WEBVTT - Paradise Veterans with Hannah Berner 0:00:00.480 --> 0:00:04.960 Hell, I Suck at Dating with Dengler, Dared Haven and 0:00:05.080 --> 0:00:11.560 I Heart Radio podcast. Hey, welcome to help I suck 0:00:11.600 --> 0:00:14.360 at dating. I'm Jared. Everybody, welcome to help I suck 0:00:14.400 --> 0:00:17.520 at dating? And yeah, no, it's just me by myself 0:00:17.560 --> 0:00:26.760 today and maybe we'll have Dean come on the pocket. 0:00:26.760 --> 0:00:29.920 Oh you stopped talking. I wonder how annoying that is 0:00:30.040 --> 0:00:33.279 for listeners right there as we talk over recorded alternate 0:00:33.320 --> 0:00:36.000 and I keep that in. We should keep that in. 0:00:36.040 --> 0:00:38.599 But let's just give an alternate intro, just just for 0:00:38.720 --> 0:00:42.840 all intents and purposes. All right, you go? Are you eating? 0:00:43.000 --> 0:00:47.240 You go? Hey, welcome to help by sucking everybody? Why 0:00:47.280 --> 0:00:49.440 do I Why do I do these things? Why am 0:00:49.479 --> 0:00:52.479 I so gullible? You knew it? I can tell by 0:00:52.479 --> 0:00:54.200 the way you're looking at me that you knew something 0:00:54.280 --> 0:00:56.640 was up. I knew you're gonna talk. I knew it. Anyway, 0:00:56.680 --> 0:00:58.480 welcome to help I suck at dating. We have a 0:00:58.480 --> 0:01:02.600 great episode coming up. Uh. We have Hannah Burner coming 0:01:02.680 --> 0:01:06.080 up from her comedy towards the House Broken tour, which 0:01:06.080 --> 0:01:08.520 you can get dates and tickets. Will we'll share the information, 0:01:08.520 --> 0:01:11.080 but you can get at www dot Hannah Burner dot 0:01:11.120 --> 0:01:13.840 com that's b E R and E ER. We're very 0:01:13.840 --> 0:01:17.720 excited for her to come on the podcast. She's very funny. First, 0:01:17.720 --> 0:01:20.440 we have to obviously talk about Bachelor and Paradise. Dean. 0:01:20.720 --> 0:01:23.240 You and I are both alums of this show. There's 0:01:23.280 --> 0:01:25.880 some crazy stuff happening. Do you have any initial thoughts? 0:01:25.880 --> 0:01:28.520 Have you been watching? Oh, I gotta ask before we 0:01:28.680 --> 0:01:31.759 start talking about this shared have you been watching? He actually, yeah, 0:01:31.800 --> 0:01:34.319 I watched both episodes this week. I did so well. 0:01:35.280 --> 0:01:41.880 Thank you, Because when I say that Kalin gets me 0:01:41.920 --> 0:01:45.039 excited about watching The Bachelor, I I can't ever confidently 0:01:45.080 --> 0:01:46.959 say that, but she gets me excited about watching Bachelor 0:01:47.080 --> 0:01:50.360 really and this season. This season it's like it's it's entertaining. 0:01:50.400 --> 0:01:53.160 I am already good. I almost like would watch it 0:01:53.160 --> 0:01:56.280 by myself even if she wasn't around. Um, it's been good, 0:01:56.280 --> 0:01:58.919 it's been entertaining. It's been like obviously super drama filled, 0:01:59.000 --> 0:02:01.120 so I guess maybe that's why were I am super 0:02:01.160 --> 0:02:04.520 into it. But yeah, I mean I've been I've been 0:02:04.600 --> 0:02:07.040 excited for every Monday and Tuesday of the week just 0:02:07.080 --> 0:02:09.240 to watch Bachelor in Paradise. I want to say I'm embarrassed, 0:02:09.240 --> 0:02:11.160 but I'm not. I'm not embarrassed. No, you shouldn't. You 0:02:11.160 --> 0:02:14.359 shouldn't be embarrassed. We we were on the show. That's 0:02:14.400 --> 0:02:17.240 way worse than watching the show. Okay, it's a really 0:02:17.280 --> 0:02:19.359 good point. That's a really good point. First and foremost, 0:02:20.000 --> 0:02:26.120 Joe and Um, oh my god, Serena, No, Joe and Kendall, 0:02:27.200 --> 0:02:30.400 Kelly on the mind, Joe and Kendall, your thoughts. I 0:02:31.520 --> 0:02:35.960 see both sides of it. Um, I didn't love seeing 0:02:36.080 --> 0:02:39.280 Kendall come down to the beach, but it's not it wasn't. 0:02:40.240 --> 0:02:42.560 It's not her fault. You know, Joe came down to 0:02:42.600 --> 0:02:43.919 the beach too, so it's not like we can point 0:02:43.960 --> 0:02:45.959 the finger out Kendall. And it just so happens that 0:02:46.040 --> 0:02:48.000 Joe came down first, and so he kind of gets 0:02:48.040 --> 0:02:49.640 like the benefit of the doubt in that sense. So 0:02:49.960 --> 0:02:51.760 I see both sides of it. I don't think anyone 0:02:51.840 --> 0:02:55.960 is to blame. Um, I don't think that there are 0:02:56.000 --> 0:02:58.680 any It seems like Joe is over it entirely. It 0:02:58.680 --> 0:03:02.799 seems like Kendall maybe, isn't. I think Kendall is much 0:03:02.800 --> 0:03:04.920 more into Joe than Joe's into Kendall right now. And 0:03:04.960 --> 0:03:09.160 it breaks my heart because I feel this is an 0:03:09.200 --> 0:03:12.239 example of two wonderful people who just didn't work out, 0:03:12.480 --> 0:03:15.120 who didn't make it in a relationship, and it sucks 0:03:15.120 --> 0:03:17.600 because usually in a relationship you have one person to 0:03:17.639 --> 0:03:19.680 blame more than the other, where this one, I just 0:03:19.840 --> 0:03:22.720 feel so bad for them both, because I love Kendall 0:03:22.760 --> 0:03:25.240 and Joe equally and I both think they're incredible people, 0:03:25.480 --> 0:03:28.960 and so like seeing them hurt over this, it's just like, oh, 0:03:29.000 --> 0:03:31.680 please get back together, because like, I can't emotionally take this, 0:03:31.720 --> 0:03:33.480 and I just want you guys to be happy. And 0:03:33.520 --> 0:03:35.760 it's totally apparent to me that Kendall's much more into 0:03:35.800 --> 0:03:38.960 Joe than Joe's into Kendall. And I just wish that 0:03:39.080 --> 0:03:42.120 she went down there with the intent of either being 0:03:42.160 --> 0:03:45.160 with Joe or dating other people. I think that was 0:03:45.200 --> 0:03:50.000 her only fault, because she went down there with apparently 0:03:50.040 --> 0:03:54.160 the mindset of, well, I still have feelings for Joe, 0:03:54.720 --> 0:03:58.280 but I am here to possibly date other people too, 0:03:58.320 --> 0:04:00.520 But I want to see if the doors still closed 0:04:00.560 --> 0:04:03.640 on Joe, and I wish that she went down there 0:04:03.680 --> 0:04:05.600 with the intent that you had. And this is why 0:04:05.600 --> 0:04:08.880 I tell everybody, because what you did so well, rightfully 0:04:08.920 --> 0:04:11.880 so was when you left you came back to Paradise 0:04:11.920 --> 0:04:14.000 and you were like, I'm only here for Calin. I'm 0:04:14.040 --> 0:04:17.280 only leaving here with Calin. I'm not staying. And that 0:04:17.400 --> 0:04:19.880 was such a great move and such a romantic one, 0:04:20.080 --> 0:04:23.479 and you looked great, obviously, But with Kendall, I just 0:04:23.520 --> 0:04:25.640 wish that she went down and said, Joe, I know 0:04:25.800 --> 0:04:28.480 that I said, you know, I didn't want to move 0:04:28.520 --> 0:04:31.560 to Chicago and that we were done, but I still 0:04:31.640 --> 0:04:33.760 have feelings. I miss you in my life. I want 0:04:33.760 --> 0:04:35.880 you in my life. I'm willing to give Chicago a 0:04:35.880 --> 0:04:38.560 try if you leave with me right now, or she 0:04:38.640 --> 0:04:41.840 goes down there and says, Joe, you know, I'm never 0:04:41.880 --> 0:04:44.200 moving to Chicago. I want to move on. And I 0:04:44.200 --> 0:04:46.680 felt like moving on I could do it in Paradise. 0:04:46.680 --> 0:04:48.479 It might have been the best place for me to 0:04:48.520 --> 0:04:51.120 move on. But instead it's like this middle ground where 0:04:51.120 --> 0:04:52.600 I'm like, well, do you want to be with Joe 0:04:52.680 --> 0:04:54.400 or do you want to date other people? Because you 0:04:54.480 --> 0:04:56.640 kind of want to be with Joe, but also you're 0:04:56.680 --> 0:05:00.560 staying in Paradise to maybe see if somebody else comes 0:05:00.560 --> 0:05:03.440 down the stairs, and you can't watch Joe make out 0:05:03.480 --> 0:05:07.360 with anybody else. It's like You're only gonna hurt yourself, right, 0:05:07.400 --> 0:05:09.400 I think, Jared, I think you just walked into the garage, 0:05:09.720 --> 0:05:12.400 grabbed the biggest thing you could find, and nail that 0:05:12.560 --> 0:05:16.720 right on the head. Because because when I was watching 0:05:16.760 --> 0:05:19.920 that whole exchange between them, you know, Kendall comes down, 0:05:20.080 --> 0:05:22.719 she has a conversation with Joe. First thing I noticed 0:05:22.920 --> 0:05:25.680 was the chemistry is still there, There's no question about it. 0:05:25.760 --> 0:05:28.679 They they're still bouncing off each other as they used to, 0:05:29.080 --> 0:05:32.080 but they never they're talking about why they broke up, 0:05:32.080 --> 0:05:35.480 but they never addressed how things could be better and 0:05:35.560 --> 0:05:37.400 moving forward. Kendall was never like, I want to move 0:05:37.400 --> 0:05:39.720 to Chicago, and Joe was never like, oh, I would 0:05:39.720 --> 0:05:42.240 totally move back to l A. There was never that conversation. 0:05:42.440 --> 0:05:47.719 So Kendall came down seemingly wanting to get Joe back, 0:05:47.880 --> 0:05:51.360 but never providing a solution as to how their relationship 0:05:51.800 --> 0:05:54.200 would would not fail like it did last time. So 0:05:54.240 --> 0:05:56.359 that was my biggest gripe with it. And then also 0:05:56.400 --> 0:05:58.400 to kind of even reverse a little bit more. When 0:05:58.520 --> 0:06:03.160 Joe was telling Arena about why him and Kendall broke up, 0:06:03.560 --> 0:06:07.160 he never really they at least it wasn't aired they 0:06:07.160 --> 0:06:11.520 definitely could have had a conversation, but he never spoke 0:06:11.520 --> 0:06:13.880 with her and she never spoke with him about what 0:06:13.960 --> 0:06:16.040 they would do if they were to leave Paradise because 0:06:16.040 --> 0:06:18.359 I know Serena doesn't live in Chicago. So it's like 0:06:18.400 --> 0:06:21.280 if Joe has to be in Chicago and his partner 0:06:21.320 --> 0:06:24.280 has to be in whatever city they're in, then like 0:06:24.760 --> 0:06:26.440 what are they doing? You know, why is Joe going 0:06:26.480 --> 0:06:28.320 to have another two year relationship with a girl that's 0:06:28.400 --> 0:06:30.720 not gonna want to move to Chicago? And I don't 0:06:30.720 --> 0:06:32.360 know if that's true or not. And again, like they 0:06:32.360 --> 0:06:34.400 definitely could have had that conversation that it just didn't 0:06:34.400 --> 0:06:37.839 get aired for whatever reason. Um, but it just seems 0:06:37.880 --> 0:06:42.000 like something that's so important that they just keep glossing 0:06:42.040 --> 0:06:44.240 over every single time. But I mean, it's gonna see 0:06:44.279 --> 0:06:48.440 Kettle down there. I I feel for her definitely, Like 0:06:48.520 --> 0:06:51.720 it'd be tough to go down to Paradise and see 0:06:51.760 --> 0:06:54.839 someone that you're like still kind of like in love with. 0:06:55.160 --> 0:06:56.520 I think she's definitely still in love with him. They 0:06:56.560 --> 0:06:59.880 were in love, and uh, especially like coming in so late, 0:07:00.040 --> 0:07:03.480 like she she's definitely starting well behind where he started, 0:07:03.480 --> 0:07:04.720 and so like, what is she going to do meet 0:07:04.720 --> 0:07:07.440 a guy. And that's another bad part totally because the 0:07:07.480 --> 0:07:11.160 problem is Joe. I bet you any money if Kendall 0:07:11.240 --> 0:07:13.160 was there, day one, Joe and Kendall will be dating. 0:07:13.560 --> 0:07:15.720 Because remember all the feelings that he was having in 0:07:15.760 --> 0:07:17.960 the beginning about how he didn't want to be there anymore. 0:07:18.240 --> 0:07:22.000 Everything reminded him Kendall, Like, what what happens if Kendall 0:07:22.000 --> 0:07:24.280 walked down those stairs while he was going through this time? 0:07:24.640 --> 0:07:26.920 I feel like there might have been something there. But 0:07:26.960 --> 0:07:31.000 now Joe has kind of moved on with Serena. They're happy, 0:07:31.080 --> 0:07:33.640 he's happy, and then Kendall comes walking down. He's like, well, 0:07:33.720 --> 0:07:35.920 part of my heart has already moved on. So she, 0:07:36.160 --> 0:07:40.120 like you said, is playing from behind. Yeah. Yeah, I 0:07:40.120 --> 0:07:41.600 guess this is one of those things we will never know. 0:07:41.760 --> 0:07:44.720 I will say I love Joe and Sterena together. Joe 0:07:44.800 --> 0:07:46.600 is a nice guy. Serena, from what I've seen it 0:07:46.640 --> 0:07:50.960 very seems like an incredibly uh sarcastic and like comedic person, 0:07:51.000 --> 0:07:52.720 which I really appreciate it. So they seem to have 0:07:53.040 --> 0:07:55.640 a very good relationship. Is it better or worse than 0:07:55.680 --> 0:07:57.760 Joe's and Kendall's. It's not my decision to make but 0:07:58.920 --> 0:08:01.320 so far what we see has been good for them, 0:08:01.560 --> 0:08:03.600 maybe bad for Kendall, But I do want to move 0:08:03.640 --> 0:08:07.320 on to Obviously, the main topic of the most recent 0:08:07.360 --> 0:08:11.360 week of Bachelor Paradise is well, like topic one A 0:08:11.480 --> 0:08:13.480 and one bat so one A in my opinion to 0:08:13.600 --> 0:08:18.560 be like Brendan and Piper, one B would be Chris 0:08:18.960 --> 0:08:22.000 and Alana and just Senya. But I do think that 0:08:22.320 --> 0:08:25.880 the Brendan Piper thing has kind of like grasps more 0:08:25.920 --> 0:08:28.080 headlines over the past week or so. So what is 0:08:28.120 --> 0:08:29.680 your take on that. I think it's all under the 0:08:29.760 --> 0:08:33.880 umbrella of scheming and talking before going to paradise, you know, right, 0:08:33.960 --> 0:08:36.440 But but let's say this, like there was definitely scheming 0:08:36.440 --> 0:08:39.120 and talking before. Okay, let me take that back. There 0:08:39.200 --> 0:08:43.600 was no scheming, but maybe talking before our paradise is 0:08:45.360 --> 0:08:47.480 definitely but I think that they're like kind of taking 0:08:47.520 --> 0:08:50.720 it to another level, Like there they're going above and 0:08:50.760 --> 0:08:52.880 beyond with that kind of stuff. Well, like Brendan and 0:08:52.920 --> 0:08:55.679 Piper are just lying about it like that's I think 0:08:55.679 --> 0:09:00.000 the most frustrating is Listen, we have Instagram followers. Instagram 0:09:00.040 --> 0:09:02.199 and followers is really cool and like when you go 0:09:02.280 --> 0:09:03.880 on the show of course there's a part of you 0:09:04.000 --> 0:09:06.040 that goes on for the business aspect of it now, 0:09:06.400 --> 0:09:08.920 like I think for Austin, for me Ashley at least, 0:09:08.960 --> 0:09:11.040 Like when we went on the show, of course we 0:09:11.080 --> 0:09:13.680 went on for love, but we went also for the opportunity, 0:09:13.720 --> 0:09:16.400 the experience to be on TV and to do these 0:09:16.440 --> 0:09:19.880 incredible things. And like we didn't really know about Instagram 0:09:19.920 --> 0:09:22.760 at the time. We just got super lucky. But now 0:09:23.040 --> 0:09:25.160 I don't blame people to go on the show and 0:09:25.320 --> 0:09:28.760 part for gathering and Instagram following, like it kind of 0:09:28.800 --> 0:09:30.800 comes with it, all of it. Where I put the 0:09:30.840 --> 0:09:33.920 fault on is if you're going to intentionally try to 0:09:34.000 --> 0:09:38.520 screw someone over and play the game to gain followers 0:09:38.559 --> 0:09:41.320 on Instagram, get the hell out of here. And nobody's 0:09:41.360 --> 0:09:45.240 got time for that. And so like it's like Brendan 0:09:45.320 --> 0:09:50.559 was intentionally lying to Natasha about their relationship and then 0:09:50.559 --> 0:09:53.480 he tried to like play it off like, oh, you 0:09:53.600 --> 0:09:58.160 had selective hearing, and he pretty much said to her 0:09:58.200 --> 0:10:00.520 face and behind the scenes that he didn't have any 0:10:00.559 --> 0:10:03.920 other prospects. And it's like, dude, don't be a jerk, alright, bro, Like, 0:10:04.040 --> 0:10:07.040 come on, man, So I agree, I agree with your 0:10:07.080 --> 0:10:10.400 larger point. But I do think that the biggest issue 0:10:10.679 --> 0:10:16.600 with what they what Brendan did, Brendon or Brandon Brendon did, 0:10:17.880 --> 0:10:20.800 the biggest thing in my opinion, Um, And you definitely 0:10:20.880 --> 0:10:23.680 touch on this a bit. It's not the scheming is 0:10:23.720 --> 0:10:26.520 like bad and like frowned upon, But there was so 0:10:26.600 --> 0:10:29.520 much time between the Paradise before this that I kind 0:10:29.559 --> 0:10:32.000 of can give them a pass. The biggest issue that 0:10:32.040 --> 0:10:34.760 I have with that guy doing what he did was 0:10:35.160 --> 0:10:37.240 the things that he did and said to Natasha to 0:10:37.320 --> 0:10:41.520 like carry his existence on the beach on Um, Like 0:10:41.640 --> 0:10:44.719 he was gaslighting, he was lying, he was just kind 0:10:44.720 --> 0:10:47.800 of doing whatever he needed to do. Uh, and then 0:10:47.840 --> 0:10:50.800 his girl showed up, and then all of a sudden 0:10:51.120 --> 0:10:53.720 he's like saying, how annoying this other girl was, And 0:10:53.720 --> 0:10:59.160 it's just like so so so. Scheming is bad, but 0:10:59.200 --> 0:11:01.280 it's not the word thing. And I think the worst 0:11:01.320 --> 0:11:05.960 thing is gaslighting and manipulating and being a jerk to 0:11:06.040 --> 0:11:08.480 someone just so you can eventually get to the point 0:11:08.559 --> 0:11:13.360 where the person that you were scheming with is showing up. Yeah, 0:11:13.440 --> 0:11:15.760 it's like, listen, there is an element of a game 0:11:15.760 --> 0:11:19.400 in Bachelor in Paradise. It's a reality television show. You know, 0:11:19.520 --> 0:11:22.800 it's very rare, real and raw. But of course, like 0:11:22.920 --> 0:11:26.199 there's producers and there's cameras, so like there's gonna be 0:11:26.280 --> 0:11:28.120 people that try to play the game, but like to, 0:11:28.679 --> 0:11:31.480 like you said, manipulate Natasha like that, dude, go to 0:11:31.559 --> 0:11:33.280 hell if you're going to do that, come on, bro, 0:11:33.400 --> 0:11:36.600 like and you know, he issued an apology, which is great, 0:11:36.679 --> 0:11:39.160 and I think, you know, people should give him the 0:11:39.200 --> 0:11:41.800 benefit of doubt. With the apology, people learn, people grow 0:11:42.440 --> 0:11:46.040 um And he obviously has to apologize to Natasha first 0:11:46.040 --> 0:11:49.319 and foremost, and I hope he has already done that privately. 0:11:49.960 --> 0:11:52.440 But what makes me very happy is, of course the 0:11:52.480 --> 0:11:56.520 internet uh stays undefeated because now Natasha pretty sure has 0:11:56.559 --> 0:12:00.360 like eighty thousand more followers than Brendan, which is a 0:12:00.480 --> 0:12:04.360 hundred thousand more followers. He started off Paradise like three fifty. 0:12:04.440 --> 0:12:06.600 I think he's down to two fifty. Now. I want 0:12:06.600 --> 0:12:08.120 to say this, I want to I want to help 0:12:08.559 --> 0:12:13.120 because I haven't talked to anyone about this, just to 0:12:13.160 --> 0:12:15.600 help help me put it into perspective. And I just 0:12:15.640 --> 0:12:17.920 think like a conversation about this would be interesting. So 0:12:19.400 --> 0:12:22.800 imagine going on to a reality television show as we 0:12:22.840 --> 0:12:28.800 did many times, um and expecting some sort of like 0:12:29.000 --> 0:12:33.400 financial benefit to come from it, and then going on 0:12:33.400 --> 0:12:37.920 that show and realizing every second that you're on that show, 0:12:38.320 --> 0:12:41.319 you're actually losing a lot of money. You know what 0:12:43.480 --> 0:12:48.559 that is. And I think that he's been pioneering this 0:12:48.720 --> 0:12:53.080 moving forward, like because everyone thinks there's no such thing 0:12:53.120 --> 0:12:55.480 as bad press, right, like screen time is screen time. 0:12:55.480 --> 0:12:57.079 There's no such thing as bad screen time. You look 0:12:57.080 --> 0:12:59.880 back to like even the most recent season, like Victoria 0:13:00.160 --> 0:13:04.199 l the Queen, she was insufferable, but a lot of 0:13:04.240 --> 0:13:05.599 people are like, oh, well, she had a lot of 0:13:05.640 --> 0:13:09.800 screen time before she got sent home. This Brendan scenario, 0:13:09.840 --> 0:13:13.280 Brendan Piper scenario is setting a precedent for showing everyone 0:13:13.360 --> 0:13:18.000 that like there actually really is a negative like connotation 0:13:18.160 --> 0:13:23.080 and and and repercussions too going into something like Bachelor Paradise, Bachelorette, 0:13:23.480 --> 0:13:27.000 whatever it is, and if you act poorly, people will 0:13:27.679 --> 0:13:30.600 make you pay the financial price of Like now you're 0:13:30.600 --> 0:13:32.439 not gonna get as many brand deals. You're gonna be 0:13:32.520 --> 0:13:35.600 labeled as this guy, this person. Brands are gonna kind 0:13:35.600 --> 0:13:37.920 of like, you know, have a six ft poll before 0:13:37.920 --> 0:13:40.280 they even talk to you. So I mean, I don't 0:13:40.320 --> 0:13:43.560 envy the guy. I've never seen this happen before. Granted 0:13:43.559 --> 0:13:45.440 I'm a newbie to all this kind of stuff, but 0:13:45.480 --> 0:13:48.200 like you think, you go on TV for whatever reason, 0:13:48.280 --> 0:13:50.760 for however amount of time you're on TV for one 0:13:50.800 --> 0:13:54.040 second or a hundred seconds, you're gonna gain followers. But no, 0:13:54.280 --> 0:13:58.680 these guys are actively losing followers and they're onto TVs 0:13:58.880 --> 0:14:01.520 for hours at a time every single week. Yeah, it's 0:14:01.520 --> 0:14:05.520 an interesting point, I will say. I I really hope 0:14:06.200 --> 0:14:12.040 that people do give Brendan and Piper uh an opportunity 0:14:12.240 --> 0:14:16.559 to apologize, talk about their actions, see if they've grown 0:14:16.600 --> 0:14:19.040 from it, see if they've learned from it, because I 0:14:19.120 --> 0:14:22.960 just I, you know, he made a mistake and she 0:14:23.080 --> 0:14:25.960 made a mistake, and I just I guess I believe 0:14:26.000 --> 0:14:28.200 in second chances. It's actually funny that we're talking about 0:14:28.200 --> 0:14:30.680 this now because I don't know if I should say this, 0:14:30.720 --> 0:14:33.560 but Caitl and I were at dinner and I like 0:14:33.760 --> 0:14:38.160 felt bad for Brendan. I feel bad for both of them. 0:14:38.200 --> 0:14:40.400 I mean, I feel bad most of all for Natasha. 0:14:40.720 --> 0:14:42.720 That's why I feel bad for most of of course, 0:14:42.720 --> 0:14:44.200 But I don't know why. For whatever reason, my heart 0:14:44.200 --> 0:14:46.440 went out to Brendan. I guess maybe I I it's 0:14:46.440 --> 0:14:48.600 just a guy thing, which I hate saying, but like 0:14:49.920 --> 0:14:53.040 he you know, he knows he messed up. He issued 0:14:53.040 --> 0:14:57.920 his apology, and yet I'm sure even beyond on following 0:14:57.960 --> 0:15:01.600 him on social media, people are like messaging and incredibly 0:15:01.680 --> 0:15:04.360 rude things. Um. And not to say that he isn't 0:15:04.400 --> 0:15:08.680 deserve it, but he doesn't deserve very cruel things like I. 0:15:08.680 --> 0:15:10.840 I agree with you in the sense that I do 0:15:10.920 --> 0:15:13.280 feel bad for anybody who gets villainized on these shows, 0:15:13.360 --> 0:15:16.640 because even if they do deserve it, or you know, 0:15:16.680 --> 0:15:20.160 they deserve the edit that they got, um, they don't 0:15:20.200 --> 0:15:23.120 deserve some of the messages and what people say because 0:15:23.120 --> 0:15:26.160 people are really cruel and it sucks. Because that's why 0:15:26.200 --> 0:15:28.960 I never That's why I rarely. I don't know if 0:15:29.000 --> 0:15:31.120 I should say never, because I'm I've probably done before 0:15:31.880 --> 0:15:35.680 respond to trolls on Instagram or Twitter or anything like 0:15:35.720 --> 0:15:38.040 that unless it's in a jokey, funny way, but like 0:15:38.080 --> 0:15:41.000 somebody who's really mean, which is as you know, a 0:15:41.000 --> 0:15:43.400 lot of the Internet and a lot of comments, you know, 0:15:43.440 --> 0:15:46.200 I don't really respond because what I know is that 0:15:46.240 --> 0:15:49.520 if I respond to it fifty people are gonna respond 0:15:49.520 --> 0:15:51.680 to that one person, and it's gonna feel like we're 0:15:51.680 --> 0:15:54.400 all ganging up against this one person. And I never 0:15:54.440 --> 0:15:56.400 like that because I'm like, listen, as much as this 0:15:56.480 --> 0:15:58.480 person sucks, and I hate what they said, and I 0:15:58.520 --> 0:16:00.920 want to respond so badly. I know if I do, 0:16:01.400 --> 0:16:04.040 fifty other people are gonna say much worse things than 0:16:04.080 --> 0:16:06.760 me and say cruel things. And then like, who does 0:16:06.800 --> 0:16:08.560 that make me? Is that make me really better than 0:16:08.560 --> 0:16:10.560 this person? Is that made me feel better? And I 0:16:10.600 --> 0:16:12.400 kind of felt the same way with Chris and Allana, 0:16:12.560 --> 0:16:16.280 because I mean, sure, yeah, Chris, like when he walked 0:16:16.320 --> 0:16:19.120 in and told everybody after you accepted the day card 0:16:19.200 --> 0:16:23.080 that he like announced that everybody, I'm gonna follow my heart. 0:16:23.400 --> 0:16:25.280 I'm gonna do what I want. And it's like, bro, 0:16:25.440 --> 0:16:27.400 you don't need to do this, Like you're only making 0:16:27.440 --> 0:16:29.200 it worse for yourself, Like, get the hell out of here. 0:16:29.760 --> 0:16:32.400 And I I don't agree with the way he's handled himself. 0:16:32.440 --> 0:16:34.480 I don't agree with the way Alana handled herself. I 0:16:34.480 --> 0:16:36.400 didn't like what they did. I think they were scheming, 0:16:36.680 --> 0:16:39.840 but like to go back in there and literally have 0:16:40.280 --> 0:16:44.120 everybody on the beach just go at you tell you 0:16:44.200 --> 0:16:46.480 to pack your bags and get the hell out of here. 0:16:47.080 --> 0:16:49.200 I don't know, I just don't like that feeling of 0:16:49.280 --> 0:16:51.840 everybody ganging up on one person, even if that one 0:16:51.880 --> 0:16:55.080 person isn't the wrong. It's just like a little too 0:16:55.160 --> 0:16:57.320 much for me. And I did not like that moment 0:16:57.320 --> 0:17:00.000 at all. Well, so yeah, I appreciate the pivot, I 0:17:00.000 --> 0:17:01.560 think we should talk about that for a second too. 0:17:02.680 --> 0:17:04.639 I when when I was watching everyone that kind of 0:17:04.680 --> 0:17:08.440 gang up on Chris, and you know, he definitely messed up, 0:17:08.840 --> 0:17:11.240 but I kept trying. I kept putting myself in his shoes, 0:17:11.280 --> 0:17:15.200 and like, imagine being there on the beach. He's probably 0:17:15.200 --> 0:17:17.439 been there for like three days maybe at this point, 0:17:17.680 --> 0:17:19.399 and then all of a sudden, like everyone that's been 0:17:19.400 --> 0:17:21.800 there from the very beginning is like just yelling at 0:17:21.840 --> 0:17:25.639 you and cursing at you, and like everyone is just 0:17:25.880 --> 0:17:29.439 in your face. And I feel like he's already kind 0:17:29.440 --> 0:17:32.280 of like the shy, like introverted guy, and then all 0:17:32.320 --> 0:17:34.400 of a sudden, like everyone is like, get out of here. 0:17:34.480 --> 0:17:39.800 I as someone who personally doesn't try to put a 0:17:39.800 --> 0:17:42.359 lot of stock into what people say, like there's no 0:17:42.480 --> 0:17:45.560 denying that that would be such a hard thing to 0:17:45.840 --> 0:17:49.560 deal with, and I felt bad for him too when 0:17:49.600 --> 0:17:53.359 he went back to the Lanna uh and Uh. He 0:17:53.480 --> 0:17:55.560 was like, well, you know, would you leave with me? 0:17:56.080 --> 0:17:59.119 She's like, Chris, I've been here for a day. And 0:17:59.160 --> 0:18:00.920 I was like, oh no, it's definitely. She does not 0:18:01.000 --> 0:18:02.480 want to be with him. She just wants to stay 0:18:02.480 --> 0:18:05.240 in Paradise. So I just felt bad for him. That's 0:18:05.240 --> 0:18:06.879 actually I'm glad you bring that up because I remember 0:18:06.920 --> 0:18:09.520 watching that part two where I would feel like he 0:18:09.840 --> 0:18:13.480 shot himself in the foot by ditching Jasena and going 0:18:13.520 --> 0:18:15.840 for Lana, and then he shot himself in his other 0:18:15.880 --> 0:18:19.200 foot when he told Alanna that he was gonna leave, Like, 0:18:19.600 --> 0:18:22.280 if you're gonna if you're gonna jump ship to another ship, 0:18:23.440 --> 0:18:26.439 stay on that ship. You know, like you've already jumped 0:18:26.440 --> 0:18:30.440 off the first ship. Everyone is outcasting you. The very 0:18:30.640 --> 0:18:34.040 least thing you could do is just like ride out 0:18:34.080 --> 0:18:36.840 that other ship that you just gave up everything else 0:18:36.880 --> 0:18:40.040 for to be on that. That actually frustrated me, and 0:18:40.160 --> 0:18:41.920 I don't again, I don't think he deserves any hate 0:18:41.920 --> 0:18:44.480 that he's getting. But I do think what Chris should 0:18:44.480 --> 0:18:48.199 have done was say, listen, I've already my eggs are 0:18:48.240 --> 0:18:50.719 an a Launa's basket, you know, like I gave up 0:18:50.760 --> 0:18:53.480 everything that I had with Gusena to give a shot 0:18:53.680 --> 0:18:55.919 with Alanna, and then all of a sudden, he's like, no, 0:18:56.040 --> 0:19:00.760 I need to leave the beach. And that that proves 0:19:00.800 --> 0:19:03.080 to me that he didn't know what the heck he 0:19:03.160 --> 0:19:05.760 was doing, you know, Yeah, I just think he was 0:19:05.800 --> 0:19:07.680 so overwhelmed in the moment he didn't know what the 0:19:07.760 --> 0:19:11.320 hell to do. And you're right, as it makes it. 0:19:11.840 --> 0:19:14.679 It makes me feel bad for Chris, you know. And 0:19:15.680 --> 0:19:18.120 even though he did scheme and he wasn't the wrong 0:19:18.280 --> 0:19:23.000 and he obviously lied. Um, it just it It makes 0:19:23.000 --> 0:19:25.119 me feel bad when you go back and watch it 0:19:25.200 --> 0:19:29.719 and literally, like everybody, it's just overly mean to him, 0:19:29.880 --> 0:19:32.919 you know. And and so you have every right, like 0:19:33.000 --> 0:19:35.199 Jena has every right to be piste off at Chris 0:19:35.240 --> 0:19:38.240 because he lied to her and he led her on 0:19:38.520 --> 0:19:41.600 and he completely flipped a switch. And so I get 0:19:41.640 --> 0:19:43.440 why people would want to have want to have just 0:19:43.520 --> 0:19:47.080 Senda's back, and I completely understand that, and I want 0:19:47.119 --> 0:19:50.919 them to have just send you back. But to go 0:19:51.080 --> 0:19:54.639 to the extreme of literally yelling at this guy and 0:19:54.720 --> 0:19:57.000 screaming at him to get the hell off the beach 0:19:57.080 --> 0:19:59.760 and pack his bags. It's like, okay, can can we 0:19:59.840 --> 0:20:01.679 not being in high school for three seconds? Like I 0:20:01.720 --> 0:20:04.080 know that he was in high school, but to lower 0:20:04.119 --> 0:20:07.320 yourself to those standards. So am I supposed to root 0:20:07.320 --> 0:20:10.879 for you? Now? I mean, I just I don't know. 0:20:11.080 --> 0:20:13.080 It just didn't. It wasn't a good feeling for me 0:20:13.160 --> 0:20:15.520 watching that when the thing too with it. I think 0:20:15.640 --> 0:20:17.439 this is maybe why we're we have such like a 0:20:17.520 --> 0:20:20.680 visceral reaction to it. Is because neither of us could 0:20:20.720 --> 0:20:24.720 imagine being on like the giving side of that type 0:20:24.720 --> 0:20:27.040 of argument, you know, like you and I never would 0:20:27.080 --> 0:20:30.600 have gone in someone's face and been like, leave the beach. 0:20:30.800 --> 0:20:35.240 Otherwise I don't know, something will, something painful will fall 0:20:35.320 --> 0:20:37.920 upon you, like yeah, I never would would make someone 0:20:37.960 --> 0:20:42.439 do that, And I think I don't know what it is. 0:20:42.480 --> 0:20:44.920 Maybe by the season of Paradise, tempers are high, like 0:20:45.480 --> 0:20:47.560 maybe just send you did a really good job of 0:20:47.600 --> 0:20:49.800 having everyone kind of jump into her camp. Well, I 0:20:49.840 --> 0:20:51.720 don't think it was just saying you. I think Chris 0:20:51.920 --> 0:20:54.680 did bring it upon himself, like it was Chris's fall. 0:20:54.920 --> 0:20:57.320 I agree. But but through the two seasons of parais 0:20:57.359 --> 0:20:59.399 I've been on I don't think there's ever been a cast, 0:20:59.800 --> 0:21:04.359 a collective cast, that would have like reigined like the 0:21:04.480 --> 0:21:09.960 Maelstrom upon anyone for anything like they did on Chris, 0:21:10.080 --> 0:21:12.360 you know what I mean. So it's like that's that's 0:21:12.440 --> 0:21:14.040 kind of why I'm a little like irked by it 0:21:14.080 --> 0:21:17.200 because having been through that scenario many times that there's 0:21:17.240 --> 0:21:22.520 never been that much like bigger against anything. Ever, no 0:21:22.520 --> 0:21:25.000 one's cared that much ever until this passion well, I 0:21:25.040 --> 0:21:29.400 mean it, uh the wasn't there a fight like between 0:21:29.520 --> 0:21:33.240 Jordan's and somebody else, like a fist fight. Yeah, Jordan 0:21:33.400 --> 0:21:37.040 and um uh I can't remember his name, but yes 0:21:37.080 --> 0:21:39.760 they fought. But even after that fight, like yeah, if 0:21:39.760 --> 0:21:41.720 we wanted to break them up, But then afterwards, like 0:21:41.800 --> 0:21:43.600 everyone on the beach was like we want everyone to 0:21:43.640 --> 0:21:45.159 be friends, like there's no reason for us all to 0:21:45.160 --> 0:21:46.800 be angry at each other. Like no one was being 0:21:46.800 --> 0:21:48.680 like Jordan, get off the beach, dude, you're getting in 0:21:48.720 --> 0:21:50.919 fights you don't Christian was his name. I'm sorry for 0:21:51.160 --> 0:21:55.320 misremembering that. No, I mean, yes, eventually they found their 0:21:55.320 --> 0:21:58.440 way out, but it wasn't like us banding together like 0:21:58.520 --> 0:22:01.719 voting someone off the island. I remember one time on 0:22:02.400 --> 0:22:07.280 season three, Josh Murray, Like, I remember there was things 0:22:07.280 --> 0:22:09.439 going around about Josh Murray because he was dating a 0:22:09.440 --> 0:22:11.320 man to stand at the time, and then he like 0:22:11.880 --> 0:22:15.520 he he was he collected everybody, and he was the 0:22:15.520 --> 0:22:17.160 one who was like, if anybody's got something to say, 0:22:17.160 --> 0:22:19.720 say to me now, like I've been hearing all these things. 0:22:19.960 --> 0:22:22.120 That was the only time, But obviously the roles were 0:22:22.119 --> 0:22:24.159 reversed because it wasn't a bunch of people ganging up 0:22:24.160 --> 0:22:26.960 on one person. Was one person collecting everybody and being like, 0:22:27.080 --> 0:22:28.960 I want to talk to everyone at the same time. 0:22:29.359 --> 0:22:32.480 So I agree with you, Like I just anytime it's 0:22:32.520 --> 0:22:35.360 like eight against one, I'm like, Okay, I he might 0:22:35.359 --> 0:22:37.679 be in the wrong, but I feel uncomfortable watching this. 0:22:37.760 --> 0:22:40.359 So that's the feeling I got. But of course I 0:22:40.359 --> 0:22:43.040 hope to send you, you know, I want her to 0:22:43.040 --> 0:22:45.119 find love. I'm glad that she's staying in Paradise. I 0:22:45.119 --> 0:22:48.480 hope things work out for her. Obviously, Natasha I'm really 0:22:48.560 --> 0:22:51.239 rooting for. I'm very happy that Natasha is, you know, 0:22:51.800 --> 0:22:55.040 gaining so many followers on Instagram throughout this entire time, 0:22:55.080 --> 0:22:58.240 because it's really funny and also she's just a great 0:22:58.240 --> 0:23:00.000 person who I want to support, So I'm glad people 0:23:00.040 --> 0:23:02.200 are following her. She Actually I remember I was talking 0:23:02.200 --> 0:23:05.600 to Ashley about this. She on a podcast a few 0:23:05.600 --> 0:23:08.960 months ago. Uh somebody mentioned she apparently was talking about 0:23:09.000 --> 0:23:12.040 Ashley and I and saying that we were twin flames, 0:23:12.400 --> 0:23:14.399 and she was just saying some really nice things about us, 0:23:14.440 --> 0:23:16.240 and and I've you know, I've met her a couple 0:23:16.240 --> 0:23:18.600 of times and she's great. So I'm really glad Natasha 0:23:18.640 --> 0:23:20.639 is being supported through this time, you know. On that 0:23:20.680 --> 0:23:23.080 note to actually, my brother at his wedding, during his 0:23:23.160 --> 0:23:27.560 vows said that him and his wife, Ashley aren't twin flames. Okay, 0:23:27.720 --> 0:23:30.679 there go a little bit of full circle. Um, we 0:23:30.720 --> 0:23:32.560 are going to take a quick break before we get 0:23:32.600 --> 0:23:35.720 to our guest, Hannah Burner. But before we get there, 0:23:36.320 --> 0:23:39.040 I want to say one more thing about Paradise, something 0:23:39.040 --> 0:23:41.439 that I've really enjoyed and I didn't expect to enjoy. 0:23:41.760 --> 0:23:45.040 In fact, I am a little upset with myself for 0:23:45.680 --> 0:23:52.400 going into this with the wrong interpretation. Kenny has been 0:23:52.400 --> 0:23:57.800 an absolute dream. He has been the coolest, nicest, funniest, 0:23:58.000 --> 0:24:01.280 hottest guy on the beach, and it's I've never had 0:24:01.280 --> 0:24:04.160 like ill feelings towards him, but I was indifferent towards him, 0:24:04.440 --> 0:24:08.200 especially after his he'son a bachelorette but he has just 0:24:08.240 --> 0:24:11.320 to absolutely blow me away. He's so cool, he's so nice, 0:24:11.400 --> 0:24:14.600 he's like so composed and mature, and he's very hot. 0:24:15.400 --> 0:24:18.600 Um and I just want to say that, so so yeah, 0:24:19.080 --> 0:24:21.040 So Kenny, if you're listening to this, me and Jared, 0:24:21.119 --> 0:24:23.560 I just want to say thank you for being just 0:24:23.600 --> 0:24:26.920 like the cool. Another guy that I think is really 0:24:26.960 --> 0:24:30.119 cool throughout this entire situation, Ivan, He doesn't get his 0:24:30.200 --> 0:24:33.040 love love as he should. I think I like Havan 0:24:33.080 --> 0:24:35.280 a lot. I agree, I agree. I think the only 0:24:35.280 --> 0:24:37.199 reason I bring up Kenny is just because Kenny's kind 0:24:37.200 --> 0:24:38.680 of been in the mix a little bit more. Ivan 0:24:38.760 --> 0:24:40.679 was like in it early on. He's kind of just 0:24:40.720 --> 0:24:43.960 been a little neutral ever since. But I want to, like, 0:24:44.400 --> 0:24:47.719 I don't want Ivan to get lost right right, He's 0:24:47.760 --> 0:24:49.280 not gonna get lost in the mix, at least on 0:24:49.320 --> 0:24:52.359 help I suck a dating. Ivan is always lay up 0:24:52.359 --> 0:24:54.040 there in our hearts. Anyways, I'm sorry I tried to 0:24:54.040 --> 0:24:56.560 add that little bit in Kenny, if you're listening to this, 0:24:56.680 --> 0:24:59.200 I don't know why, what what you're doing wasting your time, Kenny. 0:24:59.200 --> 0:25:01.560 If you're listening to this, light into Dean's d m 0:25:01.680 --> 0:25:05.160 S because you'll make his life. Well, yeah, that's funny. 0:25:05.160 --> 0:25:07.960 I've been thinking about signing into his, but just to 0:25:07.960 --> 0:25:10.840 be friends, you know, nothing more fully platonic. Maybe you 0:25:11.000 --> 0:25:13.760 go out and play some some naked volleyball together. I 0:25:14.359 --> 0:25:17.760 don't know, Klin might have some competition. Yeah, I'm a 0:25:17.800 --> 0:25:20.199 sucker for a guy with tattoos. That's really all it is. Anyways, 0:25:20.240 --> 0:25:22.159 I'm gonna get I'm gonna get out of here before 0:25:22.160 --> 0:25:23.960 we see anything else, So stick around through the break. 0:25:23.960 --> 0:25:28.000 We're gonna have Hannah Burner from um Summer House coming 0:25:28.080 --> 0:25:40.560 up next after that? What's going on? Everyone? Welcome back 0:25:40.600 --> 0:25:44.000 to help I suck at dating. We are joined by 0:25:44.000 --> 0:25:49.240 the one, the only, the hilarious Hannah Burner from Summer House. Hannah, 0:25:49.240 --> 0:25:51.600 how are you thanks for having me? Guys, I'm ready 0:25:51.600 --> 0:25:56.040 to talk some serious about love. Great question. I know 0:25:56.119 --> 0:25:57.960 you're not returning to the next season of Summer House. 0:25:58.000 --> 0:26:01.960 Do you hate it when people say Hannah from Summer House? No, No, 0:26:02.359 --> 0:26:04.960 because I was from Summer House. It's also like when 0:26:04.960 --> 0:26:08.000 people recognize me those like Summer House, and it's like, 0:26:08.400 --> 0:26:10.480 it's a part of who I am, It's part of 0:26:10.480 --> 0:26:13.800 my journey. You want to know what's going to be 0:26:13.800 --> 0:26:16.000 great though in ten years, when your journey has evolved 0:26:16.040 --> 0:26:19.480 so greatly that people will forget entirely about the fact 0:26:19.480 --> 0:26:21.800 that you were on four years of Summer House. Well, 0:26:21.840 --> 0:26:24.720 it's funny. The whole concept of people forgetting is scary, 0:26:24.920 --> 0:26:27.359 but there's also like a beautifulness about it, where like 0:26:27.720 --> 0:26:30.680 something bad happens during the season, people forget very quick, 0:26:30.840 --> 0:26:34.480 or like even when something good happens, people forget. Um, 0:26:34.680 --> 0:26:36.639 you have to remember that that everything is always changing. 0:26:36.680 --> 0:26:38.560 I think that's how you survive in this industry because 0:26:38.600 --> 0:26:41.240 it's crazy town. I guess I guess I might have 0:26:41.400 --> 0:26:43.679 spoke a little bit. What I meant was people remember 0:26:43.720 --> 0:26:46.840 you for greater things rather than your appearance on Summer 0:26:46.840 --> 0:26:50.360 House for a few seasons. Thanks sounding, I appreciate you. Yes, 0:26:50.480 --> 0:26:52.720 and Okay, So for the record, for the listeners out there, 0:26:53.040 --> 0:26:55.560 Hanna and I are not strangers. We met about a 0:26:55.600 --> 0:26:58.760 week ago in New York. We go way back. We 0:26:58.880 --> 0:27:00.879 go way back. Yes, that's right. We took a tennis 0:27:00.960 --> 0:27:05.679 lesson together. Um, and so the reason for that Caitlin 0:27:05.680 --> 0:27:08.280 obviously is a big tennis fan, and we were out 0:27:08.320 --> 0:27:11.640 there with Wilson. And Hannah is a collegiate athlete who 0:27:11.640 --> 0:27:14.400 played tennis in college, so she of course was out 0:27:14.400 --> 0:27:17.399 there with Wilson. But I gotta ask. So you left 0:27:17.400 --> 0:27:19.280 early because you had to fly too. I think it 0:27:19.280 --> 0:27:22.560 was Kansas City for a stand up comedy show. How 0:27:22.600 --> 0:27:26.400 did that go? It went great? Amazing barbecue. Um real 0:27:26.480 --> 0:27:29.800 quick though, Jared um Dean showed up to this Wilson 0:27:29.840 --> 0:27:32.919 event wearing flip flops? Is this something that? Is this 0:27:33.320 --> 0:27:36.040 the handle type of guy that if he lived in 0:27:36.880 --> 0:27:41.639 Buffalo in February, he'd be wearing flip flops outside because 0:27:41.640 --> 0:27:44.119 it's like feet don't get hold I'm like, get at it. 0:27:44.280 --> 0:27:46.280 It was like I thought this was a character they 0:27:46.280 --> 0:27:49.399 were putting together on you know, The Bachelor, But no, 0:27:49.560 --> 0:27:52.360 that's just real. He couldn't. He was ready to climb something. 0:27:52.520 --> 0:27:55.159 He was ready to like hike, Oh yeah, he was. 0:27:55.320 --> 0:27:57.560 He was ready to just stroll on the beach. That's 0:27:57.560 --> 0:28:00.480 what he was doing. Very topical. So Kaylen and I 0:28:00.480 --> 0:28:02.600 are staying in this hotel in Italy right now, and 0:28:02.640 --> 0:28:04.800 in the hotels are like a five star Michelin restaurant 0:28:05.080 --> 0:28:07.240 and we go up to check in for a reservation 0:28:07.800 --> 0:28:11.159 and I'm wearing flip flops and I Goes goes, you 0:28:11.200 --> 0:28:13.080 can't come in here with flip flops, and I was like, 0:28:13.200 --> 0:28:15.240 these are literally the only shoes that I have with me, 0:28:15.320 --> 0:28:17.440 Like I I have, I can come and barefoot. Would 0:28:17.440 --> 0:28:19.359 that be better for you? And they like pull the 0:28:19.400 --> 0:28:22.639 manager over and they're like, Okay, they let me come in, fortunately, 0:28:22.720 --> 0:28:25.479 but they were like very not happy about it. You're like, 0:28:25.480 --> 0:28:29.040 these are high quality, versatile flip flops. These are sixty 0:28:29.080 --> 0:28:33.960 dollar Tivas. Okay, but yeah, stand up has been kind 0:28:33.960 --> 0:28:38.480 of my like healing process through like being on reality TV. 0:28:38.720 --> 0:28:41.400 Reality TV is obviously great, but people see you, you know, 0:28:41.480 --> 0:28:43.800 through such a lens and behind the screen, and stand 0:28:43.840 --> 0:28:45.760 up is very like raw. I think that's why we 0:28:45.880 --> 0:28:49.040 love podcasts to reality TV people, because you get to 0:28:49.120 --> 0:28:52.280 just like be very outgoing and raw and let people 0:28:52.480 --> 0:28:54.720 see a lot of different sides to you. Yeah, you 0:28:54.760 --> 0:28:56.360 get to be the center of attention, which is what 0:28:56.440 --> 0:28:57.840 we all love. I mean, I just want to be 0:28:57.920 --> 0:29:01.200 heard as many different places. Story I don't want to 0:29:01.200 --> 0:29:05.040 tell yeah, so and stand up you just like it's 0:29:05.040 --> 0:29:07.440 all about like telling the truth and and calling people 0:29:07.440 --> 0:29:09.800 out on the truth and just saying the things people 0:29:09.800 --> 0:29:12.960 are afraid to say. So I've I've been really enjoying 0:29:13.320 --> 0:29:16.000 having that outlet. Well, Hannah, I can't help but notice 0:29:16.560 --> 0:29:18.560 you have an engagement ring on your hand, and I 0:29:18.640 --> 0:29:20.520 heard that you just got engaged. So first of all, 0:29:20.520 --> 0:29:23.040 congratulations became the podcast and you were like, I'm ready 0:29:23.080 --> 0:29:26.800 to talk some about love, So I hope you're happy. 0:29:28.320 --> 0:29:32.000 It's funny because I was twenty nine years old in 0:29:32.000 --> 0:29:35.320 this room when Quarantine first hit, living with my parents, 0:29:35.640 --> 0:29:38.320 very single. I was like face timing with this like 0:29:38.440 --> 0:29:41.880 former football guy who was partying in Miami every night. 0:29:42.120 --> 0:29:44.000 And then I was like still talking to the guy 0:29:44.120 --> 0:29:46.280 who I was on a reality TV show with which 0:29:46.320 --> 0:29:48.680 like I knew was not going to end well, but 0:29:49.040 --> 0:29:51.840 we were going to see what was gonna happen um. 0:29:51.920 --> 0:29:54.200 And then this guy d mned me. We went on 0:29:54.280 --> 0:29:56.760 a date and it all happened, and then six months 0:29:56.800 --> 0:30:00.160 I was engaged. So all my material, my end of 0:30:00.240 --> 0:30:02.520 material was about being single, and then I got engaged 0:30:02.520 --> 0:30:03.840 in six months, and then I have to be like 0:30:04.800 --> 0:30:06.880 I know about love when it's like you're like my 0:30:06.960 --> 0:30:11.200 career is over. My mom actually pulled me aside once. 0:30:11.240 --> 0:30:12.680 She was like, I know you're used to being like 0:30:12.720 --> 0:30:16.120 the single, outgoing wild whatever, but it's like you're not 0:30:16.200 --> 0:30:20.120 that person anymore. Like you're evolving and you can't keep 0:30:20.200 --> 0:30:24.000 making tweets about how guys are garbage? You know? Was 0:30:24.040 --> 0:30:29.720 that scary for you? Um, it's scary because I wasn't 0:30:29.720 --> 0:30:33.640 anticipating getting married. I never thought about marriage that month 0:30:33.760 --> 0:30:35.640 that much. I wasn'tforced to on the show be like, 0:30:35.880 --> 0:30:38.080 can you see yourself being living the rest of your 0:30:38.120 --> 0:30:39.920 life with this person? Like I was there, You're like, 0:30:40.000 --> 0:30:42.920 I don't know where I'm gonna wake up tomorrow. Okay, 0:30:43.040 --> 0:30:47.440 can focus on that first. I was very career obsessed. Also, 0:30:47.560 --> 0:30:51.800 like Bravo love single Hannah. I love flirting, and I 0:30:51.840 --> 0:30:55.400 loved kind of twist, like changing the narrative where like 0:30:55.480 --> 0:30:59.360 girls could you know, start a conversation and like you 0:30:59.360 --> 0:31:01.200 don't have to wait round for guys and you could 0:31:01.480 --> 0:31:03.600 hook up with a mail model if you want and 0:31:03.960 --> 0:31:06.280 do your thing. So this was kind of off brand 0:31:06.360 --> 0:31:09.680 for for me to get engaged. Um, it was terrible 0:31:09.720 --> 0:31:13.480 for my brand. It was super bad for my brand. Right, So, 0:31:13.600 --> 0:31:16.040 how how your jokes shifted on the on the stand 0:31:16.080 --> 0:31:19.920 up for it then, so I started making jokes about, well, 0:31:19.960 --> 0:31:23.320 the engagement process. You guys, you're not engaged or dean, 0:31:23.400 --> 0:31:28.080 are you. I'm very much committed to my girlfriend. Yeah, okay, 0:31:28.200 --> 0:31:31.400 this guy just loves living in a cloud of mystery. 0:31:32.040 --> 0:31:33.840 I didn't mean to put you on the spot. I 0:31:33.880 --> 0:31:38.040 just didn't want to get its happened every single week. 0:31:39.720 --> 0:31:42.640 He's like, we are in a beautiful connected soul and 0:31:42.880 --> 0:31:46.160 don't worry about it. Um, but being engaged. I feel 0:31:46.160 --> 0:31:47.959 like it's a kind of old school thing where like 0:31:48.360 --> 0:31:49.920 one day a guy is supposed to just get on 0:31:49.960 --> 0:31:51.880 his knee and ask you to spend the rest of 0:31:51.880 --> 0:31:53.600 your life with him, and they make it like it's 0:31:53.600 --> 0:31:57.640 a romantic, beautiful surprise, when like, I don't think engagements 0:31:57.680 --> 0:32:00.800 are actually in the real life like that you have 0:32:00.880 --> 0:32:04.600 to talk out. You have to be like, is this 0:32:04.880 --> 0:32:06.080 do I want to do this for the rest of 0:32:06.080 --> 0:32:08.720 my life? Guys don't know what ring you want? You 0:32:08.720 --> 0:32:10.760 have to figure out what ring you want. You have 0:32:10.840 --> 0:32:14.160 to hint them what ring you want. You Also, there's 0:32:14.200 --> 0:32:17.960 just so many things that aren't romantic about it. And 0:32:18.400 --> 0:32:21.120 then also joking about not knowing any this guy outside 0:32:21.120 --> 0:32:24.080 of global pandemic, Like that's when I met him. So 0:32:24.120 --> 0:32:26.000 I'm like, what if I go to a restaurant with 0:32:26.080 --> 0:32:28.360 him and people are singing Happy Birthday and he like 0:32:28.440 --> 0:32:31.160 joins in, Like this could be really bad. This could 0:32:31.160 --> 0:32:34.120 be detrimental to our relationship. Yeah, exactly, what if this 0:32:34.200 --> 0:32:36.520 is the kind of guy that claps on the airplane? Exactly? 0:32:38.360 --> 0:32:40.720 So I was worried about that, and then I joke 0:32:40.800 --> 0:32:45.680 about him. He's forty five. He's the oldest guy I've 0:32:45.720 --> 0:32:48.800 ever been with you. You see, just judging what we're 0:32:48.800 --> 0:32:50.440 seeing on TV, it seems like you like to ski 0:32:50.520 --> 0:32:54.200 a little older. Well, yeah, I guess I have, but 0:32:54.280 --> 0:32:56.360 I've never gone forty five. Like, I've never was one 0:32:56.360 --> 0:32:58.560 of those girls who was, you know, obsessed with his 0:32:58.640 --> 0:33:03.720 zaddi um. But then, but I've always liked boys, that's 0:33:03.760 --> 0:33:07.880 been consistent with me. But I found a retired boy. 0:33:08.120 --> 0:33:12.880 So yeah, that's what you gotta go for. The boys excited. Well, 0:33:13.080 --> 0:33:15.000 that's the thing, like, because the F boys. The F 0:33:15.120 --> 0:33:18.920 boy in his twenties maybe early third, you know, early thirties, 0:33:19.160 --> 0:33:21.640 and then starts changing his ways in his late thirties, 0:33:21.680 --> 0:33:25.240 late thirties so you got him in his peak post 0:33:25.320 --> 0:33:28.760 f boy years. He just became exhausted and needed someone 0:33:28.800 --> 0:33:31.000 to save him. But I joke like, I don't know 0:33:31.000 --> 0:33:32.360 if I met him when he was thirty that it 0:33:32.360 --> 0:33:34.520 would have worked out. But now it's like he's not 0:33:34.600 --> 0:33:36.560 chasing women on the streets anymore. He's on the verge 0:33:36.560 --> 0:33:40.000 of arthritis. So he just fell into my hands. I 0:33:40.040 --> 0:33:41.920 don't I don't want to be that guy. But if 0:33:41.960 --> 0:33:43.280 you met him when you were thirty, you would have 0:33:43.280 --> 0:33:45.840 been twelve years old, so it definitely wouldn't worked at 0:33:46.400 --> 0:33:48.360 very valid point. But I feel like if we were 0:33:48.400 --> 0:33:51.040 the same age, I mean, guys mature later. But there's 0:33:51.040 --> 0:33:53.480 two kinds of relationships. Like my parents met early and 0:33:53.520 --> 0:33:56.320 they really like grew up together. Where I've kind of 0:33:56.320 --> 0:33:59.640 found this like fully cooked man, where like the Xes 0:33:59.680 --> 0:34:01.240 did all the work for me and I just have 0:34:01.320 --> 0:34:04.080 to make a couple of edits, you know. Yeah, Yeah, 0:34:04.680 --> 0:34:07.520 that's I mean, that's in a in a wonderful way, 0:34:07.560 --> 0:34:09.239 that's a really cool way of looking at it. I 0:34:09.200 --> 0:34:11.040 feel agree. So I gotta ask what was it about 0:34:11.160 --> 0:34:14.080 him specifically that kind of made you so certain about it? 0:34:14.360 --> 0:34:16.200 I love that you guys are so into love. It's 0:34:16.280 --> 0:34:19.880 it's so adorable. Well, you know the title of the podcast, 0:34:22.800 --> 0:34:26.480 it's imperfect, it's imperfectly perfect, the journey of love. I 0:34:26.520 --> 0:34:30.640 feel like with him, he I really like respected his brain. 0:34:30.800 --> 0:34:32.359 I feel like I'll meet a lot of guys who 0:34:32.600 --> 0:34:35.080 my age, and it's not like they're stupid or anything, 0:34:35.120 --> 0:34:38.600 but I'll just be like, I don't think he's he's 0:34:38.640 --> 0:34:41.160 like trying to improve himself or like, I don't know 0:34:41.200 --> 0:34:44.120 if he's like actually reflected on in life, Like some 0:34:44.160 --> 0:34:46.839 guys have squirrel brains when they're younger. I do think 0:34:46.880 --> 0:34:49.920 guys emotionally mature later. I don't know, IM I just 0:34:49.960 --> 0:34:51.799 insulted you guys right now, I feel not at all. 0:34:51.840 --> 0:34:54.120 I thought you were gonna say. I thought you're gonna say. 0:34:54.160 --> 0:34:56.400 You know, when I meet guys my age, they're not stupid, 0:34:56.800 --> 0:35:02.239 but they're dumb as hell. It's not even intellectually, it's 0:35:02.280 --> 0:35:03.920 more like you can tell they don't want to settle down, 0:35:04.040 --> 0:35:06.640 they don't care to like connect in some ways, and 0:35:06.680 --> 0:35:09.160 that's fine. I was emotionally unavailable too for a while 0:35:09.239 --> 0:35:12.040 to protect myself, so then I'd find other emotionally unavailable 0:35:12.040 --> 0:35:14.880 people and would just be like motion unavailable, which is 0:35:14.960 --> 0:35:18.040 just like a form of protecting yourself and being scared. 0:35:18.280 --> 0:35:20.480 But I met this guy who kind of like I 0:35:20.520 --> 0:35:23.719 think he knew what he wanted, so like a couple 0:35:23.760 --> 0:35:25.879 of weeks in, he was like, yeah, I could see 0:35:25.880 --> 0:35:29.160 myself marrying you. And I like didn't know how to 0:35:29.200 --> 0:35:31.239 handle it because I'm so used to having to play 0:35:31.280 --> 0:35:33.120 it cool and the guy playing it cool, and then 0:35:33.160 --> 0:35:34.600 you have to play a little tricks on each other 0:35:34.600 --> 0:35:39.080 to show you're not that into it until someone gets 0:35:39.120 --> 0:35:41.000 the balls to be like I'm into it. So the 0:35:41.000 --> 0:35:42.680 fact this guy was like, yeah, I'm really into you, 0:35:43.320 --> 0:35:46.239 I was like, that's so hot, just for someone to 0:35:46.320 --> 0:35:49.200 know that they're into someone. And then I got vulnerable 0:35:49.280 --> 0:35:51.600 and I realized, oh my god, I've never been vulnerable, 0:35:51.960 --> 0:35:55.400 Like I'm always the sarcastic, like keeping guests in, like 0:35:55.480 --> 0:35:57.920 you don't really know what's going on with me. I 0:35:58.160 --> 0:35:59.879 grew up with my dad being like, don't like guys 0:35:59.880 --> 0:36:02.719 to stracked you. I just kind of like always had 0:36:02.719 --> 0:36:04.320 a But this guy was like, yeah, I want to 0:36:04.360 --> 0:36:07.319 be with you. And then when you were secure enough 0:36:07.360 --> 0:36:09.839 in yourself you don't push it away and you're like 0:36:10.200 --> 0:36:14.040 that's hot. That he sees something in me that he likes. 0:36:14.560 --> 0:36:16.719 And then with him, he was just very interesting, like 0:36:16.880 --> 0:36:20.520 he's traveled the world, he's he speaks a lot of languages. 0:36:21.040 --> 0:36:24.759 He's it's very very funny, with the same dark sense 0:36:24.800 --> 0:36:30.120 of humor. Um. When we first met, I actually within 0:36:30.160 --> 0:36:32.560 the first five minutes I kind of knew he was 0:36:32.640 --> 0:36:37.879 going to be a good one. Um, I can. I'll 0:36:37.920 --> 0:36:40.040 lead you into the story. I got into the fight 0:36:40.120 --> 0:36:43.239 with my dad. My dad wanted to go golfing and 0:36:43.280 --> 0:36:45.560 his tea time. This is like white people problems, but 0:36:45.560 --> 0:36:48.320 his tea time was literally right when we were about 0:36:48.360 --> 0:36:50.520 to I was about to be dropped off to my 0:36:50.640 --> 0:36:52.960 date with Deaz and I hadn't gone a date in 0:36:52.960 --> 0:36:55.160 like six months. And my dad's like, oh, dropping you 0:36:55.160 --> 0:36:56.799 off thirty minutes early because I have a tea time. 0:36:56.800 --> 0:36:59.440 And I'm like, Dad, I'm trying to find love and 0:36:59.480 --> 0:37:01.240 you and mom have each other and I've been alone 0:37:01.239 --> 0:37:03.279 for six months. He's or whatever. He drops me off, 0:37:03.800 --> 0:37:08.319 and it's like degrees. I'm sweating, shown of worngeanes and 0:37:08.360 --> 0:37:11.440 a piste to my dad And we hadn't thought that 0:37:11.560 --> 0:37:14.560 often in quarantine. But I was not happy, And does 0:37:14.640 --> 0:37:17.839 my fancy picks me up, and I was like, I'm 0:37:17.920 --> 0:37:19.880 so mad at my dad. Like I didn't even pretend 0:37:19.880 --> 0:37:21.400 to like have it together on the first day. I 0:37:21.400 --> 0:37:23.120 was like, I'm so mad at my Dad's so annoying. 0:37:24.200 --> 0:37:25.520 And he looks at me, he goes, at least your 0:37:25.520 --> 0:37:30.160 parents are alive. I mean, that's one way I'm looking 0:37:30.160 --> 0:37:33.240 at it. I just started dying laughing, and I realized 0:37:33.239 --> 0:37:35.640 in that moment, like that was a test, Like if 0:37:35.640 --> 0:37:39.600 I had been like that's not funny, like being over, 0:37:39.960 --> 0:37:42.800 but immediately we just started laughing over his like sick, 0:37:42.920 --> 0:37:46.400 dark humor, and I immediately felt comfortable. Um, So humor 0:37:46.440 --> 0:37:48.480 has a really great way of breaking the ice and 0:37:48.520 --> 0:37:52.959 seeing seeing kind of what level of sick humor you have. Yeah, 0:37:53.040 --> 0:37:55.719 humor really brings us together, I feel, yeah, because it's 0:37:55.760 --> 0:37:59.040 all about like relatability, Like do you think have you 0:37:59.120 --> 0:38:02.200 experienced this and do you have the same reaction? There's 0:38:02.239 --> 0:38:08.160 something visceral but making someone laugh or someone making you laugh, yeah, 0:38:08.200 --> 0:38:12.040 I mean on a date. Yeah, you're so controlled on 0:38:12.040 --> 0:38:13.680 a date trying to say the right things that if 0:38:13.680 --> 0:38:16.280 they could make you laugh, it's almost like an orgasm. 0:38:17.800 --> 0:38:20.160 It's a reaction, you know, something that you can't control, 0:38:20.360 --> 0:38:22.920 and Jared, it's like Jared's We've established it's like an 0:38:22.960 --> 0:38:29.200 orgasm perfectly. I gotta ask, Okay, so you said, now 0:38:29.280 --> 0:38:33.400 that you've clarified that engagements are a proposals are not romantic, 0:38:34.000 --> 0:38:36.440 we gotta ask what was the proposal like between you 0:38:36.520 --> 0:38:39.520 and death? Great question? So he how did you? How 0:38:39.520 --> 0:38:42.600 did you experience it? Well, he would joke that he 0:38:42.640 --> 0:38:44.400 wanted to marry me, so then I would joke and 0:38:44.400 --> 0:38:47.640 I started sending him rings and then he responded like 0:38:47.760 --> 0:38:50.200 got it on it, And I didn't know if he 0:38:50.239 --> 0:38:51.960 was joking or not. So our whole thing was like 0:38:51.960 --> 0:38:56.799 a bit to be honest, and then I got an 0:38:56.800 --> 0:38:58.960 interjector real quick, you're gonna have like five kids one day, 0:38:58.960 --> 0:39:00.839 and he's gonna be like, yeah, let's pump out number six. 0:39:00.840 --> 0:39:03.839 And you could be like, oh, the hilarious joke. This 0:39:03.920 --> 0:39:09.359 is the funniest ongoing prank of all time. Actually, every 0:39:09.400 --> 0:39:11.600 now done, I'm like, is this real? Is he for real? 0:39:12.480 --> 0:39:17.560 Where's the punchhine? No? But he Actually I was at 0:39:17.600 --> 0:39:20.080 my parents house and my dad was talking to him 0:39:20.239 --> 0:39:21.640 in the other room, and then he walked in the 0:39:21.719 --> 0:39:23.640 other room where I could hear him and he said 0:39:23.680 --> 0:39:26.560 to my mom, I said, no, ha ha ha ha ha, 0:39:26.840 --> 0:39:30.120 like joking, And I was like, he's being sarcastic. Has 0:39:30.200 --> 0:39:33.480 just asked him, like for the blessing or whatever they do. 0:39:34.560 --> 0:39:37.160 So I feel like girls know, Like I feel like, 0:39:37.719 --> 0:39:40.759 I mean, with your show, you guys scare the ship 0:39:40.800 --> 0:39:42.239 out of the girls. But I feel like in most 0:39:42.320 --> 0:39:45.759 normal situations, the girl can sense something's going on. I 0:39:46.080 --> 0:39:49.920 found things. Yeah. So also they don't talk about engagements, 0:39:50.000 --> 0:39:52.600 is like most of the time, you know, and if 0:39:52.640 --> 0:39:55.760 you don't know, that's so weird to have to consent 0:39:56.080 --> 0:39:58.960 to spending this your life with someone. It's almost kind 0:39:58.960 --> 0:40:01.680 of messed up. Right. And then also what I think 0:40:01.760 --> 0:40:04.200 is messed up if we're getting here, how like he's 0:40:04.200 --> 0:40:06.560 walking around. I have this this ring on the shiny 0:40:06.600 --> 0:40:08.360 thing he distracted me with, and he's walking around like 0:40:08.400 --> 0:40:10.480 he's single. And I was like I want to. I 0:40:10.520 --> 0:40:11.560 was like, I want to get you a ring and 0:40:11.600 --> 0:40:13.680 he's like, no, they'll look ugly. I'm like, exactly, I 0:40:13.719 --> 0:40:16.719 need people not be into you. I need to a 0:40:16.800 --> 0:40:18.600 ring on it. Make sure everybody knows that you are 0:40:18.680 --> 0:40:23.319 a man. It's very old school. I feel like, but anyway, Yeah, 0:40:23.320 --> 0:40:25.680 it is kind of weird when you think about proposals. 0:40:25.960 --> 0:40:27.560 You're like, oh, you're going to spend the rest of 0:40:27.600 --> 0:40:29.560 your life with me, and it's like, well, I don't 0:40:29.600 --> 0:40:31.680 know what I'm gonna want in twenty years. What if 0:40:31.680 --> 0:40:37.120 I changed my mind? No, it's so weird. And I 0:40:37.160 --> 0:40:41.080 guess because he's older, he kind of knew what he wanted. Um. 0:40:41.120 --> 0:40:43.200 But when I was at summer house, I had just 0:40:43.360 --> 0:40:46.759 met him two weeks before and we were into each other, 0:40:46.800 --> 0:40:48.080 but like, I don't really know the guy, but I 0:40:48.160 --> 0:40:51.759 kept calling him at night and I was would cry. 0:40:51.960 --> 0:40:54.399 We have phone sex, we talked about life, like we 0:40:54.400 --> 0:40:58.320 would go on full journeys from like midnight to four am, 0:40:58.520 --> 0:41:01.239 and then I have to film the next day, very 0:41:01.239 --> 0:41:05.080 sleep deprived. Um, but you guys have seen your significant 0:41:05.080 --> 0:41:09.640 others in the trenches of reality TV pressure, and that's 0:41:09.640 --> 0:41:11.759 like how he met me. And I would argue, I'm 0:41:11.760 --> 0:41:14.440 not a big cry or I'm actually not. I do 0:41:14.560 --> 0:41:16.560 like drama, but I'm not normally the cause of it. 0:41:18.280 --> 0:41:20.000 Part of me was like maybe he saw me at 0:41:20.000 --> 0:41:23.200 this like crazy vulnerable state that he like made him 0:41:23.239 --> 0:41:25.520 fall for me because I a stand up joke. I 0:41:25.560 --> 0:41:27.279 called him every night being like I just fought with 0:41:27.360 --> 0:41:29.520 thirteen people and there's only seven on the cast, and 0:41:29.600 --> 0:41:32.600 he was like, that's wiping material. Like do you guys 0:41:32.719 --> 0:41:36.960 feel like you would have fallen for your significant others 0:41:37.840 --> 0:41:41.399 if you hadn't seen them like crying and being really 0:41:41.520 --> 0:41:44.160 raw or was it just like a more difficult journey 0:41:44.200 --> 0:41:45.840 to get there because you guys had to deal with 0:41:45.920 --> 0:41:49.440 serious drama to get there. I mean, hey, I appreciate 0:41:49.480 --> 0:41:51.520 you turning this around on the host and asking us questions. 0:41:51.520 --> 0:41:56.479 That's phenomenal. I think I think Jared can relate pretty 0:41:56.520 --> 0:41:59.760 heavily to that because you've seen Ashley through the highs 0:41:59.760 --> 0:42:03.279 and those, through a lot of things, and I think 0:42:03.280 --> 0:42:05.880 that not despite all that stuff, but like you found it, 0:42:05.920 --> 0:42:07.120 kind of found the beauty and all of it, and 0:42:07.120 --> 0:42:09.719 you came back to it and realize that's the person 0:42:09.800 --> 0:42:11.319 you live. I think for us, I'm not sure if 0:42:11.360 --> 0:42:14.200 Reality TV helped or heard us. It was just kind 0:42:14.200 --> 0:42:16.800 of there because honestly, you know, we started following in 0:42:16.800 --> 0:42:20.320 a lot with each other, more so off the show 0:42:20.520 --> 0:42:23.640 when like I remember the first time where I saw Ashley, 0:42:23.880 --> 0:42:26.600 you know, with her family and hanging out on her 0:42:26.960 --> 0:42:31.080 you know, environment and feeling comfortable and confident and watching 0:42:31.120 --> 0:42:33.280 football with her, and then that's when I could start 0:42:33.320 --> 0:42:35.839 really picturing her life with her. It wasn't so much 0:42:35.880 --> 0:42:38.960 on the show. So that's really interesting though. Yeah, I 0:42:38.960 --> 0:42:40.799 don't know if it was like the show that was like, oh, 0:42:40.840 --> 0:42:42.879 because you guys went through this crazy thing together, that's 0:42:42.880 --> 0:42:44.600 why you fell in love with the one another. I 0:42:44.600 --> 0:42:45.799 was like, I don't know. I think it was more 0:42:45.840 --> 0:42:48.200 of like the low key type of stuff. But you're right, 0:42:48.239 --> 0:42:54.120 like the show definitely makes you face your your not 0:42:54.160 --> 0:42:56.600 face your fears, but you know, yeah, face your demons 0:42:56.640 --> 0:42:59.080 more that you have to like discuss things that you 0:42:59.120 --> 0:43:01.960 usually wouldn't discuss than normal every day to long. Yeah, 0:43:02.400 --> 0:43:05.760 I joke how like the Bachelor often doesn't work because 0:43:05.800 --> 0:43:08.360 like you're put on a beautiful island with like a 0:43:08.400 --> 0:43:11.680 mandalin player and like it's so romantic, where like relationships 0:43:11.680 --> 0:43:13.319 are actually about the day to day sitting on the 0:43:13.320 --> 0:43:15.920 couch and like also are you good at fighting? Like 0:43:15.960 --> 0:43:18.360 can you put together an ikea couch together? And stuff 0:43:18.520 --> 0:43:23.080 and like very important things. Yes, the mundane. I think 0:43:23.160 --> 0:43:25.840 we're also seeing it specifically in Bachelor these times. I 0:43:25.880 --> 0:43:27.480 don't know if you watched the show, but I think 0:43:27.520 --> 0:43:29.640 there's a lot to be said that people want to 0:43:29.719 --> 0:43:33.120 be in a bachelor relationship, Like I think there are 0:43:33.120 --> 0:43:36.000 a lot of people who prioritize being a bachelor couple 0:43:36.120 --> 0:43:38.920 rather than just a couple. I think that extends further on. 0:43:38.960 --> 0:43:40.319 That just kind of goes along with being in a 0:43:40.360 --> 0:43:43.360 television relationship because there's like a monetary game behind it. 0:43:43.800 --> 0:43:46.239 I'm only focusing on the batchelork Is obviously we're from 0:43:46.239 --> 0:43:50.600 the franchise, and but you're absolutely right, that's all over TV. No, 0:43:50.719 --> 0:43:54.000 I know. It makes me nauseous because like, yeah, I've 0:43:54.040 --> 0:43:56.640 never been in a public relationship. It is like my 0:43:56.680 --> 0:44:00.040 second public relationship. And to have people like betting on 0:44:00.080 --> 0:44:02.600 how long it's gonna last, and to have people like 0:44:02.719 --> 0:44:05.040 straight up judging like who you should be with, Like 0:44:05.600 --> 0:44:08.040 that's it's crazy. And like when I people are mean 0:44:08.080 --> 0:44:10.840 to me online, but when someone's mean to Deaz, I 0:44:10.880 --> 0:44:12.880 get so upset and then I feel like it's my 0:44:12.920 --> 0:44:16.040 fault because I brought him on the show. Like these 0:44:16.080 --> 0:44:18.239 are the stuff that you guys have to deal with 0:44:18.280 --> 0:44:22.120 as reality TV couples. Like people don't understand. I think 0:44:22.160 --> 0:44:25.120 it's hard. I mean, I I agree, but I want 0:44:25.120 --> 0:44:26.759 to come back to something that we talked about when 0:44:26.760 --> 0:44:28.520 we met in New York was you were saying how 0:44:28.960 --> 0:44:30.520 I don't want I don't want overstand my boundaries. But 0:44:30.520 --> 0:44:33.080 you're saying how you're in you know, post reality TV therapy, 0:44:33.200 --> 0:44:34.319 which I think is a good thing, and I think 0:44:34.360 --> 0:44:37.840 we should always advocate for therapy. I think it doesn't 0:44:37.880 --> 0:44:41.759 it's not just the TV couples, it's every TV individual 0:44:41.920 --> 0:44:44.000 because you're put under a certain amount of scrutiny and 0:44:44.280 --> 0:44:45.480 you have to deal with a lot of things that 0:44:45.480 --> 0:44:47.840 you never had to deal with before. So you're saying 0:44:47.840 --> 0:44:52.279 a lot about couples, but I think suppertains to the 0:44:52.320 --> 0:44:55.000 individual as well. Um, and I just want to touch 0:44:55.000 --> 0:44:57.520 on one thing real quick. You were talking about, uh, 0:44:57.600 --> 0:45:01.800 you know, everyone kind of being in the stressful environment 0:45:01.800 --> 0:45:03.560 and being on reality TV and like how could anyone 0:45:03.560 --> 0:45:05.880 love you in that environment? And it's funny because Kalin, 0:45:05.960 --> 0:45:09.520 for instance, Um, she you know, she has been on 0:45:09.560 --> 0:45:12.160 reality t V a couple of times and she was 0:45:12.320 --> 0:45:15.240 very She's very easy to stress out. She's very stress 0:45:15.239 --> 0:45:17.879 double if you will, and she she gets crunched under 0:45:17.920 --> 0:45:21.800 that stress, very very easily, and we constantly talk about 0:45:22.080 --> 0:45:24.080 how much of a dream it would be for both 0:45:24.080 --> 0:45:26.840 of us to go on amazing race together, And in 0:45:26.840 --> 0:45:29.040 the back of my head every single time she says it, 0:45:29.080 --> 0:45:31.920 I'm like, bro, you know how stressed out you get 0:45:31.960 --> 0:45:36.680 about the lesti mundane, insignificant things. I am like terrified 0:45:37.040 --> 0:45:39.040 to go on another TV show with you wh we're 0:45:39.080 --> 0:45:40.879 racing around the world. So I see your point where 0:45:40.880 --> 0:45:43.280 it's like you can find like, how can you expect 0:45:43.280 --> 0:45:45.879 anyone to love you at your best when they can't 0:45:45.880 --> 0:45:48.279 even love you at your worst kind of thing? But um, yeah, 0:45:48.280 --> 0:45:50.480 I don't know, I fully understan where you're coming from, 0:45:50.600 --> 0:45:54.440 but yeah, it's you've seen people at such highs and lows, 0:45:54.560 --> 0:45:57.800 so it's almost like yeah, Like I mean, Ashley is 0:45:57.840 --> 0:46:00.719 like the best to me, and that like she was 0:46:00.760 --> 0:46:03.640 always so raw and so herself because to me, the 0:46:03.719 --> 0:46:06.520 scariest thing is someone's not being authentic with you, and 0:46:06.560 --> 0:46:09.879 like you knew you'd never you'd never have to worry 0:46:09.920 --> 0:46:13.719 about that with her. Ashley is the definition of what 0:46:13.800 --> 0:46:18.240 you see is what you get. It is insane because people, 0:46:18.360 --> 0:46:20.200 you know, ask me all the time what's actually really 0:46:20.200 --> 0:46:22.960 like It's like you know if you've seen the show 0:46:23.120 --> 0:46:27.160 or follow her on Instagram, you know exactly what she's like. 0:46:27.680 --> 0:46:30.239 And it's funny. As someone who, like I'm not known 0:46:30.280 --> 0:46:33.120 to cry a lot. I actually try not to cry. 0:46:33.800 --> 0:46:35.600 I did Reality t V and I'm actually a highly 0:46:35.640 --> 0:46:40.440 sensitive person. If you're not crying during Reality TV, you're crazy. 0:46:40.840 --> 0:46:43.920 You're a psycho. Like she was just being fully human 0:46:44.040 --> 0:46:46.600 and stuff. So anyway, shout out to I guess I 0:46:46.640 --> 0:46:49.640 agree with that. I I cried. Yeah, you've cried on TV. 0:46:50.040 --> 0:46:53.560 You cried on TV. I don't want to talk about 0:46:53.560 --> 0:46:56.799 me crying. I gotta ask. Okay, So, Hannah, you said 0:46:56.840 --> 0:46:59.040 that you guys when you and does on your first 0:46:59.120 --> 0:47:02.480 date right like your you love to emphasize the dark humor. 0:47:02.640 --> 0:47:05.000 Has ever been a point where you guys have like 0:47:05.080 --> 0:47:08.280 drawn a line or is everything fair game for you guys? 0:47:09.120 --> 0:47:11.760 Very valid question. I feel like some of our fights 0:47:11.760 --> 0:47:14.960 in the beginning was because he would like poke at 0:47:15.040 --> 0:47:17.880 something as a joke but like kind of being serious, 0:47:17.920 --> 0:47:19.920 and I'd be like, you know that, here's my feelings 0:47:19.960 --> 0:47:22.759 and He'll be like, I'm joking. It's comedy and I'd 0:47:22.800 --> 0:47:24.839 be like, yeah, I know what comedy is. So we'd 0:47:24.840 --> 0:47:26.600 like have that back and forth and then I'd say 0:47:26.640 --> 0:47:28.920 something like that I know pushes buttons, but I'm like, 0:47:28.960 --> 0:47:32.560 I'm joking, So that's annoying. We do that to each other. 0:47:33.000 --> 0:47:37.520 So so let's wait, let's expand upon that, because exactly 0:47:37.520 --> 0:47:40.680 what you just said is exactly how Kylin and I 0:47:40.719 --> 0:47:42.120 treat each other all the time as well. So have 0:47:42.200 --> 0:47:44.799 you have you worked past it? Is there a workaround? 0:47:44.960 --> 0:47:47.680 Is there a solution? Like, what's your solution all this? Well? 0:47:47.880 --> 0:47:50.440 I love being with somebody who bust my balls, Like 0:47:50.640 --> 0:47:52.960 I love to poke fun and if you can't like 0:47:53.760 --> 0:47:56.560 poke fun back, I get bored. But it's like I 0:47:56.680 --> 0:48:00.800 finally met my match where he like, well make me upset. 0:48:00.840 --> 0:48:06.200 Sometimes I think it's like like being corny for a 0:48:06.200 --> 0:48:09.319 second and being like like he'll he'll joke about like 0:48:09.320 --> 0:48:11.000 my last season em real I TV and be like 0:48:11.200 --> 0:48:13.200 maybe if you didn't do this, and I'm like, I 0:48:13.239 --> 0:48:16.800 haven't it's recovered from that yet, Like I'm still working 0:48:16.800 --> 0:48:22.120 on that. You have to. I think you just overcommunicate 0:48:22.239 --> 0:48:25.719 and you're not like being lame by being like that's 0:48:25.719 --> 0:48:27.600 not funny, but you also have to fight about it, 0:48:27.640 --> 0:48:30.080 Like he'll joke because I always joke about like my 0:48:30.160 --> 0:48:32.359 tennis career, and he'll make a joke about my test 0:48:32.400 --> 0:48:34.080 career and I'll be like, I could joke about it, 0:48:34.440 --> 0:48:39.680 you can't not that hurt um. So I think a 0:48:39.760 --> 0:48:42.799 lot of relationships. I've been reading a lot about the 0:48:42.840 --> 0:48:45.360 stages of relationships where like at first it's the honeymoon 0:48:45.800 --> 0:48:47.520 that sor everyone knows about, but no one talks about 0:48:47.520 --> 0:48:51.239 like the boundary seeking moments. So like Dean, it's like 0:48:51.239 --> 0:48:53.799 a lot of boundary pushing where you guys are just 0:48:53.840 --> 0:48:56.760 kind of pushing boundaries to find like where you exist. 0:48:57.200 --> 0:48:59.160 And I think just being vulnerable every now and then 0:48:59.160 --> 0:49:02.000 and being like like you know that they weren't trying 0:49:02.040 --> 0:49:04.480 to hurt you. You know, they just went a little 0:49:04.520 --> 0:49:07.439 too far. So just being like I've been finding these 0:49:07.440 --> 0:49:10.279 boundaries out. I remember Ashley, it's just earlier this year, 0:49:11.200 --> 0:49:15.399 before she was pregnant, and it was like, I'm self 0:49:15.400 --> 0:49:18.759 conscious about getting pale during the winter because I know 0:49:18.840 --> 0:49:21.480 it sounds so stupid, but it's just an insecurity mind 0:49:21.520 --> 0:49:23.480 because I feel like I look like a different human 0:49:23.480 --> 0:49:25.600 being when I'm pale, and I feel I feel much 0:49:25.640 --> 0:49:28.240 more confident when I have color, So Anyway, I walked 0:49:28.239 --> 0:49:31.240 into the living room one day and Ashley was like, wow, 0:49:31.320 --> 0:49:34.759 you look really pale today. And I was like, yeah, well, 0:49:34.800 --> 0:49:39.319 you look really pimp ley today. And she started crying 0:49:39.560 --> 0:49:41.960 and I was like, my god. I was like, She's like, 0:49:42.000 --> 0:49:44.680 you know, it's a insecurity of mine. I know I 0:49:44.760 --> 0:49:46.800 have that skin. I was like, I'm sorry. I was 0:49:46.920 --> 0:49:49.560 just you know, I'm secure about being pale. I don't 0:49:49.600 --> 0:49:52.719 not like her pimples. But in the moment, oh, it 0:49:52.840 --> 0:49:56.239 was like, oh my god, Jared. She started it so like, 0:49:56.239 --> 0:49:58.440 good on you man, that was my point exactly. But 0:49:58.560 --> 0:50:00.800 she said it was more hurtful. And then she called 0:50:00.800 --> 0:50:03.240 her mom and asked her mom what was more hurtful? 0:50:03.239 --> 0:50:06.360 And I'm like, Jesus, Ashley, please, for the love of God, 0:50:06.800 --> 0:50:10.200 put the phone down, keep this between us. Oh my god. 0:50:10.760 --> 0:50:13.759 I love that after a fight or whatever, calling the 0:50:13.800 --> 0:50:15.880 mom and being like, who is actually in the wrong. Oh, 0:50:16.200 --> 0:50:18.360 we don't have a fight just between her and I. 0:50:18.440 --> 0:50:20.680 It like involves the entire family. She's got to call 0:50:20.719 --> 0:50:23.400 her sister, she calls her mom, she's and then like 0:50:23.560 --> 0:50:26.799 she'll start saying it on the phone and like I'm 0:50:26.840 --> 0:50:29.480 giving her a look as if like Hey, this is 0:50:29.560 --> 0:50:32.719 our stuff. Don't And she's just like what they don't care? 0:50:32.840 --> 0:50:35.200 And I'm like, I care, I care, Okay, I can't. 0:50:35.200 --> 0:50:37.600 They don't know, like the depth of what actually happens 0:50:37.640 --> 0:50:41.200 behind close nobody knows context. Yeah, And I don't want 0:50:41.200 --> 0:50:43.160 to throw you guys into the fire again, but I 0:50:43.200 --> 0:50:46.200 would love to watch, like after the Bachelor show of 0:50:46.320 --> 0:50:49.480 like Dean and Kaylin running around the mountains and then 0:50:49.520 --> 0:50:52.799 like you guys like fighting while she's like eating ice 0:50:52.840 --> 0:50:56.080 cream pregnant. Like that's what I want to watch, Dared. 0:50:56.120 --> 0:50:58.400 You guys should make a show like that. We should 0:50:58.440 --> 0:51:05.000 call it what now? Uh? An inside joke, Jared did 0:51:05.040 --> 0:51:07.120 actually make a show about that. It was years ago. 0:51:07.120 --> 0:51:10.560 It was a digital show. But we're still waiting for 0:51:10.600 --> 0:51:14.640 the second season to be green Land. Well, there there 0:51:14.640 --> 0:51:16.600 were some issues with it, which I don't think legally 0:51:16.640 --> 0:51:19.400 we can talk about, but I digress. Can I can? 0:51:19.480 --> 0:51:21.279 I ask you guys a question too that I feel 0:51:21.320 --> 0:51:25.400 like only you'd understand. Vast Nation is very like there's 0:51:25.520 --> 0:51:28.640 couples of the moment. Is it weird to like be 0:51:28.760 --> 0:51:31.400 in a couple and be like hot and everyone's talking 0:51:31.400 --> 0:51:35.359 about it and then like you're not as relevant and 0:51:35.400 --> 0:51:37.600 then like something happens again in your hot again, Like 0:51:37.680 --> 0:51:41.319 isn't that weird as a couple to deal with the 0:51:41.480 --> 0:51:44.920 like ups and downs of you being an item for 0:51:46.320 --> 0:51:50.120 people to like get excited or not excited about all 0:51:50.400 --> 0:51:52.120 this one first. So I remember when I was going 0:51:52.160 --> 0:51:55.200 to therapy, my therapist specifically said that I have a 0:51:55.480 --> 0:51:59.120 I have an issue with being comfortable, and I anytime 0:51:59.160 --> 0:52:03.279 anything like become you know, like expected or like plateaued, 0:52:03.600 --> 0:52:06.120 I find a way to like pull myself down, like 0:52:06.160 --> 0:52:08.239 find a way to like die bomb everything just so 0:52:08.280 --> 0:52:11.719 I can regain back to just where I was initially. 0:52:11.760 --> 0:52:13.719 So I feel like that's kind of how I'm I 0:52:13.719 --> 0:52:16.239 am in relationships to where like everything's going great and 0:52:16.280 --> 0:52:18.520 I'm like, man, this is just boring. Let's go ahead 0:52:18.560 --> 0:52:20.799 and this up really bad and see if we can 0:52:20.800 --> 0:52:22.319 just dig ourselves out of the hole and see what 0:52:22.320 --> 0:52:25.239 I'm comfortable with. Chaos. Uh what, it's not so much 0:52:25.280 --> 0:52:27.960 the chaos, I think, what what it is? And my 0:52:27.960 --> 0:52:30.400 my therapist put this pretty well, and she said it 0:52:30.440 --> 0:52:31.880 was a huge issue and I'm still working through it. 0:52:31.880 --> 0:52:34.280 Don't get me wrong, I'm not proud of this. Um. 0:52:34.360 --> 0:52:36.799 She said that I've got a real I've got like 0:52:36.800 --> 0:52:41.040 an addiction to proving to myself that I can do 0:52:41.080 --> 0:52:43.440 certain things. You know. So it's like I used to 0:52:43.440 --> 0:52:45.360 like make myself go broke all the time just to 0:52:45.400 --> 0:52:47.319 like put pull myself out of that financial hole like 0:52:47.360 --> 0:52:49.520 that kind of stuff. I mean, that's one way to 0:52:49.560 --> 0:52:53.520 go through life. It's still it's it's frustrating because it's 0:52:53.560 --> 0:52:56.279 like so just ingrained in me. Um, I will say 0:52:56.640 --> 0:52:59.920 the there's been like a semi cure to that, like 0:53:00.000 --> 0:53:01.960 a band aid. I guess you could say, is that 0:53:02.040 --> 0:53:05.399 band aid called Kalin know this band that bands called 0:53:05.360 --> 0:53:07.800 to help I suck at dating? Because every week Jared 0:53:07.840 --> 0:53:11.279 asks me questions that I give answers to that are 0:53:11.520 --> 0:53:15.200 very dumb, and they take a very small bit of 0:53:15.239 --> 0:53:17.319 context and they put a headline up and then it's 0:53:17.360 --> 0:53:19.880 all of a sudden become you know, us weekly. Not 0:53:19.920 --> 0:53:22.440 that those are big headlines or anything like that, but hey, 0:53:22.520 --> 0:53:26.000 gets us more listeners. You're right exactly. So to to 0:53:26.160 --> 0:53:29.879 your question, Um, having a podcast about dating while you're 0:53:29.920 --> 0:53:33.319 dating someone kind of helps keep that I don't want 0:53:33.320 --> 0:53:35.680 to see interest out there, but it allows me to 0:53:35.719 --> 0:53:38.800 put my foot in my mouth enough times to where, Uh, 0:53:39.040 --> 0:53:41.200 it doesn't happen quite as frequently, I guess if you will. 0:53:41.239 --> 0:53:43.400 But it's funny because sometimes when you're doing your best 0:53:43.560 --> 0:53:48.200 is when you're the most boring to the public. A thousand. 0:53:49.520 --> 0:53:51.959 It's just so weird because it's like, only you guys 0:53:52.000 --> 0:53:54.319 will understand this. Oh, do you know to many conversations 0:53:54.360 --> 0:53:56.640 Ashley and I have had where it's like we have 0:53:56.880 --> 0:54:01.200 nothing to post. This is we've got nothing. We are 0:54:01.280 --> 0:54:04.640 so boring, dude, I so okay. So reverse like ten 0:54:04.800 --> 0:54:06.920 maybe like twelve years I was in college and I 0:54:06.960 --> 0:54:10.360 was dating this girl and I like, I can't remember 0:54:10.360 --> 0:54:12.400 what it was. I think I called her boring or something, 0:54:12.840 --> 0:54:15.800 and she was, she said in response, she goes, Literally, 0:54:15.800 --> 0:54:18.680 the worst insult you could ever tell me is that 0:54:18.719 --> 0:54:21.640 I'm boring. And I've that's stuck with me so much. 0:54:21.680 --> 0:54:23.640 I would weigh rather I would be anything else in 0:54:23.640 --> 0:54:26.239 the entire world. I don't want to be boring, So like, 0:54:26.560 --> 0:54:28.880 as long as I can avoid being boring, I'm totally 0:54:28.880 --> 0:54:30.839 okay with it. But I also think people don't talk 0:54:30.960 --> 0:54:35.319 enough about how like the dopamine does change like it 0:54:35.480 --> 0:54:39.359 always does, and I'm a big romantic and like I love, 0:54:39.360 --> 0:54:41.760 having butterflies and stuff, but like you have to accept 0:54:41.800 --> 0:54:45.759 at some point that like long term relationships when you're 0:54:45.760 --> 0:54:48.799 married are not full of those highs and they're full 0:54:48.840 --> 0:54:53.279 of like more like the calmness. And I recently watched 0:54:53.320 --> 0:54:58.719 the TikTok about this, um so it's legit research on 0:54:58.760 --> 0:55:01.600 this topic. Yeah, getting the A D H D TikTok's. 0:55:01.640 --> 0:55:05.400 But someone was basically like, your brain gets more stimulated 0:55:05.440 --> 0:55:10.359 with negativity rather than positivity, which was like fascinated to me. 0:55:10.440 --> 0:55:12.719 So you're just like you when things are too calm 0:55:12.760 --> 0:55:16.560 and positive, you like, we'll make up to be more stimulated, 0:55:16.600 --> 0:55:18.560 which is dean kind of what you're saying. I think 0:55:18.560 --> 0:55:20.960 we see that in society now. It's just not like 0:55:21.000 --> 0:55:23.960 a human thing. I think we're always comming something. The 0:55:24.000 --> 0:55:27.359 news is like, yeah, King got saved, but look at 0:55:27.400 --> 0:55:31.759 all these burning bushes. Uh. And you know, the best 0:55:31.800 --> 0:55:33.960 piece of advice I ever got with dealing with love, 0:55:34.040 --> 0:55:37.279 or one of the best piece of advice was somebody said, 0:55:37.320 --> 0:55:39.560 don't forget the person that you marry is going to 0:55:39.600 --> 0:55:42.760 be the person that you have a conversation with every 0:55:42.920 --> 0:55:46.280 day for the rest of your life. And don't forget 0:55:46.320 --> 0:55:48.360 about that. So that was always that always stuck with 0:55:48.640 --> 0:55:51.000 back in my mind. But Hannah, thank you so much 0:55:51.000 --> 0:55:52.799 for joining us. I gotta I just gotta say one 0:55:52.800 --> 0:55:54.600 more thing. I gotta I gotta commend Hannah real quick 0:55:54.640 --> 0:55:57.839 because and then and then I'll take us to the break. 0:55:57.840 --> 0:56:00.200 Don't you wearry chaired? I just gotta say us to 0:56:00.280 --> 0:56:05.440 Hannah for watching a TikTok learning something and saying you 0:56:05.520 --> 0:56:07.480 learned it from a TikTok, Because if it was me, 0:56:07.920 --> 0:56:10.200 I would have a thousand percent said I read a 0:56:10.400 --> 0:56:12.960 journal on Wall Street or an article on Walltter journal 0:56:13.239 --> 0:56:16.839 about this. I read an article in Science today. You 0:56:16.880 --> 0:56:19.800 said exactly what it is. I never would have said TikTok. 0:56:19.800 --> 0:56:20.759 I would have been like, I read this in the 0:56:20.760 --> 0:56:22.560 New York Times or something. It's because it's wrong. I 0:56:22.560 --> 0:56:25.239 could just blame TikTok. But can I ask you one 0:56:25.239 --> 0:56:29.080 more question? Yeah, So I met this guy I filmed 0:56:29.080 --> 0:56:31.840 a reality TV show, and he knows me four or 0:56:31.880 --> 0:56:33.960 five months for who I am. And then the reality 0:56:34.000 --> 0:56:36.759 TV show airs, and it's like showing sides of me 0:56:36.880 --> 0:56:40.600 that are like very cut up and weird and trying 0:56:40.600 --> 0:56:43.000 to portray a stir narrative. How did you deal with 0:56:43.040 --> 0:56:45.080 your relationships when you have a rough season or like 0:56:45.080 --> 0:56:50.480 a rough um portrayal on tv M. What do you think? 0:56:51.280 --> 0:56:53.920 Just constant communication even when Ashley and I weren't together 0:56:53.960 --> 0:56:55.880 and we're going through the situation we went through on 0:56:55.880 --> 0:57:00.560 our second season of Paradise together. Uh, you know, I 0:57:00.560 --> 0:57:03.200 remember just a lot of times talking things out and 0:57:03.280 --> 0:57:05.880 just being on the phone, and you know, there's a 0:57:05.880 --> 0:57:09.399 lot of emotions and crying and why you know, what's 0:57:09.400 --> 0:57:11.600 this or what's that? But I mean, at the end 0:57:11.600 --> 0:57:13.200 of the day, I think as long as you're level 0:57:13.239 --> 0:57:15.520 headed and realized that it is a reality TV show 0:57:15.560 --> 0:57:17.720 and like things will be taking out of context, and 0:57:18.160 --> 0:57:20.960 you know, not everything is as it seems. I mean, 0:57:21.000 --> 0:57:24.360 it's very real and raw, but of course, like there 0:57:24.400 --> 0:57:27.120 are moments or elements that are of course taken out 0:57:27.120 --> 0:57:29.880 of context. I mean that's the show. The things film 0:57:30.640 --> 0:57:33.560 three days and narrowed down to an hour and twenty minutes, 0:57:33.640 --> 0:57:37.479 So I think having that understanding really helped as well. Yeah, yeah, 0:57:37.520 --> 0:57:42.520 I think similar boat. I remember when Bachelor's seasons Paradise 0:57:42.520 --> 0:57:46.080 with season six was airing, and there was not like inconsistencies, 0:57:46.080 --> 0:57:48.680 but like unanswered questions and to Jared's point, all of 0:57:48.680 --> 0:57:51.640 it is just like having the gusto to go up 0:57:51.680 --> 0:57:54.160 to your partner and be like, why is this the 0:57:54.200 --> 0:57:57.000 way that it appears? And then I can explain themselves like, Okay, cool, 0:57:57.000 --> 0:57:59.840 I I accept that why is this happening now? And 0:58:00.000 --> 0:58:02.040 as long as like everything kind of aligns in your eyes. 0:58:02.080 --> 0:58:04.840 And there were moments too, especially like at the beginning 0:58:04.840 --> 0:58:07.920 of mine and Kent's relationship, where we were rocky to 0:58:08.000 --> 0:58:09.960 an extent um. But at the end of the day, 0:58:09.960 --> 0:58:12.800 it's like we were always honest with each other. I think, yeah, 0:58:12.880 --> 0:58:15.880 I don't here so I can say it went one up. 0:58:15.960 --> 0:58:18.520 How did you deal with it? I mean I just 0:58:18.600 --> 0:58:20.920 had He was more just helping me with the comments 0:58:20.960 --> 0:58:22.560 and stuff, and he'd just be like, don't listen to 0:58:22.640 --> 0:58:25.200 the comments because like he knew what happened every day 0:58:25.240 --> 0:58:27.960 I told him in real time. Then why did he 0:58:28.080 --> 0:58:31.040 cut the video that way? What do you mean, Well, 0:58:31.080 --> 0:58:33.840 you're saying, oh you're oh, you're saying is I thought 0:58:33.840 --> 0:58:35.360 you're talking about the guy that you made the video with. 0:58:35.720 --> 0:58:38.920 Oh no, no. Dez was basically like, I just don't 0:58:38.960 --> 0:58:40.959 listen to the comments when the show was coming out, 0:58:41.280 --> 0:58:43.880 But like I was losing some self esteem when things 0:58:43.880 --> 0:58:46.600 were like going bad, and I had to be like, no, 0:58:46.720 --> 0:58:49.720 that's like Hana on TV versus like the hand of here. 0:58:49.800 --> 0:58:51.840 I have to believe in myself and believe I'm like 0:58:51.880 --> 0:58:54.360 worthy of love, even if a TV show is like 0:58:54.880 --> 0:58:58.600 going against that. Right now, there's definitely there's definitely two 0:58:58.600 --> 0:59:00.520 different people. It's the person on TV in the person 0:59:00.520 --> 0:59:03.920 in reality. Uh, And it's hard to kind of the beauty, 0:59:04.000 --> 0:59:07.160 at least for Jared and I is that our partners 0:59:07.200 --> 0:59:10.080 were also from the same arena more or less as 0:59:10.120 --> 0:59:11.680 I know, at least was on TV for a little bit, 0:59:11.720 --> 0:59:13.880 but uh, not to the same extent that you were. 0:59:13.960 --> 0:59:15.640 So I think it's a there's at least a little 0:59:15.640 --> 0:59:17.040 bit of a mismatch. But yet I think it just 0:59:17.080 --> 0:59:19.360 comes down to communication. But I will say, we've gone 0:59:19.400 --> 0:59:21.720 a way over a time. Hannah, you're not coming back 0:59:21.800 --> 0:59:26.959 for Summer House season? Is it Winter House? Now? Who cares? 0:59:27.000 --> 0:59:29.440 You're not on It doesn't matter? Tell us, tell us 0:59:29.440 --> 0:59:31.520 what you got going on next? Um, yes, see me, 0:59:31.680 --> 0:59:34.520 do stand up. I'm all over the place at hannahburn 0:59:34.560 --> 0:59:36.800 dot com. I'm going to be in l A soon. 0:59:37.200 --> 0:59:39.040 I'll hurt you guys up, if you're around, I'm going 0:59:39.120 --> 0:59:42.640 to be in Buffalo, New Jersey, Florida. Who knows so 0:59:42.720 --> 0:59:45.680 Handaburn dot com and listen to my podcast Burning in 0:59:45.720 --> 0:59:50.640 Hell and Giggly Squad and follow me at Being Burns Nice. 0:59:50.760 --> 0:59:52.440 Love it. Well, thank you so much for joining us. 0:59:52.840 --> 0:59:54.920 Don't watch Summer House, but do all those things that 0:59:54.920 --> 0:59:57.480 an I just said to do. I know I'm going 0:59:57.520 --> 1:00:00.840 to be doing that. Support reality TV. That's right, and 1:00:00.880 --> 1:00:03.040 thank you so much for joining us. We appreciate it. Uh. 1:00:03.400 --> 1:00:06.040 We can't wait to see more from you. Thank you 1:00:06.080 --> 1:00:18.880 so much, guys. Sorry for going over time, little chatterboxes. Yeah, okay, 1:00:18.920 --> 1:00:22.680 hey everybody. Scott Patterson, we are going to have Milo 1:00:22.840 --> 1:00:25.920 vent Amelia on the podcast today and we are dropping 1:00:25.960 --> 1:00:30.120 the episode immediately. We are very excited to have him. 1:00:30.200 --> 1:00:33.800 He's a he's an old, dear friend, and he gave us. 1:00:34.160 --> 1:00:36.160 He gave us some time, which is he doesn't have 1:00:36.200 --> 1:00:39.080 any time, but he gave us some time, and we really, 1:00:39.320 --> 1:00:41.680 really really appreciate it. So we're gonna do this interview 1:00:41.680 --> 1:00:45.200 with Milo, uh and we're gonna drop it immediately as 1:00:45.200 --> 1:00:46.800 soon as we can get it all cobbled together. This 1:00:46.960 --> 1:00:50.040 crack team I have and we're just very, very excited 1:00:50.080 --> 1:00:52.520 about it. So anyway, listen to my podcast I Am 1:00:52.560 --> 1:00:55.000 all in right now on I Heart Radio, app, Apple 1:00:55.040 --> 1:01:01.840 Podcast and everywhere you listen to podcasts. Welcome back everyone 1:01:02.120 --> 1:01:05.080 to help I suck at dating and Jared Man What 1:01:05.200 --> 1:01:09.520 an interview with Hannah Burner. She is something else's very funny. 1:01:09.760 --> 1:01:12.919 She's a character. She is a character, but beyond that, 1:01:12.960 --> 1:01:15.640 she's a human being that she is just like you 1:01:15.680 --> 1:01:20.919 and I can get it. We're gonna get into some 1:01:21.400 --> 1:01:24.360 listener emails. I kind of wish Hannah was here to 1:01:24.440 --> 1:01:26.200 answer these emails with that. Do you mind if I 1:01:26.240 --> 1:01:28.720 read it? I'm I'm in the mood. I feel like 1:01:28.720 --> 1:01:31.400 I have my reading voice on. Can we call Hannah 1:01:31.440 --> 1:01:33.040 back and get here to help us answer some of 1:01:33.080 --> 1:01:37.040 these emails? Well answer, yeah, totally. I mean she's nowhere 1:01:37.080 --> 1:01:39.120 to be fine. We have Riley. If Riley wants to, 1:01:39.200 --> 1:01:41.360 you know, chime in and help us answer these emails 1:01:41.360 --> 1:01:45.360 because we always need a female perspective. She is Riley 1:01:45.400 --> 1:01:46.880 is going to help us out with these emails. I've 1:01:46.920 --> 1:01:51.120 got one request. What We've got two emails. Let's take 1:01:51.160 --> 1:01:56.680 the time to answer one and then let's call Hannah 1:01:56.800 --> 1:02:02.240 back and hey, pipe dream what are we thought our 1:02:02.240 --> 1:02:04.520 pipe dreams? Let's call her and then have her help 1:02:04.600 --> 1:02:06.600 us answer the second one. What do you say? Is 1:02:06.600 --> 1:02:08.960 that crazy? Am I crazy? I think you're crazy? Yeah, 1:02:09.000 --> 1:02:10.600 somebody get hand on the line. See if we can 1:02:10.640 --> 1:02:12.240 get her a call in no, no, no, no no will 1:02:12.280 --> 1:02:15.280 answer williamswer me and you and Riley will capably handle 1:02:15.320 --> 1:02:16.800 this first one. Yeah, that's what I mean. And then 1:02:16.880 --> 1:02:18.640 get her on the line for the second one, and 1:02:18.640 --> 1:02:22.200 then okay, and then again and then this, man, how 1:02:22.200 --> 1:02:24.480 can you do this? How can how can we structure this? 1:02:24.840 --> 1:02:26.560 You're right, You're right. It's probably not going to be 1:02:26.600 --> 1:02:30.240 able to happen. But it's just I read read the 1:02:30.240 --> 1:02:34.120 email reading. Here's the first email, of course, from anonymous. 1:02:34.320 --> 1:02:36.880 I have been dating my boyfriend for about a year now. 1:02:36.920 --> 1:02:39.360 When we started dating, he was really motivated to work 1:02:39.360 --> 1:02:41.959 out and was losing a lot of weight. Fast forward 1:02:42.000 --> 1:02:43.880 to now a year later, and he's putting some of 1:02:43.920 --> 1:02:46.880 the weight on, and from what I can tell, maybe 1:02:46.880 --> 1:02:50.000 from stress eating. I'm a very healthy person who has 1:02:50.080 --> 1:02:52.800 kept a good workout regiment and a good diet all 1:02:52.840 --> 1:02:55.320 my adult life and would like a partner who does 1:02:55.320 --> 1:02:57.600 the same, which it looked like he was doing when 1:02:57.600 --> 1:03:00.640 we first met. The problem is now we're year into this. 1:03:00.800 --> 1:03:03.840 I love him and this is really the only problem, 1:03:03.880 --> 1:03:06.320 but it is bothering me. I don't want it to 1:03:06.360 --> 1:03:10.920 be our whole future thoughts. What should I do? Yeah, 1:03:11.000 --> 1:03:13.200 my thought is I'm looking over to see Kalen and 1:03:13.240 --> 1:03:18.680 I'm asking why did she email our podcast anonymous? Dude, 1:03:18.680 --> 1:03:20.920 if you're out of shape, then we got bigger issues. 1:03:21.360 --> 1:03:24.560 Oh my gosh, no, I said, every single week, every 1:03:24.600 --> 1:03:26.840 chance I can get, I am getting out of shape horribly. 1:03:26.920 --> 1:03:29.840 Caitlin gets hotter by the day. I get a little fatter, 1:03:30.040 --> 1:03:33.760 a little stough. Yer. Um, I think. I think what 1:03:33.800 --> 1:03:39.000 it is is there's something about COVID and quarantine and 1:03:39.040 --> 1:03:40.840 just everything that's been happening in the world over the 1:03:40.880 --> 1:03:43.840 past year or two that's like demotivated a lot of people. 1:03:43.920 --> 1:03:45.640 And I know because I'm one of those people that's 1:03:45.680 --> 1:03:49.640 been demotivated. Like I used to work out six times 1:03:49.640 --> 1:03:52.760 a week. I used to eat super healthy. I would 1:03:52.840 --> 1:03:57.080 drink once a week, maybe twice a week. Now I haven't. 1:03:57.120 --> 1:03:59.960 I haven't touched, I haven't been to a weight room. 1:04:00.040 --> 1:04:02.200 Him a Jim, I haven't gone on a run in years, 1:04:02.760 --> 1:04:05.400 and I drink five times a week. So my i'm 1:04:05.400 --> 1:04:08.800 my diet and lifestyle is getting worse, and my workout 1:04:08.840 --> 1:04:14.320 regiment is become non existent. Um. And so I want 1:04:14.360 --> 1:04:16.280 you to give this guy the been of the fit 1:04:16.360 --> 1:04:19.080 of the doubt, because I hope Kalin is also giving 1:04:19.080 --> 1:04:21.000 me the benefit of the doubt. If you will. Yeah, 1:04:21.040 --> 1:04:24.000 But my question is, so is Calin Like what if 1:04:24.040 --> 1:04:26.240 Calin came up to you and said, hey, we should 1:04:26.320 --> 1:04:28.440 run together, we should work out together. Would you be 1:04:28.480 --> 1:04:30.600 offended by that or would you say, okay, no, I 1:04:30.640 --> 1:04:33.680 can do that. Well, I know she would never ever 1:04:33.760 --> 1:04:39.200 say that. Kalen has a has had eight pack abs 1:04:39.280 --> 1:04:41.920 and she loses ten pounds over the course of a 1:04:41.960 --> 1:04:45.919 month simply by willing it into existence, lies and age things. 1:04:45.920 --> 1:04:48.960 She's only twenty five, you have very lucky. Um, She's 1:04:49.000 --> 1:04:51.320 also has she's twenty six. She hates that I always 1:04:51.360 --> 1:04:53.760 think she's twenty five. She's gotta She's got a far 1:04:53.800 --> 1:04:56.040 better diet than I don't I do. She doesn't eat meat, 1:04:56.160 --> 1:04:58.280 she is very conscious of what she puts in her body. 1:04:58.440 --> 1:05:00.600 And also she only meets half of her meals and 1:05:00.600 --> 1:05:03.280 whenever she does that, I eat the other half. Tell 1:05:03.280 --> 1:05:05.840 her wait till she's thirty two. As Adam Sandler said, 1:05:06.000 --> 1:05:09.520 I I have jello and my ask jiggles for a week. Um. 1:05:10.320 --> 1:05:14.280 So you know, I think for this, uh, listen, you 1:05:14.280 --> 1:05:16.720 can address it by not addressing it. I think if 1:05:16.760 --> 1:05:19.320 you guys do workout plans together, if you go on 1:05:19.480 --> 1:05:23.320 runs together, you already have a very active lifestyle. Why 1:05:23.360 --> 1:05:25.680 not just invite him? Dean shaking his head, but like, 1:05:25.720 --> 1:05:27.400 what are you supposed to do? What if you know 1:05:27.600 --> 1:05:30.360 this is very important to her, She wants a partner 1:05:30.400 --> 1:05:33.360 who's very much into a healthy lifestyle like she is. 1:05:33.840 --> 1:05:36.120 Invite him to a run, Invite him to if you 1:05:36.160 --> 1:05:38.760 live in l A Laurel Canyon, you guys can hike together. 1:05:38.800 --> 1:05:40.480 It will be a grand old day. Then you can 1:05:40.560 --> 1:05:42.880 have a nice dinner in the park. Yeah. I think 1:05:42.880 --> 1:05:44.720 as long as it's not like overboard, like as long 1:05:44.720 --> 1:05:47.760 as he's not becoming like more really obese, I would say, 1:05:47.880 --> 1:05:49.960 just kind of like like you're saying, take him on 1:05:50.080 --> 1:05:53.200 hikes every once in a while. I like, sometimes I 1:05:53.280 --> 1:05:56.600 wish Kalin would more be more like, let's go climb 1:05:56.680 --> 1:05:58.360 this mountain, Let's go climb that rock. But at the 1:05:58.400 --> 1:06:00.760 end of the day, it's like, I love her for 1:06:00.840 --> 1:06:02.480 the person that she is, and so I think that 1:06:02.520 --> 1:06:04.920 maybe this anonymous person needs to be like more accepting 1:06:04.960 --> 1:06:09.000 of her boyfriend for being a little chunky. Alright, Riley, 1:06:09.040 --> 1:06:10.760 do you have any thoughts. I think she's being a 1:06:10.760 --> 1:06:13.840 little harsh. I know it's been an amount of time, 1:06:13.840 --> 1:06:15.600 but I agree. I think she should give him some 1:06:15.640 --> 1:06:19.040 slack with everything that's been going on. And I think 1:06:19.120 --> 1:06:21.120 she's like taking to extreme that she thinks this is 1:06:21.120 --> 1:06:23.640 going to be forever, Like maybe just look at it 1:06:23.640 --> 1:06:27.880 as like a season instead of his forever lifestyle. And 1:06:28.040 --> 1:06:31.040 quarantine has not helped. Dude. It's so funny too, because 1:06:31.040 --> 1:06:32.640 I'm sure we can all attest to the same thing 1:06:32.720 --> 1:06:35.480 where it's like at the beginning of quarantine February or 1:06:35.480 --> 1:06:39.320 what would be like April twenty twenty, everyone's like, Oh 1:06:39.360 --> 1:06:41.680 my gosh, I'm going to use these three months to 1:06:41.680 --> 1:06:43.120 get in the best shape of my life. I'm gonna 1:06:43.160 --> 1:06:46.240 work out every morning, I'm gonna eat healthy. All of 1:06:46.280 --> 1:06:48.200 a sudden, four months later, you're like, oh my god, 1:06:48.240 --> 1:06:50.680 I've gained twenty pounds. What am I doing? So I 1:06:51.000 --> 1:06:53.240 agree with Riley. It's a season, it's a phase. It's 1:06:53.240 --> 1:06:55.520 going to pass. If he had that mindset when you 1:06:55.520 --> 1:06:58.240 guys first met, he'll find that mindset again, hopefully if 1:06:58.280 --> 1:07:01.560 he wants to enough. I know, again personally, drawing from 1:07:01.600 --> 1:07:04.200 my own experiences, I know that I need to get 1:07:04.200 --> 1:07:06.320 back in the gym, and I am ready to get 1:07:06.320 --> 1:07:11.000 back in the gym. And it's just a matter of time, right, 1:07:11.040 --> 1:07:12.880 So it's like, hopefully in this case, this guy is 1:07:12.920 --> 1:07:14.080 just a matter of time to get back in the 1:07:14.160 --> 1:07:16.960 gym and getting restoring his body back to how it 1:07:17.040 --> 1:07:20.240 used to be. All right. Our second email, of course, 1:07:20.280 --> 1:07:27.800 comes from you guessed it Anonymous? Yes, good job. Before 1:07:27.840 --> 1:07:30.439 we answer this email, I want to call Hannah back. 1:07:30.520 --> 1:07:35.320 And we're gonna answer this email with Hannah. Okay, I mean, 1:07:35.400 --> 1:07:37.240 are you gonna call her? I'm gonna call her right now? 1:07:37.720 --> 1:07:39.360 Do you even have service? Where the hell are you? 1:07:40.040 --> 1:07:44.200 I am going to call her? Everyone stand by, we're standing. 1:07:44.880 --> 1:07:48.240 Can you gotta put on speaker and put it right 1:07:48.280 --> 1:07:49.520 next to the mic. We want to be able to 1:07:49.560 --> 1:07:52.720 hear this conversation. There. It is, there, it is. I 1:07:52.720 --> 1:07:58.880 can hear it ring. And now hello, hey Hannah, Sorry, Um, 1:07:59.040 --> 1:08:00.680 we know you let you go. We gotta bring you 1:08:00.720 --> 1:08:03.040 back for this last email. It's got your name written 1:08:03.040 --> 1:08:04.360 all over it and we couldn't answer it with act. 1:08:04.360 --> 1:08:06.120 You said, do you mind? Oh, hell yeah, let's do it. 1:08:06.440 --> 1:08:10.440 Dean's had seventy two glasses of wine and he refused 1:08:10.560 --> 1:08:12.640 to do another email without you. So I'm so glad 1:08:12.680 --> 1:08:15.160 you're back. It's anything better to do today? This do 1:08:15.240 --> 1:08:18.280 it perfectly well. This one is from Anonymous. So we 1:08:18.320 --> 1:08:21.120 have this joke going on Hannah that Anonymous is actually 1:08:21.200 --> 1:08:23.960 Nick Vial and then he just he just emails us 1:08:24.080 --> 1:08:29.080 constantly all the time. I saw Nick on TikTok recently, 1:08:29.760 --> 1:08:32.000 he's all over TikTok. He does a great job. Yeah, 1:08:32.280 --> 1:08:34.559 what do we think it is TikTok's? Can we before 1:08:34.560 --> 1:08:36.640 we get into Anonymous, is TikTok? What do we thinking that? 1:08:37.040 --> 1:08:40.000 I'm really happy that Nick found someone because he was 1:08:40.439 --> 1:08:43.000 confusing my ask when he was like basically explaining love 1:08:43.040 --> 1:08:45.800 to everyone, and I'm like, but Nick, you haven't found it, 1:08:46.000 --> 1:08:47.560 so what's going on? But then he found it? So 1:08:47.600 --> 1:08:50.200 now I'm like, he's the love girl and she's awesome, 1:08:50.400 --> 1:08:55.000 and seeing I like seeing the way he is now 1:08:55.439 --> 1:08:57.519 so with Nick, and Dean can attest this. There are 1:08:57.560 --> 1:09:01.360 times where Nick is like peak Nick, and so he's 1:09:01.439 --> 1:09:05.400 great to be around, you know, because like Nick sometimes 1:09:05.680 --> 1:09:07.720 isn't the best to be around, because like he knows it. 1:09:07.840 --> 1:09:10.679 He can be like detached and like not self aware 1:09:10.720 --> 1:09:14.360 and be on his phone constantly, and and but there 1:09:14.360 --> 1:09:17.320 are moments where Nick is just amazing and you're like, 1:09:17.360 --> 1:09:19.320 that's the guy. That's the guy I love, and that's 1:09:19.320 --> 1:09:21.280 the guy I'm friends with. He is that guy all 1:09:21.280 --> 1:09:25.160 the time now, because well I actually I've met Nick 1:09:25.240 --> 1:09:27.000 a couple of times, and one thing I really love 1:09:27.040 --> 1:09:29.439 about him is he tells it like it is, and 1:09:30.520 --> 1:09:33.840 I respect that a lot in a person. He tells 1:09:33.840 --> 1:09:35.960 it how it is, and he always has his shirt 1:09:36.000 --> 1:09:44.760 off about it. He's self aware. And the beard is 1:09:45.080 --> 1:09:47.559 the beard was such a game changer for that guy. Man, 1:09:47.640 --> 1:09:49.240 I wish I could grow a beard like him, said, 1:09:49.280 --> 1:09:51.439 I got do you want Do you want to read 1:09:51.439 --> 1:09:52.479 this email? Do you want me to read it? How 1:09:52.520 --> 1:09:53.800 do you want to do that? I got it ready? 1:09:54.120 --> 1:09:56.559 All right? So this is from anonymous. Hi, I'm in 1:09:56.560 --> 1:09:59.120 a tricky situation. I've been single for most of my 1:09:59.160 --> 1:10:02.080 life then started dating more when I was twenty nine, 1:10:02.479 --> 1:10:05.680 then met my current boyfriend that year. We met on 1:10:05.920 --> 1:10:08.719 Hinge and have been together for a year this month. 1:10:08.960 --> 1:10:11.120 I'll be honest, I didn't expect it to last more 1:10:11.160 --> 1:10:13.639 than just a few months. He was super keen after 1:10:13.680 --> 1:10:15.960 the second date, but he's so different from who I 1:10:15.960 --> 1:10:18.360 would normally be interested in, so it took me a 1:10:18.400 --> 1:10:22.679 little bit longer to get there. We've been talking about marriage. Uh, 1:10:22.760 --> 1:10:25.600 We've been talking about marriage since fairly early on in 1:10:25.640 --> 1:10:27.880 our relationship, and he pretty much said he's ready to 1:10:27.920 --> 1:10:30.439 propose when I say I'm ready. He's thirty three and 1:10:30.479 --> 1:10:33.720 I'm thirty. Now. I'm just not sure if this is it. 1:10:33.720 --> 1:10:36.080 It doesn't feel how I thought it would, and I'm 1:10:36.080 --> 1:10:40.160 not sure if that's just because society chick flips chick 1:10:40.200 --> 1:10:43.880 flicks set you up with unrealistic expectations, or because I'm 1:10:43.960 --> 1:10:46.000 very careful with big decisions. I'm not sure if I 1:10:46.000 --> 1:10:49.599 should be waiting until I feel quote in love or 1:10:49.800 --> 1:10:53.280 how to know if it's right. Yeah, So I'm just 1:10:53.280 --> 1:10:54.960 gonna go I'm gonna go ahead. I'm gonna see this 1:10:55.000 --> 1:10:57.839 off real quick. I know it's a little different because Hannah, 1:10:57.880 --> 1:10:59.960 you were head over heels with Daz right away from eating. 1:11:00.080 --> 1:11:01.759 But a lot of the other things line up pretty 1:11:01.800 --> 1:11:04.240 well with your situation. So I just want to see 1:11:04.240 --> 1:11:05.599 that up for you, and I would love for you 1:11:05.640 --> 1:11:07.519 to just kind of no. I totally get it where 1:11:07.560 --> 1:11:10.519 I've dated a lot and then met someone who is serious. 1:11:11.439 --> 1:11:14.920 Getting married is a serious thing, and I think I 1:11:14.960 --> 1:11:17.519 got excited with all like the butterflies, and I was 1:11:17.720 --> 1:11:20.519 deeply in love with this guy. I think with her, 1:11:20.720 --> 1:11:26.040 fucking wait, there's no rush, and like, keep experiencing him, 1:11:26.080 --> 1:11:30.439 keep learning about him, and I say, make an educated decision, 1:11:30.760 --> 1:11:33.400 and if I just believe in your gut, And she 1:11:33.520 --> 1:11:35.280 sounds a little scared, and I don't think you should 1:11:35.320 --> 1:11:39.320 force yourself until like but also people do joke like 1:11:39.520 --> 1:11:42.519 or they say you're gonna know, you're gonna know, No 1:11:42.640 --> 1:11:48.439 one ever knows. It's always a little bit of a risk. 1:11:48.960 --> 1:11:51.519 So I think that she gives herself more time. What 1:11:51.600 --> 1:11:53.760 do you guys think, I gotta say it to. One 1:11:53.800 --> 1:11:56.519 of the biggest detriments to relationships in society in general 1:11:56.760 --> 1:11:59.200 is that mindset where it's like when you know you know, 1:11:59.520 --> 1:12:02.800 or know like this person said, anonymous said, like there's 1:12:02.800 --> 1:12:05.559 like a romance idea of how your relationship should be, 1:12:05.880 --> 1:12:08.679 and a hundred times it's not going to be that way, 1:12:08.960 --> 1:12:10.600 and people like expect it to be that way, and 1:12:10.600 --> 1:12:12.599 when it's not, they get scared run away. So it's like, 1:12:13.200 --> 1:12:16.120 it's just not. It's just not. It's not going to 1:12:16.240 --> 1:12:18.559 be that way. And at the end of the day, 1:12:18.560 --> 1:12:22.160 it's like, if you like this person enough to spend 1:12:22.200 --> 1:12:24.080 every day with them and know that you're gonna spend 1:12:24.080 --> 1:12:25.720 every day with them, like Jared said earlier, it's like 1:12:25.720 --> 1:12:27.240 you're gonna have a conversation with this person for the 1:12:27.280 --> 1:12:29.000 rest of your life. Like if you can see that happening, 1:12:29.600 --> 1:12:31.439 that should be enough more or less to at least 1:12:31.439 --> 1:12:35.160 give it a fair chance. Um, so I fully agree 1:12:35.160 --> 1:12:37.639 it take your time. Marriage is a big decision and 1:12:38.400 --> 1:12:40.880 in in you know, in an ideal world, we're all 1:12:40.920 --> 1:12:42.840 gonna get married once and that's the end of it. 1:12:43.240 --> 1:12:45.599 Uh Fortunately, unfortunately we don't live in that ideal world. 1:12:45.640 --> 1:12:48.000 But do your best to make sure that that decision 1:12:48.120 --> 1:12:50.160 is the best decision for you. And like you said, 1:12:50.160 --> 1:12:53.519 no rush, just have fun with it and understand that 1:12:53.800 --> 1:12:56.200 just because you don't have like these intense butterflies love 1:12:56.240 --> 1:12:58.200 at first sight feeling doesn't mean that this isn't your 1:12:58.240 --> 1:13:02.200 forever person. Yeah, I totally agree. I mean it's if 1:13:02.200 --> 1:13:04.519 you really want to know. I feel like you should 1:13:04.520 --> 1:13:06.320 break up with a person if you can't stop thinking 1:13:06.360 --> 1:13:08.479 about them, then you know that you don't want to 1:13:08.479 --> 1:13:11.160 go on in life without them. But that's also a 1:13:11.160 --> 1:13:13.760 big risk. Where you're saying break up, I'm not saying 1:13:13.800 --> 1:13:15.960 you should. I'm saying it's an option on the table. 1:13:16.520 --> 1:13:18.680 And see if you feel like you lost the love 1:13:18.720 --> 1:13:21.000 of your life. I mean, isn't it who whose song 1:13:21.160 --> 1:13:22.840 is that where it's like the only way to know 1:13:23.040 --> 1:13:24.960 is to let it go. I think that's like Sarah 1:13:24.960 --> 1:13:27.679 Burry ellis. So maybe you shouldn't say no. I gotta 1:13:27.720 --> 1:13:30.240 say anonymous, JAREDY, I appreciate what you're doing. You're playing 1:13:30.240 --> 1:13:33.280 Devil's advocate, but that's the dumbest advice you ever given. Man. 1:13:33.320 --> 1:13:35.160 I'm just saying, what happens if they break up and 1:13:35.160 --> 1:13:39.320 now she knows he goes murder him, murder him, see 1:13:39.320 --> 1:13:42.200 if see if you feel anything, When you feel pain, 1:13:42.280 --> 1:13:45.120 then you know you made a mistake. Jared, that is 1:13:45.200 --> 1:13:47.840 super toxic. Don't break up with a guy just to 1:13:47.880 --> 1:13:50.400 see if you're not, if you can't live like without him, 1:13:50.439 --> 1:13:54.519 that's such bad advice. He's like, lock him in the basement, 1:13:54.760 --> 1:13:58.360 don't if you feel bad, just put the TV on. 1:13:58.520 --> 1:14:01.000 He'll be fine. You give them reave meals a day, 1:14:01.080 --> 1:14:03.120 and then you waited out two weeks and then if 1:14:03.120 --> 1:14:04.800 you want to move on, you can, and if not, 1:14:04.840 --> 1:14:06.240 then you might be in jail for a little while. 1:14:06.240 --> 1:14:08.439 But it's totally worth it in the end. What do 1:14:08.520 --> 1:14:12.719 you call Jared toxic? Oh well, no, he's not toxic, 1:14:12.800 --> 1:14:17.080 but that was very toxic gave Please don't do that anyways. 1:14:17.120 --> 1:14:18.800 Definitely don't you And thank you so much for joining 1:14:18.840 --> 1:14:21.360 us for that call. I'm sorry for taking away from 1:14:21.560 --> 1:14:28.200 from your Yeah, but I appreciate that. We appreciate you again. Uh. 1:14:28.800 --> 1:14:33.120 Please go to Hannah Berner dot com to follow where 1:14:33.120 --> 1:14:36.080 she's gonna be next. That's Hannah b E R n 1:14:36.120 --> 1:14:38.400 e r dot com, or just follow on social media. 1:14:38.439 --> 1:14:40.920 That's also a good solution. Thank you to everyone else, 1:14:41.000 --> 1:14:45.120 Jared of course, Hannah, Riley Easton, Mark, everyone else at 1:14:45.120 --> 1:14:48.679 I Heeart Radio. Thank you tune in next week where 1:14:48.720 --> 1:14:51.559 maybe we suck just a little bit less. Follow hell 1:14:51.800 --> 1:14:54.799 by suck at Dating on I Heart radio or wherever 1:14:54.880 --> 1:14:55.839 you listen to podcast