1 00:00:02,120 --> 00:00:07,520 Speaker 1: Welcome back to another episode about me, this COVID nineteen edition. 2 00:00:07,520 --> 00:00:12,960 Speaker 1: And I'm your host, Kevin Paul Like yes, last Kevin, Hello, 3 00:00:15,440 --> 00:00:18,119 Speaker 1: but I digress. Let's meet a shower no particular orders. 4 00:00:18,160 --> 00:00:22,680 Speaker 1: Say hey to Craig Kakowski. Kakow, how's the Christmas tree? 5 00:00:22,720 --> 00:00:27,480 Speaker 1: Look at? It's uh, it's a towering three ft tall. 6 00:00:27,880 --> 00:00:33,200 Speaker 1: Huh it's uh it's artificial. Uh No, no trees were killed? 7 00:00:33,880 --> 00:00:37,040 Speaker 1: Um and uh yeah, Carlo put it all together. I 8 00:00:37,080 --> 00:00:39,960 Speaker 1: think we put it up the first day of November, 9 00:00:40,040 --> 00:00:43,320 Speaker 1: so it's been up for a while. I feel that 10 00:00:43,479 --> 00:00:47,320 Speaker 1: wait until the day after Thanksgiving. Nice, I don't because 11 00:00:47,320 --> 00:00:51,360 Speaker 1: Thanksgiving was so late. I refused to wait till after Thanksgiving. Also, 12 00:00:51,520 --> 00:00:55,200 Speaker 1: damn it, don't rob me out of a couple of weeks. 13 00:00:56,160 --> 00:00:59,440 Speaker 1: But it sounds like at three feet not much plastic 14 00:00:59,520 --> 00:01:02,800 Speaker 1: was harmed in the process either. No, that's good too. 15 00:01:02,920 --> 00:01:06,400 Speaker 1: So yeah, the ice caps can I can stay put. 16 00:01:06,560 --> 00:01:10,800 Speaker 1: Appreciate you now. Please welcome Caroline Carter, Carter as and 17 00:01:10,880 --> 00:01:15,120 Speaker 1: Potter as in Poper. What was a favorite childhood Christmas gift? 18 00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:20,360 Speaker 1: And why? Um a gift is? Well, I'll tell you 19 00:01:20,480 --> 00:01:24,320 Speaker 1: one that wasn't so sure because I don't remember anything, 20 00:01:24,319 --> 00:01:28,600 Speaker 1: which means that maybe gifts are pointless. But one Christmas, 21 00:01:28,640 --> 00:01:32,480 Speaker 1: I accidentally squirted this like medicated face washed directly into 22 00:01:32,560 --> 00:01:38,919 Speaker 1: my eye and I like burn my cornia. Um so 23 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:42,039 Speaker 1: I was spent the whole Christmas morning like crying, and 24 00:01:42,080 --> 00:01:44,360 Speaker 1: my siblings were like, Caroline, such a fucking bit, she's 25 00:01:44,440 --> 00:01:49,640 Speaker 1: ruining Christmas for us. Um your nineteen. This happened this 26 00:01:49,720 --> 00:01:52,960 Speaker 1: year when I was I'm nineteen years old, So yeah, 27 00:01:53,080 --> 00:01:55,440 Speaker 1: you look older than thank you. Yeah, I get that 28 00:01:55,440 --> 00:01:58,960 Speaker 1: a lot. Thank you, Thank you so much. Hey, there's 29 00:01:58,960 --> 00:02:04,280 Speaker 1: Mark Gagliardi where Marcus of Gagle Artists. What was a 30 00:02:04,440 --> 00:02:09,440 Speaker 1: typical Christmas morning like in your childhood? Typical Christmas morning 31 00:02:09,600 --> 00:02:12,560 Speaker 1: when I was a kid was we would get up 32 00:02:13,480 --> 00:02:16,639 Speaker 1: at like we would set alarms to see who could 33 00:02:16,680 --> 00:02:19,440 Speaker 1: get up the earliest because we wanted to get down there. 34 00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:22,480 Speaker 1: And it was like there was one year I remember 35 00:02:22,600 --> 00:02:26,519 Speaker 1: I set the alarm for four am, and I went 36 00:02:26,560 --> 00:02:29,400 Speaker 1: downstairs at four am and just started playing with toys 37 00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:32,400 Speaker 1: and uh, and my mom came down the stairs and 38 00:02:32,440 --> 00:02:34,799 Speaker 1: just looked at me and she was like this, you've 39 00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:37,320 Speaker 1: gone too far and she and she sent me back 40 00:02:37,400 --> 00:02:40,160 Speaker 1: upstairs to just which is torture because you're sitting there 41 00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:42,760 Speaker 1: thinking about the toys that you know are down there 42 00:02:42,760 --> 00:02:46,200 Speaker 1: you've already opened at four am with no one else 43 00:02:46,240 --> 00:02:50,160 Speaker 1: around in the dark. Yea. From then on out, it 44 00:02:50,240 --> 00:02:52,120 Speaker 1: was more like, oh, maybe I should make this about 45 00:02:52,120 --> 00:02:56,320 Speaker 1: the family, unless about the presence that reminds me of 46 00:02:56,320 --> 00:02:59,480 Speaker 1: a of a Santa outing. In my childhood, we were 47 00:02:59,520 --> 00:03:02,840 Speaker 1: so reform, we were practically Catholics, and my parents couldn't 48 00:03:02,840 --> 00:03:05,120 Speaker 1: explain why we couldn't have a Christmas tree, So in 49 00:03:05,120 --> 00:03:07,880 Speaker 1: fact we did. And at four am I went down 50 00:03:07,880 --> 00:03:10,520 Speaker 1: to check to check on Santa, and there was Pops 51 00:03:11,000 --> 00:03:13,200 Speaker 1: with a Scotch and his Sanditch. Come back to your 52 00:03:15,919 --> 00:03:18,280 Speaker 1: as he's as he's wrapping up the last few gifts. 53 00:03:19,720 --> 00:03:21,720 Speaker 1: Yeah that was a was a heartbreaker for a four 54 00:03:21,720 --> 00:03:27,520 Speaker 1: and a half year old. But anyway, uh and now 55 00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:32,919 Speaker 1: it's just Alvarado time. See Masterrado, how are you at 56 00:03:32,960 --> 00:03:39,119 Speaker 1: wrapping gifts? I'm not as good as I want to be, 57 00:03:39,200 --> 00:03:42,560 Speaker 1: but damn if I don't try hard. Yeah, I really 58 00:03:42,600 --> 00:03:44,880 Speaker 1: want to make this look good and I just I 59 00:03:44,920 --> 00:03:48,200 Speaker 1: can't get it tight enough. That's right, That's the fold 60 00:03:48,240 --> 00:03:50,360 Speaker 1: is always a little a little like bubbly, and then 61 00:03:50,400 --> 00:03:51,680 Speaker 1: I put it on its side and I shut the 62 00:03:51,720 --> 00:03:53,800 Speaker 1: box down to get the tightness on the bottom. That 63 00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:55,920 Speaker 1: might work, But now I got this one up here 64 00:03:56,960 --> 00:03:59,000 Speaker 1: and it's not. And it's a bummer because I really 65 00:03:59,040 --> 00:04:01,600 Speaker 1: try so hard. I think the fine folks who make 66 00:04:01,640 --> 00:04:05,360 Speaker 1: the wrapping paper know this about us, and the papers 67 00:04:05,400 --> 00:04:07,440 Speaker 1: designed so that it will never be perfectly tough. But 68 00:04:07,520 --> 00:04:09,520 Speaker 1: let's be honest. Though you pay a little more, you 69 00:04:09,520 --> 00:04:12,680 Speaker 1: get at you get a better paper, You get a 70 00:04:12,680 --> 00:04:14,880 Speaker 1: little the little lines, it's a little thicker. It kind 71 00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:18,480 Speaker 1: of holds the crease a little more. You know, you 72 00:04:18,600 --> 00:04:24,920 Speaker 1: better watch yourself getting nuts, Get nuts, and last but 73 00:04:25,000 --> 00:04:27,000 Speaker 1: a lump of cold Stratton if you think him least, 74 00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:34,320 Speaker 1: it's Joey Greer peppermint patty breath. How did you do that? Again? Uh, honestly, 75 00:04:34,360 --> 00:04:39,599 Speaker 1: it was a it was a cosmetic surgery, so it 76 00:04:39,720 --> 00:04:42,039 Speaker 1: wasn't And I did it myself and it's really simple 77 00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:43,760 Speaker 1: and anyone can do it at home. You get a 78 00:04:43,800 --> 00:04:45,720 Speaker 1: whole bunch of peppermint sticks, you melt them down, and 79 00:04:45,760 --> 00:04:48,839 Speaker 1: you're gonna want to get to two to six dozen 80 00:04:48,920 --> 00:04:50,839 Speaker 1: syringes because you're gonna want you're gonna need to like 81 00:04:50,880 --> 00:04:53,640 Speaker 1: inject it like several times over the course of as 82 00:04:53,680 --> 00:04:57,440 Speaker 1: many days as it takes too and six dozen, Yeah, 83 00:04:57,560 --> 00:05:01,080 Speaker 1: and uh, it's it's it's not as bad as it sounds. 84 00:05:01,160 --> 00:05:03,240 Speaker 1: You're gonna have to inject into the really soft tissue 85 00:05:03,240 --> 00:05:05,680 Speaker 1: in the back of your throat and then you're you're 86 00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:07,320 Speaker 1: just gonna have to just keep pumping it in there, 87 00:05:07,400 --> 00:05:09,360 Speaker 1: keep pumping it in there. And this is what got me. 88 00:05:09,400 --> 00:05:11,680 Speaker 1: You're gonna think it's plus that's for me. It's not. 89 00:05:11,920 --> 00:05:16,000 Speaker 1: It's not that's for us. Exactly. There's nothing infected. And 90 00:05:16,520 --> 00:05:19,640 Speaker 1: you might have trouble swallowing, you might have trouble breathing thinking, 91 00:05:20,400 --> 00:05:22,279 Speaker 1: but don't worry that. All that stuff just kind of 92 00:05:22,279 --> 00:05:24,880 Speaker 1: goes out the window once like that sweet sweet peppermint 93 00:05:24,920 --> 00:05:34,400 Speaker 1: flavor is just it's kind enough to do the math 94 00:05:34,480 --> 00:05:38,240 Speaker 1: for in the chat space. All of our scene suggestions 95 00:05:38,240 --> 00:05:41,880 Speaker 1: are gathered from your listener emails or from our lovely 96 00:05:41,920 --> 00:05:44,320 Speaker 1: Patreon v I p s. To become a patron support 97 00:05:44,360 --> 00:05:47,320 Speaker 1: of the show and enjoy exclusive content like video of 98 00:05:47,360 --> 00:05:49,320 Speaker 1: what's happening right the fun now, just head on over 99 00:05:49,360 --> 00:05:53,599 Speaker 1: to patreon dot com slash, speaking of which there is 100 00:05:53,680 --> 00:05:59,320 Speaker 1: now a podcast called Alchemy that it's not just on Reddit. 101 00:06:00,080 --> 00:06:02,719 Speaker 1: Yeah it's not. It's no longer unread it anymore, or 102 00:06:02,800 --> 00:06:06,000 Speaker 1: just it's full blown z's. I listened to the first episode, 103 00:06:06,040 --> 00:06:10,000 Speaker 1: and I gotta be honest, it was helpful. It was helpful, 104 00:06:12,560 --> 00:06:15,440 Speaker 1: good night. I didn't know certain things about myself that 105 00:06:15,480 --> 00:06:19,279 Speaker 1: I now know, and I would recommend that for each 106 00:06:19,320 --> 00:06:23,520 Speaker 1: and every damn one of you. Uh yeah, and also 107 00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:27,640 Speaker 1: I think it's comprised of just alcamaniacs. So there's literally 108 00:06:27,720 --> 00:06:29,640 Speaker 1: nothing we can do to shut it down. So let's 109 00:06:29,680 --> 00:06:34,560 Speaker 1: make it a positive thing. Uh. If you'd like to 110 00:06:34,680 --> 00:06:37,719 Speaker 1: have bit of scene via old time email, please write 111 00:06:37,720 --> 00:06:40,120 Speaker 1: to the podcast at your name here at alchemyst dot com. 112 00:06:40,200 --> 00:06:48,120 Speaker 1: That's your name here at It's weird Seen. One comes 113 00:06:48,120 --> 00:06:50,919 Speaker 1: from Luca, who wrote, and yes this was pulled for 114 00:06:51,040 --> 00:06:55,640 Speaker 1: today's cast. Joey and Caroline play a couple of genies 115 00:06:56,040 --> 00:07:02,520 Speaker 1: playing a complicated and elaborate game of scissors paper rock. Yeah. 116 00:07:02,560 --> 00:07:10,840 Speaker 1: I don't think that's what's how it's described, thank Luca. Alright, alright, okay, 117 00:07:10,880 --> 00:07:14,360 Speaker 1: now listen, is that you? Is that you whispies? Is 118 00:07:14,360 --> 00:07:18,160 Speaker 1: that it's my whispies? Get them off of me? All right, 119 00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:22,640 Speaker 1: they have. You know that, my whispies have their own 120 00:07:22,720 --> 00:07:26,280 Speaker 1: brain and they can do whatever they want. You have 121 00:07:26,400 --> 00:07:28,960 Speaker 1: some of the weirdest wishes I've ever seen in my love. 122 00:07:29,000 --> 00:07:31,800 Speaker 1: They wished for that. That's your whispies. They're whispies. They're 123 00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:35,640 Speaker 1: not wishies. I think you're I'm saying you're wishy people 124 00:07:35,640 --> 00:07:40,560 Speaker 1: that wishes for. I know what they're called, the wishes. 125 00:07:40,760 --> 00:07:46,320 Speaker 1: I call them wishes. Understand what you're not understanding what 126 00:07:46,360 --> 00:07:49,720 Speaker 1: I'm saying. I'm saying that the people you granted wishes 127 00:07:49,800 --> 00:07:53,200 Speaker 1: for are really weird. You've got a weird energy about you, 128 00:07:53,560 --> 00:07:55,480 Speaker 1: and you just attract these people who just like make 129 00:07:55,560 --> 00:07:58,360 Speaker 1: these really weird wishes. I can't. I am a genie 130 00:07:58,400 --> 00:08:01,200 Speaker 1: that is in a toilet. Okay, So the kind of 131 00:08:01,680 --> 00:08:04,559 Speaker 1: that find me, yeah, but I'm in the top tank. 132 00:08:04,880 --> 00:08:06,679 Speaker 1: You're in the bottom tank. So the kind of people 133 00:08:06,680 --> 00:08:08,880 Speaker 1: that find me are people who are exclusively trying to 134 00:08:08,880 --> 00:08:14,480 Speaker 1: do double deckers. A protector. They're just trying to look 135 00:08:14,600 --> 00:08:17,000 Speaker 1: they're pooping in both of us, all right, they're pooping 136 00:08:17,040 --> 00:08:21,080 Speaker 1: in both of our little cages here, all right, Yeah, yeah, 137 00:08:21,080 --> 00:08:24,160 Speaker 1: I'll be right out. I'm just saying they're a lines 138 00:08:24,200 --> 00:08:29,200 Speaker 1: forming out here. I can buddy every other it's the 139 00:08:29,240 --> 00:08:34,680 Speaker 1: only would just die. Look, man, we know it's the 140 00:08:34,679 --> 00:08:37,000 Speaker 1: only stall. Okay, can you just can you just relax? 141 00:08:37,040 --> 00:08:40,199 Speaker 1: Do you? I just really sorry? Can you get six 142 00:08:40,240 --> 00:08:42,800 Speaker 1: ft away from me? Please? I'm just I'm standing here 143 00:08:42,840 --> 00:08:44,280 Speaker 1: in this line. I'm standing here in this line. I'm 144 00:08:44,280 --> 00:08:46,240 Speaker 1: waiting to get into this bathroom. He's been in there 145 00:08:46,240 --> 00:08:48,400 Speaker 1: for god knows how long. Well, I don't even know 146 00:08:48,400 --> 00:08:59,839 Speaker 1: what's going on in this toilets behind just die shot. 147 00:09:00,000 --> 00:09:07,880 Speaker 1: Oh my god, I went through. But are you in 148 00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:11,400 Speaker 1: the stall? What's happening? Damn a Genie? And I don't 149 00:09:11,640 --> 00:09:16,880 Speaker 1: tell you something else that my coworker accidentally shot up 150 00:09:16,880 --> 00:09:22,160 Speaker 1: your asshole, so he's possessing your rectum. Fine, I have 151 00:09:22,160 --> 00:09:25,000 Speaker 1: a question for you, But I have a real quick question. 152 00:09:25,559 --> 00:09:28,800 Speaker 1: Are you affecting a voice right now? Or do you 153 00:09:28,800 --> 00:09:33,320 Speaker 1: know this is what I think, Genie sound like? Does 154 00:09:33,360 --> 00:09:37,640 Speaker 1: it sound like I'm doing a voice. I'm just saying 155 00:09:37,640 --> 00:09:39,880 Speaker 1: you don't have to try that hard. You appeared in 156 00:09:39,960 --> 00:09:44,480 Speaker 1: this bathroom stall, and that's I'm just I have childhood traumas. 157 00:09:44,520 --> 00:09:46,880 Speaker 1: People didn't believe me. Okay, follow up on the dude 158 00:09:46,880 --> 00:09:51,160 Speaker 1: of my ass what's happening now? So my coworker I 159 00:09:51,200 --> 00:09:57,000 Speaker 1: have two genies. Yes, my coworker, Gene is the bottom 160 00:09:57,080 --> 00:10:01,200 Speaker 1: tank genie and he shot. You must have an extra 161 00:10:01,320 --> 00:10:03,920 Speaker 1: large butthole because he shot right up there when he 162 00:10:03,960 --> 00:10:05,880 Speaker 1: was supposed to just come out of the stall. And 163 00:10:05,920 --> 00:10:07,720 Speaker 1: we're going to do a whole thing to ask kind 164 00:10:07,720 --> 00:10:13,319 Speaker 1: of who you want to have Granger wish genies into 165 00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:18,160 Speaker 1: my office? No, oh, my gosh, some of it is 166 00:10:18,160 --> 00:10:23,320 Speaker 1: still in my hair. Do you know why you're here today? 167 00:10:23,720 --> 00:10:26,120 Speaker 1: Probably probably did something wrong, But can you tell this 168 00:10:26,280 --> 00:10:28,480 Speaker 1: genes take a shower or something first? I don't know 169 00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:36,679 Speaker 1: way and probably did something wrong, is right? Boober? Boober boner? 170 00:10:38,200 --> 00:10:41,679 Speaker 1: You two are not doing a great job being genies. Now. 171 00:10:41,679 --> 00:10:44,560 Speaker 1: I don't have to tell you that, do I wasn't 172 00:10:44,559 --> 00:10:48,840 Speaker 1: the toilet. What do you expect My dad was from 173 00:10:48,880 --> 00:10:52,320 Speaker 1: that lamp that they found. Indeed, to mention your father, 174 00:10:52,679 --> 00:10:56,600 Speaker 1: your father was the greatest genie, and then you came along, 175 00:10:56,720 --> 00:11:02,000 Speaker 1: Boober and ruined his name. I didn't. I have a 176 00:11:02,120 --> 00:11:06,920 Speaker 1: very special assignment for one of you. I'll do it. 177 00:11:07,559 --> 00:11:10,120 Speaker 1: There's no, it's not okay, that's not how that works. 178 00:11:11,160 --> 00:11:13,280 Speaker 1: You have to wait till he finished, asked the question, 179 00:11:13,320 --> 00:11:16,960 Speaker 1: then you can buzzn't thank you? Now, there was a 180 00:11:17,040 --> 00:11:21,760 Speaker 1: very there's a nu lamp. Well it's an old lamp. Okay, 181 00:11:21,880 --> 00:11:24,080 Speaker 1: so he said, I thought you said new the lamp, 182 00:11:24,840 --> 00:11:30,280 Speaker 1: and I got what I don't Please let me finish. 183 00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:34,640 Speaker 1: There was there's a lamp, a very famous lamp. Okay, 184 00:11:34,679 --> 00:11:40,360 Speaker 1: I haven't finished. I haven't finished. But the genie inside 185 00:11:40,679 --> 00:11:46,480 Speaker 1: has expired. You know how it goes if? Yes, so 186 00:11:46,559 --> 00:11:51,800 Speaker 1: I have the I have did you just hear it her? Okay? No, 187 00:11:52,080 --> 00:11:54,400 Speaker 1: you know how it goes. If nobody rubs the lamp 188 00:11:54,440 --> 00:11:58,280 Speaker 1: for two years, the genie inside dies. So there's a 189 00:11:58,360 --> 00:12:01,679 Speaker 1: basic one of you is a leap the toilets. I 190 00:12:02,040 --> 00:12:05,000 Speaker 1: know that. I did not know that that has come 191 00:12:05,040 --> 00:12:07,000 Speaker 1: up for us because people use the toilet and the 192 00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:09,880 Speaker 1: red lobster all the time. So when did you will 193 00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:18,480 Speaker 1: be promoted? Year? On day three d sixty four, I've 194 00:12:18,480 --> 00:12:21,520 Speaker 1: got one day left. Where is this lamp? I don't 195 00:12:21,520 --> 00:12:24,640 Speaker 1: know where it is? Clearly this is They told me 196 00:12:24,679 --> 00:12:28,080 Speaker 1: this would happen. And look, I just want to tell 197 00:12:28,440 --> 00:12:31,760 Speaker 1: all my genie family how much I love them. Oh, 198 00:12:31,840 --> 00:12:34,319 Speaker 1: why won't somebody rub my lamp? And look at that lamp. 199 00:12:35,679 --> 00:12:38,640 Speaker 1: Wake at this one. Hear a voice, she got lamp 200 00:12:38,679 --> 00:12:43,920 Speaker 1: over there, it's beautiful. I hear a voice. Too many lamps. 201 00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:47,800 Speaker 1: I don't. I'm inside. I'm inside. Please rub it, honey, 202 00:12:47,840 --> 00:12:50,200 Speaker 1: grabbed that lamp. Put it in the cart. Maybe we'll 203 00:12:50,360 --> 00:12:56,480 Speaker 1: maybe we'll take it in these tongs. Why do you 204 00:12:56,600 --> 00:12:58,520 Speaker 1: don't touch on the tongs? Touch it with your hands, 205 00:12:58,520 --> 00:13:02,280 Speaker 1: with your human hands. Another lamp over here? Can you 206 00:13:02,320 --> 00:13:07,760 Speaker 1: hear me? I can graduate three wishes. Why are you 207 00:13:07,760 --> 00:13:13,520 Speaker 1: calling it a lamp. There's no light bulb. Listen right, 208 00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:19,240 Speaker 1: Arabian lamp. You're fucking idiots. Just rub it, touch it 209 00:13:19,640 --> 00:13:23,440 Speaker 1: with you. Maybe our son is right, so one of 210 00:13:23,480 --> 00:13:27,560 Speaker 1: you tube will be inhabiting this lamp. The good wait, 211 00:13:27,600 --> 00:13:32,200 Speaker 1: I haven't finished the good No, it's not how that works. 212 00:13:32,360 --> 00:13:34,880 Speaker 1: The good news is it has been moved to a location. 213 00:13:34,920 --> 00:13:39,120 Speaker 1: It is now in a home goods. So that's that's 214 00:13:39,120 --> 00:13:42,320 Speaker 1: positive for both of you, or one of you. I 215 00:13:42,360 --> 00:13:44,520 Speaker 1: don't know. I kind of got used to the toilet, 216 00:13:46,000 --> 00:13:51,040 Speaker 1: all right. So what you're telling me is you would 217 00:13:51,040 --> 00:13:53,800 Speaker 1: just mind in your own business in this bathroom stall. 218 00:13:54,400 --> 00:13:56,960 Speaker 1: What I'm telling it, and this dead body sitting out 219 00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:59,520 Speaker 1: here in front of the stall is only there and 220 00:13:59,600 --> 00:14:03,400 Speaker 1: dead because you wished that it would die and a 221 00:14:03,520 --> 00:14:05,800 Speaker 1: genie showed up and killed this guy. Is that what 222 00:14:05,880 --> 00:14:08,400 Speaker 1: you're telling me here? That's how you're telling me. Look 223 00:14:08,440 --> 00:14:10,560 Speaker 1: through that look through that mirror right there that we 224 00:14:10,640 --> 00:14:13,560 Speaker 1: both know ain't a mirror, and tell those people what 225 00:14:13,720 --> 00:14:16,640 Speaker 1: you just told me. Detective. Did you find any sort 226 00:14:16,640 --> 00:14:20,760 Speaker 1: of weapon at the scene? I you know what, No, 227 00:14:20,920 --> 00:14:22,560 Speaker 1: I did not find a weapon. We've been trying to 228 00:14:22,600 --> 00:14:24,920 Speaker 1: figure that out that I can't, for the life of me, 229 00:14:25,000 --> 00:14:27,680 Speaker 1: figure out how you killed this guy right here in 230 00:14:27,720 --> 00:14:30,280 Speaker 1: the middle of a public bathroom with a whole queue 231 00:14:30,320 --> 00:14:34,440 Speaker 1: six ft apart. Do you ever just look through this 232 00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:37,480 Speaker 1: little two way mirror and think to yourself, like, man, 233 00:14:37,520 --> 00:14:41,200 Speaker 1: what if what if they can see you? You know 234 00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:46,000 Speaker 1: what I mean? I mean, if the people on the 235 00:14:46,000 --> 00:14:49,320 Speaker 1: other side of the Americans see us? Yeah? You ever 236 00:14:49,400 --> 00:14:51,880 Speaker 1: just do you ever just looked through that mirror and 237 00:14:51,920 --> 00:14:57,160 Speaker 1: just go man, what if they what if they can 238 00:14:57,200 --> 00:15:03,440 Speaker 1: see us here? Anything? No, I think they can if 239 00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:09,680 Speaker 1: they look close enough. You can't go on the other side, 240 00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:12,160 Speaker 1: go on the other side of the mirror. There was 241 00:15:12,200 --> 00:15:17,640 Speaker 1: a guy in getting the turket right now, what you detectives, 242 00:15:16,960 --> 00:15:25,440 Speaker 1: infice in my office? What is going on? Huh huh 243 00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:32,680 Speaker 1: huh didn't We were bored, so we were having a conversation. 244 00:15:32,840 --> 00:15:37,040 Speaker 1: Nothing interesting was happening on the other side. This is 245 00:15:37,040 --> 00:15:39,560 Speaker 1: an active investigation. Woun't mean nothing interesting is going on. 246 00:15:39,680 --> 00:15:42,080 Speaker 1: We're trying to figure out who killed that person. And 247 00:15:42,120 --> 00:15:44,240 Speaker 1: you two were talking about how that the mirror is 248 00:15:44,240 --> 00:15:48,240 Speaker 1: seither or not. That's not what we are saying. That's 249 00:15:48,240 --> 00:15:51,120 Speaker 1: not what we're like. I was saying. I was saying, actually, Chief, like, 250 00:15:51,160 --> 00:15:55,760 Speaker 1: what what do they see us? Okay, your father was 251 00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:57,720 Speaker 1: a great cop. Your father was a great cop, God 252 00:15:57,760 --> 00:16:02,920 Speaker 1: rest his soul, and my dad, yeah you're dead. Oh oh, 253 00:16:03,000 --> 00:16:06,280 Speaker 1: you're saying you're not great. Well, detective, you were right 254 00:16:06,320 --> 00:16:12,880 Speaker 1: to call it a forensic proctologist. I I took a 255 00:16:12,920 --> 00:16:15,280 Speaker 1: look in there, and there's no evidence of a genie 256 00:16:15,280 --> 00:16:18,000 Speaker 1: currently in there, but the but there there was a 257 00:16:18,080 --> 00:16:21,000 Speaker 1: genie at some point, because you're telling me the genies 258 00:16:21,040 --> 00:16:24,800 Speaker 1: are real. Look, I don't know how you know. I 259 00:16:24,840 --> 00:16:26,640 Speaker 1: don't know whether it was a lower deck genie or 260 00:16:26,640 --> 00:16:29,680 Speaker 1: an upper deck genie, but a genie shot into that 261 00:16:29,760 --> 00:16:34,360 Speaker 1: guy's asshole and uh and granted him three wishes. Oh 262 00:16:34,440 --> 00:16:37,640 Speaker 1: my god, we got we we got somebody in there 263 00:16:37,640 --> 00:16:39,720 Speaker 1: sitting in a jail. Cell Ain done nothing wrong. He's 264 00:16:39,720 --> 00:16:43,520 Speaker 1: been telling the truth this whole time. We gotta we 265 00:16:43,560 --> 00:16:47,200 Speaker 1: gotta arrest that genie. How do you arrest the genie? 266 00:16:48,160 --> 00:16:50,720 Speaker 1: They were just you're just being a lab here and 267 00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:54,640 Speaker 1: just look at all the different like I guess, like 268 00:16:55,480 --> 00:16:58,800 Speaker 1: fluids and stuff, and think like where do they can 269 00:16:58,800 --> 00:17:06,280 Speaker 1: see us? And that has seen one? Oh my god, 270 00:17:06,720 --> 00:17:15,120 Speaker 1: somebody stopped him before he kills again. Two comes from 271 00:17:15,480 --> 00:17:19,440 Speaker 1: our newest patron v I P. She was newest when 272 00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:24,200 Speaker 1: this was written. Oops, and UH might need some help 273 00:17:24,200 --> 00:17:26,320 Speaker 1: on the pronunciation of the name c A L l 274 00:17:26,440 --> 00:17:32,120 Speaker 1: I O pe calliope calliopee? Sure who wrote? Hello there, 275 00:17:32,160 --> 00:17:34,879 Speaker 1: my dear alchemist. I hope I am directing this to 276 00:17:34,920 --> 00:17:37,000 Speaker 1: the right place. I have been a bit out of 277 00:17:37,000 --> 00:17:42,680 Speaker 1: the loop lately, fighting aliens and rescuing princesses and all that. Huh, 278 00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:45,159 Speaker 1: you know, all in a day's work. But today I 279 00:17:45,200 --> 00:17:47,600 Speaker 1: bring you a scene suggesting in his wedding day for 280 00:17:47,720 --> 00:17:55,639 Speaker 1: our bride, but unbeknownst to her future spouse. Uh, but wait, 281 00:17:55,880 --> 00:17:59,000 Speaker 1: what it is? Wedding day for our bride? But unbeknownst 282 00:17:59,280 --> 00:18:03,040 Speaker 1: to her, few your spouses several will be showing up 283 00:18:03,080 --> 00:18:08,959 Speaker 1: to marry her. Oh the problem none of them are 284 00:18:09,000 --> 00:18:11,600 Speaker 1: aware of each other. Yeah, well sure, sending you big 285 00:18:11,680 --> 00:18:19,760 Speaker 1: hugs in North Arizona, Love, klaile P. You look stunning. 286 00:18:20,480 --> 00:18:25,720 Speaker 1: You look I look like a fucking bitch. No, you don't. 287 00:18:25,800 --> 00:18:29,639 Speaker 1: You look so stunny, looks so good. I wish it 288 00:18:29,760 --> 00:18:34,080 Speaker 1: was my wedding day, my wedding day. I told you 289 00:18:34,440 --> 00:18:36,879 Speaker 1: my one request for my wedding is that you would 290 00:18:36,880 --> 00:18:39,119 Speaker 1: not sing. I know you're a Broadway star, you have 291 00:18:39,119 --> 00:18:42,479 Speaker 1: an amazing voice, but I just please, this is about me. 292 00:18:42,520 --> 00:18:44,440 Speaker 1: And if you start singing, everyone's gonna fall in love 293 00:18:44,480 --> 00:18:47,800 Speaker 1: with you. Of course. Okay, I'm so sorry, but it's 294 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:49,760 Speaker 1: just like it makes me every time. It's so happy. 295 00:18:50,080 --> 00:18:53,800 Speaker 1: This is such a big day. Oh my god. And Tyler, 296 00:18:53,840 --> 00:18:58,040 Speaker 1: Oh my god, what a gem, what a Jemmy Jim, 297 00:18:58,400 --> 00:19:01,119 Speaker 1: Oh my gosh. Like I was mining out and some 298 00:19:01,280 --> 00:19:04,439 Speaker 1: like North Dakota mine and I found him, and I 299 00:19:04,480 --> 00:19:07,080 Speaker 1: found this opal of Tyler. I would keep it out 300 00:19:07,080 --> 00:19:12,320 Speaker 1: and hold it. Hold that, Jim. You can't get excited. 301 00:19:13,920 --> 00:19:16,920 Speaker 1: Look there they are, my best man, my best man. 302 00:19:17,600 --> 00:19:20,160 Speaker 1: You both decided to wear Texas as well. It's kind 303 00:19:20,160 --> 00:19:24,600 Speaker 1: of weird. Yeah, Tyler, we're here, you know, we're we're here. 304 00:19:24,400 --> 00:19:27,480 Speaker 1: We're we're all the best man, Right, It's a big day, bro, 305 00:19:27,680 --> 00:19:30,600 Speaker 1: It's a big day, big day for all three of us, 306 00:19:30,960 --> 00:19:33,439 Speaker 1: for all I know. I know, this couldn't have happened better, 307 00:19:33,480 --> 00:19:37,280 Speaker 1: to be honest, in a better way, us three. I know. God, 308 00:19:37,880 --> 00:19:39,840 Speaker 1: I'm just glad. I'm just happy to say you guys. 309 00:19:40,080 --> 00:19:41,879 Speaker 1: I'm really happy you guys are here with me on 310 00:19:41,920 --> 00:19:44,919 Speaker 1: this day. I gotta say, it's really it's really sweetie 311 00:19:44,920 --> 00:19:47,639 Speaker 1: about to be here. And I wouldn't mean done this 312 00:19:47,680 --> 00:19:56,879 Speaker 1: without my two best buds. Yeah, the tractor. Nothing, nothing's 313 00:19:56,880 --> 00:20:00,320 Speaker 1: gonna change. You know, nothing's gonna change. Nothing's gonna change. 314 00:20:00,440 --> 00:20:02,640 Speaker 1: We're gonna stay the same dudes we always were. Even 315 00:20:02,720 --> 00:20:05,119 Speaker 1: if you know, I've got a little bit of you know, 316 00:20:05,240 --> 00:20:06,920 Speaker 1: I've got other things on my mind now, but I 317 00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:08,679 Speaker 1: always got you two guys on my mind. Just we're 318 00:20:08,720 --> 00:20:12,920 Speaker 1: still gonna get together every Tuesday for clue. Yeah, guys, 319 00:20:13,000 --> 00:20:15,120 Speaker 1: can I just can I run just like one one 320 00:20:15,160 --> 00:20:19,480 Speaker 1: line of my vows by you real quick? Yeah vow sure? 321 00:20:19,520 --> 00:20:22,879 Speaker 1: Man that that seems a little unusual, it's dramatic. What 322 00:20:22,920 --> 00:20:24,720 Speaker 1: do you mean, what what's unusual about that? Hi? I 323 00:20:24,720 --> 00:20:29,879 Speaker 1: am so sorry to interrupt the groom, but it seems 324 00:20:29,920 --> 00:20:32,400 Speaker 1: that the several cards are here for you. I guess 325 00:20:32,400 --> 00:20:34,760 Speaker 1: that this is justified you to choose from. We have 326 00:20:34,920 --> 00:20:42,399 Speaker 1: a Alexis limo, a Hormo limo, and they a motorcycle limo. So, uh, 327 00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:45,679 Speaker 1: I don't know which one you want to keep up, 328 00:20:46,920 --> 00:20:51,360 Speaker 1: but thank you. Is this where all the grooms are 329 00:20:51,359 --> 00:20:58,040 Speaker 1: making up? Uh? The what the grooms? I was told 330 00:20:58,080 --> 00:21:01,320 Speaker 1: this was the grooms? Helful man, Tyler? Did you guys? 331 00:21:01,359 --> 00:21:04,119 Speaker 1: Did you guys pull a prank? Is this prank? Who's 332 00:21:04,280 --> 00:21:08,040 Speaker 1: come on? Who did who did this? Who did this? 333 00:21:08,080 --> 00:21:11,359 Speaker 1: To me? Specifically? Who did this? You asking me? Who? 334 00:21:11,800 --> 00:21:15,600 Speaker 1: Who did this? Cool lasso? Look at this? This is 335 00:21:16,240 --> 00:21:19,800 Speaker 1: are those those chaps and everything? The horses? Well, I'm 336 00:21:19,840 --> 00:21:22,240 Speaker 1: here to catch my little lady and make her my own. 337 00:21:22,520 --> 00:21:26,160 Speaker 1: What about this little Italian fellow? What's his story? Don't 338 00:21:26,160 --> 00:21:29,960 Speaker 1: call him that? Well? Yeah, I mean it's we that's 339 00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:33,040 Speaker 1: he runs the car service that's gonna take us to 340 00:21:33,320 --> 00:21:44,840 Speaker 1: the church right somewhere else into the chapel where. Yeah, 341 00:21:44,880 --> 00:21:48,879 Speaker 1: that's why I'm here. That's so funny you're getting married 342 00:21:48,880 --> 00:21:51,120 Speaker 1: on the same day that that that you know this 343 00:21:51,160 --> 00:21:54,560 Speaker 1: is happening. That's yuh. Yeah. Yeah, I'm here to make 344 00:21:54,600 --> 00:21:58,200 Speaker 1: my Debbie Sue moan and I'm damn happy to be here. Wait, 345 00:21:58,720 --> 00:22:03,520 Speaker 1: Debbie Sue is my bread, Debbie is my bride. You're 346 00:22:03,520 --> 00:22:12,840 Speaker 1: not referring to Deborah Susan, are you? Is that my bride? 347 00:22:13,520 --> 00:22:20,160 Speaker 1: I'm a day thing that Debbie souper. Okay, So um, 348 00:22:20,160 --> 00:22:22,480 Speaker 1: when I go out there, I just need you to 349 00:22:22,520 --> 00:22:24,920 Speaker 1: hold my train, Okay, and then we're gonna wait. Um, 350 00:22:24,920 --> 00:22:26,760 Speaker 1: we did this is a rehearsal dinner yesterday. We had 351 00:22:26,760 --> 00:22:28,720 Speaker 1: to run it ten times. You did it wrong every time, 352 00:22:29,080 --> 00:22:33,240 Speaker 1: so this time, just please do it right. The wedding 353 00:22:33,280 --> 00:22:35,640 Speaker 1: starts in five minutes. They're just gonna just gonna show 354 00:22:35,720 --> 00:22:40,960 Speaker 1: up and yeah, that's gonna get married. The d s 355 00:22:41,040 --> 00:22:46,000 Speaker 1: there's like a whole bunch of dads are entrance away. Okay. 356 00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:48,040 Speaker 1: Can you also not follow me ds please because it 357 00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:50,080 Speaker 1: makes me sound like a gaming system and I don't 358 00:22:50,119 --> 00:22:54,560 Speaker 1: like that. Okay, Okay, plotting. I'm just so so goddamn 359 00:22:54,600 --> 00:22:59,080 Speaker 1: proud of you, Thank you, Thanks dad. This is gonna 360 00:22:59,119 --> 00:23:02,199 Speaker 1: be beautiful, so out of my little girl. Thank you, dad. 361 00:23:02,240 --> 00:23:06,840 Speaker 1: Can you go sit in the church? Yeah? Right, there 362 00:23:06,880 --> 00:23:08,879 Speaker 1: is that my little girl in there? Is that my 363 00:23:08,960 --> 00:23:11,400 Speaker 1: little girl in there? Who is this girl? Oh? I'm 364 00:23:12,400 --> 00:23:14,760 Speaker 1: I'm just I'm just so proud of my my daughter, 365 00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:19,000 Speaker 1: Debbie Sue, I just my daughters. Is Deborah Susan? Wait? 366 00:23:19,160 --> 00:23:23,199 Speaker 1: Your your Debora Susan's father? I'm yes, I'm DEBI What 367 00:23:23,280 --> 00:23:28,800 Speaker 1: a coincidence. I'm Debbie Sue's father, my little girl Maya's 368 00:23:28,840 --> 00:23:34,480 Speaker 1: step Uh is this guy? Sorry? Guys, I should have 369 00:23:34,480 --> 00:23:37,199 Speaker 1: explained this. You all are fathers to me, okay, in 370 00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:41,520 Speaker 1: different ways throughout my life. The little Italian my biological father, 371 00:23:41,880 --> 00:23:50,920 Speaker 1: my other biological father, and wait, what do do do? 372 00:23:50,920 --> 00:23:55,359 Speaker 1: Do do do? Let me get out there? He is 373 00:23:55,520 --> 00:24:00,439 Speaker 1: they're not hitting the key right. Let me get out everyone. 374 00:24:00,840 --> 00:24:05,600 Speaker 1: I'm sorry, but the piano guy needs to understand that 375 00:24:05,680 --> 00:24:09,800 Speaker 1: he has to hit the note right. Like this my 376 00:24:10,000 --> 00:24:20,440 Speaker 1: wedding day, my wedding. She's come a prize some bow. 377 00:24:21,400 --> 00:24:23,800 Speaker 1: What that's going on to me? She does not want 378 00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:27,400 Speaker 1: this kind of music. She wasn't a traditional It's something organic, 379 00:24:27,520 --> 00:24:32,960 Speaker 1: something cauliflower shoulders from Broadway. What do you guys, don't 380 00:24:33,080 --> 00:24:38,560 Speaker 1: up here on the altar. Cowboy man, have you decided 381 00:24:38,600 --> 00:24:41,480 Speaker 1: to be my best man or something? I thought I 382 00:24:41,520 --> 00:24:44,320 Speaker 1: thought you were the entertainment. That this whole cowboy thing 383 00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:50,600 Speaker 1: is real? What is happening here? I'm here? Come hold on, 384 00:24:50,720 --> 00:24:53,040 Speaker 1: we can't all be here to marry dever suit that 385 00:24:53,080 --> 00:24:57,960 Speaker 1: don't add up? That man? Why don't we ask her? Here? 386 00:24:58,040 --> 00:25:02,880 Speaker 1: She comes? Everybody? Stand up? Stand up? Oh god, I'm 387 00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:07,080 Speaker 1: so proud little girl. I love that little girl. Beautiful, 388 00:25:07,160 --> 00:25:12,200 Speaker 1: so beautiful my wedding day. Shut up. Wait, I just 389 00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:16,520 Speaker 1: need to stop the wedding for one second. Tiffany, shut up. Okay, 390 00:25:16,680 --> 00:25:19,159 Speaker 1: if you don't stop singing, which thank you already have, 391 00:25:19,640 --> 00:25:21,720 Speaker 1: but I was going to threaten you more with thank 392 00:25:21,720 --> 00:25:23,919 Speaker 1: you for stopping everyone. This is my day. It's not 393 00:25:24,040 --> 00:25:28,440 Speaker 1: about a Broadway star, okay, So it's all about you. 394 00:25:28,480 --> 00:25:35,480 Speaker 1: Don't get on the pier, thank you? Okay. Oh oh 395 00:25:35,480 --> 00:25:38,520 Speaker 1: my god, you're all here? Yeah, what what's going on? 396 00:25:38,600 --> 00:25:43,639 Speaker 1: Deb Oh my god, this is so awkward. Guys, and 397 00:25:43,760 --> 00:25:50,120 Speaker 1: to the whole wedding. I'm so sorry everybody that came here. Um, Tiffany, 398 00:25:50,800 --> 00:25:52,880 Speaker 1: if you say one more word, I'm going to cut 399 00:25:52,880 --> 00:25:58,320 Speaker 1: your head off. That's my girl. Thank you, that's my girl. 400 00:25:58,560 --> 00:26:11,879 Speaker 1: That's my girl. That crazy another homicide here, got a 401 00:26:11,880 --> 00:26:14,359 Speaker 1: woman shut off. Do you ever think they can't They 402 00:26:14,359 --> 00:26:16,119 Speaker 1: can see us through the glass. They could also hear us, 403 00:26:16,200 --> 00:26:19,920 Speaker 1: do you think that? No, I don't think that, because 404 00:26:19,960 --> 00:26:23,800 Speaker 1: they can do both. It's not a sound proof vision proof. 405 00:26:25,480 --> 00:26:27,960 Speaker 1: Go go, They're not gonna be able to hear. Okay, fine, 406 00:26:28,200 --> 00:26:29,480 Speaker 1: what do you want me to do? Scream in front 407 00:26:29,520 --> 00:26:32,040 Speaker 1: of it? No? No, that I mean they're interrogating that 408 00:26:32,080 --> 00:26:33,439 Speaker 1: bride and then you can't just go in there and 409 00:26:33,480 --> 00:26:36,280 Speaker 1: just do it right now. But excuse me, I'm the 410 00:26:36,440 --> 00:26:39,960 Speaker 1: forensic practologist. Do you think there was were there any 411 00:26:40,000 --> 00:26:43,800 Speaker 1: ass related elements to this murder? It was like just 412 00:26:43,840 --> 00:26:46,320 Speaker 1: a clean head cut off. Yeah. Also, I thought you 413 00:26:46,440 --> 00:26:51,280 Speaker 1: got I thought you were on leave, unpaid leave, because 414 00:26:51,280 --> 00:26:56,200 Speaker 1: you said everything was asked related. Yeah, I am ah. 415 00:26:58,880 --> 00:27:00,879 Speaker 1: Just when I think I'm out, pulled me back in. 416 00:27:02,320 --> 00:27:03,840 Speaker 1: What do you do on paid leave? Do you just 417 00:27:04,400 --> 00:27:07,520 Speaker 1: put the movies? Or you know? I just got a 418 00:27:07,520 --> 00:27:09,600 Speaker 1: big wall of crazy and I just try to solve 419 00:27:10,040 --> 00:27:12,840 Speaker 1: unsolved asked crimes. Now what does that mean when you 420 00:27:12,880 --> 00:27:15,480 Speaker 1: say big wall of crazy? Because I have something specific 421 00:27:15,520 --> 00:27:17,160 Speaker 1: in my head, but that I've never heard it quite 422 00:27:17,200 --> 00:27:19,720 Speaker 1: like that before. There's a lot of strings connected to 423 00:27:19,720 --> 00:27:23,040 Speaker 1: other strings, you know. I think there's a guy out 424 00:27:23,080 --> 00:27:26,480 Speaker 1: there and he's related to every ass crime that's gone 425 00:27:26,520 --> 00:27:35,200 Speaker 1: unsolved over the last fifty years. Anyway, so the hey fellas, um, 426 00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:40,080 Speaker 1: obviously Debbie might be doing some real time. Yeah, yeah, 427 00:27:40,320 --> 00:27:44,520 Speaker 1: I was thinking we break out? What you were thinking? 428 00:27:44,520 --> 00:27:48,720 Speaker 1: We break her out? No? I wasn't this Cowboys growing 429 00:27:48,800 --> 00:27:53,680 Speaker 1: on me. I can back up and we could exactly 430 00:27:53,760 --> 00:28:00,000 Speaker 1: exactly I'd like to make an accusation. Oh yeah, sorry 431 00:28:00,200 --> 00:28:07,359 Speaker 1: Mustard in the conservatory with lead Putt. That's incorrect. Fuck. Anyway, 432 00:28:08,119 --> 00:28:10,000 Speaker 1: it's pretty cool that we all got to use the 433 00:28:10,160 --> 00:28:14,879 Speaker 1: honey sweet, you know, it's it's fun. What are you 434 00:28:14,880 --> 00:28:17,119 Speaker 1: still doing here? By the way, I mean, I was 435 00:28:17,200 --> 00:28:18,760 Speaker 1: dating her, and I feel like I have someone with 436 00:28:18,880 --> 00:28:23,080 Speaker 1: that mbile. Yeah, I don't feel like I've really grown 437 00:28:23,119 --> 00:28:25,480 Speaker 1: close to you two guys, and you guys should join 438 00:28:25,560 --> 00:28:29,440 Speaker 1: us in the shrife hecta wait, whoa, but then it'll 439 00:28:29,760 --> 00:28:38,280 Speaker 1: it'll be a quite sink. Quintet quint facta, quintet quint factor. Man, 440 00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:41,760 Speaker 1: I mean, hey, guys, guys, guys. Um, I did order 441 00:28:41,880 --> 00:28:45,240 Speaker 1: us a little treat keep up. You might know her 442 00:28:45,280 --> 00:28:52,840 Speaker 1: from Broadway Fame ladies. Oh my hello, oh my god? 443 00:28:53,840 --> 00:29:08,800 Speaker 1: What that short term memories of motherfucker, isn't it? See 444 00:29:08,840 --> 00:29:11,600 Speaker 1: three comes a Chance, who wrote, Hey, y'all, even though 445 00:29:11,640 --> 00:29:15,200 Speaker 1: I stopped being a Patreon doesn't mean I broke up 446 00:29:15,240 --> 00:29:18,600 Speaker 1: with you all anyway. My scene suggestion is this. The 447 00:29:18,680 --> 00:29:31,760 Speaker 1: blob falls out of space and attacks a gym. Somebody 448 00:29:31,960 --> 00:29:38,400 Speaker 1: texting these immediately. This just came in. The guy who's 449 00:29:38,440 --> 00:29:40,760 Speaker 1: cleaning the pool drop this note under the door, and 450 00:29:40,800 --> 00:29:46,160 Speaker 1: I thought I'd read it big fan. It really is 451 00:29:46,200 --> 00:29:53,120 Speaker 1: all being reviewed as well. That's what this is. Um. 452 00:29:53,160 --> 00:29:55,760 Speaker 1: Oh wait, we're gonna feel great. My daughter, she's six, 453 00:29:55,800 --> 00:29:59,760 Speaker 1: helped me with the uh with the location. Thanks for 454 00:29:59,800 --> 00:30:04,280 Speaker 1: all laughs. Chance, Oh great, We just that's that's craft, 455 00:30:04,320 --> 00:30:11,680 Speaker 1: all of our six year olds dreams. What two? Dude? Four? Hey, son, 456 00:30:11,800 --> 00:30:14,520 Speaker 1: I told you the gym is closed. Hey, it's three 457 00:30:14,560 --> 00:30:16,600 Speaker 1: in the morning. You've been in there for nine hours. 458 00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:20,400 Speaker 1: Go home to your family. Family my asps. The Jim 459 00:30:20,600 --> 00:30:23,840 Speaker 1: is my family. No, your family is your family. Bryce. 460 00:30:24,360 --> 00:30:27,600 Speaker 1: I know your family. They're good people and they miss you. 461 00:30:28,800 --> 00:30:34,240 Speaker 1: Why don't miss them, Bryce, Bryce, you can cry at 462 00:30:34,240 --> 00:30:37,680 Speaker 1: the gym. I don't. I don't cry sweat out of 463 00:30:37,720 --> 00:30:43,800 Speaker 1: my eye. Bryce. We all know, we know what your 464 00:30:43,840 --> 00:30:46,080 Speaker 1: family has been through. We know what you've been through. 465 00:30:47,880 --> 00:30:53,840 Speaker 1: Put the damn dumbbells down, dumbbell why because big No, 466 00:30:54,080 --> 00:30:57,560 Speaker 1: I'm quite small. In fact, I'm the smallest person ever 467 00:30:57,560 --> 00:31:00,560 Speaker 1: to walk through those doors, those tiny wars next to 468 00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:02,800 Speaker 1: the full size doors that they made just for me. 469 00:31:03,200 --> 00:31:07,480 Speaker 1: Thanks for reminding me. But you know what, Bryce, I 470 00:31:07,560 --> 00:31:10,160 Speaker 1: got a big heart, and I think hidden somewhere underneath 471 00:31:10,200 --> 00:31:12,600 Speaker 1: all that muscle, you got a big heart too, and 472 00:31:12,680 --> 00:31:15,560 Speaker 1: your family misses that big heart. So why don't you 473 00:31:15,600 --> 00:31:18,600 Speaker 1: get back home to him, read the story of the 474 00:31:18,680 --> 00:31:21,240 Speaker 1: prodigal son in the Bible, and then head back home 475 00:31:21,280 --> 00:31:25,320 Speaker 1: to your family. Stop preaching, relisten at the gym, all right, 476 00:31:26,000 --> 00:31:30,040 Speaker 1: you're not preaching anything. I'm just over here mopping. Why 477 00:31:30,120 --> 00:31:32,520 Speaker 1: I'm the one with this giant mop in my height, 478 00:31:32,560 --> 00:31:46,840 Speaker 1: I'll have no idea all the fuck? Brice, Brice, what 479 00:31:47,040 --> 00:31:50,920 Speaker 1: is this on me? Oh my god, price was landed 480 00:31:51,000 --> 00:31:56,560 Speaker 1: on me? Oh my god, no Price. It's eating me slowly? 481 00:31:57,240 --> 00:32:06,680 Speaker 1: Oh god? Oh what the your family? You sick snut 482 00:32:07,040 --> 00:32:15,640 Speaker 1: I'm gonna kick your ash. Well, that's where that the 483 00:32:15,680 --> 00:32:17,720 Speaker 1: doors locked. At six am, I have a hot box 484 00:32:17,840 --> 00:32:22,240 Speaker 1: yoga class with Curtis. I'm in the same hot box class. 485 00:32:22,360 --> 00:32:24,120 Speaker 1: Are you taking that hot box class? I'm taking the 486 00:32:24,120 --> 00:32:27,840 Speaker 1: hot box boxing class? Yeah, yeah, yeah. The yoga and 487 00:32:27,880 --> 00:32:31,920 Speaker 1: box thing. Curtis is amazing, isn't Curtis is so good? 488 00:32:32,280 --> 00:32:35,160 Speaker 1: Isn't it weird? Also that the doors locked and there's 489 00:32:35,200 --> 00:32:37,640 Speaker 1: just this like kind of goog coming out from under 490 00:32:37,640 --> 00:32:39,960 Speaker 1: the doors. I see that there's like a goo. Yeah, 491 00:32:40,360 --> 00:32:43,280 Speaker 1: I wonder if that's so. I guess in a lot 492 00:32:43,320 --> 00:32:46,320 Speaker 1: of ways you and I are similar, you know. I 493 00:32:46,360 --> 00:32:56,720 Speaker 1: mean I have a family that I don't see much. Right, No, 494 00:32:56,840 --> 00:33:01,880 Speaker 1: I understand what I mean. I haven't seen my family 495 00:33:01,880 --> 00:33:08,000 Speaker 1: in a while. I think I was very surprised when 496 00:33:08,000 --> 00:33:11,920 Speaker 1: I killed this uh this weightlifter hare that you were 497 00:33:11,960 --> 00:33:14,200 Speaker 1: living inside of him. I gotta I gotta be honest. 498 00:33:14,200 --> 00:33:17,320 Speaker 1: I was surprising. He's got quite a Namal Canaly, shouldn't you? 499 00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:23,000 Speaker 1: Now you get three wishes, Mr blob, anything you want, 500 00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:29,640 Speaker 1: no restricching, no pram, three leashes. I wish I wasn't 501 00:33:29,640 --> 00:33:34,520 Speaker 1: a drippy blob thing. I wish I looked like actor 502 00:33:37,120 --> 00:33:42,640 Speaker 1: Tom Cruise. I don't really know any actors. It was 503 00:33:42,680 --> 00:33:46,840 Speaker 1: good that you thought about it. So you don't want 504 00:33:46,840 --> 00:33:48,640 Speaker 1: to be drippy and blobby. You want to be in 505 00:33:48,680 --> 00:33:53,120 Speaker 1: the shape of Ton. Yeah, can we do that? Okay, 506 00:33:53,160 --> 00:33:56,920 Speaker 1: but before we send you to Earth, you are going 507 00:33:57,000 --> 00:34:00,480 Speaker 1: to have to be accustomed with Earth pop culture already, 508 00:34:00,480 --> 00:34:03,920 Speaker 1: am I already? Am? Okay, Well we'll tell us what 509 00:34:04,000 --> 00:34:06,960 Speaker 1: you know, all right? I know, um, because you're going 510 00:34:07,000 --> 00:34:09,840 Speaker 1: to have to fit in. Yeah, no, of course, um 511 00:34:09,880 --> 00:34:16,840 Speaker 1: marvelous Mrs Mary's Little Show. Okay, good? Uh there was 512 00:34:16,920 --> 00:34:22,680 Speaker 1: a an adaptation of a Laddin disney Land. All right, 513 00:34:22,800 --> 00:34:31,000 Speaker 1: that's gonna come up A lodge and diet coke coke. Okay. 514 00:34:31,640 --> 00:34:36,200 Speaker 1: I felt pretty good there. Okay, I'm gonna start you 515 00:34:36,280 --> 00:34:47,239 Speaker 1: with the Mission Impossible series. Run Nay night. I have 516 00:34:47,320 --> 00:34:50,120 Speaker 1: these little blobs over here, black, red, light green, right, 517 00:34:51,719 --> 00:34:55,359 Speaker 1: so they can fit in with childhood games? Yes? Yes? 518 00:34:55,600 --> 00:34:58,799 Speaker 1: Can I ask you one question? What what is your 519 00:34:58,840 --> 00:35:06,520 Speaker 1: favorite piece of human pop culture? Well? Properly James Joyce's ulysses? 520 00:35:08,440 --> 00:35:11,520 Speaker 1: Is that very boggular down there? Oh yes, oh yes, 521 00:35:13,600 --> 00:35:16,440 Speaker 1: we just stopped bringing him up. We're having a nice 522 00:35:16,480 --> 00:35:20,400 Speaker 1: dinner without him. I just don't understand. He's been gone 523 00:35:20,440 --> 00:35:23,080 Speaker 1: for days and none of us want to go look 524 00:35:23,160 --> 00:35:26,279 Speaker 1: for him or call the police. Are not the one 525 00:35:26,360 --> 00:35:31,799 Speaker 1: being crazy here? You are? If I'm crazy, then tell 526 00:35:31,800 --> 00:35:34,879 Speaker 1: me why all these strings touch each other? Huh? If 527 00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:39,440 Speaker 1: these strings didn't touch that? So am I passed the 528 00:35:39,560 --> 00:35:43,400 Speaker 1: salami and give me the jam? What are you talking about? 529 00:35:44,120 --> 00:35:47,799 Speaker 1: Bing bong? I'll get it. I guess I'll get it. 530 00:35:47,800 --> 00:35:51,560 Speaker 1: I'll get I'll get it. Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me, 531 00:35:51,920 --> 00:35:57,040 Speaker 1: your excuse excuse me. Jamn, here's your jam? Goddamn it? 532 00:35:57,080 --> 00:36:03,319 Speaker 1: Oh my goddamn shirt. Hi? Hi, Sorry, Hi, Sorry. Even 533 00:36:03,360 --> 00:36:08,000 Speaker 1: in mythying to Hi, Sorry, I realized I might have 534 00:36:08,040 --> 00:36:10,120 Speaker 1: come at a bad time. Now you came right at 535 00:36:10,120 --> 00:36:12,080 Speaker 1: dinner time. We also have a sign on the door 536 00:36:12,120 --> 00:36:14,520 Speaker 1: that says we're having dinner, but you're here. I opened 537 00:36:14,520 --> 00:36:16,719 Speaker 1: the door. What is it right now? I appreciate that 538 00:36:17,520 --> 00:36:20,600 Speaker 1: has hair on it. Who is this under your chair? 539 00:36:20,719 --> 00:36:23,919 Speaker 1: And you haven't vacuum the carpet because they're fucking cat sheet? 540 00:36:24,080 --> 00:36:27,040 Speaker 1: So what do you expect? I'm so sorry, so sorry, 541 00:36:27,080 --> 00:36:32,319 Speaker 1: not my cat I didn't want, sir. Can you take 542 00:36:32,400 --> 00:36:35,239 Speaker 1: three steps back? Please, I'm trying to have a conversation 543 00:36:35,280 --> 00:36:37,600 Speaker 1: with the woman. Buddy, you're on my property. What do 544 00:36:37,640 --> 00:36:40,839 Speaker 1: you mean me? Take three steps back? He's tally our 545 00:36:40,880 --> 00:36:43,160 Speaker 1: property until he's in our house because we could not 546 00:36:43,280 --> 00:36:45,359 Speaker 1: afford the land directly outside the door, so he can 547 00:36:45,360 --> 00:36:48,560 Speaker 1: stay there. If you're selling bibles, we got it. We 548 00:36:49,440 --> 00:36:53,520 Speaker 1: let me formally introduce myself. I'm Detective Rogers, and I've 549 00:36:53,560 --> 00:36:56,719 Speaker 1: got a report about your son. Oh my god, Oh 550 00:36:56,719 --> 00:36:58,360 Speaker 1: my god, you have a report about her son. Have 551 00:36:58,440 --> 00:37:00,600 Speaker 1: you seen him? He was lasting at the gym? What 552 00:37:01,360 --> 00:37:07,040 Speaker 1: your son? Bryce? Is that right? Yes? Bryce is our son? Okay, um, well, 553 00:37:07,280 --> 00:37:11,480 Speaker 1: it's not great news. It seems he's been in I'm sorry, 554 00:37:11,480 --> 00:37:13,279 Speaker 1: do you mind? If it's not great news? Can you 555 00:37:13,360 --> 00:37:18,160 Speaker 1: sing it? Sure? I agree? Make it this? Yeah, it'll 556 00:37:18,160 --> 00:37:21,440 Speaker 1: make the pill go down and smoother. You will always 557 00:37:21,480 --> 00:37:25,680 Speaker 1: bring up pills. You I'm addicted. I'm addicted to pills. 558 00:37:25,920 --> 00:37:28,960 Speaker 1: Why dont you think I bring up pills on the brain. 559 00:37:29,120 --> 00:37:31,520 Speaker 1: You can take two steps back and then I'll in 560 00:37:31,640 --> 00:37:36,040 Speaker 1: my house. I'll commence, I'll commenced the singing. I just 561 00:37:36,120 --> 00:37:39,279 Speaker 1: need you to take two steps back, please, all right? 562 00:37:39,520 --> 00:37:49,760 Speaker 1: Thank you? Bryce was enveloped by big old freaking glow 563 00:37:49,920 --> 00:37:54,880 Speaker 1: bush stuff for matters space. We believe it came through 564 00:37:54,960 --> 00:37:59,520 Speaker 1: the roof of the gym back. I'm so sorry when 565 00:37:59,560 --> 00:38:01,239 Speaker 1: you said you to sing it, I thought it would 566 00:38:01,239 --> 00:38:03,920 Speaker 1: be to a recognizable tune or something like that. But 567 00:38:03,960 --> 00:38:07,120 Speaker 1: when you yeah, when you made it up, it made 568 00:38:07,160 --> 00:38:09,960 Speaker 1: him more confusing. But did I hear this right? Or 569 00:38:10,080 --> 00:38:12,080 Speaker 1: was just your singing so bad that I heard that 570 00:38:12,120 --> 00:38:17,319 Speaker 1: Bryce was swallowed by h a blob from space. Well, 571 00:38:19,160 --> 00:38:21,680 Speaker 1: I believe he used the word enveloped, because we're not 572 00:38:21,719 --> 00:38:25,839 Speaker 1: sure he wasn't fact consumed, but he is covered in 573 00:38:25,880 --> 00:38:30,240 Speaker 1: there somewhere. Any who, I've got six of the best 574 00:38:30,239 --> 00:38:34,400 Speaker 1: man and women chasing down this blob at present. You 575 00:38:34,400 --> 00:38:36,120 Speaker 1: don't have to patronize me, sir. You don't have to 576 00:38:36,120 --> 00:38:38,040 Speaker 1: patriotize me. I don't care if women are serving on 577 00:38:38,080 --> 00:38:42,160 Speaker 1: the police force. Okay, you don't just specify the people, 578 00:38:42,600 --> 00:38:45,040 Speaker 1: just whoever is the best to whoever is the best 579 00:38:45,600 --> 00:38:48,240 Speaker 1: of them, one of them is actually trans I didn't 580 00:38:48,239 --> 00:38:52,239 Speaker 1: even mention that who cares? Who cares? We don't care, 581 00:38:53,000 --> 00:38:56,919 Speaker 1: promise you they care. So you're saying that the group 582 00:38:56,960 --> 00:39:00,719 Speaker 1: from the blob went into every orifice every us bright 583 00:39:00,800 --> 00:39:04,439 Speaker 1: so you're gonna need me on this case. Uh look 584 00:39:05,920 --> 00:39:08,640 Speaker 1: all right, you know what we you got us there, 585 00:39:08,680 --> 00:39:10,880 Speaker 1: you can go and find it. He's he's on the 586 00:39:10,880 --> 00:39:12,799 Speaker 1: slave just on the other side of that dog. Go on, 587 00:39:13,480 --> 00:39:16,359 Speaker 1: do what you gotta do. But I gotta warn you this. 588 00:39:16,680 --> 00:39:18,920 Speaker 1: Once a thing has been enveloped by a blob and 589 00:39:18,960 --> 00:39:23,280 Speaker 1: then sput out like that, it's uh, it's pretty gruesome 590 00:39:23,320 --> 00:39:25,680 Speaker 1: in there. Look, I've seen a lot. I'm an fp 591 00:39:26,800 --> 00:39:30,560 Speaker 1: uh the uh I have. I have a theory that 592 00:39:30,640 --> 00:39:33,160 Speaker 1: the guy who's been committing all these ass related crimes 593 00:39:33,160 --> 00:39:35,759 Speaker 1: the past fifty years is from space. Damnit, jim Is 594 00:39:35,800 --> 00:39:38,600 Speaker 1: this your Is this your string thing? Again? Yes? Yes, 595 00:39:38,680 --> 00:39:41,360 Speaker 1: it's all connected. You've been saying it's all connected for 596 00:39:41,440 --> 00:39:44,680 Speaker 1: twenty years almost. Now, come on, just go in there, 597 00:39:44,880 --> 00:39:49,320 Speaker 1: get your goo in his ass and get out. Okay, 598 00:39:50,760 --> 00:39:54,280 Speaker 1: Hi there, Um, this is a nice Starbucks. I'm Tom Cruise. 599 00:39:54,320 --> 00:39:59,840 Speaker 1: Can I have one hot coffee? Please? Holy shit, Holy ship, 600 00:40:00,040 --> 00:40:07,879 Speaker 1: it's oh my gosh, Tom, Holy ship, Oly ship. Am 601 00:40:07,880 --> 00:40:15,200 Speaker 1: I not doing this right? Okay? I'm sorry, Jimmy, get 602 00:40:15,239 --> 00:40:17,520 Speaker 1: up from behind the counter. We've had this conversation before. 603 00:40:17,719 --> 00:40:21,440 Speaker 1: You don't work here, sir. How can I help you. Hi, 604 00:40:21,640 --> 00:40:24,680 Speaker 1: I'm Tom Cruise. I would like a hot coffee? Yeah, 605 00:40:24,680 --> 00:40:27,080 Speaker 1: I thought I recognized you. What kind of coffee would 606 00:40:27,080 --> 00:40:31,359 Speaker 1: you like? Mr? Cruise? Hots? Please? All right, we've got 607 00:40:31,800 --> 00:40:36,320 Speaker 1: let's see what we've got, Sumatra, Christmas Blend and Pikes 608 00:40:37,760 --> 00:40:41,120 Speaker 1: TMZ breaking news. We have video foot is showing Tom 609 00:40:41,120 --> 00:40:45,480 Speaker 1: Cruise inside of Starbucks in Manhattan with no bones. It 610 00:40:45,520 --> 00:40:49,400 Speaker 1: looks like Tommy Cruizy has gotten all blobby. I wonder 611 00:40:49,440 --> 00:40:51,040 Speaker 1: how this is going to affect film me A mission 612 00:40:51,040 --> 00:40:54,520 Speaker 1: impossible twelve. Yeah, what's going on? He looks like it 613 00:40:54,600 --> 00:40:58,880 Speaker 1: looks like he's about four hundred pounds. Yeah, I agree, 614 00:40:58,960 --> 00:41:01,120 Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I agree you guys. I was just working 615 00:41:01,120 --> 00:41:06,279 Speaker 1: over there. What the heck? What a free I hope 616 00:41:06,280 --> 00:41:10,720 Speaker 1: they're following COVID protocols in that Starbucks, right, I hope. 617 00:41:10,800 --> 00:41:16,040 Speaker 1: I hope. In other news, UM, let's see we're not 618 00:41:16,080 --> 00:41:20,640 Speaker 1: just we're not riffing. We're not riffing, Captain. It's not 619 00:41:20,719 --> 00:41:24,520 Speaker 1: going as well as I thought. We're not doing reference 620 00:41:24,800 --> 00:41:30,360 Speaker 1: l No, No, I didn't, I didn't. People are making 621 00:41:30,400 --> 00:41:34,960 Speaker 1: fun of me. Physically. You moved, you're out. It was 622 00:41:35,000 --> 00:41:38,799 Speaker 1: red light and he moved, going keep the game going 623 00:41:39,280 --> 00:41:47,520 Speaker 1: fuck you. I do you realize humans were so mean? Well, 624 00:41:47,560 --> 00:41:51,920 Speaker 1: they are, but they could also be very kind. Every 625 00:41:51,920 --> 00:41:55,399 Speaker 1: emotion known in the universe is on that planet, That's 626 00:41:55,400 --> 00:41:58,720 Speaker 1: what you keep saying. And if you were more familiar 627 00:41:58,760 --> 00:42:03,279 Speaker 1: with the forage of culture, you'd see that. Mm hmm. 628 00:42:05,000 --> 00:42:09,279 Speaker 1: I'm just here for one mission to find love. Do 629 00:42:09,320 --> 00:42:14,160 Speaker 1: you ever think that these strings here actually actually connect 630 00:42:14,200 --> 00:42:19,920 Speaker 1: to something? Maybe they're actually maybe the actually do say something? Well, 631 00:42:20,239 --> 00:42:23,080 Speaker 1: I think if they connected, it would we would be 632 00:42:23,080 --> 00:42:25,200 Speaker 1: able to read the words like they would make letters. 633 00:42:26,440 --> 00:42:32,600 Speaker 1: What if the strings like actually connected and said something, 634 00:42:32,600 --> 00:42:34,680 Speaker 1: wouldn't we be able to read it? Or wouldn't it 635 00:42:34,680 --> 00:42:43,279 Speaker 1: just make sense? What the hell is that sounds like that? 636 00:42:43,440 --> 00:42:46,360 Speaker 1: It sounds like a cat in a bag or something 637 00:42:47,000 --> 00:42:52,920 Speaker 1: m hmm, or like problems? You know? So these these strings, 638 00:42:53,000 --> 00:42:55,120 Speaker 1: you know that they're just they're just like really they're 639 00:42:55,160 --> 00:42:57,360 Speaker 1: talking to me. Do you know about silence? You know 640 00:42:57,400 --> 00:43:00,200 Speaker 1: you don't have to fill every second of one it's 641 00:43:00,280 --> 00:43:03,359 Speaker 1: quiet between us with talking. The things that come out 642 00:43:03,360 --> 00:43:07,920 Speaker 1: of your mouth sometimes seem like thoughts. I mean, there 643 00:43:07,920 --> 00:43:12,120 Speaker 1: isn't everything to say a thought, I mean everything. Excuse me, 644 00:43:12,719 --> 00:43:16,440 Speaker 1: I'm Tom Cruise and I'm getting a real emotion sense 645 00:43:16,520 --> 00:43:22,360 Speaker 1: from this area. Do you two love each other? I 646 00:43:22,360 --> 00:43:25,560 Speaker 1: don't think. We kind of tried. We tried it, to 647 00:43:25,719 --> 00:43:28,640 Speaker 1: be honest with me, because I'm trying to calibrate my emotions. Now. 648 00:43:28,800 --> 00:43:31,440 Speaker 1: Is there love in this room? I don't think so. 649 00:43:31,640 --> 00:43:36,879 Speaker 1: I mean it was we weren't compatible sexually and emotionally 650 00:43:37,160 --> 00:43:40,920 Speaker 1: also not compatible. I mean I think the opposite. I 651 00:43:41,000 --> 00:43:43,759 Speaker 1: was totally. I mean I'm a dent on board and 652 00:43:43,880 --> 00:43:48,400 Speaker 1: I have since the chief put us together. So and 653 00:43:48,480 --> 00:43:50,759 Speaker 1: that's what as a woman on the police force with 654 00:43:50,840 --> 00:43:54,080 Speaker 1: a man on the police force, it's kind of these 655 00:43:54,080 --> 00:43:56,040 Speaker 1: things kind of happened sometimes. And I know with you 656 00:43:56,160 --> 00:44:00,400 Speaker 1: as like a man, Tom Cruise, um, kind of like 657 00:44:00,440 --> 00:44:03,040 Speaker 1: maybe you and Katie Holmes is what I would maybe 658 00:44:03,080 --> 00:44:12,200 Speaker 1: compared to maybe like all of us and you leases what, hey, 659 00:44:12,200 --> 00:44:16,520 Speaker 1: you're under a rest. Wait I'm talking round. I'm human, 660 00:44:16,600 --> 00:44:22,600 Speaker 1: Tom Cruise. This guy has no bum? What? What the hell? 661 00:44:23,560 --> 00:44:30,399 Speaker 1: Right now? Wait? Why would you? That's very mean? Yeah? 662 00:44:30,480 --> 00:44:32,799 Speaker 1: And I mean he runs weird too. I mean I've 663 00:44:32,800 --> 00:44:34,680 Speaker 1: always thought he runs weird, but he, I mean, he 664 00:44:34,840 --> 00:44:37,759 Speaker 1: looks really weird trying to eat dinner. Can we just 665 00:44:37,800 --> 00:44:43,040 Speaker 1: please dinner. Can you not talk about work? What's going 666 00:44:43,080 --> 00:44:45,680 Speaker 1: on with that waiter over there? I don't know, I 667 00:44:45,680 --> 00:44:48,879 Speaker 1: don't what's up? What's up with his hair? I don't know, 668 00:44:49,440 --> 00:44:53,719 Speaker 1: I don't know. Look, sorry, did you want something else here? 669 00:44:53,719 --> 00:44:59,160 Speaker 1: I've heard you point at me. Um, you heard I 670 00:44:59,280 --> 00:45:02,359 Speaker 1: love Brad and end to get back together. I meant 671 00:45:02,400 --> 00:45:07,440 Speaker 1: from the restaurant. From the restaurant, Yeah, just another round? 672 00:45:07,480 --> 00:45:16,680 Speaker 1: I think soup. Yes. Excuse me, folks, excuse me, folks. Sorry, 673 00:45:16,680 --> 00:45:18,680 Speaker 1: I'm the manager here at this red Lobster. Just want 674 00:45:18,680 --> 00:45:21,360 Speaker 1: to let you guys know, Uh, the men's bathroom is 675 00:45:21,400 --> 00:45:23,840 Speaker 1: just going to be out of order for a little while. 676 00:45:24,480 --> 00:45:28,520 Speaker 1: Just why is that? Um? There appears to have been 677 00:45:28,520 --> 00:45:31,839 Speaker 1: either a genie or a homicide. Um, so we might 678 00:45:31,840 --> 00:45:36,200 Speaker 1: have a TMZ scoop. I probably should not have mentioned 679 00:45:36,239 --> 00:45:39,480 Speaker 1: that to someone from TNZ. For forget that I said anything. Uh, 680 00:45:40,280 --> 00:45:43,360 Speaker 1: where's my lobster? Biss Brandon, you go table to table 681 00:45:43,400 --> 00:45:47,719 Speaker 1: and tell people there was a homicide? I did, I did. 682 00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:51,040 Speaker 1: I'm looking at the assistant I'm the assistant manager. Okay, 683 00:45:51,040 --> 00:45:53,560 Speaker 1: So you know, when there's a situation that arises, I 684 00:45:53,560 --> 00:45:55,880 Speaker 1: feel like it's something I need to take care of Brandon. 685 00:45:55,920 --> 00:46:00,200 Speaker 1: You're really overstepping what your your your your responsibilities and priorities. Look, 686 00:46:00,239 --> 00:46:04,319 Speaker 1: I had this badge made this, says junior assistant detective. Now, 687 00:46:04,400 --> 00:46:07,440 Speaker 1: so not only my assistant manager, I'm also an assistant detective. 688 00:46:07,480 --> 00:46:10,080 Speaker 1: And look I have all this string, can I I'm 689 00:46:10,120 --> 00:46:11,640 Speaker 1: just gonna put some of this up around the red 690 00:46:11,680 --> 00:46:17,839 Speaker 1: lobs and thank man. Yeah, oh hey, Mike, grab this thread. 691 00:46:17,840 --> 00:46:19,319 Speaker 1: Put it over there, will you? While we're well, while 692 00:46:19,320 --> 00:46:25,120 Speaker 1: I got thanks Pal, And it all comes back to aliens. 693 00:46:25,280 --> 00:46:29,200 Speaker 1: It's aliens, blob aliens. The forensic parctologist was right, don't 694 00:46:29,239 --> 00:46:31,960 Speaker 1: you understand brand? Listen, I'm gonna have to put you 695 00:46:32,000 --> 00:46:39,200 Speaker 1: on paid leave. Okay, I'm sorry, paid leave. I'm gonna 696 00:46:39,280 --> 00:46:44,080 Speaker 1: have the Brandon. What kind of restaurant is this? I 697 00:46:44,120 --> 00:46:47,120 Speaker 1: don't it's it's a red lobster. But right, it's a 698 00:46:47,120 --> 00:46:51,600 Speaker 1: red lobster. You're not fired or no, I don't want 699 00:46:51,600 --> 00:46:56,640 Speaker 1: to talk about it. I'm unpaid leave. That's the beautiful part. 700 00:46:57,000 --> 00:47:01,879 Speaker 1: So look this part ovid thing, I mean, you're still 701 00:47:01,960 --> 00:47:06,080 Speaker 1: doing takeout orders, right, they are still doing takeout orders. 702 00:47:06,200 --> 00:47:09,960 Speaker 1: I'm not doing takeouts. So you've been furloughed. Well, I 703 00:47:10,000 --> 00:47:12,640 Speaker 1: am getting paid for it, but I guess I have. 704 00:47:12,960 --> 00:47:16,279 Speaker 1: Well look looking over your finances. You've you've you've gotten 705 00:47:16,360 --> 00:47:19,960 Speaker 1: rid of sixty three employees over the past three years, 706 00:47:20,400 --> 00:47:24,759 Speaker 1: yet continue to pay them. Yeah, okay, so you've just 707 00:47:24,800 --> 00:47:27,359 Speaker 1: decided that these people are going on paid leave, they're 708 00:47:27,360 --> 00:47:28,920 Speaker 1: on baid leave. They need to cool off before they 709 00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:32,239 Speaker 1: come out. Why why not? Why not fire them? Well? 710 00:47:32,239 --> 00:47:37,799 Speaker 1: I mean, oh, I don't know. I never thought I 711 00:47:37,800 --> 00:47:42,840 Speaker 1: could do that, honestly. Uh. Also, all the lobsters in 712 00:47:42,840 --> 00:47:48,320 Speaker 1: this tank are dead. Oh I know that. So I'm 713 00:47:48,360 --> 00:47:52,040 Speaker 1: the one who killed your son, but it was because 714 00:47:52,040 --> 00:47:55,560 Speaker 1: I was looking for all of the human emotions here 715 00:47:55,560 --> 00:47:59,520 Speaker 1: on your planning. I'm so confused. I'm sorry. Tom Cruise 716 00:47:59,560 --> 00:48:03,040 Speaker 1: shows to my door and says he killed my son. 717 00:48:03,160 --> 00:48:05,920 Speaker 1: My son's ever met Tom Percy. Doesn't want to be 718 00:48:05,960 --> 00:48:08,239 Speaker 1: an actor, he doesn't want to be a scientologist. He 719 00:48:08,400 --> 00:48:11,640 Speaker 1: just like you to work it out. Where's the salami? 720 00:48:12,680 --> 00:48:20,120 Speaker 1: Your chair? See the fucking cat? How often was your 721 00:48:20,120 --> 00:48:24,600 Speaker 1: son home? Why are you asking this question? You say 722 00:48:24,680 --> 00:48:27,239 Speaker 1: you killed my son, and now you're sounds like you're 723 00:48:27,320 --> 00:48:29,880 Speaker 1: much to go down like a bad parenting route. Okay, 724 00:48:30,239 --> 00:48:34,680 Speaker 1: I was just that I'm not a bad parent. Okay, 725 00:48:34,760 --> 00:48:37,959 Speaker 1: could you spend more time in the gym than you did? Here? Yes, 726 00:48:40,840 --> 00:48:47,239 Speaker 1: open up, it's the police. There's five men and three 727 00:48:47,280 --> 00:48:52,319 Speaker 1: women here from the police. Why would he specify that 728 00:48:53,640 --> 00:48:56,319 Speaker 1: it's gonna hear my voice? Can you open the door? 729 00:48:56,360 --> 00:49:03,080 Speaker 1: You're close to do it. I've been tracking you for years. 730 00:49:03,440 --> 00:49:07,800 Speaker 1: I've been tracking you for years. You motherfucker. We're getting 731 00:49:08,320 --> 00:49:12,279 Speaker 1: You've been getting it. Everyone's ass. I know it's you. 732 00:49:12,840 --> 00:49:19,960 Speaker 1: I know it's you. What are you gonna do? Arrest me? Yeah? Yeah? 733 00:49:20,400 --> 00:49:23,800 Speaker 1: If hold that? Look how old that look? Weird? Crazy 734 00:49:23,880 --> 00:49:28,000 Speaker 1: man arrests human Tom Cruise. I think people are going 735 00:49:28,040 --> 00:49:30,520 Speaker 1: to be happy that you did that. You keep saying 736 00:49:31,120 --> 00:49:35,680 Speaker 1: nothing like Tom Cruise. I can name all of his movies. Okay, okay, 737 00:49:37,719 --> 00:49:49,400 Speaker 1: starting with taps? Taps? Why did I give you taps? Now? Listen, Gabe. 738 00:49:49,440 --> 00:49:51,560 Speaker 1: I love it. I think this is fantastic. Your memoirs 739 00:49:51,560 --> 00:49:55,279 Speaker 1: are crazy, alright, your years as a forensic productologists love it, 740 00:49:55,360 --> 00:49:56,839 Speaker 1: love it. But look, I don't know if we're gonna 741 00:49:56,840 --> 00:49:59,520 Speaker 1: be able to adapt this all right, all right into 742 00:49:59,600 --> 00:50:02,880 Speaker 1: that Uh well, I mean, look, true detectives already got 743 00:50:02,920 --> 00:50:05,160 Speaker 1: a writing squad, right, they're already doing their thing, all right, 744 00:50:05,520 --> 00:50:07,799 Speaker 1: and uh, I don't know they're gonna they're gonna take it. 745 00:50:07,880 --> 00:50:09,759 Speaker 1: We can pitch it to them, baby, we can pitch 746 00:50:09,800 --> 00:50:14,719 Speaker 1: it to them the baby, my sweet baby baby Detective 747 00:50:14,800 --> 00:50:20,120 Speaker 1: season what are you thinking doing? Look, we can fictionalize it, 748 00:50:20,200 --> 00:50:23,880 Speaker 1: or we could go full doc docuseries, you know Netflix, 749 00:50:24,280 --> 00:50:28,400 Speaker 1: Netflix interested? Oh my sweet little baby? Maybe maybe by baby, 750 00:50:28,440 --> 00:50:35,240 Speaker 1: but stuff touching my face? Jesus, Jimmy, how many times? Please? 751 00:50:35,480 --> 00:50:40,120 Speaker 1: You don't work at the agency anymore? Sorry about that, 752 00:50:40,200 --> 00:50:49,839 Speaker 1: jim that's our show, paid leave to go. Let's thank 753 00:50:49,880 --> 00:50:53,120 Speaker 1: Oliver Alkina. Shall we in a in a particular order? 754 00:50:53,200 --> 00:50:56,000 Speaker 1: Chris a Verando, Thank you so much, buddy, Thank you. 755 00:50:56,080 --> 00:50:58,440 Speaker 1: I love you, Mark and still fun to play with you, Caroline, 756 00:50:58,440 --> 00:50:59,920 Speaker 1: still fun to play with you. So glad we get 757 00:50:59,920 --> 00:51:03,759 Speaker 1: the spend a little time together. And happy holidays to 758 00:51:03,880 --> 00:51:06,279 Speaker 1: us all. Mark Gagli already thanks to you as well. 759 00:51:06,320 --> 00:51:08,600 Speaker 1: Good sir. Oh it's a pleasure man. You guys are awesome. 760 00:51:08,600 --> 00:51:11,600 Speaker 1: This always makes me happy. And where folks might look 761 00:51:11,640 --> 00:51:15,080 Speaker 1: to find you and your wares? Uh at Mark gags 762 00:51:15,160 --> 00:51:18,160 Speaker 1: on Twitter and Blood and Treasure season two coming up 763 00:51:18,200 --> 00:51:25,080 Speaker 1: January January that's so fucking awesome. Uh, Chris dash Alvarado 764 00:51:25,200 --> 00:51:27,920 Speaker 1: dot com. Is that what was left out of the conversation? 765 00:51:28,520 --> 00:51:31,600 Speaker 1: That's exactly what was left at that's Chris dash Alvarado 766 00:51:31,920 --> 00:51:34,680 Speaker 1: dot com. Come stop by with some fun, take some 767 00:51:35,080 --> 00:51:38,279 Speaker 1: home to your family. That's right, So don't forget that 768 00:51:38,320 --> 00:51:44,560 Speaker 1: to go bag. Thank you both, Caroline Carter, Yeah, thanks 769 00:51:44,640 --> 00:51:49,880 Speaker 1: for having me, Thanks for being had plans for the 770 00:51:49,920 --> 00:51:55,160 Speaker 1: rest of the day. Um, I might try to find 771 00:51:55,200 --> 00:51:57,600 Speaker 1: some chestnuts if anyone knows where I can get them. 772 00:51:57,640 --> 00:52:00,680 Speaker 1: I'm trying to make some chestnuts. I think j Max 773 00:52:00,719 --> 00:52:10,200 Speaker 1: hasn't They might feel nuts. Okay, let you know where 774 00:52:10,239 --> 00:52:15,760 Speaker 1: are you exactly are you? Yeah? I moved. I moved. 775 00:52:15,880 --> 00:52:20,480 Speaker 1: I moved. Okay, Okay, so that's why the background looks different. Yeah, 776 00:52:20,520 --> 00:52:25,600 Speaker 1: that's right. Still in la unfortunately, Craig Ankowski. You're still 777 00:52:25,640 --> 00:52:28,160 Speaker 1: in l A, l A unfortunately as well? Aren't you 778 00:52:28,520 --> 00:52:33,640 Speaker 1: as far as here for a little long hole? Damns 779 00:52:33,680 --> 00:52:38,759 Speaker 1: all everyone? How is the new uh December of craigslists 780 00:52:39,000 --> 00:52:41,919 Speaker 1: coming together? We watched three movies, haven't recorded one yet, 781 00:52:41,920 --> 00:52:45,560 Speaker 1: but we got some time. It's nine days till Christmas. 782 00:52:45,560 --> 00:52:51,040 Speaker 1: Fair enough, fair enough, and thank you, Joey Grierman, how's 783 00:52:51,080 --> 00:52:54,160 Speaker 1: that new Instagram account working out? I mean, so far, 784 00:52:54,280 --> 00:52:56,680 Speaker 1: so good. Thanking people anyone who follows me and gets 785 00:52:56,680 --> 00:52:59,080 Speaker 1: a little thank you video, because I do appreciate it. 786 00:52:59,360 --> 00:53:01,359 Speaker 1: I mean, it's can you you seem to have six 787 00:53:02,719 --> 00:53:05,920 Speaker 1: followers already and you just started a week ago. I think, Yeah, 788 00:53:05,920 --> 00:53:08,080 Speaker 1: it's a lot. It's a lot of thank you It's 789 00:53:08,360 --> 00:53:10,879 Speaker 1: it's um, it's a lot. But I'm happy to take 790 00:53:10,920 --> 00:53:12,960 Speaker 1: on that workload. I'm happy to take on that burden 791 00:53:13,000 --> 00:53:18,040 Speaker 1: because you can find me a god bless Jim Chum, 792 00:53:18,200 --> 00:53:21,879 Speaker 1: what is it really like? Three? It keeps dropping, people 793 00:53:21,920 --> 00:53:27,720 Speaker 1: keep on following me. Well, I've enjoyed every damn second 794 00:53:27,719 --> 00:53:30,760 Speaker 1: of it, and please don't stop. Let's thank our engineer 795 00:53:30,760 --> 00:53:35,960 Speaker 1: and producing the stars being fine folks, and I heart media. 796 00:53:38,440 --> 00:53:41,279 Speaker 1: I'm your host, Kevin Pollack reminding you that this is 797 00:53:41,360 --> 00:53:43,560 Speaker 1: the time to be kind to one another. But it 798 00:53:43,600 --> 00:53:47,479 Speaker 1: doesn't end at the what's happening with this, Mike, come 799 00:53:47,520 --> 00:53:54,560 Speaker 1: on already? Well you uh you eat one, Mike. Um, 800 00:53:54,600 --> 00:53:56,560 Speaker 1: it doesn't end the end of the year. Please remember 801 00:53:56,560 --> 00:53:59,080 Speaker 1: to be kind to each other and have each other's backsdammon. 802 00:53:59,200 --> 00:54:01,960 Speaker 1: In the new year, UH, and wear a mask when 803 00:54:02,000 --> 00:54:04,799 Speaker 1: you go outside. You sign up a pitch until next time.