Speaker 1: Start uf dot up, Start up, Brooklyn Boy, Start up,
Speaker 1: Brooklyn Boys. That data they making noise data dot up
Speaker 1: Episode one. This is the Brooklyn Boys podcast coming to
Speaker 1: you in sterri Areo sort of unless you're on a
Speaker 1: single Bluetooth speaker, and then I can't help you. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's not our fault. We have got nothing to do
Speaker 1: with that. That that's just a single speaker then, or
Speaker 1: if you have one year button, you're not in stereo,
Speaker 1: you're in mono. Now, on the last podcast, we had
Speaker 1: a lot of problems with the audio. Okay, this time
Speaker 1: I think that we figured it out. Okay, got Brody
Speaker 1: here right, yeah, I'm here, Yeah, and I'm over here. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I think we're even We got good love. Are you
Speaker 1: recording us on two tracks? Because last time you put
Speaker 1: us on the same track and then you couldn't adjust
Speaker 1: the No, we were in the same track. But I'm looking,
Speaker 1: I'm monitoring meters physical meters. Okay, So people accused me
Speaker 1: last episode of sabotaging it. Yes, you did to make
Speaker 1: me sound superior because I'm louder. Okay, now that was
Speaker 1: just an error in the audio. Now I am I
Speaker 1: You have you jacked all the way up, Brodie, you
Speaker 1: are literally pinning my needle and I've put myself at half.
Speaker 1: Hold on, hold on, hold on, We've already established this.
Speaker 1: You tried to pin your own needle that has nothing
Speaker 1: to do with me, and you know what, I don't
Speaker 1: need you jacking me, do not me. We are even now, okay,
Speaker 1: trying to scream at the top of your lungs and
Speaker 1: I'll steer at my top of your long No this
Speaker 1: when we get some level, child on, No even, it's
Speaker 1: not even you need to be. I need to be
Speaker 1: louder than you this week, so it's even you can even.
Speaker 1: That's right, I'm breaking the first rule of free dessert.
Speaker 1: That's right. You can't be like, okay, now we're good. No,
Speaker 1: we're not good. But then people are gonna be going
Speaker 1: up and down with the knob. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: We don't want them to go up and down on
Speaker 1: the knob like the volume again. You and you you,
Speaker 1: you try to go up and down with your knob.
Speaker 1: Hop right now, I can tell you that we we
Speaker 1: both sound great. Well, I sound good. I sound better
Speaker 1: because you know me. I have the four dred sixty
Speaker 1: dollar piece of equipment here that you accuse me of.
Speaker 1: Every freaking week the price goes up. I don't know
Speaker 1: what you're talking about, but a lot of people tweeted
Speaker 1: at us, wondering why you spend so much money when
Speaker 1: it was right Well, at the end of the day,
Speaker 1: I sound good, okay, Now, the only difference is is
Speaker 1: the mic quality, and I can't you know that's the
Speaker 1: difference between yourto do snowball microphone and my insert price
Speaker 1: here inflation, go of what the system I have? Right? Yeah?
Speaker 1: And how much party? How much I pay for this microphone?
Speaker 1: Six million the g d P of Sweden's Okay, well,
Speaker 1: good anyway, we got that out of the way, but
Speaker 1: hopefully we sound better to you this week. You still
Speaker 1: got that little little clicking noise, but we'll figure that
Speaker 1: out another time. I think that's your slow internet. It's
Speaker 1: not internet. First, Well, internet doesn't click. I've never heard
Speaker 1: that my microphone is clicking. That's not a thing. I
Speaker 1: don't hear any clicking. I'm monitoring the same audio you're monitoring.
Speaker 1: There's no clicking. The program of music fear is called
Speaker 1: clean feed. Now, is it is that a Is that
Speaker 1: ironic that that you're coming in with clicks. Yes, it's gorgeous. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I was changing. It's just gonna say. We we got
Speaker 1: two more tweets this week of people who are now
Speaker 1: listening to the other podcast that you recommended over and
Speaker 1: over again because they talk about sex or she talks
Speaker 1: about but you can't, you can't avoid it. It's Earporne, like,
Speaker 1: how do you not listen to that podcast? All right?
Speaker 1: Just stop driving people away? And one of their episodes
Speaker 1: that I think they actually accused guys, they're like, you, guys,
Speaker 1: you know you're sitting there jerking off to listen to
Speaker 1: us that tell our filthy, raunchy stories. Well, I'd like
Speaker 1: to hope nobody's doing that to this podcast. Believe me,
Speaker 1: nobody's doing that if anything. If anything, they're jumping out
Speaker 1: windows because we scream at each other. Yeah, speaking of
Speaker 1: this podcast, I want to peel back the curtain for
Speaker 1: a second. We are this is episode one two. Here
Speaker 1: comes a Blooming Onion. Alright, episodes one thirty and one
Speaker 1: thirty one, the last two episodes we've done, are down
Speaker 1: dramatically in listenership. Yeah, now, scary things. It's because of
Speaker 1: the craziness that's going on in the world with the
Speaker 1: with the protests and the and COVID, and there's a
Speaker 1: disrupt there's a clear disruption in listening to any content.
Speaker 1: And I told Brodie, you know what, I'm gonna read
Speaker 1: them the text because I have nothing to hide. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna go back to the night that I texted you,
Speaker 1: that the night that you were in a panic that
Speaker 1: these two episodes weren't getting a lot of play. What
Speaker 1: did I write? I said, Hey, Brodie, where is it?
Speaker 1: God Man? We talk a lot on text. Yeah, um
Speaker 1: right here, I'm like, uh, you searched by keyword no
Speaker 1: on my app I can search. Okay, well you got
Speaker 1: the superior phone I do. Yeah, Android. What I said
Speaker 1: that that clicking was your wife? That was That was
Speaker 1: a click of disgust in my fucking throat because they
Speaker 1: can't find the text. Okay, here's the thing. I can
Speaker 1: pull up the text messages. But basically what you said
Speaker 1: was people are out of their routines. They're fascinated by
Speaker 1: the protesting going on and not listening to podcasts. But
Speaker 1: I countered that by saying a hundred podcasts are doing
Speaker 1: better than us on the Heart radio Top one hundred.
Speaker 1: So people are listening to some other podcasts. They just
Speaker 1: have slowed down on The Brooklyn Boys only these two episodes.
Speaker 1: So obviously you can't tell us slices why that is
Speaker 1: because if you're hearing this, you've already heard those episodes.
Speaker 1: So I need to know from people who haven't heard them.
Speaker 1: But if they haven't heard them, they're not hearing this
Speaker 1: to tell me why I'm gonna put I'm gonna put
Speaker 1: this into perspective, and I actually put this into my
Speaker 1: own words. Forget about the text. I pretty much told
Speaker 1: you we are not that important. People people love us,
Speaker 1: that's great. But when there's other things going on, like
Speaker 1: I don't know, awesome weather. Maybe some people are finally
Speaker 1: going discovering the outdoors. Other people are home and still
Speaker 1: busy under lockdown. Other people are are protesting, they're walking
Speaker 1: with marchers, or they're doing okay, all that stuff adds
Speaker 1: up to what, At what point does the Brooklyn Boys
Speaker 1: podcast listening come into play in the order of things
Speaker 1: that you have to get done in your day? And
Speaker 1: I think that we are relatively at the bottom. I know,
Speaker 1: I'm not an egotistical guy. I know there's a zillion
Speaker 1: things we are probably the last thing we're background noise
Speaker 1: for some people. So that's why I'm saying, don't worry
Speaker 1: so much about the fact that the numbers are off
Speaker 1: a little bit. Okay, I know that. Um, everything you
Speaker 1: said is accurate except a couple of things. I think
Speaker 1: the decline started the same episode that you told people
Speaker 1: to listen to, of the episode where the girls talk
Speaker 1: about sex all the time, of that other podcast, Yeah,
Speaker 1: which for some reason we're not mentioning, right, because I
Speaker 1: think the dip we've taken is people listening to air
Speaker 1: porn and they're like, oh, you know what, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: watch the protests on television or I'm gonna go protest.
Speaker 1: I've only got time for one podcast. I'm gonna listen
Speaker 1: to the girls talking about porn rather than than a
Speaker 1: crabby sixty year old guy complain about going to Walmart
Speaker 1: and not getting his drunks. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Uh. Don't
Speaker 1: exaggerate my age the way I exaggerate the price of
Speaker 1: your sound equipment. Why not, It's fair game. It's all
Speaker 1: on the table. You're telling people. I'm dude, I'm not
Speaker 1: even close. What are you talking about? Well, then guess
Speaker 1: what the price of my equipment wasn't even close. Okay, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's that's the same. That's apples and apples right there. Anyway, Um,
Speaker 1: people who like to complaining, I want to go right to.
Speaker 1: I want to go right to the music that the songs,
Speaker 1: the songs that we for some reason, all right, we okay,
Speaker 1: we've been holding on to this for three weeks now,
Speaker 1: where where Brody and I feel that there's music out
Speaker 1: there that we hear on the radio and all over
Speaker 1: wherever every day, and this these songs don't make any sense.
Speaker 1: Let's explain. So now that we're doing the shows from home. Normally,
Speaker 1: when we're in the studio, right when we go to commercial,
Speaker 1: we take our headphones off, we go walk around, we
Speaker 1: talk to each other. We are not listening to the commercials.
Speaker 1: We are not listening to the songs being played. We're
Speaker 1: not right because we've heard a moundred times. So we
Speaker 1: and plus we have to plan for the next break.
Speaker 1: But when you're sitting on the couch in your house,
Speaker 1: right you have I have to monitor the show so
Speaker 1: I know when we're coming back on the air. So
Speaker 1: I'm actually being forced to listen to the songs. Now,
Speaker 1: they're catchy they're great songs. Not I don't have a
Speaker 1: problem with them being addictive. By the way, addictive and
Speaker 1: addicting do not um So one is a verb and
Speaker 1: one is an adjective, So go look that up anyway.
Speaker 1: People use it wrong all the time. So I have
Speaker 1: those a these songs, and I noticed the pattern, and
Speaker 1: I wrote down three songs that were driving me crazy.
Speaker 1: I called scary, and I said, have you noticed with
Speaker 1: these three songs? He said, oh my god, I've got
Speaker 1: a song it's guilty of the same thing. So I
Speaker 1: gave him three songs where the chorus or the catchy
Speaker 1: part of the song is four lines repeated that rhyme.
Speaker 1: But I guarantee unless you looked them up and don't
Speaker 1: tweet me. For the most part, the average person has
Speaker 1: no idea what they're saying, but their catchy and their hits,
Speaker 1: and usually the catchy part makes it a hit. That
Speaker 1: we called that the hook, because these songs all became
Speaker 1: popular because that's the one that's the that's the anthem
Speaker 1: part of the song that you would chant that lad.
Speaker 1: Usually with a catchy song, you only know the chorus
Speaker 1: right right, You kind of hum the rest, remember like
Speaker 1: you might even say, hey, remember that song from fifteen
Speaker 1: years ago? It went like that I did, and you
Speaker 1: you would say, like the words, those words are usually macarena, right,
Speaker 1: those those are that is the hook of the song,
Speaker 1: that's the most catchy part. Well, how are you ever
Speaker 1: going to reference these songs in five ten years? Hey?
Speaker 1: Remember that song that was said? Oh wait what did
Speaker 1: they say? Because these are the catchy parts. Okay, So
Speaker 1: in no particular order, the four songs will play my
Speaker 1: three and then yours because I want you to know,
Speaker 1: actually know that the third one actually we both we
Speaker 1: both called out, but I'm gonna okay, so here's here's
Speaker 1: here's this first one. This is called Heartless by the Weekend.
Speaker 1: You've heard this before. Ane trying to find the lawn
Speaker 1: that can fix me, judging in the six feet and
Speaker 1: I must be sickly. Yeah, okay, you can maybe bring
Speaker 1: that's version. I heard the word pussy, so yeah you
Speaker 1: have about that. That's your porn right there. Yeah, maybe
Speaker 1: you can break down the first line, maybe the second,
Speaker 1: But basically what he's doing is what she does in
Speaker 1: all the songs. He's like, man, a minute, never meant
Speaker 1: a chicken and a chicken pee right then, I'm going
Speaker 1: to pee on the big tree on a bitch knee,
Speaker 1: trying to find the lawn that can fix me. Be
Speaker 1: dodging death in the six speed, I've been dodging something
Speaker 1: in the in the six speeds. I guess the car.
Speaker 1: I've been dodging death in the six P six speed
Speaker 1: because he's got a car that is six You know,
Speaker 1: a lot of cars have five speeds, but his is.
Speaker 1: You know, his is much more expensive than U s.
Speaker 1: I don't you don't have to tweet his lyrics to that.
Speaker 1: We can google the lyrics. Our point is, for the
Speaker 1: most part, he's kind of just slurring, mumbling and making
Speaker 1: up words that rhyme. It's not there's nothing going on
Speaker 1: there now here here comes in a doja cat, this
Speaker 1: is safe. You all know this song. Listen to this?
Speaker 1: Huh didn't he been no notice? You Punchington? You flow
Speaker 1: it again, Michelle Obamas floatice? Is that it the only
Speaker 1: at those four lines I can only I can only
Speaker 1: pick out, why don't you say so? The fourth line
Speaker 1: I can't even din't even didn't even notice? And then
Speaker 1: it even mumbles itself. Listen to the second line comes
Speaker 1: should I bet you had a moment. I don't know,
Speaker 1: I don't know. Yeah, you're lying if you said you
Speaker 1: heard it once into the words this one here, this
Speaker 1: one here you called out, and I'm like, oh, yes,
Speaker 1: this is I got very upset with this one. This
Speaker 1: is the Black Eyed Peas and Jay bald hold on.
Speaker 1: I don't speak Spanish enough to know what he's saying.
Speaker 1: I don't even know if it's actual like sentences. They
Speaker 1: just they're just saying words and ending it with all right.
Speaker 1: So so Black Eyed Peas teamed up with Jay Balvin,
Speaker 1: Spanish singer, and uh they took They stole the hook
Speaker 1: of the Rhythm of the Night by Corona from by
Speaker 1: the way, Corona back in the news again. How great
Speaker 1: is that that? You know it's by an artist called Corona,
Speaker 1: But anyway, the song is called Rittmo. And you know
Speaker 1: this one just started going some damn baby, a nice life.
Speaker 1: We bought each other extremo baby, So okay, it gets
Speaker 1: better towards the end. We party to the extremo. You
Speaker 1: heard that one, right, Brodie? Yeah, but he he rhymed
Speaker 1: uh a N memo and femo with Venmo and I think, right, like,
Speaker 1: give me, give me something about giving me venmoing me money, which,
Speaker 1: by the way, a lot of times you know they
Speaker 1: use cash app these days. It's all about the cash album,
Speaker 1: not venmoot run. Wait what hold on? Don't just started
Speaker 1: going on a semam baby a nice life. We bought
Speaker 1: you bought each other, extremo baby you got me? All
Speaker 1: these clips are really low. I think he said, no, no,
Speaker 1: they are nice and loud for the people, trust me. Okay.
Speaker 1: I think he said, I'll retcha and femo which means
Speaker 1: to the right, and then I don't look, if you
Speaker 1: speak Spanish, then this song makes sense. If you don't
Speaker 1: speak Spanish and you just listen to the radio, it's
Speaker 1: just a bunch of rhymes. Well because them all. I
Speaker 1: think the problem here is a language barrier, and maybe
Speaker 1: we need to take some babble because this is Spanish.
Speaker 1: So I think that our issue. Whoa whoa, whoa whoa?
Speaker 1: Did you just slip in? Did you slip on a client?
Speaker 1: Not my client? I don't get money off them all, right,
Speaker 1: don't you don't you? That's Danielle's client. They could sponsor
Speaker 1: the podcast, by the way, still no takers. The sponsor
Speaker 1: to the podcast What's up with that okay, so so yeah,
Speaker 1: so the Venmo right party to the extremo. Baby, I
Speaker 1: like to shave with some Cramo all right. And this song,
Speaker 1: this is one of my actually, it's actually one of
Speaker 1: my favorite songs out there right now. It's the perfect
Speaker 1: summer song. It's got the perfect summer beat, does it well?
Speaker 1: It's called It's called Roses by St John. St. John's song,
Speaker 1: the Inbok remix. It's a DJ who remixed that's that's important.
Speaker 1: It is important, No I know, and said, this is
Speaker 1: uh St John. I don't know. I don't know. No,
Speaker 1: I don't wait, I already know, already know. It's all
Speaker 1: I could make out. And then this part here, you
Speaker 1: know how I get too lit when I turn it on.
Speaker 1: I got it, see that. But but that's not what
Speaker 1: she said. I can't for the light. I know you
Speaker 1: got it. I can't listen. I can't, for the life
Speaker 1: of me pick out the first forty five seconds. But
Speaker 1: it's catchy. You gotta admit, Brodie, this is the windows
Speaker 1: down song. You know what's great? No, it's not because
Speaker 1: you can't sing it. You're in the car, you're going, Yeah,
Speaker 1: let's sing along to it. I don't. Don't the Pablos
Speaker 1: on the floor. No, I like Pablo on the floor.
Speaker 1: That makes what sex? This is gonna make me feel?
Speaker 1: You already know? Yeah, you already know. Yeah, Okay, I
Speaker 1: got I'm in the corner with the money on my face. Anyway,
Speaker 1: she knows, but but we don't know. It's a great
Speaker 1: song I love. That's one of my favorite songs right now.
Speaker 1: It's so sad and I don't know any words to
Speaker 1: it except you know, I get too lit when I
Speaker 1: turned it on, or maybe not. Anyway, google for yourself.
Speaker 1: Follow along with the lyrics. Yeah, that that that's why
Speaker 1: it's important to uh, if you know them all you're lying.
Speaker 1: That's it. I was gonna call my father. I wish
Speaker 1: I'm a happy birthday. You you're buying them a garbage pail.
Speaker 1: You you sit on the radio today, you're buying him
Speaker 1: a garbage pail. I am Should we call him? No?
Speaker 1: I want to talk about the garbage pail first. Okay,
Speaker 1: you talked on the radio to day because you couldn't
Speaker 1: keep a secret that you brought him a simple human
Speaker 1: garbage pail. I got a problem with simple human garbage pails.
Speaker 1: And then I'm gonna give you a surprise at the end. Here.
Speaker 1: Well we look long. I gotta set this whole thing
Speaker 1: up because people know what we're talking about. If they
Speaker 1: didn't listen to the big show. No, I was gonna
Speaker 1: I was gonna set it up. Go ahead, it's your story.
Speaker 1: Well here's the deal. Help me out here. Uh. You know,
Speaker 1: I didn't know if buying a trash can for your
Speaker 1: father or mother or anyone is a good birthday present.
Speaker 1: But I realized my life has been changed by this.
Speaker 1: Not a client, not a sponsible. I have this have
Speaker 1: a scam bony jingle, wridding because I got an angle. Okay,
Speaker 1: all right, I'll get so anyway. Yeah, so this this
Speaker 1: company called Simple Human and they make they make garbage pails,
Speaker 1: fancy trash cans, their voice activated so you could be
Speaker 1: like open can and the little open up, or you
Speaker 1: can go walk by it and its sentences that you're
Speaker 1: there and it will open the lid. So it's like
Speaker 1: a touchless situation. But here's the fun. They're their liners,
Speaker 1: their pil liners, which is their you know, their bags,
Speaker 1: trash bags. They fit there the curvature of their pal perfectly,
Speaker 1: so you don't get any wasted space. You don't have
Speaker 1: to stretch it out to get around the rim rim rim,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. So everything you see like
Speaker 1: is so perfect and so clean looking. It's like it's
Speaker 1: an actual, like piece of art in your kitchen. You know,
Speaker 1: some of them coming like crescent half moons. They're coming
Speaker 1: around and square or whatever. But but my point is,
Speaker 1: I never thought twice about throwing out the trash. Well,
Speaker 1: when I got my hands on one of these, I
Speaker 1: said to myself, oh my god, this is life changing.
Speaker 1: I really was. But now, hold it is life changing.
Speaker 1: Hold I understand. But is this garbage pail the scary
Speaker 1: sound system of garbage pails? You could equate it like that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: maybe that's okay. Is this garbage pail the scary ring
Speaker 1: light of garbage pails? Brody people listening to this who
Speaker 1: have simple human garbage pails and know what we're talking about,
Speaker 1: I don't even want to. I don't even know what
Speaker 1: you call them. Maybe not even garbage pail, maybe a waste,
Speaker 1: maybe a waste. This will settle it, So I understand,
Speaker 1: this will settle it. Would you ask your own pail?
Speaker 1: I can tell you right now as I'm standing here,
Speaker 1: that I love my garbage pail and I look forward
Speaker 1: to taking out the garbage. And here's why, because when
Speaker 1: you it's not a sponsor. No, you just pulled the
Speaker 1: two sides and they pull it right up. It's nice
Speaker 1: and compact. It's and that you know, it keeps its form.
Speaker 1: It goes right down the trash shoot very easily. And
Speaker 1: and the next garbage and in the next trash bag
Speaker 1: is sitting there inside the can. It's kind of like
Speaker 1: on its side. It's kind of like a thing, and
Speaker 1: you pull it up like like you're pushing pulling tissues
Speaker 1: out of a box, and it's right there so you
Speaker 1: don't have to go digging for them anywhere. It's it's
Speaker 1: just super convenient. So I thought that it would be
Speaker 1: great to actually gift this the gift of the simple
Speaker 1: human to my father, who's a simple human father love
Speaker 1: would love it. I thought, okay, there's two things I'm
Speaker 1: gonna say about the simple hue. I have a story
Speaker 1: about it, which I'm gonna reserve till the end of this.
Speaker 1: But simple human garbage pails, as you've described them, right
Speaker 1: when you go to bed Beth and beyond, when you
Speaker 1: could bed Beth and beyond had basically two types of garbage.
Speaker 1: Yes they did. They have the well three. They have
Speaker 1: the plastic ones right like rubber Maid and uh and
Speaker 1: an umbra like cheap stuff. Then they had like flimsy
Speaker 1: metal aluminum cans that were like thirty dollars, okay, thirty
Speaker 1: five dollars, and then you would jump to the simple human,
Speaker 1: which were for a garbage can. There was no like,
Speaker 1: I want a nice one, but not that nice. You
Speaker 1: went with the plastic, you went with the tin can.
Speaker 1: When you went for the hundred dollar that was it
Speaker 1: and simple human this is the Scamboni hit the jingle scary.
Speaker 1: Why is it a scamboni? Okay, because they charged you
Speaker 1: a hundred dollars for a garbage pail, which, by the way,
Speaker 1: you're gonna use for garbage. Let's not forget that. But
Speaker 1: how many times am I going to switch it out
Speaker 1: for an upgraded on like an iPhone where I got
Speaker 1: a new model coming out next year. Once I got
Speaker 1: into my kitchen, it's there, all right, but then they
Speaker 1: suggest and give you the impression do you lower that bed?
Speaker 1: They give you the impression that you have to buy
Speaker 1: their bags. So what they do is they tell you
Speaker 1: the letter of the bag type that goes with your garbage. Right,
Speaker 1: So I my garbage pail clearly has the blue will
Speaker 1: circle that has the letter J on it. So J.
Speaker 1: So I gotta find J bags, right, Well, you know
Speaker 1: where to find D bags. You hung out with them
Speaker 1: this weekend, all right? So the J bags, they're like
Speaker 1: ten times the price of buying Glad bags or Hefty
Speaker 1: bags in a giant box or buying Kirkland bags at Costco. Right,
Speaker 1: so you have to buy these special bags because they
Speaker 1: fit perfectly in your hundred dollar garbage pail. So they
Speaker 1: get you both ways. It's a double scam. Well, guess
Speaker 1: what in my kitchen next to the oven, there is
Speaker 1: nine and a half inches between the wall and my
Speaker 1: stove since we bought the stove eighteen years ago. That's
Speaker 1: how much room there is. Okay, there is nowhere else
Speaker 1: in my kitchen to put a tall kitchen garbage pail
Speaker 1: except that spot. That's it, and the only place to
Speaker 1: put that. Only company that makes a garbage pail that
Speaker 1: fits that. Let me guess it's simple human. No, you're wrong,
Speaker 1: it's rubber made, cheap plastic that when you step on
Speaker 1: it too hard, the lever pops off, and I gotta
Speaker 1: turn it upside down and pop it back in. And
Speaker 1: that's the garbage pail we my wife and I and
Speaker 1: my family have been using for twenty years. Sounds like
Speaker 1: you should throw the garbage pail in the garbage pail
Speaker 1: because that's trash. Okay, so hold on. So for years
Speaker 1: my wife has been saying, we got to find a
Speaker 1: better place to put a garbage pail. There's nowhere else
Speaker 1: to do it. If I go to the other side
Speaker 1: of the wall, that's the dining room, and who he
Speaker 1: wants a garbage pail in your dining room? There is
Speaker 1: nowhere to put a garbage pail in the way the
Speaker 1: kitchen is laid out. Your calenge, you stick it in
Speaker 1: the middle of the room. Just stick it there. That's it.
Speaker 1: So I broke down this week and I said, you
Speaker 1: know what, I'm gonna go and get a simple human
Speaker 1: garbage pail. That's it. I've been saving up. I got
Speaker 1: some coupons at bed Bath and Beyond, and I'm gonna
Speaker 1: buy it. Well, guess what the coupons coupons you know
Speaker 1: and love at bed Bath, Oh, they don't work at
Speaker 1: Simple Simple Human products coupon does not apply. So f
Speaker 1: you again, simple human. You can't even use the coupons
Speaker 1: because they're so elitist. You have to pay full price. Okay,
Speaker 1: I go, And I said, you know what, I don't care.
Speaker 1: I've been promising my wife. I'm gonna put it on
Speaker 1: the other side of the wall in the dining room.
Speaker 1: She'll hate where it is and we'll go back to
Speaker 1: the plastic piece of ship. So I bought the I
Speaker 1: bought it right. It's it's the chrome silver one. It's
Speaker 1: a hundred dollars. I felt awful. I'm sick to my
Speaker 1: stomach even saying it. But I was like, okay, fine,
Speaker 1: So it comes with it comes with bags, right, it
Speaker 1: comes with whatever, letting fucking scam bags it comes with.
Speaker 1: And I said, fuck it. I put a hefty bag
Speaker 1: in and guess what's scary. It's still perfectly. It fits perfectly,
Speaker 1: So don't fall for the scam. Figure out what company?
Speaker 1: No hold on? So I get the bait right. So
Speaker 1: it's gotta, it's gotta. It's got this expensive ring that
Speaker 1: comes down and holds the bag in place, right, and
Speaker 1: then the lid goes down softly, oh so soft, So
Speaker 1: soft into the rim, right, so only this little thin
Speaker 1: flap goes up and it drops down into the ring
Speaker 1: and it's just whisper, quiet, whisper. So my wife comes
Speaker 1: home and I say, you can put the first garbage in.
Speaker 1: I surprise her and she goes over to it. And
Speaker 1: my wife has never stepped on the foot pedal on
Speaker 1: the rubber made piece of ship, because if you stepped
Speaker 1: on it too hard, it broke off. So for the
Speaker 1: past ten years she lifts the lid by hand. Well,
Speaker 1: you can't lift the lid by hand on the simple
Speaker 1: Human because it's paper, it's and it fits in the ring,
Speaker 1: and it's not alright, alright, you know how to destroy
Speaker 1: every thing, to knock everything down. I'm telling you everyone,
Speaker 1: it's a great thing. You hold on. Let me see
Speaker 1: if there's an alternative home depot, because they're open. Only
Speaker 1: had this one, the top of the line one, So
Speaker 1: I go on the website. They make one the same size.
Speaker 1: The metal isn't as shiny, and the lid is black plastic,
Speaker 1: but it's a lid that you can lift off. Well.
Speaker 1: Simple humans like three weeks to ship and Amazon charges
Speaker 1: more money, and the only place it has it is
Speaker 1: home depot, but you can do a search and find
Speaker 1: the store that has it, because my store didn't have it.
Speaker 1: So I find the one near your house. Scary. I
Speaker 1: go to the home depot near your house. It says
Speaker 1: they've got three in stock. So I go there. They
Speaker 1: have none in stock. None they at me. So three
Speaker 1: cans at you because they obviously are unaccounted for and
Speaker 1: they're missing right right, or they're using them in the
Speaker 1: break room, or somebody scanned the wrong item and then
Speaker 1: switched them or whatever. So I had ordered from Amazon,
Speaker 1: I have to wait a week now, So I've got
Speaker 1: the Whisper Quiet super expensive one. Now, how to take
Speaker 1: the garbage out so it's still clean? So if I
Speaker 1: have to return it, it's it only got used for
Speaker 1: like a minute. So my point is, first of all,
Speaker 1: they're too expensive, and if you buy the wrong one,
Speaker 1: you fucked, and right, buy the bags. That's all that
Speaker 1: I get. You know, you could find the bags on Amazon.
Speaker 1: You could buy the imitation the imitation ones out there.
Speaker 1: You don't have to buy their brand. That's fine, that's cool,
Speaker 1: all right, whatever, go to Target. All that said, All
Speaker 1: that said, you know your father, you know what he's
Speaker 1: gonna say, I'm gonna call him right to him. I
Speaker 1: think I'm a simple man. Why would you exactly has
Speaker 1: the word simple in it? What did he say to
Speaker 1: you when you when you bought a two and fifty
Speaker 1: dollar turkey? He ate it? He gobbled away, Yes he did.
Speaker 1: He said he loved it. You don't need, We don't need.
Speaker 1: Williams say, that's the thing my father's Sicilian and not
Speaker 1: Ladan we have. He's got a clash in his own blood.
Speaker 1: And here's the problem with that is we're thick headed.
Speaker 1: He's thick headed. But then once you introduce him to
Speaker 1: something new and you take him out his root, out
Speaker 1: of his routine, then he's excited about it. Then he's like, Okay, alright,
Speaker 1: guess what. It's now ten years later and I'm still
Speaker 1: buying that same freaking turkey after he told me not
Speaker 1: to and at the first year, the first year. So
Speaker 1: now he loves it. He looks forward to it. Right
Speaker 1: around November one, he's a good yea, you're gonna you
Speaker 1: gotta You're gonna come over for Thanksgiving. And I'll be like,
Speaker 1: of course, Dad is so okay, um, damn you can
Speaker 1: You're gonna you're gonna get the toyky you go, We're
Speaker 1: gonna get Dad. Don't worry about it. You don't have
Speaker 1: to ask. You know, I'm buying the turkey. See he
Speaker 1: kind of he sniffs around for it because he loves it. Now,
Speaker 1: that's what I'm saying. It's it's Tony. How long you
Speaker 1: after you give him this garbage pail to? How much?
Speaker 1: I'm gonna call him up right now? Hold on, he
Speaker 1: you're gonna tell you to Tom how much you're gonna
Speaker 1: tell him what youre buying him? Yes, his birthday is tomorrow.
Speaker 1: It's on the way and and you're gonna tell him
Speaker 1: that he's responsible buying his own garbage bags special, Yes, yes,
Speaker 1: hold on. Hello, Hey ma, I'm went to Brooklyn Boys
Speaker 1: podcast with Brody. How are you doing? Oh good? How
Speaker 1: are you now? We've been good? Yeah, we're great. Him scared?
Speaker 1: How are you doing? How are you doing? Brody? I'm
Speaker 1: doing well? Thank you good? So may that you know
Speaker 1: what's coming daddy? There? Dy? Yes, he is put him
Speaker 1: on the phone. Well, what mom is Scary? Scary has
Speaker 1: a gift. Scary has an idea for a very expensive gift.
Speaker 1: You know your son? He can't. He can't go moderate
Speaker 1: with anything. He has an idea for a gift for
Speaker 1: your husband that he thinks it's going to be stellar.
Speaker 1: And I think, knowing knowing Tony, he doesn't like this
Speaker 1: certain thing shouldn't be extravagant. They should be said, right,
Speaker 1: absolutely right. So you know how Scary goes overboard on
Speaker 1: things that he shouldn't go overboard on. So way do
Speaker 1: you hear this, this ridiculous ideas? Yeah, it's scary. Tell
Speaker 1: him what your ideas? All right? Wait, he's going to
Speaker 1: pick up the phone. Hold no, no, no, no, no no,
Speaker 1: put him on the phone together. No, I won't want
Speaker 1: your mom with give an opinion first. Oh, I'll say
Speaker 1: it out loud quickly. Okay, So there's a there's am
Speaker 1: I bought him a simple human garbage pail and it's
Speaker 1: on the way to the house for his birthday. Don't
Speaker 1: anything like this sounds like the phone tap with the bicycles,
Speaker 1: you know. Remember what do you think he's gonna love
Speaker 1: it or not? Do you think he's gonna like it
Speaker 1: or not? Mama Ski, how much do you think a
Speaker 1: garbage pail should cost? Well? That's well, I you know why,
Speaker 1: First of all it's got. First of all, I know
Speaker 1: about simple human garbage pail. Hey, stopped say it out loud.
Speaker 1: What do you do? I tell he wants to tell
Speaker 1: my No, he's outside, he's outside. He didn't hear. Yes. Um,
Speaker 1: so I know about them because we've looked at them
Speaker 1: in um, in bath and beyond. Hold on, hold on,
Speaker 1: And why didn't you get one? Well, because sometimes it's
Speaker 1: not you know, like I can only put it in
Speaker 1: a certain spot, okay, and um it has to fit.
Speaker 1: And I know the thing, and I knew and I
Speaker 1: know that you have to have certain garbage pails, the
Speaker 1: the what you call the big exactly right. And I
Speaker 1: didn't want to have to be doing that all the time.
Speaker 1: I wanted to just get a big box from Costco.
Speaker 1: And what don't you want about Kirkland, Kirkland? Thank you? Okay,
Speaker 1: you got that right. That's fine, that's fine, that's great.
Speaker 1: So you can't give somebody gift that's gonna cost them, No,
Speaker 1: it's not, because I already I already two cases of
Speaker 1: liners coming to the house. Oh my god, you mean
Speaker 1: we have to keep this garbage pill You're just going
Speaker 1: to replace the one that you have that that disgusting
Speaker 1: one that you have sitting over the mine is fine,
Speaker 1: It's not fine. Wait wait till you wait till you
Speaker 1: see this, Wait till you see how it works. But
Speaker 1: I have to ask you. I have to ask you
Speaker 1: a very important question. Okay, now you've got this garbage pail?
Speaker 1: Is it going to pick up the garbage every night
Speaker 1: and bring it outside? I mean, if it's that expensive
Speaker 1: and it's that great, I would think that it should
Speaker 1: take itself outside and put it in the garbage pail. Exactly.
Speaker 1: Put Daddy on the phone. Why it's time? Why he
Speaker 1: spent two two hundred dollars on the garbage pail? I
Speaker 1: can't He did not? He did not? You know him? Oh?
Speaker 1: Do I know him too? Well? Do you know? Do
Speaker 1: you know he brought home studio equipment for for a
Speaker 1: hundred nine thousand dollars for the for the gaggerating. This
Speaker 1: guy's exaggerating. Don't listen to him. Come on, hold on,
Speaker 1: Time is money here? All right? You're you're ready for that? Yes,
Speaker 1: time is money? Yeah? Yeah, come on, yeah, all right,
Speaker 1: how was going to stick? And let me get hold on,
Speaker 1: let's get Tony on the phone. Your mom agree with me?
Speaker 1: Kirkland garbage back in the meantime alright with Scary and Rody. Okay, serious, Hey,
Speaker 1: hey guys, how how are you doing? Hey? Happy birthday,
Speaker 1: thank you, Happy birthday, Happy backday, thank you. Listen, Um,
Speaker 1: we've got a problem. We don't have a problem. We
Speaker 1: don't have a problem. I'm telling you. I'm gonna tell
Speaker 1: you this live on this podcast right now. But keep
Speaker 1: in mind your wife agreed with me already. What are
Speaker 1: you trying to pit her against me? She's already. Dad,
Speaker 1: I don't your birthday to morrow, and I know I
Speaker 1: really didn't get you anything. So well, here's what I did, Okay,
Speaker 1: I did. I'm sending you a gift, okay, because I
Speaker 1: know that this is gonna come in handy, because I
Speaker 1: know that for all these years I've wanted well, I
Speaker 1: didn't really care and I didn't want one of these,
Speaker 1: and then I got one and it changed my life.
Speaker 1: So now I'm gonna change your life. As tomorrow or Sunday,
Speaker 1: whenever it comes to the house, you are going to
Speaker 1: get in the mail a simple human kitchen, stainless steel
Speaker 1: garbage pail with two cases of liners. Wow, I want
Speaker 1: to know. Can I go to bed with this thing,
Speaker 1: and maybe I could have some fun with it or something.
Speaker 1: I mean, if it's so, if it's so exciting and
Speaker 1: something I'm looking forward to all my life, I could
Speaker 1: use a little sexual activity with it and stuff like that.
Speaker 1: This is scary. It costs more than the turkey he
Speaker 1: buys every year. Shut up, broady, stop it so listen.
Speaker 1: I had to tell you no, listen, I'm being honest.
Speaker 1: It's on its way to the house. I wanted it yesterday.
Speaker 1: It's coming. So here's what. It's going right to the house.
Speaker 1: So what what it is is, it's a stainless steel.
Speaker 1: It's gonna look like a piece of art in the kitchen.
Speaker 1: It's gonna look like it belongs a furniture. That's how
Speaker 1: beautiful these cans are. And but wait, there's more there is.
Speaker 1: I want to know if that's so beautiful. I've sent
Speaker 1: him Valentine's Day cards every year because or something like that.
Speaker 1: Let me say this, every time you walk by it,
Speaker 1: it knows you want to put garbage in there, so
Speaker 1: it the lid opens automatically. It has a sense on it.
Speaker 1: You got the censor one, Oh my god, and it
Speaker 1: sounds like the one that was that Stephen has because
Speaker 1: when here whatever I passed flight, it would open up.
Speaker 1: And I'm saying, has nothing. It's throwing here. Why is
Speaker 1: it opening up because you walk by too closely? It's
Speaker 1: so I learned that it learns your your moves and
Speaker 1: it knows. So if you're in the kitchen a lot,
Speaker 1: it's not gonna move. No, it knows. No, I'm telling you, Anthony, listen.
Speaker 1: I I appreciate any anything you do from you know that.
Speaker 1: But the freaking garbage pail in the kitchen that we
Speaker 1: we passed that is just about eating with me every
Speaker 1: day because that's how big the kitchen is. I mean,
Speaker 1: you know it's going to think I want to throw
Speaker 1: stuff in it all the time and keep popping open. No,
Speaker 1: it's not what I'm trying to think. That. It learns
Speaker 1: your It learns your mannerisms and your gestures. If you
Speaker 1: come close to if you get close to it in
Speaker 1: a certain way, it will open up, and it will
Speaker 1: it will wait for garbage. I'm telling you, if you
Speaker 1: have to and rub it, it'll open. I'm telling you now,
Speaker 1: I almost got you. The one that has a voice
Speaker 1: sensor where you scream open, can open, can and it
Speaker 1: will open up the really open can and it flips.
Speaker 1: You've been alone too long. I think, I think you
Speaker 1: really have to stop thinking from my birthday this year,
Speaker 1: I'm getting it in the can. Oh no, God, hey,
Speaker 1: what you tried to do when you were a kid. Okay,
Speaker 1: so here's the thing, so back to the can. Uh.
Speaker 1: What I want to do is listen. I bought you
Speaker 1: two cases of liners. You and by the way, the
Speaker 1: these liners are, they're fitting. And when you when you
Speaker 1: take the garbage out, okay, when you pull the two
Speaker 1: handles and you take the garbage out, you can see, no,
Speaker 1: you can see you can see inside the can. The
Speaker 1: next uh, the next liner sitting there like a tissue
Speaker 1: box and all you gotta do is pull it out
Speaker 1: and then you put it on and it fits perfectly.
Speaker 1: I'm telling you you're gonna love this. How expensive bodies
Speaker 1: line is because you know me, I'm an easy guy.
Speaker 1: I'm I'm I'm very basic, easy going guy. Man, I
Speaker 1: go I go to Well, Well, here's the thing. I
Speaker 1: will tell you this. The first one and twenty are
Speaker 1: on me because I got you two cases. Well how
Speaker 1: much well I got I got two D forty for
Speaker 1: sixty six dollars. How much garbage you can get that
Speaker 1: many a cost? Go for fifteen bucks? How much? Can
Speaker 1: I ask you a question? How often do you throw
Speaker 1: out the garbage? Every Oh? You've got it? Well? You know, Anthony,
Speaker 1: if you, if you, if you throw it out at
Speaker 1: least once, maybe twice, I don't know, every every other day.
Speaker 1: This is gonna ask you. This is gonna last you
Speaker 1: a year, a year's worth of liners. It was like
Speaker 1: story about it. I don't know what can I tell you?
Speaker 1: Done already? Right? Listen a new garden the hill? Don't you?
Speaker 1: Can't you using new garbage pail? Oh no, no, that
Speaker 1: is not the first thing on my list. What did
Speaker 1: you you listen to? I wish you would have conferred
Speaker 1: with mommy praise at least talked the mommy first, and
Speaker 1: she would have told you, Anthony, you know, not really
Speaker 1: you know what I mean? If he asked me, I
Speaker 1: would have said the same thing, sir, I mean, I
Speaker 1: hope I'm not hurting your feelings, but I'm sorry. You know,
Speaker 1: freak garbage till that open line is caught. But the
Speaker 1: price of the line, I could go out and buy
Speaker 1: three garbage pails alright, that's okay, because for Father's Day
Speaker 1: he got your talking toilet paper dispenser. You got me.
Speaker 1: It's a it's a it's a stand that holds toilet
Speaker 1: paper and it talks to you, and it doesn't I
Speaker 1: want to know if I want to know, to wich
Speaker 1: my ass, tolush the toilets for me, wipes it wipes
Speaker 1: your ass. And then he altso brought you the bags
Speaker 1: so you can put the toilet paper in the bag
Speaker 1: so you don't have to flush the toilet anymore. Oh
Speaker 1: my god. Well it's called simple human Listen. Try Anthony, listen.
Speaker 1: Is this too? Wait to send it back to where
Speaker 1: it came. It's showing up tomorrow or Sunday whatever. I'm
Speaker 1: telling you, you're gonna love it. You know you have one.
Speaker 1: I do have one. That's what get inspired me to
Speaker 1: buy it. I'm like, you, Anthony, you have one? Could
Speaker 1: I cannot use too? Hey? Hey, scary scary? Does does
Speaker 1: Robin have one? No? But Robin was the one who
Speaker 1: inspired me to buy it? Because she just got one,
Speaker 1: So I'm like, that's why I'm getting Yeah, she has
Speaker 1: one already, Otherwise I would give it to her. Sorry,
Speaker 1: you're stuck with this one. You're gonna have to throw
Speaker 1: out your own garbage. You get, throw that garbage pail
Speaker 1: in this garbage pail and then call it away. All right,
Speaker 1: all right, I got good. I tell you the thought
Speaker 1: was behind it. It was good, but you know, the
Speaker 1: thought was definitely behind it instead of in front of you.
Speaker 1: All right today, all right, by anything, I nailed it.
Speaker 1: I told you he is a simple human. I said
Speaker 1: he was a simple human. But but meaning like he'll
Speaker 1: he's okay, he doesn't. He wouldn't be offended by me
Speaker 1: buying him a garbage pail as opposed to something else.
Speaker 1: That's why he's a simple to it. It's his birthday.
Speaker 1: He lived another year, and to celebrate him staying alive
Speaker 1: one more year in the world, it is today, dodging
Speaker 1: the coronavirus. You got him garbage pail and a garbage
Speaker 1: pail and bags. Nothing says I love you like you
Speaker 1: should throw out your human waste into this pail. Well,
Speaker 1: you know that stuff you ate for dinner. Throw out
Speaker 1: the remains in the gift I gave you. What were
Speaker 1: you thinking? You just make me feel like shit. No,
Speaker 1: I think it's a great garbage pail. If you're a
Speaker 1: boogie single guy. I'm not a bougie. It's not a
Speaker 1: bougie garbage pail you call yourself. You can't even say
Speaker 1: that a boogie single guy? How much? How much does
Speaker 1: the sense of hunting forty? All right, let's just just
Speaker 1: change the topic because I can't. You're about to ask
Speaker 1: him if that I asked him, if they knew that
Speaker 1: I set my own it, or try to if you
Speaker 1: know what we're talking about. You're not listening to the
Speaker 1: episodes in order. Excuse me, my god, you have corona. No, no,
Speaker 1: you're dick. Hey. So I got a couple of things
Speaker 1: I want to get off my chest if you don't mind.
Speaker 1: First of all, I want to send a couple of
Speaker 1: thank you's. Last episode, I told you I couldn't find
Speaker 1: Tostitos Baked scoops anywhere, Okay, right, I told you they
Speaker 1: were discontinued because of the COVID nineteen pandemic. So thank
Speaker 1: you to James Hark Jr. One of our loyal listeners.
Speaker 1: James Love James. He was in a Dwayne Reid I think,
Speaker 1: or uh, Walgreens maybe, he said, and he found them
Speaker 1: stashed behind other chips. I think he said he found
Speaker 1: seven bags of big scoops and he bought them all
Speaker 1: from me. So thank you, James. I don't need him
Speaker 1: from anybody else, and I won't need him again for
Speaker 1: about six months. So can you shower received By the way,
Speaker 1: I ran into James one day in a mall. I
Speaker 1: hope he's okay. Yeah, I think yeah, I went into
Speaker 1: I ran him into a mall and he was like, hey,
Speaker 1: what's up. Scary I was. I was running out and
Speaker 1: he was running in it. Any thank you. Thank you
Speaker 1: to Haley MG. She sent me a picture. She was
Speaker 1: she saw this and she was thinking of me. Uh.
Speaker 1: It's a it's a shelf full of cases of soda,
Speaker 1: and one of them is a case a twelve pack
Speaker 1: of diet grape soda. She said, I was thinking of you.
Speaker 1: So in the picture there's also a green box of
Speaker 1: soda and a red box of soda. And the red
Speaker 1: box of soda looks like a Dr. Pepper box, but
Speaker 1: it's called Dr Bob. And the green box of soda
Speaker 1: looks a lot like mountain dew. It's called it's called
Speaker 1: Mountain shouting. Oh wow, knockoff right rotten right, But The
Speaker 1: point of her picture was that she found diet grapes
Speaker 1: so to she said, it's not grape a goo, but
Speaker 1: I found it. It's at a giant food stores, which
Speaker 1: we don't have an area, and she offered to ship
Speaker 1: them to me, and I told her that wasn't necessary.
Speaker 1: Thank you. I appreciated that, but I wan't going to
Speaker 1: say thank you to Haley, who is willing as a
Speaker 1: slice for life. She said, to ship me the twelve
Speaker 1: pack of diet grape soda, and I said, or the
Speaker 1: mountain shouting you're you're not gonna or the doctor Bob,
Speaker 1: Dr Bob Well, Dr Bob good boys, the staff. Thank
Speaker 1: you both for free ship for us, for us, thank
Speaker 1: you for the free ship for us. You can always
Speaker 1: send us free ship, but not right now. We're on
Speaker 1: pause because a lot of people are working from home
Speaker 1: and we have a part time mail department, so we
Speaker 1: don't want to bog them down right now. So we'll
Speaker 1: continue the free ship in September when we get back
Speaker 1: into the office where my scoop survives. Scary, you're gonna
Speaker 1: need to bring those home for me. Yeah, I already have.
Speaker 1: I already have the morning show Scrubs sitting here to
Speaker 1: to pair for you, and I appreciate waiting. So I'm
Speaker 1: just gonna add that scoops and then the scoops. So um.
Speaker 1: In the meantime, we got a couple of emails we
Speaker 1: could deal with and then I know you you have
Speaker 1: something that you you really have to put I know
Speaker 1: you do, but I have I have some tweets, So
Speaker 1: you read the emails. I got some tweets. We'll get
Speaker 1: that out of the way. Yeah, because we do have
Speaker 1: some some fun mail mail talk that sounds like it's
Speaker 1: mail time. Welcome, you've got mail. You can always email
Speaker 1: us at the Brooklyn Boys Podcast at gmail dot com
Speaker 1: and get into us on our socials at Scary Jones,
Speaker 1: at David Brody Instagram, Twitter, Snapchat all of it. Doesn't
Speaker 1: have a Snapchat though, anyway, But we like to read
Speaker 1: the mail from the email address. This is from Carrie
Speaker 1: Carrie Jerdy Road. Hey guys, they've been catching up on
Speaker 1: all the episodes and just as baffled as y'all are
Speaker 1: by who is considering themselves essential workers and first responders
Speaker 1: during these times during quarantine. I started in a new
Speaker 1: marketing position for a memory care facility. There's an awesome
Speaker 1: sign outside that says heroes work here. Yes, heroes certainly
Speaker 1: do work here, but I do not consider myself one
Speaker 1: of them. I do marketing. I sit at a desk
Speaker 1: and strategies. I am not the one taking care of
Speaker 1: our awesome residents. I thank our nursing staff every day
Speaker 1: for being heroes. Thank you so much for providing my
Speaker 1: drive home with entertainment. And last there's hashtag slash for
Speaker 1: life and Carrie. Sorry, I have to grammar policia. You
Speaker 1: spelled heroes h e r O S, not h g
Speaker 1: r O e S. That's the correct way, all right
Speaker 1: here here us right and Nick Handelman, But but but
Speaker 1: superhero superheroes, you know, supposed superheroes. Um? Oh, yes, right, yeah.
Speaker 1: When I was at six Flags Great Adventure, they had
Speaker 1: a giant booth set up to buy capes and it said, uh,
Speaker 1: superhero capes, and they left out the E as well. Now, Brodie,
Speaker 1: who sent you the scoops? Who's gonna send you the scoops?
Speaker 1: James Hark Jr. And you just said that you don't
Speaker 1: have any more, that you're done with the scoops? I said,
Speaker 1: baked scoops and coming I'll eat them. Well, guess what.
Speaker 1: There's more on the way from Nick Edelman, Baked Tostito scoops. Hey, Brodie,
Speaker 1: if you still need those big tostedo scoops, we have
Speaker 1: them here in Georgia and I will send you some bags.
Speaker 1: How many do you want? So he's there, he's ready
Speaker 1: to take your order. That's Nick Edelman checking out. Nick.
Speaker 1: I'll let you know see if James comes through or not.
Speaker 1: Here's a story of hope from Steve Hillsdorf. It's a
Speaker 1: free car wash. How about this. I hope you guys
Speaker 1: are doing well. Got a quick free dessert. Story doesn't
Speaker 1: involve a large sum of money, but it is a
Speaker 1: great example of business doing the right thing. Wanted to
Speaker 1: highlight these guys. Went to the one of those automated
Speaker 1: car washes last night and noticed a ton of soap
Speaker 1: on the windshield, roof and trunk of my car after
Speaker 1: the wash was supposedly finished. Well, it looked like the
Speaker 1: sprayer arm that's supposed to rinch off the soap they'd
Speaker 1: not remove, did not move across the entire with the car,
Speaker 1: leaving a ton of soap in the middle section. I
Speaker 1: paid twelve dollars for this car wash, which I don't
Speaker 1: feel as a large sum of money. However, the fact
Speaker 1: that I paid twelve dollars and still had to go
Speaker 1: home to rinse off the car myself piste me off.
Speaker 1: I wrote a comment on the company website when I
Speaker 1: got home and woke up this morning to coupon codes
Speaker 1: for two free four car washes hashtag free dessert, Stay safe,
Speaker 1: stay healthy. I don't think you're staying healthy, Brodie. You're
Speaker 1: coughing and wheezing in the background as I'm reading this email.
Speaker 1: I'm a little flemmy. Yeah, okay, but I moved the mic.
Speaker 1: I didn't cough into the mic. And this one here
Speaker 1: from Tiffany Harvey. I love hearing this. The subject is
Speaker 1: silent Slice for Life. Hey guys, Um Brodie, scary scary Brodie.
Speaker 1: I said both, so neither one of y'all can get
Speaker 1: mad at me. But if you use the example scary
Speaker 1: and Brodie, Brodie and scary in that order, you're technically
Speaker 1: saying it first his way. I hear say Brody and scary,
Speaker 1: scary and Brodie. Either way, I hope to I hope
Speaker 1: to hear a shout out on the next show. Um,
Speaker 1: I was a fan of your old podcast, Scary the
Speaker 1: off Air Show. I was an off air head, and
Speaker 1: now I've been converted into a slice for life. I've
Speaker 1: wanted to email you guys both forever, since I've been
Speaker 1: so far behind. I felt it was pointless. I should
Speaker 1: have kept notes on everything y'all mentioned that I wanted
Speaker 1: to comment on, but I didn't. Maybe I'll go back
Speaker 1: and listen again and email y'all. Maybe not, But anyways,
Speaker 1: I stopped listening back in September when I want on
Speaker 1: maternity leave, and I was, uh, soday, you go, Brodie,
Speaker 1: there's a reason why the listener ship drop. Everyone got exactly.
Speaker 1: That was in May two thousand nineteen. I went back
Speaker 1: to work may have this year, and as of today,
Speaker 1: I am all the way caught up. I love you
Speaker 1: back and forth banter. I love to hit the jingle.
Speaker 1: I love how Scary throws in his companies at just
Speaker 1: the right times, you know, companies like Sloman's. I'm not
Speaker 1: from Brooklyn, you ever, No, no, no, no, what are
Speaker 1: you talking about. I'm not going to give an example
Speaker 1: of something in an email so that I won't know
Speaker 1: that context that you son of a bitch hit the
Speaker 1: jingle hit it. I was just giving context for people
Speaker 1: that don't know what that meant. So I had to
Speaker 1: mention the client in the email. It was it's like
Speaker 1: you did not have to mention this specific client. Move on,
Speaker 1: go on, move on, snake, go on anyway. Okay, So, uh,
Speaker 1: I'm not from Brooklyn and nor have I ever been
Speaker 1: to New York, but he was away. I think it
Speaker 1: was the y'all that gave that away. Um anyway, um,
Speaker 1: but I love that thing just means you're not from Brooklyn.
Speaker 1: I don't really enjoy you guys talking about it and
Speaker 1: all the places around it. By the way, should we
Speaker 1: tell the audience what the Brooklyn equivalent of y'all is?
Speaker 1: It's you motherfucker's Yeah, how you do? Forget about that
Speaker 1: Y'alluck's No, y'all is like y'all you motherfucker's. Hey assholes
Speaker 1: would be the equivalent of you all right, right, you
Speaker 1: a bunch of guys I think, hey assholes. So anyway,
Speaker 1: but the fact that you guys talk about all this
Speaker 1: stuff makes me want to come visit one day. I
Speaker 1: used to listen to the Big Show all the time,
Speaker 1: but ever since getting Oh my goodness, I don't listen
Speaker 1: as much. Now what, Well, you gotta get back into
Speaker 1: the Big Show anyway. Um, the episode where you guys
Speaker 1: called Walgreens was I was secretly hoping one of you
Speaker 1: would slip into the uh the fat Patrick Fitzgerald and
Speaker 1: the other dude, Gerald Fitzpatrick. Oh that's my phone tap
Speaker 1: that we do from the Big Show with Ronnie. But
Speaker 1: you could have Yeah. But anyway, anyway, I also love
Speaker 1: I have the complete set of Friends DVDs like you, scary,
Speaker 1: but I did just purchase HBO Max just so I
Speaker 1: didn't have to get up and switch DVDs out just
Speaker 1: to watch Friends. A huge fan of the podcast could
Speaker 1: go on all right anyway, And one last thing, can
Speaker 1: I make a Friends comment real quick? Yes? Oh, they
Speaker 1: just wanted to wait on f That's Tiff from Lynchburg, Virginia.
Speaker 1: What's up, Tiff? Um? So, in regards to Friends, I
Speaker 1: don't know if people know this, but if you buy
Speaker 1: the DVDs, you'll you'll see what you'll see the scenes
Speaker 1: I'm talking about. But on broadcast television that the reruns
Speaker 1: they take scenes out. In fact, there are some scenes
Speaker 1: that have not been on television since they originally aired
Speaker 1: on television. Now, why do they do that because they're
Speaker 1: gonna offend people or because it's just because because in syndication, right,
Speaker 1: they put in they put in more commercials. So, UM,
Speaker 1: my daughter, who's right now, Both both my second and
Speaker 1: third oldest daughters are obsessed with Friends always and they're
Speaker 1: just in the mood now since we had HBO Max,
Speaker 1: they're re binging. But also my youngest uh tapes every
Speaker 1: day on the DVR Friends on television, So she watches
Speaker 1: NonStop episodes all you know, constantly. But she likes now
Speaker 1: pointing out what scenes are missing. And so we were
Speaker 1: watching an episode in her room the other day and
Speaker 1: she says, right there, Dad, the Monica dances missing. And
Speaker 1: I'm like, wait a minute, it vaguely sounds familiar. And
Speaker 1: she pulled up the scene on YouTube and there's a
Speaker 1: scene in like this particular episode where where um, Rachel
Speaker 1: is by the kitchen table in in the the girls
Speaker 1: apartment and Monica is over by the couches, right, and
Speaker 1: so Monica I just walked out of the bathroom or
Speaker 1: something and um, they say, oh, they tell her something,
Speaker 1: and um, she says what And on the episode that
Speaker 1: was on television, it cuts and all of a sudden,
Speaker 1: Rachel is in the living room. Oh that's terrible, that's
Speaker 1: awful continuity. They can't they can't cut a scene like
Speaker 1: that where it doesn't flow right. So what they took
Speaker 1: out was Monica asking a question, Rachel sang something still
Speaker 1: in the kitchen, and Monica doing a dance and a
Speaker 1: song that was hilarious, and then Rachel walking over as
Speaker 1: she was singing. So they cut that out. So you
Speaker 1: wouldn't know. If you're watching Friends on reruns one levision
Speaker 1: like I didn't, you wouldn't. You might not even notice it.
Speaker 1: But if you're Friends not like my kids are, you'd
Speaker 1: notice it. So HBO Max is, to my knowledge, playing
Speaker 1: the whole episode Old School Now with no commercial. I
Speaker 1: wonder how many scenes have been deleted from syndication from
Speaker 1: the show because they had their commercials in. Yeah, so
Speaker 1: I google. By the way, we don't have that problem
Speaker 1: here on The Brook Boys. No, No, you can. You
Speaker 1: can google, like what scenes were cut out of Friends
Speaker 1: or whatever, and there's websites that will show you all
Speaker 1: of the scenes, like this one scene of Rachel in
Speaker 1: a restaurant that hasn't been on television like ten years
Speaker 1: that they just caught for time and they felt it
Speaker 1: was unnecessary and so it's never aired. I feel cheated.
Speaker 1: I feel dirty. So HBO Max is showing, to my knowledge,
Speaker 1: the full episodes now, so you'll see the Monica dance
Speaker 1: and everything else that's been missing. So I would think
Speaker 1: there are some people maybe who have watched friends who
Speaker 1: have maybe never seen certain scenes that even Netflix didn't have. Now,
Speaker 1: do you have some other tweets? You do have a
Speaker 1: couple of things I want to read you, So I
Speaker 1: wanna so Mike Hansen underscore. I may have read this one,
Speaker 1: but he got a new fitbit and he said it's
Speaker 1: preloaded with Deezer, your favorite. That's why we need to
Speaker 1: be there. You make fun of me for wanting to
Speaker 1: get on Deezer the only the only platform, by the way,
Speaker 1: that carries podcast that we are not on. So hello,
Speaker 1: I told you. Freddie Gordon bought Um. Freddy Gordon Jr.
Speaker 1: Bought Metal Sparks after I said why don't they make
Speaker 1: metal sports? Why aren't they more popular? Um? He wanted
Speaker 1: to thank us because we mentioned him twice. He said,
Speaker 1: I feel I feel famous. Good guy. He showed me
Speaker 1: he sent the picture of him eating ices that were
Speaker 1: hard with his metal spark. That was the only thing
Speaker 1: that could dig into the ices and get the ices out.
Speaker 1: It was the perfect utensil. And he said, hashtag sports sponsor,
Speaker 1: hashtag Peter Millar sponsor. By the way, people are tweeting
Speaker 1: us in the morning and texting us that they're hearing
Speaker 1: the Peter Malaw commercials. See what hundred in New York
Speaker 1: is on right, damn it? Um, Now I'm getting spam
Speaker 1: on Instagram in my d m s. I'm sure we
Speaker 1: all get them, right. Um. But I reported them and
Speaker 1: deleted them, but not because they spammed me. So this
Speaker 1: was the message, h e e y parentheses, cat face,
Speaker 1: I wait you here? So they spelled hey wrong and
Speaker 1: then wrote I wait you here with an arrow, So
Speaker 1: just on the bad grammar. I blocked them and reported
Speaker 1: them because that's a fake account. And then another fake
Speaker 1: account wrote he h e y sad face, I and
Speaker 1: my girlfriends here what with a with an arrow? So
Speaker 1: if you're gonna stay m me, you better do it
Speaker 1: grammatically correct. That's what I'm saying. Um, we gotta you
Speaker 1: and I both got tweeted. Um. It's a picture of
Speaker 1: the front of a business and it's a big banner.
Speaker 1: It's a t x O b g y N at
Speaker 1: a t x O b g y n Austin. O
Speaker 1: b g y N associates with the big sign. Curb
Speaker 1: side visits. It's a guy no doing herb side visits.
Speaker 1: Have so many questions. Are you just like putting your
Speaker 1: legs up on the dashboard? Do you have to have
Speaker 1: a hatchback and you laid down in the back of
Speaker 1: your suv? What's going on there? Herb side visits for ginos.
Speaker 1: So here's what I'd like to do, scary next episode,
Speaker 1: you and I are gonna call O b g y
Speaker 1: N Associates and we'll go in Austin and we're gonna
Speaker 1: call them and ask him what goes on in a
Speaker 1: curbside visit? Do you wanna do that today or next time?
Speaker 1: I would go next time on that one, Okay, So
Speaker 1: now look, don't you do it and ruin the surprise
Speaker 1: for us? Um I'm looking to buy a laptop. I
Speaker 1: bought a laptop for my mom because they were sold
Speaker 1: out at garbage pails. Dumb dumbass. It's her birthday this
Speaker 1: week as well, and so I'm looking on the website
Speaker 1: of an electronics store. I think it's um. I don't
Speaker 1: want to say the wrong storks. I was on the
Speaker 1: website of a couple. First of all, laptops are sold out.
Speaker 1: You can't get affordable laptops because everybody's buying the cheap ones.
Speaker 1: I guess to get ready to go to college or
Speaker 1: go back to school or whatever. They're all gone. So
Speaker 1: I'm looking up to statistics and it says so one
Speaker 1: of them was estimated battery life. Right. You know on
Speaker 1: websites you can click like three or four and compare
Speaker 1: them and it shows you all of them side by
Speaker 1: side and the stats. So one of them had ten
Speaker 1: hour battery life, which is really good. One of them
Speaker 1: had six and a half hour battery life. This one
Speaker 1: says estimated battery life. This is my favorite part. Up
Speaker 1: to make sure you you listen, they sit up to
Speaker 1: up to t b D hours. Oh, the ambiguity of
Speaker 1: it all. So not just t b D hours. It's
Speaker 1: up to up to t D hours, right, so we'll
Speaker 1: let you know, but just know that it's up to
Speaker 1: a miscellaneous number of hours. They shouldn't be allowed to
Speaker 1: do that. They need to actually provide a number No,
Speaker 1: it's probably a very it's probably on the low side
Speaker 1: of t b D. Ours. Yeah, right, I guess they
Speaker 1: don't give a ship. There's a commercial running. I haven't
Speaker 1: gotten the audio from it. I'm gonna get it, but
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go ahead and tell you what the audio
Speaker 1: is and then we can play it maybe next week
Speaker 1: if I get the audio. It's about hiring your own. Um,
Speaker 1: it's one of these companies where you hire a centralized
Speaker 1: employee and then anyone who calls that eight hundred number.
Speaker 1: So rather than every company having like an HR an
Speaker 1: HR department person, you just hire an HR department person
Speaker 1: or a receptionist and then they answer the fall for
Speaker 1: like ten companies. So it sounds like you have a
Speaker 1: big company with a receptionist. So the guy says, or
Speaker 1: whoever was says, the first impression is so important. You
Speaker 1: can increase business up up to twenty five to up
Speaker 1: to up. That makes no sense. It's either not either
Speaker 1: or right. It's either somewhere up to twenty five to nine.
Speaker 1: Maybe it's really just up and then you're fucked. You
Speaker 1: make it. So basically it's t b D. It's tb D.
Speaker 1: That's so okay. So that's then we're gonna play some
Speaker 1: sound after we play some commercials. How about that, we're
Speaker 1: going back to commercial? Yeah, we have to, alright, I
Speaker 1: want to I want to rip a company. I want
Speaker 1: to rip some people, and I want to Can I
Speaker 1: tell you about the guy? What else? Back? I want
Speaker 1: to tell you about the guy I can't be friends
Speaker 1: with at Target? It's scary. I see the scar Sky
Speaker 1: Rizzy commercial sitting here in from Oh we want to
Speaker 1: do that first. Yeah, okay, So you know drug commercials,
Speaker 1: and they try to make it look like everybody's active
Speaker 1: having a good time, and they try to distract you
Speaker 1: while they're reading the list of illnesses and diseases and
Speaker 1: possible ways you could die right, loss of a lung,
Speaker 1: anal bleeding, heart attack, death, cancer. But the people are
Speaker 1: like sail boating and wind surfing and every great times.
Speaker 1: And I'm I'm rarely distracted by that because I'm paying
Speaker 1: attention to all the things that can kill me. So
Speaker 1: they distract you with the visuals usually, and then they
Speaker 1: have there while they're giving you the bad news now
Speaker 1: fine print, and you've many of you have seen this commercial.
Speaker 1: First of all, it features some very attractive women in
Speaker 1: very summary attire, sleeveless dresses. You know, it's very summary.
Speaker 1: Look and it's fun. It's a catchy jingle too. Well,
Speaker 1: that's the thing. They were in a convertible. They're dancing around,
Speaker 1: but the jingle. Now again they're singing about drugs that
Speaker 1: can ultimately possibly help you to kill you. Right. The
Speaker 1: side effects are horrific. But this song there's two parts
Speaker 1: because they talk in the middle and I had asked
Speaker 1: Scary to connect him and he didn't. So we're gonna play.
Speaker 1: Just listen, how freaking catchy this is. It's so catchy.
Speaker 1: Are getting clear nothing and hand in hand nothing on
Speaker 1: a skin? That's my new player, Keep your skin clearer?
Speaker 1: What's kind of easy. Three out of it right now?
Speaker 1: Play the second part. There's a third part place after
Speaker 1: two starter doses. I think the thing in a different way,
Speaker 1: and it's names your risking and stuff, and then they
Speaker 1: go on to tell you that it's gonna kill you, right,
Speaker 1: but I think the product clears up your skin. Yes, right,
Speaker 1: so you're right, okay, Now song that song every word
Speaker 1: clear is that Dosa Cat can't touch that song? That
Speaker 1: song is a hit. Yeah, sky Rizzy should be top
Speaker 1: five songs in America right now, I said, I walk
Speaker 1: around my day sing it, you know, when I'm online
Speaker 1: ordering a simple human garbage back. Nothing, everything right, And
Speaker 1: I don't like the sky Rizzy is like a made
Speaker 1: up a combination of words. It's it's like, you know,
Speaker 1: but but this ching and the girls are with attractive girls,
Speaker 1: and I mean that should be on the radio. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so I post alone is not doing a song that catchy.
Speaker 1: But but sky Rizzy is very clever because they got
Speaker 1: attractive women, they got a catchy jingle, and they're hoping
Speaker 1: you don't have them here that anal leakage is part
Speaker 1: of the side effects for this. Right, your boobs may
Speaker 1: fall into the ocean, but doesn't matter because they're windsurfing.
Speaker 1: Now we have we have well usually do we have
Speaker 1: a progressive all right? All right, So now I'm gonna
Speaker 1: give you a warning on the Progressive clip, just trying
Speaker 1: to be humorous. Leave your snowflaked him at the door. Okay,
Speaker 1: But there's a commercial for Progressive that features a bunch
Speaker 1: of people on a zoom meeting. Okay, and one of
Speaker 1: the guys who's a regular in the Progressive insurance commercials
Speaker 1: he's the skinny, blonde guy. He's kind of effeminine. Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm not saying he's gay. He just gives the impression
Speaker 1: he might be. Okay, In this particular commercial, he's trying
Speaker 1: to show that he grew a beard. He's like, oh,
Speaker 1: I haven't shaved, you know, because we're quarantined. But he
Speaker 1: doesn't have any beard, and they kind of making fun
Speaker 1: of him. Play the commercial. Listen to what the guy
Speaker 1: says at the end, keeping in mind that I think
Speaker 1: he might be gay. Play the clip and that protects
Speaker 1: our customers twenty for a second. Sorry, I'm later everybody,
Speaker 1: and apologies for my appearance. You're just look like a
Speaker 1: wanted boster. I didn't have time to get my beard
Speaker 1: routine in this morning. So what beard routine? Well, the
Speaker 1: key is Mabel Nectar gives it that cheene is there's
Speaker 1: something wrong in my screen? What's worry about? You're right, Alan,
Speaker 1: we should be talking about bundling home and auto with
Speaker 1: progressive and not. This's just made of mine, Jamie. Do
Speaker 1: you know what a beard is? Gay reference there, So
Speaker 1: he says like, do you know what a beard is?
Speaker 1: Because the guy obviously he doesn't have a beard. His
Speaker 1: face is completely clean shaven. But a beard is when
Speaker 1: someone who's gay and doesn't want people know he's gay,
Speaker 1: gets a girlfriend and pretends there is a girlfriend and
Speaker 1: people call that the beard. Like the beard, Yes, So
Speaker 1: I just I don't know if they plan that or
Speaker 1: they didn't realize it. I'm saying that I think they're
Speaker 1: leaning into it, to be quite honest, do you even
Speaker 1: know what a beard is? And I'm thinking that guy
Speaker 1: knows what a beard is, of course, And I guess
Speaker 1: guess what. I think that was written in as a script,
Speaker 1: and I think they're trying to poke fun and they're
Speaker 1: trying to h Yeah, they definitely on what they're saying,
Speaker 1: double entre. You think they deliberately referenced him all day,
Speaker 1: all day, Alright, there's no way that there's no way
Speaker 1: that they couldn't have realized that. I would think the
Speaker 1: actor would realize it. No, But my point is there's
Speaker 1: no way that everybody involved in that production, from the
Speaker 1: writers to the producers to the actors in it, didn't
Speaker 1: you know, I don't know the joke. Listen, maybe that
Speaker 1: guy's not gay, and so it never crossed their mind
Speaker 1: that it would be taken that way. Is that I mean,
Speaker 1: is that possible because that guy that guy is is
Speaker 1: yeahs off, he may be. He gives the impression he
Speaker 1: might be. Not that all gays are feminine, but he
Speaker 1: seems to specifically fits the bill. Okay, he's he's like,
Speaker 1: he's like Jack on Will and Grace Way. He's that
Speaker 1: kind of persona. So when the guy was like, do
Speaker 1: you even know what a beard is? I just I
Speaker 1: don't know. If you see the commercial, now let us
Speaker 1: know what you think. Now here's a song parody that
Speaker 1: was rejected from the Morning Show, but wasn't it was yet?
Speaker 1: Oh it was yeah, yeah, yeah, We're not gonna be
Speaker 1: playing this on the Big Show. So we usually do
Speaker 1: unused punch line. Did you ask him? Did you ask him? Yes?
Speaker 1: I usually we do unused punch lines. Did say did
Speaker 1: Elvis say what it was? Like? It was? It was
Speaker 1: a hard note, So usually do unused punch lines. So
Speaker 1: today we're gonna do an unused parody. And I didn't
Speaker 1: want to. I didn't want to. I didn't want to
Speaker 1: burst Prody's bubble. I'm like, really gonna do this? Okay, great, Well,
Speaker 1: this is the only time we're ever gonna hear it.
Speaker 1: This is a Brooklyn Boys exclusive, So it's just my take. Yeah,
Speaker 1: this is a simple human trash is Brody's rubber Maid parody.
Speaker 1: And now, by the way, you weren't calling Elvis trash.
Speaker 1: You were making a metaphor that simple human trash. I
Speaker 1: was going back. It was a recall from the simple
Speaker 1: human garbage pail discussion from earlier. Yes, okay, there was
Speaker 1: more of an analogy. I'm sorry. Okay, So this is
Speaker 1: my take on a song. You a real song you
Speaker 1: can't play right now and might take on the world
Speaker 1: as it is now and after after the double course
Speaker 1: at the end scare you can fade it out and
Speaker 1: it might seem crazy what I'm about to say. So
Speaker 1: Shine is here, I'm gonna stay away. If you go
Speaker 1: shop and put her mask on your face because the
Speaker 1: air we must be where, virus every place, because things
Speaker 1: are crappy. On your hands if you are sick of quarantine,
Speaker 1: because things are crappy. In your hands, if you're scared,
Speaker 1: there is no vaccine. Things are crappy. Have your hands,
Speaker 1: if you've seen the fires in the streets, because things
Speaker 1: are crappy. How your hands. If all you do is
Speaker 1: eat and sleep and eat bring me up? Can't nothing
Speaker 1: crappy bring me up? Since March, I'm inside bas won't
Speaker 1: go out at nothing crappy? Open now, I said, tell
Speaker 1: you now, be feeling down? Can nothing bring me up?
Speaker 1: My stress is too high from the shut down. Can't
Speaker 1: nothing crappy bring me up? I says things are crappy
Speaker 1: at the long. If you can't go to work or
Speaker 1: go to school because things are crapping on the long,
Speaker 1: if you have a former rotten tooth because things are
Speaker 1: crappy a long. If each night you're eating the same
Speaker 1: food because things are crappy up the long. If you
Speaker 1: feel like twenty is screwed because things are cropping, Okay,
Speaker 1: then as if the shows you we're good. Done, up
Speaker 1: your hands. If board games are no longer fun because
Speaker 1: up your head. If all of your puzzles haven't done,
Speaker 1: the things are crappy, have your hands. If you're but
Speaker 1: gained a powder, done there you go? No after thy seconds,
Speaker 1: I gotta be honest, hold on, were you were you
Speaker 1: adjusting the volume middle of the song. That might be
Speaker 1: the clean feed not feeding anyway, but anyway that aside um.
Speaker 1: I wasn't happy with the way the singer turned out
Speaker 1: not your best worlds Brody, You're brilliant when it comes
Speaker 1: to song parodies. That was not an example of that.
Speaker 1: It wasn't the first of all, it wasn't the vibe
Speaker 1: I wanted. UM. I had asked one singer to do
Speaker 1: it a certain way, he sucked at it. I asked
Speaker 1: a second singer to do it h And by the
Speaker 1: time I got that version back, I I was just
Speaker 1: kind of like, I can't anymore. And so I was
Speaker 1: going for a certain an angry behind the music. Now,
Speaker 1: by the way, I wanted the singer to be angry.
Speaker 1: I wanted it to be because a crappy And what
Speaker 1: I got was I felt like there was the singer
Speaker 1: should have been exasperated as they were doing the lyrics,
Speaker 1: like things are crappy. Yeah, I wanted that, and what
Speaker 1: I got was that so sometimes they're a hit. I
Speaker 1: thought it was a lyrical masterpiece. I will say I
Speaker 1: did write a song you could find on YouTube UM
Speaker 1: called say Their Names, which is a parody of Destiny's
Speaker 1: Child Say My Name and Uh. It plays into the
Speaker 1: theme of the protest marches. So if that's your thing,
Speaker 1: you can check that out on YouTube. It's under say
Speaker 1: their Names written by David Brody. That's the title. So
Speaker 1: go enjoy that. UM, I bought a shirt. I had
Speaker 1: told you to buy a shirt. Scary, I emailed you
Speaker 1: about three weeks ago. Well I know, I texted you.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry and I said, oh my god, I found
Speaker 1: this website. It's a sports memorabilia like you know, logo
Speaker 1: stuff for your favorite sports teams. The website is called
Speaker 1: sports fan t Okay. Now what it is is basically
Speaker 1: it's a shell that sells the same crap as UH fanatics,
Speaker 1: UM and MLBD shop dot com. They all have the
Speaker 1: same website. They just change the header. I don't know
Speaker 1: if you know this, and they change the sale code.
Speaker 1: So like MLB the code was bats and on sports Fantee,
Speaker 1: I think the code was like gloves. So it's a
Speaker 1: big scamboni. Um. They're all the same price, same merchandise.
Speaker 1: So you know those jerseys, their t shirts in the
Speaker 1: color of your your favorite baseball team, and they have
Speaker 1: the baseball logo the shirt, the team logo on this
Speaker 1: together and on the on the back it's got the
Speaker 1: name and number of the player. So it's a shirt jersey.
Speaker 1: It's a jersey. Now some people call them jerts, but
Speaker 1: those people are dumb k They're terrible people. They're terrible people.
Speaker 1: So I noticed the site was like, rather than get
Speaker 1: a player his name, you could get a customed with
Speaker 1: your name and number. So I sent it to Scary
Speaker 1: and he's like, oh, this is great. So I ordered mine.
Speaker 1: It took three weeks. A week ago, I said, hey,
Speaker 1: where the hell's my shirt? Because it said it's shipped.
Speaker 1: But then there's no tracking number. It hadn't shipped. Well,
Speaker 1: it arrived yesterday and it has the correct number I
Speaker 1: wanted on it. But it doesn't have the high quality
Speaker 1: graphics in the picture. The numbers are much smaller proportionally
Speaker 1: than the numbers of the picture. And that says your
Speaker 1: name and double zero and the name it says b
Speaker 1: R O D too much of a space. And then
Speaker 1: why it looks like Broad? Why it doesn't look like Brody.
Speaker 1: So it's not happy with the outcome of your jersey.
Speaker 1: It looks like, why said, fuck you, Broad, I'm going
Speaker 1: over here by right shoulder. I'm gonna go hang out
Speaker 1: by the right shoulder. You. I'm gonna post a picture
Speaker 1: of it, right, So I text I emailed them back
Speaker 1: and I said, hey, sports Fan t e the shirt arrived.
Speaker 1: It took three weeks, which is longer than you should
Speaker 1: that you then you said it would and the letters
Speaker 1: aren't spaced out properly and the numbers are too small.
Speaker 1: I would like to arrange a refund. They wrote me
Speaker 1: back and said, send us a picture, but we don't
Speaker 1: do returns or exchanges on custom merchandise. So I wrote
Speaker 1: back and I said, what's the purchase and be sending
Speaker 1: you a picture if you're not going to do a refund.
Speaker 1: And oh, by the way, you're going to be doing
Speaker 1: a refund one way or another, the easy way or
Speaker 1: the hard way, you will be returning my money. So
Speaker 1: I'm starting the process with our slices. I'm letting you know,
Speaker 1: don't buy the customize jersey from fan Graphs or whatever
Speaker 1: Fanatics all of them, they're all the same. If you
Speaker 1: if you google image customized jerseys, you'll see all eight websites.
Speaker 1: It's the same freaking website that just sells feed into
Speaker 1: the same place. They just bought a bunch of domain names.
Speaker 1: It's a big fucking Scamboni and MLB dot com, MLB
Speaker 1: shop dot com, they're guilty of it because it's the
Speaker 1: same website, so they don't like MLB. Hold on, God,
Speaker 1: so you guys got you think MLB shop dot com
Speaker 1: is like running their own website. Oh no, they're basically
Speaker 1: housing the shell of a site you can order merchandise.
Speaker 1: It's all outsourced. It's all outsourced. So I think my
Speaker 1: shirt came from China, China, China, China. Next, yeah, why
Speaker 1: don't you invest in a new microphone? Because it's now
Speaker 1: you're crackling. I feel like either that or you're melting
Speaker 1: the plastic on what you're talking. I hear you're talking
Speaker 1: about why did I buy? Why did I buy a
Speaker 1: snowball microphone? You say, because scary? Said my girlfriend has it.
Speaker 1: She loves it. You should my girlfriend, I I, I said,
Speaker 1: I said, my podcast partner share Share has But the
Speaker 1: thing is, I said, he's got two. She's got two snowballs.
Speaker 1: I said, there's another. There's another microphone you should go for.
Speaker 1: And that microphone is up five thousand dollars. No it's not.
Speaker 1: It's gold plated superhuman microphone. It's called YETI Blue. If
Speaker 1: you get it for under a hundred dollars, and you
Speaker 1: sound like gold, I got the YETI snowball. YETI Blue
Speaker 1: is the one you need, all right anyway, but continue,
Speaker 1: by the way, they called you that when you were
Speaker 1: a kid, right yet Blue, Yeah, tried to YETI blue himself. Yeah,
Speaker 1: all right, that's great. Now now you're now I'm piste off.
Speaker 1: And now we've been on for an hour and a
Speaker 1: half and I gotta go. Okay, yes I still haven't.
Speaker 1: I still haven't talked about the flip, the problem. I
Speaker 1: got so much to talk about. That's great, all right,
Speaker 1: you have something short, let's do it. I'll tell you what.
Speaker 1: They tried to screw me at the tire place, and
Speaker 1: I didn't people slices listen up. So I had the
Speaker 1: right front tire on my car fixed. I told you
Speaker 1: that last week right at Mavis Tire. I love Mavis Tire.
Speaker 1: But now I noticed my left front tire is leaking air.
Speaker 1: Like tire problem in two weeks to the other tire
Speaker 1: is leaking air and now like it was a slow leak, right,
Speaker 1: So I put an air in the tire and I
Speaker 1: figured out, I let's see how long it takes. So
Speaker 1: I'm driving on Monday or Tuesday, and I'm over in
Speaker 1: the shopping area in my in my town, right, the main,
Speaker 1: the main shopping street, the main, the main fair, you know,
Speaker 1: big wide Street, and you know where all the stores
Speaker 1: are exporting goods. I'm deep all to call the car
Speaker 1: dealerships and my tire it says low tire again. So
Speaker 1: I call. I call up the Mavis Tire place, not
Speaker 1: the one I always go to, but the one where
Speaker 1: I'm close to. And when you call Mavis Tire, they
Speaker 1: give you the corporate office, like the main sales department.
Speaker 1: Even if you call the branch, it goes to the
Speaker 1: main people. It doesn't go to the store, so they
Speaker 1: don't be they're not bothered by you. Right, So the
Speaker 1: guy tells me on the phone to fix the flat
Speaker 1: or the lead is twenty five dollars plus tax. Now scary.
Speaker 1: You know, when you go to the flat fixed places
Speaker 1: in the bad neighborhoods, it's fives, it's five dollars, nine dollars,
Speaker 1: it's not twenty five dollars. So I said, well, I said,
Speaker 1: I probably have like a nail in the tire. It's
Speaker 1: a slow leak. Yeah, but we we do a high
Speaker 1: quality job. I said, I just want you to pull
Speaker 1: the thing out and plug it. Oh no, no, I said,
Speaker 1: what am I getting for twenty five dollars? He says,
Speaker 1: we take the tire off the rim, we seal it
Speaker 1: from the outside and the inside, and then we rebalance
Speaker 1: it and mount it on the rim. We do the
Speaker 1: whole package. You're getting the best possible tire leak. Uh
Speaker 1: you know? And I said, why don't I just want
Speaker 1: you to take the nail out? It's probably a nail
Speaker 1: not we we trust me at a leak again? You
Speaker 1: want the best? I said, come on, man, I got
Speaker 1: my my leak fixed from the other Mavis. I think
Speaker 1: I think it was ten bucks. He says, I don't
Speaker 1: know what. I don't know what. I can't verify that.
Speaker 1: He's I'll give it to you for twenty I said,
Speaker 1: We'll have no choice my tires leaking, right, I'll come
Speaker 1: in fro twenty. So I go into the tired dealership.
Speaker 1: You know this is not gonna well, okay, come on,
Speaker 1: So I go in and you know what you know who?
Speaker 1: You should have known that going in. You know it's
Speaker 1: working on the counter. Mr and Mrs not covering your
Speaker 1: nose what your mask brigade? Most people by the way
Speaker 1: next week, I got a story. Hey, guess what the
Speaker 1: mask is so that you don't breathe or blow your nose,
Speaker 1: snots on me and give me coronavirus. Covering up your
Speaker 1: bottom lip isn't helping anybody covering your fucking face. So
Speaker 1: I stand twenty ft from the counter and I tell
Speaker 1: them the problem. Okay, So they go to the car
Speaker 1: and they take the card. Now, I've never been to
Speaker 1: a deal a tired dealership like this. Behind them is
Speaker 1: all windows and you can look right into the shop.
Speaker 1: And there were no cause there be mine. So I
Speaker 1: can look right through the window like it's like I'm
Speaker 1: a Disney World and you're seeing them service your car.
Speaker 1: I'm seeing him fix my tire. So the guy walks over.
Speaker 1: They put the car up on the lift and they
Speaker 1: look at the tire. He's staring at it. He's respinning
Speaker 1: it to see the whole tire, and I'm going right,
Speaker 1: he's gonna take the tire off the rim, he's gonna
Speaker 1: patch it from both sides, or he's gonna tell me
Speaker 1: tire can't be fixed and I gotta buy a new
Speaker 1: tire again. So I see him. He finds a nail
Speaker 1: He's like, I got the nail. He takes pliers, he
Speaker 1: pulls the nail out, he takes that other tool that
Speaker 1: shoves the rubbers, rubber stopper in the hole. He shaves
Speaker 1: it off and puts the car back down. But what
Speaker 1: happened to my service that I'm getting the twenty bucks?
Speaker 1: Where's the whole super flat fixed guy? So? I called
Speaker 1: I so Mr and Mrs King of nose sticking out.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna ask them. I call the number again.
Speaker 1: The guy says to me, how can I help you?
Speaker 1: I says this, Scott, Yeah, because it was Scott the
Speaker 1: last time. I say, Scott, tell me again. When I'm
Speaker 1: getting from my twenty bucks for flicking my tie. He says, uh,
Speaker 1: you know we're gonna take does the whole thing again?
Speaker 1: I said, well, I just watched the guy he pulled
Speaker 1: the nail out and stuck it with a with a
Speaker 1: cork and put my car back down. Why am I
Speaker 1: paying twenty dollars if he just did the same thing
Speaker 1: the guy at the flat fixed place, we'll do for five.
Speaker 1: Why would I pay twenty dollars for the super service?
Speaker 1: Did he think I wasn't watching? Does he think like
Speaker 1: I wasn't paying attention, like, oh, I'll just plug the
Speaker 1: thing up and charge him twenty bucks. No fucking way.
Speaker 1: So I say, Scott, I'm not paying twenty bucks. He said, well,
Speaker 1: you gotta pay for the tire. We fixed the flat.
Speaker 1: I go, I didn't get the Cadillac service. I got
Speaker 1: the k A service. I want the Cadillac service. He says, why,
Speaker 1: here's something we can do. There's no discount for the
Speaker 1: there's only one price. I said, there's only one price.
Speaker 1: Have a nice day, Scott, have a nice day. So
Speaker 1: I go inside, is said, excuse me, Mr nose sticking
Speaker 1: out guy, Can I speak to your manager? He says, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'll go get him Hector. He's not gonna get Hector.
Speaker 1: So Hector comes. I see him coming from a back room,
Speaker 1: storage room behind the cars. Hector comes out. Hector is
Speaker 1: one of these guys whereas Bell, he's hanging over the
Speaker 1: front of his pants and the back of his asses
Speaker 1: hanging out. Yeah, it looked like he had all his
Speaker 1: keys on his hip, but he had no keys. But
Speaker 1: you can just picture the keys on his hip. So
Speaker 1: he comes out and I see him walk towards the
Speaker 1: windows and the Mr knows, goes out to talk to him,
Speaker 1: and he tells him I want to speak to him. Now.
Speaker 1: Mr Nose doesn't know what my complaint is, but whatever,
Speaker 1: he said. Hector looks through the glass and gives me
Speaker 1: that that look like he just smelled bad fish. And
Speaker 1: again it's a window, I can see you. He could
Speaker 1: see him like giving you. He's giving me stink. I
Speaker 1: So Hector comes in and guess what Hector is wearing.
Speaker 1: He's wearing the chin mask. So I said, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: stand over here. Hector. Why, well, I'm sorry you're not
Speaker 1: wearing your mask. He says, yes, I am. I go right, Well,
Speaker 1: my definition of wearing a mask is over your nose,
Speaker 1: in your mouth. He says, oh, I'm sorry. I was working.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, and he puts it on. No problem. Mr
Speaker 1: and Mrs uh Nasal Spraye, they don't put their masks
Speaker 1: on their face, so I'm keeping away from them. So
Speaker 1: I said, hey, man, uh Scott at your corporate office
Speaker 1: told me I was getting the Cadillac at Tire Changes
Speaker 1: flat fixing for Bucks. Yeah, well you guy just plugged it.
Speaker 1: Took a nail out and plugged it. Because I asked
Speaker 1: the guy I said, hey, the guy who did my
Speaker 1: car when he brought my keys back, I said, what'd
Speaker 1: you do to my tire? Because always just a nail?
Speaker 1: I plugged it? Oh man, thanks appreciate it. So I said,
Speaker 1: you guy pulled the thing out, pulling nail out and
Speaker 1: he stuck a plug in. That's twenty five dollars discounted
Speaker 1: to twenty. So he looks at me, goes, uh, oh
Speaker 1: there was he pulled the nail out. Yeah. Uh. He
Speaker 1: looks at He looks at Captain nose guard and he says, uh,
Speaker 1: charge him ten bucks. Sorry, man, So I already paid
Speaker 1: ten bucks for the Cadillac of flat fixing. The guy
Speaker 1: did right by me anything he didn't. So now I'm
Speaker 1: wondering was he was he supposed to patch the inside
Speaker 1: of the tire, like, am I gonna? Is it gonna
Speaker 1: go flat again? Because you know that half far ten
Speaker 1: dollars get you at that place? Right? But I mean,
Speaker 1: but but here's the thing. Had I not said anything,
Speaker 1: had I not been watching the guy right, had I
Speaker 1: not been watching him through the glass, had I not
Speaker 1: been in the location where you could watch the guy,
Speaker 1: had I not questioned it, I would have paid another
Speaker 1: ten bucks on my tire. Had I not complained about
Speaker 1: twenty five dollars, I would have paid fifteen dollars more
Speaker 1: for the same work getting done. My point is don't
Speaker 1: let him fuck you. That's my advice. I hit the
Speaker 1: music now you and I don't let people fuck us
Speaker 1: because we're from Brockley Boys Boys Rob ro