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Speaker 1: Welcome back to the EDS. My name is Eddie Judge

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Speaker 1: and I got my partner here.

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Speaker 2: Moving in.

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Speaker 1: I think we should do this in Spanish today, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: we should. I will mock up all the words, though

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Speaker 1: I have to read. I'll have to plan for that one.

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Speaker 2: I bet our guest notes in Spanish.

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Speaker 1: So we have a special guest today, Ralph Pittman. He

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Speaker 1: is part of the Real Housewives of Atlanta. Was married

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Speaker 1: to Drew Siddora uh currently going through a separation divorce,

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Speaker 1: and what we know about him is they've been together

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Speaker 1: for eight years, step two children, and she You guys

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Speaker 1: have been on it for four seasons now, right, Ralph.

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Speaker 3: Yes, you got it, four our seasons.

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Speaker 1: Awesome. Ralph is a very interesting guy. I can't wait

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Speaker 1: to hear all about him. He's a new musician, an entrepreneur,

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Speaker 1: and author. He's got so many hats. You're a very

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Speaker 1: very interesting guy. I can't wait to get to know you, Ralph.

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Speaker 3: Fantastic. Thanks for having me. Also, I think, first and

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Speaker 3: allmost this is an amazing platform because I think, you know,

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Speaker 3: especially within this world, we're surrounded by all the women

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Speaker 3: they have the headlines and things of that nature. But

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Speaker 3: just for an opportunity for the guys to come together

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Speaker 3: because at the end of the day, and we are

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Speaker 3: such a huge part of the show as well. Yeah,

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Speaker 3: it's great to actually be here and thanks for the invite.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, of course, that's a great point you make. We

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Speaker 1: are a big part of their life on the show.

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Speaker 1: And I myself try to stay off the show because

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Speaker 1: it's just so full of fighting and drama and stuff

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Speaker 1: like that and I just can't deal with that. But

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Speaker 1: and the truth is, when our wives go out to battle,

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Speaker 1: if you will, they come home to us and we

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Speaker 1: listen and we hear, and we talk them off the

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Speaker 1: ledge and we you know, rationalize what's going on because

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Speaker 1: it's such a weird, unique situation to be on a

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Speaker 1: reality TV show where they take parts of your life

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Speaker 1: and you know, cut and slice and edit and make you,

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Speaker 1: you know, look good or bad. It just depends on

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Speaker 1: the storyline, right, got it. So so yeah, it's a

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Speaker 1: great point. So Ralph, tell us about who you are.

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Speaker 1: I mean, where did you grow up and where are

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Speaker 1: you from?

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Speaker 3: So yeah, so I grew up actually in New Brunswick,

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Speaker 3: New Jersey, and so I actually grew up there, didn't

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Speaker 3: go far for college, and ended up going to Rutgers University,

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Speaker 3: played football there, and you know, I got tired of

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Speaker 3: cole Weather and decided I wanted to pursue something different.

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Speaker 3: Ended up moving over to Los Angeles, and then my

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Speaker 3: life kind of just began started jumping into a little

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Speaker 3: bit of entertainment things. I was in real estate for

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Speaker 3: quite some time, a bunch of things in that particular pursuit.

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Speaker 3: Technology has been in my background for quite some time

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Speaker 3: as well. So I got my degree in business economics,

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Speaker 3: and so I would consider myself more of a business

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Speaker 3: that's also creative and so but music. I played piano,

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Speaker 3: you know, on played keyboard for a bunch of different people,

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Speaker 3: and you know, decided to go into production as well.

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Speaker 3: So it's like I've been doing a bunch of different journeys,

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Speaker 3: wearing both hats, right, technology side, real estate and then

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Speaker 3: also the creative side, which is more so of dippenent

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Speaker 3: to dabbling in the music.

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Speaker 1: Now, to me, it sounds like you get bored easy,

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Speaker 1: But I think the reality is is that you have

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Speaker 1: so many skills and talents that it's almost like it

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Speaker 1: doesn't matter what you do. You're good at it, right,

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Speaker 1: and so you keep doing it, and I assume there's

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Speaker 1: stuff that you're not good at, like me, I hate

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Speaker 1: baseball because I suck at it. But you know, there's

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Speaker 1: certain things that we have to get out there and

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Speaker 1: try before we find out if we're good at them

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Speaker 1: or not. Am I kind of onto you now? Like that?

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Speaker 1: Does that kind of describe your what motivates you, what

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Speaker 1: gets you up in the morning and why you want

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Speaker 1: to try so many things? Or why don't you tell us?

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Speaker 3: You know what? So this a really good question. I

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Speaker 3: think you're right, right. I feel like I have things

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Speaker 3: that I love to just do. That's my passion in

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Speaker 3: my heart, you know. And so music has been that,

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Speaker 3: to be perfectly frank with you, right, there's I think

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Speaker 3: I break it into two different areas. There's business, you know,

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Speaker 3: where I make my money, and then there's the things

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Speaker 3: that fill me up. And what fills me up is

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Speaker 3: the music aspect. Right Literally, I can sit down at

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Speaker 3: home and play the piano for hours, Like literally, I've

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Speaker 3: missed going out and been playing a pianel until three

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Speaker 3: four o'clock in the morning. I had like the best time,

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Speaker 3: big smile on my face. So that right there is

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Speaker 3: like my place of refuge, and so music has just

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Speaker 3: been that thing to where it's more passion but you know,

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Speaker 3: everything else and it's really not that many. But you know,

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Speaker 3: I look at it and uh, in their area of business,

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Speaker 3: anything that's going to help make money, anything that I'm

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Speaker 3: kind of passionate about or thinking about, like, all right,

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Speaker 3: this may be a great admiral. I'm looking to solve

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Speaker 3: a problem, you know. So it's like those are the

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Speaker 3: areas that I go into. So I would say in general,

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Speaker 3: I'm a solutionist and also a musician, and so whatever

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Speaker 3: the solution may be in whatever particular area, like for instance,

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Speaker 3: the books, the threat, for instance that I created a book.

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Speaker 3: I was working on a book called The Step and Parenting,

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Speaker 3: which is a book to help step fathers going through

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Speaker 3: the journey. You know, I'm a stepfather and pretty excited

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Speaker 3: about it. That's another thing. Let me jump into that.

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Speaker 3: My kids, you know, So so I have you know,

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Speaker 3: we have three, right so Jojo he's fourteen now and

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Speaker 3: just went to high school. I have my Mackay, he's

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Speaker 3: ten years old, and then my little baby girl who

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Speaker 3: is now seven years old. And so having you know,

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Speaker 3: having that dynamic was pretty different and that's something also

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Speaker 3: that was on television, and so Jojo is not biologically mine. However,

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Speaker 3: being a step father is probably the most it's it's

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Speaker 3: we'll look at it as the most rewarding and the

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Speaker 3: most fulfilling, yet the most challenging thing that you could

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Speaker 3: probably ever endure because you're getting mastered in a lot.

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Speaker 3: It's a lot of different challenges you go through. You

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Speaker 3: never really know what you're getting yourself into. And so

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Speaker 3: for me being a first time stepdad, I literally became

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Speaker 3: a stepdad before I became a biological father, and so

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Speaker 3: I wanted to actually help other people going through the

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Speaker 3: same particular journey and you know, really share some light

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Speaker 3: on it because I think that that's one of the

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Speaker 3: areas that is overlooked. And so it's like, all right,

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Speaker 3: you know what, this is a problem that I believe

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Speaker 3: I can solve. I can be able to help people,

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Speaker 3: and so let's write a book about it, and guess what,

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Speaker 3: we can also put it on a show, because now

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Speaker 3: we're focusing on real life and things that's actually happening,

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Speaker 3: and since they're capturing it, let's go and talk about

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Speaker 3: it and give it a platform that actually spent a

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Speaker 3: negative into a positive situation that people can actually benefit

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Speaker 3: and learn from. So that's kind of my unique kind

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Speaker 3: of way of trying to, you know, use the platform

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Speaker 3: for good when you know it's a show that's not

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Speaker 3: necessarily about us or it's about drama, but how can

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Speaker 3: you find that silver light, you know and really turning

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Speaker 3: it till a great opportunity.

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Speaker 1: That's a great point.

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Speaker 2: As a step father, do you start off passive? Do

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Speaker 2: you find yourself at first just being more hands off

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Speaker 2: while maybe you gained the confidence and where you have

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Speaker 2: gained the trust I should say to step in and

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Speaker 2: become a little more of a father figure or would

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Speaker 2: you always kind of hand off the entire time?

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Speaker 3: So great question. One of the things is that you

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Speaker 3: know as soon as you come in and let's take

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Speaker 3: it from the beginner, right. It has some fun with

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Speaker 3: your saying you first meet the woman, right, and you know,

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Speaker 3: you know what, I think she's amazing, And then all

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Speaker 3: of a sudden you like, okay, you got kids. Let

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Speaker 3: me meet the kids and see if they're not titlests.

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Speaker 3: You know what, these are some good kids. I actually

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Speaker 3: enjoy being with them and everything is fun. Right, You're like,

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Speaker 3: all right, let's go to the park, let's go and

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Speaker 3: do this, let me show you this, let me teach

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Speaker 3: you this, And it becomes that type of a dynamic

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Speaker 3: because that's the role that you play, especially if there's

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Speaker 3: a single mom and a father is not in or around.

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Speaker 3: You kind of take on that friend kind of a

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Speaker 3: role because you're still working on build a relationship with

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Speaker 3: the mom. Right, And once you decide all right, you know,

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Speaker 3: I'm ready to take things forward and take it to

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Speaker 3: the next level. They a lot of the times like, oh,

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Speaker 3: you know what, he's a father, you know, come on,

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Speaker 3: and so you kind of get pulled in. But I

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Speaker 3: believe that women typically don't understand exactly what a man's

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Speaker 3: role is and teaching, especially a boy. Right.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, So on the on the front end of things,

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Speaker 4: they kind of see the nice, positive, fun side of things,

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Speaker 4: which is, you know, the encouragement to support the jokes

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Speaker 4: they're playing basketball and things in the nature.

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Speaker 3: But in order to teach a man how to really

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Speaker 3: be a man and a survive out in this world,

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Speaker 3: it comes with discipline. Now, discipline looks really different than

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Speaker 3: anything anyone has ever seen, because it's like, no, we're

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Speaker 3: not going to do this you're not doing this. Hey,

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Speaker 3: this is the bedtime here, this is you know, And

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Speaker 3: so all of a sudden, structure starts to look like

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Speaker 3: a minute, this doesn't feel good. And even to that child,

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Speaker 3: it's like, wait, what is going on here? What happened

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Speaker 3: to that funny guy that would take me to the

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Speaker 3: park and getting ice, scream and let me do all

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Speaker 3: the things I'm you know, I wanted to do. And

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Speaker 3: so because the thing is, even as a stepfather or

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Speaker 3: even just coming in a dating phase, your goal is

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Speaker 3: to spend time with the you know, with the mom.

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Speaker 3: You spend you do your little thing with the kids

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Speaker 3: and everything, and then it's like, all right, I'm off

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Speaker 3: to the you know, to spend time with your mother.

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Speaker 3: But now that you are in the house and you're

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Speaker 3: living under one roof, there's a lot of structure that

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Speaker 3: you got to put in place. All right, pick up

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Speaker 3: your toys. You can't do this, you know, And so

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Speaker 3: that discipline looks different, and it's a way that you

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Speaker 3: have to roll it into and expectations that everyone needs

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Speaker 3: to have, especially even the biological mom. Right, it's like, hey,

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Speaker 3: all right, and so what I learned is that I

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Speaker 3: learned a couple of I learned a lot. Actually, one

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Speaker 3: of the things you know, to answer your your question,

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Speaker 3: I would say, when you start off in a step

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Speaker 3: parenting situation, you really want to actually not come in

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Speaker 3: as this disciplinarian. You want to come in and let

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Speaker 3: the mother be the disciplinarian. You have to build trust

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Speaker 3: with that child. How do you build trust? You kind

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Speaker 3: of got to do it, and so you can. There's

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Speaker 3: a couple of their strategies that you can use, like

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Speaker 3: the savior method, right, and so the kid does something,

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Speaker 3: the mom gets on them, and this is something it's

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Speaker 3: a game that you got to play, and you should

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Speaker 3: structure before you actually you know, and talk about it

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Speaker 3: like this is how we're going to do it. And

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Speaker 3: so we're gonna play good cop backop. The man should

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Speaker 3: be the bad the good cop. The woman should be

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Speaker 3: the back coop. But oh, you did this right here

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Speaker 3: you go get in trouble. No no, no, I have them,

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Speaker 3: let me, let me talk to him. And now you

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Speaker 3: come in and he's the kid is like, man, you

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Speaker 3: saved me. And now the kid has starting to gravitate

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Speaker 3: and open up a little more to you. You shouldn't

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Speaker 3: have done that. But this is how we can go

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Speaker 3: and do it. And you take a different type of

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Speaker 3: an approach, and I believe that there's these lines. You

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Speaker 3: need to understand exactly what those lines should actually be.

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Speaker 3: What do you want me to be in this relationship?

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Speaker 3: Do you want me to be the disciplinarian? Do you

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Speaker 3: want me to be this? And so once you have

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Speaker 3: those boundaries set, now you can really be able to

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Speaker 3: move forward in the copating journey so that everyone is

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Speaker 3: on the same page and you're not being emasculated as

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Speaker 3: a man.

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Speaker 1: Because that's brilliant. It sounds like some CIA spy shit,

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Speaker 1: but it is brilliant. I mean to really put your

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Speaker 1: heads together and come up with that plan. I can

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Speaker 1: see it working one hundred percent of the time. Because

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Speaker 1: my experience is that I had step children, but their

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Speaker 1: father was still in the picture. So I took an

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Speaker 1: approach of you know, I'm not going to step on

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Speaker 1: her shoes. As much as I have no respect for him,

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Speaker 1: and as much as a dead beat dead he might be,

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Speaker 1: I can't step in that role. And the kids have

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Speaker 1: to kind of figure it out on their own. They're

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Speaker 1: not going to do it as young kids. And the

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Speaker 1: more he pushed them not to like us like me.

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Speaker 1: The more he pushed them to, you know, saying all

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Speaker 1: these negative things about me, the more the kids realize, Okay,

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Speaker 1: this guy's an asshole. And eventually it backfired on him

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Speaker 1: and they ended up staying with us full time. But

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Speaker 1: I think it's a little bit easier, I don't know,

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Speaker 1: not having the father in the picture, because then they

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Speaker 1: all they have to learn is from you. And if you,

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Speaker 1: you know, play your cards right. And I love this

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Speaker 1: idea that you know, you guys put your heads together,

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Speaker 1: good cop, bad cup. I think that's going to work

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Speaker 1: one hundred percent of the time because you're going to

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Speaker 1: gain their trust, and that's kind of what you're saying,

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Speaker 1: right Edwin Lake. I have to gain their trust before

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Speaker 1: I even step into that role of disciplinary or you know,

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Speaker 1: guiding them.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I got really lucky with Bella's stepdad. I mean, he

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Speaker 2: could have been a better dad, and I've been kind

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Speaker 2: of hands off with that relationship and he's been great

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Speaker 2: and I haven't had to even get into what their

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Speaker 2: relationship is. He's always been very supportive. So but yeah,

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Speaker 2: I think to your point, I think it does change

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Speaker 2: the dynamic when the dad's not around as much. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: I think probably a little easier. Although for me, I've

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Speaker 2: been around for Bella and it was it's always and

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Speaker 2: easy with the step dad and I, uh so I

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Speaker 2: got really lucky with him.

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Speaker 3: But so you see all of these different dynamics that

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Speaker 3: we have here, right, Yeah, we have, you know, three men,

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Speaker 3: three completely different scenarios, you know, and I think that's

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Speaker 3: the that's the big thing about it, you know, being

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Speaker 3: able to really talk about it, and that's what the

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Speaker 3: book was about. Ended up getting killed before I could

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Speaker 3: actually release it, and you know.

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Speaker 2: To get killed us a good old D, the good

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Speaker 2: old D, the good old D. You know. So yeah, So, well,

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Speaker 2: before we get into that, I'm curious, So you played

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Speaker 2: football then obviously got into music. What did you do

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Speaker 2: first to do the football thing first or was it

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Speaker 2: always you were doing at the same time football music?

284
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Speaker 2: Obviously you want to Rutgers, so you were obviously pretty

285
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Speaker 2: good at football if you played Division one? So what

286
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Speaker 2: what what were you doing first? And how did business

287
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Speaker 2: come in? Was it more of I want to make

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Speaker 2: good money? Is this is why I want to get

289
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Speaker 2: into business? Or was the drive on that.

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Speaker 3: I feel like I was one of those Well, let

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Speaker 3: me start off with the first part of it. I

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Speaker 3: got into music when I was young, so I wanted

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Speaker 3: to play drums. I went to my mom had us

294
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Speaker 3: in church early on, and she would you know. The

295
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Speaker 3: thing is is that she would catch the holy doors.

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Speaker 3: Sometimes she was slacky, you know, so you never knew

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Speaker 3: what it was ever coming, right, So all of a

298
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Speaker 3: sudden you just had to watch out for the backhand

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Speaker 3: with the Holy Spirit hit you, you know. So so

300
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Speaker 3: I was like, you know what, I need to find

301
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Speaker 3: a different seat. So playing their drums was a real

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Speaker 3: safe place at the front by the drum set, and

303
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Speaker 3: I'm just watching it, and I just gravitated towards music anyway,

304
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Speaker 3: so you know, that was the main thing that I

305
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Speaker 3: was actually going towards. I realized that playing drums you

306
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Speaker 3: sweated a lot, and so I was like, you know what,

307
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Speaker 3: I need to play keys. And then actually it was funny.

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Speaker 3: One of my guys when I was playing football in

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Speaker 3: North Carolina. I went to Millburgh High School, and he

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Speaker 3: came into the locker room one day he was like, man,

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Speaker 3: I played the piano for my ground. She started crying.

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Speaker 3: I was like, what teaching me? S? You know, So

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Speaker 3: he taught me basically like and got me started playing

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Speaker 3: my first song, and that's kind of how I got started.

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Speaker 3: And then all of a sudden, one of my friends

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Speaker 3: that I was working on production with his father, came

317
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Speaker 3: to me and was like, Hey, you know what, I

318
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Speaker 3: heard you dipping dabble on a piano. How about I

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Speaker 3: hiring you to play at my church. I'll pay me

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Speaker 3: fifty dollars a Sunday, now, mind you you know. I

321
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Speaker 3: was like, yes, I'm a bluck college student. This was

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Speaker 3: absolutely amazing. So I started doing that also, but I've

323
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Speaker 3: always had a business kind of a mindset. I played football,

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Speaker 3: so you could say the music came first because I

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Speaker 3: came at a young age. Then football naturally came with school,

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Speaker 3: you know, And so I was actually doing that on

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Speaker 3: the side, and so some days I was going to

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Speaker 3: play at church, so I'll break off and do that,

329
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Speaker 3: and so, you know, so that's what ended up happening.

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Speaker 3: I graduated, I started doing internships in college of course,

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Speaker 3: naturally like many of us do, and that's kind of

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Speaker 3: where I ended up going and getting into technology. I

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Speaker 3: ended up getting a job at this company called Starter Systems,

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Speaker 3: and that kind of got me on the way, So

335
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Speaker 3: that put me pretty much right in technology, and so

336
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Speaker 3: from there that's pretty much been like the wheelhouse. So

337
00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:08,280
Speaker 3: and then on top of that the real estate. I

338
00:16:08,320 --> 00:16:10,400
Speaker 3: think real estate is something that everybody should be a

339
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Speaker 3: part of regardless. But I came up during that time

340
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Speaker 3: where we had the housing bubble. So as soon as

341
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Speaker 3: I graduated college really started getting my feet wet. All

342
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Speaker 3: of a sudden that happened, and I'm like, oh, we

343
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Speaker 3: got some other problems. And so it's been a it's

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Speaker 3: been a really interesting journey, but I've been enjoying it

345
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Speaker 3: so far and just having some fun.

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Speaker 2: So the college years, were you more of a girlfriend

347
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Speaker 2: type or were you like single, living it up, football player,

348
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Speaker 2: just you know, living it up, partying.

349
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Speaker 3: A little bit of both, a little bit of both.

350
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Speaker 3: So you know, you got you got the mixed bag.

351
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Speaker 3: It's like when you come from high school where you're like, oh,

352
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Speaker 3: this is what it is. Then you go to college

353
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Speaker 3: You're like, wait a minute, it's like a new world.

354
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Speaker 3: You know, it's just your mind is blown. And so

355
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Speaker 3: but I tried to make sure I was a little

356
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Speaker 3: focused as much as I could be. But at the

357
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Speaker 3: same time, you know, I loved I had my fun.

358
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Speaker 3: I can say I enjoyed college. I lived it up.

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Speaker 1: Did you ever aspire to play for the NFL or

360
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Speaker 1: were you just doing it because of the passion of football?

361
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Speaker 3: You know what I thought, that wasn't I did it

362
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Speaker 3: for the passion of football. I felt like I always

363
00:17:23,840 --> 00:17:26,280
Speaker 3: have these different things, even watching football. Now, I'm like, man,

364
00:17:26,320 --> 00:17:29,200
Speaker 3: I should have did this, I shouldn't make this, should

365
00:17:29,440 --> 00:17:31,360
Speaker 3: I should have walked hard? You know, like you got

366
00:17:31,359 --> 00:17:34,640
Speaker 3: all these different regrets now. But you know, it wasn't

367
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Speaker 3: something to where I was like, all right, I'm going

368
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Speaker 3: to the NFL with it. I was there. I wanted

369
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Speaker 3: to play it that I wanted to prove something to

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Speaker 3: myself that I was able to compete and play at

371
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Speaker 3: a different level. And then what ended up happening was

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Speaker 3: just because of my dynamic. I grew up in a

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Speaker 3: single family household, and I got to a place where

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Speaker 3: you know, and when I walked, I actually walked onto

375
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Speaker 3: the team. I walked onto the team. So when I

376
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Speaker 3: got on, you know, of course you got to earn

377
00:18:00,920 --> 00:18:03,040
Speaker 3: your stripes. At that point you got to really really

378
00:18:03,119 --> 00:18:06,000
Speaker 3: work because everybody's getting their head chopped off. And so

379
00:18:06,480 --> 00:18:08,240
Speaker 3: for me, I had to put in that work. But

380
00:18:08,320 --> 00:18:10,920
Speaker 3: at the same time, you need money, you know, so

381
00:18:11,119 --> 00:18:13,040
Speaker 3: it's like, all right, how do you really be able

382
00:18:13,040 --> 00:18:15,400
Speaker 3: to balance this because you got anybody that's on scholarship

383
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Speaker 3: and then you're over here, you know, trying to do

384
00:18:17,600 --> 00:18:19,480
Speaker 3: it all. So it was it was one of those

385
00:18:19,560 --> 00:18:21,359
Speaker 3: kind of things. And so what ended up happening is

386
00:18:21,480 --> 00:18:23,119
Speaker 3: is money started catching up to me. So I'm like,

387
00:18:23,280 --> 00:18:26,159
Speaker 3: I got to get my business fast, and so you

388
00:18:26,240 --> 00:18:28,040
Speaker 3: got to pay for this thing, right, it's not going

389
00:18:28,119 --> 00:18:31,080
Speaker 3: to feed itself. And then I'm starting to acquire new bills,

390
00:18:31,400 --> 00:18:33,440
Speaker 3: I got a car, I'm trying to do different things.

391
00:18:33,520 --> 00:18:37,159
Speaker 3: And so life started taking taking this away. And then

392
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Speaker 3: I ended up just jumping out getting into business. And

393
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Speaker 3: you know, I pretty much had a pretty successful career.

394
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Speaker 1: So how were your parents or you said single family

395
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Speaker 1: home you grew up in.

396
00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:52,720
Speaker 2: Mom or dad mom mom?

397
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Speaker 1: And do you have siblings that grew up with you

398
00:18:55,560 --> 00:18:56,680
Speaker 1: in that same household?

399
00:18:57,200 --> 00:18:59,160
Speaker 3: You got it. So I have a little brother, Brian.

400
00:18:59,560 --> 00:19:02,760
Speaker 1: Okay, so you were younger, you were the oldest. Okay,

401
00:19:02,960 --> 00:19:07,040
Speaker 1: I was What I'm getting at is what really inspired

402
00:19:07,160 --> 00:19:08,960
Speaker 1: you to be so motivated?

403
00:19:09,119 --> 00:19:10,119
Speaker 2: What what got you?

404
00:19:10,840 --> 00:19:13,000
Speaker 1: Did you have a mentor. Did you have a vision?

405
00:19:13,160 --> 00:19:16,160
Speaker 1: Did you just feel like you're always motivated? How did

406
00:19:16,280 --> 00:19:18,399
Speaker 1: what drives you? You know?

407
00:19:18,520 --> 00:19:20,560
Speaker 3: Interesting? I just wanted more out of life. You know.

408
00:19:20,720 --> 00:19:23,560
Speaker 3: I felt like I watched my mother struggle, and so

409
00:19:23,920 --> 00:19:25,639
Speaker 3: I kind of became the man in my house at

410
00:19:25,680 --> 00:19:28,640
Speaker 3: a really, really young age. My mom should get kind

411
00:19:28,640 --> 00:19:31,240
Speaker 3: of pissed off of me about that, like, Ralph, you're

412
00:19:31,240 --> 00:19:33,320
Speaker 3: a kid, I'm no, Mom, we got to be doing this.

413
00:19:33,680 --> 00:19:36,399
Speaker 3: As matter of fact, my brother got a really interesting story.

414
00:19:36,520 --> 00:19:38,920
Speaker 3: So one day my mother gives me some us some

415
00:19:39,040 --> 00:19:41,720
Speaker 3: money to go in and buy a snack from the store.

416
00:19:42,560 --> 00:19:44,840
Speaker 3: And you know, he takes the money and sends five

417
00:19:44,920 --> 00:19:47,159
Speaker 3: dollars on something. I'm like, no, you can't send that.

418
00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:52,000
Speaker 3: We got to save that money for our house, Like,

419
00:19:52,119 --> 00:19:54,440
Speaker 3: you know, that was the thing. I had my mind

420
00:19:54,520 --> 00:19:56,320
Speaker 3: set on what we can actually go and do, So

421
00:19:56,440 --> 00:19:59,440
Speaker 3: let's save this money, not spend it. And man, and

422
00:19:59,680 --> 00:20:01,800
Speaker 3: it a real big thing. So we got into this

423
00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:05,159
Speaker 3: huge argument around him just sending extra money trying to

424
00:20:05,200 --> 00:20:07,240
Speaker 3: be a kid. But I think it was I was

425
00:20:07,280 --> 00:20:09,639
Speaker 3: always kind of just ambitious. I just wanted more out

426
00:20:09,680 --> 00:20:12,280
Speaker 3: of life. I felt like I had something called I

427
00:20:12,320 --> 00:20:14,119
Speaker 3: would call inspirations. So what I would do is I

428
00:20:14,119 --> 00:20:16,800
Speaker 3: would ride my bike pass these really really big houses

429
00:20:17,440 --> 00:20:19,880
Speaker 3: and I would just go and just visualize and see

430
00:20:19,920 --> 00:20:22,440
Speaker 3: it all the time, like, man, I need the house.

431
00:20:22,600 --> 00:20:23,960
Speaker 3: I want that. I feel like I can get it.

432
00:20:24,240 --> 00:20:26,800
Speaker 3: And I would do that pretty regularly. So I wanted

433
00:20:26,840 --> 00:20:29,560
Speaker 3: to see what other people were doing, you know, that

434
00:20:29,760 --> 00:20:32,400
Speaker 3: wasn't a product of my environment and how they were

435
00:20:32,520 --> 00:20:34,760
Speaker 3: able to be successful in attaining that. And I'll never

436
00:20:34,840 --> 00:20:36,600
Speaker 3: put any kind of limitations on myself.

437
00:20:36,680 --> 00:20:37,760
Speaker 2: So that was it.

438
00:20:38,440 --> 00:20:43,080
Speaker 3: So everything I've acquired, I would say, is been through

439
00:20:43,160 --> 00:20:47,200
Speaker 3: visualization and really just wanting and expecting more out of life.

440
00:20:47,440 --> 00:20:51,439
Speaker 1: Kind of watching others. Right, that reminds me. I had

441
00:20:51,520 --> 00:20:54,320
Speaker 1: some pretty wealthy friends, and every time I went to

442
00:20:54,359 --> 00:20:56,680
Speaker 1: their house, I was like, Wow, this is how you're

443
00:20:56,720 --> 00:20:58,719
Speaker 1: supposed to live, right, right, right?

444
00:20:58,920 --> 00:20:59,119
Speaker 3: Do this?

445
00:20:59,480 --> 00:21:02,920
Speaker 1: You know, even today when I go to some really

446
00:21:03,040 --> 00:21:05,240
Speaker 1: rich people's homes, I'm like, this is how they're supposed

447
00:21:05,240 --> 00:21:06,359
Speaker 1: to live. But I don't know where I'm going to

448
00:21:06,400 --> 00:21:08,040
Speaker 1: get one hundred million dollars for this house.

449
00:21:11,200 --> 00:21:13,479
Speaker 2: Well it makes sense, right, You got to familiarize yourself

450
00:21:13,520 --> 00:21:15,480
Speaker 2: with the dream, right, You have to familiar you know

451
00:21:15,600 --> 00:21:17,800
Speaker 2: that story resonates with me because that's what I used

452
00:21:17,800 --> 00:21:20,359
Speaker 2: to do at fifteen years old. Is I just started

453
00:21:20,400 --> 00:21:23,920
Speaker 2: familiarizing myself with the dream. You know, even it just

454
00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:26,120
Speaker 2: reminds me when I couldn't afford the houses that I loved.

455
00:21:26,200 --> 00:21:28,720
Speaker 2: I would I call it taking action before you have

456
00:21:28,840 --> 00:21:30,679
Speaker 2: what you need. I would stay at a hotel at

457
00:21:30,760 --> 00:21:33,000
Speaker 2: least for a day in that same area, so I

458
00:21:33,040 --> 00:21:36,000
Speaker 2: could just get used to being in that area. And

459
00:21:36,359 --> 00:21:38,480
Speaker 2: then eventually you start to think, Okay, maybe I do

460
00:21:38,600 --> 00:21:41,280
Speaker 2: belong here. And then it's funny, your subconscious mind will

461
00:21:41,280 --> 00:21:43,320
Speaker 2: figure out a way to go get it. But if

462
00:21:43,359 --> 00:21:47,040
Speaker 2: you don't actually familiarize yourself with the dream, that dream

463
00:21:47,040 --> 00:21:49,600
Speaker 2: will never happen. You have to mimilarize it. You have

464
00:21:49,680 --> 00:21:51,520
Speaker 2: to touch the dream before you have what you need

465
00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:51,960
Speaker 2: for sure.

466
00:21:52,040 --> 00:21:55,280
Speaker 1: It's kind of like tasting a fine steak versus you know,

467
00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:59,560
Speaker 1: McDonald's burger steak. It's just so different.

468
00:21:59,760 --> 00:22:02,720
Speaker 2: It's, well, you figured you can't improve on something you're

469
00:22:02,720 --> 00:22:05,600
Speaker 2: not aware of, right right, Like if you've I remember,

470
00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:08,000
Speaker 2: for years, i'd never fly first class, like I'm not

471
00:22:08,040 --> 00:22:10,240
Speaker 2: spending money on that ship. Yeah, And then all of

472
00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:11,960
Speaker 2: a sudden I did. I'm like I ain't going back.

473
00:22:11,840 --> 00:22:14,280
Speaker 3: To them, you know.

474
00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:16,679
Speaker 2: But then before I didn't know what it was, right, right,

475
00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:19,120
Speaker 2: I was just like, I'd rather buy me a seven

476
00:22:19,200 --> 00:22:21,640
Speaker 2: hundred dollars short than freaking paste, you know, an extra

477
00:22:21,720 --> 00:22:23,960
Speaker 2: eight hundred bucks for first class, you know, I was,

478
00:22:24,119 --> 00:22:27,000
Speaker 2: but I knew fashion, I didn't know first class, and

479
00:22:27,080 --> 00:22:29,720
Speaker 2: I sat first class. I was like, all right, never again.

480
00:22:30,600 --> 00:22:32,359
Speaker 3: You know that's exactly it, you know what. So I

481
00:22:32,480 --> 00:22:35,320
Speaker 3: had two mentors also because I do believe it's you know,

482
00:22:35,600 --> 00:22:37,760
Speaker 3: being able to visualize, and then also the people that

483
00:22:37,960 --> 00:22:40,440
Speaker 3: you have that actually pours and takes time out of

484
00:22:40,480 --> 00:22:42,560
Speaker 3: their way. So I believe people come into your life

485
00:22:42,640 --> 00:22:44,480
Speaker 3: for three things, right, for a reason, a season in

486
00:22:44,520 --> 00:22:47,119
Speaker 3: a lifetime. Sometimes they're just to really be able to

487
00:22:47,160 --> 00:22:49,119
Speaker 3: help you along the journey. So I had a mentor

488
00:22:49,280 --> 00:22:52,560
Speaker 3: that was in technology. His name was Fred Song, and

489
00:22:52,680 --> 00:22:54,840
Speaker 3: he actually helped me get in the sales. He was like, yo, Rock,

490
00:22:54,880 --> 00:22:57,240
Speaker 3: what are you doing? He was like, man, you're an extrovert.

491
00:22:57,760 --> 00:23:00,359
Speaker 3: He was like, you know, you got personality here, like

492
00:23:00,520 --> 00:23:01,760
Speaker 3: this is where you need to be and this is

493
00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:04,080
Speaker 3: where people are really making money. And I'm like, oh really.

494
00:23:04,400 --> 00:23:07,000
Speaker 3: So he took me under his wings started getting me

495
00:23:07,520 --> 00:23:10,840
Speaker 3: different interviews and stuff like that, and really just helping me,

496
00:23:11,320 --> 00:23:14,359
Speaker 3: even taking time to Ralph you're not pronouncing his work correctly,

497
00:23:15,040 --> 00:23:17,040
Speaker 3: you know, if this kind of bites me here, you know,

498
00:23:17,200 --> 00:23:19,760
Speaker 3: So he would take time to actually say certain things.

499
00:23:19,800 --> 00:23:22,720
Speaker 3: And I had another mentor luiage of why and he

500
00:23:23,080 --> 00:23:27,600
Speaker 3: actually was like a cio of cardinal health when I first,

501
00:23:27,840 --> 00:23:30,520
Speaker 3: you know, I had an internship. And so watching him

502
00:23:30,600 --> 00:23:33,840
Speaker 3: like Jesus Helm the letter pretty quickly, like what did

503
00:23:33,880 --> 00:23:37,159
Speaker 3: you do? And so also just picking people's brains and

504
00:23:37,240 --> 00:23:39,640
Speaker 3: seeing what their habits are and seeing how they thought

505
00:23:39,800 --> 00:23:42,920
Speaker 3: and you know, how they moved. And so when I

506
00:23:43,000 --> 00:23:45,359
Speaker 3: love what you just said, right, you know, getting into

507
00:23:45,440 --> 00:23:47,880
Speaker 3: it and also getting around it, you know, getting around

508
00:23:47,920 --> 00:23:50,320
Speaker 3: the environment of it. You know, even if you want to,

509
00:23:50,359 --> 00:23:54,400
Speaker 3: I'd rather be the poorest person in a room than

510
00:23:54,560 --> 00:23:56,560
Speaker 3: you know, the richest person in the room any day,

511
00:23:56,680 --> 00:23:59,440
Speaker 3: because you can't learn from anybody who can't pull for someone.

512
00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:01,520
Speaker 3: You need somebody. I just want to help gravitate and

513
00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:02,359
Speaker 3: pull you up.

514
00:24:03,359 --> 00:24:06,760
Speaker 1: Because when you're at the top, everybody wants to be everywhere.

515
00:24:06,800 --> 00:24:12,440
Speaker 1: Everybody wants your place right exactly exactly, So now you're

516
00:24:12,440 --> 00:24:15,800
Speaker 1: fighting everybody to stay on your platform exactly.

517
00:24:18,160 --> 00:24:20,480
Speaker 2: Well, you know, you know it's funny is with Ralph.

518
00:24:20,680 --> 00:24:23,480
Speaker 2: You know we said at the beginning, he's obviously very talented.

519
00:24:23,560 --> 00:24:25,760
Speaker 2: He does different things, all these different things. He's really

520
00:24:25,800 --> 00:24:28,240
Speaker 2: good at him Another thing is really good at his fun.

521
00:24:28,320 --> 00:24:30,080
Speaker 2: Because I had a bunch of fun with I had

522
00:24:30,160 --> 00:24:32,400
Speaker 2: fun with him in Vegas. Ralph and I hung out

523
00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:35,399
Speaker 2: with Drew Teddy. This is what three years ago, right

524
00:24:35,640 --> 00:24:37,440
Speaker 2: or two three years ago? I think it was three

525
00:24:37,520 --> 00:24:40,639
Speaker 2: years ago. I mean we had a last and who

526
00:24:40,680 --> 00:24:42,320
Speaker 2: would have thought both of us now would be in

527
00:24:42,320 --> 00:24:44,760
Speaker 2: the middle of a divorce back then? Can you imagine

528
00:24:44,760 --> 00:24:49,520
Speaker 2: if we told Yeah, yep, I did not know what

529
00:24:49,560 --> 00:24:51,919
Speaker 2: I'm sorry to hear that, man, No, man, But who

530
00:24:51,920 --> 00:24:53,919
Speaker 2: would have known that? Right? We had such a blast.

531
00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:56,159
Speaker 2: I mean you think we were like both in like

532
00:24:56,320 --> 00:24:59,080
Speaker 2: these perfect relationships with how fun we had, how much

533
00:24:59,119 --> 00:25:01,560
Speaker 2: fun we had, and uh, you know, I bet if

534
00:25:01,560 --> 00:25:02,919
Speaker 2: I would have told you, hey, two years fromw you're

535
00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:04,280
Speaker 2: gonna be divorced, So you would have told me two

536
00:25:04,359 --> 00:25:05,960
Speaker 2: years from now I was going to be divorced or

537
00:25:06,040 --> 00:25:09,640
Speaker 2: in the middle of it, I told you freaking crazy, seriously,

538
00:25:10,600 --> 00:25:13,560
Speaker 2: you know, Yeah, So I guess in two years a

539
00:25:13,600 --> 00:25:15,119
Speaker 2: lot or two whatever, it was two three years. I

540
00:25:15,160 --> 00:25:16,920
Speaker 2: think it was more like two years. A lot of

541
00:25:16,960 --> 00:25:20,639
Speaker 2: stuff can actually change. Uh So, but before we get

542
00:25:20,680 --> 00:25:22,040
Speaker 2: into that, how'd you how'd you meet?

543
00:25:22,119 --> 00:25:22,320
Speaker 3: Drew?

544
00:25:22,480 --> 00:25:25,040
Speaker 2: And I guess where did some of these issues start

545
00:25:25,080 --> 00:25:25,600
Speaker 2: popping out?

546
00:25:26,160 --> 00:25:30,600
Speaker 3: So we actually met. We met actually in Los Angeles,

547
00:25:30,640 --> 00:25:32,760
Speaker 3: So I ended up taking a trip out there and

548
00:25:33,920 --> 00:25:35,760
Speaker 3: I was at a I was at a gala. She

549
00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:39,680
Speaker 3: ended up coming into the hotel and like instantly, I

550
00:25:39,760 --> 00:25:41,680
Speaker 3: think we kind of hit it all ended up going

551
00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:43,880
Speaker 3: and connecting and we just got married really really fast.

552
00:25:43,920 --> 00:25:47,399
Speaker 3: Everything moved quick, you know, so literally I was I

553
00:25:47,480 --> 00:25:49,600
Speaker 3: think I was in a state of readiness, right, I think,

554
00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:52,760
Speaker 3: you know, living a dream and being in Hollywood for

555
00:25:52,880 --> 00:25:55,320
Speaker 3: a while, it starts to get to you after a while,

556
00:25:55,400 --> 00:25:58,640
Speaker 3: you know it. So I ended up going. We ended

557
00:25:58,720 --> 00:26:01,439
Speaker 3: up dating for three I proposed three months. We were

558
00:26:01,520 --> 00:26:03,760
Speaker 3: married in five months. She was creating in eight months.

559
00:26:04,280 --> 00:26:06,679
Speaker 3: So it moved really fast. But we had a lot

560
00:26:06,760 --> 00:26:09,800
Speaker 3: of fun during that stage, you know, during those particular times,

561
00:26:09,840 --> 00:26:11,159
Speaker 3: and I felt like it was like, all right, this

562
00:26:11,320 --> 00:26:13,720
Speaker 3: is my Bonnie and Clyde. We used music is what

563
00:26:14,000 --> 00:26:17,560
Speaker 3: also kept us together because she was singing. She's an

564
00:26:17,600 --> 00:26:19,479
Speaker 3: amazing singer by the way, you know, so she's an

565
00:26:19,480 --> 00:26:22,240
Speaker 3: amazing sing I would produce and we would make songs

566
00:26:22,280 --> 00:26:24,720
Speaker 3: for sound different movie soundtracks and everything like that. So

567
00:26:24,840 --> 00:26:27,639
Speaker 3: it was it was amazing. I ended up playing for

568
00:26:27,680 --> 00:26:29,639
Speaker 3: a mom's church, like it was just a lot of

569
00:26:29,680 --> 00:26:33,280
Speaker 3: different synergies there. And then all of a sudden we

570
00:26:33,359 --> 00:26:35,000
Speaker 3: just got to the place where things just started to

571
00:26:35,119 --> 00:26:39,119
Speaker 3: just flourish. And at that point, once Mackay wash once

572
00:26:39,160 --> 00:26:40,919
Speaker 3: she was preyning with Makay, I was like, all right,

573
00:26:41,320 --> 00:26:43,600
Speaker 3: everything got to change, you know, the fun that we

574
00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:46,080
Speaker 3: were having, everything has to look different. Now we have

575
00:26:46,200 --> 00:26:48,240
Speaker 3: to go and create a different world. We ended up

576
00:26:48,240 --> 00:26:51,280
Speaker 3: moving from la to Chicago so that we can be

577
00:26:51,359 --> 00:26:53,840
Speaker 3: around support and I had to just go out there

578
00:26:53,880 --> 00:26:55,399
Speaker 3: and just kind of take over the world. She had

579
00:26:55,440 --> 00:26:57,680
Speaker 3: to sit down because of course she was you know,

580
00:26:58,800 --> 00:27:01,719
Speaker 3: she was pregnant, and so therefore it was pretty much

581
00:27:01,840 --> 00:27:04,159
Speaker 3: just like all on me just to make sure, you

582
00:27:04,240 --> 00:27:06,399
Speaker 3: know that everything was just taken care of, which I

583
00:27:06,560 --> 00:27:08,440
Speaker 3: was honored to actually go and do. And we ended

584
00:27:08,520 --> 00:27:10,040
Speaker 3: up having a pretty good life.

585
00:27:10,359 --> 00:27:13,560
Speaker 2: And then we got the call for us and how

586
00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:15,720
Speaker 2: many years into the relationship did you get that call.

587
00:27:16,040 --> 00:27:17,400
Speaker 1: Now you're in Atlanta, right.

588
00:27:17,840 --> 00:27:21,280
Speaker 3: Now, I'm in Atlanta. Yes, we got the call. She

589
00:27:21,400 --> 00:27:23,320
Speaker 3: got the call. I didn't here it, but you know,

590
00:27:23,720 --> 00:27:26,200
Speaker 3: I was extremely reluctant. I was like, no, not at all.

591
00:27:26,400 --> 00:27:28,879
Speaker 1: Were you familiar with the show when you got the call,

592
00:27:29,000 --> 00:27:29,800
Speaker 1: like you knew about it?

593
00:27:30,520 --> 00:27:33,879
Speaker 3: Yeah, I start with it. I've seen people getting destroyed.

594
00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:38,400
Speaker 1: And you want me to do what exactly?

595
00:27:38,520 --> 00:27:41,680
Speaker 3: So I said no. I think they were talking about

596
00:27:41,680 --> 00:27:43,400
Speaker 3: it for two years. I think she was talking about

597
00:27:43,440 --> 00:27:44,920
Speaker 3: going on it by herself. And I was like, I

598
00:27:44,960 --> 00:27:47,080
Speaker 3: don't want no parts of it. I made great money

599
00:27:47,119 --> 00:27:49,240
Speaker 3: to begin with. There's no reason for me to actually

600
00:27:49,280 --> 00:27:50,960
Speaker 3: go and do it. And on top of that, what's

601
00:27:51,160 --> 00:27:54,280
Speaker 3: the benefit for me. It's not it's a thinkless it's

602
00:27:54,280 --> 00:27:55,840
Speaker 3: a thinkless place to be, you know.

603
00:27:56,600 --> 00:28:00,720
Speaker 1: And so the guys don't get paid. I do have

604
00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:03,520
Speaker 1: a problem with not with working for free.

605
00:28:03,640 --> 00:28:06,639
Speaker 2: Hey, Ralph might get paid. I heard he does some confessionals.

606
00:28:06,760 --> 00:28:08,720
Speaker 2: By the way, what's the secret to get on the confessionals?

607
00:28:08,760 --> 00:28:11,600
Speaker 2: I haven't seen you in any confessionals that shows out and.

608
00:28:11,640 --> 00:28:14,040
Speaker 1: Doing a lot of money for confessionals.

609
00:28:14,200 --> 00:28:15,000
Speaker 3: How did you get in there?

610
00:28:15,040 --> 00:28:16,560
Speaker 2: On the confessionals, Ralph.

611
00:28:17,040 --> 00:28:19,840
Speaker 3: Go through a divorce. That's the way from back door.

612
00:28:22,560 --> 00:28:24,200
Speaker 2: That's how you do it, man.

613
00:28:24,520 --> 00:28:26,840
Speaker 3: Man. But you know, so I, you know, I said

614
00:28:26,920 --> 00:28:28,920
Speaker 3: no for a very long time, and then I ended

615
00:28:28,960 --> 00:28:32,320
Speaker 3: up I ended up saying, Okay, I'll do it. This

616
00:28:32,480 --> 00:28:36,000
Speaker 3: is the thing though, I kind of got bamboozled into

617
00:28:36,119 --> 00:28:38,280
Speaker 3: doing it because Drew told me that they were going

618
00:28:38,360 --> 00:28:40,400
Speaker 3: to be paying her thirty thousand dollars an episode to

619
00:28:40,440 --> 00:28:43,240
Speaker 3: do it, and I started doing the math, easy number.

620
00:28:43,520 --> 00:28:46,640
Speaker 3: Oh so no brainer, let's go, you know. And of

621
00:28:46,720 --> 00:28:48,440
Speaker 3: course at that point, at that time, she was a

622
00:28:48,520 --> 00:28:51,320
Speaker 3: stay at whole mother, and so going from zero to

623
00:28:51,920 --> 00:28:55,600
Speaker 3: you know, twenty episodes thirty thousand dollars an episode six

624
00:28:55,720 --> 00:28:59,400
Speaker 3: hundred thousand dollars, I'm like, all right, cool, that makes sense. Yeah, yeah,

625
00:29:00,360 --> 00:29:03,440
Speaker 3: totally was not back at all. So but by that time,

626
00:29:03,600 --> 00:29:05,880
Speaker 3: you pretty we were pretty much on it. We already

627
00:29:05,920 --> 00:29:10,000
Speaker 3: had moved relocated to Atlanta, uh, and then pretty much

628
00:29:10,040 --> 00:29:12,200
Speaker 3: set up shop. But I was always under the impression

629
00:29:12,320 --> 00:29:15,080
Speaker 3: of that particular number, and so of course we have

630
00:29:15,200 --> 00:29:16,880
Speaker 3: to go and do a test that they got to

631
00:29:16,880 --> 00:29:18,960
Speaker 3: make sure that they actually want you, because it's a

632
00:29:19,000 --> 00:29:21,479
Speaker 3: difference between them calling you and saying, yeah, we're excited

633
00:29:21,520 --> 00:29:22,960
Speaker 3: to have you, but they want to see how you

634
00:29:23,120 --> 00:29:26,680
Speaker 3: actually blend in with the with the other housewives.

635
00:29:26,760 --> 00:29:28,560
Speaker 1: You know, a full interview.

636
00:29:29,320 --> 00:29:32,600
Speaker 3: Well yeah, they we call they called it a test. Okay,

637
00:29:33,040 --> 00:29:35,400
Speaker 3: you know, so you're doing you're doing basically the test

638
00:29:35,720 --> 00:29:39,000
Speaker 3: where you're on. But you know how camera magic. They'll

639
00:29:39,040 --> 00:29:42,120
Speaker 3: have cameras on everybody, but they can eily put you out. Nah,

640
00:29:43,840 --> 00:29:46,040
Speaker 3: you did well in the interviews, you know, you said

641
00:29:46,080 --> 00:29:48,400
Speaker 3: the right things. But once you get around the girls,

642
00:29:48,960 --> 00:29:51,920
Speaker 3: you know, for drews per Se, you know, it's if

643
00:29:51,960 --> 00:29:54,400
Speaker 3: the energy wasn't there, she couldn't hold her own, or

644
00:29:54,400 --> 00:29:56,920
Speaker 3: if she kind of just shut down, then they can't

645
00:29:57,040 --> 00:29:58,760
Speaker 3: use you. They can't do anything with you. So they'll

646
00:29:59,080 --> 00:30:01,760
Speaker 3: touch you out and you will never exist on a show.

647
00:30:02,440 --> 00:30:05,040
Speaker 1: I had no idea because the way they've done it

648
00:30:05,120 --> 00:30:07,440
Speaker 1: in Orange County is they just pick them, throw them

649
00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:09,440
Speaker 1: on the show, and they they're sink or swim, and

650
00:30:10,200 --> 00:30:12,640
Speaker 1: you know, it's it's never like, hey, let's just get together,

651
00:30:12,720 --> 00:30:16,400
Speaker 1: see if there's some dynamics, what what chemistry there might

652
00:30:16,440 --> 00:30:19,560
Speaker 1: be there, what you know, what potential might be with

653
00:30:19,680 --> 00:30:22,239
Speaker 1: the cast. They never do that. They never ever did

654
00:30:22,280 --> 00:30:23,840
Speaker 1: they just throw them in here and like, okay, now

655
00:30:23,880 --> 00:30:24,640
Speaker 1: we got to deal with this.

656
00:30:27,600 --> 00:30:31,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, we've seen probably before because we came in during COVID.

657
00:30:31,960 --> 00:30:35,000
Speaker 3: But there were some people that actually was assuming that

658
00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:38,880
Speaker 3: we never saw again, you know, so, and they they

659
00:30:39,040 --> 00:30:41,560
Speaker 3: easily cut them right out. Maybe sometimes you may see

660
00:30:41,600 --> 00:30:43,880
Speaker 3: like an arm of a person, but you never see

661
00:30:43,920 --> 00:30:47,000
Speaker 3: the actual person because they cut you out. Yeah, of

662
00:30:47,080 --> 00:30:49,320
Speaker 3: course that's a way for you to pay you. Of course.

663
00:30:49,400 --> 00:30:52,360
Speaker 3: Also if you never appear on cameras, you never appear,

664
00:30:52,440 --> 00:30:56,360
Speaker 3: so you never do anything. Thank you, Good luck to you.

665
00:31:04,520 --> 00:31:09,040
Speaker 2: So how did that change your life? Notoriety? Now, now

666
00:31:09,120 --> 00:31:11,960
Speaker 2: what happens you're on the show. Are you getting I

667
00:31:12,040 --> 00:31:15,520
Speaker 2: mean obviously options probably increase, Your d ms are probably

668
00:31:15,520 --> 00:31:19,640
Speaker 2: blowing up. Now, Uh get a little fan club? I

669
00:31:19,680 --> 00:31:20,760
Speaker 2: did you start dealing with all that?

670
00:31:21,200 --> 00:31:23,040
Speaker 1: Your business brain is going?

671
00:31:23,160 --> 00:31:23,280
Speaker 3: Now?

672
00:31:23,960 --> 00:31:25,000
Speaker 1: How can I leverage this?

673
00:31:25,960 --> 00:31:29,120
Speaker 3: Yes? I came on pretty unique. Also, I came on

674
00:31:29,200 --> 00:31:34,360
Speaker 3: pretty explosive, probably one of the most explosive guys okay history,

675
00:31:35,360 --> 00:31:38,760
Speaker 3: and it was became in hot Wait.

676
00:31:40,760 --> 00:31:43,200
Speaker 1: So but did you get naked in the hot tub?

677
00:31:43,680 --> 00:31:44,520
Speaker 3: I did not do that.

678
00:31:49,040 --> 00:31:50,760
Speaker 2: Day one South porn style.

679
00:31:51,000 --> 00:31:56,160
Speaker 1: It was all downhill. After day one, Bro, where do

680
00:31:56,280 --> 00:31:56,920
Speaker 1: I go from here?

681
00:31:57,760 --> 00:31:58,640
Speaker 3: Serious? Serious?

682
00:31:59,240 --> 00:32:02,080
Speaker 1: Tell us, tell us about your first day, like your

683
00:32:02,440 --> 00:32:02,880
Speaker 1: big day.

684
00:32:03,560 --> 00:32:06,360
Speaker 3: So I ended up so my infamous storyline, so I

685
00:32:06,400 --> 00:32:08,520
Speaker 3: don't have the hot tub being naked, you know, but

686
00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:12,120
Speaker 3: I went to Tampa. Tampa became my storyline that everybody

687
00:32:12,280 --> 00:32:14,600
Speaker 3: just talked about and it was just crazy. But the

688
00:32:14,680 --> 00:32:16,640
Speaker 3: crazy the interesting part is that I went to Tampa

689
00:32:16,720 --> 00:32:20,960
Speaker 3: before we started filming. So of course I'm naive. I

690
00:32:21,000 --> 00:32:23,200
Speaker 3: don't know how we have a TV work. So I'm thinking,

691
00:32:23,320 --> 00:32:26,120
Speaker 3: if it didn't happen on camera, it doesn't exist, you know.

692
00:32:26,720 --> 00:32:30,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, and no face, no case exactly, you know it.

693
00:32:31,160 --> 00:32:34,920
Speaker 3: So basically our first day filming, uh, they wanted to

694
00:32:35,120 --> 00:32:39,520
Speaker 3: film actually doing our real anniversary, and so I'm like, no, guys,

695
00:32:39,640 --> 00:32:42,280
Speaker 3: you know, this is our anniversary. I'm not gonna We're

696
00:32:42,320 --> 00:32:43,840
Speaker 3: not going to do it. They're like, it's not gonna

697
00:32:43,840 --> 00:32:46,120
Speaker 3: be long. We just need you for an hour. I'm

698
00:32:46,160 --> 00:32:48,960
Speaker 3: like okay. So we went and I was like, all right,

699
00:32:49,000 --> 00:32:51,280
Speaker 3: it's our anniversary. I'm gonna roll out the carpet and

700
00:32:51,400 --> 00:32:53,600
Speaker 3: we just go on, you know, really celebrate.

701
00:32:54,000 --> 00:32:54,120
Speaker 1: You know.

702
00:32:54,160 --> 00:32:57,000
Speaker 3: I pulled up my iPad on how I proposed and

703
00:32:57,120 --> 00:33:01,120
Speaker 3: Drew I was like, literally jus frying happy, which I love,

704
00:33:01,200 --> 00:33:03,120
Speaker 3: by the way, you know. So she give me all

705
00:33:03,160 --> 00:33:05,200
Speaker 3: the things I tucked, the covered strawberries. I'm like, look,

706
00:33:05,280 --> 00:33:07,520
Speaker 3: this is when I asked Jojo, can I marry you?

707
00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:09,800
Speaker 3: And you know, and it was like all of these

708
00:33:09,880 --> 00:33:12,080
Speaker 3: different things. The producer came out. He was like, yeah,

709
00:33:12,520 --> 00:33:14,920
Speaker 3: that's all good. He was like, but let's talk about

710
00:33:14,960 --> 00:33:18,760
Speaker 3: where he went. I was like, oh, really, but that's

711
00:33:18,800 --> 00:33:20,720
Speaker 3: what you want to give him, Like all right, whatever.

712
00:33:21,600 --> 00:33:24,360
Speaker 3: And the thing is that this is the crazy thing

713
00:33:24,960 --> 00:33:27,360
Speaker 3: I never already spoken to Drew about like where I went,

714
00:33:27,600 --> 00:33:30,800
Speaker 3: because I mean I did leave during a pandemic. It

715
00:33:30,880 --> 00:33:32,960
Speaker 3: was kind of crazy. She had broke she had tore

716
00:33:33,000 --> 00:33:36,840
Speaker 3: her achilles, she had an infection. I had gotten really

717
00:33:36,880 --> 00:33:40,520
Speaker 3: pissed off also because we were just arguing about school

718
00:33:40,720 --> 00:33:44,720
Speaker 3: and all these other things that was happening. This is backstory.

719
00:33:44,880 --> 00:33:47,040
Speaker 3: She didn't want to go to a doctor's appointment to

720
00:33:47,080 --> 00:33:49,840
Speaker 3: see because he had a staff infection, so she canceled

721
00:33:49,880 --> 00:33:53,120
Speaker 3: the doctor's appointment for the staff infection to go and

722
00:33:54,040 --> 00:33:56,200
Speaker 3: to go and be with the kids doing homeschool, you know.

723
00:33:56,360 --> 00:33:57,920
Speaker 3: And I'm like, wait a minute, I was like, but

724
00:33:58,480 --> 00:34:01,200
Speaker 3: if you have a staff infection, you die. The log

725
00:34:01,200 --> 00:34:03,680
Speaker 3: of people decision to go to the doctors forget about

726
00:34:03,720 --> 00:34:06,640
Speaker 3: the first day. Assuming you know, we got I can

727
00:34:06,720 --> 00:34:09,719
Speaker 3: do it. Your mother's here. We are fine with that,

728
00:34:10,080 --> 00:34:12,320
Speaker 3: go to the doctors. So we get into the argument,

729
00:34:12,840 --> 00:34:14,960
Speaker 3: and you know, some other things happen. We get into

730
00:34:15,040 --> 00:34:18,600
Speaker 3: the car, have a huge argument, and then she and

731
00:34:18,719 --> 00:34:21,160
Speaker 3: then after that, she said some things that I felt

732
00:34:21,200 --> 00:34:23,960
Speaker 3: that was extremely disrespectful, and I was like, you know what,

733
00:34:24,080 --> 00:34:25,600
Speaker 3: I gotta I gotta get out of here. I need

734
00:34:25,680 --> 00:34:26,840
Speaker 3: a break, so I'll leave you.

735
00:34:27,000 --> 00:34:27,120
Speaker 2: Right.

736
00:34:27,480 --> 00:34:28,880
Speaker 3: I go to I don't know where I'm going. I

737
00:34:28,920 --> 00:34:32,319
Speaker 3: go to Tampa. Look in Tampa, go to the beach.

738
00:34:32,360 --> 00:34:35,560
Speaker 3: I'm running. Mind you, it was the pandemic, so everybody

739
00:34:35,640 --> 00:34:38,319
Speaker 3: had COVID, you know, so it was just me up.

740
00:34:38,360 --> 00:34:41,120
Speaker 3: There's a ghost town, so I go there. I'm out

741
00:34:41,160 --> 00:34:43,160
Speaker 3: there for a second. Then I come back home, falling

742
00:34:43,200 --> 00:34:45,840
Speaker 3: place like nothing ever happened. We go through the filming,

743
00:34:46,320 --> 00:34:49,840
Speaker 3: and then when that happened, we get into this argument

744
00:34:49,920 --> 00:34:52,200
Speaker 3: and she's like, you know, Ralph, where did you go?

745
00:34:52,440 --> 00:34:53,960
Speaker 3: And I'm like, it's not about and I thought I

746
00:34:54,000 --> 00:34:56,120
Speaker 3: said something very poetic, right, I was like, it's not

747
00:34:56,239 --> 00:34:59,600
Speaker 3: about where I went, it's about why, because that's going

748
00:34:59,640 --> 00:35:02,160
Speaker 3: to prevent me from going again. I thought I said

749
00:35:02,200 --> 00:35:05,600
Speaker 3: something very fun. Man. He took that. They took that

750
00:35:05,760 --> 00:35:11,160
Speaker 3: sound like me, and that's what ended up happening. So

751
00:35:11,680 --> 00:35:13,440
Speaker 3: they were where did you go? Where did you go?

752
00:35:13,560 --> 00:35:15,759
Speaker 3: So all the women started attacking me and everything like that.

753
00:35:15,880 --> 00:35:19,160
Speaker 3: When it council, I would say this. When that episode

754
00:35:19,400 --> 00:35:21,200
Speaker 3: came on, it was a sad day. I was up

755
00:35:21,239 --> 00:35:25,279
Speaker 3: in the closet holding myself. It was.

756
00:35:27,080 --> 00:35:28,600
Speaker 2: So how long were you gone for?

757
00:35:29,800 --> 00:35:30,399
Speaker 3: No left food?

758
00:35:30,440 --> 00:35:30,480
Speaker 2: What?

759
00:35:30,640 --> 00:35:31,920
Speaker 3: Three days? Okay?

760
00:35:32,080 --> 00:35:34,120
Speaker 2: So three days like just not answering anything.

761
00:35:35,120 --> 00:35:39,480
Speaker 3: Mm hmmm. We talked, Oh, we talked. We talked all

762
00:35:39,520 --> 00:35:43,600
Speaker 3: the time, you know, be a text message, you know,

763
00:35:44,080 --> 00:35:46,200
Speaker 3: like hey, you know this person is going to come

764
00:35:46,239 --> 00:35:47,880
Speaker 3: over to the house, X, Y and Z. But it

765
00:35:47,960 --> 00:35:51,600
Speaker 3: wasn't anything to where I was just like gone and

766
00:35:51,719 --> 00:35:52,680
Speaker 3: rolled off the face of the earth.

767
00:35:52,719 --> 00:35:54,880
Speaker 2: I think that's fine. I thought you left for like

768
00:35:54,960 --> 00:35:56,640
Speaker 2: three days and just didn't pick up your phone.

769
00:35:57,200 --> 00:35:59,320
Speaker 3: No, not at all. She she wasn't contact with me

770
00:35:59,360 --> 00:36:02,359
Speaker 3: pretty much time. But it was just I needed a break,

771
00:36:02,440 --> 00:36:05,120
Speaker 3: I did. I needed a break. Yeah, I needed a break.

772
00:36:05,239 --> 00:36:09,800
Speaker 3: So and I understand now, I understand exactly the impact

773
00:36:09,880 --> 00:36:13,319
Speaker 3: of me doing that. You know, I should have communicated

774
00:36:13,360 --> 00:36:14,680
Speaker 3: I didn't know where I was going to begin with,

775
00:36:14,840 --> 00:36:16,799
Speaker 3: but by the way, I should have just been like, hey,

776
00:36:16,840 --> 00:36:19,000
Speaker 3: look this is where I'm you know, this is where

777
00:36:19,000 --> 00:36:21,800
Speaker 3: I'm going and x y Z. But I thought that

778
00:36:22,040 --> 00:36:25,840
Speaker 3: if the reality of it is is that, and I

779
00:36:25,880 --> 00:36:27,640
Speaker 3: don't have nothing bad to say, right, I don't have

780
00:36:27,800 --> 00:36:29,520
Speaker 3: anything bad to say because you and I are not

781
00:36:29,640 --> 00:36:32,840
Speaker 3: in a terrible place or nothing like that. But but

782
00:36:33,600 --> 00:36:36,759
Speaker 3: I would say that going through that process, I would

783
00:36:36,800 --> 00:36:38,839
Speaker 3: have thought that she would have responded differently, like it'd

784
00:36:38,880 --> 00:36:40,960
Speaker 3: been just a regular conversation. I just didn't expect her

785
00:36:41,040 --> 00:36:43,120
Speaker 3: to kind of like go off about it and start crying,

786
00:36:43,520 --> 00:36:46,080
Speaker 3: because that's not what I typically would experience with her.

787
00:36:46,600 --> 00:36:48,880
Speaker 3: So he caught me off guard. But you know, but

788
00:36:48,960 --> 00:36:51,839
Speaker 3: she's a great actress, so she kind of played into

789
00:36:51,880 --> 00:36:54,399
Speaker 3: this damsel in distress roll and I'm sitting here like wait,

790
00:36:54,560 --> 00:37:00,520
Speaker 3: what is going on? And my ass And so from

791
00:37:00,600 --> 00:37:03,400
Speaker 3: there I had to figure out exactly how to start navigating.

792
00:37:03,400 --> 00:37:06,080
Speaker 3: I'm like, okay, I'm the villain, yep, all right, said

793
00:37:06,160 --> 00:37:08,680
Speaker 3: I'm the villain. How do I make sure that I

794
00:37:08,719 --> 00:37:10,959
Speaker 3: could be a great villain because you know, as guys,

795
00:37:11,040 --> 00:37:13,640
Speaker 3: what we could do is instead of when instead of

796
00:37:13,680 --> 00:37:15,360
Speaker 3: you going in and getting make it in the strip

797
00:37:15,440 --> 00:37:17,879
Speaker 3: in the uh say the script car, but getting maked

798
00:37:17,920 --> 00:37:20,880
Speaker 3: in a jacuzzie, you could have just been sitting at

799
00:37:20,920 --> 00:37:23,200
Speaker 3: home and never opening your mouth and just refusing to

800
00:37:23,320 --> 00:37:26,279
Speaker 3: do anything right right, it's quiet, because I mean that's

801
00:37:26,280 --> 00:37:28,520
Speaker 3: something that we could do. But this is where I

802
00:37:28,600 --> 00:37:31,520
Speaker 3: say the men are dynamic because we get in there

803
00:37:31,600 --> 00:37:33,480
Speaker 3: and we roll our sleeves up and we act the

804
00:37:33,560 --> 00:37:37,160
Speaker 3: fool also, which also guarantees the women another season because

805
00:37:37,200 --> 00:37:39,800
Speaker 3: that's a story line there. You know, what did he do?

806
00:37:40,160 --> 00:37:41,040
Speaker 3: Oh my god?

807
00:37:41,280 --> 00:37:41,440
Speaker 1: You know.

808
00:37:42,040 --> 00:37:45,520
Speaker 3: And so by that dynamic, you become a household name

809
00:37:45,640 --> 00:37:49,640
Speaker 3: yourself because you're this infamous husband. And the husband's player

810
00:37:50,040 --> 00:37:53,440
Speaker 3: a huge role, especially, I would say, you know, especially

811
00:37:53,520 --> 00:37:56,880
Speaker 3: in Atlanta, you know, with Todd and and all these guys,

812
00:37:57,000 --> 00:38:01,480
Speaker 3: Peter and Apollo. During that era, the guys were dominating.

813
00:38:01,600 --> 00:38:04,040
Speaker 3: They were like they were a little crazy. Then I

814
00:38:04,160 --> 00:38:07,840
Speaker 3: came in. It was me and Todd and Ross. You know,

815
00:38:08,040 --> 00:38:10,120
Speaker 3: we were doing our thing. We would have good conversation.

816
00:38:10,400 --> 00:38:12,560
Speaker 3: I would bring out to call me day in the kitchen,

817
00:38:12,600 --> 00:38:15,680
Speaker 3: aprons and everything like that, which we were doing some things.

818
00:38:15,760 --> 00:38:17,359
Speaker 3: And then also it's like, all right, if we're going

819
00:38:17,400 --> 00:38:19,680
Speaker 3: to play into it, we're gonna do TV. Let's let's

820
00:38:19,760 --> 00:38:22,440
Speaker 3: really do it. Yeah, and which is going to guarantee

821
00:38:22,440 --> 00:38:24,439
Speaker 3: you're going to stay on the show. But also let's

822
00:38:24,480 --> 00:38:28,040
Speaker 3: create some opportunity. So the business ed you said it, right,

823
00:38:28,160 --> 00:38:30,520
Speaker 3: the business mind starts going off like, all right, this

824
00:38:30,680 --> 00:38:33,160
Speaker 3: is an opportunity to be able to capitalize. All right,

825
00:38:33,280 --> 00:38:35,160
Speaker 3: this and how to go and do it? Because if

826
00:38:35,200 --> 00:38:39,920
Speaker 3: you do something and it's not enough, let's use the

827
00:38:39,960 --> 00:38:43,880
Speaker 3: word if it's not enough, not I should say, you

828
00:38:43,920 --> 00:38:48,759
Speaker 3: can say tension or or controversy, it won't make the show.

829
00:38:49,080 --> 00:38:51,759
Speaker 3: It has to be controversial in order for to do it.

830
00:38:51,880 --> 00:38:54,759
Speaker 3: And so we did it, like literally, I feel like

831
00:38:55,080 --> 00:38:56,719
Speaker 3: Drew and I were at a place where we were

832
00:38:56,760 --> 00:39:00,200
Speaker 3: actually having almost we were at a place where we

833
00:39:00,239 --> 00:39:02,600
Speaker 3: were both having really big scenes. Would I had her

834
00:39:02,680 --> 00:39:05,920
Speaker 3: doing music which I also produced music already know, you know,

835
00:39:06,200 --> 00:39:08,200
Speaker 3: So that's the name of the song that I produced

836
00:39:08,280 --> 00:39:10,880
Speaker 3: with her, and so I had that being the storyline,

837
00:39:11,080 --> 00:39:13,160
Speaker 3: and then I had the book being the storyline also,

838
00:39:13,360 --> 00:39:15,879
Speaker 3: So she's doing her music journey. I'm doing the book

839
00:39:15,960 --> 00:39:19,360
Speaker 3: journey all at the same time during the season, and

840
00:39:19,520 --> 00:39:22,479
Speaker 3: I mean that, right, there's two major opportunities to make money,

841
00:39:22,920 --> 00:39:25,920
Speaker 3: you know, outside of this, because the thing about reality

842
00:39:26,000 --> 00:39:29,160
Speaker 3: TV that I think people don't realize is once the

843
00:39:29,280 --> 00:39:32,560
Speaker 3: cameras go down and they say you're done, literally all

844
00:39:32,640 --> 00:39:34,920
Speaker 3: your money stops. So if they're paying you half a million,

845
00:39:35,160 --> 00:39:39,560
Speaker 3: a million, two million dollars, that is gone as soon

846
00:39:39,600 --> 00:39:41,600
Speaker 3: as they touch you, and you got to figure out

847
00:39:41,600 --> 00:39:44,080
Speaker 3: how to make that two million back if that's a

848
00:39:44,120 --> 00:39:46,120
Speaker 3: part of your lifestyle, and that's where a lot of

849
00:39:46,200 --> 00:39:49,040
Speaker 3: people end up, you know, getting themselves killed because they

850
00:39:49,080 --> 00:39:51,960
Speaker 3: can't handle they didn't create enough businesses to be able

851
00:39:52,000 --> 00:39:55,160
Speaker 3: to sustain themselves once their life turns off.

852
00:39:55,719 --> 00:39:57,640
Speaker 2: Right, did you have any season where you didn't have

853
00:39:57,680 --> 00:40:00,279
Speaker 2: any drama or where they are drama ones.

854
00:40:00,840 --> 00:40:04,520
Speaker 3: I'm having drama right now, and I'm like, I've always

855
00:40:04,600 --> 00:40:06,560
Speaker 3: found myself in drama for some reason, even when I

856
00:40:06,560 --> 00:40:10,080
Speaker 3: don't ask, I try to be good. I was like,

857
00:40:10,080 --> 00:40:12,279
Speaker 3: all right, this is gonna be a tom year for me,

858
00:40:12,719 --> 00:40:15,080
Speaker 3: and then my name just gets thrown in there because

859
00:40:15,120 --> 00:40:17,360
Speaker 3: I feel like I'm collateral damage all the time. It's like,

860
00:40:17,760 --> 00:40:20,800
Speaker 3: if you need a storyline, Paul use Ross, there you go.

861
00:40:21,120 --> 00:40:23,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, Ralphield, do it?

862
00:40:24,080 --> 00:40:25,640
Speaker 3: So are you still so? Speaking of that?

863
00:40:25,800 --> 00:40:26,080
Speaker 1: So are you?

864
00:40:26,320 --> 00:40:26,520
Speaker 3: Are you?

865
00:40:26,600 --> 00:40:30,600
Speaker 2: You're living? Are you still living in the basement? That's

866
00:40:30,600 --> 00:40:31,120
Speaker 2: the last.

867
00:40:31,080 --> 00:40:33,480
Speaker 3: Basement right now. So this is my grand studio here.

868
00:40:33,520 --> 00:40:36,000
Speaker 3: I had my podcast and everything, but this is the

869
00:40:36,080 --> 00:40:38,560
Speaker 3: podcast area here. So yeah, I'm still here.

870
00:40:38,800 --> 00:40:41,880
Speaker 1: Well, let's let's rewind back a little bit more before

871
00:40:41,920 --> 00:40:45,759
Speaker 1: we go into that. I I know that, and I'm

872
00:40:45,840 --> 00:40:50,719
Speaker 1: sure Edwin can agree. There is a not a stigma,

873
00:40:50,920 --> 00:40:53,439
Speaker 1: but kind of a curse of the Real Housewife show

874
00:40:53,560 --> 00:40:57,520
Speaker 1: where there's a lot of divorces in the show. Do

875
00:40:57,640 --> 00:41:02,560
Speaker 1: you feel like the show kind of of forced this

876
00:41:02,640 --> 00:41:06,239
Speaker 1: stealth in the cracks of your relationship that that contributed

877
00:41:06,280 --> 00:41:10,640
Speaker 1: to the divorce or did you have divorce as one

878
00:41:10,680 --> 00:41:12,320
Speaker 1: of the things in your mind, like I don't know

879
00:41:12,400 --> 00:41:15,759
Speaker 1: if this is going to be a forever relationship. You know,

880
00:41:15,880 --> 00:41:19,520
Speaker 1: it was that divorce the d word around before the

881
00:41:19,600 --> 00:41:22,680
Speaker 1: show or was it prominent once you got on the show?

882
00:41:23,760 --> 00:41:27,600
Speaker 3: Great question. I would say that I talked about divorce

883
00:41:27,640 --> 00:41:30,680
Speaker 3: before the show actually did come all around, just because

884
00:41:31,360 --> 00:41:34,279
Speaker 3: I feel like from a compatibility perspective, we didn't have

885
00:41:34,320 --> 00:41:37,800
Speaker 3: an opportunity to know each other as well as I

886
00:41:37,920 --> 00:41:40,880
Speaker 3: probably would have needed to know each each other. Right,

887
00:41:42,160 --> 00:41:45,440
Speaker 3: You really need time to really establish with someone to

888
00:41:45,560 --> 00:41:49,400
Speaker 3: understand are you. We We have compatibility on all these

889
00:41:49,480 --> 00:41:51,879
Speaker 3: various different levels, and there's nothing that's going to break.

890
00:41:52,320 --> 00:41:56,000
Speaker 3: And so what ended up happening in my situation, I

891
00:41:56,040 --> 00:41:58,960
Speaker 3: would say the show contributed because I would have saved.

892
00:41:59,560 --> 00:42:01,319
Speaker 3: And I feel like men do a really great job

893
00:42:01,400 --> 00:42:03,680
Speaker 3: of just suffering regardless. I wanted to make sure, not

894
00:42:03,920 --> 00:42:06,320
Speaker 3: before anything else. I'm a father and I love my

895
00:42:06,440 --> 00:42:08,320
Speaker 3: kids with all my heart, and so I would have

896
00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:11,479
Speaker 3: saved because I don't believe in having anyone else raising

897
00:42:11,560 --> 00:42:13,799
Speaker 3: my kids. I want to make sure that I can

898
00:42:13,880 --> 00:42:16,640
Speaker 3: pour into them. I didn't have my father as much

899
00:42:16,719 --> 00:42:18,560
Speaker 3: in my life as much as I wanted to to

900
00:42:18,640 --> 00:42:21,319
Speaker 3: begin with, and so I told myself, you know, even

901
00:42:21,640 --> 00:42:24,879
Speaker 3: as I'm building all of these different things, I'm making

902
00:42:24,920 --> 00:42:27,400
Speaker 3: sure that I build myself up and my kids up

903
00:42:27,560 --> 00:42:30,239
Speaker 3: to be the best they could possibly be, you know,

904
00:42:30,360 --> 00:42:32,239
Speaker 3: to make sure I can give them the values and

905
00:42:32,680 --> 00:42:34,880
Speaker 3: pour into them so they don't have a life that

906
00:42:35,000 --> 00:42:36,719
Speaker 3: I had where I had to try to figure out

907
00:42:36,880 --> 00:42:38,680
Speaker 3: certain things on my own. I'm going to make sure

908
00:42:38,800 --> 00:42:40,560
Speaker 3: Dad is there for them and they know I'm here,

909
00:42:41,080 --> 00:42:44,080
Speaker 3: and so I would have stayed in sacrificed regardless of

910
00:42:44,120 --> 00:42:46,320
Speaker 3: anything else. I think what ended up happening is and

911
00:42:46,440 --> 00:42:48,759
Speaker 3: this happens. I think the curses for a lot of

912
00:42:48,800 --> 00:42:53,439
Speaker 3: people women And I'm gonna say this, I'm controversial any rest.

913
00:42:55,080 --> 00:42:57,480
Speaker 3: I believe that what happens is is you get onto

914
00:42:57,560 --> 00:43:00,399
Speaker 3: these platforms and it's so much pressure. Because I felt

915
00:43:00,440 --> 00:43:02,239
Speaker 3: that Drew wouldn't have an issue because she was an

916
00:43:02,239 --> 00:43:05,160
Speaker 3: actress already. I'm like, all right, so you're used to this, right.

917
00:43:05,560 --> 00:43:08,200
Speaker 3: I feel like people lose them women who lose themselves

918
00:43:08,360 --> 00:43:10,640
Speaker 3: with reality TV a lot because all of a sudden,

919
00:43:10,719 --> 00:43:14,680
Speaker 3: they all of a sudden become these megastars overnight, and

920
00:43:14,760 --> 00:43:16,600
Speaker 3: how do you deal with it? What I would say

921
00:43:16,840 --> 00:43:20,080
Speaker 3: is from an actress perspective, I think the thing that

922
00:43:20,120 --> 00:43:23,479
Speaker 3: people don't realize is a pressure that comes with being

923
00:43:23,640 --> 00:43:28,040
Speaker 3: a housewife. Right. So, as a regular actress, you people

924
00:43:28,719 --> 00:43:31,480
Speaker 3: love you and they're around you because they're like, oh man,

925
00:43:31,600 --> 00:43:33,840
Speaker 3: this role right here, you get this. You mean so

926
00:43:34,000 --> 00:43:36,200
Speaker 3: much to me, This meant this. You can speak about

927
00:43:36,239 --> 00:43:39,520
Speaker 3: your passion nobody's prilicizing you about what you got on,

928
00:43:39,960 --> 00:43:42,480
Speaker 3: that your makeup isn't right, you know, you know, cure

929
00:43:42,520 --> 00:43:46,040
Speaker 3: yourself over your hair, like it's these all of these things.

930
00:43:46,200 --> 00:43:48,120
Speaker 3: And then all of a sudden you find yourself in

931
00:43:48,200 --> 00:43:50,480
Speaker 3: this position where every single year you got to elevate.

932
00:43:50,680 --> 00:43:52,239
Speaker 3: Oh I got to look better because they're going to

933
00:43:52,280 --> 00:43:54,040
Speaker 3: come after me. They're going to come after me. And

934
00:43:54,160 --> 00:43:56,160
Speaker 3: so you find people and I don't know if this

935
00:43:56,280 --> 00:43:59,279
Speaker 3: is on your franchise, but it's definitely on ours, where

936
00:44:00,160 --> 00:44:03,600
Speaker 3: everyone is trying to keep up with the Joneses and

937
00:44:03,880 --> 00:44:08,120
Speaker 3: become something. But becoming something means more money, and you

938
00:44:08,320 --> 00:44:11,200
Speaker 3: send all your money trying to give this look and

939
00:44:11,400 --> 00:44:13,040
Speaker 3: you don't have anything at the end of the day.

940
00:44:13,120 --> 00:44:15,600
Speaker 3: But you become a great star and you've got people

941
00:44:15,680 --> 00:44:18,799
Speaker 3: that's applauding you and like, yeah, girl, you this looks great.

942
00:44:19,000 --> 00:44:21,840
Speaker 3: Oh man, your fashions are great. You know, now this

943
00:44:22,600 --> 00:44:25,120
Speaker 3: is what you need to be doing. But that right there,

944
00:44:25,160 --> 00:44:28,279
Speaker 3: it comes with a huge financial strain. And once you

945
00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:31,640
Speaker 3: stop and once you stop looking at things the right way,

946
00:44:31,640 --> 00:44:36,279
Speaker 3: because this is what I would say business. Let's talk

947
00:44:36,320 --> 00:44:39,520
Speaker 3: business for a second. At some level, with all businesses

948
00:44:39,840 --> 00:44:42,800
Speaker 3: there's going to be costs and expensive that's associated with it.

949
00:44:42,880 --> 00:44:44,600
Speaker 3: You've got to get to a place where you kind

950
00:44:44,600 --> 00:44:47,440
Speaker 3: of get net neutral, where you can actually sustain your costs,

951
00:44:47,880 --> 00:44:49,680
Speaker 3: you know, and once you do that, because that's the

952
00:44:49,719 --> 00:44:51,799
Speaker 3: only way you're going to get into profitability. All right, Cool,

953
00:44:51,800 --> 00:44:53,920
Speaker 3: I've spent enough money here. We're gonna have to keep

954
00:44:53,960 --> 00:44:56,640
Speaker 3: what we currently have here because it's good enough, and

955
00:44:56,800 --> 00:44:59,600
Speaker 3: we're going to need to just focus on just building revenue.

956
00:45:00,160 --> 00:45:02,840
Speaker 3: If you don't have that access, then you're going to

957
00:45:02,920 --> 00:45:04,880
Speaker 3: kill yourself because there's no way to be able to

958
00:45:04,960 --> 00:45:07,000
Speaker 3: keep up. And so I believe that we kind of

959
00:45:07,040 --> 00:45:10,440
Speaker 3: got ourselves lost in that particular journey on top of

960
00:45:11,080 --> 00:45:12,960
Speaker 3: you know, the glitz, the glamour and that, you know,

961
00:45:13,160 --> 00:45:15,120
Speaker 3: and the different storylines. And I think so that I

962
00:45:15,160 --> 00:45:17,239
Speaker 3: think that's one big one. I think the other big

963
00:45:17,360 --> 00:45:23,560
Speaker 3: one for us was that I believe that the storyline, like,

964
00:45:23,719 --> 00:45:26,480
Speaker 3: for instance, if you come in and you're with the ships,

965
00:45:26,520 --> 00:45:28,879
Speaker 3: that's what I would call it, right, If you're gonna

966
00:45:28,880 --> 00:45:30,800
Speaker 3: be something, you got to be with the ships and

967
00:45:30,840 --> 00:45:35,400
Speaker 3: you gotta have fun with it, right. But like for instance,

968
00:45:35,480 --> 00:45:37,320
Speaker 3: if I'm gonna so Eddie, if I'm gonna make you

969
00:45:37,440 --> 00:45:39,000
Speaker 3: my if I'm going to tell you, hey, we're gonna

970
00:45:39,000 --> 00:45:41,239
Speaker 3: play good cop, bad cop, you're gonna be bad cop. Right,

971
00:45:41,920 --> 00:45:45,120
Speaker 3: And we're in a situation I can't you know, at

972
00:45:45,160 --> 00:45:46,719
Speaker 3: the end of the day, once you put your back

973
00:45:46,760 --> 00:45:49,640
Speaker 3: coop role, I can't keep you being bad you know,

974
00:45:49,800 --> 00:45:52,040
Speaker 3: I got to pull you back up. But man, Eddie

975
00:45:52,120 --> 00:45:54,160
Speaker 3: is good man. He did that. You know, we did that.

976
00:45:54,560 --> 00:45:56,439
Speaker 3: And now all of a sudden we played a game.

977
00:45:56,480 --> 00:45:58,960
Speaker 3: But I can't go and say Eddie, you know man, yeah,

978
00:45:59,280 --> 00:46:02,200
Speaker 3: like man Eddie was a straight asshole with us. I

979
00:46:02,239 --> 00:46:04,560
Speaker 3: can't be like, yeah, he did. I mean, he's terrible.

980
00:46:05,320 --> 00:46:07,600
Speaker 3: I can't because then all of a sudden the game,

981
00:46:07,680 --> 00:46:09,279
Speaker 3: we lose the game. Now all of a sudden, you're

982
00:46:09,280 --> 00:46:10,800
Speaker 3: looking at it like, wait a minute, I did this

983
00:46:10,920 --> 00:46:13,919
Speaker 3: for you. There is something for you, right, you can't

984
00:46:14,080 --> 00:46:16,240
Speaker 3: leave you in that position. I think in our case,

985
00:46:16,680 --> 00:46:19,719
Speaker 3: it was like I played the role of the bad

986
00:46:20,200 --> 00:46:22,680
Speaker 3: you know, the bad boy, whatever it is. I was

987
00:46:22,719 --> 00:46:25,920
Speaker 3: the villain. But you can villainize me forever. You got

988
00:46:26,040 --> 00:46:28,120
Speaker 3: to also pull me up. And so that's the things

989
00:46:28,200 --> 00:46:29,680
Speaker 3: of humanizing me, right.

990
00:46:29,760 --> 00:46:29,960
Speaker 2: Yeah.

991
00:46:30,000 --> 00:46:32,560
Speaker 3: I think what happens is if a woman makes you

992
00:46:32,680 --> 00:46:35,080
Speaker 3: being really bad, then you're going to be bad and

993
00:46:35,160 --> 00:46:36,960
Speaker 3: there's nothing you can do. The show is not about us.

994
00:46:37,120 --> 00:46:39,200
Speaker 3: You don't really have a chance to see who you

995
00:46:39,320 --> 00:46:41,759
Speaker 3: really are. They don't know, you know what I'm saying

996
00:46:41,880 --> 00:46:43,920
Speaker 3: when they don't know that you're over here cooking breakfast

997
00:46:44,000 --> 00:46:46,360
Speaker 3: and you're doing all these great things, you know, and

998
00:46:46,480 --> 00:46:49,719
Speaker 3: you're being this charming person, you know, this charming man,

999
00:46:50,360 --> 00:46:52,680
Speaker 3: because the cameras aren't there, and even if they are there,

1000
00:46:52,719 --> 00:46:55,640
Speaker 3: they won't show it because that doesn't fit the storyline

1001
00:46:55,680 --> 00:46:58,439
Speaker 3: that they're trying to show. So you need the woman

1002
00:46:58,520 --> 00:47:00,719
Speaker 3: to bring you up or to make you neutral. I

1003
00:47:00,760 --> 00:47:03,359
Speaker 3: think Cynthia Bailey for my show, she did a really

1004
00:47:03,400 --> 00:47:06,000
Speaker 3: good job of just making sure that she can at

1005
00:47:06,080 --> 00:47:09,120
Speaker 3: least humanize people and not be, you know, not be

1006
00:47:09,239 --> 00:47:11,440
Speaker 3: this big victim. But you know, at the end of

1007
00:47:11,480 --> 00:47:15,040
Speaker 3: the day, it's a journey you kind of go through it.

1008
00:47:15,760 --> 00:47:18,120
Speaker 3: I learned a lot, i would say, and I learned

1009
00:47:18,320 --> 00:47:24,040
Speaker 3: that people don't care, you know, like people don't hear

1010
00:47:24,600 --> 00:47:27,480
Speaker 3: about who you are and what you show up as.

1011
00:47:27,600 --> 00:47:30,920
Speaker 3: It's only a real small community that really truly do

1012
00:47:31,080 --> 00:47:32,160
Speaker 3: want to get to know you, and a lot of

1013
00:47:32,160 --> 00:47:34,799
Speaker 3: them are your family. You know, even friends can turn

1014
00:47:34,800 --> 00:47:37,560
Speaker 3: against you because they're like, look at this headline. You

1015
00:47:37,719 --> 00:47:40,520
Speaker 3: did this, You're trying to take her business. I'm like,

1016
00:47:40,920 --> 00:47:44,400
Speaker 3: I am the business. What are you talking about? This

1017
00:47:44,600 --> 00:47:47,080
Speaker 3: is there's all my money? What a he's talking about here?

1018
00:47:47,160 --> 00:47:50,239
Speaker 3: You know, even when it comes out of this house.

1019
00:47:50,320 --> 00:47:53,080
Speaker 3: So you've mentioned even the beat in a basement. It's

1020
00:47:53,120 --> 00:47:55,200
Speaker 3: a double edged sword. You're damned if you do, damned

1021
00:47:55,239 --> 00:47:57,960
Speaker 3: if you don't. If you leave the house all of

1022
00:47:58,040 --> 00:48:01,439
Speaker 3: a sudden, you abandon the kids. When you lose the kids, yeah,

1023
00:48:01,719 --> 00:48:04,680
Speaker 3: if you say you're a sick they can't afford to

1024
00:48:04,760 --> 00:48:07,440
Speaker 3: go and live on your own. I'm like, oh, so

1025
00:48:07,800 --> 00:48:09,480
Speaker 3: it's like, nah, I guess I'm gonna just have to

1026
00:48:09,520 --> 00:48:11,400
Speaker 3: take it. I love my kids. I want to make

1027
00:48:11,440 --> 00:48:13,240
Speaker 3: sure I'm here with them. I'm not going to lose

1028
00:48:13,400 --> 00:48:16,200
Speaker 3: the relationship with them. They have to fight like hell

1029
00:48:16,360 --> 00:48:19,200
Speaker 3: because it's a money game in the courts. To try

1030
00:48:19,239 --> 00:48:21,759
Speaker 3: to really get, you know, have access to your kids.

1031
00:48:22,360 --> 00:48:25,080
Speaker 3: You have to prove yourself. But leaving is the worst

1032
00:48:25,120 --> 00:48:28,560
Speaker 3: thing you can do because you pretty much give up

1033
00:48:28,600 --> 00:48:29,640
Speaker 3: your right to your kids.

1034
00:48:30,280 --> 00:48:34,000
Speaker 1: And at the end of the day, Ralph, what people

1035
00:48:34,120 --> 00:48:36,880
Speaker 1: don't realize that watch the show, is that we are

1036
00:48:37,000 --> 00:48:39,759
Speaker 1: real people. We're going to make decisions based on our

1037
00:48:41,440 --> 00:48:45,120
Speaker 1: you know, ability to survive this situation in our lifetime.

1038
00:48:45,239 --> 00:48:48,160
Speaker 1: So when you have to stay in the same household,

1039
00:48:48,880 --> 00:48:52,360
Speaker 1: who gives a fuck? And nobody should ever care or

1040
00:48:52,560 --> 00:48:54,839
Speaker 1: have to know the truth? This is your real life

1041
00:48:54,880 --> 00:48:58,000
Speaker 1: and you're going through it, and it's somewhat private, you know,

1042
00:48:58,120 --> 00:49:02,080
Speaker 1: but because you're a public person, you can't blink without

1043
00:49:02,200 --> 00:49:04,920
Speaker 1: you know, the fucking story coming out. So oh, your

1044
00:49:04,960 --> 00:49:07,440
Speaker 1: eye wasn't dark enough or you didn't blink fast enough.

1045
00:49:07,560 --> 00:49:10,040
Speaker 1: You know, It's just I get it. We signed up

1046
00:49:10,080 --> 00:49:12,880
Speaker 1: for that. But when it comes to the reality of

1047
00:49:13,000 --> 00:49:15,840
Speaker 1: our world, if you have to, you know, live in

1048
00:49:15,920 --> 00:49:17,600
Speaker 1: the same house for as long as you have to,

1049
00:49:18,480 --> 00:49:21,640
Speaker 1: who cares with people? There's so many, so many judgments

1050
00:49:21,680 --> 00:49:23,920
Speaker 1: that are going to come at you because of whatever

1051
00:49:24,080 --> 00:49:27,520
Speaker 1: decision you make. But just stay true to yourself and

1052
00:49:27,800 --> 00:49:32,720
Speaker 1: understand that nobody, like you said, nobody cares the true outcome,

1053
00:49:32,800 --> 00:49:36,839
Speaker 1: the end result. Only you do. And as long as

1054
00:49:36,880 --> 00:49:39,839
Speaker 1: you feel good about what you're doing, that's all that matters. Really,

1055
00:49:39,880 --> 00:49:42,560
Speaker 1: It's all that matters, not what the audience thinks. And

1056
00:49:42,680 --> 00:49:45,080
Speaker 1: I think You're right, some of the women do get

1057
00:49:45,200 --> 00:49:48,160
Speaker 1: kind of caught up with that one of my biggest

1058
00:49:48,160 --> 00:49:50,239
Speaker 1: problems on our franchise, and I don't know if it's

1059
00:49:50,600 --> 00:49:54,480
Speaker 1: also across all the other franchises, but it's the fakeness,

1060
00:49:55,160 --> 00:49:57,600
Speaker 1: you know, when they come up with fake storylines. And

1061
00:49:57,680 --> 00:50:00,919
Speaker 1: I learned something really interesting yesterday. I was on Jeff

1062
00:50:01,000 --> 00:50:06,040
Speaker 1: Lewis radio show and he said something about how important

1063
00:50:06,160 --> 00:50:09,960
Speaker 1: it is when you're a housewife coming onto the Housewife

1064
00:50:10,080 --> 00:50:14,480
Speaker 1: Network or show world that if you were, you know,

1065
00:50:14,600 --> 00:50:17,640
Speaker 1: a secretary at a law firm when you got cast,

1066
00:50:18,000 --> 00:50:21,000
Speaker 1: then you stay a secretary at a law firm and

1067
00:50:21,200 --> 00:50:25,240
Speaker 1: continue that as your life, as your career. Just because

1068
00:50:25,280 --> 00:50:27,360
Speaker 1: you're getting paid good amount of money being on the

1069
00:50:27,440 --> 00:50:30,080
Speaker 1: show doesn't mean you have to quit what you're doing,

1070
00:50:30,200 --> 00:50:32,640
Speaker 1: because then your story goes out the window and now

1071
00:50:32,760 --> 00:50:34,920
Speaker 1: you're kind of fumbling, like I got to make some

1072
00:50:35,000 --> 00:50:36,840
Speaker 1: shit up so I can be interesting, because all I

1073
00:50:36,880 --> 00:50:40,279
Speaker 1: got going is I'm a housewife, paid housewife, and that's

1074
00:50:40,360 --> 00:50:45,920
Speaker 1: that interesting. So that that was a really interesting point

1075
00:50:46,000 --> 00:50:50,280
Speaker 1: that Jeff made yesterday, and I learned something new about

1076
00:50:50,719 --> 00:50:52,719
Speaker 1: this whole journey all the time, you know, And I

1077
00:50:52,760 --> 00:50:54,560
Speaker 1: think that's one of the reasons why I enjoy talking

1078
00:50:54,600 --> 00:50:57,560
Speaker 1: to you guys. I mean, at least the good guys

1079
00:50:57,600 --> 00:51:00,680
Speaker 1: on the show. I'm not to talk to all the

1080
00:51:00,719 --> 00:51:03,760
Speaker 1: criminals that have been on the show yet, that is funny.

1081
00:51:13,280 --> 00:51:17,800
Speaker 2: So, Ralph, do you ultimately think that the show caused

1082
00:51:17,800 --> 00:51:18,280
Speaker 2: the divorce?

1083
00:51:19,880 --> 00:51:20,080
Speaker 3: Yeah?

1084
00:51:21,560 --> 00:51:26,000
Speaker 5: I think it's what. I think it's what cracked the

1085
00:51:26,120 --> 00:51:30,919
Speaker 5: door open, you know. And I think we were probably

1086
00:51:30,960 --> 00:51:34,000
Speaker 5: at a place where we perfect, you know what, you

1087
00:51:34,120 --> 00:51:38,640
Speaker 5: know what interesting enough, this is something interesting that juwe

1088
00:51:38,680 --> 00:51:40,959
Speaker 5: told me. She was just like, well, Ralph, I brought

1089
00:51:41,000 --> 00:51:43,560
Speaker 5: I talked about real problems that we were already dealing with,

1090
00:51:44,320 --> 00:51:46,000
Speaker 5: and I just didn't know.

1091
00:51:46,040 --> 00:51:49,800
Speaker 3: Those problems existed, you know. So and so it was like,

1092
00:51:49,960 --> 00:51:52,239
Speaker 3: why would you bring me on on television to talk

1093
00:51:52,280 --> 00:51:55,239
Speaker 3: to me about something if it's a real thing. I mean,

1094
00:51:55,280 --> 00:51:57,080
Speaker 3: this is the worst place to do it, because I

1095
00:51:57,280 --> 00:52:00,799
Speaker 3: don't believe you said in a second right. People bring

1096
00:52:00,920 --> 00:52:02,399
Speaker 3: up fake storylines all the time.

1097
00:52:02,480 --> 00:52:03,480
Speaker 2: I know what it is.

1098
00:52:03,640 --> 00:52:07,279
Speaker 3: It's entertainment. It's not the news, you know. So you're

1099
00:52:07,360 --> 00:52:10,080
Speaker 3: doing entertainment. You want to show glimpses of real life,

1100
00:52:10,160 --> 00:52:13,000
Speaker 3: but also you're going to really make focus on making

1101
00:52:13,080 --> 00:52:18,160
Speaker 3: great TV yeah, so so, but I think going through

1102
00:52:18,320 --> 00:52:21,359
Speaker 3: this it really cracked the door, you know, to where

1103
00:52:21,560 --> 00:52:25,840
Speaker 3: things just started becoming exposed and it just became too challenging.

1104
00:52:25,960 --> 00:52:28,320
Speaker 3: So I would say yes because I would have definitely

1105
00:52:28,520 --> 00:52:31,239
Speaker 3: guaranteed I would have stayed in my marriage just for

1106
00:52:31,320 --> 00:52:34,480
Speaker 3: the simple fact, you know, I wanted to make sure

1107
00:52:34,560 --> 00:52:37,120
Speaker 3: I'm in my kid's life, and we would have just

1108
00:52:37,239 --> 00:52:39,840
Speaker 3: figured it out. I've done it several times over. You know,

1109
00:52:40,080 --> 00:52:42,480
Speaker 3: I could have left a long long time ago. I

1110
00:52:42,600 --> 00:52:45,000
Speaker 3: chose to say, so I would say I would say

1111
00:52:45,160 --> 00:52:51,360
Speaker 3: yes to definitely that this show impacted our relationship, how

1112
00:52:51,400 --> 00:52:51,680
Speaker 3: about you?

1113
00:52:52,560 --> 00:52:55,720
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, you know it's interesting that you mentioned

1114
00:52:56,200 --> 00:53:00,200
Speaker 2: I mean communication, right. I also had no idea that

1115
00:53:00,600 --> 00:53:02,319
Speaker 2: and Teddy has said this as well, so I can

1116
00:53:02,360 --> 00:53:04,840
Speaker 2: say it. I had no idea our relationship was in

1117
00:53:04,880 --> 00:53:07,279
Speaker 2: a bad place. I thought we were in a great place.

1118
00:53:08,120 --> 00:53:11,800
Speaker 2: But she just never communicated that to me. So that

1119
00:53:12,000 --> 00:53:14,320
Speaker 2: part I was surprised with, which again it sounds like

1120
00:53:14,360 --> 00:53:16,600
Speaker 2: that's what you said as well, right where you were

1121
00:53:16,680 --> 00:53:18,360
Speaker 2: sort of surprised that you didn't really know there was

1122
00:53:18,440 --> 00:53:18,920
Speaker 2: some issues.

1123
00:53:19,800 --> 00:53:22,799
Speaker 3: But the thing about it is is that you know, yeah,

1124
00:53:23,040 --> 00:53:25,920
Speaker 3: that part but on TV, she makes it this big thing.

1125
00:53:26,040 --> 00:53:28,840
Speaker 3: But in private, it's like, oh, Ralph, I love you.

1126
00:53:29,280 --> 00:53:33,719
Speaker 3: You know, everything's and so it's weird. I'm like, which

1127
00:53:33,800 --> 00:53:34,960
Speaker 3: one are you here? You know?

1128
00:53:37,040 --> 00:53:39,719
Speaker 1: Is a different when the cameras are around, they have

1129
00:53:40,200 --> 00:53:41,960
Speaker 1: pers That's my.

1130
00:53:42,000 --> 00:53:45,680
Speaker 3: Big problem, you know, It's like it's continuity. It's continuity.

1131
00:53:45,760 --> 00:53:48,160
Speaker 3: I got to take you where people last saw you,

1132
00:53:48,760 --> 00:53:50,719
Speaker 3: and I'm like, forget about what they lost. Tell me

1133
00:53:50,760 --> 00:53:53,040
Speaker 3: this is reality. We're going to just how about we

1134
00:53:53,239 --> 00:53:56,200
Speaker 3: just live in today, you know, and the present into

1135
00:53:56,400 --> 00:53:58,759
Speaker 3: who we are today and treat me the way you

1136
00:53:58,760 --> 00:54:00,920
Speaker 3: would treat me today when it can are off, not

1137
00:54:01,080 --> 00:54:03,960
Speaker 3: when they're on. And so we I have a problem

1138
00:54:04,000 --> 00:54:05,920
Speaker 3: with it because I feel like it's not real. Our

1139
00:54:06,000 --> 00:54:09,719
Speaker 3: story isn't real for us and to us, and it's

1140
00:54:10,000 --> 00:54:12,040
Speaker 3: not showing who we you know, who you really are,

1141
00:54:12,160 --> 00:54:13,360
Speaker 3: because it's.

1142
00:54:13,239 --> 00:54:17,440
Speaker 1: Like I don't I don't think you honestly, to hit

1143
00:54:17,520 --> 00:54:20,960
Speaker 1: on your point, Ralph, I don't think normal people have

1144
00:54:21,480 --> 00:54:25,120
Speaker 1: real stories that are interesting. We're just normal fucking people.

1145
00:54:25,880 --> 00:54:29,880
Speaker 1: But we got some really smart producers and editors that

1146
00:54:30,200 --> 00:54:33,800
Speaker 1: create this storyline right the storyline editor, and they create

1147
00:54:33,880 --> 00:54:36,399
Speaker 1: this pretty amazing show that's been going on for twenty years.

1148
00:54:36,440 --> 00:54:40,319
Speaker 1: So I got to give them the credit for being

1149
00:54:40,480 --> 00:54:44,800
Speaker 1: so creative and so successful with putting you know, boring

1150
00:54:45,719 --> 00:54:49,800
Speaker 1: non acting you know, trained people on TV and making

1151
00:54:49,840 --> 00:54:53,080
Speaker 1: a huge success out of it. Right, We're just normal

1152
00:54:53,200 --> 00:54:56,200
Speaker 1: people and we're not trained actors, and I don't know

1153
00:54:56,280 --> 00:54:58,319
Speaker 1: how to use all my levels of voices and face,

1154
00:54:58,360 --> 00:55:00,400
Speaker 1: show lip, you know, and all kinds of skills that

1155
00:55:00,680 --> 00:55:05,040
Speaker 1: real acting people get, you know. So we're just making

1156
00:55:05,120 --> 00:55:07,799
Speaker 1: it up as we go, and we're doing life as

1157
00:55:07,880 --> 00:55:10,480
Speaker 1: we go. So you know that, I got to give

1158
00:55:10,480 --> 00:55:13,319
Speaker 1: them credit for putting together such an awesome successful show

1159
00:55:13,800 --> 00:55:15,040
Speaker 1: for almost twenty years now.

1160
00:55:16,560 --> 00:55:19,120
Speaker 3: Agreed, I definitely agree. Definitely couldn't agree with some more

1161
00:55:19,160 --> 00:55:19,520
Speaker 3: on that one.

1162
00:55:19,920 --> 00:55:25,320
Speaker 1: What was the tipping point with the decision to get divorced?

1163
00:55:25,560 --> 00:55:30,479
Speaker 1: Like what happened that caused either you or her to file?

1164
00:55:30,640 --> 00:55:30,680
Speaker 3: Like?

1165
00:55:31,040 --> 00:55:32,200
Speaker 1: What was the catalyst?

1166
00:55:33,280 --> 00:55:34,000
Speaker 3: It was an affair?

1167
00:55:34,600 --> 00:55:35,400
Speaker 1: Oh, it wasn't affair.

1168
00:55:35,400 --> 00:55:39,279
Speaker 3: Okay, it was an affair? And was it you you

1169
00:55:39,360 --> 00:55:40,760
Speaker 3: know what? Actually?

1170
00:55:41,360 --> 00:55:41,480
Speaker 1: Oh?

1171
00:55:41,520 --> 00:55:45,160
Speaker 3: Okay? But do you know the funny thing is so

1172
00:55:46,640 --> 00:55:48,480
Speaker 3: a couple of all the things that I learned, right,

1173
00:55:48,640 --> 00:55:50,520
Speaker 3: because you know, of course this is my first marriage.

1174
00:55:50,520 --> 00:55:53,440
Speaker 3: I haven't been through this journey before. So I thought

1175
00:55:53,480 --> 00:55:55,919
Speaker 3: that people were just going to have a conversation, like look,

1176
00:55:56,080 --> 00:55:59,200
Speaker 3: so what I did was, you know, it was a Saturday,

1177
00:55:59,320 --> 00:56:01,440
Speaker 3: and how they look need to have a conversation. This

1178
00:56:01,640 --> 00:56:03,000
Speaker 3: is what I want to do.

1179
00:56:03,480 --> 00:56:03,640
Speaker 2: You know.

1180
00:56:03,840 --> 00:56:06,360
Speaker 3: I think we should go to Cecha ways YadA, you know,

1181
00:56:06,400 --> 00:56:08,080
Speaker 3: and I want to file. I'm going to file for divorce.

1182
00:56:08,719 --> 00:56:11,279
Speaker 3: And so you know, she's like, all, that's what you

1183
00:56:11,360 --> 00:56:15,400
Speaker 3: want to do. And so we had that conversation on Saturday.

1184
00:56:15,560 --> 00:56:20,840
Speaker 3: On Monday, basically her when we went and tried to

1185
00:56:20,880 --> 00:56:22,879
Speaker 3: go and FIU. So it was like a race. That's

1186
00:56:22,920 --> 00:56:25,759
Speaker 3: another thing I like. On TV, we just became a

1187
00:56:25,880 --> 00:56:30,799
Speaker 3: fit show because I can laugh about it, like, let

1188
00:56:30,840 --> 00:56:32,799
Speaker 3: me see, let me say this, right, We've been going

1189
00:56:32,840 --> 00:56:34,640
Speaker 3: through this divorce for two and a half years. I

1190
00:56:34,800 --> 00:56:36,839
Speaker 3: just some of this stuff I just gotta just now

1191
00:56:37,000 --> 00:56:39,440
Speaker 3: laugh about because I'm like, this is happened and a

1192
00:56:39,440 --> 00:56:43,200
Speaker 3: half the same. But on national television, they started making

1193
00:56:43,280 --> 00:56:46,840
Speaker 3: these different cartoons about us racing to the court house

1194
00:56:46,880 --> 00:56:50,920
Speaker 3: to go and foul and Drew one because literally Drew filed.

1195
00:56:51,880 --> 00:56:54,520
Speaker 3: Drew's attorney found mind. I had the conversation with her,

1196
00:56:54,760 --> 00:56:57,960
Speaker 3: but her attorney was able to submit her information I

1197
00:56:58,040 --> 00:57:02,759
Speaker 3: think like an hour before my So it looks like

1198
00:57:02,840 --> 00:57:04,960
Speaker 3: we both found them the same day, hers winning first,

1199
00:57:05,040 --> 00:57:08,120
Speaker 3: and so it was absolutely just insane. So I'm like,

1200
00:57:08,560 --> 00:57:11,239
Speaker 3: here we go. So that's a notice for all we've

1201
00:57:11,280 --> 00:57:14,359
Speaker 3: been watching. You can't go and give notice, just going

1202
00:57:14,440 --> 00:57:15,200
Speaker 3: to get it done.

1203
00:57:15,560 --> 00:57:24,880
Speaker 2: By the way, Ralph, very similar situation, same, very simple.

1204
00:57:25,720 --> 00:57:30,040
Speaker 1: I think when you have TV experience or media experience, there's.

1205
00:57:29,800 --> 00:57:31,640
Speaker 2: A rookies on that one, Ralph.

1206
00:57:31,960 --> 00:57:34,680
Speaker 1: The first one, the first one to file, is going

1207
00:57:34,760 --> 00:57:37,040
Speaker 1: to get the story out there, so which means the

1208
00:57:37,120 --> 00:57:40,480
Speaker 1: first story out is going to stick. It's what happens

1209
00:57:40,520 --> 00:57:43,120
Speaker 1: after that that nobody cares about. It's this first story.

1210
00:57:43,240 --> 00:57:46,840
Speaker 1: So I think that's the whole, you know, purpose behind

1211
00:57:46,880 --> 00:57:49,120
Speaker 1: filing first. At the end of the day, though it's

1212
00:57:49,160 --> 00:57:49,959
Speaker 1: the same ship show.

1213
00:57:51,560 --> 00:57:52,720
Speaker 3: I'm gonna agree with you more on that.

1214
00:57:53,040 --> 00:57:56,080
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, I'm sorry to hear that you're going through that.

1215
00:57:57,160 --> 00:57:59,720
Speaker 1: Would you say that you're on the other end of

1216
00:57:59,800 --> 00:58:03,400
Speaker 1: it or you're still in the you know, muddy, sickening

1217
00:58:03,600 --> 00:58:04,440
Speaker 1: side of divorce.

1218
00:58:05,440 --> 00:58:10,040
Speaker 3: Well, I'm still in the basement, Kam. But but I

1219
00:58:10,120 --> 00:58:12,600
Speaker 3: think the reality of it is, you know, I think

1220
00:58:12,680 --> 00:58:15,919
Speaker 3: you go you go through these phases right first you're hurt.

1221
00:58:16,680 --> 00:58:20,240
Speaker 3: Then you're going through and you become angry and you know,

1222
00:58:20,880 --> 00:58:23,200
Speaker 3: and then after a while you get to a place

1223
00:58:23,320 --> 00:58:27,400
Speaker 3: to where you know everything that you do, everything you

1224
00:58:27,440 --> 00:58:30,120
Speaker 3: can say because you know, of course it's a big fight.

1225
00:58:30,640 --> 00:58:32,840
Speaker 3: You said this, you said this, This is my narrative.

1226
00:58:32,840 --> 00:58:34,840
Speaker 3: And I feel like, as men, and when I know

1227
00:58:35,000 --> 00:58:37,920
Speaker 3: you can probably agree with this, we're fighting for our

1228
00:58:38,120 --> 00:58:40,640
Speaker 3: voice of say you know what the actual truth is.

1229
00:58:40,720 --> 00:58:43,000
Speaker 3: Because now people are looking at you like it's you,

1230
00:58:43,240 --> 00:58:46,520
Speaker 3: you did this, it's your fault. Everybody points the finger,

1231
00:58:46,560 --> 00:58:50,160
Speaker 3: everybody chooses a side. And so for me, I ended

1232
00:58:50,240 --> 00:58:52,160
Speaker 3: up getting to a place i't even think in a

1233
00:58:52,240 --> 00:58:55,560
Speaker 3: podcast you know called ralph an Abasement, and ralph an

1234
00:58:55,600 --> 00:58:58,960
Speaker 3: Abasement was to basically tell my own narrative because I

1235
00:58:59,040 --> 00:59:01,200
Speaker 3: couldn't rely on anyone else and keep in the show

1236
00:59:01,240 --> 00:59:03,520
Speaker 3: to tell my narrative because they don't really care about me.

1237
00:59:03,720 --> 00:59:06,600
Speaker 3: I'm not the housewife, you know, and so which I

1238
00:59:06,680 --> 00:59:10,960
Speaker 3: do appreciate the network for actually you know, definitely supporting

1239
00:59:11,080 --> 00:59:13,320
Speaker 3: me and you know, allowing me to tell the piece

1240
00:59:13,360 --> 00:59:15,640
Speaker 3: that I did. I feel like I can always have more,

1241
00:59:15,880 --> 00:59:18,840
Speaker 3: you know, of course show and humanize me and show

1242
00:59:18,920 --> 00:59:21,440
Speaker 3: who I really am. But they they did it, they

1243
00:59:21,480 --> 00:59:23,200
Speaker 3: did they did a lot for me. I mean, I

1244
00:59:23,240 --> 00:59:27,440
Speaker 3: can say that, and then you get to a place

1245
00:59:27,520 --> 00:59:29,920
Speaker 3: where it's just like, hey, you know what, this probably

1246
00:59:30,000 --> 00:59:33,880
Speaker 3: doesn't really matter as much, you know, And so I

1247
00:59:33,960 --> 00:59:37,120
Speaker 3: look at my kids and I kind of now finally

1248
00:59:37,200 --> 00:59:39,720
Speaker 3: have broken out of the angry, bitter stage or whatever

1249
00:59:39,800 --> 00:59:41,440
Speaker 3: like that. I ended up creating a song. But I

1250
00:59:41,560 --> 00:59:44,400
Speaker 3: wish you well. You just launched that, right, I've just

1251
00:59:44,560 --> 00:59:46,600
Speaker 3: lost that. I just launched it. So it's available on

1252
00:59:46,720 --> 00:59:50,000
Speaker 3: all platforms, by the way. But wish you Well is

1253
00:59:50,120 --> 00:59:52,720
Speaker 3: I think it's an alternate song just to say, hey, look,

1254
00:59:52,880 --> 00:59:54,960
Speaker 3: I don't care about what narratives you say. I don't

1255
00:59:55,000 --> 00:59:58,000
Speaker 3: care about if you lie about me, you do anything,

1256
00:59:58,280 --> 01:00:02,200
Speaker 3: you bad mouth me. You you know, at the end

1257
01:00:02,200 --> 01:00:04,400
Speaker 3: of the day, I wish you well. And it's something

1258
01:00:04,440 --> 01:00:06,040
Speaker 3: that I can go and put out there and have

1259
01:00:06,160 --> 01:00:08,600
Speaker 3: a smile on my face. I think I'm gonna talk

1260
01:00:08,640 --> 01:00:10,160
Speaker 3: about myself, but I don't know if you guys can

1261
01:00:10,200 --> 01:00:14,600
Speaker 3: relate to it. The for men when we're emotional or

1262
01:00:14,680 --> 01:00:16,960
Speaker 3: for myself when I'm emotional. That means I care you

1263
01:00:17,080 --> 01:00:19,800
Speaker 3: got it. But when I stopped caring, I just put

1264
01:00:19,840 --> 01:00:21,840
Speaker 3: a smile off face and I'm like, yeah, you know

1265
01:00:21,920 --> 01:00:25,560
Speaker 3: what I wish you well, yeah, you know, I'm a

1266
01:00:25,640 --> 01:00:27,439
Speaker 3: focus on me. I know, I got a lot of healing.

1267
01:00:27,520 --> 01:00:30,840
Speaker 3: You do, and I do because you know, even getting

1268
01:00:30,880 --> 01:00:33,919
Speaker 3: out there, so some things I got to break myself down.

1269
01:00:34,000 --> 01:00:35,920
Speaker 3: It's a lot of things. You also realize that you

1270
01:00:36,040 --> 01:00:38,880
Speaker 3: did wrong. On your side. I could have done this better,

1271
01:00:39,000 --> 01:00:41,360
Speaker 3: you know. You know, I sailed in this area, you know,

1272
01:00:41,840 --> 01:00:43,920
Speaker 3: And I also recognized the area that where I probably

1273
01:00:43,920 --> 01:00:45,920
Speaker 3: could have treated you better or given her the things

1274
01:00:46,000 --> 01:00:49,960
Speaker 3: that she may have wanted at the time, but they

1275
01:00:50,000 --> 01:00:52,240
Speaker 3: didn't I didn't care about it as much because they

1276
01:00:52,280 --> 01:00:54,400
Speaker 3: didn't fit into the grand scheme of things from a

1277
01:00:54,480 --> 01:00:58,840
Speaker 3: business perspective, you know. But these are things that from

1278
01:00:58,840 --> 01:01:01,360
Speaker 3: an emotional perspective that she felt like she might have needed.

1279
01:01:01,560 --> 01:01:03,000
Speaker 3: I don't know whether or not that would have probably

1280
01:01:03,080 --> 01:01:06,560
Speaker 3: prevented anything from being the outcome, but they're a thing

1281
01:01:06,640 --> 01:01:10,040
Speaker 3: that I need to learn for myselves because my next relationship,

1282
01:01:10,440 --> 01:01:12,240
Speaker 3: it's going to matter then. And you know, and I

1283
01:01:12,280 --> 01:01:13,760
Speaker 3: have a daughter that I'm raising and I want to

1284
01:01:13,800 --> 01:01:17,880
Speaker 3: make sure that she also understands certain dynamics around how

1285
01:01:17,960 --> 01:01:19,560
Speaker 3: and I can teach and be like, hey, you know what,

1286
01:01:19,760 --> 01:01:22,080
Speaker 3: this is where dad made a mistake. This is something

1287
01:01:22,160 --> 01:01:24,640
Speaker 3: that I get wrong and be able to learn from

1288
01:01:24,680 --> 01:01:27,240
Speaker 3: my mistakes and be able to grow, because I think

1289
01:01:27,320 --> 01:01:29,520
Speaker 3: that's a big thing. We can't take scars with us.

1290
01:01:29,560 --> 01:01:31,880
Speaker 3: We as men, we need to heal, you know, we

1291
01:01:31,920 --> 01:01:34,320
Speaker 3: need to give ourselves grace to allow ourselves to be

1292
01:01:34,360 --> 01:01:36,360
Speaker 3: able to do that, because sometimes we do.

1293
01:01:36,560 --> 01:01:37,160
Speaker 2: We do break.

1294
01:01:37,640 --> 01:01:40,680
Speaker 3: Men commit suicide the most out of anybody in divorce.

1295
01:01:41,000 --> 01:01:42,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, that can do.

1296
01:01:50,720 --> 01:01:52,640
Speaker 2: What would be that thing that, if you can go

1297
01:01:52,760 --> 01:01:54,720
Speaker 2: back to you would change. I'm curious.

1298
01:01:56,120 --> 01:01:58,560
Speaker 3: What would I change. I probably would have taken more

1299
01:01:58,640 --> 01:02:00,960
Speaker 3: time to go and take her out on dates and stuff,

1300
01:02:01,120 --> 01:02:03,400
Speaker 3: just to make sure that she knew that I appreciated

1301
01:02:03,520 --> 01:02:06,360
Speaker 3: and loved her. You know, I think I was so

1302
01:02:06,520 --> 01:02:10,360
Speaker 3: focused on getting money and driving forward, like all right,

1303
01:02:10,400 --> 01:02:14,080
Speaker 3: we got these opportunities, and I saw a short window opportunity.

1304
01:02:14,120 --> 01:02:16,280
Speaker 3: I'm like, all right, this show my man next year.

1305
01:02:16,480 --> 01:02:18,840
Speaker 3: So what can we get done? You know, there's continue

1306
01:02:18,880 --> 01:02:21,080
Speaker 3: to drive this thing because if we're making X, this

1307
01:02:21,240 --> 01:02:23,080
Speaker 3: is what we can do. The reality of it is,

1308
01:02:23,120 --> 01:02:25,080
Speaker 3: this platform is great because you can actually be able

1309
01:02:25,080 --> 01:02:28,280
Speaker 3: to scale a business ten times faster if you use

1310
01:02:28,320 --> 01:02:31,920
Speaker 3: the platform the right way. You know, it's really possible,

1311
01:02:32,920 --> 01:02:35,040
Speaker 3: but you need to make sure it's done correctly. And

1312
01:02:35,160 --> 01:02:38,240
Speaker 3: so that's where my focus was opposed to going out

1313
01:02:38,320 --> 01:02:41,640
Speaker 3: and just making sure that we were together and we

1314
01:02:41,880 --> 01:02:45,000
Speaker 3: were on the same page. And I feel like if

1315
01:02:45,320 --> 01:02:49,000
Speaker 3: especially being on television, because now we're kind of we're

1316
01:02:49,080 --> 01:02:53,120
Speaker 3: now celebrities, right, We're all very very well known and

1317
01:02:53,280 --> 01:02:56,880
Speaker 3: very popular for good or bad. But I think if

1318
01:02:56,920 --> 01:02:59,920
Speaker 3: we were able to actually sit down and make sure

1319
01:03:00,160 --> 01:03:03,600
Speaker 3: that we were unified and we would have probably been

1320
01:03:03,600 --> 01:03:06,320
Speaker 3: able to allow no one to come between us, because

1321
01:03:06,480 --> 01:03:09,200
Speaker 3: I believe a big part of also our demise is

1322
01:03:09,840 --> 01:03:12,440
Speaker 3: so many. You got so many different voices coming into

1323
01:03:12,520 --> 01:03:14,880
Speaker 3: your head. Who should you listen to? Who has the

1324
01:03:14,960 --> 01:03:17,320
Speaker 3: right thing? And all of a sudden, you got the producers,

1325
01:03:17,360 --> 01:03:19,120
Speaker 3: you got the friends, you got the fans, you have

1326
01:03:19,840 --> 01:03:24,200
Speaker 3: makeup artists, their scholars, you know, your mother, your auntie,

1327
01:03:24,480 --> 01:03:27,800
Speaker 3: and you got so many different voices. How do you

1328
01:03:27,960 --> 01:03:30,680
Speaker 3: make sure that you can still hear your wife's voice

1329
01:03:30,760 --> 01:03:33,520
Speaker 3: and your husband's voice so that you guys are the

1330
01:03:33,640 --> 01:03:34,960
Speaker 3: only ones in a room and you can be able

1331
01:03:34,960 --> 01:03:37,960
Speaker 3: to silence the noise. I would say that we failed

1332
01:03:38,200 --> 01:03:41,120
Speaker 3: horribly at that, and so I would have taken more

1333
01:03:41,200 --> 01:03:44,040
Speaker 3: time to really make sure that we had a solid foundation,

1334
01:03:44,200 --> 01:03:46,800
Speaker 3: and if we didn't, I would have stopped right then

1335
01:03:46,840 --> 01:03:49,120
Speaker 3: and there. And but we can't film until you and

1336
01:03:49,200 --> 01:03:51,160
Speaker 3: I get on the same page, until you and I

1337
01:03:51,400 --> 01:03:53,880
Speaker 3: have one voice, and we won't allow anybody to be

1338
01:03:53,920 --> 01:03:56,920
Speaker 3: able to separate because I don't believe in allow nobody

1339
01:03:57,160 --> 01:03:59,960
Speaker 3: to break your marriage unless it's the two of them,

1340
01:04:00,080 --> 01:04:02,840
Speaker 3: you making a conscious decision. It should never be any

1341
01:04:02,920 --> 01:04:04,880
Speaker 3: outside force it. Even when you asked a question, do

1342
01:04:04,960 --> 01:04:07,200
Speaker 3: you believe the show broke you up? It should never

1343
01:04:07,280 --> 01:04:09,040
Speaker 3: be a thing or a time where a show should

1344
01:04:09,040 --> 01:04:10,600
Speaker 3: be able to do anything, because it shouldn't have that

1345
01:04:10,720 --> 01:04:13,960
Speaker 3: much influence. But it does, you know, and we also

1346
01:04:14,040 --> 01:04:14,800
Speaker 3: felt a victim for that.

1347
01:04:15,480 --> 01:04:17,280
Speaker 2: I love that answer, by the way, I think if

1348
01:04:17,360 --> 01:04:19,160
Speaker 2: I look back at mine, that's probably what I would

1349
01:04:19,200 --> 01:04:21,600
Speaker 2: do as well. I think we I started taking for

1350
01:04:21,680 --> 01:04:23,560
Speaker 2: granted the times we spent together. We used to go

1351
01:04:23,600 --> 01:04:25,360
Speaker 2: out at least, we used to have at least one

1352
01:04:25,480 --> 01:04:27,840
Speaker 2: date a week, no matter what, and we were doing

1353
01:04:27,840 --> 01:04:30,320
Speaker 2: in the daytime, and then we just stopped. As I

1354
01:04:30,440 --> 01:04:34,200
Speaker 2: look back, I started thinking we started, we stopped doing

1355
01:04:34,280 --> 01:04:36,200
Speaker 2: that one on one time because there was so many

1356
01:04:36,320 --> 01:04:38,600
Speaker 2: things that we had the kids, and you know, I

1357
01:04:38,640 --> 01:04:40,280
Speaker 2: thought I was doing my thing with the kids, which

1358
01:04:40,360 --> 01:04:44,080
Speaker 2: was showing her love by doing that. But in reality,

1359
01:04:44,120 --> 01:04:49,120
Speaker 2: we just stopped having that that weekly just you and

1360
01:04:49,280 --> 01:04:52,720
Speaker 2: her type moments, and you could easily get lost and

1361
01:04:52,880 --> 01:04:54,280
Speaker 2: not do it, and then you just forget about it

1362
01:04:54,320 --> 01:04:56,240
Speaker 2: because it just becomes sort of a habit. You don't

1363
01:04:56,240 --> 01:04:57,360
Speaker 2: even realize it's happening.

1364
01:04:57,960 --> 01:05:01,760
Speaker 1: I remember you talking about that actually with when we

1365
01:05:01,840 --> 01:05:04,960
Speaker 1: first started the podcast, and you guys said something very

1366
01:05:05,080 --> 01:05:09,720
Speaker 1: interesting that makes sense now. It sounds like when you

1367
01:05:09,800 --> 01:05:11,800
Speaker 1: get as busy as you guys are, we all are

1368
01:05:11,960 --> 01:05:13,320
Speaker 1: very busy, and I got I got.

1369
01:05:13,720 --> 01:05:16,840
Speaker 2: I also got to your point. I was focused on

1370
01:05:17,040 --> 01:05:19,640
Speaker 2: just bringing in money, right. I got focused on this

1371
01:05:19,800 --> 01:05:25,040
Speaker 2: business and I'm gonna make this thing brand. Yes, and uh,

1372
01:05:25,840 --> 01:05:27,400
Speaker 2: you know I started a solar company at the same

1373
01:05:27,480 --> 01:05:31,760
Speaker 2: time too, so I was just between that and the kids. Yeah,

1374
01:05:31,840 --> 01:05:33,560
Speaker 2: it was taking all my time and I really just

1375
01:05:34,600 --> 01:05:38,040
Speaker 2: stopped paying attention to the one on one time. You know,

1376
01:05:38,120 --> 01:05:41,400
Speaker 2: we're spending time together as a family, but we stopped

1377
01:05:41,520 --> 01:05:43,040
Speaker 2: spending that one on one time.

1378
01:05:43,320 --> 01:05:45,760
Speaker 1: But the one on one time I think that's the

1379
01:05:45,840 --> 01:05:48,480
Speaker 1: most valuable for me anyways, because we still get it.

1380
01:05:49,280 --> 01:05:52,640
Speaker 1: And this is probably just me thinking it in my

1381
01:05:52,720 --> 01:05:56,000
Speaker 1: own little world, but it's when it's spontaneous and you

1382
01:05:56,160 --> 01:06:00,520
Speaker 1: do certain things that just happened and you realize, holy shit,

1383
01:06:00,600 --> 01:06:03,080
Speaker 1: I have, you know, my partner with me, and this happened,

1384
01:06:03,360 --> 01:06:05,800
Speaker 1: and we'll never forget it, and we'd like to do

1385
01:06:05,880 --> 01:06:08,080
Speaker 1: a lot of first things together, like travel to a

1386
01:06:08,280 --> 01:06:11,320
Speaker 1: certain destination for the first time together. But the point

1387
01:06:11,360 --> 01:06:14,080
Speaker 1: I'm trying to make is when you were talking about

1388
01:06:14,120 --> 01:06:19,120
Speaker 1: your relationship back then, and I think Teddy's the one

1389
01:06:19,160 --> 01:06:23,200
Speaker 1: that said, you guys schedule your sex sessions, I'm like, okay,

1390
01:06:23,600 --> 01:06:26,760
Speaker 1: now you're way and busy. If you have to put

1391
01:06:26,920 --> 01:06:29,040
Speaker 1: I'm going to have sex at two thirty in the

1392
01:06:29,120 --> 01:06:31,840
Speaker 1: afternoon because kids are at school and everybody's gone and

1393
01:06:31,920 --> 01:06:35,040
Speaker 1: this is our only window. It's like I'm supposed to

1394
01:06:35,080 --> 01:06:37,360
Speaker 1: get it up on the spot. I mean, this's got

1395
01:06:37,400 --> 01:06:42,600
Speaker 1: a mind of its own. At my age, when it

1396
01:06:42,720 --> 01:06:45,680
Speaker 1: gets up, it's time, you know. But I think it's

1397
01:06:45,760 --> 01:06:50,320
Speaker 1: that spontaneity I appreciate mostly with my wife, you know,

1398
01:06:51,440 --> 01:06:53,800
Speaker 1: and even today it still happens like we're in the kitchen.

1399
01:06:54,280 --> 01:06:56,640
Speaker 1: All our kids are pretty much gone, so we can

1400
01:06:56,720 --> 01:06:58,960
Speaker 1: get frisky in the kitchen and it's fun.

1401
01:06:59,320 --> 01:06:59,520
Speaker 3: You know.

1402
01:06:59,640 --> 01:07:03,040
Speaker 1: Those kind of things makes to go right. But if

1403
01:07:03,080 --> 01:07:05,280
Speaker 1: you stop doing those things, I think that's where the

1404
01:07:05,400 --> 01:07:08,680
Speaker 1: magic kind of goes away. Like m h, those are

1405
01:07:08,760 --> 01:07:11,240
Speaker 1: those are the moments. And even just going out to

1406
01:07:11,320 --> 01:07:14,120
Speaker 1: dinner once a week, that can get old too, unless

1407
01:07:14,160 --> 01:07:17,240
Speaker 1: it's spontaneous. And we've had those too, like, hey, you

1408
01:07:17,320 --> 01:07:19,080
Speaker 1: want to go to dinner? Yeah, where I don't know.

1409
01:07:19,200 --> 01:07:22,040
Speaker 1: Let's just go find a place and just that adventure

1410
01:07:22,600 --> 01:07:25,400
Speaker 1: was fun enough that we didn't have to you know,

1411
01:07:25,560 --> 01:07:28,320
Speaker 1: call our pr company, to call that restaurant that's always

1412
01:07:28,360 --> 01:07:31,200
Speaker 1: sold out that we nobody can get into. Just to

1413
01:07:31,280 --> 01:07:34,760
Speaker 1: get into this restaurant, just to have that experience, I'd

1414
01:07:34,840 --> 01:07:37,400
Speaker 1: rather have that. You know, what are you feeling like today?

1415
01:07:37,480 --> 01:07:39,520
Speaker 1: Let's just go fucking venture out and figure it out.

1416
01:07:39,800 --> 01:07:42,160
Speaker 3: You know. A question for you, so how did you

1417
01:07:42,800 --> 01:07:45,680
Speaker 3: how did you navigate not talk like when you actually

1418
01:07:45,760 --> 01:07:48,400
Speaker 3: did all those moments where you can enjoy each other.

1419
01:07:48,720 --> 01:07:51,720
Speaker 3: How did you not talk about reality TV and things

1420
01:07:51,800 --> 01:07:54,920
Speaker 3: that's happening what you did on the same versus how

1421
01:07:55,000 --> 01:07:57,760
Speaker 3: you should have acted and things like that was a

1422
01:07:57,840 --> 01:07:59,720
Speaker 3: big part of my thing. I remember we went out

1423
01:07:59,720 --> 01:08:03,400
Speaker 3: to me one time. I had this amazing Kent house

1424
01:08:03,440 --> 01:08:06,760
Speaker 3: and it was the absolute worst vacation in the world.

1425
01:08:07,960 --> 01:08:10,880
Speaker 3: We flew out because our tradition we will fly out

1426
01:08:10,960 --> 01:08:13,400
Speaker 3: after reunion and I'm all right, come on, let's so

1427
01:08:13,680 --> 01:08:16,559
Speaker 3: we're gonna go and enjoy ourselves. We're gonna go with WUSA,

1428
01:08:17,160 --> 01:08:19,360
Speaker 3: celebrate getting done with it, finishing up, you know, a

1429
01:08:19,439 --> 01:08:24,080
Speaker 3: new season. And literally we argued and thought about reality

1430
01:08:24,200 --> 01:08:26,680
Speaker 3: TV the entire time, and it was terrible, to the

1431
01:08:26,720 --> 01:08:28,120
Speaker 3: point where I was like, you know, I think I'm

1432
01:08:28,120 --> 01:08:30,519
Speaker 3: ready to go home. Yeah, let me let me see

1433
01:08:30,560 --> 01:08:32,760
Speaker 3: where I can get on another flight here, Simon gel,

1434
01:08:33,200 --> 01:08:35,800
Speaker 3: But how did you actually go to that base and

1435
01:08:35,920 --> 01:08:36,280
Speaker 3: get there.

1436
01:08:36,520 --> 01:08:39,280
Speaker 1: It's it's hard to navigate through that, honestly, because I

1437
01:08:39,720 --> 01:08:42,680
Speaker 1: I when my wife got fired the first time, it

1438
01:08:42,800 --> 01:08:45,479
Speaker 1: took me twelve months to get her off a ledge

1439
01:08:45,520 --> 01:08:48,440
Speaker 1: and to realize that we don't need the show financially,

1440
01:08:48,680 --> 01:08:51,000
Speaker 1: and we have a successful company and we have other

1441
01:08:51,320 --> 01:08:54,840
Speaker 1: ways to make money. Because she's very entrepreneurial as well,

1442
01:08:54,960 --> 01:08:58,400
Speaker 1: which is what I really admire about her. She thinks differently.

1443
01:09:00,280 --> 01:09:03,200
Speaker 1: She thinks, you know, about just building things and doing

1444
01:09:03,360 --> 01:09:07,120
Speaker 1: things for real, not for show purposes, but for real life. Right,

1445
01:09:07,439 --> 01:09:13,760
Speaker 1: So when we finished filming or when the season's over,

1446
01:09:15,200 --> 01:09:17,120
Speaker 1: it takes a long time for me to get her

1447
01:09:17,200 --> 01:09:19,479
Speaker 1: to stop and say, can we just go on a break?

1448
01:09:19,560 --> 01:09:22,160
Speaker 1: You need a break. You've been working five days a week,

1449
01:09:22,240 --> 01:09:24,439
Speaker 1: seven days a week. You need a break. You're getting sick,

1450
01:09:24,520 --> 01:09:28,799
Speaker 1: you're not feeling great. So last year, for her birthday,

1451
01:09:28,880 --> 01:09:32,280
Speaker 1: she decided to get a medical procedure. I think she

1452
01:09:32,400 --> 01:09:35,519
Speaker 1: got an eye lift or something like that, but like, okay,

1453
01:09:35,920 --> 01:09:38,400
Speaker 1: on your birthday, really, now, I can't take you anywhere

1454
01:09:38,640 --> 01:09:41,760
Speaker 1: because I like to travel too. So this year I

1455
01:09:41,920 --> 01:09:46,400
Speaker 1: had to like really pry into her and twist her

1456
01:09:46,520 --> 01:09:49,800
Speaker 1: arm and go, okay, this season or this birthday, I'm

1457
01:09:49,840 --> 01:09:52,519
Speaker 1: going to take you away. I don't care where. You

1458
01:09:52,640 --> 01:09:55,479
Speaker 1: need to tell me. And it took about three weeks

1459
01:09:55,560 --> 01:09:58,799
Speaker 1: for her to, you know, have any ounce of interest

1460
01:09:58,880 --> 01:10:01,160
Speaker 1: in it. And I realized, fuck it, I'm gonna book

1461
01:10:01,200 --> 01:10:02,840
Speaker 1: it and you're gonna go, and you're gonna have to

1462
01:10:02,880 --> 01:10:06,040
Speaker 1: clear your calendar. And I did so because it's her birthday.

1463
01:10:06,080 --> 01:10:08,080
Speaker 1: And there was a lot more dynamics going on here,

1464
01:10:08,160 --> 01:10:10,559
Speaker 1: like my grandmother turning a hundred, and she's like her

1465
01:10:10,600 --> 01:10:13,000
Speaker 1: birthdays two years two days before. My wife is like,

1466
01:10:13,080 --> 01:10:14,360
Speaker 1: which one do I celebrate here?

1467
01:10:14,439 --> 01:10:14,559
Speaker 3: Right?

1468
01:10:16,000 --> 01:10:20,640
Speaker 1: But my final conclusion was I booked the trip to Yosemite,

1469
01:10:20,840 --> 01:10:24,640
Speaker 1: just a simple trip over to Yosemite where I'm sorry, Yellowstone,

1470
01:10:25,000 --> 01:10:28,120
Speaker 1: We're just going to have a little good time. Restaurants, tour,

1471
01:10:28,479 --> 01:10:32,439
Speaker 1: see nature, see the beautiful America. It's something we've never

1472
01:10:32,600 --> 01:10:35,960
Speaker 1: done together before, and it's going to happen. And I

1473
01:10:36,120 --> 01:10:40,400
Speaker 1: think now that she's looking forward to it as of yesterday,

1474
01:10:40,560 --> 01:10:43,720
Speaker 1: because I booked this two weeks ago. She's like, oh no,

1475
01:10:43,920 --> 01:10:46,080
Speaker 1: I'm thinking about it. I think it's going to help

1476
01:10:46,240 --> 01:10:52,360
Speaker 1: her really come off that world of TV and start

1477
01:10:52,800 --> 01:10:56,240
Speaker 1: looking at us. You know what I mean, because when

1478
01:10:56,280 --> 01:10:59,280
Speaker 1: you're on TV, you're always up here thinking I got

1479
01:10:59,360 --> 01:11:01,240
Speaker 1: to entertain, got to know what to say, I gotta

1480
01:11:01,280 --> 01:11:04,680
Speaker 1: wear this, I gotta you know, do that. So to

1481
01:11:04,920 --> 01:11:07,639
Speaker 1: get her to get down and start thinking about what's

1482
01:11:07,840 --> 01:11:12,240
Speaker 1: really important, it's not too hard, but it's one of

1483
01:11:12,320 --> 01:11:15,720
Speaker 1: the challenges. And and I know that she can do

1484
01:11:15,880 --> 01:11:19,080
Speaker 1: it because she was ready to go in you know,

1485
01:11:19,360 --> 01:11:23,720
Speaker 1: guns blazing this season. And the biggest curve that came

1486
01:11:23,800 --> 01:11:27,160
Speaker 1: to her is when Teddy was diagnosed with cancer. And

1487
01:11:27,439 --> 01:11:30,080
Speaker 1: I've never seen her crash and burn so quick and

1488
01:11:30,240 --> 01:11:33,200
Speaker 1: not not realize you know, she's on a TV show.

1489
01:11:33,280 --> 01:11:35,599
Speaker 1: She's got a lot of balls, you know, in the air.

1490
01:11:35,800 --> 01:11:39,519
Speaker 1: You can't just quit. But she had to because that

1491
01:11:40,280 --> 01:11:43,640
Speaker 1: what was more important to her in her life is

1492
01:11:44,200 --> 01:11:46,960
Speaker 1: you know, her friends, her best friend's health, and it

1493
01:11:47,120 --> 01:11:49,679
Speaker 1: really really hit her herd. I can't imagine if something

1494
01:11:49,720 --> 01:11:51,479
Speaker 1: happened to me, what would it do to her. But

1495
01:11:52,320 --> 01:11:57,160
Speaker 1: that's real, that's that's that's the reality of reality TV.

1496
01:11:57,960 --> 01:12:02,240
Speaker 1: And and again she got judged and criticized like, oh,

1497
01:12:02,320 --> 01:12:04,479
Speaker 1: you should quit forever and you know you shouldn't have

1498
01:12:04,600 --> 01:12:07,840
Speaker 1: quit or you know, it's never one or the other, right,

1499
01:12:08,600 --> 01:12:10,960
Speaker 1: But she got through it, and I'm just like, fuck,

1500
01:12:11,000 --> 01:12:13,479
Speaker 1: how do you do it? Babe? You know, I really

1501
01:12:13,600 --> 01:12:15,840
Speaker 1: don't know how she does it. She's she has something

1502
01:12:15,880 --> 01:12:17,919
Speaker 1: in her that she can deal with all that bullshit.

1503
01:12:18,520 --> 01:12:20,840
Speaker 1: And if it was me, I'd be like done, I

1504
01:12:20,880 --> 01:12:23,960
Speaker 1: don't want anything to do. And that's kind of what's

1505
01:12:24,000 --> 01:12:26,120
Speaker 1: allowed me to stay out of the drama. You know,

1506
01:12:26,240 --> 01:12:29,240
Speaker 1: I learned early on, like this is not a house

1507
01:12:29,320 --> 01:12:32,599
Speaker 1: husband show. This is a house wife's show. So let

1508
01:12:32,680 --> 01:12:34,840
Speaker 1: them fight, let them talk, let them do their thing,

1509
01:12:35,560 --> 01:12:38,680
Speaker 1: and you're even. Then you still end up being you know,

1510
01:12:39,360 --> 01:12:41,840
Speaker 1: some sort of collateral and their stupid stories, you know,

1511
01:12:41,920 --> 01:12:44,960
Speaker 1: the stupid stories that these other women make up about you.

1512
01:12:45,479 --> 01:12:47,360
Speaker 1: Do you have any of those? Like did the other

1513
01:12:47,400 --> 01:12:49,160
Speaker 1: women make up any stupid stories about you?

1514
01:12:49,640 --> 01:12:52,439
Speaker 3: Oh? Man, my second my first season, they came out

1515
01:12:52,439 --> 01:12:56,880
Speaker 3: and was like, yeah, Rolf's gad. I'm like, where did

1516
01:12:57,000 --> 01:13:01,160
Speaker 3: this come from? You know, all this is not true,

1517
01:13:01,280 --> 01:13:03,439
Speaker 3: and I don't know who made this up, who said it,

1518
01:13:03,800 --> 01:13:06,519
Speaker 3: who said it, but nobody would say this person said it.

1519
01:13:06,880 --> 01:13:09,160
Speaker 3: So yeah, I got all kinds of stupid things that

1520
01:13:09,240 --> 01:13:12,680
Speaker 3: people have said, you know, but those are things that

1521
01:13:13,120 --> 01:13:14,600
Speaker 3: they Those are things you just got to go and

1522
01:13:14,720 --> 01:13:18,240
Speaker 3: try to deal with and navigate. And it's not always easy.

1523
01:13:18,560 --> 01:13:20,719
Speaker 3: It's not always easy. It's a lot of pressure.

1524
01:13:21,680 --> 01:13:27,280
Speaker 1: Fortunately, when the rumor or lie is not true, you

1525
01:13:27,360 --> 01:13:31,640
Speaker 1: have nothing to prove, right, But when you're investigated by

1526
01:13:31,640 --> 01:13:35,560
Speaker 1: the FBI or you're committing some sort of fraud and

1527
01:13:35,680 --> 01:13:37,720
Speaker 1: you have to come on to social media and try

1528
01:13:37,760 --> 01:13:40,840
Speaker 1: to justify all the things that are going on that

1529
01:13:41,000 --> 01:13:43,519
Speaker 1: usually is a red flag, right, That's usually an occasion

1530
01:13:43,600 --> 01:13:44,200
Speaker 1: that a.

1531
01:13:44,240 --> 01:13:45,080
Speaker 2: Lot of That's true.

1532
01:13:47,120 --> 01:13:50,280
Speaker 3: Those are some real problems, yes, and I know ithing

1533
01:13:50,280 --> 01:13:53,320
Speaker 3: to do with them. I had one other question, you know,

1534
01:13:53,840 --> 01:13:55,680
Speaker 3: because one of the things we also tried to do

1535
01:13:56,800 --> 01:13:59,000
Speaker 3: some other business also on a show a matter of fact,

1536
01:13:59,200 --> 01:14:02,320
Speaker 3: and this is another area of contention that we ended

1537
01:14:02,400 --> 01:14:05,439
Speaker 3: up having. So we actually were working with someone and

1538
01:14:05,600 --> 01:14:08,200
Speaker 3: created a brand called Dropping with Drew, and so Drew

1539
01:14:08,400 --> 01:14:10,720
Speaker 3: was running his business. Dropping with Drew was a weight

1540
01:14:10,800 --> 01:14:13,960
Speaker 3: loss program, and she ended up saying that she was

1541
01:14:14,000 --> 01:14:16,200
Speaker 3: the sea over the company, and they ended up calling

1542
01:14:16,240 --> 01:14:19,280
Speaker 3: her out on it. I was working with their help,

1543
01:14:19,360 --> 01:14:21,760
Speaker 3: you know, promoted and everything else because it really was

1544
01:14:21,960 --> 01:14:24,559
Speaker 3: a great program, but somebody else owned it. We were

1545
01:14:24,640 --> 01:14:27,720
Speaker 3: placing like influencers on it, and then you know, they

1546
01:14:27,840 --> 01:14:29,800
Speaker 3: branded it, you know, so which is something that people

1547
01:14:29,840 --> 01:14:33,120
Speaker 3: could do a lot. And what I did was I

1548
01:14:33,280 --> 01:14:36,240
Speaker 3: was like, I can't be anywhere near it because if

1549
01:14:36,680 --> 01:14:38,720
Speaker 3: it's one thing. As a woman, you can be a

1550
01:14:38,760 --> 01:14:41,599
Speaker 3: great line or they look, oh my god, she lies,

1551
01:14:42,520 --> 01:14:45,599
Speaker 3: she's amazing love for it. As a man, I think

1552
01:14:45,680 --> 01:14:48,840
Speaker 3: as soon as somebody says he threates fake business, just

1553
01:14:48,960 --> 01:14:54,000
Speaker 3: like you know, the FBI is investigating you wherever. He's

1554
01:14:54,040 --> 01:14:55,840
Speaker 3: gonna go to jail at some point, and so all

1555
01:14:55,840 --> 01:14:58,280
Speaker 3: of a sudden you become that guy. I was like,

1556
01:14:58,920 --> 01:15:01,120
Speaker 3: I can't do any thing. I can't be closer is

1557
01:15:01,160 --> 01:15:03,559
Speaker 3: because business is something I really do in real life. Yeah,

1558
01:15:03,760 --> 01:15:07,840
Speaker 3: you can't have anyone attached to my name or any

1559
01:15:07,880 --> 01:15:10,560
Speaker 3: kind of scandal or lies or anything else like that.

1560
01:15:11,080 --> 01:15:14,000
Speaker 3: Call me a bad husband, you know, don't call me

1561
01:15:14,080 --> 01:15:16,600
Speaker 3: a bad business person. I have to have integrity and

1562
01:15:16,720 --> 01:15:19,360
Speaker 3: those things actually do mean something. Well, so would you

1563
01:15:19,560 --> 01:15:22,000
Speaker 3: agree that I made the right decision by pulling away

1564
01:15:22,000 --> 01:15:23,439
Speaker 3: from the business or would you have done it or

1565
01:15:23,439 --> 01:15:25,080
Speaker 3: would you have stayed in the trenches and be like

1566
01:15:25,280 --> 01:15:26,360
Speaker 3: we're gonna burn together.

1567
01:15:27,400 --> 01:15:29,800
Speaker 2: No, I mean, I think you have to keep it

1568
01:15:29,800 --> 01:15:32,160
Speaker 2: about integrity, right. You have to buy your character, and

1569
01:15:32,320 --> 01:15:34,920
Speaker 2: if something's not aligned with your character, you know you

1570
01:15:35,000 --> 01:15:37,640
Speaker 2: got to you gotta go with what your character is.

1571
01:15:38,160 --> 01:15:40,679
Speaker 2: And you know, I always say under pressure, people's character

1572
01:15:40,720 --> 01:15:44,240
Speaker 2: will be revealed. And you know, I think you did

1573
01:15:44,240 --> 01:15:47,559
Speaker 2: the right thing based on you know, that's you wanted

1574
01:15:47,600 --> 01:15:51,000
Speaker 2: to be truthful about what you were about in business.

1575
01:15:51,080 --> 01:15:53,200
Speaker 2: And I think ultimately you have to protect that image.

1576
01:15:53,560 --> 01:15:58,040
Speaker 1: I agree one hundred percent. And my similar story is

1577
01:15:58,120 --> 01:16:01,120
Speaker 1: when I had the gym, I made sure that when

1578
01:16:01,160 --> 01:16:03,720
Speaker 1: we filmed, because the show wanted to film all the time. There,

1579
01:16:03,760 --> 01:16:08,400
Speaker 1: it's our livelihood, it's our lifestyle, it's our business, and

1580
01:16:08,960 --> 01:16:11,960
Speaker 1: I made sure that we never filmed during regular business

1581
01:16:12,000 --> 01:16:15,640
Speaker 1: hours because I have actual clients that you pay us

1582
01:16:15,720 --> 01:16:18,920
Speaker 1: their money to come train and work out and improve

1583
01:16:18,960 --> 01:16:21,240
Speaker 1: their health. They're not paying me to be on my

1584
01:16:21,439 --> 01:16:24,320
Speaker 1: TV show or my wife's TV show, right, so it's

1585
01:16:24,479 --> 01:16:28,680
Speaker 1: super important for me to distinguish. Okay, I might have

1586
01:16:28,920 --> 01:16:32,960
Speaker 1: some clients and members that might want to be on TV.

1587
01:16:33,080 --> 01:16:34,560
Speaker 1: I mean there's a lot of people that want to

1588
01:16:34,600 --> 01:16:37,680
Speaker 1: be on TV and are willing to volunteer to be

1589
01:16:37,840 --> 01:16:41,240
Speaker 1: in this workout or this scene or whatever. But it

1590
01:16:41,400 --> 01:16:43,639
Speaker 1: was never like, hey, this is a real class that's

1591
01:16:43,720 --> 01:16:46,920
Speaker 1: going on now and these are all real members. None

1592
01:16:46,960 --> 01:16:51,120
Speaker 1: of that was happening because it's not real a real business.

1593
01:16:51,200 --> 01:16:53,800
Speaker 1: It's I'm training you one on one or I'm working

1594
01:16:53,840 --> 01:16:55,960
Speaker 1: with you one on one, and it's here it's not

1595
01:16:56,120 --> 01:16:59,840
Speaker 1: for TV purposes, you know. So I think you did it.

1596
01:17:00,400 --> 01:17:01,400
Speaker 1: You made the right decision.

1597
01:17:02,479 --> 01:17:04,840
Speaker 3: I appreciate that, and I thought so because I feel

1598
01:17:04,920 --> 01:17:08,120
Speaker 3: great about my decision. But she was, yes, I think

1599
01:17:08,200 --> 01:17:10,280
Speaker 3: that was another crack, a breaking place. She was like,

1600
01:17:10,400 --> 01:17:14,040
Speaker 3: you know what, Ralph, you don't support me. Like, there's

1601
01:17:14,080 --> 01:17:16,720
Speaker 3: certain things I can do, you know, I can talk

1602
01:17:16,760 --> 01:17:19,560
Speaker 3: about the Tampa situation. I can't go yeah, but me

1603
01:17:19,960 --> 01:17:22,160
Speaker 3: do whatever else you need to do. I can be

1604
01:17:22,520 --> 01:17:24,600
Speaker 3: down with you with that. But my character and my

1605
01:17:24,760 --> 01:17:26,640
Speaker 3: titet and those are things that stay with you for

1606
01:17:26,720 --> 01:17:28,320
Speaker 3: the rest of your life. And that's something I got

1607
01:17:28,439 --> 01:17:28,840
Speaker 3: to stand on.

1608
01:17:29,640 --> 01:17:32,679
Speaker 2: Yeah, yep, that's one. Like you said, that's the character

1609
01:17:32,760 --> 01:17:34,240
Speaker 2: that no one can take that away from you. Right,

1610
01:17:35,360 --> 01:17:37,559
Speaker 2: Your talent, all that stuff can go away, but your character,

1611
01:17:38,000 --> 01:17:38,879
Speaker 2: you know, that's something.

1612
01:17:38,680 --> 01:17:40,880
Speaker 1: You could proverb So I do have one more question.

1613
01:17:40,960 --> 01:17:44,160
Speaker 1: Speaking of character, we talked about this in our last

1614
01:17:44,200 --> 01:17:50,360
Speaker 1: interview with Frankie, and I really really enjoyed the conversation

1615
01:17:50,560 --> 01:17:54,599
Speaker 1: because it had everything to do with integrating your next

1616
01:17:54,800 --> 01:17:59,000
Speaker 1: chapter of your life with your ex partner and her

1617
01:17:59,160 --> 01:18:03,280
Speaker 1: new partner. And what they've done is they've just raised

1618
01:18:03,520 --> 01:18:06,640
Speaker 1: children together. They've traveled together, they have they go to

1619
01:18:06,680 --> 01:18:07,479
Speaker 1: the movies together.

1620
01:18:07,560 --> 01:18:08,080
Speaker 2: They do all this.

1621
01:18:08,160 --> 01:18:10,720
Speaker 1: Crazy shit that normal people don't do. You know, like

1622
01:18:11,200 --> 01:18:15,720
Speaker 1: in a breakup, do you ever see yourself having that

1623
01:18:15,960 --> 01:18:18,439
Speaker 1: kind of lifestyle where you and Drew kind of get

1624
01:18:18,479 --> 01:18:22,160
Speaker 1: along as friends. Now that there's no, for lack of

1625
01:18:22,240 --> 01:18:26,560
Speaker 1: better descriptions, sexual tension, No, no sexual relationships. But you

1626
01:18:26,640 --> 01:18:29,360
Speaker 1: know what, you're the parents. You're gonna raise the kids

1627
01:18:29,400 --> 01:18:31,120
Speaker 1: together and you're going to show them, you know that

1628
01:18:31,320 --> 01:18:33,439
Speaker 1: you ultimately, at the end of the end of the day,

1629
01:18:33,479 --> 01:18:37,599
Speaker 1: you have to respect each other and go as far

1630
01:18:37,680 --> 01:18:42,040
Speaker 1: as traveling, going on vacation as a family, celebrating holidays

1631
01:18:42,080 --> 01:18:43,559
Speaker 1: as a family. Can you envision that.

1632
01:18:44,760 --> 01:18:47,719
Speaker 3: We've already done it? Oh you have? Yeah, we've actually

1633
01:18:47,800 --> 01:18:50,720
Speaker 3: did it. We took a cruise, you know, just to

1634
01:18:50,760 --> 01:18:54,360
Speaker 3: take the kids out, just you know, because my thing

1635
01:18:54,560 --> 01:18:57,160
Speaker 3: is is I feel like adult, my kids don't deserve

1636
01:18:57,200 --> 01:19:00,360
Speaker 3: none of this, right, it's adults that do stupid things. Yeah,

1637
01:19:01,000 --> 01:19:03,559
Speaker 3: and so I want to make sure that we show

1638
01:19:03,640 --> 01:19:06,720
Speaker 3: up as a unified front for our kids. Now, you know,

1639
01:19:06,880 --> 01:19:10,240
Speaker 3: once everything is finalized, said, done, you know and sign

1640
01:19:10,360 --> 01:19:13,479
Speaker 3: shildo and delivered. I don't know how it be, but

1641
01:19:13,680 --> 01:19:15,759
Speaker 3: my thing is, even with the book the Step and parenting,

1642
01:19:16,360 --> 01:19:20,120
Speaker 3: I believed of integrating, you know, because you don't want

1643
01:19:20,200 --> 01:19:24,639
Speaker 3: to create a toxic environment for the family, because then

1644
01:19:24,760 --> 01:19:27,280
Speaker 3: that's what the kids are going to be about product

1645
01:19:27,320 --> 01:19:30,439
Speaker 3: of you know. And so my goal is to try

1646
01:19:30,479 --> 01:19:33,280
Speaker 3: to figure out how to really be able to solve

1647
01:19:33,439 --> 01:19:36,200
Speaker 3: some of these different challenges that may plague us. And

1648
01:19:36,840 --> 01:19:39,200
Speaker 3: it's easier said than done, of course, because even you know,

1649
01:19:39,520 --> 01:19:42,080
Speaker 3: and even talking about your situation, you know, it's like,

1650
01:19:42,080 --> 01:19:44,080
Speaker 3: all right, this is what I'm dealing with there. But

1651
01:19:44,680 --> 01:19:47,839
Speaker 3: you know, if there's a way to create or cultivate

1652
01:19:47,880 --> 01:19:50,760
Speaker 3: an environment that is positive, I just don't know how

1653
01:19:50,800 --> 01:19:52,880
Speaker 3: that's going to look yet. I'm not there at that

1654
01:19:53,000 --> 01:19:56,240
Speaker 3: point of integrating everything together. But at some point in

1655
01:19:56,360 --> 01:19:58,720
Speaker 3: time it does have to I would I would like

1656
01:19:58,800 --> 01:20:01,160
Speaker 3: it to happen to some degree. I just don't know

1657
01:20:01,520 --> 01:20:04,840
Speaker 3: how that looks as of yet. So it's like I'm

1658
01:20:04,960 --> 01:20:09,120
Speaker 3: just you know, being positive and being optimistic that everything

1659
01:20:09,160 --> 01:20:12,280
Speaker 3: will work itself out, and also even my kids making

1660
01:20:12,320 --> 01:20:15,000
Speaker 3: sure they're happy because I don't know what it looks

1661
01:20:15,120 --> 01:20:17,360
Speaker 3: like and it feels like to live away from you know. Yeah,

1662
01:20:17,520 --> 01:20:21,599
Speaker 3: and so those are things you know, ed when are

1663
01:20:21,640 --> 01:20:23,360
Speaker 3: you still living at home? Yeah?

1664
01:20:23,560 --> 01:20:26,479
Speaker 2: Ninety percent of the time, yes, ninety percent of the time. Yeah,

1665
01:20:26,520 --> 01:20:28,720
Speaker 2: so we were doing this thing called nesting. But then

1666
01:20:28,760 --> 01:20:32,479
Speaker 2: after Teddy got sick. Uh, now I'm sort of helping

1667
01:20:32,560 --> 01:20:35,320
Speaker 2: take care of her. So that's where I'm here ninety

1668
01:20:35,320 --> 01:20:37,439
Speaker 2: percent of the time. Still they have like one two

1669
01:20:37,479 --> 01:20:38,719
Speaker 2: days where I stay at the other house.

1670
01:20:39,439 --> 01:20:42,320
Speaker 3: Got it understood, So you know, even in that situation,

1671
01:20:42,960 --> 01:20:45,439
Speaker 3: I'm sorry to hear about that. Also, many has a

1672
01:20:45,479 --> 01:20:49,000
Speaker 3: double where it is it is, So for me, it's like,

1673
01:20:49,000 --> 01:20:51,439
Speaker 3: all right, how do I make sure that you know

1674
01:20:51,600 --> 01:20:55,559
Speaker 3: everything is positive and how it is to live away

1675
01:20:56,040 --> 01:20:59,680
Speaker 3: from your kids and have and not able to have

1676
01:20:59,800 --> 01:21:02,080
Speaker 3: that to them. Where something happens, I can get to

1677
01:21:02,160 --> 01:21:04,559
Speaker 3: them real quick, because right now that's the life I live.

1678
01:21:04,680 --> 01:21:06,160
Speaker 3: If I need to see them, I can see them,

1679
01:21:06,560 --> 01:21:08,160
Speaker 3: even in the midst of this two and a half

1680
01:21:08,280 --> 01:21:11,040
Speaker 3: year divorce. If I need to see my kids right now,

1681
01:21:11,439 --> 01:21:13,360
Speaker 3: as soon as they come home from school, I'll see

1682
01:21:13,400 --> 01:21:15,360
Speaker 3: them every I see them every day, you know, unless

1683
01:21:15,439 --> 01:21:19,000
Speaker 3: I'm traveling. But going into a world where it's like, ah,

1684
01:21:19,320 --> 01:21:21,439
Speaker 3: you can't see them for this amount of time, I

1685
01:21:21,560 --> 01:21:24,960
Speaker 3: just don't know how that feels. And so that's a

1686
01:21:25,160 --> 01:21:27,800
Speaker 3: new dynamic that I have to enter into and journey into.

1687
01:21:27,920 --> 01:21:30,880
Speaker 3: And so everything is new. It's I think it's a

1688
01:21:30,960 --> 01:21:34,200
Speaker 3: season of new beginnings. And you know that's something I'm

1689
01:21:34,240 --> 01:21:36,000
Speaker 3: just trying to just be optimistic about. But I don't

1690
01:21:36,000 --> 01:21:38,160
Speaker 3: know how it feels. People can tell you about it, Yeah,

1691
01:21:38,160 --> 01:21:40,960
Speaker 3: it's another thing to actually experience it for yourself.

1692
01:21:42,000 --> 01:21:44,560
Speaker 1: As you're talking, I'm thinking about right now. You know,

1693
01:21:45,080 --> 01:21:47,000
Speaker 1: one of the most common things that they do in

1694
01:21:47,080 --> 01:21:49,799
Speaker 1: divorce is they give the parents fifty to fifty custody,

1695
01:21:49,880 --> 01:21:54,400
Speaker 1: and that's considered fair, right, But what the courts don't

1696
01:21:54,439 --> 01:21:57,879
Speaker 1: really think about is the kids. That that ultimately becomes

1697
01:21:58,280 --> 01:22:01,240
Speaker 1: a possession for parents. It's like, it's my time. You

1698
01:22:01,320 --> 01:22:03,880
Speaker 1: can't talk to your own kid on my time. I

1699
01:22:03,960 --> 01:22:05,920
Speaker 1: can't believe. I can't tell you how toxic that is.

1700
01:22:06,280 --> 01:22:09,599
Speaker 1: It's just so bad that, like you just proved the point,

1701
01:22:09,720 --> 01:22:12,040
Speaker 1: like if I want to wake up and talk to

1702
01:22:12,160 --> 01:22:14,600
Speaker 1: my child and see my child, there should be no

1703
01:22:14,760 --> 01:22:19,520
Speaker 1: one between me and my child to cut that communication.

1704
01:22:19,640 --> 01:22:22,519
Speaker 1: I don't care who you are, right, So to have

1705
01:22:22,800 --> 01:22:25,680
Speaker 1: that possession and think, oh, it's on my time, so

1706
01:22:25,760 --> 01:22:28,120
Speaker 1: you can't talk to my kids, it comes down to

1707
01:22:28,240 --> 01:22:31,880
Speaker 1: the parents, It comes down to the person. And what

1708
01:22:32,080 --> 01:22:37,040
Speaker 1: you guys do together is ultimately going to affect the kids. Right,

1709
01:22:37,960 --> 01:22:41,600
Speaker 1: So if you can get yourself there, Ralph to a

1710
01:22:41,720 --> 01:22:45,360
Speaker 1: point where you know what, it doesn't matter what she says,

1711
01:22:45,520 --> 01:22:48,519
Speaker 1: but you want to keep that door open between you two.

1712
01:22:48,600 --> 01:22:50,880
Speaker 1: So if one morning she wakes up and she has

1713
01:22:50,960 --> 01:22:53,160
Speaker 1: to talk to the kids, you have to be like,

1714
01:22:53,240 --> 01:22:56,400
Speaker 1: I fucking hate this girl, but you gotta let her

1715
01:22:56,520 --> 01:22:58,639
Speaker 1: talk to the kids and vice versa. Right, no matter

1716
01:22:58,720 --> 01:23:02,040
Speaker 1: how much you piss up or she hit she hates you.

1717
01:23:02,640 --> 01:23:04,519
Speaker 1: If you want to wake up that next morning, then

1718
01:23:04,600 --> 01:23:07,519
Speaker 1: they're not with you. They're with your ex. You have

1719
01:23:07,680 --> 01:23:10,160
Speaker 1: to have that ability to just make a phone call

1720
01:23:10,240 --> 01:23:11,960
Speaker 1: or even come over and see your kids. I don't

1721
01:23:12,040 --> 01:23:14,760
Speaker 1: get why it's so important to have a fifty to

1722
01:23:14,800 --> 01:23:17,200
Speaker 1: fifty custody where you can't see your kid. That drives

1723
01:23:17,280 --> 01:23:18,479
Speaker 1: me nuts, you know.

1724
01:23:18,600 --> 01:23:20,559
Speaker 3: Interesting enough, I don't have fifty to fifty right now,

1725
01:23:21,120 --> 01:23:24,600
Speaker 3: so you know I have visit T shirt rights in

1726
01:23:24,680 --> 01:23:30,800
Speaker 3: my own house. It's actually it is what it is.

1727
01:23:31,360 --> 01:23:34,599
Speaker 3: SEE has the primary custody of the kids at this moment.

1728
01:23:34,920 --> 01:23:37,879
Speaker 3: I have first, third, and fifth weekends, so on Friday

1729
01:23:38,040 --> 01:23:40,519
Speaker 3: it starts to become my weekend, you know, to where

1730
01:23:40,520 --> 01:23:45,040
Speaker 3: I'm with the kids. But I mentioned it's not it's

1731
01:23:45,080 --> 01:23:47,200
Speaker 3: some things I can't do, of course, because how it

1732
01:23:47,360 --> 01:23:50,479
Speaker 3: is is it's kind of separated. But at the same time,

1733
01:23:51,080 --> 01:23:53,000
Speaker 3: you know, I can still go up there if I

1734
01:23:53,120 --> 01:23:54,880
Speaker 3: need to to go and do certain things. I just

1735
01:23:55,000 --> 01:23:57,599
Speaker 3: try to make sure we just respect each other's boundaries

1736
01:23:57,640 --> 01:24:00,840
Speaker 3: more than anything else. And I think I love your point,

1737
01:24:00,920 --> 01:24:02,360
Speaker 3: but I don't think that's going to be an issue

1738
01:24:02,360 --> 01:24:04,080
Speaker 3: with us, because I think there will be an open

1739
01:24:04,960 --> 01:24:08,160
Speaker 3: door of communication between the both of us in regardless.

1740
01:24:08,200 --> 01:24:09,560
Speaker 3: At the end of the day, my son got my

1741
01:24:09,640 --> 01:24:13,479
Speaker 3: blood running through me. She can't because he's a little

1742
01:24:13,479 --> 01:24:18,880
Speaker 3: bit of a wild part. So the great thing is

1743
01:24:18,880 --> 01:24:22,000
Speaker 3: they're daddy kids, you know. They They're not going to

1744
01:24:22,080 --> 01:24:24,879
Speaker 3: allow themselves not to be able to get in contact

1745
01:24:24,920 --> 01:24:28,280
Speaker 3: with me. They come downstairs and wake me up, or

1746
01:24:28,400 --> 01:24:30,599
Speaker 3: if I'm whatever I'm doing, they run into my office.

1747
01:24:30,760 --> 01:24:32,599
Speaker 3: This is something that they do on a regular basis,

1748
01:24:32,680 --> 01:24:35,960
Speaker 3: and so it will it will hurt them, but they there.

1749
01:24:36,840 --> 01:24:38,840
Speaker 3: I believe that that will continue. I made sure I

1750
01:24:38,960 --> 01:24:41,640
Speaker 3: also bought both of them cell phones so that if

1751
01:24:41,720 --> 01:24:43,439
Speaker 3: I need to speak with them, I just call them

1752
01:24:43,479 --> 01:24:46,240
Speaker 3: directly unless she takes the phone away. You know, but

1753
01:24:46,560 --> 01:24:48,240
Speaker 3: I can reach out to them and they can reach

1754
01:24:48,280 --> 01:24:50,600
Speaker 3: out to me without any kind of problems with so

1755
01:24:50,920 --> 01:24:53,080
Speaker 3: we don't have a toxic relationship to where it's like.

1756
01:24:53,840 --> 01:24:57,280
Speaker 3: And then also I've wished her well just like my song. Yeah,

1757
01:24:57,479 --> 01:25:01,559
Speaker 3: you know, so it's all good, all love. It's all

1758
01:25:01,640 --> 01:25:04,439
Speaker 3: love on this side, you know. But I'm just focusing

1759
01:25:04,520 --> 01:25:07,080
Speaker 3: on just trying to make sure that my kids, my family,

1760
01:25:07,160 --> 01:25:10,120
Speaker 3: everybody is doing well and thriving. That's the goal of

1761
01:25:10,240 --> 01:25:11,840
Speaker 3: why become parents in the first place.

1762
01:25:12,160 --> 01:25:16,280
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, that's great and that's a great attitude. Thank

1763
01:25:16,320 --> 01:25:17,439
Speaker 1: you so much for Ralph.

1764
01:25:17,439 --> 01:25:18,120
Speaker 2: Thank you so much.

1765
01:25:18,360 --> 01:25:20,600
Speaker 1: Great getting to know you. I knew I would like

1766
01:25:20,680 --> 01:25:23,360
Speaker 1: to start saw that you have all these things you've

1767
01:25:23,360 --> 01:25:25,920
Speaker 1: done in your life. You're doing what you're doing, man,

1768
01:25:26,080 --> 01:25:28,720
Speaker 1: I mean, you're living your life and I really admire that.

1769
01:25:28,920 --> 01:25:29,720
Speaker 1: Keep doing what you're doing.

1770
01:25:30,320 --> 01:25:32,320
Speaker 3: I do appreciate it. Thanks for having me, guys, keep

1771
01:25:32,400 --> 01:25:35,639
Speaker 3: doing what I love this platform. Let's keep it rap

1772
01:25:35,720 --> 01:25:38,600
Speaker 3: you going to BRABA con No, they're not gonna write me.

1773
01:25:41,600 --> 01:25:43,880
Speaker 3: I am the weakest link you know right now. But

1774
01:25:44,360 --> 01:25:45,960
Speaker 3: I don't have gotten invite yet.

1775
01:25:46,040 --> 01:25:50,240
Speaker 2: But you know, I don't know, but maybe you and

1776
01:25:50,280 --> 01:25:50,920
Speaker 2: I will crash it.

1777
01:25:52,640 --> 01:25:53,519
Speaker 3: That would be so gory.

1778
01:25:54,240 --> 01:25:57,400
Speaker 2: We need to ed Eddie can sneakers in through the back.

1779
01:25:57,600 --> 01:25:59,439
Speaker 1: I could totally sneak into the bag.

1780
01:26:01,000 --> 01:26:02,360
Speaker 3: We can have like a meet and greet off to

1781
01:26:02,400 --> 01:26:03,160
Speaker 3: the side or something like.

1782
01:26:03,200 --> 01:26:05,400
Speaker 2: Exactly exactly on the side.

1783
01:26:05,560 --> 01:26:11,400
Speaker 1: Totally all right, boys, thank you so much. We'll see

1784
01:26:11,400 --> 01:26:12,000
Speaker 1: you again soon.

1785
01:26:12,280 --> 01:26:14,719
Speaker 2: See bye Ralph, Bye bye Ralph.