WEBVTT - Bailey’s Turn to Tell 0:00:01.800 --> 0:00:03.760 Hey, everyone, Welcome back to bed your Happy Hour. I'm 0:00:03.840 --> 0:00:06.720 Joe and I'm Serena and we are here today with Bailey. 0:00:06.800 --> 0:00:10.160 Bailey Welcome. We're so excited to have you. Our listeners 0:00:10.240 --> 0:00:11.320 really want to hear from you. 0:00:11.960 --> 0:00:15.320 How you doing, Hi, guys, I'm so excited to be here. 0:00:15.440 --> 0:00:16.200 I mean, I'm good. 0:00:16.239 --> 0:00:18.840 I just got back from Europe and I'm honestly just 0:00:18.840 --> 0:00:20.400 like getting back into the swing of things. 0:00:20.400 --> 0:00:21.920 So no complaints over here. 0:00:22.720 --> 0:00:27.040 Nice. Nice, Okay, So you were on Grant season pretty quickly, 0:00:27.080 --> 0:00:28.840 but you stood out to us because we talked about 0:00:28.880 --> 0:00:32.480 you a lot, and I remember thinking like, I don't 0:00:32.479 --> 0:00:33.960 know if you're going to end up with Grant. I 0:00:33.960 --> 0:00:35.640 couldn't really get a feel for whoever was going to 0:00:35.720 --> 0:00:37.839 end up with Grant, but I was like, you are 0:00:38.120 --> 0:00:41.440 you are definitely someone that I think will be in Paradise. 0:00:41.159 --> 0:00:44.959 And were you surprised when they asked you? 0:00:45.040 --> 0:00:48.839 Honestly, I feel like after coming off of Paradise, it 0:00:48.880 --> 0:00:51.120 makes sense, like I kind of feel like, you know, 0:00:51.320 --> 0:00:54.240 it was all meant to happen for a reason. I 0:00:54.280 --> 0:00:56.800 think everyone was like a little up in the air about, 0:00:56.880 --> 0:00:58.880 you know, if they were going on Paradise. What was happening. 0:00:58.920 --> 0:01:00.680 I think we all kind of found out pretty late, 0:01:01.840 --> 0:01:03.800 but I was really happy. Honestly, when they asked me, 0:01:03.840 --> 0:01:06.200 I feel like it would have definitely like it was 0:01:06.280 --> 0:01:07.040 more my speed. 0:01:07.120 --> 0:01:09.800 I definitely feel like I got more time. 0:01:09.600 --> 0:01:12.959 To just like be myself and it was still stressful, 0:01:13.040 --> 0:01:14.440 but I still like. 0:01:14.440 --> 0:01:15.839 Really enjoyed my experience. 0:01:15.959 --> 0:01:18.640 So yeah, I feel like, you know, everything happens for 0:01:18.680 --> 0:01:21.160 a reason, and my time on Grant season was short. 0:01:21.560 --> 0:01:23.480 I literally got sent home on like week three, but 0:01:24.040 --> 0:01:25.639 you know, it all was a part of a bigger 0:01:25.680 --> 0:01:27.800 plan for me to go to Paradise, So I think 0:01:27.840 --> 0:01:28.600 that's really awesome. 0:01:29.080 --> 0:01:32.040 Did you watch the show before going on Grant season? 0:01:33.120 --> 0:01:34.400 Honestly, like not really. 0:01:34.480 --> 0:01:37.080 I think the last time I watched was Hannah season 0:01:37.240 --> 0:01:40.480 because we are friends and so that's really the last 0:01:40.520 --> 0:01:41.400 time I watched. 0:01:41.200 --> 0:01:43.360 Like a full season like till the end. 0:01:44.640 --> 0:01:45.640 Gana g. 0:01:45.920 --> 0:01:48.600 Yeah, that's the last time I've like really watched a season, 0:01:50.080 --> 0:01:53.120 And even going into it, I didn't even watch, Like 0:01:53.160 --> 0:01:55.560 I think I watched the finale of Joey's season and 0:01:55.600 --> 0:01:58.720 I watched when Grant got sent home, and that was 0:01:58.800 --> 0:01:59.160 kind of. 0:01:59.120 --> 0:02:01.560 Just like I was like, I think I've got like 0:02:01.600 --> 0:02:02.240 a good fix. 0:02:02.320 --> 0:02:04.080 Like when I was in a sorority, we used to 0:02:04.080 --> 0:02:06.480 like do Bachelor Mondays and watch them all together. But 0:02:06.960 --> 0:02:09.079 that was like when Hannah was on. So that's really 0:02:09.120 --> 0:02:10.320 the last season that I watched. 0:02:10.720 --> 0:02:11.960 Had you seen Paradise before? 0:02:13.000 --> 0:02:15.520 No, I actually had not seen Paradise, So when she 0:02:15.600 --> 0:02:18.800 was on Paradise, I like only very briefly watched years ago, 0:02:18.880 --> 0:02:21.239 and then before I think I watched some. I watched 0:02:21.280 --> 0:02:23.880 the first three episodes of season eight, and then I 0:02:23.960 --> 0:02:27.840 realized that, like whatever I was thinking of outfits is 0:02:27.840 --> 0:02:29.600 going to be totally different. So I was just like, 0:02:29.680 --> 0:02:31.960 I really watched it so I could plan my outfits, 0:02:32.639 --> 0:02:34.120 and I was like, it's going to be a totally 0:02:34.120 --> 0:02:37.240 different season. So whatever really like happens on this Paradise 0:02:37.360 --> 0:02:39.800 isn't really gonna like help me. So I was like, 0:02:39.840 --> 0:02:41.359 I kind of just need to like shut it off. 0:02:41.600 --> 0:02:43.800 It's also the last of episodes, honestly. 0:02:43.960 --> 0:02:48.960 Yeah, going into going into Paradise, who are your friends 0:02:49.040 --> 0:02:52.680 from Grant season and what guys are you interested in 0:02:52.760 --> 0:02:54.440 meeting if any? 0:02:54.800 --> 0:02:58.919 So going into Paradise, Zoe and I were really good 0:02:58.919 --> 0:03:01.440 friends from Grant season, and Alicia and I were good 0:03:01.440 --> 0:03:04.520 friends from Grant season, Prisa and I share a best friend, 0:03:04.560 --> 0:03:06.240 so I kind of knew all the girls from my 0:03:06.320 --> 0:03:08.240 season that were going. I'm friends with Ali Joe, I 0:03:08.280 --> 0:03:10.560 was friends with Alex. Like Alex and I weren't as 0:03:10.600 --> 0:03:13.000 close on Grant Season, but we definitely like built our 0:03:13.040 --> 0:03:15.800 friendship on Paradise, which was really nice because we were roommates. 0:03:16.800 --> 0:03:19.360 So I was really happy to like have Zoe there 0:03:19.400 --> 0:03:21.920 with me, especially week one. Lexi and I have like 0:03:21.960 --> 0:03:23.560 followed each other, and I just like knew I was 0:03:23.560 --> 0:03:25.720 gonna love her. I feel like I had a good 0:03:25.880 --> 0:03:28.720 idea of who was going on Paradise. I don't think 0:03:28.760 --> 0:03:30.799 people knew that I was going on Paradise, which is 0:03:30.840 --> 0:03:33.160 also like kind of nice because I feel like people 0:03:33.160 --> 0:03:35.240 didn't really have time to like do research on me. 0:03:36.320 --> 0:03:37.960 Maybe they would have not liked but they saw on 0:03:38.040 --> 0:03:41.880 Grant Season. I don't know, they could be anti selfie takers. 0:03:42.000 --> 0:03:44.480 I feel like you just never really know these days. 0:03:45.800 --> 0:03:47.800 But yeah, I think I kind of knew the guys, 0:03:48.000 --> 0:03:51.400 but really, I haven't had enough time in like Bachelor 0:03:51.520 --> 0:03:53.760 Nation world to get to like know everyone. 0:03:54.120 --> 0:03:54.480 I like. 0:03:54.720 --> 0:03:57.000 Very briefly met a few of the guys from Gen 0:03:57.160 --> 0:04:00.560 season for maybe thirty seconds at the time. Tell all, 0:04:00.720 --> 0:04:05.000 So I really went into it like having no preconceived 0:04:05.120 --> 0:04:08.720 notions about anybody, and really I didn't have anyone. 0:04:08.400 --> 0:04:10.480 I was like excited to meet, per se. 0:04:10.520 --> 0:04:12.240 I had like a list of people that I just 0:04:12.280 --> 0:04:14.800 you know, glanced at their pages and I was like, yeah, 0:04:14.840 --> 0:04:16.719 like I think we might vibe. 0:04:16.720 --> 0:04:17.880 I feel like they seem cool. 0:04:18.279 --> 0:04:21.400 But I really didn't know anyone, which I feel like 0:04:21.520 --> 0:04:24.440 is good because I'm a really big personality person. So 0:04:24.480 --> 0:04:26.560 I think it just allowed me to like feel really 0:04:26.680 --> 0:04:28.880 natural in the moment and not be like I hate 0:04:28.880 --> 0:04:30.080 this person, you know. 0:04:30.160 --> 0:04:32.400 I was just kind of like being honestly. 0:04:33.279 --> 0:04:35.600 We see you get down there and you kind of 0:04:35.920 --> 0:04:42.080 immediately enter this soft love triangle with Jeremy and Kyle. 0:04:42.520 --> 0:04:45.479 Tell us about those two connections and your first impressions 0:04:45.480 --> 0:04:46.360 of these guys. 0:04:47.000 --> 0:04:48.760 Yeah, I feel like I went on the beach and 0:04:48.839 --> 0:04:51.320 I was just honestly like, oh, I hope someone's like 0:04:51.400 --> 0:04:53.280 kind of interested in me. I was just like, oh, 0:04:53.279 --> 0:04:56.560 I hope somebody's like feeling me, vibing with me, And 0:04:56.600 --> 0:04:58.120 I feel like it was a really good group of 0:04:58.160 --> 0:05:01.799 guys on day one. Two had like no idea Kyle 0:05:01.880 --> 0:05:03.599 was going to be there, so he was a surprised. 0:05:03.760 --> 0:05:05.520 I knew that Jeremy was going to be there, but 0:05:05.600 --> 0:05:08.279 we like had only briefly met, like for five seconds 0:05:08.279 --> 0:05:11.480 one time, and I don't even really remember us meeting 0:05:11.480 --> 0:05:13.360 each other, honestly, I just know we were in the 0:05:13.400 --> 0:05:14.000 same place. 0:05:15.160 --> 0:05:17.440 So I feel like, you know, I think they both. 0:05:17.240 --> 0:05:20.280 Surprised me because I wasn't expecting to like talk to 0:05:20.320 --> 0:05:22.680 either of them or have conversations with either of them. 0:05:23.000 --> 0:05:25.440 And I feel like when I was having conversations with 0:05:25.480 --> 0:05:27.960 every single person that day, I was solely going off 0:05:28.000 --> 0:05:30.760 of like personality, and I think both their personalities in 0:05:30.760 --> 0:05:34.479 different ways like stood out to me. And yeah, I've 0:05:34.520 --> 0:05:37.400 never been in a soft love triangle, so that was 0:05:37.440 --> 0:05:40.719 definitely very nerve wracking, and you know, I was feeling 0:05:40.920 --> 0:05:43.520 really nervous with my feelings. Like week one, I was 0:05:43.600 --> 0:05:47.040 just like so overwhelmed because you, I mean, you guys 0:05:47.080 --> 0:05:49.640 know like you have to make such tough decisions in Paradise, 0:05:49.680 --> 0:05:53.480 and it's like because you focused on certain people, if 0:05:54.240 --> 0:05:56.800 you know you don't choose them, their journey is like 0:05:56.880 --> 0:05:59.080 cut short. And so many people went home week one, 0:05:59.160 --> 0:06:01.000 so it was like really nerve wracking, and you don't 0:06:01.000 --> 0:06:03.520 want to make like the wrong decision with anything, and 0:06:03.640 --> 0:06:06.960 so yeah, it was definitely a weird feeling for me 0:06:07.080 --> 0:06:09.839 because I'm very much just like with you know, I'm 0:06:09.880 --> 0:06:12.120 like used to just like being locked in on one person. 0:06:12.279 --> 0:06:14.880 So but I also wanted to come into Paradise just 0:06:14.920 --> 0:06:18.200 really you know, making the most of this experience, taking 0:06:18.200 --> 0:06:19.960 time to really get to know everyone. I didn't want 0:06:19.960 --> 0:06:23.120 to leave with like any regrets. So yeah, there was 0:06:23.160 --> 0:06:23.760 a lot going on. 0:06:24.600 --> 0:06:27.599 Okay, so you you end up choosing Jeremy, which seems 0:06:27.600 --> 0:06:30.599 like it's the correct decision for you and for him. 0:06:31.600 --> 0:06:37.719 What is your relationship like after you pick him? Prior 0:06:38.640 --> 0:06:42.760 to Susie coming onto the show? Where do you guys, Like, 0:06:43.000 --> 0:06:46.080 what would you consider your relationship status at that point? 0:06:46.880 --> 0:06:49.440 Yeah, I mean I feel like we were pretty like 0:06:50.160 --> 0:06:51.080 in a really good place. 0:06:51.120 --> 0:06:52.760 Like I feel like I felt in a really good 0:06:52.800 --> 0:06:53.480 place with us. 0:06:54.160 --> 0:06:56.039 I feel like That's also why I was really calm 0:06:56.080 --> 0:06:59.040 when Susie did come in, and even when they went 0:06:59.080 --> 0:07:00.680 on their date, I was just like, I mean, I'm 0:07:00.680 --> 0:07:03.560 in a good place, Like I am confident in this 0:07:03.800 --> 0:07:06.280 the decision that I made. I still think that, you know, 0:07:06.600 --> 0:07:09.120 I know that Jeremy was the correct decision for me 0:07:09.200 --> 0:07:11.400 at the time, and so I was like, yeah, this 0:07:11.560 --> 0:07:13.680 is you know this, I'm making this decision like with 0:07:13.720 --> 0:07:16.239 a lot of confidence behind it, and kind of whatever 0:07:16.240 --> 0:07:18.200 happens going into week two, like that's just kind of 0:07:18.240 --> 0:07:20.760 what happens. Like, I feel like it was a weird 0:07:20.760 --> 0:07:23.480 feeling though, because it did seem like everyone was really 0:07:23.560 --> 0:07:27.040 locking in after week one and that's like so nerve wrecking, 0:07:27.320 --> 0:07:29.840 and honestly, I don't even really remember us ever having 0:07:29.920 --> 0:07:32.720 conversations about other people coming in. I feel like we 0:07:32.720 --> 0:07:34.960 were just really taking all of our time to really 0:07:34.960 --> 0:07:37.560 get to know each other. And so I mean, you 0:07:37.640 --> 0:07:39.800 have this thought that new people are coming in every 0:07:39.840 --> 0:07:43.160 week because that's just paradise, and I honestly like really 0:07:43.160 --> 0:07:44.120 didn't give it any thought. 0:07:44.120 --> 0:07:46.240 I was just like, new people are coming in. 0:07:46.360 --> 0:07:48.920 I knew Susie was coming, I didn't know that Jill 0:07:49.040 --> 0:07:52.280 was coming, and I knew that Ali Joe and Priesta 0:07:52.320 --> 0:07:53.840 were both coming. So I was kind of just like, 0:07:54.400 --> 0:07:55.880 I guess we just kind of see. Like I was like, 0:07:55.920 --> 0:07:57.600 I don't think I'm worried about any of the girls 0:07:57.600 --> 0:08:00.640 that are already here, So it's gonna. 0:08:00.400 --> 0:08:02.640 Have to kind of be like, well, I mean I 0:08:02.640 --> 0:08:06.200 don't think anyone on in the history of this show, 0:08:06.280 --> 0:08:10.560 like week two's early, right, Like yeah, if you if 0:08:10.560 --> 0:08:12.120 you would have had an issue with him going on 0:08:12.160 --> 0:08:14.440 a date, that would have been like, Okay, it's it's 0:08:14.480 --> 0:08:17.840 pretty early, Like you got to explore when it's when 0:08:18.080 --> 0:08:21.760 we're only you know, it's really only like three three 0:08:21.880 --> 0:08:26.120 four days in. Yeah, he goes on the date, he 0:08:26.320 --> 0:08:30.920 comes back. Where is your head at when he gets back? Like, 0:08:31.800 --> 0:08:35.319 do you know, like what where he stands with this relationship? 0:08:36.320 --> 0:08:39.240 Well, so their date was like right before Rose ceremony. 0:08:39.320 --> 0:08:40.840 So while they were on their date, I was like 0:08:40.960 --> 0:08:43.240 I spent the day just like kind of vibing, Like 0:08:43.280 --> 0:08:44.880 I just spent the day at the pool honestly with 0:08:44.920 --> 0:08:46.840 Spencer and Jess, Like it was so fun and we 0:08:46.840 --> 0:08:49.960 were just like having a good time. I was so calm, 0:08:50.320 --> 0:08:53.120 which is really unlike me. I was so calm the 0:08:53.240 --> 0:08:54.920 entire day. I was just like, you know, I was 0:08:54.960 --> 0:08:57.720 in a good mental space, just being like whatever happens happened, 0:08:57.760 --> 0:09:00.839 and like that's really all that I can control. And 0:09:00.920 --> 0:09:03.480 then I think also like everyone else was kind of 0:09:03.520 --> 0:09:06.800 also having intense stress at that moment, so I was 0:09:06.840 --> 0:09:08.840 just like also trying to be there for my friends 0:09:08.840 --> 0:09:11.000 and also trying you know, there was just a lot 0:09:11.040 --> 0:09:13.800 going on at once, and so I think where my 0:09:14.200 --> 0:09:16.000 mental kind of was just like, oh shit. 0:09:15.960 --> 0:09:18.640 Like maybe I will be going home tonight. I really 0:09:18.720 --> 0:09:19.200 don't know. 0:09:19.360 --> 0:09:21.280 Like while I was packing, after I was dressed, I 0:09:21.360 --> 0:09:23.840 was like, yeah, maybe I should just like, you know, 0:09:24.600 --> 0:09:27.000 get it in my head that I'm feeling confident of 0:09:27.040 --> 0:09:28.880 where we are, but also like I don't know how 0:09:28.880 --> 0:09:31.600 the date's going. I know Susie's an amazing person, so 0:09:31.640 --> 0:09:34.679 like it's very you know, it's hard to say, like again, 0:09:34.760 --> 0:09:36.880 it's it's been like four days at this point, so 0:09:37.240 --> 0:09:39.880 it is kind of just like, oh, shoot, like something 0:09:40.120 --> 0:09:44.360 could change. And then I think, like going into cocktail hour, 0:09:44.720 --> 0:09:47.880 I was like, oh, yeah, like maybe there's a chance 0:09:47.920 --> 0:09:51.640 that things could really feel weird. I definitely felt like 0:09:51.800 --> 0:09:53.640 a little I wouldn't say like an energy shift. I 0:09:53.679 --> 0:09:55.560 was just like, oh, I'm a little bit nervous. I 0:09:55.559 --> 0:09:58.400 could tell like he seemed very conflicted. And then we 0:09:58.440 --> 0:10:00.920 had our conversation and I I was just like, listen, 0:10:01.840 --> 0:10:04.520 I don't want to be really emotional in this moment. 0:10:05.000 --> 0:10:07.680 Because I feel like I want you to make a decision, 0:10:07.840 --> 0:10:10.480 not because I'm upset, but because like this is actually 0:10:10.520 --> 0:10:11.400 the decision that. 0:10:11.480 --> 0:10:14.200 You want to make. And I remember sharing that with him. 0:10:14.240 --> 0:10:15.720 I was like, I don't want you to make a 0:10:15.760 --> 0:10:18.720 decision because I'm crying and like crying, screaming, throwing up. 0:10:18.760 --> 0:10:20.760 You know, I want you to make this decision because 0:10:20.880 --> 0:10:22.560 like this is what you want, and this is what 0:10:22.600 --> 0:10:26.200 you want on your journey, and you feel like that's 0:10:26.200 --> 0:10:29.680 how it should be. Because then like also it's just 0:10:29.960 --> 0:10:33.319 like it just gets messy when like someone's really emotionally 0:10:33.400 --> 0:10:34.720 like triggered. 0:10:34.320 --> 0:10:34.560 You know. 0:10:35.040 --> 0:10:37.079 So I feel like I just had to disassociate a 0:10:37.160 --> 0:10:38.800 coptail hour and I was like I just need to 0:10:40.000 --> 0:10:42.240 turn my brain off, just you know, I said my 0:10:42.360 --> 0:10:45.000 piece and whatever happens happens. 0:10:45.559 --> 0:10:48.160 And that Rose ceremony was like really nerve wracking. 0:10:48.160 --> 0:10:50.320 I feel like it felt like I was back on 0:10:50.480 --> 0:10:53.400 like night one of Grant season, just being like, oh crap, 0:10:53.520 --> 0:10:57.440 like things could really not go the way I want 0:10:57.480 --> 0:11:00.600 them to go. And so yeah, I mean, you know, 0:11:00.679 --> 0:11:04.080 it's it's a stressful situation, Like you understand both sides 0:11:04.120 --> 0:11:08.440 that you have to make these hard decisions and you 0:11:08.559 --> 0:11:12.520 just realize that it's paradise, Like really, anything can happen. 0:11:12.880 --> 0:11:18.080 Did Jeremy give you any like reassurance or any inkling 0:11:18.160 --> 0:11:20.640 into where his rose was going? 0:11:22.000 --> 0:11:25.040 I think that after we had our conversation, I honestly 0:11:25.040 --> 0:11:27.160 felt really good about our conversation. After we had it, 0:11:27.200 --> 0:11:29.800 I was still like a little emotionally shut down because 0:11:29.800 --> 0:11:32.840 I was still just trying to like process my emotions. Also, 0:11:33.000 --> 0:11:35.480 like I think everyone saw how much I cried on 0:11:35.559 --> 0:11:37.920 Grant season and also how much I cried Week one, 0:11:37.960 --> 0:11:40.559 So I was like, I don't want to be an 0:11:40.559 --> 0:11:43.440 emotional mess, So I just need a process in case 0:11:43.480 --> 0:11:44.320 I am going home. 0:11:44.360 --> 0:11:45.880 So I did like slightly go into. 0:11:45.800 --> 0:11:48.360 Rose ceremony, just like with the thought that like I 0:11:48.440 --> 0:11:52.120 actually really might be going home, so that I didn't like. 0:11:52.080 --> 0:11:52.920 Maybe scream cry. 0:11:53.000 --> 0:11:54.840 I don't know, like sometimes your emotions are just like 0:11:54.920 --> 0:11:58.640 not in tune in that moment, and I feel like 0:11:58.760 --> 0:12:00.760 I just told him. I was like, if it's not 0:12:00.760 --> 0:12:02.960 going to be me, all I want is like you 0:12:03.040 --> 0:12:04.800 to tell me that so I have time to like 0:12:04.920 --> 0:12:08.120 mentally prepare. And we never had time to have that 0:12:08.160 --> 0:12:12.800 conversation because you know, cocktail is quick it is you 0:12:12.880 --> 0:12:14.520 think you have all the time in the world and 0:12:14.559 --> 0:12:17.840 you you really don't. And so yeah, going in the 0:12:17.880 --> 0:12:21.360 rose ceremony, like the only small inkling I had, like 0:12:21.400 --> 0:12:23.600 when we passed each other, he like winked at me, 0:12:23.640 --> 0:12:25.240 and I was like, that's weird, Like why would you 0:12:25.240 --> 0:12:26.280 wink at someone if you're. 0:12:26.120 --> 0:12:26.920 Gonna send them home? 0:12:27.640 --> 0:12:30.520 Yeah, I was like, I was like, if he just 0:12:30.559 --> 0:12:32.240 like winked at me and sent me home, I'm fully 0:12:32.240 --> 0:12:35.439 crashing out, like I'm gonna rock it, like I'm going crazy. 0:12:36.160 --> 0:12:39.560 And so then you know, I was calm, thankfully, I 0:12:39.559 --> 0:12:41.800 see calm even after the wink and I was just like, 0:12:41.920 --> 0:12:44.600 I hope, you know things work out in my favor. 0:12:44.640 --> 0:12:48.280 And I was like if not, like you know, shortly 0:12:48.920 --> 0:12:49.600 it is what it is. 0:12:50.320 --> 0:12:53.440 We see that he does give you his rose during 0:12:53.440 --> 0:12:56.560 that row ceremony, and then we also see everything play 0:12:56.559 --> 0:12:59.720 out with Justin and Susie where they both end up 0:12:59.720 --> 0:13:05.120 going home. Was any part of you wondering had Susie stayed, 0:13:05.480 --> 0:13:09.240 if Jeremy and her would have continued exploring their relationship. 0:13:09.880 --> 0:13:13.400 Did you and Jeremy ever talk about Susie after that 0:13:13.520 --> 0:13:16.720 rose ceremony and maybe what their connection had looked like 0:13:16.720 --> 0:13:18.200 on the date and what it could have looked like 0:13:18.240 --> 0:13:19.000 if she stayed. 0:13:20.960 --> 0:13:24.160 Yeah, I feel like our conversation the next morning, like 0:13:24.320 --> 0:13:26.080 I just basically asked him, I was like, you know, 0:13:26.240 --> 0:13:28.640 are you feeling confident in your decision at this moment? 0:13:28.679 --> 0:13:30.640 And he was like, I think he's like I made 0:13:30.679 --> 0:13:33.280 the right decision, Like I think you know I And 0:13:33.320 --> 0:13:34.959 he asked me if I wanted to know about the date, 0:13:35.000 --> 0:13:36.600 and I honestly didn't want to know about the date 0:13:36.600 --> 0:13:38.280 because I feel like the whole point of paradise is 0:13:38.320 --> 0:13:41.520 that you go on dates with people and like who 0:13:41.600 --> 0:13:43.480 the point is like you're choosing the person that you 0:13:43.600 --> 0:13:47.160 choose for a reason, And so I honestly just like 0:13:47.200 --> 0:13:49.080 didn't really care about the date. I feel like if 0:13:49.120 --> 0:13:52.000 he really felt this connection, that he would have picked her, 0:13:52.080 --> 0:13:54.400 even if it was like a beginning spark, And so 0:13:54.640 --> 0:13:56.480 I was just like, I just have to be confident 0:13:56.520 --> 0:13:58.440 on like where we are. Obviously, I also had no 0:13:58.440 --> 0:14:00.800 idea that all these things were going on, and there's 0:14:00.840 --> 0:14:02.800 moments of doubt and there's all these things to process. 0:14:02.960 --> 0:14:06.800 But yeah, after that insane Row ceremony, like we too, 0:14:06.840 --> 0:14:09.080 that was a crazy Rose ceremony. I didn't really think 0:14:09.160 --> 0:14:11.760 much about it because I was kind of like okay, 0:14:12.160 --> 0:14:15.920 and kind of hearing Susie like her viewpoint after, Like 0:14:16.320 --> 0:14:18.080 I don't know if I really think it would have 0:14:18.200 --> 0:14:20.000 changed that much because it didn't feel like she wanted 0:14:20.000 --> 0:14:21.480 to get into a love triangle, and I think it 0:14:21.520 --> 0:14:25.400 would have been really messy anyway. So I obviously have 0:14:25.400 --> 0:14:27.480 no idea what like would have happened. I guess it 0:14:27.600 --> 0:14:29.000 just like kind of worked out in my favor in 0:14:29.040 --> 0:14:30.800 that moment, and I think. 0:14:30.720 --> 0:14:32.200 I was so focused on the present. 0:14:32.320 --> 0:14:34.720 I really wasn't giving like a lot of these like 0:14:34.760 --> 0:14:37.120 what ifs time, and you know, when you watch it back, 0:14:37.200 --> 0:14:38.080 you think about things. 0:14:38.120 --> 0:14:49.400 But yeah, I mean, well things are happening so fast too, 0:14:49.520 --> 0:14:51.880 Like just even the fact that you guys are going 0:14:51.880 --> 0:14:56.720 on dates on the same day as Rose ceremony. Yeah, 0:14:56.800 --> 0:15:00.040 like that's that's quick. That's things are moving fast. So 0:15:00.080 --> 0:15:02.480 I can totally understand how it's kind of like it's 0:15:02.520 --> 0:15:04.680 not even things getting swept under the rug. It's just 0:15:04.720 --> 0:15:07.320 like you know, the current's pushing you forward, and like 0:15:07.400 --> 0:15:09.360 if you didn't kind of jump onto something when it 0:15:09.400 --> 0:15:12.440 was happening, sometimes it gets a little left behind, but 0:15:13.360 --> 0:15:15.280 this one didn't get left behind. It did end up 0:15:15.280 --> 0:15:19.760 following you through the next few weeks. Let's talk about 0:15:20.400 --> 0:15:24.280 your date with Andrew. So the roseter remedy happens, basically, 0:15:24.280 --> 0:15:26.240 I think it was to the next day, Andrew comes 0:15:26.560 --> 0:15:30.880 down to Paradise, He talks to you and Alex. He 0:15:30.960 --> 0:15:33.960 ends up taking you on the date. Walk us through 0:15:34.240 --> 0:15:37.160 your decision to go on the date with Andrew and 0:15:37.200 --> 0:15:42.080 then your conversation with Jereby. 0:15:42.200 --> 0:15:44.520 Yeah, so I feel like I was really caught off 0:15:44.520 --> 0:15:47.360 guard by Andrew asking me to go on the date. 0:15:47.480 --> 0:15:50.120 I did know that Andrew was coming to the beach, 0:15:50.200 --> 0:15:53.640 but honestly, like I didn't really have like any thoughts 0:15:53.680 --> 0:15:55.760 about it. I just I didn't really give it that 0:15:55.880 --> 0:15:58.360 much like energy in my head. And the day that 0:15:58.400 --> 0:16:00.600 he arrived, I barely spoke to him, like I think 0:16:00.640 --> 0:16:02.360 I said hi, and then I just kind of like 0:16:02.440 --> 0:16:03.960 me and Jeremy were just kind of like off in 0:16:04.000 --> 0:16:07.160 the corner. And so I was really caught off guard 0:16:07.280 --> 0:16:09.760 when he like asked to speak to me, and I 0:16:09.800 --> 0:16:13.080 was like, oh, and I came into our conversation and 0:16:13.120 --> 0:16:14.480 I was like, oh, you want to take me on 0:16:14.520 --> 0:16:16.520 a date? I was like I haven't even given that thought, 0:16:16.600 --> 0:16:19.720 because like I wasn't expecting you to take me on 0:16:19.760 --> 0:16:23.640 a date, honestly, And in that moment, I was just like, well, 0:16:23.680 --> 0:16:25.120 I don't see why it would be a big deal. 0:16:25.200 --> 0:16:26.880 Like Jeremy just went on a date yesterday. 0:16:26.920 --> 0:16:30.400 The whole point of Paradise is that you go on dates, 0:16:30.440 --> 0:16:32.320 and like if you come back and choose your person, 0:16:32.360 --> 0:16:34.240 then like that's who you choose, and that's like that's 0:16:34.240 --> 0:16:35.360 what paradise is about. 0:16:36.320 --> 0:16:38.120 And so I was just like, I mean, yeah, I 0:16:38.120 --> 0:16:38.960 would love to go on a date. 0:16:39.000 --> 0:16:40.960 I've honestly never been on a one on one So 0:16:40.960 --> 0:16:42.720 I was like, I've never had a date and like 0:16:42.840 --> 0:16:43.840 bachelor history, and I. 0:16:43.800 --> 0:16:45.480 Would love to like know what these dates. 0:16:45.520 --> 0:16:47.200 I was like, this would be fun, Like you know, 0:16:47.320 --> 0:16:49.240 Andrew had a really good energy and like I feel 0:16:49.240 --> 0:16:51.240 like I really enjoyed our conversation. We're like a little 0:16:51.240 --> 0:16:53.320 bit similar and like kind of our hutean like in 0:16:53.360 --> 0:16:54.880 those kind of things. I was like, yeah, I feel 0:16:54.880 --> 0:16:56.440 like this will be fun, Like we'll have a good time. 0:16:57.600 --> 0:17:00.240 And like when Susie talked to me about going on 0:17:00.280 --> 0:17:01.880 the date with Jeremy, I was like, I think he'll 0:17:01.880 --> 0:17:04.119 have a great time, and like that was my thought process. 0:17:04.160 --> 0:17:06.760 And you know, obviously I don't. 0:17:06.560 --> 0:17:08.760 Think that Jeremy and I really had a conversation about 0:17:08.760 --> 0:17:10.760 me going on a date that night. Like earlier, we 0:17:10.760 --> 0:17:12.680 weren't like, oh, if someone new comes in, like will 0:17:12.680 --> 0:17:15.000 you go on the date? Because I wasn't really thinking 0:17:15.040 --> 0:17:16.879 I was going to go on the date. So I 0:17:16.920 --> 0:17:18.879 think my first thought was like, Okay, yeah, like I 0:17:18.880 --> 0:17:20.800 would be open to the date, but like, I definitely 0:17:20.800 --> 0:17:22.399 need to like talk to Jeremy about it because I 0:17:22.400 --> 0:17:24.080 feel like that's kind of like, you know, how you 0:17:24.200 --> 0:17:27.320 keep open and honest communication. And I was definitely caught 0:17:27.320 --> 0:17:31.399 off guard a little bit by you know, how upset 0:17:31.440 --> 0:17:33.240 he was, and it threw me off, Like I got 0:17:33.280 --> 0:17:35.239 really upset about the date, and then I was just 0:17:35.280 --> 0:17:38.600 like overwhelmed with emotions because I could have you know, 0:17:38.760 --> 0:17:40.679 and like you said, like things are happening so quickly, 0:17:40.720 --> 0:17:42.760 it's like you have no time to process. And the 0:17:42.840 --> 0:17:44.800 date was that night, so it's like all these things 0:17:44.800 --> 0:17:48.480 were happening like within you know, seconds or like minutes 0:17:48.520 --> 0:17:50.600 of each other. So I was just like I barely 0:17:50.640 --> 0:17:54.639 have time to to process this decide if I'm going 0:17:54.680 --> 0:17:56.000 to go on the date, and I just knew I 0:17:56.040 --> 0:17:58.040 wanted to leave Paradise with no regrets. So I was like, 0:17:58.200 --> 0:17:59.879 I mean, I know he's upset. I hope that he 0:18:00.080 --> 0:18:03.719 trust me and you know, sees how things go. And 0:18:03.760 --> 0:18:05.880 I was like, I was really calm, cool and collected, 0:18:05.920 --> 0:18:08.800 so like, that's what I also feel happens. Obviously that 0:18:08.840 --> 0:18:11.760 didn't happen, but you know, I was like, I was like, 0:18:11.800 --> 0:18:13.880 I still need to be present on like my journey 0:18:13.880 --> 0:18:15.280 here and make the most out of it. 0:18:15.359 --> 0:18:17.440 And so you know, that's how I went into it 0:18:17.520 --> 0:18:18.040 for the date. 0:18:18.560 --> 0:18:22.880 Yeah, it's interesting because when he told you about his date, 0:18:23.280 --> 0:18:27.520 you expressed a few minutes ago that your goal with 0:18:27.560 --> 0:18:31.119 the conversation was to not be too emotional because you 0:18:31.200 --> 0:18:33.720 wanted him to have a clear head to make his 0:18:33.800 --> 0:18:36.560 decision and not make a decision based off of your emotions. 0:18:37.240 --> 0:18:42.280 Did that contribute to, like your shock when he reacted 0:18:42.440 --> 0:18:45.360 so emotionally about you going in the date, and did 0:18:45.359 --> 0:18:48.400 it make you waiver in your decision in any way? 0:18:48.480 --> 0:18:50.159 Like did you feel swayed by his emotion? 0:18:51.359 --> 0:18:53.480 It's not that I like felt swayed about his emotion. 0:18:53.600 --> 0:18:56.800 I think, like, you know, you you care about this person. 0:18:56.840 --> 0:18:58.840 So I was like, oh, like, if they're upset, I 0:18:58.880 --> 0:19:00.639 feel upset, you know that kind of thing. So I 0:19:00.720 --> 0:19:02.879 was more just like, oh, I'm really worried about like 0:19:02.960 --> 0:19:06.080 how upset he is. I wasn't really processing his reaction 0:19:06.200 --> 0:19:08.160 in that moment. I was really just like more worried 0:19:08.160 --> 0:19:10.560 about his feelings and about you know, how he was 0:19:10.600 --> 0:19:11.360 feeling about me. 0:19:11.359 --> 0:19:12.120 Going on the date. 0:19:13.680 --> 0:19:17.800 And I mean he's normally a very like calm headed 0:19:17.840 --> 0:19:20.680 person what I've learned about him in these two weeks. 0:19:20.720 --> 0:19:22.480 So I was just like, oh, I you know, I 0:19:22.520 --> 0:19:24.120 wasn't really thinking it was going to be a thing 0:19:24.200 --> 0:19:26.320 because I was like, I think he'll be calm about it, 0:19:26.359 --> 0:19:29.880 and you know, but it's also it's a really high pressure, 0:19:30.000 --> 0:19:33.440 high intent situation, like you're really having to like process 0:19:33.480 --> 0:19:35.359 your emotions in paradise. You don't have a phone, you 0:19:35.359 --> 0:19:37.320 don't have like you can't call your mom, like you 0:19:37.320 --> 0:19:39.199 you really you have to process and be one with 0:19:39.240 --> 0:19:43.280 your emotions, and sometimes it just like it's skyrockets and 0:19:43.320 --> 0:19:46.240 it's like and I was definitely taken aback by that. 0:19:46.280 --> 0:19:48.760 I was like, oh, crap, Like he's really upset. I 0:19:48.800 --> 0:19:50.720 was not expecting him to be upset so I think 0:19:50.720 --> 0:19:52.040 that also really threw me off. 0:19:52.800 --> 0:19:59.600 I am an immature person. At times. I would have said, 0:20:00.880 --> 0:20:03.399 what the fuck you went on a date, you know, 0:20:03.720 --> 0:20:08.520 fifteen hours ago. Why is it an issue if I 0:20:08.720 --> 0:20:11.879 now go on a date. Did you ever think that 0:20:12.040 --> 0:20:12.800 or ever say that? 0:20:12.960 --> 0:20:14.280 Was that ever a kind of it would have been 0:20:14.320 --> 0:20:16.359 like I'm actually going to go date everyone on the 0:20:16.359 --> 0:20:16.880 speech now. 0:20:17.920 --> 0:20:22.960 No, I just don't date I meaning everyone like I. 0:20:22.960 --> 0:20:26.040 I guess, yeah, Like it would be like if this 0:20:26.200 --> 0:20:29.520 was like, you know, two weeks after and you guys 0:20:29.560 --> 0:20:32.280 kind of were more locked down and he was like visibly, 0:20:32.440 --> 0:20:35.200 then I would get it more. But because he had 0:20:35.640 --> 0:20:38.520 just went on a date in such a short period 0:20:38.560 --> 0:20:41.680 of time, it does seem just very hypocritical. 0:20:43.000 --> 0:20:45.600 Yeah, And looking back, there's like two sides. 0:20:45.640 --> 0:20:48.400 So it's like obviously the night before, like I expressed 0:20:48.440 --> 0:20:50.800 to him that like I was really only focused on him, 0:20:50.840 --> 0:20:53.200 and really I was like I wasn't really like I 0:20:53.240 --> 0:20:55.600 didn't really have like at that moment, like I had 0:20:55.640 --> 0:20:58.400 conversations with everyone, and like it was like him and I, 0:20:58.480 --> 0:21:01.119 like after going after Rose Serram, I was like, you know, 0:21:01.400 --> 0:21:03.920 there's not anyone I'm interested in, and like coming in 0:21:04.000 --> 0:21:06.080 I really didn't have Andrew on my radar, so it 0:21:06.119 --> 0:21:08.160 wasn't even like I was like, I hope Andrew takes 0:21:08.200 --> 0:21:09.520 me on the date, you know. I was kind of 0:21:09.520 --> 0:21:12.080 just like, oh, I'm shocked that you want to take 0:21:12.119 --> 0:21:13.800 me on the date, because I was also like, there's 0:21:13.880 --> 0:21:16.359 other people that aren't coupled up, and so like that 0:21:16.440 --> 0:21:19.280 was a lot to process, and I think in the moment, 0:21:19.400 --> 0:21:22.960 I couldn't even be like, wait, I just went on 0:21:23.000 --> 0:21:23.320 the date. 0:21:23.359 --> 0:21:25.199 But I think in some of the conversation I was like, 0:21:25.240 --> 0:21:26.400 you know, I just went on a date. 0:21:26.440 --> 0:21:28.679 You just went on a date yesterday. I didn't think 0:21:28.680 --> 0:21:30.040 it was going to be a big deal for me 0:21:30.119 --> 0:21:32.840 to go on the date, And at that moment, I 0:21:32.880 --> 0:21:35.879 couldn't even really react and be like I'm angry, you know. 0:21:35.920 --> 0:21:38.159 I was just more like, oh, I'm worried about your feelings, 0:21:38.640 --> 0:21:41.720 and I was like very emotionally thrown off. So I 0:21:41.760 --> 0:21:43.960 think it was more just it was just like a 0:21:44.000 --> 0:21:46.800 caught off guard moment. I feel like that's what paradise is. 0:21:46.840 --> 0:21:49.679 But it's like sometimes you don't even have time to 0:21:49.800 --> 0:21:52.560 like think in an angry matter, because like you don't 0:21:52.600 --> 0:21:54.840 have time to really process it. It was like i'd 0:21:54.880 --> 0:21:56.760 process going on the date. I has a talk to Jeremy. 0:21:57.400 --> 0:21:59.480 I'm leaving for the date. You know, it's so quick. 0:21:59.520 --> 0:22:02.919 So I think that's why probably after like I left, 0:22:03.440 --> 0:22:06.800 he had all this time, you know, to sit and 0:22:06.840 --> 0:22:09.040 think about me going on the date, and I really 0:22:09.080 --> 0:22:10.480 didn't have to. I was like, I just have to 0:22:10.480 --> 0:22:12.239 be in the moment on my date, and then like 0:22:12.320 --> 0:22:14.680 later I can reflect back on this moment and think 0:22:14.680 --> 0:22:17.320 about how I'm feeling and how things go on, and 0:22:17.359 --> 0:22:18.679 we can have a conversation about it. 0:22:19.200 --> 0:22:23.240 Yeah, Okay, so we see we see Jeremy somewhat spiral, 0:22:23.359 --> 0:22:26.960 which you know, he is getting a lot of heat 0:22:27.000 --> 0:22:28.800 for that, but like I do get it, Like you're 0:22:28.800 --> 0:22:31.879 in this situation, you spiral a little bit. He calls 0:22:31.920 --> 0:22:37.160 Susie bold move, but he does it. But when he 0:22:37.240 --> 0:22:39.400 gets back, or when you get back from the date, 0:22:39.480 --> 0:22:43.760 you end up choosing Jeremy and not Andrew. Does Jeremy 0:22:43.800 --> 0:22:47.040 ever address the fact that, like, hey, like I overreact it, 0:22:47.320 --> 0:22:50.879 like you know, like or even explain why he was 0:22:50.960 --> 0:22:53.359 upset that you went on the date, Like why is 0:22:53.400 --> 0:22:54.600 he that upset over it? 0:22:54.680 --> 0:22:54.880 Yeah? 0:22:54.920 --> 0:22:56.880 Is there a conversation that kind of closes that out. 0:22:57.680 --> 0:23:00.360 So the conversation like after the date, I obviously don't 0:23:00.359 --> 0:23:01.600 have time to see Jeremy. 0:23:01.680 --> 0:23:02.120 It's late. 0:23:02.160 --> 0:23:03.640 So we come back from the date, we go to sleep, 0:23:03.680 --> 0:23:05.320 I wake up the morning, the first person I want 0:23:05.320 --> 0:23:08.320 to see is obviously Jeremy. So we have like this 0:23:08.400 --> 0:23:11.280 moment where I discussed like the date, you know, I 0:23:11.359 --> 0:23:12.720 was like, do you want to know about the date? 0:23:12.880 --> 0:23:14.960 Like all these things, and I let him know that like, yes, 0:23:15.000 --> 0:23:16.320 I had a good time on the date, and like, 0:23:16.359 --> 0:23:18.719 I'm glad I went on the date, but ultimately, like 0:23:19.200 --> 0:23:22.359 I'm focused in on this, and I think where in 0:23:22.400 --> 0:23:24.080 that moment at least where he told me were his 0:23:24.119 --> 0:23:27.280 feelings of like you know, where he was upset. He 0:23:27.440 --> 0:23:29.639 just like felt like I was maybe being dishonest with 0:23:29.760 --> 0:23:31.760 him because like I had said that I was really 0:23:31.840 --> 0:23:35.320 locked into him, which in that moment I understood. I 0:23:35.359 --> 0:23:37.439 was like, yes, I still don't think it was like 0:23:37.480 --> 0:23:40.040 worth the freak out, just because like I was so calm, 0:23:40.560 --> 0:23:42.359 but also like at this point I've only known him 0:23:42.359 --> 0:23:44.200 for three weeks, so I actually really don't know how 0:23:44.240 --> 0:23:48.479 he processes, you know, intense moments like that, and I 0:23:48.520 --> 0:23:50.959 wasn't going to hold him too it either like his reaction, 0:23:51.040 --> 0:23:52.760 I was going to be like, oh, this reaction was 0:23:52.840 --> 0:23:55.080 so out of left field, like we're done, you know, 0:23:55.200 --> 0:23:58.439 that's that's too much like worst. We're in this like 0:23:58.520 --> 0:24:01.960 pressure cooker of intensity. So I feel like and there's 0:24:02.000 --> 0:24:04.960 moments like where my first thought isn't always to like 0:24:05.040 --> 0:24:07.560 choose anger. My first thought is like usually crying, so 0:24:07.600 --> 0:24:09.440 like when I'm frustrated, when I'm overwhelmed. So I feel 0:24:09.440 --> 0:24:13.919 like also every single person kind of reacts differently. But 0:24:14.000 --> 0:24:16.520 we did have a conversation and I was like, I'm 0:24:16.640 --> 0:24:20.199 sorry if I misled like my words the night before. 0:24:20.760 --> 0:24:22.600 I just really wasn't thinking that he was going to 0:24:22.640 --> 0:24:24.320 take me on the date. And that's really where a 0:24:24.400 --> 0:24:27.800 majority of like our conversation was about. Was just like, 0:24:27.960 --> 0:24:29.879 you know, I'm sorry for this, and he was like 0:24:29.920 --> 0:24:33.240 I shouldn't have really acted that way, and like, yeah, 0:24:33.480 --> 0:24:35.000 it was. It was like a tough it was a 0:24:35.040 --> 0:24:39.400 tough wash like that night and like going into that morning. Obviously, 0:24:39.400 --> 0:24:42.080 I think in hindsight, I didn't know about the phone call, 0:24:42.119 --> 0:24:44.119 so I wish that that morning would have been just 0:24:44.160 --> 0:24:47.680 like a moment where he was just like yeah and like, ah, yeah, 0:24:47.680 --> 0:24:49.960 I did actually spiral, and I did you know, fully 0:24:50.040 --> 0:24:52.520 let loose? And I called Susie, and I think it 0:24:52.560 --> 0:24:55.160 would have been easily squashed and it not turned into 0:24:55.200 --> 0:24:59.840 this whole thing, but it was. It was a tough 0:25:00.320 --> 0:25:02.360 like you're also like trying to shove so many things down, 0:25:02.359 --> 0:25:04.159 you know, like I don't have a phone where I 0:25:04.200 --> 0:25:06.280 can make a notes list and be like let me 0:25:06.359 --> 0:25:09.600 touch on this, on why this, and you know, reflecting back. 0:25:09.440 --> 0:25:11.040 On this, and. 0:25:10.640 --> 0:25:14.320 So you really are just like having all these conversations 0:25:14.320 --> 0:25:16.280 in all these thoughts based off what's going on in 0:25:16.280 --> 0:25:16.680 your head. 0:25:22.840 --> 0:25:24.879 Yeah, I have one question, then we'll jump into the 0:25:25.280 --> 0:25:29.720 meat of it this week's episode. Do you think, just hypothetically, 0:25:30.480 --> 0:25:35.840 if at the cocktail party someone had said tomorrow, Andrew's 0:25:35.880 --> 0:25:38.520 gonna come down and take Bailey on a date and 0:25:38.560 --> 0:25:42.120 she's gonna go on it, do you think he would 0:25:42.160 --> 0:25:43.320 have given Susie his rose? 0:25:45.880 --> 0:25:46.640 That's hard. 0:25:46.800 --> 0:25:51.719 I feel like maybe honestly, because like at that point, 0:25:51.840 --> 0:25:56.440 like we didn't obviously knowing Susie, like she wasn't gonna 0:25:56.560 --> 0:25:58.920 go on the date with Andrew because they're friends and 0:25:59.040 --> 0:26:01.560 he's friends with her ex boyfriend. So I think it 0:26:01.560 --> 0:26:03.800 would have definitely changed things if we obviously could have 0:26:03.880 --> 0:26:06.680 like looked into the future and seeing, yeah, like Andrew's 0:26:06.680 --> 0:26:08.680 gonna come in and like ask Bailey out a date, 0:26:08.720 --> 0:26:11.520 because like you know, there's also moments it's like you 0:26:11.560 --> 0:26:13.800 know certain people are coming in at some time, and 0:26:13.840 --> 0:26:16.159 so it's kind of like do I pick this person 0:26:16.240 --> 0:26:19.280 knowing that someone else really wants them? And it's like 0:26:19.359 --> 0:26:22.120 it's even like with honestly, like Ali Joe and Sam, 0:26:22.200 --> 0:26:24.120 like you know, we kind of knew that they would 0:26:24.119 --> 0:26:25.800 be a good match for each other. So it's also 0:26:25.920 --> 0:26:29.000 like you're taking that risk of giving your rose to 0:26:29.040 --> 0:26:31.840 someone knowing that maybe someone they could be interested in 0:26:31.960 --> 0:26:33.960 or someone that like has them top Like you know 0:26:34.000 --> 0:26:36.960 what I mean, it's like you kind of and the 0:26:36.960 --> 0:26:40.200 point of paradise is like, yes, like I'm I'm a person. 0:26:40.240 --> 0:26:43.280 I'm thinking about everyone's feelings and like the bigger picture 0:26:43.359 --> 0:26:46.080 and like you know, I'm thinking about your feelings how 0:26:46.080 --> 0:26:48.720 you're processing this, But you also have to think about 0:26:48.720 --> 0:26:51.840 yourself when you're in paradise, So like every decision you're 0:26:51.840 --> 0:26:54.400 making is based on like what's gonna have the best 0:26:54.440 --> 0:26:57.960 outcome for you? And so like honestly, if he probably 0:26:58.000 --> 0:27:00.640 would have known that like Andrew was coming down, maybe 0:27:00.680 --> 0:27:02.560 he would have picked Susie, even though not knowing the 0:27:02.600 --> 0:27:04.640 outcome of what I mean, I. 0:27:04.560 --> 0:27:08.320 Mean odds, odds, he probably would because his odds are 0:27:08.320 --> 0:27:11.920 probably be like, why risks, why risk would you know this? 0:27:12.119 --> 0:27:16.840 But anyways, okay, okay, so let's get we'll get into 0:27:16.880 --> 0:27:18.960 this episode where things get get crazy. 0:27:19.080 --> 0:27:21.800 Yeah, because obviously as viewers, we're seeing everything that you're 0:27:21.840 --> 0:27:25.120 not seeing. So we're seeing him spiral, We're seeing him 0:27:25.160 --> 0:27:29.680 call Susie, We're seeing these private chats that he thinks 0:27:29.680 --> 0:27:32.600 are private chats with Brian and him in the bedroom 0:27:32.640 --> 0:27:35.719 talking about I don't want to win this competition with Bailey, 0:27:35.960 --> 0:27:38.240 I don't want to go to the VIP suite with Bailey. 0:27:38.600 --> 0:27:42.359 I miss Susie. So this, as an audience member is 0:27:42.359 --> 0:27:44.800 a big build up moment because we are waiting for 0:27:44.840 --> 0:27:50.240 that day where you learn what we know that Jeremy 0:27:50.280 --> 0:27:53.760 has been saying and doing. I would not have expected 0:27:53.920 --> 0:27:56.080 it to be Brian to be the one to step 0:27:56.160 --> 0:27:59.919 up to do this. However, he's the guy in this episode. 0:28:00.440 --> 0:28:03.600 We see he says and multiple times in interviews, how 0:28:03.640 --> 0:28:06.280 much he likes you, how much he cares about you, 0:28:06.960 --> 0:28:10.040 and yes, there's a sense of like there's this new 0:28:10.040 --> 0:28:13.159 competition element, but it does really seem like his conscience 0:28:13.240 --> 0:28:17.760 is kind of playing a role. He's you know, we 0:28:17.800 --> 0:28:21.119 see all the confusion of he's asks you for a 0:28:21.119 --> 0:28:23.840 private chat, you think he's pursuing you. It's like, you know, 0:28:23.920 --> 0:28:26.960 a little bit of a mess. And then finally you're like, 0:28:27.000 --> 0:28:31.320 I don't want to date Brian. What is going on? Finally, 0:28:31.359 --> 0:28:35.359 you guys sit down and he kind of tells you 0:28:36.280 --> 0:28:40.040 everything that we as viewers have been waiting for you 0:28:40.120 --> 0:28:43.680 to learn. How did that moment feel and what was 0:28:43.720 --> 0:28:44.480 going through your mind? 0:28:45.800 --> 0:28:47.840 So much is going through my mind, I mean honestly, 0:28:47.880 --> 0:28:51.560 like I'm also unfortunately watching it back with you guys, 0:28:51.680 --> 0:28:52.640 and that sucks. 0:28:52.880 --> 0:28:55.400 It's kind of like, you know, you're like watching the 0:28:55.560 --> 0:28:57.600 You're watching something go on, and you're like, I had 0:28:57.600 --> 0:28:59.240 no idea these things were happening. 0:29:00.040 --> 0:29:00.640 It is. 0:29:01.160 --> 0:29:02.000 It's really hard. 0:29:02.040 --> 0:29:04.560 You're just like, oh my god, Like you know, I 0:29:04.600 --> 0:29:06.840 was just like, honestly in La La land, Like I 0:29:06.880 --> 0:29:08.800 just feel like I was just like it's Bailey's world, 0:29:08.800 --> 0:29:11.280 Like I'm just in Bailey's world and I'm just living 0:29:11.320 --> 0:29:11.920 in the moment. 0:29:12.080 --> 0:29:14.200 And then you're watching back and you're like, oh, I'm 0:29:14.240 --> 0:29:15.560 watching everyone else's. 0:29:15.320 --> 0:29:17.440 World and it's not. 0:29:20.360 --> 0:29:20.560 Thought. 0:29:20.680 --> 0:29:22.800 It was, Oh, it's. 0:29:22.680 --> 0:29:23.520 Not my world. 0:29:23.680 --> 0:29:25.440 It's actually really not my world. 0:29:25.560 --> 0:29:29.080 I'm actually living in everyone else's world and I'm just 0:29:29.200 --> 0:29:33.400 like a random. 0:29:31.760 --> 0:29:33.960 But it was, yeah, like, here's the thing. 0:29:34.200 --> 0:29:38.320 I do think that Brian was coming from a genuine place. 0:29:39.600 --> 0:29:43.360 I think that getting into this competition aspect, I still think, 0:29:43.880 --> 0:29:46.640 you know, there's always there's even if it is coming 0:29:46.640 --> 0:29:48.360 from a genuine place, there's still way it can be 0:29:48.440 --> 0:29:49.280 beneficial to you. 0:29:49.360 --> 0:29:50.040 Do you know what I mean? 0:29:50.320 --> 0:29:52.920 But I still felt like Brian was coming from a 0:29:52.960 --> 0:29:55.880 genuine place, and like he really expressed that in our conversation. 0:29:56.640 --> 0:29:58.320 Do I wish that he would have done it in 0:29:58.360 --> 0:30:01.200 the secret rendezvous way? No, because that caught me really 0:30:01.240 --> 0:30:03.600 off guard, and I think anyone that knows me, I'm like, 0:30:03.600 --> 0:30:05.600 I'm a taurist, I'm a super loyal person. 0:30:05.960 --> 0:30:09.360 So like I was just like, oh, whoa, No, Like. 0:30:09.280 --> 0:30:11.440 I was like absolutely not, Like I didn't know that 0:30:11.440 --> 0:30:13.400 that was the point of the conversation. I was like, 0:30:14.200 --> 0:30:16.040 I'm not about to have a secret rendezvous with you, 0:30:16.080 --> 0:30:17.560 because like that's insane work. 0:30:17.680 --> 0:30:20.160 Like I would I'm not that I'm not gonna step 0:30:20.160 --> 0:30:20.480 out of. 0:30:20.400 --> 0:30:22.800 My character just because like maybe you have something to 0:30:22.840 --> 0:30:24.800 tell me, Like I'm like, tell it to me at breakfast, 0:30:24.920 --> 0:30:26.720 Like what is this gonna change? Like I was like, 0:30:26.920 --> 0:30:29.240 you can't have this conversation with me in front of anyone, 0:30:29.320 --> 0:30:32.280 like at that moment. I'm also obviously the last person 0:30:32.320 --> 0:30:34.760 to know, so I had no idea that this is 0:30:34.760 --> 0:30:37.440 the purpose of the conversation. I had no idea why 0:30:37.480 --> 0:30:39.440 he wanted to have the secret rendezvous. And the whole 0:30:39.440 --> 0:30:41.720 point of secret rendezvous is like so maybe you're like 0:30:42.680 --> 0:30:45.000 seeing who else you're compatible with and all these things, 0:30:45.000 --> 0:30:46.880 And I was just like, oh, this is just like 0:30:46.920 --> 0:30:48.959 not something I'm interested in, like you know, because like 0:30:49.040 --> 0:30:51.880 I have chosen Jeremy, He's chosen me, So like that's 0:30:51.920 --> 0:30:53.880 where my head was. I was like, we also just 0:30:53.920 --> 0:30:56.520 had like an insanely fun one on one date last week, 0:30:56.600 --> 0:30:58.560 so like why would why would anyone even think that 0:30:58.600 --> 0:31:02.960 I would do a secret rendezvous. I'm still We're really 0:31:03.000 --> 0:31:05.880 grateful to Brian for telling me. It was such a 0:31:05.880 --> 0:31:08.200 shitty feeling, like knowing that I was the last person 0:31:08.440 --> 0:31:12.760 to like find out about this and every other person 0:31:12.840 --> 0:31:15.840 knew about it, like in the grand scheme of things, 0:31:15.880 --> 0:31:17.880 Like I just wish that Jeremy would have told me. 0:31:18.240 --> 0:31:20.320 I don't know where like his mind is at the 0:31:20.360 --> 0:31:22.640 time as to why he didn't tell me, or maybe 0:31:22.680 --> 0:31:24.640 things were going so good he didn't want to like 0:31:24.720 --> 0:31:25.000 you know. 0:31:25.320 --> 0:31:25.960 Dampen the mood. 0:31:26.000 --> 0:31:28.960 And I will say like I was very emotionally like upset, 0:31:29.000 --> 0:31:32.240 like coming off of having to send Gary and Leslie home, 0:31:32.400 --> 0:31:35.800 Like my emotions were just like out of whack. And 0:31:35.840 --> 0:31:39.680 so when Brian told me, it like really set me 0:31:39.720 --> 0:31:41.920 off emotionally, like I just like shut down. I was 0:31:42.000 --> 0:31:44.280 just like it felt like everything had just been like 0:31:44.360 --> 0:31:48.160 building up for what we're in week like I don't 0:31:48.160 --> 0:31:50.479 know this week six, week five, and I was just 0:31:50.560 --> 0:31:53.400 like I'm like I'm done, Like I was like I'm out, 0:31:53.520 --> 0:31:56.440 like this is this is too much for me, Like 0:31:56.480 --> 0:31:58.360 I don't even care about the five hundred thousand dollars 0:31:58.400 --> 0:32:02.560 at this point because like emotionally I'm drained, like I'm 0:32:02.640 --> 0:32:05.040 at I'm on e like I can't take it anymore. 0:32:06.520 --> 0:32:08.080 And I just wish that, like I don't know some 0:32:08.120 --> 0:32:10.120 of my friends would have told me, because like I 0:32:10.160 --> 0:32:12.560 just feel like, you know, in my head, like, yes, 0:32:12.720 --> 0:32:14.360 Jeremy should have been the person to tell me, and 0:32:14.400 --> 0:32:16.120 then secondly my friend should have told me. So it's 0:32:16.120 --> 0:32:17.840 like kind of hard because you're going down the chain 0:32:17.880 --> 0:32:20.200 of people that you wish would have told you before 0:32:20.720 --> 0:32:24.720 you got to Brian telling you. And that was really 0:32:24.720 --> 0:32:27.280 hard because that just totally threw me off. And the 0:32:27.280 --> 0:32:30.080 Secret rendezvouth every it was like every single week, I 0:32:30.120 --> 0:32:32.160 was just being thrown off honestly, like I was caught 0:32:32.160 --> 0:32:34.960 off guard every single day of Paradise and that's a 0:32:35.000 --> 0:32:36.520 really like crazy feeling. 0:32:37.960 --> 0:32:39.640 And that was just a really. 0:32:39.360 --> 0:32:42.360 Insane day for me because I was just like I 0:32:42.400 --> 0:32:44.600 was tired from the challenge. I was like, oh, I'm 0:32:44.640 --> 0:32:47.080 excited to like see Jeremy now we've you know, we 0:32:47.080 --> 0:32:50.160 were all separate, separate for the challenge. It's like, you know, 0:32:50.200 --> 0:32:53.000 we're doing this, We're doing our compatibility challenge and things 0:32:53.000 --> 0:32:53.320 like that. 0:32:53.640 --> 0:32:56.560 And so going into just the. 0:32:56.600 --> 0:32:58.840 Night like where we would all hang out, like I 0:32:58.880 --> 0:33:02.080 got ready that I got served with the Secret Rendezvous note, 0:33:02.120 --> 0:33:06.400 I'm just like, whoaf Like these things are being thrown 0:33:06.400 --> 0:33:08.000 at me like left and right, and I was just 0:33:08.040 --> 0:33:11.440 like and then like I also like being the kind 0:33:11.440 --> 0:33:13.440 of person I was. I was like, I don't want 0:33:13.440 --> 0:33:15.560 to just like tell everyone about this like note that 0:33:15.600 --> 0:33:18.560 I've received, because like I actually don't know the purpose 0:33:18.600 --> 0:33:21.280 of the note, so like I don't I don't want 0:33:21.280 --> 0:33:22.200 to make it into. 0:33:21.960 --> 0:33:23.520 Something more than it actually is. 0:33:23.600 --> 0:33:25.920 I was like, and even then, as I'm like talking 0:33:25.920 --> 0:33:28.200 to Friesa, I'm like, I don't want her to think that, 0:33:28.360 --> 0:33:31.000 like Bri, what if I don't actually like it's my 0:33:31.160 --> 0:33:34.000 feeling that something sneaky is happening happening right now, but 0:33:34.240 --> 0:33:36.560 I actually don't know, So like who would I be 0:33:36.720 --> 0:33:38.880 to be the person to be like, you know, Brian 0:33:38.960 --> 0:33:41.520 sent me a secret rendezvous and you know, I'm talking 0:33:41.560 --> 0:33:43.000 to my friend and I just didn't want to like 0:33:43.920 --> 0:33:46.560 add to whatever they had going on and like make 0:33:46.600 --> 0:33:48.520 it worse. I was like, I really need to process this, 0:33:48.640 --> 0:33:50.240 and like I need to talk to Jeremy about this 0:33:50.320 --> 0:33:53.080 because I also like don't want it seemed like I'm 0:33:53.080 --> 0:33:55.320 being sneaky, Like I feel like the worst thing you 0:33:55.320 --> 0:33:57.360 can do a paradise is like be portrayed as being 0:33:57.400 --> 0:33:59.560 sneaky like and I was like, and I'm just not 0:33:59.560 --> 0:34:01.200 that kind of so I was just like I need 0:34:01.240 --> 0:34:03.920 to be like really open and honest and really processed 0:34:03.960 --> 0:34:06.560 this like note first, and then I can go into 0:34:06.600 --> 0:34:08.560 other things and then obviously like Brian and Brees to 0:34:08.640 --> 0:34:10.799 talk about it. And you know, I'm glad because I 0:34:10.800 --> 0:34:13.479 think me immediately going off and telling everyone of being. 0:34:13.400 --> 0:34:15.000 Like Brian gave me this note, Brian did this, this 0:34:15.040 --> 0:34:15.239 is and. 0:34:15.239 --> 0:34:17.600 This, and like I think it would have made things 0:34:17.640 --> 0:34:20.280 like a thousand times worse and really. 0:34:20.120 --> 0:34:21.239 Would have been a big blow up. 0:34:21.440 --> 0:34:23.600 And even after Brian told me about it, like I 0:34:23.719 --> 0:34:26.000 tried to really address it to Jeremy, not in a 0:34:26.040 --> 0:34:28.920 sense of like Brian told me this, you know, at 0:34:28.920 --> 0:34:31.920 that point everyone knew but me, So really it's like. 0:34:31.880 --> 0:34:32.719 Everyone told me. 0:34:32.800 --> 0:34:35.080 In my head, I'm like everyone told me because they 0:34:35.080 --> 0:34:39.560 didn't tell me it was it's really like hard, it's 0:34:39.560 --> 0:34:42.719 hard to watch this majority of the season has been 0:34:42.760 --> 0:34:43.719 a hard watch for me. 0:34:44.880 --> 0:34:48.160 You're joying it, but yeah, I mean you're you're going 0:34:48.200 --> 0:34:50.160 through it, So I feel for you for sure, because 0:34:50.200 --> 0:34:54.120 you are. It's not an easy experience. And I feel 0:34:54.120 --> 0:34:59.440 like Jeremy calling Susie as much as like that sucks, 0:35:00.000 --> 0:35:04.560 and like I feel like you can get over something 0:35:04.600 --> 0:35:07.120 like that because you guys were still very early on 0:35:07.160 --> 0:35:10.120 in your relationship, like he he fucked up. He didn't 0:35:10.160 --> 0:35:12.360 tell you, Like that's a huge mistake on his part, 0:35:13.040 --> 0:35:17.239 and but it's like it was early on. Emotions were everywhere. 0:35:17.280 --> 0:35:21.480 He spiraled, he freaked out, and he had a bad moment. 0:35:22.440 --> 0:35:27.279 But now we're like a couple more episodes in and 0:35:27.320 --> 0:35:30.040 then like you know, he tells Brian in his room, 0:35:30.320 --> 0:35:33.920 like I like something like I would still get engaged 0:35:33.920 --> 0:35:35.880 to Susie or whatever the fuck, or like I still 0:35:35.920 --> 0:35:38.919 like I still have feelings for Susie. How does that 0:35:39.000 --> 0:35:42.080 sit with you? Because it feels like you're, at least 0:35:42.080 --> 0:35:46.920 from what we're seeing, your relationship has progressed since the 0:35:46.960 --> 0:35:49.560 moment he called Susie. And then it's like weeks later 0:35:49.600 --> 0:35:50.680 he still kind of says that. 0:35:51.160 --> 0:35:54.200 Yeah, yeah, I think you question like the seriousness of 0:35:54.239 --> 0:35:55.960 your relationship and where he stands in it. 0:35:56.680 --> 0:35:59.560 Yeah, Like watching it back, so it's like obviously the 0:35:59.560 --> 0:36:02.719 phone all happened week three, and then going into week four, 0:36:02.800 --> 0:36:04.719 I think it's like maybe that's like day nine of 0:36:04.760 --> 0:36:09.399 Paradise and hearing those comments, it's like never nice because 0:36:09.440 --> 0:36:11.279 you know how you're feeling in that moment, like in 0:36:11.320 --> 0:36:13.680 the moment, I'm like, you know, I'm feeling so happy, 0:36:13.680 --> 0:36:16.480 I'm feeling locked in. I'm feeling like we're really growing 0:36:16.480 --> 0:36:18.920 as a strong couple, and I feel like my I 0:36:19.239 --> 0:36:21.000 actually think in the moment, if I would have just 0:36:21.080 --> 0:36:23.520 known that there were like all these doubts, it wouldn't 0:36:23.560 --> 0:36:25.440 be like as big of a deal. We would have 0:36:25.520 --> 0:36:28.040 just been able to like have these conversations, and I 0:36:28.040 --> 0:36:31.160 wouldn't necessarily watch it back and be like, oh, that's 0:36:31.239 --> 0:36:32.880 like the worst feeling. 0:36:32.640 --> 0:36:33.719 Ever, you know what I mean. 0:36:33.880 --> 0:36:37.040 And it's hard because, like I'm also someone if there 0:36:37.120 --> 0:36:39.240 was like moments where I was having doubt, I would 0:36:39.239 --> 0:36:40.839 just internally process those. 0:36:41.880 --> 0:36:43.640 I know, I'm on TV, you know what I mean. 0:36:43.800 --> 0:36:46.880 I know that I'm gonna watch back some of these things, 0:36:47.320 --> 0:36:49.239 and the last thing I want to do is like 0:36:49.360 --> 0:36:51.799 talk out of my character. I obviously like can't say 0:36:51.840 --> 0:36:53.120 if that was talking out of it, you know what 0:36:53.200 --> 0:36:55.040 I mean, Like in the moment, maybe he's just like 0:36:55.080 --> 0:36:58.160 having a conversation with his dudes. But that was like 0:36:58.239 --> 0:37:01.200 horrible to watch back, you know, it was hard to process. 0:37:01.320 --> 0:37:04.960 It was like week four, and yes, we were progressing 0:37:04.960 --> 0:37:08.640 in our relationship. I also think like it's hard because 0:37:08.760 --> 0:37:10.840 in normal parent at this point, we don't know that 0:37:10.880 --> 0:37:12.680 it's a competition, you know, we don't know that there's 0:37:12.680 --> 0:37:14.879 not people coming in. So in normal paradise, I think 0:37:14.880 --> 0:37:17.000 that there's moments where you have like little doubts in 0:37:17.040 --> 0:37:19.680 your relationship and I wish that we would have just 0:37:19.719 --> 0:37:22.400 had a conversation about it. I actually like, and I 0:37:22.400 --> 0:37:25.040 think we see this like coming off the morning after 0:37:25.120 --> 0:37:27.719 me finding out about the phone call, Like it wasn't 0:37:27.760 --> 0:37:30.560 the issue of the phone call, Like I didn't think 0:37:30.600 --> 0:37:32.239 that that was that big of an issue. It was 0:37:32.280 --> 0:37:35.120 more the issue of not knowing that the phone call 0:37:35.160 --> 0:37:38.439 had happened, and then even worse, everyone else knowing about 0:37:38.440 --> 0:37:40.640 the phone call, because it could have just been like 0:37:41.000 --> 0:37:43.040 so squashed. It didn't have to be like something that 0:37:43.080 --> 0:37:45.439 took over this entire season, you know what I mean, 0:37:45.520 --> 0:37:49.720 something that like dragged on for me. And it's really 0:37:49.800 --> 0:37:55.200 hard to process that. Like I think I'm still processing 0:37:55.239 --> 0:37:57.440 it every week because I just remember how I'm feeling 0:37:57.480 --> 0:38:00.680 in the moment, and I'm remembering our conversation and they 0:38:00.680 --> 0:38:03.160 were amazing because obviously, why would we progress to this 0:38:03.360 --> 0:38:07.000 moment and this time if like we weren't like really 0:38:07.040 --> 0:38:09.239 liking each other and like even on our date, like 0:38:09.920 --> 0:38:12.600 our date was amazing, that was like my best That's 0:38:12.640 --> 0:38:14.440 my best first day I've ever had, like in my 0:38:14.640 --> 0:38:17.120 entire life. And I feel like we just got to 0:38:17.120 --> 0:38:20.760 get really deep, and I mean, I know how I felt, 0:38:20.760 --> 0:38:22.200 So I feel like I just kind of have to 0:38:22.239 --> 0:38:24.160 be like, Okay, I just have to be like what 0:38:24.280 --> 0:38:26.319 I mean, what can I really do? Like it kind 0:38:26.360 --> 0:38:29.359 of happened, and I wish that we would have had 0:38:29.360 --> 0:38:31.120 time to talk about it in the moment or like 0:38:31.200 --> 0:38:33.920 him just talk to me about it and be like, hey, 0:38:34.120 --> 0:38:36.480 like I'm going to be honest, like I really like you, 0:38:36.920 --> 0:38:39.080 but I'm also like still having these like things of 0:38:39.120 --> 0:38:41.560 doubts and maybe we could have like talked about it. 0:38:41.680 --> 0:38:45.960 But yeah, it's it's really horrible watching it back, honestly. Yeah. 0:38:46.000 --> 0:38:50.440 Yeah, Okay, So you know, it's obviously it's tough watching 0:38:50.480 --> 0:38:52.560 all the people that are you're close with know something 0:38:52.680 --> 0:38:54.840 about you and not tell you. And I get some 0:38:54.920 --> 0:38:58.000 of the reasoning is they're also friends with Jeremy. If 0:38:58.000 --> 0:39:01.320 the Roles war reversed and this was happening to Alex, 0:39:01.520 --> 0:39:04.440 do you think you would have what the way your 0:39:04.440 --> 0:39:06.480 relationship is do you think you would have told her. 0:39:07.320 --> 0:39:09.560 Like a thousand percent, I would have not even like 0:39:09.960 --> 0:39:12.040 that night, I would have come back and I would 0:39:12.080 --> 0:39:13.000 have talked to her about that. 0:39:13.680 --> 0:39:14.759 That's just the kind of person that. 0:39:14.719 --> 0:39:20.080 I am, Like, I hold like my friendships to a 0:39:20.120 --> 0:39:21.839 really high standard. It doesn't mean that I don't I 0:39:21.880 --> 0:39:23.959 hold the person that I'm like talking to and dating 0:39:24.000 --> 0:39:26.240 to a high standard. But I feel like if anyone 0:39:26.360 --> 0:39:29.520 should have my back, it should be my friends, because really, like, 0:39:30.600 --> 0:39:32.359 no shade, but like, what is this guy that I've 0:39:32.400 --> 0:39:33.680 known for three. 0:39:33.480 --> 0:39:35.040 Weeks owe me? Do you know what I mean? Like, 0:39:35.080 --> 0:39:36.120 what does he owe to me? 0:39:36.239 --> 0:39:38.680 Like my friends that I've come close with that I'm 0:39:38.719 --> 0:39:41.440 confiding and that I'm like, you know, and I'm sharing 0:39:41.480 --> 0:39:44.000 to them how deep I'm getting into our relationship and 0:39:44.000 --> 0:39:47.040 how deep I'm feeling. And I feel like the first 0:39:47.080 --> 0:39:50.600 thing my first thought would have been like, Okay, I 0:39:50.719 --> 0:39:53.280 like me to tell you about this, like immediately, and 0:39:53.480 --> 0:39:55.319 then kind of finding out about all the girls that 0:39:55.360 --> 0:39:57.840 I also got so close with there also kind of 0:39:57.880 --> 0:39:59.880 finding out I just like don't understand why no one 0:40:00.080 --> 0:40:03.160 told me. I think maybe I know I didn't want 0:40:03.160 --> 0:40:05.360 to know about his date with Susie. But like, I 0:40:05.360 --> 0:40:07.080 think it was very clear that I didn't know about 0:40:07.080 --> 0:40:11.239 the phone call, and so I don't know, maybe people 0:40:11.280 --> 0:40:13.320 didn't want to ruin like a good thing going on. 0:40:13.440 --> 0:40:15.839 But yeah, it's really hard. 0:40:15.880 --> 0:40:18.319 Everyone's in on a joke and you're not in on it, 0:40:18.360 --> 0:40:20.319 and it kind of felt like, you know, my love 0:40:20.360 --> 0:40:24.520 life is like unfortunately the joke that everyone's in on. Yeah, 0:40:24.200 --> 0:40:27.120 I'm just like a bystander. Just you know, I'm back 0:40:27.120 --> 0:40:30.719 in Bailey World and there's like bombs being thrown at it. 0:40:31.080 --> 0:40:32.200 You know, I have no idea. 0:40:33.480 --> 0:40:35.239 Yeah, just like knowing the kind of person I am, 0:40:35.440 --> 0:40:39.399 like I wouldn't have maybe told everyone, because I think 0:40:39.440 --> 0:40:41.640 everyone probably wouldn't have known. I would have just like 0:40:41.760 --> 0:40:44.600 told you know, that person, like directly. I would have 0:40:44.600 --> 0:40:46.879 just told her like we're sharing a room every single 0:40:46.960 --> 0:40:50.320 night together, and so yeah, that's how I would have acted. Obviously, 0:40:50.400 --> 0:40:54.200 I understand there's like she's friends with Jeremy and that's hard, 0:40:55.280 --> 0:40:57.400 but like I also like, do like really ride or 0:40:57.400 --> 0:40:59.840 die for my girls? So like when you become my, 0:41:00.239 --> 0:41:01.960 I felt like we were all so close there. We 0:41:02.000 --> 0:41:06.040 spent every single day together, you know, I really felt 0:41:06.080 --> 0:41:09.400 so close to these people, and like that's why, like 0:41:09.480 --> 0:41:11.799 even sending home Gary and Leslie was so hard for me, 0:41:11.840 --> 0:41:14.680 because I had just gotten so close to Gary and 0:41:14.920 --> 0:41:17.359 Leslie and it literally felt like I was like killing them, 0:41:17.640 --> 0:41:19.160 Like that's what it felt like for me. I was like, 0:41:19.200 --> 0:41:21.360 I was like, I'm literally throwing them off a cliff 0:41:21.840 --> 0:41:24.440 and ending their paradise time. And so I feel like 0:41:24.480 --> 0:41:26.479 that's why I was also like so emotional. I think 0:41:26.960 --> 0:41:29.200 that's what kind of also made the phone call hit 0:41:29.280 --> 0:41:31.120 even harder, because it was just like I would have 0:41:31.400 --> 0:41:34.800 liked someone that, you know, I was very connected to 0:41:34.800 --> 0:41:38.600 to tell me, for Jeremy and for all my friends, 0:41:38.600 --> 0:41:38.920 and so. 0:41:39.160 --> 0:41:43.120 Yeah, okay, and then quick last question before we got 0:41:43.160 --> 0:41:47.160 to let you go. Why do you think that everyone 0:41:47.520 --> 0:41:51.239 villainized Brian for telling you? It felt like everyone was 0:41:51.280 --> 0:41:57.360 collectively mad and felt betrayed by Brian, and we're almost 0:41:57.360 --> 0:41:59.520 like we got to get him out of here, when 0:42:00.640 --> 0:42:03.040 I'm sure from your perspective, you're like, I'm actually so 0:42:03.160 --> 0:42:06.600 happy he did that, and I feel a greater sense 0:42:06.600 --> 0:42:07.680 of trust towards Brian. 0:42:07.840 --> 0:42:10.560 Now, yeah, I mean, like the only one that the 0:42:10.560 --> 0:42:12.640 only one that it makes sense who would be upset 0:42:12.680 --> 0:42:15.479 with Brian would be Jeremy, because Jeremy's I told you 0:42:15.480 --> 0:42:17.160 you shouldn't send anything, but he did. 0:42:17.239 --> 0:42:17.479 Yes. 0:42:17.520 --> 0:42:20.320 But I mean we see Spencer, a little bit of Andrew, 0:42:20.680 --> 0:42:23.600 a lot of Cat and Dale basically saying like, we 0:42:23.719 --> 0:42:27.160 can't trust this person. But from my perspective, it's like, well, 0:42:27.640 --> 0:42:30.800 he you actually can trust him because if someone's doing something, 0:42:31.480 --> 0:42:34.719 you know that feels shady to him, he's going to 0:42:35.040 --> 0:42:37.520 be honest with you about it. Can you just give 0:42:37.560 --> 0:42:38.640 us a little bit of insight into that? 0:42:39.239 --> 0:42:39.439 Yeah? 0:42:39.480 --> 0:42:43.280 I think the thing is I see both sides. I 0:42:43.360 --> 0:42:45.759 am so grateful that Brian told me. I would have 0:42:45.840 --> 0:42:48.080 hated to like come off of this and then have 0:42:48.200 --> 0:42:50.040 this conversation and be like, oh I went through this 0:42:50.200 --> 0:42:52.440 entire season and not known that this happened and these 0:42:52.440 --> 0:42:53.400 comments are made. 0:42:54.239 --> 0:42:56.759 I would have literally been distraught. 0:42:57.120 --> 0:43:00.600 Obviously was still really it's still really hard processing every 0:43:00.640 --> 0:43:02.279 single episode. I think it's going to take me a 0:43:02.280 --> 0:43:05.200 while to like really you know, process it all. But 0:43:07.320 --> 0:43:10.080 in regards like everyone kind of like going against Brian. 0:43:10.200 --> 0:43:12.279 Obviously earlier that night when I thought he was being 0:43:12.320 --> 0:43:15.440 really sneaky, I was like, no, like, you know, Brian's 0:43:15.480 --> 0:43:17.319 got to go. He's being sneaky and then learning that 0:43:17.360 --> 0:43:19.960 he wasn't. I was so thankful and grateful to him, 0:43:20.320 --> 0:43:24.000 and I kind of wish that people would have seen that. 0:43:24.320 --> 0:43:26.000 You know, maybe you guys should have just told me 0:43:26.040 --> 0:43:27.640 and we wouldn't have had to get to this moment 0:43:27.719 --> 0:43:29.640 where like people are scared they're going to go home, 0:43:29.680 --> 0:43:32.200 and like I felt like the reason Brian told me 0:43:32.360 --> 0:43:35.040 is because he was slightly scared, Like, you know, he 0:43:35.040 --> 0:43:37.239 could have gone home the week before, and he was like, 0:43:37.280 --> 0:43:38.920 I didn't want to leave knowing that no one was 0:43:38.960 --> 0:43:40.960 going to tell you, or knowing that people were going 0:43:41.000 --> 0:43:43.120 to wait to tell you. And I had and I 0:43:43.200 --> 0:43:45.279 knew this and I didn't tell you, and so I 0:43:45.440 --> 0:43:47.520 you know, he expressed that to me in that moment too. 0:43:48.080 --> 0:43:51.560 And I think it's like a mix of things like obviously, 0:43:51.560 --> 0:43:53.200 you know he's had some freak out moments. I think 0:43:53.239 --> 0:43:55.839 people are also like the girls know about the freak 0:43:55.880 --> 0:43:57.360 out in the pool and things like that. 0:43:57.360 --> 0:43:58.919 I don't maybe freak out, it's not the threat word, 0:43:58.960 --> 0:43:59.640 but you know what I mean. 0:43:59.800 --> 0:44:02.239 So I think it's like a double edged sword. They're like, 0:44:02.400 --> 0:44:05.880 can we trust you? Also, these things are kind of happening. 0:44:06.760 --> 0:44:09.240 I kind of wish that people would have just listened 0:44:09.280 --> 0:44:12.200 to me and been like, guys, like, I'm not mad 0:44:12.239 --> 0:44:16.040 at Brian, like him and Freese's relationship. That's a different 0:44:16.040 --> 0:44:17.960 thing if you guys are voting based off that, like 0:44:18.040 --> 0:44:21.520 that's what it is. I understand Jeremy feeling like he 0:44:21.560 --> 0:44:25.839 broke broad code, but I'm also really still obviously I'm 0:44:25.840 --> 0:44:28.080 grateful to Brian in that moment because I was just like, well, 0:44:28.120 --> 0:44:30.600 no one's gonna tell me, and I would have hated 0:44:30.680 --> 0:44:35.200 not knowing about that. So it's kind of hard. It's like, 0:44:36.760 --> 0:44:38.960 you know, what can you do with like at that 0:44:39.600 --> 0:44:43.080 timely moment. But I think everyone like also, like to 0:44:43.080 --> 0:44:45.080 be fair, we really didn't have that much like drama 0:44:45.120 --> 0:44:47.960 going on, so it did feel just like boom, like 0:44:48.320 --> 0:44:51.400 so intense like when And that's why I kind of 0:44:51.440 --> 0:44:55.319 didn't want everyone to know that he told me. And 0:44:55.360 --> 0:44:57.080 then I think it kind of like got out, but 0:44:57.160 --> 0:44:59.480 like I didn't tell anyone that he told me, you 0:44:59.480 --> 0:45:01.440 know what I mean, And I made it seem like 0:45:01.440 --> 0:45:03.080 he was coming to me to talk about Parsa. 0:45:03.560 --> 0:45:06.959 So yeah, that was kind of hard. 0:45:07.960 --> 0:45:10.920 That was, and I mean, you know, him and Paresa's 0:45:10.920 --> 0:45:13.120 relationship and everyone voting like or whatever. 0:45:13.320 --> 0:45:14.160 That's a different thing. 0:45:14.600 --> 0:45:18.919 But I understand the guys like perspective, and I also 0:45:19.120 --> 0:45:21.520 understand my perspective. And I think in that moment, everyone 0:45:21.560 --> 0:45:24.319 should have really thought about like my feelings and not 0:45:24.600 --> 0:45:27.880 about maybe how betrayed you feel, because imagine how betrayed 0:45:28.120 --> 0:45:29.000 I feel. You know. 0:45:30.160 --> 0:45:33.360 Yeah, I think that's like part I mean, I'm. 0:45:33.239 --> 0:45:35.160 Not going to talk about Brian's character and stuff, but 0:45:35.239 --> 0:45:37.400 like I was obviously still and I say this, and 0:45:37.480 --> 0:45:39.400 like my item, I say, like I say this, and like, 0:45:39.560 --> 0:45:41.080 you know, I'm glad that he told me, Like I 0:45:41.120 --> 0:45:43.759 think it's something that I need to know. 0:45:45.400 --> 0:45:47.839 I wish it was sooner than later, but you know. 0:45:48.320 --> 0:45:50.160 Or it happened, I would. 0:45:51.840 --> 0:45:54.680 Yeah, I mean, I you know, I agree with everything 0:45:54.719 --> 0:45:56.920 you're saying. And I think, like one hundred percent everyone 0:45:56.960 --> 0:45:59.560 should have, like if they're feeling betrayed, like think about 0:45:59.680 --> 0:46:01.719 how trade you must feel in that moment, and like, 0:46:01.760 --> 0:46:04.320 I think everyone should have just went with what you said. 0:46:04.400 --> 0:46:07.560 Like at that point, it's like now it is Bailey's world. Motherfuckers, 0:46:07.560 --> 0:46:09.520 Like listen to what I have to say, and that's 0:46:09.960 --> 0:46:12.680 that's gonna be. But the season's not over. For you. 0:46:12.920 --> 0:46:15.919 I hope it turns around because you're lovely and it's 0:46:15.960 --> 0:46:18.640 really uh, it's tough to watch, but I think, uh, 0:46:19.400 --> 0:46:21.000 I think it's gonna be good for you. But what 0:46:21.080 --> 0:46:21.440 do I know? 0:46:22.440 --> 0:46:23.400 Tuning in to see. 0:46:23.400 --> 0:46:26.239 And thank you Bailey for coming on Batchelor Happy Hour. 0:46:26.920 --> 0:46:29.359 Thank you guys, bye, of. 0:46:29.360 --> 0:46:31.520 Course, and thank you to all our listeners. Thank you 0:46:31.560 --> 0:46:33.560 guys for tuning in to Batchler Happy Hour. Make sure 0:46:33.560 --> 0:46:35.360 you download and subscribe to the podcast. 0:46:35.440 --> 0:46:37.879 We'll have new and exclusive interviews coming your way. Thanks 0:46:37.920 --> 0:46:38.400 for listening. 0:46:38.440 --> 0:46:38.960 Bye,