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Speaker 1: Your body is telling you this feels like crap. It's

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Speaker 1: maybe because this isn't good for you. It's maybe because

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Speaker 1: a change is needed when that is possible, right if

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Speaker 1: it is within your capacity to change it. That's the

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Speaker 1: message from your body.

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Speaker 2: What is going on? Everyone? Emily A body here.

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Speaker 3: You are listening to another installment of hurt A moment

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Speaker 3: from Hurdle. Your girl is back from a beautiful, beautiful,

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Speaker 3: beautiful week in Cabo San Lucas. I can't believe I'd

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Speaker 3: never been to Mexico before, and honestly, it was just

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Speaker 3: so so needed, specifically because of the topic that we're

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Speaker 3: getting into today on the show, with which is burnout.

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Speaker 3: I myself was certainly certainly starting to feel a little

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Speaker 3: bit of this, and so I was really grateful to

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Speaker 3: be able to log off for the most part, travel

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Speaker 3: without an international data plan, and spend some time Sam's phone,

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Speaker 3: taking a deep breath and coming back to me. So

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Speaker 3: I wanted to chat about burnout on the show today,

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Speaker 3: and to do so, I am bringing in an expert.

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Speaker 3: Her name is Victoria Albina. She is a certified life coach,

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Speaker 3: among many things, and the perfect person to be chatting

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Speaker 3: about this topic with and we'll address exactly why. In

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Speaker 3: the beginning of today's episode, we talk about what burnout is,

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Speaker 3: we give it a definition of sorts. We also identify

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Speaker 3: how you know it's happening to you, the signs of it,

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Speaker 3: and the tricks and tips that you can walk away

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Speaker 3: with to navigate burnout on your own. What I love

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Speaker 3: about Victoria's a perch is that she has done so

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Speaker 3: much extensive research on this topic, a lot of which

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Speaker 3: she cites in our discussion today, and she's just got

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Speaker 3: this really great way of explaining things that makes you

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Speaker 3: feel like you're not alone in what you're going through,

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Speaker 3: and that, as you know, is a big part of

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Speaker 3: my mission here over on Hurdle. She also talks about

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Speaker 3: her three a's, which are super helpful, and the importance

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Speaker 3: of self talk and how we speak to ourselves and

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Speaker 3: being realistic about what we're saying to ourselves.

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Speaker 2: So so, so much goodness in this episode, and I'm

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Speaker 2: really excited to bring it to the feed.

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Speaker 3: Before I get into it today, I do want to

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Speaker 3: make sure that I call out one more time. Another

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Speaker 3: Journal Conquered Challenge is well underway. We are on day

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Speaker 3: two today, Wednesday, July fourteenth, and it's not too late

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Speaker 3: for you to get in on the action. If you

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Speaker 3: want to join us journaling three times a week together

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Speaker 3: for the next month, we'd love to have use Simply

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Speaker 3: click on over to the show notes and click the

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Speaker 3: link that will take you to the weekly Hurdle newsletter.

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Speaker 3: Become a paid subscriber and you'll get journaling prompts in

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Speaker 3: your inbox at Emily Body at Hurdle Podcast and also

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Speaker 3: Last Call Out book Club This coming Monday, July nineteenth,

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Speaker 3: for reading Green Lights by Matthew McConaughey. We'll be having

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Speaker 3: a discussion at eight pm Eastern, and I would love

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Speaker 3: to have you join in. The link to do that

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Speaker 3: is in the show notes. Okay, okay, I promise. I

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Speaker 3: am done now with that. Let's get to hurdling.

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Speaker 1: Today.

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Speaker 3: I'm sitting down with Victoria Albina. She's a certified life coach,

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Speaker 3: and we are here to talk all about burnout.

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Speaker 1: How you doing, I'm doing so well? How are you?

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Speaker 3: I'm so good. We were just wrapping this is going

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Speaker 3: to be coming out on Wednesday. We're recording it on Tuesday.

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Speaker 3: I'm fresh back from a trip from Mexico and let

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Speaker 3: me tell you if you want to take a deep

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Speaker 3: exhale on burnout, then heading out to to Cabo San

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Speaker 3: Lucas isn't a bad way to deal with it.

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Speaker 1: It's really not.

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Speaker 3: So before we get into it today, talk to me

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Speaker 3: a little bit about how you got into life coaching

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Speaker 3: and why you're the right person for me to be

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Speaker 3: chatting about this topic with today.

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Speaker 1: Ooh, I love I love the way you asked that.

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Speaker 1: So I came into life coaching through a rather a

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Speaker 1: circuitous path. I am a holistic functional medicine nurse practitioner

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Speaker 1: as well, and so I actually came into coaching through medicine.

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Speaker 1: So I was a primary care provider, worked in the

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Speaker 1: trenches for a hot minute, and then left primary care

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Speaker 1: to do more holistic medicine. And over the years of

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Speaker 1: working in medicine, I came to see that what was

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Speaker 1: really ailing my patients underneath the actual parasites and actual

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Speaker 1: thyroid problems, right, and like actual physical issues, was trauma, stress,

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Speaker 1: lack of self assurance, issues with self worth. Right, there

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Speaker 1: were all these mental health concerns that came from their

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Speaker 1: stories about themselves that were showing up in their soma,

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Speaker 1: in their bodies and so madically the tension patterns they

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Speaker 1: were holding were worsening their symptoms. And of course none

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Speaker 1: of this is you know, saying they were to blame

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Speaker 1: for their symptoms. What I'm saying is it was so

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Speaker 1: much more complex than just looking at a bunch of

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Speaker 1: labs and doling out supplements or pharmaceuticals, and through that

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Speaker 1: path of healing myself and seeing because the universe is

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Speaker 1: amazing my own issues reflected in my patients. I came

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Speaker 1: to really connect with my own passion for mental health

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Speaker 1: and mental wellness, which lead me led me to eventually

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Speaker 1: leave medicine and strike out on this other path as

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Speaker 1: a life coach. So I think the issue of burnout

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Speaker 1: is a complex one. I think we need to throw

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Speaker 1: capitalism under the bus. I think there is not insignificant

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Speaker 1: evidence right there, there's an evidence base. I'm also I

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Speaker 1: have masters in public health. I studied epidemiology, so you know,

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Speaker 1: a NERD's nerd. I think we need to talk about

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Speaker 1: the nervous system when we talk about burnout, as well

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Speaker 1: as cognitive behavioral approaches and looking at our thoughts that

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Speaker 1: are part and parcel of burnout. So I think those

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Speaker 1: are the things that make me a pretty darn great

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Speaker 1: gal to talk to about this issue.

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Speaker 3: Well, I appreciate it, And wow, what an amazing resume

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Speaker 3: here before we, you know, truly truly dive in. I

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Speaker 3: think the first thing that we should do is define,

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Speaker 3: if we can, what burnout really is. So what what

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Speaker 3: would your best definition be?

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Speaker 1: Hmmm? So I think burnout the way I think about

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Speaker 1: it is when we're in system overload. Right, So when

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Speaker 1: our our nervous systems are drenals our heart in the

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Speaker 1: largest sense of that, not the cardiovascular sense. Right, when

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Speaker 1: we have got into a point of overwhelm and exhaustion

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Speaker 1: that our body is, we are outside what's called the

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Speaker 1: window of tolerance or I like Jane Clapp's words, the

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Speaker 1: window of bodily dignity, which is the window in which

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Speaker 1: our nervous system is able to respond to an over excitement,

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Speaker 1: an overactivity of stimuli, and is able to bring us

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Speaker 1: back into the safe and social part of our nervous system.

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Speaker 1: So we get sort of pushed beyond our capacity to

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Speaker 1: bring ourselves back. I'm thinking, I'm like making accordion hands

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Speaker 1: with my like, we get pushed beyond our capacity, pushed

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Speaker 1: beyond push bits, you know, what It's like a rubber band.

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Speaker 1: You stretch it too far, You stretch it too far,

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Speaker 1: You stretch it too far, and eventually it just breaks.

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Speaker 1: And that's sort of what burns is. Yeah, that those

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Speaker 1: internal capacities, those resources to bring ourselves back into coherence

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Speaker 1: with self and with environment, we lose our access to them,

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Speaker 1: our capacity to them. Short term, right, we can, there's

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Speaker 1: ways to bring ourselves back, but it feels quite out of.

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Speaker 2: Our grasp, right, right.

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Speaker 3: And I mean you kind of hinted at some of

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Speaker 3: these before, but there are so many different reasons why

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Speaker 3: burnout can occur.

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Speaker 2: So let's address what some of those could be.

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Speaker 1: You know, I'm always going to start with the fact

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Speaker 1: that employees are being overworked, right, And so there was

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Speaker 1: a study I was reading the other day, I believe,

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Speaker 1: from the Economic Policy Institute, that shows that productivity has

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Speaker 1: increased somewhere in the twenty percent mark in the last decade,

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Speaker 1: but wages have only increased less than two percent. And so, right,

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Speaker 1: employees here in the US, and I'm sure we could

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Speaker 1: look globally, but within this context, folks are push beyond

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Speaker 1: their capacities, right They it is being demanded of them

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Speaker 1: that they work harder, faster, be more productive, produce more

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Speaker 1: for the for the economy. Then they're being compensated for.

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Speaker 1: Then they're being given time off for. And so I

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Speaker 1: think that's a really important driver. And I think we

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Speaker 1: need to start with late stage capitalism and how dangerous

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Speaker 1: it is for employees.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I think that's really important.

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Speaker 3: I also think sometimes this is, you know, a point

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Speaker 3: where it's really important to have open and honest conversations,

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Speaker 3: perhaps with friends, when it comes to capitalism and wages

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Speaker 3: and how hard you're working versus what you're being compensated for,

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Speaker 3: because sometimes, you know, we might feel like we're burning out,

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Speaker 3: but we also feel as though like I should just

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Speaker 3: suck it up.

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Speaker 2: I should just suck it up. I should just suck

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Speaker 2: it up.

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Speaker 3: But you're entitled to know if you're being paid a

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Speaker 3: fair wage for the work that you are doing.

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Speaker 1: Completely agreed, Completely agreed. Yeah, And you know this was

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Speaker 1: something that I saw you. I worked in primary care

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Speaker 1: in many places, but one of them was New York City,

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Speaker 1: and I heard this all the time for my patients,

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Speaker 1: particularly in their twenties and early thirties, where they literally

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Speaker 1: didn't have time to exercise, to rest, to see friends

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Speaker 1: because it was demanded that they be at their job

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Speaker 1: or jobs to pay for student loans, right for four

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Speaker 1: hundred hours a day.

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Speaker 3: You know, yeah, yeah, totally. Obviously we're talking about work

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Speaker 3: stress being a huge cause for burnout, but it's more

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Speaker 3: than that, right, What else can be a cause here

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Speaker 3: for this sort of feeling?

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Speaker 1: Yeah, So my passion is working with human socialized as

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Speaker 1: women to take a look at codependent, perfectionist and people

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Speaker 1: pleasing thought habits. I see that that sort of entire

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Speaker 1: category of thinking as coming from the same wounding, the

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Speaker 1: wounding that says I, I'm not worthy of love, of

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Speaker 1: care of good things. I am not worthy or valuable

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Speaker 1: as a human animal unless someone else is validating that

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Speaker 1: back to me, right, unless I'm getting that good girl

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Speaker 1: from my parents, my boss, my partner, my date, society

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Speaker 1: at large. And so from that framework, of course you're

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Speaker 1: going to overwork. Of course you're going to continue to

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Speaker 1: push yourself. Right that that way of thinking often comes

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Speaker 1: with all or nothing thinking, black and white thinking, good

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Speaker 1: and bad thinking. So if you have a job, you're

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Speaker 1: going to work a million hours a day because you

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Speaker 1: want right, you have that perfectionist loop in your head

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Speaker 1: that says, do it perfectly or your sense of worthiness

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Speaker 1: of being alive is actually at stake.

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Speaker 2: Right, right, And that's no good for anybody.

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Speaker 1: Oh my goodness, No, no, absolutely not not for not

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Speaker 1: for you, not for your family, not for your loved ones,

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Speaker 1: and also not for your job, because once you burn out,

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Speaker 1: you're lost there too, right.

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Speaker 3: And you mentioned I believe the word perfectionism, which then

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Speaker 3: my head goes toward the highlight reel, which is social media,

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Speaker 3: which can would also be a huge source for burnout

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Speaker 3: when we're constantly being surrounded by so much visual simulation

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Speaker 3: and inevitably for many struggling with that comparison trap.

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Speaker 1: Absolutely, I mean capitalism and white settler colonialism both push

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Speaker 1: our brains towards compare and despair. Right. It is part

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Speaker 1: and parcel of those systems to pit us against each other. Right,

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Speaker 1: Instead of having a communal way of thinking that when

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Speaker 1: any of us succeed, this is a success for all, Right,

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Speaker 1: we've stepped out of that collective consciousness in a lot

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Speaker 1: of ways. And instead, you know, it's ugh, I can't

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Speaker 1: believe so and so got engaged, ough, so and so

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Speaker 1: got a raised Ugh, I'm worthless, I'm useless. I don't

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Speaker 1: measure up based. I love that you said highlight reel

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Speaker 1: because you know what else is social media? Right? It's

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Speaker 1: kind of faith that way. There's not a lot of

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Speaker 1: pictures of people being like here, I am at the

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Speaker 1: opposite at two am again and I have to be

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Speaker 1: back at eight because my boss demands it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, there's not that transparency there very often. The next

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Speaker 3: question that truly arises, though, is what would be the

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Speaker 3: difference between something like burnout versus maybe normal exhaustion or

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Speaker 3: perhaps like a different extreme, which could be depression.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. I mean, I'm trying to think if there's like

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Speaker 1: a clinical diagnostic sort of difference. For me, the difference

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Speaker 1: is really like sort of felt in the gut. Right,

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Speaker 1: so we can talk about how burnout literally alters and

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Speaker 1: changes your brain on a chemical and physiologic level. What

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Speaker 1: I would say is that, uh, you know, exhaustion can

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Speaker 1: be midic with a couple nights good rest, right, with

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Speaker 1: shifts in circadian rhythm, with a trip to Cobbo like

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Speaker 1: you just did. Exhaustion can be sort of handled with

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Speaker 1: things that we may think of as more like cotidian,

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Speaker 1: like really actually putting yourself to bed at nine point thirty,

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Speaker 1: like the sweet tender baby, you are like doing things

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Speaker 1: like that, right, ex.

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Speaker 3: Rat by the way, vernaculine right, Okay, so you said

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Speaker 3: sleep exercise B.

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Speaker 1: Twelve right totally, Yeah, Like those things can help if

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Speaker 1: it's just exhaustion, right, and then, but burnout because of

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Speaker 1: the actual changes in our physiology, it's it's something that's

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Speaker 1: more as an organism, we need more complex support to

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Speaker 1: help our bodies, our minds, our spirits to recover from

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Speaker 1: actual burnout.

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Speaker 3: Obviously, burn out a little bit more of a to

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Speaker 3: do than just dealing with a little bit of exhaustion. So,

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Speaker 3: now as we've covered what burnout is, the difference between

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Speaker 3: perhaps burnout and exhaustion, how does one go about treating burnout?

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Speaker 3: And can you do it on your own or should

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Speaker 3: you always seek out professional assistance?

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Speaker 1: I mean the latter's a challenging one, right because as

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Speaker 1: a licensed health care provider, of course I need to

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Speaker 1: say please visit your primary care provider. And having been

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Speaker 1: a primary care provider, I know that you're not going

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Speaker 1: to get much help there, so I've met my legal

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Speaker 1: and ethical duty, but I also know, like it's where

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Speaker 1: is it going to get you? Right, they're not going

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Speaker 1: to do the complex adrenal testing that a functional medicine

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Speaker 1: or holistic provider might. So if that is within your

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Speaker 1: financial capacity to go to functional medicine, to go to

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Speaker 1: a holistic health care provider, to go to acupuncture, to

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Speaker 1: go to body work, I would recommend those things in

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Speaker 1: addition to talking with a counselor a therapist, a coach, right,

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Speaker 1: someone who is focused on helping you to understand the

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Speaker 1: complexity of what burnout really looks like. And of course

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Speaker 1: let us note the irony here, right, if you're feeling

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Speaker 1: wicked burned out, what's the last thing you wanted to do?

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Speaker 1: Maybe talk about it, yeah, right, or like even hunt

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Speaker 1: for someone, see if they take your insurance, see if

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Speaker 1: you're can afford it, make an appointment, schlep across town,

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Speaker 1: find or find park it. You know, it's I mean,

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Speaker 1: one of the pandemic has been horrifying, of course, particularly

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Speaker 1: for black and brown folk, low income folks. But what's

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Speaker 1: been phenomenal about the pandemic is the shift of telehealth

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Speaker 1: and the fact that now so much more is available

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Speaker 1: from your living room. So I do want to remind

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Speaker 1: folks that maybe the schlep part isn't part of it,

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Speaker 1: so consider maybe that doesn't need to be a barrier

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Speaker 1: to care.

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Speaker 3: And I think it's important for us to recognize that

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Speaker 3: it takes a big person to say, okay, yo, I

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Speaker 3: am not well, I retired, I am bent out, So

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Speaker 3: that like that's step number one, right, and then loving

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Speaker 3: yourself enough perhaps or wanting to give yourself the grace

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Speaker 3: of the compassion that you deserve to then say okay,

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Speaker 3: I am going to take responsibility here and do something

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Speaker 3: about it. Because in the moment that first, you know

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Speaker 3: step like figuring out what you're going to do here,

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Speaker 3: that can certainly be overwhelming. But when you take a

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Speaker 3: step back and you think about the benefits that will

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Speaker 3: come hand in hand with you doing something for yourself,

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Speaker 3: with you getting willing to step outside of that comfort

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Speaker 3: zone and make a change that's going to impact this

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Speaker 3: extreme level of burnout that's so worth it in the

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Speaker 3: long haul.

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Speaker 1: Agreed, And this may sound funny, so stay with me

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Speaker 1: for just a second, because Okay, great God, because my

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Speaker 1: clients for the most part, are coming from this codependent

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Speaker 1: framework in which we put others and their wellness, their joy,

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Speaker 1: their everything ahead of our own working to heal from that. Right,

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Speaker 1: we turn that focus, that spotlight that we've shown on

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Speaker 1: everyone else our whole lives, back on ourselves. And this

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Speaker 1: is actually a place where we can recognize the way

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Speaker 1: burnout impacts the prefrontal cortex, it thins it, the way

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Speaker 1: burnout enlarges the amygdala, which increases moodiness, which reduces our

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Speaker 1: stress response. Right, we can have a big startle response.

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Speaker 1: We effectively step out of our normal functioning brain right

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Speaker 1: the way our brain's previously functioned, and into this altered

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Speaker 1: state of being. From there, accessing that self love story, right,

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Speaker 1: I love me enough to do this? Maybe extra challenging

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Speaker 1: when you've spent the last twenty thirty forty fifty sixty

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Speaker 1: years in a codependent framework. And so if the thing

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Speaker 1: that will get you to care, that will get you

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Speaker 1: to rest, that will get you to put your acid

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Speaker 1: bed at nine thirty, and I'm just not kidding about

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Speaker 1: nine thirty, because your adrenals are going to turn back

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Speaker 1: on at ten and like, please be asleep before that happens,

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Speaker 1: before you get that court is all boost and then

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Speaker 1: go into gluconeogenesis around three am, Like, please be in bed.

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Speaker 1: But if the thing that's going to get you to

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Speaker 1: there is you know, I'm gonna do this for my partner,

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna do this for my kids. I'm going to

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Speaker 1: do this for my mom. I'm going to do this

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Speaker 1: for my dog. I'm gonna do this for my boss.

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Speaker 1: Like if that is the motivator that gets you to

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Speaker 1: take care of yourself so that you can then do

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Speaker 1: the internal work to actually I did that from self love,

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Speaker 1: and I can do the next step from self love.

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Speaker 1: I'm out here, like, please get co with us, get healthier, right,

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Speaker 1: get back into you, and then do the thought work

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Speaker 1: I teach. Then do the somatics I teach to to

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Speaker 1: get your head in the place you might want it

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Speaker 1: to get to to prevent burnout the next time by

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Speaker 1: actually prioritizing yourself. But do you see what I'm saying there,

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Speaker 1: Like if your superpower's codependence, like, okay, cool, let's lean

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Speaker 1: on it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, No, I mean I totally, I totally get it.

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Speaker 3: And I I think you're speaking to an issue that

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Speaker 3: so many of us have either struggled with at one

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Speaker 3: point or maybe currently have right now, which is that

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Speaker 3: it is hard sometimes to prioritize ourselves to make the

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Speaker 3: time to invest ourselves, to put our own well being first.

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Speaker 2: But again, you need to have grace with yourself. You

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Speaker 2: need to have some compassion.

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Speaker 3: And by putting yourself first, as you kind of just

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Speaker 3: got at here, you are in turn going to be

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Speaker 3: better to show up for all of the people that

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Speaker 3: you care about, whether it is personally or professionally.

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Speaker 1: Right, right, and yeah, whatever gets you there, right.

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Speaker 3: We started to kind of get into some of the

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Speaker 3: things that you can do on your own at home,

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Speaker 3: perhaps to deal with burnout outside of perhaps seeking out

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Speaker 3: help that you might be able to do virtually or

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Speaker 3: if you're willing to track across to wherever and do

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Speaker 3: it irl, But what else would you suggest that someone

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Speaker 3: does at home aside? You also mentioned that great nine

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Speaker 3: thirty Goldilocks bedtime I love.

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Speaker 1: I love nine thirty bedtime.

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Speaker 2: Samesis right.

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Speaker 1: I also will say I'm built for it. Right. A

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Speaker 1: friend and I were joking last night because I was like,

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Speaker 1: come over and watch a movie and she was like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: so I can watch you sleep on the couch and

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Speaker 1: I was like, yeah, facts, that's right, science, that is

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Speaker 1: what will happen. But only ten out of ten times,

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Speaker 1: so come on over. Yeah, so nine point thirty is

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Speaker 1: a phenomenal time to be in bed, having the same bedtime,

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Speaker 1: the same waketime, our amazing gifts that you can give yourself.

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Speaker 1: I get that that can be really challenging, particularly if

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Speaker 1: you've spent the day putting everyone ahead of yourself. It

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Speaker 1: can seem like once you've closed your computer for the

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Speaker 1: night with work stuff, if there are children's in or

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Speaker 1: partners involved, those people are in bed or otherwise taken

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Speaker 1: care of. I get it, right, Why are in? Our

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Speaker 1: children are in? Our teenagers are like, yo, stay up,

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Speaker 1: you can watch the YouTube, so you can have like

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Speaker 1: an hour to yourself, right, or an introverted friend of

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Speaker 1: mine was telling melast night that they stay up late

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Speaker 1: because it's a time when they can like recharge their

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Speaker 1: batteries and there's no humans involved.

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Speaker 3: Well that's how I feel about the mornings though, Like that,

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Speaker 3: And I feel like, as you're explaining that you're nine

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Speaker 3: thirty to bed person, I assume that maybe you're also

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Speaker 3: a morning person, like to exam babus. Yeah, So I

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Speaker 3: mean that is what I get in the morning. And

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Speaker 3: there's so much research that totes the benefits of being

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Speaker 3: a morning person, not to slam those that just like

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Speaker 3: can't make it happen, But to say that if you're

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Speaker 3: seeking that time and you may be used to finding

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Speaker 3: it on the tail end of your day, I would

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Speaker 3: encourage you to try to tweak that, swrap that and

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Speaker 3: see how it.

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Speaker 2: Makes you feel.

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Speaker 1: Totally. And one of the things that the evidence base

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Speaker 1: shows is we're when we're learning to manage burnout and

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Speaker 1: to help heal from it. Is a thing I teach

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Speaker 1: in my programs so much, which is celebrating ourselves. Right,

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Speaker 1: celebrating ourselves and our small wins, setting small, manageable goals,

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Speaker 1: by which I mean like legit, like oh I had

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Speaker 1: a glass of water today, like just the one, and

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Speaker 1: celebrating it helps with our neuroplasticity. Right. So, when our

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Speaker 1: brains are set to that perfectionist groove, I'm never doing enough.

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Speaker 1: Nothing I do is ever good enough. As we celebrate

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Speaker 1: the tiny our brain's like oh I did a good.

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Speaker 1: I can celebrate me for a good that's amazing, yay

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Speaker 1: me right, and I get it. It might feel like super

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Speaker 1: awkward or you know, boastful, like there's all these problematic words,

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Speaker 1: particularly for human socialized as women. When we celebrate ourselves.

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Speaker 1: And those are reasons why I would say, please do

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Speaker 1: it on the daily. And I bring this up because

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Speaker 1: I deeply believe in taking kitten sized steps, Like baby

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Speaker 1: steps are really big if you think about it, that's

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Speaker 1: like two and a half inches. That's wild for most

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Speaker 1: of us, right, But a kitten sized step that is doable.

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Speaker 1: So we take these kittens size steps. So if you

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Speaker 1: are habitually going to bed at one am, why don't

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Speaker 1: you set the goal of twelve fifty and just setting

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Speaker 1: a little alarm for twelve forty five twelve fifty, turn

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Speaker 1: the phone off and give yourself a week or two

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Speaker 1: or three, however long it takes to get you to

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Speaker 1: twelve fifty. Celebrate yourself every night and build trust with yourself,

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Speaker 1: because that's one of the things that happens in burnout

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Speaker 1: is along the way we trust that other people know

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Speaker 1: better for us than we know for ourselves. Oh, my

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Speaker 1: boss needs us for tomorrow. That must be more important,

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Speaker 1: says that internal script right subconsciously that we're not even hearing.

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Speaker 1: That must be more important than my taking care of me,

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Speaker 1: And so that starts to erode our self trust in

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Speaker 1: these really powerful ways. Again, when that core wounding in

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Speaker 1: our heart is I am not worthy of love and

434
00:24:52,840 --> 00:24:58,320
Speaker 1: care and good things. We're already in that self trust deficit, right,

435
00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:01,600
Speaker 1: and so we get to rebuild that using the power

436
00:25:01,600 --> 00:25:05,760
Speaker 1: of our own neuroplasticity, honoring our nervous system by really

437
00:25:05,800 --> 00:25:09,800
Speaker 1: celebrating ten minutes of change at a time, right, one

438
00:25:09,880 --> 00:25:13,920
Speaker 1: minutes of change at a time, and then you know,

439
00:25:13,960 --> 00:25:16,439
Speaker 1: within six months, maybe you're going to bed at eleven.

440
00:25:17,680 --> 00:25:21,159
Speaker 1: And I would say that that's amazing, because sustainable change

441
00:25:21,200 --> 00:25:23,520
Speaker 1: is slow change right.

442
00:25:23,600 --> 00:25:27,840
Speaker 3: In size steps something I'm gonna the best wine just

443
00:25:28,040 --> 00:25:28,840
Speaker 3: kick well.

444
00:25:28,880 --> 00:25:30,520
Speaker 2: I feel like, are you a cat person? You can

445
00:25:30,560 --> 00:25:31,480
Speaker 2: be honest?

446
00:25:31,920 --> 00:25:34,520
Speaker 1: I'm actually really I mean, so I'm a leo, So

447
00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:37,000
Speaker 1: I'm a lion person. Can the rest of the show

448
00:25:37,000 --> 00:25:41,560
Speaker 1: be talking about my hair? Because that's not mandated. I'm

449
00:25:41,560 --> 00:25:43,040
Speaker 1: more of a dog person. What about you?

450
00:25:43,440 --> 00:25:45,840
Speaker 3: I'm more of a dog person as well. But I mean,

451
00:25:45,920 --> 00:25:48,159
Speaker 3: puppies can also take big steps. So I think the

452
00:25:48,600 --> 00:25:53,800
Speaker 3: analogy really, it really is tiny. It's so tiny, Okay, So,

453
00:25:53,880 --> 00:25:57,199
Speaker 3: I mean we talked about kitten sized steps, going to

454
00:25:57,240 --> 00:26:02,040
Speaker 3: bed earlier, prioritizing yourself. Yeah, maybe talking with the professional

455
00:26:02,440 --> 00:26:05,200
Speaker 3: something that we haven't addressed here at all. And I'm

456
00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:07,640
Speaker 3: wondering if you have anything to throw into the mix

457
00:26:07,680 --> 00:26:11,879
Speaker 3: here when it comes to our diets, and yoah, can.

458
00:26:11,720 --> 00:26:12,960
Speaker 2: We talk about that for hot talk?

459
00:26:13,240 --> 00:26:17,360
Speaker 1: We can. Yeah. I always want to be thoughtful, right,

460
00:26:17,440 --> 00:26:19,600
Speaker 1: because one of the things that can go with burnout

461
00:26:19,840 --> 00:26:23,200
Speaker 1: is well. Within the New York contexts, I often saw

462
00:26:23,240 --> 00:26:29,720
Speaker 1: a lot of orthorexia alongside, right, folks who were overworking.

463
00:26:29,840 --> 00:26:33,240
Speaker 1: And again this is in the context of insurance based

464
00:26:33,240 --> 00:26:37,479
Speaker 1: primary care. Right, So people with access to financial resources were,

465
00:26:37,960 --> 00:26:41,720
Speaker 1: you know, working these forty hour days and we're scared

466
00:26:41,840 --> 00:26:46,240
Speaker 1: of eating anything outside the clean regimen. Right, it's like

467
00:26:46,320 --> 00:26:50,399
Speaker 1: the more culturally acceptable eating disorder, right, because it's a

468
00:26:50,640 --> 00:26:54,800
Speaker 1: it's control, but it looks like clean eating. So it's like,

469
00:26:55,000 --> 00:26:59,680
Speaker 1: you know, women's magazines approved. So I always just want

470
00:26:59,720 --> 00:27:04,879
Speaker 1: to be but right, I mean wrong right, not.

471
00:27:04,760 --> 00:27:07,240
Speaker 3: Wrong, which is awful, but I would like to fuck

472
00:27:07,359 --> 00:27:09,360
Speaker 3: to think as someone. I would like to think, as

473
00:27:09,359 --> 00:27:14,719
Speaker 3: someone who has a legacy background in women's magazines that

474
00:27:15,040 --> 00:27:17,960
Speaker 3: they're starting to get better with the way they talk

475
00:27:18,080 --> 00:27:20,600
Speaker 3: to their girl anyway.

476
00:27:20,320 --> 00:27:23,840
Speaker 1: Quote unquote, So let's stay biochemically, why don't we do that, right.

477
00:27:23,800 --> 00:27:26,360
Speaker 2: Let's talk, Let's talk biochemically, why don't we.

478
00:27:26,480 --> 00:27:31,879
Speaker 1: What everyone adjust your safety glasses. We're going to nerd,

479
00:27:32,760 --> 00:27:34,400
Speaker 1: Not that we haven't been nerding for like an hour,

480
00:27:34,480 --> 00:27:38,560
Speaker 1: but yeah, you know, if we think about putting stimulants

481
00:27:38,560 --> 00:27:41,640
Speaker 1: into our body, right, So in burnout, we are adrenalized.

482
00:27:41,800 --> 00:27:41,960
Speaker 2: Right.

483
00:27:42,040 --> 00:27:46,000
Speaker 1: Our bodies, how are often flooded with sympathetic activation, which

484
00:27:46,160 --> 00:27:49,399
Speaker 1: is the fire or flight portion of our nervous system.

485
00:27:49,800 --> 00:27:52,960
Speaker 1: As these demands are put upon us, and we put

486
00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:57,000
Speaker 1: demands upon ourselves, our bodies are full of adrenaline, nor

487
00:27:57,000 --> 00:27:58,960
Speaker 1: epinephrin eventually cortisol.

488
00:27:59,160 --> 00:27:59,280
Speaker 3: Right.

489
00:27:59,320 --> 00:28:02,840
Speaker 1: This is where the term adrenal fatigue, which is not sciency.

490
00:28:02,960 --> 00:28:05,600
Speaker 1: It's not a great term because organs don't get fatigued,

491
00:28:05,640 --> 00:28:09,639
Speaker 1: but colloquially like it works, so I covey on it

492
00:28:09,640 --> 00:28:12,080
Speaker 1: and then I use it. But when we think about

493
00:28:12,119 --> 00:28:15,479
Speaker 1: adrenal fatigue, our adrenals have been putting out all these

494
00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:19,840
Speaker 1: stress hormones, and so once that system is maxed out

495
00:28:20,240 --> 00:28:23,159
Speaker 1: and we're not getting those little like blips of adrenaline,

496
00:28:23,240 --> 00:28:25,720
Speaker 1: we need to be able to get up and put

497
00:28:25,720 --> 00:28:28,760
Speaker 1: on shoes and be a functional mammal in the world

498
00:28:29,840 --> 00:28:32,560
Speaker 1: when we're at that deficit. Or of course we're exhausted,

499
00:28:33,480 --> 00:28:36,240
Speaker 1: right because we're not getting those chemicals that we need.

500
00:28:36,280 --> 00:28:39,720
Speaker 1: And so quite frankly, within this culture of the society

501
00:28:39,760 --> 00:28:43,400
Speaker 1: here in the US, what we are taught to do

502
00:28:43,560 --> 00:28:46,320
Speaker 1: is to put caffeine on it, to put sugar on it,

503
00:28:46,760 --> 00:28:49,280
Speaker 1: to put gluten on it, right, to put quick carbs

504
00:28:49,320 --> 00:28:49,640
Speaker 1: on it.

505
00:28:50,160 --> 00:28:52,560
Speaker 3: I was going to say, I put reservatrol on it.

506
00:28:53,160 --> 00:28:57,600
Speaker 3: Well I reached right for the red wi right.

507
00:28:57,680 --> 00:29:03,080
Speaker 1: Oh, so that's the evening wine down from the all

508
00:29:03,200 --> 00:29:06,120
Speaker 1: day over like over hyping yourself to make up for

509
00:29:06,160 --> 00:29:10,240
Speaker 1: the fact that you physiologically can't hype yourself right, right,

510
00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:13,480
Speaker 1: And so it's like espresso all morning and the croissants

511
00:29:14,320 --> 00:29:17,560
Speaker 1: and then some pizza, right, and we're going for fast

512
00:29:17,600 --> 00:29:21,040
Speaker 1: carves because as mammals that make science, right, So, brains

513
00:29:21,040 --> 00:29:24,720
Speaker 1: can eat two things, glucose and ketone bodies. Ketone bodies

514
00:29:24,760 --> 00:29:28,800
Speaker 1: come from fat and glucose. Well, glucose is delicious, right,

515
00:29:28,920 --> 00:29:33,280
Speaker 1: And so when brains are overworked, they're like, yo, give

516
00:29:33,320 --> 00:29:37,760
Speaker 1: me calories, make them carbs make them now. And so

517
00:29:39,000 --> 00:29:43,000
Speaker 1: again not demonizing any foods or any food groups, but

518
00:29:43,440 --> 00:29:45,880
Speaker 1: when you're putting fast carbs on it, and you're putting

519
00:29:45,920 --> 00:29:51,680
Speaker 1: sugar and caffeine on burnout. You're not doing your physiology

520
00:29:51,800 --> 00:29:54,960
Speaker 1: any favors, because what you're at a deficit of is

521
00:29:55,000 --> 00:29:59,400
Speaker 1: the neurotransmitters that will help you to feel more relaxed,

522
00:30:00,680 --> 00:30:04,000
Speaker 1: more grounded, more centered. Right, we can talk about how

523
00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:06,440
Speaker 1: to put thought work, the thought work, the cognitive behavioral

524
00:30:06,440 --> 00:30:08,880
Speaker 1: thought work that I teach on top of that to

525
00:30:08,880 --> 00:30:12,400
Speaker 1: help you make different decisions. But what your physiology really

526
00:30:12,480 --> 00:30:18,200
Speaker 1: needs is fat and protein, right, is avocados and coconut

527
00:30:18,280 --> 00:30:22,320
Speaker 1: oil and coconut milk. And I'm Argentine, so have another steak.

528
00:30:22,400 --> 00:30:28,440
Speaker 1: Please write vegetables, some fruits. But what your body does

529
00:30:28,480 --> 00:30:32,040
Speaker 1: not need is the fast calories. And that's the irony.

530
00:30:32,120 --> 00:30:43,320
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531
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536
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567
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572
00:33:08,760 --> 00:33:11,520
Speaker 3: mentioned the thought work that you would kind of top

573
00:33:11,600 --> 00:33:14,000
Speaker 3: onto this, so I would love to kind of dive

574
00:33:14,040 --> 00:33:15,880
Speaker 3: into that as one of the last things that we

575
00:33:15,960 --> 00:33:19,760
Speaker 3: cover here today. Talk to me about where someone even

576
00:33:19,880 --> 00:33:24,880
Speaker 3: begins with that self talk when it comes to navigating burnout.

577
00:33:25,200 --> 00:33:28,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, so I think what's really important. I always talk

578
00:33:28,600 --> 00:33:31,960
Speaker 1: about the three a's awareness, acceptance, and action. So we

579
00:33:32,040 --> 00:33:35,960
Speaker 1: need to recognize what's going on before we can change it. Right,

580
00:33:36,360 --> 00:33:38,080
Speaker 1: you don't know to change the light bulb until you

581
00:33:38,080 --> 00:33:42,240
Speaker 1: realize it's gone out, So that awareness starts with stepping

582
00:33:42,280 --> 00:33:46,000
Speaker 1: into being our own watcher, our own observer, right being

583
00:33:46,240 --> 00:33:50,440
Speaker 1: recognizing that we are not our thoughts. We are the

584
00:33:50,520 --> 00:33:54,880
Speaker 1: human having those thoughts. Right, We are the embodied human

585
00:33:55,040 --> 00:33:57,440
Speaker 1: moving through the world. And so many of my clients

586
00:33:57,920 --> 00:34:02,000
Speaker 1: live their lives from their head up and are so disembodied.

587
00:34:02,080 --> 00:34:05,080
Speaker 1: I mean not literally. They have a human body, but

588
00:34:05,440 --> 00:34:07,840
Speaker 1: they are not connected to it in a way that

589
00:34:08,640 --> 00:34:12,879
Speaker 1: helps them to really feel Okay, I'm getting adrenalized.

590
00:34:13,000 --> 00:34:13,160
Speaker 3: Right.

591
00:34:13,440 --> 00:34:15,840
Speaker 1: Their brain just starts to tell the story, Oh, I'm anxious,

592
00:34:16,040 --> 00:34:19,719
Speaker 1: I need to work harder, right, or they don't recognize, oh,

593
00:34:19,840 --> 00:34:23,560
Speaker 1: I'm this moment of overwhelm is leading me into dorsal

594
00:34:23,560 --> 00:34:27,480
Speaker 1: shut down, the freeze part of our autonomic nervous system.

595
00:34:28,239 --> 00:34:30,520
Speaker 1: It's hard to recognize it as such so that we

596
00:34:30,560 --> 00:34:33,920
Speaker 1: can support ourselves to shift our nervous system state if

597
00:34:33,920 --> 00:34:37,920
Speaker 1: we don't know what's going on, so that self awareness

598
00:34:38,040 --> 00:34:42,760
Speaker 1: is really key. Meditation is phenomenal. It's not for everyone.

599
00:34:42,880 --> 00:34:45,040
Speaker 1: For folks with a lot of trauma in their history,

600
00:34:45,400 --> 00:34:48,120
Speaker 1: it's probably not a great place to start. Instead, I

601
00:34:48,160 --> 00:34:50,359
Speaker 1: would start with what I find to be more accessible,

602
00:34:50,800 --> 00:34:52,960
Speaker 1: and the evidence base shows to be more accessible for

603
00:34:53,040 --> 00:34:57,360
Speaker 1: more people, which is mindfulness. Right, as I put my

604
00:34:57,440 --> 00:35:01,160
Speaker 1: jewelry on in the morning, I take a breath, put

605
00:35:01,160 --> 00:35:04,040
Speaker 1: my earring on. Feel the weight now on my ear,

606
00:35:04,960 --> 00:35:08,160
Speaker 1: Put a necklace on, feel it land on my chest,

607
00:35:09,000 --> 00:35:11,560
Speaker 1: put my rings on, right, Like, it doesn't have to

608
00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:14,239
Speaker 1: be complex expensive, it's not, of course, you need to

609
00:35:14,280 --> 00:35:18,400
Speaker 1: take it's really just inviting yourself. And again I would

610
00:35:18,520 --> 00:35:21,600
Speaker 1: I'm I'm a witch who's really into ritual right. So

611
00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:25,560
Speaker 1: the end, the evidence based shows when we tie new

612
00:35:25,600 --> 00:35:28,320
Speaker 1: habits the things we do anyway, we have more success

613
00:35:28,360 --> 00:35:33,160
Speaker 1: long term habits stacking right exactly. So I love the

614
00:35:33,200 --> 00:35:35,080
Speaker 1: science and I love the woe. So let's put it

615
00:35:35,120 --> 00:35:38,279
Speaker 1: together and call it a ritual. Right, So pick a

616
00:35:38,280 --> 00:35:41,200
Speaker 1: thing from your day, when I make tea, when I

617
00:35:41,480 --> 00:35:44,960
Speaker 1: you know, when I put my shoes on. Whatever you're

618
00:35:45,000 --> 00:35:48,200
Speaker 1: going to do anyway, slow down, but slow down by

619
00:35:48,239 --> 00:35:52,080
Speaker 1: like milliseconds, not hours, right, Like you don't have to

620
00:35:52,080 --> 00:35:55,960
Speaker 1: go to an Ohtaga retreat, so gone, that's great, But

621
00:35:56,760 --> 00:36:01,000
Speaker 1: take a millisecond to get present with the things you're doing.

622
00:36:01,800 --> 00:36:04,120
Speaker 1: So as you increase your time at task, with that,

623
00:36:04,680 --> 00:36:08,600
Speaker 1: you increase your awareness of yourself and your body, your

624
00:36:08,600 --> 00:36:12,560
Speaker 1: awareness of how different things actually make you feel. In

625
00:36:12,600 --> 00:36:16,840
Speaker 1: your physiology somatically meaning in the body, and not just

626
00:36:16,880 --> 00:36:20,600
Speaker 1: what your cognitions. Your thoughts are about those experiences in

627
00:36:20,640 --> 00:36:24,279
Speaker 1: your life. And so my work is a combination of

628
00:36:24,320 --> 00:36:28,840
Speaker 1: a cognitive behavioral based thought work protocol and somatic work

629
00:36:29,000 --> 00:36:32,919
Speaker 1: deeply based in the body, right bottom up, somatic, top

630
00:36:33,080 --> 00:36:37,920
Speaker 1: down cognitive. And so what I support my clients in

631
00:36:37,960 --> 00:36:41,319
Speaker 1: doing is that physical awareness that comes from being your

632
00:36:41,320 --> 00:36:46,280
Speaker 1: own watcher, combined with actively consciously looking at your thoughts.

633
00:36:46,440 --> 00:36:49,959
Speaker 1: So if you're racing through your day having the thought,

634
00:36:50,080 --> 00:36:53,600
Speaker 1: repeating the thought, I am so overwhelmed, I'll never get

635
00:36:53,600 --> 00:36:56,480
Speaker 1: this done. My to do list is so long, this

636
00:36:56,640 --> 00:36:58,480
Speaker 1: is just too much. Oh my god, I'm going to

637
00:36:58,520 --> 00:37:00,799
Speaker 1: fail at everything is going to be the worst. My

638
00:37:00,800 --> 00:37:04,920
Speaker 1: boss is gonna hate this. The more you're repeating those stories,

639
00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:09,400
Speaker 1: the more you're engaging your your neuroplasticity around those stories.

640
00:37:09,880 --> 00:37:14,640
Speaker 1: So you're reinforcing those neural grooves within your own mind

641
00:37:15,200 --> 00:37:19,240
Speaker 1: that tell you you're overwhelmed, you're a failure, everything's lost, everything's terrible.

642
00:37:19,880 --> 00:37:23,400
Speaker 1: So again, by bringing in mindfulness, being your own watcher,

643
00:37:23,760 --> 00:37:29,000
Speaker 1: recognizing oh, I do repeat those stories. I repeat them

644
00:37:29,000 --> 00:37:32,600
Speaker 1: all day, every day, fascinating Okay, So what I say

645
00:37:32,640 --> 00:37:36,160
Speaker 1: in my head, I'm so overwhelmed. What do I feel

646
00:37:36,239 --> 00:37:40,120
Speaker 1: in my body? Oh? I feel a flutter in my heart.

647
00:37:40,400 --> 00:37:44,000
Speaker 1: I feel a little nauseous. I have diarrhea like five

648
00:37:44,040 --> 00:37:47,680
Speaker 1: minutes later. Girl, I did gas reentrology for a long time.

649
00:37:47,920 --> 00:37:48,680
Speaker 1: It's so real.

650
00:37:49,760 --> 00:37:51,360
Speaker 2: Here we are, but we are.

651
00:37:51,400 --> 00:37:54,719
Speaker 3: Your thoughts impact your gut and your gut like it's

652
00:37:54,719 --> 00:37:55,880
Speaker 3: all everything ties.

653
00:37:55,680 --> 00:37:58,759
Speaker 1: To your gut. Right, It's just autonomic nervous system, right,

654
00:37:58,840 --> 00:38:00,799
Speaker 1: because when you're in I mean, and so if you

655
00:38:00,800 --> 00:38:03,960
Speaker 1: think about it, what is stress? It is a lion

656
00:38:04,280 --> 00:38:07,799
Speaker 1: chasing you across the Sahara right about to snack on

657
00:38:07,880 --> 00:38:10,120
Speaker 1: you and everyone you've ever met, and you're going to

658
00:38:10,239 --> 00:38:13,640
Speaker 1: die immediately. And our bodies don't really get the difference

659
00:38:13,680 --> 00:38:16,960
Speaker 1: between line attack and three am text from your boss.

660
00:38:17,560 --> 00:38:19,359
Speaker 1: And so if you're going to run from a line,

661
00:38:19,360 --> 00:38:21,080
Speaker 1: are you going to do it with a colon full?

662
00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:22,640
Speaker 1: Are you gonna?

663
00:38:23,280 --> 00:38:25,279
Speaker 2: Right now? You're gonna clean that out?

664
00:38:25,360 --> 00:38:27,080
Speaker 1: You can clean that out. You're gonna do a little

665
00:38:27,080 --> 00:38:30,960
Speaker 1: self colonic there right on the Sahara. So right, but

666
00:38:31,040 --> 00:38:34,080
Speaker 1: I see, you know when I was doing GI work,

667
00:38:34,160 --> 00:38:38,799
Speaker 1: I was all these otherwise healthy young women with quote

668
00:38:38,880 --> 00:38:42,120
Speaker 1: unquote IBS, where I was like, this is just complete bs.

669
00:38:42,719 --> 00:38:46,800
Speaker 1: This is stress, this is trauma, This is the demands

670
00:38:46,840 --> 00:38:49,520
Speaker 1: of our modern life and the fact that we are

671
00:38:49,560 --> 00:38:52,839
Speaker 1: not taught how to regulate our nervous system right, which

672
00:38:53,160 --> 00:38:55,000
Speaker 1: which for me is at the core of the work

673
00:38:55,040 --> 00:38:58,600
Speaker 1: I do, because when our nervous systems are disregulated, which

674
00:38:58,640 --> 00:39:00,879
Speaker 1: means again that we are in that fight or flight

675
00:39:01,040 --> 00:39:04,560
Speaker 1: or dorsal shut down freeze state, which is often at

676
00:39:04,600 --> 00:39:07,759
Speaker 1: the what like actual burnout looks like is we've been

677
00:39:07,920 --> 00:39:11,160
Speaker 1: so hyped up that our bodies are like, shut her down.

678
00:39:11,960 --> 00:39:16,960
Speaker 1: This is not sustainable again biochemically or energetically or spiritually.

679
00:39:17,280 --> 00:39:21,439
Speaker 1: So we go into that freeze and we can't do much.

680
00:39:21,680 --> 00:39:26,040
Speaker 3: For the person who they are now observing. They're observing

681
00:39:26,080 --> 00:39:29,000
Speaker 3: that they're saying, Wow, I'm so overwhelmed. Sure, I'm never

682
00:39:29,000 --> 00:39:33,280
Speaker 3: going to get all this done. Now let's offer them

683
00:39:33,640 --> 00:39:36,600
Speaker 3: the Okay, I see this, What do I say to

684
00:39:36,640 --> 00:39:37,800
Speaker 3: myself instead?

685
00:39:38,120 --> 00:39:43,520
Speaker 1: Right? So it really awareness, acceptance action. Before we jump

686
00:39:43,560 --> 00:39:48,279
Speaker 1: to action, we need to pause an acceptance. And I

687
00:39:48,320 --> 00:39:50,640
Speaker 1: think I have found in the last decade of doing

688
00:39:50,680 --> 00:39:52,879
Speaker 1: this work and in my own work as well, that

689
00:39:52,880 --> 00:39:56,720
Speaker 1: that is the most challenging step for folks, particularly coming

690
00:39:56,719 --> 00:39:59,359
Speaker 1: from these perfectionists in people pleasing thought habits. We want

691
00:39:59,360 --> 00:40:01,399
Speaker 1: to take action, we want to do the next thing.

692
00:40:01,920 --> 00:40:04,319
Speaker 1: But it's taking action and action and action and action

693
00:40:04,560 --> 00:40:10,200
Speaker 1: and not breathing, accepting, resting. That is part and parcel

694
00:40:10,239 --> 00:40:14,520
Speaker 1: of getting us here right. And so before we jump

695
00:40:14,560 --> 00:40:18,600
Speaker 1: to changing our thoughts, it is vital that we sit

696
00:40:18,680 --> 00:40:24,520
Speaker 1: with them, that we recognize the physiologic somadic reverberations, the

697
00:40:24,600 --> 00:40:28,240
Speaker 1: feelings that occur in our body when we have that thought,

698
00:40:28,239 --> 00:40:32,400
Speaker 1: I'm so overwhelmed. So how does that make you feel?

699
00:40:32,760 --> 00:40:32,960
Speaker 2: Right?

700
00:40:33,080 --> 00:40:40,279
Speaker 1: It makes despondent, angry, sad, right, but really getting in

701
00:40:40,320 --> 00:40:43,360
Speaker 1: touch with the feeling and allowing the feeling to exist

702
00:40:43,440 --> 00:40:46,600
Speaker 1: in your body because if not, I mean, the real

703
00:40:47,760 --> 00:40:51,279
Speaker 1: danger seems a little maybe overwrought, but maybe not right.

704
00:40:51,719 --> 00:40:54,680
Speaker 1: Let's say it. The danger of this work, Yeah it works,

705
00:40:55,440 --> 00:41:00,319
Speaker 1: is emotional bypassing, spiritual bypassing, using something like the thought

706
00:41:00,360 --> 00:41:05,680
Speaker 1: work protocol to jump over the human experience of recognizing

707
00:41:05,680 --> 00:41:08,320
Speaker 1: that if your body is telling you this feels like crap,

708
00:41:09,480 --> 00:41:13,160
Speaker 1: it's maybe because this isn't good for you. It's maybe

709
00:41:13,200 --> 00:41:17,560
Speaker 1: because a change is needed. When that is possible, right

710
00:41:17,680 --> 00:41:23,040
Speaker 1: if it is within your capacity to change it. That's

711
00:41:23,080 --> 00:41:24,600
Speaker 1: the message from your body.

712
00:41:25,080 --> 00:41:29,560
Speaker 3: Right right, Okay, So acceptance super is super is KOI?

713
00:41:30,239 --> 00:41:34,480
Speaker 1: And really and just letting yourself cry about it, letting

714
00:41:34,520 --> 00:41:38,560
Speaker 1: yourself mash your fists and throw a temper tantrum about it,

715
00:41:39,000 --> 00:41:41,360
Speaker 1: letting yourself be a four year old and a twelve

716
00:41:41,440 --> 00:41:47,000
Speaker 1: year old and let your inner children just let it out. Right.

717
00:41:48,600 --> 00:41:51,640
Speaker 1: So from there, from really having felt the feelings, which

718
00:41:51,680 --> 00:41:54,479
Speaker 1: again I recognize is really challenging because we're not taught

719
00:41:54,520 --> 00:41:57,239
Speaker 1: to do that. Where it's hot to suppress our feelings,

720
00:41:57,560 --> 00:41:59,719
Speaker 1: then we take action, and we do that again by

721
00:42:00,080 --> 00:42:03,120
Speaker 1: hr neuroplasticity. So I invite my clients to pick a

722
00:42:03,160 --> 00:42:07,160
Speaker 1: new thought, a new thought that they believe in their physiology.

723
00:42:07,320 --> 00:42:12,520
Speaker 1: So I don't do like toxic positivity, you know, hashtag

724
00:42:12,560 --> 00:42:16,920
Speaker 1: positive vibes only not my jam. It's from a host

725
00:42:16,960 --> 00:42:21,360
Speaker 1: of reasons, primary of which is like, that's not neuroscience,

726
00:42:21,440 --> 00:42:22,719
Speaker 1: that's not how brains work.

727
00:42:22,800 --> 00:42:22,960
Speaker 2: Right.

728
00:42:23,000 --> 00:42:25,080
Speaker 1: You can't lie to yourself and expect your brain and

729
00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:29,719
Speaker 1: body and spirit to like actually change, right, There's no

730
00:42:29,760 --> 00:42:33,440
Speaker 1: need to gaslight ourselves. So instead we pick a thought

731
00:42:33,560 --> 00:42:37,360
Speaker 1: that we can believe, and that resonates in our body

732
00:42:37,400 --> 00:42:40,880
Speaker 1: as believable, right, and we recognize. So wait, how do

733
00:42:40,960 --> 00:42:43,160
Speaker 1: I know what it feels like in my body when

734
00:42:43,160 --> 00:42:45,640
Speaker 1: something is believable? So you start with something that feels

735
00:42:45,640 --> 00:42:51,160
Speaker 1: like a true deep fact for you. I love my grandma,

736
00:42:51,960 --> 00:42:54,480
Speaker 1: so you feel into it. Right. So when I think

737
00:42:54,520 --> 00:42:57,280
Speaker 1: about my Alita, let's let me think about my Abuela

738
00:42:57,760 --> 00:43:01,919
Speaker 1: Marta Veatris. When I think about her, oh, I get

739
00:43:01,960 --> 00:43:04,759
Speaker 1: like this warm blue energy in my chest and it

740
00:43:04,880 --> 00:43:09,200
Speaker 1: vibrates and it sort of radiates outward. And that's what

741
00:43:09,239 --> 00:43:13,680
Speaker 1: truth feels like in my body? Is that sensation? So

742
00:43:13,760 --> 00:43:15,840
Speaker 1: then when I'm looking to create a new thought in

743
00:43:15,880 --> 00:43:21,160
Speaker 1: my thought work, such as let's see my worth isn't

744
00:43:21,200 --> 00:43:25,239
Speaker 1: tied to my productivity, perhaps you feel in and check in.

745
00:43:25,440 --> 00:43:28,279
Speaker 1: Does that resonate as truth when you are in the

746
00:43:28,320 --> 00:43:32,160
Speaker 1: depths of burnout? It may not. Right from your socialization

747
00:43:32,239 --> 00:43:36,200
Speaker 1: and your conditioning, it may not, and so we bridge

748
00:43:36,239 --> 00:43:41,279
Speaker 1: to it. I believe that it is possible that someday

749
00:43:41,680 --> 00:43:45,239
Speaker 1: I can disarticulate my self worth as a mammal and

750
00:43:45,320 --> 00:43:48,440
Speaker 1: my production within late stage capitalism. I believe that it

751
00:43:48,480 --> 00:43:52,200
Speaker 1: is possible that someday right, And I invite my clients

752
00:43:52,239 --> 00:43:55,360
Speaker 1: to create a bridge that's like the Taconic plus the

753
00:43:55,440 --> 00:43:59,560
Speaker 1: Tribeorro plus the GW plus the Arizona. If you're not

754
00:43:59,560 --> 00:44:01,120
Speaker 1: finding you are looking up.

755
00:44:02,480 --> 00:44:06,200
Speaker 3: I love this because it's a great example of your

756
00:44:06,480 --> 00:44:10,760
Speaker 3: use of kitten size SaaS. And I mean if anyone

757
00:44:11,000 --> 00:44:15,640
Speaker 3: was able to come up with a action that was

758
00:44:15,880 --> 00:44:20,600
Speaker 3: as lengthy and yet still articulate as you were just

759
00:44:20,680 --> 00:44:24,080
Speaker 3: able to craft, I would be phenomenally impressed.

760
00:44:24,840 --> 00:44:27,880
Speaker 1: Why thank you, Why thank you? Why thank you?

761
00:44:27,880 --> 00:44:29,560
Speaker 3: But I think it's important what you're getting at here

762
00:44:29,600 --> 00:44:32,440
Speaker 3: is really important, which is that you want. If it

763
00:44:32,480 --> 00:44:36,279
Speaker 3: doesn't feel true to who you are, then it's it's

764
00:44:36,320 --> 00:44:39,440
Speaker 3: almost worthless, right if you are going to sit at

765
00:44:39,440 --> 00:44:43,120
Speaker 3: your desk and just repeat to yourself, I can do this.

766
00:44:43,160 --> 00:44:44,880
Speaker 2: And I mean that's a very ble Land statement, but

767
00:44:44,960 --> 00:44:46,400
Speaker 2: I can do this. I can do this. I can

768
00:44:46,440 --> 00:44:46,960
Speaker 2: do this good.

769
00:44:47,120 --> 00:44:52,000
Speaker 3: And it's not that might not stir the positivity and

770
00:44:52,000 --> 00:44:55,160
Speaker 3: that positive, great blue energy that you were talking about

771
00:44:55,560 --> 00:44:57,640
Speaker 3: in a way that's going to be helpful. But what

772
00:44:57,760 --> 00:45:00,840
Speaker 3: can do something helpful is get I really honest with

773
00:45:00,880 --> 00:45:03,600
Speaker 3: yourself about what's a good thing that I can put

774
00:45:03,640 --> 00:45:05,840
Speaker 3: into my body right now that I can tell myself

775
00:45:05,880 --> 00:45:09,600
Speaker 3: right now, it's going to make me a happier and

776
00:45:09,760 --> 00:45:16,200
Speaker 3: perhaps even more productive person, right or less productive if

777
00:45:16,200 --> 00:45:20,840
Speaker 3: that makes you feel good, right, if that makes you

778
00:45:20,880 --> 00:45:24,640
Speaker 3: feel good? Okay, I love these three a's things.

779
00:45:24,680 --> 00:45:25,320
Speaker 2: So helpful.

780
00:45:25,400 --> 00:45:28,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's so helpful for me too. Yeah.

781
00:45:29,000 --> 00:45:32,239
Speaker 3: Anything that we haven't double clicked on yet that we

782
00:45:32,239 --> 00:45:35,560
Speaker 3: should make time for before I let you go when

783
00:45:35,600 --> 00:45:36,760
Speaker 3: it comes to burnout.

784
00:45:36,800 --> 00:45:39,800
Speaker 2: Any other wisdom that you want to dispel on the hurdlers.

785
00:45:40,280 --> 00:45:45,400
Speaker 1: Yeah. Nature keeps coming to me really powerfully, right, so

786
00:45:45,400 --> 00:45:47,600
Speaker 1: so many of us, particularly those of us who live

787
00:45:47,719 --> 00:45:51,160
Speaker 1: in big cities. I recently moved up to the Hudson

788
00:45:51,239 --> 00:45:55,280
Speaker 1: Valley after a very very very long time on occupied

789
00:45:55,360 --> 00:45:58,720
Speaker 1: Lanape territory in Brooklyn, New York. Still on occupied Lanape

790
00:45:58,800 --> 00:46:02,280
Speaker 1: territory up here, but I have access to nature now,

791
00:46:02,520 --> 00:46:06,480
Speaker 1: which is such a gift and a privilege that I am.

792
00:46:06,680 --> 00:46:08,840
Speaker 1: I you know, I don't sleep on that for like

793
00:46:08,880 --> 00:46:11,000
Speaker 1: a millisecond that I get to open my window and

794
00:46:11,120 --> 00:46:16,200
Speaker 1: there's fresh air and trees. Nature is a powerful resource

795
00:46:16,239 --> 00:46:20,400
Speaker 1: for our nervous system. We come from nature. She wants

796
00:46:19,719 --> 00:46:24,200
Speaker 1: our best everything, and so there's actually a study that

797
00:46:24,239 --> 00:46:27,760
Speaker 1: shows that people with plants in their office report less burnout.

798
00:46:28,920 --> 00:46:32,640
Speaker 1: And I think it's it's bringing nature and recognizing that

799
00:46:33,160 --> 00:46:35,480
Speaker 1: ventral vagel, which is the safe and social part of

800
00:46:35,480 --> 00:46:38,960
Speaker 1: our nervous system, can be found when we connect inward

801
00:46:39,360 --> 00:46:42,759
Speaker 1: and connect inward towards nature. So if you live in

802
00:46:42,800 --> 00:46:46,320
Speaker 1: a city, that can be again, a plant in your office.

803
00:46:46,560 --> 00:46:51,040
Speaker 1: It really is. There's studies that show that visualizing and

804
00:46:51,440 --> 00:46:54,400
Speaker 1: really powerfully visualizing the thing we want, the thing we

805
00:46:54,440 --> 00:46:57,400
Speaker 1: want to connect with, the thing we need, can actually

806
00:46:57,440 --> 00:47:01,560
Speaker 1: have really significant impacts on our nerves a system. So

807
00:47:01,640 --> 00:47:04,759
Speaker 1: even just taking and again we're gonna we habit, stack it.

808
00:47:05,400 --> 00:47:09,040
Speaker 1: Every time you pee, don't take your phone in there,

809
00:47:10,239 --> 00:47:15,040
Speaker 1: close your eyes and picture nature, a field, a tree,

810
00:47:15,200 --> 00:47:16,960
Speaker 1: a bird, a Deer's.

811
00:47:17,560 --> 00:47:20,560
Speaker 2: Right, who doesn't want to think about deers when they're peeing?

812
00:47:21,000 --> 00:47:26,360
Speaker 1: Fools? Fools and idiots, morons. Now I'm dead.

813
00:47:26,640 --> 00:47:30,160
Speaker 3: I'm said, I'll think about crashing ocean waves. That feels

814
00:47:30,160 --> 00:47:31,360
Speaker 3: appropriate for the scenario.

815
00:47:31,560 --> 00:47:35,560
Speaker 1: I really that is actually a more appropriate pea based meditation.

816
00:47:35,800 --> 00:47:39,080
Speaker 1: And I appreciate your taking us to there. I woke

817
00:47:39,160 --> 00:47:42,080
Speaker 1: up this morning. Thank you. I appreciate thank you, My sister,

818
00:47:42,320 --> 00:47:45,600
Speaker 1: I woke up this morning to a yard full of deers.

819
00:47:45,640 --> 00:47:48,840
Speaker 1: Deers or it's not it's a deer. I'm an e

820
00:47:49,000 --> 00:47:53,640
Speaker 1: sl kid, and sometimes saying things wrongly just makes my

821
00:47:53,680 --> 00:47:57,880
Speaker 1: brain very amused. O man, I am Yeah, started with

822
00:47:57,920 --> 00:47:59,400
Speaker 1: that disclaimer at the front.

823
00:48:01,040 --> 00:48:01,920
Speaker 2: Oh my god.

824
00:48:02,000 --> 00:48:05,799
Speaker 3: Well, Victoria, your insight on this, all.

825
00:48:05,600 --> 00:48:08,080
Speaker 2: Of your knowledge on this topic. It's so helpful.

826
00:48:08,239 --> 00:48:11,000
Speaker 3: And I know that I'm certainly walking away from this

827
00:48:11,040 --> 00:48:15,760
Speaker 3: conversation with a handful of takeaways to navigate both everything

828
00:48:16,040 --> 00:48:20,680
Speaker 3: from just regular overwhelm to probably enough a little burnout

829
00:48:21,040 --> 00:48:23,760
Speaker 3: in the months to come. And I think to end here,

830
00:48:24,080 --> 00:48:26,520
Speaker 3: I just want to kind of run home something that

831
00:48:26,560 --> 00:48:30,560
Speaker 3: we touched on earlier, which is, once you kind of

832
00:48:30,640 --> 00:48:32,920
Speaker 3: deal with this, maybe for the first time, or even

833
00:48:32,960 --> 00:48:35,960
Speaker 3: if it's the eighteenth time, but you're finally starting to

834
00:48:36,360 --> 00:48:39,200
Speaker 3: utilize a skill set that really works for you, it's

835
00:48:39,200 --> 00:48:42,160
Speaker 3: important to recognize that, like you now have that skill

836
00:48:42,200 --> 00:48:43,120
Speaker 3: set totally.

837
00:48:43,600 --> 00:48:46,600
Speaker 1: Yeah. Yeah, you can do thought work to not go

838
00:48:46,760 --> 00:48:50,319
Speaker 1: into the overwhelm in the first place, right, You can

839
00:48:50,400 --> 00:48:54,040
Speaker 1: help yourself to not engage with those overwhelmed thoughts and

840
00:48:54,160 --> 00:48:57,680
Speaker 1: choose a different narrative for yourself. And as you tap

841
00:48:57,719 --> 00:49:00,520
Speaker 1: into greater self love. You get to ask yourself questions

842
00:49:00,920 --> 00:49:04,359
Speaker 1: like what do I really truly want from my life

843
00:49:05,000 --> 00:49:08,640
Speaker 1: and is it aligned with this type of work. If

844
00:49:08,640 --> 00:49:10,680
Speaker 1: you have the privilege to be asking that that kind

845
00:49:10,680 --> 00:49:13,920
Speaker 1: of a question, right, it's so important thing to do.

846
00:49:14,640 --> 00:49:19,160
Speaker 3: Totally well loved this convo. Appreciate you at Victoria. How

847
00:49:19,160 --> 00:49:21,279
Speaker 3: do the hurdlers keep up with you? How do they

848
00:49:21,280 --> 00:49:24,080
Speaker 3: follow along with you? For more of your great wisdom

849
00:49:24,160 --> 00:49:24,959
Speaker 3: on the regular give.

850
00:49:24,920 --> 00:49:27,520
Speaker 1: Us the details. Thank you. So I have a podcast

851
00:49:27,560 --> 00:49:30,680
Speaker 1: called Feminist Wellness. It comes out every Thursday on all

852
00:49:30,719 --> 00:49:33,400
Speaker 1: of the places. You can find me on the gram

853
00:49:33,480 --> 00:49:36,440
Speaker 1: at Victoria albin A Wellness I give good Gram and

854
00:49:36,480 --> 00:49:39,160
Speaker 1: if you go over to Victorielbina dot com you can

855
00:49:39,160 --> 00:49:43,640
Speaker 1: get a suite of free meditations and nervous system exercises.

856
00:49:43,680 --> 00:49:47,200
Speaker 1: So there's a grounding meditation, an orienting exercise, which is

857
00:49:47,239 --> 00:49:50,359
Speaker 1: great for folks who do not feel embodied safety when

858
00:49:50,360 --> 00:49:53,120
Speaker 1: they go inward into their bodies. We always want to

859
00:49:53,160 --> 00:49:57,760
Speaker 1: honor that. Plus meditations on boundaries in our children's also

860
00:49:57,840 --> 00:50:01,360
Speaker 1: not a word. Yeah, and so that's just at the

861
00:50:01,400 --> 00:50:03,680
Speaker 1: top of the page of Victorialbina dot com.

862
00:50:04,400 --> 00:50:05,080
Speaker 2: Love it all.

863
00:50:05,239 --> 00:50:08,880
Speaker 3: I'm over at Hurdle Podcast and at Emily Potty another

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00:50:08,920 --> 00:50:10,120
Speaker 3: hurdle conquered.

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Speaker 2: Catch you guys next time.