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Speaker 1: your favorite store. Second date of date. When you're on
Speaker 1: a date, I think the goal for a lot of
Speaker 1: people is to just get to a point where you
Speaker 1: can finally let your guard down. Yeah, that's the best part. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and just try to do what animals do. Oh wait what? Oh?
Speaker 1: All the way down and what better place to see
Speaker 1: animals do and what they do than at the local zoo.
Speaker 1: Oh and that's where one of our listeners, Chris, took
Speaker 1: his date and now she's not calling him back. Chris,
Speaker 1: what's going on? Man? You go animal style at the
Speaker 1: zoo with your date. We had a very nice date
Speaker 1: at the zoo. He's like, I don't know how to
Speaker 1: answer that. No one ever. YEA, So tell us about
Speaker 1: the girl that you went out with. What's her name?
Speaker 1: Her name's Ellie, Ellie. Where'd you meet her? We matched
Speaker 1: on tender and then it was I wanted a not
Speaker 1: a very risky dat and so I was like, what
Speaker 1: about the zoo, and she immediately said, yes, it's actually
Speaker 1: like it's a great idea the zoo, Like there's always
Speaker 1: something to talk about. Look at a little bit of
Speaker 1: danger in there. Stick your arm in between the cages
Speaker 1: of the line cage, and it's a little bit of
Speaker 1: excitement that that's exactly the whole point. You're not allowed
Speaker 1: to But when you do get gets the blood top in,
Speaker 1: things start happening, isn't that right, Chris? That is? And
Speaker 1: she kept asking me what animals I want to see?
Speaker 1: And I've actually done this before, so I knew for
Speaker 1: a fact you don't want to go see the monkeys
Speaker 1: because they might feel poop at you. You don't want
Speaker 1: to go see the elephants because they're majestic animals, but
Speaker 1: they stink the high Heaven exactly. So I was sitting
Speaker 1: there going like, oh, maybe the drafts will be a
Speaker 1: safe bet. And she then suggested that her favorite animal
Speaker 1: is the penguin. The penguins, I mean, if you're wearing
Speaker 1: about penguins are so stinky, YEA, yeah, they're awesome, they're
Speaker 1: super clear to see. Yeah, but if they're the girl's favored,
Speaker 1: you have to do it. Yeah. But here's the thing
Speaker 1: with the penguins, though, is they have that little tunnel
Speaker 1: where you could look at them as their underwater. You
Speaker 1: can't smell down there, and there's not a lot of light,
Speaker 1: and it's kind of romantic. And so we were just
Speaker 1: standing there very naturally watching the penguins swim around underwater.
Speaker 1: I leaned the overdo her and kissed her. Okay, how
Speaker 1: was that received? She kissed me back, and it was like,
Speaker 1: this is nice. And penguins made for life. They do
Speaker 1: happy rock, how they made I know. They're much better
Speaker 1: than the philandering humans. So it sounds like things are
Speaker 1: going great. Yeah, And then this point she asks me
Speaker 1: kind of very flirtatiously. She's like, hey, have you seen
Speaker 1: this brain farting on the name? But it's the documentary
Speaker 1: about penguins that's out right now. She's like, have you
Speaker 1: seen this documentary? And I'm like, so, she's like really
Speaker 1: into penguins, really really into penguins. You're not talking about
Speaker 1: happy feet, right? A documentary okay, like March of the
Speaker 1: Penguins y, yeah, yeah, one of those very same thing
Speaker 1: as that. Okay, so she's like, have you seen it?
Speaker 1: And I was like no. She was like, why don't
Speaker 1: we go back to your place and watch it? Oh?
Speaker 1: That was I'm sorry by her part smooth. It was
Speaker 1: so into penguins. I wasn't even sure if she wanted
Speaker 1: to do like Netflix and Chill. It was this more
Speaker 1: of like that Geo and Krill, like you wanted to
Speaker 1: see everything. Yeah, both sound good to me, no matter
Speaker 1: what I mean. But are you into that? Because like
Speaker 1: it's it's cool when somebody has a really cool interest
Speaker 1: and they're really into it. Yeah, but you always hope
Speaker 1: it's not penguins. Penguins, okay anything. So did you end
Speaker 1: up doing that? No? No, we went back to my place,
Speaker 1: we put on the documentary and almost immediately we start
Speaker 1: making out. Yeah that pein, Yeah she knows enough about penguins. All. Ye,
Speaker 1: how was the makeout? Yeah it was pretty good because
Speaker 1: you got that British guy in the back with the
Speaker 1: monotonous voice talking David Attenborough or whatever penguin. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: So we're making out for about ten minutes and then
Speaker 1: I hear he's jangling at the front door. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: do not tell me you have a wife. Oh, I
Speaker 1: have a maid service. Oh okay, so you have a
Speaker 1: maid come in? Yeah, because I don't have a lot
Speaker 1: of control over what time she shows up. My maid
Speaker 1: and I didn't even know we were coming back to
Speaker 1: my place until we were at the zoo, so I
Speaker 1: wasn't planning on that. She wanted to make out with
Speaker 1: you with a dirty place. Good job, clean, Yet lots
Speaker 1: of ladies like dirty places. You keep telling yourself that, buddy.
Speaker 1: Did you tell the maid like, sorry, I'm in the
Speaker 1: middle of something here, can you come back later? No,
Speaker 1: this is not a case. If she's there, she's already
Speaker 1: traveled a long distance and so be kind of rude
Speaker 1: to send her away. So you just let her clean
Speaker 1: around while you guys were kissing. No, no, no, no.
Speaker 1: I was like, all right, she's going to obviously clean
Speaker 1: the living room. I was like, why don't you and
Speaker 1: I go to the bedroom. No, you can't do that. No,
Speaker 1: you needed to rain check at that point, say, oh, man,
Speaker 1: you know what my housekeepers here, Let's go get coffee
Speaker 1: or something a vacuum. Man, what did she say to
Speaker 1: the bedroom invitation? Were was it? But like, like you
Speaker 1: just said, it was the long choice. Yeah, And then
Speaker 1: the coop. The drab was then my maid needed to
Speaker 1: get into my bedroom, so we had to switch rooms.
Speaker 1: I was like wow, And at that point Ellie was like, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's done. It's not Yeah, yeah, it's done. Man. You
Speaker 1: just like it would have been perfect if you would
Speaker 1: have just ended it when the housekeeper came. Now, but
Speaker 1: I can't hop into mind. Lauren fix that, I know.
Speaker 1: So she hasn't texted or called or anything like the
Speaker 1: momentum was that ruined, I guess so. Or maybe she
Speaker 1: thought I was desperate because I was like, let's keep
Speaker 1: switching room. Yeah, yeah, quiet, you were trying real hard
Speaker 1: to make it work. Yeah, all right, well we're gonna
Speaker 1: try and make it work for you. Okay, there's something here.
Speaker 1: Let's play a song, we'll come back. We'll call Ellie
Speaker 1: for you, and we'll try and get you your second
Speaker 1: date update. Okay, that would be awesome, all right. Hold on.
Speaker 1: The human mail is a clever and finicky creature. He
Speaker 1: seeks to find a suitable mate online, willing to join
Speaker 1: him back at his pleasure. Then, and this particular male, Chris,
Speaker 1: knows just the bait to lure her in. An unsuspecting
Speaker 1: female in a documentary about Emperor Penguins. I kind of
Speaker 1: like that. Although beautiful, the dating world can be a
Speaker 1: mysterious and unforgiving place as well, full of surprises, because
Speaker 1: just before he can complete his mating dance, Chris gets
Speaker 1: an unexpected visitor. Oh, a housekeeper arriving to assume her
Speaker 1: duties and spoil the mood. Chris is not pleased. Oh,
Speaker 1: and now we're about to witness one of the most
Speaker 1: spectacular and peculiar rituals in the mating Kingdom. A second
Speaker 1: date update to see if we can save the mood.
Speaker 1: I don't want regular Jeffrey bring back doc if you're
Speaker 1: just tuning in for the second date update. Chris wants
Speaker 1: our help getting back in touch with his date named Ellie.
Speaker 1: He was able to get her back to his place
Speaker 1: where they were watching a penguin documentary before a maid
Speaker 1: came in and ruin the mood. So now he's hoping
Speaker 1: he can get things back on track with a second
Speaker 1: date update. Do you think that there could be something
Speaker 1: else besides you know, the housekeeper coming in? No, because
Speaker 1: I've gone over this, like there's a Vooder film and
Speaker 1: everything was going great. Then you know, three's a crowd
Speaker 1: and that will in the move. Is this weird that
Speaker 1: she wouldn't be calling you back right? Like? Yeah, that's
Speaker 1: the weird part because I can guarantee, like the next
Speaker 1: time there won't be three people maybe that Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: what was the maid wearing? No one else? She's just
Speaker 1: turned off because like he means, you don't clean your
Speaker 1: own house. I don't know. Let's just call Ellie and
Speaker 1: see what she has to say. Get your second date update.
Speaker 1: You're ready, Chris, I'm ready? Thank you? All right, here
Speaker 1: we go. I'm dial the number right now. Hello. Hi,
Speaker 1: I'm looking for Ellie. Yeah, hi Ellie. My name is
Speaker 1: Jeffrey from the radio show Brooke and Jeffrey in the Morning.
Speaker 1: How you doing. What's this about? Well, this is about
Speaker 1: a segment that we do on our show, and you're
Speaker 1: going to be the star of it. Okay, it's a
Speaker 1: good thing, I promise, Well I think, I don't promise.
Speaker 1: I'm hoping it's a good thing because we're doing something
Speaker 1: called a second date update. That's where if you go
Speaker 1: out with someone and afterwards, if that person isn't calling
Speaker 1: you back, you can email our show and we'll reach
Speaker 1: out to that person for you. To try and figure
Speaker 1: out the reason why. Oh, you're being serious. I thought
Speaker 1: you was joking about it. I'm kind of a joke
Speaker 1: but I never joke about anything. Ever, It's really hard
Speaker 1: to tell what you're joking about and what you're not
Speaker 1: joking about. Right now, well, I'm just going to drop
Speaker 1: the jokes and in all honesty, one of our listeners
Speaker 1: is trying to get a hold of you. His name's Chris. Oh,
Speaker 1: how do you know about this? Well, because he emailed
Speaker 1: us and it's hold us a little bit about how
Speaker 1: you two met and that you guys went out for
Speaker 1: a date and on his account, it was a really
Speaker 1: nice time for the majority of your date. Yeah, he
Speaker 1: really liked you a lot. Okay, so now he's confused
Speaker 1: because afterwards he's been struggling to get a hold of
Speaker 1: you and he's hoping to figure out why. All right,
Speaker 1: and he told you about all this, He told us
Speaker 1: a lot of stuff. But like, how do you feel
Speaker 1: I mean, did you like him when you guys were
Speaker 1: hanging out? It sounds like you liked him a lot
Speaker 1: because he told us that. Like you're the one that
Speaker 1: suggested to go back and watch the Penguin documentary. At
Speaker 1: his house, which I thought smooth, very good moons. How
Speaker 1: he just tells everything, doesn't he is that? Okay? I
Speaker 1: mean there's nothing embarrassing that he told us, No, not
Speaker 1: for me. Well wait, what does that mean? I mean,
Speaker 1: he's just I think he's really weird. So what makes
Speaker 1: you think that? Well, yeah, we went to see a
Speaker 1: documentary on penguins because I love penguins and it's to
Speaker 1: get a little flirty and stuff, you know, and well
Speaker 1: it's so funny. Okay, Well, his maid walks in, and
Speaker 1: I mean he told us about that that it kind
Speaker 1: of interrupted the mood and took things down a level.
Speaker 1: But he feels really bad about it. And to be fair,
Speaker 1: it's not like he planned it. I mean, he didn't
Speaker 1: know that you guys were going back to his place.
Speaker 1: He just had the housekeeper scheduled. I mean, it definitely
Speaker 1: grew in the mood and it's not his fault technically,
Speaker 1: but he acted really weird towards her. Towards the housekeeper, Yeah,
Speaker 1: what do you mean, he like jumped up when she came,
Speaker 1: like immediately and gave her a hug. He hugged her. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I don't think that, dude. I think it's fine. I mean,
Speaker 1: this person is cleaning your house, and if she's been
Speaker 1: cleaning his house for a long time, like you can
Speaker 1: establish a relationship. Everybody knows you'd never hug the help brool.
Speaker 1: You don't make eye contact. You can, you can maybe
Speaker 1: maybe like have a little bit of a word or two,
Speaker 1: but you don't want to give him the wrong idea.
Speaker 1: What are you talking about? This person is in your stuff,
Speaker 1: like literally see like plumbers and stuff. Do you hug
Speaker 1: them if they were at my house every week? And sure?
Speaker 1: So that's why you're not calling him back is because
Speaker 1: he hugged his housekeeper. Not just that, Like she came
Speaker 1: in a french maid outfit, like the type that you
Speaker 1: can be on Halloween, like oking, she was dressed like
Speaker 1: a sexy french maid. Yeah, like the feather duster that
Speaker 1: doesn't do anything. And yeah, so you think he's hiring
Speaker 1: her just because she's hot. I'm confusing. Yeah, I don't
Speaker 1: know why he's doing it, but that was a red flat.
Speaker 1: I don't know why he's doing that either, Ellie, but
Speaker 1: I do know how we can find out, and that's
Speaker 1: by just straight up asking him. Because he's on the
Speaker 1: other line listening and he wants to join this conversation.
Speaker 1: He's on the phone. Yeah, yeah, yeah, he's been waiting
Speaker 1: like a little dirty boy that he is. Chris. Yep, yep,
Speaker 1: that's all you got, Chris, Um, I have an answer here,
Speaker 1: But if I give the answer, you're going to think
Speaker 1: even worse of the situation. And it's not the case.
Speaker 1: It's actually a very innocent mistake. And I think I
Speaker 1: was trying to plaster over it with a white eye
Speaker 1: and it's actually gotten worse. Just spit it out, Chris. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I think you're already in a pretty bad position as
Speaker 1: it is. I don't think it could get much Okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 1: I do not have a housekeeper, a maid. I do
Speaker 1: not have a cleaning service. A woman who came over
Speaker 1: and has keys to my apartment is my mother, who Now,
Speaker 1: your mom is the one that showed up in a
Speaker 1: French maid outfit because she's a theatrical person. Yes, when
Speaker 1: it's been she would drive me around in high school.
Speaker 1: She wouldn't wear a chauffeur's outfit. Wait, hold on, okay,
Speaker 1: hold on. You live with your mom in a one
Speaker 1: bedroom apartment, or your mom comes over dress as a
Speaker 1: sexy French maid to clean your house. Neither a good office. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it is a French outfit. I do not think it
Speaker 1: is a sexy outfit, and I think it's just to
Speaker 1: get into character. You couldn't ask her to come back
Speaker 1: if it's your mom when I was cleaning your apartment.
Speaker 1: She only does it like maybe once or twice a month,
Speaker 1: and she's coming from all the way across now, and
Speaker 1: I don't want to ask her to go back because
Speaker 1: it's late, and I she I don't want to drive
Speaker 1: about that time. So you were making out with her
Speaker 1: while your mom was in the other room vacuuming. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's not weird though again dressed and not normal aid
Speaker 1: not normal. I thought it was going to be like
Speaker 1: some weird s and M thing he was into. And
Speaker 1: I'm actually now better with that than I end with. No, no, no, no,
Speaker 1: this is not This is not an M thing. This
Speaker 1: is a completely normal thing. And I would just like
Speaker 1: to say that my mom thinks you really cute, Ellie.
Speaker 1: She thought you had a great figure and she so
Speaker 1: she was like, you did very well for yourself to that.
Speaker 1: Did you just say that your mom thought that Ellie
Speaker 1: had a nice figure again, you're making it weird when
Speaker 1: you put interest on it. I'm just trying to clarify.
Speaker 1: You know, you could have introduced me, say to her,
Speaker 1: if that was your mom, what would that be better
Speaker 1: responsibility there? I was caught flat footed. I didn't know.
Speaker 1: I know my mom when she's in her cleaning character.
Speaker 1: She likes to stay in character. So I when I
Speaker 1: went over there in a hugger, I briefly whispered in
Speaker 1: her ears like, hey, you do your day. We're gonna
Speaker 1: go to the bedroom. You you do your thing, and
Speaker 1: you clean my apartment because I'm a grown man and
Speaker 1: I'm gonna make out with a woman in my bedroom.
Speaker 1: This is there are so many red flags here. You're
Speaker 1: the coolest mom ever, Honestly, she's I think my mom
Speaker 1: is very cool. Most people think my mom is cool.
Speaker 1: And I bet you she cooked for you are a
Speaker 1: grown man, do your own she that's a selling point
Speaker 1: if I've ever heard. Okay with that said, man, would
Speaker 1: you like to go out on one more date with Chris?
Speaker 1: We will pay for it. I'm good, dude, Come on, Chris.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, man, I'm really bummed out. I didn't I
Speaker 1: didn't realize my mom screwed the whole thing up. No, no,
Speaker 1: you screwed the whole thing up. I'm bummed out for you, Chris,
Speaker 1: because now Ellie won't be able to go out in
Speaker 1: the second date and meet your dad as the butler
Speaker 1: or the police officer. Yeah, man Brook and Jeffrey in
Speaker 1: the morning.