Speaker 1: Hey guys, it's your girl, Mandy Bee from Horrible Decisions.
Speaker 1: And before we start this week's episode, I did want
Speaker 1: to give a trigger warning as you may come across
Speaker 1: content during this episode that you may disagree with, or
Speaker 1: an idea that makes you uncomfortable, or a statement that
Speaker 1: causes offense. Um, we do not mean to offend anyone
Speaker 1: in this week's episode. Now let's get on with the shot.
Speaker 1: Guess what decision we're about to make? Horrible Decisions. Hey, guys,
Speaker 1: welcome to another episode of V just as yawns. It's
Speaker 1: your girl, Oral be not mandybeeble oralba. Check the teeth, baby, Yes,
Speaker 1: that's right, it's Queen Latipa in the motherfucking building. Hi, y'all,
Speaker 1: I'm wheezy, welcome back for another episode. It's a new year,
Speaker 1: new teeth. I don't really go all of it. A
Speaker 1: lot of people haven't recognized the new with my real
Speaker 1: hair out, which is crazy. I walked right into my
Speaker 1: studio and they were like hello, I was like maybe
Speaker 1: so yeah, me without braids, I don't know. We know
Speaker 1: it gives Puerto Rican wait this year for going to
Speaker 1: be the year of the late weeks for me, y'all
Speaker 1: about to see me with all the different styles, textures, colors.
Speaker 1: I ain't got it right now, but they're coming, They're coming.
Speaker 1: I'm ordering them right now. I'm like yeah, I'm like, warmer,
Speaker 1: let me do one from Ali Baba. Then let me
Speaker 1: get the expensive one. I'm gonna mix the high and lows.
Speaker 1: You know what I mean. Y'all. We are joined today
Speaker 1: by a very special guest. I'm really excited because we're
Speaker 1: gonna get into some ships. We have some maya of
Speaker 1: Sexual Essential. Sorry, look the new teeth bitch I said
Speaker 1: too much Sexual Essentials and also the host of Not
Speaker 1: Just Another Sex podcast. Hello, baby, you should have been
Speaker 1: had a goddamn podcast. Now. I know that you've wanted
Speaker 1: to come on Horrible for a minute. And what I
Speaker 1: knew about your brand was like you were teaching people
Speaker 1: how to give yeah yeah, and then I remember you
Speaker 1: made a product. And that's what I know about Sexual Essentials.
Speaker 1: But what is Sexual Essentials so sexual? Well, first of all,
Speaker 1: hey y'all, hey, queen looks for Puerto Rican high until
Speaker 1: it goes with look at Thank you so much for
Speaker 1: having me. Um. Sexual Centials is a company that I
Speaker 1: designed to help people create the sex life that they want,
Speaker 1: whatever that looked like. But what I realized was that
Speaker 1: a lot of people didn't have any of the tools.
Speaker 1: Like everybody was kind of like talking or you could
Speaker 1: go hear someone talk about something, but people needed to
Speaker 1: practice sucking, dick riding and everything else. Um yeah, because
Speaker 1: we just talk over here, we talk over Yeah, we'll
Speaker 1: be using them. We'll be using them, good knees. What
Speaker 1: did you do before you made that company? Real estate?
Speaker 1: Real estate? I do both now, So I still still no, no, no,
Speaker 1: I just I did my own Um, I got into
Speaker 1: real estate, like bought my own property and stuff like that.
Speaker 1: Thank you, And so yeah, I'm excited. I'm excited. The
Speaker 1: classes were always the thing that got me out there
Speaker 1: because I was like, right, we're really sucondicting this class.
Speaker 1: What did they practice on? What did they suckt? Why
Speaker 1: not a vegetable? Well, I don't know all the details
Speaker 1: about putting stuff in your COUCHI that ain't supposed to
Speaker 1: be there, right, So there's one. And then also like
Speaker 1: your deal though, the ones especially that click on the wall.
Speaker 1: I like saving money and like stuff to be universe,
Speaker 1: like you could use it for more than one thing.
Speaker 1: They could stick that ship on the wall and your
Speaker 1: shower and throw it back and practice doing it by
Speaker 1: make them boy build though first, No, I bring it
Speaker 1: us to the class. I don't like so like y'all
Speaker 1: can have like a girl's now, ma'am. I want to
Speaker 1: safety wait, safety first, y'all. I don't know if you
Speaker 1: saw it. It went viral, but I also followed all
Speaker 1: the games and all the only fans people on TikTok
Speaker 1: and well on Twitter, but someone literally posted shattered glass,
Speaker 1: bloody feet, um, everything falling into their tubes. They were
Speaker 1: they were looking a suction cup in their shower and
Speaker 1: I guess it fell. They fell, They busted the whole
Speaker 1: goddamn shower. You know where it's so SA sat first,
Speaker 1: but they don't. That's a lot of people should know
Speaker 1: where there. Yeah, you know, damn well, if you ain't
Speaker 1: got no stable as shower, my shower caddy falls down.
Speaker 1: And even I trust, but you know that you know that.
Speaker 1: But I'll saw even your wall like I like the
Speaker 1: suction cup ones. And then like even if you're sending
Speaker 1: like news to switch it up, you can use your
Speaker 1: deal though, to be like you know, deep throwing with
Speaker 1: it or even just playing with yourself, like you use
Speaker 1: that from multiple things. So I like the deal though,
Speaker 1: the riding class and them things be giving them three
Speaker 1: type of suction. So I hope you'll have the color
Speaker 1: of your wall the paint in a in a closet
Speaker 1: somewhere because it's given that deal though, about to grab
Speaker 1: the paint off my suction cup build though, looks like
Speaker 1: right now it's in my guest room, which is that
Speaker 1: my closet and it's stuck on the wall with necklaces
Speaker 1: hanging from it. Well, you said duel you could use
Speaker 1: if you can, and you know, that's when I learned
Speaker 1: that people really did not know what the funk they
Speaker 1: was doing, and so like even when like it was
Speaker 1: really bad, and I was like, Okay, maybe the men
Speaker 1: ain't tripping when they're saying like the women are lazy.
Speaker 1: But I think also some of the reasons they were
Speaker 1: lazy because they really didn't know how to do it,
Speaker 1: and like embarrassment and things like just don't want to
Speaker 1: do it. Yeah, but I also really didn't know. Like
Speaker 1: I would always watch in the class you gotta suck
Speaker 1: dy before I teach you anything, because I need to
Speaker 1: know what you're doing. I actually have a double advocate
Speaker 1: point of view on this. Hit me with you, So
Speaker 1: I do think you can teach someone how to suck dick. However,
Speaker 1: I don't think it'll be as good unless you actually
Speaker 1: like doing it. The one thing I think you can
Speaker 1: benefit from from a class is most people probably don't
Speaker 1: like it because they're not good at it, you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. Like there's a reason we all probably
Speaker 1: don't like to run because maybe we aren't running, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. But if you start working at
Speaker 1: the ship, then you're like, oh, now I need to
Speaker 1: go to the gym with dick sucking on. That's it.
Speaker 1: Because I've recently been talking to friends about like about
Speaker 1: it and been shocked that they don't like sucking dick.
Speaker 1: I'm like, bro, what I have a home girl who's
Speaker 1: fine and ship huge TVs. Badass, And she said, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna tell you so I'm embarrassing. I said, tell me
Speaker 1: and she was like, I'll be laying there, bro, oh
Speaker 1: pillar princess. Ye. She was like, there's even an art
Speaker 1: to that, Like there's even an art, there's all art
Speaker 1: to just laying there to pill Princess part, it's the desire.
Speaker 1: It's just like with sucking dick, it's the desire. If
Speaker 1: you there is nothing sexier than when you're doing something
Speaker 1: to somebody and you could tell they really want it
Speaker 1: from like they need that ship, like they're not keeping
Speaker 1: no cool about it. They really want it. So and
Speaker 1: even the desire of being able to lay there and
Speaker 1: just let a man do something to you, I feel
Speaker 1: like that's sexiest. And I don't think a lot of
Speaker 1: people are even interactive when they're on the bottom. But
Speaker 1: I've even had to practice my pillow Princess. No, no,
Speaker 1: you're talking about two different things, I thinks. But she
Speaker 1: asked a man what they liked the most about sex.
Speaker 1: It's your response and allow. It's not about like when
Speaker 1: I'm in my pillow, Princess, mo, that means that I'm
Speaker 1: not picture you. I'm you're there to please me. They'd
Speaker 1: be surprised how well they take direction, like if you
Speaker 1: tell them go faster, like they like direction. They like
Speaker 1: being good at ship. So you're laying there and not
Speaker 1: saying fuck them, but basically funck them, like right now,
Speaker 1: you are my toy, you know what. I'm also ladies
Speaker 1: be careful with the word deeper because that nigga might
Speaker 1: not have more to give you. He might not have
Speaker 1: no more to give you. All right, well we're gonna
Speaker 1: get into our ice. It just means hit the pelvic
Speaker 1: bone if you really ain't got no, no, no, don't
Speaker 1: hurt me now. I don't want to know what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: like if they got a short with me. When I
Speaker 1: say that you want ya, I'm trying to look like, right,
Speaker 1: I'm trying to figure out why why do I be
Speaker 1: saying it. I'm like, when I say it in that moment,
Speaker 1: I feel like it's because you're almost about to hit
Speaker 1: a spot. I want to tell her. I was about
Speaker 1: to say, if I say deeper, it's because at this
Speaker 1: point I want pain, because it's not it's not really
Speaker 1: enjoyable now if the nigga's dick is little and it's
Speaker 1: just not even in there. But normally when I stay
Speaker 1: deeper or harder, it's because, okay, I want to hurt now,
Speaker 1: I want something. Yeah, it's never really about the enjoyment.
Speaker 1: I like the slow rolling sex, like just a good
Speaker 1: dick will get the job done. But when I say
Speaker 1: like deeper and harder, it is definitely some good medium
Speaker 1: dick recently and he hit the spot. Let's do for you?
Speaker 1: Is this? The medium medium dick is very versatile. It
Speaker 1: is out of it though, and that part was kind
Speaker 1: of fun. I really like ring, I like writing two.
Speaker 1: It's but like I realized, a medium dick, I feel
Speaker 1: like that's your part where you really get to time.
Speaker 1: Let's just standing on the couch and writing ship and
Speaker 1: really I'm just it ain't even really right. I'm just
Speaker 1: sitting there, that's all I'm doing. Well, let's get into
Speaker 1: our icebreakers this or that. We're gonna run down this
Speaker 1: quickly because clearly you don't came in with all the sauce.
Speaker 1: So broke big dick or rich little dick. I don't
Speaker 1: even have the same sex. We we already froke just
Speaker 1: sex something broke big bron for anybody's gonna say that
Speaker 1: for just saying, okay, so relationship. I'm gonna go with
Speaker 1: the rich little bit. Will term with a rich little
Speaker 1: dick over a broke big dick, Yes, because I mean,
Speaker 1: if you know what you're doing sexually, it really doesn't
Speaker 1: matter the size. I've had some of the best orgasms
Speaker 1: in my life. From a small dick nigger, they do
Speaker 1: a lot, a lot they know they got to do more.
Speaker 1: But also like when you're fully around or you've been
Speaker 1: getting fingered in when you when you do um, when
Speaker 1: the pussy is like fully aroused, it swells up so much.
Speaker 1: So you know how like when you've been real horning
Speaker 1: and somebody put their fingers in you and that ship
Speaker 1: feels good. Think about it. Look how small yo love
Speaker 1: God damn fingers. So when you get really really aroused,
Speaker 1: and I feel like when you with somebody as super small,
Speaker 1: they usually know that they're small, so the four play
Speaker 1: be a fucking one. They'd be eating pussy like crazy.
Speaker 1: So by the time you're sticking the dick in anyway,
Speaker 1: I pussy just hell already now quickies and ship like that.
Speaker 1: We may not be as good with because I need
Speaker 1: more time to get there, but I would right, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna find a way to get everything I want. And
Speaker 1: a small dick nigger can use toys, use everything crossed
Speaker 1: over where I like, I hold them together and let
Speaker 1: him get in there, and I'd be like, cris cross
Speaker 1: your legs so I feel a little tight. I do
Speaker 1: that too, even with big dicks. All right, you gotta
Speaker 1: do that ship when you're throwing it back like kind
Speaker 1: of Oh, I love it. I like to open it
Speaker 1: up a little bit, like let's just see it. I
Speaker 1: feel like I feel like the thighs like when you
Speaker 1: kind of like clapping on dick and throw it back like, No,
Speaker 1: my problem with doing that with a little dick though,
Speaker 1: the nigga don't know whether he's in my pussy or
Speaker 1: my thighs now, So that's a real, a real problem.
Speaker 1: That's a real problem. Now, which of the these are
Speaker 1: too too bad awful things? But would you rather car
Speaker 1: sex or shower sex? Car sex over shower sex? Girls
Speaker 1: to be to be filling if I filled in the
Speaker 1: shower enjoy, I don't enjoy water sex. Yeah, crazy, I'm okay, okay,
Speaker 1: not mad. And the last one only cause you're a
Speaker 1: nasty free cod. We're gonna get to it. Would you
Speaker 1: rather golden showers or boo cocky? What's book cocky? You
Speaker 1: talk secon don't know, bukky and authetic because you like
Speaker 1: m m F three SOMs? What so bloukcky is getting
Speaker 1: ejaculated on by multiples? Absolutely not no, no, not a
Speaker 1: piss on me, you have pissed, I'd rather have pissed
Speaker 1: because even in my in my male male female threes
Speaker 1: some fantasy, it's all like worship, so it's very much
Speaker 1: so I'm not you. I don't even want to suck.
Speaker 1: You don't even come. I ain't gonna say that, but
Speaker 1: I don't want to want to be catered to. I
Speaker 1: want to be catered to some more central And I
Speaker 1: can't imagine multiple diacks not know me being like if
Speaker 1: it's part of my I don't understand how piss gives
Speaker 1: more cater than honestly, depending on who you sucking, how
Speaker 1: nasty be you'd be like, I don't give a funk
Speaker 1: what you do to me. So you have been paid
Speaker 1: on before, but I would I mean, I ain't guts
Speaker 1: like in a shower right now. You haven't done anything,
Speaker 1: not in a shower. I I'm not really on bodily
Speaker 1: fluids like that, okay, not even seeming. I mean, I'm
Speaker 1: fine with it, but she asked between the two and
Speaker 1: my male male female threesome is like me being like God,
Speaker 1: it's like Aphrodite type ship, like you serving me like
Speaker 1: y'are serving me with this? Why would you be nothing
Speaker 1: no way, more like the grade into me thing, because
Speaker 1: we can we can come on the regular. Well technically,
Speaker 1: if you were well, not only that, if you are
Speaker 1: stuck in like a desert or stuck on an island somewhere,
Speaker 1: they actually say that you can drink your own piss
Speaker 1: and you can survive on for drinking. I don't know
Speaker 1: where this why this was relative well, because the one
Speaker 1: of them, no, no, no, I'm just saying it messed
Speaker 1: up my It messes up my male male female three
Speaker 1: threesome fantasy. Fantasy is like Super Central and y'all no, no,
Speaker 1: my face. I said, you're not drinking. You change your lifestyle.
Speaker 1: You said I got to drink the well, no bukaki
Speaker 1: for protein. At this point, let's yes, you gotta drink it.
Speaker 1: You got to drink. I don't want to, so you
Speaker 1: don't want to. I wouldn't want to drink. Speaking of
Speaker 1: bodily fluids are na ship, this week UM is quite
Speaker 1: crazy because of course the UM s n M d
Speaker 1: S M Nasty Free co's have landed on TikTok. Not
Speaker 1: a surprise, but I want to share two of these
Speaker 1: trends that have actually land They have landed to TikTok
Speaker 1: that is nuts um. This one specific TikTok er um
Speaker 1: bakes sour dough bread using her own vaginal yeast. That
Speaker 1: is correct, y'all um. Thanks to feminist bloggers, Zoe Savre
Speaker 1: definitely given quite um after getting a pretty bad yeast infection,
Speaker 1: was inspired by the idea to turn her discomfort into
Speaker 1: delicious baked Never have I ever seen my own discharge
Speaker 1: and thought, let me put it in a dish. Waking
Speaker 1: up on Saturday with the familiar itchy Bernie fanny, I
Speaker 1: giggled to myself, maybe I could make bread with that,
Speaker 1: and that ticked into well, I've always wanted to try
Speaker 1: making my own sour dough anyway. Now, what do you
Speaker 1: do it for? Say? High demand? I mean, it doesn't
Speaker 1: say she sells it. She did say, I'm just saying
Speaker 1: got somebody wants the bread again, and you're like, well, damn,
Speaker 1: I should kind of got better. But if you're ready
Speaker 1: to listen, this is how she did it. She says,
Speaker 1: she got carries and the next thing that happened was
Speaker 1: she scraped white goop off of a dildo into a
Speaker 1: bowl and mix it with flour and water. This is
Speaker 1: so nasty. I think the nastiest thing we ever did
Speaker 1: is a susy thing that pretty fucking bad. It says.
Speaker 1: The yeast from her vagina is no less gross than
Speaker 1: any other yeast that we used to make bread. She says,
Speaker 1: making sour dough, starter and tail. I mean it's her
Speaker 1: own if she's eating it and not selling it. If
Speaker 1: it's her own, I am less judgment, but I ain't
Speaker 1: allow to you A little bit of judgment came up there.
Speaker 1: But I do things with my juices. We real quick too.
Speaker 1: She also like taste them. I mean yeah, I mean,
Speaker 1: do you your juices? Do you do it with your
Speaker 1: yeast and your bacteria? Bacteria is the problem. It's it's
Speaker 1: like it is the good. It's not the good. This
Speaker 1: was the whole infection I liked. I like you are
Speaker 1: cooking with the speaking of good bacteria. The medium naked
Speaker 1: that I sucked recently, he said something to me that
Speaker 1: really had me concerned for women. Now, I would assume,
Speaker 1: being that he's rich, she pokes a lot of bitches,
Speaker 1: and he definitely does. So we get done sucking, and
Speaker 1: he says how he couldn't believe how wet I was,
Speaker 1: and he was like I always felt like we were
Speaker 1: gonna have a good sex, and like I knew you
Speaker 1: had good pussy. Was like that was like a lot,
Speaker 1: Like I'm shocked and that's and he's like, you got
Speaker 1: good pussy. I was like it was just good because
Speaker 1: it was wet. I'm populating. He was like, nah, because
Speaker 1: wet pussy ain't always good if he's saying, and I'm like, nah,
Speaker 1: that ain't true because that bitches who said it's literally
Speaker 1: fifty fifty for me, he said, the more juices and
Speaker 1: like wet a girl against the more sticky like all
Speaker 1: of that. He's like, I mean there's more sex musk
Speaker 1: that Nigga said, thank yeah no, But you know what
Speaker 1: Nick Cannon did said the same thing when he was
Speaker 1: talking about eight of women. But it's like a lot
Speaker 1: of men still whatever reason. Mind you you don't have
Speaker 1: twelve babies in like the last two years, so you
Speaker 1: ain't having over You also are not using condoms clearly
Speaker 1: with all these different women that you're fucking. And that's
Speaker 1: what men don't know, y'all. Dick is the reason why
Speaker 1: our pussies be sank. If you really want to know,
Speaker 1: if it be stink nine times out of tennis because
Speaker 1: of the partners that we're engaging with. And I've said
Speaker 1: it all the time. I knew my last nigga was
Speaker 1: for me because he ain't suck up my pH I said, oh,
Speaker 1: you would give a half and half. I eat pussy,
Speaker 1: So I eat pussy too. A girl with the egos
Speaker 1: in here, I don't come across that many stink cooches.
Speaker 1: And also never eating. I feel like I've also never
Speaker 1: eat no pussy. That was like I ain't gonna say
Speaker 1: fresh out of the shower, but like it's been all day.
Speaker 1: But I'm gonna say this. I think men never eat.
Speaker 1: I think we've had that experience because men are thinking
Speaker 1: pussy is supposed to smell different. You all day pussy,
Speaker 1: I thought, I have a girlfriends. I've never ate ate
Speaker 1: pussy in the strip club on the float. I talked
Speaker 1: about this on the pot. It was outside clubbing. It
Speaker 1: was like four o'clock in the morning. I ate my
Speaker 1: home girl in the strip club in the private room
Speaker 1: on the float. I've never eaten. Oh yeah, it was
Speaker 1: all day. If you with me now, if you with me,
Speaker 1: like if we in the house type things now, like
Speaker 1: I didn't have back in the morning. I don't eat
Speaker 1: after the club pussy, like you gotta shower first, Like
Speaker 1: I wouldn't want nobody it wasn't after it was I
Speaker 1: don't want nobody eat my pussy after I left the club.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be stuff conscious all like like my I
Speaker 1: got thick ass tied. Like I'm not saying y'all don't,
Speaker 1: but you know what I'm saying. They're doing like this,
Speaker 1: got a little sweat, like your hands take a little
Speaker 1: white bitch just be having wipes in their bags, giving
Speaker 1: nigga a baby white pussy. I like your fish, but
Speaker 1: you're giving She just said, would you give a nigga
Speaker 1: baby white pussy? Because I'd be giving niggas baby but yeah,
Speaker 1: so you wouldn't I eat. I know that's what's going on.
Speaker 1: I'm like, she got put on. I mean, I get it,
Speaker 1: but I just I don't want to be in one
Speaker 1: of these situations where I'm like, baby, I'm like, you're
Speaker 1: gonna have to go show like it's going to be
Speaker 1: so accurate that it was fun. I mean, I wouldn't
Speaker 1: stop talking to somebody. So I think it's normal, like
Speaker 1: sometimes your pussy think like when my should expire, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna get a shower, but when I should expire, we're
Speaker 1: gonna pass on tonight until I figure out why it's expired.
Speaker 1: Sometimes like during the day it expires it, but it's
Speaker 1: just time to get in the shower, you know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying. Like I'm talking about that. Like also a
Speaker 1: way to keep your pussy like no lie, like just
Speaker 1: smelling the best that you can through all day. Pussy.
Speaker 1: You gotta really wipe when you pe do yes, and
Speaker 1: you need to stay on that toilet for a while,
Speaker 1: like like sometimes gave it to you and let the
Speaker 1: ship come out because it's still being your pinny and
Speaker 1: you know, and if you got a fat pussy too,
Speaker 1: sometimes I had to like really like open the lips
Speaker 1: and like take the tissue in thee because I don't
Speaker 1: know if y'all saw the other videos that went viral,
Speaker 1: there's niggas that believe when bitches is on a period,
Speaker 1: they got to remove they tamp on the piss they
Speaker 1: think it comes out of that hole. Did you'll see Yeah,
Speaker 1: I didn't see that. It's it's nuts. These men don't
Speaker 1: even know us, So yes, I actually used to shift
Speaker 1: to say though like that isn't surprising. Women gotta shake
Speaker 1: like how many shape? But women don't be knowing how
Speaker 1: many holes they have, Like I don't think that men
Speaker 1: thinking that it's surprising, Like I think not knowing clip
Speaker 1: is surprising, but that you know, that's all I need
Speaker 1: you to notice. Two wholes look turned on the lights.
Speaker 1: Like I start to have classes when I'm having sex,
Speaker 1: Like let's talk about it. Everybody vibe ain't gonna be sexy.
Speaker 1: It's fun like some people is kind of like we
Speaker 1: inquisitive and ship like that. But I'm okay with the
Speaker 1: educational fuck me session? What do you mean? We're kind
Speaker 1: of stuff to you like to teach. Well, if I
Speaker 1: was eating your pussy, I would be like like talking
Speaker 1: me through it, like how do you how do you
Speaker 1: like your pussyting? I don't just have seen through? Yeah,
Speaker 1: like talk me through it, and like I do I
Speaker 1: want to see my mouth like I'm not about to
Speaker 1: do it, like as we're sitting on the edge of
Speaker 1: the bed, no bed like no because the last song
Speaker 1: like while we into it, like while we into it.
Speaker 1: I like education. I'm a nerd. I like educational. It
Speaker 1: depends some people. I feel like you don't I'm a
Speaker 1: just moan. I'm gonna let you know you're doing a
Speaker 1: good job. If I'm motherfucker there now, if I hold
Speaker 1: you to stay down there, and then I do like
Speaker 1: some wrestling move where I move my leg and I'll
Speaker 1: put it over your neck like nigga there and then
Speaker 1: I'm owned. But like I'll do them type of movements
Speaker 1: like it's giving wrestling moves to let you know you're
Speaker 1: doing it. You're doing it? Good job? Did you doing
Speaker 1: a good job? Look here? I will say I have
Speaker 1: stopped talking so much about that stay right there because
Speaker 1: somebody hit me with the stay right there and I
Speaker 1: was like, oh my god, my nick moment. Well, I'm
Speaker 1: sure they're not in an uncomfortable position, do I do?
Speaker 1: Didn't want to go into that, you said that almost happened.
Speaker 1: We have a new segment that was introduced called horror Stories,
Speaker 1: and I would love to know if you have a
Speaker 1: horror story, whether dating or in the bedroom, I give
Speaker 1: it you. Guys. Ever used a glass deal though? Yeah,
Speaker 1: I love glass double double double dildo and I have
Speaker 1: never though put it in the freezer or changed the temperature,
Speaker 1: but I have used and that that is I like
Speaker 1: them they're clean. They are you always think, I know
Speaker 1: ploores like no ploors, so um, you know, sucking black man.
Speaker 1: Sometimes the deep don't go on your ass, um it's
Speaker 1: just too big and okay, I love that for y'all,
Speaker 1: but so stop for everybody. Um. So, I was, you know,
Speaker 1: doing a um like some clips stimulation with with the
Speaker 1: guy and we used the glass dial though, and you know,
Speaker 1: and I'm talking about it felt amazing literally ironically and
Speaker 1: like I'm having an orgasm, so like I'm using the
Speaker 1: clear stimulator on my clip and then he's like sucking
Speaker 1: my ass with the glass still though, so it feels amazing.
Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, yeah, it feels so first of all,
Speaker 1: and no orgasms are I've shared my experience. It's a
Speaker 1: thing like like women didn't get there too if you
Speaker 1: put your finger like even in my ask the way
Speaker 1: my pussy responds, I ain't never seen no ship like that.
Speaker 1: Like anyways, yeah, again ironically, and so then I start
Speaker 1: smelling something and I'm like, wait, you know, like that
Speaker 1: lip quiver like because he's sucking yours and he's now
Speaker 1: he's watching and I'm on the edge of the bed,
Speaker 1: legs up, so in mind you. He was like an
Speaker 1: older guy like and he's very mature and he ain't
Speaker 1: saying nothing, and so and we had the towel out,
Speaker 1: like you know, next to it, and I said, and
Speaker 1: I looked and like he he pulled it out and
Speaker 1: it was like ship everywhere. He was like, it's okay,
Speaker 1: I'm not get out, get out. You don't want to
Speaker 1: get out. I'm not like out of the house, but
Speaker 1: out of my room, like get out. Closed the door,
Speaker 1: like I got it out, and it was he saw
Speaker 1: like he wouldnew what I was. But I was about
Speaker 1: to freak the funk out, like I don't how much
Speaker 1: it wasn't it was like it was an amount more
Speaker 1: than Medina's. Wasn't a ski burger, was not a children amount.
Speaker 1: It was like he pulled a hole turn up. No,
Speaker 1: not a holt, but it was like a shark like
Speaker 1: but like so much. But it was like no, no, no,
Speaker 1: it was like the amount you had. It was on
Speaker 1: it was all over the towel and like I felt
Speaker 1: it like on my like on the back of my God.
Speaker 1: So I'm mortified, but I'm like I did the things.
Speaker 1: I went to the bath, throw might eat nothingpole like
Speaker 1: I did. But but the real question after the ship
Speaker 1: he was so fine. He was like, okay, but you no,
Speaker 1: I'll go back. So y'all didn't work again? Yeah, we
Speaker 1: worked again. Yeah, but I'm just saying like in that moment,
Speaker 1: I definitely freaked out and I was like, yo, like
Speaker 1: I'm in the bathroom. I'm like, ain't know what, like
Speaker 1: I gotta get in a shower, like this is just
Speaker 1: so awkward that it happened. But I'm the one who
Speaker 1: handled it, like I don't know how to I was
Speaker 1: that shitty check. I wasn't shy, don't clearly, but he
Speaker 1: was in there like that's the most Also, that was
Speaker 1: the most ain't know I had ever had, because of course,
Speaker 1: with a real dick, you know they're going slower, you'd
Speaker 1: be yeah, sometimes it's not even a whole dick in there,
Speaker 1: and it feels great. But with the glass dial though,
Speaker 1: he was smaller. So she all up and I'm going
Speaker 1: going and I'm like this had to come out before
Speaker 1: this while you stop, like you get off my phonel.
Speaker 1: Just how this happened. One of my friends that's kind
Speaker 1: of hot was just constipated, does not have sex choice. Okay,
Speaker 1: this person was like, so I got food poison recently
Speaker 1: on vacation. I was like, bro, I've never shipped so much.
Speaker 1: And he was like, the opposite ship happened to me
Speaker 1: And I was like, what happened? He was like, bro,
Speaker 1: I could feel that it wouldn't come out. How to
Speaker 1: use a toothbrush? Wait? He said, he googled right what
Speaker 1: you have to do to break up this ship? And
Speaker 1: he told me he put a toothbrush in his ass
Speaker 1: to break up being constipated so that he could s
Speaker 1: There are so many more. There's a lot of were
Speaker 1: recommending skinny. He ain't going to he everywhere, but Babe,
Speaker 1: his iPhone is his algorithms. I couldn't even use one
Speaker 1: of new little baby basters. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: They be sticking in your nancy as pink ass, pepto bismol. Big.
Speaker 1: He was, there's feeling that we were into like a
Speaker 1: text thread, and he was like, I was like, how
Speaker 1: you feeling? And he was like today two in no's
Speaker 1: given that he just wanted to six something small up
Speaker 1: his ass. But in school he stopped and he said
Speaker 1: it came out right after that. I did aways got
Speaker 1: come back around before well we know that clearly you
Speaker 1: into all the kink stuff. We have a segment called
Speaker 1: Hord derv and we need for you to give us
Speaker 1: a sex tip. And at this point, no sex tip
Speaker 1: on antlesex because I think you need to find on
Speaker 1: your own. Um, but if you could give us, you
Speaker 1: know what, I want to spruce it up a bit.
Speaker 1: Any any sex tip that aligns with a specific kink
Speaker 1: or fetish. So if you can even maybe say what
Speaker 1: the kinker fetishes and then go into a sex tip
Speaker 1: for that, make it really damn I like school, all right.
Speaker 1: I don't know if it's gonna do anything, but these
Speaker 1: my tips. Okay, alright, So my tip is when somebody
Speaker 1: gives you a king right. A lot of times we
Speaker 1: think about the extreme, we go real, we go to
Speaker 1: a hunter right. And what I want to encourage people
Speaker 1: to do is figure out what does that kink look
Speaker 1: like in a smaller capacity. So for example, if you're
Speaker 1: having a threesome with somebody, Um, whenever I've had a
Speaker 1: threesome with my partner, I fantasized vocally with them in
Speaker 1: bed about the person that we wanted to have a
Speaker 1: three somewhere, like if it was a person that we knew,
Speaker 1: you know, and saw what happened. Like I fantasized about friends,
Speaker 1: thanks friends, um, about all kinds of things like in
Speaker 1: a you know we're talking about it, like because I
Speaker 1: don't know if I actually wanna have sex with my
Speaker 1: friends sometimes with with my dude. You know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: Single right now, don't get that confused. Um, but you
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying. Some of those settings. UM. Also
Speaker 1: hiring people for the kinks of course that you want
Speaker 1: to do. Um. So I have this thing where I'm
Speaker 1: getting into I kind of want to do like a dominatrix,
Speaker 1: like study that right. Um. But one of the ways
Speaker 1: that I've been practicing that is just hiring a submissive
Speaker 1: to clean my house. Um, where do you just why
Speaker 1: do you need to hire that? If that's what it's
Speaker 1: a different if I don't have to commit, if it's
Speaker 1: a service, yes, and versus when you're someone's down, um down,
Speaker 1: you have to you're really serving them, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. But me getting more comfortable with wanting to
Speaker 1: how I talk to people, like I'm pretty polite, Like
Speaker 1: I'm really nice. I might be able to introduce you
Speaker 1: to when I had a sub that offered to come
Speaker 1: and he was like, I'll just clean your house, I'll
Speaker 1: rub your feet, I'll do all these things, and you know,
Speaker 1: I'll just do whatever you want me to do. And
Speaker 1: he just wanted to serve me. I had actually met
Speaker 1: him at a at a fed dinner and I was like, um,
Speaker 1: I was actually as much as I believe I'm a
Speaker 1: really dominant person in the bedroom, having an actual submissive
Speaker 1: actually scared the fucking shift out of me. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I was like, you want me to tell you to
Speaker 1: turn the lights on? And often because again my mind
Speaker 1: went to the extreme, like you're saying. So when he
Speaker 1: was like I just want to come over and do
Speaker 1: your laundry and do all that, I was like, not
Speaker 1: to be something else you want to do? Like what
Speaker 1: more do I have to do? I talk crazy to
Speaker 1: you do and there was just my mind went so
Speaker 1: crazy to where I was like, there's no way I
Speaker 1: can have. I feel like the second and there they're
Speaker 1: gonna want more. It's absolutely nothing sex, No, it's only
Speaker 1: what you want. They that their job is to do
Speaker 1: what you want. So like the reason that I like
Speaker 1: hiring ath so like even for the art exhibit, it's
Speaker 1: a live sex. Are sure I put on the You know,
Speaker 1: if you're doing an event, you can't get exhausted. You
Speaker 1: do not remember drinking of water to eat, none of
Speaker 1: that stuff. I hired um Wanna Buana for the art exhibit.
Speaker 1: He followed me around all day like he had like
Speaker 1: he had the mask on everything, which turned me on
Speaker 1: just watching him in a suit and like this mask
Speaker 1: and was like it was that very high. Um. I
Speaker 1: even like the fact that even me walking around and
Speaker 1: other men approaching me and it's like they're just man
Speaker 1: right here, like like my almost like a security guard.
Speaker 1: But I don't know if I could commit to a
Speaker 1: because even a dom SIB relationship is a relationship. I
Speaker 1: don't know if I admit to it. So even bringing
Speaker 1: that down a notch and saying, you know what, I'm
Speaker 1: hiring a submissive for the day and just even figuring out,
Speaker 1: I don't want to commit to ship and so I
Speaker 1: know for sure what I like about this specific Did
Speaker 1: you want that dynamic in a relationship or is this
Speaker 1: something you feel like you just get the urge from
Speaker 1: time to time to do it depends, because my I
Speaker 1: cannot I don't know if I can humiliate a partner.
Speaker 1: I don't desire that, Like for dating like my black man,
Speaker 1: I couldnot imagine like talking crazy you use submissive no,
Speaker 1: but I'm saying like the man I'm dating like and
Speaker 1: forever and saying ship like that's actually kind of fun.
Speaker 1: I would feel like you don't have to pay them.
Speaker 1: You know. Also even just having me, I feel like
Speaker 1: it's a dom is a treat, and I don't know
Speaker 1: if a white man deserves that type of treat because
Speaker 1: I'm still you know, even even in I care, I
Speaker 1: can't help it. I care. So even like being a
Speaker 1: dom or being forced for whatever, I have to say
Speaker 1: it to somebody who it does something for you. And
Speaker 1: there's a part of me that be like, Okay, all
Speaker 1: your bitchiness is adding up where you're gonna put it,
Speaker 1: where're gonna put it? Because I just I don't like
Speaker 1: being mean to people for no reason, Like I could
Speaker 1: be sarcastic and all this other ship, but like being
Speaker 1: a bit for no reason that people is lame as fuck.
Speaker 1: But like sometimes I have an urge and I don't
Speaker 1: want to care what other people think, and I need
Speaker 1: a place to put it, Like you know what I'm
Speaker 1: saying and so dumping it off of somebody and they're
Speaker 1: getting off on it because I'm talking to them like
Speaker 1: that that feels good and I ain't heard nobody sucking
Speaker 1: feelings like it sounds like a good fucking day like
Speaker 1: and then they'd be rubbing feet like they take it
Speaker 1: off my shoes and rubbing my feet at the event,
Speaker 1: like I would never do live sex are I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna lie in Atlanta. I want to come back. But
Speaker 1: you know when and told me it was one of
Speaker 1: the best experiences the performers that you have, and it's
Speaker 1: just really upscale. And I do the fed dinners. I've
Speaker 1: invited people to New York. They just had one is
Speaker 1: well and a. But the way that she explained this
Speaker 1: art exhibit, she was like, first off, your mind is nuts.
Speaker 1: The way you what is it? I don't know what
Speaker 1: it is. So basically you you dressed like it's a
Speaker 1: black typing. So this past one that we had was
Speaker 1: Harlem Nights theme, So I mean we had the old
Speaker 1: school rolls roy Southside. We had the large letters like
Speaker 1: it's open bar. So I'm teaching people like if pussy
Speaker 1: in the room, it should be an expensive event. That's
Speaker 1: what it is, like, we don't you like yeah right.
Speaker 1: So also it's a great event for beginners that are
Speaker 1: trying to get into kink or just intimacy and different
Speaker 1: things like that, so you don't have to worry about
Speaker 1: taking off your clothes. It's not a play party. But
Speaker 1: we hire people that could headline their own show, like
Speaker 1: so the last one we had Sir marvelz Um Pure
Speaker 1: Intimacy Dash who does the erotic massages, yes, amongst guy
Speaker 1: like and they're all performing at once. So you're literally
Speaker 1: walking around the event and it's always mass great optional
Speaker 1: if you want to, no matter what theme it is.
Speaker 1: You're walking around event and you're watching these people have
Speaker 1: sex and like do different demonstrations and the music is
Speaker 1: up like it's pouring and things like that on the wall.
Speaker 1: You're walking around like in your tugs with your partner,
Speaker 1: and now y'all can like talk about like damn, I
Speaker 1: like looking at that, So like a if you if
Speaker 1: you weren't you know what I'm saying, nasties, fuck, you
Speaker 1: would go with your partner. But now it's like it's
Speaker 1: totally safe because you were in a Tuxyo, gotta worry
Speaker 1: about getting well, no, I mean just because I'm nasty,
Speaker 1: it doesn't mean I like, I don't want your face.
Speaker 1: I don't even want you don't that stuffs. For that reason,
Speaker 1: sometimes I get really overwhelmed, um with a lot of
Speaker 1: people there. And I'm a person that like threesomes and
Speaker 1: all kind of nasty ship, but being in a space
Speaker 1: of those people sometimes makes me apprehensive. So yeah, I
Speaker 1: think I'm massively roped off. So it's roped off. So
Speaker 1: like you, you don't have to worry about anything yet
Speaker 1: it isn't. It's just like art show, except they're doing
Speaker 1: all kind of crazy and it's so into it. What's
Speaker 1: the craziest thing you've seen it on your shows that
Speaker 1: I want to see? So dash um for pure intimacy.
Speaker 1: She's the woman who did my erotic massage that ends
Speaker 1: with like a happy ending. So she did a new
Speaker 1: room massage with someone Sky and someone Sky blew up
Speaker 1: to like top one percent over covid on um only
Speaker 1: fans and like she's so fucking gorgeous and just sexy
Speaker 1: and you know what I mean. And so they put
Speaker 1: their acts together and she massaged her and they was
Speaker 1: eating each other pussy and just it was so central,
Speaker 1: like I'm just I'm yes, absolutely so and if if
Speaker 1: y'all listen and make sure you join my Patreon. We
Speaker 1: did a we did a documentary on it forty five
Speaker 1: minutes and so like there were different interviews from the
Speaker 1: performers and just we rented this We rented this mansion
Speaker 1: for the day before UM, and we had a topless
Speaker 1: pool party, so that was like private UM and things
Speaker 1: like oh look, I love a good thing. Yes, might
Speaker 1: as well go ahead and put us out there now. Three,
Speaker 1: it will be in Atlanta again. This yere right. All
Speaker 1: the moves are sending me right to Atlanta. So um.
Speaker 1: This past year was in Houston. We did Atlanta before,
Speaker 1: but we're gonna have to bring it back. So I
Speaker 1: need a big enough space because now I've been talking
Speaker 1: about it everywhere and people like, oh, yeah, it's gonna
Speaker 1: be big cigar roller there figure out a new like
Speaker 1: he's a he's a cigar, Like he has the suit,
Speaker 1: like the father, like the host that when do you
Speaker 1: ever get a chance to go to I like that?
Speaker 1: It's like I do because you don't really give a
Speaker 1: horror and I don't gonna hold you, and I'll be
Speaker 1: confused when I hop on that fashion. No, but i'd
Speaker 1: be like, where the fun is somebody wearing a sequeen gown?
Speaker 1: Where the funk? But but now big birthday? Then you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. I'm lookings on a random Tuesday
Speaker 1: whenever we're doing so many more events that are like
Speaker 1: luxury and nasty, like I just feel like it doesn't
Speaker 1: have to be a lot like it doesn't. That's that's
Speaker 1: why they too much, because it's well, you leave one, Damn.
Speaker 1: I would have taken you to when he was working
Speaker 1: this weekend, next next time, next time he was working.
Speaker 1: I'm putting all right now yeah, oh no, I'm not.
Speaker 1: I take everyone on field trips to sex souns when
Speaker 1: they come to New York. Not the followers. I know
Speaker 1: you're all gonna be like black people the way. Oh
Speaker 1: there's an all black one. Yes, I'll take you there.
Speaker 1: It's great. Shout out to So this happens every week.
Speaker 1: Sorry I'm not here. We go again. Well, I did
Speaker 1: want to before we gonna start a horrible decision this week.
Speaker 1: I want to give a trigger warning UM for anyone
Speaker 1: who has experienced any sort of sexual assault UM, only
Speaker 1: because the horrible decision this week specifically UM goes against
Speaker 1: and we have to have this conversation because horrible decisions.
Speaker 1: Over the last six years. We talked about no kink
Speaker 1: shaming UM. We talked about sexual liberation, we talked about
Speaker 1: UM really owning the things that you like, and unfortunately
Speaker 1: a lot of people associate kink and things with fetish
Speaker 1: and things in the bedroom, like, well, something bad had
Speaker 1: to happen to you for you to like it. UM.
Speaker 1: And I've always sell this couch and was like, the
Speaker 1: things that I like have nothing to do with assault.
Speaker 1: I do the things I want to do because I
Speaker 1: want to do them, UM. And I don't think we've
Speaker 1: had the opportunity to acknowledge that there are some people
Speaker 1: that have uh an affinity for certain kinks and fetishes
Speaker 1: that are closely attached to sexual assault or traumas or
Speaker 1: things from their past. UM. And when I knew you
Speaker 1: were coming to New York, this was a topic that
Speaker 1: you were willing to open up about because it's something
Speaker 1: that you're dealing with in therapy. And I wanted to
Speaker 1: kind of go through your three kinks and how you
Speaker 1: found the connection to them with your trauma. Now you
Speaker 1: kind of work through it without being triggered, um, if
Speaker 1: you mind. Um. And the first one only because we
Speaker 1: talked about it already, thank you, thank you. I've been
Speaker 1: trying to girl, I'll be trying and then you know,
Speaker 1: I say that a word every other sentence and to
Speaker 1: be word. But what elver um? So the first one
Speaker 1: is actually and we haven't really got it into it,
Speaker 1: but you enjoy joining couples, I do. I have a
Speaker 1: thing for couples, so unicorn style. Also, how do you
Speaker 1: approach couples. Let's get into a maybe your first time
Speaker 1: joining a couple, and how you approach a couple, like
Speaker 1: I want both of you for me. It's always started
Speaker 1: with the woman, so um. But more than anything, I'm
Speaker 1: attracted to love and real love. I can tell when
Speaker 1: I'm around somebody and you can. And I'm not talking
Speaker 1: about like, oh, y'all always getting along. I'm talking about
Speaker 1: real love, which means that I know that. Like if
Speaker 1: I feel like if the husband was to try to
Speaker 1: hit on me in a way that made me feel
Speaker 1: like your wife would be uncomfortable with this, I'm totally
Speaker 1: turned off. Like I don't like things like that. I
Speaker 1: don't like no shady ship. The point is that It's
Speaker 1: already controversial as fuck, and I'm not about to feed
Speaker 1: into that because it's making it harder for me to
Speaker 1: get it. Don't love are very sexy? Because my thing
Speaker 1: is when you feel like I don't know to like,
Speaker 1: I think you look at how attractive with someone is first, right,
Speaker 1: and then their dynamic is truly what makes you want
Speaker 1: to suck him, you know what I mean, Like beyond
Speaker 1: the sex club thing. Of course there's something with just vanity,
Speaker 1: but like, yeah, you want to join in on that ship.
Speaker 1: It's just like friends. If I'm out or something and
Speaker 1: I see a group of friends having a good time,
Speaker 1: I feel that energy. So I think for sure couples
Speaker 1: don't realize what they put off, like when dudes are
Speaker 1: the ones that ask for it, you can always tell,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, when woman is uncomfortable, like
Speaker 1: I'm not doing that. First of all, I'm really not
Speaker 1: trying to put down another woman or anything like that.
Speaker 1: But also I'm not trying to come in here to
Speaker 1: funk up anything. I'm also looking for a certain void
Speaker 1: to be filled, right, which is what I realized. Watching
Speaker 1: a healthy parenting and loving situation is something that I
Speaker 1: realized I want to believe. Man, I'm a hopeless romantic
Speaker 1: or at least a hopeful one, and so watching other
Speaker 1: people in love, I can admit like where I haven't
Speaker 1: been great at it, and I can also admit that
Speaker 1: I haven't seen a lot of great examples. But when
Speaker 1: somebody it's almost like with yourself, when when you're more
Speaker 1: whole and things like that, you have more to give
Speaker 1: other people. And I feel like when couples are whole together,
Speaker 1: despite like their issues, they're able to offer me something
Speaker 1: which is just caring for me as a normal fucking
Speaker 1: person and and not making me feel crazy because I'm
Speaker 1: attracted the boat, for y'all, and that comes from which
Speaker 1: trauma responds. I feel like it's definitely the wanting to
Speaker 1: feel one included by a woman, right um. I feel
Speaker 1: like growing up, there's a one of the hard truths
Speaker 1: about like growing up with a parent molesting you is
Speaker 1: that there becomes almost like a rift between you and
Speaker 1: your mom because now she's kind of diminishing you so
Speaker 1: that way because her husband is attracted. So I become
Speaker 1: the other woman in my own home. Growing up, Like,
Speaker 1: there were certain times I could definitely feel that my
Speaker 1: fire was kind of being put out because don't wear
Speaker 1: this and don't wear that. But I would go to
Speaker 1: other people's homes and they can. I'm like, you can
Speaker 1: wear that at at your house. But I realized I'm
Speaker 1: growing up on a house where you know, if your
Speaker 1: dad is molesting you, then it's oh, don't put this on,
Speaker 1: instead of us dealing with it properly, it's wild, don't
Speaker 1: put this on right and so or either you're fast
Speaker 1: about everything when when or a certain age, liking the
Speaker 1: opposite sex or liking anybody isn't normal right. So being
Speaker 1: around a couple and them not making me feel like
Speaker 1: a whore or making me feel like, oh you like
Speaker 1: my hood, you know what I'm saying, and not making
Speaker 1: me feel like that, it makes me feel included. It
Speaker 1: makes me feel included with another woman. It makes me
Speaker 1: want to rebuild the trust that I have with women,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. Um. It also gives me
Speaker 1: hope with men and they stay there, like when they're
Speaker 1: honest with their wives and like no, like I love
Speaker 1: when I can talk to a man about why he
Speaker 1: loves his wife and we have sex off of that,
Speaker 1: like and him thinking like, I love how you show
Speaker 1: up for her and vice versa, and then being happy
Speaker 1: for each other, like a level of compulsion um. The
Speaker 1: best the best couple of that updated thus far. Unfortunately
Speaker 1: we're not together anymore, but I have nothing but great
Speaker 1: things to say about them, and like what they had.
Speaker 1: They were really good with compulsion um and just being
Speaker 1: happy for each other getting something else, like your partner
Speaker 1: can't give you everything, and they always are going to
Speaker 1: get it from their friendships or whatever or whatever. But
Speaker 1: we were getting it in this dating way, and I
Speaker 1: saw them even come into a new stage of their
Speaker 1: relationship together. There were things that she've been trying to
Speaker 1: explain to him for years that when I explained and
Speaker 1: hearing a new voice in a different perspective, that he
Speaker 1: was like, I gotta level up on it. You're right,
Speaker 1: Like you know what I mean, Like it's the thing everything.
Speaker 1: Don't always ask compatibly. I need more compatibility, Like I
Speaker 1: like to travel and I want I want to be
Speaker 1: able to live my life like kind of like not
Speaker 1: mirrored with someone else's, but we have to be able
Speaker 1: to do the same things. And would you want to
Speaker 1: be in a throuble um like what you mean as
Speaker 1: my only relationship? Yeah, it depends that means like I
Speaker 1: would I would be open to that. I would be
Speaker 1: open to it. But as a positible, I can't never
Speaker 1: say that everything is always off the table. But it's
Speaker 1: always about like me getting the things I need. But
Speaker 1: I was really good there, like for a little bit,
Speaker 1: like I was getting you know, three people. But it's
Speaker 1: super it's super intimate, and it makes you discuss the
Speaker 1: things that I really want to say. So like one
Speaker 1: of my favorite things, like with the couple is like
Speaker 1: laying back between one of their legs why the other
Speaker 1: one is like you know, doing whatever, and me thanking
Speaker 1: them like thank you so much for letting her me
Speaker 1: like this, like thank you so much, and like's are
Speaker 1: kissing me? You know what I'm saying, And like even
Speaker 1: just asking asking him like what that pussy feel like
Speaker 1: and like you know what I mean, and them not
Speaker 1: having the whole back you know what I mean. It's
Speaker 1: almost like a comfort of even masturbating in front of
Speaker 1: your part you know how awkward that is, Like even
Speaker 1: if you are okay with it, it's still awkward. But
Speaker 1: doing that and having the permission of your partner to
Speaker 1: enjoy yourself, um and requiring you to enjoy yourself, you know,
Speaker 1: like it's a whole another level of intimacy, but it
Speaker 1: does something for me. It's like it feels like even
Speaker 1: the way that they coddle and not just that, but
Speaker 1: almost all couples that I'm attracted to the way they
Speaker 1: coddle me and help me and to grow. You know,
Speaker 1: they're proud of me. They want to see what I'm
Speaker 1: doing because they already got their own life, they already
Speaker 1: love each other, they already got their own money ship
Speaker 1: going on. So it's like we're here for you. We're
Speaker 1: proud of you, like what you're doing by yourself. Is
Speaker 1: there a time frame of a relationship people have been
Speaker 1: in that you've noticed is like more stable for wanting
Speaker 1: to join in. I've only funked with people that are
Speaker 1: probably together, Like yeah, yeah, so that's a good time.
Speaker 1: I know. I like people that are in love and comfortable.
Speaker 1: There's a lot of there's a lot of couples in
Speaker 1: the space. I know, even when we went to hedonism,
Speaker 1: people like, yeah, we've been here seventeen times. Just like
Speaker 1: like even even in the sex space, like the couples
Speaker 1: are normally they've been together for a while, like it's
Speaker 1: you could tell I'm the only new around. Um. You
Speaker 1: know you talked about joining in on couples. You also
Speaker 1: have an affinity for MMF threesomes, and I've part taken
Speaker 1: in it, love it. Don't really get to do it
Speaker 1: as much as I absolutely will run partner wasn't interested
Speaker 1: in it. But I wanted to know in what way
Speaker 1: does your fantasy of MMF threesomes and partaking MMF threesomes
Speaker 1: come from trauma? So the first time that and I've
Speaker 1: always said I've never had a male male female threesome. UM.
Speaker 1: And I say that because if it's not consensual, then
Speaker 1: that's not what it is. What it is is you've
Speaker 1: been raped. Um, something happened in considerent and I'm not
Speaker 1: going to call that sex, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: And so, UM, in the instance that that happened one,
Speaker 1: you know, that was difficult because I was trying not
Speaker 1: to blame myself, you know, one, because I had snuck
Speaker 1: out the house to you know, in high school, snuck
Speaker 1: out out. So it's like we're worried about I'm worried
Speaker 1: about getting in trouble to the point that I'm not
Speaker 1: speaking up about my safety, right um, and just being young,
Speaker 1: no having a proper guidance, you know, Um, like what
Speaker 1: do I do? And you just you know, you bury
Speaker 1: this ship. You're like, well, this ain't what I wanted.
Speaker 1: But what I did realize is that in my mind
Speaker 1: it was like, damn if this had happened a different way,
Speaker 1: I'm not totally against this, and that made me feel
Speaker 1: disgusting because I was. I did not like the situation,
Speaker 1: you know, and then hearing men always say that something
Speaker 1: is a train, bitch my situation? What's right? You know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. So here somebody call your situation a
Speaker 1: train when it's like I didn't even want this, like
Speaker 1: it hurts, and so that hurt even And like I said,
Speaker 1: I'm a hopeful romantic. I have a desire to see
Speaker 1: more than one man care about my safety to say
Speaker 1: that this is how you want it. Okay, we're gonna
Speaker 1: make sure you do this safely. I just as safely.
Speaker 1: It's like I'm about to walk into your car like
Speaker 1: it's dark outside. I want to believe that you care
Speaker 1: more about my consent. I want to believe that you
Speaker 1: care enough about me that you can be gentle with
Speaker 1: this pussy even though I want to experience it in
Speaker 1: a different way that you will be like as long
Speaker 1: as you're safe, like that matters more. I have to
Speaker 1: believe that that exists, you know, so like and I
Speaker 1: know it, and I'm I'm I'm very serious about it
Speaker 1: having because I don't want to be triggered, right, so
Speaker 1: it can't happen. And people like, why does it have
Speaker 1: to be intimate? Because I've had it the other way
Speaker 1: and that's not that that wasn't what I wanted, but
Speaker 1: I realized, like there there is nothing different than feeling
Speaker 1: safe around it. Man, My fantasy is always like that
Speaker 1: I've had is always if I had a boyfriend, And
Speaker 1: I wonder if it is because I had the same situation,
Speaker 1: like I lost my Virginitia right, and I think that
Speaker 1: I don't even count him as a guy. I call,
Speaker 1: like if anyone's ever listening to the show and think
Speaker 1: that the person I'm running into sometimes at the club
Speaker 1: with God, No, he's the one, you know. I mean,
Speaker 1: technically we choose, but I think about that sometimes, like
Speaker 1: mm hmm, I wonder why I want it to be
Speaker 1: someone I'm in love with or a husband or a boyfriend.
Speaker 1: It must be something to do with safety, something about
Speaker 1: like a man his masculinity being bigger than talking about me,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean, which is are you safe?
Speaker 1: Like are you good? This is the way you wanted it?
Speaker 1: Are you sure you want it this way? Because it
Speaker 1: should be like that in other sexual scenarios, right, um,
Speaker 1: but also me having the boss to say, what if
Speaker 1: this feels good outside of the situation that I had,
Speaker 1: You know what I mean, I don't want to ask
Speaker 1: something totally out of my life because it went wrong,
Speaker 1: Like you don't never not drive again because you've got
Speaker 1: to crack what some people do. But you know what
Speaker 1: I mean, Like, I don't. I don't want to live
Speaker 1: a life like that, and I don't want to. I
Speaker 1: don't think that it's right that I gotta cut pleasure
Speaker 1: out of my life because you was a I mean,
Speaker 1: I think it's definitely important to talk. Like my mm
Speaker 1: F experience was so great that one guy made me
Speaker 1: squirt in and I was making all these noises and
Speaker 1: my guy was got mad at him, like is it
Speaker 1: happing hard? What are you doing? And I don't know,
Speaker 1: it's good, It's good he could keep doing. But we
Speaker 1: we checked in with each other. Was also how in
Speaker 1: edibles and had to be thrown into an ice bath.
Speaker 1: We ain't gonna talk about that, but it was a
Speaker 1: really good experience and we were able to talk about
Speaker 1: it even the next day, Like we all wouldn't grab
Speaker 1: breakfast and nothing was weird and it was just like
Speaker 1: I got to the front seat, nigga set on the back.
Speaker 1: That was great, but like it worked out well. And
Speaker 1: I think that that's the thing too, to be able
Speaker 1: to talk about it before, to consent before, to know
Speaker 1: who you're bringing in, for the man to trust the
Speaker 1: person they're also bringing in is very important. And then
Speaker 1: to still check in after it's you know, during he
Speaker 1: did check in during he threw me in the bath
Speaker 1: after because I couldn't die because the nigga was still
Speaker 1: playing football. He said, oh no, bitch, we're not laying
Speaker 1: on TMZ. But I think that's very word. And before
Speaker 1: we get out of here, there was one more. We're
Speaker 1: not gonna get to home no this week. But you
Speaker 1: talked about the difference between needing words of affirmation but
Speaker 1: also degradation and humiliation, and wanted to know those needs
Speaker 1: for those types of verbal um words. I guess, look
Speaker 1: at me trying to think of right and what's the
Speaker 1: difference with the two needing words of affirmation and then
Speaker 1: the humiliation aspect um, So the words of affirmation. Um,
Speaker 1: if I'm being honest, I feel like now that I'm
Speaker 1: a parent, I'm very aware, that overly aware some of
Speaker 1: the things and not some, but a lot of the
Speaker 1: ways that things were handled, you know, specific I would
Speaker 1: say probably specifically more like my mom. The way that
Speaker 1: she was talking to us was absolutely out of pocket.
Speaker 1: Like it and when you're talking about like, oh you
Speaker 1: didn't gentle parently, we're not talking about that. We're talking
Speaker 1: she called you a bit like everything under the sun.
Speaker 1: And you know what's crazy, she didn't even say bitch
Speaker 1: a lot, you know what I mean? But actually saying
Speaker 1: things that you know how men, you gotta be that
Speaker 1: you're saying something they don't even involve a curse word,
Speaker 1: but you're saying something to put me down. You're making
Speaker 1: you think less of myself when it has nothing to
Speaker 1: do with why you're mad, you know what I mean.
Speaker 1: And So what I've learned about trauma is that it's
Speaker 1: not just something happening bad. It's something happening bad while
Speaker 1: you're in a vulnerable moment, right, and then you heal
Speaker 1: over it, so it almost scabs up. And So what
Speaker 1: I found is that putting myself in another vulnerable moment
Speaker 1: and then adding good things in helps almost undo and
Speaker 1: unlock some of that trauma. So words of affirmation during sex,
Speaker 1: telling me that I'm more than fucking good enough while
Speaker 1: you're sucking me and stroking me and telling me how
Speaker 1: proud you are of me and you've come so fucking
Speaker 1: far and I just love you, and then spitting my mouth.
Speaker 1: You know, it's just from a work perspective, but I
Speaker 1: wanted me to be like you kill that motherfucking podcast,
Speaker 1: Like I'm so fucking proud of you, Like I knew
Speaker 1: you was gonna do that ship, Like I see you.
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, Like one's making me not shrink,
Speaker 1: You're making me acknowledge in the most vulnerable moment, my
Speaker 1: my my legs is sucking open, pussiest popping bring it back.
Speaker 1: So that that was that was good, That that was good.
Speaker 1: And and in those moments pouring something in. And so
Speaker 1: I even had to start doing it with myself, because
Speaker 1: you don't want to get attached with somebody too much
Speaker 1: so even while I masturbate, I've recorded things. I have
Speaker 1: this um this masturbation like playlist or whatever we're playlist, Yes,
Speaker 1: so like it's a whole track list like on my
Speaker 1: Patreon you could listen to it. When I was losing weight,
Speaker 1: like what I was telling myself and I was talking
Speaker 1: to myself. And so more than anything, I masturbate to
Speaker 1: my go like everything that's bumped that makes me like
Speaker 1: that was making me insecure, you know, um, and I
Speaker 1: found that it was making me stronger. Right, So there's
Speaker 1: just doing the opposite right intentionally. Um. And then and
Speaker 1: like during sex magic because like what it did, like
Speaker 1: you know, good Tinkerville. Uh, So there's that. And then
Speaker 1: also me being comfortable with people not liking me and
Speaker 1: sometimes somebody thinking on me if I'm asking for what
Speaker 1: I want, Like sometimes I feel like I care so
Speaker 1: much that it's like, bitch, what do you want? What
Speaker 1: do you like? I'm trying not to be rude to
Speaker 1: the point that it's like, come on, girl, like what's up?
Speaker 1: I want to get you what you need? Like and
Speaker 1: just me believing like I'm supposed to be here and
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, not feeling uncomfortable. I don't
Speaker 1: feel uncomfortable anymore because I know that what I'm asking
Speaker 1: for I'm not asking for anything unreasonable, whether it's in
Speaker 1: the work setting, relationship setting, or anything else. But when
Speaker 1: you feel like you're not worthy, you know what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: you're not comfortable with asking for things. So I feel
Speaker 1: like I just had to be better at practicing, so
Speaker 1: like hiring a submissive to like I said, clean my
Speaker 1: house and things like that, like I'm not talking to nice.
Speaker 1: And I also realized, yes, sometimes I have an urge
Speaker 1: to not be nice as fun and that's okay, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. It's a time place for everything.
Speaker 1: But that fear of like beings route like my mouth,
Speaker 1: it's hurt people, you know what I'm saying, and I
Speaker 1: I don't ever want to make nobody feel like I
Speaker 1: have felt, especially acting out of trauma. But I also
Speaker 1: realized some of the things that I desire finding a
Speaker 1: proper place to do them. So like, for example, if
Speaker 1: you bossy, go manage some ship, right, if you organize,
Speaker 1: like you know what I'm saying, use the thing that
Speaker 1: either gets out of hand or is annoying to you
Speaker 1: or whatever. And find a place to put it. And
Speaker 1: I'm gonna always work through my issues through sex. It's
Speaker 1: a but most of my issues started with sex, and
Speaker 1: so I use it as an avenue to correct things.
Speaker 1: But would your tip bey to to get us out
Speaker 1: of your What would your tip be to somebody who
Speaker 1: acknowledges that their kinks or fetishes are sent from trauma? Um?
Speaker 1: What tip would you give to make sure that those
Speaker 1: aren't triggered? Well, one, I'm proud of you. I'm proud
Speaker 1: of you for acknowledging that something that someone did to
Speaker 1: hurt you does bring you some sort of pleasure. It
Speaker 1: it does something for you, and you're decide you're deciding
Speaker 1: to not give up, but go look at it again
Speaker 1: and fix their fucking mess something that they did to you.
Speaker 1: So I'm pud out of you for that, for acknowledging
Speaker 1: and not trying to bury that ship because it comes
Speaker 1: back up and that's trickering. Um. If you're looking for control,
Speaker 1: there is none. The best control you have is just
Speaker 1: accepting yourself. Whatever has happened in the past, it's not
Speaker 1: because of you. It's not your fault, and I'm proud
Speaker 1: of you for fucking speaking up. And it's gonna be
Speaker 1: so much power that comes from that ship, so follow it.
Speaker 1: Like you're looking at me like this is me speaking
Speaker 1: of being honest, Like I'm on this podcast talking about
Speaker 1: stuff that I've never had to say allowed before. Man,
Speaker 1: Oh bitch, you ain't even crying. That's no maker. So
Speaker 1: do the fucking work and show up for yourself for
Speaker 1: nobody else, but simply because imagine what could happen if
Speaker 1: you tell your story, you do all the things that
Speaker 1: somebody's trying to take from you, you know, just imagine
Speaker 1: what happens. Like now real quick. I know y'all all
Speaker 1: love somebody now, so sad, please tell them what they
Speaker 1: spend their coins with you where they can listen to
Speaker 1: your podcasts where they probably don't pay. Godamn, you're about
Speaker 1: to take care of it for me because you did
Speaker 1: that talk, your ship talk since oh my goodness to
Speaker 1: let him know. Look here, y'all can find me um
Speaker 1: on Instagram at goodness sexual Dota centials. They didn't delete
Speaker 1: it me before, but sexual Dota centials pages right, Um
Speaker 1: not um not just another sex pod on Instagram maya
Speaker 1: bugsy m I A B g g Z y Um.
Speaker 1: You can click any of those links in my bio
Speaker 1: and the Sexual Essentials dot com is my website. Sign
Speaker 1: up for my Patreon. It's almost three hundred classes, workshop,
Speaker 1: hands on demonstrations, documented interviews, a whole bunch of puss
Speaker 1: magic on here. Thank you for being vulnerable with us.
Speaker 1: By the way, I know it's not easy to like
Speaker 1: tell stories, and then it's just like sometimes we can
Speaker 1: tell it in the moment, and then the date comes out,
Speaker 1: You're like, oh my god, what are people gonna say?
Speaker 1: It's just like a lot and then you almost got
Speaker 1: to relive it again. So I appreciate it absolutely. I
Speaker 1: appreciate you all. Hell I reached out with years ago
Speaker 1: like we should do, and then of course it made
Speaker 1: sense we were able to record on periods because it
Speaker 1: was virtual. It was virtual. But I'm just glad that
Speaker 1: you made your way up here and finally got to
Speaker 1: come on too. Horribles sucking and what a time like
Speaker 1: It's just if you ignore what has happened to you,
Speaker 1: if you ignore what you really want to talk about,
Speaker 1: You're gonna push stuff that you really want away from you.
Speaker 1: I've been trying to get on the show for helens
Speaker 1: like these thous we booked him motherucking busy, Like you
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, You want to be booked on
Speaker 1: your podcast. Things could be true, but what the rewards,
Speaker 1: The rewards that come from doing what you should have
Speaker 1: been doing. This is where space was made for me
Speaker 1: and I was available to sit in it. So it's like,
Speaker 1: I really hope that y'all just do the work. Um
Speaker 1: talk to somebody, um getting some other therapy because therapy.
Speaker 1: By the way, guys, we are also on Patreon, so
Speaker 1: if you have not yet, please go over to our
Speaker 1: patreon is Patreon dot com backslash Horrible Decisions. You missed
Speaker 1: solo episodes, Patreon is right gonna get them. We do
Speaker 1: our most up to date episodes on Patreon. A lot
Speaker 1: of the times we're in studio, we want to have
Speaker 1: guests and we want to have it on great video,
Speaker 1: but we'll be at home and we'll be feeling to
Speaker 1: on the Patreon, So going over at patreon dot com
Speaker 1: backslash Horrible Decisions, y'all. Until next time. This has been
Speaker 1: yet another episode of Horrid Blair. This is y'all. Thank
Speaker 1: you