Speaker 1: My guest today is Eliza Schlessinger, comedian and writer. You've
Speaker 1: probably seen Eliza's hilarious stand up specials on Netflix or
Speaker 1: her movie Good on Paper, So I was really excited
Speaker 1: to have a conversation with Eliza and see what she's
Speaker 1: like offstage. Today we talk about comedy in the era
Speaker 1: of cancel culture, the ups and downs being a comedian,
Speaker 1: and so much more. Enjoy Did I meet you in
Speaker 1: a comedy club ever? Or no?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 1: And you starting Good on Paper which did really well
Speaker 1: on Netflix.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I wrote it all came from a general meeting
Speaker 2: several years ago. And you know, you don't get very
Speaker 2: many yeses, like concrete yeses in this business. And even
Speaker 2: when he gave me yes, I was like, okay, and
Speaker 2: then hello and behold we made it happen.
Speaker 1: It's amazing. I know, Hi. I mean, I am a
Speaker 1: beauty influencer on the side now, as you know, and
Speaker 1: it's really on the side, like I have another whole
Speaker 1: business that's not that because I don't wear makeup, as
Speaker 1: you can see at this time.
Speaker 2: I wrestle with that. I was like, am I putting
Speaker 2: on makeup for a podcast? And I've been not doing
Speaker 2: it because chances are you and I were both doing
Speaker 2: something before this. Also, like I just keep I was connected,
Speaker 2: Like what are we doing here? Like? Am I trying
Speaker 2: to convince the world that I have like a flawless
Speaker 2: Instagram tune face, Like I don't care who's not on
Speaker 2: by to see me.
Speaker 1: I have no mad Yeah, I mean I want to
Speaker 1: look fresh, and you know, I'll put I might. This
Speaker 1: might get posted on social, but I'm out of here.
Speaker 1: I don't care either. I'm the same as that way.
Speaker 1: I was just saying in a rant that I am
Speaker 1: not a vain person, and I would like to be
Speaker 1: slightly more vain. So then when shico sideways, I could
Speaker 1: at least look at my face and tell myself what's wrong,
Speaker 1: because no one else is going to tell me.
Speaker 2: But that's right, no one else will ever say, especially
Speaker 2: in La, no one else will ever tell you what's wrong.
Speaker 3: I called my agent. I'm like, am I weird looking?
Speaker 2: Is that what?
Speaker 1: I didn't get it?
Speaker 3: They were like, no, they love you.
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh right, I love but I've seen your
Speaker 2: on TikTok or is it Instagram reels? You're like You're like,
Speaker 2: I'm calling them, like six second beauty reviews. You're like,
Speaker 2: I got this a Walgreens crap. Next thing, I got this,
Speaker 2: call me, I have a billion dollars. This is a dollar.
Speaker 2: I love it. Next like it's super low fi. I'm like,
Speaker 2: I'm sure people are sitting there like writing down.
Speaker 1: I know. No, everyone's like not me at CBS dot
Speaker 1: dot dog it's really fun. I enjoy it.
Speaker 2: I don't.
Speaker 1: I didn't know how to do my makeup before January. First,
Speaker 1: I decided to learn about it and I just did
Speaker 1: this weird thing and now it's a thing. It's like
Speaker 1: a thing thing, you know, it's funny. I was talking
Speaker 1: to Toe for Grace the other day about like levels
Speaker 1: of fame. He's the best levels of fame where you're famous,
Speaker 1: but like you still can have a life and you
Speaker 1: can go out and you're like, you know, are you niche?
Speaker 1: I'm niche? Like, so I was wondering if, like how
Speaker 1: famous are you? What is your life in LA? And
Speaker 1: let's do LA and then let's do the like the
Speaker 1: rest of the country, Like how on a one to
Speaker 1: ten if Madonna's a ten or if Tom Cruise is
Speaker 1: a ten or Kim Kardashians a ten and your you know,
Speaker 1: high school gym teacher is a zero. How famous are
Speaker 1: you in your mind? Like with reality, like people coming
Speaker 1: on your mind saying or I was saying I saw
Speaker 1: your Netflix special or all that stuff.
Speaker 2: I think if you have to ask how famous are you,
Speaker 2: it kind of answers the question. And I also think
Speaker 2: there's famous within certain groups. You know, like you were
Speaker 2: on Real Housewives. But you're a business woman, so that
Speaker 2: tends to permeate other circles that a woman with like
Speaker 2: a bullshit fashion line may not.
Speaker 1: Well you also, but yeah, you've been in movies, you're
Speaker 1: in a Netflix special. So I'm asking you, like a
Speaker 1: food fair, if you go to a mall, are you
Speaker 1: going to be bothered or you can have boence.
Speaker 3: It Bothered isn't the word, but you know, people come
Speaker 3: up to you.
Speaker 2: I mean, I'm not gonna list off like in the
Speaker 2: past twenty four hours, who all?
Speaker 3: But it's usually like it's usually.
Speaker 2: A girl will just be like are you and I'll
Speaker 2: be like.
Speaker 3: It's me and then they get excited, or a.
Speaker 2: Dude will be like, oh do you know the three
Speaker 2: other male comics? Awzoom. It happens, but you have to
Speaker 2: be at a serious level of fame for it to
Speaker 2: actually be a hassle like right, and and there are
Speaker 2: people that call like paparazzo in themselves.
Speaker 3: It's never been a bother.
Speaker 2: Has it been creepy at times, sure, but it's never
Speaker 2: like please my family and I just want to eat
Speaker 2: at all of garden and privacy. Please.
Speaker 1: So it's a nice level. So you have a nice
Speaker 1: like it's a little sizzle, but you could have your
Speaker 1: own life and have be annoyed if you're walking through
Speaker 1: an airport.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's no annoyance because also, I don't know, I
Speaker 2: think people forget in this day and age, like especially
Speaker 2: as a stand up as a performer, like you have
Speaker 2: nothing without your fans. This isn't based on anything else.
Speaker 2: This isn't like you put money in.
Speaker 3: The market and that's what did it.
Speaker 2: Like you should be respectful of the fact that these
Speaker 2: people take time and money out of their lives to
Speaker 2: support your selfish art.
Speaker 3: You know, so I always you always give them time
Speaker 3: to day.
Speaker 1: Absolutely, Why did you say selfish art?
Speaker 2: Because stand up is this your if you're a performer,
Speaker 2: you know this comes from a place like hey, I
Speaker 2: need you to look at me and hear what I'm
Speaker 2: saying it's not like I'm a doctor or I'm doing
Speaker 2: humanitarian aide. Okay, no, Like at the end of the night,
Speaker 2: it's stand up.
Speaker 1: So do you feel like you're a comedian first and
Speaker 1: foremost and that was what you wanted to be or
Speaker 1: you wanted you saw the whole board and you wanted
Speaker 1: to do that, and you wanted to write, and you
Speaker 1: wanted to be in movies, Like what was the trajectory
Speaker 1: in your mind?
Speaker 2: I was always going to be funny for a living.
Speaker 2: And when you grow up somewhere like Dallas, Texas, like
Speaker 2: there's no trajectory because there's no path. It's like, oh,
Speaker 2: I'll just be on Saturday Night Live like everybody right,
Speaker 2: unaware of all the avenues, you know. And of course
Speaker 2: the Internet didn't exist back then, which is so I'm
Speaker 2: loath to say. And so when I started doing stand
Speaker 2: up that I got the most energy from doing it
Speaker 2: that way. And then you know, you audition for stuff,
Speaker 2: but there are people who put in ten thousand hours
Speaker 2: and really work at auditioning, and I'm putting in that
Speaker 2: time and stand up and it's leading to its own thing.
Speaker 2: So I always wanted to be funny for a living.
Speaker 2: And sometimes that's in stand up, sometimes it's in a movie,
Speaker 2: sometimes it's in writing. You know, as an artist, you
Speaker 2: just want to keep creating and affecting people. And I
Speaker 2: don't I don't know that our world allows for that
Speaker 2: understanding sometimes.
Speaker 1: But yeah, and your trajectory was getting up on stage
Speaker 1: in Dallas, like open mic nights and.
Speaker 2: Taking no no. I went to school in Boston and
Speaker 2: I went to film school like everybody else, like every
Speaker 2: intern in your office. And I got to LA and
Speaker 2: I started doing it there. And I started, like two
Speaker 2: thousand and five with a like with a real job,
Speaker 2: Like I had an office job. I was someone's terrible assistant.
Speaker 2: But this is something you know, you talk about side
Speaker 2: hustles that I would go and do at night. And
Speaker 2: then one day I called my mom and I said
Speaker 2: I need to borrow one thousand dollars so I can
Speaker 2: purchase a computer and I'm going to try this full time.
Speaker 2: And it worked out, and so here we are at
Speaker 2: thirty nine.
Speaker 1: So you got the hit, you liked it, and you
Speaker 1: started doing it like every just going every night and
Speaker 1: then traveling and then doing that whole circuit.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, there is no so people always ask
Speaker 2: advice like it's you got to just do it. It's
Speaker 2: not unlike being an entrepreneur like you have to or
Speaker 2: being a bodybuilder, like you have to just do it.
Speaker 1: It's being a it's being somebody who's in a kitchen
Speaker 1: actually because you have to make a recipe, screw it
Speaker 1: up and again, like you have to keep going. It's
Speaker 1: repetition and keep going through and trying different ways. It's interesting,
Speaker 1: my head is.
Speaker 2: A chef and it's and you know, so there is
Speaker 2: there's my husband's chef. So we initially bonded over the
Speaker 2: fact that we both you know, work at night, but
Speaker 2: there is I don't think people understand when you're building
Speaker 2: something like it is something that you it wakes you
Speaker 2: up at night.
Speaker 3: You love it so much even when it's the most painful,
Speaker 3: and you.
Speaker 2: Just keep going. And it's not even about if people
Speaker 2: encourage you or they're shitty to you. It's only what
Speaker 2: matters is the voice in your head and just going
Speaker 2: and taking every opportunity. And and then when you get
Speaker 2: rejected writing a movie and you're off time writing a.
Speaker 1: Book, well it's funny because I don't know if everybody
Speaker 1: listening realizes how insanely competitive and crowded. It is because
Speaker 1: I've met so much any successful comedians, whether it's Kim
Speaker 1: Whitley or Charad Small's or you know a lot of
Speaker 1: people who have popped off, but not like you know
Speaker 1: to like Robin Williams level. I mean, I know Kevin Neelan,
Speaker 1: I know Chris Rock. For some reason, I know a
Speaker 1: lot of the comedy people I'm attracted to that I
Speaker 1: took classes in Groundlings. I know Amy Schumer. Like I
Speaker 1: don't know why I've always gravitated towards the comedy space.
Speaker 1: I mean probably because as a kid, I was watching
Speaker 1: you know, Eddie Murphy and watching Richard Pryor, and I
Speaker 1: said I'll go up and do stand up, which was
Speaker 1: like why did I just say that out loud? And
Speaker 1: I did it at New York Comedy Club ten days later.
Speaker 1: After calling some of these people that I told you about,
Speaker 1: like Bridge it Ever, calling Kathy Griffin, I called every
Speaker 1: ellen to ask like what tips everybody had, and each
Speaker 1: person had very different tips, like no two were the same,
Speaker 1: and it was like I was crowdsourcing to figure out
Speaker 1: how I would do it. I think it was Kim
Speaker 1: Whitley or Kevin. I think it was Kim Whitley who
Speaker 1: decided or asked me, like what was my style? Like
Speaker 1: she was like or Kevin might have asked that, but
Speaker 1: she said, you're you rant, like you just are aggravated
Speaker 1: about something. You need to say it. And then and
Speaker 1: we were talking. I was talking to Kevin Neale about
Speaker 1: how he is more like it's a long story that
Speaker 1: just keeps going on and that builds up, and so
Speaker 1: I had never thought of that. I wanted to say,
Speaker 1: like a what is your style? And second of all,
Speaker 1: I didn't get I did fairly like people laughed. It
Speaker 1: wasn't a bomb at all like it was once at
Speaker 1: ten I was probably six, you know, like zero being
Speaker 1: no one laughing to ten like being caughugh like crazy
Speaker 1: raucous laughter. But I didn't get any sort of like, wow,
Speaker 1: I'd survived that and that was good, and I would
Speaker 1: want to I need to do that again. I didn't
Speaker 1: have that. For some reason. I felt that it was
Speaker 1: like that's a lot obviously to be sitting there and
Speaker 1: like your goal is to get fed from these people,
Speaker 1: and if they don't feed you, like you're hungry or
Speaker 1: like you didn't get what you needed and I found
Speaker 1: that to be really interesting. I want to know what
Speaker 1: you think about that, and that like that thought that
Speaker 1: I felt.
Speaker 2: There's a couple of things. You know, you built up
Speaker 2: a reputation, you have a brand. I want to make
Speaker 2: sure that everybody who comes to my show they're always
Speaker 2: leading uplifted, even though we're calling out some major inconvenient
Speaker 2: truths about our society and things like that. And you know,
Speaker 2: I also like to get into the idea that we
Speaker 2: tend to get angry when women have a very strong opinion.
Speaker 2: We only call women bossy or opinionated, you know, And
Speaker 2: I reject all of that. I'm like, you've got something
Speaker 2: to say, you back it up with intelligence and comedy,
Speaker 2: and men will want to listen to that as well.
Speaker 2: And so that's what my stand up is. You know,
Speaker 2: there are rants at times. It comes from a very
Speaker 2: specific point of view. I think it's its own unique
Speaker 2: thing and it's hyper energetic. The feedback that I get
Speaker 2: is it's less about how I see it, more about
Speaker 2: people see it. People leave feeling seen, and I think
Speaker 2: I do stand up to feel seen and feel heard.
Speaker 2: And I always kind of want to take up for
Speaker 2: people who maybe don't feel they have the license to
Speaker 2: say something. You always have to wrap your agenda with humor,
Speaker 2: any lessons, any morals, because I think the stakes are
Speaker 2: too high in our society to not be saying something.
Speaker 2: When you have a microphone and say, thirty five hundred
Speaker 2: people and an arena in Ottawa, you've got to say something.
Speaker 1: Does it feel strange to you? Like it's funny? Because
Speaker 1: I saw Amy Schumer in the Hampton's at this bizarre
Speaker 1: event that I was texting her about afterwards because it
Speaker 1: was crazy and I can't believe some of the situations
Speaker 1: you guys get yourselves into where you have to perform.
Speaker 1: She's performing effectively on an airstrip, like with air like
Speaker 1: at an airport in the in the woods.
Speaker 2: So she probably got so much money. I have played.
Speaker 2: I do a lot of shows for our troops, so
Speaker 2: like I've done a lot of USO. So that is
Speaker 2: it's three in the afternoon, you are playing for one
Speaker 2: hundred troops plus the Afghan troops on a deck at
Speaker 2: a fob and the sun is hot. You are playing.
Speaker 2: I shot Elder Millennial, one of my specials on an
Speaker 2: aircraft carrier. I did me and end up in Kathy
Speaker 2: Hilton's backyard recently, like the check clears, we go no, no.
Speaker 1: No, I exactly and I just I texted, I can't
Speaker 1: imagine there has to be if you didn't get paid X,
Speaker 1: I said, it wasn't worth it. They were moving pieces
Speaker 1: of large pieces of furniture in front of me while
Speaker 1: she's performing, like fifty fifty miles away. They put us
Speaker 1: so far from her that if I was on fire,
Speaker 1: Amy Schumer wouldn't have been able to see me so
Speaker 1: much less hear my laughter. Like let's put the comedian
Speaker 1: on an eye light there. They can't hear us laugh
Speaker 1: or engage, and an.
Speaker 2: Air respect given to stand up. It's basically like at
Speaker 2: an event, they're like, we'll do the eulogy and then
Speaker 2: we'll put up the comedian, right, Like it doesn't even
Speaker 2: matter how famous you are, or if you're a man
Speaker 2: or a woman. I did a corporate event one time.
Speaker 2: I don't remember the name of the company. It was
Speaker 2: some company that you've never heard of. It was in Vegas,
Speaker 2: and it was so much money, and it was all
Speaker 2: the different branches of the company from all over the world.
Speaker 2: And I'm up there and I start talking and a
Speaker 2: band just starts playing over me, and I was like,
Speaker 2: you know what, it's your time and whatever you guys want,
Speaker 2: let's get the show started. Like you can't could all
Speaker 2: these things. You're just like, I mean, you there some gigs,
Speaker 2: it's just you kind of go on autopilot. You're like,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna hit my marks, I'm gonna finish these jokes.
Speaker 2: I might do some crowd work, and time is up.
Speaker 2: I will see you at the bank and.
Speaker 1: Thick Skin piece out. Don't give a good fuck even
Speaker 1: if these five because people thought you sucked, because you
Speaker 1: set up so for failure.
Speaker 3: I guarantee it's not even that you suck. It's that
Speaker 3: they didn't even know you were there or we have
Speaker 3: Oh that's better.
Speaker 2: Well, you always have to remember to never negate the
Speaker 2: fact that there are people who can hear you, who.
Speaker 3: Are having fun, and so what you don't want to
Speaker 3: do is be like this suck.
Speaker 2: You guys are listening because the twenty people in front
Speaker 2: are like, don't we count you? Know?
Speaker 3: So again, it's all about user experience.
Speaker 2: I want the audience to have from the playlist I
Speaker 2: put together to the last meet and greet, like I
Speaker 2: want people to know that I respect their money and
Speaker 2: their time, and that we're putting on a real show.
Speaker 2: I put on like I don't ever drink before a show.
Speaker 2: I come out there. I do my full time. A
Speaker 2: lot of comics, don't you know, Or it's a hassle.
Speaker 2: I never want people to feel that I don't respect
Speaker 2: that they've made that effort, you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and are you able to turn it off? Or
Speaker 1: all day? Anything that's funny gets written down in that book.
Speaker 1: Anything all day that it's funny that you think about,
Speaker 1: you have to write it down because it's part Yeah, but.
Speaker 2: It's not this like compulsory thing where you're just like,
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, mister president, please, I need to write this
Speaker 2: thing down about it? Right? No, I do you have it?
Speaker 2: You know, you've got little bits of paper, You've got thoughts,
Speaker 2: and sometimes it goes in the iPhone and then there
Speaker 2: are weeks that go by where nothing gets written down.
Speaker 3: Like I'm a big believer in like periods of intake.
Speaker 2: Sometimes you just have to exist as an entity on
Speaker 2: this planet and just if it hits you, yeah, let
Speaker 2: it breathe or just be a person. It's gonna I mean,
Speaker 2: I go up enough that like you're always working on something.
Speaker 2: I do all my writing on stage. I don't sit
Speaker 2: it a computer and write it out.
Speaker 1: So wait, what does that mean?
Speaker 3: Like I write jokes, I write them as I say them.
Speaker 2: I go on stage and I just talk about a thing,
Speaker 2: or I'll think of a tag, or I'll improvise off
Speaker 2: of that, and then I'll remember what I said and
Speaker 2: that becomes the act. I don't sit it a computer
Speaker 2: and think like what would be funny and write it out.
Speaker 1: Right right right? That makes sense. That makes sense. You're
Speaker 1: like free associating and improvising and then you structure it afterwards.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean you have jokes and you know, but
Speaker 2: that's like I was saying, like every joke is a
Speaker 2: little different each time, and sometimes an audience give you something,
Speaker 2: sometimes they don't, and I believe what works always stick,
Speaker 2: so it's all completely memorized. Nothing's written down. That's what.
Speaker 1: Well, what I think is interesting is when I was
Speaker 1: doing this that one time, and it's something I've always
Speaker 1: wanted to do, like it was just something that bothered
Speaker 1: me because I'm not the person that wants to do
Speaker 1: something and then is afraid to do it. So that
Speaker 1: was part of the reason that I did it, and
Speaker 1: everyone said, oh, I'd be great at that, or I
Speaker 1: want to do that like every person. It's real and
Speaker 1: it's that that would be irritating if I were you
Speaker 1: know what I mean, because my Matt Klarberg and Barry Clarberg,
Speaker 1: my business managers at the time, are like, oh, yeah, no,
Speaker 1: i'd be great. Everyone says i'd be great. Because then
Speaker 1: when I teach my class, I'm like, okay, so get
Speaker 1: up if I can do it too.
Speaker 3: Like that week, it's always i'd be great at that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because you did amitst for speech that was good
Speaker 1: last year and frankly only four of the jokes were good.
Speaker 1: But and that week I had a week of being
Speaker 1: you because that one week I was like, well, I'm
Speaker 1: the one is gonna fucking get up in the real
Speaker 1: comedy club in a pandemic when people are six feet
Speaker 1: away in masks and there only were allowed to be
Speaker 1: fifteen people the first day they opened up at the
Speaker 1: New York Comedy Club, and so get up too. Make
Speaker 1: me feel better because then I'll feel like because they
Speaker 1: made it like what I was doing that week wasn't
Speaker 1: a thing. So I thought that was interesting but more
Speaker 1: important than my stupid experience that everyone thinks they could
Speaker 1: do it and forget whether someone could be good or not.
Speaker 1: But why is everyone afraid to stand up? And like
Speaker 1: why is it so scary? What is so scary? If
Speaker 1: one make fools themselves every day? Like why is that
Speaker 1: so scary? Why is it dying? As easy? Comedy as hard?
Speaker 2: Public speaking? Obviously everyone knows is like the number one fear.
Speaker 2: Nobody wants to be ridiculed, nobody wants to be judged,
Speaker 2: nobody wants to be laughed at in a bad way,
Speaker 2: nobody wants to be embarrassed, and nobody wants to be vulnerable.
Speaker 2: It is an incredibly vulnerable thing. And so it's like
Speaker 2: laying all of your fears and insecurities bear, And the
Speaker 2: beauty of it is saying, please laugh at me, because
Speaker 2: when they are laughing with you.
Speaker 3: I always say that people laugh at something for two reasons.
Speaker 2: Either they totally get it and they feel you or
Speaker 2: they're like, that's so weird, what are you talking about?
Speaker 2: And I always I believe that the comedy God's reward vulnerability.
Speaker 2: The more honest you are about your experience without trying
Speaker 2: to look cute or clever, like, the more just gut
Speaker 2: wrenchingly honest you are. That's what people women in particular, like,
Speaker 2: that's what people resonate with. That's when someone says, oh
Speaker 2: my god, because stand up is meant to be consumed
Speaker 2: in the dark with alcohol, because it's this like delicious,
Speaker 2: revealing sort of sadistic thing. And when someone gets up
Speaker 2: there and they come into the light, there's a reason
Speaker 2: the audience is in the dark, and they bear their soul.
Speaker 2: They say something like, I'm getting ready for a date.
Speaker 2: I have to shave my big toe because I'm wearing sandals.
Speaker 3: Every woman in that.
Speaker 2: Audience is like, oh my god, I do it too, especially,
Speaker 2: and I talk about this a lot in my New
Speaker 2: Hour especially. There's so much shame around being a woman,
Speaker 2: and so much we don't tell each other, and not
Speaker 2: because we're mean, but because we've been taught to be embarrassed.
Speaker 2: So when another girl gets up there and says something honest,
Speaker 2: you get to feel seen as a woman. When you
Speaker 2: know that someone else has gone what you've gone through,
Speaker 2: what you've gone through, it is incredibly uplifting. And we
Speaker 2: all look for reflections of ourselves in media in other people,
Speaker 2: and some people it's the most impactful with a comic.
Speaker 1: But what you said translates so much further than just
Speaker 1: in comedy that if you're just vulnerable and honest, you know,
Speaker 1: without it being canned. And I think a lot of
Speaker 1: times now in social media, people are trying to be
Speaker 1: so honest in a way that is designed for people
Speaker 1: to feel like sorry for them. And I think that's
Speaker 1: different than what you're saying. You're saying just truly.
Speaker 3: I thought authenticity, you know exactly.
Speaker 1: I also think and commitment, like I remember or I've seen,
Speaker 1: you know, when you see kids do a talent show
Speaker 1: or something like a second I gotta start again, like
Speaker 1: we start again, like I wasn't any or like it's
Speaker 1: that it's Cameron Diaz in that movie in my best
Speaker 1: friend's wedding, when she was the worst at the karaoke
Speaker 1: but she just committed. I think commitment gets you.
Speaker 2: A really think. I think it also helps to look
Speaker 2: like Cameron Diaz, Like people were like, oh, you accidentally
Speaker 2: ran me over.
Speaker 3: It's okay, you're stunning.
Speaker 1: Right, No, but no, look, Amy Schumer's beautiful, but Diaz
Speaker 1: was a model. But Amy Schumer committed in the movie
Speaker 1: that movie was it? What was I feel pretty. When
Speaker 1: she got up in that strip tease, she committed. She
Speaker 1: was a disaster, but she committed. I'm saying, I think
Speaker 1: commitment in comedy and in life goes a long way
Speaker 1: being just like dedicated to what you're doing.
Speaker 2: Well.
Speaker 1: People are being so people are being similar to that
Speaker 1: on social media though, which is why I find it interesting,
Speaker 1: Like people, Oh, is it being so that people? It's
Speaker 1: so immediate, so raw, like because you're saying right, then
Speaker 1: you're exposed and it's so vulnerunerable. And other places people
Speaker 1: will just say something and then walk away from it
Speaker 1: because it's not so like the person's not right in
Speaker 1: front of you, not laughing. That's what I'm saying, Like
Speaker 1: it's so just, it's so like there's no middleman. You're
Speaker 1: not just putting it up somewhere, you're not posting it.
Speaker 1: It's not in a movie. It's you and the audience.
Speaker 2: There's no literally no filter, like there's literally and you
Speaker 2: know that's why there's different social media too, Like Instagram
Speaker 2: is very different than TikTok, which is hyper raw, hyper honest,
Speaker 2: and they want that experience that generation does because I
Speaker 2: just obsessively watch both. But that's why you know, people
Speaker 2: are very brave in a comment section, people are very brave.
Speaker 2: It's very easy to come out and call someone a
Speaker 2: name or say they did something wrong. It's very easy
Speaker 2: to do.
Speaker 3: That behind the anonimity of a handle.
Speaker 2: So that's why you can't really argue with the comment section,
Speaker 2: because who the fuck is that person? And for better
Speaker 2: or for worse, stand up comics have the guts to
Speaker 2: say what they want to say and stand there in
Speaker 2: front of strangers, and and you take that risk because
Speaker 2: you know that what you have to say, at least
Speaker 2: for me, there's an honesty and a beauty behind it,
Speaker 2: and you're coming from a good place.
Speaker 1: Well, let's talk about comedy that lands and doesn't. And
Speaker 1: that could be the difference between cancelation and not. I mean,
Speaker 1: by many other people's definitions, Dave Chappelle would have been
Speaker 1: canceled ten times because of the things that he is
Speaker 1: capable of saying, because he's such a wordsmith and a
Speaker 1: craftsman and just like probably that to me is probably
Speaker 1: the best ever. He's like amazing male comedian, even rivaling
Speaker 1: Eddie Murphy and and Richard Dreyfus. But other people, you know,
Speaker 1: Michael Richards, will be in you know, in a comedy
Speaker 1: club and say something and be canceled forever.
Speaker 2: These are two very different things. I mean, just in
Speaker 2: case your audience doesn't know, referring to when Michael Richards,
Speaker 2: who played Kramer couldn't handle a heckle, was at the
Speaker 2: laugh Factory, so I know what that crowd is, and
Speaker 2: he just went on a racist ran.
Speaker 3: He just kept saying and weord over and over.
Speaker 2: You can say things that are UNPC, but make sure
Speaker 2: it's funny.
Speaker 3: He wasn't saying a joke like you may as well
Speaker 3: just be on the street.
Speaker 2: So that's and that happens like that was just pure
Speaker 2: You lost your cool.
Speaker 1: I understand what you're saying. It wasn't part of an
Speaker 1: act that bombed. It wasn't part of it was a
Speaker 1: just a criticism. That's a great that's a great note.
Speaker 1: So Dave Chappelle is saying things within a context and
Speaker 1: crafting a story.
Speaker 2: And look, he gets faulted for saying things too. People
Speaker 2: get outraged. People are very protective over what they are everybody.
Speaker 2: Nobody has a problem laughing at everyone else. But when
Speaker 2: it's about you, oh it's about women, or it's about
Speaker 2: my ethnic group or my religion. Then people get very barbed,
Speaker 2: and I understand that without getting into specifically what Dave said.
Speaker 2: You know, I have my own thoughts about trans jokes,
Speaker 2: and I put them up there with oven jokes, like
Speaker 2: I don't like them. I don't do them. I don't
Speaker 2: think they're funny. That being said, if you got a
Speaker 2: good one, okay, But I always look at intention and context,
Speaker 2: you know, And I think we go around getting very
Speaker 2: upset without watching, without understanding those things, and people getting
Speaker 2: canceled up and right the market dictates, right the market.
Speaker 1: It's exactly what I've said things right now that a
Speaker 1: year ago I would have gotten destroyed, for I did
Speaker 1: get destroyed, and then said the same thing a year later.
Speaker 1: Timing the tides where people are, I think we're coming
Speaker 1: out of a time of hyper hyper sensitivity and entering
Speaker 1: a time of truth right now. I feel like there's
Speaker 1: a lot of truth telling right now, and people would
Speaker 1: rather see warts and all and unfiltered than saccer and
Speaker 1: fear based bullshit.
Speaker 2: I think it's then I gotta be like I believe
Speaker 2: in and overcorrect. So I'm okay with what has happened,
Speaker 2: because for so long it was just so unacceptable the
Speaker 2: way women were treated conversation about people of color, things
Speaker 2: like that get like certain words and slurs.
Speaker 3: I like these people that we have a voice.
Speaker 2: It was heard. But now as we come back to
Speaker 2: something in the middle, you know this outrage culture, you
Speaker 2: always have to look at who is outraged. And I
Speaker 2: always joke because I was going to make a TikTok
Speaker 2: about this, and I talked about this. I did a
Speaker 2: Netflix taping. White people are always trying to outwoke each other,
Speaker 2: hoping that like a black person will be like, wow,
Speaker 2: she gets it.
Speaker 3: They're not gonna You're not gonna get a gold star.
Speaker 2: So you, as a white woman flipping the fuck out
Speaker 2: about being anti racist on another white woman, it's just
Speaker 2: do the work, do the real voting, have the real conversations.
Speaker 2: But a lot of it I call it performative ethics.
Speaker 2: And this is not just white women. I'm just giving
Speaker 2: you an example. It's rarely about correction and education, and
Speaker 2: it's always about burning someone and canceling someone.
Speaker 3: It would be delicious. I sa one of your followers
Speaker 3: to find.
Speaker 2: You and be like Jethany Frankel said this about so
Speaker 2: and so, let's watch her burn versus.
Speaker 3: Privately dming you like, hey, Bethany, you said this one thing.
Speaker 2: I just want to let you know this affects these people,
Speaker 2: but nobody does that.
Speaker 1: Just say sorry, Everyone say I'm sorry, I fucked up,
Speaker 1: I did something wrong.
Speaker 2: Tell me this isn't wrong. But also, by the way,
Speaker 2: you notice, none of this is happening in a real space.
Speaker 2: This is all happening on like web free, like this
Speaker 2: is all happening in the comment section of an app.
Speaker 2: Nobody has the balls to see this person and say
Speaker 2: something to them in person because people are gutless and
Speaker 2: bored and on the toilet. That's what this is. It's
Speaker 2: easy to try to cancel someone because well I didn't.
Speaker 3: Like her and she offended me this one time, so
Speaker 3: she should burn because people are unhappy people.
Speaker 1: It's shot and fried. I agree if i'm I want
Speaker 1: to be doing that? Yeah, I agree, And they wait.
Speaker 1: And it's like a host and parasites that when something
Speaker 1: you do something wrong, all the parasites like flee to
Speaker 1: the host to like suck off the blood and literally
Speaker 1: the moment.
Speaker 3: All you have to do is either give it no
Speaker 3: oxygen or post something else, and the angry mob will
Speaker 3: pick up their pitchforks and they will go try to
Speaker 3: eat each other.
Speaker 1: Yes, there's a timing to it, because you can poke
Speaker 1: the bear, but there is like, yeah, yeah, you have to.
Speaker 1: You have to let it fucking breathe for a second too.
Speaker 1: It's it's insane when happens and you think it's real
Speaker 1: and it's usually not real, and brands are scared and
Speaker 1: it gets to be this crazy thing. But so how
Speaker 1: much what percentage of your life in creativity are you
Speaker 1: a little afraid? Like how much do you have to
Speaker 1: hold back? There's no way I can't speak for you.
Speaker 1: You saying every single thing that comes to your mind.
Speaker 1: You say it, no, no.
Speaker 2: But I do. I think it's not even about I'm
Speaker 2: not good at maths, So it's not about quantifying as
Speaker 2: much as when I have a thought, like what's the
Speaker 2: kernel of that thought? And then how do we contextualize
Speaker 2: it so that what I'm saying can have can be
Speaker 2: misconstrued the least you know, what's the right way to
Speaker 2: do this?
Speaker 3: Who do we talk to in this joke? What words
Speaker 3: do we choose?
Speaker 2: And that is when we get to the craft of
Speaker 2: stand up and of comedy, whether it's comedy writing too
Speaker 2: versus just being the funny friend because I'm not a
Speaker 2: fan of like, oh.
Speaker 3: I have no filter. I just say whatever.
Speaker 2: It's like, No, this is a crap, Like there's a
Speaker 2: reason you laugh at a joke and it's not an accident.
Speaker 2: It was the words chosen, the numbers chosen, Like there
Speaker 2: is an alchemy to this.
Speaker 1: No, yeah, of course.
Speaker 2: And so when you're making these points, you know, you
Speaker 2: can make a slop people of point where you can
Speaker 2: really hone in, Like the bad pitch is what I
Speaker 2: was talking about with the woke stuff. I'm like, it's
Speaker 2: a woke off. It's about being scared that you will
Speaker 2: be called racist. Sometimes it's not even about doing the work.
Speaker 2: It's just nobody wants to look bad, you know. So
Speaker 2: just being specific with your words, well that's.
Speaker 1: By the way, in every business meeting, in every deal,
Speaker 1: the truth is I have said things that could easily
Speaker 1: be said in another way. You just didn't catch it.
Speaker 1: You just you could get the same exact point across.
Speaker 1: And not everything needs to be said. Sometimes something's just
Speaker 1: bugging me, and I know I'm going to get slapped
Speaker 1: a little for it, but I want to say it.
Speaker 1: But how am I going to say it, you know,
Speaker 1: so I think that's important too.
Speaker 2: It's also you know, you're a woman, so whatever you
Speaker 2: say or don't say, cannon will be used against you.
Speaker 2: And so look, you take in all the stuff I
Speaker 2: write about this endlessly. You can't let it drive you crazy.
Speaker 2: You know. People could look at this conversation and be like,
Speaker 2: they're two women. They're talking too fast. You know. At
Speaker 2: the end of the day, we all just do our best,
Speaker 2: and we all forget that other people are doing their
Speaker 2: best and we're judging them. And so it really is like,
Speaker 2: how do you just like feel okay about yourself when
Speaker 2: you're not being told by others you're doing a good job.
Speaker 2: I don't have that answer. I feel bad a lot
Speaker 2: of times, but you just do it your best, you know.
Speaker 1: Well, yeah, in the words of Kathy Griffin, you can't
Speaker 1: be who you're not. But social media you nodded when
Speaker 1: I said it's not for therapy. Have you noticed what
Speaker 1: I've noticed. We've see people really emoting and I'm going
Speaker 1: through a really hard time right now, Like this is
Speaker 1: the worst it's ever been. This is my low and
Speaker 1: I'm like, why are you, like you're calling me when
Speaker 1: this is your low. We don't know each of them.
Speaker 2: I think there is that vulnerability and like I can't
Speaker 2: talk to the people around me, so I'm just gonna
Speaker 2: share with strangers because there is that lighter side where
Speaker 2: like strangers will give you that positivity.
Speaker 1: Your mother's gonna that's dangerous. That's a dangerous game.
Speaker 2: What's dangerous also is and I talk about this. I
Speaker 2: have a chapter in a book called everything is a Scam.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I say all the time, everything's a scam.
Speaker 1: That's that's always saying it's a scam.
Speaker 2: It's you're a New Yorker and I'm from New York,
Speaker 2: but I'm really but I was raised in Dallas, Texas,
Speaker 2: but I have that very East Coast everything's a scam.
Speaker 2: I just had to talk to an assistant who bought
Speaker 2: me travel insurance. I'm like, what is this eight hundred
Speaker 2: dollars and she was like, I didn't know. I'm like,
Speaker 2: you're just a baby. It's a scam. You know, we
Speaker 2: all want to help. I actually donated a lot to
Speaker 2: your charity because you were doing a lot of like
Speaker 2: boots on the groundwork in Ukraine. So I reposted your
Speaker 2: charity because like I don't know you, but I was like,
Speaker 2: I know her, I trust her. So I did, but
Speaker 2: I was like, I know that's not a scam. But
Speaker 2: a lot of times people post and like your heart,
Speaker 2: your heart hurts, and you're like, I want to help,
Speaker 2: And then you're like, how do I know this person's real?
Speaker 3: How do I know this is going to the right thing?
Speaker 2: How do I know this is not a bullshit charity?
Speaker 2: And so people are constantly reaching out and you're like,
Speaker 2: it's not that I don't want to help you, it's
Speaker 2: that I think you might be lying to me. And
Speaker 2: it love that.
Speaker 1: You're saying that, because I love that you're saying that,
Speaker 1: because in in philanthropy it is the most scam ridden
Speaker 1: place ever and it's a lot of celebrities posting links
Speaker 1: directing to other people that are controlling the entire charity,
Speaker 1: and they just post the link because it looks like
Speaker 1: you're the cue picture of a koala with oil on it,
Speaker 1: you know, from a spill.
Speaker 2: Then you get dinged, you know, you get dinged for
Speaker 2: how you participate and how you don't. So I post something,
Speaker 2: I'm like, you know, help the people of let's say Ukraine.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, So you don't care about these and
Speaker 2: these people. Oh you didn't do this, and you're just
Speaker 2: like or man, you do still have a business. I
Speaker 2: have a platform to talk about this because of comedy,
Speaker 2: So we do have to get back to that. So
Speaker 2: you post postpos in the next day, it's like, where's
Speaker 2: your posting about that?
Speaker 1: By the way, beyond like it makes us all have
Speaker 1: to be doing what we think we're supposed to be doing, right,
Speaker 1: versus what we're actually passionate about doing. Like I on
Speaker 1: the same day, let's say a week, I could raise
Speaker 1: a million dollars in a week with Ukraine, but also
Speaker 1: put on hair and makeup and eyelashes and sit down
Speaker 1: and do this podcast and also do something bank some
Speaker 1: superficial content. Now, I mean I post the superficial content
Speaker 1: that I'm banking because I know that that's like uote
Speaker 1: unquote tone death. But why I'm a mother and I work,
Speaker 1: I am, I have air mez bags and I send
Speaker 1: relief to Ukraine.
Speaker 3: Right, It's not like it's.
Speaker 2: Not like you're live streaming yourself from a funeral. Like
Speaker 2: you have a sense of decorm and you are a
Speaker 2: multifaceted person. Moreover, this is what is required of us
Speaker 2: in order to have the platform so that we can
Speaker 2: be judged, and so I would take it with a
Speaker 2: grain of salt, you know. And I usually it's ignore
Speaker 2: those people. But I even talk about it in my
Speaker 2: book How It's Why you can't live for other people.
Speaker 1: Now facts, because the truth is I talked about the
Speaker 1: luxury giveaway scams with and it was the week that
Speaker 1: the Ukraine War broke out, and for me, I was
Speaker 1: looking at Ukraine. So when I saw the Kim Kardashian
Speaker 1: million dollars in air mez and Gucci boxes, I was like,
Speaker 1: what the fuck? But she's doing what she does. She
Speaker 1: got paid probably a million dollars or twenty million dollars
Speaker 1: and she's doing what she did.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 1: I am in Ukraine.
Speaker 2: Not to pile on. I do think that family could
Speaker 2: stand to do a little bit more public facing, but they.
Speaker 1: Could be it's for the reason that it's bullshit.
Speaker 2: And by the way, I don't know. They could be
Speaker 2: donating millions of dollars to help the seat turtles, and
Speaker 2: I have no idea. I doubt it.
Speaker 3: You tend to know those things.
Speaker 2: I don't know. People who have a lot of money
Speaker 2: tend to be very quiet about how they donate these
Speaker 2: things because then everyone wants their money.
Speaker 3: I am here in Martha's vinyard. I am seeing that everywhere.
Speaker 2: So I guess at the end of the day, the
Speaker 2: lesson is, if you want to hate someone, do it
Speaker 2: privately from a burner Instagram account and just wash them
Speaker 2: at night, gnawing on your knuckles like I do. But
Speaker 2: at the end of the day, you just don't know
Speaker 2: if someone's evil or you just you don't know what
Speaker 2: they're doing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but I think it goes back to that whole
Speaker 1: theme of you figuring out how to say things, and
Speaker 1: in order to do what you do and still have
Speaker 1: a career, you have to figure out how the delivery
Speaker 1: is going to be.
Speaker 2: I also think, you know, there's the way that you
Speaker 2: say it, and then our audiences are very afraid now,
Speaker 2: so there's certain buzzwords that you say, like I said Israel.
Speaker 2: I don't remember what I was talking about. I said Israel,
Speaker 2: and the crowd went silent, and I called them out.
Speaker 2: I was like, oh, so we can't even say the
Speaker 2: word Israel because you've been taught to answer if you
Speaker 2: say black, Oh my god.
Speaker 3: I'm like so we can't say the color black.
Speaker 2: There is a beauty in calling it out and people realize,
Speaker 2: oh my god, my sphincter was clenched, and then we
Speaker 2: can all come together.
Speaker 3: So there are levels to it.
Speaker 1: You know, it's not about it you're walking into a landmine.
Speaker 1: Sometimes you don't know. For example, I'm I'm. I talked
Speaker 1: very publicly about the Kardashians. I wanted you for a
Speaker 1: long time. I will even use the word I was
Speaker 1: afraid to do it. I was cautious about doing it.
Speaker 1: And the pinata opened up and the candy came out,
Speaker 1: and I was shocked. You'll be shocked with no backlash.
Speaker 1: Think about the reach, Think about the followers, and a
Speaker 1: lot of them are brought. I was shocked that not
Speaker 1: a single no one came in one out of ten
Speaker 1: thousand comments would be like, oh, women not supporting women,
Speaker 1: but nobody was having a problem with it. And if
Speaker 1: I said anything about when I've said anything about anybody else,
Speaker 1: people come. I thought that was interesting, right.
Speaker 2: What I always bothers me about the women not supporting
Speaker 2: women comment is it reduces us down to a simple
Speaker 2: gender and it takes away our complexity.
Speaker 3: And so yeah, a lot of times it is you
Speaker 3: know you should.
Speaker 2: I don't believe in blindly supporting someone based on their chromosomes.
Speaker 2: But I also don't believe. Yeah, I agree with you,
Speaker 2: but I also I don't believe on hurting them because
Speaker 2: of it. I'm a competitive person. I want to I
Speaker 2: want to do better than that man and that woman.
Speaker 2: I've never seen that as gender. So when someone's like
Speaker 2: you didn't support a woman, I'm like, was she funny?
Speaker 3: Why would I support a person?
Speaker 1: But what if you don't support that? And I support
Speaker 1: that woman of course, But yeah, I do not support
Speaker 1: all women.
Speaker 3: You support all people.
Speaker 1: Someone else dogs you're not.
Speaker 2: Some are too wiry, But I think you know.
Speaker 3: I was actually thinking about this the other day.
Speaker 2: My friend Rebecca Sir is like a New York Times
Speaker 2: best selling author. She writes sort of like young young adult,
Speaker 2: like romantic not even not a younger, there's like romantic fiction.
Speaker 2: It's really fun and she does really well. And I
Speaker 2: always see her books because I'm always in an airport.
Speaker 2: I wouls se her books and I actually get very
Speaker 2: proud and excited, Like there is nothing like when you're
Speaker 2: a woman and you have a friend that you genuinely
Speaker 2: only want to see succeed and you actually are their
Speaker 2: cheerleader versus And I talk about this in my new hour,
Speaker 2: this glitterized pro girl No so girl girl bough.
Speaker 1: I was like, I'm not a girl bough. What does
Speaker 1: that even mean? I don't like this, Like.
Speaker 2: It's all it's all this like weak hand job, like
Speaker 2: look empowering women. No, you know what empowers women, equal pay, education,
Speaker 2: pay gap closing, and so there is something too. You know,
Speaker 2: we are called upon to like blindly just like love
Speaker 2: all of our mama's sister bears. And it's like we
Speaker 2: all have those women in our lives that we love
Speaker 2: and just cannot wait to see and it's so fun
Speaker 2: to watch that. And that's what real strength feels like.
Speaker 2: And you don't have a ton of that, and that
Speaker 2: has nothing to do with who you are. It's just
Speaker 2: not everybody is quality and not everybody is worth championing,
Speaker 2: and you can't spend time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm fine saying I do not. I support the
Speaker 1: women and men that I support, and that's my own
Speaker 1: body idea.
Speaker 2: Of male comics.
Speaker 3: Ask me for help, and I'm like, I can't do it.
Speaker 2: I don't believe in your comedy.
Speaker 1: No, I agree, and you and I very much would
Speaker 1: go on for days about this, but we both are
Speaker 1: the same. Whatever someone says, what's it been like being
Speaker 1: in business as a woman, And I'm not saying I
Speaker 1: and I know I'm white and I know I'm privileged.
Speaker 1: I'm saying that I've had to deconstruct it thinking about
Speaker 1: how men have man explained me. But I never knew
Speaker 1: that word, and I never even knew what it meant.
Speaker 1: I had to recently, since I'm asked the question a
Speaker 1: thousand times. I thought to myself, what And then when
Speaker 1: a guy talks to me like I'm a junior player,
Speaker 1: even though we're in the same position, it's something we've
Speaker 1: been trained to just accept and don't realize that like
Speaker 1: that's been happened forever, even if it's not so overt.
Speaker 1: But when asked that question, I was like, I never
Speaker 1: thought about being a woman or a man. I just
Speaker 1: cloud through and I'm a strong woman, like I'm a
Speaker 1: strong person. I'm a strong business person. I agree, I
Speaker 1: can take on any man in any arena. I don't
Speaker 1: care if I'm a woman or a man. That's just me.
Speaker 1: It doesn't mean that there are.
Speaker 3: No I don't think it's just I think this is something.
Speaker 2: I mean, I feel the exact same way, which is
Speaker 2: why I've been trying to be friends with you for
Speaker 2: a very long time. Fine, And I was talking to
Speaker 2: my mom about it. You know, there is this premium
Speaker 2: we placed now on the female struggle. Like my mom
Speaker 2: was a single mom and she and I'll tell you what,
Speaker 2: my mom was a single mom for a period and
Speaker 2: I never and I'm a very strong minded individual, we
Speaker 2: never the word feminism has never come up, had never
Speaker 2: come up my entire It just wasn't talked about in
Speaker 2: the nineties. But moreover, I never heard my mother say
Speaker 2: anything like any of this, like raw raw feminism, go girl,
Speaker 2: any of that stuff. She just did because when you're
Speaker 2: actually working and surviving and doing things, you don't have
Speaker 2: time to talk about.
Speaker 1: Mom's not a bumper sticker, You're just exactly it's yeah, exactly.
Speaker 2: So she's just like she's a New Yorker. She's very blunt,
Speaker 2: you know, she's very like, not in like a rude way,
Speaker 2: just she's just touch. She just gets it. And that's
Speaker 2: how I am. And it's only when I got into comedy,
Speaker 2: and it's only in La and it isn't show business
Speaker 2: that you have to answer for the way that you
Speaker 2: always were. How did you get into comedy? Were you
Speaker 2: a funny woman woman in comedy? I'm like, I just
Speaker 2: did it because no one said I couldn't and no
Speaker 2: one said I could, and I didn't think about it,
Speaker 2: and I just went. And now I have to contextualize
Speaker 2: it like I'm some fierce diva.
Speaker 1: That's exactly, that's exactly, and that's a genius. Because I
Speaker 1: entered into cocktails. I didn't fucking know anything. I walked
Speaker 1: into a store and saw a thousand I was like,
Speaker 1: why am I doing this now? I didn't know there
Speaker 1: was no localorie. I didn't know there was no nothing
Speaker 1: for I didn't know liquor was run by men. I
Speaker 1: never know.
Speaker 2: You didn't know what you didn't know, which is a gift, right,
Speaker 2: Like I never mattered enough to anyone for anyone to
Speaker 2: tell me I sucked, and I never mattered enough for
Speaker 2: anyone to say, go do it. My mom was super cool,
Speaker 2: but like, and I think when that is just something
Speaker 2: you're born with, Like you're like, I'm just gonna go,
Speaker 2: I'm just gonna work, it's gonna do it.
Speaker 1: Yes, but also it's funny that you just said you
Speaker 1: didn't matter, right, did you have a mentor? What's a mentor?
Speaker 1: I didn't know what a mentor was. I would know
Speaker 1: to look for a mentor, and no one woul want
Speaker 1: to mentor me. It was like, that's lingo that we
Speaker 1: make up to frame what's happened. That's exactly what you
Speaker 1: just said. That's exactly it. Analle's just to come up
Speaker 1: with the best idea, best thing to say about female
Speaker 1: work life balance. I don't fucking know. I do everything
Speaker 1: I do wear very well. That's all I know in
Speaker 1: the moment.
Speaker 2: That not only that, I mean, that's a skill in
Speaker 2: of itself, like stand up is it's a solo sport
Speaker 2: if you're a writer, like if you're on a.
Speaker 3: TV show, going to be with people, if you're an actor.
Speaker 2: But like, it is you in the Delta lounge, if
Speaker 2: you're lucky, it is you on a regional flight, it
Speaker 2: is you in a hotel, and you you know, and
Speaker 2: you have a community, you've got the friends. But when
Speaker 2: I started there, I didn't know anyone. No, and I'm
Speaker 2: not saying this out of bitterness. There was no woman
Speaker 2: who like reached out to me to be like, I
Speaker 2: want to help you. It is a competitive we say, no,
Speaker 2: what I mean, it happens, But you're on your own
Speaker 2: on a regional flight in Regina, Saskatchewan.
Speaker 3: How is someone going to reach you? Like you're no,
Speaker 3: you're doing it.
Speaker 1: No, and you're alone. And when you bomb alone, you bomb,
Speaker 1: you bomb.
Speaker 2: Alone, you die, you die alone. Yeah.
Speaker 1: No, but it's true when I when you sign, I say,
Speaker 1: when you sign the paper, it's your name. There's all
Speaker 1: these other people around here and they have all these
Speaker 1: decisions they want to make. But I'm always like, it's
Speaker 1: my fucking ass. I'm alone, and you're alone on a
Speaker 1: plane and on the stage.
Speaker 2: It's funny you say that. Like I was talking with
Speaker 2: my team, you know, we were talking about a show
Speaker 2: and there was an issue with ticketing and it was
Speaker 2: not my fault, but people don't see that. They see
Speaker 2: it as your fault. Like Wise, in the stuff working,
Speaker 2: I'm like, we pay a heavy fee. You do too
Speaker 2: for this link And I was explaining to them there
Speaker 2: was a show I wanted to cancel. I was like,
Speaker 2: we've moved this now twice. I look bad, not my team,
Speaker 2: not anyone, I as the artist. People get angry at me.
Speaker 2: I can't have that. Yeah, people don't think about this
Speaker 2: is your blood, sweat, Deer's a reputation. And you know,
Speaker 2: if if people don't expect a quality product, then what
Speaker 2: do you have you have?
Speaker 1: No, it's so exactly it's your out, I'm saying, And
Speaker 1: I give him a lot of shit. But Kylie Jenner
Speaker 1: had this like bathing suit where someone's whole entire vagina
Speaker 1: was sticking up. I highly doubt she was in China
Speaker 1: sewing the bathing suit, but you know, it's her name
Speaker 1: and it's her vagina on the line, But it's not
Speaker 1: technically her that sowed the bathing suits for sure.
Speaker 2: But wouldn't it be delicious to watch someone like that crumble?
Speaker 2: I mean, that's the whole ethos of our society exactly.
Speaker 3: You know, people would love to see you knock down.
Speaker 2: People would love I mean, I look, I have not
Speaker 2: watched Real Housewives in over a decade, but when I
Speaker 2: did watch it, even before you were at the height
Speaker 2: you're at now, I remember thinking, I remember thinking this
Speaker 2: woman doesn't belong here. I remember watching it and thinking
Speaker 2: she's a legitimate business mind like you happen to be
Speaker 2: on the show, which is I get the pr but
Speaker 2: I was just like, this is a real person with
Speaker 2: a real brain. Your husband's money making a lotion company,
Speaker 2: not a fake fashion show. And I always and then
Speaker 2: you'd say, stuff, I don't this is form ever go
Speaker 2: and I feel way to bring up. But there was something.
Speaker 2: You were on a trip, one of those like forced
Speaker 2: work trips that make you go on with these other women,
Speaker 2: and everyone wears espea drills and someone was tired, and
Speaker 2: you just went like, then go to sleep.
Speaker 1: Oh the Kelly go to sleep. That's an iconic scene.
Speaker 2: As a New York hearted person, It's like that thing
Speaker 2: where you're like, you don't like something, then fucking facts.
Speaker 2: It like making up identity. And I was reminded of
Speaker 2: go to sleep. When I had my baby. We weren't
Speaker 2: giving her I don't know. She's in the other room,
Speaker 2: she's with the nanny and she's crying, and my mom
Speaker 2: comes out of the guests room. She goes give her
Speaker 2: a passive buyer. I'm like, do we I don't know.
Speaker 1: That's really funny, My god, well you're very interesting and
Speaker 1: really nice to talk.
Speaker 2: To you like that's funny, And then you said interesting.
Speaker 1: No, because we know. Oh you're funny, and that's all
Speaker 1: I was saying to like Angelina Jolie, you're pretty like
Speaker 1: we know like you know what I mean, we are.
Speaker 1: I mean, you're not just a funny face.
Speaker 2: Thank you another funny face?
Speaker 1: No you are? You haven't you know? You have a
Speaker 1: strong perspective and I did not know we'd agree on
Speaker 1: so many things and things you said, I I know
Speaker 1: you're right. Well, I say, it's a fucking scam every day,
Speaker 1: all day, and I'm gonna send you scams because it's
Speaker 1: a scam. But hopefully you don't think this podcast is
Speaker 1: a scam because it's literally a garage band that for
Speaker 1: the first year I was I didn't make a dollar.
Speaker 1: I didn't even know understand the medium. But uh, I
Speaker 1: love doing this. So you were really fun.
Speaker 2: Thank you for having me, and I will send you
Speaker 2: a copy of All Things aside.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I was gonna there's only one question that I
Speaker 1: ask everyone. What's your rose and your thorn of your career?
Speaker 2: Oh my god, own, there's more roses than thorns, and
Speaker 2: even the thorns like like travel, you learn to appreciate
Speaker 2: because it's good to get your blood circulating when it
Speaker 2: prits you. I think rose is of the many roses.
Speaker 2: I will say this one being able from your brain
Speaker 2: to come up with something that turns into a currency.
Speaker 2: Like we have a house. I've had houses because of
Speaker 2: a joke about a goblin that I thought of, you know,
Speaker 2: like it's not I didn't make something physically, like it
Speaker 2: was just a funny thought.
Speaker 3: I had a funny turd that.
Speaker 2: I polished, and taking that and being able to travel
Speaker 2: the world like I'm about to go on my second
Speaker 2: Asia tour. So walking into a room in like Kuala
Speaker 2: Lumpur and all these Asians and hid Jabs are looking
Speaker 2: at you and they are laughing at your jokes and
Speaker 2: we are not from the same world. It is the
Speaker 2: most gratifying thing. And so within that, having a context
Speaker 2: for my country, because we are so divided and it
Speaker 2: is so easy where you live to write off the
Speaker 2: rest of the country is fully insane. To get to
Speaker 2: see the country, have an understanding of what people go through,
Speaker 2: and to realize there are good people everywhere and not
Speaker 2: everybody looks the same, and we all it's not as
Speaker 2: simple as the news would make it.
Speaker 3: So I still do love America, even.
Speaker 2: Though we are a little battered and beaten, and so
Speaker 2: getting that working context for my country and an actual
Speaker 2: knowledge versus just the bubble that I live, right, I
Speaker 2: love that. And the thorn is having to the fact
Speaker 2: that somebody had a liquid bomb twenty years ago and
Speaker 2: we still have to we still can't take liquids on planes.
Speaker 3: The thorn is other people.
Speaker 1: That's hilarious. Yeah, and my roses that you have a
Speaker 1: sea horse. You'll always have a sea horse behind you
Speaker 1: on this podcast.
Speaker 2: At this rental property into.
Speaker 1: Awesome, awesome. All right, well, thank you Elizo. We got
Speaker 1: your book, We got it all in, but I appreciate it.
Speaker 2: Thanks Bethany, this was great. Appreciate it.
Speaker 1: Amazing. Have a good day.