1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:04,080 Speaker 1: First date of follow up powered by the Advocates Injury 2 00:00:04,080 --> 00:00:06,840 Speaker 1: Attorneys online at advocatesla dot com. 3 00:00:06,920 --> 00:00:08,680 Speaker 2: Ryan is on the phone today for a first day 4 00:00:08,720 --> 00:00:11,960 Speaker 2: follow up and he's getting ghosted by Ella. So in 5 00:00:11,960 --> 00:00:13,480 Speaker 2: a few minutes we'll call her see if you tell 6 00:00:13,560 --> 00:00:15,400 Speaker 2: us why she's ghosting him and maybe get him another 7 00:00:15,480 --> 00:00:17,760 Speaker 2: date the first Ryan, how long has it been since 8 00:00:17,760 --> 00:00:18,439 Speaker 2: you heard from Ella? 9 00:00:19,920 --> 00:00:24,520 Speaker 3: It's been It's just been a few days. But you know, 10 00:00:24,560 --> 00:00:28,360 Speaker 3: it was such a intin connection. I'm really baffled. 11 00:00:28,800 --> 00:00:30,040 Speaker 4: What was your last interaction? 12 00:00:30,240 --> 00:00:34,400 Speaker 3: Like, well, we I mean initially we we were just 13 00:00:34,440 --> 00:00:37,960 Speaker 3: you know, texting over Bumble the dating app, and but 14 00:00:37,960 --> 00:00:39,640 Speaker 3: but we we did go out. We went on a 15 00:00:40,000 --> 00:00:42,639 Speaker 3: We went on a first date to a nice restaurant, 16 00:00:42,640 --> 00:00:45,440 Speaker 3: and I don't think it could have gone any better. 17 00:00:45,479 --> 00:00:48,080 Speaker 4: Really, Okay, we'll tell us about the date. 18 00:00:49,280 --> 00:00:51,519 Speaker 3: Yeah, so we we went to the Italian place. We 19 00:00:51,520 --> 00:00:56,800 Speaker 3: were both u both pasta lovers, and we were just laughing, drinking. 20 00:00:57,840 --> 00:01:00,800 Speaker 3: We bonded over the fact that we're both really divorced 21 00:01:00,920 --> 00:01:07,160 Speaker 3: and still new to the dating world. Everything's changed a lot. 22 00:01:07,440 --> 00:01:11,600 Speaker 3: And she she told me she wanted to start a family, 23 00:01:12,000 --> 00:01:15,080 Speaker 3: and I told her I actually I'm already at dad, 24 00:01:15,240 --> 00:01:18,600 Speaker 3: and she took that. She was just like in she was. 25 00:01:18,880 --> 00:01:20,760 Speaker 3: She wanted to see pictures of my son and wanted 26 00:01:20,800 --> 00:01:25,920 Speaker 3: to hear stories. It was an incredible conversation after you know, 27 00:01:26,480 --> 00:01:28,959 Speaker 3: the check came and everything, and she didn't want it 28 00:01:29,000 --> 00:01:32,199 Speaker 3: to or we didn't want it to end, I guess. 29 00:01:32,240 --> 00:01:35,520 Speaker 3: So we went to the bar to you know, to 30 00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:40,160 Speaker 3: have a little coffee and just keep chatting. And you know, 31 00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:42,119 Speaker 3: we both had to get up the next morning and work, 32 00:01:42,280 --> 00:01:46,280 Speaker 3: so we made plans to meet up again. I thought 33 00:01:46,319 --> 00:01:49,600 Speaker 3: we could go on a bike ride, and she was 34 00:01:49,640 --> 00:01:52,280 Speaker 3: into that idea and said we you know, I'd text 35 00:01:52,280 --> 00:01:54,560 Speaker 3: her the next day, and I mean I thought that 36 00:01:54,640 --> 00:01:55,440 Speaker 3: second day was going to. 37 00:01:55,480 --> 00:01:56,160 Speaker 4: Happen for sure. 38 00:01:56,960 --> 00:01:59,520 Speaker 1: So you guys basically made plans for a second date 39 00:01:59,600 --> 00:02:00,760 Speaker 1: and it just never happened. 40 00:02:01,720 --> 00:02:05,320 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I haven't. She didn't respond back ever. 41 00:02:06,000 --> 00:02:08,400 Speaker 2: Did anything awkward at all happened on the date? Any 42 00:02:08,440 --> 00:02:10,480 Speaker 2: reason you can think of that you're getting ghosted. 43 00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:14,760 Speaker 3: I mean, like the one there's one thing where I'm like, 44 00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:17,600 Speaker 3: I guess I could have this might have been a 45 00:02:17,680 --> 00:02:20,720 Speaker 3: dumb thing to say when we switched from our you know, 46 00:02:20,760 --> 00:02:23,919 Speaker 3: our dinner table to the bar. The bartender came up 47 00:02:23,960 --> 00:02:26,680 Speaker 3: to us and he asked if me and my wife, 48 00:02:26,960 --> 00:02:29,679 Speaker 3: you know, wanted what we wanted to drink, and I 49 00:02:30,240 --> 00:02:33,000 Speaker 3: didn't correct him. I said, oh, you know, I thought 50 00:02:33,000 --> 00:02:35,640 Speaker 3: it was kind of cute. I thought, actually, my wife 51 00:02:35,639 --> 00:02:37,160 Speaker 3: and I were just going to have an express, so 52 00:02:37,240 --> 00:02:38,239 Speaker 3: it's not okay. 53 00:02:38,320 --> 00:02:41,960 Speaker 5: And she laughed too, and you know. 54 00:02:42,040 --> 00:02:46,320 Speaker 3: I I thought, okay, sweet, like she gets my sense 55 00:02:46,360 --> 00:02:50,040 Speaker 3: of humor and everything. And I went to the bathroom. 56 00:02:50,080 --> 00:02:53,880 Speaker 3: I came back, but she was if something happened. I 57 00:02:53,919 --> 00:02:55,880 Speaker 3: don't know, she maybe had time to think about it 58 00:02:56,000 --> 00:02:58,519 Speaker 3: or I offended her, you know. When I got back, 59 00:02:58,560 --> 00:03:02,800 Speaker 3: she seemed kind of anxious to leave little antsy and 60 00:03:02,880 --> 00:03:03,639 Speaker 3: we just, you. 61 00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:04,639 Speaker 4: Know, hugged good by. 62 00:03:05,120 --> 00:03:08,919 Speaker 3: I kissed her on the cheek, and I don't I guess, 63 00:03:09,680 --> 00:03:11,640 Speaker 3: I guess I put my foot in my mouth there. 64 00:03:11,800 --> 00:03:13,760 Speaker 4: Maybe if she laughed about it. 65 00:03:13,880 --> 00:03:16,880 Speaker 1: However, I could see if you're somebody that's freshly divorced 66 00:03:16,919 --> 00:03:19,320 Speaker 1: and not being a wife anymore, and then even to 67 00:03:19,360 --> 00:03:21,679 Speaker 1: be joked, like, even if it's just joking, that's a 68 00:03:21,720 --> 00:03:24,560 Speaker 1: title that you gave up, and then to be like, ah, 69 00:03:24,560 --> 00:03:26,440 Speaker 1: my wife maybe just kind of put her in her 70 00:03:26,480 --> 00:03:28,440 Speaker 1: feels maybe had nothing to do with you at all. 71 00:03:28,560 --> 00:03:30,959 Speaker 4: It just kind of put her in her feels or something. 72 00:03:31,560 --> 00:03:34,920 Speaker 4: I don't know. Yeah, that's tough. Have you reached out 73 00:03:34,960 --> 00:03:36,240 Speaker 4: to her then? Since? 74 00:03:37,160 --> 00:03:39,800 Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean the next day I texted about, you know, 75 00:03:40,240 --> 00:03:42,520 Speaker 3: the bike ride. I had found some different you know, 76 00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:44,760 Speaker 3: trails we could try out and see what would work 77 00:03:44,800 --> 00:03:48,800 Speaker 3: for her. And you know, I didn't hear anything back, 78 00:03:48,840 --> 00:03:51,760 Speaker 3: and I figured, you know, I don't know, she busy 79 00:03:51,840 --> 00:03:54,400 Speaker 3: or whatever. I'd just give it a little little space. 80 00:03:54,440 --> 00:04:00,560 Speaker 3: I texted, you know again the next day and yeah. 81 00:04:00,400 --> 00:04:00,560 Speaker 5: Just. 82 00:04:03,040 --> 00:04:05,280 Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, well we'll see if we can figure it 83 00:04:05,280 --> 00:04:06,920 Speaker 2: out for you. Then we'll play a song come Back, 84 00:04:07,360 --> 00:04:09,560 Speaker 2: and then call her and stef hotels why she's ghosting you, 85 00:04:09,640 --> 00:04:10,720 Speaker 2: and maybe get you another date. 86 00:04:10,760 --> 00:04:12,080 Speaker 5: Okay, that'd be great. 87 00:04:12,160 --> 00:04:13,400 Speaker 4: Yeah, all right, well plays. 88 00:04:13,120 --> 00:04:14,880 Speaker 2: Song come Back, get your first day follow up next. 89 00:04:16,520 --> 00:04:18,200 Speaker 2: Right in the middle of the first day follow up 90 00:04:18,200 --> 00:04:20,279 Speaker 2: and if you're just joining us, Ryan is on the 91 00:04:20,279 --> 00:04:23,200 Speaker 2: phone and he's getting ghosted by Ella. So we're about 92 00:04:23,240 --> 00:04:25,600 Speaker 2: to call her stuftelus why she's ghosting him, and maybe 93 00:04:25,600 --> 00:04:27,520 Speaker 2: get him another date. But before we do that, Ryan, 94 00:04:27,839 --> 00:04:30,400 Speaker 2: why don't you refresh our memory on your date with Ella. 95 00:04:32,240 --> 00:04:35,920 Speaker 3: Yeah. We went out to dinner Italian restaurant. We had 96 00:04:35,920 --> 00:04:38,880 Speaker 3: a great time. She loved the fact that I'm a 97 00:04:38,960 --> 00:04:42,960 Speaker 3: dad and she's she's divorced too, and you know, but 98 00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:46,719 Speaker 3: still wants to have a family. We we had coffee 99 00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:50,480 Speaker 3: at the bar after dinner, and I referred to it 100 00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:53,760 Speaker 3: as my wife as a joke, and then the vibe changed. 101 00:04:55,640 --> 00:04:58,479 Speaker 2: It was sacrifice tough when something like that happens off somewhere, 102 00:04:58,480 --> 00:04:59,920 Speaker 2: you're on a date and someone calls him your girlf 103 00:05:00,160 --> 00:05:02,120 Speaker 2: because you don't want to be like, yeah, they are, 104 00:05:02,160 --> 00:05:03,920 Speaker 2: but you also don't to be like whoa, no way, 105 00:05:04,600 --> 00:05:08,960 Speaker 2: don't even think that the other way, Like I would 106 00:05:09,080 --> 00:05:11,400 Speaker 2: never all right, well that would be way. 107 00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:12,960 Speaker 4: You ready for us to call her? 108 00:05:13,440 --> 00:05:13,680 Speaker 3: Yeah? 109 00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:14,080 Speaker 5: Please? 110 00:05:14,200 --> 00:05:36,440 Speaker 4: Okay, here we go? I may I speak to Ella? Please? Ella? 111 00:05:36,520 --> 00:05:36,599 Speaker 1: Hi? 112 00:05:36,680 --> 00:05:38,440 Speaker 4: How are you? My name is Jewbel. I'm calling from 113 00:05:38,440 --> 00:05:40,000 Speaker 4: a radio show called the Jewbill Show. 114 00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:40,240 Speaker 5: Hi. 115 00:05:40,279 --> 00:05:41,520 Speaker 4: Ella, I'm mean I'm here too. 116 00:05:42,600 --> 00:05:42,760 Speaker 5: Hi. 117 00:05:43,600 --> 00:05:44,080 Speaker 4: How are you? 118 00:05:44,920 --> 00:05:45,480 Speaker 5: I'm okay? 119 00:05:45,560 --> 00:05:47,440 Speaker 4: How are you good? Do you ever listen to the 120 00:05:47,440 --> 00:05:48,039 Speaker 4: show at all? 121 00:05:48,800 --> 00:05:49,960 Speaker 5: Uh? Not really? 122 00:05:50,839 --> 00:05:54,240 Speaker 4: Okay? Well, maybe do that from time to time. It'd 123 00:05:54,279 --> 00:05:54,560 Speaker 4: be cool. 124 00:05:55,040 --> 00:05:58,400 Speaker 2: Also, no pressure if you haven't, we do a segment 125 00:05:58,440 --> 00:05:58,880 Speaker 2: on our show. 126 00:05:58,880 --> 00:06:00,279 Speaker 4: It's called the First Date fall Up. 127 00:06:00,320 --> 00:06:01,599 Speaker 2: That's where if you go out on a date with 128 00:06:01,640 --> 00:06:04,839 Speaker 2: somebody and then end up ghosting them, that person can 129 00:06:04,880 --> 00:06:06,840 Speaker 2: email us to get you on the phone and ask 130 00:06:06,880 --> 00:06:10,000 Speaker 2: why you're ghosting them. So, oh my gosh, we got 131 00:06:10,080 --> 00:06:12,440 Speaker 2: an email about you. 132 00:06:12,440 --> 00:06:14,760 Speaker 4: You're kidding, No, I'm not. 133 00:06:14,880 --> 00:06:18,040 Speaker 2: Do you know who would email us? I have an 134 00:06:18,080 --> 00:06:20,360 Speaker 2: idea you want to take a guess? 135 00:06:22,560 --> 00:06:23,200 Speaker 5: Is it Ryan? 136 00:06:24,160 --> 00:06:29,200 Speaker 4: Yes? It is Ryan. Hilarious emailed us. 137 00:06:29,240 --> 00:06:30,800 Speaker 2: We talked to him. He told us about your date. 138 00:06:30,880 --> 00:06:32,560 Speaker 2: He said he really liked you a lot, but he 139 00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:35,360 Speaker 2: doesn't know why you're ghosting him, and would you mind 140 00:06:35,360 --> 00:06:35,840 Speaker 2: telling us? 141 00:06:36,440 --> 00:06:40,800 Speaker 5: Oh, I feel really awkward about this. I'm not gonna lie. 142 00:06:41,800 --> 00:06:44,159 Speaker 4: Okay, this is the same space. 143 00:06:46,080 --> 00:06:48,000 Speaker 5: Okay. I mean I thought he was great. We had 144 00:06:48,040 --> 00:06:52,680 Speaker 5: a great time. It was very sparky. I mean, I 145 00:06:52,720 --> 00:06:57,240 Speaker 5: don't know how much he told you. But so I'm 146 00:06:57,240 --> 00:07:02,039 Speaker 5: recently divorced and we do it having a great night. 147 00:07:02,240 --> 00:07:07,240 Speaker 5: And I guess what, I'm honest, Like, I got on 148 00:07:07,320 --> 00:07:11,320 Speaker 5: Instagram while he was in the bathroom and I saw 149 00:07:11,360 --> 00:07:15,720 Speaker 5: a picture of my ex with his new girlfriend. Oh, 150 00:07:15,760 --> 00:07:18,600 Speaker 5: and I guess I just got kind of in my 151 00:07:18,680 --> 00:07:23,600 Speaker 5: feels about it, and I feel like maybe my mood 152 00:07:23,680 --> 00:07:26,720 Speaker 5: kind of wrecked the night. It kind of just made 153 00:07:26,760 --> 00:07:29,680 Speaker 5: me realize, like, oh, maybe I'm not as ready as 154 00:07:29,680 --> 00:07:32,720 Speaker 5: I thought I was. I should have handled those very differently, 155 00:07:33,360 --> 00:07:36,840 Speaker 5: but I don't know. I'm kind of new at this 156 00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:38,640 Speaker 5: and thought run away. 157 00:07:40,760 --> 00:07:44,280 Speaker 1: Your instinct started to run. I mean, yeah, that's hard. 158 00:07:44,320 --> 00:07:46,200 Speaker 1: That's a lot to process all at the same time. 159 00:07:47,240 --> 00:07:49,760 Speaker 5: Yeah, and I feel bad. He seems like a nice guy. 160 00:07:49,840 --> 00:07:51,400 Speaker 5: I mean, we really did hit it off. 161 00:07:52,680 --> 00:07:55,360 Speaker 2: So you're ghosting because you saw a picture of your 162 00:07:55,840 --> 00:07:56,520 Speaker 2: X with somebody. 163 00:07:57,160 --> 00:07:59,880 Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean I'm ghosting because I think I'm like, 164 00:08:00,040 --> 00:08:02,480 Speaker 5: oh god, am I actually ready to be jumping back 165 00:08:02,520 --> 00:08:05,520 Speaker 5: out there? If this silly picture threw me off so hard? 166 00:08:05,640 --> 00:08:06,080 Speaker 5: I don't know. 167 00:08:06,480 --> 00:08:08,280 Speaker 1: I mean, whether you're ready or not. I think those 168 00:08:08,320 --> 00:08:10,760 Speaker 1: types of pictures throw anybody off their game. Like, even 169 00:08:10,760 --> 00:08:13,040 Speaker 1: if you were already moved on in another relationship, seeing 170 00:08:13,080 --> 00:08:14,840 Speaker 1: it for the first time, I would imagine it's still 171 00:08:14,880 --> 00:08:15,600 Speaker 1: kind of shocking. 172 00:08:15,880 --> 00:08:17,840 Speaker 4: No, like, jobble, don't you feel that way? 173 00:08:18,080 --> 00:08:21,320 Speaker 2: No, I never care. Oh, okay, I'm glad. Usually okay, 174 00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:22,720 Speaker 2: I'm like good, they've moved on. 175 00:08:23,280 --> 00:08:27,680 Speaker 1: Well, I understand and I feel the same way. But 176 00:08:28,160 --> 00:08:30,560 Speaker 1: what I'm saying is maybe that doesn't mean you're not ready, 177 00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:32,840 Speaker 1: It's just that you needed to rip the band aid off. 178 00:08:34,559 --> 00:08:38,040 Speaker 5: I mean, yeah, maybe, I mean the phone was taken 179 00:08:38,040 --> 00:08:43,120 Speaker 5: by a friend of ours who she's meeting our old friends. Like, 180 00:08:43,720 --> 00:08:45,400 Speaker 5: I don't know, it just threw me. 181 00:08:46,200 --> 00:08:47,640 Speaker 4: Okay, it wasn't fair Ryan. 182 00:08:48,480 --> 00:08:51,600 Speaker 2: Well you can say that to Ryan if you want to, 183 00:08:51,640 --> 00:08:54,240 Speaker 2: because he's actually on the phone listening and wants to 184 00:08:54,280 --> 00:08:56,959 Speaker 2: talk to you. 185 00:08:58,360 --> 00:08:58,640 Speaker 5: Sure. 186 00:09:00,440 --> 00:09:03,960 Speaker 3: Hey, hey, Ella, I I uh, I don't care. I mean, 187 00:09:04,000 --> 00:09:06,400 Speaker 3: I totally get it that you were you were caught 188 00:09:06,440 --> 00:09:10,040 Speaker 3: off guard, and uh, I don't think it ruined the 189 00:09:10,160 --> 00:09:11,960 Speaker 3: night at all. I'm I'm relieved. 190 00:09:11,960 --> 00:09:16,959 Speaker 5: Frankly, I'm sorry that was not the most mature way 191 00:09:16,960 --> 00:09:19,560 Speaker 5: to handle that. I did not mean to make your 192 00:09:19,880 --> 00:09:22,160 Speaker 5: or feel bad. I know you're kind of in the 193 00:09:22,200 --> 00:09:24,840 Speaker 5: same position. Yeah, exactly. 194 00:09:24,920 --> 00:09:27,880 Speaker 3: I mean, I I totally I understand where you're coming from. 195 00:09:27,920 --> 00:09:30,079 Speaker 3: And you know, I mean, if. 196 00:09:29,880 --> 00:09:31,520 Speaker 5: We if we were able. 197 00:09:31,280 --> 00:09:35,240 Speaker 3: To like hang out again, like you you'd be welcome to, 198 00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:37,280 Speaker 3: you know, talk about this type of stuff, like we 199 00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:39,640 Speaker 3: can totally talk it out. 200 00:09:39,960 --> 00:09:42,600 Speaker 4: Really well, Ella, would you like to go out with Ryan? 201 00:09:42,640 --> 00:09:45,680 Speaker 4: Again on another date. We'll pay for it, I mean yeah, 202 00:09:45,760 --> 00:09:46,440 Speaker 4: I'd love to. 203 00:09:47,760 --> 00:09:48,240 Speaker 5: Amazing. 204 00:09:49,200 --> 00:09:51,079 Speaker 4: Congratulations, y got another date. 205 00:09:51,360 --> 00:09:54,920 Speaker 5: Yay, we can still do the bike ride. 206 00:09:54,920 --> 00:10:01,480 Speaker 3: And then we'll we'll we'll go to another restaurant. 207 00:10:02,040 --> 00:10:02,240 Speaker 1: Or not. 208 00:10:05,000 --> 00:10:06,720 Speaker 4: Juble's first date follow up