1
00:00:06,400 --> 00:00:08,479
Speaker 1: Hey, this is Annie and you're listening to Stuff Mob

2
00:00:08,560 --> 00:00:23,360
Speaker 1: Never Told You. It's officially twenty nineteen, and that means

3
00:00:23,760 --> 00:00:28,040
Speaker 1: New Year, New you, New Year's resolutions. I used to

4
00:00:28,080 --> 00:00:31,440
Speaker 1: be a big New Year's resolutions person. I was pretty

5
00:00:31,480 --> 00:00:34,000
Speaker 1: good at keeping them. A lot of my strangest skills

6
00:00:34,479 --> 00:00:37,280
Speaker 1: like knife throwing or acts throwing, a lot of throwing

7
00:00:37,280 --> 00:00:41,040
Speaker 1: of weapons I learned thanks to a New Year's resolution.

8
00:00:41,800 --> 00:00:43,920
Speaker 1: I for the most part, stopped making them, though, or

9
00:00:43,920 --> 00:00:45,919
Speaker 1: I make very vague ones, which are the worst if

10
00:00:45,960 --> 00:00:49,120
Speaker 1: you intend on actually sticking to them. I always kind

11
00:00:49,120 --> 00:00:52,400
Speaker 1: of chuckle at the noticeable increase in patronage at the

12
00:00:52,440 --> 00:00:56,520
Speaker 1: gym in January that almost completely dies down by mid February.

13
00:00:56,600 --> 00:00:58,680
Speaker 1: Gives me a little bit of a laugh, which begs

14
00:00:58,720 --> 00:01:03,560
Speaker 1: the question do these New Year's resolutions work? We went

15
00:01:03,600 --> 00:01:09,200
Speaker 1: back to this classic episode to find out. Welcome to

16
00:01:09,520 --> 00:01:18,320
Speaker 1: Stuff Mom Never Told You from how stupp works dot com. Hello,

17
00:01:18,400 --> 00:01:21,440
Speaker 1: and welcome to the podcast. I'm Kristen and I'm Caroline

18
00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:25,240
Speaker 1: in Caroline. Let's just go ahead and do this. Hi

19
00:01:26,280 --> 00:01:36,200
Speaker 1: four three two one, Happy new podcast, Happy new podcast. Folks.

20
00:01:36,280 --> 00:01:38,399
Speaker 1: Guess what we made it through two thousand thirteen and

21
00:01:38,520 --> 00:01:42,959
Speaker 1: it is two thousand fourteen. We're coming at you the

22
00:01:43,040 --> 00:01:45,880
Speaker 1: very first day of the year. If you are listening

23
00:01:45,959 --> 00:01:48,880
Speaker 1: to this, the day is coming out. And if you are,

24
00:01:49,080 --> 00:01:53,080
Speaker 1: I hope that you are feeling bride eyed and bushy

25
00:01:53,160 --> 00:01:56,680
Speaker 1: tailed from the evening beforehand. I know I typically do

26
00:01:56,760 --> 00:01:59,240
Speaker 1: on New Year's Day, That's right, because you know what

27
00:01:59,400 --> 00:02:04,040
Speaker 1: makes a head feel great is a few glasses of champagne. Yeah, definitely.

28
00:02:04,160 --> 00:02:06,400
Speaker 1: And Caroline, you know a great way to start a

29
00:02:06,400 --> 00:02:12,080
Speaker 1: new year with a rerun. I think it's an interesting rerun,

30
00:02:12,280 --> 00:02:15,959
Speaker 1: very very topical. Yeah, you know old langzine where old

31
00:02:15,960 --> 00:02:20,919
Speaker 1: acquaintance be forgot. Well, we're going to actually remember, Um,

32
00:02:20,960 --> 00:02:24,560
Speaker 1: We're gonna do the opposite and remember last year's episode

33
00:02:24,639 --> 00:02:29,480
Speaker 1: on New Year's Resolutions, because tis the season we're making resolutions,

34
00:02:29,880 --> 00:02:31,840
Speaker 1: and last year we took a look at the science

35
00:02:32,200 --> 00:02:36,639
Speaker 1: of New Year's resolutions and will power to find out

36
00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:39,799
Speaker 1: whether or not we really have a very good chance

37
00:02:39,840 --> 00:02:43,240
Speaker 1: of sticking to our guns on them. That's right. And

38
00:02:43,360 --> 00:02:45,399
Speaker 1: this year I can't say that my resolutions I don't

39
00:02:45,440 --> 00:02:47,600
Speaker 1: really tend to make them. I can't say that they're

40
00:02:47,720 --> 00:02:51,720
Speaker 1: very different for this year, mainly just to uh continue

41
00:02:51,760 --> 00:02:55,200
Speaker 1: to try to get up early and exercise before work. Yeah,

42
00:02:55,240 --> 00:02:58,320
Speaker 1: I'm I'm right there with you. I'm resolving to get

43
00:02:58,400 --> 00:03:02,840
Speaker 1: up earlier as well. I'm not looking forward now that

44
00:03:03,080 --> 00:03:05,560
Speaker 1: is so comfortable. That is comfortable. But hey, on a

45
00:03:05,639 --> 00:03:10,320
Speaker 1: positive note, I'm also resolving better podcast than ever before

46
00:03:10,360 --> 00:03:15,200
Speaker 1: in two thousand fourteen. That's right. Yeah. So with that

47
00:03:15,680 --> 00:03:19,919
Speaker 1: on a hopeful note, we shall now segue into this

48
00:03:20,160 --> 00:03:25,360
Speaker 1: revisitation of our examination of whether or not New Year's

49
00:03:25,360 --> 00:03:29,200
Speaker 1: resolutions really work. Yeah, so take a listen and let

50
00:03:29,280 --> 00:03:36,040
Speaker 1: us know yours. I myself, I'm not really big on

51
00:03:36,080 --> 00:03:40,160
Speaker 1: New Year's I think the pressure is too high for

52
00:03:40,200 --> 00:03:43,280
Speaker 1: this holiday. I I find it stressful. I would rather

53
00:03:43,480 --> 00:03:46,480
Speaker 1: just I know it's an excuse to party, and yes,

54
00:03:46,600 --> 00:03:48,360
Speaker 1: I will find a party, but I would rather just

55
00:03:48,480 --> 00:03:50,960
Speaker 1: like have a low key night of hanging out rather

56
00:03:51,040 --> 00:03:52,760
Speaker 1: than trying to go somewhere where I do have to

57
00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:57,120
Speaker 1: wear sequence. There's also a lot of pressure to like

58
00:03:57,920 --> 00:03:59,920
Speaker 1: tell yourself and everyone around you that you're going to

59
00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:03,440
Speaker 1: somehow make yourself better. Oh yeah, it's the fresh start.

60
00:04:03,680 --> 00:04:05,440
Speaker 1: And it's not just in the US. This is a

61
00:04:05,440 --> 00:04:10,960
Speaker 1: cross cultural thing. People love New Year's because it gives

62
00:04:11,040 --> 00:04:14,040
Speaker 1: us a chance at least mentally to say, Okay, you

63
00:04:14,040 --> 00:04:18,200
Speaker 1: know what, last year I did some things whatever, But

64
00:04:18,240 --> 00:04:20,880
Speaker 1: I can I can be I can be a new

65
00:04:20,920 --> 00:04:24,320
Speaker 1: person this year. I can resolve to make myself better.

66
00:04:24,360 --> 00:04:26,880
Speaker 1: Do you have you do you make New Year's resolutions? Caroline?

67
00:04:27,040 --> 00:04:29,680
Speaker 1: I do not. I used to when I was a

68
00:04:29,800 --> 00:04:35,320
Speaker 1: naive person who believed that by simply saying I will

69
00:04:35,360 --> 00:04:39,720
Speaker 1: start running, I would start running, and that consistently did

70
00:04:39,760 --> 00:04:41,640
Speaker 1: not happen. So I was like, you know what, instead

71
00:04:41,680 --> 00:04:46,400
Speaker 1: of just disappointing myself every January three, I Am just

72
00:04:46,600 --> 00:04:50,680
Speaker 1: going to try to make slow lifestyle changes here and

73
00:04:50,720 --> 00:04:54,400
Speaker 1: there and not worry about promising something on January one. Well,

74
00:04:54,440 --> 00:04:58,040
Speaker 1: as we will get into more in the podcast, Caroline,

75
00:04:58,120 --> 00:05:00,880
Speaker 1: you are really on the right track when it comes

76
00:05:00,920 --> 00:05:05,760
Speaker 1: to when it comes to these resolutions, um. But first

77
00:05:05,839 --> 00:05:10,400
Speaker 1: before we get into whether or not resolutions really work

78
00:05:11,120 --> 00:05:14,480
Speaker 1: and when they do, because I have known people who

79
00:05:14,680 --> 00:05:17,880
Speaker 1: will set up with some kind of large goal like

80
00:05:18,480 --> 00:05:22,760
Speaker 1: quitting smoking or having a healthier lifestyle, losing weight, and

81
00:05:22,960 --> 00:05:26,080
Speaker 1: they actually stick to it and they do it. Um.

82
00:05:26,240 --> 00:05:30,040
Speaker 1: So we'll talk about the ways that people can succeed

83
00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:33,680
Speaker 1: in those kinds of things. But USA dot Gov just

84
00:05:33,760 --> 00:05:36,560
Speaker 1: for fun has tracked the kinds of things, the most

85
00:05:36,600 --> 00:05:40,640
Speaker 1: common things at least that Americans resolved to do, and

86
00:05:40,760 --> 00:05:48,400
Speaker 1: they're pretty easy to guess. Less boozing, less using keep rhyming,

87
00:05:48,800 --> 00:05:53,200
Speaker 1: eating healthier food, getting a better education, better job, getting fit,

88
00:05:53,400 --> 00:05:55,719
Speaker 1: managing debt, which I'm sure is a big one. I

89
00:05:55,760 --> 00:05:59,080
Speaker 1: think money matters in general are a big one for people, um,

90
00:05:59,160 --> 00:06:05,120
Speaker 1: quitting smoke, taking trips, volunteering, saving money, basically becoming perfect

91
00:06:05,200 --> 00:06:11,000
Speaker 1: human beings. Yeah. I do better with some of those things.

92
00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:14,880
Speaker 1: It's all in cycles. Sometimes I'm really good at saving

93
00:06:14,920 --> 00:06:17,960
Speaker 1: money because I just get in the mindset of like, no, dummy,

94
00:06:18,040 --> 00:06:20,640
Speaker 1: you can't go to the mall every day. That's just ridiculous.

95
00:06:20,640 --> 00:06:23,440
Speaker 1: Who does that? And so I become really good, you know,

96
00:06:23,520 --> 00:06:25,720
Speaker 1: eating at home instead of eating out and doing all

97
00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:30,520
Speaker 1: that stuff. But sometimes you can't be good all the time. No,

98
00:06:30,800 --> 00:06:36,400
Speaker 1: you need to allow yourself some indulgences. Absolutely. But uh.

99
00:06:36,400 --> 00:06:39,680
Speaker 1: One interesting thing though about New Year's resolutions is just

100
00:06:40,240 --> 00:06:44,440
Speaker 1: how long we've been making them. I suspected that it

101
00:06:44,520 --> 00:06:48,640
Speaker 1: was more of a modern cultural invention, that New Year's

102
00:06:48,680 --> 00:06:52,440
Speaker 1: resolutions are this huge thing that everybody has to do,

103
00:06:52,600 --> 00:06:55,200
Speaker 1: but no, in fact, This is coming from the Book

104
00:06:55,240 --> 00:06:59,520
Speaker 1: of Christmas by James Struther's She talks about the history

105
00:06:59,560 --> 00:07:03,400
Speaker 1: of resolute making and how ancient Romans and Babylonians would

106
00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:06,880
Speaker 1: make resolutions at the start of the year, and Babylonians

107
00:07:07,520 --> 00:07:11,600
Speaker 1: specifically promised to repay debts and return borrowed objects, and

108
00:07:11,640 --> 00:07:15,200
Speaker 1: this was also popular among not surprisingly much later in

109
00:07:15,280 --> 00:07:19,360
Speaker 1: history the Puritans. I like the Babylonian resolutions. Well, they're

110
00:07:19,400 --> 00:07:22,240
Speaker 1: not really resolutions, but just like I'm gonna give back

111
00:07:22,280 --> 00:07:25,240
Speaker 1: what's ode that that seems like it's an easier, more

112
00:07:25,280 --> 00:07:29,679
Speaker 1: noble goal than I'm going to start eating fewer cheesy poofs.

113
00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:32,920
Speaker 1: Although that's pretty noble too. You can accomplish it. It's

114
00:07:32,960 --> 00:07:37,840
Speaker 1: it's true, um, but it's even still though, uh, these days,

115
00:07:37,880 --> 00:07:41,760
Speaker 1: I'd say there's a lot of cynicism towards resolutions, even

116
00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:44,440
Speaker 1: though it's something that it's it's a strange part of

117
00:07:44,480 --> 00:07:48,080
Speaker 1: almost human nature, it seems like, considering how long we've

118
00:07:48,120 --> 00:07:52,480
Speaker 1: been doing this. But it's also been accompanied by this

119
00:07:53,440 --> 00:07:59,840
Speaker 1: growing acknowledgement that maybe resolutions are just empty gestures that

120
00:08:00,040 --> 00:08:03,360
Speaker 1: we make to make ourselves feel better at the beginning

121
00:08:03,400 --> 00:08:07,840
Speaker 1: of the year. For instance, Struthers quotes Mark Twain, who

122
00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:11,400
Speaker 1: once said New Year's Day is now the accepted time

123
00:08:11,440 --> 00:08:14,840
Speaker 1: to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you

124
00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:19,920
Speaker 1: can begin paving hell with them as usual. Oh, Samuel Clemmens,

125
00:08:20,120 --> 00:08:23,320
Speaker 1: some people last longer than a week. Yeah, oh yeah, well.

126
00:08:23,400 --> 00:08:27,880
Speaker 1: Oscar Wilde also was skeptical. He said good resolutions are

127
00:08:27,880 --> 00:08:30,040
Speaker 1: simply checks that men draw on a bank where they

128
00:08:30,120 --> 00:08:34,480
Speaker 1: have no account. And the thing is Mark Twain and

129
00:08:34,520 --> 00:08:37,360
Speaker 1: Oscar Wilde were not off the mark in terms of

130
00:08:37,400 --> 00:08:42,559
Speaker 1: being dubious that people will actually stick to their resolutions.

131
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:45,599
Speaker 1: So there were two studies by John Norcross of the

132
00:08:45,720 --> 00:08:50,160
Speaker 1: University of Scranton back in nine. John John Norcross is

133
00:08:50,200 --> 00:08:54,160
Speaker 1: actually focused a lot on resolutions, will power all that stuff,

134
00:08:54,640 --> 00:08:59,280
Speaker 1: And he found that seventy seven percent of people maintain

135
00:08:59,360 --> 00:09:02,320
Speaker 1: their resolutions for one week. So here we go, one week.

136
00:09:02,360 --> 00:09:06,360
Speaker 1: That's that's pretty good. Good job, only maintained for the

137
00:09:06,440 --> 00:09:08,840
Speaker 1: full two years that they followed people. But I still

138
00:09:08,880 --> 00:09:12,400
Speaker 1: think that's pretty good almost of people holding onto the

139
00:09:12,440 --> 00:09:15,080
Speaker 1: resolutions for two years. Yeah, although I mean we don't

140
00:09:15,080 --> 00:09:18,640
Speaker 1: we don't have details on what precisely those resolutions were.

141
00:09:18,960 --> 00:09:21,600
Speaker 1: Um And I also really liked the name of the study.

142
00:09:21,679 --> 00:09:26,800
Speaker 1: It was called the Resolution Solution Longitudinal Examination of New

143
00:09:26,880 --> 00:09:32,200
Speaker 1: Year's Change Attempts. I love academia sometimes. Um. Yeah. And

144
00:09:32,559 --> 00:09:36,679
Speaker 1: among those two people that Norcross tracked, a little bit

145
00:09:36,720 --> 00:09:39,319
Speaker 1: over half of them experienced at least one slip up,

146
00:09:39,840 --> 00:09:43,280
Speaker 1: and those slip ups would be precipitated by self reported

147
00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:47,480
Speaker 1: lack of personal control excessive stress, which is something to

148
00:09:47,600 --> 00:09:52,200
Speaker 1: keep in mind as we talk about resolutions and negative emotions.

149
00:09:52,280 --> 00:09:55,520
Speaker 1: And even though um, those studies are a little bit

150
00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:59,880
Speaker 1: dated there, the numbers still apply today for the mo

151
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:01,920
Speaker 1: this part. It's not like we've gotten any better really

152
00:10:02,080 --> 00:10:07,000
Speaker 1: keeping resolutions in the intervening years. Um. John Tierney over

153
00:10:07,120 --> 00:10:11,280
Speaker 1: at the New York Times recently looked at statistics on

154
00:10:12,040 --> 00:10:15,559
Speaker 1: how how good we are these days at keeping resolutions

155
00:10:15,559 --> 00:10:19,600
Speaker 1: and forewarned that, sorry to say this, folks, a third

156
00:10:19,760 --> 00:10:22,760
Speaker 1: of people will have broken their resolutions by January, and

157
00:10:22,880 --> 00:10:26,680
Speaker 1: half of us will just give up by July. But

158
00:10:26,800 --> 00:10:32,080
Speaker 1: that still leaves fifty percent after July. Um. And one

159
00:10:32,080 --> 00:10:35,880
Speaker 1: of the reasons why we tend to give up, um,

160
00:10:36,040 --> 00:10:39,839
Speaker 1: has to do with us finding ourselves or at least

161
00:10:39,880 --> 00:10:44,080
Speaker 1: thinking ourselves too busy perhaps to really put the effort

162
00:10:44,160 --> 00:10:47,760
Speaker 1: to dig in and make the sacrifices um. Also in

163
00:10:47,800 --> 00:10:50,320
Speaker 1: The New York Times, Tara Parker Pope reported on a

164
00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:54,679
Speaker 1: two thousand seventh survey by time management firm Franklin Covee

165
00:10:54,679 --> 00:10:57,880
Speaker 1: that pulled fifteen thousand customers. Uh, and they found that

166
00:10:57,920 --> 00:11:01,720
Speaker 1: nearly forty percent are read breaking their resolutions to having

167
00:11:01,800 --> 00:11:04,920
Speaker 1: too many other things to do, and then thirty three

168
00:11:05,000 --> 00:11:07,240
Speaker 1: percent we're just i would say probably a little more

169
00:11:07,280 --> 00:11:09,839
Speaker 1: honest and said they just weren't as committed to the

170
00:11:09,920 --> 00:11:13,680
Speaker 1: resolutions as they were when the clock struck midnight. Yeah.

171
00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:16,719
Speaker 1: Well it's hard. It's hard to go from being a

172
00:11:16,840 --> 00:11:19,880
Speaker 1: couch cent a day in and day out to being like, no,

173
00:11:19,960 --> 00:11:22,040
Speaker 1: I'm going to train for a marathon. I mean that's

174
00:11:22,400 --> 00:11:25,360
Speaker 1: that's a major step. And to just decide automatically that

175
00:11:25,400 --> 00:11:27,960
Speaker 1: you're going to do that, like maybe get an app

176
00:11:28,160 --> 00:11:30,360
Speaker 1: like the couch to the five k app or something

177
00:11:30,480 --> 00:11:32,679
Speaker 1: like that, like take it in steps, it is it

178
00:11:32,760 --> 00:11:35,120
Speaker 1: can be so overwhelming. I know, you know what I'm

179
00:11:35,160 --> 00:11:36,920
Speaker 1: talking about. It can be so overwhelming to be like,

180
00:11:37,720 --> 00:11:40,400
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna make a radical life change, right just

181
00:11:40,480 --> 00:11:44,160
Speaker 1: because it's New Year's Yeah, and we don't think about uh,

182
00:11:44,480 --> 00:11:49,240
Speaker 1: the incremental steps needed to get to that place of

183
00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:55,320
Speaker 1: actually having a resolution that works. Yeah. Um, so speaking

184
00:11:55,440 --> 00:11:59,319
Speaker 1: of resolutions working, you you do really have to be committed.

185
00:11:59,360 --> 00:12:01,000
Speaker 1: And so, you know, Chris inside of the thirty three

186
00:12:01,040 --> 00:12:03,960
Speaker 1: percent who said they simply just weren't committed, they didn't

187
00:12:03,960 --> 00:12:06,400
Speaker 1: feel like, you know, following through on whatever promise they made.

188
00:12:06,840 --> 00:12:10,839
Speaker 1: And uh. Kimberly Moffatt, who's a psychotherapist, quoted in the

189
00:12:10,920 --> 00:12:14,199
Speaker 1: Huffington Post, said that New Year's resolutions only work in

190
00:12:14,400 --> 00:12:18,240
Speaker 1: very few cases, and typically with those who have a

191
00:12:18,320 --> 00:12:20,880
Speaker 1: will of steel. And this gets into the whole like

192
00:12:21,160 --> 00:12:25,920
Speaker 1: willpower issue, like strength of will what makes people commit,

193
00:12:26,559 --> 00:12:28,959
Speaker 1: and so it can be really hard to commit. This

194
00:12:29,120 --> 00:12:32,120
Speaker 1: is another John Norcross study who mentioned him earlier, this

195
00:12:32,360 --> 00:12:35,319
Speaker 1: one in two thousand two. He found that by the

196
00:12:35,520 --> 00:12:39,400
Speaker 1: end of January, thirty six percent had already broken their resolutions.

197
00:12:39,520 --> 00:12:42,480
Speaker 1: Like we said, it can be overwhelming, and it really

198
00:12:42,600 --> 00:12:44,800
Speaker 1: is overwhelming if we're faced with too many tasks. So

199
00:12:44,920 --> 00:12:46,800
Speaker 1: not only are we like going back to work, we're

200
00:12:46,840 --> 00:12:49,640
Speaker 1: getting over the holidays, We're trying to clean up after

201
00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:52,079
Speaker 1: all the relatives have been in the house, and we

202
00:12:52,160 --> 00:12:54,319
Speaker 1: want to start training for a marathon. It can just

203
00:12:54,520 --> 00:12:58,959
Speaker 1: be a lot to handle. Yeah, And Michael Bader, who

204
00:12:59,040 --> 00:13:02,720
Speaker 1: is a senior advisor for the Institute for Change, also

205
00:13:03,400 --> 00:13:07,720
Speaker 1: says that resolutions don't work because we have an unconscious

206
00:13:07,800 --> 00:13:12,360
Speaker 1: resolution to not change. Basically, he thinks that our bad

207
00:13:12,440 --> 00:13:16,000
Speaker 1: behaviors serve unconscious beliefs and needs that are the building

208
00:13:16,120 --> 00:13:20,599
Speaker 1: blocks of our identities. So he gives an example of

209
00:13:21,360 --> 00:13:25,600
Speaker 1: an overeater who's unsuccessful at dieting because binging provides momentary

210
00:13:25,800 --> 00:13:30,559
Speaker 1: relief from feelings of loneliness and or anxiety. But I mean,

211
00:13:30,800 --> 00:13:32,520
Speaker 1: the thing is though, because he said he also goes

212
00:13:32,559 --> 00:13:33,920
Speaker 1: on to say, like, this has nothing to do with

213
00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:38,800
Speaker 1: heredity or neurobiology. You know, it's just these these unconscious

214
00:13:38,840 --> 00:13:41,719
Speaker 1: parts of who we are. We can't divorce ourselves from them.

215
00:13:41,760 --> 00:13:44,079
Speaker 1: But it sounds like that's just not getting at the

216
00:13:44,320 --> 00:13:48,319
Speaker 1: real root of the problem and shrugging off. You know,

217
00:13:48,520 --> 00:13:51,080
Speaker 1: Oh well, I'm not gonna I'm not gonna change, really,

218
00:13:51,120 --> 00:13:54,240
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna like, I don't feel like cheesy poofs

219
00:13:54,440 --> 00:13:58,160
Speaker 1: are a cornerstone of my identity. I just really like them,

220
00:13:58,559 --> 00:14:00,920
Speaker 1: that's all. Like I could don't think the giving up

221
00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:04,400
Speaker 1: cheesy poofs will reveal anything that's like deep seated in

222
00:14:04,480 --> 00:14:08,400
Speaker 1: my brain. But what does the poof represent Caroline happiness?

223
00:14:08,520 --> 00:14:13,760
Speaker 1: Oh oh there it ish um. Well, another reason is

224
00:14:13,840 --> 00:14:16,719
Speaker 1: that we really don't want to do them. According to

225
00:14:17,280 --> 00:14:20,480
Speaker 1: this is Steve Airy, who's a negative Nancy confidence coach.

226
00:14:20,640 --> 00:14:23,600
Speaker 1: Quoted over at life Hacker. He said that this is

227
00:14:23,680 --> 00:14:27,440
Speaker 1: because resolutions are really about what we should do rather

228
00:14:27,560 --> 00:14:29,480
Speaker 1: than what we want to do. So it's like doing

229
00:14:29,520 --> 00:14:31,880
Speaker 1: your homework instead of playing video games. You know, it's

230
00:14:31,920 --> 00:14:34,080
Speaker 1: like it's what you should do to better yourself, but

231
00:14:34,280 --> 00:14:37,320
Speaker 1: do you really feel like you want to do it?

232
00:14:37,880 --> 00:14:41,320
Speaker 1: And then he goes on to explain that they're like goals,

233
00:14:41,520 --> 00:14:44,000
Speaker 1: but he said that this is a negative, which I

234
00:14:44,120 --> 00:14:45,840
Speaker 1: kind of take issue with and I think is weird.

235
00:14:46,280 --> 00:14:49,440
Speaker 1: So he says that resolutions are like goals, which puts

236
00:14:49,440 --> 00:14:51,840
Speaker 1: a gap between where you are now and where you

237
00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:55,040
Speaker 1: want to be. And I don't think that's inherently negative.

238
00:14:55,080 --> 00:14:56,720
Speaker 1: I think if you see a goal that you want

239
00:14:56,760 --> 00:14:58,880
Speaker 1: to go for, whether that's getting a new job or

240
00:14:58,920 --> 00:15:01,480
Speaker 1: losing weight, you should go for. But anyway, he says

241
00:15:01,600 --> 00:15:04,840
Speaker 1: that making resolutions make you look at what's next, not

242
00:15:05,040 --> 00:15:06,880
Speaker 1: what's right in front of you. And they make you

243
00:15:07,000 --> 00:15:10,560
Speaker 1: feel less than lowering your self esteem, which I think

244
00:15:10,720 --> 00:15:13,200
Speaker 1: I feel like he's getting it backwards. I don't know

245
00:15:13,200 --> 00:15:15,800
Speaker 1: about your I mean I could see that coming into

246
00:15:15,880 --> 00:15:19,560
Speaker 1: effect if you set yourself up for cycles of defeat

247
00:15:19,600 --> 00:15:23,600
Speaker 1: where you continually set goals and then that are too

248
00:15:23,680 --> 00:15:25,960
Speaker 1: ambitious and then you don't meet up to them, and

249
00:15:26,120 --> 00:15:30,280
Speaker 1: then that would probably ding your self esteem and you know,

250
00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:33,440
Speaker 1: lower you rather than propel you forward. Because it seems

251
00:15:33,480 --> 00:15:38,960
Speaker 1: like resolution should be more of a motivational factor. I

252
00:15:39,080 --> 00:15:42,480
Speaker 1: think it's more something that Christie Hedges, who's a leadership

253
00:15:42,560 --> 00:15:46,760
Speaker 1: coach um and quoted over at Forbes, talked about the

254
00:15:46,920 --> 00:15:50,920
Speaker 1: fact that we set too lofty of goals. It's like

255
00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:56,080
Speaker 1: this all or nothing thing I'm going to become. You know,

256
00:15:56,400 --> 00:15:59,280
Speaker 1: I'm going to sculpt my body so much so that

257
00:15:59,360 --> 00:16:01,480
Speaker 1: when I go to the beach, people will ask to

258
00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:04,320
Speaker 1: take my photo. And that's not gonna It's not gonna

259
00:16:04,360 --> 00:16:06,840
Speaker 1: happen with you know, one zoomba class a week or

260
00:16:06,960 --> 00:16:10,280
Speaker 1: whatever it is that we think um can do it.

261
00:16:10,360 --> 00:16:15,880
Speaker 1: And so when we don't hit this transformational point in

262
00:16:15,960 --> 00:16:18,680
Speaker 1: a short amount of time, then we just throw the

263
00:16:18,760 --> 00:16:21,280
Speaker 1: whole throw the whole thing. Out. Yeah. Well, she also

264
00:16:21,320 --> 00:16:23,800
Speaker 1: says that culturally we're all pretty cynical and that we

265
00:16:23,920 --> 00:16:26,400
Speaker 1: live up to our low expectations because we're setting these

266
00:16:26,400 --> 00:16:30,320
Speaker 1: incredible goals that we don't honestly expect to meet, and

267
00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:32,840
Speaker 1: so it's that much easier to just be like whatever,

268
00:16:32,960 --> 00:16:34,640
Speaker 1: I'm not going to go run anymore or I'm not

269
00:16:34,720 --> 00:16:37,000
Speaker 1: gonna do X y Z anymore, because I never really

270
00:16:37,000 --> 00:16:39,680
Speaker 1: expected that i'd you know, succeed anyway. I also like

271
00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:43,160
Speaker 1: how she refers to this as the cynical zeitgeist, which

272
00:16:43,200 --> 00:16:49,480
Speaker 1: supports the gravitational pull of the status quo cynical zeitgeist.

273
00:16:49,560 --> 00:17:03,920
Speaker 1: Everybody's a daria um. But there is some science though too,

274
00:17:05,200 --> 00:17:10,119
Speaker 1: resolutions and more specifically to the will power that it

275
00:17:10,240 --> 00:17:13,560
Speaker 1: takes to change things. Because I think that resolutions can

276
00:17:13,640 --> 00:17:15,800
Speaker 1: be a very good thing. I think that we're just

277
00:17:16,000 --> 00:17:19,200
Speaker 1: going about them, oftentimes the wrong way. But when you

278
00:17:19,320 --> 00:17:24,680
Speaker 1: figure out how willpower works in the brain, maybe we

279
00:17:24,760 --> 00:17:29,520
Speaker 1: are arming ourselves with some some information to help us

280
00:17:29,920 --> 00:17:38,200
Speaker 1: succeed because sticking to resolutions, i e. Willpower takes actual energy. Yeah,

281
00:17:38,320 --> 00:17:40,040
Speaker 1: so it turns out that when you run out of

282
00:17:40,040 --> 00:17:42,600
Speaker 1: will plat power, you're running out of energy. Like Kristen

283
00:17:42,640 --> 00:17:46,320
Speaker 1: said that is powered by glucose in the bloodstream, which

284
00:17:46,480 --> 00:17:51,720
Speaker 1: Roy F. Baumeister, a social psychologist, calls ego depletion. He

285
00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:54,720
Speaker 1: points out that you really have to anticipate the limits

286
00:17:54,760 --> 00:17:58,440
Speaker 1: of your willpower. And what is it about willpower? Why

287
00:17:58,480 --> 00:18:00,639
Speaker 1: does it run out? What's going on? Well, one of

288
00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:05,200
Speaker 1: the reasons why it runs out is because all of

289
00:18:05,280 --> 00:18:11,080
Speaker 1: the research into into ego depletion, into willpower, UM finds

290
00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:15,320
Speaker 1: that we don't really have very much of it. Willpower

291
00:18:15,440 --> 00:18:19,720
Speaker 1: is a very fleeting thing humans like to give into

292
00:18:19,840 --> 00:18:23,960
Speaker 1: their indulgences, and UM, if we don't exercise it much

293
00:18:24,119 --> 00:18:27,320
Speaker 1: like a muscle, we we aren't going to be able

294
00:18:27,440 --> 00:18:30,159
Speaker 1: to to use it very much. UM. And this was

295
00:18:30,240 --> 00:18:33,879
Speaker 1: something that uh jonah Laire who before I can hear

296
00:18:33,960 --> 00:18:37,040
Speaker 1: eyebrows raising right now, I realized he is uh run

297
00:18:37,119 --> 00:18:41,840
Speaker 1: into some issues lately with some citations, but nevertheless he wrote, Uh,

298
00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:44,720
Speaker 1: he did run a fascinating piece over at wired awhile

299
00:18:44,800 --> 00:18:47,800
Speaker 1: ago UM called the willpower trick, And I just wanted

300
00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:51,000
Speaker 1: to call out some of these studies that he highlighted. Uh.

301
00:18:51,080 --> 00:18:54,600
Speaker 1: He talks about behavioral economists Baba Shiv who asked two

302
00:18:55,200 --> 00:18:58,480
Speaker 1: separate groups to memorize either a two digit or a

303
00:18:58,600 --> 00:19:03,160
Speaker 1: seven digit number, and later on those two groups were

304
00:19:03,440 --> 00:19:06,920
Speaker 1: um tasked with choosing between a piece of chocolate cake

305
00:19:07,640 --> 00:19:09,920
Speaker 1: or a fruit bowl, knowing that the fruit would be

306
00:19:09,920 --> 00:19:13,840
Speaker 1: a healthier option. And you found Ship found that the

307
00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:17,920
Speaker 1: people who had to memorize the seven digit number were

308
00:19:18,320 --> 00:19:22,320
Speaker 1: much more likely to just given to the temptation and

309
00:19:22,440 --> 00:19:27,280
Speaker 1: eat a piece of chocolate cake because Ships surmised their

310
00:19:27,440 --> 00:19:32,879
Speaker 1: brains were more tax those blood glu glucose levels were lower,

311
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:35,440
Speaker 1: and hence they had more ego depletion. Yeah, and this

312
00:19:35,640 --> 00:19:37,640
Speaker 1: is the same thing. You get home from work. All day,

313
00:19:38,040 --> 00:19:41,840
Speaker 1: You've probably exercised willpower, not just in avoiding the dessert

314
00:19:41,920 --> 00:19:45,280
Speaker 1: tray at launch maybe, but also like not cursing all

315
00:19:45,359 --> 00:19:48,240
Speaker 1: day work. You've exercised willpower to not be your usual

316
00:19:48,400 --> 00:19:52,360
Speaker 1: jerk self. You get home at night, your brain is tired,

317
00:19:52,560 --> 00:19:56,040
Speaker 1: and you're like, Okay, I could grill a chicken breast

318
00:19:56,600 --> 00:19:59,520
Speaker 1: or I could just eat this whole macaroni and cheese

319
00:19:59,640 --> 00:20:03,879
Speaker 1: play from the grocery store. I love cheese is the theme.

320
00:20:03,960 --> 00:20:05,480
Speaker 1: I think this is a thing. Think it's a theme,

321
00:20:05,520 --> 00:20:09,560
Speaker 1: but I like it. Um But going more into the research.

322
00:20:09,720 --> 00:20:15,000
Speaker 1: Back in the nineteen sixties, there's a famous experiment by

323
00:20:15,160 --> 00:20:19,600
Speaker 1: a guy named Walter Mitchell who wanted to test whether

324
00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:24,040
Speaker 1: or not kids could hold out for treats, basically looking

325
00:20:24,080 --> 00:20:29,200
Speaker 1: at will power in childhood, and he identified among the

326
00:20:29,280 --> 00:20:33,120
Speaker 1: kids who were able to hold out, he identified something

327
00:20:33,200 --> 00:20:38,720
Speaker 1: he called strategic allocation of attention, in which they literally

328
00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:41,800
Speaker 1: distracted themselves from the I think it was a marshmallow

329
00:20:42,160 --> 00:20:44,000
Speaker 1: or some kind of chocolate treat on the table that

330
00:20:44,080 --> 00:20:47,520
Speaker 1: it was sitting there. Um, yeah, because he told them

331
00:20:47,600 --> 00:20:50,680
Speaker 1: that they could either eat the marshmallow now or wait

332
00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:52,520
Speaker 1: until the researcher comes back in the room. And then

333
00:20:52,560 --> 00:20:56,160
Speaker 1: they get to marshmallows. And all of the kids who

334
00:20:56,240 --> 00:20:58,920
Speaker 1: just sat there and stare at the marshmallow and tried

335
00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:02,840
Speaker 1: to wait it out had much more trouble and would

336
00:21:02,880 --> 00:21:05,040
Speaker 1: usually just gobble up the marshmallow. But the kids who

337
00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:08,080
Speaker 1: would cover their eyes so they couldn't see it, they

338
00:21:08,080 --> 00:21:14,280
Speaker 1: would sing songs themselves, actually hide underneath the table, essentially

339
00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:20,040
Speaker 1: blocking that temptation stimulus from view. We're able to hold

340
00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:23,159
Speaker 1: out the longest, and so that's um one thing that

341
00:21:23,720 --> 00:21:26,520
Speaker 1: researchers have learned about willpower is the fact that those

342
00:21:26,560 --> 00:21:30,520
Speaker 1: of us who might seem to have the most actually

343
00:21:30,640 --> 00:21:36,720
Speaker 1: have to exercise it the least because we sidestep temptation

344
00:21:36,840 --> 00:21:40,680
Speaker 1: by just keeping those things out of out of our view.

345
00:21:40,760 --> 00:21:44,440
Speaker 1: Like if if you you're you know, pitfall is say

346
00:21:44,760 --> 00:21:48,240
Speaker 1: chocolate or cigarettes or alcohol, you don't have chocolate or

347
00:21:48,280 --> 00:21:52,320
Speaker 1: cigarettes or alcohol anywhere. You know. It's like if you're

348
00:21:52,320 --> 00:21:54,840
Speaker 1: an alcoholic, you're not going to go to a bar. Yeah,

349
00:21:55,320 --> 00:21:57,440
Speaker 1: I read. There was one comment aud the Wired article

350
00:21:57,520 --> 00:21:59,280
Speaker 1: the guy so that he kept his pack of cigarettes.

351
00:21:59,320 --> 00:22:00,800
Speaker 1: He would only let him help buy one pack at

352
00:22:00,840 --> 00:22:01,920
Speaker 1: a time, and he would keep it in the back

353
00:22:01,920 --> 00:22:04,800
Speaker 1: seat of his car. So every time he wanted to smoke,

354
00:22:04,880 --> 00:22:06,920
Speaker 1: he would have to go out and get his keys,

355
00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:09,920
Speaker 1: go outside, get the pack of cigarettes, get one cigarette,

356
00:22:09,920 --> 00:22:11,879
Speaker 1: because he would only let himself take one cigarette at

357
00:22:11,880 --> 00:22:13,800
Speaker 1: a time and then smoke it. And so that cut

358
00:22:13,880 --> 00:22:17,520
Speaker 1: way down on just like the boredom smoking. And he

359
00:22:17,640 --> 00:22:21,200
Speaker 1: actually ended up cutting way down in general. And I'm like, well,

360
00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:23,920
Speaker 1: am I going to have to keep all of my

361
00:22:24,080 --> 00:22:26,760
Speaker 1: chocolate in my car? You gotta keep the cheesy poofs

362
00:22:26,800 --> 00:22:30,600
Speaker 1: in the trunk, Caroline, I have a hatch I can

363
00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:33,800
Speaker 1: so easily get to it. Um. Yeah, but that's the

364
00:22:33,840 --> 00:22:36,480
Speaker 1: whole thing too. I don't keep ice cream in the house.

365
00:22:37,359 --> 00:22:39,440
Speaker 1: I don't go down the ice cream aisle at the

366
00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:41,920
Speaker 1: grocery store. Like if I super duper want ice cream,

367
00:22:42,200 --> 00:22:43,720
Speaker 1: it means that I have to either go to the

368
00:22:43,720 --> 00:22:46,080
Speaker 1: grocery store and get it or just like stop by

369
00:22:46,760 --> 00:22:49,840
Speaker 1: the ice cream parlor on the way home, which it's

370
00:22:49,920 --> 00:22:52,680
Speaker 1: just so much of a hassle. Who wants to do that? Well,

371
00:22:52,840 --> 00:22:55,440
Speaker 1: And the only thing though about this kind of research

372
00:22:55,600 --> 00:22:59,520
Speaker 1: is that it definitely gives us more insight into eliminating

373
00:23:00,119 --> 00:23:05,280
Speaker 1: problem behaviors, but not so much into activating positive ones.

374
00:23:05,680 --> 00:23:11,159
Speaker 1: In terms of exercising. Going to those zoomba classes, Um,

375
00:23:11,480 --> 00:23:14,560
Speaker 1: I can't keep up. Uh yeah, I've never taken a

376
00:23:14,680 --> 00:23:16,879
Speaker 1: zoomba class, but I have a feeling I would. I

377
00:23:16,920 --> 00:23:18,840
Speaker 1: don't know, I got I got two left fet folks

378
00:23:19,320 --> 00:23:22,520
Speaker 1: um or you know, like learning a new language or

379
00:23:22,720 --> 00:23:26,200
Speaker 1: going on trips. Tho's kind of volunteering those kinds of

380
00:23:26,280 --> 00:23:30,680
Speaker 1: things that require more time. But again it seems like,

381
00:23:30,760 --> 00:23:35,800
Speaker 1: no matter what the big lesson is, you gotta start small. Yeah, definitely, Yeah,

382
00:23:35,840 --> 00:23:39,080
Speaker 1: small steps are best. This was a stressed in l

383
00:23:39,400 --> 00:23:43,720
Speaker 1: l A Times article in December. Take short walks at work,

384
00:23:43,840 --> 00:23:46,720
Speaker 1: things like that, things that can add up to small

385
00:23:46,800 --> 00:23:49,560
Speaker 1: successes that can add up to a better feeling of

386
00:23:49,640 --> 00:23:53,240
Speaker 1: self control self esteem, like thinking, Okay, that wasn't hard

387
00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:55,560
Speaker 1: getting up at three thirty. When you're just like head

388
00:23:55,680 --> 00:23:57,800
Speaker 1: on your desk, getting up and just taking a walk

389
00:23:57,840 --> 00:24:00,879
Speaker 1: around your floor, around your building or whatever, that eventually

390
00:24:00,960 --> 00:24:03,040
Speaker 1: leads you to be like, Okay, well maybe then I

391
00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:05,480
Speaker 1: can run a mile on the treadmill instead when I

392
00:24:05,520 --> 00:24:08,640
Speaker 1: get home, you know, adding up to bigger and bigger things.

393
00:24:09,160 --> 00:24:12,680
Speaker 1: And same with the same with food. Um, it's the

394
00:24:12,720 --> 00:24:15,520
Speaker 1: whole Like if you're drastically cutting everything out, like okay,

395
00:24:15,560 --> 00:24:17,679
Speaker 1: well I'm gonna go from eating like a normal average

396
00:24:17,680 --> 00:24:21,159
Speaker 1: American diet to let us I'm gonna eat nothing but

397
00:24:21,320 --> 00:24:24,760
Speaker 1: let us in tomatoes. Yeah a, that's not a balanced diet.

398
00:24:25,640 --> 00:24:27,760
Speaker 1: Yeah you need some frosted flakes in there. And also

399
00:24:27,920 --> 00:24:32,200
Speaker 1: remember that those glucost levels too. It means that has

400
00:24:32,240 --> 00:24:35,040
Speaker 1: a big thing to do with the food, Like people

401
00:24:35,160 --> 00:24:38,520
Speaker 1: need to to eat to be healthy to keep those glucosts. Yeah,

402
00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:40,720
Speaker 1: that's why. Yeah, that's why your crash diets are not

403
00:24:40,800 --> 00:24:43,280
Speaker 1: gonna work. That's why it has to be a lifestyle change.

404
00:24:43,760 --> 00:24:47,359
Speaker 1: And Kimberly Moffatt, who we referenced earlier, said, in reference

405
00:24:47,400 --> 00:24:50,320
Speaker 1: to food in particular, think of what you're adding instead

406
00:24:50,359 --> 00:24:52,919
Speaker 1: of what you're taking away. This is something I've actually

407
00:24:52,960 --> 00:24:57,639
Speaker 1: told my mother, who refuses, I don't know it, refuses

408
00:24:57,720 --> 00:24:59,880
Speaker 1: to cut back in some areas and add an other.

409
00:25:00,400 --> 00:25:02,720
Speaker 1: I'm like, don't think of it as dieting. This isn't

410
00:25:02,800 --> 00:25:06,639
Speaker 1: like your neutral system. This isn't your eating rice cakes

411
00:25:06,680 --> 00:25:09,960
Speaker 1: and being sad. This is just trying to add fruits

412
00:25:10,000 --> 00:25:13,320
Speaker 1: and vegetables. Maybe take away a little bacon. I know,

413
00:25:13,720 --> 00:25:16,760
Speaker 1: cut who wants to take away bacon? I don't know nobody,

414
00:25:17,880 --> 00:25:22,360
Speaker 1: but yeah, And and people recommend that you don't spread yourself. Then,

415
00:25:22,560 --> 00:25:24,760
Speaker 1: in addition to this, you want to set a single,

416
00:25:25,440 --> 00:25:28,760
Speaker 1: clear goal because, as we mentioned earlier, being overwhelmed with

417
00:25:28,920 --> 00:25:32,840
Speaker 1: tasks and half two's and must dues, it just gets

418
00:25:32,920 --> 00:25:34,960
Speaker 1: to be too much and you won't stick to it. Yeah.

419
00:25:35,040 --> 00:25:38,600
Speaker 1: And on that same note, I think this is really important.

420
00:25:39,119 --> 00:25:43,159
Speaker 1: Don't overreact if you have a lapse. Lapses happen if

421
00:25:43,160 --> 00:25:47,320
Speaker 1: you skip a day of running. If you eat that hamburger,

422
00:25:47,480 --> 00:25:51,920
Speaker 1: enjoy it. Enjoy the relaxation that you take from not

423
00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:57,879
Speaker 1: exercising one day. Enjoy the satiation from that burger or

424
00:25:57,960 --> 00:26:00,720
Speaker 1: whatever food it is, that the delight to you so much,

425
00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:03,520
Speaker 1: and then you know and keep going. Don't expect yourself

426
00:26:03,600 --> 00:26:08,560
Speaker 1: to be completely perfect right off the bat or really ever. Yeah,

427
00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:10,879
Speaker 1: And also, I mean, don't think that that burger or

428
00:26:11,000 --> 00:26:14,840
Speaker 1: that day off from running means your entire diet or

429
00:26:14,960 --> 00:26:18,520
Speaker 1: exercise regiment or whatever is off track. You've that's just

430
00:26:18,640 --> 00:26:22,639
Speaker 1: one one day, one burger, one whatever, a bag of

431
00:26:22,760 --> 00:26:26,200
Speaker 1: cheesey poofs, whatever, But just that just means that the

432
00:26:26,280 --> 00:26:29,280
Speaker 1: next day you're back at it, right. Um. And we

433
00:26:29,400 --> 00:26:32,400
Speaker 1: have not touched on gender at all in this podcast,

434
00:26:32,520 --> 00:26:37,880
Speaker 1: but this, this whole thing about willpower and managing stress

435
00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:42,280
Speaker 1: and keeping your energy levels up is especially pertinent to

436
00:26:42,600 --> 00:26:46,199
Speaker 1: women because the American Psychological Association did a pretty end

437
00:26:46,280 --> 00:26:50,879
Speaker 1: up survey not too long ago on gender stress and

438
00:26:51,320 --> 00:26:56,080
Speaker 1: sticking to resolutions and willpower and found that women may

439
00:26:56,720 --> 00:27:01,200
Speaker 1: have a harder time sticking to goals like these than

440
00:27:01,800 --> 00:27:05,760
Speaker 1: men do. And I wonder if off the bat, and

441
00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:07,840
Speaker 1: I wasn't able to find any statistics on this, I

442
00:27:07,880 --> 00:27:11,720
Speaker 1: wonder if just from the get go, women um might

443
00:27:11,960 --> 00:27:17,480
Speaker 1: set more resolutions, and perhaps more unrealistic resolutions. And I

444
00:27:17,720 --> 00:27:20,320
Speaker 1: only say that because I feel like as soon as

445
00:27:20,359 --> 00:27:23,240
Speaker 1: the holidays are over, the messages that we are immediately

446
00:27:23,280 --> 00:27:28,040
Speaker 1: inundated with our swimsuit seasons around the corner, ladies, Yeah,

447
00:27:28,160 --> 00:27:31,480
Speaker 1: drop those last five pounds out all that turkey way,

448
00:27:33,280 --> 00:27:35,800
Speaker 1: I'm going to give birth to a turkey. Um. Yeah.

449
00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:38,119
Speaker 1: It turns out in the study that both genders do

450
00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:41,840
Speaker 1: cite lack of willpower as the number one barrier to change,

451
00:27:42,520 --> 00:27:45,080
Speaker 1: but women are more likely than men to cite the

452
00:27:45,160 --> 00:27:47,800
Speaker 1: lack of willpower as a barrier preventing them from making

453
00:27:47,840 --> 00:27:52,160
Speaker 1: the lifestyle changes recommended by a doctor. And so that's

454
00:27:52,200 --> 00:27:56,560
Speaker 1: thirty women versus twenty four percent men. Yeah. And women

455
00:27:56,600 --> 00:27:59,480
Speaker 1: are also far more likely than men to report that

456
00:27:59,560 --> 00:28:04,240
Speaker 1: a lack of willpower has prevented them from changing eating habits. Um.

457
00:28:04,480 --> 00:28:06,440
Speaker 1: When asked what they needed to change in order for

458
00:28:06,560 --> 00:28:10,200
Speaker 1: their willpower to improve, women were more likely than men

459
00:28:10,280 --> 00:28:13,640
Speaker 1: to say less fatigue and more confidence in their ability

460
00:28:13,720 --> 00:28:17,359
Speaker 1: to improve their will power. And also six times as

461
00:28:17,359 --> 00:28:21,159
Speaker 1: many women say that having more help with household chores

462
00:28:21,440 --> 00:28:23,639
Speaker 1: would allow them to improve their will power. And this

463
00:28:23,800 --> 00:28:26,359
Speaker 1: was something that I was thinking about in terms of,

464
00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:30,399
Speaker 1: you know, what it takes to set a resolution and

465
00:28:30,560 --> 00:28:33,680
Speaker 1: really keep to it and make a lifestyle change. And

466
00:28:34,040 --> 00:28:38,960
Speaker 1: as a single woman with no kids, like being as

467
00:28:39,080 --> 00:28:42,400
Speaker 1: autonomous as I will ever be probably in my life.

468
00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:46,200
Speaker 1: Um that I could see that happening. I could say,

469
00:28:46,240 --> 00:28:47,760
Speaker 1: oh I could, you know, I could, I could do

470
00:28:47,920 --> 00:28:50,760
Speaker 1: these kinds of things. Toss a kid in the mix.

471
00:28:51,440 --> 00:28:53,880
Speaker 1: I don't know, you know, because that's that increases your

472
00:28:53,880 --> 00:28:55,920
Speaker 1: stress level. That and I'm not blaming kids for things.

473
00:28:55,960 --> 00:29:00,440
Speaker 1: I'm just saying that I can understand how having partner,

474
00:29:00,560 --> 00:29:04,560
Speaker 1: having a household to take care of, having children, even pets,

475
00:29:04,840 --> 00:29:10,080
Speaker 1: um my pet free, uh, all of that can impact

476
00:29:10,480 --> 00:29:14,440
Speaker 1: this brain space that it takes to really set yourself

477
00:29:14,560 --> 00:29:18,080
Speaker 1: up for success. And it also speaks to I mean

478
00:29:18,160 --> 00:29:22,240
Speaker 1: not to to to be uh kind of cliche about it,

479
00:29:22,360 --> 00:29:25,600
Speaker 1: but it also speaks to the importance of you know,

480
00:29:25,800 --> 00:29:30,360
Speaker 1: establishing healthy lifestyles from the get go if possible, and

481
00:29:30,480 --> 00:29:33,680
Speaker 1: maybe just using your child as a bench press. Just

482
00:29:33,800 --> 00:29:36,040
Speaker 1: bench press your child, incorporate if the child is taking

483
00:29:36,120 --> 00:29:38,600
Speaker 1: up so much of your time, incorporate the child into

484
00:29:38,600 --> 00:29:40,880
Speaker 1: your exercise. Gentlemen, Well, no, that is one of the

485
00:29:41,000 --> 00:29:43,040
Speaker 1: bicep curls with the child. There you go. If you've

486
00:29:43,040 --> 00:29:47,720
Speaker 1: got twin babies. Obviously auto padded surface g I c

487
00:29:48,440 --> 00:29:50,000
Speaker 1: um no. But one of the one of the tips

488
00:29:50,120 --> 00:29:52,920
Speaker 1: was just play with your kids because that knocks out

489
00:29:53,200 --> 00:29:56,200
Speaker 1: increased family time and also gives you a little bit

490
00:29:56,400 --> 00:30:01,800
Speaker 1: of exercise. So here we're here to help. Yeah, that's

491
00:30:01,800 --> 00:30:04,840
Speaker 1: what we're doing. Yeah, and I do think that. Um

492
00:30:06,200 --> 00:30:08,280
Speaker 1: the fact that there are so many apps out there too,

493
00:30:08,480 --> 00:30:12,280
Speaker 1: especially for people who want to start exercising more, that

494
00:30:12,400 --> 00:30:15,720
Speaker 1: will give you reminders keeping some kind of accountability something

495
00:30:15,760 --> 00:30:19,120
Speaker 1: that's often cited as well as a good thing to do.

496
00:30:19,520 --> 00:30:22,440
Speaker 1: So this this sounds like if I want to get

497
00:30:22,480 --> 00:30:25,520
Speaker 1: back in the resolution game, I should make a resolution

498
00:30:25,640 --> 00:30:30,600
Speaker 1: along the lines of get moving a little bit every day. Yeah,

499
00:30:30,760 --> 00:30:33,760
Speaker 1: so in going from nothing, going from walking from my

500
00:30:33,920 --> 00:30:37,400
Speaker 1: car to my apartment, take a walk at three o'clock

501
00:30:37,680 --> 00:30:39,840
Speaker 1: when I'm starting to feel tired at work. Yeah, it's

502
00:30:39,880 --> 00:30:42,360
Speaker 1: the whole thing about taking the stairs instead of the

503
00:30:42,440 --> 00:30:46,520
Speaker 1: elevator one day at a time. Like for for me, uh,

504
00:30:46,760 --> 00:30:50,480
Speaker 1: like I want to save money this year, and instead

505
00:30:50,600 --> 00:30:52,400
Speaker 1: of what I've done in the past of saying by

506
00:30:52,440 --> 00:30:53,600
Speaker 1: the end of this year, I want to have a

507
00:30:53,680 --> 00:30:56,120
Speaker 1: million dollars. Now, I'm not gonna happen. There's no way.

508
00:30:56,680 --> 00:31:01,920
Speaker 1: Uh actually saying okay each week. Yeah, breaking it down, well,

509
00:31:01,960 --> 00:31:04,040
Speaker 1: I've also in terms of money, like, I've also set

510
00:31:04,120 --> 00:31:05,760
Speaker 1: an amount every month that I'm going to put in

511
00:31:05,840 --> 00:31:08,480
Speaker 1: savings and never touch again, because I actually am working

512
00:31:08,560 --> 00:31:11,040
Speaker 1: towards a goal of buying a car, like I have

513
00:31:11,240 --> 00:31:14,560
Speaker 1: to get rid of my old, dying, noisy car, and

514
00:31:14,800 --> 00:31:16,920
Speaker 1: so I just have to be disciplined about that. But

515
00:31:17,920 --> 00:31:21,520
Speaker 1: I do still let myself go out, Sure, have a drink,

516
00:31:21,800 --> 00:31:24,560
Speaker 1: have a Hamburger, gosie, friends, that kind of thing. I

517
00:31:24,640 --> 00:31:27,800
Speaker 1: don't completely deprive myself of any social interaction that involves

518
00:31:27,880 --> 00:31:30,120
Speaker 1: leaving the house because I would go insane and then

519
00:31:30,160 --> 00:31:32,480
Speaker 1: I would money binge and buy all of the shoes.

520
00:31:34,000 --> 00:31:37,520
Speaker 1: So buy all the shoes now. So New Year's resolutions

521
00:31:37,840 --> 00:31:41,959
Speaker 1: do they work? Oftentimes? No, But it's just because well

522
00:31:42,040 --> 00:31:46,160
Speaker 1: not just because, but I would say largely because we

523
00:31:46,320 --> 00:31:49,760
Speaker 1: go about them the wrong way. Yeah, it's it's almost

524
00:31:49,800 --> 00:31:52,120
Speaker 1: sort of a desperation move, like, oh my god, I

525
00:31:52,280 --> 00:31:55,680
Speaker 1: was not responsible with film the blank, and I need

526
00:31:55,760 --> 00:31:59,560
Speaker 1: to suddenly backtrack and reverse. However, many months of damage.

527
00:32:00,160 --> 00:32:03,120
Speaker 1: Whereas it might seem hard, but in the long run,

528
00:32:03,160 --> 00:32:06,000
Speaker 1: it's easier to make that lifestyle change and be kind

529
00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:09,240
Speaker 1: to yourself. Yeah, that's a good message, be kind to yourself.

530
00:32:12,960 --> 00:32:18,400
Speaker 1: And hey, that still stands in keep being kind to yourself. Yeah, Caroline,

531
00:32:18,440 --> 00:32:20,520
Speaker 1: I think of all of the resolutions, be kind to

532
00:32:20,600 --> 00:32:24,920
Speaker 1: yourself is one that is doable. Yeah, we can. We

533
00:32:25,000 --> 00:32:26,800
Speaker 1: can do that, right. Sure, we might have to work

534
00:32:26,840 --> 00:32:29,000
Speaker 1: at it. You know. I think it's easy to beat

535
00:32:29,000 --> 00:32:32,160
Speaker 1: ourselves up sometimes, but just as it's important to be

536
00:32:32,280 --> 00:32:35,360
Speaker 1: kind to your fellow human, be nice to yourself too.

537
00:32:35,560 --> 00:32:37,880
Speaker 1: And you know what, I'm going to resolve to have

538
00:32:39,120 --> 00:32:43,120
Speaker 1: the best podcasts ever in two thousand and fourteen. Yes, So,

539
00:32:43,400 --> 00:32:47,520
Speaker 1: if you have any podcast suggestions that you would like

540
00:32:47,720 --> 00:32:51,600
Speaker 1: us to tackle in this upcoming year, now is the

541
00:32:51,760 --> 00:32:54,920
Speaker 1: time to let us know, because we have some exciting

542
00:32:55,000 --> 00:32:57,320
Speaker 1: things right around the corner. Not only is it a

543
00:32:57,400 --> 00:33:01,080
Speaker 1: whole new year of all new podcast topics that we

544
00:33:01,200 --> 00:33:04,880
Speaker 1: want to get your insight on, but we have the

545
00:33:05,040 --> 00:33:08,760
Speaker 1: launch of a very special website where all of the

546
00:33:08,880 --> 00:33:14,280
Speaker 1: podcast goodness will have a home. That's right, I'm talking

547
00:33:14,320 --> 00:33:18,360
Speaker 1: to stuff, mom, never told you. Website coming out very soon,

548
00:33:19,320 --> 00:33:24,760
Speaker 1: So stay tuned for that, and don't forget also to

549
00:33:25,040 --> 00:33:29,360
Speaker 1: send us your podcast episode suggestions for two thousand fourteen.

550
00:33:29,800 --> 00:33:32,960
Speaker 1: Happy New Year, everybody, Let's really kick it off with

551
00:33:33,160 --> 00:33:38,120
Speaker 1: some awesome episodes requested by you. You can email them

552
00:33:38,240 --> 00:33:41,360
Speaker 1: to us at mom Stuff at Discovery dot com. You

553
00:33:41,400 --> 00:33:44,680
Speaker 1: can tweet us at mom Stuff Podcast, you can message

554
00:33:44,720 --> 00:33:46,640
Speaker 1: us on Facebook, and while you're at it, you can

555
00:33:46,680 --> 00:33:48,920
Speaker 1: follow us on Tumblr at stuff mom Never Told You

556
00:33:49,000 --> 00:33:52,000
Speaker 1: dot tumbler dot com. You can check out our New

557
00:33:52,160 --> 00:33:55,440
Speaker 1: Year's photos on Instagram at stuff mom Never Told You,

558
00:33:55,920 --> 00:33:58,840
Speaker 1: and you can also check out our vast library of

559
00:33:58,920 --> 00:34:02,440
Speaker 1: stuff I've Never Told You videos, all on YouTube dot com,

560
00:34:02,640 --> 00:34:05,720
Speaker 1: slash stuff Mom Never Told You, and don't forget to

561
00:34:05,920 --> 00:34:13,040
Speaker 1: subscribe for more on this and thousands of other topics.

562
00:34:13,320 --> 00:34:14,640
Speaker 1: Is it how stuff Works dot com