1 00:00:01,200 --> 00:00:03,120 Speaker 1: Right now, it is time for the Strawberry Letter. If 2 00:00:03,160 --> 00:00:06,720 Speaker 1: you need advice on relationships, on dating, work, sex, parenting, 3 00:00:06,800 --> 00:00:10,680 Speaker 1: and more, submit year letter to Steve HARVEYFM dot com 4 00:00:10,680 --> 00:00:16,120 Speaker 1: and click submit Strawberry Letter. We're ready, nephew, buckle up 5 00:00:16,120 --> 00:00:17,880 Speaker 1: and hold on tight. We got it tell you hib 6 00:00:17,920 --> 00:00:21,680 Speaker 1: it is the Strawberry Letter. Subject. I'm in love but 7 00:00:21,920 --> 00:00:25,560 Speaker 1: not with my husband. Dear Stephen Shirley. I am a 8 00:00:25,680 --> 00:00:28,360 Speaker 1: thirty year old mother of two and I've been married 9 00:00:28,440 --> 00:00:32,000 Speaker 1: since I was eighteen. Well recently, I met a man 10 00:00:32,080 --> 00:00:36,240 Speaker 1: online and initiated a conversation with him about sports since 11 00:00:36,240 --> 00:00:40,199 Speaker 1: we liked the same teams. I was completely attracted to 12 00:00:40,280 --> 00:00:43,280 Speaker 1: him when I saw him online, and we decided we 13 00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:46,839 Speaker 1: should meet in person. And once we met, we started 14 00:00:46,840 --> 00:00:49,279 Speaker 1: out as friends and we talked to each other and 15 00:00:49,320 --> 00:00:52,680 Speaker 1: saw each other daily. I started to have strong feelings 16 00:00:52,680 --> 00:00:55,880 Speaker 1: for him and it grew into us hugging and kissing 17 00:00:55,960 --> 00:00:59,880 Speaker 1: whenever we were together. Here's the catch. He is all 18 00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:03,240 Speaker 1: so married to his high school sweetheart and they have 19 00:01:03,360 --> 00:01:06,199 Speaker 1: four kids. He says he is in love with his wife, 20 00:01:06,440 --> 00:01:09,200 Speaker 1: yet he still finds time to talk to me and 21 00:01:09,280 --> 00:01:12,360 Speaker 1: see me whenever he posts pictures on social media of 22 00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:15,880 Speaker 1: him and his wife. I get jealous. I see how 23 00:01:15,880 --> 00:01:19,120 Speaker 1: happy they appear to be. I have tried to leave 24 00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:22,280 Speaker 1: him alone, but it never lasts for long because I 25 00:01:22,360 --> 00:01:26,240 Speaker 1: like him so much. In case you're wondering, I cannot 26 00:01:26,440 --> 00:01:30,520 Speaker 1: stand my husband, but I've been with him my whole life, 27 00:01:30,560 --> 00:01:34,000 Speaker 1: and our marriage is comfortable. Besides, I have my kids 28 00:01:34,040 --> 00:01:37,920 Speaker 1: to consider. I know what I'm doing is wrong, but 29 00:01:38,080 --> 00:01:41,000 Speaker 1: now I am head over heels in love with this man, 30 00:01:41,360 --> 00:01:43,360 Speaker 1: and he knows and want to let me go, but 31 00:01:43,560 --> 00:01:47,520 Speaker 1: he's not leaving his wife. What should we do? Well, 32 00:01:47,600 --> 00:01:50,040 Speaker 1: I don't know what we should do, but I definitely 33 00:01:50,040 --> 00:01:54,080 Speaker 1: know what you should do. Okay, Listen, this is a 34 00:01:54,400 --> 00:01:58,040 Speaker 1: go nowhere, hopeless, hot mess of a situation, and you 35 00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:02,720 Speaker 1: know that needs to end right now today, but it 36 00:02:02,880 --> 00:02:05,760 Speaker 1: probably won't because you are head over heels in love 37 00:02:05,800 --> 00:02:08,520 Speaker 1: with this man, as you say, and he has already 38 00:02:08,560 --> 00:02:11,720 Speaker 1: told you he's not leaving his wife. So you know 39 00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:14,400 Speaker 1: you're in somewhat of a quandary here because you say 40 00:02:14,440 --> 00:02:18,000 Speaker 1: you love him. I say that if you're unhappy in 41 00:02:18,040 --> 00:02:22,160 Speaker 1: your marriage, get some therapy, get some marriage counseling, talk 42 00:02:22,240 --> 00:02:24,919 Speaker 1: to your husband. Maybe you guys could try different things, 43 00:02:25,000 --> 00:02:29,239 Speaker 1: get a separation, do something else, But don't just sit 44 00:02:29,280 --> 00:02:33,200 Speaker 1: there and wallow an unhappiness while seeing someone else on 45 00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:35,720 Speaker 1: the side, you know, behind your husband's back and him 46 00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:39,520 Speaker 1: behind his wife's back. That doesn't help anything. I know 47 00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:44,440 Speaker 1: you want to what, nephew, are you squirming in your 48 00:02:44,440 --> 00:02:51,600 Speaker 1: seat though? All over it? Jeez? Anyway? Yeah, he's not leaving, 49 00:02:51,639 --> 00:02:54,040 Speaker 1: so what are you? Guys? You just destined to sneak 50 00:02:54,080 --> 00:02:55,960 Speaker 1: around and see each other that way? Is that what 51 00:02:56,080 --> 00:02:58,880 Speaker 1: you really want? You say you want to stay married 52 00:02:58,880 --> 00:03:01,720 Speaker 1: to your husband for your kids. I mean that's good, 53 00:03:01,760 --> 00:03:04,240 Speaker 1: and that's noble and everything, but you gotta have some 54 00:03:04,320 --> 00:03:07,120 Speaker 1: happiness in this situation too. And if you're not happy, 55 00:03:07,120 --> 00:03:09,520 Speaker 1: if your marriage is not making you happy, you gotta 56 00:03:09,560 --> 00:03:11,880 Speaker 1: do something about that. First of all, I say, good, 57 00:03:11,960 --> 00:03:18,440 Speaker 1: some counseling, all right, there you go, Steve, Yeah, yeah, 58 00:03:18,440 --> 00:03:24,040 Speaker 1: that's nice, and get yourself some counseling. Oh that ain't 59 00:03:24,040 --> 00:03:26,239 Speaker 1: worth it. Dawn can tell you that right now. We're 60 00:03:26,360 --> 00:03:28,600 Speaker 1: gonna skip over that. This letter. Don't say it's nothing 61 00:03:28,600 --> 00:03:33,080 Speaker 1: about no damn counselor this thirty year old mother. Here's 62 00:03:33,080 --> 00:03:35,840 Speaker 1: the subject. I'm in love but not with my husband 63 00:03:35,880 --> 00:03:37,760 Speaker 1: now that's the only time might hear you say the 64 00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:40,880 Speaker 1: word love in this letter. I guy must point this out. 65 00:03:41,640 --> 00:03:44,680 Speaker 1: Thirty year old mother too be marriage since you're eighteen, 66 00:03:45,120 --> 00:03:48,119 Speaker 1: probably dated the boy sence before that, you've never had 67 00:03:48,120 --> 00:03:51,440 Speaker 1: any other relationship. You know, met this man online, y'all 68 00:03:51,440 --> 00:03:54,280 Speaker 1: started talking about the sports. Then you saw him. He 69 00:03:54,320 --> 00:03:57,320 Speaker 1: was attracted to him. Y'all decided to meet him person. 70 00:03:57,400 --> 00:04:00,680 Speaker 1: Once you met him, y'all started out of friends, and 71 00:04:00,760 --> 00:04:03,920 Speaker 1: you talk to each other and saw each other daily. 72 00:04:05,080 --> 00:04:07,760 Speaker 1: Now you got to go out your way to meet 73 00:04:07,840 --> 00:04:13,360 Speaker 1: somebody daily. This ain't a co worker. Hello, This just 74 00:04:13,560 --> 00:04:17,000 Speaker 1: a dude offline. So y'all got to hook up. That 75 00:04:17,160 --> 00:04:21,400 Speaker 1: takes time. So you're y'all making ways to go see 76 00:04:21,440 --> 00:04:25,200 Speaker 1: each other. Now both of y'all is married. We'll get 77 00:04:25,200 --> 00:04:28,480 Speaker 1: into that in a minute. I started having strong feeling 78 00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:31,479 Speaker 1: for him, and it grew into us hugging and kissing 79 00:04:31,920 --> 00:04:36,440 Speaker 1: whenever we were together. Hell, y'all see y'all out of 80 00:04:36,480 --> 00:04:40,440 Speaker 1: sports talk. See that older that ald We like the 81 00:04:40,520 --> 00:04:44,640 Speaker 1: same team? Hello? How much liking the same team gonna 82 00:04:44,680 --> 00:04:47,680 Speaker 1: get you? Every day? Y'all just up talking about this 83 00:04:47,800 --> 00:04:51,280 Speaker 1: same damn team, About how much y'all like it. Nah, 84 00:04:51,600 --> 00:04:54,039 Speaker 1: he looking at yall lips. You're looking at his lips, 85 00:04:54,240 --> 00:04:57,560 Speaker 1: y'all putting your tongue in each other mouth. Wow, your 86 00:04:57,680 --> 00:05:02,880 Speaker 1: damn right. Every day, se Now I'm talking about the team. 87 00:05:03,040 --> 00:05:07,200 Speaker 1: Nobody talk about her team every damn day. The Browns 88 00:05:07,320 --> 00:05:09,480 Speaker 1: is much healthy. Need damn talking about the damn team 89 00:05:09,520 --> 00:05:13,359 Speaker 1: every day. Here's the catch. He is also married to 90 00:05:13,520 --> 00:05:17,479 Speaker 1: his high school sweetheart and they have four kids. He 91 00:05:17,640 --> 00:05:20,760 Speaker 1: says he's in love with his wife, yet he still 92 00:05:20,839 --> 00:05:23,680 Speaker 1: find time to talk to me and see me. Okay, 93 00:05:23,760 --> 00:05:26,960 Speaker 1: listen to me. Now read your lying back to yourself. 94 00:05:27,320 --> 00:05:30,120 Speaker 1: He says he's in love with his wife, yet he 95 00:05:30,160 --> 00:05:33,200 Speaker 1: finds times to talk to me and see me. He 96 00:05:33,240 --> 00:05:37,719 Speaker 1: ain't in love with you. He ain't in love with you. 97 00:05:38,680 --> 00:05:41,520 Speaker 1: I'll explain that to you in a minute. Whenever he 98 00:05:41,600 --> 00:05:43,680 Speaker 1: posts pictures on social media for him and his wife, 99 00:05:43,680 --> 00:05:46,960 Speaker 1: I get jealous. That's his wife to your jealous fault. 100 00:05:47,440 --> 00:05:49,280 Speaker 1: Put some pictures of you and your kids and your 101 00:05:50,120 --> 00:05:55,920 Speaker 1: husband on that. Just smile at it. I see how 102 00:05:55,920 --> 00:05:58,960 Speaker 1: happy they appeared to be. I've tried to leave him alone, 103 00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:01,680 Speaker 1: but it never lasts for because I like him so much. 104 00:06:01,920 --> 00:06:03,920 Speaker 1: The first of all, if you think that I'm gonna 105 00:06:03,920 --> 00:06:05,839 Speaker 1: sit up here and believe all y'all doing is hugging 106 00:06:05,839 --> 00:06:08,920 Speaker 1: and kissing. You're wrong about that. You're leaving stuff out 107 00:06:08,920 --> 00:06:18,520 Speaker 1: this leaf every day, just hugging and kissing every day. 108 00:06:19,080 --> 00:06:22,320 Speaker 1: And the subject I'm in love but not with my husband, Well, 109 00:06:22,320 --> 00:06:23,800 Speaker 1: what are you doing to make you be in love? 110 00:06:24,560 --> 00:06:29,599 Speaker 1: Because the show ain't talking about sports? Lebron, Lebron. Most 111 00:06:29,600 --> 00:06:33,760 Speaker 1: people been in love with me. I'm just trying to 112 00:06:33,800 --> 00:06:39,680 Speaker 1: say it's because of what I do home. It ain't 113 00:06:39,680 --> 00:06:45,680 Speaker 1: the Brown, it ain't the cal Yeah, it ain't Houston. 114 00:06:47,760 --> 00:06:51,640 Speaker 1: All right, listen, h Yeah, we'll be back at twenty 115 00:06:51,680 --> 00:06:58,039 Speaker 1: three after you're listening. All right, guys. Uh, here we 116 00:06:58,120 --> 00:07:03,159 Speaker 1: go with Steve Part two spots and it's thirty old mother. 117 00:07:03,279 --> 00:07:06,040 Speaker 1: And that's why I meant this dude don't live, So 118 00:07:06,360 --> 00:07:09,000 Speaker 1: I didn't start feeling something for the dude. They meeting 119 00:07:09,080 --> 00:07:14,160 Speaker 1: every day now, hugging and kissing every day, hugging and kissing. 120 00:07:15,040 --> 00:07:18,520 Speaker 1: He married, got folk kids, she married, got two kids. 121 00:07:19,320 --> 00:07:21,600 Speaker 1: He says he in love with his wife, yet he 122 00:07:21,720 --> 00:07:24,040 Speaker 1: still feels time to find time talk to me and 123 00:07:24,040 --> 00:07:26,920 Speaker 1: see me. But I've been understand something about men. Men 124 00:07:27,040 --> 00:07:29,200 Speaker 1: can be in love with somebody else and find time 125 00:07:29,200 --> 00:07:31,880 Speaker 1: to see and talk to you. Yeah, but no this now, 126 00:07:31,960 --> 00:07:35,240 Speaker 1: he ain't in love with you. He's not gonna leave 127 00:07:35,360 --> 00:07:38,880 Speaker 1: his wife. I've tried to leave him alone, but it 128 00:07:38,960 --> 00:07:41,840 Speaker 1: never lasts long because I liked him so much. What 129 00:07:42,760 --> 00:07:44,800 Speaker 1: that a minute ago? You was in love, but I 130 00:07:44,840 --> 00:07:48,960 Speaker 1: liked him so much because of what he do. It 131 00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:53,440 Speaker 1: ain't just a hugging. In case you wonder I cannot 132 00:07:53,520 --> 00:07:56,600 Speaker 1: stand my husband. I know you can't stand your husband 133 00:07:56,600 --> 00:07:59,560 Speaker 1: because you're over here talking sports with this man and 134 00:07:59,720 --> 00:08:03,560 Speaker 1: talk sexiness with the sports. Did you see him dunk 135 00:08:03,640 --> 00:08:10,760 Speaker 1: that ball? Did you see that ball go through them 136 00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:18,800 Speaker 1: upright right down the middle? What did you see him 137 00:08:18,840 --> 00:08:23,640 Speaker 1: tackle him? Fell all over him, rolling over and everything 138 00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:28,040 Speaker 1: I showed, like the way the quarterback put his hands 139 00:08:28,120 --> 00:08:31,960 Speaker 1: up under that to get that ball. Wow, we just 140 00:08:32,000 --> 00:08:35,400 Speaker 1: talking sports now, That's why we were just sports talking 141 00:08:36,440 --> 00:08:41,320 Speaker 1: throw it. Indeed, you better throw that thing to me. 142 00:08:43,440 --> 00:08:50,120 Speaker 1: Go long, just go long. We just talking sports now, 143 00:08:50,800 --> 00:08:55,920 Speaker 1: But go long? Who you need to get a pity flame? 144 00:08:57,240 --> 00:09:02,560 Speaker 1: Illegal use of hands? Hear this? I can't believe we 145 00:09:02,640 --> 00:09:05,640 Speaker 1: fell in love like this. We was just talking sports 146 00:09:06,360 --> 00:09:18,200 Speaker 1: talking been here man holding here my turn. Let me 147 00:09:18,280 --> 00:09:26,920 Speaker 1: kick the ball. You like wide receiver, you got soft hand? 148 00:09:28,160 --> 00:09:38,120 Speaker 1: Who's the tight end? All right, Shirley, you know yeah, 149 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:44,640 Speaker 1: we're sports talk right now, sitting up in here. Oh 150 00:09:45,080 --> 00:09:50,720 Speaker 1: you rough in the past. Better quit doing that to me, 151 00:09:52,080 --> 00:10:00,320 Speaker 1: show better quit doing that to you. Well, so now 152 00:10:00,360 --> 00:10:06,040 Speaker 1: after y'all to talk's voice and hand seat. Now you 153 00:10:06,080 --> 00:10:10,040 Speaker 1: can't stay in your damnhood. Been within your whole life, 154 00:10:10,040 --> 00:10:14,480 Speaker 1: and our marriage is comfortable. Besides, you got kids. Consider 155 00:10:15,040 --> 00:10:16,760 Speaker 1: Now here's the key to the whole thing, and this 156 00:10:16,880 --> 00:10:20,040 Speaker 1: one I'm gonna started helping Tommy out. I know what 157 00:10:20,080 --> 00:10:23,600 Speaker 1: I'm doing is wrong, but now I'm head over heels 158 00:10:23,600 --> 00:10:26,440 Speaker 1: in love with this new man. He doesn't want to 159 00:10:26,520 --> 00:10:29,560 Speaker 1: let me go, but he's not leaving my wife. What 160 00:10:29,720 --> 00:10:32,080 Speaker 1: should we do? We'll let me in flame them. He 161 00:10:32,240 --> 00:10:36,360 Speaker 1: doing what he gonna do. He ain't got no other plans. 162 00:10:36,480 --> 00:10:40,440 Speaker 1: You is the other plan. See, the man is doing 163 00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:44,120 Speaker 1: what he do. Now, since both of you all are married, 164 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:47,559 Speaker 1: and both of you all are in a consensual relationship, 165 00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:51,280 Speaker 1: I'm gonna tell you something that a young man told me. 166 00:10:51,800 --> 00:10:54,400 Speaker 1: I never understood this, but he used to use this 167 00:10:54,520 --> 00:11:00,960 Speaker 1: all the time. The saying is fair exchange. Ain't no 168 00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:04,440 Speaker 1: rob see you man, I'm man. You got kids, I 169 00:11:04,559 --> 00:11:07,200 Speaker 1: get kids. You in love, I'm in love. You ain't 170 00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:10,120 Speaker 1: gonna know where I ain't gonna But we're getting together 171 00:11:10,800 --> 00:11:13,960 Speaker 1: to come a problem and solve a problem that we 172 00:11:14,120 --> 00:11:20,360 Speaker 1: both have. A we go now? Is that right? One 173 00:11:20,440 --> 00:11:24,240 Speaker 1: hundred percent? No? It is? It is one hundred percent 174 00:11:24,840 --> 00:11:32,760 Speaker 1: morally dead wrong. But ain't we all senter, yes, saved? 175 00:11:34,679 --> 00:11:41,280 Speaker 1: Ain't we all come short or the mark? Yes? Ain't 176 00:11:41,280 --> 00:11:51,840 Speaker 1: we come on now? Went from coming millilite a shot 177 00:11:52,040 --> 00:11:59,120 Speaker 1: or the glory of God? Ain't we guilty over life's 178 00:11:59,360 --> 00:12:03,880 Speaker 1: less for pleasures? Yes? We are? Who in here ain't 179 00:12:03,960 --> 00:12:09,760 Speaker 1: been tempted? Who in here I ain't wanted somebody that 180 00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:15,760 Speaker 1: wasn't yours? Who ain't looked over there and wish they 181 00:12:15,840 --> 00:12:20,360 Speaker 1: was over there with him? Who here ain't had something 182 00:12:20,559 --> 00:12:24,040 Speaker 1: across their mind and wanted it to stay there and 183 00:12:24,320 --> 00:12:30,240 Speaker 1: visit for a while. Ain't said something inappropriate to a 184 00:12:30,400 --> 00:12:37,040 Speaker 1: woman somewhere, hoping that it led to something inappropriated. I 185 00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:41,560 Speaker 1: want to know who among you ain't took the time 186 00:12:41,880 --> 00:12:45,680 Speaker 1: to say, looking hill or what you think? How you're 187 00:12:45,679 --> 00:12:50,200 Speaker 1: wanted making mine? Give me some I like it? Like 188 00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:57,280 Speaker 1: that touched me again? Who baby as I oh right there, 189 00:12:58,000 --> 00:13:02,360 Speaker 1: come on naw and you come back over. Who in 190 00:13:02,480 --> 00:13:06,719 Speaker 1: here ain't said this? All right? You're listening to the 191 00:13:06,920 --> 00:13:08,319 Speaker 1: Stave Harvey Morning Show.