1 00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:02,560 Speaker 1: Welcome to How the Money. I'm Joel and I and 2 00:00:02,640 --> 00:00:26,840 Speaker 1: Matt and today we're talking about staying focused with Kurt Steinhorst. Yeah, Joe, 3 00:00:26,840 --> 00:00:29,520 Speaker 1: there are countless ways that we're distracted in our lives today, 4 00:00:29,560 --> 00:00:32,400 Speaker 1: and these distractions are keeping us from doing good things 5 00:00:32,400 --> 00:00:35,440 Speaker 1: we truly need to do. And it is very easy 6 00:00:35,440 --> 00:00:38,839 Speaker 1: for us to allow ourselves to be constantly barraged by notifications, 7 00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:42,600 Speaker 1: social media or by email. And these distractions are keeping 8 00:00:42,680 --> 00:00:45,280 Speaker 1: us from being good friends and family members at home, 9 00:00:45,440 --> 00:00:48,200 Speaker 1: and they're keeping us from being productive and engaged at work. 10 00:00:48,720 --> 00:00:50,960 Speaker 1: That's why we are stoked to be talking with distraction 11 00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:54,400 Speaker 1: expert Kurt Steinhorst today. Kurt wrote the book Can I 12 00:00:54,440 --> 00:00:58,040 Speaker 1: Have Your Attention? Inspiring better work habits, focusing your team 13 00:00:58,040 --> 00:01:01,280 Speaker 1: and getting stuff done, and the constantly connected workplace. Joe, 14 00:01:01,360 --> 00:01:03,680 Speaker 1: we often talk about ways to save money, but today's 15 00:01:03,720 --> 00:01:05,679 Speaker 1: conversation we're going to focus on how we can do 16 00:01:05,720 --> 00:01:08,960 Speaker 1: a better job earning money by focusing our attention on 17 00:01:09,000 --> 00:01:11,720 Speaker 1: what matters the most. So, Kurt, thanks so much for 18 00:01:11,800 --> 00:01:14,280 Speaker 1: joining us today. Hey, thanks for having me. I'm excited 19 00:01:14,280 --> 00:01:16,800 Speaker 1: to be here. Awesome, Hey, Kurt, and we're excited to 20 00:01:16,840 --> 00:01:18,360 Speaker 1: We're gonna give away a couple of year books, so 21 00:01:18,560 --> 00:01:20,280 Speaker 1: the listeners stay tuned. At the end of the episode, 22 00:01:20,280 --> 00:01:22,480 Speaker 1: we'll we'll talk about how you can win one of 23 00:01:22,760 --> 00:01:25,760 Speaker 1: Kurt's books. And by the way, Kurt, every week on 24 00:01:25,800 --> 00:01:28,080 Speaker 1: the show, Matt and I we drink a beer. We're 25 00:01:28,120 --> 00:01:30,720 Speaker 1: super into craft beer, and for us it is this 26 00:01:30,840 --> 00:01:34,240 Speaker 1: kind of splurge that helps us to in the here 27 00:01:34,280 --> 00:01:37,360 Speaker 1: and now enjoy something that we love. While in the 28 00:01:37,400 --> 00:01:40,240 Speaker 1: process of enjoying something that we love, we're saving for 29 00:01:40,280 --> 00:01:43,280 Speaker 1: the future. So we asked our first question every guest 30 00:01:43,319 --> 00:01:46,280 Speaker 1: is kind of what's your splurge? What's your craft beer equivalent? So, Kurt, 31 00:01:46,319 --> 00:01:51,360 Speaker 1: what's yours? Well, asides from craft beer. Uh, my wife 32 00:01:51,400 --> 00:01:53,240 Speaker 1: and I had a kid about a year ago, was 33 00:01:53,360 --> 00:01:57,760 Speaker 1: our third child, and we decided right at the beginning 34 00:01:57,800 --> 00:02:00,920 Speaker 1: that we're gonna have someone come in and help us 35 00:02:01,040 --> 00:02:03,800 Speaker 1: with all of the stuff we don't like doing. So 36 00:02:04,200 --> 00:02:06,559 Speaker 1: this isn't like the deep clean once every couple of weeks. 37 00:02:06,840 --> 00:02:09,600 Speaker 1: We have someone that comes in um every other day 38 00:02:09,720 --> 00:02:14,080 Speaker 1: and does all of the laundry, the dishes, you name it, 39 00:02:14,160 --> 00:02:17,680 Speaker 1: and I can't we we initially we're going to just 40 00:02:17,720 --> 00:02:20,720 Speaker 1: do it for the first two months and it has 41 00:02:20,800 --> 00:02:26,280 Speaker 1: become so amazing, Like there's just something crazy about coming 42 00:02:26,280 --> 00:02:28,000 Speaker 1: home from work and saying, you know what, I don't 43 00:02:28,000 --> 00:02:30,520 Speaker 1: have to do today, the stuff that normally takes an 44 00:02:30,560 --> 00:02:33,440 Speaker 1: hour of the four hour window that I have not working. 45 00:02:33,600 --> 00:02:35,760 Speaker 1: And so that's probably the biggest flags that I have 46 00:02:35,840 --> 00:02:40,680 Speaker 1: on my on my income statement, I should say no 47 00:02:40,760 --> 00:02:43,560 Speaker 1: crummy chores for Kurt. I like that. Yeah. Plus, but 48 00:02:43,639 --> 00:02:45,400 Speaker 1: this isn't an episode we can allow our wives to 49 00:02:45,480 --> 00:02:49,480 Speaker 1: hear now they're doing that. That's something that we prioritize. Hey, 50 00:02:49,480 --> 00:02:53,639 Speaker 1: could you guys be a little more like hurt. They 51 00:02:53,680 --> 00:02:55,480 Speaker 1: just need to talk to my wife, I promise, Uh, 52 00:02:55,680 --> 00:03:00,320 Speaker 1: they'll the change in perspective. Awesome, Well, thanks for sharing 53 00:03:00,320 --> 00:03:02,760 Speaker 1: that with us. Man and Court. You're all about helping 54 00:03:02,800 --> 00:03:05,760 Speaker 1: folks reclaim their ability to focus. Right. Your book Can 55 00:03:05,800 --> 00:03:08,400 Speaker 1: I Have your Attention is dedicated to that topic. So 56 00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:11,320 Speaker 1: how did you get interested in our ability to focus? 57 00:03:11,360 --> 00:03:14,600 Speaker 1: And why have you chosen to be a distraction expert? 58 00:03:15,440 --> 00:03:18,440 Speaker 1: You know, ironically it all started because I was diagnosed 59 00:03:18,480 --> 00:03:20,840 Speaker 1: with a d D when I was a kid. So 60 00:03:21,360 --> 00:03:24,720 Speaker 1: there's something about someone who studies and teaches and rights 61 00:03:24,760 --> 00:03:27,320 Speaker 1: on focus with the condition that says he can't do it. 62 00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:32,280 Speaker 1: But you know, I was never medicated um and and 63 00:03:32,320 --> 00:03:35,000 Speaker 1: did well in school, but had challenges around focus. I've 64 00:03:35,000 --> 00:03:36,760 Speaker 1: always been challenged aro on focus while at the same 65 00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:40,720 Speaker 1: time being capable of really zooming in and focusing on 66 00:03:40,760 --> 00:03:43,440 Speaker 1: things that are interesting to me. But it was in 67 00:03:43,480 --> 00:03:47,640 Speaker 1: two thousand eleven that I branched off and started my 68 00:03:47,680 --> 00:03:52,200 Speaker 1: own communications consultancy and was truly doing what I love. 69 00:03:52,320 --> 00:03:54,320 Speaker 1: Like it was it was fulfilling my dream and it 70 00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:58,320 Speaker 1: was going well. But for the first time ever, I 71 00:03:58,360 --> 00:04:02,720 Speaker 1: would look up and I would have fifteen emails I 72 00:04:02,760 --> 00:04:06,000 Speaker 1: had started. I'd have two major projects that I couldn't 73 00:04:06,040 --> 00:04:08,280 Speaker 1: get finished. I couldn't figure out how to get to 74 00:04:08,320 --> 00:04:11,839 Speaker 1: the bank, and the hundreds of things coming at me 75 00:04:12,120 --> 00:04:15,960 Speaker 1: made me feel just completely overwhelmed. And and that's what 76 00:04:16,040 --> 00:04:19,440 Speaker 1: started the journey from it being a personal thing to saying, Okay, 77 00:04:19,839 --> 00:04:22,000 Speaker 1: this is so painful. I mean, They're gonna have to 78 00:04:22,520 --> 00:04:25,440 Speaker 1: move in with my parents or or I'm gonna have 79 00:04:25,440 --> 00:04:27,000 Speaker 1: to get on top of it. And and so it 80 00:04:27,040 --> 00:04:30,080 Speaker 1: never was intended originally to be something that I I 81 00:04:30,160 --> 00:04:33,839 Speaker 1: did as my full focus. But what ends up happening 82 00:04:33,880 --> 00:04:36,599 Speaker 1: is I'm I'm speaking and working with clients on the 83 00:04:36,600 --> 00:04:38,800 Speaker 1: other side of attention, how do you get people's attention? 84 00:04:39,400 --> 00:04:42,479 Speaker 1: And the more and more consistent theme was it turns 85 00:04:42,480 --> 00:04:46,479 Speaker 1: out everyone is struggling. It's not just the people that 86 00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:49,479 Speaker 1: were diagnosed as a kid. And so it started there 87 00:04:49,480 --> 00:04:53,160 Speaker 1: and and seven years later that's all I've been working on. 88 00:04:53,839 --> 00:04:57,720 Speaker 1: So really it kind of begun out of this inability 89 00:04:57,760 --> 00:05:00,520 Speaker 1: to kind of focus your own attention and then your life. 90 00:05:00,600 --> 00:05:02,800 Speaker 1: And and then you did did do? You start to 91 00:05:02,839 --> 00:05:04,280 Speaker 1: do a lot of research, I guess, and and then 92 00:05:04,279 --> 00:05:06,320 Speaker 1: it led you down this path of just kind of 93 00:05:06,400 --> 00:05:08,320 Speaker 1: oh my gosh, this is a bigger problem than I 94 00:05:08,320 --> 00:05:11,920 Speaker 1: thought it was. Yeah, it was. It was dual layered 95 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:14,440 Speaker 1: in the sense that the first step anyone goes to 96 00:05:14,640 --> 00:05:18,480 Speaker 1: when they hear about I'm distracted is you jump into 97 00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:23,640 Speaker 1: the self help productivity world. And so my first aim 98 00:05:23,760 --> 00:05:26,800 Speaker 1: was to do this, you know, perfectly efficient life in 99 00:05:26,880 --> 00:05:30,480 Speaker 1: every capacity. And what I quickly realized is that there's 100 00:05:30,520 --> 00:05:34,680 Speaker 1: this conversation occurring about how we feel distracted, overwhelmed. Then 101 00:05:34,680 --> 00:05:37,120 Speaker 1: there's this future version of us that we think we're 102 00:05:37,160 --> 00:05:41,200 Speaker 1: capable of, that set these highly unrealistic goals and and 103 00:05:41,400 --> 00:05:43,719 Speaker 1: you know what, I were really hit me was I 104 00:05:43,720 --> 00:05:46,560 Speaker 1: started asking the question, you know, is there something wrong 105 00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:49,719 Speaker 1: with the way that we're even approaching these questions and 106 00:05:50,040 --> 00:05:52,680 Speaker 1: the way that we're thinking about attention. And so it 107 00:05:52,760 --> 00:05:55,640 Speaker 1: was then that I started to say, Okay, there's actual, 108 00:05:55,720 --> 00:05:59,120 Speaker 1: real solutions when we understand the parameters of what it 109 00:05:59,200 --> 00:06:01,919 Speaker 1: is that actually um the way the way the human 110 00:06:01,960 --> 00:06:04,960 Speaker 1: brain is wired to have our attention captured and directed, 111 00:06:05,520 --> 00:06:08,360 Speaker 1: and and what the consequences are when we're out of control. 112 00:06:08,760 --> 00:06:10,520 Speaker 1: It's something that was born out of necessity, or is 113 00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:12,760 Speaker 1: what I'm hearing, and kind of dove into it some more. 114 00:06:13,160 --> 00:06:14,720 Speaker 1: I was hoping that you're going to say that you 115 00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:16,960 Speaker 1: kind of were distracted from doing something else that you're 116 00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:18,800 Speaker 1: supposed to have been doing. It's like I got one 117 00:06:18,839 --> 00:06:20,920 Speaker 1: on this tangent and look it took off. Well, why 118 00:06:20,920 --> 00:06:22,680 Speaker 1: am I distracted? Right now? Let me look? Let me 119 00:06:22,720 --> 00:06:26,320 Speaker 1: let me look that up on Wikipedia. Well, like, how 120 00:06:26,360 --> 00:06:28,800 Speaker 1: big of a problem is this? Like how much time 121 00:06:28,800 --> 00:06:31,000 Speaker 1: do we lose from our days because of our inability 122 00:06:31,120 --> 00:06:34,000 Speaker 1: to focus? Well, you know, there's there's a number of 123 00:06:34,000 --> 00:06:36,599 Speaker 1: ways that we um. We research and look at the 124 00:06:36,640 --> 00:06:39,360 Speaker 1: metrics and and I can give you several of them. 125 00:06:39,400 --> 00:06:43,800 Speaker 1: So on average, texts are received within three minutes of 126 00:06:43,800 --> 00:06:48,480 Speaker 1: her seat, Emails that are pushed to a device or 127 00:06:48,600 --> 00:06:53,479 Speaker 1: arena read within six seconds of her seat. Now it's unbelievable. 128 00:06:53,640 --> 00:06:57,200 Speaker 1: We're interrupted every two to three minutes. We check our 129 00:06:57,440 --> 00:07:01,080 Speaker 1: phones eighty five times a day. We spend three point 130 00:07:01,120 --> 00:07:04,440 Speaker 1: one hours of our time at work just on email. 131 00:07:04,480 --> 00:07:06,760 Speaker 1: And and you know when we see, like, what is 132 00:07:06,760 --> 00:07:11,000 Speaker 1: the cost of that of our time is spent just 133 00:07:11,360 --> 00:07:13,360 Speaker 1: trying to comb through data that we don't have the 134 00:07:13,360 --> 00:07:15,680 Speaker 1: ability to process. And so when you look at that 135 00:07:15,680 --> 00:07:19,480 Speaker 1: from an economic standpoint, that's about nine get this number 136 00:07:21,000 --> 00:07:24,400 Speaker 1: billion dollars as a cost to the economy. So there's 137 00:07:24,440 --> 00:07:26,120 Speaker 1: I can give several other when we think about it 138 00:07:26,120 --> 00:07:29,760 Speaker 1: from a macro standpoint, But from an individual standpoint, I 139 00:07:29,800 --> 00:07:32,680 Speaker 1: think it's more in the it's in the deep category 140 00:07:32,800 --> 00:07:38,840 Speaker 1: of of felt loss and unrealized opportunity. Because focus, by 141 00:07:38,840 --> 00:07:41,760 Speaker 1: its nature, if if you want to be excellent in anything, 142 00:07:42,200 --> 00:07:46,040 Speaker 1: it requires focus. If if you want to have deep relationships, 143 00:07:46,080 --> 00:07:50,080 Speaker 1: it requires undivided attention. I mean, name something that is 144 00:07:50,080 --> 00:07:53,040 Speaker 1: is that is about actually having the deepest things that 145 00:07:53,080 --> 00:07:57,000 Speaker 1: we really want, and it requires the ability to have 146 00:07:57,040 --> 00:07:59,960 Speaker 1: our attention in one place at the expense of everything else, 147 00:08:00,120 --> 00:08:02,960 Speaker 1: and distraction robs us from that. Yeah, and that's a 148 00:08:03,000 --> 00:08:04,760 Speaker 1: really good point. Yeah, the bigger things that we want 149 00:08:04,760 --> 00:08:07,280 Speaker 1: to accomplish often distraction is kind of what's getting in 150 00:08:07,320 --> 00:08:10,200 Speaker 1: the way of us actually being able to jump on 151 00:08:10,240 --> 00:08:13,360 Speaker 1: them to make them happen, and so they they reside 152 00:08:13,400 --> 00:08:14,880 Speaker 1: in the back of our mind like that that'd be 153 00:08:14,960 --> 00:08:16,760 Speaker 1: nice to get to but we never do because we 154 00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:19,720 Speaker 1: have this inability to focus. Yeah. And the unrealization though, 155 00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:21,720 Speaker 1: like that feels like disappointment, right, Like like when you 156 00:08:21,760 --> 00:08:23,280 Speaker 1: said that, Kurt, I was just like, yeah, Like, that's 157 00:08:23,280 --> 00:08:25,960 Speaker 1: that crappy feeling I have when I realized that that 158 00:08:26,080 --> 00:08:28,480 Speaker 1: thing that I say is important to me, that that 159 00:08:28,520 --> 00:08:30,960 Speaker 1: doesn't get done. Yeah, And that's that's kind of a 160 00:08:31,000 --> 00:08:36,040 Speaker 1: bummer feeling, it's. Yeah. So, Kurt, in your opinion, is 161 00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:41,440 Speaker 1: distraction mostly a new phenomenon or it kind of feels 162 00:08:41,480 --> 00:08:43,480 Speaker 1: like in my mind that we're in this kind of 163 00:08:43,559 --> 00:08:46,200 Speaker 1: new era of focus impairment. Where are you coming down 164 00:08:46,200 --> 00:08:48,800 Speaker 1: on that? Yeah? Yeah, So there's there's several ways to 165 00:08:48,800 --> 00:08:51,560 Speaker 1: think about it at the base level, and it depends 166 00:08:51,559 --> 00:08:55,120 Speaker 1: on how you define distraction. So I often joke some 167 00:08:55,160 --> 00:08:57,200 Speaker 1: people would say there were no distractions in the world 168 00:08:57,280 --> 00:08:59,400 Speaker 1: until a man came down from a mountain and delivered 169 00:08:59,440 --> 00:09:02,040 Speaker 1: to us. Tap is right, Which has that been points 170 00:09:02,040 --> 00:09:06,559 Speaker 1: in history, but clearly not the answer. So here's the 171 00:09:06,640 --> 00:09:09,000 Speaker 1: old the base system of attention in your brain. Like 172 00:09:09,360 --> 00:09:14,560 Speaker 1: human the human brain is wired primarily to seek out 173 00:09:14,679 --> 00:09:18,199 Speaker 1: new and fascinating and interesting things. We are wired for curiosity. 174 00:09:18,920 --> 00:09:21,360 Speaker 1: We're wired to be explorers too, Like we enter in 175 00:09:21,440 --> 00:09:23,959 Speaker 1: you know this, your babies and and the world. Everything 176 00:09:24,040 --> 00:09:26,160 Speaker 1: is new, and so we go and we explore, which 177 00:09:26,840 --> 00:09:29,760 Speaker 1: is actually what some people mean when they say they're distracted. 178 00:09:30,080 --> 00:09:32,800 Speaker 1: I keep being interested in new things. It's like, actually, 179 00:09:32,840 --> 00:09:35,400 Speaker 1: that's a human thing. So in that sense, that's always 180 00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:37,320 Speaker 1: been the case, and it's not a bad thing. And 181 00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:40,120 Speaker 1: in fact, one of the biggest things I always want 182 00:09:40,120 --> 00:09:43,839 Speaker 1: to remind people is are your is your model? Right? Here? 183 00:09:43,679 --> 00:09:45,400 Speaker 1: Are you? Are you seeking to be something that you're 184 00:09:45,440 --> 00:09:47,800 Speaker 1: not wired to be? Um, you're not very good as 185 00:09:47,800 --> 00:09:50,920 Speaker 1: a machine. But but here's the here's the shift for 186 00:09:51,480 --> 00:09:54,440 Speaker 1: that I think is really important to understand is, Um, 187 00:09:54,520 --> 00:09:57,600 Speaker 1: what technology has done is it has granted us access 188 00:09:57,640 --> 00:10:01,280 Speaker 1: to the infinite and so we've we've gone from a 189 00:10:01,280 --> 00:10:05,560 Speaker 1: world where our attention and focus was really quite limited 190 00:10:05,600 --> 00:10:09,120 Speaker 1: and bound by the spaces we occupy, by the communities, 191 00:10:09,160 --> 00:10:12,200 Speaker 1: a very small community of people, to a world where 192 00:10:12,240 --> 00:10:15,559 Speaker 1: we have everything available all the time, and our human 193 00:10:15,600 --> 00:10:18,440 Speaker 1: curiosity says we have to explore it. And so what 194 00:10:18,600 --> 00:10:21,120 Speaker 1: that means is we end up in a spot where 195 00:10:21,720 --> 00:10:26,120 Speaker 1: what was a natural human wiring is actually working significantly 196 00:10:26,120 --> 00:10:28,800 Speaker 1: against us, to the point that we are now what 197 00:10:28,800 --> 00:10:32,280 Speaker 1: we call distracted, which is really confusion about what deserves 198 00:10:32,280 --> 00:10:35,520 Speaker 1: our attention in a world where like everything is available 199 00:10:35,559 --> 00:10:38,360 Speaker 1: to us. So would you say that like years ago, 200 00:10:38,800 --> 00:10:44,520 Speaker 1: in kind of older cultures, even even years ago, that 201 00:10:45,040 --> 00:10:47,720 Speaker 1: basically the amount of distractions we had available to us, 202 00:10:47,760 --> 00:10:49,560 Speaker 1: We're just we're finite. There were just a few, and 203 00:10:49,559 --> 00:10:51,840 Speaker 1: they were probably less harmful at the same time, and 204 00:10:51,880 --> 00:10:54,640 Speaker 1: now we just have infinite distractions that we just can 205 00:10:54,720 --> 00:10:58,160 Speaker 1: easily pursue. That's exactly right. And and then I'll just 206 00:10:58,200 --> 00:11:02,040 Speaker 1: add one more layer between back then and now is 207 00:11:02,600 --> 00:11:05,439 Speaker 1: until about a hundred years ago, the people you lived with, 208 00:11:05,480 --> 00:11:07,440 Speaker 1: where the people you worked with, where the people you 209 00:11:07,440 --> 00:11:11,240 Speaker 1: did everything with. And why that really matters is because 210 00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:13,880 Speaker 1: if I live in a single community and I'm in 211 00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:17,320 Speaker 1: charge of let's say hunting and someone tries to distract 212 00:11:17,320 --> 00:11:19,599 Speaker 1: me from hunting, and no one eats. So there was 213 00:11:19,640 --> 00:11:23,959 Speaker 1: like there was a built in incentive to actually allow 214 00:11:24,160 --> 00:11:29,560 Speaker 1: and almost force people to focus on their part in 215 00:11:29,679 --> 00:11:31,880 Speaker 1: what the whole team needs. Well, now, like we're so 216 00:11:32,679 --> 00:11:36,200 Speaker 1: broadly connected, we have dozens of communities were associating with, 217 00:11:36,559 --> 00:11:39,040 Speaker 1: but none of those communities have any consequence if they 218 00:11:39,120 --> 00:11:41,960 Speaker 1: distract us from someone else. And so you add in 219 00:11:42,120 --> 00:11:44,040 Speaker 1: that layer, and what you end up with is the 220 00:11:44,080 --> 00:11:46,600 Speaker 1: people that need your attention, that you care the most 221 00:11:46,600 --> 00:11:50,640 Speaker 1: about actually become your biggest enemies of of focus. Like 222 00:11:50,679 --> 00:11:53,640 Speaker 1: they they there's an expectation that you should give your 223 00:11:53,679 --> 00:11:55,600 Speaker 1: attention to them at the very moment that it needs 224 00:11:55,600 --> 00:11:58,120 Speaker 1: to be elsewhere. And so now there's dual layers of 225 00:11:58,200 --> 00:12:02,320 Speaker 1: challenge on that. Essentially there's no more accountability, right, Like, 226 00:12:02,360 --> 00:12:04,360 Speaker 1: there's no one to answer to quite as much. Right 227 00:12:04,440 --> 00:12:06,760 Speaker 1: if if someone is depending on you for food, I mean, 228 00:12:06,760 --> 00:12:10,320 Speaker 1: now it's just your boss. And I'm sure bosses are 229 00:12:10,360 --> 00:12:12,520 Speaker 1: are fighting that the fact that they don't know or 230 00:12:12,640 --> 00:12:15,839 Speaker 1: or they're having a tough time measuring what employees are 231 00:12:15,840 --> 00:12:18,920 Speaker 1: are able to actually get done. Right, that's right, And 232 00:12:18,920 --> 00:12:21,880 Speaker 1: we still live on these outdated ideas of things like, 233 00:12:21,960 --> 00:12:24,199 Speaker 1: I mean, this happens if if if you work in 234 00:12:24,240 --> 00:12:28,480 Speaker 1: a larger historic organization, it's nearly to a t that 235 00:12:29,280 --> 00:12:31,839 Speaker 1: loyalty and responsibility. Are you a part of the team, 236 00:12:31,880 --> 00:12:34,760 Speaker 1: are you doing your job? Is? Is is equated with 237 00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:38,800 Speaker 1: how quickly you respond? So responsiveness is actually it's like 238 00:12:38,960 --> 00:12:41,199 Speaker 1: there's a built in incentive to that says you should 239 00:12:41,200 --> 00:12:44,320 Speaker 1: be distracted, but you should be focused. And and unfortunately, 240 00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:46,600 Speaker 1: in today's world, when everyone has access to everyone all 241 00:12:46,640 --> 00:12:50,200 Speaker 1: the time, the clear syndicator that you aren't focused is 242 00:12:50,200 --> 00:12:53,559 Speaker 1: if you're immediately responsive to everything. M yeah, that's so true. 243 00:12:53,920 --> 00:12:56,160 Speaker 1: Let's talk about multitasking for a little bit, right. We 244 00:12:56,200 --> 00:12:59,920 Speaker 1: often see these quick articles explaining how we're terrible multitaskers, 245 00:13:00,080 --> 00:13:02,800 Speaker 1: right and we shouldn't be doing that at all. But 246 00:13:03,000 --> 00:13:05,160 Speaker 1: you say in your book that that is not entirely true. 247 00:13:05,240 --> 00:13:09,720 Speaker 1: Can you explain why it is that we can multitask? Yeah, 248 00:13:09,720 --> 00:13:12,680 Speaker 1: this is a classic. We love these like simple headlines. 249 00:13:14,600 --> 00:13:16,920 Speaker 1: Tasking is a myth you should do one thing at 250 00:13:16,960 --> 00:13:19,400 Speaker 1: a time. I'm like, how's that working out for people? 251 00:13:20,240 --> 00:13:23,160 Speaker 1: How does that working out? Here's why, here's why that's 252 00:13:23,160 --> 00:13:27,400 Speaker 1: a that's an impossible standard. It's an impossible standard because, um, 253 00:13:27,480 --> 00:13:29,840 Speaker 1: if you only do one thing at a time, then 254 00:13:30,120 --> 00:13:33,360 Speaker 1: if you're focused on let's go back to the olden days. 255 00:13:33,600 --> 00:13:37,280 Speaker 1: If you're focused on fishing and an alliance coming to attack, 256 00:13:37,320 --> 00:13:40,880 Speaker 1: you guess what's going to happen. You're dying. You don't 257 00:13:40,880 --> 00:13:43,720 Speaker 1: make it. This is bad news. So you have that 258 00:13:43,760 --> 00:13:47,600 Speaker 1: purple vision, you know, that's right. Yeah, So the truth 259 00:13:47,679 --> 00:13:50,040 Speaker 1: is it depends on the tasks. There are some tasks 260 00:13:50,160 --> 00:13:53,280 Speaker 1: that you can do together. There's some tasks you can't, 261 00:13:53,800 --> 00:13:55,640 Speaker 1: and you need to just know what the consequences are. 262 00:13:55,760 --> 00:13:58,480 Speaker 1: So we call these like full focused tasks. If it 263 00:13:58,559 --> 00:14:02,160 Speaker 1: involves language, you can't do it two things at the 264 00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:05,880 Speaker 1: same time. You can't read a book and watch a show, 265 00:14:06,080 --> 00:14:09,280 Speaker 1: or you know, read Twitter or social media while watching 266 00:14:09,280 --> 00:14:12,640 Speaker 1: a show. Even though of us while watching TV actively 267 00:14:12,800 --> 00:14:16,680 Speaker 1: the seeing device, that's neither here nor there. Um, you 268 00:14:16,679 --> 00:14:19,040 Speaker 1: know we've all felt that. And here's what happens when 269 00:14:19,040 --> 00:14:21,240 Speaker 1: we try to do that. There's what we call re 270 00:14:21,320 --> 00:14:25,800 Speaker 1: orienting tax. So we're flipping back and forth and that 271 00:14:25,840 --> 00:14:28,760 Speaker 1: means that we're on average. It depends on how different 272 00:14:28,760 --> 00:14:31,480 Speaker 1: the task are. But we're slower. We don't feel it, 273 00:14:31,480 --> 00:14:33,920 Speaker 1: but we're less slower. The quality of the work goes 274 00:14:33,960 --> 00:14:37,960 Speaker 1: way down. Harvard NBA's when adding arithmetic basic arithmetic to 275 00:14:38,000 --> 00:14:40,200 Speaker 1: an essay assignment, the quality of the essay went down 276 00:14:40,240 --> 00:14:42,960 Speaker 1: to a second grader's level. We lose our most connection 277 00:14:43,000 --> 00:14:44,520 Speaker 1: with the work. And so that's why people say you 278 00:14:44,560 --> 00:14:47,960 Speaker 1: can't multitask, because if you can't do an email while 279 00:14:48,040 --> 00:14:50,760 Speaker 1: being in a meeting, now, why why would we do it? 280 00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:53,520 Speaker 1: Here's the reason. Um, the more tired we are, the 281 00:14:53,520 --> 00:14:56,520 Speaker 1: more we need external stimulation. And so you know, you 282 00:14:56,560 --> 00:14:58,760 Speaker 1: see me on a plane after I've done a full 283 00:14:58,840 --> 00:15:01,480 Speaker 1: day program with a client or something like that, and 284 00:15:01,560 --> 00:15:03,800 Speaker 1: I'm probably going to have a comedy on my iPad 285 00:15:03,800 --> 00:15:06,040 Speaker 1: and I'm gonna be responding to emails from my inbox. 286 00:15:06,760 --> 00:15:09,440 Speaker 1: And the truth is, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna 287 00:15:09,640 --> 00:15:13,360 Speaker 1: digest all of the comedy. And I'm also uh not 288 00:15:13,440 --> 00:15:15,840 Speaker 1: gonna write great emails. These are not gonna be poems. 289 00:15:15,880 --> 00:15:18,560 Speaker 1: There's on poetry. These aren't mission critical, and I'm gonna 290 00:15:18,600 --> 00:15:21,360 Speaker 1: do it slower. But the more tired we are, the 291 00:15:21,400 --> 00:15:24,200 Speaker 1: more we need a little background noise. And so as 292 00:15:24,240 --> 00:15:26,120 Speaker 1: long as I realized that I'm not gonna write my 293 00:15:26,280 --> 00:15:30,000 Speaker 1: next book while doing that, It's okay, And so we 294 00:15:30,080 --> 00:15:32,960 Speaker 1: just didn't know the cost. And then I'll add one 295 00:15:32,960 --> 00:15:36,400 Speaker 1: more piece to this multitasking. There's actually some tasks that 296 00:15:36,440 --> 00:15:39,240 Speaker 1: you can do that facilitate your capacity to do them well. 297 00:15:39,640 --> 00:15:43,880 Speaker 1: The concept is called soft fascination. That basically what happens 298 00:15:44,120 --> 00:15:47,840 Speaker 1: is if we have a little background noise, then what 299 00:15:47,880 --> 00:15:50,600 Speaker 1: it does is it ignites what we call the inhibitory 300 00:15:50,680 --> 00:15:52,880 Speaker 1: system of our brain, saying, oh, we have to block 301 00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:55,720 Speaker 1: everything out. So why is why do some people like 302 00:15:55,760 --> 00:15:57,960 Speaker 1: to work in coffee shops there's a little background noise. 303 00:15:58,520 --> 00:16:01,120 Speaker 1: Why do we listen to music without words? Because it 304 00:16:01,400 --> 00:16:05,240 Speaker 1: actually can facilitate our ability to focus. Why do I 305 00:16:05,280 --> 00:16:08,320 Speaker 1: love to listen to podcasts or audio books while I'm 306 00:16:08,360 --> 00:16:11,080 Speaker 1: cleaning dishes Because cleaning dishes doesn't take a lot of 307 00:16:11,120 --> 00:16:14,920 Speaker 1: active attention and I can then focus on my audio 308 00:16:15,000 --> 00:16:17,640 Speaker 1: book Otherwise I'll go crazy. So it's just understanding what 309 00:16:17,720 --> 00:16:21,360 Speaker 1: you compare and what you can't that's really helpful. Man Hey, 310 00:16:21,400 --> 00:16:23,840 Speaker 1: I want to get a little personal here, Kurt. You 311 00:16:24,000 --> 00:16:27,080 Speaker 1: personally as a working adult, where have you had the 312 00:16:27,080 --> 00:16:30,320 Speaker 1: hardest time keeping focused in avoiding distraction and maybe it's 313 00:16:30,320 --> 00:16:32,120 Speaker 1: not even just a particular area of your life, but 314 00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:34,000 Speaker 1: maybe it was kind of an era of your life, 315 00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:37,920 Speaker 1: Like was there a specific time in your life where, uh, 316 00:16:38,160 --> 00:16:39,960 Speaker 1: you know, you mentioned kind of the beginning and when 317 00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:42,880 Speaker 1: you got into kind of thinking about focus. Was that 318 00:16:42,920 --> 00:16:44,640 Speaker 1: the hardest time in your life that you you had 319 00:16:44,640 --> 00:16:47,480 Speaker 1: focusing or what's it? What's it been for you? Yeah? 320 00:16:47,520 --> 00:16:50,600 Speaker 1: A great question. I would say There's two ways that 321 00:16:50,680 --> 00:16:53,000 Speaker 1: I would would answer that, and the first one is 322 00:16:53,040 --> 00:16:55,840 Speaker 1: exactly the period you just mentioned. It was at that 323 00:16:55,880 --> 00:16:58,840 Speaker 1: moment when it was the volume of small tasks that 324 00:16:58,880 --> 00:17:03,520 Speaker 1: an entrepreneur has to do that left me overwhelmed. Now, 325 00:17:03,560 --> 00:17:05,879 Speaker 1: I say this with a caveat because I had a 326 00:17:05,960 --> 00:17:10,480 Speaker 1: job working at a talent agency doing speechwriting and speech coaching, 327 00:17:11,080 --> 00:17:12,840 Speaker 1: and the truth is I didn't work much than either, 328 00:17:13,359 --> 00:17:15,760 Speaker 1: but I mean I did enough to get my job done. 329 00:17:15,960 --> 00:17:18,639 Speaker 1: I think basic premise of the first part of my 330 00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:20,359 Speaker 1: book is that people aren't working and it's time to 331 00:17:20,720 --> 00:17:23,920 Speaker 1: stop acting like everyone's overworked, like they're overwhelmed. They're not overworked. 332 00:17:24,520 --> 00:17:26,439 Speaker 1: But it was at the moment I started my business 333 00:17:26,600 --> 00:17:30,840 Speaker 1: that no longer could I shield myself under a structure 334 00:17:31,080 --> 00:17:36,240 Speaker 1: that that actually didn't demand or reward focused effort. And 335 00:17:36,280 --> 00:17:38,520 Speaker 1: so yeah, that was definitely the period. And then the 336 00:17:38,560 --> 00:17:40,960 Speaker 1: other side of that is today, I would say that 337 00:17:41,720 --> 00:17:44,440 Speaker 1: as work has gotten busier and we've seen a lot 338 00:17:44,440 --> 00:17:47,639 Speaker 1: of growth, that it's a different struggle with focus in 339 00:17:47,640 --> 00:17:52,160 Speaker 1: the sense that it's just the number of tasks and um, 340 00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:55,320 Speaker 1: I'm I am, by every measure at this point quite focused. 341 00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:57,960 Speaker 1: But where I'll get stuck is that when I know 342 00:17:58,040 --> 00:18:00,320 Speaker 1: there's so much coming at me that I'll end up 343 00:18:00,359 --> 00:18:04,719 Speaker 1: looping and and like looping back to like, let's just 344 00:18:04,800 --> 00:18:06,679 Speaker 1: make sure I know what my to do list is 345 00:18:06,760 --> 00:18:09,120 Speaker 1: in my prioritized list, It's like do I have everything? 346 00:18:09,240 --> 00:18:13,800 Speaker 1: And so it's it's like an efficient focused distraction because 347 00:18:13,800 --> 00:18:16,320 Speaker 1: I'm not actually doing the work I'm I'm I'm listing 348 00:18:16,359 --> 00:18:20,159 Speaker 1: what I need to do, like triple checking stuff. That's right. Yeah, well, 349 00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:22,200 Speaker 1: I mean that almost makes sense there, right, because you're 350 00:18:22,200 --> 00:18:24,760 Speaker 1: almost like you're overly focused on the system and the 351 00:18:25,160 --> 00:18:26,720 Speaker 1: process and you want to make sure it's working as 352 00:18:26,760 --> 00:18:28,920 Speaker 1: efficiently as possible. But at the same time, that keeps 353 00:18:28,960 --> 00:18:31,880 Speaker 1: you from doing the true work, like that deep work 354 00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:33,879 Speaker 1: that that you actually want to get stuff done. I 355 00:18:33,880 --> 00:18:36,040 Speaker 1: can totally relate with that with the I've never used 356 00:18:36,040 --> 00:18:41,320 Speaker 1: that term looping, but uh I loop a lot. Cool, awesome. Well, 357 00:18:41,760 --> 00:18:43,680 Speaker 1: we want to ask you a little bit more. We're 358 00:18:43,680 --> 00:18:47,080 Speaker 1: gonna dive into kind of that responsiveness that we feel 359 00:18:47,119 --> 00:18:49,199 Speaker 1: that we owe to the people that are pinning us, 360 00:18:49,200 --> 00:18:51,640 Speaker 1: whether it's text messages or emails, and we also kind 361 00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:54,560 Speaker 1: of want to get into technology and how that impacts 362 00:18:54,560 --> 00:18:56,960 Speaker 1: our ability to focus, but then also the positive side 363 00:18:57,119 --> 00:19:00,439 Speaker 1: that technology can offer to helping us focus better. And 364 00:19:00,440 --> 00:19:02,359 Speaker 1: we'll get to some of that stuff right after this break. 365 00:19:11,200 --> 00:19:13,080 Speaker 1: All right, we're back from the break and we're talking 366 00:19:13,119 --> 00:19:16,639 Speaker 1: about staying focused with Kurt Steinhorst and Kurt, let's lie 367 00:19:16,680 --> 00:19:18,400 Speaker 1: back into it. Man. There are some areas in our 368 00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:20,880 Speaker 1: life that were we to be a bit more proactive 369 00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:22,840 Speaker 1: and how we manage them, that we would see a 370 00:19:22,920 --> 00:19:25,800 Speaker 1: significant improvement in our ability to focus and to get 371 00:19:25,800 --> 00:19:28,639 Speaker 1: work done right. One of these areas is the space 372 00:19:28,760 --> 00:19:31,399 Speaker 1: where we work. So let me give a personal example. 373 00:19:31,440 --> 00:19:33,240 Speaker 1: For a number of years, my full time office was 374 00:19:33,280 --> 00:19:37,639 Speaker 1: a desk in my bedroom. Not ideal. Yeah, after reading 375 00:19:37,640 --> 00:19:40,239 Speaker 1: your book, I can see the faults there, But can 376 00:19:40,280 --> 00:19:43,760 Speaker 1: you explain to us why this is a terrible idea. Yes, 377 00:19:43,960 --> 00:19:47,320 Speaker 1: I can explain very simply why that's a terrible idea. Well, 378 00:19:47,359 --> 00:19:49,399 Speaker 1: and first I should say I think every one of 379 00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:53,560 Speaker 1: the strategies that I would recommend involves doing things that 380 00:19:53,640 --> 00:19:56,920 Speaker 1: actually make it easier, not harder, Because any advice that's 381 00:19:56,960 --> 00:19:59,080 Speaker 1: like you need to do twenty more things in order 382 00:19:59,119 --> 00:20:02,399 Speaker 1: to save your attention is like, well, you're exasperating the 383 00:20:02,400 --> 00:20:04,400 Speaker 1: one thing you have the least of I can't get focused. 384 00:20:04,400 --> 00:20:05,760 Speaker 1: So how am I gonna have to do all these 385 00:20:05,800 --> 00:20:08,520 Speaker 1: hard things to get focused? Right? A couple of easy 386 00:20:08,560 --> 00:20:11,159 Speaker 1: things knocked down? That's right? Yeah, that set realistic. So 387 00:20:11,359 --> 00:20:13,720 Speaker 1: space is a really great place that you can either 388 00:20:13,800 --> 00:20:15,760 Speaker 1: have your brain and your attention working for you or 389 00:20:15,760 --> 00:20:20,080 Speaker 1: against you. It's that simple. The largest neural connection and 390 00:20:20,160 --> 00:20:22,800 Speaker 1: your brain between short term and long term memory is spatial. 391 00:20:23,240 --> 00:20:27,720 Speaker 1: What that means is that where you are says based 392 00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:29,879 Speaker 1: on what you've done in that space in the past. 393 00:20:30,040 --> 00:20:32,000 Speaker 1: It tells you what you should do, and we like 394 00:20:32,040 --> 00:20:34,480 Speaker 1: to take the path of least resistance. And so what 395 00:20:34,560 --> 00:20:38,919 Speaker 1: makes today so hard is that technology is agnostic to space. 396 00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:42,240 Speaker 1: You can be anywhere and do anything right. You don't 397 00:20:42,280 --> 00:20:45,119 Speaker 1: have to be in a place to do this particular thing. 398 00:20:45,160 --> 00:20:46,919 Speaker 1: I can be in on a beach and working. I 399 00:20:46,960 --> 00:20:49,320 Speaker 1: can be in my bedroom and working right. I can 400 00:20:49,320 --> 00:20:53,200 Speaker 1: be at work not working right. But what it has 401 00:20:53,400 --> 00:20:56,679 Speaker 1: it is convinced us of is that the better to 402 00:20:56,720 --> 00:20:59,760 Speaker 1: be able to do all these things everywhere. And in 403 00:20:59,800 --> 00:21:02,639 Speaker 1: the process it's made us failed to understand that it 404 00:21:02,680 --> 00:21:05,320 Speaker 1: has confused the cues in our brain as to what 405 00:21:05,320 --> 00:21:09,480 Speaker 1: we should do in particular places. And so really simple 406 00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:11,919 Speaker 1: way to start letting your brain work for you is 407 00:21:11,960 --> 00:21:17,320 Speaker 1: just is to um select a few particular areas where 408 00:21:17,880 --> 00:21:20,840 Speaker 1: the tasks and the work that you do are set 409 00:21:20,880 --> 00:21:24,240 Speaker 1: aside for that work. Like and I'm not saying everything like, look, 410 00:21:25,080 --> 00:21:27,240 Speaker 1: I'll get done with work, we'll put the kids to bed. 411 00:21:27,720 --> 00:21:29,000 Speaker 1: My wife and I have a routine. We talk, we 412 00:21:29,040 --> 00:21:30,640 Speaker 1: catch up on the day, and then you know, I'll 413 00:21:30,640 --> 00:21:33,280 Speaker 1: open up my computer on the couch and and I'll 414 00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:36,119 Speaker 1: send some emails. But the key is I have a vault. 415 00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:38,760 Speaker 1: I have a spot in my house and a spot 416 00:21:38,760 --> 00:21:41,399 Speaker 1: at work where I'm not going to be on my device, 417 00:21:41,920 --> 00:21:45,320 Speaker 1: where I'm gonna do the most important deep thinking that 418 00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:47,760 Speaker 1: I have to do in order to be successful. So 419 00:21:47,920 --> 00:21:50,880 Speaker 1: it's it's just picking those and really for any community, 420 00:21:50,920 --> 00:21:53,000 Speaker 1: any group of people that you care about, you need 421 00:21:53,040 --> 00:21:55,919 Speaker 1: to have a sacred places where we're satisfied, like the 422 00:21:55,920 --> 00:21:57,840 Speaker 1: dinner table. We're not gonna be on our devices because 423 00:21:57,840 --> 00:22:00,520 Speaker 1: we're gonna be here the you know, whatever they are. 424 00:22:00,560 --> 00:22:05,040 Speaker 1: And then invest. We're always thinking about saving money, but 425 00:22:05,280 --> 00:22:07,000 Speaker 1: one of the best things you can do is invest 426 00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:10,600 Speaker 1: to make that place really great, like make it visually 427 00:22:11,200 --> 00:22:14,320 Speaker 1: better than your phone. We have an upstairs game room 428 00:22:14,480 --> 00:22:17,760 Speaker 1: that has Star Wars and board games on the walls. 429 00:22:18,200 --> 00:22:20,440 Speaker 1: And it's because we decided that, you know, even though 430 00:22:20,480 --> 00:22:24,160 Speaker 1: it's the evening and we're tired if we're not careful, 431 00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:29,120 Speaker 1: Pepper Pig is a really great babysitter um and and 432 00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:31,879 Speaker 1: we wanted to have a place where we've had games 433 00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:34,640 Speaker 1: for the kids, but also where we'd rather sit than 434 00:22:35,040 --> 00:22:37,120 Speaker 1: sit in front of just the TV. And so it's 435 00:22:37,119 --> 00:22:39,560 Speaker 1: actually better, like we enjoy it. It's not oh, i 436 00:22:39,640 --> 00:22:41,960 Speaker 1: gotta stop watching TV. I gotta stop beyond my device. 437 00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:44,480 Speaker 1: I'm gonna sit here board like make a space that's 438 00:22:44,520 --> 00:22:47,560 Speaker 1: really awesome. Yeah, creating that better alternative. I love that. 439 00:22:47,560 --> 00:22:51,000 Speaker 1: It's great advice. And so, Kurt, this might be a 440 00:22:51,040 --> 00:22:53,600 Speaker 1: weird question. What would you do if you have a 441 00:22:53,640 --> 00:22:55,840 Speaker 1: space that you have to work in, but you've kind 442 00:22:55,840 --> 00:22:58,840 Speaker 1: of muddled those lines. Like let's say you're supposed to 443 00:22:58,840 --> 00:23:01,200 Speaker 1: get worked on in your office, but watched a lot 444 00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:04,080 Speaker 1: of YouTube cap videos while you're working, or you've kinda 445 00:23:04,440 --> 00:23:07,000 Speaker 1: Facebook far too often in that office. Like, how can 446 00:23:07,040 --> 00:23:12,200 Speaker 1: you like almost like cleanse your relationship to that space? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, 447 00:23:12,200 --> 00:23:14,560 Speaker 1: what can you do? Yeah? Two things? The first is 448 00:23:14,920 --> 00:23:18,840 Speaker 1: every office is different. Some people your backs against the wall, 449 00:23:18,920 --> 00:23:21,679 Speaker 1: and what I would say is find a different place 450 00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:25,359 Speaker 1: to at least pull away for short periods to it, 451 00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:30,280 Speaker 1: to assess and prioritize. Pause. This has priorities. Okay, now 452 00:23:30,359 --> 00:23:32,600 Speaker 1: with that in mind, this can happen to all of us. 453 00:23:33,240 --> 00:23:35,920 Speaker 1: I will never forget. I um, when I was in 454 00:23:35,960 --> 00:23:37,639 Speaker 1: the middle of writing my book, I have this spot 455 00:23:37,680 --> 00:23:41,520 Speaker 1: that I did that at, and um, but it's Tuesday 456 00:23:41,680 --> 00:23:44,719 Speaker 1: is Fantasy football waiver wire day, and all of a sudden, 457 00:23:44,840 --> 00:23:47,639 Speaker 1: like I'm checking it and so rather than feeling guilty, 458 00:23:47,720 --> 00:23:50,199 Speaker 1: I just said, hey, for the next week, if I 459 00:23:50,240 --> 00:23:52,000 Speaker 1: want to do that, I'm just gonna have to get 460 00:23:52,040 --> 00:23:54,760 Speaker 1: up and at least walk into the other room. And 461 00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:57,600 Speaker 1: so like it was, it was like a low barrier. 462 00:23:58,080 --> 00:24:00,439 Speaker 1: You have permission to do that anytime you want, just 463 00:24:00,560 --> 00:24:04,040 Speaker 1: literally walk ten steps. And so that's what I would 464 00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:06,960 Speaker 1: say is is whatever place that you have to do 465 00:24:07,119 --> 00:24:09,320 Speaker 1: the certain types of work, probably you don't want to do. 466 00:24:10,119 --> 00:24:12,119 Speaker 1: The things that you're doing on accident. They're just at 467 00:24:12,200 --> 00:24:13,800 Speaker 1: a seven day rule that says I'm going to do 468 00:24:13,800 --> 00:24:17,560 Speaker 1: it in a very convenient next spot, but not this 469 00:24:17,600 --> 00:24:19,720 Speaker 1: one in particular. Well, I like what you said. They're 470 00:24:19,720 --> 00:24:22,160 Speaker 1: about creating that barrier too, because even though it's not 471 00:24:22,520 --> 00:24:25,240 Speaker 1: crazy difficult, it's still something that you have to do 472 00:24:25,320 --> 00:24:27,960 Speaker 1: that separates you from that space. Right. It's it's still 473 00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:30,480 Speaker 1: not as easy as at least on for Mac users, 474 00:24:30,520 --> 00:24:32,879 Speaker 1: hitting hitting command tab and just like flipping over to 475 00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:35,080 Speaker 1: the next window and checking the email or checking the message, 476 00:24:35,160 --> 00:24:37,480 Speaker 1: or or hopping on Slack or something like that. That's 477 00:24:37,520 --> 00:24:39,560 Speaker 1: really easy to do. And I find myself doing that 478 00:24:39,640 --> 00:24:42,440 Speaker 1: even subconsciously without even realizing at times. It's like a 479 00:24:42,520 --> 00:24:46,600 Speaker 1: muscle movement, which exactly it's it's muscle memory. But removing 480 00:24:46,680 --> 00:24:49,560 Speaker 1: that where you actually have to do something novel. I mean, 481 00:24:49,840 --> 00:24:52,359 Speaker 1: I think that's that's so powerful, and not only does 482 00:24:52,440 --> 00:24:54,760 Speaker 1: it cause you like I think it would give me 483 00:24:54,840 --> 00:24:58,520 Speaker 1: pause to actually do that, but it would also instead 484 00:24:58,560 --> 00:25:01,520 Speaker 1: cause me to think I don't actually need to do that. Instead, 485 00:25:01,520 --> 00:25:03,159 Speaker 1: I want to continue to stay focused on what I 486 00:25:03,200 --> 00:25:05,520 Speaker 1: truly need to get done. That's right, that's right, and 487 00:25:05,560 --> 00:25:07,600 Speaker 1: I will will say. The other side of this coin 488 00:25:07,760 --> 00:25:10,440 Speaker 1: is and it moves into technology, but space and technology 489 00:25:10,520 --> 00:25:14,400 Speaker 1: so interwoven, like we want to find ways that those 490 00:25:14,440 --> 00:25:18,360 Speaker 1: things don't interrupt us. Right, It's there's you know, two 491 00:25:18,400 --> 00:25:21,199 Speaker 1: ways of being interrupted. One is self interruption, right that 492 00:25:21,280 --> 00:25:23,359 Speaker 1: we oh, random idea I want to come back, and 493 00:25:23,359 --> 00:25:25,560 Speaker 1: that's the cues in space. Like last time I was here, 494 00:25:25,600 --> 00:25:27,480 Speaker 1: I checked this here, and so for that we just 495 00:25:27,520 --> 00:25:29,200 Speaker 1: have to set a little hard rule that says we'll 496 00:25:29,200 --> 00:25:31,080 Speaker 1: make it a little bit more difficult. We can use 497 00:25:31,119 --> 00:25:33,400 Speaker 1: technology to cut it off, or we can just like 498 00:25:33,480 --> 00:25:35,760 Speaker 1: make this space fun. Um. But then there's this other 499 00:25:35,760 --> 00:25:39,240 Speaker 1: side it is, and it's how do we turn things off, 500 00:25:39,600 --> 00:25:42,600 Speaker 1: create barriers so that the things that we actually wouldn't 501 00:25:42,640 --> 00:25:46,200 Speaker 1: even had to remotely thought of don't come in and 502 00:25:46,280 --> 00:25:49,359 Speaker 1: demand our attention. It's like, um, if you want to 503 00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:52,440 Speaker 1: if you want to take your vitamins, have them out 504 00:25:52,520 --> 00:25:55,520 Speaker 1: in the place where you need to take where you're 505 00:25:55,520 --> 00:25:56,959 Speaker 1: gonna be at the moment you need to take them. 506 00:25:56,960 --> 00:25:59,880 Speaker 1: If you don't want to eat the Halloween candy, then 507 00:26:00,040 --> 00:26:02,359 Speaker 1: don't have it in the center of the kitchen table 508 00:26:02,720 --> 00:26:06,720 Speaker 1: which you walk by every single time. Like it's really simple. 509 00:26:06,920 --> 00:26:09,760 Speaker 1: And by the way, eat the candy if you want it, 510 00:26:09,800 --> 00:26:11,800 Speaker 1: but just make sure you have to think about it 511 00:26:11,880 --> 00:26:16,080 Speaker 1: rather than yelling at you. Yeah. So, so on that note, 512 00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:20,080 Speaker 1: with technology, you've talked about, how you know, obviously there 513 00:26:20,119 --> 00:26:22,359 Speaker 1: are a lot of issues with technology. Technology is one 514 00:26:22,359 --> 00:26:25,760 Speaker 1: of our biggest obstacles to actually focusing well. But on 515 00:26:25,800 --> 00:26:29,280 Speaker 1: the flip side, technology can actually help us improve our focus. 516 00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:32,120 Speaker 1: So so how do we implement technology into our lives 517 00:26:32,160 --> 00:26:34,320 Speaker 1: so that it's almost like a boon to our ability 518 00:26:34,359 --> 00:26:37,400 Speaker 1: to focus? Yeah, a great question. So there's a couple 519 00:26:37,400 --> 00:26:39,600 Speaker 1: of ways that this can work, and I should say 520 00:26:39,640 --> 00:26:43,919 Speaker 1: it starts with rejecting a fundamental premise and assumption that 521 00:26:44,520 --> 00:26:49,280 Speaker 1: people have around technology, which is that technologies job is 522 00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:51,679 Speaker 1: to keep you informed on everything all the time. Like 523 00:26:51,880 --> 00:26:54,320 Speaker 1: their job is to bring everything to you, and you're 524 00:26:54,320 --> 00:26:58,720 Speaker 1: supposed to filter. And so that's like the hidden hidden ideas, 525 00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:01,000 Speaker 1: like you drive by this play, we're gonna remind you 526 00:27:01,200 --> 00:27:03,600 Speaker 1: haven't been here. We're gonna remind you because you need 527 00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:06,480 Speaker 1: the information and you get filtered. Look what technology does 528 00:27:06,800 --> 00:27:09,080 Speaker 1: when we do it well now, is it filters for 529 00:27:09,119 --> 00:27:12,000 Speaker 1: you so that what gets to you is actually what 530 00:27:12,160 --> 00:27:15,520 Speaker 1: deserves your attention. That's the big pivot. And that means 531 00:27:15,520 --> 00:27:17,800 Speaker 1: we have to set some we have we have to 532 00:27:17,960 --> 00:27:21,320 Speaker 1: use programs and uh and and I'll give you a 533 00:27:21,320 --> 00:27:24,239 Speaker 1: few that will actually keep things from getting to you. 534 00:27:24,880 --> 00:27:28,000 Speaker 1: So um, a few. Let's look at our inbox. I 535 00:27:28,040 --> 00:27:30,600 Speaker 1: love occasionally getting a good coupon from J Crew. I 536 00:27:30,640 --> 00:27:33,800 Speaker 1: don't need that your bond at two pm on Wednesday, right, 537 00:27:33,960 --> 00:27:36,919 Speaker 1: And so I have a program called unrolled Me, Unrolled 538 00:27:37,000 --> 00:27:39,720 Speaker 1: up me. I get nothing from them, but they roll 539 00:27:39,920 --> 00:27:42,919 Speaker 1: up all those emails and help me on subscribe with 540 00:27:43,000 --> 00:27:45,640 Speaker 1: one click rather than like six steps where they say 541 00:27:45,640 --> 00:27:47,960 Speaker 1: tell me why you hate us? And I hate you? 542 00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:50,920 Speaker 1: You know, like and and so um. That means once 543 00:27:50,920 --> 00:27:53,040 Speaker 1: a day I get like every one of those that 544 00:27:53,080 --> 00:27:54,600 Speaker 1: I really want, and it makes it easy to get 545 00:27:54,680 --> 00:27:57,639 Speaker 1: rid of it. Another way that technology can help us 546 00:27:57,680 --> 00:28:00,000 Speaker 1: is increasingly, you know, the the features of the phone 547 00:28:00,000 --> 00:28:02,359 Speaker 1: own the idea of them telling you every week how 548 00:28:02,400 --> 00:28:04,840 Speaker 1: much screen time you've had that is Uh, that doesn't 549 00:28:04,840 --> 00:28:07,639 Speaker 1: help at all the metrics because it doesn't tell you 550 00:28:07,680 --> 00:28:11,679 Speaker 1: what you did with that. Yeah, it's like I feel guilty, 551 00:28:11,720 --> 00:28:13,240 Speaker 1: but it turns out like a lot of times we 552 00:28:13,240 --> 00:28:15,280 Speaker 1: should be on our devices if we're doing an email 553 00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:18,480 Speaker 1: or if it's something important, but on your device, like 554 00:28:18,880 --> 00:28:23,120 Speaker 1: go into settings, go to notifications and turn off every 555 00:28:23,160 --> 00:28:26,480 Speaker 1: notification that you don't want to get. Don't feel guilty 556 00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:28,040 Speaker 1: about the ones you want to get. If it's not 557 00:28:28,160 --> 00:28:30,320 Speaker 1: from a human, it's a good sign you should turn 558 00:28:30,359 --> 00:28:33,800 Speaker 1: it off. Odds are if you turn off my message 559 00:28:33,960 --> 00:28:36,439 Speaker 1: or WhatsApp or whatever program you do. When people are 560 00:28:36,480 --> 00:28:38,440 Speaker 1: concerned that they may miss a message, they go check 561 00:28:38,480 --> 00:28:40,440 Speaker 1: it as much as if they if it's pushed to 562 00:28:40,480 --> 00:28:42,880 Speaker 1: them as a general role and so um. Yeah, so 563 00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:45,400 Speaker 1: you want to create filters, like rather than go to 564 00:28:45,440 --> 00:28:47,600 Speaker 1: Twitter to or whatever source, Like I gotta check the 565 00:28:47,600 --> 00:28:52,160 Speaker 1: news all the time, Like, find a daily newsletter that 566 00:28:52,280 --> 00:28:54,880 Speaker 1: you actually trust to filter for you. So it's about 567 00:28:54,920 --> 00:28:58,800 Speaker 1: finding the the ways that technology can provide you all 568 00:28:58,800 --> 00:29:01,520 Speaker 1: the information you want in a format that doesn't take 569 00:29:01,840 --> 00:29:05,240 Speaker 1: your constant searching or constant interruption. Yeah, I feel like 570 00:29:05,280 --> 00:29:07,520 Speaker 1: so often we use technology to to get the new 571 00:29:07,560 --> 00:29:10,480 Speaker 1: and cool thing that we can receive. But we don't. Yeah, 572 00:29:10,480 --> 00:29:12,400 Speaker 1: like you said, we don't take that technology and turn 573 00:29:12,440 --> 00:29:15,480 Speaker 1: it on its head and use it to to limit 574 00:29:15,760 --> 00:29:18,120 Speaker 1: what we are consuming and what we're taking in in 575 00:29:18,200 --> 00:29:20,560 Speaker 1: curt something else, use it too. I mean essentially you're 576 00:29:20,560 --> 00:29:22,520 Speaker 1: you're talking about how we can use technology as a 577 00:29:22,520 --> 00:29:25,560 Speaker 1: tool and how it's not inherently evil, right, And that 578 00:29:25,560 --> 00:29:28,520 Speaker 1: this makes me think about how we often talk about money, 579 00:29:28,680 --> 00:29:31,760 Speaker 1: because I think some folks think about money as this 580 00:29:31,880 --> 00:29:34,479 Speaker 1: terrible thing and they see that, oh, if I can 581 00:29:34,520 --> 00:29:37,680 Speaker 1: get more of it, then it's going to fix everything. Right. 582 00:29:38,080 --> 00:29:40,280 Speaker 1: That's not actually the case. Right. If if you're terrible 583 00:29:40,320 --> 00:29:42,040 Speaker 1: with your money and you get a lot more of it, 584 00:29:42,080 --> 00:29:44,160 Speaker 1: well you're just going to continue to be bad with 585 00:29:44,200 --> 00:29:46,640 Speaker 1: your money, but just at a larger scale. Hence the 586 00:29:46,640 --> 00:29:51,440 Speaker 1: example every lottery winner every basically exactly. But but using 587 00:29:51,440 --> 00:29:54,280 Speaker 1: it as a tool takes being proactive, and it sounds 588 00:29:54,320 --> 00:29:57,280 Speaker 1: like that with technology there's a very similar relationship that 589 00:29:57,320 --> 00:30:02,080 Speaker 1: we can have. Yeah, totally. I think the I see 590 00:30:02,120 --> 00:30:05,680 Speaker 1: two habits or to two perspectives that are equally destructive, 591 00:30:05,760 --> 00:30:09,880 Speaker 1: which is there is the loud voice, the loud community 592 00:30:10,120 --> 00:30:13,680 Speaker 1: of you know, technologies gaming you. You're a victim. You're 593 00:30:13,720 --> 00:30:18,640 Speaker 1: incapable of restraint. You're the equivalent of monkey who is 594 00:30:18,680 --> 00:30:21,200 Speaker 1: going to do whatever the technology tells you. And so 595 00:30:21,240 --> 00:30:23,600 Speaker 1: there's a lot of gloom and doom about that. And 596 00:30:23,640 --> 00:30:26,440 Speaker 1: then you ask the people that are making those statements, um, 597 00:30:26,440 --> 00:30:29,040 Speaker 1: what device they're using, and they're gonna pull out their 598 00:30:29,080 --> 00:30:32,520 Speaker 1: iPhone so they don't believe that. And then there's this 599 00:30:32,600 --> 00:30:35,120 Speaker 1: other group that thinks technology is the answer to everything. 600 00:30:35,240 --> 00:30:40,080 Speaker 1: And here's the problem with that. You can't solve I'll 601 00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:42,880 Speaker 1: make a real practical You can't solve the problem of 602 00:30:42,920 --> 00:30:46,320 Speaker 1: your inbox with technology. And the reason is because the 603 00:30:46,400 --> 00:30:50,320 Speaker 1: people that send you mission critical messages from work also 604 00:30:50,400 --> 00:30:53,959 Speaker 1: send you funny cat videos, you know what I mean. 605 00:30:54,080 --> 00:30:57,680 Speaker 1: So these are these are human decisions that have you made. 606 00:30:57,680 --> 00:31:00,560 Speaker 1: And by the way, um, when when we attempt to 607 00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:04,160 Speaker 1: make technology increasingly efficient, so you know, you gotta get 608 00:31:04,160 --> 00:31:06,680 Speaker 1: to inbox zero, right, that's the goal. We gotta be 609 00:31:06,720 --> 00:31:09,960 Speaker 1: extremely efficient with our with our email. All that does 610 00:31:10,000 --> 00:31:11,840 Speaker 1: is it just makes us have higher volume and we're 611 00:31:11,880 --> 00:31:15,800 Speaker 1: still overwhelmed. So that's not a solution either. Um. Instead, 612 00:31:16,040 --> 00:31:19,080 Speaker 1: the real solution is to start with the premise of saying, Okay, 613 00:31:19,080 --> 00:31:21,600 Speaker 1: so what is the what what is worth my attention? 614 00:31:22,520 --> 00:31:25,600 Speaker 1: And how can I relate to technology in a way 615 00:31:25,760 --> 00:31:28,600 Speaker 1: that it it spotlights and brings to my attention what 616 00:31:28,640 --> 00:31:31,920 Speaker 1: I do care about and it keeps the crap away 617 00:31:32,000 --> 00:31:35,040 Speaker 1: from me that will distract me from what actually matters. 618 00:31:36,080 --> 00:31:38,560 Speaker 1: We touched on this a little bit earlier on about 619 00:31:38,560 --> 00:31:41,800 Speaker 1: that kind of feeling that we have in this just 620 00:31:41,880 --> 00:31:44,080 Speaker 1: kind of the current state of affairs in our country 621 00:31:44,320 --> 00:31:47,080 Speaker 1: of this need to be constantly accessible. A lot of 622 00:31:47,160 --> 00:31:48,840 Speaker 1: us in our job we feel like if we're not 623 00:31:48,920 --> 00:31:51,760 Speaker 1: checking our email every thirty minutes or every hour, that 624 00:31:51,880 --> 00:31:54,040 Speaker 1: we're going to miss something that's hypocritical that needs to 625 00:31:54,040 --> 00:31:58,000 Speaker 1: be responded to immediately. So, like, in your opinion, how 626 00:31:58,240 --> 00:32:02,000 Speaker 1: do we actually balance that need, that feeling inside that 627 00:32:02,040 --> 00:32:04,600 Speaker 1: we have to be responsive to the people that are 628 00:32:04,600 --> 00:32:07,200 Speaker 1: begging for our attention the email, via text, whatever it is. 629 00:32:07,520 --> 00:32:09,840 Speaker 1: With that kind of need to be able to get 630 00:32:09,880 --> 00:32:11,640 Speaker 1: off the grid and to be able to focus on 631 00:32:11,680 --> 00:32:14,480 Speaker 1: something for an extended period of time, how do we 632 00:32:14,560 --> 00:32:17,440 Speaker 1: kind of resolve that conflict in our minds. So you 633 00:32:17,760 --> 00:32:19,520 Speaker 1: nailed it by saying the first step is you have 634 00:32:19,520 --> 00:32:22,160 Speaker 1: to resolve in your mind to realize, like, there's something 635 00:32:22,200 --> 00:32:24,880 Speaker 1: wrong with that equation. And it makes perfect sense when 636 00:32:24,880 --> 00:32:28,280 Speaker 1: we understand human biology. Um, we survived as social animals, 637 00:32:28,320 --> 00:32:31,040 Speaker 1: which means that we if attention is is the measure 638 00:32:31,040 --> 00:32:32,760 Speaker 1: of what we value, right, we give our attention to 639 00:32:32,800 --> 00:32:35,320 Speaker 1: what we we care about. That's why we're so offended 640 00:32:35,360 --> 00:32:37,560 Speaker 1: when people don't give us their attention, Like that's why 641 00:32:37,560 --> 00:32:39,720 Speaker 1: I was i'ming a conversation. Some whe looks at their phone. 642 00:32:39,720 --> 00:32:42,120 Speaker 1: They're like, that's a generational thing. No, it's not like 643 00:32:43,120 --> 00:32:46,240 Speaker 1: everyone in all of history has been offended when someone 644 00:32:46,280 --> 00:32:48,600 Speaker 1: says you're not worth my attention, you know what I mean. 645 00:32:49,120 --> 00:32:53,160 Speaker 1: So if we understand that basic premise, the question is 646 00:32:53,640 --> 00:32:58,000 Speaker 1: how do we turn the relationships that are actually driving 647 00:32:58,040 --> 00:33:01,800 Speaker 1: that from being one of enemies for each other's attention 648 00:33:01,840 --> 00:33:05,720 Speaker 1: to actually being allies. And and this is this the 649 00:33:05,760 --> 00:33:09,600 Speaker 1: most critical step. You simply can't get focused if you 650 00:33:09,640 --> 00:33:14,480 Speaker 1: think it's an individual sport. Focus has never been a 651 00:33:14,560 --> 00:33:17,920 Speaker 1: one man game, like it only occurs in the context 652 00:33:18,600 --> 00:33:21,800 Speaker 1: like the fundamentals of attention is that it's largely what 653 00:33:21,840 --> 00:33:24,240 Speaker 1: we pay attention to is what other people tell us matters, 654 00:33:24,280 --> 00:33:26,800 Speaker 1: like that's how it works. And so simple way to 655 00:33:26,840 --> 00:33:29,560 Speaker 1: do this is, I know not everyone's in a position 656 00:33:29,600 --> 00:33:31,600 Speaker 1: where they feel like they can do this if they 657 00:33:31,680 --> 00:33:33,720 Speaker 1: have a boss. Look, there's some people you don't have 658 00:33:33,800 --> 00:33:36,320 Speaker 1: control over, but the truth is if you don't have 659 00:33:36,360 --> 00:33:41,520 Speaker 1: control over them, then they're they're responsible for your effective 660 00:33:41,600 --> 00:33:43,440 Speaker 1: use of attention and they don't want you to waste 661 00:33:43,480 --> 00:33:46,720 Speaker 1: it either. And so we we recommend just really simple. 662 00:33:47,240 --> 00:33:49,880 Speaker 1: Once a year, have a meeting with the people you love, 663 00:33:49,920 --> 00:33:51,600 Speaker 1: like I we do a family and then we do 664 00:33:51,640 --> 00:33:55,640 Speaker 1: a team meeting. And because that's majority of interruptions happened 665 00:33:55,640 --> 00:33:57,920 Speaker 1: from the same people, everyone talks about the random other 666 00:33:58,080 --> 00:34:00,800 Speaker 1: my client, come on, it's it's you, resually the same people, 667 00:34:01,200 --> 00:34:03,640 Speaker 1: and we just sit down. We have some basic questions like, hey, 668 00:34:03,640 --> 00:34:06,320 Speaker 1: what are the expectations of response time? Here's a good one, 669 00:34:06,400 --> 00:34:10,200 Speaker 1: a really good one. What channel are we using when 670 00:34:10,200 --> 00:34:13,480 Speaker 1: we have an emergency? And and why that matters is 671 00:34:13,480 --> 00:34:15,960 Speaker 1: because now if I know, like in our with our team, 672 00:34:16,480 --> 00:34:20,759 Speaker 1: phone calls are the only emergency, and so base Camp 673 00:34:20,800 --> 00:34:24,000 Speaker 1: wease that our email, um none of those things. I 674 00:34:24,080 --> 00:34:27,680 Speaker 1: never have to worry that like I'm missing an emergency 675 00:34:27,880 --> 00:34:30,560 Speaker 1: and I have to check it because I know if 676 00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:33,880 Speaker 1: it's a real emergency, then my my risk is going 677 00:34:33,920 --> 00:34:37,360 Speaker 1: to vibrate because I use I have an Apple Watch 678 00:34:37,880 --> 00:34:40,920 Speaker 1: and everything else is okay. Yeah, I think that's so important, right, 679 00:34:40,920 --> 00:34:43,680 Speaker 1: Like you're essentially creating rules as to how it is 680 00:34:43,719 --> 00:34:45,600 Speaker 1: that you all are going to communicate with each other. 681 00:34:45,640 --> 00:34:47,920 Speaker 1: I only allow Matt to communicate to me be a 682 00:34:47,960 --> 00:34:50,279 Speaker 1: smoke signal. That's during the day. If he wants to 683 00:34:50,280 --> 00:34:51,759 Speaker 1: get my attention, that's how he's got to do it. Well, 684 00:34:51,800 --> 00:34:54,560 Speaker 1: originally it was my Space. Uh, that's just back and forth, 685 00:34:54,600 --> 00:34:57,960 Speaker 1: but we've we've evolved to the more hipster smokes. I 686 00:34:58,000 --> 00:35:01,000 Speaker 1: think that the developers stopped updating my Bay so it 687 00:35:01,000 --> 00:35:03,840 Speaker 1: became unusable. Kurt, So you have a you have a 688 00:35:03,880 --> 00:35:05,920 Speaker 1: family at home, right Joe and I we we've got 689 00:35:06,000 --> 00:35:08,400 Speaker 1: kids as well. You know, especially for for folks like us, 690 00:35:08,440 --> 00:35:12,319 Speaker 1: finding like a work life balance is tough. So we're 691 00:35:12,360 --> 00:35:14,560 Speaker 1: excited to hear your thoughts on that as well as 692 00:35:14,680 --> 00:35:17,280 Speaker 1: hearing some simple steps that we can take to stay focused. 693 00:35:17,600 --> 00:35:29,120 Speaker 1: We're gonna get to those right after the break. Alright, well, 694 00:35:29,160 --> 00:35:31,359 Speaker 1: back from the break, we're talking with Kurt stein Horse. 695 00:35:31,400 --> 00:35:35,000 Speaker 1: We're talking about focus and Kurt, we've been discussing how 696 00:35:35,000 --> 00:35:38,799 Speaker 1: distractions can decrease our productivity at work, but let's talk 697 00:35:38,840 --> 00:35:41,839 Speaker 1: a little bit more about how our personal relationships, well, 698 00:35:41,880 --> 00:35:45,319 Speaker 1: they can suffer too, right, And and this concept of 699 00:35:45,360 --> 00:35:48,640 Speaker 1: work life balance has been talked about a lot from 700 00:35:48,719 --> 00:35:52,200 Speaker 1: a lot of different angles. But do you think that 701 00:35:52,320 --> 00:35:55,319 Speaker 1: work life balance is achievable or should we kind of 702 00:35:55,360 --> 00:35:58,719 Speaker 1: be actually framing it differently in order to understand and 703 00:35:58,760 --> 00:36:01,359 Speaker 1: aim for that better. Yeah, the chapter in my book 704 00:36:01,360 --> 00:36:03,080 Speaker 1: on this is called the Balance Myth, So I certainly 705 00:36:03,120 --> 00:36:05,320 Speaker 1: have an opinion on it. I think it's important to 706 00:36:05,360 --> 00:36:08,000 Speaker 1: realize the context for how long we've been attempting this, 707 00:36:08,000 --> 00:36:10,960 Speaker 1: this notion of work life balance. About a hundred years 708 00:36:10,960 --> 00:36:14,239 Speaker 1: ago was the first time that, with the rise of 709 00:36:14,280 --> 00:36:16,560 Speaker 1: the car, that the people we live with for different 710 00:36:16,560 --> 00:36:18,239 Speaker 1: than the people we worked with. And that's when this 711 00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:20,719 Speaker 1: idea of like balancing these two communities had to come 712 00:36:20,719 --> 00:36:24,440 Speaker 1: into play. And and so what happens now is as 713 00:36:24,520 --> 00:36:27,680 Speaker 1: we continue to do that, like hard divisions are no divisions, 714 00:36:27,760 --> 00:36:30,759 Speaker 1: and and in every one of these cases there's a 715 00:36:30,800 --> 00:36:34,919 Speaker 1: failure to recognize what what people actually need and what's 716 00:36:34,920 --> 00:36:37,799 Speaker 1: realistic and what the benefits of technology are, And one 717 00:36:37,800 --> 00:36:39,160 Speaker 1: of the best things I can do is I can 718 00:36:39,239 --> 00:36:42,800 Speaker 1: leave work earlier and and get home to my family 719 00:36:43,200 --> 00:36:46,320 Speaker 1: because I can send an email while I'm home. That's amazing. 720 00:36:47,000 --> 00:36:50,120 Speaker 1: On the other hand, if I'm not careful, I can 721 00:36:50,400 --> 00:36:54,160 Speaker 1: rush home at eighty miles while texting on the way 722 00:36:54,200 --> 00:36:57,279 Speaker 1: home to get home to kids who love me, who 723 00:36:57,320 --> 00:37:00,000 Speaker 1: three minutes and I'm ignoring because someone needs something somewhere. 724 00:37:01,239 --> 00:37:03,680 Speaker 1: And the better way to approach this on a high 725 00:37:03,760 --> 00:37:06,480 Speaker 1: level we call it work life integration. Um. Different people 726 00:37:06,560 --> 00:37:10,280 Speaker 1: have different needs when it comes to work life quote unquote. 727 00:37:10,280 --> 00:37:15,000 Speaker 1: Balance the notion that you work too much, you're a workaholic, 728 00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:19,040 Speaker 1: you need to stop working and watch a Netflix show 729 00:37:19,239 --> 00:37:22,279 Speaker 1: in the evening, like as if that has value. Right. 730 00:37:23,560 --> 00:37:26,200 Speaker 1: So the key here is to say, if it's a 731 00:37:26,320 --> 00:37:30,640 Speaker 1: community of people that deeply matters to me, do I 732 00:37:30,800 --> 00:37:34,440 Speaker 1: have a place and time where they get all of me? 733 00:37:35,160 --> 00:37:38,360 Speaker 1: That's the question. And so there's a lot of in 734 00:37:38,400 --> 00:37:41,879 Speaker 1: between spaces. But for instance, with my family, from when 735 00:37:41,880 --> 00:37:43,319 Speaker 1: I walk in the door and by the way, the 736 00:37:43,360 --> 00:37:44,920 Speaker 1: only way I can walk in the door and be 737 00:37:45,000 --> 00:37:48,640 Speaker 1: fully present is by my kids not running out when 738 00:37:49,080 --> 00:37:52,040 Speaker 1: they hear the garage door and me opening my phone 739 00:37:52,160 --> 00:37:55,000 Speaker 1: and looking just to see if there's any emails, and 740 00:37:55,080 --> 00:37:58,480 Speaker 1: look at my to do list and check everything and 741 00:37:58,480 --> 00:38:01,920 Speaker 1: and make sure there's nothing I haven't accounted for. And 742 00:38:01,960 --> 00:38:04,719 Speaker 1: after I do that, I say, nothing needs my attensition now, 743 00:38:05,480 --> 00:38:07,640 Speaker 1: and I go in the house and from the time 744 00:38:07,680 --> 00:38:09,560 Speaker 1: I'm there until the time the kids go to bed, 745 00:38:09,560 --> 00:38:10,960 Speaker 1: and then my wife and I do kind of a 746 00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:15,160 Speaker 1: debrief evening thing. That period is sacred and it's not 747 00:38:15,200 --> 00:38:18,080 Speaker 1: that long, and it makes the entire experience. And then 748 00:38:18,239 --> 00:38:20,719 Speaker 1: the phone Actually it's not next to me, because if 749 00:38:20,760 --> 00:38:22,759 Speaker 1: it was next to me, I would accidentally look at 750 00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:26,040 Speaker 1: it and and during that period, but then what happens 751 00:38:26,120 --> 00:38:28,680 Speaker 1: is I then go pick up my computer and I 752 00:38:28,680 --> 00:38:31,120 Speaker 1: start working because I actually would love to get rid 753 00:38:31,160 --> 00:38:32,759 Speaker 1: of the stuff that makes it possible for me to 754 00:38:32,800 --> 00:38:35,279 Speaker 1: have a great day the next day rather than starting overwhelmed. 755 00:38:35,640 --> 00:38:38,360 Speaker 1: Uh not, that's the perfect thing for everyone. But the 756 00:38:38,440 --> 00:38:41,759 Speaker 1: key is, um, do you do you know? And and 757 00:38:41,800 --> 00:38:44,799 Speaker 1: are you aware? And are the those people aware of 758 00:38:44,840 --> 00:38:47,360 Speaker 1: when you're not available to them and not available to 759 00:38:47,360 --> 00:38:49,480 Speaker 1: the world, so you can be fully available to to 760 00:38:49,719 --> 00:38:53,080 Speaker 1: the particular people that are with you. Because at the 761 00:38:53,120 --> 00:38:55,760 Speaker 1: end of the day, UM, we're social, right, We're wired 762 00:38:55,800 --> 00:38:58,640 Speaker 1: to want to deeply connect. And here's the deal. The 763 00:38:58,680 --> 00:39:00,120 Speaker 1: worst thing that we can do is feel guilty all 764 00:39:00,120 --> 00:39:02,759 Speaker 1: the time that we're where we are because we're either 765 00:39:02,840 --> 00:39:05,719 Speaker 1: on or devised or not. Like, maybe a simple way 766 00:39:05,320 --> 00:39:08,759 Speaker 1: to fix this is just to communicate what you're doing 767 00:39:08,760 --> 00:39:11,600 Speaker 1: on that device. And people are far less offended when 768 00:39:11,680 --> 00:39:13,839 Speaker 1: they feel like that, like, hey, I just I'm checking 769 00:39:13,840 --> 00:39:15,640 Speaker 1: to see where we're gonna eat, or hey, just gotta 770 00:39:15,680 --> 00:39:18,080 Speaker 1: call or got a text from this first, I gotta respond, 771 00:39:18,120 --> 00:39:21,000 Speaker 1: So like it solves a lot of problems because we 772 00:39:21,120 --> 00:39:23,560 Speaker 1: all live complicated lives, Like sometimes work has to happen 773 00:39:23,560 --> 00:39:25,719 Speaker 1: when I'm at home, right, but as long as the 774 00:39:25,760 --> 00:39:27,880 Speaker 1: people that are around me don't feel like I'm leaving 775 00:39:27,920 --> 00:39:31,120 Speaker 1: them for no reason, we're usually a pretty good place. 776 00:39:31,480 --> 00:39:33,200 Speaker 1: Or maybe sometimes you just gotta say I'm picking up 777 00:39:33,239 --> 00:39:38,319 Speaker 1: that backup, running back off the waiver wire. Okay, it's 778 00:39:38,320 --> 00:39:42,520 Speaker 1: not gonna last. They're the current, Like in regards to 779 00:39:42,560 --> 00:39:44,640 Speaker 1: like that work life balance, I know for me, like 780 00:39:44,680 --> 00:39:46,720 Speaker 1: it's easy for me to kind of romain a size 781 00:39:47,080 --> 00:39:50,399 Speaker 1: and strive after like this idealistic nine to five job 782 00:39:50,440 --> 00:39:52,359 Speaker 1: where I can completely turn off my like my work 783 00:39:52,360 --> 00:39:55,279 Speaker 1: brain right once the whistle blows sort of thing. But 784 00:39:55,400 --> 00:39:57,520 Speaker 1: like that's just not the world we live in today, right, 785 00:39:57,560 --> 00:39:59,719 Speaker 1: Like so much of our personal life does creep into 786 00:39:59,719 --> 00:40:03,359 Speaker 1: our and vice versa. Right, Like there are times when 787 00:40:03,480 --> 00:40:06,440 Speaker 1: we have to tend to some work related tasks after hours. 788 00:40:06,960 --> 00:40:08,759 Speaker 1: And so what I hear you saying at least is that, 789 00:40:08,840 --> 00:40:11,440 Speaker 1: like just that work life balance is not it's not 790 00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:15,000 Speaker 1: clear cut, like it's not either black or white. It's 791 00:40:15,000 --> 00:40:16,920 Speaker 1: a lot more fluid if we want to take advantage 792 00:40:17,040 --> 00:40:20,759 Speaker 1: of the conveniences that technology offers us. Right, that's right, 793 00:40:20,840 --> 00:40:24,439 Speaker 1: And let's go a step further here, Uh, people aren't 794 00:40:24,440 --> 00:40:28,360 Speaker 1: working more now, Like go, we do a decent amount 795 00:40:28,360 --> 00:40:30,800 Speaker 1: of work in agriculture, like go live on a farm, 796 00:40:31,280 --> 00:40:34,480 Speaker 1: and live on a farm, and like, oh gosh, they 797 00:40:34,520 --> 00:40:37,560 Speaker 1: needed more work life balance. Like, look, the reason that 798 00:40:37,600 --> 00:40:40,360 Speaker 1: the TV, literally the reason the TV became so popular 799 00:40:40,440 --> 00:40:42,399 Speaker 1: years ago, is because we started having so much free time. 800 00:40:43,160 --> 00:40:46,840 Speaker 1: So like we're not overworked. And in fact, let's go 801 00:40:47,239 --> 00:40:50,440 Speaker 1: like even into the research and understand that, do you know, 802 00:40:50,520 --> 00:40:53,480 Speaker 1: people are happier. The happiest we are is that when 803 00:40:53,520 --> 00:40:56,400 Speaker 1: we are in a state of flow. Fascinating sitting the 804 00:40:56,440 --> 00:40:59,680 Speaker 1: early nineties, like meaning that we are fully focused, everything disappears, 805 00:40:59,719 --> 00:41:03,480 Speaker 1: time disappears. We're happier there than we are when we're 806 00:41:03,560 --> 00:41:06,560 Speaker 1: in leisure mode. And yet we feel like there's this 807 00:41:06,600 --> 00:41:08,560 Speaker 1: model where we have to have more leisure mode. We 808 00:41:08,600 --> 00:41:11,439 Speaker 1: need more rests, but we don't need more leisure. It's 809 00:41:11,480 --> 00:41:15,359 Speaker 1: it's perfectly reasonable to say, like discipline and push and 810 00:41:15,440 --> 00:41:18,560 Speaker 1: work like that. If you don't, someone else will. Well. 811 00:41:18,560 --> 00:41:21,880 Speaker 1: It makes me think. There's this recent recent article I 812 00:41:21,920 --> 00:41:24,880 Speaker 1: read about a German company that's taking everybody in their 813 00:41:24,880 --> 00:41:28,000 Speaker 1: workforce down to a five hour work day, so every week, 814 00:41:28,040 --> 00:41:31,960 Speaker 1: everybody's working twenty five hours a week. But what happens 815 00:41:32,640 --> 00:41:36,640 Speaker 1: is that there's no social media there, there's no cell phones. 816 00:41:36,719 --> 00:41:39,359 Speaker 1: They're they're they're basically the office is trying to cater 817 00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:42,759 Speaker 1: everything towards an ability to help their employees focus and 818 00:41:42,800 --> 00:41:46,279 Speaker 1: to avoid the distractions during the work day. And a 819 00:41:46,360 --> 00:41:48,120 Speaker 1: lot of these there are a couple other examples of 820 00:41:48,120 --> 00:41:49,600 Speaker 1: companies that have done this. I believe there's like a 821 00:41:50,120 --> 00:41:52,520 Speaker 1: surfing company out in California. Maybe they did something similar. 822 00:41:52,680 --> 00:41:55,640 Speaker 1: And every time Patagonia did that, yeah, I got like 823 00:41:55,640 --> 00:41:58,359 Speaker 1: surfing breaks. Yeah, and and every time a company does 824 00:41:58,400 --> 00:42:01,000 Speaker 1: something like this, it turns out that the productivity doesn't 825 00:42:01,000 --> 00:42:02,920 Speaker 1: go down as long as at the same time, as 826 00:42:02,920 --> 00:42:05,400 Speaker 1: you lower the amount of hours that the employees are 827 00:42:05,440 --> 00:42:09,440 Speaker 1: supposed to work, you're eliminating the distractions and enhancing the 828 00:42:09,480 --> 00:42:11,680 Speaker 1: ability to focus. At the same time, it turns out 829 00:42:11,440 --> 00:42:16,280 Speaker 1: productivity often actually goes up. Yeah, that's right. Always available 830 00:42:16,360 --> 00:42:19,759 Speaker 1: means never fully available. And and this is the like 831 00:42:20,000 --> 00:42:24,319 Speaker 1: the incalculable, Like we can't measure the cost. What we 832 00:42:24,360 --> 00:42:27,439 Speaker 1: can measure is that we haven't seen any productivity gains 833 00:42:27,440 --> 00:42:30,040 Speaker 1: in the economy despite having all this incredible technology since 834 00:42:30,040 --> 00:42:33,040 Speaker 1: two thousand seven. And so there's no productivity gains because 835 00:42:33,400 --> 00:42:36,759 Speaker 1: it turns out like always being available means always being interrupted, 836 00:42:36,920 --> 00:42:40,240 Speaker 1: means never getting focused work done. And you can work 837 00:42:40,760 --> 00:42:45,520 Speaker 1: very few hours and and and accomplish significantly more than 838 00:42:45,560 --> 00:42:47,880 Speaker 1: most people, um, if you really give your all in 839 00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:50,400 Speaker 1: those hours. Let's kind of talk now, where like the 840 00:42:50,600 --> 00:42:53,000 Speaker 1: rubber meets the road, right, do you have any practical 841 00:42:53,000 --> 00:42:56,360 Speaker 1: tips that our listeners could implement today in order to 842 00:42:56,400 --> 00:42:59,279 Speaker 1: be less distracted, Say, like, while they're at work, what 843 00:42:59,320 --> 00:43:01,960 Speaker 1: things can they do to allow them to focus more 844 00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:05,040 Speaker 1: and to be distracted less, like some sort of zapping 845 00:43:05,040 --> 00:43:08,680 Speaker 1: device that if they do stray right, get their attention back. 846 00:43:09,360 --> 00:43:13,759 Speaker 1: Pain is generally a great good motivator. Yeah, um, yeah, 847 00:43:13,760 --> 00:43:15,680 Speaker 1: I can give you. I'll give you several Let's just 848 00:43:15,719 --> 00:43:18,120 Speaker 1: start at the beginning of the day. Every decision you 849 00:43:18,120 --> 00:43:19,840 Speaker 1: have to make makes the next one a little bit harder. 850 00:43:20,200 --> 00:43:22,200 Speaker 1: So if you start in the middle of the day, 851 00:43:22,239 --> 00:43:23,719 Speaker 1: or start at the beginning of the day, by the 852 00:43:23,800 --> 00:43:26,320 Speaker 1: night before, having had a bunch of the early decisions 853 00:43:26,360 --> 00:43:30,040 Speaker 1: laid out for you, you'll have more capacity than you 854 00:43:30,400 --> 00:43:34,160 Speaker 1: really would otherwise. This is why you know, um, President 855 00:43:34,200 --> 00:43:36,360 Speaker 1: Obama wore the same thing every day, right, you had 856 00:43:36,400 --> 00:43:38,840 Speaker 1: a very small selection. Why Warren Buffett eats a burger 857 00:43:38,840 --> 00:43:41,880 Speaker 1: every day. Like the great thinkers who focus have the 858 00:43:41,920 --> 00:43:44,800 Speaker 1: ability to like eliminate lots of the small decisions, especially 859 00:43:44,840 --> 00:43:47,560 Speaker 1: on the front, so that's an easy one. Also, get 860 00:43:48,040 --> 00:43:50,680 Speaker 1: sleep is significant the system of the part of your 861 00:43:50,719 --> 00:43:54,160 Speaker 1: brain that actually allows for focus and overcoming interruption. It 862 00:43:54,200 --> 00:43:57,839 Speaker 1: takes far more energy resources, So the more tired you are, 863 00:43:57,880 --> 00:43:59,320 Speaker 1: the less you're gonna be able to do. This is 864 00:43:59,360 --> 00:44:02,439 Speaker 1: why at the end the night you find yourself again 865 00:44:02,480 --> 00:44:05,680 Speaker 1: looping through social media and going to new things and 866 00:44:05,680 --> 00:44:06,960 Speaker 1: like I should go to bed, but I'm going to 867 00:44:07,080 --> 00:44:08,879 Speaker 1: keep seeing what else is out there. It's because that's 868 00:44:09,239 --> 00:44:11,960 Speaker 1: more tired you are. That's the system of attention that's curious, 869 00:44:12,239 --> 00:44:15,440 Speaker 1: find new things, thing far. So, Um, that's would be 870 00:44:15,520 --> 00:44:20,080 Speaker 1: number two. Number three, start your day on your way 871 00:44:20,080 --> 00:44:23,799 Speaker 1: into work by visualizing. And I know this sounds so 872 00:44:23,920 --> 00:44:26,239 Speaker 1: cheesy even as I say it, but um, take a 873 00:44:26,239 --> 00:44:28,640 Speaker 1: couple of minutes to say, what is this great day 874 00:44:28,640 --> 00:44:31,320 Speaker 1: going to look like? Literally visualizing this is how the 875 00:44:31,360 --> 00:44:33,920 Speaker 1: day is going to go. Uh. And what that does 876 00:44:34,000 --> 00:44:38,279 Speaker 1: is it primes our brain. Two when we start to 877 00:44:38,320 --> 00:44:42,200 Speaker 1: get off it, we unconsciously move towards it back towards it. 878 00:44:42,239 --> 00:44:44,040 Speaker 1: So it's not even any active work. You don't have 879 00:44:44,080 --> 00:44:46,200 Speaker 1: to then like double stress about it. But by setting 880 00:44:46,239 --> 00:44:50,080 Speaker 1: an intention, it actually will help support that intention, and 881 00:44:50,160 --> 00:44:54,120 Speaker 1: it will allow you to more quickly identify when something 882 00:44:54,200 --> 00:44:56,560 Speaker 1: is distracting you and getting you away from that intention. 883 00:44:57,719 --> 00:44:59,719 Speaker 1: So that's the stuff I would do on the front 884 00:44:59,760 --> 00:45:01,640 Speaker 1: of the day. And then then you know, jumping into 885 00:45:01,640 --> 00:45:04,840 Speaker 1: the next one is don't let your inbox be your homescreen. 886 00:45:04,880 --> 00:45:07,719 Speaker 1: Don't let your inbox be your task list, Get out 887 00:45:07,760 --> 00:45:10,080 Speaker 1: of your inbox as much as possible, so like you 888 00:45:10,120 --> 00:45:11,560 Speaker 1: can do it. You can look at the bed of 889 00:45:11,560 --> 00:45:12,880 Speaker 1: the day. You can say, okay, I have all these 890 00:45:12,880 --> 00:45:15,799 Speaker 1: emails to do. Okay, well take them and move them 891 00:45:15,840 --> 00:45:18,719 Speaker 1: into wherever. I mean, you can use a sauna or 892 00:45:19,120 --> 00:45:22,720 Speaker 1: to doist or there's any whatever programming there. There's plenty 893 00:45:22,719 --> 00:45:25,760 Speaker 1: of ways to do this and and and actually write 894 00:45:25,760 --> 00:45:28,560 Speaker 1: those messages not in the inbox, but write them in 895 00:45:28,719 --> 00:45:31,680 Speaker 1: another system. That means that you're not because the problem 896 00:45:31,680 --> 00:45:34,399 Speaker 1: with an inbox is it's the cess pool of all 897 00:45:34,440 --> 00:45:37,960 Speaker 1: these divergent and unrelated ideas. Like I go back to it, 898 00:45:37,960 --> 00:45:39,239 Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, I need to do this that's not 899 00:45:39,280 --> 00:45:40,600 Speaker 1: related to oh and I need to do that, and 900 00:45:40,600 --> 00:45:42,080 Speaker 1: I need to do this, and then we live in 901 00:45:42,120 --> 00:45:44,640 Speaker 1: it and we don't understand where we can't complete it. 902 00:45:44,719 --> 00:45:47,560 Speaker 1: So if we move out of the inbox, move it 903 00:45:47,600 --> 00:45:50,839 Speaker 1: into it to do list, prioritize that list by importance. 904 00:45:51,040 --> 00:45:53,879 Speaker 1: I have a few categories like these are the two 905 00:45:53,960 --> 00:45:55,960 Speaker 1: or the four things today that will define whether I 906 00:45:56,000 --> 00:45:58,040 Speaker 1: make it, where why I'm successful. Then I have a 907 00:45:58,120 --> 00:46:00,000 Speaker 1: laundry list of things that I just needed to get done. 908 00:46:00,000 --> 00:46:02,600 Speaker 1: And when I'm I mean quick wins, and then I 909 00:46:02,640 --> 00:46:05,120 Speaker 1: have things that if I get to them, it's a bonus. 910 00:46:05,960 --> 00:46:08,880 Speaker 1: These are really simple ways to to set yourself up 911 00:46:08,920 --> 00:46:12,200 Speaker 1: for success and to give yourself a chance to be 912 00:46:12,280 --> 00:46:15,040 Speaker 1: successful on the back end, Kurt, I got one more 913 00:46:15,120 --> 00:46:17,560 Speaker 1: question for you. When obviously this the show, we we 914 00:46:17,680 --> 00:46:19,880 Speaker 1: mostly usually talk about money, like how to get your 915 00:46:19,920 --> 00:46:21,880 Speaker 1: money game together, how to pay off that, how to 916 00:46:21,920 --> 00:46:24,680 Speaker 1: save for retirement, like how to stay focused there, and 917 00:46:24,760 --> 00:46:28,240 Speaker 1: some of these goals are really really long term. Saving 918 00:46:28,239 --> 00:46:31,200 Speaker 1: for retirement takes decades, and paying off debt if you've 919 00:46:31,200 --> 00:46:33,320 Speaker 1: gotten into a lot of it can take a handful 920 00:46:33,320 --> 00:46:36,040 Speaker 1: of years, can take a decade sometimes if it's that much, 921 00:46:36,080 --> 00:46:38,200 Speaker 1: if it's a bunch of student loans and a bunch 922 00:46:38,239 --> 00:46:40,640 Speaker 1: of credit cards debt that you've racked up. So so, like, 923 00:46:40,719 --> 00:46:42,839 Speaker 1: what advice would you give to someone trying to stay 924 00:46:42,880 --> 00:46:47,000 Speaker 1: focused over the long haul with a continued drive to 925 00:46:47,160 --> 00:46:49,160 Speaker 1: be a good saver or to be great at paying 926 00:46:49,160 --> 00:46:52,680 Speaker 1: down debt. Do you have any advice for folks like that? Yeah? 927 00:46:52,760 --> 00:46:58,480 Speaker 1: I think attention is given to what matters, and what 928 00:46:58,560 --> 00:47:02,520 Speaker 1: that means is why do we feel quote unquote distracted 929 00:47:02,560 --> 00:47:06,600 Speaker 1: because we were so inundated by all these messages all 930 00:47:06,640 --> 00:47:10,239 Speaker 1: the time that we we we lose the ability to 931 00:47:10,320 --> 00:47:16,000 Speaker 1: assess um what really matters, and so we become rudderless. 932 00:47:16,000 --> 00:47:19,320 Speaker 1: Were a raft in an ocean of distraction being pushed 933 00:47:19,360 --> 00:47:22,359 Speaker 1: about left and right, and and so I think when 934 00:47:22,440 --> 00:47:25,560 Speaker 1: we think about anything that involves a long term focus 935 00:47:25,600 --> 00:47:29,400 Speaker 1: of requirement, it's how do we ensure that we are 936 00:47:29,400 --> 00:47:33,000 Speaker 1: having it brought to our attention in consistent ways, that 937 00:47:33,120 --> 00:47:34,920 Speaker 1: this is what actually is worth our attention, this is 938 00:47:35,000 --> 00:47:38,319 Speaker 1: what matters. Meaning um put it really really simply is 939 00:47:38,360 --> 00:47:41,920 Speaker 1: like if you want to reduce that, you should you 940 00:47:42,160 --> 00:47:44,080 Speaker 1: This is why you should be listening to this podcast, 941 00:47:44,120 --> 00:47:48,439 Speaker 1: because you have to constantly put that information in front 942 00:47:48,480 --> 00:47:50,480 Speaker 1: of you and it has to come to the expense 943 00:47:50,520 --> 00:47:53,120 Speaker 1: of other information. So, like what I would say is, 944 00:47:53,600 --> 00:47:56,640 Speaker 1: what if whatever my biggest goals are, how am I 945 00:47:56,680 --> 00:47:59,839 Speaker 1: digesting information that is reminding me of that on an 946 00:48:00,000 --> 00:48:03,560 Speaker 1: extent basis. So, whatever your faith is, we can all 947 00:48:03,600 --> 00:48:08,120 Speaker 1: agree that the historic Old Testament has implications across every 948 00:48:08,120 --> 00:48:10,759 Speaker 1: major religion. And there's this concept called the Chama and 949 00:48:10,800 --> 00:48:13,919 Speaker 1: Deuteronomy and it and it's it basically says, the first 950 00:48:13,920 --> 00:48:15,640 Speaker 1: thing that you do in the morning is is say 951 00:48:15,719 --> 00:48:19,680 Speaker 1: the Chama like um, the hero Israel, the lords of God, right, 952 00:48:19,680 --> 00:48:21,200 Speaker 1: And I'm not saying that that should be yours, but 953 00:48:21,239 --> 00:48:23,360 Speaker 1: it's the first thing that someone that is a faith 954 00:48:23,480 --> 00:48:25,320 Speaker 1: should say. Is the last thing they should say is 955 00:48:25,320 --> 00:48:29,359 Speaker 1: should be painted on theirs their door frames. And what 956 00:48:29,400 --> 00:48:33,759 Speaker 1: this is pointing to is we forget and so we 957 00:48:33,800 --> 00:48:40,279 Speaker 1: need ritual and consistent reminders at every major place, key 958 00:48:40,320 --> 00:48:43,040 Speaker 1: moments in our days and and so if you want 959 00:48:43,040 --> 00:48:45,319 Speaker 1: to do it, find ways to be reminded of it. 960 00:48:45,719 --> 00:48:48,200 Speaker 1: And in long term, that's where you're gonna go. Yeah, 961 00:48:48,200 --> 00:48:51,279 Speaker 1: that's so true. Just constantly constantly reminding ourselves of that, 962 00:48:51,640 --> 00:48:53,759 Speaker 1: constantly listening to how the money is what Kurt really 963 00:48:53,800 --> 00:48:57,040 Speaker 1: said there, so exactly great advice, Kurtt. This has been 964 00:48:57,239 --> 00:48:59,719 Speaker 1: an awesome conversation. I think just the things that we've 965 00:48:59,760 --> 00:49:02,719 Speaker 1: talked about in this episode, it's going to have an 966 00:49:02,760 --> 00:49:05,400 Speaker 1: impact on folks when it comes to them just excelling 967 00:49:05,400 --> 00:49:08,279 Speaker 1: and doing just a killer job at work. Not only there, 968 00:49:08,280 --> 00:49:10,880 Speaker 1: but I just see it having an impact on people's 969 00:49:10,880 --> 00:49:13,640 Speaker 1: personal lives, right, like more present in the relationships just 970 00:49:13,640 --> 00:49:16,040 Speaker 1: just whether it be just with your friendships or with 971 00:49:16,160 --> 00:49:18,960 Speaker 1: your significant other, your kids, whatever it is man. So 972 00:49:19,000 --> 00:49:21,560 Speaker 1: all that note, we really appreciate you you joining us 973 00:49:21,960 --> 00:49:24,880 Speaker 1: for this episode. If folks want to find more information 974 00:49:24,920 --> 00:49:27,880 Speaker 1: about you, where can they go? So a few places 975 00:49:27,880 --> 00:49:30,080 Speaker 1: that you can reach me. Um, first off, if you 976 00:49:30,120 --> 00:49:33,799 Speaker 1: just want information, then the two things the book is 977 00:49:33,960 --> 00:49:36,680 Speaker 1: meant to be. It was written for people that can't 978 00:49:36,719 --> 00:49:39,879 Speaker 1: read books, and it's also available in audio, and it's 979 00:49:40,160 --> 00:49:44,359 Speaker 1: really tactical, short quick solutions on how we can get 980 00:49:44,360 --> 00:49:47,160 Speaker 1: on top of these issues. But we do a few things. 981 00:49:47,440 --> 00:49:50,319 Speaker 1: Email is a really great resource for me. So I'm 982 00:49:50,360 --> 00:49:51,759 Speaker 1: gonna give you my email, and I'm also going to 983 00:49:51,800 --> 00:49:54,600 Speaker 1: be really honest with you that So my email is 984 00:49:54,719 --> 00:49:59,520 Speaker 1: c s at focus wise dot com. Now there's someone 985 00:49:59,560 --> 00:50:03,759 Speaker 1: who check it's that email to provide basic information. If 986 00:50:03,760 --> 00:50:06,440 Speaker 1: you want something that we have a form for, do 987 00:50:06,520 --> 00:50:09,120 Speaker 1: you get it. But here's my promise, if there's a question, 988 00:50:09,800 --> 00:50:12,879 Speaker 1: if there's something that's more personal, it will always get 989 00:50:12,880 --> 00:50:15,719 Speaker 1: to me. I always respond. So nice. It's nice to 990 00:50:15,800 --> 00:50:19,080 Speaker 1: have filters so that the mass doesn't get to us, 991 00:50:19,120 --> 00:50:21,440 Speaker 1: so that the things that do matter actually those how 992 00:50:21,440 --> 00:50:25,879 Speaker 1: the money listeners are gonna blow up your inbox? Awesome? Well, Kurt, 993 00:50:25,960 --> 00:50:27,840 Speaker 1: this has seriously been a great conversation. Thank you so 994 00:50:27,920 --> 00:50:30,839 Speaker 1: much for for your time and attention tonight. We appreciate it. Hey, 995 00:50:30,880 --> 00:50:32,919 Speaker 1: my pleasure. Guys. All right, man, that was a fun 996 00:50:32,960 --> 00:50:35,719 Speaker 1: conversation with Kurt. And by the way, congratulations you stayed 997 00:50:35,719 --> 00:50:37,960 Speaker 1: focused very well on that entire interview. It's proud of 998 00:50:37,960 --> 00:50:40,239 Speaker 1: you for that. Yeah, I stayed off my phone. Proud 999 00:50:40,239 --> 00:50:42,160 Speaker 1: of me. You weren't checking your Instagram. I appreciate that. 1000 00:50:42,440 --> 00:50:44,279 Speaker 1: But okay, I want to know for you, what was 1001 00:50:44,320 --> 00:50:46,799 Speaker 1: your big takeaway from that conversation. Well, I've got two 1002 00:50:46,800 --> 00:50:48,120 Speaker 1: of them, so you want to go ahead and say 1003 00:50:48,120 --> 00:50:49,239 Speaker 1: both of mine or do you want to go first? 1004 00:50:49,239 --> 00:50:51,239 Speaker 1: All right, big, big, big shot, let's do this. Come on, 1005 00:50:51,360 --> 00:50:53,000 Speaker 1: go first. Two of them. That that he mentioned that 1006 00:50:53,000 --> 00:50:54,839 Speaker 1: really stood out to me, And what he said was, 1007 00:50:54,920 --> 00:50:56,640 Speaker 1: and this is going to kind of sound weird, right, 1008 00:50:56,640 --> 00:50:58,920 Speaker 1: but he was saying that we should communicate about our 1009 00:50:58,920 --> 00:51:01,920 Speaker 1: communications it um and that really stuck out to me 1010 00:51:01,960 --> 00:51:04,040 Speaker 1: because that's not something I've ever done. It's not something 1011 00:51:04,080 --> 00:51:07,000 Speaker 1: I've ever talked with my wife about and how we 1012 00:51:07,040 --> 00:51:09,040 Speaker 1: should communicate while I'm working and you know, when she 1013 00:51:09,040 --> 00:51:10,879 Speaker 1: needs to get a hold of me. We we sort 1014 00:51:10,920 --> 00:51:13,480 Speaker 1: of know how we expect each other to respond in 1015 00:51:13,560 --> 00:51:16,200 Speaker 1: certain ways. There's an understanding, but we've never flat out 1016 00:51:16,400 --> 00:51:19,080 Speaker 1: sort of talked about it. And actually he said that 1017 00:51:19,280 --> 00:51:21,320 Speaker 1: maybe once a year you should sit down with you know, 1018 00:51:21,360 --> 00:51:23,000 Speaker 1: maybe your team or with your family, and you have 1019 00:51:23,080 --> 00:51:25,759 Speaker 1: these meetings where you discussed maybe essentially I guess what's 1020 00:51:25,800 --> 00:51:28,080 Speaker 1: working what's not working. And for you and me, buddy, 1021 00:51:28,160 --> 00:51:29,879 Speaker 1: like you and I, we worked together, and this isn't 1022 00:51:29,880 --> 00:51:33,160 Speaker 1: something we've ever talked about. We we communicate sometimes more 1023 00:51:33,239 --> 00:51:35,479 Speaker 1: or less, but at times I think it's maybe easy 1024 00:51:35,520 --> 00:51:37,800 Speaker 1: for us to get frustrated if one of us is 1025 00:51:37,840 --> 00:51:39,799 Speaker 1: in the zone, right, if one of us is is 1026 00:51:39,880 --> 00:51:42,080 Speaker 1: in is in flow, and we're we're really wanting to 1027 00:51:42,080 --> 00:51:43,920 Speaker 1: get work done, and we've got email turned off, we've 1028 00:51:43,920 --> 00:51:46,080 Speaker 1: got our phone on airplane mode. If we were to 1029 00:51:46,160 --> 00:51:49,279 Speaker 1: talk about how we're going to talk, I see that 1030 00:51:49,360 --> 00:51:51,520 Speaker 1: being being real helpful for for you and me specifically 1031 00:51:51,560 --> 00:51:53,239 Speaker 1: as well. Yeah, for sure, they gets to take away 1032 00:51:53,239 --> 00:51:55,520 Speaker 1: for us to be able to communicate better by talking 1033 00:51:55,520 --> 00:51:57,920 Speaker 1: about how we want to communicate totally. So before I 1034 00:51:57,960 --> 00:51:59,480 Speaker 1: say my second one, you go ahead and jump on 1035 00:51:59,560 --> 00:52:01,600 Speaker 1: yours in case to steal it. Alright, cool, So I 1036 00:52:01,640 --> 00:52:04,799 Speaker 1: think my big takeaway was less of thinking about work 1037 00:52:04,800 --> 00:52:06,759 Speaker 1: life balance and a little more thinking about that work 1038 00:52:06,800 --> 00:52:10,200 Speaker 1: life integration. And so something that Emily and I literally 1039 00:52:10,280 --> 00:52:12,920 Speaker 1: just instituted this past Sunday. It was kind of like 1040 00:52:13,040 --> 00:52:15,200 Speaker 1: a Sunday phone sabbath, and we we kind of heard 1041 00:52:15,239 --> 00:52:18,319 Speaker 1: this other places, but like literally taking Sunday's a good 1042 00:52:18,400 --> 00:52:20,439 Speaker 1: chunk of pretty much all day Sunday where the phone 1043 00:52:20,520 --> 00:52:22,200 Speaker 1: is not anywhere near us. And I think, you know, 1044 00:52:22,280 --> 00:52:24,640 Speaker 1: what Kurt said was kind of placement is key, and 1045 00:52:24,680 --> 00:52:26,440 Speaker 1: if his phone's next to him, he's going to check it. 1046 00:52:26,719 --> 00:52:29,319 Speaker 1: And so we've decided that, like a Sunday, Sundays are 1047 00:52:29,360 --> 00:52:31,080 Speaker 1: a great time for us to spend time as a family. 1048 00:52:31,360 --> 00:52:32,840 Speaker 1: And I don't know about you, but if my phone's 1049 00:52:32,840 --> 00:52:34,920 Speaker 1: in my pocket, I'm just so much more tempted to 1050 00:52:35,000 --> 00:52:37,760 Speaker 1: check it. And so I think when we're talking about 1051 00:52:37,760 --> 00:52:41,120 Speaker 1: that balance, achieving that sort of balance or integration, you 1052 00:52:41,120 --> 00:52:43,160 Speaker 1: know what, I can still check my phone that night 1053 00:52:43,360 --> 00:52:45,040 Speaker 1: after I put the kids to bed or something like that, 1054 00:52:45,200 --> 00:52:46,759 Speaker 1: but if we have that full day that we get 1055 00:52:46,760 --> 00:52:48,959 Speaker 1: to spend together where I haven't checked my phone once, 1056 00:52:49,280 --> 00:52:50,799 Speaker 1: but if I do check it and I see an 1057 00:52:50,840 --> 00:52:52,640 Speaker 1: email or a text, pops up that I feel like 1058 00:52:52,640 --> 00:52:54,680 Speaker 1: I have to respond to or whatever. It just kind 1059 00:52:54,680 --> 00:52:56,759 Speaker 1: of it changes the flow of the day with my 1060 00:52:56,800 --> 00:52:59,040 Speaker 1: fam and so for us, that's something that we're choosing 1061 00:52:59,080 --> 00:53:01,480 Speaker 1: to do that to to keep my focus too, to 1062 00:53:01,560 --> 00:53:03,920 Speaker 1: keep our focus together. And so yeah, I thought that 1063 00:53:03,960 --> 00:53:05,960 Speaker 1: was a good tip and actually something I'm trying to 1064 00:53:06,000 --> 00:53:08,799 Speaker 1: integrate like right now at this current moment. Too. Nice, dude, 1065 00:53:08,840 --> 00:53:10,359 Speaker 1: I love that. Okay, So I'll go ahead and share 1066 00:53:10,360 --> 00:53:12,560 Speaker 1: my second one, which was when he was talking about 1067 00:53:12,560 --> 00:53:15,120 Speaker 1: the space that we work in. He was talking about 1068 00:53:15,160 --> 00:53:17,279 Speaker 1: how like we should maybe invest a little bit of 1069 00:53:17,280 --> 00:53:19,920 Speaker 1: money into the space we work and have it be beautiful, 1070 00:53:20,000 --> 00:53:21,960 Speaker 1: have it be a space that we want to spend 1071 00:53:21,960 --> 00:53:24,120 Speaker 1: time in where we can be productive and don't cheap 1072 00:53:24,160 --> 00:53:26,319 Speaker 1: out on it. Yeah, and just you know, that's not 1073 00:53:26,360 --> 00:53:28,480 Speaker 1: going to give us permission to just go crazy and 1074 00:53:28,480 --> 00:53:30,160 Speaker 1: spend a ton of money, but you know, like let's 1075 00:53:30,200 --> 00:53:33,239 Speaker 1: find ways to make it an environment that we are 1076 00:53:33,320 --> 00:53:35,920 Speaker 1: are happy to be in where we can be productive. 1077 00:53:36,160 --> 00:53:37,719 Speaker 1: And aside from that, you know, what doesn't cost any 1078 00:53:37,760 --> 00:53:40,000 Speaker 1: money is just keeping a neat space. Like I'm thinking 1079 00:53:40,040 --> 00:53:42,680 Speaker 1: about times when I've been really you know where I 1080 00:53:42,719 --> 00:53:45,799 Speaker 1: felt underwater with my work. And you know what my 1081 00:53:45,880 --> 00:53:48,840 Speaker 1: desk looks underwater as well. It's just covered in papers 1082 00:53:48,880 --> 00:53:50,600 Speaker 1: and just tons of stuff that I have to get to, 1083 00:53:51,080 --> 00:53:52,920 Speaker 1: bills that I need to pay, like, there's books that 1084 00:53:52,960 --> 00:53:54,319 Speaker 1: I need to read, just stuff I need to throw 1085 00:53:54,360 --> 00:53:56,799 Speaker 1: away that's just been sitting there for weeks. Each one 1086 00:53:56,840 --> 00:53:59,000 Speaker 1: of those things I think can be a small distraction 1087 00:53:59,239 --> 00:54:01,640 Speaker 1: and something that's even though I'm not actively thinking about it, 1088 00:54:01,600 --> 00:54:03,520 Speaker 1: it's just something that kind of weighs on my mind. 1089 00:54:03,680 --> 00:54:05,960 Speaker 1: So that's something that took away as well. Awesome, that's 1090 00:54:06,040 --> 00:54:08,360 Speaker 1: very good, all right. So yeah, that the conversation with 1091 00:54:08,400 --> 00:54:10,359 Speaker 1: Kurt was really good and and his book was really 1092 00:54:10,360 --> 00:54:12,200 Speaker 1: really good too. And so we are giving away three 1093 00:54:12,200 --> 00:54:14,319 Speaker 1: copies of Kurt's book, and if you want to be 1094 00:54:14,440 --> 00:54:16,719 Speaker 1: entered to win a copy, all you have to do 1095 00:54:16,800 --> 00:54:19,400 Speaker 1: is leave a review for the show on Apple podcast 1096 00:54:19,480 --> 00:54:21,279 Speaker 1: and if you don't use an Apple device, you can 1097 00:54:21,320 --> 00:54:24,120 Speaker 1: leave one on Stitcher for the show. Once you leave 1098 00:54:24,160 --> 00:54:26,439 Speaker 1: that review, just send an email to us at how 1099 00:54:26,440 --> 00:54:28,719 Speaker 1: to Money pod at gmail dot com let us know 1100 00:54:28,800 --> 00:54:30,440 Speaker 1: what your screen name is and that you left a review, 1101 00:54:30,480 --> 00:54:32,480 Speaker 1: and we'll enter you into the drawing and we'll announce 1102 00:54:32,600 --> 00:54:34,879 Speaker 1: those winners one week from today on the show. Yeah, 1103 00:54:34,880 --> 00:54:36,760 Speaker 1: and there's a deadline too. Let's go ahead set that deadline. 1104 00:54:36,760 --> 00:54:38,920 Speaker 1: You have until noon this Friday, so make sure you 1105 00:54:38,960 --> 00:54:41,839 Speaker 1: get your reviews in and send us that email before noon. Yep. 1106 00:54:41,960 --> 00:54:43,560 Speaker 1: Let's quickly talk about the beer that we had on 1107 00:54:43,560 --> 00:54:46,800 Speaker 1: the show today. We drank a nice one Jackie Oh's Quatrefoil. 1108 00:54:47,200 --> 00:54:51,000 Speaker 1: This was an Okage sour ale conditioned on apricots. What's 1109 00:54:51,040 --> 00:54:53,600 Speaker 1: your take on this one? Man? Yeah? Well, first I'll say, man, 1110 00:54:53,680 --> 00:54:56,200 Speaker 1: just it was beautiful, like when we poured it the 1111 00:54:56,560 --> 00:54:58,799 Speaker 1: what do the color of it remind you of? I'll say, 1112 00:54:58,800 --> 00:55:01,919 Speaker 1: like a field of golden It was really pretty. Yeah, 1113 00:55:02,120 --> 00:55:04,560 Speaker 1: it was beautiful. I'll say apricots, like like I feel 1114 00:55:04,600 --> 00:55:06,920 Speaker 1: like it had the exact color of the fruit that 1115 00:55:06,960 --> 00:55:08,920 Speaker 1: was featured in this beer. But as far as the 1116 00:55:08,920 --> 00:55:13,120 Speaker 1: flavor goes, man like, it had such a bright, acidic flavor. Um, 1117 00:55:13,160 --> 00:55:15,000 Speaker 1: they had a lot of like lemon notes, you know, 1118 00:55:15,000 --> 00:55:18,360 Speaker 1: it was really acidic, like lemon, peach, oranges had like 1119 00:55:18,400 --> 00:55:21,040 Speaker 1: a lot of those fruity acidic notes of all those 1120 00:55:21,040 --> 00:55:22,759 Speaker 1: fruits that are that tend to be I don't know, 1121 00:55:22,840 --> 00:55:25,439 Speaker 1: like kind of the same color as apricots, right, yeah, yeah, 1122 00:55:25,440 --> 00:55:27,759 Speaker 1: everything was very blond and bright. So this was a 1123 00:55:27,800 --> 00:55:30,719 Speaker 1: blonde sour, which I personally enjoy a lot more than 1124 00:55:30,760 --> 00:55:32,799 Speaker 1: a like a darker sour. Yeah. I thought it was 1125 00:55:33,080 --> 00:55:35,920 Speaker 1: delicious and when it takes this long to make, it 1126 00:55:36,000 --> 00:55:38,000 Speaker 1: usually makes men better. This is a blend of one 1127 00:55:38,080 --> 00:55:40,839 Speaker 1: to three year old oak age sower blondel So these 1128 00:55:41,000 --> 00:55:42,680 Speaker 1: this beer is a long time in the making, which 1129 00:55:42,719 --> 00:55:45,919 Speaker 1: often can broaden the flavors that you're gonna taste into beer. 1130 00:55:46,120 --> 00:55:48,000 Speaker 1: These beers that are aged up to three years just 1131 00:55:48,040 --> 00:55:51,479 Speaker 1: developed so many interesting characteristics. So this was really really good. Yeah, 1132 00:55:51,600 --> 00:55:54,200 Speaker 1: I agree on acidic with like, I thought this kind 1133 00:55:54,200 --> 00:55:57,600 Speaker 1: of gentle sweetness and the apricots just shone through nicely, 1134 00:55:57,880 --> 00:56:00,440 Speaker 1: a little mouth pucker. It was just a really good 1135 00:56:00,440 --> 00:56:02,680 Speaker 1: sour beer. I enjoyed it a lot. And man, Jackieo's 1136 00:56:02,920 --> 00:56:04,920 Speaker 1: just making some really good beers. Yeah, thanks for the 1137 00:56:04,920 --> 00:56:06,719 Speaker 1: folks up there for sending this one in our away, 1138 00:56:06,760 --> 00:56:08,520 Speaker 1: so Joel, that's gonna be it for this episode. Man. 1139 00:56:08,640 --> 00:56:10,440 Speaker 1: You can find our show notes at how to money 1140 00:56:10,520 --> 00:56:12,680 Speaker 1: dot com and of course leave a review and get 1141 00:56:12,760 --> 00:56:15,759 Speaker 1: entered into this book giveaway and Matt until next time, 1142 00:56:15,960 --> 00:56:17,439 Speaker 1: best friends out, best friends out