Speaker 1: Hell I Suck At Dating with Denglert and Dared Haven
Speaker 1: and I heart radio podcast. What's going on everyone, and
Speaker 1: welcome to an all new episode of Help I Suck
Speaker 1: At Dating and what an incredibly special episode. Today we
Speaker 1: have the star of the podcast, Jared have been joining us,
Speaker 1: the guest host Dean Anglert, and a very special guest
Speaker 1: host as well. Today, Heather Martin is joining us. Um, Heather,
Speaker 1: how are you? I'm doing great? How are you guys doing?
Speaker 1: We are doing. I would like to make a quick
Speaker 1: note if case something happens to me, Um, I am
Speaker 1: in the van again. I don't have very good well
Speaker 1: the service is fine. What do you mean if something
Speaker 1: happens to you? Where are you in the world right now?
Speaker 1: That's on sketchy. Well, it's more so just you know,
Speaker 1: you're not I'm not calling in from like a reliable
Speaker 1: WiFi connection, so you never really know what's going to happen.
Speaker 1: Are you ever calling in on a reliable WiFi connection? Yeah? Okay,
Speaker 1: it was last week from the Mexican restaurant in uh San,
Speaker 1: Raphael or whoever the heck I was. I haven't listened
Speaker 1: to the episode yet, but yeah, I figured I was
Speaker 1: probably gonna do one of the best episodes you've ever had.
Speaker 1: I think about it. I think it's a classic. They're
Speaker 1: all classics. Dean Hungler, Where in the World In ten years,
Speaker 1: when we're looking back through the anals of Help I
Speaker 1: Suck at Dating, We're gonna look at that episode as
Speaker 1: one of the highlights. I think, Oh, I completely concur Well,
Speaker 1: we have a great episode coming up for you, Heather.
Speaker 1: First of all, how are you? We want to catch
Speaker 1: up with you? Um? You are you? Do you still
Speaker 1: live in something California? You still I'm in San Diego. Yep.
Speaker 1: It's finally starting to get warm here some so it
Speaker 1: isn't great things are opening. Yeah, it's been really good.
Speaker 1: So the last time we saw you, obviously you were
Speaker 1: on Matt James season. You came in in the van
Speaker 1: halfway just about halfway through the season. I'm assuming that
Speaker 1: was not your decision. You didn't want to come halfway
Speaker 1: through to tell us, well, like what exactly happened. Did
Speaker 1: you reach out to Doucers halfway through and was like, hey,
Speaker 1: I'm regretting not coming on, or were you like, hey
Speaker 1: can I come on night one? And they're like, no,
Speaker 1: you gotta come on later. Yeah, yeah, no, I definitely didn't.
Speaker 1: Definitely was not ideal to come halfway through it. Also,
Speaker 1: basically what happened to it all started last summer when
Speaker 1: Hannah came to my house and she came to visit
Speaker 1: and she was like, oh, Heather, you'd be really good
Speaker 1: with that, and then just like kind of brought it
Speaker 1: up casually, but like he was already announced to be
Speaker 1: the bachelor at that point, so I was like, we
Speaker 1: both both of us were like, Okay, well that can't happen,
Speaker 1: but whatever. But then she keep talking about it and
Speaker 1: talking about it, and she's like you just you really,
Speaker 1: like I really think you'd a good match. And I
Speaker 1: was like, dang, it's like it's like she doesn't like
Speaker 1: cannons all the type of first and to like really
Speaker 1: say that often, like she doesn't try to like set
Speaker 1: me up a bunch of people or like her friends
Speaker 1: up with a bunch of people. So I was like,
Speaker 1: dang it, like that really means something. And so she's
Speaker 1: kept talking about it, and we're like, okay, let's let's
Speaker 1: see what she's like. I'll see what I can do.
Speaker 1: So she talked to some people and then I talked
Speaker 1: to some people, and that was over the course of
Speaker 1: like months, you know. Um, and then finally like started
Speaker 1: to have like some conversations and go through the process
Speaker 1: a little bit. But it was definitely like a little
Speaker 1: it was definitely later than like the normal casting process.
Speaker 1: And so there's just lots of things that happened and uh,
Speaker 1: conversations that we had and and by the point that
Speaker 1: it was just like they're just like okay, like it's
Speaker 1: kind of too late. And then so took it upon
Speaker 1: myself and headed out there on my own. What are
Speaker 1: some of what were some of those conversations like that,
Speaker 1: they were really like it's too late, and you actually
Speaker 1: went out there on your own. Uh, it's always real.
Speaker 1: I never had like one of my lists out of
Speaker 1: um you could say just say there's you'll never get
Speaker 1: in trouble for telling the truth. I mean you went out,
Speaker 1: you went out on your own. But was there I
Speaker 1: don't know anybody who is like, hey, you know, maybe
Speaker 1: you should do it. Like of course you took it
Speaker 1: on your own to do it it, but was there
Speaker 1: anybody helping you? I think like it was like no,
Speaker 1: like I really like truly like me going out there
Speaker 1: was not. It was my choice. Like they were like
Speaker 1: we're just having conversations, and I think they're like the
Speaker 1: you know, there's a lot more that goes into going
Speaker 1: on the show besides just like showing up. So I
Speaker 1: seem like going through the it was like I think
Speaker 1: I really was like late in the process and getting everything,
Speaker 1: you know, approved, and you know all that kind of stuff,
Speaker 1: especially during COVID times. During COVID times, everything's weird um,
Speaker 1: And so they're kind of just like how they're like
Speaker 1: it's like we can't authorize you to come, and then
Speaker 1: you were like, screw that, I'm coming. I'm not going
Speaker 1: to regret not meeting Matt in my life. Have you
Speaker 1: ever met Matt before the show? No? So I've never
Speaker 1: met him at all. I had like said high to
Speaker 1: him on face, like Hannah when she was at my house,
Speaker 1: but she's at my house for like three and a
Speaker 1: half weeks, Like she had FaceTime to a couple of times,
Speaker 1: and I like I said like, oh hey, like on FaceTime,
Speaker 1: but like wasn't like in a conversation at all, Like
Speaker 1: so I had it. I had it at him. I
Speaker 1: really had any interactions. And then how do you feel
Speaker 1: looking back now, do you regret it at all? No?
Speaker 1: I don't. I think it's good, nor should you, because
Speaker 1: I think you made the right decision. Thank you. I
Speaker 1: think I would have. I think I always regret that
Speaker 1: things like I do not rather than the things I do.
Speaker 1: It was like one of those things I'm like, I
Speaker 1: could look like an absolute freak. I probably did. I did,
Speaker 1: And it was like, I look like a weirdo, but
Speaker 1: like I'm like, who cares? Like people who know me
Speaker 1: know me. If you think I'm a weirdo, whatever, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna go for it. And so and also I feel like,
Speaker 1: to you look, from the first go around, you always
Speaker 1: learn how um shortsighted everyone is. Where it's like, okay,
Speaker 1: maybe you like go in and people like have this
Speaker 1: opinion of you, but then that just kind of fades
Speaker 1: away after a short amount of time anyways, you know,
Speaker 1: So it's like, forget who cares. At the end of
Speaker 1: the day, you like you said, your family and friends
Speaker 1: know you, they love you for who you are, and
Speaker 1: so it's like who cares if some random person in
Speaker 1: Arkansas was like, oh, there's weird for showing up in
Speaker 1: a minivand minivand totally one thousands, and that's why I
Speaker 1: was like, I was gonna go for it. I feel
Speaker 1: like I have like the type person who like I
Speaker 1: get like weirdly nervous and freaked out about like the
Speaker 1: stupidest things, like like I'll get nervous like ascal water
Speaker 1: for something, but like these big, like grand things, I'm
Speaker 1: just like I don't get it's so weird, like it's
Speaker 1: probably something wrong with me. But it's like okay, sure, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: So you're afraid to ask the waiter for extra catchup,
Speaker 1: but going on a reality TV show unprompt, I'm in baby. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's so like it's so weird. Like I was like
Speaker 1: calling my family like talking about like booking a hotels
Speaker 1: like okay, like should I asked the lady if I
Speaker 1: can put my suitcase in there for an hour? And
Speaker 1: they're like, you're about to go to a TV show
Speaker 1: like without like by yourself, and you're afraid to ask
Speaker 1: the lady at the Hampton ind if because she can
Speaker 1: store your sea so like, yeah, it's so weird. So
Speaker 1: I watched I watched some of Matt season, um, not
Speaker 1: all of it, but I did watch that episode and
Speaker 1: I remember specifically the girls were so mean to you.
Speaker 1: Were they that mean in real life or was that
Speaker 1: just like an editing thing. It was It was not
Speaker 1: editing at all. Um, they were so mean. It was
Speaker 1: really really intense. Yeah, Like I I think I should
Speaker 1: have been I think it was. That was like the
Speaker 1: one thing I was naive to, like I was expecting,
Speaker 1: Like I think I kind of like it was going
Speaker 1: in well aware of like what could happen, blah blah blah.
Speaker 1: But I think I was like not expecting them to
Speaker 1: be so intense and so like, yeah, like just on
Speaker 1: the attack, Like I was just like what they were
Speaker 1: extremely rude. I remember watching that episode and the like
Speaker 1: Dean said, it was ridiculous. There was no reason for
Speaker 1: them to be that much of a jerk to you.
Speaker 1: Did they have every right to be annoyed? Of course,
Speaker 1: like Heather, if you were on the opposite if somebody
Speaker 1: came in halfway through Colton season like this sucks, I
Speaker 1: don't want more people here. I'm annoyed. I don't like
Speaker 1: this person. But the fact that they were so overly
Speaker 1: mean to the point that they made you cry, God,
Speaker 1: that kissed me off. It was Yeah, I know, and
Speaker 1: I expected them mad, and I was like, are like frustrated, annoyed, mad, whatever?
Speaker 1: And I would have been too, like I totually and
Speaker 1: that's why I was like, I totally understand where you
Speaker 1: guys are coming from. But yeah, it was just like
Speaker 1: very like condescending. I just felt like less than a
Speaker 1: human and it was like, what is happen? It was
Speaker 1: not necessary? Was there any recourse after the fact, Like
Speaker 1: obviously you couldn't talk to the girls that night when
Speaker 1: you left, But have you spoken with any of the
Speaker 1: girls from Matt season since I have? I have? I Yeah,
Speaker 1: I talked to a bunch of them, and it was
Speaker 1: really like immediately they were all so nice, like apologize
Speaker 1: and like so like those like at this like no
Speaker 1: bad blood I don't, like I understood, and I understand
Speaker 1: like in that world like things are like heightened and
Speaker 1: stuff like that. So when I did get stock then,
Speaker 1: like it made me feel a lot better and like
Speaker 1: that's awesome here, yeah, because like like you, like you said,
Speaker 1: and what we all know is that we can you
Speaker 1: can kind of lose yourself a little bit in those
Speaker 1: moments because you're so amped up and like everything is
Speaker 1: so heightened, and you know you're so stressed out, and
Speaker 1: you're tired, and you're everybody's going after this one person,
Speaker 1: and so you're already on edge, and so something like
Speaker 1: that can set you off. So I'm glad that the
Speaker 1: girls who were mean to you, we're like, hey, listen,
Speaker 1: my bad. I kind of lost it a little bit
Speaker 1: at the rental car company, were there just not very
Speaker 1: many cars available? Was the van the only thing? You
Speaker 1: know what. I just walked up to the thing and
Speaker 1: I was like, hey, I need a car, and they're like, hey,
Speaker 1: we have we have this minivan. In my mind, did
Speaker 1: not think one thing of it. I was like, perfect, okay,
Speaker 1: let's go. Like if not for a second did it
Speaker 1: cross my mind that that was weird. I just didn't
Speaker 1: even think about it at all. Nor did I think
Speaker 1: like my car was going to be part of it.
Speaker 1: I guess I okay, but I literally thought nothing of
Speaker 1: them an Evan had no idea what that was gonna
Speaker 1: You probably didn't even think that they were going to
Speaker 1: show the car, right, Like, yeah, I was like I
Speaker 1: didn't know what was gonna happen, but I definitely didn't
Speaker 1: think my car, Yeah, they're going to show my car. Heather,
Speaker 1: how old are you so you're probably twenty four when
Speaker 1: this was filming, right, I thought you couldn't rent a
Speaker 1: car until you were twenty five. I just turned twenty
Speaker 1: five when when we were felling, oh you were. It
Speaker 1: was like my first frontal car experience on my own. Okay, nice,
Speaker 1: I was going to say that was a pretty major
Speaker 1: plot hole that we looked over if you wasn't old
Speaker 1: enough for the rental car. Yeah, it was perfect. It's
Speaker 1: just like, I don't know what I would have done
Speaker 1: if I didn't have that. You would have like taken
Speaker 1: an uber up instead? Yeah? Yeah, it was like it
Speaker 1: was like a couple. It was probably two hours from
Speaker 1: the airport, so you could have pulled up like Harry
Speaker 1: from Dumb and Dumber in the Little mop head. Oh
Speaker 1: oh my god. Great missed opportunity there, damn it. So
Speaker 1: my question is you've never been to Paradise. What the
Speaker 1: hell is going on? Why are you not in Paradise?
Speaker 1: You had because your storyline. I remember in Colton season
Speaker 1: you were never you know, you were never kissed, and
Speaker 1: then you had your first kiss with Colton and then
Speaker 1: you remember we had dinner. It was like a bunch
Speaker 1: of us and it was the first time I ever
Speaker 1: met you and you were like, oh, yeah, I'm not
Speaker 1: going to Paradise. I was like, what, how could you? Like?
Speaker 1: Your storyline is so like perfect. And then here we
Speaker 1: are now when we're recording and Paradise is filming, and
Speaker 1: if you're with us unless like you're not telling us
Speaker 1: the truth and you're like, you know, obviously in a
Speaker 1: hotel room waiting to go to Paradise. I'm not a
Speaker 1: hotel room. You're not going back. Did you talk to
Speaker 1: producers about Paradise? No, Honestly, have no conversations this time
Speaker 1: about Paradise. I think I think they know and like
Speaker 1: it's just like not Paradise is just like not a
Speaker 1: fit for me, And like I wasn't even like, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's just it's not for me. You know, you got
Speaker 1: something against people that go to Paradise or something, Heather,
Speaker 1: I just don't feel like I have Like it's so
Speaker 1: like dating in general is just like I feel like
Speaker 1: I probably have issues with it, but like I feel
Speaker 1: like I'm like it would just to be it wouldn't
Speaker 1: be a good setting. Like I don't feel like it
Speaker 1: would be like a genuine setting for me to meet
Speaker 1: someone like I just wouldn't be myself. I think the
Speaker 1: consensus is that you're just you're too pure for that setting, right.
Speaker 1: I don't know that too here, but yeah, like it
Speaker 1: just isn't it isn't my like VI, it's it's definitely
Speaker 1: um extremely stressful. I found Paradise far more stressful than
Speaker 1: I did Bachelorette, and I'm sure Dean did too, because
Speaker 1: all the focuses on you. You know, there's no lead,
Speaker 1: so all the focuses on the contestants, and so you know,
Speaker 1: as you know, you're on camera so much on Bachelor,
Speaker 1: but in Paradise, you are cameras. There are cameras in
Speaker 1: the bedrooms, and so, like they don't turn the lights
Speaker 1: off until four, you know, whenever they turn it off,
Speaker 1: like three or four in the morning sometimes especially at
Speaker 1: the rose ceremonies, and it's just like and then you're
Speaker 1: up at eight o'clock in the morning. You're always on cameras,
Speaker 1: so you never truly know like kinda what's gonna be
Speaker 1: on camera, what's not gonna be on camera because you're
Speaker 1: always miked up, So what's gonna make it on TV?
Speaker 1: Am I gonna be part of the storyline? It's way
Speaker 1: more stressful, I found Plus that's yeah and high. It
Speaker 1: does like effect you like when you're like physically not comfortable.
Speaker 1: I feel like that has an effect. Do you feel
Speaker 1: like it could be yourself though, when you felt like
Speaker 1: the cameras are was that like and she or its
Speaker 1: like easy because you're just like I have to I
Speaker 1: found it, Indean, I want to know what you think
Speaker 1: about this. I found it. I was much more of
Speaker 1: myself as the camera as I got more used to it,
Speaker 1: Like definitely in Paradise sent out more myself than I
Speaker 1: did in Bachelor. I just because I was more used
Speaker 1: to the cameras. So even Bachelor I felt very comfortable. Um.
Speaker 1: I remember one time though, it was my second season
Speaker 1: in Paradise and I was with Carly, and this was
Speaker 1: when Carly and I weren't with anybody, and we were like,
Speaker 1: we were roasting everybody, and we were on the edge
Speaker 1: of the pool and we were just laughing our asses off, thinking,
Speaker 1: oh my god, we're totally gonna get villainized from this
Speaker 1: one conversation because we were just roasting everybody and we
Speaker 1: thought it was the funniest thing. But maybe not. It
Speaker 1: wouldn't have been that funny looking back on it watching it,
Speaker 1: but it never made air. So who knows. There's so
Speaker 1: much stuff that they have to pull from that, like anything,
Speaker 1: well not anything, but you think something's gonna make it
Speaker 1: and doesn't make it. But you are a lot more
Speaker 1: accountable for your actions down there, which is a good
Speaker 1: thing and a bad thing. I guess in a sense,
Speaker 1: I would say, uh, yeah, I definitely gotta let my
Speaker 1: f boy flag fly the first season, But you're just
Speaker 1: kind of more like relaxed. I don't know. I was
Speaker 1: more relaxed, I don't know, less focused, more relaxed, way
Speaker 1: more wey, way more drunk the first time, at least
Speaker 1: the second time. I didn't drink fortunately at all the
Speaker 1: second time. No sober guy the second time. A lot
Speaker 1: of I've noticed within my life a lot of the
Speaker 1: bad decisions that I make happen when I'm under the
Speaker 1: influence of alcohol. So, uh, you know, younger Dean didn't
Speaker 1: really seem to mind being drunk too much, but older
Speaker 1: Dean has a much more clear judgment these days. And
Speaker 1: don't get me wrong, it's still very bad judgment often,
Speaker 1: But when I'm sober and a lot I'm a lot
Speaker 1: more reasonable. I think you acknowledge that. Did you have
Speaker 1: to have any Drea to call me nerves going into
Speaker 1: math season? No, no drinking at all, Like I wasn't
Speaker 1: even like I could of like get, like, you know,
Speaker 1: a glass of wine. I honestly did not want to drink.
Speaker 1: I'm not a big drinker in general, but I didn't
Speaker 1: want to drink like that much at all on my
Speaker 1: first season. But then I was like, oh, I'd love
Speaker 1: a glass of wine before you know, I'm just about
Speaker 1: to do something insane, but I was I was driving before,
Speaker 1: so they didn't even let me have like, So, no,
Speaker 1: there was no drinking antle responsible of you. When the
Speaker 1: ash and I went down to get engaged, ash obviously
Speaker 1: wasn't sure we were getting engaged. I was trying to
Speaker 1: throw her off and so we're all our friends, so
Speaker 1: she didn't really know. But when we were driving down there,
Speaker 1: she was She had like three glasses of champagne. And
Speaker 1: we're not big drinkers either, but she likes having some,
Speaker 1: you know, champagne to kind of feel a little bit looser.
Speaker 1: And I'm like, oh my god, Ashley is gonna be
Speaker 1: wasted during her engagement. And at what point she grabbed
Speaker 1: the bottle and started drinking from the bottle, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: give me this thing. Okay. She was extremely nervous and
Speaker 1: I get it. I was like, good lord, just it's
Speaker 1: kind of surprising to you that she was nervous. She
Speaker 1: was nervous. She didn't know if she was about to
Speaker 1: be proposed to she was going on camera. It was
Speaker 1: a very weird moment. Anyway. One of my one of
Speaker 1: my favorite photos is of you on your knee asking
Speaker 1: her to marry you, and her like heels are dug
Speaker 1: into the sand. She see like standing flat footed, but
Speaker 1: she's wearing like four in chhields or something like that
Speaker 1: just looks so funny. Yeah, it's the most Ashley moment
Speaker 1: of all time. Oh yeah, all right, Well we do
Speaker 1: have a lot to talk about. Obviously, we're going to
Speaker 1: address address the Chris Harrison situation that happened this week.
Speaker 1: But before we get into that, let's take a quick break.
Speaker 1: All right, welcome back to help I suck at dating myself.
Speaker 1: Dean heaven Martin is here now listen. June nine was
Speaker 1: apparently National Sex Day. Uh, so we may have sex
Speaker 1: questions uh lined up for you. Heather and Dean all
Speaker 1: like very pg don't worry about it, all very fun
Speaker 1: stuff like you know, we're dating podcast. Obviously sex is
Speaker 1: a part of dating. So these are the things that
Speaker 1: we got to talk about. But first, on a little
Speaker 1: bit more of a sour note, I do want to
Speaker 1: address the Chris Harrison situation. Obviously, uh, you guys have
Speaker 1: all heard Chris Harrison has permanently exited the Bachelor franchise
Speaker 1: after nineteen seasons. UM. Chris gave an interview with Rachel
Speaker 1: Lindsay a little recap where he was debating defending Rachel
Speaker 1: Cornell when she went to an antebellum party. He was
Speaker 1: defending her, but it really looked like he was defending
Speaker 1: kind of the racism of act. Uh. And then he
Speaker 1: ended up leaving UM, not hosting after the final Rose
Speaker 1: on Matt James season, and then did not do Katie's season.
Speaker 1: It was announced that he was not coming back for Paradise,
Speaker 1: and now it was just announced that Chris Harrison will
Speaker 1: no longer be a part of the Bachelor franchise. And
Speaker 1: when this news dropped on Tuesday, I'm not I don't
Speaker 1: think it's hyperbole to say that this might be one
Speaker 1: of the biggest moments in the franchise's history. I've always,
Speaker 1: you know, ashe and I have always joked like, oh,
Speaker 1: I wonder when Chris will retire or when he'll leave,
Speaker 1: like will the show go on? What will happen afterwards?
Speaker 1: And now we're at this moment. Chris is no longer
Speaker 1: a part of the franchise, and it makes me wonder
Speaker 1: what where do you know, do they get a new host?
Speaker 1: What does the franchise look like moving forward? Um? You know,
Speaker 1: will it be as good without Chris? Um? For me,
Speaker 1: it makes me really sad that Chris is gone. I
Speaker 1: said from the beginning, I was always hoping that he'd
Speaker 1: be back and given an opportunity to get his job back.
Speaker 1: I think he grossly mishandled the interview. We've talked about
Speaker 1: this many times. We don't have to rehash that, but
Speaker 1: I don't think he should have lost his job. I
Speaker 1: wish he was given an opportunity to come back. Obviously
Speaker 1: he wasn't. Um. It seemed like the Bachelor didn't want
Speaker 1: him to come back for whatever reason. I don't really
Speaker 1: know why, Um, but they've moved on from him, and
Speaker 1: I wish nothing but the best for Chris. Um you
Speaker 1: know he's a good man. Uh, he's a friend. UM.
Speaker 1: You know we're we're close with Lauren Zima, his girlfriend
Speaker 1: as well. You know we love them together. Um. You
Speaker 1: know he's a dad. It seems like he got a
Speaker 1: pretty good payout from this um to make sure he
Speaker 1: didn't write a tell all. I don't really know these
Speaker 1: are what are um, but uh it sucks. It's just
Speaker 1: it's a changing of the guard. And uh. I wish that,
Speaker 1: uh he would stay in the Bachelor franchise, but he's not.
Speaker 1: And so that doesn't mean I don't want the friend
Speaker 1: the show to go away. I still support the show
Speaker 1: where I'm Ashley and I are friends with so many producers.
Speaker 1: I don't want anybody losing their job. I want the
Speaker 1: show to thrive. I think Hayleen and Tatition did an
Speaker 1: incredible job Night one. UM. I think they bring great
Speaker 1: energy to the show. I love watching them on my
Speaker 1: television screen. UM. I'm rooting for Katie. I hope she
Speaker 1: finds the man she can hopefully ultimately marry. But it
Speaker 1: makes me sad that Chris Harrison will no longer be
Speaker 1: a host of the show. And uh it sucks. And
Speaker 1: those are my thoughts on it. Great thoughts, Jared, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna go ahead and take the exact opposite approach on this.
Speaker 1: I don't agree with this somber attitude of being like, oh,
Speaker 1: guy lost his job. Bachelor franchise is never going to
Speaker 1: be the same. I mean, obviously, I don't have a
Speaker 1: dog in the race. I've never really been a fan
Speaker 1: of the show, not to say that I don't understand
Speaker 1: its presence in modern television whatever. And obviously I've been
Speaker 1: on the show so many times, Like, obviously, it kind
Speaker 1: of makes sense for me to have an opinion on it.
Speaker 1: I just like don't understand why everyone's so sad. It's like,
Speaker 1: Chris Harrison hosted the show for nineteen years, that a
Speaker 1: did a good enough job at it. The guy's walking
Speaker 1: away with fifty million dollars or however, but it's unreported, right,
Speaker 1: So it's like what I think it was eight figures
Speaker 1: is what everyone is saying. So we're assuming twenty five
Speaker 1: or fifty million dollars. That guy is not bumped, okay,
Speaker 1: He like, of course, he loved his job. He loved
Speaker 1: working for The Bachelor. He is laughing his way to
Speaker 1: the bank. Right now, And I don't think that there's
Speaker 1: any reason to feel bad for him. You know, you
Speaker 1: put nineteen hard years in a job. That's a long time,
Speaker 1: especially in today's job market. Whatever. So like I mean,
Speaker 1: I'm happy for Chris. I'm happy for the Bachelor franchise.
Speaker 1: I think it's a good necessary thing for a shake
Speaker 1: up to happen, and like you said, it was going
Speaker 1: to have to happen eventually, so now it's kind of like,
Speaker 1: in a weird way, like a win win, you know,
Speaker 1: the Bachelor franchise has kind of like a reason to
Speaker 1: hand it over to someone else, whoever that might be
Speaker 1: and whatever capacity. That looks like. Chris gets to make
Speaker 1: out like a Bandit gets all this money thrown his way,
Speaker 1: more time to play golf, spend time with his kids,
Speaker 1: which we all know he loves his kids, and it's
Speaker 1: just kind of like everyone kind of gets to move
Speaker 1: on in a weird way. So I like I personally
Speaker 1: am happy for everyone. I'm happy for Chris that he
Speaker 1: gets to take that money do whatever he wants with it.
Speaker 1: I'm happy for the show because now they kind of
Speaker 1: get to like test a couple of things out, see
Speaker 1: what works, see what doesn't work and eventually hand it
Speaker 1: over to someone full time. If that's what they plan
Speaker 1: on doing, happy for everyone else as well. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I just like I don't I failed to see the
Speaker 1: negatives in this. I hear, Yeah, I think it was more.
Speaker 1: I just I knew he wanted to come back. I
Speaker 1: knew he was putting the work in to come back,
Speaker 1: and the fact that he didn't get the opportunity to sucks.
Speaker 1: But I totally agree with you where he got a
Speaker 1: big payout for for everything reported. Uh So, I certainly
Speaker 1: don't feel that bad for him. If someone if someone
Speaker 1: came to me and they're like, hey, do we want
Speaker 1: to pay you twenty million dollars to never host another
Speaker 1: episode of Help, I sucit dating again, I would say
Speaker 1: thank you very much to be fair, graciously accept your offer.
Speaker 1: I think I think Chris Parson made a little bit
Speaker 1: more hosting the show than we do hosting this podcast.
Speaker 1: We're only three years into it. We got sixteen more
Speaker 1: years to go. We got most we had the nineteen
Speaker 1: year mark. You know, you don't know, you know that's right,
Speaker 1: We'll start making Chris money. Heather, do you have any
Speaker 1: thoughts about this? I think. I mean personally, when I
Speaker 1: heard about that, it's like it was a little sad.
Speaker 1: I feel like Chris brings, like I it's change is hard,
Speaker 1: Like I feel like I love the show, and I'm
Speaker 1: like Chris brings like a certain level of like I
Speaker 1: don't know if seriousness is the right word or grounded
Speaker 1: nous or like it just makes it more I don't know,
Speaker 1: reel in a way because he's like a dad and
Speaker 1: he's like I don't know, he like feels like equipped
Speaker 1: for that role and like he's just like he is
Speaker 1: the show in my head. Like when you think of
Speaker 1: the show, you think of Chris. So I feel like
Speaker 1: it was sad in a way for in that for
Speaker 1: like the viewers like, oh, it's gonna be Like I
Speaker 1: just feel like it's gonna be a different show. But
Speaker 1: at the same time, I was talking to my sister recently,
Speaker 1: even before this news conut, was like it's getting a
Speaker 1: little bit like it's been so long and there's in
Speaker 1: so many seasons, like there needs to be some sort
Speaker 1: of like change because it's like been the exact same
Speaker 1: thing over and over and over again. So maybe it'll
Speaker 1: be good. I don't know. It's weird. I mean, Tassia
Speaker 1: and Caitlin did so great. Uh, but there is just
Speaker 1: something so special about about Chris. I completely agree with you.
Speaker 1: There is this certain seriousness that he brings to the
Speaker 1: show that is needed, because it's a show that, when
Speaker 1: you look at the face of it, is absolutely ridiculous.
Speaker 1: It's like, hey, spend time, you know, ten hours with
Speaker 1: someone over the course of course of a few weeks
Speaker 1: and then you know, getting gaze at the end or
Speaker 1: however many hours to spend together. It's definitely more than ten.
Speaker 1: I'm dramatizing it, but my point is, you know, get
Speaker 1: to know someone for a month and a half and
Speaker 1: then propose on this ridiculous stage and then we're gonna
Speaker 1: throw you, you know, back into the real world and
Speaker 1: like good luck. Um, But Chris did such a good job,
Speaker 1: you know. And then of course in the meantime you
Speaker 1: have to deal with all this drama and all these
Speaker 1: storylines that are ridiculous and over the top. But Chris
Speaker 1: did bring a certain levity to the show that is
Speaker 1: much needed, and that makes me you know, I I
Speaker 1: love David Spade, I love Lance Bass, I love the
Speaker 1: idea of Little John. I think it's gonna be fun
Speaker 1: and entertaining, specifically in Paradise, but within Paradise, like there's
Speaker 1: still has to be that you know, seriousness to it
Speaker 1: of like, hey, you're about to propose, because that's what
Speaker 1: we all watched for. We watched for the drama, but
Speaker 1: we also watched for the relationships. So you know, as
Speaker 1: long as they do it well, I think Paradise could
Speaker 1: be really good, especially with the commentary between Lance Bass
Speaker 1: and David Spade a little job like it will be
Speaker 1: wildly entertaining. I just hope they still keep that. You know, hey,
Speaker 1: we're still trying to build you know, two people falling
Speaker 1: in love. Here. It feels like just a different show.
Speaker 1: There were a few moments where I was like going
Speaker 1: into it and I was like, whatever, this is all
Speaker 1: fun and joyous and blah blah blah, like whatever, like
Speaker 1: my usual idiotic self of like just thinking everything is
Speaker 1: always good. And then you see Chriss and he's like, Okay, Jean,
Speaker 1: this is a momentous occasion, very important decision you're about
Speaker 1: to make. And I'm like, oh, oh, yeah, I guess
Speaker 1: you're kind of right. This is a pretty important moment.
Speaker 1: And then he like he does bring it to your
Speaker 1: both your credits. He does bring like a very serious
Speaker 1: like you need to really consider your actions before you
Speaker 1: move forward here. Um, And I think that Tasha and Caitlin,
Speaker 1: at least so far as we've seen, they been more
Speaker 1: playful and kind of like lighthearted. I can imagine they'll
Speaker 1: probably make the be able to make the transition to
Speaker 1: be more serious serious, but I don't know. It'll be
Speaker 1: interesting to see how it all plays out. I agree. Um,
Speaker 1: So those are our thoughts about Chris Harrison. Obviously huge
Speaker 1: news within Bachelor Nation this week, so we're gonna see
Speaker 1: how it all plays out, and we're wishing, uh for
Speaker 1: me a personal I'm wishing Chris the best, and I'm
Speaker 1: also wishing the Bachelor of the best as well. But
Speaker 1: to segue into a much lighter topic, National Sex Day,
Speaker 1: Ladies and Gentlemen, June nine. I had no idea this
Speaker 1: was a thing, but apparently the reason National Sex Day
Speaker 1: is on June nine is because the date resembles That's right,
Speaker 1: you guessed at six nine, the old sixty nine. Good
Speaker 1: Lord obviously got to honor that holiday with some numbers. Um. Alright,
Speaker 1: so we figured, you know, let's talk about some sexy
Speaker 1: stuff on this podcast. Huh So, how the I want
Speaker 1: to get your thoughts and I'll go first. UM, sexual partners,
Speaker 1: Like the number of sexual partners that you have? Um?
Speaker 1: Is that something that you should be up front with
Speaker 1: somebody about or should you not mention it at all?
Speaker 1: We've talked about on this podcast before, like, hey, do
Speaker 1: you tell someone your number or not? I don't think
Speaker 1: it matters. What what do you you know Ashley's number,
Speaker 1: which is pretty convenient for you, Does you know yours? Uh? Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: he's got a ball parked it. You know, remember American
Speaker 1: Pie when they were like always when a girl tells
Speaker 1: you how many sexual partners they've had, times it by
Speaker 1: three and that's the actual number. And when a guy
Speaker 1: tells you how many sexual partners he's had, divided by
Speaker 1: three and that's the actual number. Um, that is not
Speaker 1: the case for me. I you know, we actually and
Speaker 1: I have talked about that. But I think sex is
Speaker 1: so overblown, man, I really do. It's important, but it's
Speaker 1: really not that important, especially someone who's married now. And
Speaker 1: you know, one of the best advice I ever got
Speaker 1: before I got married was listen, you know, intimacy is
Speaker 1: a part of a relationship, but don't also forget that
Speaker 1: this is the person you're going to have a conversation
Speaker 1: with every day for the rest of your And it's like,
Speaker 1: holy crap. Yeah, that's that's pretty heavy stuff right there.
Speaker 1: And um so I think whatever's in the past is
Speaker 1: in the past. That's in my eyes, Heather, what are
Speaker 1: your thoughts on it? I think as like a really
Speaker 1: I mean, I've obviously non extra in this, like this
Speaker 1: is not my um, you know, typical commort like forte.
Speaker 1: But I feel like as like the relationship progresses, like
Speaker 1: that's just like the type of topics that you talk
Speaker 1: about and like your values and like what's important to you.
Speaker 1: I don't think you necessarily need I think it's a
Speaker 1: case by case basis on like what you value and
Speaker 1: what you're looking for in a relationship. But like I
Speaker 1: don't think like specifically like this is a certain time
Speaker 1: you have to stay your numbers or anything like that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I agree. Would you ever ask, like your boyfriend exactly
Speaker 1: how many sexual partners you had or would you know
Speaker 1: that number before even being in a relationship with someone,
Speaker 1: do you think? I think that's just a conversation that
Speaker 1: would come up naturally, Like I don't think you'd be like,
Speaker 1: okay at this time, like now I'm gonna ask you exactly.
Speaker 1: I just like as you're having conversations and like connecting emotionally,
Speaker 1: like that's just like a topic that comes up. Well, Heather,
Speaker 1: for you, because you obviously went on national television, you
Speaker 1: were very open and honest about the fact that you
Speaker 1: had never been kissed. Had has people ever come up
Speaker 1: to you afterwards or d M do and said, hey,
Speaker 1: you know, I'm in the same boat. It's really like
Speaker 1: it was really great to see because Heather, you're a
Speaker 1: beautiful woman, like you have so much going for your
Speaker 1: charismatic You're pretty and so like obviously, when you said, hey,
Speaker 1: I've never been kissed, it's like, what the hell? Like,
Speaker 1: no guys that were just trying to kiss you, that's insane, um.
Speaker 1: And so I would imagine that a lot of people
Speaker 1: afterwards would reach out to you and say, hey, I'm
Speaker 1: you know, I've never been kissed either, and it's pretty
Speaker 1: awesome to know that, you know, I'm not. Well, for
Speaker 1: the record, I'm sure many guys have tried to kiss her.
Speaker 1: She's just a fair no, it had It was really cool.
Speaker 1: I think that was one of the main things that
Speaker 1: was like really cool. After it was like like a
Speaker 1: lot of girls, like younger girls like, oh my gosh,
Speaker 1: I've and so afraid and I did. I've been lying
Speaker 1: about it and I didn't want to tell people and
Speaker 1: thank you for saying now because it makes it me
Speaker 1: feel like less weird and less like it just makes
Speaker 1: me feel more normal and like I'm waiting for like
Speaker 1: the right person whatever. Um. And I was never my
Speaker 1: intention going and it was just like I can't believe
Speaker 1: that actually, like that was the thing, and like I
Speaker 1: shared that. Um. But yeah, and I think that was
Speaker 1: like one of the coolest parts coming out of the
Speaker 1: show was that, like the young girls like telling me
Speaker 1: like it helped them feel less weird. I guess, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I think that's a good point. Um, as long as
Speaker 1: you can touch one person. That's what I always say
Speaker 1: is if you can share a story and it can
Speaker 1: resonate with one person and help them out, and that's
Speaker 1: always worth sharing that story. Jared, back back to your
Speaker 1: original point, Uh, the sexual partners, whether it's important discuss
Speaker 1: it's funny because Kaylin and I have like sort of
Speaker 1: discussed it similar to you and Ashley. It's like, I know,
Speaker 1: it's kind of messed up in a weird way, like
Speaker 1: I know exactly how many sexual partners she's had, and
Speaker 1: she's got like a ballpark figure of how many I've had.
Speaker 1: Is that just like a guy and girl thing? I
Speaker 1: don't know, I guess, but uh, I kind of like
Speaker 1: I kind of like to tend to keep the ambiguity
Speaker 1: going in that sense. I'm not like proud of my number,
Speaker 1: although it does, you know, help to find me as
Speaker 1: a as an individual, so I guess I shouldn't be
Speaker 1: too self conscious about it, but it is what it is.
Speaker 1: I guess. Well, I mean I have to ask. You
Speaker 1: said you're not proud of your number? Are you willing
Speaker 1: to like share it? No? Absolutely not absolutely. You know
Speaker 1: if you don't ask, you'll never find out. I mean,
Speaker 1: there was just you know, my younger days, like I said, uh,
Speaker 1: when I let alcohol and all of that stuff kind
Speaker 1: of like take the lead as a little permiscus back then.
Speaker 1: Obviously tapered back of course ever since date in Kalin,
Speaker 1: but even before so it was kind of like it's
Speaker 1: kind of like, Okay, I'm getting too old for this,
Speaker 1: like I shouldn't be getting wasted and going to clubs
Speaker 1: all the time. Um that you know, that was kind
Speaker 1: of like the turning point, I guess. But but yeah,
Speaker 1: I know it's I mean, it's not you know, it's
Speaker 1: nothing crazy. It's not like it's not like in the
Speaker 1: six figures or anythink that, but it's it's it's you know,
Speaker 1: it's a number. Yeah. I'm just gonna let you keep talking.
Speaker 1: Interject to ask you another question about sex day June nine.
Speaker 1: Tell us more about it. Well, I one of a
Speaker 1: buddy of mine, uh once told me his number, and
Speaker 1: it was the stupidest thing I've ever heard. He said
Speaker 1: that he had slept with over a hundred people in
Speaker 1: his life. And I was like, holy crap, that's in
Speaker 1: that's that's insane. That's how how you know what I mean?
Speaker 1: I don't know. That was weird to me. Anyway, we
Speaker 1: don't talk about it. I don't know if Dean wants
Speaker 1: to divulge into that one, but I just thought it
Speaker 1: was cool. I thought it was you do you have
Speaker 1: an exact number? No? I also think like when you
Speaker 1: were talking about why do guys have more of a
Speaker 1: ballpark and it feels like girls know their number more.
Speaker 1: It's because I think that Unfortunately, if I'm if I'm generalizing, guys,
Speaker 1: you know, they viewed sex as more of uh uh
Speaker 1: you know flame that yeah, not a notch on the belt,
Speaker 1: but like it's not as big of a deal as
Speaker 1: I feel like girls, you know, feel towards it. You know,
Speaker 1: I think girls are taking much more seriously and take
Speaker 1: their time. Not all, but uh, if I'm generalizing, that's
Speaker 1: how I feel, And that's why I like, you know,
Speaker 1: certain girls know their exact number, and guys were like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I think it's like somewhere around you. I don't really know.
Speaker 1: You know. Also, guys are super insecure and they just
Speaker 1: try to deflect and just push everything else off. That's
Speaker 1: what I've found because I'm a guy and I've been
Speaker 1: wildly insecure in my life. So it's always like you're
Speaker 1: trying to build it up and be like, yeah, I
Speaker 1: think it's like somewhere around here. I don't really know.
Speaker 1: It's not a big deal or anything like that. I
Speaker 1: don't really care. Like, do you want it to be higher?
Speaker 1: You wanted to be lower? Well, I think my early
Speaker 1: years I wanted it to be higher. You know, I
Speaker 1: lost my virginity at nineteen, and like amongst my friend group,
Speaker 1: it wasn't like super late, but like I knew some
Speaker 1: of my friends that were sexually active in high school,
Speaker 1: and it was like I felt like Steve carl In
Speaker 1: the four year old virgin, like playing polkor with them,
Speaker 1: like yeah, boobs and sand bags, they're just like great
Speaker 1: and you know, like boobs aren't supposed to feel like sandbags. Um,
Speaker 1: So that was definitely, uh, yeah, it was. It was
Speaker 1: nerve ragging back then, being like a late bloomer and
Speaker 1: just being like, I don't know, guys, I feel like
Speaker 1: I'm the opposite because I've heard that that's statuo girls
Speaker 1: divide by three, guys multiplied by three. And I'm always
Speaker 1: kind of like, well, I whenever I am telling people
Speaker 1: my number or whatever, whenever I used to do it,
Speaker 1: I would always like cut in half, you know, like
Speaker 1: I would always say a lesser number than it was
Speaker 1: for whatever reason. I don't know. I guess I was
Speaker 1: always because you're always been ridiculously good looking and charming
Speaker 1: and never happen. That's not definitely not true. Like there
Speaker 1: were times like when I was a freshman in college.
Speaker 1: I think I was like way less sexually active than
Speaker 1: a lot of my peers where at the time. You
Speaker 1: know what I mean. I want to meet these peers
Speaker 1: where they just like sex every five minutes. Well, listen,
Speaker 1: in Colorado, it's handcuffing season six months out of the year,
Speaker 1: so it's like there's not much else to do other
Speaker 1: than four nic at college parties. Um, I'm just obviously
Speaker 1: making that up, but who knows. Yeah, that's kind of
Speaker 1: like some of the East Coast. It's like, you know,
Speaker 1: you want to be single for the summer type thing. Whatever,
Speaker 1: it doesn't matter anyway. I thought that was interesting. Natural
Speaker 1: Sex Day June nine? Check it out people. You know, Jared,
Speaker 1: did you have sex on National Sex Day this year?
Speaker 1: I did not? June nine. Let me let me double
Speaker 1: check that. Let me check my sex calendar real Quidnesday. Nope,
Speaker 1: did not. You're more like a Tuesday, Thursday, Saturday. All right,
Speaker 1: we gotta schedule everything ahead of time. It's like Friday,
Speaker 1: I record Saturday. Okay, we have time. We can do
Speaker 1: this now. Um, moving right along, what about like do
Speaker 1: you do you guys? Track? And again, too much information
Speaker 1: if you don't feel like sharing don't share. Do guys
Speaker 1: track Ashley like ovulation cycles and then you kind of
Speaker 1: like try to cram as much in as you can
Speaker 1: doing this. Yeah. Yeah, So we track her ovulations calendar
Speaker 1: whatever it is, and uh, you know, we make sure
Speaker 1: she's like, okay, I'm ovulating on this day. So like
Speaker 1: we're gonna have not to be t m I but whatever.
Speaker 1: This is what happens when you're trying to create life.
Speaker 1: It's like, okay, you know we're having sex like this
Speaker 1: day that day, this day, that day, and it's better
Speaker 1: if we have it in the morning on this day,
Speaker 1: better if we have it at night on this day.
Speaker 1: And it's like all right, cool, but I'll tell you.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm no spring chicken anymore. I'm not twenty one.
Speaker 1: So like on that fourth or fifth day, and you know,
Speaker 1: nine o'clock rolls around it, it's like, oh no, no, no no,
Speaker 1: we we gotta, we gotta. It's like, oh that's right,
Speaker 1: all right, let me, let me, let me take a shower,
Speaker 1: let me wake up. Hold on, She's like, okay, I
Speaker 1: have a glass of wine. Hey, you know what, it's married.
Speaker 1: You gotta do what you do. People have, you know,
Speaker 1: experience all the time, I had a buddy of mine
Speaker 1: text me and he said that there there during her ovulation,
Speaker 1: they had sex um five times a day, like in
Speaker 1: five days in a row. I was like, how how
Speaker 1: did you stand up? Are you insane? Does that even
Speaker 1: like does anything even like work? After two or three times,
Speaker 1: it's like it's all just like interesting. Yeah, I think
Speaker 1: Dean just dropped out. By the way, there goes his WiFi. Well,
Speaker 1: we were going to move along anyway, So this is
Speaker 1: a nice little segment before we get to emails. Um so, um, Heather,
Speaker 1: did you watch Tatia season? And did you watch Matt season?
Speaker 1: I'm assuming you watch a little bit of Matt season
Speaker 1: because we're yes, yes, I watched both. Okay, so we
Speaker 1: have a new Bachelor Nation couple. Apparently this is all
Speaker 1: in the rumor mill. So apparently, uh, Piper James and
Speaker 1: Brandon Morass. Uh. I hope that's that you say? His
Speaker 1: name is Brendon. Excuse me, damn? I think hopefully. I
Speaker 1: think you're right. Brendan and Piper apparently are dating and
Speaker 1: quote are super into each other. So, like I said,
Speaker 1: another love connection made in Bachelor Nation. Piper and Brendon
Speaker 1: have been dating for a few weeks now, a source
Speaker 1: told us Weekly. Either he'll fly to New York and
Speaker 1: hang out with her, or she'll fly to Boston. Because
Speaker 1: he's a Boston kid, which is why I like him.
Speaker 1: She was most recently in Boston over Moral Day weekend,
Speaker 1: so this was a couple of weeks ago and they
Speaker 1: were even spotted in public together. Uh. He's thirty one,
Speaker 1: she's twenty three. How do you feel about this, Heather?
Speaker 1: How do you feel about Piper Brendan dating each other?
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know either of them. Um, I
Speaker 1: mean I'm that Piper one time or twice actually, But
Speaker 1: that's great. Wait are they not and I'm confused? Are
Speaker 1: they not in Paradise? That's what I was thinking too
Speaker 1: when this article first came up. I thought, Oh, maybe
Speaker 1: it's a spoiler for Paradise and they're kind of releasing
Speaker 1: some of the couples that are already getting together to
Speaker 1: promote the show. But if they're flying to Austin and
Speaker 1: he's flying to New York, they're obviously not in Paradise.
Speaker 1: So what makes me think is that they were dating before. Okay,
Speaker 1: I remember Piper, Yeah, Piper is awesome. Yeah, Piper is beautiful, Okay.
Speaker 1: Uh So my assumption is that they were talking before
Speaker 1: the show and they're like, no, we are into each
Speaker 1: other and we want to date, uh you know, non
Speaker 1: in paradise because we're kind of committed to each other.
Speaker 1: Which makes me so freaking happy because how many times
Speaker 1: have we seen, specifically over the past couple of years,
Speaker 1: so many Bachelor contestants talking before they go on the show,
Speaker 1: and they already know each other, so you're not seeing
Speaker 1: the meat on camera for the first time, and it's
Speaker 1: just less dramatic because of that, and there's like it's
Speaker 1: not a natural evolution of love because they've already hung out,
Speaker 1: and they've hung out with multiple people and there's already drama.
Speaker 1: Obviously saw that was Blake a couple of years ago.
Speaker 1: So I'm super happy that they were like, no, I'm
Speaker 1: not going we're dating each other. That. I feel like
Speaker 1: it's a big deal in saying that they because like
Speaker 1: I feel like, for sure both of them would have
Speaker 1: been on Paradise, So if they're not there, then that
Speaker 1: that's really saying that they really like each other, because
Speaker 1: that's a big I mean, I feel like that's like
Speaker 1: they're sacrificing something by not going on the show. You know,
Speaker 1: I agree, Dean. Do you have any thoughts Piper Brendan
Speaker 1: dating in real life? I r L. I don't know
Speaker 1: either of those people are okay. Brendan was the Boston
Speaker 1: guy from Tastious Season three, three third done. I think, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: he's a Boston guy, so you already know he's awesome. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I remember him. I remember Taia is like final three
Speaker 1: guys were super handsome. They were all like male models.
Speaker 1: I feel like he's actually a commercial roofer, which makes
Speaker 1: me love him oh so much. God, why what what
Speaker 1: about being a roofer? Because no, it's just like rolling
Speaker 1: up your sleeves and like, he's an East Coast guy.
Speaker 1: He's thirty one, he's a hard worker. He's blue collar,
Speaker 1: like I freaking love like. For example, so we Ashley
Speaker 1: and I got invited to Doug Flutie's charity event called
Speaker 1: in His foundation is called the Flutie Foundation, and it's
Speaker 1: an incredible um charity that works with kids with autism.
Speaker 1: And uh, Paul Wallburg, so Mark and Donnie Wallburg's brother,
Speaker 1: who's like the main guy for the wall Burgers, the
Speaker 1: burger chain. He was catering the event, and this guy
Speaker 1: is his brother, is Mark and Donnie. This guy is
Speaker 1: definitely worth. He's a multi millionaire um, and here he is,
Speaker 1: he's catering the event. And this guy was like, had
Speaker 1: thirty cheeseburgers on the grill. He's putting cheese on there
Speaker 1: and he's flipping. He's making burgers and he's just got
Speaker 1: his hat on loan. He's grinded away. And I'm like,
Speaker 1: this guy is a wallburg This guy is Mark and
Speaker 1: Donnie's brother. He's the CEO of wall Burgers. He's definitely
Speaker 1: a multi millionaire, and here he is just like grinding away,
Speaker 1: And I'm like, there is something to be said about that.
Speaker 1: And not to say that Brendan's on the same level
Speaker 1: as Paul Wahlberg, but like to be on The Bachelorette
Speaker 1: and still be a commercial roofer and to say no
Speaker 1: to Paradise, which we're all assuming he did, I don't know.
Speaker 1: I think that says something about his character. And I
Speaker 1: like it, and Piper too, because Piper definitely was going
Speaker 1: to be on and she said no, And I love that.
Speaker 1: I love that they said. I feel like that's super
Speaker 1: super right. I feel like people meet up all the time,
Speaker 1: but like they value going on the show more than actually,
Speaker 1: you know, saying something in real life. So I think
Speaker 1: that's I'm really assurable for both of them, if that's
Speaker 1: actually what's happening. I agree. So I don't know Piper either,
Speaker 1: so I don't really have much of an opinion on
Speaker 1: this story, but I'm glad you guys are so passionate
Speaker 1: about it. It's another Bachelor Nation coupleman. We hope they
Speaker 1: make it all right. And before we go to break, Heather,
Speaker 1: did you watch Katie's uh first episode? I did? All right,
Speaker 1: who are your front runners? Who do you like? I like? Okay,
Speaker 1: Greg is for sure like the front runner in my head.
Speaker 1: The first compression of this guy, Um, she really liked
Speaker 1: the cat guy, which, okay, did you did you guys
Speaker 1: do a weird Did you guys both watch it? Yeah?
Speaker 1: I love when they were kissing now and his paws
Speaker 1: were on her face. I just felt weird. I was like,
Speaker 1: it's extremely cringe worthy. That feels wrong. Take the gloves
Speaker 1: off from But those two I feel like are the
Speaker 1: um fronts in my head. I agree. Greg was really great.
Speaker 1: He obviously got the first impression Rose but I Connor
Speaker 1: Connor B was his name, the guy who arrived into
Speaker 1: cac costume. Uh, he's a math teacher as well. I
Speaker 1: just found this out. That makes me like him a lot.
Speaker 1: And he was. He was adorable. Yeah. And you know,
Speaker 1: if you show up in a cacostume, I guess you
Speaker 1: could either be adorable or the curupious man alive. So
Speaker 1: thank you God it worked out for Connor B. We
Speaker 1: do have an email coming up um from anonymous obviously
Speaker 1: our famous, famous, and favorite emailer of all times, to
Speaker 1: make sure you tune in for that. But before we
Speaker 1: get into an email, we're gonna take a quick break.
Speaker 1: Welcome back to help I Suck at Dating myself, Dean Heather,
Speaker 1: we have emails, our favorite part, Dean's favorite part of
Speaker 1: the podcast. It is, truthfully the only part. It's the
Speaker 1: only reason I sign on for this podcast is emails.
Speaker 1: He stays listening to my bullshit. It's not it's not
Speaker 1: to see you. It's not to listen to you. Heather,
Speaker 1: You're great. It's not why I'm here. It's the emailers.
Speaker 1: For the emailers, keep me interested in this podcast. Please
Speaker 1: email us at I Suck it Dating at iHeart media
Speaker 1: dot com. We love hearing from you and just any
Speaker 1: time we hear a great juicy story, it is literally
Speaker 1: it breathes life into my lungs, so keep them coming.
Speaker 1: I suck at dating at I heeart media dot com.
Speaker 1: Mark are you there? Do you want to read this
Speaker 1: email for us? Right here? And it's a complicated one.
Speaker 1: Just to warn you what it is from anonymous. I
Speaker 1: have two different scenarios I'd like advice on. So I've
Speaker 1: been stuck in kind of a Jarrit and Ashley situation
Speaker 1: for about a year and a bit. We met on Bumble.
Speaker 1: We were friends for a while, and then I caught
Speaker 1: feelings and he was hung up on someone else, and
Speaker 1: it was kind of weird not dating but also acting
Speaker 1: like we were dating for a while. A few months ago,
Speaker 1: I said, I'm done with this confusion. I just want
Speaker 1: to be your friend. At that point, I was ready
Speaker 1: to start moving on, but saying this made him realize
Speaker 1: he wanted me more. However, at the same time I
Speaker 1: started to move on, one of my college roommates confessed
Speaker 1: he had caught feelings for me after living together for
Speaker 1: a semester. After my roommate confessed his feelings, we started
Speaker 1: getting much closer and we ended up hooking up. Now
Speaker 1: I'm in a place where he has really strong feelings
Speaker 1: for me, but I don't quite feel the same way.
Speaker 1: My love life has been kind of a hot mess
Speaker 1: for a while, and I'm gonna take my summer at
Speaker 1: home to get my life together. But I have a
Speaker 1: few questions. One, how do I create enough space romantically
Speaker 1: with my roommate while also retaining a good friendship this summer.
Speaker 1: To how do I truly trust the original guy after
Speaker 1: having him reject me for solo on Well, I guess
Speaker 1: I'll take that's it. That's Jared. You take a seatback,
Speaker 1: take a step back. I get a seat and let
Speaker 1: me answer this one. Okay, So here's what you're gonna
Speaker 1: have to do. You're just gonna have to lay it
Speaker 1: all out for everyone involved. I think we stress it
Speaker 1: all the time on this podcast. Communication is the most
Speaker 1: important thing. Communication. Communication, communication. So tell this guy that
Speaker 1: you're living with the roommate that caught feelings that you
Speaker 1: hooked up with, exactly where you stand and say, hey,
Speaker 1: this is fun. I like you, but I don't like
Speaker 1: you enough to really commit to a relationship at the moment.
Speaker 1: If that's what you're looking for. I don't know. Blah
Speaker 1: blah blah. He might be a little hurt, You might
Speaker 1: be a little upset, but it's a lot less upset
Speaker 1: than he would be if you lead him on and
Speaker 1: break his heart later on. So tell him that. That's
Speaker 1: my first bit of advice. What do you guys think
Speaker 1: of that? How do you want to go? I totally agree,
Speaker 1: I think you have to. I think if they're feeling like,
Speaker 1: like unsure and they've already like been with them, know them,
Speaker 1: I think maybe that's not the first I feel like,
Speaker 1: at least for me, that's typically like sometimes they like to.
Speaker 1: I feel like, Jared, you might have a different situation.
Speaker 1: You've had a different situation with actually them, Like if
Speaker 1: they've lived together for so long and they she's still
Speaker 1: like unsure, I'm like, maybe you just don't like them,
Speaker 1: and this the honest And I totally agree. I think
Speaker 1: you should just communicate and just be upfront, totally about
Speaker 1: how you feel. Totally right. But our opinion Heather doesn't
Speaker 1: matter quite as much in the scenario because, as this
Speaker 1: email are mentioned at the top, she's got herself a
Speaker 1: Jared Nashley situation. Have you not learned from three years
Speaker 1: of the podcast that I have no idea what the
Speaker 1: hell I'm talking about. But anyway, I'm gonna answer this anyway. Anyway, anyway,
Speaker 1: I don't think i've said it anyway enough, listen, Anonymous.
Speaker 1: I think with the guy that you like but who
Speaker 1: has rejected you for so long but now is coming around,
Speaker 1: you need to give him an ultimatum. We always talk
Speaker 1: about ultimatums on this podcast. Sometimes they work, sometimes they don't.
Speaker 1: I think in this case it's going to be beneficial
Speaker 1: for everybody. You talk to this guy and you say, hey, listen,
Speaker 1: I know you're starting to come around. That's great. I
Speaker 1: still have feelings for you. If you want to do this,
Speaker 1: I'm in you want to be boyfriend girlfriend, let's do it.
Speaker 1: But I need a commitment. If you cannot give me
Speaker 1: a commitment, then we need to go our separate ways
Speaker 1: because it's not gonna end well and I'm going to
Speaker 1: be confused and you're gonna be upset, and it's not
Speaker 1: gonna be good. So give him an ultimatum and say, hey, listen,
Speaker 1: this is how I feel for the roommate. I think
Speaker 1: you have to be the bigger person. And like Dean
Speaker 1: and Heather said, communicate with them and let them know
Speaker 1: exactly where you're at. But that's gonna also entail you
Speaker 1: telling this roommate, I'm not where you are. I don't
Speaker 1: have the same feelings for you that you do for me.
Speaker 1: That doesn't mean I don't think you're an incredible human being.
Speaker 1: I would still love to be friends. But if you
Speaker 1: can't be you know, if you can't get there with me,
Speaker 1: we're we're just on a friendship level, then maybe it's
Speaker 1: best that we I don't know, you know, take a
Speaker 1: little bit of break and you know, I figure out
Speaker 1: my stuff, you figure out your stuff, and maybe we
Speaker 1: can be friends in the future. That's what I think
Speaker 1: you should do. But the biggest thing I think you
Speaker 1: should do is give this guy, the other guy, the
Speaker 1: guy that you like who's finally starting to come around,
Speaker 1: an ultimatum. Well, let's flip this around real quick and
Speaker 1: apply a practical scenario to it, because in your situation again,
Speaker 1: she's calling to Jared Nashley situation. I don't recall Ashley
Speaker 1: ever giving you an ultimatum. I mean she did when
Speaker 1: she started dating another guy. You know, she never verbalized it.
Speaker 1: To me. But I guess I took it upon myself
Speaker 1: to know that she's dating someone else. So if I'm
Speaker 1: serious about this, I have to be all in. I
Speaker 1: can't be wishy washy like I've been for the past
Speaker 1: few years. I need to commit. But then here's the thing.
Speaker 1: If she wants to use your relationship with Ashley as
Speaker 1: a blueprint for it, then she should date the roommate.
Speaker 1: Let this other guy that she really likes kind of
Speaker 1: get the hint that she's not here to mess around.
Speaker 1: Maybe he'll come around eventually, you know what I mean. Like,
Speaker 1: she's kind of got to like show this other guy
Speaker 1: she really likes that she's a hot commodity and she's
Speaker 1: not going to just wait around for this guy totally.
Speaker 1: But yeah, the roommate, she doesn't like it. It really
Speaker 1: sounds like she doesn't like it. Yeah, the roommate's gonna
Speaker 1: get thrown under the bus if she does that again again.
Speaker 1: All I can keep coming back to is the Jared
Speaker 1: Nati situation, similar to actually actually didn't like the roommate.
Speaker 1: You know, in this case, Anonymous doesn't like the roommates.
Speaker 1: Sometimes you gotta kiss a few frogs to find your
Speaker 1: Prince Charming. Yeah, I mean listen and honest if you
Speaker 1: want to listen to Dean and be soulness and really
Speaker 1: just ruin this person's life by pretending you like them
Speaker 1: to try to get someone else, I think you should
Speaker 1: do it. But Jared, would an ultimatum work? Would have?
Speaker 1: Would that have worked just as well? And I think
Speaker 1: that the other one worked better. I mean, obviously it
Speaker 1: worked out really well in my situation because it came
Speaker 1: very naturally, like she never approached me and said, you know,
Speaker 1: either we date or we don't talk. Um. I do
Speaker 1: think that would have worked, because honestly, there was a
Speaker 1: time in our friendship about a year and a half
Speaker 1: in where we she did vocalize that a little bit
Speaker 1: and it was like, let's go our set, like we
Speaker 1: just need to go our separate ways for a while,
Speaker 1: and then we didn't talk for a couple of weeks,
Speaker 1: and then we started talking and and then like fell
Speaker 1: into the friendship thing again. So I do think if
Speaker 1: she gave me an ultimatum, it probably would have worked.
Speaker 1: So but unfortunately, Anonymous, if you do the ultimatum, you
Speaker 1: also have to understand that he could say no and
Speaker 1: let you know that I don't want to be in
Speaker 1: a committed relationship with you, But again, isn't that best
Speaker 1: case scenario? Also, because then you know, then you know,
Speaker 1: and then you can move on and you can forget
Speaker 1: about this guy and you can figure out other things.
Speaker 1: Because I just feel like there's so many times I
Speaker 1: hear from my friends and I've done it too, where
Speaker 1: it's like three, four or five years of this like
Speaker 1: juggling act where it's like, wow, we're dating, but we're
Speaker 1: not really dating. And then we were, you know, committed
Speaker 1: to each other for four months, and then we broke
Speaker 1: it off and now we're back together, and then I
Speaker 1: just feel like those situations never end up in a
Speaker 1: long term, happy relationship. Yeah. I mean, I guess you
Speaker 1: heard it straight from the horse. Given the ultimatum, hope
Speaker 1: for the best, expect the worst. This is all good advice.
Speaker 1: I'm a little confused about who she wants to be with,
Speaker 1: Like we're talking about this guy and playing this guy
Speaker 1: against each other. I think spending the summer away is
Speaker 1: a great idea and to take a couple of weeks
Speaker 1: just figure out do I want to be with this
Speaker 1: guy who I like but doesn't like me. That so much,
Speaker 1: or do the other guy who I do like. But
Speaker 1: I think it's better to just figure out and focus
Speaker 1: on one of these guys and then, yes, all the
Speaker 1: communication needs to happen, but I think she needs to
Speaker 1: spend some time herself first to figure out what her
Speaker 1: path is. Yeah, well, said Mark, I think that's We
Speaker 1: can always say whatever we want to say, but at
Speaker 1: the end of the day, Mark's opinion is really the
Speaker 1: one that matters. Is there any other emails that we have?
Speaker 1: Are is that the only email we have? That's all Dan,
Speaker 1: I'm very sorry to tell you that might be time
Speaker 1: for another one of your pet email requests. Well, you guys,
Speaker 1: please email us. I suck at dating at iHeart media
Speaker 1: dot com. Give me a reason to show up next week.
Speaker 1: I just have Jared and Mark and Heather and that's
Speaker 1: perfectly fine too, but you know, just to email us,
Speaker 1: email us what's going on. Um, that's gonna probably do
Speaker 1: it for this week's episode. Then if we don't have
Speaker 1: any more emailers, right, Jared, that will do it. Absolutely
Speaker 1: A big thank you too, of course, Heather Martin Lady,
Speaker 1: let's give her a little clap ladies and gentlemen for
Speaker 1: joining us. On this podcast. Unfortunately Dean, his host is
Speaker 1: holding the mic in one hand, so he gave you
Speaker 1: like a little thumb and fingure. Uh you know you're
Speaker 1: in San Diego right now? Where can people find you
Speaker 1: on Instagram? Yeah? But I had my Instagram at Heather
Speaker 1: m twenty two and then uh me and my sisters
Speaker 1: just started the business too, which has been fun. And
Speaker 1: that is at Tilted three. So what is it again?
Speaker 1: It's like tusted customized little Peril and like loungewere okay,
Speaker 1: very cool such shirts and stuff. So yeah, it's been fun.
Speaker 1: It's really fun. And where can people find it? Again?
Speaker 1: So it's Tilted three, Tilted three okay Tilted three dot
Speaker 1: com and then at tilted on Instagram. So at Tilted
Speaker 1: my eyes peeled for our goody box that you're going
Speaker 1: to send all the other I'd love to your personalized
Speaker 1: help my second dating sut don't tease us like that. Fantastic,
Speaker 1: I'm on it. I am on it right now, all right.
Speaker 1: I love it perfect, Heather, Thank you so much. You
Speaker 1: have to come back on the podcast more frequently because
Speaker 1: it's too and frequent right now. Yes, well, thank you
Speaker 1: much for having me so fun Oh my god. Of course, Dean,
Speaker 1: thank you for being you. Hopefully you're back next week
Speaker 1: when more emails come in. People I need Dean. Dean
Speaker 1: is like the talent on the show. I just I
Speaker 1: talked nonsense. So if you want Dean, say email. You
Speaker 1: know it's true. Email the show. I suck at Dating
Speaker 1: on our heart radio dot com and that's gonna do it.
Speaker 1: So make sure Jared, this is why we're not getting emails.
Speaker 1: It's I Sucking Dating at iHeart media dot com, not
Speaker 1: I Heart radio dot com radio. Oh my god, no
Speaker 1: wonder we're not getting a week. I'm ben giving you
Speaker 1: guys the email for three years now. Email us at
Speaker 1: I suck at Dating at I heart media dot com.
Speaker 1: We love hearing your stories, we love answering your questions.
Speaker 1: We probably do a horrible job doing it, but please
Speaker 1: just keep indulging us and make sure you guys tune
Speaker 1: in next week, where hopefully we all suck just a
Speaker 1: little less, just a little bit less. Follow help by
Speaker 1: Suck at Dating on I Heart Radio or wherever you
Speaker 1: listen to podcast