1
00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:11,760
Speaker 1: The Nicky Glazer po Nycer here, Nicky, Hello here I am.

2
00:00:11,920 --> 00:00:15,400
Speaker 1: It's Nicki Glaser podcast. Welcome to the show. It's Tuesday.

3
00:00:15,760 --> 00:00:20,400
Speaker 1: Does anyone listen to our show at more than the speed? No,

4
00:00:23,079 --> 00:00:26,040
Speaker 1: I don't know your parts. Yeah. Maybe they go and

5
00:00:26,079 --> 00:00:29,320
Speaker 1: take talking down somehow. That would take a lot of editing.

6
00:00:29,320 --> 00:00:33,400
Speaker 1: You could do point five so that it sounds like

7
00:00:34,000 --> 00:00:36,559
Speaker 1: but you on point five would be, hey, what's going on?

8
00:00:36,600 --> 00:00:38,280
Speaker 1: Is Nicky Glazer? We're going to be here? I would

9
00:00:38,280 --> 00:00:42,840
Speaker 1: sound like I was doing a commentating a horse race. Um,

10
00:00:43,120 --> 00:00:44,959
Speaker 1: an auction and a horse race at the same Were

11
00:00:44,960 --> 00:00:49,320
Speaker 1: you always a speed talker? No, you would have to

12
00:00:49,360 --> 00:00:52,879
Speaker 1: ask my parents, who didn't really listen to me. So, um,

13
00:00:52,960 --> 00:00:56,600
Speaker 1: I think we'll never know. No, Um they did, I think, Yeah,

14
00:00:56,600 --> 00:00:59,720
Speaker 1: I was always because your dad speaks slow. My dad

15
00:00:59,760 --> 00:01:03,120
Speaker 1: does speaks slow. Um. What I was as a kid

16
00:01:03,240 --> 00:01:08,039
Speaker 1: was always being told not by teachers because I was

17
00:01:08,160 --> 00:01:11,880
Speaker 1: very like at school, never talked and like was just

18
00:01:12,280 --> 00:01:14,560
Speaker 1: didn't want to be seen. But at home or a

19
00:01:14,640 --> 00:01:18,640
Speaker 1: restaurants with my family, especially in my adolescence, like it

20
00:01:18,760 --> 00:01:22,399
Speaker 1: was always nick and it would be and it was

21
00:01:22,440 --> 00:01:24,440
Speaker 1: never like I was yelling like fuck you bit it

22
00:01:24,440 --> 00:01:26,800
Speaker 1: was always like, I got this thing today and it

23
00:01:26,880 --> 00:01:29,080
Speaker 1: was so like I was excited, and then it was

24
00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:31,600
Speaker 1: just it just really depletes the air in your sales

25
00:01:32,080 --> 00:01:35,000
Speaker 1: when someone you're telling a story that you're excited about

26
00:01:35,360 --> 00:01:39,440
Speaker 1: and then people go and then you just go, Okay,

27
00:01:39,480 --> 00:01:42,520
Speaker 1: never mind, I got a partner, apply that's matter, and

28
00:01:42,600 --> 00:01:45,640
Speaker 1: then you do the whole thing. I like, because it's

29
00:01:45,640 --> 00:01:48,360
Speaker 1: embarrassing how loud, because other people are staring and I

30
00:01:48,440 --> 00:01:51,840
Speaker 1: wasn't aware of people like other people. Maybe how loud

31
00:01:51,880 --> 00:01:53,800
Speaker 1: I was. I probably needed it my ears cleaned out.

32
00:01:54,640 --> 00:01:55,960
Speaker 1: They're like, why don't you just tell us a story

33
00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:58,880
Speaker 1: at home? You had to wait for an audience at Bennigan's.

34
00:01:59,480 --> 00:02:02,680
Speaker 1: I mean every time we walk our dog in the subdivision,

35
00:02:03,640 --> 00:02:06,920
Speaker 1: because I just get excited about something gets too loud. Um,

36
00:02:07,600 --> 00:02:09,760
Speaker 1: do you know that your Trifecta meals are still downstairs?

37
00:02:10,800 --> 00:02:12,919
Speaker 1: Those are done. I'm going to throw them away today.

38
00:02:13,480 --> 00:02:15,640
Speaker 1: I waited too long. Well, can I take them? I'll

39
00:02:15,680 --> 00:02:17,720
Speaker 1: give them to my mom. She will totally eat those.

40
00:02:18,320 --> 00:02:20,480
Speaker 1: They're still good. She just ate your Trifecta meals that

41
00:02:20,520 --> 00:02:23,120
Speaker 1: you gave her a while back. She's like she was

42
00:02:23,160 --> 00:02:24,919
Speaker 1: texting me from the river. And she's like, we're down

43
00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:27,720
Speaker 1: at the river, can I have Andrew's trifecta meals getting

44
00:02:27,760 --> 00:02:30,320
Speaker 1: next tided? So like she just freezes them and eats

45
00:02:30,400 --> 00:02:33,600
Speaker 1: them and that fine. Look, it's fine. They've been sitting

46
00:02:33,680 --> 00:02:37,320
Speaker 1: without Like, no, you open that thing, they'll they'll still

47
00:02:37,320 --> 00:02:40,680
Speaker 1: have refrigeration in those ice packs. But I always benefit

48
00:02:40,800 --> 00:02:44,280
Speaker 1: from boys and people who don't know butter just airing

49
00:02:44,320 --> 00:02:47,519
Speaker 1: on the side of like Chris brings stuff over to

50
00:02:47,639 --> 00:02:50,959
Speaker 1: my house and is I don't get rewarded from that

51
00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:53,079
Speaker 1: because he brings over like eggs and he'll leave them

52
00:02:53,320 --> 00:02:55,160
Speaker 1: two days and he'll be like, oh, no, they're bad now,

53
00:02:55,200 --> 00:02:59,200
Speaker 1: and I'm like, no, they're not. It's an exaggeration. But

54
00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:02,720
Speaker 1: like at like I just don't believe in unless something

55
00:03:02,800 --> 00:03:05,480
Speaker 1: smells bad and taste bad. Yeah you're a dumpster driver,

56
00:03:05,800 --> 00:03:08,880
Speaker 1: Yeah totally. But now I'm going to get free trigefactor

57
00:03:08,880 --> 00:03:14,680
Speaker 1: feels for my mom because who's head there just a discount.

58
00:03:14,880 --> 00:03:16,800
Speaker 1: My dad will have to carry them and maybe break

59
00:03:16,840 --> 00:03:19,680
Speaker 1: it back because those are heavy. But he was riding

60
00:03:19,720 --> 00:03:26,680
Speaker 1: his bike in thirty degree weathers man, that's crazy. Listen,

61
00:03:26,720 --> 00:03:29,280
Speaker 1: the gang never sleeps if he if he doesn't do

62
00:03:29,360 --> 00:03:30,799
Speaker 1: that what's he gonna He's gonna wake up with to

63
00:03:30,880 --> 00:03:37,280
Speaker 1: a fucking talking ship? Yeah, all those old men talking ship. Yeah,

64
00:03:37,360 --> 00:03:40,360
Speaker 1: he rode his bike yesterday. I went running yesterday at

65
00:03:40,400 --> 00:03:43,040
Speaker 1: like what time was that? I saw you? Seven thirty

66
00:03:43,520 --> 00:03:48,040
Speaker 1: because it gets so I love summer how dark it

67
00:03:48,160 --> 00:03:50,240
Speaker 1: gets so late. We were in Idaho, it got dark

68
00:03:50,320 --> 00:03:54,840
Speaker 1: at nine forty the sunset and nine forty. That's exciting.

69
00:03:55,520 --> 00:03:57,640
Speaker 1: Sometimes I want night time to come. I love it

70
00:03:57,720 --> 00:04:00,840
Speaker 1: so much because I'm always pushing runs till the last second,

71
00:04:01,280 --> 00:04:03,200
Speaker 1: and I can't run at night. So I just love

72
00:04:03,320 --> 00:04:06,160
Speaker 1: when it's like I checked my clock and I'm like, oh,

73
00:04:06,240 --> 00:04:08,040
Speaker 1: it's six o'clock, i gotta go for a run or

74
00:04:08,080 --> 00:04:10,200
Speaker 1: I'm not going to exercise today. And then it's like, wait,

75
00:04:10,800 --> 00:04:14,080
Speaker 1: the sun says at eight forty, I have another two hours.

76
00:04:14,560 --> 00:04:17,000
Speaker 1: We saw you right before your run yesterday. Yeah, it

77
00:04:17,040 --> 00:04:20,560
Speaker 1: didn't go well. It's just like it's so hot out

78
00:04:20,800 --> 00:04:23,039
Speaker 1: that in my body already felt like bags of soup,

79
00:04:23,240 --> 00:04:25,880
Speaker 1: just like I was too depressed to like have energy.

80
00:04:26,480 --> 00:04:29,440
Speaker 1: Sometimes your body just like my my body was fine.

81
00:04:29,600 --> 00:04:32,680
Speaker 1: My mind was just like so I did two and

82
00:04:32,680 --> 00:04:35,200
Speaker 1: a half miles, but then I'd stopped just there was

83
00:04:35,279 --> 00:04:38,560
Speaker 1: no There was no like I'm exhausted, There was no

84
00:04:38,760 --> 00:04:41,320
Speaker 1: like should I stop? Should I not? It was just

85
00:04:41,440 --> 00:04:44,560
Speaker 1: like shutting down MS stop. And then I pulled up

86
00:04:44,560 --> 00:04:46,719
Speaker 1: my Lime Scooter app and I found a Lime scooter

87
00:04:46,760 --> 00:04:48,760
Speaker 1: and I scooed my way out of the park than

88
00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:51,680
Speaker 1: the other two would have miles. Yeah, we walked to

89
00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:55,000
Speaker 1: get that ice cream down the street. It's really good

90
00:04:55,040 --> 00:04:59,600
Speaker 1: ice cream. It's like insanely good. Jenny's that the name

91
00:04:59,600 --> 00:05:04,880
Speaker 1: of im. I can walk into the same place you

92
00:05:04,920 --> 00:05:07,600
Speaker 1: always say, the Italian restaurant, the Mexican place. Yeah, the

93
00:05:07,680 --> 00:05:11,360
Speaker 1: ice cream shop. I believe it's Jenny's. Yeah, I think it's.

94
00:05:11,520 --> 00:05:14,360
Speaker 1: It's it's like you know, across the country. Oh it is.

95
00:05:14,680 --> 00:05:17,320
Speaker 1: Oh I thought it was like a St. Louis thing. No,

96
00:05:17,640 --> 00:05:19,520
Speaker 1: I don't think it is. But it's across from Mission

97
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:21,120
Speaker 1: Talk if you want to go to it in the

98
00:05:21,200 --> 00:05:26,800
Speaker 1: central Western another. Yeah, I mean not feel refreshing in

99
00:05:26,880 --> 00:05:31,440
Speaker 1: the heat. It like cream. It did for like two

100
00:05:31,560 --> 00:05:34,760
Speaker 1: minutes and then it melts and then it's like warm cream.

101
00:05:35,040 --> 00:05:39,960
Speaker 1: Oh God, my stomach is twirling the houses, the streets

102
00:05:40,040 --> 00:05:46,240
Speaker 1: by Jenny's. It's fucking insane. I just want to say, though, like,

103
00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:49,120
Speaker 1: let's say I didn't know you, I just knew of you.

104
00:05:50,160 --> 00:05:52,520
Speaker 1: I wish that I would have seen a celebrity in

105
00:05:52,560 --> 00:05:54,760
Speaker 1: a park riding a Lime scooter because I feel like

106
00:05:54,839 --> 00:05:56,760
Speaker 1: whenever I lived in New York and I would see

107
00:05:56,880 --> 00:05:59,320
Speaker 1: like celebs on the street, they would just be like

108
00:06:00,040 --> 00:06:06,440
Speaker 1: on Broadway to a show and like, yeah, yeah, you

109
00:06:06,520 --> 00:06:09,560
Speaker 1: never see them doing anything except walking, you know, with

110
00:06:09,680 --> 00:06:11,640
Speaker 1: like a hand that wasn't There was no part of

111
00:06:11,680 --> 00:06:13,200
Speaker 1: me that was like, am I going to get recognized?

112
00:06:13,279 --> 00:06:15,880
Speaker 1: But it um I did. Look, you know what I

113
00:06:15,960 --> 00:06:19,840
Speaker 1: wanted to. I wanted people to go that that's like

114
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:21,960
Speaker 1: because I was so depressed. My face was. I was

115
00:06:22,080 --> 00:06:25,440
Speaker 1: riding a scooter at top speed, like like looking at

116
00:06:25,480 --> 00:06:28,120
Speaker 1: the sidewalk like despondently like and then I had to

117
00:06:28,160 --> 00:06:29,880
Speaker 1: snap out of it because I kept seeing cars and

118
00:06:29,920 --> 00:06:32,120
Speaker 1: I was like, they're probably pointing and laughing at this

119
00:06:32,320 --> 00:06:34,960
Speaker 1: depressed person on a scooter. But I didn't think of

120
00:06:35,400 --> 00:06:39,159
Speaker 1: getting recognized on that. I don't. I never get recognized

121
00:06:39,279 --> 00:06:43,080
Speaker 1: literally ever, not literally ever, but like it just doesn't happen.

122
00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:46,240
Speaker 1: It doesn't happen, so weird. I like that, though I

123
00:06:46,279 --> 00:06:49,080
Speaker 1: don't want to be it's a we were talking about it.

124
00:06:49,279 --> 00:06:51,960
Speaker 1: There's a perfect level of fame where you everywhere you go,

125
00:06:52,080 --> 00:06:55,240
Speaker 1: you don't think someone's going to know who you are. Yeah,

126
00:06:55,400 --> 00:06:59,000
Speaker 1: I mean it feels when you do get recognized, it

127
00:06:59,080 --> 00:07:02,880
Speaker 1: feels pretty good. But it's not like I can't imagine

128
00:07:02,960 --> 00:07:07,880
Speaker 1: chasing that feeling of like but still no. I mean,

129
00:07:08,000 --> 00:07:11,080
Speaker 1: as in high school, the idea of like someday people

130
00:07:11,120 --> 00:07:15,440
Speaker 1: being like is that was number one goal. I don't

131
00:07:15,440 --> 00:07:20,440
Speaker 1: know why so much. I used to do it at

132
00:07:20,480 --> 00:07:22,880
Speaker 1: my gate. We used we came up. We heard about

133
00:07:22,920 --> 00:07:29,720
Speaker 1: this thing. Kirsten's sisters to Kristen's sister's boyfriend, Brian, Brian Glass.

134
00:07:30,840 --> 00:07:33,080
Speaker 1: He was so cool, but he told us about a

135
00:07:33,360 --> 00:07:36,120
Speaker 1: thing they did where they were on springbreak or something

136
00:07:36,240 --> 00:07:39,360
Speaker 1: and he and his friends, one of them wore sunglasses

137
00:07:39,400 --> 00:07:41,240
Speaker 1: and like was mysterious at a place and then the

138
00:07:41,320 --> 00:07:42,560
Speaker 1: rest of the friends went up was like can I

139
00:07:42,600 --> 00:07:44,800
Speaker 1: get a picture with you? Can I get your autograph?

140
00:07:45,280 --> 00:07:48,040
Speaker 1: And then everyone just started doing it because they thought

141
00:07:48,080 --> 00:07:50,000
Speaker 1: this person was famous. Like it didn't matter who it was.

142
00:07:50,120 --> 00:07:51,400
Speaker 1: They were just like who is that And they're like

143
00:07:51,480 --> 00:07:53,480
Speaker 1: it's Brian Glass and they're like, I mean it was

144
00:07:53,520 --> 00:07:57,960
Speaker 1: before Google nine, and I just remember being like, that

145
00:07:58,120 --> 00:08:00,960
Speaker 1: is the coolest idea. I want to do it so bad,

146
00:08:01,640 --> 00:08:03,640
Speaker 1: and so I never asked anyone to do it for me,

147
00:08:03,720 --> 00:08:06,040
Speaker 1: but I used to. I remember go to the airport

148
00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:09,080
Speaker 1: with my family and I used to just try to

149
00:08:09,120 --> 00:08:11,760
Speaker 1: look famous and like sit off by myself so that

150
00:08:11,880 --> 00:08:15,280
Speaker 1: maybe someone thought I was famous. So lame, but that

151
00:08:15,440 --> 00:08:20,520
Speaker 1: is a fun little part to do. People do it

152
00:08:20,840 --> 00:08:24,760
Speaker 1: too before they're famous, like in the rap Game or whatever,

153
00:08:24,840 --> 00:08:27,600
Speaker 1: where you act as if they rent like, you know,

154
00:08:28,040 --> 00:08:31,480
Speaker 1: Lamborghini for one day and they drive down Miami Collins

155
00:08:31,560 --> 00:08:34,120
Speaker 1: Avenue and they have all their friends like and like

156
00:08:34,320 --> 00:08:36,959
Speaker 1: they get like five girls and and it's like, well,

157
00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:42,080
Speaker 1: before they're someone, they do they act as if Yeah,

158
00:08:42,160 --> 00:08:45,480
Speaker 1: acting as if does work. Um, it'd be weird. I

159
00:08:45,520 --> 00:08:47,920
Speaker 1: mean what would we do to act as if we're

160
00:08:48,480 --> 00:08:53,240
Speaker 1: just huge glasses? And I mean just it's just so

161
00:08:53,400 --> 00:08:55,640
Speaker 1: funny to think about any other things. I get recognized

162
00:08:55,960 --> 00:09:01,640
Speaker 1: dogs sometimes because of because first you wear you you peacock.

163
00:09:01,760 --> 00:09:03,400
Speaker 1: That's what you do as a celebrity. You don't actually

164
00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:05,600
Speaker 1: try to blend in. You wear something ridiculous so people

165
00:09:05,640 --> 00:09:08,319
Speaker 1: look at you and then go, wait, that's Bill Murray. Yeah,

166
00:09:08,400 --> 00:09:10,839
Speaker 1: you blend in during the day, that's your thing. Like

167
00:09:11,040 --> 00:09:15,280
Speaker 1: you are very incognito when you run, and I ridiculous,

168
00:09:15,320 --> 00:09:17,800
Speaker 1: Like I wear like bright hats and like I dress

169
00:09:18,040 --> 00:09:20,080
Speaker 1: like I don't want to get recognized, but I end

170
00:09:20,200 --> 00:09:22,360
Speaker 1: up wearing things to go for walks with the dog,

171
00:09:22,480 --> 00:09:28,199
Speaker 1: like purple you know, uh crocs with a green shirt

172
00:09:28,360 --> 00:09:31,760
Speaker 1: and a pink hat and a big pink like bilarrow

173
00:09:32,040 --> 00:09:34,720
Speaker 1: sack to put my not a blair but like, um,

174
00:09:35,520 --> 00:09:37,640
Speaker 1: what are those things called to put maryan? And so

175
00:09:37,720 --> 00:09:39,559
Speaker 1: I have a dog hanging on a pink sack over

176
00:09:39,640 --> 00:09:42,640
Speaker 1: my shoulder. I wear like colorful things that people kind

177
00:09:42,640 --> 00:09:45,199
Speaker 1: of go, I guess they go. And my hair looks scraggly.

178
00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:46,920
Speaker 1: I look like an old crazy woman. I look like

179
00:09:47,000 --> 00:09:49,559
Speaker 1: the woman that used to be in comics and that

180
00:09:49,960 --> 00:09:52,400
Speaker 1: was sometimes in birthday cards. It's like I'm a Hayndred

181
00:09:52,840 --> 00:09:57,160
Speaker 1: and this is what I think. I don't know who

182
00:09:57,240 --> 00:09:58,640
Speaker 1: that is, but that's who I feel like. I look

183
00:09:58,720 --> 00:10:01,360
Speaker 1: like like I have a grandma's aisle because I just

184
00:10:01,480 --> 00:10:05,400
Speaker 1: don't putting together outfits is exhausting. And I just saw

185
00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:09,640
Speaker 1: this clip from this show called I think it's called

186
00:10:09,720 --> 00:10:14,600
Speaker 1: Like Friend Zone with um Paul Shear and oh god,

187
00:10:14,880 --> 00:10:18,280
Speaker 1: now I'm blanking on Jason's man man Zukas and Rob

188
00:10:18,400 --> 00:10:21,400
Speaker 1: Hubill and I think some other people. But Jason Manzucas

189
00:10:21,679 --> 00:10:24,640
Speaker 1: was talking about He's like, I don't wear that's kind

190
00:10:24,640 --> 00:10:27,440
Speaker 1: of a good Jason man Zucas. I don't wear anything

191
00:10:27,679 --> 00:10:31,920
Speaker 1: except a white, uh you know, button up shirt, white

192
00:10:31,960 --> 00:10:35,640
Speaker 1: Oxford shirt, and like the same pants every single day.

193
00:10:35,679 --> 00:10:36,959
Speaker 1: It's the same thing. Maybe I'll throw a vest on

194
00:10:37,000 --> 00:10:38,839
Speaker 1: it or a jacket if I have a premiere. But

195
00:10:39,000 --> 00:10:40,760
Speaker 1: and then they started rifling through pictures of him, and

196
00:10:40,840 --> 00:10:42,560
Speaker 1: it's like the same thing every time. And he said

197
00:10:42,640 --> 00:10:47,439
Speaker 1: that there was some quote by God. Who was it? Oh, no,

198
00:10:47,520 --> 00:10:49,120
Speaker 1: I think it was a monks he went. Oh. He

199
00:10:49,200 --> 00:10:50,719
Speaker 1: was like, oh, this is gonna sound pretentious, but I

200
00:10:50,880 --> 00:10:53,959
Speaker 1: just I was doing some retreat with a bunch of

201
00:10:54,160 --> 00:10:56,959
Speaker 1: monks and wherever India or something. And he was like

202
00:10:57,400 --> 00:11:01,280
Speaker 1: they they said that, like, you know, to be closer

203
00:11:01,320 --> 00:11:04,520
Speaker 1: to God, eliminate choices from your life, and you know,

204
00:11:04,600 --> 00:11:08,959
Speaker 1: whatever God is or whatever, like yourself, like the choices

205
00:11:09,040 --> 00:11:12,679
Speaker 1: do just like muddy the water that could be clear

206
00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:16,160
Speaker 1: of our like understanding of ourselves and like just every

207
00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:18,480
Speaker 1: day is a million choices, like think about it. Like

208
00:11:19,360 --> 00:11:21,440
Speaker 1: for me, Starbucks is not a choice. It is plugged

209
00:11:21,440 --> 00:11:23,559
Speaker 1: into my phone. It's what I want every day, no

210
00:11:23,679 --> 00:11:26,880
Speaker 1: matter what what My food is literally not a choice anymore,

211
00:11:26,920 --> 00:11:31,320
Speaker 1: it's just what I want every day. Wearing things, that's

212
00:11:31,320 --> 00:11:34,559
Speaker 1: a choice. I'm overwhelmed with clothes, and I do like

213
00:11:34,679 --> 00:11:36,520
Speaker 1: picking up clothes from my show because it can be

214
00:11:36,679 --> 00:11:39,480
Speaker 1: random and fun and I can wear short, like sexy,

215
00:11:39,720 --> 00:11:42,600
Speaker 1: like slutty things. I can wear like ridiculous stuff that's

216
00:11:42,640 --> 00:11:46,840
Speaker 1: fun and truly. Like before I go to a show,

217
00:11:46,880 --> 00:11:49,960
Speaker 1: I just I bring too humongous suitcases for three days

218
00:11:50,080 --> 00:11:52,560
Speaker 1: of shows with different and I don't give it any

219
00:11:52,640 --> 00:11:54,160
Speaker 1: thought of like what I'm gonna pair with what. I

220
00:11:54,240 --> 00:11:56,839
Speaker 1: just throw pieces and then it's fun for me to

221
00:11:56,920 --> 00:11:59,679
Speaker 1: go okay, and then I even refine it from there.

222
00:11:59,720 --> 00:12:01,080
Speaker 1: So when I go to the show, I picked one

223
00:12:01,120 --> 00:12:02,920
Speaker 1: suitcase and I throw in a bunch of stuff from

224
00:12:02,960 --> 00:12:04,920
Speaker 1: my two suitcases, and then when I get to the show,

225
00:12:05,120 --> 00:12:06,760
Speaker 1: is like a game where I'm like, you gotta put

226
00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:10,120
Speaker 1: together two outfits out of this crap, and it's like

227
00:12:10,200 --> 00:12:14,000
Speaker 1: a fun game show, I think, and uh, I enjoyed that,

228
00:12:14,160 --> 00:12:19,520
Speaker 1: but on a day to day when you when we

229
00:12:19,679 --> 00:12:22,480
Speaker 1: have social media, and is still important because it's our

230
00:12:22,559 --> 00:12:25,400
Speaker 1: job and part of our job. When you wear an outfit,

231
00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:28,440
Speaker 1: the next week, you're wearing the same outfit. It's gonna

232
00:12:28,480 --> 00:12:30,520
Speaker 1: look exactly like the same before, even if it's a

233
00:12:30,600 --> 00:12:34,800
Speaker 1: different stage. So you're not bringing new content. There's that

234
00:12:35,080 --> 00:12:37,319
Speaker 1: idea of like, oh I need to look different in

235
00:12:37,440 --> 00:12:41,520
Speaker 1: this new uh, this new photo on Instagram because if not,

236
00:12:41,600 --> 00:12:44,079
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna look the same. You know, part of

237
00:12:44,160 --> 00:12:46,040
Speaker 1: me just wants to wear the same black shirt and

238
00:12:46,200 --> 00:12:48,719
Speaker 1: jeans everything I did this whole weekend. I think I

239
00:12:48,760 --> 00:12:51,400
Speaker 1: wear the same thing all weekend. There's something about guys

240
00:12:51,679 --> 00:12:54,439
Speaker 1: wearing the same thing over and over that almost is

241
00:12:54,559 --> 00:12:58,280
Speaker 1: as much of attention getter as women wearing different things.

242
00:12:58,679 --> 00:13:01,480
Speaker 1: Agree No, Like remember when Mark Norman used to have

243
00:13:01,640 --> 00:13:03,959
Speaker 1: a he wore the same thing every time. I missed

244
00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:07,160
Speaker 1: that Mark Norman, There's something very there's something quirky about it.

245
00:13:07,200 --> 00:13:09,120
Speaker 1: There was something that that was his thing, that he

246
00:13:09,200 --> 00:13:11,400
Speaker 1: were the same thing. Now I think Jason Manzucas, you

247
00:13:11,400 --> 00:13:13,640
Speaker 1: wouldn't you wouldn't know that he wears the same thing.

248
00:13:13,720 --> 00:13:15,320
Speaker 1: He's doing it not to stand out, but I think

249
00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:17,400
Speaker 1: there's something that makes it you stand out if you

250
00:13:17,480 --> 00:13:19,480
Speaker 1: wear the same thing and you never have to think

251
00:13:19,480 --> 00:13:23,000
Speaker 1: about it. Well, George Carlin, did I mean Carlin just

252
00:13:23,040 --> 00:13:26,080
Speaker 1: wore a black T shirt? Black T shirt? What about

253
00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:29,199
Speaker 1: the ponytail? Though George Carlin always had a ponytail? Is

254
00:13:29,280 --> 00:13:31,040
Speaker 1: that I don't even think of it. I don't even

255
00:13:31,080 --> 00:13:33,320
Speaker 1: think about his pony That's how manly. And I did

256
00:13:33,400 --> 00:13:35,360
Speaker 1: an interview with The New York Times about that. I

257
00:13:35,520 --> 00:13:38,000
Speaker 1: was like, I remember picking up my dad's books of

258
00:13:38,040 --> 00:13:40,160
Speaker 1: George Carlin and just being like, who is this old

259
00:13:40,280 --> 00:13:42,400
Speaker 1: man with a ponytail? Like to me as a kid,

260
00:13:42,520 --> 00:13:44,839
Speaker 1: he was the old man with a ponytail. And then

261
00:13:44,880 --> 00:13:46,880
Speaker 1: growing up you go, oh, I don't even see it,

262
00:13:47,400 --> 00:13:49,120
Speaker 1: but it is it was a thing to be like,

263
00:13:49,440 --> 00:13:52,640
Speaker 1: to maintain some coolness. Well, I think the other thing

264
00:13:54,120 --> 00:13:56,840
Speaker 1: when we go George Carlin wear the same thing every

265
00:13:56,880 --> 00:14:00,240
Speaker 1: time we saw him on his special wearing that now? Yes,

266
00:14:00,520 --> 00:14:03,240
Speaker 1: now every time he performed in Tacoma, Washington, was he

267
00:14:03,320 --> 00:14:04,920
Speaker 1: wearing not wear the same thing every time? If you

268
00:14:04,960 --> 00:14:07,319
Speaker 1: watch the documentary, he was he had cool clothes like

269
00:14:07,520 --> 00:14:09,760
Speaker 1: up and but like his last few he'd like he

270
00:14:09,920 --> 00:14:12,240
Speaker 1: found the thing I felt like, And then Louis wore

271
00:14:12,240 --> 00:14:15,679
Speaker 1: a black T shirt and jeans, and like there's been

272
00:14:15,679 --> 00:14:17,599
Speaker 1: a couple of other community Steve jobs always were the

273
00:14:17,640 --> 00:14:19,720
Speaker 1: same thing. Yeah, he's a great comic. I feel like

274
00:14:19,880 --> 00:14:23,680
Speaker 1: he's pretty funny, but he's funnier now. Um, but I

275
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:26,840
Speaker 1: do think, like in my head sometimes if I'm wearing

276
00:14:26,880 --> 00:14:29,720
Speaker 1: the same thing every day and I see you know this,

277
00:14:30,240 --> 00:14:32,040
Speaker 1: I go to the same bagel shop or whatever, They're

278
00:14:32,040 --> 00:14:34,120
Speaker 1: gonna be like, God, he's a dirty motherfucker wearing the

279
00:14:34,160 --> 00:14:37,560
Speaker 1: same thing. I know, I know, I know, I know.

280
00:14:37,720 --> 00:14:39,160
Speaker 1: But then you have to buy a lot of the

281
00:14:39,240 --> 00:14:41,360
Speaker 1: same thing or wash it a lot, and people don't

282
00:14:41,640 --> 00:14:43,320
Speaker 1: know you just buy a lot of the same thing. Yeah,

283
00:14:44,120 --> 00:14:45,720
Speaker 1: that's what I always do with I have a pair

284
00:14:45,800 --> 00:14:47,520
Speaker 1: of jeans from that and I've let you some of

285
00:14:47,560 --> 00:14:51,160
Speaker 1: those jeans, know, because I bought like so many pairs

286
00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:53,480
Speaker 1: of them. Remember those they're from the Gap. I bought

287
00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:56,120
Speaker 1: like nine pairs of these jeans because I was like,

288
00:14:56,200 --> 00:15:00,920
Speaker 1: they are perfect. I still have like three of them. Um, yeah,

289
00:15:01,280 --> 00:15:04,200
Speaker 1: they're there, but I don't fit in them either. I

290
00:15:04,320 --> 00:15:06,400
Speaker 1: bought all different sizes and I don't fit in any

291
00:15:06,480 --> 00:15:08,960
Speaker 1: of them. But um. Yeah, when you find something good,

292
00:15:09,680 --> 00:15:14,800
Speaker 1: get a bunch of it. Because twelve buck mats and

293
00:15:14,840 --> 00:15:17,760
Speaker 1: black T shirt. Yes, yes, this one has a pocket,

294
00:15:17,960 --> 00:15:20,480
Speaker 1: one doesn't have a pocket, one is this way, one

295
00:15:20,640 --> 00:15:23,920
Speaker 1: is curved. But that that kind of stuff does stress

296
00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:27,960
Speaker 1: me out. I'm so overwhelmed with my Like I'm getting

297
00:15:28,040 --> 00:15:30,720
Speaker 1: women to come, you know, organize my place for me

298
00:15:30,800 --> 00:15:34,240
Speaker 1: and get me closets and stuff. But they're coming in July,

299
00:15:34,360 --> 00:15:37,880
Speaker 1: I think, and um, but the idea of getting them,

300
00:15:38,080 --> 00:15:40,840
Speaker 1: getting ready for them to come is a whole other issue.

301
00:15:41,000 --> 00:15:44,440
Speaker 1: Like I don't I have so much stuff. I want

302
00:15:44,440 --> 00:15:46,200
Speaker 1: to do an estate sale where I have just people

303
00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:48,640
Speaker 1: come by and just take stuff. I leave out everything

304
00:15:48,680 --> 00:15:51,120
Speaker 1: I don't want anymore and they just come and take it.

305
00:15:52,040 --> 00:15:53,800
Speaker 1: And that way I know it's not going in a dumpster,

306
00:15:54,160 --> 00:15:55,520
Speaker 1: or you can take it and throw it at a dumpster.

307
00:15:55,640 --> 00:15:58,280
Speaker 1: Just don't tell me about it. Is there any party?

308
00:15:58,280 --> 00:16:00,480
Speaker 1: It does like I'm spending a lot of money. I

309
00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:04,480
Speaker 1: don't need to prep for them to come. That's their job. Well,

310
00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:06,840
Speaker 1: I do feel that way, but I have they don't

311
00:16:06,840 --> 00:16:09,720
Speaker 1: know where to put everything like I want. I thought

312
00:16:09,760 --> 00:16:12,000
Speaker 1: you were giving them the reins. I thought I'm going to.

313
00:16:12,120 --> 00:16:14,320
Speaker 1: But what I'm gonna do is put different things in piles,

314
00:16:14,360 --> 00:16:16,240
Speaker 1: like this all goes in this room. There's a pile

315
00:16:16,320 --> 00:16:19,560
Speaker 1: in this room. But then there's stuff like I don't know,

316
00:16:19,720 --> 00:16:21,800
Speaker 1: like but you're telling them how to organize. They know

317
00:16:21,880 --> 00:16:24,760
Speaker 1: how to organize. I know, but maybe just don't think

318
00:16:24,880 --> 00:16:26,680
Speaker 1: I want in my bedroom some things I wanted the

319
00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:31,120
Speaker 1: guests back, you know, and who knows if I'm gonna

320
00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:32,640
Speaker 1: and then I'm going to have an assistant come and

321
00:16:32,760 --> 00:16:34,440
Speaker 1: unpack me every week so I don't have to think

322
00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,240
Speaker 1: about it. So then I don't know what I'm gonna

323
00:16:37,280 --> 00:16:39,400
Speaker 1: do with all my time. It's interesting because it's like

324
00:16:39,720 --> 00:16:45,280
Speaker 1: you're spending a lot of energy and thought on organizing

325
00:16:45,440 --> 00:16:47,760
Speaker 1: something that you could be It's like when I used

326
00:16:47,760 --> 00:16:49,880
Speaker 1: to cheat in college, and I would spend so much

327
00:16:49,960 --> 00:16:53,000
Speaker 1: time figuring out who I would cheat off, of becoming

328
00:16:53,120 --> 00:16:54,880
Speaker 1: friends with someone to cheat off of an all this

329
00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:58,480
Speaker 1: I could just organize instead of spreading about organizing. I mean,

330
00:16:58,520 --> 00:17:00,360
Speaker 1: I don't know if you couldn't do it, it's supposed

331
00:17:00,360 --> 00:17:02,880
Speaker 1: to put it. It's not that this thing, it's once

332
00:17:02,960 --> 00:17:05,920
Speaker 1: it's done, then I have an assistant and who she'll

333
00:17:06,000 --> 00:17:08,640
Speaker 1: know every place and then I will get into town,

334
00:17:08,760 --> 00:17:11,160
Speaker 1: roll my suitcases in and not she'll do my laundry.

335
00:17:11,320 --> 00:17:13,720
Speaker 1: And I mean, I know this sounds like very elitist

336
00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:16,960
Speaker 1: and like, but it is. I will have someone to

337
00:17:17,080 --> 00:17:20,359
Speaker 1: do everything for me, hopefully, And I mean, once you

338
00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:22,760
Speaker 1: get it going, will be a well oiled machine, hopefully.

339
00:17:22,920 --> 00:17:27,160
Speaker 1: Do you use uh, fabric softener like shoppening sheets? Yes?

340
00:17:27,760 --> 00:17:29,560
Speaker 1: Do you know those? You leave a residue in your

341
00:17:29,640 --> 00:17:32,600
Speaker 1: clothes and that's why they all look dingy. So you're

342
00:17:32,600 --> 00:17:34,159
Speaker 1: not supposed to use those. You're supposed to put in

343
00:17:34,200 --> 00:17:39,679
Speaker 1: white vinegar, white vinegar. Yea, yeah, don't use red wine vinegar.

344
00:17:39,720 --> 00:17:43,560
Speaker 1: I can see this going another way. Hey, look, we

345
00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:48,440
Speaker 1: gotta go to break what if it's red clothe Some

346
00:17:48,680 --> 00:17:50,680
Speaker 1: say that I'm in the blood or in the crypt.

347
00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:58,000
Speaker 1: Sounds like a rap. Uh, it sounds like a rap. Okay,

348
00:17:58,040 --> 00:18:00,760
Speaker 1: we're back, clean clothed without harshchemic goals. To clean your

349
00:18:00,760 --> 00:18:03,440
Speaker 1: clothes with vinegar, put a half cup of distilled white

350
00:18:03,520 --> 00:18:06,800
Speaker 1: vinegar and your washing machines machines detergent compartment. You don't

351
00:18:06,840 --> 00:18:13,760
Speaker 1: need to add other detergents. What what you oh? Yeah?

352
00:18:14,240 --> 00:18:16,240
Speaker 1: So so build up can result in blue or white

353
00:18:16,280 --> 00:18:18,199
Speaker 1: streaks appearing on your clothing. It can also turn your

354
00:18:18,240 --> 00:18:21,679
Speaker 1: white clothing yellow and cause dark clothing to fade. Vinegar

355
00:18:21,760 --> 00:18:24,040
Speaker 1: can loosen so build up and prevent it from clinging

356
00:18:24,080 --> 00:18:27,280
Speaker 1: to your clothes. Oh man, I'm doing this. This might

357
00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:29,359
Speaker 1: be the my thing. Like I always think all my

358
00:18:29,440 --> 00:18:34,399
Speaker 1: clothes have there's something dirty about me because everyone cloth vinegar.

359
00:18:35,600 --> 00:18:37,600
Speaker 1: But I feel like it will wash it out. I

360
00:18:37,640 --> 00:18:39,399
Speaker 1: feel like that would be an issue they would address

361
00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:42,400
Speaker 1: on here if that was a thing. As mentioned before,

362
00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:44,440
Speaker 1: vinegar won't leave any smell on your clothes. But you

363
00:18:44,480 --> 00:18:46,119
Speaker 1: can add a few drops of essential oils if you

364
00:18:46,160 --> 00:18:50,639
Speaker 1: want your clothing to be fragrant. Okay, you can replace

365
00:18:50,680 --> 00:18:53,119
Speaker 1: fabric softener with vinegar. It can soften fabrics, so you

366
00:18:53,200 --> 00:18:57,400
Speaker 1: do everything with vinegar. Yeah, I just want my Um,

367
00:18:57,880 --> 00:19:01,919
Speaker 1: I just want my clothing. Did not be like have that? Like, Oh,

368
00:19:02,160 --> 00:19:04,840
Speaker 1: I put on a pair of shorts yesterday, like sweatpant shorts,

369
00:19:05,680 --> 00:19:09,960
Speaker 1: and they are like they're faded. You know that that

370
00:19:10,080 --> 00:19:13,440
Speaker 1: black faded that happens to sweatpants. Um. And then I

371
00:19:14,160 --> 00:19:15,600
Speaker 1: had to get something out of my pocket and I

372
00:19:15,680 --> 00:19:17,600
Speaker 1: went in the pocket and I pulled out the pocket.

373
00:19:17,640 --> 00:19:20,680
Speaker 1: So it's like you know out and the pocket is

374
00:19:20,760 --> 00:19:25,040
Speaker 1: this perfect black color, same fabric as the outside that

375
00:19:25,119 --> 00:19:28,000
Speaker 1: has been protected from whatever the funk is going on

376
00:19:28,119 --> 00:19:30,360
Speaker 1: on the outside, and you just you see the potential

377
00:19:30,440 --> 00:19:32,840
Speaker 1: of your clothes, And I was like, why can't that

378
00:19:33,160 --> 00:19:36,200
Speaker 1: just stay that? I know, I'm trying to think. I don't.

379
00:19:36,280 --> 00:19:39,359
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm not one, but handwashing helps at times,

380
00:19:39,440 --> 00:19:41,960
Speaker 1: depending on if it's delicate fab But I feel like

381
00:19:42,200 --> 00:19:45,720
Speaker 1: putting in as much whenever you whenever you put in

382
00:19:46,160 --> 00:19:49,040
Speaker 1: you know, not not put in as much. Yeah. Oh,

383
00:19:49,160 --> 00:19:51,800
Speaker 1: I mean I'm one to talk, but I would you know,

384
00:19:51,880 --> 00:19:54,840
Speaker 1: you're pushing it in to like get all the and

385
00:19:54,920 --> 00:19:57,399
Speaker 1: you're putting the colors and maybe the white all in,

386
00:19:57,640 --> 00:20:00,119
Speaker 1: so it's definitely gonna work. Throw it on cold, and

387
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:02,879
Speaker 1: then you leave it in there and it builds up mold.

388
00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:05,320
Speaker 1: That's the other thing. Like that's what I've done before

389
00:20:05,359 --> 00:20:07,080
Speaker 1: with a D d S. Like I'll leave, I'll just

390
00:20:07,720 --> 00:20:09,879
Speaker 1: forget that. I even never put the clothes in, and

391
00:20:09,960 --> 00:20:14,600
Speaker 1: then three days later I've I can't eat the trifector meal. Yes, yes,

392
00:20:15,359 --> 00:20:18,399
Speaker 1: save again. Yeah, yeah, this is your summer look or

393
00:20:18,480 --> 00:20:23,440
Speaker 1: what's what summer look? Yeah? Like smooth, smooth, smooth and mustache,

394
00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:26,240
Speaker 1: keeping the mustache because last time you've shaved, I feel

395
00:20:26,240 --> 00:20:30,080
Speaker 1: like you left some stubble. No, yeah, this is completely smooth.

396
00:20:30,119 --> 00:20:32,240
Speaker 1: It's so really good, Like I haven't done that in

397
00:20:32,359 --> 00:20:35,560
Speaker 1: a long time. And there's something to the process a

398
00:20:35,680 --> 00:20:39,000
Speaker 1: guy shaving their face, which like it does I don't know.

399
00:20:39,119 --> 00:20:41,399
Speaker 1: It makes you feel clean, it makes you feel like, oh,

400
00:20:41,480 --> 00:20:44,800
Speaker 1: I'm here to present myself like I feel. I don't know.

401
00:20:44,920 --> 00:20:47,639
Speaker 1: It's just a nice step. It's meditative to do it.

402
00:20:47,760 --> 00:20:51,159
Speaker 1: How long does it take you? Not that long? But

403
00:20:51,440 --> 00:20:53,400
Speaker 1: I remember, you know when you're a kid, you want

404
00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:55,359
Speaker 1: pubic hair as a boy, and you want to be

405
00:20:55,400 --> 00:20:58,240
Speaker 1: able to shave. You wouldn't be able to shave. You

406
00:20:58,240 --> 00:21:00,399
Speaker 1: want to be able to shave. Got it? Because it

407
00:21:00,520 --> 00:21:04,000
Speaker 1: just in my face now I do it probably once

408
00:21:04,040 --> 00:21:05,920
Speaker 1: a week right now, it's coming in. I felt it

409
00:21:05,920 --> 00:21:07,959
Speaker 1: the other day, like I can feel stubble around my chin.

410
00:21:08,119 --> 00:21:11,960
Speaker 1: But I in the shower will scrub my face with

411
00:21:12,119 --> 00:21:15,200
Speaker 1: like conditioner when I'm bored because I'm just trying to

412
00:21:15,280 --> 00:21:17,040
Speaker 1: take a longer or I'm trying to let the conditioners

413
00:21:17,040 --> 00:21:18,680
Speaker 1: set it on my hair or something, and I'm bored,

414
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:21,440
Speaker 1: and I just with my razor that I use on

415
00:21:21,480 --> 00:21:25,480
Speaker 1: my legs. That Harry's the kind that boys get. I

416
00:21:25,640 --> 00:21:30,199
Speaker 1: do my chin up to my cheek um and sometimes

417
00:21:30,240 --> 00:21:31,959
Speaker 1: I almost get a sideburn where I'm like, well, I'm

418
00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:33,760
Speaker 1: getting little too. Because I don't use a mirror. I'm

419
00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:36,520
Speaker 1: just kind of in there. I do. I got what

420
00:21:36,560 --> 00:21:40,120
Speaker 1: I've got, and I shave everything and it makeup goes

421
00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:42,359
Speaker 1: on so smooth, and it's kind of fun because right

422
00:21:42,400 --> 00:21:44,879
Speaker 1: now it's grown back. I think I shaved it on Saturday,

423
00:21:45,280 --> 00:21:48,159
Speaker 1: so I can feel a little like little like prickles,

424
00:21:48,400 --> 00:21:51,479
Speaker 1: not prickles, but just little It just feels like sandpaper almost,

425
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:53,680
Speaker 1: And then I'm gonna get to shaven and it's gonna

426
00:21:53,680 --> 00:21:57,000
Speaker 1: be fresh. Like that's the fun part about shaving your

427
00:21:57,080 --> 00:22:00,720
Speaker 1: legs or anything. It's like you get a fresh feeling

428
00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:03,600
Speaker 1: whenever you want it to do to shave it. And

429
00:22:03,680 --> 00:22:05,960
Speaker 1: there's something about leaving where you have a nice balance

430
00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:11,480
Speaker 1: of fresh and then a little rugged. Now is there

431
00:22:12,119 --> 00:22:14,119
Speaker 1: fear that it will come back thicker? Because that's a

432
00:22:14,320 --> 00:22:16,480
Speaker 1: that's a why is that a wives tale? That's an

433
00:22:16,480 --> 00:22:21,280
Speaker 1: old girlfriend's tale. I shaved my nips, I shaved my legs.

434
00:22:21,320 --> 00:22:23,440
Speaker 1: I shave like my leg hair doesn't come back thicker

435
00:22:23,760 --> 00:22:27,400
Speaker 1: my The hair on the mole on my ass does

436
00:22:27,520 --> 00:22:31,639
Speaker 1: come back with a vengeance. But that's always had like

437
00:22:31,720 --> 00:22:34,320
Speaker 1: a long hair. Why do moles sprout like hairs that

438
00:22:34,440 --> 00:22:39,880
Speaker 1: are like so annoying? Pocahon, Yeah, there's something in there

439
00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:42,800
Speaker 1: that it's just it's black. I'm like, no hair on

440
00:22:42,880 --> 00:22:48,120
Speaker 1: my body is this color? Um? I do like shavings

441
00:22:49,080 --> 00:22:51,800
Speaker 1: that's never developed, or your chin hairs, you know you

442
00:22:51,960 --> 00:22:54,320
Speaker 1: get those long ones. I mean it's a thing, but yeah,

443
00:22:54,359 --> 00:22:56,440
Speaker 1: shaving your face. I just never did that as a woman.

444
00:22:56,600 --> 00:22:59,240
Speaker 1: Now it's like they call it German planing. I do that.

445
00:22:59,320 --> 00:23:01,720
Speaker 1: I going to off? I know, isn't that? Do you

446
00:23:01,800 --> 00:23:05,159
Speaker 1: go somewhere to do it? Right? Yeah? What they? How

447
00:23:05,200 --> 00:23:07,840
Speaker 1: do they do it differently? So? I mean I have

448
00:23:07,960 --> 00:23:10,440
Speaker 1: my eyes closed, but it's basically like the same wand

449
00:23:10,480 --> 00:23:12,760
Speaker 1: that you might use to like shape your eyebrows. They

450
00:23:12,880 --> 00:23:17,040
Speaker 1: just yes, it kind of scrapes off the dead skin too. Yeah,

451
00:23:17,080 --> 00:23:20,720
Speaker 1: it's great, And that's how I feel about your full Yeah. Yeah,

452
00:23:20,920 --> 00:23:23,639
Speaker 1: there's something that you tell yourself that it's like Dermo

453
00:23:23,760 --> 00:23:26,480
Speaker 1: plane verse. I'm just grabbing a guy's razor, like it

454
00:23:26,560 --> 00:23:28,560
Speaker 1: feels more feminine. Yeah, I mean I think that's why

455
00:23:28,600 --> 00:23:32,399
Speaker 1: they use that instead, or they use microblading instead of

456
00:23:32,560 --> 00:23:37,400
Speaker 1: tattoo eyebrows. Yeah, you know, like there's always like feminine ways,

457
00:23:37,440 --> 00:23:39,320
Speaker 1: but I think it is. It is a way to

458
00:23:39,400 --> 00:23:41,960
Speaker 1: scrape off the dead skin cells along with the hair

459
00:23:42,119 --> 00:23:44,159
Speaker 1: on your face, because, yeah, you don't realize you have

460
00:23:44,200 --> 00:23:46,040
Speaker 1: a bunch of fuzz on your face and you're making

461
00:23:46,040 --> 00:23:47,840
Speaker 1: and when you're wearing makeup and powder, it just sits

462
00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:50,320
Speaker 1: on top of that and it adds a layer to

463
00:23:50,440 --> 00:23:52,920
Speaker 1: your face that would be probably ten pounds. If you

464
00:23:52,960 --> 00:23:55,120
Speaker 1: put on ten pounds, you know, like your face would

465
00:23:55,119 --> 00:23:58,920
Speaker 1: expand that miniscule of hair amount. Not that it's bad

466
00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:00,720
Speaker 1: to look like you gave ten bounds, but I'm just

467
00:24:00,720 --> 00:24:02,960
Speaker 1: saying it just adds bulk to your face that you

468
00:24:03,000 --> 00:24:06,440
Speaker 1: don't need. Brandon Dermott playing my eyebrows, which was nice

469
00:24:06,880 --> 00:24:10,600
Speaker 1: and shave yeah around. Yeah, worried that she's going to

470
00:24:10,920 --> 00:24:15,240
Speaker 1: go too far, but yeah, you just take off the extras,

471
00:24:15,359 --> 00:24:20,440
Speaker 1: nothing of the Yeah does she pluck it all? Just

472
00:24:20,560 --> 00:24:23,399
Speaker 1: a mental Yeah, Yeah, it's good to do. Who does

473
00:24:23,480 --> 00:24:26,200
Speaker 1: your eyebrows? No one, I don't do my eyebrows anymore.

474
00:24:26,240 --> 00:24:30,120
Speaker 1: I used to do them religiously. Um, I just got

475
00:24:30,200 --> 00:24:32,480
Speaker 1: eyebrow tint stuff, but I got the wrong color, so

476
00:24:32,600 --> 00:24:34,840
Speaker 1: I tried to do that. Yeah, used to tint them up, Yeah,

477
00:24:34,840 --> 00:24:37,040
Speaker 1: I used to. Always tinting is great because it looks

478
00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:39,200
Speaker 1: bad the first day you look like Charlie Chaplin, but

479
00:24:39,440 --> 00:24:41,440
Speaker 1: the rest of it is great. But my my eyebrows

480
00:24:41,480 --> 00:24:44,439
Speaker 1: are so blond and they like have but I think

481
00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:46,960
Speaker 1: they match your hair. Yeah, but I don't want them to.

482
00:24:47,040 --> 00:24:50,200
Speaker 1: I want them to be darker. It's for whatever reasons,

483
00:24:50,240 --> 00:24:52,000
Speaker 1: you know, is eyebrows are darker than her hair. See,

484
00:24:52,800 --> 00:24:58,040
Speaker 1: it just looks better eyebrows to me. Since what's the cara? Yeah,

485
00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:01,040
Speaker 1: like no one really talked about eyebrows on women. That's

486
00:25:01,119 --> 00:25:04,720
Speaker 1: like thick eyebrows came back, Yes they did. Was it

487
00:25:04,800 --> 00:25:06,720
Speaker 1: ever a thing before? Like why did they get so

488
00:25:06,920 --> 00:25:10,920
Speaker 1: thin for a while? I know it's the's we just

489
00:25:11,040 --> 00:25:14,480
Speaker 1: went crazy because I think we were just like thin.

490
00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:18,520
Speaker 1: We have to be thin everywhere everywhere, Like bushy eyebrows

491
00:25:18,600 --> 00:25:21,600
Speaker 1: was the more masculine, I guess, and we're like little

492
00:25:21,640 --> 00:25:24,440
Speaker 1: petite eyebrows. I don't know why that was such a

493
00:25:24,480 --> 00:25:27,000
Speaker 1: good look and that we actually all thought it looked good,

494
00:25:27,119 --> 00:25:29,040
Speaker 1: like we It wasn't like it didn't look good and

495
00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:31,719
Speaker 1: we just didn't know it did look good to us.

496
00:25:32,480 --> 00:25:36,520
Speaker 1: That's the weird thing about fashion trends or like attraction,

497
00:25:36,720 --> 00:25:39,720
Speaker 1: Like the things you think are hot. It's not like

498
00:25:39,840 --> 00:25:41,800
Speaker 1: you were blind to it in the nineties, or that

499
00:25:42,000 --> 00:25:43,800
Speaker 1: that that outfit that you're looking at a picture of

500
00:25:43,880 --> 00:25:46,400
Speaker 1: that throwback, You're like, what the fund is it wearing?

501
00:25:46,840 --> 00:25:49,159
Speaker 1: No one thought that was weird. We all agreed it

502
00:25:49,240 --> 00:25:51,720
Speaker 1: was cool. It is interesting that it takes all it

503
00:25:51,840 --> 00:25:56,360
Speaker 1: takes is one insanely attractive person to lean into doing

504
00:25:56,480 --> 00:25:58,920
Speaker 1: something different, for people to go that would be attractive

505
00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:01,040
Speaker 1: on me, like this much stash, Like a lot of

506
00:26:01,080 --> 00:26:04,200
Speaker 1: people out of mustache, the Beetles all grew mustache. So

507
00:26:04,320 --> 00:26:07,239
Speaker 1: my dad, out of must like mustaches, ran wild long hair.

508
00:26:07,480 --> 00:26:09,399
Speaker 1: Was the Beatles. They came yeah, and you're like, oh,

509
00:26:09,480 --> 00:26:13,160
Speaker 1: I look like him. Yeah. Meanwhile, it's like, not you're

510
00:26:13,480 --> 00:26:16,520
Speaker 1: you're him. But have you ever started something that you

511
00:26:16,600 --> 00:26:19,760
Speaker 1: didn't take from someone else, because that's a hard thing

512
00:26:19,840 --> 00:26:21,119
Speaker 1: to do. I have not. I don't think I've ever

513
00:26:21,200 --> 00:26:22,680
Speaker 1: had the confidence to be like, I'm gonna do this

514
00:26:22,880 --> 00:26:27,800
Speaker 1: weird thing that no one else is doing. No, I don't.

515
00:26:27,880 --> 00:26:30,119
Speaker 1: I can't think of one time I've been completely a

516
00:26:30,200 --> 00:26:32,479
Speaker 1: regular Swift shirts as a thirty seven year old. I'm

517
00:26:32,520 --> 00:26:36,520
Speaker 1: thirty eight now. But like wearing consistent pink Little Girl

518
00:26:36,640 --> 00:26:39,239
Speaker 1: Taylor Swift shirts is as a thing that I did

519
00:26:39,320 --> 00:26:41,480
Speaker 1: not get from anyone that I was like, this is

520
00:26:41,560 --> 00:26:45,200
Speaker 1: not cool, but it's just what I want, or trying

521
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:50,000
Speaker 1: to think of anything else. Um nose piercing. When I

522
00:26:50,040 --> 00:26:51,639
Speaker 1: got it, no one else was. It wasn't like I

523
00:26:51,960 --> 00:26:53,720
Speaker 1: got that idea from someone. I was just really like,

524
00:26:53,880 --> 00:26:55,560
Speaker 1: I just think that's the place to get it where

525
00:26:55,560 --> 00:26:59,359
Speaker 1: it won't scar um. I got this pierce for a

526
00:26:59,400 --> 00:27:01,800
Speaker 1: little while the top of ear. But did someone else

527
00:27:01,880 --> 00:27:04,800
Speaker 1: have that? No, not that I saw. Just we all

528
00:27:04,880 --> 00:27:07,040
Speaker 1: went somewhere there in the summer, and I was like,

529
00:27:07,200 --> 00:27:09,359
Speaker 1: anyone else in your group getting up there? No. They

530
00:27:09,400 --> 00:27:12,720
Speaker 1: were like that's so dumb. No, I think someone else

531
00:27:12,760 --> 00:27:15,080
Speaker 1: got there. Someone else got an eyebrow. Yeah, didn't you

532
00:27:15,119 --> 00:27:18,000
Speaker 1: get an eyebrow? Chris got an eyebrow on what Yes,

533
00:27:18,119 --> 00:27:22,320
Speaker 1: as a joke, an eyebrow, and that is the most

534
00:27:22,480 --> 00:27:25,800
Speaker 1: scarring place. He was just like do it. I don't know.

535
00:27:25,920 --> 00:27:27,320
Speaker 1: He was just going to show up in his like

536
00:27:27,440 --> 00:27:30,440
Speaker 1: his mom, I don't know, and he went full piercing. Yes,

537
00:27:30,920 --> 00:27:33,240
Speaker 1: I did not expect Chris to do that. I like that,

538
00:27:33,480 --> 00:27:35,879
Speaker 1: that's insane. I know. I didn't expect it either. I

539
00:27:36,000 --> 00:27:38,800
Speaker 1: was like, who's where's that guy? Where's that guy taking risk?

540
00:27:38,840 --> 00:27:40,960
Speaker 1: Where's he when's an eyebrow piercing going to show up?

541
00:27:41,160 --> 00:27:43,359
Speaker 1: My dad did not love that earring. He was like,

542
00:27:44,320 --> 00:27:46,040
Speaker 1: I remember I started. I don't know. I was feeling

543
00:27:46,119 --> 00:27:48,840
Speaker 1: sick coming back. I was as a counselor at camp

544
00:27:49,160 --> 00:27:50,800
Speaker 1: and he's like, yeah, your ears infected. I was like,

545
00:27:51,040 --> 00:27:53,240
Speaker 1: are you sure. I think you might just be saying

546
00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:55,800
Speaker 1: that for me to take the earring now, and then

547
00:27:55,880 --> 00:27:59,560
Speaker 1: it was it probably was. He's probably right, My god,

548
00:27:59,680 --> 00:28:01,520
Speaker 1: those are infections. I mean I did. I got my

549
00:28:01,600 --> 00:28:05,560
Speaker 1: ears pierced twenty something and or no in my thirties

550
00:28:05,800 --> 00:28:09,399
Speaker 1: and it got infected so bad even though I washed it,

551
00:28:09,480 --> 00:28:11,879
Speaker 1: and like, it's that's the only reason I won't get

552
00:28:11,880 --> 00:28:13,359
Speaker 1: piercings now. It's like I don't want to deal with

553
00:28:13,400 --> 00:28:15,560
Speaker 1: the infection and like cleaning it and how much it

554
00:28:15,680 --> 00:28:18,600
Speaker 1: hurts when it gets infected and inflamed, and like, oh

555
00:28:19,080 --> 00:28:25,200
Speaker 1: it sucks. It is interesting like taking chances, uh fashion wise, piercinges,

556
00:28:25,640 --> 00:28:28,119
Speaker 1: dyeing your hair, Like when you get to a certain

557
00:28:28,160 --> 00:28:30,000
Speaker 1: age where you're like, no, this is just the age

558
00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:32,560
Speaker 1: where you're just this person, and then you get a

559
00:28:32,600 --> 00:28:35,760
Speaker 1: little bit older around like sixty, and then you start

560
00:28:35,840 --> 00:28:38,840
Speaker 1: dyeing your hair pink and get like people take yes

561
00:28:39,080 --> 00:28:41,680
Speaker 1: because they're out, maybe they're living on because they're doing

562
00:28:41,720 --> 00:28:45,520
Speaker 1: what they want. At that point, what is Luigi barking at?

563
00:28:46,760 --> 00:28:48,960
Speaker 1: No one's there? It would be amazing if there was

564
00:28:49,000 --> 00:28:51,360
Speaker 1: a guy there with with a machete. Can we just

565
00:28:51,400 --> 00:28:56,880
Speaker 1: get murdered on camera? Can what could be there? There's

566
00:28:56,920 --> 00:29:00,520
Speaker 1: someone probably getting going in. Hey, I want to hear

567
00:29:02,200 --> 00:29:10,720
Speaker 1: ye come on come back, you know, come on, nice

568
00:29:10,800 --> 00:29:18,240
Speaker 1: d nice guy speaking of Yeah, Foy Island is back,

569
00:29:18,360 --> 00:29:22,480
Speaker 1: baby perfect Strangers to Fight Island two is back. U

570
00:29:23,400 --> 00:29:27,040
Speaker 1: check out my instagram to see the story of like

571
00:29:27,160 --> 00:29:28,719
Speaker 1: you can meet the cast and see all the new

572
00:29:28,800 --> 00:29:32,120
Speaker 1: cast members and uh see a little pro clip. I'm

573
00:29:32,120 --> 00:29:34,640
Speaker 1: gonna put one up later today that it involves me.

574
00:29:35,360 --> 00:29:37,280
Speaker 1: That is not very flattering, but I'm gonna put it

575
00:29:37,360 --> 00:29:39,520
Speaker 1: up anyway because it's all they gave me. And let's

576
00:29:39,560 --> 00:29:47,200
Speaker 1: get to the news. But it's Tuesday. You know what

577
00:29:47,280 --> 00:29:49,040
Speaker 1: that means, folks, It is Tuesday. I hope you're having

578
00:29:49,040 --> 00:29:56,560
Speaker 1: all the swells out there apparently connection. Um yeah. They

579
00:29:56,640 --> 00:29:58,160
Speaker 1: gave me a clip of the show and I'm just

580
00:29:58,280 --> 00:30:01,880
Speaker 1: like they they cut out me saying god damn, which

581
00:30:02,040 --> 00:30:04,760
Speaker 1: makes the timing of the jokes so much funnier because

582
00:30:04,800 --> 00:30:06,520
Speaker 1: I say, you know the girls are gonna judge you

583
00:30:07,800 --> 00:30:11,360
Speaker 1: as you walk across this. You know, you know the

584
00:30:11,400 --> 00:30:13,360
Speaker 1: girls are gonna judge you solely based on your looks,

585
00:30:13,360 --> 00:30:14,760
Speaker 1: so you can see how it feels for once and

586
00:30:14,840 --> 00:30:18,200
Speaker 1: you're goddamn lives And they cut out goddamn. So it

587
00:30:18,280 --> 00:30:20,840
Speaker 1: just goes so the girls are gonna watch you walk

588
00:30:20,920 --> 00:30:23,440
Speaker 1: and judge you by your looks. Um, so you can

589
00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:25,280
Speaker 1: see what it feels like for once. I do Lives.

590
00:30:25,760 --> 00:30:27,400
Speaker 1: It just like comes out and it's just like makes

591
00:30:27,440 --> 00:30:30,040
Speaker 1: me look the joke was it builds up to me

592
00:30:30,160 --> 00:30:32,640
Speaker 1: being crazy. I go from a host like the girls

593
00:30:32,680 --> 00:30:35,880
Speaker 1: are gonna judge you goddamn is part of the progression

594
00:30:35,960 --> 00:30:39,680
Speaker 1: of the joke. It's a part of the joke. People

595
00:30:39,760 --> 00:30:41,960
Speaker 1: cut around my jokes all the time and I can't

596
00:30:42,040 --> 00:30:45,080
Speaker 1: stand it, like it makes me look insane, like I

597
00:30:45,280 --> 00:30:47,760
Speaker 1: feel right now because I watched this clip and I'm like,

598
00:30:47,840 --> 00:30:49,440
Speaker 1: I don't want to clip. I don't want to post

599
00:30:49,520 --> 00:30:51,800
Speaker 1: this now if you weren't gonna use me saying God

600
00:30:51,880 --> 00:30:55,240
Speaker 1: damn because the show is so precious that we can't

601
00:30:55,240 --> 00:30:58,640
Speaker 1: offend the religious right of saying God damn. What are

602
00:30:58,640 --> 00:31:00,160
Speaker 1: you gonna go to hell? You're probably gonna go hell

603
00:31:00,200 --> 00:31:02,240
Speaker 1: because you invented a show called f Boy Island and

604
00:31:02,320 --> 00:31:05,040
Speaker 1: you put it on your fucking platforms. Maybe that will

605
00:31:05,080 --> 00:31:07,680
Speaker 1: get you in hell. No, we're you saying god having

606
00:31:07,720 --> 00:31:11,160
Speaker 1: the host say goddamn, so they take out goddamn. So

607
00:31:11,880 --> 00:31:14,280
Speaker 1: I just look, it takes away the joke. People don't

608
00:31:14,320 --> 00:31:17,840
Speaker 1: understand jokes. I was watching on Instagram yesterday and there

609
00:31:17,960 --> 00:31:23,960
Speaker 1: was a great joke made by um Julio Garatti, and

610
00:31:24,600 --> 00:31:29,240
Speaker 1: it was such a good joke. It's a great joke,

611
00:31:29,360 --> 00:31:31,920
Speaker 1: but guess what, The punchline was given away in the

612
00:31:32,040 --> 00:31:34,560
Speaker 1: caption before he said it, and so it took away

613
00:31:34,640 --> 00:31:38,320
Speaker 1: from the funniness of it. They do this all the time. People,

614
00:31:39,160 --> 00:31:43,719
Speaker 1: You're not funny, so leave editing. Editors. Shout out to editors,

615
00:31:43,800 --> 00:31:46,320
Speaker 1: you need to be funnier. You need to not put

616
00:31:46,960 --> 00:31:50,480
Speaker 1: don't take out things. But this wasn't an editor's fault.

617
00:31:50,520 --> 00:31:53,120
Speaker 1: This was HBO going we can't have her say goddamn

618
00:31:53,640 --> 00:31:59,360
Speaker 1: in a in a clipse, and this is kind. I

619
00:31:59,440 --> 00:32:02,720
Speaker 1: can only imagine what they thought of the promos we did.

620
00:32:03,240 --> 00:32:07,240
Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, well that I just I just saw

621
00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:09,160
Speaker 1: a lot of this happen on my E show. I

622
00:32:09,200 --> 00:32:11,240
Speaker 1: see it happened all the time. Unless it's my stand

623
00:32:11,320 --> 00:32:13,920
Speaker 1: up special where I get to control what gets taken out,

624
00:32:14,680 --> 00:32:17,720
Speaker 1: they will suck. You can never judge me based on

625
00:32:17,840 --> 00:32:19,680
Speaker 1: how I'm being being funny on a show that I

626
00:32:19,720 --> 00:32:21,920
Speaker 1: didn't at it. Please don't, because I promise you I

627
00:32:22,000 --> 00:32:24,320
Speaker 1: was funnier than it ended up. Because there's so many

628
00:32:24,400 --> 00:32:27,160
Speaker 1: things on Welcome Home, Nickick cleanser question mark. Then I'm like,

629
00:32:28,040 --> 00:32:30,640
Speaker 1: what does this even mean? We're doing a call back

630
00:32:30,720 --> 00:32:32,480
Speaker 1: to something that you didn't even do the setup for,

631
00:32:32,920 --> 00:32:36,160
Speaker 1: so we look insane. Do not understand? You can't put

632
00:32:36,200 --> 00:32:39,480
Speaker 1: a ham drip slash call back to a joke that

633
00:32:39,560 --> 00:32:41,720
Speaker 1: you didn't allow the audience to see the setup of

634
00:32:42,080 --> 00:32:45,080
Speaker 1: a callback. The only way it can exist is that

635
00:32:45,200 --> 00:32:48,480
Speaker 1: if it has its first part two, you can't do

636
00:32:48,800 --> 00:32:51,840
Speaker 1: the end without the beginning. What are you doing? So

637
00:32:51,960 --> 00:32:55,320
Speaker 1: it just makes us look fucking insane. It happens over

638
00:32:55,440 --> 00:32:57,800
Speaker 1: and over and I don't know how to control it.

639
00:32:58,880 --> 00:33:01,720
Speaker 1: You know what it is, the control more callbacks. No

640
00:33:01,840 --> 00:33:04,240
Speaker 1: more callbacks in any reality team. Next time we do

641
00:33:04,320 --> 00:33:06,960
Speaker 1: the show, I'm not doing callbacks. I'm not. I'm not.

642
00:33:07,760 --> 00:33:09,880
Speaker 1: It's not the editor's fault. It's not ease fault. It's

643
00:33:09,960 --> 00:33:12,520
Speaker 1: not the show runner's fault. It's no one's fault. They

644
00:33:12,640 --> 00:33:15,840
Speaker 1: just don't have enough. It's time's fault. It's advertiser's fault

645
00:33:15,880 --> 00:33:18,440
Speaker 1: because they don't have enough time to include the setup,

646
00:33:18,720 --> 00:33:22,400
Speaker 1: and the callback is easier. It's easier to cut around

647
00:33:22,400 --> 00:33:25,280
Speaker 1: the set up than the callback. Oftentimes, when callbacks are

648
00:33:25,320 --> 00:33:27,560
Speaker 1: just put in and then not setups, it's a it's

649
00:33:27,600 --> 00:33:30,920
Speaker 1: a lazy choice, but it's true because these people are

650
00:33:31,040 --> 00:33:34,160
Speaker 1: being paid enough probably to go, okay, well we need

651
00:33:34,240 --> 00:33:36,440
Speaker 1: to cut out two seconds of this. Oh well that

652
00:33:36,520 --> 00:33:38,920
Speaker 1: little joke at the beginning. Well okay, now that you

653
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:40,920
Speaker 1: cut that little joke at the beginning, the end part

654
00:33:41,360 --> 00:33:44,120
Speaker 1: where I say, and you know, his shoes weren on,

655
00:33:44,880 --> 00:33:48,040
Speaker 1: it makes no I look like an insane person. It

656
00:33:48,200 --> 00:33:50,800
Speaker 1: makes me look insane so much more than I am.

657
00:33:50,920 --> 00:33:55,040
Speaker 1: And I'm insane when you take out God damn, listen

658
00:33:55,080 --> 00:33:56,400
Speaker 1: to this. Can I just plan it for you? How

659
00:33:56,520 --> 00:34:00,400
Speaker 1: insane I sound? This is? This is the clip, and

660
00:34:02,120 --> 00:34:04,320
Speaker 1: you keep giving me jobs. But like, come on, guys,

661
00:34:04,600 --> 00:34:08,799
Speaker 1: let's let's all work together to not to not take

662
00:34:08,840 --> 00:34:12,560
Speaker 1: out funny stuff like know what you are good about,

663
00:34:12,640 --> 00:34:15,960
Speaker 1: knowing comedy and knowing when things need to be. Like

664
00:34:16,040 --> 00:34:17,600
Speaker 1: all the clips that we do from the show, I've

665
00:34:17,719 --> 00:34:21,400
Speaker 1: never once been like, oh, she could have like she didn't.

666
00:34:21,560 --> 00:34:23,120
Speaker 1: They didn't cut this right. I know you don't do

667
00:34:23,200 --> 00:34:25,960
Speaker 1: the cutting yourself, but you tell them what to make. Yeah.

668
00:34:26,080 --> 00:34:28,040
Speaker 1: I mean, but that's because I I listened to you,

669
00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:32,040
Speaker 1: and I taken the information and I understand what it

670
00:34:32,200 --> 00:34:36,840
Speaker 1: is that you like. For example, yeah, no, no please,

671
00:34:37,200 --> 00:34:40,040
Speaker 1: I was gonna say that. I got to see you

672
00:34:40,160 --> 00:34:41,960
Speaker 1: guys this weekend, and we were hanging out in the

673
00:34:42,040 --> 00:34:45,799
Speaker 1: green room and it was maybe like five minutes before

674
00:34:45,840 --> 00:34:48,000
Speaker 1: the show start, like ten minutes before the show started,

675
00:34:48,400 --> 00:34:50,719
Speaker 1: and you and Andrew and Anya You're like, okay, let's

676
00:34:50,719 --> 00:34:55,960
Speaker 1: come up with like Phoenix specific jokes. I just my

677
00:34:56,120 --> 00:34:59,360
Speaker 1: mind was blown and out quickly. You didn't everything was

678
00:34:59,520 --> 00:35:03,640
Speaker 1: so funny and like so relatable, especially like me being

679
00:35:03,920 --> 00:35:07,360
Speaker 1: from this area now and like understanding how much like

680
00:35:07,560 --> 00:35:10,920
Speaker 1: that joke is going to hit. I was so thoroughly impressed.

681
00:35:10,920 --> 00:35:13,200
Speaker 1: I just want to say it was definitely a highlight

682
00:35:13,320 --> 00:35:16,000
Speaker 1: for me. That that is something that I would like

683
00:35:16,080 --> 00:35:17,360
Speaker 1: to put on in the reality show if we do

684
00:35:17,440 --> 00:35:20,000
Speaker 1: it again. Of like those, I've been doing those. When

685
00:35:20,040 --> 00:35:21,840
Speaker 1: I go to a town, I just look up interesting

686
00:35:21,880 --> 00:35:25,200
Speaker 1: facts and I literally do it ten minutes before showtime.

687
00:35:25,360 --> 00:35:31,719
Speaker 1: We should tell him somewhere many fucking good ones that

688
00:35:32,360 --> 00:35:34,560
Speaker 1: it was the most fun. It's the most fun thing

689
00:35:34,640 --> 00:35:36,800
Speaker 1: for me to do on the road, and yeah, we

690
00:35:36,880 --> 00:35:39,920
Speaker 1: had some good what did we say? Um my my

691
00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:47,760
Speaker 1: favorite one where oh yeah, there was like and forget

692
00:35:47,800 --> 00:35:49,879
Speaker 1: what I would spell, but in Phoenix, if you cut

693
00:35:49,960 --> 00:35:52,640
Speaker 1: down a cactus, you get twenty five years of prison

694
00:35:52,800 --> 00:35:56,840
Speaker 1: in prison, up to twenty years in prison. This protected

695
00:35:56,880 --> 00:35:59,759
Speaker 1: cactus called a swarow. And No was the one who

696
00:35:59,800 --> 00:36:02,240
Speaker 1: told about it, and she was like, but it's pronounced

697
00:36:02,280 --> 00:36:06,000
Speaker 1: sarrow because it's spelled different right differently, It's like s

698
00:36:06,080 --> 00:36:08,719
Speaker 1: and you a r oh yeah, And she was like, no,

699
00:36:08,800 --> 00:36:10,520
Speaker 1: it's sawarro, And so I wrote don suarrow and I

700
00:36:10,600 --> 00:36:12,360
Speaker 1: was like, okay, I'll just say that I remember that

701
00:36:12,480 --> 00:36:16,680
Speaker 1: by by. That's um that's how I That's what I

702
00:36:16,880 --> 00:36:18,680
Speaker 1: sound like when I have a penis in my mouth

703
00:36:18,719 --> 00:36:22,640
Speaker 1: and I go for fuarro and that's and I loved that.

704
00:36:23,880 --> 00:36:27,200
Speaker 1: Um uh. And then we came up with like if

705
00:36:27,239 --> 00:36:29,359
Speaker 1: you chop down that cactus and you get twenty five

706
00:36:29,440 --> 00:36:32,200
Speaker 1: years in prison, like people just sharing like what they're

707
00:36:32,239 --> 00:36:34,359
Speaker 1: in for, Like, dude, what are you in for? He's great,

708
00:36:34,440 --> 00:36:37,640
Speaker 1: and you're like, what about you? He's like murder and

709
00:36:37,680 --> 00:36:39,360
Speaker 1: you're he's They're like what about you? And you're like

710
00:36:40,520 --> 00:36:43,200
Speaker 1: I just had to have a cactus man? And then

711
00:36:43,320 --> 00:36:45,240
Speaker 1: Andrew added, you should have seen what it was wearing

712
00:36:47,239 --> 00:36:51,000
Speaker 1: ozo is onthing like how sharp it went like it

713
00:36:51,120 --> 00:36:53,200
Speaker 1: was holding a sharp No, I don't know, I forget

714
00:36:53,239 --> 00:36:56,160
Speaker 1: what something was sharp. There was something with doesn't always

715
00:36:56,200 --> 00:37:00,399
Speaker 1: looked like you're saying, put your hands off surrounding didn't.

716
00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:03,399
Speaker 1: I didn't do anything, mad, I didn't do anything. They're

717
00:37:03,440 --> 00:37:06,320
Speaker 1: so defensive they are. And what were you up to

718
00:37:06,480 --> 00:37:10,279
Speaker 1: cactus with your sunglasses on doing a boogie woogie? Oh wait,

719
00:37:10,400 --> 00:37:12,040
Speaker 1: that's the one you buy the Walgreens That would be

720
00:37:12,080 --> 00:37:14,840
Speaker 1: like they're the skunk. They're the skunk of trees. No,

721
00:37:15,000 --> 00:37:20,480
Speaker 1: not skunk. Fuck, what's the porcupine of trees? Are the porcupine?

722
00:37:20,520 --> 00:37:22,719
Speaker 1: That's kind of suck to like always have that on

723
00:37:22,800 --> 00:37:26,880
Speaker 1: your back. I think I think they shoot him out,

724
00:37:26,960 --> 00:37:30,640
Speaker 1: so like they they're not always. Yeah, it's like the stingray.

725
00:37:30,800 --> 00:37:33,160
Speaker 1: Like you think if you touch a stingray, it's like

726
00:37:33,239 --> 00:37:35,840
Speaker 1: going to stab you just from being touched. But it

727
00:37:35,920 --> 00:37:37,480
Speaker 1: has to like shoot it out. Oh. I just got

728
00:37:37,600 --> 00:37:41,640
Speaker 1: a memory of a catfish. This kid, Jason Ultra, stepped

729
00:37:41,680 --> 00:37:43,919
Speaker 1: on and it went right through his foot. Oh God,

730
00:37:45,040 --> 00:37:48,560
Speaker 1: that's Florida, and they're going to judge you solely based

731
00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:50,360
Speaker 1: on your looks, just so you can see how it

732
00:37:50,440 --> 00:37:53,839
Speaker 1: feels for once in your life. Oh yeah, that's bad,

733
00:37:54,040 --> 00:37:59,359
Speaker 1: once in your goddamn lives. Goddamn you need it. Felt

734
00:37:59,480 --> 00:38:03,319
Speaker 1: like maybe because you're angry, it hits. It hits more

735
00:38:03,480 --> 00:38:05,920
Speaker 1: that it's not there because of the ramp you just

736
00:38:06,000 --> 00:38:08,880
Speaker 1: went on. But I also do feel like you. I

737
00:38:09,000 --> 00:38:10,919
Speaker 1: don't even want to post it because it makes people

738
00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:14,120
Speaker 1: are gonna go this host sucks and it's like the

739
00:38:14,280 --> 00:38:17,279
Speaker 1: joke you need. I know that seems so inconsequential that

740
00:38:17,480 --> 00:38:20,640
Speaker 1: God damn. But it allows the ramp. It's funny to

741
00:38:20,680 --> 00:38:22,840
Speaker 1: see someone go from like I'm a host to like

742
00:38:23,040 --> 00:38:24,919
Speaker 1: losing their mind. But if it happens in one word,

743
00:38:25,000 --> 00:38:29,399
Speaker 1: it doesn't make sense if you see the progression exactly, yes,

744
00:38:29,560 --> 00:38:31,640
Speaker 1: and that's it looks a little turrets anyway, but it

745
00:38:31,760 --> 00:38:34,480
Speaker 1: needs that God damn. But it's just like I'm just

746
00:38:34,880 --> 00:38:36,640
Speaker 1: just don't even put the joke in then put something

747
00:38:36,680 --> 00:38:40,000
Speaker 1: else in. I just can't. I can't deal with it. Um.

748
00:38:40,320 --> 00:38:42,359
Speaker 1: And that's why I can't watch anything I do. It's

749
00:38:42,400 --> 00:38:45,919
Speaker 1: because it just ends up in the hands of people

750
00:38:46,000 --> 00:38:47,800
Speaker 1: that are just trying to do their job and and

751
00:38:47,920 --> 00:38:50,719
Speaker 1: follow network instructions of like, we need to cut this down,

752
00:38:51,040 --> 00:38:53,479
Speaker 1: this is too much. That's gonna offend this for people.

753
00:38:54,000 --> 00:38:56,239
Speaker 1: But the word goddamn, which I know they cut not

754
00:38:56,400 --> 00:38:59,440
Speaker 1: for time because promos don't need a time limit. They

755
00:38:59,520 --> 00:39:03,840
Speaker 1: cut it be because of the Christian right. Um, that

756
00:39:04,040 --> 00:39:06,640
Speaker 1: is so stupid and hypocritical. You're doing a show called

757
00:39:06,760 --> 00:39:09,640
Speaker 1: f Boy Island. I think you can put it should

758
00:39:09,680 --> 00:39:14,480
Speaker 1: have said damn, that would have been different, all right,

759
00:39:14,560 --> 00:39:19,640
Speaker 1: let's continue. That would be what if they yeah, what

760
00:39:19,719 --> 00:39:23,440
Speaker 1: if they put in a different voice in there? It

761
00:39:23,440 --> 00:39:25,640
Speaker 1: would have been fine if they would have had me go, hey,

762
00:39:25,680 --> 00:39:29,360
Speaker 1: can you just put in like God, good darn Like

763
00:39:29,440 --> 00:39:31,400
Speaker 1: if I would have said something like I could have

764
00:39:31,440 --> 00:39:32,880
Speaker 1: done a voice over for it. I don't know how

765
00:39:32,920 --> 00:39:35,719
Speaker 1: much just they just make choices because guess what, it's not.

766
00:39:36,400 --> 00:39:38,760
Speaker 1: It's not going to affect viewership. It's just gonna affect

767
00:39:38,800 --> 00:39:40,839
Speaker 1: people if they want to see me on that show again,

768
00:39:41,160 --> 00:39:43,640
Speaker 1: which I wouldn't. And then the promo for the f

769
00:39:43,800 --> 00:39:47,279
Speaker 1: boy I'm not in it at all, great too, Thanks

770
00:39:47,440 --> 00:39:51,480
Speaker 1: HBO Max, Max, the guy that looked at my vagina yesterday.

771
00:39:52,600 --> 00:39:57,759
Speaker 1: Call you have to be out of context. Do listen

772
00:39:57,760 --> 00:40:01,799
Speaker 1: to yesterday's episode yeah, as the clip yeah, and then

773
00:40:01,880 --> 00:40:06,800
Speaker 1: set up the clip about that's so funny. I'm like

774
00:40:06,880 --> 00:40:08,920
Speaker 1: scared now that HBO is gonna give me a job

775
00:40:08,960 --> 00:40:11,719
Speaker 1: because I insulted them. But um, if you don't give

776
00:40:11,719 --> 00:40:13,640
Speaker 1: me a job because I'm mad about that, then that's

777
00:40:13,719 --> 00:40:18,279
Speaker 1: on you, stupid. If anything will probably give you more work. Yeah,

778
00:40:18,520 --> 00:40:22,200
Speaker 1: I negged them hardy. I want to get one news

779
00:40:22,239 --> 00:40:27,799
Speaker 1: story in yes, okay, say goodbye to Internet Explore. Microsoft

780
00:40:27,880 --> 00:40:31,799
Speaker 1: back to retire the web browser tomorrow, twenty seven years

781
00:40:31,840 --> 00:40:36,560
Speaker 1: after its first launched back. Isn't that what we know?

782
00:40:36,680 --> 00:40:40,960
Speaker 1: We have Safari the Internet explored with the EU with

783
00:40:41,040 --> 00:40:43,680
Speaker 1: a little rocket coming out of it. So here's here's

784
00:40:43,680 --> 00:40:50,360
Speaker 1: some reminders of ready uh the the Billboard year end

785
00:40:50,440 --> 00:40:54,200
Speaker 1: hot one singles coming in at number one, any guesses,

786
00:40:55,080 --> 00:40:57,960
Speaker 1: Hoodie and the Blowfish, Um, I only want to be

787
00:40:58,120 --> 00:41:04,400
Speaker 1: with you and crow so Santa Mon a couple of

788
00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:08,600
Speaker 1: fard Where was I? It was high school sophomore year,

789
00:41:08,880 --> 00:41:18,160
Speaker 1: No way for freshman year, ver Verve, It's Gangsters Paradise

790
00:41:18,280 --> 00:41:23,960
Speaker 1: by Coolio the year, and then Waterfalls and Creep coming

791
00:41:24,000 --> 00:41:25,799
Speaker 1: at number two and three. So TLC had a very

792
00:41:25,840 --> 00:41:32,320
Speaker 1: good year. Clueless was released, Oh my god, it was

793
00:41:32,440 --> 00:41:37,399
Speaker 1: the best, most iconic movies, so iconic, and the show

794
00:41:37,520 --> 00:41:42,759
Speaker 1: sparked a sexy, preppy trend of shortened tartan skirts, fitted blazers,

795
00:41:42,800 --> 00:41:46,520
Speaker 1: collared shirts, argyle and over the knee socks and her

796
00:41:46,600 --> 00:41:50,600
Speaker 1: little pens with like little uh things on the end

797
00:41:51,120 --> 00:41:56,360
Speaker 1: and saying as if and I'm still baked? What you

798
00:41:56,480 --> 00:41:59,000
Speaker 1: remember that scene? You always referenced that scene, I ever

799
00:41:59,160 --> 00:42:02,640
Speaker 1: remember it. It's always my favorite. What is it that

800
00:42:02,760 --> 00:42:05,520
Speaker 1: Almo's ruined my high I'm still baked? There at the

801
00:42:05,640 --> 00:42:10,319
Speaker 1: party and Fason comes in and wait, who says I'm

802
00:42:10,320 --> 00:42:13,160
Speaker 1: still baked? She does. I don't know who she is,

803
00:42:13,239 --> 00:42:17,320
Speaker 1: the main girl. They come in, they get in a

804
00:42:17,520 --> 00:42:21,719
Speaker 1: horrible fight that almost ruined my boss, and she knows

805
00:42:21,800 --> 00:42:24,239
Speaker 1: I'm still big. Why is I'm still baked funny? I

806
00:42:25,040 --> 00:42:27,120
Speaker 1: don't know. It's just a funny like line to me.

807
00:42:27,920 --> 00:42:29,880
Speaker 1: But is it funny now or was it funny as

808
00:42:29,880 --> 00:42:32,480
Speaker 1: a kid, Because there's nothing there's so many other lines

809
00:42:32,520 --> 00:42:35,000
Speaker 1: and that are funny. I'm still baked after someone says

810
00:42:35,000 --> 00:42:37,719
Speaker 1: I almost lose my bus. That's being like, oh, I'm

811
00:42:37,760 --> 00:42:40,320
Speaker 1: not hungry anymore. I'm still hungry, Like what's funny about that?

812
00:42:41,200 --> 00:42:43,919
Speaker 1: Just so no, I know, it's just so cheesy. It's

813
00:42:43,960 --> 00:42:47,560
Speaker 1: like it's it reminds me of like when I, uh,

814
00:42:49,480 --> 00:42:51,560
Speaker 1: like my friends opened up a liquor cabinet and I

815
00:42:51,680 --> 00:42:54,719
Speaker 1: was like, hey, Jim beams over there, and they like

816
00:42:55,480 --> 00:42:59,000
Speaker 1: that line they like destroyed me for because it's just

817
00:42:59,160 --> 00:43:03,160
Speaker 1: such a It's just it's like a kind of yeah, yeah, okay,

818
00:43:03,200 --> 00:43:05,880
Speaker 1: that makes sense of just trying over there, like pointing

819
00:43:05,920 --> 00:43:13,279
Speaker 1: out one liquor, like the one about we were good

820
00:43:13,320 --> 00:43:16,440
Speaker 1: at pointing out like that you know that that that

821
00:43:16,640 --> 00:43:19,799
Speaker 1: shot from the sunny D commercial where it's inside the refrigerator.

822
00:43:20,000 --> 00:43:21,360
Speaker 1: That's the shot I want to see if you and

823
00:43:21,440 --> 00:43:24,040
Speaker 1: your friends going through the liquor cabinet and then like

824
00:43:24,160 --> 00:43:25,879
Speaker 1: kind of sorting through and they're like, oh, we got

825
00:43:25,960 --> 00:43:27,680
Speaker 1: this over here, and you go Jim Beams over there,

826
00:43:27,719 --> 00:43:30,000
Speaker 1: and then they all stop and just turn around and

827
00:43:30,080 --> 00:43:33,160
Speaker 1: look at you in the corner going Jim Beams over there.

828
00:43:34,480 --> 00:43:38,560
Speaker 1: Exactly what happened, dude. It was very embarrassing. And yeah,

829
00:43:38,760 --> 00:43:40,879
Speaker 1: and I watched that sunny D commercial last night because

830
00:43:40,880 --> 00:43:43,719
Speaker 1: it was on Reddit on like the nostalgia thing and

831
00:43:44,080 --> 00:43:46,840
Speaker 1: the one where they're like great like purple stuff soda,

832
00:43:47,120 --> 00:43:49,239
Speaker 1: Oh sunny D And it's in the back and they

833
00:43:49,239 --> 00:43:53,000
Speaker 1: are teenage boys that are genuinely like in their thirties

834
00:43:53,040 --> 00:43:56,000
Speaker 1: in this commercial and they get so then they're all

835
00:43:56,040 --> 00:43:57,640
Speaker 1: out by the pool drinking the sunny D and one

836
00:43:57,680 --> 00:44:00,799
Speaker 1: of them finishes it and they almost attack this kid

837
00:44:00,920 --> 00:44:03,799
Speaker 1: like he's going to be like, I'm really worried about

838
00:44:03,800 --> 00:44:05,920
Speaker 1: this kid's safety. How how mad they are, and then

839
00:44:05,960 --> 00:44:07,879
Speaker 1: the mom pops out of nowhere and goes, I got

840
00:44:07,960 --> 00:44:10,160
Speaker 1: some more, and they're like, oh, you came in right

841
00:44:10,200 --> 00:44:12,439
Speaker 1: into the cut mrs before they were going to beat

842
00:44:12,480 --> 00:44:15,080
Speaker 1: this kid. I mean, it is so funny, how angry.

843
00:44:15,120 --> 00:44:17,040
Speaker 1: I literally was watching it being like why would they

844
00:44:17,120 --> 00:44:19,440
Speaker 1: have this? This looks violent because all the kids are

845
00:44:19,520 --> 00:44:22,840
Speaker 1: like getting ready and they're adult men being teenagers. I

846
00:44:22,920 --> 00:44:25,120
Speaker 1: gotta show it to you. It's so funny. Pull up that, like,

847
00:44:25,200 --> 00:44:27,600
Speaker 1: for your own sake, whatever, you remember that Sunny d

848
00:44:27,719 --> 00:44:29,480
Speaker 1: Ad if you if you remember what I'm talking about,

849
00:44:29,960 --> 00:44:32,680
Speaker 1: it is so much more violent than what was the

850
00:44:32,760 --> 00:44:36,040
Speaker 1: other thing. Your mom's got not che d, your mom's

851
00:44:36,080 --> 00:44:40,120
Speaker 1: got stove top that blew up. Don't remember that? Really? No?

852
00:44:40,440 --> 00:44:43,680
Speaker 1: I remember remember that. Just mom's always coming in and

853
00:44:43,840 --> 00:44:51,080
Speaker 1: like camburger. No, I don't know. Maybe I'm alone here,

854
00:44:51,080 --> 00:44:53,239
Speaker 1: but I remember stove toping. I but that is one.

855
00:44:53,280 --> 00:44:57,120
Speaker 1: I mean that was such a trope in nineties, like

856
00:44:57,239 --> 00:45:00,399
Speaker 1: the mom comes in and and she saved the day,

857
00:45:00,440 --> 00:45:02,719
Speaker 1: and she's like I'm a good mom, and everyone's like,

858
00:45:02,880 --> 00:45:05,680
Speaker 1: yeah you are. Yeah. I want to find the Sunny

859
00:45:05,760 --> 00:45:07,160
Speaker 1: Dad because I want you to watch it and have

860
00:45:07,239 --> 00:45:11,800
Speaker 1: a reaction video Sunny d commercial. In the meantime, Tommy

861
00:45:11,920 --> 00:45:16,200
Speaker 1: Boy also came out. God I watched that the other day,

862
00:45:16,200 --> 00:45:18,319
Speaker 1: and it was so freaking I can't even stand there.

863
00:45:19,280 --> 00:45:22,719
Speaker 1: When he goes, I'm not baked anymore. Oh my god. Okay,

864
00:45:22,760 --> 00:45:24,800
Speaker 1: so just watch this part. Andrew just pressed play. This

865
00:45:24,880 --> 00:45:26,880
Speaker 1: is when the boys finish it and they started attacking.

866
00:45:26,920 --> 00:45:36,160
Speaker 1: Here one boy finishes it. Problem. Don't they look like

867
00:45:36,200 --> 00:45:40,000
Speaker 1: they're about to like disembowel him. I mean, it was

868
00:45:40,080 --> 00:45:41,719
Speaker 1: so quick. I thought it was going to be go back,

869
00:45:41,760 --> 00:45:51,160
Speaker 1: go back. Wait, wait, they look like they're about to

870
00:45:51,280 --> 00:45:54,560
Speaker 1: hurt him. I was worried for if I was a

871
00:45:54,680 --> 00:45:57,400
Speaker 1: director of that commercial, I'd say, hey, can we tone

872
00:45:57,560 --> 00:46:01,800
Speaker 1: down the attack, I'd a bit up. He's going to

873
00:46:01,840 --> 00:46:04,640
Speaker 1: get bullied to death for finishing the Sunny D. Do

874
00:46:04,719 --> 00:46:07,720
Speaker 1: you remember Sunny D? How disgusting it was. It hurts

875
00:46:09,719 --> 00:46:12,480
Speaker 1: a taste like gasoline, and it was like, yeah, it's

876
00:46:14,600 --> 00:46:16,799
Speaker 1: like the after tap. It was bad. It was bad.

877
00:46:17,360 --> 00:46:22,160
Speaker 1: It's like if if O J committed more murder. Oh no,

878
00:46:23,600 --> 00:46:27,080
Speaker 1: oh my guitar teacher is here. That's who was here? Fuck?

879
00:46:27,719 --> 00:46:33,640
Speaker 1: Oh fuck I forgot No, this was twenty minutes ago.

880
00:46:33,960 --> 00:46:39,240
Speaker 1: Oh fuck, um I was doing my podcast. Oh Luisi,

881
00:46:39,320 --> 00:46:44,920
Speaker 1: you were right. Luisi was right a lot. I'm so sorry.

882
00:46:46,080 --> 00:46:51,360
Speaker 1: I will pay you double for this one. I'm so sorry,

883
00:46:51,680 --> 00:46:57,000
Speaker 1: Oh my god. Oh not writing things down to my schedule.

884
00:46:57,640 --> 00:47:00,400
Speaker 1: I just can't do this anymore. If you were a

885
00:47:00,440 --> 00:47:02,160
Speaker 1: guitar teacher and you showed up to a lesson they

886
00:47:02,200 --> 00:47:04,560
Speaker 1: weren't there, would it be good too if they paid

887
00:47:04,600 --> 00:47:08,279
Speaker 1: you double, Yeah, I'd like that makes up for it, right, yes,

888
00:47:08,800 --> 00:47:11,920
Speaker 1: and then some on the person. He also doesn't have

889
00:47:11,960 --> 00:47:14,040
Speaker 1: to hear you play. I mean it's great, Yeah, that's

890
00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:16,240
Speaker 1: a good thing too, but just lugging over his guitar

891
00:47:16,480 --> 00:47:19,759
Speaker 1: and like spending time. If I was dog walking and

892
00:47:19,920 --> 00:47:22,080
Speaker 1: someone didn't answer and I waited five minutes and then

893
00:47:22,120 --> 00:47:24,359
Speaker 1: they paid me double, and then I go do whatever

894
00:47:24,440 --> 00:47:26,560
Speaker 1: the funk I want. It's not like he's out there

895
00:47:26,600 --> 00:47:30,439
Speaker 1: being like, oh oh no, you know, he's just living

896
00:47:30,480 --> 00:47:32,560
Speaker 1: his life. Well he did hear me go, oh no,

897
00:47:32,760 --> 00:47:36,279
Speaker 1: one's here, Luigi. You fucking like he hed me mock

898
00:47:36,400 --> 00:47:40,320
Speaker 1: my oh yeah, yeah, do you have a machete? And

899
00:47:40,360 --> 00:47:42,600
Speaker 1: the guys like I don't have a reason we couldn't

900
00:47:42,640 --> 00:47:44,320
Speaker 1: hear him through the doorbell. He was because we have

901
00:47:44,440 --> 00:47:47,520
Speaker 1: headphones on and so I couldn't hear maybe a real

902
00:47:47,600 --> 00:47:49,600
Speaker 1: sound that was happening out in the hallway. God him,

903
00:47:49,640 --> 00:47:52,880
Speaker 1: such should have summed, he should have strump. Let's get

904
00:47:52,960 --> 00:47:54,560
Speaker 1: up to an amp next time. Do we have one

905
00:47:54,600 --> 00:47:57,080
Speaker 1: more story? I have a very funny story that I

906
00:47:57,160 --> 00:48:00,200
Speaker 1: saw that I was telling Andrew with International News is

907
00:48:00,520 --> 00:48:04,400
Speaker 1: take it away. So did you see the elephant story

908
00:48:05,120 --> 00:48:08,360
Speaker 1: recently that it's all over? Oh my god, it's so sad.

909
00:48:08,719 --> 00:48:12,319
Speaker 1: So this elephant trampled a woman to death, then went

910
00:48:12,360 --> 00:48:15,719
Speaker 1: to her funeral and trampled her again. I mean that

911
00:48:16,239 --> 00:48:19,920
Speaker 1: is it is so sad because I read about this,

912
00:48:20,360 --> 00:48:23,240
Speaker 1: and I was reading about how this woman was just filling,

913
00:48:23,480 --> 00:48:26,279
Speaker 1: like going to the fucking ravine to fill to get water,

914
00:48:26,400 --> 00:48:29,320
Speaker 1: to get drinking water. And this happens a lot of

915
00:48:29,400 --> 00:48:33,040
Speaker 1: times in India where the elephants. They're like constantly in

916
00:48:33,080 --> 00:48:35,440
Speaker 1: fear of elephants like trampling them. So this woman who

917
00:48:35,480 --> 00:48:37,640
Speaker 1: was just trying to get drinking water, which were like,

918
00:48:38,640 --> 00:48:41,160
Speaker 1: I don't know, this water tastes bad, it's not smart,

919
00:48:41,560 --> 00:48:45,400
Speaker 1: complaining about sunny d they loved. This woman gets trampled

920
00:48:45,480 --> 00:48:49,040
Speaker 1: to death. She does nothing, and then this elephant crashes

921
00:48:49,080 --> 00:48:52,680
Speaker 1: her funeral, pulls her out of the funeral higher whatever

922
00:48:52,719 --> 00:48:55,200
Speaker 1: it is, and then proceeds to trample her again, Like,

923
00:48:55,400 --> 00:48:59,560
Speaker 1: I mean, what were there? What was the beef? Like?

924
00:49:00,360 --> 00:49:02,800
Speaker 1: Not that I ever saw Godzilla, but I feel like

925
00:49:02,880 --> 00:49:06,520
Speaker 1: maybe it's something like that where the monster or whatever

926
00:49:06,640 --> 00:49:11,839
Speaker 1: falls in love with the woman. Oh did you ever

927
00:49:11,960 --> 00:49:14,000
Speaker 1: do you remember that story with the tigers at the

928
00:49:14,120 --> 00:49:20,040
Speaker 1: zoo the guys mocked them where and found them like

929
00:49:20,400 --> 00:49:23,960
Speaker 1: two miles away. Elephants never forget. I mean honestly, they don't.

930
00:49:24,640 --> 00:49:26,879
Speaker 1: But there must have been something about that woman either

931
00:49:27,000 --> 00:49:30,200
Speaker 1: there's something some maybe it was some like beef they

932
00:49:30,239 --> 00:49:33,279
Speaker 1: had in a past life or something, or you know,

933
00:49:34,360 --> 00:49:37,719
Speaker 1: I don't want to say that she was blamed for it.

934
00:49:37,840 --> 00:49:41,840
Speaker 1: Yeah she finished the sunny day in the past life's honestly,

935
00:49:41,920 --> 00:49:44,759
Speaker 1: what they are about to do to that pay so sad.

936
00:49:44,840 --> 00:49:46,480
Speaker 1: It made me so sad to read it. At first,

937
00:49:46,520 --> 00:49:48,359
Speaker 1: it was just like whoa, this is crazy. But then

938
00:49:48,719 --> 00:49:51,200
Speaker 1: I just kind of thought about all the people just

939
00:49:51,320 --> 00:49:53,799
Speaker 1: to get water, to get drinking water, to get bathing water,

940
00:49:53,880 --> 00:49:57,080
Speaker 1: they have to be scared that maybe a fucking hippo

941
00:49:57,360 --> 00:50:00,200
Speaker 1: or an elephant might trample them to death. Can you

942
00:50:00,320 --> 00:50:03,680
Speaker 1: fucking imagine? Like it just made me like so sad.

943
00:50:03,960 --> 00:50:05,600
Speaker 1: At first, I was like, oh, this bitch probably hurt

944
00:50:05,640 --> 00:50:09,200
Speaker 1: this elephant, was you know, a circus tamer or something like.

945
00:50:09,239 --> 00:50:13,160
Speaker 1: I wanted the story to be vengeance from like getting abused,

946
00:50:13,480 --> 00:50:16,239
Speaker 1: but it wasn't. It was just this poor woman trying

947
00:50:16,280 --> 00:50:19,880
Speaker 1: to get water. So it was a bummer up. Hippos.

948
00:50:20,160 --> 00:50:24,080
Speaker 1: Everyone with hippos are the most dangerous animals because people

949
00:50:24,160 --> 00:50:28,920
Speaker 1: underestimate their speed underwater. Especially watch a hippo run underwater.

950
00:50:29,239 --> 00:50:32,000
Speaker 1: It is so fast it's wild. I just saw a

951
00:50:32,080 --> 00:50:33,880
Speaker 1: hippo take on like three lines and I was like,

952
00:50:34,360 --> 00:50:37,360
Speaker 1: who are these guys there? And their teeth are hilarious.

953
00:50:37,400 --> 00:50:40,560
Speaker 1: They look like rocks in there. They never you think

954
00:50:40,560 --> 00:50:42,000
Speaker 1: they're just going to stay in one place and just

955
00:50:42,080 --> 00:50:44,239
Speaker 1: like lunched forward and just makes me feel like I

956
00:50:44,320 --> 00:50:46,560
Speaker 1: could lose a few more teeth and be fine. Yeah

957
00:50:46,680 --> 00:50:51,040
Speaker 1: they're cool. Hip Yeah, thinks hippos. Okay, let's uh and

958
00:50:51,120 --> 00:50:54,759
Speaker 1: thinks hippop the the contract I side yesterday that Max

959
00:50:54,840 --> 00:50:57,360
Speaker 1: can't talk about me, but I can talk all about Max.

960
00:50:58,000 --> 00:51:04,359
Speaker 1: How did look in those pants? Let's take a quick

961
00:51:04,360 --> 00:51:08,520
Speaker 1: break and come back with why do I say? He

962
00:51:08,600 --> 00:51:10,279
Speaker 1: said him, Nick, I am here heading up now, I'm

963
00:51:10,280 --> 00:51:11,960
Speaker 1: outside your door. I knocked a bunch of times, heard

964
00:51:12,040 --> 00:51:14,080
Speaker 1: voices and a dog barking. Not sure if we're on today,

965
00:51:14,200 --> 00:51:15,880
Speaker 1: let me know either way? Things? What was I just

966
00:51:15,920 --> 00:51:19,840
Speaker 1: going to say? He's like, oh, she's practicing. Oh so okay,

967
00:51:19,920 --> 00:51:22,520
Speaker 1: we're back, let's do Why do I care? Why do

968
00:51:22,680 --> 00:51:25,440
Speaker 1: I care? Wait? Did you just say that? My guldar

969
00:51:25,520 --> 00:51:30,799
Speaker 1: teacher thought I was practicing because your dog park guitar sparking. Yes,

970
00:51:31,520 --> 00:51:36,680
Speaker 1: listen to me, listen. It took me a second. Sometimes

971
00:51:36,719 --> 00:51:40,200
Speaker 1: it's like, well, how about but more murder? You missed that?

972
00:51:40,320 --> 00:51:46,879
Speaker 1: Joe mur described so funny. It's like, oh, but you're

973
00:51:46,880 --> 00:51:51,560
Speaker 1: a guitar teacher ruined, it's so funny. All right? So wait,

974
00:51:51,680 --> 00:52:00,759
Speaker 1: so wait, so did you wait? Wait? Why do I wait?

975
00:52:00,800 --> 00:52:04,799
Speaker 1: Why do we care? Okay, so gentle, So I don't

976
00:52:04,800 --> 00:52:09,360
Speaker 1: even know why I said that? Why do it? Eric Dane,

977
00:52:09,960 --> 00:52:13,560
Speaker 1: who plays a closeted gay character on Euphoria and was

978
00:52:13,640 --> 00:52:17,320
Speaker 1: also known as mc steamy from Grey's Anatomy, tells Andy

979
00:52:17,400 --> 00:52:20,319
Speaker 1: Cohen that his d m s are filled with dick

980
00:52:20,400 --> 00:52:24,440
Speaker 1: picks and dirty messages from guys despite being straight, and

981
00:52:24,520 --> 00:52:27,000
Speaker 1: that he has a hard time finding dates because he's

982
00:52:27,040 --> 00:52:30,800
Speaker 1: not an app guy. Oh, Eric Dane, let's take a

983
00:52:30,800 --> 00:52:33,080
Speaker 1: look at what he looks. I mean, he's hand and

984
00:52:33,120 --> 00:52:36,600
Speaker 1: he is he a dad on the show? Yeah, he's

985
00:52:36,640 --> 00:52:39,279
Speaker 1: a he's a gay dad who's an alcoholic who has

986
00:52:39,320 --> 00:52:48,040
Speaker 1: sex with teenagers. And he tells Andy, I get lots

987
00:52:48,120 --> 00:52:52,719
Speaker 1: of dick pics. No, so then him and then yeah,

988
00:52:53,600 --> 00:52:56,399
Speaker 1: that's what he wore to the premiere of Euphoria. That's

989
00:52:56,400 --> 00:52:58,320
Speaker 1: not the best photo of him, No, it isn't. He

990
00:52:58,440 --> 00:53:02,279
Speaker 1: looks like he's um at a costume event, like where

991
00:53:02,440 --> 00:53:05,440
Speaker 1: someone magnetic. It looks like Ricky Martin, like a magnet

992
00:53:05,520 --> 00:53:09,719
Speaker 1: mustache needs to go to rehab. Um. Okay, so okay,

993
00:53:09,760 --> 00:53:11,799
Speaker 1: So he used to be married of Rebecca Gayhard. They

994
00:53:11,840 --> 00:53:14,640
Speaker 1: had a threesome that they filmed. I remember that that

995
00:53:14,760 --> 00:53:18,279
Speaker 1: was so hot. Him and two girls, two two girls,

996
00:53:18,440 --> 00:53:20,520
Speaker 1: him and his wife and a girl. Okay, go on, No,

997
00:53:20,640 --> 00:53:22,680
Speaker 1: u's are all right? So he told Andy, he's like,

998
00:53:22,719 --> 00:53:24,920
Speaker 1: I've seen a lot of ugly penises. I've seen a

999
00:53:25,000 --> 00:53:28,000
Speaker 1: lot of pretty ones. And then he says, I feel

1000
00:53:28,080 --> 00:53:30,120
Speaker 1: I feel like I don't ever meet women because look,

1001
00:53:30,160 --> 00:53:32,160
Speaker 1: I'm not a dating app guy, and I think that's

1002
00:53:32,239 --> 00:53:34,759
Speaker 1: kind of the where the majority of meeting happens on

1003
00:53:34,840 --> 00:53:38,600
Speaker 1: these dating apps, the various Rayahs, Tinders, whatever he goes.

1004
00:53:38,719 --> 00:53:41,839
Speaker 1: I'm I'm from the nineties, man, I'm more of a like, hey,

1005
00:53:41,960 --> 00:53:45,319
Speaker 1: how are you a kind of person? Yeah, you gotta

1006
00:53:45,360 --> 00:53:48,799
Speaker 1: get over that Eric Dane. Like it's app time now,

1007
00:53:49,120 --> 00:53:51,400
Speaker 1: Like you're ordering food on apps and maybe you're not.

1008
00:53:51,640 --> 00:53:56,839
Speaker 1: You're ordering your your clothing and your girl. It's where

1009
00:53:56,840 --> 00:53:59,840
Speaker 1: it's happening. You just got to give into the apps,

1010
00:53:59,880 --> 00:54:01,480
Speaker 1: like of him, a try get on Riot that guy.

1011
00:54:01,480 --> 00:54:04,439
Speaker 1: I will clean up on Ryan. I mean that guy. Yeah,

1012
00:54:04,520 --> 00:54:07,560
Speaker 1: I'm sure in between thirty dicks there's great tits. Like

1013
00:54:07,640 --> 00:54:10,360
Speaker 1: I'm sure he's also getting hit on the ship. Granted

1014
00:54:10,400 --> 00:54:14,279
Speaker 1: its fans, but yeah, that's I don't know, it's that's

1015
00:54:14,480 --> 00:54:16,239
Speaker 1: that's tough. I mean, I just think that people that go,

1016
00:54:16,320 --> 00:54:18,120
Speaker 1: I'm not a nap guy. I'm just tired of hearing

1017
00:54:18,200 --> 00:54:20,680
Speaker 1: that because it's like, you gotta evolve with the times,

1018
00:54:20,760 --> 00:54:24,200
Speaker 1: like things are different now. You can't. It's creepier to

1019
00:54:24,239 --> 00:54:25,600
Speaker 1: go up to a woman at a grocery store and

1020
00:54:25,719 --> 00:54:28,680
Speaker 1: just go, hey, you're like cereal too, Like that's just

1021
00:54:28,800 --> 00:54:33,640
Speaker 1: not gonna yeah pick in real life cereal killer. Yeah,

1022
00:54:33,760 --> 00:54:36,600
Speaker 1: that's weird. Yeah, just giving a polaroid of a dick

1023
00:54:36,640 --> 00:54:41,359
Speaker 1: pick passing it to a woman in line the whole food,

1024
00:54:41,480 --> 00:54:45,880
Speaker 1: yeahs are just look at Yeah, but I didn't. I

1025
00:54:46,120 --> 00:54:49,920
Speaker 1: rarely unblur something. You know, Everything that gets sent to

1026
00:54:49,960 --> 00:54:52,879
Speaker 1: me is blurred, and I rarely like spend the time

1027
00:54:52,880 --> 00:54:54,480
Speaker 1: because you have to like click it and then click

1028
00:54:54,520 --> 00:54:57,120
Speaker 1: again and then approve it. And it's like, I don't

1029
00:54:57,160 --> 00:54:59,839
Speaker 1: think any like unless it's a bestie who's like, hey,

1030
00:55:00,040 --> 00:55:01,640
Speaker 1: I thought, like I thought I saw this and thought

1031
00:55:01,680 --> 00:55:03,560
Speaker 1: of you. And it's like, and now guys are gonna

1032
00:55:03,560 --> 00:55:05,280
Speaker 1: send me that I saw this and thought of your pesty,

1033
00:55:05,640 --> 00:55:08,279
Speaker 1: Like that's gonna be the way. But um, I can

1034
00:55:08,360 --> 00:55:10,960
Speaker 1: just because like if it's a girl's account, it's not

1035
00:55:11,040 --> 00:55:14,080
Speaker 1: going to be a dick in a wheelchair. And I

1036
00:55:14,120 --> 00:55:16,840
Speaker 1: don't mind dicks. Honestly. I think it's so hilarious that

1037
00:55:16,960 --> 00:55:19,080
Speaker 1: someone would do that and think that that might work

1038
00:55:19,200 --> 00:55:22,600
Speaker 1: for me or something like no woman just craves a

1039
00:55:22,800 --> 00:55:25,799
Speaker 1: random dick. It's such a weird thing that men are.

1040
00:55:25,880 --> 00:55:31,200
Speaker 1: Just that's where you go that man is um completely

1041
00:55:31,239 --> 00:55:34,320
Speaker 1: self centered and has no ability to have empathy, because

1042
00:55:35,200 --> 00:55:37,479
Speaker 1: if he had any idea how women think. He would

1043
00:55:37,560 --> 00:55:39,799
Speaker 1: know that we don't think like you do. He's thinking

1044
00:55:39,880 --> 00:55:41,960
Speaker 1: like he's thinking women think the same way. If a

1045
00:55:42,040 --> 00:55:44,839
Speaker 1: woman sent me a picture of her pussy, I would

1046
00:55:44,880 --> 00:55:47,520
Speaker 1: love it. So let me do this and she'll love it.

1047
00:55:47,640 --> 00:55:50,880
Speaker 1: That's a guy who doesn't know what consider that other

1048
00:55:50,920 --> 00:55:54,120
Speaker 1: people might have different desires. It's a bad sign. It's

1049
00:55:54,239 --> 00:55:57,000
Speaker 1: pretty funny when it's like, so I'm either gonna write

1050
00:55:57,040 --> 00:55:59,880
Speaker 1: like what you up to or send my dick. I

1051
00:56:00,160 --> 00:56:02,480
Speaker 1: it's one or the other. What am I gonna do?

1052
00:56:02,880 --> 00:56:05,359
Speaker 1: I mean there's like, I'm not an ap guy, I'm

1053
00:56:05,400 --> 00:56:10,000
Speaker 1: not an a but I'm Last night Chris came over

1054
00:56:10,120 --> 00:56:13,200
Speaker 1: and we were just like, yeah, the one with the

1055
00:56:13,239 --> 00:56:16,560
Speaker 1: cool eyebrow ring from years ago. Um, he stills a scar,

1056
00:56:16,680 --> 00:56:20,839
Speaker 1: not gonna get no big deal. Well, people think we're

1057
00:56:20,880 --> 00:56:23,440
Speaker 1: engaged because of the reality show. People really did not

1058
00:56:23,600 --> 00:56:25,600
Speaker 1: see that. They thought that when he got down on

1059
00:56:25,640 --> 00:56:27,919
Speaker 1: one name gave me a ring for some reason. Again,

1060
00:56:27,960 --> 00:56:30,319
Speaker 1: I didn't watch the finale. I watched it last night.

1061
00:56:30,800 --> 00:56:33,320
Speaker 1: Is there any is it confusing? Did they try to

1062
00:56:33,400 --> 00:56:35,480
Speaker 1: purposely make it look like we're getting engaged? I mean,

1063
00:56:35,520 --> 00:56:37,120
Speaker 1: he got on a knee and gave you a ring,

1064
00:56:37,400 --> 00:56:39,839
Speaker 1: but was there context like what the ring was about?

1065
00:56:39,880 --> 00:56:43,040
Speaker 1: Did he pull out like a fake ring? Because the

1066
00:56:43,239 --> 00:56:46,640
Speaker 1: ring that wasn't really discussed exactly. I saw the clip

1067
00:56:46,719 --> 00:56:49,759
Speaker 1: and I go, they tried to they didn't get the

1068
00:56:49,840 --> 00:56:51,920
Speaker 1: context of the ring, which is I believe it was

1069
00:56:51,960 --> 00:56:54,000
Speaker 1: a joke and we definitely were like, let's do a

1070
00:56:54,080 --> 00:56:56,880
Speaker 1: fake ring and no, it looked like you're holding like

1071
00:56:57,000 --> 00:56:59,600
Speaker 1: it looked gold. Yes, So I don't remember what it

1072
00:56:59,800 --> 00:57:01,520
Speaker 1: was specifically. I think I took it off my finger

1073
00:57:01,600 --> 00:57:03,359
Speaker 1: and was like, give it to me. It felt very

1074
00:57:03,480 --> 00:57:06,520
Speaker 1: much like a proposal that wasn't and it was like

1075
00:57:06,600 --> 00:57:09,080
Speaker 1: at the last second, go, which is all, that's a

1076
00:57:09,200 --> 00:57:11,640
Speaker 1: fucking prank, like that like on a girl that you've

1077
00:57:11,680 --> 00:57:14,520
Speaker 1: been dating for But no, no, you knew. But I'm saying,

1078
00:57:14,560 --> 00:57:16,880
Speaker 1: as a viewer watching it, like it it didn't come

1079
00:57:16,960 --> 00:57:20,640
Speaker 1: off like I knew yes and no, but not like

1080
00:57:21,560 --> 00:57:25,000
Speaker 1: it was a very clear crich context. I will never

1081
00:57:25,200 --> 00:57:27,760
Speaker 1: ever judge someone from a reality show ever again, because

1082
00:57:27,800 --> 00:57:31,280
Speaker 1: my mom is like Nikki getting all these calls about

1083
00:57:31,320 --> 00:57:33,200
Speaker 1: you and Chris. My friends have all these opinions and

1084
00:57:33,240 --> 00:57:35,880
Speaker 1: I go, they're based off of a show that does

1085
00:57:35,920 --> 00:57:38,600
Speaker 1: not show the truth. Like it's it's based off of

1086
00:57:38,960 --> 00:57:42,920
Speaker 1: little moments with no context. A lot of times. It

1087
00:57:42,960 --> 00:57:44,560
Speaker 1: doesn't mean it's not entertaining. It doesn't mean that you

1088
00:57:44,600 --> 00:57:47,680
Speaker 1: didn't see every moment was actually a real moment. But

1089
00:57:48,360 --> 00:57:51,400
Speaker 1: I don't need your unsolicited advice about my relationship based

1090
00:57:51,480 --> 00:57:53,959
Speaker 1: on two minutes of it you saw on a show.

1091
00:57:54,200 --> 00:57:57,400
Speaker 1: It's like getting unsolicited dick picks. And you're a reality show,

1092
00:57:57,480 --> 00:58:00,560
Speaker 1: Like that's a scripted show. People think my reality show

1093
00:58:00,720 --> 00:58:03,280
Speaker 1: like your reality So that guy was getting dick pigs

1094
00:58:03,280 --> 00:58:06,280
Speaker 1: from a scripted show because people think he's gay. People

1095
00:58:06,360 --> 00:58:10,120
Speaker 1: really think this is your life you're getting But it's

1096
00:58:10,160 --> 00:58:12,400
Speaker 1: just I just realized that so many times I form

1097
00:58:12,440 --> 00:58:15,000
Speaker 1: opinions about people from twenty two minutes of their live

1098
00:58:15,520 --> 00:58:18,200
Speaker 1: that I see, and I really do have strong opinions

1099
00:58:18,240 --> 00:58:20,800
Speaker 1: about you should pick him, you shouldn't pick up bachelor ate,

1100
00:58:20,920 --> 00:58:23,000
Speaker 1: or like oh, Page, why are you dating this guy

1101
00:58:23,040 --> 00:58:26,000
Speaker 1: at this summer house? Like I know? And the thing

1102
00:58:26,080 --> 00:58:28,560
Speaker 1: is you don't know. And it was so funny to

1103
00:58:28,600 --> 00:58:30,280
Speaker 1: hear my mom and tell me like all of her friends,

1104
00:58:30,280 --> 00:58:31,680
Speaker 1: and she was giving me advice like it was like

1105
00:58:31,760 --> 00:58:35,800
Speaker 1: real advice, Like, well, my friend Susan says you and Chris,

1106
00:58:36,040 --> 00:58:38,240
Speaker 1: I don't think it should work. And I go, are

1107
00:58:38,320 --> 00:58:40,680
Speaker 1: you presenting this to me? Like I should consider her

1108
00:58:40,800 --> 00:58:43,160
Speaker 1: advice based on what she saw of my life, Like

1109
00:58:43,280 --> 00:58:46,480
Speaker 1: I would never in a million years let this woman

1110
00:58:46,560 --> 00:58:49,000
Speaker 1: dictate any kind of it was just and she goes, well,

1111
00:58:49,160 --> 00:58:50,880
Speaker 1: three of my friends think you should stay together, and

1112
00:58:50,960 --> 00:58:52,880
Speaker 1: three think you should And I go, I don't need

1113
00:58:52,920 --> 00:58:55,840
Speaker 1: to hear any of this. This is your focus group.

1114
00:58:56,040 --> 00:58:57,960
Speaker 1: And my mom literally said that, and then she wrote me.

1115
00:58:58,240 --> 00:59:00,200
Speaker 1: She goes, I had three calls thinking you got in age,

1116
00:59:00,200 --> 00:59:02,760
Speaker 1: and I'm like that I knew that they made it

1117
00:59:02,840 --> 00:59:04,360
Speaker 1: look like that because they needed to make it look

1118
00:59:04,400 --> 00:59:06,360
Speaker 1: like something. But no, it was a fake proposal that

1119
00:59:07,520 --> 00:59:10,120
Speaker 1: I was in on it. I knew about it. Um,

1120
00:59:10,520 --> 00:59:13,600
Speaker 1: so yeah, what was I going to say about Max? Oh? Yeah,

1121
00:59:13,640 --> 00:59:15,040
Speaker 1: so last night when he came over, it was really

1122
00:59:15,080 --> 00:59:18,600
Speaker 1: fun because, um we were like, you know, just just

1123
00:59:18,840 --> 00:59:20,600
Speaker 1: can noodling on the couch, just kissing, and I was like,

1124
00:59:21,800 --> 00:59:23,800
Speaker 1: another man saw my vagina today. I just need to

1125
00:59:23,840 --> 00:59:25,720
Speaker 1: be honest with you about that. He kind of got

1126
00:59:25,800 --> 00:59:27,520
Speaker 1: like what and I was like, his name is Max,

1127
00:59:27,840 --> 00:59:33,880
Speaker 1: and for a student teacher is a bad student. Yeah,

1128
00:59:33,920 --> 00:59:36,720
Speaker 1: he works for ups, but it's also a bed. I

1129
00:59:36,720 --> 00:59:38,440
Speaker 1: could have given all the details and be like, what

1130
00:59:38,600 --> 00:59:41,040
Speaker 1: the fuck. So wait, so you said he was the

1131
00:59:41,080 --> 00:59:44,680
Speaker 1: third year medstate, which actually sounds like odd eligible bachelor. Yeah,

1132
00:59:44,680 --> 00:59:47,040
Speaker 1: and I was like, Max definitely saw I've done, and

1133
00:59:47,120 --> 00:59:48,280
Speaker 1: he was like, what do you mean. I was like,

1134
00:59:49,160 --> 00:59:51,440
Speaker 1: I thought it was a girl when I proved it.

1135
00:59:51,520 --> 00:59:53,400
Speaker 1: And then Max came in and I couldn't like not

1136
00:59:53,720 --> 00:59:56,720
Speaker 1: have like send him away, and he was like, it

1137
00:59:56,800 --> 00:59:59,520
Speaker 1: doesn't it doesn't make me feel any I was like, sorry,

1138
00:59:59,560 --> 01:00:01,480
Speaker 1: if that like killed the vibe, He goes, no, I

1139
01:00:01,600 --> 01:00:03,680
Speaker 1: just didn't do anything to the vibe. Like he was

1140
01:00:03,720 --> 01:00:05,400
Speaker 1: like he was unaffected by it, but it was I

1141
01:00:05,480 --> 01:00:06,760
Speaker 1: was just trying to be funny. He did think it

1142
01:00:06,800 --> 01:00:08,720
Speaker 1: was funny, though. Okay, let's go to writing. It would

1143
01:00:08,720 --> 01:00:11,320
Speaker 1: be funny if you're like and I let Max because

1144
01:00:11,560 --> 01:00:16,920
Speaker 1: he was so hot. Yeah, but then I let him

1145
01:00:16,960 --> 01:00:30,800
Speaker 1: stay because we just had a vibe. Alright, alrighty, let's

1146
01:00:30,840 --> 01:00:34,600
Speaker 1: get to it. Okay. So this was from the subreddit weird.

1147
01:00:34,840 --> 01:00:38,320
Speaker 1: It says my husband, she's thirty six, he's forty one,

1148
01:00:38,560 --> 01:00:41,480
Speaker 1: has some disturbing request for after he's passed away. This

1149
01:00:41,560 --> 01:00:43,360
Speaker 1: one is really bizarre and I'm sorry ahead of time.

1150
01:00:43,400 --> 01:00:45,920
Speaker 1: My husband of twelve years has sub medical problems. Recently,

1151
01:00:46,120 --> 01:00:47,960
Speaker 1: the topic about end of life plans came up and

1152
01:00:48,000 --> 01:00:50,120
Speaker 1: I asked if he wanted to be buried. He didn't

1153
01:00:50,160 --> 01:00:52,160
Speaker 1: want that, nor did he want to be cremated. My

1154
01:00:52,280 --> 01:00:54,800
Speaker 1: husband wants me to have his skull taken from his box,

1155
01:00:56,200 --> 01:00:58,560
Speaker 1: his skull taken from his body and cleaned. Then he

1156
01:00:58,640 --> 01:01:00,320
Speaker 1: wants the skull put on a man a piece in

1157
01:01:00,360 --> 01:01:02,200
Speaker 1: the living room. The rest of his body he wants

1158
01:01:02,240 --> 01:01:04,040
Speaker 1: sent to one of those places that makes the gems

1159
01:01:04,080 --> 01:01:06,560
Speaker 1: out of bodies. I didn't know those places exist and

1160
01:01:06,680 --> 01:01:09,320
Speaker 1: made into two blue diamonds. He then wants those gems

1161
01:01:09,360 --> 01:01:10,840
Speaker 1: to be put in the eye sockets of the skull

1162
01:01:10,880 --> 01:01:13,440
Speaker 1: to look like eyes. Then he can quote watch the

1163
01:01:13,520 --> 01:01:16,920
Speaker 1: family home and be quote be passed down through the generations.

1164
01:01:17,360 --> 01:01:21,120
Speaker 1: I love it. That's so thoughtful. I like it. It's

1165
01:01:21,120 --> 01:01:24,920
Speaker 1: a little bit creepy, but I totally believe in. I

1166
01:01:25,000 --> 01:01:28,520
Speaker 1: would love to have my skull be passed through instead

1167
01:01:28,560 --> 01:01:30,200
Speaker 1: of some urn with my ashes and be like, this

1168
01:01:30,280 --> 01:01:33,720
Speaker 1: is Grandma's skull. That is so cool. Yeah, I can

1169
01:01:33,800 --> 01:01:35,880
Speaker 1: see that. I can see you having a nice skull

1170
01:01:35,960 --> 01:01:37,640
Speaker 1: on the wall. We put animals on it, We put

1171
01:01:37,720 --> 01:01:39,680
Speaker 1: everything on the wall. I want to get a marian.

1172
01:01:39,840 --> 01:01:41,720
Speaker 1: Why don't we stuff you and throw you on the wall.

1173
01:01:42,480 --> 01:01:44,920
Speaker 1: I'll put you in my living room if you do

1174
01:01:45,000 --> 01:01:48,280
Speaker 1: my skull. Would you take my skull? I want your

1175
01:01:48,280 --> 01:01:51,520
Speaker 1: whole face. I want to stuff it already looked stuffed

1176
01:01:51,560 --> 01:01:55,280
Speaker 1: because what if it It would look like me in

1177
01:01:55,320 --> 01:01:59,400
Speaker 1: the morning. I know it because you know, my head

1178
01:01:59,440 --> 01:02:01,200
Speaker 1: would be in a are in a formale him and

1179
01:02:01,200 --> 01:02:02,800
Speaker 1: it will be kind of puffy like I just woke up.

1180
01:02:02,800 --> 01:02:04,960
Speaker 1: It would have like an imprint of the eyemask I

1181
01:02:05,080 --> 01:02:09,560
Speaker 1: was wearing. Okay, this is that's Oh my god, my

1182
01:02:09,600 --> 01:02:12,720
Speaker 1: gut teachers here, Okay, no, no, no, but I was

1183
01:02:12,760 --> 01:02:15,919
Speaker 1: just interrupting a good joke. Again, Ham drip, double double,

1184
01:02:15,960 --> 01:02:20,640
Speaker 1: ham drip. Okay. So this is from ask men. And

1185
01:02:20,680 --> 01:02:22,400
Speaker 1: the question is if you could change one thing about

1186
01:02:22,400 --> 01:02:24,720
Speaker 1: your penis, what would it be? And I thought, oh,

1187
01:02:24,760 --> 01:02:28,840
Speaker 1: it's gonna be size. Someone said it's a rex status

1188
01:02:28,880 --> 01:02:32,320
Speaker 1: would be a percent under my conscious control. Remove the

1189
01:02:32,360 --> 01:02:36,160
Speaker 1: scars and the coarse bar corresponding scar tissue. Um that

1190
01:02:36,240 --> 01:02:39,040
Speaker 1: makes ten speed vibration. Someone said, that's a good one.

1191
01:02:40,240 --> 01:02:41,720
Speaker 1: I wanted to be able to shoot out a laser

1192
01:02:41,760 --> 01:02:44,040
Speaker 1: capable of cutting steel. It should be controllable and not

1193
01:02:44,240 --> 01:02:46,920
Speaker 1: like Syde Collops from The X Men. No ball hair?

1194
01:02:47,040 --> 01:02:49,400
Speaker 1: Why so many? I have not seen this much before. Edit.

1195
01:02:49,800 --> 01:02:51,960
Speaker 1: Holy fucking hell, this is like double hours. I don't

1196
01:02:51,960 --> 01:02:54,240
Speaker 1: know what that said. Okay, so someone said no ball hair.

1197
01:02:54,480 --> 01:02:56,440
Speaker 1: I mean someone said, I'm fifty one. I wish it

1198
01:02:56,480 --> 01:03:00,040
Speaker 1: worked like I did when I was fourteen? Yeah, what

1199
01:03:00,080 --> 01:03:02,160
Speaker 1: would you change about your You would add like a

1200
01:03:02,200 --> 01:03:05,040
Speaker 1: half an inch, you said, I mean, if we're gaining,

1201
01:03:05,080 --> 01:03:08,800
Speaker 1: add whatever we want, add whatever you want. Yeah, I

1202
01:03:08,880 --> 01:03:10,480
Speaker 1: mean I'm not going to make my dick be able

1203
01:03:10,520 --> 01:03:15,880
Speaker 1: to fly. That'd be pretty cool, though frequent like, uh,

1204
01:03:16,280 --> 01:03:20,520
Speaker 1: let him? Do you know sometimes it's annoying to have

1205
01:03:20,560 --> 01:03:25,200
Speaker 1: a dick all the time removable removable? Yeah? I always

1206
01:03:25,280 --> 01:03:29,439
Speaker 1: kind of wan. I used to be. Can I take

1207
01:03:29,480 --> 01:03:32,880
Speaker 1: the skull of your dick? I'll just yeah, I'll take

1208
01:03:32,920 --> 01:03:36,720
Speaker 1: one of the Oh my god, any if I kept

1209
01:03:37,280 --> 01:03:40,840
Speaker 1: what if you really did pass down your penis informal

1210
01:03:40,920 --> 01:03:43,600
Speaker 1: Bee Hyde, I would hope you'd keep it. I would

1211
01:03:43,680 --> 01:03:45,440
Speaker 1: not want that what I did used to want when

1212
01:03:45,480 --> 01:03:47,400
Speaker 1: I used to be kind of like more of an

1213
01:03:47,600 --> 01:03:51,080
Speaker 1: adventurous horror and not even adventurous hor You know how

1214
01:03:51,120 --> 01:03:54,200
Speaker 1: girls do molds of their boyfriend's penises make a toy

1215
01:03:54,240 --> 01:03:58,080
Speaker 1: of it. I wanted a stuffed animal of my boyfriend's

1216
01:03:58,080 --> 01:04:00,120
Speaker 1: penis because I just wanted to take it on the

1217
01:04:00,200 --> 01:04:01,640
Speaker 1: road and like cuddle with it and like have it

1218
01:04:01,800 --> 01:04:04,400
Speaker 1: look the same. I think there's some there's something to

1219
01:04:04,440 --> 01:04:06,800
Speaker 1: be There's an industry for that, you know what. I

1220
01:04:06,840 --> 01:04:08,920
Speaker 1: think could be a great industry. You make it a train,

1221
01:04:09,600 --> 01:04:12,840
Speaker 1: but you don't say it's his dick. I'd love a train. Yeah,

1222
01:04:13,400 --> 01:04:17,000
Speaker 1: good tar No, but no, but like make don't make

1223
01:04:17,040 --> 01:04:19,000
Speaker 1: it so obvious it's a dick, but you know it's

1224
01:04:19,040 --> 01:04:21,520
Speaker 1: as dick. Yeah, you know what I mean. Okay, but

1225
01:04:21,560 --> 01:04:23,080
Speaker 1: I wanted to be the same color and like, but

1226
01:04:23,120 --> 01:04:26,760
Speaker 1: I wanted to have like a smiley face. All right, Okay.

1227
01:04:27,080 --> 01:04:29,120
Speaker 1: So this is from white people Twitter, and it's just

1228
01:04:29,200 --> 01:04:32,000
Speaker 1: a tweet from a girl named Meg Monroe, and it says,

1229
01:04:32,080 --> 01:04:34,040
Speaker 1: imagine if a woman had to orgasm in order to

1230
01:04:34,080 --> 01:04:36,240
Speaker 1: get pregnant by a man, there would be like eleven

1231
01:04:36,320 --> 01:04:43,560
Speaker 1: people in the world. Wait, wait, woman had a woman

1232
01:04:44,520 --> 01:04:46,400
Speaker 1: just to say that there would be eleven people, it's

1233
01:04:46,440 --> 01:04:50,120
Speaker 1: such a funny. No, it really made me um l

1234
01:04:50,160 --> 01:04:52,840
Speaker 1: o l. And then this is from No Stupid Questions.

1235
01:04:53,320 --> 01:04:57,320
Speaker 1: It's also was reposted in the subreddit Suspiciously Specific, which

1236
01:04:57,320 --> 01:05:02,080
Speaker 1: is one of my favorite subreds. Final thought. So she said,

1237
01:05:02,200 --> 01:05:06,280
Speaker 1: they say can come accumulate in the sink drain. Let's

1238
01:05:06,280 --> 01:05:09,000
Speaker 1: say hypothetically someone in our household came into the sink

1239
01:05:09,040 --> 01:05:11,160
Speaker 1: every day for the past two months. Would the come

1240
01:05:11,280 --> 01:05:14,200
Speaker 1: gather up in the bottom somewhere. Let's also say hypothetically

1241
01:05:14,320 --> 01:05:16,760
Speaker 1: some workers were to perform maintenance on the sink, would

1242
01:05:16,800 --> 01:05:23,800
Speaker 1: they suspect anything? I just love it keep going? Is

1243
01:05:23,880 --> 01:05:29,480
Speaker 1: it love hypothetical? When it's about you? And I think

1244
01:05:29,520 --> 01:05:33,040
Speaker 1: it would. It would definitely clog up, you think. So, Yeah,

1245
01:05:33,040 --> 01:05:35,600
Speaker 1: have you ever coming a jacuzzi? A guy coming in jacuzzi?

1246
01:05:35,680 --> 01:05:38,320
Speaker 1: It doesn't go anywhere. It just turns into like, no,

1247
01:05:39,120 --> 01:05:43,560
Speaker 1: like you came into jacuzzi? Who hasn't, I think most

1248
01:05:43,600 --> 01:05:46,760
Speaker 1: of our listeners or a bathtub, Well, I've never. I

1249
01:05:46,840 --> 01:05:49,640
Speaker 1: don't have come like men. Yeah, well I've come in

1250
01:05:49,680 --> 01:05:53,480
Speaker 1: a bathtub and it just it just coagulated island. Yeah,

1251
01:05:53,480 --> 01:05:56,840
Speaker 1: it turns into those like dinosaur things. Okay, here's a

1252
01:05:56,880 --> 01:05:59,280
Speaker 1: funny response. People on Reddit are so fucking funny, like

1253
01:05:59,720 --> 01:06:03,880
Speaker 1: usually the top response. That's Daniel Burson from the Alabama

1254
01:06:04,000 --> 01:06:06,880
Speaker 1: Boys episode. He's a huge bestie now and he's getting

1255
01:06:06,920 --> 01:06:09,680
Speaker 1: into Reddit because of my obsession with Reddit, and he

1256
01:06:09,800 --> 01:06:10,880
Speaker 1: was like, do I need to just do it? And

1257
01:06:10,880 --> 01:06:13,360
Speaker 1: I'm like, yes, it's it's the funniest people commenting on

1258
01:06:13,400 --> 01:06:15,600
Speaker 1: the funniest stuff, because all the top comments are like

1259
01:06:15,680 --> 01:06:18,200
Speaker 1: the funniest ones. And someone said it's better to come

1260
01:06:18,240 --> 01:06:22,360
Speaker 1: in the sink than to sink in the come. Okay,

1261
01:06:22,440 --> 01:06:26,960
Speaker 1: so um, And today I am obsessed with Jeff Goldbloom

1262
01:06:27,040 --> 01:06:30,280
Speaker 1: right now, obsessed love him so much. Never really was

1263
01:06:30,360 --> 01:06:33,200
Speaker 1: like a huge fan. Taylor from the podcast last week

1264
01:06:33,320 --> 01:06:36,360
Speaker 1: or yeah, um for two weeks, the Taylor of the Thief,

1265
01:06:36,440 --> 01:06:40,120
Speaker 1: the Hobo Thief. She was always in love with Jeff Goldboom,

1266
01:06:40,200 --> 01:06:42,720
Speaker 1: like in love with him in high school and I

1267
01:06:42,800 --> 01:06:45,880
Speaker 1: never understood it. But he is on Conan uh Conan

1268
01:06:46,120 --> 01:06:49,240
Speaker 1: O'Brien needs a Friend podcast last week and it is

1269
01:06:49,360 --> 01:06:52,320
Speaker 1: such a he is so endearing, he's so lovely and

1270
01:06:52,400 --> 01:06:54,800
Speaker 1: so this is a tweet from Chris Kelly, who was

1271
01:06:54,840 --> 01:06:57,960
Speaker 1: actually on our show. No uh um, you up. He

1272
01:06:58,120 --> 01:07:03,040
Speaker 1: was promoting, Um, what's the show where that that little

1273
01:07:03,080 --> 01:07:06,040
Speaker 1: boy becomes a star and his his two siblings are

1274
01:07:06,080 --> 01:07:08,680
Speaker 1: like less famous and it's on I think it's on

1275
01:07:08,840 --> 01:07:14,360
Speaker 1: Hbox now. Boys. Two people from S and L wrote

1276
01:07:14,440 --> 01:07:16,720
Speaker 1: this show about in Molly Shannon plays the boy's mom

1277
01:07:16,760 --> 01:07:19,240
Speaker 1: and his name is Chase Dreams. On the show, Oh,

1278
01:07:19,360 --> 01:07:21,200
Speaker 1: the other two, it's called the Other two, the other

1279
01:07:21,240 --> 01:07:24,200
Speaker 1: two because it's the other two siblings. So anyway, this

1280
01:07:24,280 --> 01:07:26,360
Speaker 1: is Chris Kelly. This is his Twitter. This is from him,

1281
01:07:26,560 --> 01:07:28,560
Speaker 1: and this is from the subreddit made me smile, and

1282
01:07:28,640 --> 01:07:30,840
Speaker 1: it says someone once introduced Jeff gold Bloom to me

1283
01:07:30,880 --> 01:07:33,200
Speaker 1: at a party by saying, this is Chris Kelly, and

1284
01:07:33,280 --> 01:07:36,400
Speaker 1: he exclaimed, oh, my God. Of course I couldn't believe it.

1285
01:07:36,520 --> 01:07:39,120
Speaker 1: He knew who I was. Then he proceeded to say,

1286
01:07:39,280 --> 01:07:41,520
Speaker 1: my god, of course to every person that he was

1287
01:07:41,560 --> 01:07:44,640
Speaker 1: introduced to. I love Jeff Goldbloom. That made me happy

1288
01:07:44,680 --> 01:07:47,200
Speaker 1: because Jeff isn't one of these Hollywood people being like

1289
01:07:47,480 --> 01:07:51,320
Speaker 1: nice to see you, which, if you don't know in Hollywood,

1290
01:07:51,360 --> 01:07:54,200
Speaker 1: New York or in show business, it is a well

1291
01:07:54,360 --> 01:07:57,800
Speaker 1: known thing that instead of saying nice to meet you,

1292
01:07:58,000 --> 01:07:59,880
Speaker 1: you say nice to see you, because it affords you

1293
01:08:00,000 --> 01:08:02,760
Speaker 1: you the ability that maybe you've met this person before

1294
01:08:02,800 --> 01:08:04,400
Speaker 1: and you can get away saying nice to see you.

1295
01:08:05,040 --> 01:08:06,480
Speaker 1: And so when someone says nice to see you, it

1296
01:08:06,560 --> 01:08:08,240
Speaker 1: usually means I don't know who you are, and I

1297
01:08:08,320 --> 01:08:10,400
Speaker 1: may have met you before, but I'm too scared to

1298
01:08:10,440 --> 01:08:14,160
Speaker 1: say I always say nice to meet you, and because

1299
01:08:14,280 --> 01:08:16,600
Speaker 1: I don't. And I did this to Larry David. I

1300
01:08:16,640 --> 01:08:18,639
Speaker 1: said nice to meet you once, even though we've met before,

1301
01:08:19,120 --> 01:08:21,760
Speaker 1: and he goes, we've met before, and I was humiliated

1302
01:08:21,760 --> 01:08:23,560
Speaker 1: because I was like, I assumed you wouldn't remember, and

1303
01:08:23,600 --> 01:08:24,920
Speaker 1: I didn't want to do the nice to see you

1304
01:08:25,080 --> 01:08:27,360
Speaker 1: think to make you feel weird. I also did this

1305
01:08:27,439 --> 01:08:29,560
Speaker 1: to Nic Offerman. I said nice to meet you, and

1306
01:08:29,640 --> 01:08:31,560
Speaker 1: he was like, I did your show once, and I

1307
01:08:31,640 --> 01:08:33,880
Speaker 1: was like, I didn't expect you to remember me. I

1308
01:08:33,920 --> 01:08:38,320
Speaker 1: don't know what it's not like you could say, I

1309
01:08:38,360 --> 01:08:40,519
Speaker 1: think Jeff Goldwum doesn't go that route, and he just goes,

1310
01:08:40,720 --> 01:08:44,280
Speaker 1: my God, of course, And that's not insincere, you know,

1311
01:08:44,439 --> 01:08:48,960
Speaker 1: it's not insincere. He's just saying my God of course, sarcastic. No,

1312
01:08:49,600 --> 01:08:53,080
Speaker 1: if you listen to him on coming a love bug,

1313
01:08:53,680 --> 01:08:56,920
Speaker 1: my God. Of course it does sound like Serelena, my

1314
01:08:57,040 --> 01:09:02,519
Speaker 1: good friend. Um, and then I saved a okay, and

1315
01:09:02,560 --> 01:09:05,280
Speaker 1: then I guess that's that's all we have for today. Um,

1316
01:09:06,040 --> 01:09:08,639
Speaker 1: where did bed bugs live before bed bugs were invented?

1317
01:09:08,840 --> 01:09:11,519
Speaker 1: Someone just obviously wrote a funny joke they weren't invented.

1318
01:09:11,560 --> 01:09:14,040
Speaker 1: It's called no Stupid Questions, where they said, apparently they

1319
01:09:14,160 --> 01:09:17,040
Speaker 1: fed on bats and birds before humans, but they predate

1320
01:09:17,080 --> 01:09:19,320
Speaker 1: bats by thirty million years, so there must have been

1321
01:09:19,320 --> 01:09:22,679
Speaker 1: another mysterious host who went extinct or something that leads

1322
01:09:22,760 --> 01:09:25,040
Speaker 1: me to a joke I made in Phoenix. When I

1323
01:09:25,160 --> 01:09:26,960
Speaker 1: was about to go on stage in Phoenix, I looked

1324
01:09:27,040 --> 01:09:29,240
Speaker 1: up some interesting facts and one of them was that

1325
01:09:29,320 --> 01:09:34,040
Speaker 1: Phoenix UM was founded on a wait wait I funk.

1326
01:09:34,080 --> 01:09:38,519
Speaker 1: I wrote it down. What Phoenix is A is a

1327
01:09:38,720 --> 01:09:47,080
Speaker 1: dry archaic uh, shallow bed of like in infertile ground

1328
01:09:47,200 --> 01:09:48,720
Speaker 1: or something. And I was like, oh, like the way

1329
01:09:48,760 --> 01:09:51,080
Speaker 1: it was described, it sounded exactly like my Uterus. And

1330
01:09:51,080 --> 01:09:52,240
Speaker 1: I said something like that's what I heard in my

1331
01:09:52,280 --> 01:09:54,680
Speaker 1: pap smear. I gotta laugh. Then I said, Phoenix is

1332
01:09:54,680 --> 01:09:57,760
Speaker 1: a hundred and eighty billion years old the ground that

1333
01:09:57,840 --> 01:10:01,040
Speaker 1: we are on. I think that's when um Alice Cooper

1334
01:10:01,120 --> 01:10:04,080
Speaker 1: moved here. That was a joke that Noah gave because

1335
01:10:04,080 --> 01:10:07,320
Speaker 1: Alice Cooper is someone who is famous that lives in

1336
01:10:07,520 --> 01:10:09,800
Speaker 1: Phoenix and he wasn't born there, but I had to

1337
01:10:09,840 --> 01:10:12,320
Speaker 1: make a joke about him living there because everyone he

1338
01:10:12,360 --> 01:10:13,640
Speaker 1: lives there. I didn't know that. I would have not

1339
01:10:13,760 --> 01:10:15,400
Speaker 1: known that in my interesting facts that I looked up,

1340
01:10:15,400 --> 01:10:17,080
Speaker 1: it wasn't in there. But the Noah backstage was like,

1341
01:10:17,160 --> 01:10:19,360
Speaker 1: I think Alice Cooper lives here. She didn't even say think.

1342
01:10:19,479 --> 01:10:21,479
Speaker 1: She's just that Alice Cooper lives here and he's musted

1343
01:10:21,560 --> 01:10:22,800
Speaker 1: a lot of money and blah bah blah. And I

1344
01:10:22,840 --> 01:10:24,400
Speaker 1: looked it up and it was true. So I made

1345
01:10:24,400 --> 01:10:31,280
Speaker 1: a joke and it was good. Bed Bugs, bugs come on,

1346
01:10:32,160 --> 01:10:36,040
Speaker 1: bed bugs. They call him the house thugs. I've never

1347
01:10:36,200 --> 01:10:39,000
Speaker 1: met one because I'm no slug. I'm always moving fast.

1348
01:10:39,320 --> 01:10:42,439
Speaker 1: My dick gets attached, but it never is. Wait a second,

1349
01:10:43,160 --> 01:10:45,200
Speaker 1: you've never met one. Do you remember the time that

1350
01:10:45,280 --> 01:10:49,960
Speaker 1: you called me? It was the scaredest I know? But

1351
01:10:50,080 --> 01:10:53,920
Speaker 1: this the best season. Need to hear how adorable Andrew

1352
01:10:54,080 --> 01:10:55,760
Speaker 1: thought he got bed bugs and give it. Gave it

1353
01:10:55,840 --> 01:10:59,400
Speaker 1: to me because he was staying at my place this

1354
01:10:59,560 --> 01:11:02,519
Speaker 1: is in her allude to the RAF A little scary.

1355
01:11:02,800 --> 01:11:05,519
Speaker 1: I'm just going underneath. Is it still going? Yeah, okay,

1356
01:11:05,560 --> 01:11:09,960
Speaker 1: I'm wrapping so Andrew. So one time, Andrew, No, we

1357
01:11:10,040 --> 01:11:12,800
Speaker 1: had a bed bug my my, My roommate Jen had

1358
01:11:12,840 --> 01:11:17,000
Speaker 1: a bed bug scare. We got a dog. He came in.

1359
01:11:17,200 --> 01:11:18,880
Speaker 1: He said there were no bed bugs here. I don't

1360
01:11:18,920 --> 01:11:21,800
Speaker 1: even know if this was that was legit. Then we

1361
01:11:21,880 --> 01:11:24,960
Speaker 1: got another mascot. So I was scared. But my room

1362
01:11:25,080 --> 01:11:27,280
Speaker 1: was far away from her, so I was very nervous.

1363
01:11:27,320 --> 01:11:29,880
Speaker 1: I was watching your dogs for maybe like the second

1364
01:11:29,960 --> 01:11:32,040
Speaker 1: time I've ever met, and we were new friends, but

1365
01:11:32,120 --> 01:11:34,880
Speaker 1: we were already like close, and he called me up

1366
01:11:35,120 --> 01:11:38,360
Speaker 1: like man, so scared. I mean, Andrew gets scared to

1367
01:11:38,360 --> 01:11:40,280
Speaker 1: ask me if he can leave early from a venue

1368
01:11:40,320 --> 01:11:42,280
Speaker 1: to go back to the hotel. Like there's you can

1369
01:11:42,320 --> 01:11:44,080
Speaker 1: tell there's been like a lot of thought before he

1370
01:11:44,240 --> 01:11:47,800
Speaker 1: like gets the courage to be like, um, so uh,

1371
01:11:48,160 --> 01:11:50,839
Speaker 1: based on this all, He's like presenting a five paragraph

1372
01:11:50,920 --> 01:11:52,720
Speaker 1: essay of like can I just leave? And I'm like, yes,

1373
01:11:52,800 --> 01:11:54,920
Speaker 1: you could go. But Andrew gets scared of me because

1374
01:11:54,920 --> 01:11:57,720
Speaker 1: I'm a scary person and you love a hang and

1375
01:11:57,800 --> 01:11:59,320
Speaker 1: I love a hang and he's taking that from me

1376
01:11:59,400 --> 01:12:01,840
Speaker 1: and we know that so luckily no was there to

1377
01:12:01,880 --> 01:12:04,280
Speaker 1: fill in. But do that that's why I was able

1378
01:12:04,320 --> 01:12:07,800
Speaker 1: to leave. Well, okay, it wasn't why you were able

1379
01:12:07,800 --> 01:12:09,880
Speaker 1: to leave. I would have let you leave anyway, but um,

1380
01:12:09,960 --> 01:12:12,320
Speaker 1: you're right, that was nice to consider. But he was

1381
01:12:12,360 --> 01:12:14,880
Speaker 1: so scared to tell me, and he called me and

1382
01:12:15,080 --> 01:12:18,120
Speaker 1: was like I thought you were going to say I

1383
01:12:18,760 --> 01:12:22,720
Speaker 1: fucked your dog or like I well that was the

1384
01:12:22,800 --> 01:12:25,360
Speaker 1: third one. Ye, yeah, this was just the second week.

1385
01:12:25,479 --> 01:12:28,120
Speaker 1: But you were just getting me ready. But you told

1386
01:12:28,160 --> 01:12:31,200
Speaker 1: me about the bed bugs. Um. And sometimes it's weird.

1387
01:12:31,640 --> 01:12:34,639
Speaker 1: Nikki Glazer can overreact about having the word goddamn taken

1388
01:12:34,680 --> 01:12:37,599
Speaker 1: out of a trailer, but sometimes I get my phone

1389
01:12:37,600 --> 01:12:39,400
Speaker 1: stolen out of my hand or someone tells me I

1390
01:12:39,479 --> 01:12:44,759
Speaker 1: might have bed bugs and my reaction is like like negative,

1391
01:12:45,160 --> 01:12:48,519
Speaker 1: Like it's almost like I'm in a meditative state and

1392
01:12:48,560 --> 01:12:53,639
Speaker 1: I'm just like, okay, it's like bed bugs said bed bugs?

1393
01:12:53,880 --> 01:12:56,840
Speaker 1: Yeah I thought because people in New York I thought

1394
01:12:56,840 --> 01:12:58,800
Speaker 1: you said dad bugs bunny and it was like one

1395
01:12:58,840 --> 01:13:00,439
Speaker 1: of those bugs bunnies with an to to it on

1396
01:13:00,479 --> 01:13:04,559
Speaker 1: a T shirt. Yeah, like you know, when like people,

1397
01:13:04,880 --> 01:13:07,080
Speaker 1: how did you get COVID. Who gave you COVID? That's

1398
01:13:07,080 --> 01:13:09,519
Speaker 1: what bed bugs was before COVID in New York City.

1399
01:13:09,560 --> 01:13:12,519
Speaker 1: You know what, for some reason, I think that these

1400
01:13:12,640 --> 01:13:14,920
Speaker 1: things that are catastrophic to other people, getting your phone

1401
01:13:14,920 --> 01:13:16,280
Speaker 1: stone out of your hand by a twelve year old

1402
01:13:16,280 --> 01:13:19,400
Speaker 1: sprinting away, or getting bed bugs or getting COVID, I

1403
01:13:19,560 --> 01:13:23,080
Speaker 1: already know so much of like the guilt that or

1404
01:13:23,160 --> 01:13:26,880
Speaker 1: the like all the stuff that's gonna it's I only

1405
01:13:26,920 --> 01:13:29,280
Speaker 1: get sideswiped by things that are unexpected. And I think

1406
01:13:29,360 --> 01:13:31,479
Speaker 1: the things that are expected and talked about, and especially

1407
01:13:31,520 --> 01:13:35,400
Speaker 1: the ones that carry so much guilt for no reason,

1408
01:13:36,040 --> 01:13:38,200
Speaker 1: like you didn't want bed bugs. No one wants to

1409
01:13:38,280 --> 01:13:41,639
Speaker 1: get COVID. No one wants to give COVID to someone

1410
01:13:41,760 --> 01:13:44,160
Speaker 1: like I just want to immediately take that away from

1411
01:13:44,200 --> 01:13:46,840
Speaker 1: them because I you know, I had I had a

1412
01:13:46,960 --> 01:13:48,960
Speaker 1: guy once that I was dating look through my phone

1413
01:13:49,360 --> 01:13:51,439
Speaker 1: when I was not there because he didn't trust me

1414
01:13:51,479 --> 01:13:56,240
Speaker 1: about something. And I when I caught him, I was,

1415
01:13:57,280 --> 01:13:59,720
Speaker 1: I caught him, and I was like my first thought

1416
01:13:59,800 --> 01:14:01,360
Speaker 1: and I hope that people do this sometimes and I

1417
01:14:01,400 --> 01:14:03,280
Speaker 1: need to do a better job of it was if

1418
01:14:03,400 --> 01:14:05,720
Speaker 1: I did this and got caught how would I want

1419
01:14:05,760 --> 01:14:09,720
Speaker 1: that person to treat me because this person didn't is

1420
01:14:09,760 --> 01:14:12,080
Speaker 1: not a bad person. They were feeling insecure. They didn't

1421
01:14:12,080 --> 01:14:13,519
Speaker 1: want to look through my phone. No one wants to

1422
01:14:13,600 --> 01:14:16,759
Speaker 1: do that. Yeah, we were like they were like dating

1423
01:14:16,840 --> 01:14:19,559
Speaker 1: and they were just not trusting me. And they were

1424
01:14:19,640 --> 01:14:21,960
Speaker 1: someone that you know, I would have never thought would

1425
01:14:21,960 --> 01:14:23,960
Speaker 1: look through my phone ever in a million years, Like

1426
01:14:24,160 --> 01:14:29,200
Speaker 1: really I was. I had left my phone to go,

1427
01:14:30,040 --> 01:14:32,599
Speaker 1: uh do something at like on a table that they

1428
01:14:32,640 --> 01:14:34,200
Speaker 1: were at, and then I came back and there was

1429
01:14:34,240 --> 01:14:37,080
Speaker 1: a text message up to a conversation between me and

1430
01:14:37,120 --> 01:14:38,840
Speaker 1: a guy that I knew. This guy suspected me of

1431
01:14:39,200 --> 01:14:41,920
Speaker 1: hooking up with and the truth was that guy I

1432
01:14:41,960 --> 01:14:43,439
Speaker 1: hadn't talked to him in like a year, and so

1433
01:14:43,800 --> 01:14:46,240
Speaker 1: what he And then somehow this phone went off. But

1434
01:14:46,479 --> 01:14:48,960
Speaker 1: whenever I walked, my alarm went off. That's what happened.

1435
01:14:48,960 --> 01:14:51,080
Speaker 1: He was shot shutting off my alarm. And so it was.

1436
01:14:51,400 --> 01:14:53,040
Speaker 1: And I remember being my walk being like I wonder

1437
01:14:53,080 --> 01:14:55,200
Speaker 1: if this person would ever go through my phone because

1438
01:14:55,200 --> 01:14:56,800
Speaker 1: I left it and then I got back and I

1439
01:14:56,880 --> 01:15:00,280
Speaker 1: saw it and I confronted him when I go, hey,

1440
01:15:01,080 --> 01:15:02,519
Speaker 1: I have not talked to this person in a year,

1441
01:15:02,560 --> 01:15:04,439
Speaker 1: and the text message was up, did you go through

1442
01:15:04,479 --> 01:15:06,200
Speaker 1: my phone? And he immediately admitted to it, and he

1443
01:15:06,320 --> 01:15:10,439
Speaker 1: was so guilty, so embarrassed, and which I knew I

1444
01:15:10,479 --> 01:15:12,360
Speaker 1: would be too if I got caught. And I'm absolutely

1445
01:15:12,400 --> 01:15:14,559
Speaker 1: capable of doing something like this in a moment where

1446
01:15:14,560 --> 01:15:18,360
Speaker 1: I'm feeling insecure or whatever, and I just I remember

1447
01:15:18,400 --> 01:15:20,280
Speaker 1: he had to go do some like go to work

1448
01:15:20,320 --> 01:15:21,800
Speaker 1: and do something like that was going to take a

1449
01:15:21,880 --> 01:15:24,040
Speaker 1: lot of focus, and he was stressed out that I

1450
01:15:24,120 --> 01:15:25,640
Speaker 1: was going to break up with him or whatever, and

1451
01:15:26,200 --> 01:15:28,519
Speaker 1: that that I hadn't decided yet based on what would

1452
01:15:28,520 --> 01:15:32,080
Speaker 1: it would be. But I remember saying to him, nothing

1453
01:15:32,160 --> 01:15:34,439
Speaker 1: you're gonna think about it work today will change the

1454
01:15:34,560 --> 01:15:40,439
Speaker 1: result of what happened. I I don't don't worry about this.

1455
01:15:41,120 --> 01:15:43,200
Speaker 1: We're gonna be okay, which is true, whether we wake

1456
01:15:43,280 --> 01:15:45,040
Speaker 1: up or not, We're gonna be okay. We're gonna get

1457
01:15:45,080 --> 01:15:48,360
Speaker 1: through this. I am not I want to talk about

1458
01:15:48,400 --> 01:15:51,320
Speaker 1: it later. I'm not mad at you. I'm a little disappointed,

1459
01:15:51,400 --> 01:15:55,120
Speaker 1: but I understand why this happened. Please go to work

1460
01:15:55,240 --> 01:15:58,120
Speaker 1: and do not be don't let this go. Because he

1461
01:15:58,200 --> 01:15:59,960
Speaker 1: was worried about something at work that day and I'm like, please,

1462
01:16:00,080 --> 01:16:02,880
Speaker 1: don't let this affect your audition because of this, like

1463
01:16:03,200 --> 01:16:05,479
Speaker 1: put it into that, you know. And I just remember

1464
01:16:05,800 --> 01:16:08,519
Speaker 1: feeling really good about that because I was like, hopefully

1465
01:16:08,600 --> 01:16:11,000
Speaker 1: someone will bestow this on me when I do something

1466
01:16:11,080 --> 01:16:13,599
Speaker 1: like check someone's phone, you know, something that I get

1467
01:16:13,640 --> 01:16:17,240
Speaker 1: caught doing that is so embarrassing because even though I

1468
01:16:17,360 --> 01:16:20,040
Speaker 1: have never gone through someone's phone without them knowing, I'm

1469
01:16:20,080 --> 01:16:22,439
Speaker 1: definitely capable of it. I just know that. I think

1470
01:16:22,439 --> 01:16:25,799
Speaker 1: we're all capable of Your alarm went off. That's probably

1471
01:16:26,439 --> 01:16:28,360
Speaker 1: that dragged into the phone. That's why he was shutting

1472
01:16:28,360 --> 01:16:31,439
Speaker 1: it off. And then he was like, I mean, it's

1473
01:16:31,439 --> 01:16:33,080
Speaker 1: not but it's not like I was asking for it,

1474
01:16:33,200 --> 01:16:37,160
Speaker 1: because my alarm went off, like he shouldn't have done it. Well,

1475
01:16:37,280 --> 01:16:40,160
Speaker 1: my alarm was I'm cheating on you. I'm cheating on

1476
01:16:40,400 --> 01:16:43,120
Speaker 1: you looking the phone, I'm cheating on you. Some maybe

1477
01:16:43,120 --> 01:16:45,400
Speaker 1: I was asking for That's a great Robin song. All Right,

1478
01:16:45,439 --> 01:16:46,800
Speaker 1: we gotta go. Thank you so much for letting us

1479
01:16:46,840 --> 01:16:49,120
Speaker 1: go late. Uh noah, I love you so much. Thanks

1480
01:16:49,160 --> 01:16:52,280
Speaker 1: for listening to the show. Uh, don't be cut and Chi,

1481
01:16:54,680 --> 01:16:55,880
Speaker 1: I was going to try to do something about the

1482
01:16:55,880 --> 01:16:58,360
Speaker 1: guitar teacher man I owe him. That guy's a singer.

1483
01:17:00,080 --> 01:17:00,120
Speaker 1: H