WEBVTT - Miss Heather McDonald: My Dating Guru

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<v Speaker 1>Misspelling with Tori Spelling and iHeartRadio podcast.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, screw tender, Like when you have Heather McDonald, you

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<v Speaker 2>don't need a dating app.

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<v Speaker 3>So Heather is talking to me all about dating because I.

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<v Speaker 2>Am her newly single friend and we're talking all about

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<v Speaker 2>it here. It is the bonus dating episode.

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<v Speaker 3>You never knew you needed. How you dating anyone? Thank

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<v Speaker 3>you for asking? Now do you want to or no?

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I've gotten so used to just being with my

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<v Speaker 2>kids now that I don't know what I could possibly

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<v Speaker 2>be able to give someone else. But it would be

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<v Speaker 2>nice to feel those feelings again, you feel excited about

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<v Speaker 2>like romance or something.

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<v Speaker 1>I think I think where you're at as good. I

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<v Speaker 1>think you just not everybody has to like be with

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<v Speaker 1>somebody and having a lot of friends that have gotten

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<v Speaker 1>divorced at different stages in life, with different stages of

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<v Speaker 1>their kids. I just think you just you know, you

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<v Speaker 1>were with Dean for so long everything. I just think,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, like if it happens, it happens. If you're

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<v Speaker 1>not like, but it can be really fun when the

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<v Speaker 1>time comes. Like my friends that do go on it,

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<v Speaker 1>they're very they're very successful, Like I'm always like there.

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<v Speaker 3>I think a lot of guys.

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<v Speaker 1>Are into women you know that are not twenty five,

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<v Speaker 1>and they do not have trouble getting dates at all.

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<v Speaker 3>Nobody they last into like love.

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<v Speaker 1>No, but like if you do like the abs and stuff,

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<v Speaker 1>but that's hard, you know, your celebrity. So it's like

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<v Speaker 1>but with by other friends like no, Like my friends

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<v Speaker 1>are attractive and put together, but they get a lot

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<v Speaker 1>of I love looking at the thing like a single

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<v Speaker 1>friends and see them and you see what's out there.

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<v Speaker 1>But I think it's also really hard because I think

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<v Speaker 1>I think a guy over fifty who's divorced has it.

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<v Speaker 1>It's got to be the greatest time of their life

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<v Speaker 1>because when you think about it, a guy who's like

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<v Speaker 1>gen X, who's like fifty ish, it was probably really

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<v Speaker 1>hard to get a girlfriend and get laid in high school,

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<v Speaker 1>if not impossible, same thing in college. Then they have

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<v Speaker 1>their wife, you know, for whatever twenty years and then

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<v Speaker 1>they're divorced, and now it's just so easy for them

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<v Speaker 1>to get a girl.

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<v Speaker 3>All they have to do is be.

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<v Speaker 1>Able to you know, own a home, and like every

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<v Speaker 1>girl is like oh okay.

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<v Speaker 2>I think it's like you've got to get a guy

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<v Speaker 2>that that is my soul right.

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<v Speaker 1>Now, you're going to get a guy that's not been

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<v Speaker 1>on that that long.

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<v Speaker 3>I think you keep referring to it.

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<v Speaker 2>Are you talking about the apps and apps apps you

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<v Speaker 2>can't get?

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<v Speaker 3>What do you mean? I can't get somebody without an app?

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<v Speaker 1>Now I'm talking about it, like, yeah, if I refuse

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<v Speaker 1>to do the app, like I think, I mean, I think,

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<v Speaker 1>then I think you get you know, I do think

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<v Speaker 1>like a matchmaker situation, or like I think people are

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<v Speaker 1>going to move more towards like group things, group things,

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<v Speaker 1>like where you actually show up in person single people,

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<v Speaker 1>not group sex. I'm not like where you actually show

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<v Speaker 1>up in person and it's like everybody bring their single friend.

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<v Speaker 1>Like I think people are going to start moving towards that.

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<v Speaker 3>I'm not doing that. I don't know.

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<v Speaker 2>I just honestly, I never thought i'd be fifty two,

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<v Speaker 2>have five kids and suddenly be single. Like it's just

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<v Speaker 2>it's exhausted. You just don't You're a place where you

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<v Speaker 2>just don't have to start over. And I know I'm

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<v Speaker 2>too tired to start over at fifty. You don't need

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<v Speaker 2>to start over.

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<v Speaker 1>Like I have a I have a friend who's dating

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<v Speaker 1>like a much younger guy, and they've been together like

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<v Speaker 1>four years, and she's right off the bat meets anybody,

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<v Speaker 1>She's like, yes, I have a boyfriend that's, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>significantly younger than I am, and this is how we

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<v Speaker 1>met and da da da, And she's like, yeah, I

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<v Speaker 1>know that. People are like, oooh, what's that about? You know,

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<v Speaker 1>She's like, I don't care. Like we have a blast

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<v Speaker 1>and I'm not going to have his child, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>like I'm older, I'm not gonna have his child. We

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<v Speaker 1>have a great time. He's super sweet to me. He's

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<v Speaker 1>not going to like steal my money. And you know,

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<v Speaker 1>if then ten years we're not together, so what Like,

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<v Speaker 1>so what I'm having a person?

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<v Speaker 3>She has to start over again? Now, no, you don't,

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<v Speaker 3>But why do you have to start over? That's the thing.

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<v Speaker 1>Who cares if you if you have ten years with

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<v Speaker 1>like a hot, fun, great guy that treates me really

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<v Speaker 1>sweet from like forty eight to fifty eight when he

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<v Speaker 1>was like in his mid thirties, and then once he

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<v Speaker 1>hits forty and you're like fifty eight, you kind of

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<v Speaker 1>decide to go your own way.

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<v Speaker 3>Because he don't have kids or who knows.

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<v Speaker 1>But so bad is what I'm saying, she already has

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<v Speaker 1>her kids, Charity has her life and her money, so

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<v Speaker 1>why not just be with who's ever fun? Unlike when

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<v Speaker 1>we were like twenty eight to thirty, you were looking

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<v Speaker 1>for that person to have kids with. Yeah, dad had

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<v Speaker 1>enough money or career that could elevate your life. Once

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<v Speaker 1>you're like over fifty, it doesn't really matter. You don't

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<v Speaker 1>need them for anything. But can companionship and sex. So

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<v Speaker 1>it's like, choose what is fun for you? And who

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<v Speaker 1>cares if somebody in the corner, some jealous bitch is

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<v Speaker 1>whispering like, oh, he's only he's only into her because

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<v Speaker 1>you know she has a nice home.

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<v Speaker 3>Who the fuck cares? Who cares?

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<v Speaker 2>That's not going to be happening in the corner. But

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<v Speaker 2>but what if I want, like for okay, so I've

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<v Speaker 2>never dated a musician my whole life, and I was like,

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<v Speaker 2>you know, once I was married, I was like that

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<v Speaker 2>was it, you know, and this is it for me?

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<v Speaker 3>But now I can date a musician.

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<v Speaker 2>But I don't know if I really want to date

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<v Speaker 2>a musician, like at my age or state of mind,

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<v Speaker 2>and I'm not really a music person anyway, I've never

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<v Speaker 2>dated But what if I want.

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<v Speaker 1>When you're not a music person, but you're like, why

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<v Speaker 1>not date a musician just because he thought it was hot?

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<v Speaker 3>Didn't you do? Didn't you date? Now do I talk

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<v Speaker 3>to And again we never dated?

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<v Speaker 1>I thought you guys did date in real life?

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<v Speaker 3>Oh okay, And I know I think I would have.

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<v Speaker 2>He was so we were like best friends, Like where's

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<v Speaker 2>my like Travis Barker and my second like phase in life?

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<v Speaker 3>Like where you know? Like that?

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<v Speaker 2>But then okay, anyway, like I could be that girl,

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<v Speaker 2>like I could be Courtney Kardashian. But I've also never

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<v Speaker 2>dated anyone that was like supremely independently wealthy, like would

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<v Speaker 2>fly me on a private plane and take me to

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<v Speaker 2>like maybe I call it.

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<v Speaker 1>I call it you want a Lauren Sancheza? You want

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<v Speaker 1>a Lauren Sanchez to shit, If you're gonna be with someone,

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<v Speaker 1>it needs to elevate your life to a to be

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<v Speaker 1>worth it, like a private, private private jet type of wealth.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, I could. Could that be a possibility. Absolutely, what

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<v Speaker 3>app do you go on for that? It could be

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<v Speaker 3>an ass could be it could you just don't know.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean I feel like, if you meet the right person,

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<v Speaker 1>I don't think girls realize how much power they have

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<v Speaker 1>as far as like, I think we were taught to

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<v Speaker 1>like play hard to get and all that, and I

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<v Speaker 1>don't really think you have to play hard to get,

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<v Speaker 1>not about sex, but just like I think you need

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<v Speaker 1>to show whoever you're interested in that you're interested in them.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, but then they have to work too, they have

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<v Speaker 3>to work too.

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<v Speaker 1>But I think you have to show that you like,

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<v Speaker 1>find them interesting, find them funny. These guys like want

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<v Speaker 1>to feel for whatever reason, when you meet someone over fifty,

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<v Speaker 1>like a guy they either was a horrible spouse or

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<v Speaker 1>they had a horrible spouse most likely, so they're either

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<v Speaker 1>a broken human being by a woman that shot on

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<v Speaker 1>them or they broke somebody else. So it's like it's

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<v Speaker 1>gonna be hard, but they're still the same guy that

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<v Speaker 1>you met when we were there's still the same type

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<v Speaker 1>of guys we met when they were twenty five, but

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<v Speaker 1>now they're like fifty five, and so it's just kind

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<v Speaker 1>of like you still can have all that same fun

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<v Speaker 1>and conversation and dating and you're still if you were

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<v Speaker 1>to really get out there, you'd find there was the

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<v Speaker 1>one that was like you had the great chemistry with

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<v Speaker 1>that's the player, the one that's like a little too

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<v Speaker 1>into you that now you're like, I mean, they're all

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<v Speaker 1>the same still there, They're all still from what I've

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<v Speaker 1>like studied for my friends.

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<v Speaker 3>They're all still the same, except instead.

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<v Speaker 1>Of it being nineteen ninety eight and you're at a

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<v Speaker 1>barn Manhattan beach, you're like, you know, going to Soho

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<v Speaker 1>and Malibu and having dinner and you know, and you

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<v Speaker 1>guys have you guys have homes. You know.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah, wow, So just okay, I say, you just kind

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<v Speaker 2>of have your heart opened.

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<v Speaker 3>But I don't know if I kind of put it

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<v Speaker 3>out there and you just are like, huh, I don't know.

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<v Speaker 3>If I want a guy over fifty, yeah, go for younger,

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<v Speaker 3>maybe like mid to late forties. That sounds fair.

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<v Speaker 2>I've always been with older guys. Not Dean's eight years older.

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<v Speaker 2>It's not like a huge jump. But I'm just saying like.

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<v Speaker 1>That's the other thing, Yeah, Like do you want like

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<v Speaker 1>another Like when I'm married and I like when I

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<v Speaker 1>go like and I see these guys that are not

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<v Speaker 1>my husband that or that age, I'm like, oh my god.

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<v Speaker 1>I think if something happened, I just I don't think

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<v Speaker 1>i'd be pursuing that. I think I would be going

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<v Speaker 1>for the younger person really, because I wouldn't be looking

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<v Speaker 1>to get married again or have kids, or I don't

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<v Speaker 1>I'm not in a financial place where I need to

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<v Speaker 1>like move in with someone. Like I have a friend

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<v Speaker 1>who's been with her boyfriend after her divorce, and she

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<v Speaker 1>had like a lot of boyfriends and then she got

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<v Speaker 1>this great guy. They've been together for like six years.

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<v Speaker 1>They just got engaged and she does she's an executive.

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<v Speaker 1>She does fine in life, and he does too, and

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<v Speaker 1>they are like, we're not gonna get married till his

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<v Speaker 1>youngest is like in college, where she's like, I just

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<v Speaker 1>don't want to deal with that. I don't want to

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<v Speaker 1>be the stepmother. I don't want to like start rearranging

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<v Speaker 1>the house. In the meantime, he's gonna, like, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>start remodeling his house so that in three years when

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<v Speaker 1>they get married, then they can live together. But in

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<v Speaker 1>the meantime, I'm like, I think you're being so smart

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<v Speaker 1>about it, Like why you know, if you financially don't

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<v Speaker 1>need to move in with someone, you don't need to

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<v Speaker 1>sleep with someone every night in the same room.

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<v Speaker 3>I don't think so I'd prefer not to.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, so have a boyfriend that you see once in

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<v Speaker 1>a while, or go have sexy weekends or whatever, and

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<v Speaker 1>then all those other nights you just are like by yourself,

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<v Speaker 1>watching your show, scrolling TikTok, just with your kids.

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<v Speaker 3>Okay, my friend, thank you so much. I love you. Yes,

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<v Speaker 3>thank you so much. To see you in person so

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<v Speaker 3>we can talk shit.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes, let's definitely have you come on the show.

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<v Speaker 3>And then we'll go and we'll take.

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<v Speaker 1>The cart and see if we see any cute golfers

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<v Speaker 1>for you.

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<v Speaker 3>Oh, at your country club, we pick me. Yes, okay, okay, okay,

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<v Speaker 3>sounds like good.

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<v Speaker 1>All right, sounds good.