1 00:00:01,639 --> 00:00:08,360 Speaker 1: Hi, I am Kate Hudson and my name is Oliver Hudson. 2 00:00:08,520 --> 00:00:11,880 Speaker 1: We wanted to do something that highlighted our relationship and 3 00:00:11,880 --> 00:00:23,360 Speaker 1: what it's like to be siblings. We are a sibling, Railvalie. No, no, sibling, 4 00:00:25,200 --> 00:00:40,360 Speaker 1: don't do that with your mouth, revelry. That's good. Should 5 00:00:40,360 --> 00:00:44,040 Speaker 1: we refill the rose so that we don't have to 6 00:00:44,080 --> 00:00:49,840 Speaker 1: get after the conversation. No, we can refill the rose. 7 00:00:51,360 --> 00:00:57,760 Speaker 1: The rose is refilled, and we're back Aaron Bartlett and 8 00:00:57,800 --> 00:01:02,440 Speaker 1: Oliver Hudson back at it again. We had a brief 9 00:01:02,480 --> 00:01:12,280 Speaker 1: intermission with a voicemail listener appreciation episode, and now we're 10 00:01:12,319 --> 00:01:16,680 Speaker 1: back at it after two weeks. After two weeks, and 11 00:01:17,959 --> 00:01:23,800 Speaker 1: we were at an undisclosed location. Yeah, in Cape Cod 12 00:01:24,200 --> 00:01:29,319 Speaker 1: of Perfection. Yeah, it was great, such an amazing spot. 13 00:01:30,480 --> 00:01:39,000 Speaker 1: And now we're here in Albuquerque, New Mexico because I'm 14 00:01:39,000 --> 00:01:44,160 Speaker 1: doing a job, just starting it, and Aaron's here for 15 00:01:44,840 --> 00:01:52,120 Speaker 1: moral support. I'd probably lose my mind if she wasn't. 16 00:01:53,280 --> 00:01:58,240 Speaker 1: We came out our first two you know shows, I 17 00:01:58,280 --> 00:02:01,480 Speaker 1: guess it was pretty deep. We came out with it. 18 00:02:01,800 --> 00:02:03,680 Speaker 1: We came out hot, you know, so it's like, how 19 00:02:03,680 --> 00:02:07,360 Speaker 1: do you follow that? But today we wanted to sort 20 00:02:07,360 --> 00:02:12,040 Speaker 1: of talk about the in law experience. I was just 21 00:02:12,080 --> 00:02:14,240 Speaker 1: in mass so it was just on the cape with 22 00:02:14,320 --> 00:02:20,040 Speaker 1: her in laws, Brooks and Anne. And of course, you 23 00:02:20,080 --> 00:02:24,240 Speaker 1: know the first time Aaron, the first time you met, 24 00:02:24,720 --> 00:02:29,840 Speaker 1: the first time you met my parents parents was before 25 00:02:29,880 --> 00:02:34,600 Speaker 1: we were dating. Yeah, right, but then we were sort 26 00:02:34,600 --> 00:02:39,000 Speaker 1: of hooking up and I had like a morning morning 27 00:02:39,040 --> 00:02:42,040 Speaker 1: after a moment like walk of shame. Yeah, she had 28 00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:44,160 Speaker 1: a total walk of shame where she was because I 29 00:02:44,200 --> 00:02:50,280 Speaker 1: was living in Home twenty four and still living at 30 00:02:50,280 --> 00:02:55,080 Speaker 1: Home three or know you're twenty Yeah, no, you're just 31 00:02:55,160 --> 00:03:01,560 Speaker 1: turned twenty four. Yeah. Was that the night with Rob? No, 32 00:03:03,280 --> 00:03:07,400 Speaker 1: it was John, Yeah, I think it was the next Yeah, 33 00:03:07,480 --> 00:03:11,200 Speaker 1: we had a crazy night and Aaron gave it up. 34 00:03:11,880 --> 00:03:17,840 Speaker 1: You know, mm hmm. First time we hooked up, boom, 35 00:03:17,919 --> 00:03:21,240 Speaker 1: right out the gate. Just do you want to preface 36 00:03:21,240 --> 00:03:23,160 Speaker 1: it with anything about like a year and a half 37 00:03:23,160 --> 00:03:26,960 Speaker 1: of friendship, phone calls, flirting right out the gate, first 38 00:03:26,960 --> 00:03:31,919 Speaker 1: time we finally first time I hooked up, boom bang 39 00:03:32,919 --> 00:03:36,440 Speaker 1: boom bang, got a bang boom. Remember I was like 40 00:03:36,520 --> 00:03:38,200 Speaker 1: it was like six am, and I was like I'm 41 00:03:38,200 --> 00:03:39,960 Speaker 1: going to go, and you like grabbed me or like 42 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:42,240 Speaker 1: no you're not. It's like, yes I am. You're like, 43 00:03:42,280 --> 00:03:44,280 Speaker 1: no you're not. You like sat me up on the 44 00:03:44,320 --> 00:03:50,720 Speaker 1: sink in my bath, and then the rest is mystery bang. Anyways, 45 00:03:50,720 --> 00:03:51,839 Speaker 1: she had to do a little bit of a walk 46 00:03:51,880 --> 00:03:53,560 Speaker 1: of shame because she came down the stairs and who 47 00:03:53,600 --> 00:03:56,400 Speaker 1: is there? Your mom? My mom was there and say hi, honey, 48 00:03:58,280 --> 00:04:01,800 Speaker 1: And I was like, this is not how I planned 49 00:04:01,840 --> 00:04:05,520 Speaker 1: on this going well, staying on theme events, staying on 50 00:04:05,560 --> 00:04:07,520 Speaker 1: the theme of sort of in laws, you know. Well. 51 00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:10,480 Speaker 1: I also I thought, remember we were talking about it, 52 00:04:10,560 --> 00:04:16,000 Speaker 1: and our first podcast together kind of unfolded, not planned 53 00:04:16,080 --> 00:04:18,160 Speaker 1: a little naturally, and it was scary, but it was 54 00:04:18,360 --> 00:04:20,280 Speaker 1: very well received. And then we did a little follow 55 00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:24,600 Speaker 1: up episode and then I just thought, like what else 56 00:04:24,600 --> 00:04:26,680 Speaker 1: would people want to hear about, and like what would 57 00:04:26,720 --> 00:04:30,520 Speaker 1: be interesting because obviously, you know, we could talk about 58 00:04:30,600 --> 00:04:34,320 Speaker 1: us or whatever. There's things well set to stay relevant 59 00:04:34,360 --> 00:04:38,160 Speaker 1: to sort of not irrelevant, but just you know, we 60 00:04:38,240 --> 00:04:39,640 Speaker 1: just got off the cape. I was just with your 61 00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:42,039 Speaker 1: parents totally, you know what I mean, totally, And your 62 00:04:42,120 --> 00:04:44,560 Speaker 1: parents came to the cave. That's right, My parents came 63 00:04:44,600 --> 00:04:46,920 Speaker 1: to the cape. That's where we this idea because we 64 00:04:46,920 --> 00:04:49,760 Speaker 1: were like yeah, not only that, but people want people 65 00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:54,240 Speaker 1: are curious. Honestly, I'm not talking about listeners, but just 66 00:04:54,320 --> 00:04:57,640 Speaker 1: in general of like what it's like to come sort 67 00:04:57,680 --> 00:04:59,680 Speaker 1: of come into our family, you know, which is a 68 00:04:59,680 --> 00:05:05,279 Speaker 1: crazy fucking family totally twenty years trying to kind of 69 00:05:05,800 --> 00:05:07,960 Speaker 1: describe it and answer that question. And what's it like, 70 00:05:08,080 --> 00:05:10,760 Speaker 1: Goldie Han's your mother in law and you know, all 71 00:05:10,800 --> 00:05:12,920 Speaker 1: of these questions and I thought it would be kind 72 00:05:12,960 --> 00:05:19,520 Speaker 1: of an interesting fun episode to divulge a lot of well, well, 73 00:05:19,600 --> 00:05:25,560 Speaker 1: I mean honestly, in laws can break up, marriages, they 74 00:05:25,600 --> 00:05:28,200 Speaker 1: make a break. Marriages can make a break marriage. It's 75 00:05:28,240 --> 00:05:33,680 Speaker 1: the hardest thing for couples to deal with because people 76 00:05:33,720 --> 00:05:36,200 Speaker 1: can evolve, people can change. I know a lot of 77 00:05:36,240 --> 00:05:38,960 Speaker 1: people don't think that, but they can. You can grow 78 00:05:38,960 --> 00:05:42,320 Speaker 1: as a couple, you can grow individually. But one thing 79 00:05:42,400 --> 00:05:45,600 Speaker 1: that will never change and never go away is your 80 00:05:45,640 --> 00:05:49,560 Speaker 1: in laws. And so if you think if that is 81 00:05:49,560 --> 00:05:51,960 Speaker 1: a red flag in the beginning of your relationship, it 82 00:05:52,040 --> 00:05:56,920 Speaker 1: will always be there. Run because I mean, honestly, we 83 00:05:57,120 --> 00:06:01,000 Speaker 1: have friends, we have friends who know not breaking up, 84 00:06:01,040 --> 00:06:03,200 Speaker 1: but who have to deal with that. Yeah, it's been 85 00:06:03,279 --> 00:06:06,320 Speaker 1: and it's major, and what is it trickles down. Unfortunately, 86 00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:10,040 Speaker 1: it trickles down into your relationship, even if you don't 87 00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:13,160 Speaker 1: want it to. Because I think what happens is, you know, 88 00:06:13,800 --> 00:06:16,960 Speaker 1: you and your partner have a separate relationship, but the 89 00:06:17,120 --> 00:06:21,560 Speaker 1: minute in laws get involved, I think the natural instinct 90 00:06:22,320 --> 00:06:26,280 Speaker 1: is if if your partner is criticizing your in laws, 91 00:06:26,760 --> 00:06:29,680 Speaker 1: you may agree with your partner. I mean your partner 92 00:06:29,720 --> 00:06:33,160 Speaker 1: is criticizing your parents parents. Sorry, so let's just say, 93 00:06:33,240 --> 00:06:36,760 Speaker 1: for example, Oliver has a problem with my parents, and 94 00:06:37,760 --> 00:06:40,280 Speaker 1: I might even agree with him. But there's something that 95 00:06:40,360 --> 00:06:43,839 Speaker 1: I have seen and witness that goes down, which is 96 00:06:44,400 --> 00:06:47,240 Speaker 1: you almost want to like protect your family because it's 97 00:06:47,240 --> 00:06:49,320 Speaker 1: your family and it's your loyalty. So then it gets 98 00:06:49,320 --> 00:06:51,800 Speaker 1: a little sticky, and then you know you're trying to 99 00:06:51,839 --> 00:06:55,120 Speaker 1: please all these different people and different dynamics and layers, 100 00:06:55,120 --> 00:06:58,880 Speaker 1: and it's very complicated. And I always feel like that's 101 00:06:58,920 --> 00:07:01,919 Speaker 1: a really tough one because you can go to therapy 102 00:07:01,960 --> 00:07:05,240 Speaker 1: with your partner, you can ebb and flow with your partner, 103 00:07:05,240 --> 00:07:08,839 Speaker 1: but like in laws are there to stay, you should 104 00:07:08,880 --> 00:07:13,600 Speaker 1: have in law therapy. Therapy would be amazing because half 105 00:07:13,640 --> 00:07:16,040 Speaker 1: the time, I guarantee therapists are like, oh my God, 106 00:07:16,120 --> 00:07:20,120 Speaker 1: Like a huge part of my you know, clientele, you know, 107 00:07:20,240 --> 00:07:21,960 Speaker 1: is dealing with in laws. So anyways, we thought it 108 00:07:21,960 --> 00:07:25,680 Speaker 1: would be you probably have to just in order to 109 00:07:25,720 --> 00:07:28,960 Speaker 1: get through that. I mean sometimes you might just have 110 00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:31,880 Speaker 1: to say, look, it's just not on the table, like 111 00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:35,640 Speaker 1: we're doing our relationship, but oh I can't deal. What 112 00:07:35,680 --> 00:07:38,000 Speaker 1: happens is you're dealing with you can't deal. But you 113 00:07:38,040 --> 00:07:39,840 Speaker 1: have no fucking choice. You have no choice, You have 114 00:07:39,840 --> 00:07:43,640 Speaker 1: no choice. But then you're dealing with generation, you know, generationally, 115 00:07:43,800 --> 00:07:48,160 Speaker 1: like how traditions and things and people and now here's 116 00:07:48,160 --> 00:07:53,000 Speaker 1: the thing also also like traditions, great great point, you know, 117 00:07:53,160 --> 00:07:57,400 Speaker 1: like Christmas, holidays, holidays and where you're going and whose 118 00:07:57,640 --> 00:08:01,440 Speaker 1: place and whose house. I've sort of like my families 119 00:08:01,560 --> 00:08:05,160 Speaker 1: usurped holidays. But the thing is it's different. So getting 120 00:08:05,160 --> 00:08:08,560 Speaker 1: into our situation just a little bit, we don't we're 121 00:08:08,600 --> 00:08:11,720 Speaker 1: so lucky. No, no no, no, we hit the hit the Yeah, 122 00:08:12,840 --> 00:08:16,120 Speaker 1: that's extremely lucky. I think have this conversation and talk 123 00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:21,040 Speaker 1: about it because a we're not, you know, unaware of 124 00:08:21,680 --> 00:08:26,240 Speaker 1: how difficult it is and how lucky we are. But 125 00:08:26,280 --> 00:08:29,840 Speaker 1: I think there's a level of interest because you know, 126 00:08:29,880 --> 00:08:33,280 Speaker 1: you get married and you think, okay, raising kids is 127 00:08:33,280 --> 00:08:35,800 Speaker 1: going to be your biggest challenge, and it is usually 128 00:08:36,600 --> 00:08:39,079 Speaker 1: that's the biggest thing that people face, kind of how 129 00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:41,880 Speaker 1: are we raising them? Making choices, all that kind of shit. 130 00:08:42,520 --> 00:08:45,320 Speaker 1: But there's always that background of in laws, because there is, 131 00:08:46,559 --> 00:08:50,079 Speaker 1: you know, just that's our next episode is raising kids, honestly, 132 00:08:50,080 --> 00:08:53,640 Speaker 1: because it all, it all, it all factors in because 133 00:08:53,679 --> 00:08:58,440 Speaker 1: your parents inform how you want to raise your kids 134 00:08:57,800 --> 00:09:01,160 Speaker 1: or not raising my parents in fum how I want 135 00:09:01,160 --> 00:09:03,600 Speaker 1: to raise our kids. And we have to come together 136 00:09:03,679 --> 00:09:09,920 Speaker 1: with our different backgrounds and our different ideas and so differently. 137 00:09:10,120 --> 00:09:16,280 Speaker 1: Oh my god, but the core of family values meaning 138 00:09:16,400 --> 00:09:19,239 Speaker 1: family kind of came, you know, it was very important 139 00:09:19,320 --> 00:09:22,160 Speaker 1: theme and having fun and being together and like at 140 00:09:22,200 --> 00:09:26,719 Speaker 1: the root of it, there were definitely similarities. There was happiness, 141 00:09:27,160 --> 00:09:31,280 Speaker 1: you know, there was you know, joy and certain things, 142 00:09:31,320 --> 00:09:34,800 Speaker 1: but like Long Meadow, Oh well, god, I mean but 143 00:09:35,120 --> 00:09:37,600 Speaker 1: not I mean, I came from a divorced family. My 144 00:09:37,640 --> 00:09:41,000 Speaker 1: parents are high school sweethearts. It's just it doesn't Let's 145 00:09:41,040 --> 00:09:44,640 Speaker 1: start with Anna Brooks. Yeah, my parents grew up in 146 00:09:44,679 --> 00:09:48,720 Speaker 1: a small town south of Boston, knew each other their 147 00:09:48,760 --> 00:09:53,480 Speaker 1: whole life, began dating in high school, stayed together, got 148 00:09:53,520 --> 00:09:56,720 Speaker 1: married very young, had me at twenty five, my brother 149 00:09:56,760 --> 00:10:02,120 Speaker 1: at twenty seven, and they are still together and you know, 150 00:10:02,160 --> 00:10:04,840 Speaker 1: one of the greatest couples that I know. I mean, 151 00:10:05,200 --> 00:10:08,440 Speaker 1: they are opposites that attract so like, you know, they 152 00:10:08,960 --> 00:10:12,240 Speaker 1: definitely have their differences, but it works, and they've created 153 00:10:12,280 --> 00:10:15,720 Speaker 1: such an incredible partnership. And I think, well, your dad 154 00:10:15,800 --> 00:10:19,120 Speaker 1: is a saint. No, I mean, I mean he's the 155 00:10:19,120 --> 00:10:24,160 Speaker 1: most beautiful human being ever. And your mom there's probably 156 00:10:24,200 --> 00:10:27,120 Speaker 1: no one, no one more I would want to hang 157 00:10:27,160 --> 00:10:29,000 Speaker 1: out with than your mom. You know, we used to 158 00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:32,920 Speaker 1: smoke together. We both don't smoke cigarettes anymore, but we used. 159 00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:35,079 Speaker 1: I mean she was like my girl, Like we would 160 00:10:35,080 --> 00:10:37,520 Speaker 1: go out on the porch, have our cocktails and just 161 00:10:37,559 --> 00:10:41,320 Speaker 1: smoke a thousand cigarettes and just talk shit. She is 162 00:10:41,400 --> 00:10:45,280 Speaker 1: pisson vinegar and is straight up tell you how it 163 00:10:45,400 --> 00:10:49,800 Speaker 1: is noble shit and it's just Yes, my parents are 164 00:10:49,800 --> 00:10:51,880 Speaker 1: in love with your parents, by the way, on a 165 00:10:51,960 --> 00:10:55,240 Speaker 1: side note, like their best. That's another thing that we 166 00:10:55,320 --> 00:10:59,920 Speaker 1: got lucky. I mean that normally doesn't happen, but yes, 167 00:11:00,000 --> 00:11:02,800 Speaker 1: they were high school sweethearts. I mean, you know, your 168 00:11:02,800 --> 00:11:08,000 Speaker 1: mom hasn't seen another penis besides the one Penisa, that's it, 169 00:11:08,080 --> 00:11:10,200 Speaker 1: and my brother's that she was changing. I'm sure there's 170 00:11:10,200 --> 00:11:13,080 Speaker 1: been some others flashed along the way, but she hasn't. 171 00:11:13,120 --> 00:11:17,000 Speaker 1: You know your dad high school? It was early sixties. 172 00:11:17,000 --> 00:11:18,559 Speaker 1: I mean, it was a different time. I always say 173 00:11:18,559 --> 00:11:20,200 Speaker 1: that to Brooks because Brooks and I have like, you know, 174 00:11:20,320 --> 00:11:23,640 Speaker 1: very open way we have what yeah, but okay, this 175 00:11:23,760 --> 00:11:26,720 Speaker 1: is okay, I will. She's giving me a look like 176 00:11:26,760 --> 00:11:28,200 Speaker 1: you don't want me to no, But I was going 177 00:11:28,280 --> 00:11:30,319 Speaker 1: to say the story was in high school, and my 178 00:11:30,400 --> 00:11:34,080 Speaker 1: mom would tell this story too, that basically, you know, 179 00:11:34,200 --> 00:11:36,960 Speaker 1: dating my dad, he was a grade older and very 180 00:11:37,040 --> 00:11:39,920 Speaker 1: charming and kind of you know, mister popular, whatever you 181 00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:42,400 Speaker 1: want to say. And he would drop my mom off 182 00:11:42,440 --> 00:11:46,040 Speaker 1: because she had a curfew and then head out afterwards 183 00:11:46,040 --> 00:11:49,360 Speaker 1: to the d Q, to the dairy queen and like 184 00:11:49,920 --> 00:11:52,960 Speaker 1: you know, still flirt and do his thing and whatnot. 185 00:11:53,040 --> 00:11:55,080 Speaker 1: My mom I remember telling me some crazy stories. She 186 00:11:55,120 --> 00:11:57,760 Speaker 1: was in the bathroom in high school and she was 187 00:11:57,760 --> 00:12:00,120 Speaker 1: in a stall and she heard two girls come and 188 00:12:00,280 --> 00:12:02,440 Speaker 1: talking at the sink something like blah blah blah. And 189 00:12:02,440 --> 00:12:05,280 Speaker 1: I was with Brooks Barlette at the DQ last night, 190 00:12:05,360 --> 00:12:07,240 Speaker 1: and this and that, and she came out of the 191 00:12:07,280 --> 00:12:10,240 Speaker 1: door washing your hands, and she looked at them and said, 192 00:12:10,760 --> 00:12:12,839 Speaker 1: hope you had fun last night, but I'm going to 193 00:12:12,880 --> 00:12:15,200 Speaker 1: marry him, and like walked out the door and like 194 00:12:16,120 --> 00:12:20,520 Speaker 1: I always thought, like that's incredibly you know, bold and 195 00:12:20,559 --> 00:12:22,800 Speaker 1: confident and amazing, and she did, and it was like 196 00:12:23,080 --> 00:12:26,160 Speaker 1: have fun, do your thing, but like he's mine kind 197 00:12:26,200 --> 00:12:29,240 Speaker 1: of a vibe. Yeah, and you know still to this 198 00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:35,160 Speaker 1: day he is so in love and always catering in 199 00:12:35,200 --> 00:12:38,680 Speaker 1: an affectionate and you know, they you know, feels like 200 00:12:38,880 --> 00:12:42,160 Speaker 1: he hit the you know, jackpot So and getting into 201 00:12:42,200 --> 00:12:44,960 Speaker 1: our situation at the in laws. So we started dating. 202 00:12:45,800 --> 00:12:48,240 Speaker 1: And we were dating I don't know, three or four months, 203 00:12:48,600 --> 00:12:52,760 Speaker 1: I think, because it was February. Yeah, yeah, no, no, 204 00:12:52,840 --> 00:12:55,959 Speaker 1: But then then you said to me like I want 205 00:12:56,000 --> 00:12:59,360 Speaker 1: you to come back and be my parents, and I 206 00:12:59,400 --> 00:13:01,520 Speaker 1: didn't want to go. Right. We talked about this last 207 00:13:01,559 --> 00:13:03,679 Speaker 1: time to the Cape. To the Cape because you had 208 00:13:03,720 --> 00:13:07,760 Speaker 1: just taken your previous boyfriend there the year before all 209 00:13:07,800 --> 00:13:09,360 Speaker 1: of them, you were just one of me. Yeah, I 210 00:13:09,360 --> 00:13:12,280 Speaker 1: didn't want to be that guy the next year to 211 00:13:12,360 --> 00:13:14,920 Speaker 1: comment says that I'm not going not doing that. So 212 00:13:14,960 --> 00:13:19,040 Speaker 1: I took someone else and we had a grade summer. No, 213 00:13:19,120 --> 00:13:21,280 Speaker 1: but then you did come to Florida. Then I came 214 00:13:21,360 --> 00:13:23,800 Speaker 1: to Florida. Then I was like, all right, we're all in, 215 00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:27,800 Speaker 1: we're in love. It's time to meet your parents. And 216 00:13:28,160 --> 00:13:31,160 Speaker 1: they were living in Tampa at the time, and we 217 00:13:31,320 --> 00:13:35,000 Speaker 1: show up and it was immediate connection. Yeah. I mean, 218 00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:38,760 Speaker 1: my dad had known about you for a long time. 219 00:13:39,040 --> 00:13:41,680 Speaker 1: I mean, you know, my parents knew kind of the 220 00:13:41,720 --> 00:13:44,880 Speaker 1: whole meeting. And I said in our friendship and our 221 00:13:44,880 --> 00:13:47,280 Speaker 1: flirtations and this and then that we were together, and 222 00:13:47,320 --> 00:13:49,240 Speaker 1: so there was you know, yeah, I mean, we have 223 00:13:49,280 --> 00:13:52,480 Speaker 1: a famous picture the first night that I met your parents. 224 00:13:52,760 --> 00:13:56,840 Speaker 1: Your dad got a limo and we were drinking Weak 225 00:13:57,000 --> 00:14:01,440 Speaker 1: to Burn steakhouse. You just got hammer like nineteen bottles 226 00:14:01,440 --> 00:14:04,080 Speaker 1: of l Yeah. And the first picture we ever took Brooks, 227 00:14:04,200 --> 00:14:06,680 Speaker 1: her dad, Brooks and I took. I had a cigarette 228 00:14:06,679 --> 00:14:08,679 Speaker 1: in one side of the mouth and joint in the 229 00:14:08,720 --> 00:14:11,840 Speaker 1: other side of my mouth that he provided, I know, 230 00:14:12,080 --> 00:14:15,640 Speaker 1: by the way, I know I also have another with 231 00:14:15,720 --> 00:14:19,040 Speaker 1: Brooks that same night of you guys in the bathroom 232 00:14:19,120 --> 00:14:22,080 Speaker 1: at like the men's like stalls or whatever they're called, 233 00:14:22,080 --> 00:14:24,840 Speaker 1: the urinals, and I said hey, and you both turned 234 00:14:24,880 --> 00:14:27,040 Speaker 1: around over your shoulder. I mean it's like a classic 235 00:14:27,760 --> 00:14:29,720 Speaker 1: picture and there you guys are. I mean, that's what 236 00:14:29,840 --> 00:14:33,600 Speaker 1: I was. That weird purpose that I love that you 237 00:14:33,640 --> 00:14:35,760 Speaker 1: had like a rose colored one too. I had that 238 00:14:35,840 --> 00:14:38,920 Speaker 1: from my guy to becoming a rock star. That's my wardrobe. 239 00:14:41,680 --> 00:14:44,920 Speaker 1: But anyways, getting back to you know, kind of the 240 00:14:44,960 --> 00:14:47,960 Speaker 1: differences of our upbringing and our in laws, meaning I 241 00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:53,600 Speaker 1: had high school sweethearts, still married, small town you know, 242 00:14:54,240 --> 00:14:57,160 Speaker 1: growing up, and then you have, of course too, you know, 243 00:14:57,440 --> 00:15:01,600 Speaker 1: icon status movie stars. U both divorced, you know what 244 00:15:01,640 --> 00:15:04,880 Speaker 1: I mean, Like you're a child of divorce, like all 245 00:15:04,920 --> 00:15:08,800 Speaker 1: of those things. You know, we couldn't be more different 246 00:15:09,440 --> 00:15:12,240 Speaker 1: when it comes to that. And then you know, you 247 00:15:12,360 --> 00:15:17,280 Speaker 1: throw in just kind of their backgrounds and you know 248 00:15:17,440 --> 00:15:20,960 Speaker 1: your dad and then you know Kurt has season and 249 00:15:21,040 --> 00:15:23,480 Speaker 1: his ex and you know, there was just a lot, 250 00:15:24,120 --> 00:15:28,560 Speaker 1: a lot of baggage. But ultimately, I say this all 251 00:15:28,600 --> 00:15:32,680 Speaker 1: the time, I'm like, Kurt is originally from Maine and 252 00:15:33,360 --> 00:15:36,840 Speaker 1: born in Springfield, Massachusetts, which is even crazier because that's 253 00:15:36,880 --> 00:15:39,600 Speaker 1: basically the tiny, you know, town next door to where 254 00:15:39,600 --> 00:15:42,040 Speaker 1: I grew up. And then your mom is from Maryland, 255 00:15:42,320 --> 00:15:46,480 Speaker 1: So there are these East Coast roots that I think 256 00:15:47,520 --> 00:15:50,160 Speaker 1: our parents kind of connect on in a way. There's 257 00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:53,440 Speaker 1: a there's a familiarity and I think for your parents, 258 00:15:53,520 --> 00:15:56,960 Speaker 1: what I'll say is, yes, they're these huge you know, 259 00:15:57,720 --> 00:16:02,280 Speaker 1: icons and movie stars, and but they didn't you know, 260 00:16:03,480 --> 00:16:05,520 Speaker 1: like kind of come from that, I guess, And so 261 00:16:05,600 --> 00:16:07,960 Speaker 1: there's a comfort or of familiarity when they are with 262 00:16:08,040 --> 00:16:11,360 Speaker 1: my parents. There's a feeling of oh my gosh, we 263 00:16:11,440 --> 00:16:17,280 Speaker 1: can be normal and we're you know, there's I don't 264 00:16:17,320 --> 00:16:18,960 Speaker 1: know how to explain it, but I think there's just 265 00:16:19,040 --> 00:16:24,160 Speaker 1: a comfort in that normalcy or familiarity. Right. Well, they 266 00:16:24,200 --> 00:16:27,200 Speaker 1: also just love how real. Yeah, and my parents are 267 00:16:27,720 --> 00:16:30,520 Speaker 1: you know, my parents are New Englanders. They're classic kind 268 00:16:30,600 --> 00:16:34,800 Speaker 1: of you know, just easy to be around, like happy 269 00:16:34,840 --> 00:16:37,960 Speaker 1: to have a good time and have a cocktail and 270 00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:41,960 Speaker 1: you know, have good conversation and you know, so they're 271 00:16:42,000 --> 00:16:46,160 Speaker 1: definitely easy to be around. But imagine you know, me 272 00:16:46,320 --> 00:16:49,280 Speaker 1: calling and saying like so, you know, well how did 273 00:16:49,360 --> 00:16:52,160 Speaker 1: that work? So you know, it's different. We have a 274 00:16:52,160 --> 00:16:56,560 Speaker 1: bigger family. We have Thanksgivings and Christmases that are sort 275 00:16:56,560 --> 00:16:58,120 Speaker 1: of these big to dos. You know, you have a 276 00:16:58,160 --> 00:17:03,160 Speaker 1: smaller family. Yeah, very you know, back up, your Christmas 277 00:17:03,240 --> 00:17:06,399 Speaker 1: is well because here's the thing. Okay, at that point, 278 00:17:06,560 --> 00:17:10,520 Speaker 1: I was whatever twenty seven or something like that, twenty eight. 279 00:17:12,359 --> 00:17:15,360 Speaker 1: You know, my brother was, you know, in his mid twenties. 280 00:17:15,840 --> 00:17:19,080 Speaker 1: So Christmas looked like me just coming home and the 281 00:17:19,119 --> 00:17:21,040 Speaker 1: four of us would just hang out, and we were 282 00:17:21,080 --> 00:17:23,800 Speaker 1: just happy to like have dinner, you know, maybe go 283 00:17:23,840 --> 00:17:28,160 Speaker 1: out for like you know, Chinese food, and like order 284 00:17:28,200 --> 00:17:32,920 Speaker 1: pizzas in laugh Watch movies. We cooked on like Christmas Day, 285 00:17:33,119 --> 00:17:35,399 Speaker 1: you know, would make a big turkey and trade a 286 00:17:35,400 --> 00:17:39,440 Speaker 1: couple presents. But you know, we were down in Florida 287 00:17:39,480 --> 00:17:40,840 Speaker 1: at the time, so it's not even like I was 288 00:17:40,840 --> 00:17:43,600 Speaker 1: in Massachusetts, where if I was, I might have been 289 00:17:43,600 --> 00:17:45,800 Speaker 1: getting together with Jail and Dev and Len and Craig 290 00:17:45,840 --> 00:17:49,639 Speaker 1: and everybody, but we weren't, and I was in California, 291 00:17:49,640 --> 00:17:51,160 Speaker 1: so I was coming home, so it was more about 292 00:17:51,200 --> 00:17:53,320 Speaker 1: just the four of us being together. Didn't really matter. 293 00:17:54,320 --> 00:17:58,119 Speaker 1: So then it was you know, you and your family 294 00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:00,480 Speaker 1: were going to Colorado, and it was kind of a 295 00:18:00,520 --> 00:18:07,080 Speaker 1: really big traditional to do baby cousins, you know, aunts, uncles, 296 00:18:07,600 --> 00:18:11,840 Speaker 1: very festive, and then I remember you saying like, would 297 00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:14,159 Speaker 1: you ever you know, want to stay and come and 298 00:18:14,160 --> 00:18:18,359 Speaker 1: do Christmas with us? And for me, it wasn't about 299 00:18:18,359 --> 00:18:20,760 Speaker 1: like Christmas Day and like missing that with my family. 300 00:18:20,800 --> 00:18:22,720 Speaker 1: It was more just my time to be with them. 301 00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:25,640 Speaker 1: So then what I did was the first couple of years, 302 00:18:25,680 --> 00:18:27,640 Speaker 1: I did Christmas with my family and then I flew 303 00:18:27,680 --> 00:18:33,280 Speaker 1: to do New Year's with you yeah, and Thanksgiving, Thanksgiving 304 00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:35,560 Speaker 1: I can't remember. I went back a couple of years, 305 00:18:35,560 --> 00:18:38,359 Speaker 1: but then I started. Yeah once we were later on, 306 00:18:38,520 --> 00:18:41,919 Speaker 1: but my parents were like, it was less about the 307 00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:44,480 Speaker 1: tradition of Christmas. It was more just like, that's a 308 00:18:44,520 --> 00:18:46,600 Speaker 1: time for us to hang out. So as long as 309 00:18:46,680 --> 00:18:50,159 Speaker 1: I had that time with them, that worked out. We 310 00:18:50,200 --> 00:18:53,439 Speaker 1: got lucky. So it wasn't really like choosing. Yeah, we 311 00:18:53,520 --> 00:18:55,920 Speaker 1: got so lucky because there's so many couples who were 312 00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:59,119 Speaker 1: like have to sacrifice their tradition Thanksgiving with one and 313 00:18:59,280 --> 00:19:01,560 Speaker 1: Christmas with an other, you know, I mean that would 314 00:19:01,600 --> 00:19:06,000 Speaker 1: make me crazy. I know it's hard, but I guess 315 00:19:06,080 --> 00:19:07,520 Speaker 1: that's just part of the part of the part of 316 00:19:07,560 --> 00:19:10,040 Speaker 1: the ball. We also lived cross country, you know, some 317 00:19:10,080 --> 00:19:12,280 Speaker 1: couples are not. I mean, you could be across town 318 00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:14,840 Speaker 1: and do like the morning with one family the evening 319 00:19:14,880 --> 00:19:17,480 Speaker 1: with another. It's just part of the deal. When you're 320 00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:23,080 Speaker 1: blending families. But we got very lucky, you know, in 321 00:19:23,160 --> 00:19:26,399 Speaker 1: that area. But I do remember that first year being like, 322 00:19:26,560 --> 00:19:31,320 Speaker 1: so I think I'm going to stay and they were like, great, 323 00:19:31,400 --> 00:19:33,920 Speaker 1: we get at your skiing you're in Colorado. It's gorgeous, 324 00:19:34,040 --> 00:19:38,120 Speaker 1: like be with your guy. And then you know they 325 00:19:38,119 --> 00:19:40,480 Speaker 1: came out to visit me, and you know, it just worked. 326 00:19:40,520 --> 00:19:51,919 Speaker 1: We got lucky with the flexibility Circara Oh Socara. 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So use code Sibling when you download the 374 00:22:43,080 --> 00:22:47,000 Speaker 1: app and let public dot Com know you're coming from 375 00:22:47,119 --> 00:22:50,159 Speaker 1: Sibling Revelry and you'll get up to fifty dollars in 376 00:22:50,320 --> 00:22:54,440 Speaker 1: free stock to get started in growing your portfolio. It's 377 00:22:54,480 --> 00:22:56,800 Speaker 1: Valve for US residents eighteen and over, a subject to 378 00:22:56,800 --> 00:23:02,080 Speaker 1: account approval. See Public dot Com slash disclosures. Not investment advice. 379 00:23:06,800 --> 00:23:08,919 Speaker 1: But I do remember, like my mom, you know the 380 00:23:08,920 --> 00:23:11,800 Speaker 1: first time that they were going to meet your parents, 381 00:23:13,320 --> 00:23:16,359 Speaker 1: because no matter how many times I tell what was 382 00:23:16,480 --> 00:23:21,119 Speaker 1: what about that? Like, well, here's the thing, you know, 383 00:23:21,720 --> 00:23:24,320 Speaker 1: whether it be like my best friends from home or 384 00:23:24,800 --> 00:23:30,280 Speaker 1: my parents, it is hard to explain that like Goldie 385 00:23:30,280 --> 00:23:35,720 Speaker 1: and Kurt are like Oliver's parents, right. And I learned 386 00:23:35,720 --> 00:23:38,080 Speaker 1: that really fast too, because I remember standing in the 387 00:23:38,119 --> 00:23:42,440 Speaker 1: kitchen that morning with like mascara, you know, like under 388 00:23:42,440 --> 00:23:45,840 Speaker 1: my eyes, trying to like clean myself up, and I'm 389 00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:48,040 Speaker 1: talking to Golden and I'm thinking, holy shit, I'm in 390 00:23:48,080 --> 00:23:52,040 Speaker 1: the kitchen with like Goldie Han, Like, oh my god, 391 00:23:52,080 --> 00:23:54,360 Speaker 1: is she going to make like some chicken pepperoni right now, 392 00:23:54,520 --> 00:24:00,760 Speaker 1: like Krista Garthy And but yet they're she was, And 393 00:24:00,800 --> 00:24:04,240 Speaker 1: I was like, oh my gosh, hold on, Like to me, 394 00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:08,320 Speaker 1: she's Goldie Han, but right now she's Allie's mom who's 395 00:24:08,320 --> 00:24:11,800 Speaker 1: in the kitchen, you know, making like probably biscuits and 396 00:24:11,840 --> 00:24:15,399 Speaker 1: gravy or something, you know, cute and fun. And so 397 00:24:16,359 --> 00:24:19,800 Speaker 1: there is this feeling that immediately you can switch into 398 00:24:19,840 --> 00:24:23,959 Speaker 1: that gear. It happens faster than you think. And then 399 00:24:24,000 --> 00:24:25,920 Speaker 1: the next couple of times, you know, it got easier, 400 00:24:25,960 --> 00:24:30,439 Speaker 1: and then you kind of start to realize like oh, yeah, like, 401 00:24:30,920 --> 00:24:34,280 Speaker 1: of course she's Goldie hon, but like she's also your mom. Yeah, 402 00:24:34,320 --> 00:24:38,560 Speaker 1: and so transition probably happens fairly quickly when you're hanging 403 00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:41,000 Speaker 1: out when you're with Well, I think it happened fairly 404 00:24:41,040 --> 00:24:43,480 Speaker 1: quickly for me only because I knew so much about 405 00:24:43,480 --> 00:24:47,040 Speaker 1: her from you and I. You know, there there is 406 00:24:47,080 --> 00:24:49,800 Speaker 1: a feeling of both of them when you meet them. 407 00:24:50,480 --> 00:24:53,520 Speaker 1: And this is what my parents said too. There's no heir, 408 00:24:53,640 --> 00:24:57,400 Speaker 1: there's no oh my gosh, you're meeting a celebrity there. 409 00:24:57,840 --> 00:25:00,640 Speaker 1: They are so much like oh my gosh, like we're 410 00:25:00,640 --> 00:25:03,600 Speaker 1: meeting Aaron's parents or oh my god, this is all 411 00:25:03,600 --> 00:25:06,280 Speaker 1: these new girl who's been talking about Like they don't 412 00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:11,199 Speaker 1: think they're movie stars or icons for that matter. I 413 00:25:11,200 --> 00:25:15,000 Speaker 1: mean literally, like your mom forgets like we're out talking 414 00:25:15,040 --> 00:25:17,640 Speaker 1: in public and she's, you know, talking all this stuff. 415 00:25:17,640 --> 00:25:18,879 Speaker 1: I'm like, do you want to maybe like just keep 416 00:25:18,920 --> 00:25:20,800 Speaker 1: it down a little, like the people next to us 417 00:25:20,800 --> 00:25:23,879 Speaker 1: are listening, and she's like, oh, I've forgotten any thanks. 418 00:25:23,920 --> 00:25:28,000 Speaker 1: I mean literally, it's like they don't, you know, notice 419 00:25:28,080 --> 00:25:30,840 Speaker 1: or think about it. So that's a very unique quality 420 00:25:30,880 --> 00:25:36,280 Speaker 1: I think for them. That's that's so you know, beautiful 421 00:25:36,400 --> 00:25:38,360 Speaker 1: to see but I think when they met my parents, 422 00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:42,120 Speaker 1: there was an excitement on their end that they're meeting 423 00:25:43,320 --> 00:25:46,639 Speaker 1: Aaron's parents. Like for them, they were as excited or 424 00:25:46,680 --> 00:25:50,080 Speaker 1: as curious. Well, it's also to see you know where 425 00:25:50,119 --> 00:25:55,240 Speaker 1: you came from. Oh totally, you know. Yeah, And I 426 00:25:55,280 --> 00:25:57,880 Speaker 1: mean that's the thing is you're with my family right 427 00:25:58,040 --> 00:26:01,960 Speaker 1: so much. You know, Well, we live in the same town. 428 00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:03,919 Speaker 1: We live a couple of streets away, so there is 429 00:26:03,960 --> 00:26:08,800 Speaker 1: that advantage. But she removed the cape. Yes, your parents 430 00:26:08,840 --> 00:26:13,080 Speaker 1: for the second half of our relationship. But don't tempt me. 431 00:26:16,200 --> 00:26:19,159 Speaker 1: But I will say, like, you know, one of the 432 00:26:19,160 --> 00:26:23,200 Speaker 1: first times I was having dinner with your parents, your mom, 433 00:26:24,000 --> 00:26:26,600 Speaker 1: you know, was so sweet, and she was going to cook, 434 00:26:29,560 --> 00:26:33,280 Speaker 1: and so she was cooking and she was going to 435 00:26:33,320 --> 00:26:36,840 Speaker 1: make scallops, and you know, she said it to Alie 436 00:26:36,920 --> 00:26:38,479 Speaker 1: and all I was like, yeah, it sounds great. And 437 00:26:38,520 --> 00:26:41,840 Speaker 1: of course he knows that. I mean, I like scallops now, 438 00:26:41,880 --> 00:26:44,240 Speaker 1: but at the time he knew I didn't like love, love, 439 00:26:44,320 --> 00:26:50,360 Speaker 1: seafood or scallops, like yeah, nothing, and you had no palette. 440 00:26:50,400 --> 00:26:59,199 Speaker 1: I mean, you had cheeseburgers, French fries, anything. Yeah. So 441 00:26:59,240 --> 00:27:01,040 Speaker 1: then of course he says to me oh, my mom 442 00:27:01,119 --> 00:27:04,359 Speaker 1: is making scallops and I'm like, oh, okay, like he 443 00:27:04,480 --> 00:27:06,879 Speaker 1: knows I don't like it. And he's like, should I 444 00:27:06,920 --> 00:27:09,280 Speaker 1: tell my mom? And I was like, no, what tell 445 00:27:09,320 --> 00:27:11,520 Speaker 1: her that I don't want scallops? And he's like yeah, 446 00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:14,119 Speaker 1: and I said, don't, I'll kill you. I was like, 447 00:27:14,160 --> 00:27:16,160 Speaker 1: I'll pretend. I'll have a few bites, like you can 448 00:27:16,200 --> 00:27:19,440 Speaker 1: eat mine, like just you know, like any normal good 449 00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:22,119 Speaker 1: partner would do. You would help and cover for me. 450 00:27:22,920 --> 00:27:26,200 Speaker 1: And of course we sit down, it's outside. She's cooked 451 00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:29,520 Speaker 1: this beautiful dinner and you know, done all of her stuff, 452 00:27:30,119 --> 00:27:32,200 Speaker 1: kind of thinking, oh, this is like our first sit 453 00:27:32,280 --> 00:27:34,160 Speaker 1: down with Erin, like we're going to get to talk 454 00:27:34,240 --> 00:27:35,840 Speaker 1: and meet. I mean we had met a few times, 455 00:27:35,880 --> 00:27:38,640 Speaker 1: but it was the real first, like do you want 456 00:27:38,680 --> 00:27:41,040 Speaker 1: to come to dinner with my parents? So we sit 457 00:27:41,119 --> 00:27:45,119 Speaker 1: down and Allie throws his fork and knife down like 458 00:27:45,119 --> 00:27:47,040 Speaker 1: like a sound, you know, on the table, and he's 459 00:27:47,040 --> 00:27:51,879 Speaker 1: like mom, and he was like, after she's served everybody, 460 00:27:51,920 --> 00:27:53,200 Speaker 1: we had it on the plate. And he's like, I 461 00:27:53,280 --> 00:27:57,080 Speaker 1: told you, Aaron doesn't like scallops. She doesn't eat seafood. 462 00:27:58,440 --> 00:28:00,280 Speaker 1: And he makes this you know, big scene and he's 463 00:28:00,320 --> 00:28:04,120 Speaker 1: like Oh my gosh, what honey, you didn't tell me that. 464 00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:07,600 Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. I'm literally like mortified. 465 00:28:07,640 --> 00:28:09,360 Speaker 1: I'm turning bright right, I'm like, babe, that's not true, 466 00:28:09,359 --> 00:28:11,119 Speaker 1: and he's like, yes, it is. Why are you lying? 467 00:28:11,280 --> 00:28:14,520 Speaker 1: Like tell her you don't like scallops? I mean literally 468 00:28:14,560 --> 00:28:16,600 Speaker 1: threw me under the bus, like right away. But it 469 00:28:16,720 --> 00:28:19,840 Speaker 1: set the tone for the you know, rest of our relationship, 470 00:28:19,920 --> 00:28:23,359 Speaker 1: our relationship because I was like, note to self, done 471 00:28:23,359 --> 00:28:29,879 Speaker 1: if you're truth. But it was an icebreaker and it 472 00:28:29,960 --> 00:28:32,240 Speaker 1: was really funny and she was so sweet, and you know, 473 00:28:32,359 --> 00:28:34,080 Speaker 1: of course I was like I'm gonna eat the scalps 474 00:28:34,119 --> 00:28:36,400 Speaker 1: and she's like it's okay, and like, you know, Kurt's like, yeah, 475 00:28:36,440 --> 00:28:38,400 Speaker 1: just be honest. If you don't like scalps, that's okay, 476 00:28:38,520 --> 00:28:40,880 Speaker 1: Like why are you hiding it? And I'm thinking, here's 477 00:28:40,880 --> 00:28:45,160 Speaker 1: a clash of like the most open, you know, honest, 478 00:28:45,200 --> 00:28:46,960 Speaker 1: say it like it is family. And then I come 479 00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:50,360 Speaker 1: from kind of like New England, polite, like people pleasing, 480 00:28:50,520 --> 00:28:52,840 Speaker 1: you know, background, where I was like I would never 481 00:28:52,880 --> 00:28:55,400 Speaker 1: want to like rock the boat. But needless to say, 482 00:28:55,400 --> 00:28:57,160 Speaker 1: I ate some of the scalps and they were really 483 00:28:57,160 --> 00:29:02,880 Speaker 1: good and then I think we out for pizza. Yeah, exactly, No, 484 00:29:03,120 --> 00:29:08,280 Speaker 1: I know. But and then our parents met, and I 485 00:29:08,280 --> 00:29:12,920 Speaker 1: think they stayed at my house. No, I mean no, 486 00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:15,800 Speaker 1: not the first time they met. They didn't. Not the 487 00:29:15,840 --> 00:29:17,720 Speaker 1: first time they met. They started doing that. Like now 488 00:29:17,720 --> 00:29:20,840 Speaker 1: they're like they clutch with their room rooms. I know, 489 00:29:21,040 --> 00:29:23,960 Speaker 1: I know they're cute. Yeah, I mean, look, my parents, 490 00:29:24,240 --> 00:29:27,520 Speaker 1: I think for them, obviously, as anyone can understand, they're 491 00:29:27,560 --> 00:29:31,000 Speaker 1: like coming in to meet you know, Goldenhound and Carrussele 492 00:29:31,080 --> 00:29:34,840 Speaker 1: like it's a big deal. But knowing you, I think 493 00:29:34,880 --> 00:29:38,120 Speaker 1: they just felt at ease, thinking like all right, you 494 00:29:38,160 --> 00:29:41,240 Speaker 1: know he's so great, like they've got to be pretty great. 495 00:29:41,360 --> 00:29:44,560 Speaker 1: And then you know, they just really hit it off. 496 00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:47,200 Speaker 1: I mean, my mom and your mom couldn't be more opposites. 497 00:29:47,560 --> 00:29:50,800 Speaker 1: Yet they just find the best in each other. They 498 00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:53,600 Speaker 1: find the things that work, and that's what I love. 499 00:29:54,240 --> 00:29:57,400 Speaker 1: I know. You know, it's like, I know, my parents 500 00:29:57,400 --> 00:30:01,120 Speaker 1: came to the Cape, they gave and they stayed with 501 00:30:01,200 --> 00:30:04,400 Speaker 1: your parents in their little condo. Yeah, and of course, 502 00:30:04,440 --> 00:30:06,520 Speaker 1: you know, my parents like on this beautiful house at 503 00:30:06,520 --> 00:30:08,280 Speaker 1: the Cape and they downsized a couple of years ago. 504 00:30:08,360 --> 00:30:11,000 Speaker 1: My mom's like my parents love they left it. My 505 00:30:11,000 --> 00:30:12,479 Speaker 1: mom was like, oh my god, they're coming to like 506 00:30:12,480 --> 00:30:15,600 Speaker 1: our little condo. Meanwhile, they were like, it was the 507 00:30:15,640 --> 00:30:17,880 Speaker 1: greatest three days. We want to come back. Oh yeah, 508 00:30:18,480 --> 00:30:20,720 Speaker 1: I mean it was so great. It was so cute, 509 00:30:20,760 --> 00:30:25,440 Speaker 1: you know, it was so great. Yeah. You know, our upbringings, 510 00:30:26,720 --> 00:30:31,120 Speaker 1: you know, we're so vastly different. And then we get together, 511 00:30:31,200 --> 00:30:37,560 Speaker 1: and then we have children and you take, you know, 512 00:30:37,640 --> 00:30:40,240 Speaker 1: certain things from your childhood that you want to emulate. 513 00:30:41,200 --> 00:30:46,000 Speaker 1: You know, you you had this idyllic childhood in this 514 00:30:46,160 --> 00:30:49,640 Speaker 1: small town of Long Meadow where it was almost like 515 00:30:49,680 --> 00:30:51,880 Speaker 1: a movie, you know, it wasn't real. And I was 516 00:30:51,920 --> 00:30:55,840 Speaker 1: in LA you know, at sixteen, like going to clubs. 517 00:30:57,520 --> 00:31:00,560 Speaker 1: I'm going to like friendlies on a half day O'Connor's 518 00:31:00,640 --> 00:31:03,120 Speaker 1: basement with like you know, no, I know. And then 519 00:31:03,160 --> 00:31:06,760 Speaker 1: we have our kids, and you know, you want to 520 00:31:06,760 --> 00:31:11,760 Speaker 1: instill some of those sort of small town values into 521 00:31:11,920 --> 00:31:15,320 Speaker 1: kids who are living in LA. Well, here's the thing. 522 00:31:15,840 --> 00:31:18,320 Speaker 1: It's like one of those things where I think when 523 00:31:18,320 --> 00:31:21,840 Speaker 1: I moved to La, Jody did the drive with me. 524 00:31:22,560 --> 00:31:26,240 Speaker 1: You know, it's like I think I thought I would 525 00:31:26,240 --> 00:31:28,920 Speaker 1: be there very temporarily. Not only did I not think 526 00:31:28,960 --> 00:31:31,440 Speaker 1: I was going to, you know, marry someone you know 527 00:31:31,520 --> 00:31:33,520 Speaker 1: from there. But I definitely didn't plan on raising my 528 00:31:33,640 --> 00:31:38,719 Speaker 1: kids there just because it was so it is so different. 529 00:31:38,840 --> 00:31:43,480 Speaker 1: But I think, you know, a great thing is you 530 00:31:43,640 --> 00:31:49,320 Speaker 1: have now seen a little bit of you know, my upbringing, right, 531 00:31:49,360 --> 00:31:51,520 Speaker 1: whether it be through my parents and my brother and 532 00:31:51,600 --> 00:31:56,640 Speaker 1: now my friends. You know, in the experience, you've always 533 00:31:58,360 --> 00:32:02,400 Speaker 1: valued it and valued and trust did me in you know, 534 00:32:03,320 --> 00:32:07,040 Speaker 1: whatever the experiences were, whether it be from my parents 535 00:32:07,240 --> 00:32:11,360 Speaker 1: or you know, location in small town. But I've also 536 00:32:11,440 --> 00:32:14,240 Speaker 1: looked at, you know, the job your parents have done 537 00:32:14,360 --> 00:32:17,280 Speaker 1: and the things that you've been through to kind of say, okay, 538 00:32:17,880 --> 00:32:19,440 Speaker 1: there are a few things that were kind of great 539 00:32:19,480 --> 00:32:21,360 Speaker 1: that came out of this experience. Yeah, but you're also 540 00:32:21,440 --> 00:32:24,800 Speaker 1: supposed to, you know, the ideas like you marry your father, 541 00:32:25,440 --> 00:32:26,680 Speaker 1: you know what I mean, Like, do you think you 542 00:32:26,760 --> 00:32:32,360 Speaker 1: married your dad? Can we cut kidding? I'm just kidding, 543 00:32:32,800 --> 00:32:34,840 Speaker 1: I do. I mean there are things in a weird 544 00:32:34,840 --> 00:32:39,000 Speaker 1: way of course, like you know, it's it's it's different. 545 00:32:39,040 --> 00:32:42,200 Speaker 1: But yes, I if I had to say, like the 546 00:32:42,320 --> 00:32:46,760 Speaker 1: charming kind of you know, life of the party, you 547 00:32:46,800 --> 00:32:50,280 Speaker 1: walk in the room like there is something magnetic about 548 00:32:50,320 --> 00:32:52,680 Speaker 1: you and my dad. Yeah, but not to get back 549 00:32:52,720 --> 00:32:56,760 Speaker 1: to our previous episode that we did, you know, yeah, 550 00:32:56,760 --> 00:33:01,600 Speaker 1: but you know I was sort of this prince charming 551 00:33:01,680 --> 00:33:04,200 Speaker 1: in a sense, like your dad who puts you on 552 00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:06,840 Speaker 1: a pedestal. I mean, you know, he calls her pal 553 00:33:07,040 --> 00:33:10,440 Speaker 1: and and Brooks does to Aaron and and he still 554 00:33:10,520 --> 00:33:13,480 Speaker 1: kisses her and loves her and cries and you know it. 555 00:33:13,600 --> 00:33:17,080 Speaker 1: It's this this father daughter bond that is so amazing. 556 00:33:17,160 --> 00:33:23,760 Speaker 1: And and you know, I think you chose me and 557 00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:27,000 Speaker 1: had this idea that I was going to be like 558 00:33:27,200 --> 00:33:30,360 Speaker 1: that in a sense, and then of course to burst 559 00:33:30,400 --> 00:33:37,080 Speaker 1: that bubble, you know, it's being repaired. But no, but 560 00:33:37,160 --> 00:33:40,680 Speaker 1: here's the thing also, that's that's real life, you know, 561 00:33:40,800 --> 00:33:42,800 Speaker 1: because everybody is going to look at their father in 562 00:33:42,840 --> 00:33:45,600 Speaker 1: a certain way. Well it's your first you know, of 563 00:33:45,720 --> 00:33:47,640 Speaker 1: course you know your dad, of course, and it does 564 00:33:47,680 --> 00:33:51,040 Speaker 1: set the standard. And then I think, what's the irony is? 565 00:33:51,440 --> 00:33:54,920 Speaker 1: You know, I had this kind of perfect marriage, you know, 566 00:33:55,000 --> 00:33:57,600 Speaker 1: to look up to him. My parents never thought. I 567 00:33:57,640 --> 00:34:00,280 Speaker 1: mean the one time the Brooks and I talk about, 568 00:34:00,280 --> 00:34:03,000 Speaker 1: which is so funny from my childhood where I remember them, 569 00:34:03,440 --> 00:34:06,080 Speaker 1: they had a party at the house. My brother and 570 00:34:06,080 --> 00:34:09,080 Speaker 1: I were upstairs. Long story short, we heard them kind 571 00:34:09,080 --> 00:34:12,520 Speaker 1: of arguing. Wasn't even bad, but it was enough for 572 00:34:12,640 --> 00:34:14,640 Speaker 1: us to sit at the top of the stairs and say, 573 00:34:15,320 --> 00:34:17,479 Speaker 1: my gosh, like, what's going on, Like we've never really 574 00:34:17,520 --> 00:34:21,120 Speaker 1: heard this. And they were arguing and going back and forth. 575 00:34:21,160 --> 00:34:23,440 Speaker 1: And then they come around the corner and we're at 576 00:34:23,440 --> 00:34:26,160 Speaker 1: the top of the stairs sitting there, and they're like, oh, hey, 577 00:34:26,160 --> 00:34:27,960 Speaker 1: what are you guys still doing up you know, with 578 00:34:27,960 --> 00:34:30,480 Speaker 1: our ears sleep, And we were both like in tears 579 00:34:30,520 --> 00:34:34,239 Speaker 1: and we're like, are you guys getting a divorce? And 580 00:34:34,280 --> 00:34:37,680 Speaker 1: they start laughing and they're like wait, what, like no, why? 581 00:34:37,960 --> 00:34:41,680 Speaker 1: But that to me was like my parents were always 582 00:34:41,719 --> 00:34:44,600 Speaker 1: kind of happy and in love and you know whatever, 583 00:34:44,800 --> 00:34:47,839 Speaker 1: and just to hear them kind of have argument, it's 584 00:34:47,840 --> 00:34:52,000 Speaker 1: funny they translated it to divorce, right, And that is 585 00:34:52,719 --> 00:34:57,319 Speaker 1: that was your picture of what a relationship should be. Like. 586 00:34:58,320 --> 00:35:01,400 Speaker 1: You know, it's interesting when talking about parents or in 587 00:35:01,480 --> 00:35:04,040 Speaker 1: laws or how whatever the fuck this episode is about, 588 00:35:04,080 --> 00:35:06,760 Speaker 1: it doesn't really matter, but you know, that is your 589 00:35:07,000 --> 00:35:11,520 Speaker 1: picture of what you know a healthy relationship is because 590 00:35:11,560 --> 00:35:14,520 Speaker 1: it was beautiful and healthy. And then you go to me, 591 00:35:15,480 --> 00:35:17,960 Speaker 1: you know, and you look at my situation where you know, 592 00:35:18,160 --> 00:35:20,359 Speaker 1: my parents were divorced and I have a stepdad and 593 00:35:20,400 --> 00:35:23,279 Speaker 1: you know, YadA yah, and this is sort of my 594 00:35:23,680 --> 00:35:27,200 Speaker 1: picture of what it is to sort of be in 595 00:35:27,200 --> 00:35:30,319 Speaker 1: a relationship or absolutely. And I look at it, like, 596 00:35:30,360 --> 00:35:32,799 Speaker 1: why are you scared to get married? Like I remember that, 597 00:35:32,880 --> 00:35:34,920 Speaker 1: I mean beautiful, because I don't want to get married, 598 00:35:34,920 --> 00:35:36,200 Speaker 1: like I don't know if we talked about it in 599 00:35:36,239 --> 00:35:39,200 Speaker 1: the last you know, previous episodes, but you know, I didn't. 600 00:35:39,600 --> 00:35:41,560 Speaker 1: You didn't think that we were going to get married, 601 00:35:42,400 --> 00:35:44,560 Speaker 1: you know, because I didn't know if I wanted to 602 00:35:44,560 --> 00:35:47,520 Speaker 1: get married. I I saw a divorce and then I 603 00:35:47,560 --> 00:35:51,319 Speaker 1: saw Curt and Mom and it was it was it 604 00:35:51,400 --> 00:35:55,040 Speaker 1: was great. They were happy, you know, and so I 605 00:35:55,120 --> 00:35:56,440 Speaker 1: was like, oh, well that's the way you do it. 606 00:35:56,560 --> 00:36:00,200 Speaker 1: You just don't get married, I guess exactly, and were 607 00:36:00,280 --> 00:36:03,680 Speaker 1: challenging you and saying okay, but like you know, blah 608 00:36:03,719 --> 00:36:05,319 Speaker 1: blah blah. We would go back and forth and kind 609 00:36:05,320 --> 00:36:06,680 Speaker 1: of argue it, and I think at the end of 610 00:36:06,719 --> 00:36:08,680 Speaker 1: the day we broke it down because you would be like, 611 00:36:08,760 --> 00:36:10,960 Speaker 1: why do you want to get married? Like what is it? 612 00:36:11,000 --> 00:36:14,200 Speaker 1: And I said, I remember just being like, honestly, a 613 00:36:14,320 --> 00:36:17,840 Speaker 1: I want the party. We dad want my dad like 614 00:36:17,880 --> 00:36:20,600 Speaker 1: walk me down the aisle. Like there's just that kind 615 00:36:20,640 --> 00:36:26,279 Speaker 1: of tradition and romantic you know idea East Coast, West Coast. 616 00:36:27,400 --> 00:36:29,439 Speaker 1: That's the title that give you the title of the buck. 617 00:36:30,640 --> 00:36:34,239 Speaker 1: East Coast, West Coast. But you know, I think at 618 00:36:34,239 --> 00:36:36,600 Speaker 1: the end of the day, I know my parents. Did 619 00:36:37,400 --> 00:36:40,440 Speaker 1: you know my dad was Protestant, my mom was Catholic, 620 00:36:40,520 --> 00:36:43,839 Speaker 1: and you know they actually went through a lot of 621 00:36:44,200 --> 00:36:48,640 Speaker 1: you know, difficulties getting married and you know, my dad's 622 00:36:48,640 --> 00:36:51,279 Speaker 1: mom like didn't want to go to my christening. And 623 00:36:57,760 --> 00:37:03,359 Speaker 1: policy Genius Genius is the key word here. So they're 624 00:37:03,400 --> 00:37:08,879 Speaker 1: a leading online insurance marketplace. 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We were like just dating. 692 00:41:15,080 --> 00:41:18,640 Speaker 1: I mean, how long were we dating? When I had 693 00:41:18,640 --> 00:41:20,440 Speaker 1: to go, not had to, but I went. I went 694 00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:23,560 Speaker 1: out back east with you. Because your grandfather died a 695 00:41:23,640 --> 00:41:25,839 Speaker 1: year a little over year, a little over a year? 696 00:41:25,960 --> 00:41:30,120 Speaker 1: Was that long? That was trippy? Yeah, well, because it 697 00:41:30,200 --> 00:41:34,319 Speaker 1: was so it was open casket and I mean I 698 00:41:34,719 --> 00:41:39,400 Speaker 1: never I mean nuts, I show up and everyone I 699 00:41:39,440 --> 00:41:43,840 Speaker 1: was like, oh my god, answer meeting everybody, everyone in 700 00:41:43,880 --> 00:41:46,400 Speaker 1: the family for the first time. There's like funeral home. 701 00:41:46,560 --> 00:41:49,880 Speaker 1: I know, I was like crazy, I met your family 702 00:41:50,040 --> 00:41:56,160 Speaker 1: for the first time and standing over your grand my 703 00:41:56,239 --> 00:42:01,960 Speaker 1: parents and like hugged him in this casket. Remember, I 704 00:42:02,000 --> 00:42:06,480 Speaker 1: don't know, I think we got a little off track. Anyways, 705 00:42:07,160 --> 00:42:09,960 Speaker 1: here's the thing what I'll say, like with in laws, 706 00:42:10,800 --> 00:42:14,839 Speaker 1: is at a certain point, like you have to have 707 00:42:16,239 --> 00:42:20,759 Speaker 1: a connection with your partner that says, hey, you know, 708 00:42:21,080 --> 00:42:22,320 Speaker 1: these are the things that we're going to have to 709 00:42:22,400 --> 00:42:24,440 Speaker 1: kind of deal with. These are the things that you 710 00:42:24,440 --> 00:42:26,760 Speaker 1: know because you're making kind of your own new life. 711 00:42:27,239 --> 00:42:29,680 Speaker 1: And I look at it now having kids and having 712 00:42:29,719 --> 00:42:31,440 Speaker 1: like my older you know, my son getting older and 713 00:42:31,480 --> 00:42:34,680 Speaker 1: this and that, and you think, as the parent, your 714 00:42:34,800 --> 00:42:38,480 Speaker 1: kids are yours, like you fucking created them, you made them, 715 00:42:38,560 --> 00:42:40,719 Speaker 1: you own them, they're yours, and then you're letting them 716 00:42:40,760 --> 00:42:45,280 Speaker 1: go into this whole new world of somebody else's family 717 00:42:45,320 --> 00:42:49,680 Speaker 1: and traditions, and you know, you know, so both grandparents, 718 00:42:49,719 --> 00:42:52,160 Speaker 1: it's like you feel like they're yours and now you 719 00:42:52,160 --> 00:42:54,680 Speaker 1: have to share them. Imagine when Wilder or any of 720 00:42:54,719 --> 00:42:57,680 Speaker 1: our kids have a wife or a husband, and there 721 00:42:58,239 --> 00:43:00,680 Speaker 1: they're like, you know, sorry dad, back to New York, 722 00:43:01,000 --> 00:43:04,560 Speaker 1: going to New York for you know, Whoever's Christmas. I'd 723 00:43:04,560 --> 00:43:08,600 Speaker 1: be like, fuck, no, you're not You're not sorry, You're 724 00:43:08,640 --> 00:43:11,120 Speaker 1: not going well, I mean. And then that's when I 725 00:43:11,160 --> 00:43:13,480 Speaker 1: come in and say, I talk you off, calm you down, 726 00:43:13,719 --> 00:43:16,000 Speaker 1: and I say, you know, it's just me, but that's 727 00:43:16,000 --> 00:43:19,560 Speaker 1: what I'm saying. And now there's so much more nowadays, 728 00:43:19,600 --> 00:43:23,880 Speaker 1: I feel like, you know, different blended families and things, 729 00:43:23,920 --> 00:43:26,600 Speaker 1: and there's a little it's a little looser, but you know, 730 00:43:26,719 --> 00:43:28,399 Speaker 1: back in the day, I mean, you know, you're dealing 731 00:43:28,440 --> 00:43:32,799 Speaker 1: with traditions and families and different backgrounds and you know, 732 00:43:33,080 --> 00:43:36,719 Speaker 1: coasts and places south north, I mean, so many factors. 733 00:43:36,760 --> 00:43:39,680 Speaker 1: I'm sure people. No, I'm just saying, like, are you 734 00:43:39,719 --> 00:43:42,600 Speaker 1: from the midwest? Are you from the south? The east coast, 735 00:43:42,600 --> 00:43:47,080 Speaker 1: west coast? What did I say? What did I say? Like? 736 00:43:47,160 --> 00:43:51,120 Speaker 1: South north? I meant like from the south. But it's 737 00:43:51,120 --> 00:43:53,240 Speaker 1: funny because usually you go north, people go north south. 738 00:43:53,320 --> 00:43:57,280 Speaker 1: You went south. I like to go south north? You do? Yeah? 739 00:43:57,320 --> 00:44:00,960 Speaker 1: On me? If you start south and north and then 740 00:44:01,000 --> 00:44:05,839 Speaker 1: move north, yeah, please start at my and then move up. Yep, 741 00:44:11,800 --> 00:44:16,800 Speaker 1: we're getting off topic again. This is what happens anyways. 742 00:44:16,840 --> 00:44:22,279 Speaker 1: I will say, because you're funny speaking about sex though, 743 00:44:22,360 --> 00:44:26,200 Speaker 1: because there's you know, like sexual reference, Like your mom 744 00:44:26,239 --> 00:44:30,640 Speaker 1: and dad are always talking about sex. Mom's always like ah, 745 00:44:31,120 --> 00:44:34,279 Speaker 1: you know yeah, Brook's like your dad like, you know, 746 00:44:34,360 --> 00:44:36,680 Speaker 1: wants to jump on top of me and that. Yeah. 747 00:44:36,840 --> 00:44:38,799 Speaker 1: Brooks is always like hey, yea yea yeah, yeah yeah, 748 00:44:38,920 --> 00:44:41,319 Speaker 1: and they're still still going at It's still going at it. 749 00:44:41,440 --> 00:44:45,279 Speaker 1: I will say, thinking about in laws and it's it 750 00:44:45,320 --> 00:44:47,720 Speaker 1: can be a sensitive, like sore subject for some people. 751 00:44:47,760 --> 00:44:51,560 Speaker 1: We obviously got so fucking lucky. I mean, I've been 752 00:44:51,800 --> 00:44:54,080 Speaker 1: living with your family, you know, a few streets away 753 00:44:54,120 --> 00:44:59,160 Speaker 1: for twenty years. I mean holidays, trips, traveling. Like, but 754 00:44:59,200 --> 00:45:03,960 Speaker 1: I will say, like, just you know, there is this 755 00:45:04,080 --> 00:45:12,719 Speaker 1: feeling of warmth family. You know, they both always kind 756 00:45:12,719 --> 00:45:16,799 Speaker 1: of want the family to be together. You know, there 757 00:45:16,960 --> 00:45:20,960 Speaker 1: is even though it's a it's a small family, there's 758 00:45:22,120 --> 00:45:27,600 Speaker 1: a feeling of just generosity that is so big, right, 759 00:45:27,640 --> 00:45:31,800 Speaker 1: It's kind of always you know, whether it's Sunday family 760 00:45:31,840 --> 00:45:36,200 Speaker 1: dinners you know, movie nights, or big you know get 761 00:45:36,239 --> 00:45:40,799 Speaker 1: togethers like they they have both They both had that 762 00:45:40,920 --> 00:45:43,560 Speaker 1: I would say from their families. Cours family obviously, it's 763 00:45:43,640 --> 00:45:47,000 Speaker 1: amazing live in California and big and gregarious and all 764 00:45:47,040 --> 00:45:48,560 Speaker 1: of that. Yeah, I mean we have a bigger family 765 00:45:48,600 --> 00:45:51,239 Speaker 1: than you, you know. I mean, but it was great. 766 00:45:51,239 --> 00:45:53,000 Speaker 1: I mean we were back you seeing your family with 767 00:45:53,200 --> 00:45:56,480 Speaker 1: your aunts, you know. But it's smaller. You know, it's 768 00:45:56,520 --> 00:46:01,759 Speaker 1: like it's just brother cousins and the little cousins and 769 00:46:01,800 --> 00:46:03,520 Speaker 1: you know, but yeah, I mean it is. It's it's 770 00:46:03,560 --> 00:46:07,719 Speaker 1: definitely smaller. But when we used to all when I 771 00:46:07,800 --> 00:46:09,799 Speaker 1: used to live there and growing up, we always did 772 00:46:10,000 --> 00:46:12,360 Speaker 1: you know, big Thanksgiving sod Auntie Jill's and it was 773 00:46:12,360 --> 00:46:15,600 Speaker 1: a big gathering. So there's a very similar feeling to 774 00:46:16,120 --> 00:46:19,680 Speaker 1: do you miss that totally? Do you wish that they 775 00:46:19,719 --> 00:46:23,200 Speaker 1: still had? They still do. I'm just not there. They 776 00:46:23,200 --> 00:46:26,319 Speaker 1: still do it at either Jill's or my parents, hand 777 00:46:26,680 --> 00:46:29,839 Speaker 1: letting Craig and the cousins and everybody come. It was 778 00:46:30,600 --> 00:46:34,120 Speaker 1: so do you but you've never asked to go back 779 00:46:34,280 --> 00:46:39,319 Speaker 1: or Okay, so personally flying on Thanksgiving nightmare, don't want 780 00:46:39,320 --> 00:46:41,080 Speaker 1: to do it. And then I'm flying back to like 781 00:46:41,600 --> 00:46:45,120 Speaker 1: shitty like weather and Thanksgiving and I'd rather spend the 782 00:46:45,239 --> 00:46:48,760 Speaker 1: time with my family in the summer or at another 783 00:46:48,840 --> 00:46:52,440 Speaker 1: time than actually like Thanksgiving dinner, you know, having turkey. 784 00:46:52,880 --> 00:46:55,920 Speaker 1: But the tradition when we were growing up was at 785 00:46:56,000 --> 00:46:58,040 Speaker 1: Gill and Deb's old house that you don't didn't know 786 00:46:58,080 --> 00:47:00,879 Speaker 1: but and it was so fun. But would stop by 787 00:47:01,040 --> 00:47:03,920 Speaker 1: and come in late night and I've been drinking all day, 788 00:47:03,960 --> 00:47:07,600 Speaker 1: football games, board games, fun. You know, it got wild 789 00:47:07,640 --> 00:47:09,600 Speaker 1: and crazy, and it's a part of my childhood. I 790 00:47:09,680 --> 00:47:12,239 Speaker 1: remember being young and watching the adults all party. Then 791 00:47:12,280 --> 00:47:14,600 Speaker 1: I remember being like a teenager. Then I remember coming 792 00:47:14,600 --> 00:47:17,920 Speaker 1: home at college, like you know, it was a big tradition. 793 00:47:18,000 --> 00:47:23,840 Speaker 1: It was bigger than Christmas for my family, and you know, 794 00:47:23,920 --> 00:47:26,040 Speaker 1: so you kind of you know, you want to continue 795 00:47:26,120 --> 00:47:30,120 Speaker 1: the traditions. But at the end of the day, it's 796 00:47:30,160 --> 00:47:34,200 Speaker 1: about travel too, I don't. I always think traveling on 797 00:47:34,239 --> 00:47:36,440 Speaker 1: the holidays is such a pain in the ass. I 798 00:47:36,440 --> 00:47:40,319 Speaker 1: would rather have quality time, not on a holiday and 799 00:47:40,360 --> 00:47:42,600 Speaker 1: not travel. But that's me, and I think my parents 800 00:47:42,640 --> 00:47:45,160 Speaker 1: feel the same way. They flew out. When your parents 801 00:47:45,160 --> 00:47:52,640 Speaker 1: are so easy going, you know, are people think maybe 802 00:47:52,960 --> 00:47:56,719 Speaker 1: should I talk about your mom and dad? Keep the 803 00:47:56,800 --> 00:48:02,799 Speaker 1: viewer listeners engaged. One thing I will say about coming 804 00:48:02,800 --> 00:48:04,479 Speaker 1: into the family. I mean, I know we talked about 805 00:48:04,520 --> 00:48:07,400 Speaker 1: like me meeting Kate, you know, for the first time, 806 00:48:07,600 --> 00:48:12,040 Speaker 1: and you know, Boston was definitely like, who's this new 807 00:48:12,080 --> 00:48:15,400 Speaker 1: person because he loved Vanessa. You know why it was 808 00:48:15,520 --> 00:48:21,839 Speaker 1: thirteen and a teenager, you know why it was Matthews. 809 00:48:21,920 --> 00:48:27,320 Speaker 1: It's so crazy. But I would say that they were 810 00:48:28,800 --> 00:48:33,480 Speaker 1: so you know, warm and welcoming and always themselves like 811 00:48:34,080 --> 00:48:40,799 Speaker 1: you know, Kurt, he's you know, so wants to have 812 00:48:40,840 --> 00:48:44,640 Speaker 1: a great connection and conversations and a good time, and 813 00:48:44,800 --> 00:48:49,960 Speaker 1: you know, there's just a joy you know to them. 814 00:48:50,040 --> 00:48:54,440 Speaker 1: And I think they saw, you know, you and I 815 00:48:54,520 --> 00:48:59,239 Speaker 1: as you know, kind of like not that I was 816 00:48:59,280 --> 00:49:01,160 Speaker 1: like good for you, but I think that there was 817 00:49:01,200 --> 00:49:04,359 Speaker 1: a feeling of like, oh I hope this. Oh yeah, 818 00:49:04,400 --> 00:49:07,960 Speaker 1: you know, you're good for me. I remember remember Kurt. Yeah, 819 00:49:08,000 --> 00:49:10,759 Speaker 1: he was like he's like, that's the girl you need 820 00:49:10,800 --> 00:49:13,600 Speaker 1: to marry. Before we were even together, that's the girl. 821 00:49:14,160 --> 00:49:15,960 Speaker 1: There's something Yeah, that's the girl you should be with, 822 00:49:18,640 --> 00:49:20,000 Speaker 1: you know. And I think that's kind of like the 823 00:49:20,040 --> 00:49:23,239 Speaker 1: East Coast, you know, Va. I don't know whatever it 824 00:49:23,320 --> 00:49:25,239 Speaker 1: is that well, we're going to be in laws at 825 00:49:25,280 --> 00:49:29,600 Speaker 1: some point. I know it's crazy, you know, hopefully to 826 00:49:33,520 --> 00:49:37,640 Speaker 1: Grace Long just kidding, Oh my god, Well there's gonna Gilby. 827 00:49:37,719 --> 00:49:39,200 Speaker 1: I wonder if we're going to be good in laws. 828 00:49:39,239 --> 00:49:41,520 Speaker 1: I mean probably, you know, I would think, well, if 829 00:49:41,520 --> 00:49:44,439 Speaker 1: it's Nicole and Eric, we're going to be Well, I'm 830 00:49:44,520 --> 00:49:47,759 Speaker 1: just kidding. Please can you just go go with my 831 00:49:47,840 --> 00:49:52,399 Speaker 1: dream fantasy for a minute. I know it's too good. 832 00:49:52,480 --> 00:49:54,239 Speaker 1: I mean, you were home and you got you get 833 00:49:54,280 --> 00:49:57,000 Speaker 1: such a taste of kind of like my upbringing and 834 00:49:57,239 --> 00:49:59,360 Speaker 1: just the different world you know. I mean I've lived 835 00:49:59,400 --> 00:50:04,239 Speaker 1: in yours. I all your friends and you know, childhood 836 00:50:04,239 --> 00:50:07,480 Speaker 1: friends and you know, dynamics and things, and you know 837 00:50:07,520 --> 00:50:12,640 Speaker 1: you've slowly now been experiencing a little bit more. Yeah. Yeah, 838 00:50:12,719 --> 00:50:15,160 Speaker 1: I mean you haven't been home to actual like Long Meadow, 839 00:50:15,719 --> 00:50:24,880 Speaker 1: like you know, the rough streets. But yeah, but you know, 840 00:50:25,400 --> 00:50:27,160 Speaker 1: and I still think that you're only with me because 841 00:50:27,200 --> 00:50:30,919 Speaker 1: of who my parents are. Well, I mean I think 842 00:50:30,920 --> 00:50:32,880 Speaker 1: this is a good time and place to kind of 843 00:50:32,960 --> 00:50:36,000 Speaker 1: let the cat out of the bag. That that was 844 00:50:36,040 --> 00:50:39,279 Speaker 1: my goal. It's been an insecurity of mine for a 845 00:50:39,320 --> 00:50:42,000 Speaker 1: long time. All right, good, Well, I'm glad we're getting 846 00:50:42,040 --> 00:50:45,520 Speaker 1: it out. Okay, how do we wrap it up? I 847 00:50:45,560 --> 00:50:51,000 Speaker 1: would say, when you're in a relationship, obviously we're sitting here, 848 00:50:51,080 --> 00:50:53,279 Speaker 1: you know, talking about how lucky we got and we 849 00:50:53,360 --> 00:50:56,959 Speaker 1: had the in law jackpot, which you know we did. 850 00:50:58,920 --> 00:51:01,560 Speaker 1: Even though it's a crazy world to be thrown into, 851 00:51:02,600 --> 00:51:04,520 Speaker 1: you know, with yours just in the public eye and 852 00:51:04,680 --> 00:51:07,080 Speaker 1: you know, dealing with so many different levels and layers, 853 00:51:07,680 --> 00:51:12,400 Speaker 1: behind closed doors, it's the most normal, you know, family 854 00:51:12,440 --> 00:51:14,160 Speaker 1: that just wants to be together and laugh and have 855 00:51:14,239 --> 00:51:18,759 Speaker 1: a good time. And that was the connection for me 856 00:51:19,000 --> 00:51:21,920 Speaker 1: where I was like, God, even though this is some crazy, 857 00:51:23,120 --> 00:51:30,080 Speaker 1: you know, celebrity, you know, family inside closed doors, there 858 00:51:30,160 --> 00:51:33,080 Speaker 1: was such a familiarity for me. I felt like being home. 859 00:51:33,120 --> 00:51:36,520 Speaker 1: I've never once I missed my family, like on a 860 00:51:36,640 --> 00:51:39,640 Speaker 1: daily basis, and being across country has always been kind 861 00:51:39,680 --> 00:51:43,440 Speaker 1: of a, you know, a sad thing for me, just 862 00:51:43,480 --> 00:51:45,719 Speaker 1: because I was extremely close with my family and my 863 00:51:45,760 --> 00:51:51,080 Speaker 1: brother and you know just everything my extended family. But 864 00:51:51,920 --> 00:51:56,239 Speaker 1: at least that sense of feeling comfort in family, meaning 865 00:51:56,280 --> 00:51:58,520 Speaker 1: when I go to my in law's house, I feel 866 00:51:58,520 --> 00:52:01,560 Speaker 1: like it's my own. I feel there's warmth, there's joy, 867 00:52:01,600 --> 00:52:04,880 Speaker 1: there's comfort, there's laughter, there's all the things that you 868 00:52:05,040 --> 00:52:08,960 Speaker 1: kind of crave that you miss that you miss, you know, 869 00:52:09,320 --> 00:52:15,479 Speaker 1: and I never have felt like uncomfortable or being there 870 00:52:15,600 --> 00:52:18,040 Speaker 1: doesn't make me miss my family like I think a 871 00:52:18,080 --> 00:52:20,360 Speaker 1: lot of times people are like, oh, I wish I 872 00:52:20,400 --> 00:52:22,359 Speaker 1: was in here, I was with my family. I miss 873 00:52:22,400 --> 00:52:24,359 Speaker 1: my family every day. I wish I was with them, 874 00:52:24,400 --> 00:52:27,840 Speaker 1: of course, but there was a comfort there that I 875 00:52:27,880 --> 00:52:31,759 Speaker 1: think helped me, you know, in the long run. And 876 00:52:31,800 --> 00:52:38,319 Speaker 1: I think, you know, just dealing with and accepting when 877 00:52:38,360 --> 00:52:41,239 Speaker 1: you're in a relationship and if it isn't as kind 878 00:52:41,280 --> 00:52:45,239 Speaker 1: of picturesque as our situation has been or easy, it's 879 00:52:45,280 --> 00:52:48,920 Speaker 1: finding your partner and finding something to kind of be 880 00:52:49,000 --> 00:52:52,400 Speaker 1: on the same level or playing with, do you know 881 00:52:52,440 --> 00:52:54,560 Speaker 1: what I mean, something to connect on and kind of 882 00:52:55,000 --> 00:52:58,759 Speaker 1: not make it a battle or a competition, you know, 883 00:52:58,760 --> 00:53:00,600 Speaker 1: because I look and I'm like, all right, we're building 884 00:53:00,600 --> 00:53:03,160 Speaker 1: this family together. I think my parents love the tradition 885 00:53:03,239 --> 00:53:04,759 Speaker 1: that we come back home and they have a little 886 00:53:04,760 --> 00:53:08,920 Speaker 1: bit of East Coast and they you know, see that 887 00:53:09,040 --> 00:53:14,480 Speaker 1: side of the country and their family, and so it's 888 00:53:14,520 --> 00:53:16,239 Speaker 1: you know, there's a lot of things to kind of 889 00:53:17,320 --> 00:53:22,319 Speaker 1: deal with and people to please, and it's it's just 890 00:53:23,120 --> 00:53:24,799 Speaker 1: you know, I look sometimes and I'm like, thank god, 891 00:53:24,800 --> 00:53:27,080 Speaker 1: we're not against each other, like what about me? And 892 00:53:27,120 --> 00:53:28,840 Speaker 1: you know, I think a lot of times in relationships, 893 00:53:28,840 --> 00:53:31,040 Speaker 1: whether it be in laws or anything, it's like you 894 00:53:31,080 --> 00:53:34,160 Speaker 1: want to be heard, you want to be seen, you know, 895 00:53:35,440 --> 00:53:37,920 Speaker 1: and that's just an important thing to figure out, Like 896 00:53:37,960 --> 00:53:43,200 Speaker 1: before you get married, you should not be with someone 897 00:53:43,480 --> 00:53:47,160 Speaker 1: no no, no, no go in knowing like you may 898 00:53:47,320 --> 00:53:52,400 Speaker 1: like we got to figure this out because you know, yeah, 899 00:53:53,440 --> 00:53:55,799 Speaker 1: I mean even traditionally we talked about it before where 900 00:53:55,840 --> 00:54:00,799 Speaker 1: I didn't even ask your dad if I could marry you, yeah, 901 00:54:00,920 --> 00:54:03,000 Speaker 1: you know, if you know, to get his blessing. I 902 00:54:03,000 --> 00:54:05,320 Speaker 1: didn't even think about it. It wasn't even an interesting 903 00:54:05,400 --> 00:54:07,920 Speaker 1: thing to look because I knew when I met you 904 00:54:08,160 --> 00:54:10,920 Speaker 1: or we started dating this and that like obviously I 905 00:54:11,040 --> 00:54:13,080 Speaker 1: was attracted to you. I was thinking about us and 906 00:54:13,680 --> 00:54:17,440 Speaker 1: dating and you know, but when I really started falling 907 00:54:17,560 --> 00:54:23,440 Speaker 1: falling for you and just thinking whoa I remember going 908 00:54:23,560 --> 00:54:27,600 Speaker 1: to who you would be possibly as a father, just 909 00:54:27,719 --> 00:54:31,759 Speaker 1: your childhood, your family values, like all of those kind 910 00:54:31,800 --> 00:54:36,760 Speaker 1: of things, and knowing how much you kind of connected 911 00:54:36,800 --> 00:54:39,160 Speaker 1: with my parents, and you know, I just there was 912 00:54:39,200 --> 00:54:42,239 Speaker 1: something in there that, oh yeah, well that's a big 913 00:54:42,320 --> 00:54:46,760 Speaker 1: test you know, meeting the in laws is a big test. 914 00:54:46,840 --> 00:54:48,960 Speaker 1: I mean, that's a big moment. Yeah, where it's like, 915 00:54:48,960 --> 00:54:51,759 Speaker 1: all right, here we go, you know, it's time to 916 00:54:51,800 --> 00:54:54,719 Speaker 1: meet the parents. But also like it, you know, so 917 00:54:54,760 --> 00:54:56,839 Speaker 1: when I was going, oh, there's so much Well that's 918 00:54:56,880 --> 00:54:58,480 Speaker 1: why when I was going to Tampa to meet your 919 00:54:58,640 --> 00:55:00,200 Speaker 1: family for the first time, I didn't want to go 920 00:55:01,120 --> 00:55:03,480 Speaker 1: right after your last boyfriend was there, you know, and 921 00:55:03,520 --> 00:55:05,000 Speaker 1: I was like, give me, let me give it a beat. 922 00:55:05,040 --> 00:55:07,640 Speaker 1: This is a big moment, you know, because this is 923 00:55:07,680 --> 00:55:11,959 Speaker 1: where that this is where the person that I love, 924 00:55:12,280 --> 00:55:16,080 Speaker 1: you know, her parents are going to meet me and 925 00:55:16,160 --> 00:55:19,520 Speaker 1: judge me. Of course that's natural, totally, and see how 926 00:55:19,560 --> 00:55:23,120 Speaker 1: that dynamic works. And if it goes off great, then 927 00:55:23,160 --> 00:55:27,320 Speaker 1: oh my god, yes, it's just one more step to 928 00:55:27,719 --> 00:55:31,399 Speaker 1: a potential great future. But if it doesn't go well, right, 929 00:55:31,800 --> 00:55:35,480 Speaker 1: But my dad was it wasn't like drilling you and 930 00:55:35,600 --> 00:55:37,840 Speaker 1: judging you. He was like, what's up, buddy, let's go 931 00:55:37,880 --> 00:55:41,759 Speaker 1: have some beer, drinking like immediately and your mom was 932 00:55:41,840 --> 00:55:44,640 Speaker 1: drinking and we were smoking cigarettes. I was like, oh wow. 933 00:55:45,200 --> 00:55:47,480 Speaker 1: And then but it was different if yours was more 934 00:55:47,760 --> 00:55:50,200 Speaker 1: mine was more traditional, like going over to meet the 935 00:55:50,239 --> 00:55:54,320 Speaker 1: parents like, but you were just around. I was around, okay, 936 00:55:54,320 --> 00:55:59,800 Speaker 1: but your previous girlfriend was the most like naturally stunning, 937 00:56:00,520 --> 00:56:05,080 Speaker 1: you know, kind of chic beautiful girlfriend. And she was 938 00:56:05,120 --> 00:56:08,200 Speaker 1: a Buddhist and goldie, you know, was into Buddhism, and 939 00:56:08,239 --> 00:56:11,200 Speaker 1: so I just thought, here I am, like I want 940 00:56:11,200 --> 00:56:14,560 Speaker 1: to be actress, you know, like blonde and cute and 941 00:56:14,600 --> 00:56:18,920 Speaker 1: like showing up like you know, like after like My 942 00:56:19,040 --> 00:56:22,880 Speaker 1: Walk of Shame, and like there was this like natural 943 00:56:23,200 --> 00:56:27,040 Speaker 1: beautiful Buddhists, you know, like Vanessa, like she was part 944 00:56:27,080 --> 00:56:29,880 Speaker 1: of the family band. One night, like when I met 945 00:56:31,160 --> 00:56:33,200 Speaker 1: Ar was like coming to the house and you guys 946 00:56:33,200 --> 00:56:36,160 Speaker 1: are all like on bongos and like Tom Cruise and 947 00:56:36,239 --> 00:56:39,800 Speaker 1: Kate are like on the microphone, and there's like Vanessa 948 00:56:40,000 --> 00:56:42,480 Speaker 1: and I was like, oh okay, so she's like part 949 00:56:42,520 --> 00:56:44,239 Speaker 1: of the family band. Then there's like pictures of you 950 00:56:44,280 --> 00:56:46,960 Speaker 1: guys in like Peru, like in a big family album. 951 00:56:47,000 --> 00:56:50,799 Speaker 1: I mean, I was like, okay, now they're meeting me, 952 00:56:51,120 --> 00:56:54,680 Speaker 1: like you know, normally i'd be like any parents or 953 00:56:54,680 --> 00:56:57,440 Speaker 1: in laws like dream and then there I was like, 954 00:56:57,640 --> 00:57:01,160 Speaker 1: you are so inadequate. We talked a little bit before 955 00:57:01,400 --> 00:57:05,640 Speaker 1: about how you know, I there are certain things about 956 00:57:05,719 --> 00:57:09,799 Speaker 1: me that are like your dad or similarities same thing 957 00:57:09,960 --> 00:57:13,360 Speaker 1: for me, you know, and Mom. You know, there's a 958 00:57:13,480 --> 00:57:19,800 Speaker 1: spirit about you, you know, sort of a positivity, you know, 959 00:57:20,360 --> 00:57:24,000 Speaker 1: wanting to sort of help people and and pick up 960 00:57:24,040 --> 00:57:28,960 Speaker 1: the underdog, and just the outlook on life and the 961 00:57:29,040 --> 00:57:32,000 Speaker 1: sort of your nature is very similar. I mean, there's 962 00:57:33,040 --> 00:57:38,880 Speaker 1: no doubt about it. You know. I think that's that's natural. 963 00:57:38,960 --> 00:57:43,160 Speaker 1: It's normal that you sort of unless unless your dad 964 00:57:43,240 --> 00:57:45,720 Speaker 1: or your mother is just a total disaster and then 965 00:57:45,760 --> 00:57:50,120 Speaker 1: you go against it, you know, and you marry the 966 00:57:50,200 --> 00:57:53,400 Speaker 1: opposite of your mother or your father because you just 967 00:57:53,440 --> 00:57:56,840 Speaker 1: can't stand them totally. That's not the case, you know. 968 00:57:58,320 --> 00:58:00,360 Speaker 1: I think we should end there on the fact that, 969 00:58:00,440 --> 00:58:04,640 Speaker 1: like you think of anything like your mom. It's a 970 00:58:04,680 --> 00:58:11,920 Speaker 1: perfect place to end because I'll take that. Yeah, I mean, 971 00:58:11,960 --> 00:58:14,080 Speaker 1: it's interesting. It's just fun to see it evolve. And now, 972 00:58:14,120 --> 00:58:16,040 Speaker 1: I mean, here we are doing this podcast looking back 973 00:58:16,080 --> 00:58:20,360 Speaker 1: because it's been twenty years, which still blows my mind. 974 00:58:20,480 --> 00:58:23,320 Speaker 1: But it's a long time to look back and think 975 00:58:23,360 --> 00:58:28,240 Speaker 1: and just how it's all evolved. But yeah, I know, 976 00:58:30,040 --> 00:58:35,240 Speaker 1: all right, thanks for humoring me. Who me are the listeners? 977 00:58:36,920 --> 00:58:43,280 Speaker 1: Well you, I guess all right, you will hear from 978 00:58:43,360 --> 00:58:46,560 Speaker 1: us again, and I'm sure, what do you want to hear? 979 00:58:47,400 --> 00:58:51,720 Speaker 1: That's a good question to ask, email right, respond, Yeah, 980 00:58:51,720 --> 00:58:54,720 Speaker 1: shoot an email too, because it's fun. We're having fun 981 00:58:54,760 --> 00:58:58,000 Speaker 1: while Kate's working, and yeah, Kate's busy, so we're sort 982 00:58:58,000 --> 00:58:59,880 Speaker 1: of taking over just a little bit. I mean, Kate 983 00:58:59,880 --> 00:59:03,560 Speaker 1: and I will be sporadically throwing some some things in there, 984 00:59:03,600 --> 00:59:07,680 Speaker 1: and you know, Aaron and I we're filling in. So 985 00:59:07,680 --> 00:59:10,200 Speaker 1: what do you want to hear? All right? We might 986 00:59:10,280 --> 00:59:12,640 Speaker 1: need to video one of these at some point because 987 00:59:12,640 --> 00:59:17,760 Speaker 1: it is funny, I know. All right, Well, all right, 988 00:59:18,120 --> 00:59:22,240 Speaker 1: I love you, love you, love our parents, love our parents. 989 00:59:22,240 --> 00:59:26,720 Speaker 1: We got lucky. I'll talk to you. I'll talk to 990 00:59:26,760 --> 00:59:28,680 Speaker 1: you later. Yeah, call me later. Yeah, I'll see you later. 991 00:59:29,200 --> 00:59:35,000 Speaker 1: I'll shoot you a text. Sibling Revelry is executive produced 992 00:59:35,000 --> 00:59:38,280 Speaker 1: by Kate Hudson and Oliver Hudson. Producer is Alison. President, 993 00:59:38,560 --> 00:59:44,000 Speaker 1: editor is Josh Wendish. Music by Mark Hudson aka Uncle Mark. 994 00:59:44,080 --> 00:59:46,080 Speaker 1: If you want to show us some love, rate the 995 00:59:46,120 --> 00:59:48,680 Speaker 1: show and leave us a review. This show is powered 996 00:59:48,680 --> 00:59:51,400 Speaker 1: by simple cast