WEBVTT - Mario Kart as NASCAR 0:00:02.680 --> 0:00:05.720 Welcome back to another episode of Alchemy. To sign your 0:00:05.720 --> 0:00:09.280 guest cost Cold Stratton in for KP. Let's meet everybody today, 0:00:09.280 --> 0:00:12.280 shollow me in no particular order, that's all. Thing is here, 0:00:12.440 --> 0:00:15.920 that's all. Uh. If you could have dinner with any athlete, 0:00:16.040 --> 0:00:19.120 living or dead, though the dead one may not have dinner, 0:00:20.600 --> 0:00:25.400 what would it be. Oh, that's very tough, they're very tough. 0:00:26.079 --> 0:00:30.640 Maybe maybe Muhammad Ali. Maybe yeah, I'll go with that. 0:00:30.720 --> 0:00:33.720 I'd like to have with him. And since yeah, and 0:00:33.960 --> 0:00:38.839 more food for me, I guess. So that's good. Look 0:00:38.920 --> 0:00:43.840 that that that's good. Next up it's Craig Kakowski. Hey, 0:00:43.880 --> 0:00:48.000 Craigor's what lazy writing conceit in movies drives you crazy? 0:00:48.159 --> 0:00:50.040 Is there a thing that happens that people rely on 0:00:50.040 --> 0:00:53.200 that just makes you bonkers when you see it? That's 0:00:53.200 --> 0:01:01.240 my car. It's not as coming anymore. But I think 0:01:01.280 --> 0:01:04.920 Phil feels like cars always gets got stolen in eighties 0:01:04.920 --> 0:01:07.520 and nineties action movies, and there would always be a 0:01:07.560 --> 0:01:11.600 business and asshole businessman, h white guy in a suit 0:01:12.160 --> 0:01:15.760 who'd come running out after the sports car that he 0:01:15.800 --> 0:01:22.399 had left, you know, running or with the keys. That's 0:01:22.400 --> 0:01:25.039 a good thing. I love that Mine is always like 0:01:25.120 --> 0:01:27.920 the like overhearing something out of context when you're about 0:01:27.959 --> 0:01:30.160 to confess something to somebody, Like you know, you're walking 0:01:30.160 --> 0:01:31.480 to the door to tell somebody you love them, and 0:01:31.480 --> 0:01:34.360 then you hear them say like, I hate them when 0:01:34.400 --> 0:01:36.920 they don't love me the way I want them too, 0:01:37.160 --> 0:01:38.920 and they just really hate them part and turn away, 0:01:38.959 --> 0:01:40.920 and then you have to add a thirty minutes onto 0:01:40.959 --> 0:01:44.679 the movie because that makes me crazy. I hate it 0:01:44.680 --> 0:01:46.800 so much. And that's the equivalent also of turning on 0:01:46.840 --> 0:01:50.440 the news to get the exact store. Yeah, turning it 0:01:50.480 --> 0:01:54.040 off the second that story is over. Still on the 0:01:54.120 --> 0:02:00.120 loose click hey, speaking of it's Mark Gagliardi, still on 0:02:00.160 --> 0:02:04.240 the loot the Mark, Hey, what candy or sweet treat? 0:02:04.320 --> 0:02:06.480 Do you like that? Others might not be so wild about. 0:02:07.360 --> 0:02:12.040 I am a I'm a Whoppers fan, and it turns 0:02:12.040 --> 0:02:17.000 out I thought everybody loved Whoppers. Not everybody loves Whoppers. 0:02:17.800 --> 0:02:20.760 That malted milk that is malted milk balls that come 0:02:20.800 --> 0:02:23.560 in I guess, so you know that it is malted milk. 0:02:24.000 --> 0:02:26.480 It comes in what looks like a milk cart. So 0:02:26.560 --> 0:02:29.799 I also love that it comes in that that milk cart. 0:02:29.800 --> 0:02:32.680 And I remember from my childhood. Yeah, I'm a full 0:02:32.760 --> 0:02:40.760 on I'm a full on whop head. Ye. Last, but 0:02:40.840 --> 0:02:45.720 not least, it's Jackie do Ruthie, Jackie, what tech or 0:02:45.800 --> 0:02:47.639 life innovation do you hope they figure out in the 0:02:47.720 --> 0:02:50.000 next ten years? Like in ten years, what's the cool 0:02:50.000 --> 0:02:51.760 thing that they could develop that you would be totally 0:02:51.760 --> 0:02:56.560 into tech or life innovation? I mean, I get the 0:02:56.600 --> 0:02:59.720 way I answered these is I go with my gut 0:03:00.000 --> 0:03:02.080 and I just say the first thing that came to 0:03:02.160 --> 0:03:05.320 my mind, and then later sometimes I'm like, God, God, 0:03:05.520 --> 0:03:08.520 why did I do that? But this time I like 0:03:08.600 --> 0:03:11.320 what my gut is saying. Though it will bring us 0:03:11.360 --> 0:03:15.160 to a serious place. Um, I hope we fucking find 0:03:15.200 --> 0:03:18.560 a cure for cancer. Whether that that's an innovation that 0:03:18.600 --> 0:03:22.280 needs to happen, um, tech or life. I would call 0:03:22.320 --> 0:03:25.080 it a life innovation. But if tech tech is going 0:03:25.160 --> 0:03:30.520 to get us there for sure? Um if that I 0:03:30.560 --> 0:03:33.760 want that the most. And then an asshole businessman runs 0:03:33.760 --> 0:03:39.360 out and goes, that's my cure. Now, I like, I'm 0:03:39.400 --> 0:03:42.280 with you there, that would be pretty amazing. Well, on 0:03:42.400 --> 0:03:47.920 that fun note, I know I know that all food 0:03:47.960 --> 0:03:54.800 based inns were food based. All of our scenes suggestions 0:03:54.800 --> 0:03:57.200 are gathered from listeners, emails, or from our Patreon va 0:03:57.320 --> 0:03:59.320 p s. To become a Patreon supporter of the show 0:03:59.360 --> 0:04:02.360 and enjoy it exclusive content and other perks, just head 0:04:02.360 --> 0:04:05.640 on over to Patreon dot com slash alchemy this. If 0:04:05.680 --> 0:04:08.200 you'd like to submit a scene suggestion via email, please 0:04:08.200 --> 0:04:11.320 write to the podcast at alchemy this email at gmail 0:04:11.400 --> 0:04:18.520 dot com. That's dot com. Scene one is from Alchemy 0:04:18.600 --> 0:04:22.080 v I P. Corey Booth, who wrote warning scene suggestion 0:04:22.320 --> 0:04:25.280 look away for those who must a Mario Kart race 0:04:25.360 --> 0:04:30.400 being covered like it was NASCAR. Love you guys, man. 0:04:30.680 --> 0:04:34.800 We here live to see the race of the century, 0:04:34.920 --> 0:04:39.200 and I'm always here with my co host Tureen. Taureen 0:04:39.480 --> 0:04:44.200 glad to have you on board. It's loud as hell, Jimmy, 0:04:44.320 --> 0:04:48.920 it's loud as hell. Trinaw you you've been a you're 0:04:48.920 --> 0:04:50.800 a driver for a long time. Can you give us 0:04:51.279 --> 0:04:53.560 some example of what's going on in their heads right 0:04:53.560 --> 0:04:56.000 now before the race starts. Well, I'm someone who would 0:04:56.120 --> 0:04:59.159 choose a motorcycle over a four wheel learned that was 0:04:59.279 --> 0:05:02.120 my choice the race. And as you know these races, 0:05:02.200 --> 0:05:04.240 you can have either one and they're gonna be in 0:05:04.279 --> 0:05:07.919 the same, uh competition. I was a motorcycle girl. So 0:05:07.960 --> 0:05:10.440 I was always about my tight turns, and I was 0:05:10.520 --> 0:05:13.279 honestly thinking a lot about my power ups and how 0:05:13.320 --> 0:05:17.719 I was gonna, you know, more more defense than offense. 0:05:17.760 --> 0:05:22.240 I was a defensive driver, defensive driver. Okay, And I 0:05:22.279 --> 0:05:25.520 have a question for you, actually, Jimmy, you're someone who's 0:05:25.560 --> 0:05:29.240 actually had a lot of personal loss on the uh 0:05:29.360 --> 0:05:32.080 the driveway here on the on the track. Are you 0:05:32.200 --> 0:05:36.360 talking about my betting abbots? Um? Yes, gambling is an issue. 0:05:37.600 --> 0:05:40.560 How's it going right? I think today I have some insight, scoop, 0:05:40.760 --> 0:05:43.640 and I have some money down on toad and I think, wow, 0:05:43.680 --> 0:05:45.960 so you're still you're still going for it? Yeah, I 0:05:45.960 --> 0:05:49.479 think this comes clear. I won't know, Uh, Jeff goons 0:05:49.560 --> 0:05:54.080 any more money? You know. Turns out though didn't do 0:05:54.120 --> 0:05:58.520 what you thought he would do today, did he? Jimmy, 0:05:58.560 --> 0:06:00.520 I'll tell you, I don't know what was happening. I 0:06:00.880 --> 0:06:02.920 just I just let's give me, give me, give me 0:06:03.440 --> 0:06:06.880 just one more go. Whoa, whoa. You don't get to gimme, gimme, gimme. 0:06:07.000 --> 0:06:10.080 You don't get to come into here, into my back room, 0:06:10.520 --> 0:06:14.560 underneath my lamp, in my metal chair, wearing my ropes 0:06:15.400 --> 0:06:21.000 and say gimme, gimme, gimme me. Okay, yeah, no, no, no, 0:06:21.279 --> 0:06:24.679 the gimme, gimme gimme is gonna be me when you gimme, gimme, 0:06:24.800 --> 0:06:28.680 gimme several of your toes for Toad not winning today 0:06:29.080 --> 0:06:31.960 when you swore it was a sure thing. What happened 0:06:32.000 --> 0:06:35.240 out there, Jimmy, what happened with the banana appeals and 0:06:35.400 --> 0:06:39.600 the shells and the little slippery spots that took Toad 0:06:39.760 --> 0:06:43.440 down today? I don't know. I'm just I'm just an announcer. 0:06:43.520 --> 0:06:46.600 I don't know what's happening on the race track. I 0:06:46.720 --> 0:06:50.320 got good information from his mechanic, and I thought you 0:06:50.400 --> 0:06:52.720 were an announcer and you don't know what's happening on 0:06:52.839 --> 0:06:56.520 the race track. Your job is to know what's happening 0:06:56.600 --> 0:07:00.479 on the race track and relay that information to to people. 0:07:00.800 --> 0:07:04.440 So I'm asking you for some information, Jimmy, what the 0:07:04.640 --> 0:07:08.159 hell happened today? You can you can put the knife down. 0:07:08.560 --> 0:07:10.840 You can put the knife Okay, I can put the 0:07:10.920 --> 0:07:14.320 knife down, but I can pick up this shell. I'm sorry, 0:07:14.360 --> 0:07:22.520 I messed up. It was Rainbow Road. Rainbow Road, you 0:07:22.640 --> 0:07:26.640 were supposed to throw that race and I for one time, 0:07:26.720 --> 0:07:29.480 I didn't fall off the sides, and I'm like, I 0:07:29.640 --> 0:07:34.520 got this, and so I wanted look, you know, I 0:07:35.680 --> 0:07:40.560 these cards defy the laws of physics. Uh, and I 0:07:41.080 --> 0:07:45.640 don't know why I got into wagering on on them. Okay, 0:07:46.760 --> 0:07:50.400 it's not good. Look, it's miraculous that I can drive. 0:07:50.720 --> 0:07:53.960 I'm a mushroom with Z but I made it. I 0:07:54.160 --> 0:08:02.680 got through. You know, I had to do it. Okay, Look, mushroom, Uh, 0:08:05.200 --> 0:08:11.960 you're you're out. You're out? What you're out? I got? Uh? 0:08:12.720 --> 0:08:15.040 What I got? I got you know, eight drivers waiting 0:08:15.080 --> 0:08:17.600 to take your spot. I got a I got a 0:08:17.680 --> 0:08:22.160 giant gorilla, I got a I got a flower that sings. 0:08:23.320 --> 0:08:26.120 I gotta I don't know, I don't know. It's a 0:08:26.160 --> 0:08:28.120 lot of a lot of crazy ship. We're here at 0:08:28.160 --> 0:08:31.480 the Cooper Cup, and the biggest story today is that 0:08:31.680 --> 0:08:37.719 Mushroom is not racing. I repeat, mushroom is not racing today. 0:08:39.040 --> 0:08:41.760 A tree, you've you've you've been a driver before. So 0:08:41.960 --> 0:08:44.360 tell us what exactly are they looking for in a 0:08:44.520 --> 0:08:48.760 new driver. Okay, I will tell you that. And then Jimmy, 0:08:48.800 --> 0:08:50.640 we gotta move on from the fact that I used 0:08:50.679 --> 0:08:54.079 to drive because it, honestly, it just harps on my 0:08:54.320 --> 0:08:58.000 age and my limits and it makes me feel dark 0:08:58.240 --> 0:09:02.439 inside a tree. The crowds want to hear about what 0:09:02.559 --> 0:09:05.200 it's like to be an experienced driver, so I'm gonna 0:09:05.240 --> 0:09:07.240 give it to them. So I'm going to give it 0:09:07.320 --> 0:09:09.319 to them. What they're looking for. You're asking for what 0:09:09.400 --> 0:09:12.520 they're looking for in a driver that's correctorin And I'm 0:09:12.559 --> 0:09:15.160 wonder that Penzil oil pencil is the best oil you 0:09:15.240 --> 0:09:17.400 can put in your car. All right back to your dream. 0:09:17.440 --> 0:09:20.160 It really depends because sometimes you want a lighter driver, 0:09:20.400 --> 0:09:23.120 like a like a baby peach, and you want someone 0:09:23.200 --> 0:09:26.360 who's gonna be that's gonna be a fast because they're 0:09:26.480 --> 0:09:29.240 lighter in the seat. However, if you get a heftier 0:09:29.360 --> 0:09:32.000 driver like a Bowser, you're going to be able to 0:09:32.120 --> 0:09:35.640 take turns better. And again, you know me, defensive player, 0:09:35.800 --> 0:09:39.640 you're gonna be able to knock some people around, and 0:09:39.840 --> 0:09:42.679 that's very very important. Now I would ask you who 0:09:42.720 --> 0:09:45.599 you're betting on, but I'm praying for your children that 0:09:45.720 --> 0:09:48.839 you are not bet Luigi Luigi this time. It's really good. 0:09:48.880 --> 0:09:51.640 I got a good inside deal, and uh, I think 0:09:51.679 --> 0:09:54.920 it's gonna come through and speaking of coming through, so 0:09:55.080 --> 0:09:57.520 it didn't work out so well with Luigi on that 0:09:57.720 --> 0:10:01.520 last race. Huh you got yeah? Yeah, yeah yeah. Okay, 0:10:01.640 --> 0:10:04.840 now listen, now you have the knife out already. Let 0:10:04.880 --> 0:10:07.000 me Yeah, I got the knife out already. I got 0:10:07.080 --> 0:10:11.360 all the tools laid out on the table. Oh my god, yeah, 0:10:11.480 --> 0:10:14.240 this is a scalpel. And then this is this is 0:10:14.360 --> 0:10:17.079 Oh my goodness, this is a it's a nutcracker, like 0:10:17.160 --> 0:10:21.719 a Christmas nutcracker. Yeah, it's a Christmas nutcracker. And you 0:10:21.800 --> 0:10:23.800 know what I'm gonna do right now, I'm gonna give 0:10:23.840 --> 0:10:27.439 you a little demonstration of what is possibly going to 0:10:27.559 --> 0:10:31.680 happen to you if I don't get my money. Hey, hey, Reggie, 0:10:32.160 --> 0:10:37.320 bring that mushroom out here? Oh yeah, bringing a mushroom out. 0:10:37.640 --> 0:10:41.719 That's right. This little guy here was supposed to throw it. 0:10:41.840 --> 0:10:44.040 You remember that. You remember that little guy you were 0:10:44.080 --> 0:10:50.280 supposed to throw the race last week? Yeah yeah, and 0:10:50.360 --> 0:10:53.520 he won that race, and then this week's racey did 0:10:53.600 --> 0:10:57.880 not show up. You know why he did not show up? No, no, 0:10:58.120 --> 0:11:01.559 I don't. He was kicked off his team. He was 0:11:01.679 --> 0:11:04.400 kicked off his team for not throwing it and brought 0:11:04.520 --> 0:11:07.280 directly to me. So that I could show you what 0:11:07.520 --> 0:11:11.960 happens now this little mushroom right here. He went against 0:11:12.000 --> 0:11:14.120 the family. So you know what's gonna happen to this 0:11:14.200 --> 0:11:18.679 little mushroom right here. Um, you're gonna tell First, we're 0:11:18.720 --> 0:11:20.920 gonna dry frying with a little bit of salt to 0:11:21.440 --> 0:11:23.880 draw draw the moisture out. I know, Reggie, I know 0:11:24.000 --> 0:11:25.679 you love this. It's gonna draw a little bit of 0:11:25.679 --> 0:11:28.000 moisture out. Then we're gonna get some rosemary. Mix it 0:11:28.080 --> 0:11:31.960 in there, little olive oil. Tossed the whole thing around together, 0:11:32.200 --> 0:11:33.959 and then it'll get a nice flavor to put a 0:11:34.000 --> 0:11:38.160 little bourbon in there. Set that bourbon on fire. Bourbon mushrooms, 0:11:38.480 --> 0:11:41.120 Bourbon rosemary mushrooms as well. I didn't want to tell 0:11:41.120 --> 0:11:44.320 you I have an inside scoop about this next race. 0:11:44.840 --> 0:11:47.200 Where'd you get your inside scoop from a former driver? 0:11:47.800 --> 0:11:51.199 A former driver with plenty of experience, thirty years of 0:11:51.280 --> 0:11:57.240 experience driving, you know, tren Oh, I get mushroom spot. 0:11:58.559 --> 0:12:00.200 Don't look at me. Don't look at me. I'm sure right. 0:12:00.280 --> 0:12:02.040 Don't look at me. Don't look at me. Don't look 0:12:02.080 --> 0:12:04.199 at me. You can talk to me, but don't look 0:12:04.200 --> 0:12:06.000 at me. I'll stop doing whatever I'm doing if you 0:12:06.080 --> 0:12:07.960 look at me. I'm a ghost and I am shy, 0:12:08.160 --> 0:12:14.480 so do not look at me. Okay, okay, look I 0:12:16.679 --> 0:12:19.719 I don't know what the fuss going on here? All right? 0:12:20.280 --> 0:12:23.199 Look I used to uh, I used to work with boxers. 0:12:23.240 --> 0:12:26.200 All right, it was simple. They were human. They hit 0:12:26.280 --> 0:12:29.400 each other with fists. Now I got like, there's like 0:12:29.480 --> 0:12:34.000 a fox with stars for eyes. There's like it's like 0:12:34.280 --> 0:12:37.079 a lemur who break dances. Like there's a lot of 0:12:37.120 --> 0:12:39.559 a lot of ship going on here. Okay, I'm a 0:12:39.679 --> 0:12:42.560 really good driver. I'm very fast, but if anyone looks 0:12:42.559 --> 0:12:44.880 at me, I will slam the brakes and stop where 0:12:44.880 --> 0:12:47.719 I am until everybody looks away, and then I will 0:12:47.800 --> 0:12:50.360 continue to drive. Why don't you let the ghost on 0:12:50.480 --> 0:12:52.480 the team? Man, Why don't you let a break dance 0:12:52.520 --> 0:12:55.360 and Leamur do it. We don't get scared. We aren't 0:12:55.400 --> 0:12:59.240 scared of nothing. Alright, Calm down, Lamur, and the ghost 0:12:59.360 --> 0:13:04.480 gets the first shot at it, all right, trust me, 0:13:04.520 --> 0:13:07.360 I won't let you down unless someone looks at me. 0:13:08.320 --> 0:13:14.160 Otherwise we're good. Jesus Christ, all right, all right, Well, 0:13:14.240 --> 0:13:19.120 let's let's cut to the race, and we're back live here, 0:13:19.160 --> 0:13:20.960 and we just want to let you know subway makes 0:13:21.000 --> 0:13:25.400 sandwiches the right way. Moving on from previous host, now 0:13:25.480 --> 0:13:28.360 we have step let them know that subway makes them 0:13:28.440 --> 0:13:32.800 the fresh way. Subway eat fresh. That's what we're supposed 0:13:32.840 --> 0:13:35.520 to say. Yeah, sir, thank you, thank you. Train your 0:13:35.559 --> 0:13:39.679 experience goes further than the race course. All right, But 0:13:39.840 --> 0:13:42.560 we're back here live and I'm here joined as always 0:13:42.600 --> 0:13:47.679 with Tureen, who has who's here with me? Thank you, 0:13:48.000 --> 0:13:49.839 thank you so much. And I'm here looking at this. 0:13:50.559 --> 0:13:52.760 We've got a bunch of racers getting ready. They are 0:13:52.880 --> 0:13:56.319 reving their engines. Will Luigi seems to already have his 0:13:56.559 --> 0:14:00.720 car on fire. But what the most interesting person here 0:14:00.880 --> 0:14:02.920 is a new racer and he's in the back of 0:14:03.000 --> 0:14:07.319 the line. That's a ghost. That's a inky, pinky or 0:14:07.360 --> 0:14:09.959 stinky I'm not sure, but I'm gonna I'm gonna go 0:14:10.080 --> 0:14:14.959 with its inky, okay. And you know, how did you 0:14:15.080 --> 0:14:19.080 treat new drivers when they come on the racetrack? I 0:14:19.160 --> 0:14:22.960 mean like they were my fucking competition. I mean I 0:14:23.160 --> 0:14:30.240 throw fucking turtle shells at them. I you know, Oh sorry, 0:14:30.680 --> 0:14:33.560 excuse me. I'm getting hated at this point because when 0:14:33.600 --> 0:14:36.200 I draw a boundary, you just seem to blow right 0:14:36.320 --> 0:14:40.360 through it. But anyways, that's how I would treat it. 0:14:40.400 --> 0:14:44.720 How are you treating your current and debilitating addiction? Well 0:14:45.000 --> 0:14:48.240 I have I have not bet on this one, and 0:14:48.680 --> 0:14:51.200 uh so, God bless, I'm gonna call your wife because 0:14:51.280 --> 0:14:54.480 let me tell you, she's been showing up to my apartment. 0:14:54.760 --> 0:14:57.640 And my apartment is small. I don't have guests a lot. 0:14:58.640 --> 0:15:01.560 You know, Janine? Okay, you and Janine been hanging out great? 0:15:02.720 --> 0:15:09.120 I mean, first of all, whoop, Okay, here we go. 0:15:09.720 --> 0:15:11.800 Looks like Mario is actually in the lead, weird and 0:15:11.880 --> 0:15:14.400 his brother Luigi is all right behind him. Maybe right, baby, 0:15:15.760 --> 0:15:20.480 were the first turn? Yeah? Yeah, you Donkey Kong is somewhere. 0:15:20.560 --> 0:15:26.440 I think. Well, well, well, Inky, look who decides to 0:15:26.600 --> 0:15:29.760 come back to pack Land after spending a little time 0:15:29.840 --> 0:15:34.280 in Mario's country. You think you're better than us? That it? 0:15:34.760 --> 0:15:39.200 You think you're better than us? Yeah, look, Clyde, I 0:15:39.280 --> 0:15:42.040 don't think I'm better than you, all right, don't think 0:15:42.040 --> 0:15:44.080 he's better than us. Blinky doesn't think he's better than 0:15:44.160 --> 0:15:46.960 us than just going around and circus for that? No, no, 0:15:47.120 --> 0:15:50.320 then why did you leave? You left? There were only 0:15:50.440 --> 0:15:55.080 three ghosts against that pac Man this week three ghosts. Okay, 0:15:55.080 --> 0:15:58.080 I'm sorry, guys, I just I saw an opportunity to 0:15:58.160 --> 0:16:01.440 spread my wings, like I was tired of trying to 0:16:01.560 --> 0:16:04.280 catch the little guy and then becoming eyes and returning 0:16:04.320 --> 0:16:09.320 to base and starting all over again. Okay, what's eat fruit? 0:16:09.440 --> 0:16:13.720 I mean, it's delicious and it's full of vitamins. So 0:16:13.800 --> 0:16:16.680 many bouncing pretzels I can have. You know, there's only 0:16:16.760 --> 0:16:20.560 so many a bount some pretzels in the world. This 0:16:20.720 --> 0:16:25.080 is why we need you. You know, you're the best 0:16:25.160 --> 0:16:28.960 of us. Look like that. The race did not go well, 0:16:29.520 --> 0:16:31.640 so there were thousands of people looking at me. I 0:16:31.680 --> 0:16:36.480 didn't even get past the start line. It was really sad. 0:16:36.920 --> 0:16:39.880 It wasn't good. In this world, you're usually all eyes. 0:16:40.040 --> 0:16:42.360 That's all you want is eye contact. But in that world, 0:16:43.320 --> 0:16:46.440 you followed by their rules. You shrink away, someone looks 0:16:46.440 --> 0:16:50.120 at you, freeze. You're the best of us in our world. 0:16:51.560 --> 0:16:54.000 So Carl, you want to come back and train boxing? Huh? 0:16:54.520 --> 0:16:58.160 Racecourse didn't go for you? Huh yes, Jesus Christ, it 0:16:58.280 --> 0:17:00.640 was the worst we got. Hey, you're coming at the 0:17:00.680 --> 0:17:05.080 perfect time. We got this. Uh. Former Soviet block boxer 0:17:05.560 --> 0:17:09.280 he's got a shot at Mike Tyson. Great, great, all right, 0:17:09.880 --> 0:17:14.000 you just gotta teach him the right combo. Yeah maybe, Okay, 0:17:14.040 --> 0:17:16.560 Wait is this is this another video game reference? Because 0:17:17.080 --> 0:17:20.000 it's gonna go right over my head? And that's our 0:17:20.080 --> 0:17:29.119 first seen number twos from Alchemy v I P. David Joho, 0:17:29.240 --> 0:17:32.960 who wrote Howdy Alchemniacs. Here's a quick scene suggestion. A 0:17:33.160 --> 0:17:39.840 baby thinks she's funny? Are you gonna get five minutes? 0:17:39.920 --> 0:17:45.720 Then we're giving you the light? Yeah? All right, that 0:17:46.960 --> 0:17:52.840 I mean that's uh, that's a yes. All right, well 0:17:52.920 --> 0:17:55.560 we'll call that a yes. So uh so, yeah, you 0:17:55.600 --> 0:17:57.639 get five minutes, then you get the light. You get 0:17:57.680 --> 0:18:00.480 one drink ticket for after your set. I can't use 0:18:00.560 --> 0:18:04.440 it before. But yeah, have a great show. You're gonna 0:18:04.480 --> 0:18:06.720 be great good. Just hang out here and then just 0:18:06.760 --> 0:18:08.800 hang out here in the green room until it's your slot. 0:18:08.880 --> 0:18:11.880 You'll know you're you're right after Tony. Tony is really nice. 0:18:12.000 --> 0:18:17.520 They'll they'll warm, they'll warm into the all right shows 0:18:17.560 --> 0:18:26.760 in ten everybody ten, you're new here? Huh where where 0:18:26.840 --> 0:18:40.240 else have you played? Flappers? Yeah? Yeah, well you know, 0:18:40.480 --> 0:18:51.120 uh you know bows La Force. Yeah, he's pretty funny. Right, Yeah, 0:18:54.200 --> 0:18:57.280 don't get me started. Do you need me to fill 0:18:57.320 --> 0:19:04.239 your slippy cup with something? Yeah? Long Island, all right? 0:19:05.119 --> 0:19:06.800 I mean, might as well get the max out of 0:19:06.840 --> 0:19:13.280 that drink ticket, right, they're just looking over your set 0:19:13.359 --> 0:19:18.960 list here. I think I'm covering a lot of the 0:19:19.040 --> 0:19:23.639 same topics. I mean, I know we're gonna have different 0:19:23.680 --> 0:19:29.520 takes on them, certainly, but like, uh, I mean I 0:19:29.600 --> 0:19:32.520 don't want I don't want you to burn. Uh you 0:19:32.640 --> 0:19:38.920 know everything that I'm doing, all right? Yeah, I got 0:19:39.119 --> 0:19:43.720 I got pooping my pants, I got that in there. Yeah, 0:19:44.400 --> 0:19:48.280 I got sucking on mom's titties. That's that's in my set. 0:19:48.560 --> 0:19:51.399 It's in my set. And then I got a I 0:19:51.480 --> 0:19:57.200 got a January six bit. Oh you think you're getting 0:19:57.240 --> 0:19:59.840 in here? Look at the side twenty one months in 0:20:00.160 --> 0:20:06.520 under only all right? Hey, what what the hell I to? 0:20:06.680 --> 0:20:09.639 I have to follow a baby last week? Is this? 0:20:10.040 --> 0:20:12.480 Is this the thing? Is this the new thing? Yeah, 0:20:12.520 --> 0:20:14.560 it's the new thing. Look at the clientele out there, 0:20:14.560 --> 0:20:17.760 all right. These little guys are sucking down juice boxes. 0:20:18.000 --> 0:20:21.359 There's a two box minimum. They're doing like forty boxes. 0:20:21.600 --> 0:20:23.080 All right, this is the best we've done in a 0:20:23.160 --> 0:20:28.399 long time. There there's a line of toddler's waiting to 0:20:28.480 --> 0:20:31.760 get in. I I need this, that this is an 0:20:31.800 --> 0:20:35.720 audience that can grow with me. Jerry, all right, look, 0:20:35.800 --> 0:20:37.480 I'll give you one more shot out there. But Gene, 0:20:37.520 --> 0:20:38.880 I know you don't want to play down, but you're 0:20:38.880 --> 0:20:41.320 gonna have to. You're gonna have to pander to this crowd. 0:20:41.960 --> 0:20:45.119 You know, if things aren't going well, do peekaboo clothes 0:20:45.160 --> 0:20:49.800 a peekaboo. Everyone's doing peekaboo these days. I mean, I've 0:20:49.800 --> 0:20:51.480 got my poop in my pants bit. But it's a 0:20:51.520 --> 0:20:54.280 little more. It's you know, it's more of a think 0:20:55.160 --> 0:21:01.320 it's too heavy. It's too heavy, right, Nerd. I think 0:21:01.400 --> 0:21:06.280 we need to talk with Susie. It's just she really 0:21:06.400 --> 0:21:10.800 thinks that she's funny and that this is the path 0:21:11.000 --> 0:21:14.320 for her. I mean, we said we were always going 0:21:14.359 --> 0:21:17.800 to support what she wanted to do, so she thinks 0:21:17.840 --> 0:21:20.480 she's funny. I mean, you've seen her giggle at you know, 0:21:20.600 --> 0:21:25.000 the noises she makes and okay, but like laughing at yourself, 0:21:25.880 --> 0:21:29.040 and honestly, at this age, is she laughing or is 0:21:29.119 --> 0:21:32.960 it more of a twitch reaction? You know, Look, I 0:21:33.600 --> 0:21:35.720 don't know if it's a twitch or a reaction, but 0:21:35.840 --> 0:21:39.520 the audience seemed to enjoy it. I mean, I just, 0:21:39.680 --> 0:21:42.639 I just I just wanted to believe in something that 0:21:43.560 --> 0:21:46.080 is inaccurate. I just don't want her to grow up 0:21:46.160 --> 0:21:50.200 with a false sense of self. And I just don't 0:21:50.280 --> 0:21:53.920 find spitting up on stage to be funny. That's just 0:21:54.040 --> 0:21:57.159 not the comedy that I want to see. Well, I mean, 0:21:57.400 --> 0:21:59.960 now we're just in the point of just judging her comedy. 0:22:00.160 --> 0:22:03.320 I mean, honey, look, we can we consider this table 0:22:03.440 --> 0:22:05.760 and we can sign this TV deal or not. It's 0:22:05.800 --> 0:22:08.760 going to change your life. Should I leave? Should I 0:22:08.840 --> 0:22:10.680 leave this meeting? Should I be here for this? Listen? 0:22:10.720 --> 0:22:14.000 We're here to offer two point two million dollars six 0:22:14.160 --> 0:22:18.600 year deal, right, So yeah, I mean it's not just 0:22:18.720 --> 0:22:21.520 that we think she's funny, honey, and she thinks she's funny. 0:22:22.200 --> 0:22:25.320 That audience thought she was funny, those scouts thought she 0:22:25.480 --> 0:22:27.840 was funny, and this network thinks she's funny. I mean, 0:22:29.119 --> 0:22:32.040 we're not talking streaming, we're talking broadcast, all right, So 0:22:32.160 --> 0:22:35.199 this is I don't go to anybody for this deal, alright. 0:22:35.320 --> 0:22:37.600 I'm just concerned that it's gonna mess up with her 0:22:37.720 --> 0:22:41.040 knap schedule. We just got her on the right sleep schedule, 0:22:41.080 --> 0:22:46.120 and she's just sleeping regression as part of alright, first 0:22:46.119 --> 0:22:48.479 team in, first team in let's go ahead and get 0:22:48.520 --> 0:22:55.160 in there. Susie. Good, should we eat you? Good? Okay, okay, 0:22:55.200 --> 0:22:58.960 great Susie? So alright, like, so, let's rehearsals up. Alright, 0:22:59.000 --> 0:23:02.400 rehearsals up. Um. As you know in this scene, you've 0:23:02.640 --> 0:23:05.800 just you've gotten back from your big business trip and 0:23:05.960 --> 0:23:11.040 you've found your husband has been unpure. So uh, let's 0:23:11.080 --> 0:23:13.000 go ahead and let's give that a rehearsal. The rest 0:23:13.040 --> 0:23:16.440 of you guys, are you good to go? You're good? Yeah, Yeah, 0:23:16.480 --> 0:23:19.119 we got it, We got it dead. Alright, great, alright, 0:23:19.160 --> 0:23:22.119 so let's go ahead and rehearsal up. Rehearsal up, rehearsle up. 0:23:24.480 --> 0:23:29.840 Whoa baby, I didn't inspect you back, so come on, 0:23:30.040 --> 0:23:36.160 don't cry baby, Come on, you're spinning up all over yourself. 0:23:36.240 --> 0:23:45.800 You got a hold of yourself. Alright, great, crew likes it. 0:23:45.880 --> 0:23:47.600 You can see the reaction you got from the crew. 0:23:50.680 --> 0:23:53.080 That's always good. That's always good when the crew last. Yeah, 0:23:53.280 --> 0:23:54.880 so when we get this in front of the audience, 0:23:55.280 --> 0:23:57.880 can we get a diaper change? Yeah? They need diaper change. 0:23:57.920 --> 0:24:00.680 In here. Let's get last looks, last diper looks. And 0:24:00.760 --> 0:24:03.440 how about what for Susie as well? I'm kidding, I'm kidding. 0:24:05.280 --> 0:24:08.560 All right, that was great, Uh, Susie? Uh, I like 0:24:08.720 --> 0:24:12.040 improvisation you did? You did improv a little bit there, 0:24:12.680 --> 0:24:17.719 threw me off. You're pro, you pro, you followed, you're olled. Uh? 0:24:17.880 --> 0:24:19.240 So you know, just make sure you hit the beats 0:24:19.240 --> 0:24:22.040 of the seat. Okay, everything else is spine as long 0:24:22.080 --> 0:24:23.879 as you hit the beats right the tenements? Got it? 0:24:26.200 --> 0:24:28.760 I gotta say, Susie, your ability to cry on cue 0:24:29.160 --> 0:24:32.399 is unbelievable, Like, how do you do it? Is it 0:24:32.480 --> 0:24:37.440 since memory or you just you just can turn it 0:24:37.520 --> 0:24:40.720 on and off like that. That's fantastic. I've been trying 0:24:40.720 --> 0:24:42.600 to get them to write me some more crying scenes, 0:24:42.640 --> 0:24:44.159 you know, maybe make this, you know, a little more 0:24:44.160 --> 0:24:48.880 of a dramedy. Um. Hey did they did they pressure 0:24:48.920 --> 0:24:56.520 you to uh to sign for for seven seasons? They did? Yeah? Yeah, 0:24:56.640 --> 0:24:59.400 my my, my people are trying to work something out, 0:24:59.520 --> 0:25:05.920 but uh, you know, no favorite nations? Right? Why what's 0:25:05.960 --> 0:25:08.000 so funny? You guys? You're you're working some kind of 0:25:08.040 --> 0:25:12.120 deal with all right? You two were just about ready 0:25:12.160 --> 0:25:14.240 to get filming. The warm up comic is getting the 0:25:14.320 --> 0:25:16.399 audience going. I think you used to work with him 0:25:16.440 --> 0:25:26.879