Speaker 1: Last weekend, I attended the first ever Black Effect Podcast
Speaker 1: Festival in Atlanta, and y'all, it was absolutely amazing. Not
Speaker 1: only did I have the opportunity to be a part
Speaker 1: of the Women in Podcasting panel with some amazing women,
Speaker 1: but I also got a chance to meet tons of
Speaker 1: new people. Shout out to my professional homegirls for pulling up,
Speaker 1: Thank y'all for always holding me down and not up.
Speaker 1: Shout out to the cousins that was in the audience,
Speaker 1: and last but not least, shout out to my family
Speaker 1: from Black Effect Podcast Network. The festival was sold out okay,
Speaker 1: and the energy y'all was fire. Trust me when I
Speaker 1: say this, If you didn't make it to this year's festival,
Speaker 1: you do not, I repeat, you do not want to
Speaker 1: miss out on next year's event. Now let's get into
Speaker 1: this week's episode as my guest shares her experiences with
Speaker 1: sex parties. Sex parties have a history dating back to
Speaker 1: the sexual liberation movement in the nineteen seventies in nineteen eighties,
Speaker 1: during which they began to gain popularity. While these events
Speaker 1: can take on different forms, they often involve in the
Speaker 1: environment that promotes openness, exploration, and sexual expression. Our guest
Speaker 1: today will share her personal experiences and insights on attending
Speaker 1: sex parties. It is important to remember that participation in
Speaker 1: these events should always be consensual, safe, and legal. To
Speaker 1: my guests, how are you doing?
Speaker 2: I am good? How are you?
Speaker 1: I'm all as well? All is cute. I can't complain,
Speaker 1: you know, I'm really excited to have this conversation with you.
Speaker 2: I'm excited as well. I love y'all. All is cute.
Speaker 2: I'm all cute too.
Speaker 1: Okay, it's all about the cuteness. Okay, keeping it cute, y'all. Now,
Speaker 1: please describe what a sex party is and how it works.
Speaker 3: So, a sex party or a play party is basically
Speaker 3: when a lot of open minded, free you know, free
Speaker 3: thinking individuals come together.
Speaker 2: For the purposes of I want to say that it's.
Speaker 3: For the purpose of like networking and meeting other people
Speaker 3: with like similar interests.
Speaker 2: And during these.
Speaker 3: Parties, people might, you know, you might meet a new partner,
Speaker 3: you might change yourself with some partners, maybe you just
Speaker 3: watch the way that it looks. Often varies depending on
Speaker 3: who you are, but in general, I want to say
Speaker 3: it's like a networking event for people with you know,
Speaker 3: same interests.
Speaker 2: Sexual interests.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, okay, because I'm like, when you say networking,
Speaker 1: are you talking about like not business now, I mean,
Speaker 1: but that happens, but that could happen.
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, but the I guess the main purpose is
Speaker 3: sexual interest.
Speaker 1: Okay, Now do you think sex parties are still taboo?
Speaker 1: And if so, why so?
Speaker 3: I want to say fifty fifty on this because I
Speaker 3: do believe that in this eraror, people are like more
Speaker 3: open with their sexuality. I Also what I've also noticed
Speaker 3: is that people are more interested in sex parties, like
Speaker 3: they want to go.
Speaker 2: They're like, I don't know, it's I feel like it's much.
Speaker 3: Less taboo than it has been in the past, but
Speaker 3: it still is tabooed.
Speaker 1: I feel like in New York is very common.
Speaker 3: Right, And that's why I'm like, I don't know if
Speaker 3: this is just because I'm a New Yorker, so it's
Speaker 3: just like you.
Speaker 2: Know, you know, at like I don't know.
Speaker 3: I feel like I can invited to one of these
Speaker 3: things damn near every week at this.
Speaker 1: Point, right, and I feel like anything yeah, right, Like it's.
Speaker 4: Not even people that I know it, Like if you
Speaker 4: random motherfucker be like what is happening? Like do I
Speaker 4: have really, Yes, girl, I was in a whole other
Speaker 4: country and people was asking. But that's what I'm saying,
Speaker 4: Like I was in another country and people were like
Speaker 4: approaching me, asking me.
Speaker 2: So that's why I think it's less taboo.
Speaker 5: Because it's just like mm hmm, I wasn't doing anything
Speaker 5: particularly like I don't know, I wasn't doing anything at
Speaker 5: all that screen, like that screen like, oh, let me
Speaker 5: invite this person to a play.
Speaker 1: Party right now? Are there different types of sex parties?
Speaker 1: And if so, which ones do you go to?
Speaker 2: I don't. I'm actually not sure if there's different kinds.
Speaker 3: The different kinds that I know, I call them the
Speaker 3: safe ones and the unsafe ones.
Speaker 2: Okay, I prefer the safe ones.
Speaker 3: But when I say there's there's safe ones and unsafe ones,
Speaker 3: I feel like some of them they have where there's
Speaker 3: like there's less rules and my rules. I mean, like
Speaker 3: you don't have to get like check for forehand, or
Speaker 3: there's not like condments available. That's not like Russian roule, right,
Speaker 3: So like those those are called the unsafe ones, but
Speaker 3: then there are also but then there's the opposite where
Speaker 3: you know you're getting checked beforehand.
Speaker 2: I've seen ones where you have to get a background checked,
Speaker 2: like that that.
Speaker 3: One was, Yeah, that that one was like they were
Speaker 3: on it, on it. But I also it's it's much
Speaker 3: more of a pleasurable experience knowing that like all these
Speaker 3: things are available and that you know that everything everyone
Speaker 3: went to a process, and that everyone in the room,
Speaker 3: you know, is safe because not everyone has those conversations
Speaker 3: that everyone's comfortable with asking people.
Speaker 2: Of their status and things of that nature.
Speaker 3: So I don't know, to me, it's more comfortable, but
Speaker 3: I guess now that I'm talking about it and thinking
Speaker 3: about it, there's also like impromptu shit because I like
Speaker 3: to hope. I like to host events a lot, and
Speaker 3: I've noticed that some of my like regular vanilla events
Speaker 3: have turned you know, a little wild. I do so
Speaker 3: I don't host, I don't host play parties, but I
Speaker 3: do host gay nights. I used to do gay nights
Speaker 3: like throughout the city, and then some of my game
Speaker 3: nights will get a little wild at the end.
Speaker 1: Learn something new every day on the Professional Homegirl podcast
Speaker 1: something knowing this girl for how long?
Speaker 2: Wow?
Speaker 1: But go ahead, learn something new every day.
Speaker 2: I think it's just my personality.
Speaker 3: I feel like I make people feel like very comfortable,
Speaker 3: So I don't know it should just be happening.
Speaker 1: But I also feel like with the safe parties it
Speaker 1: brings out a certain crowd because I feel like when
Speaker 1: you have less restrictions and rules, it brings out a
Speaker 1: whole different type of crowd that I'm pretty sure a
Speaker 1: lot of people are kind of like, Eh.
Speaker 2: It's true.
Speaker 3: So I've noticed the ones with a lot of rules
Speaker 3: and like a lot of things that you need to
Speaker 3: do beforehand, it's often a professional crowd.
Speaker 2: Like those are the parties.
Speaker 3: Where I'm usually around doctors, lawyers, people from shreet like
Speaker 3: those part those are how those usually come out. And
Speaker 3: the ones that are kind of like not just easy breezy, right,
Speaker 3: let's see what's gonna like, what's gonna go down? Those
Speaker 3: are usually like someone.
Speaker 2: I get into, I go taking an argument or somebody
Speaker 2: happened often right right that part, but it doesn't happened often.
Speaker 3: But I will say that I've seen that more at
Speaker 3: one of those parties than when that was you know,
Speaker 3: more organized.
Speaker 2: M hmm.
Speaker 1: Now have you noticed any changes in the sex party
Speaker 1: scenes since you've been going, And if so, what are they.
Speaker 3: Not?
Speaker 2: Really?
Speaker 3: I think no, not really it's still no phones, Like
Speaker 3: I haven't been to any where phones have been allowed.
Speaker 3: It's still be respectful, it's still always asked for consent. Yeah, no,
Speaker 3: I haven't really seen a big difference. But I also
Speaker 3: haven't been doing these for a really long time. I
Speaker 3: won't want to say, maybe three four years enough time.
Speaker 2: Really, what's been the same for the four years of
Speaker 2: and involved?
Speaker 1: Now, how were you introduced to these parties?
Speaker 2: So my man, my man, my man, my man, my man.
Speaker 3: Bless that man's heart. So one day, this fine young
Speaker 3: man decides to tell me that, like.
Speaker 2: Yo, we're gonna go to a party. I'm like like right,
Speaker 2: I'm just I'm just like okay.
Speaker 3: And then the outfit he got us was like we
Speaker 3: had like this mansion outfit with the Halloween party. So
Speaker 3: we have this mansion out that mind you. I will disclaimer.
Speaker 3: I have been I have been a part of a
Speaker 3: lot of like group sex things, so like a bunch
Speaker 3: of people in the room having sex at the same time.
Speaker 2: So I've had I guess, but we didn't switch partners.
Speaker 2: Nobody was switching partners.
Speaker 3: It was just I've been in like I've been in
Speaker 3: rooms with like five couple of times set at one time.
Speaker 1: And you're having sex too.
Speaker 3: M hmm, Okay, I've had people like watching, so I
Speaker 3: just wanted to prenote that I've already had those experiences just.
Speaker 2: So people don't be like dam ye man, he set
Speaker 2: you up right, So and he was aware of this.
Speaker 3: He was aware that I've been in these type of situations.
Speaker 3: So anyway, s flashboard or whatever. So it's a Halloween party.
Speaker 3: He's like, yeah, we're going.
Speaker 2: To the party. I'll get to our little sex.
Speaker 3: And I'm just like whatever, it's Halloween, Like, I'm not
Speaker 3: thinking too much of it, right, And we.
Speaker 2: Drive hours It was probably like a two hours drive.
Speaker 1: Wow, right, like upstate man, not upstate.
Speaker 2: It was younger at the time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's by two hours.
Speaker 2: So going on quick whatever. We get to the front door.
Speaker 3: He rings the bell or whatever, and he looks at
Speaker 3: me and he says, I just met these people last week,
Speaker 3: Like I don't know, I don't know who's crooky at
Speaker 3: So I was the first like what is happening? And
Speaker 3: then before I could even say anything, the couple opens
Speaker 3: the door, right, And it was funny too, because the
Speaker 3: couple opens the door and there they have like the
Speaker 3: same outfit that we have one that was funny.
Speaker 1: Oh, it's giving swingers.
Speaker 2: So we go in.
Speaker 3: So my party, you know, I'm like, I'm from the city.
Speaker 3: Like I've been to a bunch of parties. You know, parties,
Speaker 3: there's usually a bunch of different people. Want to see singles,
Speaker 3: you're gonna see couples, You're gonna you want to see
Speaker 3: a bunch.
Speaker 1: Offer it's a party.
Speaker 2: It's a party. And this man told me that we
Speaker 2: were going to a party. I walk in. It's nothing
Speaker 2: but couples.
Speaker 1: Mm hmm.
Speaker 2: So I sit down, I look at him. I'm like,
Speaker 2: I'm whispered. I'm like, where are we And he was like,
Speaker 2: I think this might be a sweater party.
Speaker 3: Like this is like he's whispering back because like I
Speaker 3: think we're in a sweager party. I said, what's our rules?
Speaker 3: He said, what's your rules? I said no rules? And
Speaker 3: he was like, I got no rules.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, come on, let me out.
Speaker 3: And communication is important, Like if you ever go to
Speaker 3: one of these things and you go with your partner,
Speaker 3: communication is very very important.
Speaker 2: You need to figure out those rules.
Speaker 1: Which we're going to talk about later, because I feel
Speaker 1: like when you do go with your partner. It can
Speaker 1: go good, or it can go left real quick.
Speaker 3: You have a whole lot of fun, or y'all could
Speaker 3: be arguing on the way back home, right, you want
Speaker 3: to have a lot of fun. But yeah, so what
Speaker 3: so we're playing games or whatever, but it's not no
Speaker 3: freaky shit has happened, like it's real regular. Then at
Speaker 3: some point of the night, the host is like, okay,
Speaker 3: this is part two.
Speaker 2: Like I'm like part two. I'm like, what is happening?
Speaker 3: He was like, you know, the games are going to
Speaker 3: get a little more risky, like you know, if you're
Speaker 3: not comfortable, please let us know if you would like
Speaker 3: to leave now, Like you can leave or you can
Speaker 3: say just watch you don't like He's like explaining all
Speaker 3: the rules, like you don't have to participate, You don't
Speaker 3: have to participate, Please check in with your partners before touching.
Speaker 2: Anyone can please ask their permission, et cetera, et cetera,
Speaker 2: et cetera.
Speaker 3: Right, so now I'm like, okay, like I've never I
Speaker 3: have no revealing and like an environment where like it
Speaker 3: was so structured.
Speaker 2: So so then yeah, so that's happening. We start playing.
Speaker 3: I believe we started playing like True for dere Oh,
Speaker 3: we started playing True for Deer with like.
Speaker 2: Jungle blocks or whatever.
Speaker 3: So now people are getting lap dances, people just doing
Speaker 3: a bunch of stuff.
Speaker 2: But it wasn't I think that party.
Speaker 3: Was like an introductory party because people wouldn't really get
Speaker 3: it into it.
Speaker 2: Get into it. My little freaky ass, I like I
Speaker 2: started giving.
Speaker 3: So at one point, like a girl had gate like
Speaker 3: was sucking all my brust or whatever.
Speaker 2: That was like one of the deers.
Speaker 3: And then eventually like so now I'm aroused, right this
Speaker 3: girl don did this to me? So I had went
Speaker 3: So now I'm like sitting with my with my man
Speaker 3: or whatever, and I just like it in the head.
Speaker 3: Your boyfriend life was yeah, my boyfriend because everyone else
Speaker 3: was kind of like doing their own thing.
Speaker 2: For me, you was probably putting on.
Speaker 3: A girl so that my boyfriend like taps me to
Speaker 3: stop because like the host was like staring like boom
Speaker 3: staring at us or whatever. So he's like tacking me.
Speaker 3: And it was his first time, like period ever doing
Speaker 3: anything like this. So like I've had it, like I've
Speaker 3: had these like I guess, unstructured experiences, but he's never
Speaker 3: like done anything like this, so he was just like
Speaker 3: like stop stop, stops to stop.
Speaker 1: Or whatever in the case is was he uncomfortable or
Speaker 1: like nervous or.
Speaker 3: I guess he just didn't want someone staring at me,
Speaker 3: Like he's very protective over me, so I guess he
Speaker 3: was just like finding the moment he was like okay,
Speaker 3: like now stop because he was staring at you.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 3: But then that night, though we didn't like, we didn't
Speaker 3: play with anyone really like we we did have interactions
Speaker 3: with this one girl, like because she on my breast,
Speaker 3: I touched on her.
Speaker 2: But by this time people were like starting to like
Speaker 2: get into rooms and stuff. We were like we loved Yeah,
Speaker 2: I wasn't feeling it. Not that we weren't feeling it.
Speaker 2: We just just like, okay, we're done. Right, Well that's what.
Speaker 2: So that's what I often tell people.
Speaker 3: I'm like, you can be like very experienced, like you
Speaker 3: can go to these things all the time and just
Speaker 3: decided that you don't feel like a sax saurday, like right,
Speaker 3: like maybe you just.
Speaker 2: Wanted to talk to people. Maybe you just wanted to
Speaker 2: meet people, because the last one I went to I
Speaker 2: was like that I was just like, oh.
Speaker 3: I'm not really interested in like partying today, like I
Speaker 3: just wanted to talk mingle and then like we we
Speaker 3: we played a little bit, but not in the sense
Speaker 3: that we had like intercourse with like actual penetrys right
Speaker 3: right right.
Speaker 1: So how do you decide whether or not to attend one?
Speaker 1: Like are you like selective when it comes to certain
Speaker 1: play parties, or like do you go to them a lot?
Speaker 2: I wouldn't say a lot. I would maybe once a
Speaker 2: month somehow I skip a month.
Speaker 3: It's really whenever they pop up and get invited to
Speaker 3: one one that actually while I got invited, one that's
Speaker 3: coming up this Friday, or we're not going because we're
Speaker 3: on the best of space.
Speaker 1: Good Friday Vigilation.
Speaker 3: I didn't even realize that they planned them for Good Friday.
Speaker 1: Listen, don't even get me started. The time is going
Speaker 1: byself fast. I didn't even know it was Easter, child bro.
Speaker 3: I was surprised because once passed away today?
Speaker 2: Who else whatever?
Speaker 6: Right?
Speaker 2: All these holidays? But what you gonna call it? I
Speaker 2: feel like I typically go because everyone who invites me.
Speaker 3: I have like strangers to invite me or people who
Speaker 3: are just dressed meth to invite me.
Speaker 2: But the ones that typically goes so I feel like
Speaker 2: I've known the people for the little bit mm hm.
Speaker 2: So I'm just I'm comfortable.
Speaker 1: I'll be like, okay, whatever, And how do they invite you?
Speaker 1: Like they tell you and give you a link, or
Speaker 1: like they'd be e.
Speaker 3: Btes okay, yeah, I'd be right ulate e bites or
Speaker 3: just be like a text okay are we doing this? Typically,
Speaker 3: like I'll get like a text beforehand because some people
Speaker 3: like some people like to like here the people who
Speaker 3: are going to be there, not pare them, but like
Speaker 3: they want Like one time I went to one and
Speaker 3: he wanted like more like professional like people in the
Speaker 3: professional field there. So he had like only asked people
Speaker 3: who like were in a certain field. One time, I
Speaker 3: know they wanted mostly singles, like they wanted mostly singles
Speaker 3: or like the first time that I ever went to
Speaker 3: they did all people who have never like experienced that,
Speaker 3: so it was their first time experiencing it. And then
Speaker 3: he had a couple of experienced people to kind of
Speaker 3: like just teach people or talk to them and explain stuff.
Speaker 1: Then there's he sounds like he very like hands on
Speaker 1: with it.
Speaker 3: He's he like he plans them out like he really
Speaker 3: thinks about stuff he thinks about people's personality because he
Speaker 3: also doesn't sometimes people personality is just clash, right, so
Speaker 3: he keeps that in mind as well.
Speaker 2: He also takes like so when I go to play parties, I.
Speaker 3: Typically only mask with women, So he also keeps stuff
Speaker 3: like that in mind, like he has to balance that
Speaker 3: out because there's at least one woman who's not going
Speaker 3: to be participating with guys.
Speaker 2: So right, like there's a bunch of different stuff.
Speaker 1: Mm hm, Now how do you how do you approach
Speaker 1: safe sex practices such as condom use and regular testing.
Speaker 2: So I'm paranoid, right.
Speaker 3: No, because my friends make fun of me because like what
Speaker 3: time I got tested like damn near every other week,
Speaker 3: and it was just like, you know, that's pointless, right,
Speaker 3: And I was just like I don't care.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because that Sh'S like gonna show up, chaw. I
Speaker 1: think it takes a little minute for something to show up.
Speaker 2: That's okay, So let's just be like, well, I don't care,
Speaker 2: I'm out safe. So it's funny. So I used to
Speaker 2: I've grown up. I'll stop doing that, but.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna be honest with girls like I've never used
Speaker 3: like potential damn or anything like that.
Speaker 1: I want to ask you, like, I mean, I've never
Speaker 1: been with a girl before, but I feel like with girls,
Speaker 1: like do girls really use protection?
Speaker 2: In my opinion?
Speaker 3: No, Like I've never in all in all my living years, right,
Speaker 3: I have never seen girls use protection with each other.
Speaker 3: And I'm not saying that that's a good thing.
Speaker 2: Right, it's not.
Speaker 1: And you're also not saying that all girls don't do this.
Speaker 1: Some girls do use protection.
Speaker 3: Right, but I just never I've never seen it, right. So,
Speaker 3: and then it's so I'm gonna tell you something like
Speaker 3: now that I'm talking to you, I'm gonna say something silly.
Speaker 2: So like I'll I'll have a girl eat.
Speaker 3: Me out or whatever, no protection or whatever. I'll eat
Speaker 3: her out without protection. But then I'll make my boyfriend
Speaker 3: use a condom to penetrate.
Speaker 2: But the fluens have already.
Speaker 1: Swapped, Like Yo, bitches are annoying. Now you ate some box,
Speaker 1: but you want them to put a condom? You might
Speaker 1: tell let him at that ship raw.
Speaker 2: I don't know. In my head, I'm just like, oh.
Speaker 1: You, but he don't be saying like, oh, you need
Speaker 1: to put some of your mouth before you eat her out.
Speaker 1: But what what goes on the mouth like a plastics
Speaker 1: no goes on the china and you looking at watch
Speaker 1: something like covering it, but it's not the same. Does
Speaker 1: it feel good?
Speaker 2: I've never done that, I mean.
Speaker 1: Because I feel like the contact is so close, so
Speaker 1: we might as well just do it face to uh
Speaker 1: puss girl.
Speaker 2: I don't know. I just to me, I've never done it.
Speaker 2: Maybe I should be doing it. I need to look
Speaker 2: into it. This conversation has a light in me.
Speaker 1: I mean, we're here, now, how long you been doing this?
Speaker 1: We passed that point. So even though we do promote
Speaker 1: safe sex, y'all.
Speaker 2: So yes, please learn how to use it. That's so good, y'all,
Speaker 2: learn how to use that's so good.
Speaker 3: But we've had like people that we frequent, like we
Speaker 3: like needed a girl at one point, like we didn't
Speaker 3: use protection with her, like everyone would just get tested
Speaker 3: and we would have conversations about.
Speaker 1: But she was your girlfriend, right, but she was your girlfriend?
Speaker 2: Yeah, So with that.
Speaker 4: Like.
Speaker 3: I just with that, I feel like it was the
Speaker 3: three of us. We knew what we was doing, so
Speaker 3: we wouldn't use protection. And we've also had a unicorn
Speaker 3: like a girl who like she was like free to
Speaker 3: do whatever. And she would just keep open communication with us,
Speaker 3: like if she was, you know, seeing someone else at
Speaker 3: the time, or if she started having row sex with someone,
Speaker 3: she would just let us know.
Speaker 2: And we would move from there. So it's it's really
Speaker 2: communications are a really really big part of this. Yeah,
Speaker 2: to give it to talk to people.
Speaker 4: You know.
Speaker 1: I did an episode with someone, a young lady. She
Speaker 1: is known as the I want to say, as the
Speaker 1: Godmother of swingers, and the conversation, Yeah, the conversation was
Speaker 1: so amazing. It's like deep in the catalog, like I think,
Speaker 1: like episode not a little bit over one hundred. But
Speaker 1: she also said the same thing about how communication is
Speaker 1: very important because even though the body is saying one thing,
Speaker 1: the person can still be saying no, or be feeling
Speaker 1: uncomfortable or you know, just to make the situation lighter,
Speaker 1: especially if this is somebody first time doing it or
Speaker 1: whatever the case may be. Like, communication is like has
Speaker 1: been like the number one thing of these conversations when
Speaker 1: I have conversations about sex. So I definitely agree with
Speaker 1: you on that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And it's frequent conversations as well, because something that
Speaker 3: was okay last month might not be okay this month.
Speaker 7: Yeah, And just a lot of factors getting like you
Speaker 7: might get in a different space, something might have happened,
Speaker 7: Like so many different things come into play with this,
Speaker 7: and also like yourself, like as you're growing as a person,
Speaker 7: right I low key feel like I'm kind of like
Speaker 7: outgrowing up parties kind of now, like I don't get as.
Speaker 2: Much enjoyment out of them. M M. That's random. Like
Speaker 2: I'm not sure.
Speaker 3: I feel like I'm very much in like a settling
Speaker 3: down phase in my life right now.
Speaker 2: So it's like I just kind of want to like.
Speaker 3: Focus on one thing, but it's not I don't want
Speaker 3: to like stop going and I'm not. I'm also not
Speaker 3: saying that just because you're blocked in with your partner,
Speaker 3: that does they mean that you can't go see these
Speaker 3: things and these things make you less than But I
Speaker 3: think for me right now, in this moment of my life,
Speaker 3: I just kind of like want to focus on my partners,
Speaker 3: focus on our goals and kind of figure shit out.
Speaker 3: But at the same trump, we still talking about going
Speaker 3: to them. So it's like it's fay faty, but.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 3: It takes time, Like it takes time to go see
Speaker 3: these things. Work has to be put into it. They
Speaker 3: are often themed, so oftentimes they are the themes. So
Speaker 3: they got to go buy a costume or buy outfit
Speaker 3: and if you wanted. The girls who don't like to
Speaker 3: repeat off, it's like me, like you're constantly buying these outfits,
Speaker 3: but the thing like it's just another thing on my plate, right,
Speaker 3: So I think I'm just like, oh my, I don't
Speaker 3: really want to do this, like this weekend.
Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, that's money, right, Like I'm just like for.
Speaker 3: Something that like, I don't know, you can't I mean,
Speaker 3: I guess you can't recycle launch, right, but certain things
Speaker 3: I'm like.
Speaker 2: I mean I don't know.
Speaker 1: If you got a good night and that piece of drawers, baby,
Speaker 1: I might not be able to.
Speaker 2: Recycle those, right, Like all right, you see what I be.
Speaker 1: Right, Yeah, after a good night, I just have to
Speaker 1: throw them away, hang them up.
Speaker 2: Like you you served your purpose? Right?
Speaker 1: So are drugs and alcohol available at these parties?
Speaker 2: Yes?
Speaker 3: Yes, yes, yes, yes yes so typically so, but it
Speaker 3: depends on the party. I've seen parties where there's limits,
Speaker 3: Like so if if someone feels like you've been drinking
Speaker 3: too much or taking to drugs, you have to sit
Speaker 3: out or they'll like call you a uber home or something.
Speaker 2: I have seen that. Yeah, okay, people they want I
Speaker 2: love it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, the ones where there's lots and lots and lots
Speaker 3: of rules, like some people be like, oh, isn't it
Speaker 3: lots of fun?
Speaker 2: Know the fuck is not? I feel so safe.
Speaker 3: Yo, I'm having more fun because I'm so comfortable. Like
Speaker 3: I'm like, yo, shit, go last stuff. They have my back,
Speaker 3: like I know someone's gonna happen, right.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 1: What's so funny? I wonder if the host is really
Speaker 1: enjoying themselves because they have to be. They have to
Speaker 1: pretty much monitor the party and make sure that everybody
Speaker 1: is having a good time, but also everybody is safe
Speaker 1: and everything is consensual.
Speaker 2: Mm hmm.
Speaker 3: I've seen hosts that I feel like they look stressed.
Speaker 3: They don't not that they look stressed, but.
Speaker 1: I can see that they're busy, like that's a big responsibility.
Speaker 2: They're checking in on people every two seconds.
Speaker 3: They're they're making sure people have like enough like I
Speaker 3: don't know, bob or toys or whatever, like if things
Speaker 3: are being given out, Like they're constantly checking in on people.
Speaker 2: I've also seen hosts.
Speaker 3: I guess I maybe it's the more seasoned hosts, right
Speaker 3: that I've seen, like they're they're kind of more balanced,
Speaker 3: like they're able to play and kind of still watch
Speaker 3: the room. They'll tap into other people to also watch
Speaker 3: the room, so there'll be like several people that you
Speaker 3: can go to.
Speaker 2: Those are a little bit Yeah, those are.
Speaker 3: The company ones too, when there's multiple kind of like
Speaker 3: multiple holes because you don't just.
Speaker 2: Have to go to this one person and you feel
Speaker 2: like you're wading someone.
Speaker 1: Yeah, imagine you sucking the hose and you got the
Speaker 1: bust and nut and the nigga's down because he sees
Speaker 1: some ship that's about the.
Speaker 2: You'd be like, what the fun.
Speaker 1: Could you imagine?
Speaker 2: I've never seen that, but I would be so upset, like.
Speaker 1: You almost at the peak, like.
Speaker 3: I see some hocking sexual Oh my god.
Speaker 1: So wait, are the people that are attractive.
Speaker 3: So deef thesis right, So I've been to ones where
Speaker 3: I wasn't attractive to not.
Speaker 2: A damn soul. I've also so this.
Speaker 3: I feel like I've seen it's a fucking trend. No
Speaker 3: no shade to nobody.
Speaker 1: But all shade, all teeth.
Speaker 4: Oh.
Speaker 2: But I've noticed like sometimes I'm the youngest person in
Speaker 2: the room. There's a lot of like older people don't
Speaker 2: and like just to me, they're not that.
Speaker 1: Don't be an age just now, I mean, but what
Speaker 1: do you what do you mean by older? Like I
Speaker 1: don't so like because you're in your thirties.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm in my thirties. I want to say, like
Speaker 2: they'd be like fifties.
Speaker 3: Yeah, they'd be like fifties or late forties yeah, or
Speaker 3: mid forties. But remember I started going to these in
Speaker 3: my mid twenties, right, oh, mid twenties, going or being
Speaker 3: around people that's in their mid forties, I'm like, oh
Speaker 3: yeah old Like.
Speaker 1: M h, it ain't not attractive.
Speaker 2: Something of that.
Speaker 3: So I'm like, I know, I'm gon attracted this to
Speaker 3: like one host, one host's wife, like she's a little baddie.
Speaker 3: But then everybody else I'll be like yeah, like I'm not,
Speaker 3: like I'm not interested.
Speaker 1: How do they come like, because I feel like if
Speaker 1: I was going to one of these parties, like I'm
Speaker 1: gonna come on point, like I had to be the
Speaker 1: baddest bitch in the room when I step in, Like,
Speaker 1: like do they put effort in to themselves?
Speaker 2: So it just be like no, they definitely put effort
Speaker 2: into themselves.
Speaker 3: I've never I've never seen like someone who dressed flocky
Speaker 3: like everyone.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like people be having.
Speaker 3: Like they make up all okay, some people be like
Speaker 3: people be bare faced too. So I've been to like
Speaker 3: like extravagant like playing parties where people like are done
Speaker 3: to the tea, and I've also seen white people who
Speaker 3: like you know.
Speaker 2: Bare face or whatever comfortable but they still look like
Speaker 2: very presentable, right. Yeah. But I don't know. I just
Speaker 2: don't be attracted all the time.
Speaker 3: But then I have been to parties where it's like
Speaker 3: nothing but like just beautiful people like all around. But
Speaker 3: I want to say, more often than not, I find
Speaker 3: myself in parties where people aren't that attractive.
Speaker 2: Mm hmmm, I know you be tight. I do be
Speaker 2: tight because people like.
Speaker 1: While'll be here so you won't miss with any men
Speaker 1: only women only women. Yeah, but why not men.
Speaker 3: I'm just I'm very much like my man is my man,
Speaker 3: and that's like the only penis I want.
Speaker 2: Have I thought about it, yes, but I've never. I
Speaker 2: don't know.
Speaker 3: It's just it just doesn't do it for me, like
Speaker 3: I don't I can't imagine double penetration, so I can't
Speaker 3: imagine like I with another guy, all right, I also
Speaker 3: and then I just can't imagine like being with a
Speaker 3: guy outside my partner. And then and then I'm just
Speaker 3: like wildly attracted to women, but I'm not in a
Speaker 3: relationship with a women. But like let's say, let's say
Speaker 3: my partner with a woman, I probably I probably wouldn't
Speaker 3: keep dealing with women. I'm probably would deal with a
Speaker 3: man like at the parties.
Speaker 1: Oh, I get it, I get it.
Speaker 2: So I guess I just don't double that on the scene.
Speaker 1: All right, right, okay, I understand. So what kind of
Speaker 1: conversations do you typically have with other participants before engaging
Speaker 1: in sexual activity? Like do you do small talk with
Speaker 1: the bitch? Or like yeah, or y'all just get things popping?
Speaker 1: You know, she opened a leg up.
Speaker 3: Right, So so funny enough, I feel like I typically
Speaker 3: have conversations with people I'm not going to play with,
Speaker 3: but I might still find them attractive. But like, I
Speaker 3: don't know, I just rap. Sometimes conversation is very stimulating
Speaker 3: for me.
Speaker 2: Right, So as you know, you deep chaw, I am,
Speaker 2: I am a little deep.
Speaker 3: We got like a whole conversational like crystals and like
Speaker 3: all this other stuff, uh talking about like.
Speaker 1: Like when we first met, we was on the phone
Speaker 1: for like I think two hours talking about some of
Speaker 1: the deepest ship.
Speaker 2: We were talking about selling souls.
Speaker 3: Shurecause that's stimulates, right, so so then I could do that.
Speaker 2: But then, like I remember, like the last part of y'all.
Speaker 3: Went to like I just walked up to go. I
Speaker 3: was like, can I kiss you? And she was like yes,
Speaker 3: and then I kissed her and then we just we
Speaker 3: should started, but.
Speaker 1: We had no conversation, Like he was attracted to her,
Speaker 1: like you liked her, Yeah, I liked her.
Speaker 3: I liked her like she was like Amazonian, Like she
Speaker 3: was not tall, Like was she pretty?
Speaker 2: Yeah she was decent. I'm not she wasn't like, but.
Speaker 1: Don't be trying to flex on the show.
Speaker 2: Now, come on, now, I'm really not. I'm really not.
Speaker 2: I'm really not.
Speaker 3: But so I tell people this all the time, I'm
Speaker 3: less attracted to like physical appearance and more attracted to
Speaker 3: like confidence.
Speaker 2: So like walked into the room, Yes, oh my god,
Speaker 2: that turned me on. So clearly give me a napkin
Speaker 2: sis sorry about it.
Speaker 1: I can tell Yeah, she get a little fluster, but
Speaker 1: she was gonna see I gave you. You end up
Speaker 1: kissing her.
Speaker 3: Randed up kissing should have given me like a lap dance.
Speaker 3: We start going to each other's b us. She like
Speaker 3: play with my jina cous see whatever was like eating
Speaker 3: me out. It was like it was the time, but
Speaker 3: we didn't really talk like it was. I didn't get
Speaker 3: her number at that end, like we might never see
Speaker 3: each other ever again.
Speaker 1: I was just about to ask you that, like do
Speaker 1: you keep in contact with the people that you meet
Speaker 1: or it's just a one time thank you ma'am and
Speaker 1: were good.
Speaker 3: For me personally Half the time, I'll keep on contact
Speaker 3: with these people, not only the people that typically keep
Speaker 3: on contact are like hosts.
Speaker 1: Okay, well obviously yeah right, but like.
Speaker 3: I'm typically like friends with the wholes and something type
Speaker 3: of capacity, like we can keep key and be on
Speaker 3: the phone.
Speaker 2: I've never I've never made a friend with anyone party,
Speaker 2: but I've seen people do it, like people make friends.
Speaker 1: Are you open to that or nah?
Speaker 2: I am I'm just not a very social person. You
Speaker 2: think I'm social, I'm really not. You're social with me,
Speaker 2: but I like you, but I like you.
Speaker 1: So what kind of impact if any has attending sex
Speaker 1: parties had on your sexual preferences or desires.
Speaker 2: See, I don't really like this question.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna tell you why because I feel like my
Speaker 3: preferences is.
Speaker 2: What makes me go to the parties, not the other
Speaker 2: way around. M hmm.
Speaker 3: Like i feel like I've always been into king, Like
Speaker 3: I've always been into the like bed bds, some stuff
Speaker 3: like bondage.
Speaker 2: I'm very submissius, so I've always been into that.
Speaker 3: And I think because I've always been into that, I like,
Speaker 3: I look for things that relate to those right and
Speaker 3: like and parties came with that. So I've never went
Speaker 3: to a party and was like, oh, like now now
Speaker 3: I'm suddenly interested in this thing.
Speaker 2: Like no, I've always been interested and now I'm not
Speaker 2: a party learning more about it, you know what I'm saying, right, Yeah,
Speaker 2: but I wonder I'm maybe apparently I've turned a girl out.
Speaker 2: I wanted them, so she told you good.
Speaker 3: Yeah, she was like, I've never been with a girl before,
Speaker 3: like this is my first son. And then her best
Speaker 3: friend like confirmed it because her best friend was also
Speaker 3: there and she was like, yeah.
Speaker 2: I've never seen her. What she what you do? I
Speaker 2: ain't do shit.
Speaker 3: I really I promised you I'm just talking. That was
Speaker 3: one of the girls I was just talking to, Like,
Speaker 3: I was just talking to her, and then she started,
Speaker 3: like she started kissing.
Speaker 2: She did not ask, She did not ask. I mean,
Speaker 2: you didn't stop though, I didn't stop. But she had me.
Speaker 1: You're aggressive, I'm like this, but she probably was nervous.
Speaker 2: Maybe maybe, but.
Speaker 3: Like I could also tell that she had a girl before,
Speaker 3: because even like right, she like bit my vagina.
Speaker 2: She did it. She did good.
Speaker 1: You should have punched it.
Speaker 8: I was like, it's okay, oh my god, I mean
Speaker 8: she lying.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry. Anybody that's been with I feel like if
Speaker 1: you if this is your first time being with a girl,
Speaker 1: like I'm not eating box.
Speaker 2: On the first time, Okay, that's you. She lying?
Speaker 1: She being a girl before.
Speaker 3: I don't think so, because any girl would have told her,
Speaker 3: please don't ever bite, like I mean, actually, let me
Speaker 3: not say that, because people have different preferences.
Speaker 2: Maybe there are people a true like the deep bet.
Speaker 1: The first time she was ready to go.
Speaker 8: Down, yes, job, yes, oh my gosh, but you got
Speaker 8: a party like this was random, Like you know what I.
Speaker 1: Want to ask you? Where are the parties at? Like
Speaker 1: is it that people houses or clubs.
Speaker 3: Okay, people, I believe I've never been to town, but
Speaker 3: I believe there's clubs in New York. Yeah, you know,
Speaker 3: there's like houses dedicated to it in New York. Like
Speaker 3: I've heard of them, and people haven't buying me.
Speaker 2: I just haven't gone yet. But and then some people
Speaker 2: have it in.
Speaker 3: Their houses or in their apartment, and some people runs
Speaker 3: house spaces. I like it when people runs out spaces,
Speaker 3: but it's pretty like people like do it all right,
Speaker 3: the fancy ones.
Speaker 1: I do want to go to a club. I just
Speaker 1: want to go and just see it because I feel
Speaker 1: like I, you know, just from doing research and like
Speaker 1: talking to so many people and having so many different
Speaker 1: type of friends in my life. Like I heard the
Speaker 1: clubs be like popping and not even on like some
Speaker 1: and not even on some sex shit, Like it's just
Speaker 1: be a vibe there, like it's really like a legit party.
Speaker 3: No, I've heard the same. I just they be costing bread.
Speaker 3: O D they costing bread. That's that's why I don't
Speaker 3: be going.
Speaker 1: And if I'm paying that much money, I've been a
Speaker 1: bust of nut.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and some of them you need like memberships.
Speaker 1: I'm like, that is I heard that too. Facts, facts
Speaker 1: you need like a membership. So do you have any
Speaker 1: type of boundaries? I know you said earlier that you don't,
Speaker 1: but you so you don't have no boundaries boundaries when
Speaker 1: you go into these clubs or parties.
Speaker 2: For my partner, you're saying like rules.
Speaker 1: No for you, Like do you have batteries for yourself?
Speaker 1: Or like.
Speaker 2: What do you mean by a boundary?
Speaker 1: Like do you have any like like are you pretty
Speaker 1: much open to anything or do you have like certain
Speaker 1: things that you wouldn't do, Like I know you're not
Speaker 1: really interested in men.
Speaker 3: So yeah, so that's one, like I don't mess I
Speaker 3: won't mess with a man unless I'm single, unless i'm
Speaker 3: dating or woman at the time. But not really, it's
Speaker 3: really just the moved that I'm in for that night, right,
Speaker 3: because like I said, like something I've gone and sometimes
Speaker 3: I don't participate in much and then I've gone and
Speaker 3: we participated in a lot.
Speaker 2: But it really depends on my mood.
Speaker 1: Mm hmm.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And what was the best night that you had at
Speaker 1: a party?
Speaker 2: The best night I was I was with my partner
Speaker 2: and we have went and we met this girl.
Speaker 3: She's really pretty. She had a fat ass. I like ass.
Speaker 3: I like titties too.
Speaker 2: You like body? I like body. I do. I'm very like.
Speaker 1: Visual Yeah a body girl, so like body, YadA yaddy.
Speaker 2: So yeah.
Speaker 3: So this girl she had her ass was fucking around
Speaker 3: in fact, and she had like nice titties and nice
Speaker 3: nibbles and.
Speaker 2: Child. I love to be like wow, but like, wow,
Speaker 2: you sound like our friend straight up go ahead.
Speaker 3: It's funny because people don't. People believe me, Like they
Speaker 3: be like, you're not fine. I'm like, I might like
Speaker 3: women more than I.
Speaker 1: No, I definitely think you like women more than men.
Speaker 2: I think I do too.
Speaker 1: I think when it comes to family, it's all about
Speaker 1: your partner being a man. But when it comes to
Speaker 1: like that intimacy and like the overall feeling and stuff
Speaker 1: and the attraction, it'd be women for you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I do, like you know, when I'm on the street,
Speaker 3: I rarely ever check out men.
Speaker 2: I'm always checking out women.
Speaker 1: Like, but women are pretty to look at though, Yeah.
Speaker 3: I mean, but I feel like straight women or like
Speaker 3: there's also somebody sexual woman. I feel like sometimes like
Speaker 3: they be looking at me, like I've heard like my
Speaker 3: homeegirls be like, oh, look at him, he's so fine
Speaker 3: look at each other, and I just like, I look.
Speaker 1: At I ain't seen the fine nigga yet. Really, I
Speaker 1: haven't seen the find again so long.
Speaker 2: Oh maybe man are slacking out here.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean it's I've been seeing a lot of pretty women.
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, that's a beautiful woman. She's mad pretty.
Speaker 1: But I have not seen a niggy when I be like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, nigga's fine, Like, oh that's unfortunate.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you've seen any other side. I haven't seen one
Speaker 2: in a while. After the last party I went to,
Speaker 2: I've seen the fine one. He was fine. I was
Speaker 2: staring at him like I with the with the Amazonian goddess.
Speaker 2: It was both of them. I was like, damn, I
Speaker 2: look like God, not zeus. Oh my god.
Speaker 1: Okay, so the best night. So he saw Shorty saw Shorty.
Speaker 3: She was interacting with my man at first or whatever.
Speaker 3: They was talking, they had started kissing or whatever.
Speaker 2: So a real nigga pulled up.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's like, step aside, nigga.
Speaker 3: So I come over all, keep tea or whatever, because
Speaker 3: I'm also I'm not I wouldn't consider myself sexy.
Speaker 2: I'm very like cute, like and goofy.
Speaker 3: So I feel like that's another thing why people be
Speaker 3: comfortable abound because I'm just a google.
Speaker 2: So I go around like, oh, like can I have
Speaker 2: some two or whatever? I said something corny and then
Speaker 2: she was like, of course, and then.
Speaker 3: She did the she did like the States palm, like
Speaker 3: you know when like they got me by the kind
Speaker 3: of things and they.
Speaker 2: Pull you and they she did it. She did what
Speaker 2: she did it to me.
Speaker 3: So we started kissing or whatever, and so we had
Speaker 3: like some toys with us, and like it was just
Speaker 3: to night, like it was just I don't know, the
Speaker 3: energy was real good like and she was just beautiful.
Speaker 3: So that was my best night.
Speaker 1: Now, have you had any negative experiences and if so,
Speaker 1: how did you handle it?
Speaker 3: The most negative experience was I was at a party
Speaker 3: with my partner, and my partner, like me and him
Speaker 3: were not in a good space, so like I kept
Speaker 3: looking at him and I was just like disgusted. As
Speaker 3: your partner, my partner, I was looking at him and
Speaker 3: I was disgusted. So I didn't really have fun that night.
Speaker 3: And so I suggest, like, if you're in.
Speaker 2: A bad space with your person, y'all should not go.
Speaker 2: Y'all should not go because that's shit.
Speaker 3: You're gonna think like you can handle it and it's
Speaker 3: gonna be fine. But like and granted we've been to
Speaker 3: these things already, so it's not like, oh I was
Speaker 3: uncomfortable with something happening. It was just because we were
Speaker 3: in a bad space. I was like, like, I like
Speaker 3: I want to I'm like sucking piece of shit.
Speaker 2: Shit. That was like my worst night.
Speaker 3: But then there was another one. I guess it was
Speaker 3: just a funny night. Like we was having a three
Speaker 3: somewhere a girl and.
Speaker 2: He just couldn't get hard for her. But she was beautiful.
Speaker 2: The girl was beautiful, like and she's small bay nothing,
Speaker 2: but like like no, because you know, like sometimes you
Speaker 2: could be beautiful, but if you smell.
Speaker 9: I mean yeah when twadden right, like day yeah, but
Speaker 9: he yeah, he couldn't get hard like with her specifically,
Speaker 9: like because when he would like switch back over to me,
Speaker 9: like he would get aroused again and then like he
Speaker 9: would try to like mess with her and like specifically
Speaker 9: with like penetration, Like he just did not.
Speaker 2: Say hard for her, And I was like, I was like,
Speaker 2: I'm like, hmm, what's happening here?
Speaker 1: Like, right, does he enjoy these parties.
Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't know anymore.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because I feel like y'all go to these a
Speaker 1: lot or y'all been going to these for a certain
Speaker 1: amount of years, and especially with that situation like you
Speaker 1: got too fine bitches in front of you, But that
Speaker 1: might be a lot though.
Speaker 2: I definitely especially for not sweat because I'm he called
Speaker 2: me the quote unqute for anyone. Like he's like, Yo,
Speaker 2: you always want to do some ship. You always like
Speaker 2: doing all these sexual things things that might be.
Speaker 3: But he's never expressed that, Like he's never he's never
Speaker 3: said those words like oh this is intendating or I'm
Speaker 3: not comfortable. He'll say stuff like oh, like I don't
Speaker 3: need to go to these things, like I do it
Speaker 3: like for you because I don't you enjoy them. But yeah,
Speaker 3: because he he definitely like he's never like I was
Speaker 3: his first street, so like he's never had a three before.
Speaker 3: So it's so interesting though, because that that's something I
Speaker 3: would say, like people to all, I don't want three songs.
Speaker 3: I love to be I had love to have two
Speaker 3: bitches and oh I have this, and but like when
Speaker 3: you really put the pressure on these niggas, like put
Speaker 3: them in the situation.
Speaker 2: I'm like, oh, you was asking for this right though?
Speaker 1: Be real limp, Okay, they can't.
Speaker 2: Or they panic, or they just don't know what to do.
Speaker 2: They don't know.
Speaker 1: Do you think he's gonna stop going with you soon?
Speaker 2: Or I don't know because I think he's more into
Speaker 2: it now.
Speaker 1: Mm yeah, why he's in it, I don't know because.
Speaker 2: Not asking me.
Speaker 3: But before it would be me asking him, like it
Speaker 3: would be like, oh, like you like, has any come up?
Speaker 2: Like has anyone hit you up? Now he's the one
Speaker 2: asking me like has anyone hit you up? Or are
Speaker 2: you interested in going? So I feel like he's getting amble.
Speaker 3: And the last one we went to he was like
Speaker 3: on his own, like he wasn't like I feel like
Speaker 3: before he would like stay kind of like near my hip,
Speaker 3: like he always wanted to be.
Speaker 2: Next to me, And now he's just like exploring.
Speaker 1: So I'm like, Okay, does that bother you?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 10: I just don't like, don't leave me completely alone, like
Speaker 10: right unless we like, unless we have like a conversation
Speaker 10: like me, if you dip off into a room to
Speaker 10: like have sex with someone, that's fine, Like one time,
Speaker 10: he like the thoughts that like have a conversation with someone.
Speaker 3: And left me alone and I'm just like really good,
Speaker 3: like right, like wrong with you. But that's just more
Speaker 3: so like I'm very much like I like being protected.
Speaker 3: Like so it's just like, oh, you wouldn't protective like
Speaker 3: you would to make sure you wouldn't make it what
Speaker 3: are kidnapped?
Speaker 2: Like kidnapping? I'm not dramatic. I'm a dramatic.
Speaker 3: I'm like, I'm looking up for me in a truck
Speaker 3: and you would not have no because you was not
Speaker 3: in the room or you I wasn't in distance.
Speaker 2: Of I was like, that's something I would say. I'm
Speaker 2: mad dramatic.
Speaker 1: So wait, so do y'all have any rules as a
Speaker 1: couple or it's pretty much like he can just do
Speaker 1: what he wants.
Speaker 2: He can do whatever he wants. I'm a watch like
Speaker 2: I like to watch. I love to watch.
Speaker 3: So I actually prefer when he he doesn't like this this,
Speaker 3: I will say he doesn't like because he always.
Speaker 2: Wants me involved. He's like come here, like he was
Speaker 2: like come here, come here, Like I'm just like a
Speaker 2: lot like yeah, like I want to see my person
Speaker 2: in action, and I also like seeing my person being pleased.
Speaker 2: So well, I'm asking what do you ask me? You
Speaker 2: asked me if there are rules?
Speaker 1: There any rules?
Speaker 2: Look, you got me, Yeah, she reminiscent Chia. But rules. Yeah,
Speaker 2: so I don't mess with men. He also wouldn't want
Speaker 2: me messing with the man, right, which won't call it?
Speaker 1: You okay with him kissing the bitch? Yeah, because you know,
Speaker 1: some people don't like their man kissing another woman because
Speaker 1: that's very intimate.
Speaker 2: No, I don't mind. Like he's given girls head in
Speaker 2: front of me.
Speaker 3: He's kissed girls, so really, I guess for me, the
Speaker 3: really only thing is you got to use a condom
Speaker 3: for penetration.
Speaker 1: Does he like to use condoms for penetration?
Speaker 3: Well?
Speaker 2: Other people?
Speaker 3: Because like I feel like he has more fun when
Speaker 3: we're dating someone, like when we have our own person,
Speaker 3: because he can fuck them wrong like those girls, he
Speaker 3: can walk wrong.
Speaker 2: I feel like he prefers that. But yeah, I don't know.
Speaker 2: I just I don't like the idea of you fucking
Speaker 2: somebody wrong that you met tonight. Again, I don't like that.
Speaker 1: Just now, you know, you sound like a little hypocrite, Now.
Speaker 2: I know, I know, because we.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, he's gonna find her a professional
Speaker 6: here and yo, crying.
Speaker 2: I've got a probviously, I have not the pro is
Speaker 2: going to talk as coming from my guy. Yeah, because
Speaker 2: this bitch got the fucking nerve, y'all. It's you crying
Speaker 2: for me. Oh man, I'm crying. Oh man? Yeah, alright, man,
Speaker 2: come on else got it together? All right?
Speaker 3: Now?
Speaker 1: Do you think that attendany sex parties parties with your
Speaker 1: partner affected your relationship in any way?
Speaker 2: Well, we were going on to them like frequently. I
Speaker 2: feel like it made it better.
Speaker 3: I feel like it made it so much better because
Speaker 3: I feel like our communication wasn't always so great and
Speaker 3: it forced us to be better communicators. And we were
Speaker 3: also learning like more about.
Speaker 2: Like sex right together. Yeah, And I don't think I
Speaker 2: don't know how everybody but for me, I don't.
Speaker 3: I wasn't really having those conversations like when I get
Speaker 3: into a relationship, I'm not really asking like I mean,
Speaker 3: I guess like I'll ask like little stuff like.
Speaker 2: This feel good, but I'm never like, hey, like what
Speaker 2: area of your body do you like to touch?
Speaker 3: Or like even like paying attention to cause a lot
Speaker 3: of it is like this sensual play where like you're
Speaker 3: really exploring people's bodies like, and I'm also like learning
Speaker 3: from Oh, I guess I kind of release to your
Speaker 3: question from earlier.
Speaker 2: But I'm also learning, like I'm learning from other women,
Speaker 2: like things that I take away from the parties, right
Speaker 2: cause like I don't know, like I never.
Speaker 3: Like, I like, I'm goofy, so like I've given lap
Speaker 3: dances as a joke, like let me radimly give you
Speaker 3: a lap dance while you're watching the game.
Speaker 2: But like these girls, like I used to, I don't
Speaker 2: love watching them, love watching them.
Speaker 3: They look like strippers, Like they look like professional fucking
Speaker 3: dancers sometimes, like the way that they was giving you
Speaker 3: lat dances and being so sensual.
Speaker 2: So I pick that's something I learned from them.
Speaker 3: I'm like, oh, like that's not just something I could
Speaker 3: do when I'm being goofy and joking around, like.
Speaker 1: That's a partner everyday life.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, like I never I never even thought of it.
Speaker 1: I know how to tap into my sensual side now
Speaker 1: if I want something. But I think this also just
Speaker 1: plays into with your charisma or just being witty or
Speaker 1: just being a woman, like just tapping into your woman's
Speaker 1: side and like you know, get doing what you gotta do.
Speaker 1: Get what you want.
Speaker 3: I started picking up so many different steps, like touching
Speaker 3: someone with like just the very tip of your nail
Speaker 3: and just going up and like that's not something like
Speaker 3: I used to do that with my finger, but like
Speaker 3: with the very edge of it for your nail.
Speaker 2: Right, wonder if apparently, like would I never do that?
Speaker 1: I feel like if I'm like in a relationship and
Speaker 1: I like that's my nigga, Like I feel like I
Speaker 1: try my best to like ask questions like what do
Speaker 1: you like? Like what turns you on? Like what can
Speaker 1: I do to make you more happier when it comes
Speaker 1: to you know anything?
Speaker 3: Oh, nigga, I'm self fished because I was I was
Speaker 3: doing before attending these parties.
Speaker 2: Now I do like now really before, No, I'm clearly
Speaker 2: you gonna get what you get.
Speaker 3: Because I also feel like I'm very I'm very confident
Speaker 3: in my sex game. Like I'll say, so, I'm just like,
Speaker 3: why am I asking you what feels good when everything
Speaker 3: I've done already?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 1: I think you know what's so funny? You make a
Speaker 1: good point because I'm the same way. But I feel
Speaker 1: like as I started to get older and started to
Speaker 1: understand the value in communication, that's when I started to
Speaker 1: do it, because I didn't always do it because I
Speaker 1: always feel like I'm the gift nigga, Like it don't
Speaker 1: get no better than this, But I feel like right,
Speaker 1: But I feel like, you know, when you get older
Speaker 1: and you start to explore things and you become more
Speaker 1: not sexually active, but like more what's the word, when
Speaker 1: you're like really into like exploring your sexuality. I feel
Speaker 1: like that's when I started to be like, oh, so
Speaker 1: what do you like or like what's your fantasy and
Speaker 1: stuff like that.
Speaker 2: Maybe it's something that comes with age.
Speaker 1: I think so, because as you get older, your body
Speaker 1: gets older, you start to want to do more things.
Speaker 1: Are you more both to different things or you know,
Speaker 1: you be with different people and they like different things,
Speaker 1: they introduce you to some things and get that thing banging.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I feel like something with the parties, they're
Speaker 3: they're showing both of us because like if he's not
Speaker 3: that experience because also girl, like I said, I'm learning
Speaker 3: so much, Like men be thinking they're so experienced until
Speaker 3: they realize that they not so experienced. Like just because
Speaker 3: you've had sex with multiple people does not mean that
Speaker 3: you're experience, right, it's the act of actually trying new
Speaker 3: things and being comfortable with your skin.
Speaker 1: And also knowing what that person like, Yes, because everybody's
Speaker 1: body is yes. And trust for sure, because if I
Speaker 1: FUX with you and I trust you, like we can
Speaker 1: do whatever. Like because sex is supposed to be fun like. So,
Speaker 1: but I feel like when you don't have that that communication,
Speaker 1: that trust, that's a dub. Like when I trust you,
Speaker 1: I don't know, we might have to we might have
Speaker 1: to get a little test, a little pregnancy test.
Speaker 2: I'm having a good time I'm having.
Speaker 1: But that's not supposed to be It's supposed to be
Speaker 1: fun like, but it's definitely involved trust and communication for sure.
Speaker 2: Mm hmm.
Speaker 3: Big the two biggest things, two biggest, biggest things. Like
Speaker 3: you also trust that your partner has your bag, yeah,
Speaker 3: that they have your best intentions at heart, Like you
Speaker 3: guys need to communicate what's okay and what's not okay?
Speaker 1: Right, So, how can someone find out about sex parties?
Speaker 1: And what's the process for attended one?
Speaker 3: So and so when I first first started, like that,
Speaker 3: that very first one that we went to, like we
Speaker 3: didn't even know right, right, But now there's like all
Speaker 3: these different.
Speaker 1: Apps so I feel like it's so easy to find, right.
Speaker 3: It's it's much easier to find now, right, I'm actually
Speaker 3: trying to find the name of one of that I
Speaker 3: can't remember.
Speaker 1: The we ain't doing no free promo.
Speaker 2: Oh, we're not doing free promo.
Speaker 3: Well, there's apps, y'all find the apps also, regular datating apps.
Speaker 2: Just put it in your profile. People will hit you up,
Speaker 2: like if you just put it in your bio. So yeah,
Speaker 2: you could do it that way.
Speaker 3: And then when you actually go to one, you're gonna
Speaker 3: meet people again networking.
Speaker 1: Just putting yourself out there, mm hmm.
Speaker 2: You're gonna find out.
Speaker 3: And then just being able to like open honest communication
Speaker 3: with people when you're out because, like I said, I
Speaker 3: was in a whole nother country and.
Speaker 2: The things that transpire, but we was also having like open,
Speaker 2: candid communication and conversation. So mm hmm.
Speaker 1: Conversation rules the nation. Yes, And what is your advice
Speaker 1: for maintaining privacy and discretion when attending sex parties?
Speaker 3: So I know we for a long time we use
Speaker 3: fake names, but we stopped doing that because I don't
Speaker 3: tell you why. At these things, everyone's kind of on
Speaker 3: the same page. Nobody wants their business all. I'll a
Speaker 3: lot of us have like careers, like career careers, right,
Speaker 3: so like again, like phones do not feel allowed, Like
Speaker 3: you can't take any pictures, you can't take videos. A
Speaker 3: lot of it is what happens here stays here. So
Speaker 3: people aren't saying like, oh, I've seen Vanessa and George
Speaker 3: a party, like you don't do that. Like if you
Speaker 3: do have conversations about that, you're not mentioning it. You're
Speaker 3: not really mentioning the exact location.
Speaker 2: And things for that.
Speaker 1: Can you get banned if that was to happen.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you can.
Speaker 3: Like so someone like let's say you took a picture
Speaker 3: without someone's it like shows up. You will not fee allowed,
Speaker 3: you will not be Yeah, you're not invited to another party.
Speaker 2: But I've never in the four years, I've never seen
Speaker 2: that happen, Like it's.
Speaker 3: Never gone out of hand where someone's trying to host
Speaker 3: something or tell people's business.
Speaker 1: Mm hmm. And what is your advice that you would
Speaker 1: give to someone who's curious about attending their first sex party?
Speaker 1: Because when I put this up on my page on Instagram,
Speaker 1: when I tell you, the dms were crazy. Everybody was
Speaker 1: super excited. About this conversation. Really, I said, just give
Speaker 1: a PHGF the dark child.
Speaker 2: I'll be careful. You're the AGA eighteen careful out here.
Speaker 3: But definitely have a conversation with yourself right like, really
Speaker 3: think about like what am I going to be comfortable with?
Speaker 2: What I am not going to be comfortable with. Definitely
Speaker 2: have opening, candid communication with the host. Let them know
Speaker 2: what you're comfortable with and not comfortable.
Speaker 3: With, because they'll put you in areas where you're going
Speaker 3: to feel the most comfortable, and they'll introduce you to
Speaker 3: people who's going to make sure that you feel comfortable.
Speaker 2: So let's say the first time that you attend, you
Speaker 2: just want to watch.
Speaker 3: Just make that known at the beginning of the night
Speaker 3: or tell the host beforehand. They'll make sure that that's
Speaker 3: all that happens. And if they see you participating in something,
Speaker 3: they're going to check on you. They want to say, hey,
Speaker 3: I know you had.
Speaker 2: Said you just wanted to watch. Are you comfortable right now?
Speaker 2: And then you know you can speak to them.
Speaker 3: You can also have like a cold like a little
Speaker 3: co word beforehand that's made just in case, like because
Speaker 3: some people also they're not what's the word I want,
Speaker 3: they're easily influenced sometimes, like they have a hard time
Speaker 3: saying no, so those.
Speaker 1: Co words are helpful for that, or they don't want
Speaker 1: to be the person that saying no.
Speaker 3: Exactly, So it's helpful to like check the whole your
Speaker 3: your host, the host is your best friend.
Speaker 2: The host is going to make sure that you're good.
Speaker 3: So I definitely recommend that you get close with your
Speaker 3: host during your first party and then you know, go
Speaker 3: there with open session, have fun.
Speaker 2: I also don't suggest that you do a bunch of
Speaker 2: drugs and get drunk.
Speaker 3: I don't suggest that I think that you're you're your
Speaker 3: best when you're sober, especially when it's your first time.
Speaker 2: You know, if you want to.
Speaker 3: Drink a little wine and get like a little tips,
Speaker 3: that's yeah, Like if you want to get the bus,
Speaker 3: that's fine. But I don't suggest you get drunk or
Speaker 3: in coherent, because I don't want anyone doing something and
Speaker 3: they wake up the next morning they regret what happened
Speaker 3: or they feel that they was taking advantage of. So
Speaker 3: you want to you know, you want to be clear,
Speaker 3: clear minded. And then some of these parties, you know,
Speaker 3: people do do a lot of drugs and people's not
Speaker 3: really want to do it.
Speaker 2: It's great when they are, but sometimes they don't.
Speaker 1: What type of drugs are you doing?
Speaker 2: It's a lot of weird I've seen. I've seen cold,
Speaker 2: I've seen molly. I've seen someone taking perks before.
Speaker 1: Oh, nigga, not coming off no perks now, right, he.
Speaker 2: Right, nothing.
Speaker 11: I've seen like people drinking a lot, not that I know, girl, right,
Speaker 11: go ahead, now, that's it.
Speaker 2: That was it. I really don't know, y'all. Let me
Speaker 2: stop playing with y'all. Give these women a feel war.
Speaker 1: Yeah, listen, that's the whole purpose of these conversations, because
Speaker 1: you don't want to go into a situation blindly think
Speaker 1: you're about to have a good time and you just
Speaker 1: like what the fuck is going on? Because people do
Speaker 1: do a lot of drugs like these. We're not all
Speaker 1: these parties, but people like to have a good time.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And honestly, I haven't been to many parties where
Speaker 3: people are getting like like Odie hot, like right, It's
Speaker 3: been a few.
Speaker 2: I have seen it, but not most of them.
Speaker 3: Know.
Speaker 1: Most of the time people are just walking FARSI. Yeah, yeah, Well,
Speaker 1: I think this was an amazing conversation. It was definitely fun.
Speaker 1: To my guests, thank you so much for being a
Speaker 1: part of the Professional Homegirl Podcast, and to the listeners.
Speaker 1: If you have any questions, comments or concerns or you
Speaker 1: want to say hey girl, Hey, please make sure to
Speaker 1: email me at hello at the PSHG podcast dot com
Speaker 1: And until next time, everyone.
Speaker 3: Later.
Speaker 1: The Professional Homegirl Podcast is a production of the Black
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