WEBVTT - Mrs. Mashgalopsis Calls A Salon

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<v Speaker 1>Don't answer the phone. Elvis durand the Elvis durand phones happen.

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<v Speaker 2>Here we go.

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<v Speaker 1>You've heard all about it. We're dying to hear the

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<v Speaker 1>final product. Danielle, what's it all about?

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<v Speaker 3>It's basically missus Moshcallopsis calling a salon to make an

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<v Speaker 3>appointment for a perm and they're not very helpful.

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<v Speaker 1>And who is miss Moscallopsis? I am number? Who is she? Oh,

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<v Speaker 1>she's just an old lady. Okay, here we go, missus

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<v Speaker 1>Moscallopsis calling to make an appointment.

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<v Speaker 4>Good morning, Yes, I I'd like to make an appointment please. Okay,

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<v Speaker 4>what are you looking to have done?

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<v Speaker 1>A perm?

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<v Speaker 4>Okay? When are you looking to come in?

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<v Speaker 1>Mmm? How about Tuesday?

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<v Speaker 4>Next Tuesday?

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<v Speaker 1>That's good.

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<v Speaker 4>Okay. What time of the day are you available?

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<v Speaker 1>Seven am?

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<v Speaker 4>We open it tendy, but it takes me a.

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<v Speaker 3>While to get there, and I'm going to have to

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<v Speaker 3>start on Monday to get there for Tuesday.

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<v Speaker 1>I'm eighty two years old.

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<v Speaker 4>We told you that seven is not available. Oh, we

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<v Speaker 4>open up at ten am.

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<v Speaker 3>And the other lady that used to do my hair

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<v Speaker 3>passed away and she used to take me at seven.

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<v Speaker 4>Well, we don't have anybody here. That opens the salon

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<v Speaker 4>at seven o'clock.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, then how about Monday at sex.

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<v Speaker 4>We don't work at set, we don't work on Mondays,

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<v Speaker 4>and we never open at seven am. We open at

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<v Speaker 4>ten o'clock in the morning.

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<v Speaker 1>So Tuesday at seven thirty, no.

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<v Speaker 4>Sweetheart, we open at ten am.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, so seven thirty, No, sweetheart.

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<v Speaker 4>It's ten o'clock. Okay. I'm very busy and I do

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<v Speaker 4>not have the time to stay on the phone with you.

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<v Speaker 4>I cannot help you any further. I have to go now,

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<v Speaker 4>Thank you, goodbye, Good afternoons.

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<v Speaker 3>You not speaking Hi, I'd like to make an appointment, deer.

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<v Speaker 4>You just called, and I'm sorry we don't open at

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<v Speaker 4>the time that you'd like to have an appointment.

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<v Speaker 1>I'd like an appointment at nine.

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<v Speaker 4>No, sweetheart, we open at ten.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't understand stand.

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<v Speaker 4>Why again, Oh that's what time we open.

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<v Speaker 1>Why are you getting so mad at me?

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<v Speaker 4>I'm trying to explain to you, and you're not understanding.

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<v Speaker 2>Dear.

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<v Speaker 4>I would be happy to accommodate you at ten o'clock

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<v Speaker 4>if you'd like to come in next Tuesday.

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<v Speaker 1>Why why are you calling me, dear?

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<v Speaker 4>I need to be nice to you.

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<v Speaker 1>My name my name is.

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<v Speaker 4>I'm sorry I cannot help you. Please don't call back.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay, ten o'clock, it's good.

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<v Speaker 4>Okay. What is your name?

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<v Speaker 1>What?

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<v Speaker 4>What is your name? Please?

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<v Speaker 1>Huh?

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<v Speaker 4>I'm sorry I didn't hear you. What your name?

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<v Speaker 1>What?

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<v Speaker 4>Yes? Can you hear me?

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<v Speaker 1>I'm sorry, I can't hear very well.

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<v Speaker 4>Okay, I asked what your name is?

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<v Speaker 1>Hello?

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<v Speaker 4>Good morning, I saw Can I help you?

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<v Speaker 1>I'd like to make an appointment for my firm, Yes.

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<v Speaker 4>For next Tuesday at ten o'clock? Uh?

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<v Speaker 1>Huh?

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<v Speaker 4>What is your name?

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<v Speaker 1>Mascalopsis?

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<v Speaker 4>Sell that please?

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<v Speaker 1>Okay? M A. S. Scalopsis?

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<v Speaker 4>Okay. What is your first name?

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<v Speaker 1>Linda?

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<v Speaker 4>Okay, so we'll see you next week at ten am.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay? Can I bring my dog with me? No?

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<v Speaker 4>Absolutely not. No pet's allowed.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh but it's my seeing eye dog. No, but I

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<v Speaker 1>need it.

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<v Speaker 4>Well, miss, I'm sorry, I don't don't don't know if

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<v Speaker 4>we could accommodate you.

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<v Speaker 1>Then, okay, that is it?

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<v Speaker 2>Massapequa, No, dear, we're in Staten Island, New York. Staten,

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<v Speaker 2>We're in Staten Island. Maybe you're calling the wrong salon.

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<v Speaker 2>Massapequa is Long Island, right island, Staten Island.

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<v Speaker 1>You're on the island.

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<v Speaker 4>Staten Island, not Long Island. It's a different island.

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<v Speaker 1>Okay. So seven o'clock, no.

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<v Speaker 4>Dear, that was ten o'clock next Tuesday.

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<v Speaker 3>Ten o'clock next Tuesday, and massa peak with Staten Island.

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<v Speaker 4>No Dan, I'm sorry you do you not understanding? Okay?

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<v Speaker 4>This is this is a salon in Staten Island. Okay,

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<v Speaker 4>what good afternoon?

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<v Speaker 2>My thinking.

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<v Speaker 1>So I'll be in at ten for my free perm

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<v Speaker 1>on Tuesday.

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<v Speaker 4>Smith perm started one hundred dollars, and if you're getting

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<v Speaker 4>a haircut, that's an additional thirty So it's one thirty

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<v Speaker 4>five plus tax and gratuities one hundred dollars.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, do you know how much? It wasn't my old salon?

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<v Speaker 4>I'm sorry. Those of our prices.

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<v Speaker 1>There fifteen dollars.

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<v Speaker 4>So those aren't all prices.

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<v Speaker 3>What kind of an establishment doesn't give a senior citizen.

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<v Speaker 4>Disc I'm sorry, we don't give seen a discount.

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<v Speaker 1>I don't have much hair.

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<v Speaker 4>I'm very sorry. Those are all prices and we do

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<v Speaker 4>not negotiate all prices. Okay, so the crazy person on

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<v Speaker 4>the phone again, I have to go. I am hanging

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<v Speaker 4>up the phone. Goodbye.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh before you go. I have to tell you something.

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<v Speaker 1>This is Danielle and Arrow. You've just been phone tapped.

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<v Speaker 4>Jesus Christ. I'm I'm busy, I'm working. This is not funny.

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<v Speaker 1>The Elvis Duran phone tap. This phone tab was pre

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<v Speaker 1>recorded with permission granted by all of participation.

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<v Speaker 4>The Elvis Duran phone tab only on Elvis Duran in

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<v Speaker 4>the Morning Show