awkward. 84 00:04:20,040 --> 00:04:22,680 Speaker 1: Talk about these or we just ignore it until it 85 00:04:22,800 --> 00:04:23,640 Speaker 1: goes away. 86 00:04:24,040 --> 00:04:27,440 Speaker 3: A tried and try and everyone knows it words, it's 87 00:04:27,480 --> 00:04:31,160 Speaker 3: so perfect. If you just don't look at her, she 88 00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:31,880 Speaker 3: doesn't exist. 89 00:04:32,000 --> 00:04:33,200 Speaker 1: How can how can there be? 90 00:04:33,880 --> 00:04:37,120 Speaker 2: How can there be anything unresolved when you just ignore 91 00:04:37,760 --> 00:04:40,000 Speaker 2: all resolutions for emotions? 92 00:04:40,080 --> 00:04:43,520 Speaker 4: If you ignore your problems, the ninety five percent of 93 00:04:43,560 --> 00:04:44,280 Speaker 4: the time, go away. 94 00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:46,480 Speaker 2: That's what I've heard, best advice ever, That's why you 95 00:04:46,960 --> 00:04:50,839 Speaker 2: heard just like ope, so same thing this morning as 96 00:04:50,839 --> 00:04:52,560 Speaker 2: we rush to get ready and I dropped her off 97 00:04:52,560 --> 00:04:53,240 Speaker 2: at the airport. 98 00:04:53,520 --> 00:04:54,680 Speaker 1: We didn't talk about. 99 00:04:54,440 --> 00:04:56,880 Speaker 2: It and casually went on like we normally do it. 100 00:04:56,920 --> 00:04:59,240 Speaker 2: But I definitely felt like there was a five hundred 101 00:04:59,320 --> 00:05:02,640 Speaker 2: ton el in the room the entire time. What really 102 00:05:02,680 --> 00:05:05,520 Speaker 2: set me on an emotional rollercoaster was she kissed my 103 00:05:05,600 --> 00:05:08,360 Speaker 2: cheek goodbye, and the eye contact after she smiled. 104 00:05:08,480 --> 00:05:11,599 Speaker 3: Damn, Okay, it feels like you're ignoring it, and she's 105 00:05:11,720 --> 00:05:12,440 Speaker 3: just kind. 106 00:05:12,200 --> 00:05:16,160 Speaker 1: Of like hint her way into. 107 00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:18,440 Speaker 3: The I feel like she just thinks they're in a relationship. 108 00:05:18,480 --> 00:05:22,560 Speaker 3: Though she's like, yeah, oh, let me just sleep in 109 00:05:22,600 --> 00:05:24,239 Speaker 3: your room. We slept together. 110 00:05:24,400 --> 00:05:26,760 Speaker 1: She's just assumed, Yeah, I don't. We're here now, we're 111 00:05:26,800 --> 00:05:27,400 Speaker 1: not even. 112 00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:28,000 Speaker 3: Talking about it. 113 00:05:28,160 --> 00:05:31,520 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like, oh, it's just like awkward little thing. Ooh, 114 00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:33,800 Speaker 2: I see in the comments. Yeah, I see in the comments. 115 00:05:34,440 --> 00:05:36,159 Speaker 2: I can't get her and last night out of my 116 00:05:36,200 --> 00:05:39,080 Speaker 2: head and it's driving me, Cristy. I was looking at 117 00:05:39,120 --> 00:05:41,200 Speaker 2: my phone waiting for her to message me, like I 118 00:05:41,240 --> 00:05:43,520 Speaker 2: do when I first start talking to someone I really like. 119 00:05:43,760 --> 00:05:46,400 Speaker 2: And I'm not sure how to process these feelings right now. 120 00:05:46,520 --> 00:05:48,200 Speaker 2: How do I talk to her about this? I don't 121 00:05:48,240 --> 00:05:50,840 Speaker 2: even know how to begin to start the conversation with her. 122 00:05:51,160 --> 00:05:53,360 Speaker 2: I don't know what I'm feeling at the moment, although 123 00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:55,719 Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure this whole thing has unlocked a part 124 00:05:55,720 --> 00:05:57,920 Speaker 2: of me I wasn't aware of. I'm terrified that this 125 00:05:58,040 --> 00:06:01,360 Speaker 2: could somehow compromise our amazing friendship if I don't approach 126 00:06:01,360 --> 00:06:03,960 Speaker 2: it in the right way. And I'm completely lost. Now, Yes, 127 00:06:04,279 --> 00:06:06,440 Speaker 2: I want to do it again. Yes I want to 128 00:06:06,440 --> 00:06:08,920 Speaker 2: explore the side of me with her, and yes. 129 00:06:09,080 --> 00:06:12,200 Speaker 1: I find her attractive. Now what can I say to make. 130 00:06:12,040 --> 00:06:15,760 Speaker 2: This clear without the possibility of creating issues. There is 131 00:06:15,880 --> 00:06:19,120 Speaker 2: relevant comments, and there is an update three days later, 132 00:06:19,240 --> 00:06:22,000 Speaker 2: but we have to talk first. 133 00:06:22,160 --> 00:06:24,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, let's start with the poll. Let's start with the 134 00:06:24,080 --> 00:06:24,919 Speaker 1: pol sofiah. 135 00:06:25,080 --> 00:06:28,360 Speaker 2: Forty four percent of people say you can platonically kiss, 136 00:06:28,440 --> 00:06:32,240 Speaker 2: Fifty six percent say nah, which means which means it's 137 00:06:32,360 --> 00:06:35,440 Speaker 2: kind of split. Like half of people, it's pretty you 138 00:06:35,560 --> 00:06:39,440 Speaker 2: can platonically platonically kiss someone, which I on the glips 139 00:06:39,480 --> 00:06:40,080 Speaker 2: I disagree with. 140 00:06:40,760 --> 00:06:43,960 Speaker 1: On the lips that is that is the asterisk on platonic. 141 00:06:44,320 --> 00:06:45,919 Speaker 3: I don't know. I've heard. I have a lot of 142 00:06:46,080 --> 00:06:51,240 Speaker 3: friends who said they've done that. I personally don't think. I, well, 143 00:06:51,920 --> 00:06:54,360 Speaker 3: it's your own, because I would have to. I never 144 00:06:54,440 --> 00:06:56,600 Speaker 3: had to do a stage kiss, actually. 145 00:06:56,240 --> 00:06:58,640 Speaker 1: Stage kiss out the war short exception. 146 00:06:58,720 --> 00:07:01,120 Speaker 3: The one time that I was supposed to do it. 147 00:07:01,240 --> 00:07:03,359 Speaker 3: I like, I really didn't want to do it with 148 00:07:03,400 --> 00:07:07,320 Speaker 3: this person, and so I like weaveled my way out 149 00:07:07,320 --> 00:07:09,720 Speaker 3: of it by saying it didn't make sense for my character. 150 00:07:09,840 --> 00:07:10,080 Speaker 1: Wow. 151 00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:12,200 Speaker 3: My diructure was like, you're right, it doesn't. 152 00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:15,920 Speaker 2: I was like, yes, dude, nice, Yeah, but like okay, 153 00:07:16,040 --> 00:07:21,040 Speaker 2: like acting, yes, like but in a normal social environment. 154 00:07:21,440 --> 00:07:24,080 Speaker 3: But do you think there's an element of acting that 155 00:07:24,200 --> 00:07:26,200 Speaker 3: goes on in some social environments? 156 00:07:26,240 --> 00:07:31,160 Speaker 2: Don't even don't even try this right now, don't even improvisation. 157 00:07:30,960 --> 00:07:33,200 Speaker 3: Ichologically, and we're all acting. 158 00:07:33,640 --> 00:07:35,280 Speaker 1: Every time we go there. 159 00:07:35,800 --> 00:07:38,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, I think I think, like I'm just like trying 160 00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:40,960 Speaker 2: to run through all the scenarios and I'm like, even 161 00:07:41,200 --> 00:07:44,320 Speaker 2: even considering many many cultures that do do bbs and 162 00:07:44,360 --> 00:07:46,160 Speaker 2: like kisses on the cheeks and stuff like that, I'm like, 163 00:07:46,280 --> 00:07:49,720 Speaker 2: kissing on the mouth seems I guess it is ultimately 164 00:07:49,760 --> 00:07:51,800 Speaker 2: subjective to some people can. 165 00:07:51,720 --> 00:07:54,600 Speaker 3: Do it performatively, in which case it can be platonic. 166 00:07:54,800 --> 00:07:56,960 Speaker 1: Oh like like like the Dare Yeah they did. 167 00:07:56,920 --> 00:08:00,480 Speaker 3: Yeah, but I think it it really depends. It depends 168 00:08:00,480 --> 00:08:01,000 Speaker 3: on the situation. 169 00:08:01,120 --> 00:08:04,440 Speaker 2: Cro Queen says, tongue or not. I'm sorry, tell there's 170 00:08:04,640 --> 00:08:08,760 Speaker 2: there's no chance. There's no chance. But okay, so we've 171 00:08:08,760 --> 00:08:12,240 Speaker 2: we've we've discussed that. Let's what do we do here, Sophia? 172 00:08:12,280 --> 00:08:12,520 Speaker 1: What is it? 173 00:08:12,600 --> 00:08:15,240 Speaker 2: What is someone who's a resident expert? 174 00:08:15,520 --> 00:08:20,320 Speaker 3: Someone is a resident expert? OP goes to the friend 175 00:08:20,760 --> 00:08:24,520 Speaker 3: yes and says, hey, I like you that was real nice, 176 00:08:24,560 --> 00:08:26,800 Speaker 3: but we just haad, let's explore this. 177 00:08:27,040 --> 00:08:27,880 Speaker 4: How about that kiss? 178 00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:28,680 Speaker 3: How about that kiss? 179 00:08:28,680 --> 00:08:29,480 Speaker 1: About that kiss though? 180 00:08:29,640 --> 00:08:31,440 Speaker 3: How about that game last night? 181 00:08:31,520 --> 00:08:34,240 Speaker 2: And I think like OP does have the concern of like, 182 00:08:34,320 --> 00:08:37,720 Speaker 2: if we go into a relationship, what does that have? Yeah, 183 00:08:38,000 --> 00:08:40,120 Speaker 2: does that have any potential for it? And I think 184 00:08:40,440 --> 00:08:42,640 Speaker 2: I think they should talk about that and be like, hey, 185 00:08:42,920 --> 00:08:45,840 Speaker 2: is it worth Like obviously something could go wrong, Like 186 00:08:46,120 --> 00:08:48,680 Speaker 2: is it worth we we try this out and see 187 00:08:48,679 --> 00:08:50,560 Speaker 2: where it goes, and if they both feel like, hey, 188 00:08:50,600 --> 00:08:51,800 Speaker 2: why not, let's give it a shot. 189 00:08:51,960 --> 00:08:54,800 Speaker 3: I do think that they've already kind of like take it, 190 00:08:54,880 --> 00:08:55,640 Speaker 3: ripped off the. 191 00:08:55,600 --> 00:08:59,679 Speaker 1: Seal ready a little bit have but they haven't decided that. 192 00:08:59,760 --> 00:09:02,480 Speaker 2: I feel like there hasn't been communication yet of like 193 00:09:02,600 --> 00:09:05,319 Speaker 2: what could happen? We could you know, we get a relationship, 194 00:09:05,320 --> 00:09:07,040 Speaker 2: then we have a bad, you know, breakup, and there's 195 00:09:07,080 --> 00:09:09,360 Speaker 2: like okay, now we're living together and it's like does 196 00:09:09,800 --> 00:09:11,640 Speaker 2: like are we kind of like maybe okay with that 197 00:09:11,720 --> 00:09:14,040 Speaker 2: as a possibility, and like we just feels good. And 198 00:09:14,040 --> 00:09:16,120 Speaker 2: we kind of went just basically kind of just checking 199 00:09:16,160 --> 00:09:17,920 Speaker 2: in with each other to be like, hey, do you 200 00:09:17,920 --> 00:09:19,080 Speaker 2: want to keep going to try do you want to. 201 00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:21,240 Speaker 1: Keep going trap? Yep, yep, yep, Okay, let's do it. 202 00:09:21,320 --> 00:09:22,600 Speaker 3: All right, let's go ahead. 203 00:09:22,760 --> 00:09:25,800 Speaker 1: Just something as simple as that. I feel like, yeah, yeah, 204 00:09:25,800 --> 00:09:26,760 Speaker 1: I think that's what we need. 205 00:09:26,840 --> 00:09:29,400 Speaker 2: I think so I've known friends that were roommates and 206 00:09:29,440 --> 00:09:30,760 Speaker 2: then became a couple. 207 00:09:30,880 --> 00:09:33,240 Speaker 3: I know friends that were roommates and kind of became 208 00:09:33,280 --> 00:09:34,720 Speaker 3: a couple and it ended horribly. 209 00:09:35,160 --> 00:09:38,440 Speaker 1: I don't know how how mine ended. Story for example, 210 00:09:38,640 --> 00:09:40,439 Speaker 1: Oh I read story? 211 00:09:40,559 --> 00:09:41,400 Speaker 3: Well, yeah I don't. 212 00:09:41,640 --> 00:09:43,560 Speaker 1: But yeah, I think I think we're all in agreement there. 213 00:09:43,760 --> 00:09:46,840 Speaker 2: The plan is sit down and correctly communicate, right, Yes, 214 00:09:47,080 --> 00:09:49,120 Speaker 2: so next up is rather than comments, not even an 215 00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:49,720 Speaker 2: update rally. 216 00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:50,559 Speaker 1: Oh my gosh. 217 00:09:50,600 --> 00:09:54,600 Speaker 2: Puzzle headcase fifty five to forty four says bisexuality unlocked. 218 00:09:54,840 --> 00:09:59,439 Speaker 2: Opie says one hundred percent fully loaded bisexual. We're curious, 219 00:10:00,080 --> 00:10:03,880 Speaker 2: ah if we understand. Woski says, I once hooked up 220 00:10:03,920 --> 00:10:06,880 Speaker 2: with a friend for a little bit drinking was also involved, 221 00:10:06,920 --> 00:10:09,040 Speaker 2: and I was really sweet at the time, just like 222 00:10:09,160 --> 00:10:11,520 Speaker 2: she was as she was leaving, and then later had 223 00:10:11,520 --> 00:10:14,760 Speaker 2: this awful feeling that I ruined the friendship. It's less 224 00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:17,800 Speaker 2: complicated because it wasn't a same sex situation, but I 225 00:10:17,840 --> 00:10:20,040 Speaker 2: did ruin the friendship by being aloof. 226 00:10:19,800 --> 00:10:21,960 Speaker 1: Scared and a confused a hole about it. 227 00:10:22,280 --> 00:10:24,080 Speaker 2: If I were you, i'd just be honest about your 228 00:10:24,080 --> 00:10:26,719 Speaker 2: feelings when she comes back. What do we say if 229 00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:29,160 Speaker 2: she's not gone for too long of a time. She's 230 00:10:29,240 --> 00:10:33,640 Speaker 2: basically exactly what you said in the second to last paragraph. 231 00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:36,480 Speaker 3: I've never heard the shortening of graph. 232 00:10:36,840 --> 00:10:39,240 Speaker 2: I think we need to keep paragraph a full word 233 00:10:39,240 --> 00:10:41,599 Speaker 2: because graph is also its own word. 234 00:10:41,760 --> 00:10:43,520 Speaker 1: We cannot do that slight side. 235 00:10:43,800 --> 00:10:45,640 Speaker 3: You need to keep it to the graph. 236 00:10:45,840 --> 00:10:48,920 Speaker 1: Look at this crap. I'll say that nice. 237 00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:52,360 Speaker 2: You could do it on the phone too, depending on 238 00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:54,200 Speaker 2: how long she's gone, but I think it would be 239 00:10:54,200 --> 00:10:56,400 Speaker 2: better to be in person. And you're going to have 240 00:10:56,440 --> 00:10:59,080 Speaker 2: to figure this out either way since you are roommates. 241 00:10:59,120 --> 00:11:01,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, there's there's no way around. They can never just 242 00:11:01,040 --> 00:11:01,640 Speaker 1: not talk about it. 243 00:11:01,720 --> 00:11:03,840 Speaker 3: Yeah, you need to talk about it, regardless of whether 244 00:11:03,920 --> 00:11:06,480 Speaker 3: or not you're gonna get in a relationship, because it's 245 00:11:06,480 --> 00:11:07,199 Speaker 3: just could be weird. 246 00:11:07,240 --> 00:11:10,080 Speaker 2: If you live together, you're just gonna be like banging 247 00:11:10,160 --> 00:11:12,560 Speaker 2: every night, questioning every. 248 00:11:12,400 --> 00:11:14,320 Speaker 1: Day what are we are we? 249 00:11:16,080 --> 00:11:18,640 Speaker 2: Opie responds, she's gonna be gone for about two weeks. 250 00:11:18,880 --> 00:11:21,160 Speaker 2: I agree that in person would be best considering our 251 00:11:21,160 --> 00:11:24,280 Speaker 2: close relationship. I'm just afraid I'll go crazy waiting that 252 00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:27,160 Speaker 2: long because this has taken such an emotional toll on 253 00:11:27,240 --> 00:11:28,720 Speaker 2: me in the last twenty four hours. 254 00:11:28,800 --> 00:11:32,000 Speaker 3: Dude, Oh man, I forgot she was she was going 255 00:11:32,040 --> 00:11:33,480 Speaker 3: on a trip like the next day. 256 00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:36,440 Speaker 1: Crazy right, got all. 257 00:11:37,120 --> 00:11:39,840 Speaker 3: The airport jump over the gate. 258 00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:42,840 Speaker 1: As it is that a thing rosst she'll get arrested. 259 00:11:44,640 --> 00:11:46,760 Speaker 1: That ross was pretty TSA. It was true. 260 00:11:46,920 --> 00:11:50,560 Speaker 3: I know, I think that. I no, I believe it 261 00:11:50,600 --> 00:11:54,840 Speaker 3: was the Friend's episode or something. It like aired pretty 262 00:11:55,080 --> 00:11:57,920 Speaker 3: like right around right around nine to eleven, and they 263 00:11:57,960 --> 00:11:59,839 Speaker 3: had to I don't know. I think they like put 264 00:11:59,880 --> 00:12:02,840 Speaker 3: a like if the Yeah, I think there was a 265 00:12:02,840 --> 00:12:03,760 Speaker 3: disclaimer on it. 266 00:12:03,800 --> 00:12:05,400 Speaker 1: Wow, yeah, there you go, now tell it. 267 00:12:05,480 --> 00:12:08,120 Speaker 2: Novella says, I would just text her something simple like 268 00:12:08,240 --> 00:12:10,360 Speaker 2: last night was amazing. I'd like to talk to you 269 00:12:10,360 --> 00:12:12,240 Speaker 2: about it, but we can wait to get back. If 270 00:12:12,240 --> 00:12:14,640 Speaker 2: it's something you don't want to chat about over the phone. Effect, 271 00:12:14,760 --> 00:12:15,520 Speaker 2: that's a great idea. 272 00:12:15,640 --> 00:12:18,120 Speaker 1: Yeah. Always a nice preface, you know, is always good. 273 00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:18,760 Speaker 1: That leaves the. 274 00:12:18,679 --> 00:12:20,880 Speaker 2: Door open for her to communicate if she wants to, 275 00:12:21,120 --> 00:12:23,480 Speaker 2: or to wait if she'd rather have the conversation in person. 276 00:12:23,559 --> 00:12:25,400 Speaker 2: Good luck to the two of you. I am rooting 277 00:12:25,440 --> 00:12:28,600 Speaker 2: for you. Opie responds with update. I basically sent a 278 00:12:28,640 --> 00:12:30,960 Speaker 2: text along the lines of what you suggested, and she 279 00:12:31,080 --> 00:12:34,240 Speaker 2: immediately called me wondering when I was going to finally 280 00:12:34,280 --> 00:12:35,080 Speaker 2: say something. 281 00:12:36,000 --> 00:12:36,360 Speaker 1: Boom. 282 00:12:36,440 --> 00:12:37,120 Speaker 3: That's so exciting. 283 00:12:37,200 --> 00:12:38,880 Speaker 2: We had a really good talk over the phone and 284 00:12:38,920 --> 00:12:40,720 Speaker 2: we're both basically on the same. 285 00:12:40,520 --> 00:12:43,200 Speaker 1: Page that we want to give us a shot. Thank you. 286 00:12:45,120 --> 00:12:45,640 Speaker 3: There we go. 287 00:12:46,120 --> 00:12:47,040 Speaker 1: Is that a donu? 288 00:12:47,160 --> 00:12:47,680 Speaker 3: I see? 289 00:12:47,800 --> 00:12:49,439 Speaker 4: Yeah, we missed a donut from yesterday? 290 00:12:49,480 --> 00:12:52,400 Speaker 2: Oh my god, Christian Chica is so sorry about that 291 00:12:52,440 --> 00:12:53,280 Speaker 2: ten dollars tip. 292 00:12:53,400 --> 00:12:53,920 Speaker 1: Thanks for that. 293 00:12:54,360 --> 00:12:57,000 Speaker 2: Just was watching the Members only from yesterday and wanted 294 00:12:57,040 --> 00:12:58,240 Speaker 2: to quickly shout out mo. 295 00:12:58,880 --> 00:12:59,960 Speaker 1: Yeah. 296 00:13:00,040 --> 00:13:05,240 Speaker 2: Also also love seeing Riley in sense mode. Yeah, killing 297 00:13:05,360 --> 00:13:08,720 Speaker 2: big shout out to Mo aka addie he has He's 298 00:13:08,720 --> 00:13:11,880 Speaker 2: a man that goes by many names, but a wonderful 299 00:13:11,960 --> 00:13:14,240 Speaker 2: person nonetheless, So thank you for the shout out. Very 300 00:13:14,280 --> 00:13:16,840 Speaker 2: much appreciated. We have an update three days later. However, 301 00:13:16,920 --> 00:13:17,840 Speaker 2: what's your predictions? 302 00:13:18,360 --> 00:13:21,200 Speaker 3: My predictions, they're gonna get together. I think they're gonna 303 00:13:21,240 --> 00:13:24,760 Speaker 3: get together, they're gonna fall in love, they're gonna keep 304 00:13:24,840 --> 00:13:27,400 Speaker 3: living together, and they're gonna adopt two cats. 305 00:13:27,720 --> 00:13:31,360 Speaker 2: Well, what I think in my conspiracy theory is that 306 00:13:31,400 --> 00:13:35,040 Speaker 2: because it's three days later, something happens, and Opie's nervous 307 00:13:35,080 --> 00:13:36,800 Speaker 2: because it's like I feel like if it was like, oh, 308 00:13:36,880 --> 00:13:39,280 Speaker 2: everything's great, the update would have been two weeks later 309 00:13:39,360 --> 00:13:41,520 Speaker 2: when she gets back and it's like, oh my gosh. 310 00:13:41,520 --> 00:13:43,679 Speaker 3: So maybe they call, maybe they had a little talk 311 00:13:43,720 --> 00:13:44,120 Speaker 3: on the. 312 00:13:44,160 --> 00:13:48,400 Speaker 2: Phone, but like three days later, though, like, what is 313 00:13:48,559 --> 00:13:51,560 Speaker 2: what is there to update other than a break up? 314 00:13:51,679 --> 00:13:54,320 Speaker 3: So she calls up. She says, I knew you were 315 00:13:54,360 --> 00:13:57,160 Speaker 3: thinking about it. I was thinking about it too. I'm 316 00:13:57,240 --> 00:14:00,320 Speaker 3: leaving my trip early. I'm coming home just to see you. 317 00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:02,480 Speaker 3: I miss you. And then they get together and they 318 00:14:02,480 --> 00:14:03,360 Speaker 3: get two cuts. 319 00:14:03,360 --> 00:14:06,160 Speaker 1: Pretty good. My theory is is divorce no. 320 00:14:09,360 --> 00:14:10,320 Speaker 3: Should get there. 321 00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:12,360 Speaker 1: Well, let's find out. 322 00:14:13,120 --> 00:14:16,600 Speaker 2: So update three days later, after getting some good advice 323 00:14:16,640 --> 00:14:18,520 Speaker 2: on here, I just decided to go for it and 324 00:14:18,559 --> 00:14:20,920 Speaker 2: message her directly about what happened and asked if she 325 00:14:20,960 --> 00:14:23,080 Speaker 2: wanted to talk about it. She immediately called me on 326 00:14:23,160 --> 00:14:25,400 Speaker 2: video chat, wondering when I was going to finally say something. 327 00:14:25,520 --> 00:14:27,760 Speaker 2: We had a really good conversation about everything and kind 328 00:14:27,760 --> 00:14:30,440 Speaker 2: of started diving into some personal feelings for each other 329 00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:33,480 Speaker 2: that we either suppressed or ignored. Either way, we both 330 00:14:33,560 --> 00:14:35,560 Speaker 2: came to the same conclusion that we want to give 331 00:14:35,600 --> 00:14:38,120 Speaker 2: us a try and see where it goes. I contemplated 332 00:14:38,160 --> 00:14:40,920 Speaker 2: that this was possibly just a knee jerk reaction to 333 00:14:40,960 --> 00:14:44,320 Speaker 2: the feelings of lust or confusion after an intimate interaction, 334 00:14:44,680 --> 00:14:49,400 Speaker 2: but love love, But after doing some soul searching the 335 00:14:49,440 --> 00:14:52,520 Speaker 2: past couple of days, I realized that it's more than that, 336 00:14:52,560 --> 00:14:54,800 Speaker 2: and if you want something more than that with us, then. 337 00:14:54,800 --> 00:14:56,040 Speaker 1: Joined our lives. 338 00:14:56,680 --> 00:14:59,080 Speaker 2: Every weekday at three pm PST. You can just tap 339 00:14:59,080 --> 00:15:02,440 Speaker 2: her profile get intimate with us. We want to let's 340 00:15:02,440 --> 00:15:03,480 Speaker 2: get down and dirty. 341 00:15:03,680 --> 00:15:05,200 Speaker 4: Yep, and you don't even have to wrap it just 342 00:15:05,240 --> 00:15:05,600 Speaker 4: to happen. 343 00:15:06,640 --> 00:15:08,760 Speaker 1: That's true. She's everything I've been looking for. 344 00:15:09,320 --> 00:15:11,560 Speaker 2: The time we spent together is always full of fun, 345 00:15:11,600 --> 00:15:14,560 Speaker 2: experiences and laughter. She understands me and we can talk 346 00:15:14,560 --> 00:15:17,720 Speaker 2: about anything. I'm comfortable around her and feel like She's 347 00:15:17,800 --> 00:15:19,480 Speaker 2: just my safe space when I need to let it 348 00:15:19,480 --> 00:15:21,680 Speaker 2: all out. You know, she's my best friend, and while 349 00:15:21,680 --> 00:15:23,800 Speaker 2: I don't expect that to be the reason this works, 350 00:15:23,960 --> 00:15:25,680 Speaker 2: I think it's going to be good for me to 351 00:15:25,760 --> 00:15:28,640 Speaker 2: finally be romantically involved with someone I know makes me 352 00:15:28,720 --> 00:15:31,200 Speaker 2: happy already at the end of the day, that's all 353 00:15:31,240 --> 00:15:33,520 Speaker 2: I care about. Thanks again for those who offered support 354 00:15:33,520 --> 00:15:36,040 Speaker 2: on my first post. I'm excited to see where this 355 00:15:36,120 --> 00:15:36,920 Speaker 2: journey takes me. 356 00:15:37,280 --> 00:15:44,520 Speaker 1: Update. I got divorced. Just just kidding, lie yay, happily 357 00:15:44,560 --> 00:15:45,120 Speaker 1: ever after. 358 00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:48,440 Speaker 4: I love that we started this off nice. 359 00:15:48,920 --> 00:15:52,160 Speaker 2: Right, speaking of starting it off nice and then at 360 00:15:52,200 --> 00:15:54,680 Speaker 2: not ending nice, let's do a quick okay story time 361 00:15:54,760 --> 00:15:58,720 Speaker 2: for Sofia. Sophia, where were we last night? 362 00:15:58,760 --> 00:16:05,080 Speaker 3: And we were tell us it YouTuber events so fancy, Yeah, 363 00:16:05,120 --> 00:16:07,920 Speaker 3: a little haunted house house. 364 00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:10,680 Speaker 1: Yet we might be featured in some video. 365 00:16:10,480 --> 00:16:15,560 Speaker 2: Maybe yeah yeah probably almost certainly not. 366 00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:18,760 Speaker 3: But we were waiting there for a while to get 367 00:16:18,760 --> 00:16:22,880 Speaker 3: into the haunted house and uh so, Sam John, my boyfriend, 368 00:16:22,960 --> 00:16:26,520 Speaker 3: and I were playing some Little Ninja and they were 369 00:16:26,600 --> 00:16:29,080 Speaker 3: so much more intense literally. 370 00:16:28,960 --> 00:16:30,840 Speaker 2: To be honest, I was next to Sophia and I 371 00:16:31,360 --> 00:16:33,920 Speaker 2: get I dialed it back because I'm like, I'm gonna 372 00:16:34,080 --> 00:16:35,720 Speaker 2: hit her hand and it's going to be too much. 373 00:16:35,800 --> 00:16:37,880 Speaker 3: It's gonna be too much. And Sam, who's not even 374 00:16:37,880 --> 00:16:39,720 Speaker 3: next to me, you shouldn't even be attacking. 375 00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:40,360 Speaker 1: That's true. 376 00:16:40,480 --> 00:16:44,440 Speaker 3: Actually he literally like he releases all one hundred percent 377 00:16:44,480 --> 00:16:47,920 Speaker 3: of his power into this whack and like wax my 378 00:16:48,160 --> 00:16:51,840 Speaker 3: hand so hard that my finger is still I think 379 00:16:51,880 --> 00:16:54,280 Speaker 3: it's like really bruised. You can kind of you can 380 00:16:54,360 --> 00:16:55,440 Speaker 3: kind of see the difference. 381 00:16:55,760 --> 00:16:57,920 Speaker 2: Wait, wait, no, we need side by side, side by side. Wait, 382 00:16:58,000 --> 00:16:59,280 Speaker 2: so this is yes, there you go. 383 00:16:59,400 --> 00:17:02,600 Speaker 3: See you can see how much fatter this part of 384 00:17:02,800 --> 00:17:03,560 Speaker 3: the finger is. 385 00:17:04,280 --> 00:17:05,520 Speaker 1: What are you doing with your pinky? 386 00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:05,800 Speaker 3: What? 387 00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:06,919 Speaker 1: There you go? 388 00:17:07,560 --> 00:17:11,040 Speaker 3: I can't. 389 00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:12,680 Speaker 1: Sophia is very injured. 390 00:17:13,560 --> 00:17:15,320 Speaker 3: The point is I injured my finger. 391 00:17:15,680 --> 00:17:16,560 Speaker 1: She's debilitated. 392 00:17:16,840 --> 00:17:25,720 Speaker 2: Yeah, send some healing energy for Sophia. 393 00:17:26,960 --> 00:17:28,399 Speaker 3: And so that's our story about last night. 394 00:17:28,600 --> 00:17:30,399 Speaker 1: That's the story so many new friends. 395 00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:30,920 Speaker 3: It's true. 396 00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:32,000 Speaker 1: Riley crushed it. 397 00:17:32,280 --> 00:17:35,120 Speaker 4: He was going to then I did not. 398 00:17:35,440 --> 00:17:38,560 Speaker 2: I refused to go the whole funny bit, which maybe 399 00:17:38,800 --> 00:17:41,040 Speaker 2: we'll explain later if that video with us ever and 400 00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:41,919 Speaker 2: it ever comes out the. 401 00:17:42,359 --> 00:17:46,000 Speaker 1: Record us they like we didn't have. 402 00:17:44,320 --> 00:17:47,240 Speaker 3: The body camera. Well no, but there was a guy. 403 00:17:47,760 --> 00:17:50,080 Speaker 1: One guy in one room that I saw recording. One 404 00:17:50,080 --> 00:17:53,680 Speaker 1: guy in one room. There's no there's there's audio. Maybe 405 00:17:53,720 --> 00:17:55,359 Speaker 1: they had the other shots, but like, I don't know, 406 00:17:55,440 --> 00:17:56,560 Speaker 1: I don't possibly not us. 407 00:17:56,840 --> 00:17:57,560 Speaker 4: I don't like us. 408 00:17:57,680 --> 00:17:59,800 Speaker 3: That's why we were I think we were dead last. 409 00:18:00,280 --> 00:18:01,520 Speaker 4: No, no, my friend was. 410 00:18:01,600 --> 00:18:04,080 Speaker 3: We were second to last. True, But let's get into it. 411 00:18:04,520 --> 00:18:07,399 Speaker 3: Go it. I want to tell my friend with benefits 412 00:18:07,480 --> 00:18:10,040 Speaker 3: I'm in love with her, but she's already said we 413 00:18:10,080 --> 00:18:14,040 Speaker 3: can never date. There you go, that's sober over before began. 414 00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:17,120 Speaker 3: I male twenty five, met a girl, female twenty three 415 00:18:17,359 --> 00:18:19,960 Speaker 3: through a dating app nine months ago. She lives in 416 00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:22,160 Speaker 3: a different state to me, but visits my state every 417 00:18:22,200 --> 00:18:24,560 Speaker 3: once in a while to see family. For the sake 418 00:18:24,640 --> 00:18:27,439 Speaker 3: of this post, we will call her Winnie. So Winnie 419 00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:29,560 Speaker 3: and I start to get along pretty well, but I 420 00:18:29,680 --> 00:18:34,760 Speaker 3: quickly discovered that she is neuro divergent asd ADHD severe OCD. 421 00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:37,399 Speaker 3: The reason I mentioned this is because she interacts with 422 00:18:37,440 --> 00:18:39,960 Speaker 3: me in ways that I am very much not used to. 423 00:18:40,240 --> 00:18:42,679 Speaker 3: Sometimes I have to be very direct with her in 424 00:18:42,800 --> 00:18:45,560 Speaker 3: order for her to understand what I'm saying. Other times, 425 00:18:45,640 --> 00:18:50,399 Speaker 3: she understands very easily. Winnie is very flirtatious, but often 426 00:18:50,440 --> 00:18:53,880 Speaker 3: doesn't realize just how flirtatious she's being. Whinnie is also 427 00:18:53,960 --> 00:18:57,520 Speaker 3: dropped dead gorgeous and doesn't realize just how beautiful she is. 428 00:18:58,480 --> 00:19:00,520 Speaker 3: That's a just a biaber song right there. No, we 429 00:19:00,600 --> 00:19:07,800 Speaker 3: know that's a one direction. That's one direction, and doesn't 430 00:19:07,880 --> 00:19:10,440 Speaker 3: realize just how beautiful she is. She's had a bad 431 00:19:10,560 --> 00:19:13,119 Speaker 3: history with men and has past traumas that have shaped 432 00:19:13,119 --> 00:19:15,920 Speaker 3: her responses to certain things. By the way, this comes 433 00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:19,040 Speaker 3: from Australian Alien six on the r slash Okay storytime, 434 00:19:19,080 --> 00:19:21,840 Speaker 3: sup read it. So we became good friends, and at 435 00:19:21,880 --> 00:19:24,879 Speaker 3: the time of our meeting, I wasn't really looking for relationship, 436 00:19:24,960 --> 00:19:27,880 Speaker 3: and neither was sheep We were happy to just be friends. 437 00:19:28,119 --> 00:19:30,520 Speaker 3: Then she visited my state for the first time a 438 00:19:30,560 --> 00:19:33,240 Speaker 3: month or two after we first started talking. I got 439 00:19:33,240 --> 00:19:38,240 Speaker 3: a hotel and we ended up having spicy sleep, spending 440 00:19:38,320 --> 00:19:43,760 Speaker 3: the night together. Just just it happened. Happens, It just happened, 441 00:19:45,200 --> 00:19:51,480 Speaker 3: of it just happened. I mean though it went reasonably well, 442 00:19:51,640 --> 00:19:54,000 Speaker 3: but I hadn't really fallen madly in love with her 443 00:19:54,000 --> 00:19:57,040 Speaker 3: at this point. That comes later. We keep talking for 444 00:19:57,160 --> 00:20:00,240 Speaker 3: months and months after we hook up, Winnie see these 445 00:20:00,400 --> 00:20:03,360 Speaker 3: many other men. She tells me all about her spicy 446 00:20:03,400 --> 00:20:06,919 Speaker 3: sleep encounters. At first, I enjoy hearing about the kooky 447 00:20:07,119 --> 00:20:09,560 Speaker 3: character she meets on all these dating apps. But the 448 00:20:09,560 --> 00:20:13,000 Speaker 3: more we talk, the more I begin to feel jealous 449 00:20:13,119 --> 00:20:16,560 Speaker 3: and protective. Some of her encounters did not sound safe 450 00:20:16,560 --> 00:20:20,439 Speaker 3: at all, and that was very worrying. Now, at this 451 00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:24,240 Speaker 3: point in a relationship, things start to get more relationship 452 00:20:24,320 --> 00:20:28,000 Speaker 3: be We start calling each other baby and bay. WHOA, 453 00:20:28,480 --> 00:20:33,480 Speaker 3: that's pretty a relationships fast. I don't think you can 454 00:20:33,520 --> 00:20:36,359 Speaker 3: call like a. Can you call of friends with benefits? 455 00:20:36,440 --> 00:20:37,480 Speaker 3: Baby and baby? 456 00:20:37,480 --> 00:20:38,640 Speaker 1: It's too confusing. 457 00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:40,200 Speaker 3: That would be pretty confused. 458 00:20:40,320 --> 00:20:43,480 Speaker 1: Like I call Riley baby, but you know. 459 00:20:43,800 --> 00:20:47,439 Speaker 3: It does Riley because you're in a committed relationship. I 460 00:20:47,520 --> 00:20:55,880 Speaker 3: call her princess all Oh my god, Princess h We 461 00:20:55,920 --> 00:20:58,720 Speaker 3: do everything together that we can. We call each other 462 00:20:58,800 --> 00:21:02,359 Speaker 3: multiple times a day. We FaceTime every single night. She 463 00:21:02,520 --> 00:21:04,679 Speaker 3: often calls me because she wants to fall asleep to 464 00:21:04,720 --> 00:21:07,600 Speaker 3: the sound of my voice. You guys are in a relationship. 465 00:21:07,680 --> 00:21:08,280 Speaker 1: What are we doing? 466 00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:13,640 Speaker 3: Come on? She off totally normal friend behavior. Right then, 467 00:21:14,000 --> 00:21:20,280 Speaker 3: Whinnie hits me with the album what Just Lesbians? 468 00:21:20,720 --> 00:21:23,040 Speaker 4: Pilgrim versus the world reference if you've ever seen it, 469 00:21:23,119 --> 00:21:23,880 Speaker 4: I haven't seen it. 470 00:21:24,040 --> 00:21:28,160 Speaker 3: What we already established this on movie. She starts telling 471 00:21:28,200 --> 00:21:30,639 Speaker 3: me that she loves me. I tell her that I 472 00:21:30,680 --> 00:21:33,600 Speaker 3: love her too. We say it almost every day. Oh 473 00:21:33,640 --> 00:21:36,640 Speaker 3: my god. I do everything for her. I buy her gifts, 474 00:21:36,800 --> 00:21:40,199 Speaker 3: help her study, console her when she's sad, send her 475 00:21:40,240 --> 00:21:43,480 Speaker 3: reminders to take her medication, what she forgets. I choose 476 00:21:43,480 --> 00:21:45,640 Speaker 3: to do these things because I care about her a lot. 477 00:21:45,840 --> 00:21:46,720 Speaker 1: This is a relationship. 478 00:21:46,800 --> 00:21:47,680 Speaker 3: That's a relationship. 479 00:21:48,280 --> 00:21:51,360 Speaker 1: What are we doing? You're reminding her about her medications? 480 00:21:51,359 --> 00:21:52,600 Speaker 4: Oh my god, how have you. 481 00:21:52,600 --> 00:21:54,080 Speaker 3: Not had a conversation about this? 482 00:21:54,240 --> 00:21:57,159 Speaker 1: Dude? This is too much? Sorry, come on? 483 00:21:58,119 --> 00:22:03,680 Speaker 3: What Understandably, I became very attached and it becomes more 484 00:22:03,720 --> 00:22:05,800 Speaker 3: and more difficult for me to hear about these other 485 00:22:05,920 --> 00:22:10,879 Speaker 3: men she's efing. Why, like, just have a conversation with her. 486 00:22:11,080 --> 00:22:14,600 Speaker 3: Say you want to be exclusive, use your words. You're 487 00:22:14,600 --> 00:22:15,200 Speaker 3: a big boy. 488 00:22:15,720 --> 00:22:17,280 Speaker 1: Sit there, torture yourself. 489 00:22:17,400 --> 00:22:19,639 Speaker 3: During our relationship, I also had a girl that I 490 00:22:19,680 --> 00:22:22,560 Speaker 3: met up with and had spicy sleep with a few times, 491 00:22:22,600 --> 00:22:24,679 Speaker 3: but I called it off because I grew feelings for 492 00:22:24,720 --> 00:22:28,080 Speaker 3: Winny and I lost all desire to have spicy sleep 493 00:22:28,119 --> 00:22:31,399 Speaker 3: with anyone else. All this jealousy that I'm feeling comes 494 00:22:31,400 --> 00:22:33,960 Speaker 3: to a head when she starts talking to someone who 495 00:22:34,040 --> 00:22:39,440 Speaker 3: she is potentially actually interested in dating. She fawns over him, 496 00:22:39,600 --> 00:22:44,440 Speaker 3: sends me screenshots of messages he sends, tells me all 497 00:22:44,480 --> 00:22:47,480 Speaker 3: the sweet things he's done. But I get confused. I 498 00:22:47,680 --> 00:22:50,960 Speaker 3: didn't set all these things first. Why doesn't she feel 499 00:22:51,000 --> 00:22:53,800 Speaker 3: this way for me? There is such a high chance 500 00:22:53,880 --> 00:22:57,240 Speaker 3: that she does. But you've never actually brought up wanting 501 00:22:57,280 --> 00:22:59,600 Speaker 3: to be in an official relationship with her, and she's 502 00:22:59,640 --> 00:23:01,600 Speaker 3: just like, he's not interested in me that way. You 503 00:23:01,680 --> 00:23:03,720 Speaker 3: both aren't communicating, and that's an issue. 504 00:23:03,760 --> 00:23:06,400 Speaker 2: Has she said yet, I don't want to be Okay, 505 00:23:06,560 --> 00:23:07,600 Speaker 2: not yet, that's come up. 506 00:23:07,600 --> 00:23:13,760 Speaker 3: Okay, Yeah, long story short. That guy after on the 507 00:23:13,800 --> 00:23:17,040 Speaker 3: first night they met and then never texted her again, 508 00:23:17,240 --> 00:23:20,800 Speaker 3: out a running pattern for Winnie. Men just kind of 509 00:23:20,840 --> 00:23:24,520 Speaker 3: suck sometimes, I guess. So again she falls back to me. 510 00:23:24,760 --> 00:23:27,479 Speaker 3: I remain the constant while she cycles through a roster 511 00:23:27,600 --> 00:23:30,639 Speaker 3: of male characters. We communicate a lot. I tell her 512 00:23:30,680 --> 00:23:33,160 Speaker 3: about my jealousy. Okay, so Opie's. 513 00:23:33,040 --> 00:23:35,840 Speaker 1: There's some communication happening on. Okay, that's good. 514 00:23:36,040 --> 00:23:40,600 Speaker 3: She reiterates that we are just friends. Okay, so they're there. 515 00:23:40,680 --> 00:23:43,880 Speaker 3: It is in that case, stop doing that to yourself. 516 00:23:43,960 --> 00:23:47,680 Speaker 3: You're just turting yourself like op, yeah, OPI yeah. If 517 00:23:47,680 --> 00:23:49,760 Speaker 3: she's if she doesn't want to give you a relationship, 518 00:23:49,800 --> 00:23:52,200 Speaker 3: that's her own, right. But you're in love with her 519 00:23:52,320 --> 00:23:55,360 Speaker 3: and she's using you as kind of emotional support while 520 00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:57,960 Speaker 3: she sees these other men and you're actively being jealous 521 00:23:58,000 --> 00:23:58,439 Speaker 3: and stuff. 522 00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:02,119 Speaker 2: Yeah it hurts you too, Like, yeah, no reason to 523 00:24:02,240 --> 00:24:05,760 Speaker 2: But it sounds like he's in the love cycle where. 524 00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:07,600 Speaker 1: It's like, well, but but I do love. 525 00:24:07,400 --> 00:24:10,360 Speaker 3: Her, but also is in the situationship of maybe she'll 526 00:24:10,400 --> 00:24:10,960 Speaker 3: change her mind. 527 00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:13,600 Speaker 2: Yes, And also I think the thing here that like 528 00:24:13,800 --> 00:24:15,320 Speaker 2: really needs to be clarified by her. 529 00:24:15,400 --> 00:24:16,320 Speaker 1: She said I. 530 00:24:16,280 --> 00:24:19,159 Speaker 2: Love you and I don't want a relationship, so like 531 00:24:19,560 --> 00:24:22,280 Speaker 2: what does that mean? Yeah, like what does that mean? 532 00:24:22,359 --> 00:24:23,919 Speaker 1: Yeah? What does that mean to her? And like for 533 00:24:23,960 --> 00:24:24,960 Speaker 1: her to really break. 534 00:24:24,720 --> 00:24:29,960 Speaker 2: That down because she said to seemingly very contradictory things. 535 00:24:30,280 --> 00:24:31,919 Speaker 2: So it's like, typically it's like, oh, I love you, 536 00:24:31,960 --> 00:24:34,480 Speaker 2: I want to be in a committed relationship with you, 537 00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:37,360 Speaker 2: or like whatever their version of a committed relationship is, right, 538 00:24:37,480 --> 00:24:40,360 Speaker 2: So it's like, is she saying like like, I love 539 00:24:40,400 --> 00:24:41,000 Speaker 2: you like a friend. 540 00:24:41,040 --> 00:24:43,440 Speaker 1: I don't know there's there's She's. 541 00:24:43,280 --> 00:24:45,919 Speaker 3: Like, I love you like a friend like a friend. 542 00:24:46,080 --> 00:24:46,280 Speaker 1: Yeah. 543 00:24:46,320 --> 00:24:49,880 Speaker 2: No, she needs to communicate ye way more right now, 544 00:24:49,880 --> 00:24:51,720 Speaker 2: And I think OPI needs to ask her for that 545 00:24:51,880 --> 00:24:53,440 Speaker 2: extra communication as. 546 00:24:53,160 --> 00:24:56,280 Speaker 3: Now, yeah, or maybe cut her off or like limit 547 00:24:56,359 --> 00:25:00,600 Speaker 3: contact contact if this continues. See she re that we 548 00:25:00,640 --> 00:25:03,439 Speaker 3: are just friends, but she cares more deeply about me 549 00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:05,760 Speaker 3: than any of the men she's ever been with. This 550 00:25:05,800 --> 00:25:06,640 Speaker 3: puts me at ease. 551 00:25:06,800 --> 00:25:11,440 Speaker 1: That best, that's what that should do. The opposite, because it's. 552 00:25:11,280 --> 00:25:13,240 Speaker 3: Like I'd be like, I'm incredibly confused. 553 00:25:13,320 --> 00:25:16,679 Speaker 2: Dun's Browl twenty ten says she's manipulating Opie. Is it 554 00:25:16,760 --> 00:25:19,600 Speaker 2: a case of like my love life is hectic? She 555 00:25:19,600 --> 00:25:21,640 Speaker 2: she's like all over the place, and she's like. 556 00:25:21,920 --> 00:25:23,560 Speaker 3: She wants she wants constant. 557 00:25:23,600 --> 00:25:24,879 Speaker 1: I want to keep you here. 558 00:25:24,920 --> 00:25:28,240 Speaker 2: I'm not ready to commit to you, but I want 559 00:25:28,240 --> 00:25:31,680 Speaker 2: to give you enough to like stay as my support 560 00:25:32,200 --> 00:25:33,119 Speaker 2: system or whatever. 561 00:25:33,240 --> 00:25:39,320 Speaker 3: Possibly I'm more important than them. I think I'm the 562 00:25:39,359 --> 00:25:41,960 Speaker 3: one who will last. She tells her friends about me, 563 00:25:42,000 --> 00:25:44,720 Speaker 3: and they all say I sound very sweet. They're confused 564 00:25:44,880 --> 00:25:46,879 Speaker 3: as to why she doesn't want to date me. I 565 00:25:47,080 --> 00:25:50,600 Speaker 3: just don't, she tells them. Winnie is often conflicted about me. 566 00:25:50,800 --> 00:25:53,760 Speaker 3: She thinks the lines have become too blurry. She often 567 00:25:53,800 --> 00:25:57,600 Speaker 3: tells me our friendship has an expiration date? What these are? 568 00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:00,760 Speaker 3: There's so many red flags? Dude, how many red flacks? 569 00:26:00,920 --> 00:26:03,760 Speaker 3: This upsets me? I wonder why. She also tells me 570 00:26:03,800 --> 00:26:06,399 Speaker 3: all the reasons why we would never date. This upsets me. 571 00:26:06,720 --> 00:26:08,480 Speaker 3: It gets to a point where when he tells me 572 00:26:08,560 --> 00:26:10,639 Speaker 3: that we can't be friends anymore because she thinks that 573 00:26:10,760 --> 00:26:13,640 Speaker 3: my feelings for her are too strong. At this point 574 00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:15,760 Speaker 3: in our relationship, we are planning to meet up in 575 00:26:15,800 --> 00:26:18,800 Speaker 3: person again in two weeks. We both have gifts for 576 00:26:18,880 --> 00:26:21,560 Speaker 3: each other, and solid plans are in place. 577 00:26:21,680 --> 00:26:22,359 Speaker 1: No, no, no, no, no. 578 00:26:22,960 --> 00:26:27,439 Speaker 2: Your solid plans are are our plans for You're planning 579 00:26:27,440 --> 00:26:28,040 Speaker 2: for disaster. 580 00:26:28,119 --> 00:26:30,240 Speaker 3: You're planning for disasked because you. 581 00:26:30,359 --> 00:26:32,359 Speaker 2: Keep getting in deeper and deeper, and it's going to 582 00:26:32,480 --> 00:26:34,560 Speaker 2: hurt more and more and more the deeper you go. 583 00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:38,800 Speaker 3: You're digging this hole and she's filling it with seawater. 584 00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:42,080 Speaker 2: Frogs can't survive in that, No, they can. There's literally no, 585 00:26:42,280 --> 00:26:42,919 Speaker 2: there's literally no. 586 00:26:42,920 --> 00:26:46,160 Speaker 3: There's only one frog and it doesn't last long in seawater, it. 587 00:26:46,119 --> 00:26:48,320 Speaker 1: Doesn't do well, and you're that frog. You're that frog, 588 00:26:48,440 --> 00:26:51,480 Speaker 1: and she's seawater and she's the salty water. 589 00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:54,199 Speaker 3: And that is a metaphor for like sorry, bro. So 590 00:26:54,400 --> 00:26:56,879 Speaker 3: I bite the bullet and confess to her over the 591 00:26:56,880 --> 00:26:59,880 Speaker 3: phone that I don't just love her, I'm in love 592 00:27:00,119 --> 00:27:00,400 Speaker 3: with her. 593 00:27:00,680 --> 00:27:03,879 Speaker 1: Oh okay, at least we're getting communication, all right. 594 00:27:04,000 --> 00:27:06,399 Speaker 3: She's the first thing I think about every morning. I 595 00:27:06,480 --> 00:27:09,040 Speaker 3: look forward to speaking with her every day. I am 596 00:27:09,160 --> 00:27:11,120 Speaker 3: in love with her, and I want to be with her. 597 00:27:11,320 --> 00:27:11,720 Speaker 1: Oh. 598 00:27:11,760 --> 00:27:14,399 Speaker 3: I pour my heart out and cry out all my 599 00:27:14,440 --> 00:27:17,840 Speaker 3: feelings to her. Whinnie is very sweet and understanding, but 600 00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:21,320 Speaker 3: says she doesn't reciprocate my feelings. We have a good discussion. 601 00:27:21,560 --> 00:27:24,160 Speaker 3: We agree to still meet up when she visits, give 602 00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:27,200 Speaker 3: each other our gifts, and then go our separate ways. 603 00:27:27,480 --> 00:27:33,159 Speaker 3: But wait, there's more. Oh ay yay yai. Leading up 604 00:27:33,200 --> 00:27:36,560 Speaker 3: to her visit, we keep talking constantly. She tells me 605 00:27:36,600 --> 00:27:39,679 Speaker 3: how much she misses me, still treats me like a boyfriend. 606 00:27:39,760 --> 00:27:41,800 Speaker 3: We start planning to do more than just give each 607 00:27:41,800 --> 00:27:47,639 Speaker 3: other gifts. Stop, you're hurting yourself. Eventually, when she visits, 608 00:27:47,640 --> 00:27:50,679 Speaker 3: we see each other four times at one point We 609 00:27:50,720 --> 00:27:54,200 Speaker 3: spent three whole days together. It was amazing. We both 610 00:27:54,240 --> 00:27:57,480 Speaker 3: had a great time. We had spicy sleep every day 611 00:27:57,520 --> 00:28:00,000 Speaker 3: we met up. We went to the movies a couple times, 612 00:28:00,320 --> 00:28:02,320 Speaker 3: did a lot of shopping. I bought her a lot 613 00:28:02,320 --> 00:28:04,359 Speaker 3: of gifts because I'm a sucker and I like to 614 00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:06,720 Speaker 3: spoil the people I care about. We got lots of 615 00:28:06,720 --> 00:28:08,800 Speaker 3: great food. It was a lot of fun. But this 616 00:28:08,960 --> 00:28:12,720 Speaker 3: whole time, she's holding my hand everywhere we go, clinging 617 00:28:12,760 --> 00:28:16,240 Speaker 3: to my arm, kissing me constantly. Oh yeah, yea. She 618 00:28:16,359 --> 00:28:18,440 Speaker 3: tells me, how am I ever supposed to meet someone 619 00:28:18,440 --> 00:28:21,960 Speaker 3: who treats me like you do? You have? This girl 620 00:28:22,080 --> 00:28:26,080 Speaker 3: is so manipulative, she's so manipulative. Oh my god, Ay, 621 00:28:27,160 --> 00:28:29,880 Speaker 3: stop putting yourself through this open. 622 00:28:30,200 --> 00:28:32,520 Speaker 1: How am I supposed to meet someone like you? 623 00:28:32,920 --> 00:28:37,440 Speaker 5: That's crazy when you're already all the relationship things. 624 00:28:37,280 --> 00:28:39,560 Speaker 3: You're literally and it's not even like I feel like 625 00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:44,280 Speaker 3: sometimes you know, people are have like friendship, purely platonic friendships. Yeah, 626 00:28:44,320 --> 00:28:47,520 Speaker 3: like I wish you know I was attracted to you, yeah, 627 00:28:47,560 --> 00:28:49,880 Speaker 3: because it would be a great partner. But no, she 628 00:28:50,160 --> 00:28:51,920 Speaker 3: is seemingly attracted to him. 629 00:28:52,080 --> 00:28:53,400 Speaker 1: Yes, that's the thing here. 630 00:28:53,440 --> 00:28:53,800 Speaker 3: She is. 631 00:28:55,640 --> 00:28:57,960 Speaker 1: All the relationship. 632 00:28:57,400 --> 00:29:00,000 Speaker 3: Things, just without the label. 633 00:28:59,720 --> 00:29:03,720 Speaker 1: And the twist of the knife of that sentence. It's 634 00:29:03,960 --> 00:29:06,360 Speaker 1: so cruel. It really is so cool. 635 00:29:06,560 --> 00:29:10,920 Speaker 3: So he's like, I'm here, just leave her. I respond 636 00:29:11,080 --> 00:29:13,400 Speaker 3: and tell her she already has met someone that treats 637 00:29:13,400 --> 00:29:16,000 Speaker 3: her like I do. Winnie then goes home, and I'm 638 00:29:16,040 --> 00:29:18,640 Speaker 3: devastated because I want her to stay forever. But we 639 00:29:18,720 --> 00:29:22,000 Speaker 3: still continue to talk every day, more like a couple 640 00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:24,280 Speaker 3: than ever. At this point, she has deleted all her 641 00:29:24,360 --> 00:29:26,880 Speaker 3: dating apps. She tells me she has no desire to 642 00:29:26,920 --> 00:29:29,200 Speaker 3: hook up with anyone or meet up with any man, 643 00:29:29,560 --> 00:29:31,520 Speaker 3: but she still wants to meet up with me. 644 00:29:31,760 --> 00:29:32,520 Speaker 1: Okay. 645 00:29:32,600 --> 00:29:35,360 Speaker 3: This continues for a while. Altogether, she was off the 646 00:29:35,440 --> 00:29:37,640 Speaker 3: dating apps for two to three months, so it got 647 00:29:37,720 --> 00:29:39,760 Speaker 3: to a point where it felt like she only really 648 00:29:39,800 --> 00:29:43,040 Speaker 3: wanted me. Fast forward to last week. She goes out 649 00:29:43,080 --> 00:29:45,920 Speaker 3: to dinner with two of her girlfriends. Some random guy 650 00:29:46,000 --> 00:29:48,720 Speaker 3: comes up to them and starts talking. Her two friends leave, 651 00:29:48,760 --> 00:29:51,600 Speaker 3: but when he stays, this random guy offers to walk 652 00:29:51,640 --> 00:29:54,880 Speaker 3: Whinnie home. They kiss, and then they have spicy sleep 653 00:29:54,960 --> 00:29:56,160 Speaker 3: and public Oh my god. 654 00:29:56,320 --> 00:29:56,600 Speaker 1: Oh. 655 00:29:57,960 --> 00:30:00,360 Speaker 3: I was sitting there waiting by the phone for her 656 00:30:00,400 --> 00:30:02,960 Speaker 3: to tell me she got home safe. While this happened 657 00:30:03,160 --> 00:30:08,520 Speaker 3: true heartbreak material Elmo. Whennie nonchalantly tells me this over 658 00:30:08,560 --> 00:30:11,480 Speaker 3: the phone that morning, after not expecting me to care, 659 00:30:11,680 --> 00:30:15,120 Speaker 3: of course, I was devastated the fact that you have 660 00:30:15,240 --> 00:30:18,520 Speaker 3: confessed your feelings for her and she still uses you 661 00:30:18,920 --> 00:30:22,200 Speaker 3: as like emotional support when she talks about these you know, 662 00:30:22,320 --> 00:30:25,640 Speaker 3: flings that she's having even though she knows how you feel, 663 00:30:25,880 --> 00:30:29,720 Speaker 3: is incredibly manipulative. Should she didn't understand why I felt 664 00:30:29,720 --> 00:30:32,080 Speaker 3: this way. We're just friends, she says. She told me 665 00:30:32,120 --> 00:30:34,360 Speaker 3: she didn't think of me for a second during the 666 00:30:34,560 --> 00:30:35,480 Speaker 3: entire encounter. 667 00:30:35,760 --> 00:30:36,080 Speaker 1: Ouch. 668 00:30:36,520 --> 00:30:38,720 Speaker 3: Her deleting the apps has nothing to do with me. 669 00:30:38,920 --> 00:30:40,840 Speaker 3: She tells me, she never once thought of dating me 670 00:30:40,960 --> 00:30:45,160 Speaker 3: and she never will. Jesus, it's no now and it's 671 00:30:45,240 --> 00:30:48,040 Speaker 3: no forever. She doesn't feel that way about me. I 672 00:30:48,080 --> 00:30:50,040 Speaker 3: told her I wanted her to be my girlfriend, and 673 00:30:50,080 --> 00:30:52,520 Speaker 3: she was shocked. She said that because of her ASD, 674 00:30:52,760 --> 00:30:55,160 Speaker 3: she didn't understand that me telling her I was in 675 00:30:55,200 --> 00:30:57,680 Speaker 3: love with her meant that I wanted to be together. 676 00:30:57,840 --> 00:31:00,200 Speaker 3: I would have had to plainly say I want want 677 00:31:00,200 --> 00:31:02,560 Speaker 3: you to be my girlfriend for her to understand. I 678 00:31:02,600 --> 00:31:05,520 Speaker 3: try very hard to validate and understand her disorders, but 679 00:31:05,560 --> 00:31:08,240 Speaker 3: she's also a very smart girl. I know she's telling 680 00:31:08,280 --> 00:31:10,320 Speaker 3: the truth to me when she says she doesn't understand, 681 00:31:10,400 --> 00:31:13,360 Speaker 3: but it just seems so confusing from my point of view. 682 00:31:13,440 --> 00:31:15,320 Speaker 3: After I told her I was in love with her, 683 00:31:15,400 --> 00:31:17,920 Speaker 3: she even said this is why we can't be friends. 684 00:31:18,120 --> 00:31:21,520 Speaker 3: Then we continued our relationship anyway. Add to that, Winnie 685 00:31:21,600 --> 00:31:25,040 Speaker 3: is a psychologist, so while she struggles with her disorder, 686 00:31:25,160 --> 00:31:28,360 Speaker 3: she does have a strong understanding of emotions. So that's 687 00:31:28,400 --> 00:31:31,640 Speaker 3: where we are now. We had a long conversation. I 688 00:31:31,800 --> 00:31:34,440 Speaker 3: told her that I want a relationship. She says it'll 689 00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:36,960 Speaker 3: never happen. She doesn't really have an explanation as to 690 00:31:37,000 --> 00:31:39,200 Speaker 3: why she just doesn't feel it with me. She says 691 00:31:39,200 --> 00:31:41,840 Speaker 3: she doesn't feel that way with anyone, but her ultimate 692 00:31:41,880 --> 00:31:44,760 Speaker 3: goal is a long term relationship with kids, et cetera. 693 00:31:44,960 --> 00:31:49,800 Speaker 3: She's not a romantic. My dilemma is this, As of yesterday, 694 00:31:49,840 --> 00:31:52,760 Speaker 3: we had cut all communication for a week. We're both 695 00:31:52,800 --> 00:31:55,480 Speaker 3: going to take time to think, mainly me. Her mind 696 00:31:55,560 --> 00:31:57,840 Speaker 3: is made up about where we want to go from here. 697 00:31:58,000 --> 00:32:00,320 Speaker 3: Winnie tells me I'm an adult and she is not 698 00:32:00,400 --> 00:32:04,000 Speaker 3: responsible for my decision in relation to what we do next. 699 00:32:04,240 --> 00:32:07,200 Speaker 3: She is indifferent and will happily continue to act how 700 00:32:07,240 --> 00:32:09,840 Speaker 3: we always have if I'm okay with that. She sometimes 701 00:32:09,880 --> 00:32:12,600 Speaker 3: says I'm a terrible person in relation to the way 702 00:32:12,640 --> 00:32:15,400 Speaker 3: she treats me. Oh she's saying, I'm Yes she is, 703 00:32:15,600 --> 00:32:18,840 Speaker 3: or apologizes for things she's done, but yet she still 704 00:32:18,960 --> 00:32:20,320 Speaker 3: feels indifferent overall. 705 00:32:22,120 --> 00:32:25,840 Speaker 1: You're a terrible person. You're terrible. 706 00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:28,440 Speaker 3: But you know what would make you not a terrible 707 00:32:28,480 --> 00:32:31,480 Speaker 3: person if you joined us live every week down YouTube 708 00:32:31,520 --> 00:32:35,320 Speaker 3: at three pm PST. Just tab her profile. Whoo. I 709 00:32:35,400 --> 00:32:39,080 Speaker 3: care incredibly deeply for her and love her greatly. I 710 00:32:39,080 --> 00:32:41,360 Speaker 3: want her in my life, and it's hard to envision 711 00:32:41,400 --> 00:32:43,560 Speaker 3: life without her. She does things that make me feel 712 00:32:43,680 --> 00:32:47,800 Speaker 3: unloved and invalidated sometimes, but I feel comfortable enough to 713 00:32:47,840 --> 00:32:50,240 Speaker 3: communicate those things with her. If it gets to a 714 00:32:50,280 --> 00:32:51,360 Speaker 3: point where it hurts. 715 00:32:51,160 --> 00:32:57,040 Speaker 5: Me, Oh, it already dies, dog, you already aret, Come on, 716 00:32:57,320 --> 00:33:01,959 Speaker 5: brou Whenni said that I remain friends with her and 717 00:33:02,000 --> 00:33:04,760 Speaker 5: set boundaries, I feel like this might just be sweeping 718 00:33:04,760 --> 00:33:05,840 Speaker 5: the issue under the rug. 719 00:33:06,120 --> 00:33:09,040 Speaker 3: For added context, I've never been in love with anyone 720 00:33:09,080 --> 00:33:11,800 Speaker 3: like this before, and I've never had a relationship. It 721 00:33:11,880 --> 00:33:14,280 Speaker 3: kind of feels like one. She's gone. I'm not going 722 00:33:14,320 --> 00:33:16,600 Speaker 3: to find anyone for a very long time. I'm as 723 00:33:16,640 --> 00:33:19,040 Speaker 3: introverted as they come, and I've grown to hate the 724 00:33:19,120 --> 00:33:21,200 Speaker 3: dating apps. I don't have the desire to search for 725 00:33:21,200 --> 00:33:23,600 Speaker 3: someone else, but I also have no desire longer have 726 00:33:23,680 --> 00:33:26,360 Speaker 3: the desire to be alone I did before Winnie. And 727 00:33:26,440 --> 00:33:28,400 Speaker 3: that is the end of that story. 728 00:33:28,600 --> 00:33:31,040 Speaker 1: Oh what a migraine inducing story. 729 00:33:31,360 --> 00:33:35,160 Speaker 3: Oh definitely, I think you need to cut contact with 730 00:33:35,200 --> 00:33:35,680 Speaker 3: this person. 731 00:33:35,960 --> 00:33:38,600 Speaker 2: Yeah, because like there was the point of like, oh, 732 00:33:38,640 --> 00:33:41,040 Speaker 2: there was confusion between I love her and I want 733 00:33:41,040 --> 00:33:41,440 Speaker 2: to be with. 734 00:33:41,400 --> 00:33:42,960 Speaker 1: Her, all of that aside. 735 00:33:43,040 --> 00:33:44,959 Speaker 2: Even if you take all of that and put it 736 00:33:45,000 --> 00:33:49,400 Speaker 2: over here, the fact that you are continually hurt and 737 00:33:49,600 --> 00:33:52,480 Speaker 2: there is no sign, it is very clear there's no 738 00:33:52,600 --> 00:33:55,600 Speaker 2: sign of those things that hurt you changing. You should 739 00:33:55,720 --> 00:33:58,600 Speaker 2: leave for your own sake. Yes, right, am I wrong? 740 00:33:58,640 --> 00:34:02,160 Speaker 1: Absolutely? Am I crazy? Iron I am my crazy guy? 741 00:34:02,240 --> 00:34:05,560 Speaker 3: Away? You're not wrong? And also to the time, I mean, 742 00:34:05,600 --> 00:34:08,080 Speaker 3: I think this is a fear as as someone who 743 00:34:08,200 --> 00:34:11,400 Speaker 3: also got into relationship, like first relationship later in life, 744 00:34:11,480 --> 00:34:13,719 Speaker 3: I think there is that fear of so late. 745 00:34:13,960 --> 00:34:15,759 Speaker 1: So honestly, I'm done. 746 00:34:16,120 --> 00:34:19,160 Speaker 4: It almost didn't make it, almost makes it so close, But. 747 00:34:19,080 --> 00:34:21,279 Speaker 3: Like when people have like a lot of most a 748 00:34:21,280 --> 00:34:23,160 Speaker 3: lot of people have high school relationships and stuff, and 749 00:34:23,200 --> 00:34:25,520 Speaker 3: so when you have it, like in your twenties, it 750 00:34:25,640 --> 00:34:28,280 Speaker 3: is that fear of like you latch on to someone 751 00:34:28,360 --> 00:34:31,040 Speaker 3: and you're like, if I leave this person, I'll have 752 00:34:31,280 --> 00:34:33,759 Speaker 3: never have anything. And that's not true. You're like, people 753 00:34:33,800 --> 00:34:35,480 Speaker 3: are going to come into your life and this is 754 00:34:35,520 --> 00:34:38,160 Speaker 3: not the only person. Uh, and someone's going to treat 755 00:34:38,160 --> 00:34:39,879 Speaker 3: you much better than this this girl. 756 00:34:40,160 --> 00:34:42,520 Speaker 2: It's the it's the first relationship thing of like it 757 00:34:42,560 --> 00:34:45,560 Speaker 2: feels like everything but it's like, hey, look the relationships 758 00:34:45,560 --> 00:34:47,600 Speaker 2: and relationship is it's it's it's the. 759 00:34:47,520 --> 00:34:48,719 Speaker 1: First timiness of it. 760 00:34:48,840 --> 00:34:51,799 Speaker 2: Yeah, it inflates it to have these like proportions that 761 00:34:52,040 --> 00:34:52,399 Speaker 2: are the. 762 00:34:52,280 --> 00:34:55,279 Speaker 3: Fact that she's here means that you will have more 763 00:34:55,320 --> 00:34:57,640 Speaker 3: options like you had one already. 764 00:34:57,800 --> 00:35:01,680 Speaker 1: What a great point. Yeah, there's someone for everyone. 765 00:35:01,000 --> 00:35:03,120 Speaker 3: For everyone, there's multiple people for everyone. 766 00:35:03,280 --> 00:35:04,520 Speaker 1: Yeah, she's the a hole. 767 00:35:04,719 --> 00:35:08,239 Speaker 2: It seems like she does understand from everything that I'm 768 00:35:08,280 --> 00:35:11,520 Speaker 2: reading that she is hurting him and he's a hole 769 00:35:11,560 --> 00:35:12,080 Speaker 2: to himself. 770 00:35:12,160 --> 00:35:15,080 Speaker 3: Indeed, stop being the a hole to yourself. That just 771 00:35:15,160 --> 00:35:17,320 Speaker 3: Casana say, it's a step away from being a spinster. 772 00:35:17,760 --> 00:35:21,160 Speaker 3: So true, true, I think that is actually true because 773 00:35:21,200 --> 00:35:22,480 Speaker 3: I think I guess the literal. 774 00:35:22,560 --> 00:35:26,800 Speaker 2: Yeah, what was the classic definition of Spencer, like twenty. 775 00:35:26,239 --> 00:35:27,400 Speaker 3: Three something like that. 776 00:35:27,520 --> 00:35:28,040 Speaker 1: Ready for the. 777 00:35:28,000 --> 00:35:30,520 Speaker 3: Grave, ready from practically. 778 00:35:29,960 --> 00:35:31,560 Speaker 1: Dead, practically dead. 779 00:35:32,120 --> 00:35:34,759 Speaker 2: But we are practically done with this episode, but we 780 00:35:34,840 --> 00:35:35,760 Speaker 2: got one more story.