WEBVTT - CZM Book Club: "The Sapling Cage" by Margaret Killjoy 0:00:01.720 --> 0:00:03.320 Cool Zone Media. 0:00:05.640 --> 0:00:10.680 Book Club, book Club, book Club, book Club book Club. 0:00:11.200 --> 0:00:14.400 It's the Cool Zone Media book Club, the only podcast 0:00:14.480 --> 0:00:17.280 where you don't have to do the reading. And usually 0:00:17.440 --> 0:00:20.440 I say, because I do the reading. But this week 0:00:20.480 --> 0:00:23.880 it's going to be different. This week, instead of reading 0:00:23.920 --> 0:00:27.880 to a guest, I found a guest to read to me. 0:00:29.400 --> 0:00:32.879 I found Jackie milash Hi. 0:00:33.600 --> 0:00:33.760 Hi. 0:00:34.760 --> 0:00:40.000 So, Jackie is the narrator of my upcoming book, The 0:00:40.040 --> 0:00:42.720 Sapling Cage. You've probably heard me talking about for the 0:00:42.720 --> 0:00:46.640 past like six months at least or longer. But I thought, 0:00:47.360 --> 0:00:49.840 wouldn't it be fun to read you all a chapter 0:00:49.920 --> 0:00:51.880 of it? And then I thought, wouldn't it be even 0:00:51.920 --> 0:00:55.120 more fun if you all could listen to the person 0:00:55.160 --> 0:00:57.600 who's going to be doing the reading of it in 0:00:57.640 --> 0:01:03.400 your ears? Because Jackie's narrator of the book, So I 0:01:03.400 --> 0:01:06.440 thought she should come on and read you all some 0:01:06.560 --> 0:01:07.040 of the book. 0:01:07.280 --> 0:01:08.960 Well, hell yeah, I'm so glad to be here. 0:01:09.280 --> 0:01:11.160 I usually do like a bio of the author, but 0:01:11.200 --> 0:01:12.559 I'm not going to do a bio of the author, 0:01:12.600 --> 0:01:14.280 but tell us about you really quickly. 0:01:14.760 --> 0:01:19.160 Uh yeah, So I'm I'm like, who am I. It's 0:01:19.160 --> 0:01:21.040 one of those things where like as soon as anybody 0:01:21.120 --> 0:01:23.039 asks me a question and I have all the knowledge 0:01:23.040 --> 0:01:26.240 I have just disappears. I'm a voice actor who specializes 0:01:26.280 --> 0:01:29.399 in audiobook narration. I'm based out of the ann Arbor, 0:01:29.440 --> 0:01:32.160 Michigan area, and I also work out a library part 0:01:32.160 --> 0:01:34.679 time as well, and so it's a cool gig. This 0:01:34.920 --> 0:01:38.320 story meant a lot to me because I am transfeminine myself. 0:01:38.440 --> 0:01:41.360 My pronouns are she, they, and so a lot of 0:01:41.400 --> 0:01:43.840 what's like in the text really really resonated with me. 0:01:44.280 --> 0:01:47.000 And so I was thrilled to be able to narrate 0:01:47.040 --> 0:01:50.160 this title, and I'm thrilled to be here to read 0:01:50.400 --> 0:01:51.960 a little piece of it for you guys today. 0:01:52.360 --> 0:01:52.840 Yeah. 0:01:53.000 --> 0:01:55.040 I had nothing to do with the decision making of narrators, 0:01:55.040 --> 0:01:57.960 but I did get to hear the like audition piece 0:01:58.040 --> 0:01:59.440 and I was like, oh, no, this is going to work, 0:01:59.520 --> 0:02:04.120 this is gonna be right, thank you. So The Sapling 0:02:04.160 --> 0:02:06.560 Cage is a book that I wrote, and it is 0:02:06.640 --> 0:02:09.240 a crossover, which means it's a YA book that knows 0:02:09.320 --> 0:02:12.360 it's going to be read by adults, which did me 0:02:12.440 --> 0:02:14.160 a lot of good. Well, we'll talk about the book 0:02:14.240 --> 0:02:18.480 more at the end after the reading, but instead it's 0:02:18.520 --> 0:02:22.160 called The Sapling Cage. It comes out September twenty fourth, 0:02:22.400 --> 0:02:26.440 twenty twenty four, in both audiobook and print book form, 0:02:26.560 --> 0:02:29.359 and you can pre order either the print or the audio, 0:02:29.520 --> 0:02:33.160 or both if you're feeling spicy. I don't know why 0:02:33.160 --> 0:02:35.200 that's spicy, but you could do it. 0:02:35.639 --> 0:02:35.960 Why not? 0:02:37.280 --> 0:02:41.239 All right, let's hear this amazing story. I've never had 0:02:41.240 --> 0:02:44.160 anyone read me one of my own things before. I 0:02:44.200 --> 0:02:48.640 suppose that is an unusual sort of sensation and feeling. Yeah, yeah, 0:02:48.760 --> 0:02:51.440 especially because it's like a fantasy world full of weird names. 0:02:51.480 --> 0:02:54.280 But you know, sure it's going to be great. Oh yeah, 0:02:54.320 --> 0:02:54.840 I'm excited. 0:02:54.880 --> 0:03:01.200 Hell yeah, all right, all right. One, the alder tree 0:03:01.240 --> 0:03:04.800 was ancient, and its leaves and branches left sunlight dappled 0:03:04.800 --> 0:03:08.440 on the forest floor. It was also dead, and it 0:03:08.480 --> 0:03:12.520 shouldn't have been. Everywhere around us the forest was waking 0:03:12.560 --> 0:03:16.600 from winter. Everything was bluebells and white trilliums and new 0:03:16.639 --> 0:03:20.880 buds on branches and bright green leaves. Everything was spring 0:03:22.080 --> 0:03:26.720 except the alder. Its bark was sharp with cold, like 0:03:26.840 --> 0:03:32.960 ice or like stone. Its leaves were gray. I don't 0:03:32.960 --> 0:03:35.680 think trees are supposed to be like that, Blaine said. 0:03:37.280 --> 0:03:40.160 We'd finished our morning work on the communal fields not 0:03:40.280 --> 0:03:43.200 a hundred yards away through the trees. Horses ran in 0:03:43.240 --> 0:03:46.520 the pasture, excited to be outside after so many months 0:03:46.520 --> 0:03:50.200 of snow. I could smell rain in the air. It 0:03:50.240 --> 0:03:54.120 should have been a perfect day. But the alder was dead, 0:03:54.880 --> 0:04:00.840 and it shouldn't have been. Witchcraft. Lane said. That was 0:04:00.880 --> 0:04:05.240 her explanation for everything strange. It couldn't be the witches. 0:04:05.600 --> 0:04:10.520 I said, that was my defense of everything blamed on witchcraft. 0:04:11.800 --> 0:04:14.880 She paced around the tree. It took her several paces 0:04:14.880 --> 0:04:17.760 for every lap. She was half a year younger than me, 0:04:18.200 --> 0:04:21.760 she'd just turned sixteen, but she was the one always 0:04:21.800 --> 0:04:25.039 trying to burn off extra energy. I peered at the 0:04:25.080 --> 0:04:28.839 frost gathered on the alder's bark. I see another one, 0:04:29.160 --> 0:04:32.720 Laine said. She took off, running further into the forest, 0:04:33.000 --> 0:04:35.839 and I caught up with her a ways away. A 0:04:35.880 --> 0:04:39.520 young pine was dead and cold, its needles gone gray. 0:04:40.440 --> 0:04:44.359 One shattered at the touch of my finger. Who else 0:04:44.440 --> 0:04:49.719 but witches, Lane asked, Trees don't turn cold. Only a 0:04:49.720 --> 0:04:52.760 witch could save it. I said, you'll be able to 0:04:52.760 --> 0:04:59.640 save it. Oh hooray, Lane said, sarcastically. It's not that bad. 0:05:00.839 --> 0:05:03.560 I didn't make that deal. I don't think my dead 0:05:03.560 --> 0:05:07.760 mom's promise she'd mean anything. Layne and I started back 0:05:07.800 --> 0:05:11.960 toward the village. Witches get to wear those black skirts, though, 0:05:12.320 --> 0:05:17.920 I said, and curse people and heal people. I'd rather 0:05:17.960 --> 0:05:20.520 be a knight, you know. I'd rather be a knight. 0:05:21.160 --> 0:05:25.160 Why are you arguing with me about this? That was 0:05:25.200 --> 0:05:28.200 a fair question. I thought it over as we walked. 0:05:29.160 --> 0:05:31.279 If I was a girl, I'd pretend to be you 0:05:31.440 --> 0:05:34.760 and go in your place. I'd always wanted to be 0:05:34.800 --> 0:05:38.520 a witch. It's a shame you aren't a girl, Laine said. 0:05:40.000 --> 0:05:44.840 I agreed, not just because of the witch thing. One 0:05:44.920 --> 0:05:47.719 of my earliest memories was being glad that my name 0:05:47.960 --> 0:05:51.640 Laurel was as common for girls as it was for boys. 0:05:52.360 --> 0:05:54.840 Five years back, my mother had given up trying to 0:05:54.920 --> 0:05:57.960 keep me out of her face, powder and paint. Laine 0:05:58.040 --> 0:06:02.240 had always been gamed to trade clothes with me. Those 0:06:02.279 --> 0:06:05.200 were the only two people in town who I talked 0:06:05.240 --> 0:06:08.279 to about how I should have been a girl. I 0:06:08.360 --> 0:06:13.120 had enough social problems already. When I was little, maybe seven, 0:06:13.600 --> 0:06:15.520 I told my friend River to call me a girl 0:06:15.520 --> 0:06:19.120 instead of a boy, and he just punched me right 0:06:19.160 --> 0:06:22.839 then and there, without thinking about it. My mom thought 0:06:22.839 --> 0:06:25.279 my nose was broke and a traveling witch had to 0:06:25.279 --> 0:06:29.520 set it for me. River apologized, and maybe he even 0:06:29.600 --> 0:06:32.440 meant it that he was sorry, but he'd made it 0:06:32.440 --> 0:06:35.200 seem like the whole thing was my fault, like I'd 0:06:35.320 --> 0:06:41.240 scared him or something. So yeah, only my mom and 0:06:41.400 --> 0:06:45.400 Lane knew about the dresses and the paint. If I 0:06:45.480 --> 0:06:47.839 were a witch, though, I could turn the next person 0:06:47.920 --> 0:06:51.240 like River into a goat, or figure out things like 0:06:51.320 --> 0:06:55.920 why those trees were cold. I'll do it anyway, I said, 0:06:56.160 --> 0:06:58.160 as we walked through the fields of flax and barley. 0:06:59.560 --> 0:07:04.120 What I started talking faster so I wouldn't lose my nerve. 0:07:05.200 --> 0:07:07.080 When the coven comes through to take you, I'll tell 0:07:07.120 --> 0:07:09.200 them i'm you, and I'll go off and learn to 0:07:09.200 --> 0:07:14.320 be a witch. You're a boy, Laine said. Girls are 0:07:14.360 --> 0:07:17.120 allowed to be nights, now, why can't boys be witches? 0:07:17.840 --> 0:07:21.720 And besides, it's not my fault I'm a boy. It's 0:07:21.800 --> 0:07:27.240 still true. I can pretend. Lane walked up next to 0:07:27.280 --> 0:07:30.680 me and threw her arms around my shoulders. What if 0:07:30.720 --> 0:07:35.960 you get caught. I won't get caught, I said. Strangers 0:07:36.000 --> 0:07:39.560 always think I'm a girl. Anyway, My mother and I 0:07:39.640 --> 0:07:43.360 ran the stables. There were more popular roads than Southede, 0:07:43.880 --> 0:07:46.960 and there were more prosperous towns than Ledstone on Southeide, 0:07:47.560 --> 0:07:50.920 but we still saw our share of wayfarers. Most were 0:07:50.920 --> 0:07:53.120 on their way to Port Sac to our east, or 0:07:53.320 --> 0:07:56.520 Deadmond Castle to our west, and most of them had horses, 0:07:56.840 --> 0:08:00.640 and most of them stabled with us overnight. We served 0:08:00.720 --> 0:08:04.840 knights and mercenaries and merchants and brigands. And I was 0:08:05.160 --> 0:08:08.360 just reaching an age where grown men took not a 0:08:08.480 --> 0:08:11.400 small amount of interest in trying to figure out my gender. 0:08:12.520 --> 0:08:15.160 I didn't have even a hint of a beard, my 0:08:15.240 --> 0:08:18.840 shoulders were narrow, and I had my mother's sharp features. 0:08:19.480 --> 0:08:23.840 These are witches, though Lane reminded me, they can see 0:08:23.880 --> 0:08:28.240 more than other people can. Were you trying to talk 0:08:28.320 --> 0:08:33.400 me out of it? I asked no. She squeezed me 0:08:33.440 --> 0:08:37.360 tighter against her side as we walked. I'm just worried. 0:08:38.200 --> 0:08:42.000 What will you tell your dads or your mother. I 0:08:42.040 --> 0:08:45.800 won't tell Grell or Jorge anything. My dad's had a 0:08:45.800 --> 0:08:48.520 home all the way in Port Sac. I lived with 0:08:48.559 --> 0:08:50.400 them every autumn for a month or so. When the 0:08:50.440 --> 0:08:53.880 storms kept them on land most of the year. I 0:08:53.920 --> 0:08:57.040 didn't hear from them, and their only contribution to my 0:08:57.160 --> 0:09:01.680 upbringing was the silver they sent my mother when they could. Mom, 0:09:01.679 --> 0:09:07.400 though she'll understand, I love it like I love the Baron, 0:09:07.920 --> 0:09:11.360 my mother said when I told her, that was about 0:09:11.360 --> 0:09:14.880 as close as she came to cursing. She sure didn't 0:09:14.920 --> 0:09:19.160 love Baron, need no one did. She sat in her 0:09:19.240 --> 0:09:21.760 rocking chair, a clay mug of wine in her hand. 0:09:23.000 --> 0:09:25.800 I'd waited until after supper to tell her, because she 0:09:26.160 --> 0:09:30.120 never took news well on an empty stomach. I didn't either, 0:09:30.200 --> 0:09:33.360 come to think of it, she took a long draw 0:09:33.440 --> 0:09:38.600 of the mug. You're old enough to make your own mistakes. 0:09:39.760 --> 0:09:43.400 After that, she didn't say anything at all, which was 0:09:43.840 --> 0:09:46.800 kind of worse than her yelling at me. Really, it 0:09:46.920 --> 0:09:49.760 left me with nothing to do but stand around there 0:09:49.800 --> 0:09:51.599 was only one good chair on the porch of the 0:09:51.640 --> 0:09:54.920 stable house and come to my own conclusions about why 0:09:54.960 --> 0:09:58.560 it was a bad idea. I didn't want to do that, 0:09:59.320 --> 0:10:02.480 I'd made up my so I tried not to linger 0:10:02.520 --> 0:10:04.280 on what the witches might do to me if they 0:10:04.320 --> 0:10:09.920 found out, or what nights sometimes did to witches. I'll 0:10:09.920 --> 0:10:14.880 get to learn magic, I said, real magic. Cauldrons and curses, 0:10:14.960 --> 0:10:19.000 and maybe I'll even learn how to fly. What is 0:10:19.040 --> 0:10:23.040 it that you think witches do? They travel around doing 0:10:23.080 --> 0:10:26.600 good things? I said, they help some people and hurt 0:10:26.640 --> 0:10:30.680 some people, depending on what they deserve. That's what you 0:10:30.720 --> 0:10:34.720 want to do, help some people, hurt other people. Since 0:10:34.760 --> 0:10:38.720 when have you liked hurting people? I don't know, mom, 0:10:39.160 --> 0:10:44.480 since never. I guess it was my turn to grow quiet. 0:10:45.320 --> 0:10:49.319 I'd probably learned that trick from her. The cicadas were 0:10:49.320 --> 0:10:52.880 out and early too, filling the air with their rising 0:10:52.960 --> 0:10:56.000 and falling song. The town drunk said it was going 0:10:56.040 --> 0:10:58.600 to be an irrational year, one of those years where 0:10:58.640 --> 0:11:00.640 the seasons don't do it, there's a host to and 0:11:00.840 --> 0:11:05.280 crops fail. No one paid him over much heed, But 0:11:05.520 --> 0:11:10.120 the cicadas really shouldn't have been out just yet. There's 0:11:10.160 --> 0:11:13.760 no way to disguise yourself, my mom said, breaking the silence, 0:11:14.520 --> 0:11:18.120 not forever. You don't look at now, but you're going 0:11:18.120 --> 0:11:21.560 to grow into a man by then. I bet I'll 0:11:21.559 --> 0:11:25.560 have magic enough to hide it. I said, I won't 0:11:25.600 --> 0:11:30.160 hear the end of it, never, not from Grell. When 0:11:30.200 --> 0:11:33.000 she invoked my birth father's name, I knew that was 0:11:33.080 --> 0:11:37.200 basically the end of it. She'd given up. I was 0:11:37.240 --> 0:11:40.880 my mother's child through and through, and she knew I 0:11:40.920 --> 0:11:45.240 didn't care what Grell thought. I hadn't inherited anything from Grell, 0:11:45.320 --> 0:11:48.080 but skin half a shade darker than my mother's olive. 0:11:49.840 --> 0:11:53.400 This is it, then, she said. She poured the dregs 0:11:53.440 --> 0:11:55.560 of her wine off into the grass, honored the dead, 0:11:55.960 --> 0:11:59.480 as she did with every coup. The cavin is going 0:11:59.520 --> 0:12:01.679 to be by soon enough, and you're going to lie 0:12:01.679 --> 0:12:04.440 to them, and you'll learn to be a witch. Not 0:12:04.520 --> 0:12:09.439 a sailor, not a knight, not another's forbid, a stable master, 0:12:10.559 --> 0:12:16.840 but a witch, my son, a witch. I nodded, grinning. 0:12:18.280 --> 0:12:21.959 She hadn't stopped me. I knew deep in my heart 0:12:21.960 --> 0:12:24.720 that if it was truly a terrible idea, my mother 0:12:24.760 --> 0:12:28.480 would have tried harder to stop me. What's Laine going 0:12:28.520 --> 0:12:30.640 to do while you're off being her? She want to 0:12:30.720 --> 0:12:33.839 learn how to run a stable. She's going to be 0:12:33.920 --> 0:12:39.400 a knight. Of course, she is my mom's side. I 0:12:39.480 --> 0:12:42.240 knew she wasn't happy about me leaving. I knew she 0:12:42.280 --> 0:12:45.160 wanted someone to care about the stables, about Ledstone the 0:12:45.200 --> 0:12:50.040 way she did. But that wasn't me. It wouldn't have 0:12:50.080 --> 0:12:53.560 done anyone any good for me to pretend otherwise. But 0:12:53.640 --> 0:12:56.400 if you want to pretend to care about things, you 0:12:56.440 --> 0:12:59.720 could pretend to care about the advertisers that support the 0:12:59.720 --> 0:13:02.600 pot guests that you run, much like I'm doing right now. 0:13:03.520 --> 0:13:18.720 Here's some ads yang capitalism and rebec. 0:13:23.160 --> 0:13:26.760 Witches don't really keep proper schedules, but most years they 0:13:26.760 --> 0:13:29.960 made their way down southeat around Mother's May, the spring holiday. 0:13:30.840 --> 0:13:33.520 I figured I had about a week to repare myself. 0:13:34.880 --> 0:13:37.480 The witches didn't know Lane by name. They were just 0:13:37.520 --> 0:13:40.040 coming for the daughter of Leona of the Lead, now 0:13:40.040 --> 0:13:44.040 that she'd seen sixteen years. I started sleeping over at 0:13:44.080 --> 0:13:46.880 the Lead manor in case they came at night. The 0:13:46.960 --> 0:13:50.960 house was a decrepit shell, really, the rock walls overgrown 0:13:51.000 --> 0:13:55.079 with vines and half the lumber taken to rot. Laane 0:13:55.160 --> 0:13:57.839 did what she could to maintain it, but she'd live 0:13:57.880 --> 0:14:01.240 there alone for three years. She spent most of her 0:14:01.320 --> 0:14:04.480 days working the communal fields, and hadn't the skills or 0:14:04.600 --> 0:14:09.560 resources for serious repairs. The manner was a shadow of 0:14:09.600 --> 0:14:13.560 its former glory. That manner dead manner. Lane called it 0:14:13.760 --> 0:14:18.320 rhyming the name. A few hundred years ago Lane's ancestors 0:14:18.320 --> 0:14:21.240 had founded the town to mine. Lad then sworn fealty 0:14:21.320 --> 0:14:25.200 to some baroness or baron. Serfs moved in, and those 0:14:25.200 --> 0:14:27.760 who weren't mining took to farming on the communal fields. 0:14:28.600 --> 0:14:32.040 One hundred years back, collectivisation had swept through the Lowlands, 0:14:32.320 --> 0:14:35.560 and the baron had allowed it Rather than lose power completely. 0:14:37.000 --> 0:14:39.760 Lane's family stayed richer than most of the rest of us, 0:14:39.960 --> 0:14:44.040 but only through trade and inheritance. They no longer ruled, 0:14:44.200 --> 0:14:47.080 and they no longer took tax. Only the baron did 0:14:47.120 --> 0:14:51.320 either of those things. By Lane's mother's time, the family 0:14:51.520 --> 0:14:55.840 barely had enough to maintain the ancient manner. The first 0:14:55.960 --> 0:14:58.800 night I spent there waiting for the witches, Lane led 0:14:58.800 --> 0:15:02.120 me up treacherous stairs to her parents' old living quarters. 0:15:02.480 --> 0:15:05.160 We had to pick our way carefully across the sagging 0:15:05.200 --> 0:15:08.680 floor in the lamplight. I'm going to bring this place 0:15:08.720 --> 0:15:12.080 back to glory, Lane said, tugging her shirtsleeve free from 0:15:12.120 --> 0:15:15.920 a protruating nail. I'll be the first night protector Letston's 0:15:15.960 --> 0:15:19.760 hat in fifty years. You really think you'll come back, 0:15:20.200 --> 0:15:25.440 I asked, you won't. I mean I'll visit my mom, 0:15:25.880 --> 0:15:31.360 I said, sometimes we could use a village witch, Lane said, 0:15:32.080 --> 0:15:34.440 Just think of this place with a night protector and 0:15:34.640 --> 0:15:39.280 a village witch. Too much world to see, I said, 0:15:40.280 --> 0:15:42.160 since I'd made up my mind to join the witches, 0:15:42.480 --> 0:15:46.440 I'd spent half my time waking and asleep imagining all 0:15:46.480 --> 0:15:50.120 the things I was off to see and do. We 0:15:50.160 --> 0:15:52.800 stopped before a heavy cherrywood wardrobe set in the corner 0:15:52.840 --> 0:15:56.520 of the master bedroom. Its hinges were faded brass, but 0:15:56.680 --> 0:16:01.720 gold filigrees still gleamed eternally bright along the doorpan. Before 0:16:01.800 --> 0:16:04.680 Lane's mother died, she had always kept us out of 0:16:04.720 --> 0:16:09.840 this room. After Lane's mother died, Lane herself had solemnly 0:16:09.880 --> 0:16:14.960 told me that this wardrobe was off limits. Lane selected 0:16:14.960 --> 0:16:17.120 an iron key hung on a chain from her belt 0:16:17.400 --> 0:16:20.440 and held it aloft so we might appreciate the seriousness 0:16:20.520 --> 0:16:27.880 of the moment. You ready, she asked. I nodded. I 0:16:27.880 --> 0:16:33.360 could scarcely wait. She opened the wardrobe. Black skirts and 0:16:33.440 --> 0:16:37.840 dresses hung from hooks. Stockings woven in intricate patterns lay 0:16:37.840 --> 0:16:42.360 in a pile. Jewelry finely crafted from plain materials, glittered 0:16:42.400 --> 0:16:46.480 beneath the glass lid of an ebony box. I'd studied 0:16:46.480 --> 0:16:48.760 at the loom enough to know the long days it 0:16:48.800 --> 0:16:51.080 took to weave a few yards of flax or wool. 0:16:52.120 --> 0:16:57.120 This was the accumulated wealth of a life. My mother 0:16:57.200 --> 0:16:59.240 left pretty clear instructions for when I left to join 0:16:59.240 --> 0:17:02.880 the Witches. Lane said I was to bring a short dress, 0:17:03.040 --> 0:17:06.560 a long dress, a warm cloak, a winter skirt, and 0:17:06.680 --> 0:17:09.879 three pairs of stockings. So pick out whatever you'd like 0:17:12.359 --> 0:17:18.040 my own dress. I would have my own dress, two 0:17:18.080 --> 0:17:22.160 of them. Even. I spent most of an hour making 0:17:22.160 --> 0:17:25.119 my decision, modeling each garment in front of the mirror 0:17:25.119 --> 0:17:28.560 on the inside door of the wardrobe. Not even Leona 0:17:28.600 --> 0:17:30.919 of the lad had ever owned a smooth glass mirror, 0:17:31.320 --> 0:17:35.679 so my image was distorted. That suited me fine. It 0:17:35.760 --> 0:17:39.280 let me imagine how I ought to look. I let 0:17:39.320 --> 0:17:42.240 my hair down out of its top knot long and 0:17:42.320 --> 0:17:46.560 straight and black. It framed my face well. I'd have 0:17:46.600 --> 0:17:50.320 worn it down all the time if I could. Though 0:17:50.320 --> 0:17:52.919 I was much taller than Lane, I was nearly the 0:17:52.960 --> 0:17:56.520 same size as Leona had been. Most of the dresses 0:17:56.520 --> 0:17:59.159 sat funny across my chest since I had nothing to 0:17:59.160 --> 0:18:02.080 fill them out, and even fewer of them were loose 0:18:02.160 --> 0:18:05.080 enough across the hips to hide the bulge between my legs. 0:18:05.720 --> 0:18:08.119 But in the end I found two that fit me 0:18:08.400 --> 0:18:12.000 just right. Both were high waisted, which made my legs 0:18:12.040 --> 0:18:16.000 look longer and my torso shorter. One linen, one wool. 0:18:17.680 --> 0:18:23.400 When I wore those dresses, I couldn't stop smiling. You're beautiful, 0:18:23.880 --> 0:18:29.080 Lene said, she was smiling too. She thought for a moment, 0:18:29.320 --> 0:18:32.400 then dug through the wardrobe. She pulled out a necklace, 0:18:33.840 --> 0:18:36.800 A black stone pendant hung from a delicate steel chain. 0:18:38.000 --> 0:18:41.480 She held it out to me. No one in town 0:18:41.560 --> 0:18:46.080 had anything so nice. Your mother didn't say anything about 0:18:46.119 --> 0:18:51.880 taking any jewelry, I said, she's dead. Take it as 0:18:51.880 --> 0:18:55.560 I thank you. I took it and put it on. 0:18:57.000 --> 0:18:59.919 It hung just above the low neckline of the long dress, 0:19:00.280 --> 0:19:05.160 the stone cool and comforting against my chest. Despite how 0:19:05.200 --> 0:19:07.600 I was born, I was going to get to be 0:19:07.640 --> 0:19:11.640 a witch, despite how I was born, I was going 0:19:11.680 --> 0:19:16.760 to get to live as a woman. Lane squeezed me. 0:19:17.520 --> 0:19:22.040 She was crying into my neck. Thank you, she whispered. 0:19:23.480 --> 0:19:30.399 Of course I started crying too. I slept in my 0:19:30.480 --> 0:19:33.280 long dress that night. I wanted to get used to 0:19:33.280 --> 0:19:36.960 wearing it, and also I just didn't want to take 0:19:37.000 --> 0:19:40.119 it off. I slept in one of the empty rooms 0:19:40.119 --> 0:19:44.639 in the manner. A windstorm howled outside, and branches cracked 0:19:44.640 --> 0:19:49.400 in the distance. I dreamt about a witch with translucent skin. 0:19:50.840 --> 0:19:53.520 I saw her skull and her veins and her teeth 0:19:53.800 --> 0:19:57.280 like I was looking through foggy glass. She was a 0:19:57.320 --> 0:20:00.480 real woman, a real witch who'd wandered through town when 0:20:00.520 --> 0:20:03.760 I was an infant. I dreamt about her ever since. 0:20:05.440 --> 0:20:08.560 That night though I was a witch, and the glass 0:20:08.600 --> 0:20:11.919 faced Witch was with me, next to me, tied to 0:20:11.960 --> 0:20:15.399 me with thick hemp rope. We were in a boat. 0:20:16.560 --> 0:20:19.600 Hands lifted us out of the boat and threw us overboard, 0:20:20.040 --> 0:20:24.240 and we sank, and I was drowning, tied the glass 0:20:24.240 --> 0:20:24.879 faced witch. 0:20:26.400 --> 0:20:31.240 And if you want to survive drowning in a sea 0:20:31.320 --> 0:20:35.320 of choices, nothing can save you except having those choices 0:20:35.359 --> 0:20:40.200 made for you already, by choosing what to buy based 0:20:40.200 --> 0:20:45.280 on what advertises on your favorite show, like these advertisers. 0:20:46.000 --> 0:21:03.480 Here they are. And Rebecca Mother's may came and went 0:21:03.600 --> 0:21:06.800 with no sign of the coven, no word from anyone 0:21:06.840 --> 0:21:10.560 passing through either, though of course I had to be 0:21:10.680 --> 0:21:15.760 careful with my inquiries. Witches weren't beloved everywhere across Seacon. 0:21:16.720 --> 0:21:21.080 None of the baronies outlawed witchcraft outright, but not everyone 0:21:21.200 --> 0:21:25.880 knew and appreciated the social utility of witchcraft, and very 0:21:25.920 --> 0:21:28.159 few of the knightly brotherhoods would raise a hand or 0:21:28.160 --> 0:21:32.200 a sword to protect witches. Some knights saw witches as 0:21:32.200 --> 0:21:35.879 a threat to their power and haunted them. If I 0:21:36.000 --> 0:21:39.160 told the wrong knights we were expecting witches, I might 0:21:39.240 --> 0:21:43.480 even get them killed. Most of the news was talk 0:21:43.560 --> 0:21:47.320 of strife. Far to the north, Duchess Helta had pressed 0:21:47.320 --> 0:21:51.400 some ancient and dubious claim and annexed some baron's holdings. 0:21:52.760 --> 0:21:57.479 The news felt impossibly distant. I tried to make myself 0:21:57.600 --> 0:22:00.440 useful at the stables, but as the days were or on, 0:22:00.720 --> 0:22:05.200 I got more and more anxious and distracted. One day 0:22:05.359 --> 0:22:08.160 I forgot to fasten a buckle, and a passing merchant 0:22:08.200 --> 0:22:12.080 fell from her horse and injured her back. After that, 0:22:12.480 --> 0:22:14.679 my mother told me it was about time she got 0:22:14.800 --> 0:22:17.720 used to running the place alone anyway, which left me 0:22:17.840 --> 0:22:22.159 with too much time to worry. What would witches do 0:22:22.359 --> 0:22:25.879 to an impostor would they kick me out, turn me 0:22:25.920 --> 0:22:30.280 into a sow, or kill me. They'd probably just kicked 0:22:30.320 --> 0:22:35.480 me out. Maybe my mother took to eating dinner with 0:22:35.560 --> 0:22:39.040 us at Lane's house, particularly after she fired me, and 0:22:39.119 --> 0:22:43.760 I spent more of my time baking and cooking. Five 0:22:43.880 --> 0:22:46.919 days after Mother's May, I was reaching my breaking point. 0:22:48.240 --> 0:22:50.639 We ate on the back porch where the overgrown garden 0:22:50.760 --> 0:22:54.080 kept away prying eyes, and I wore my short dress. 0:22:54.840 --> 0:22:58.200 The sun was just below the horizon. We were mopping 0:22:58.240 --> 0:23:00.199 up the last of a turnip and barley soup with 0:23:00.280 --> 0:23:03.960 fresh baked bread, and I just couldn't keep my feelings 0:23:03.960 --> 0:23:09.440 cooped up anymore. I give up, I said, this waiting. 0:23:09.600 --> 0:23:12.760 It's going to kill me, or the witches will kill me, 0:23:13.000 --> 0:23:16.399 or people will kill me for being a witch. Better, 0:23:16.440 --> 0:23:19.280 I just give up. I'll go be a sailor or 0:23:19.280 --> 0:23:24.600 something instead. Sailors see the world too. Laine looked up, 0:23:24.960 --> 0:23:27.440 her brown eyes just starting to go wide with fear. 0:23:28.600 --> 0:23:32.680 If I backed out, the coven would take her instead. 0:23:33.640 --> 0:23:35.880 You can do anything you want with your life, Laurel, 0:23:36.280 --> 0:23:40.280 my mother said. I always knew a lecture was coming 0:23:40.320 --> 0:23:43.600 when she used my name. And I don't wish you 0:23:43.640 --> 0:23:46.320 were off to be a witch. But you made a 0:23:46.359 --> 0:23:51.520 promise to Lane. I didn't say I promise, I said, 0:23:52.520 --> 0:23:54.440 as soon as the words came out of my mouth, 0:23:54.880 --> 0:23:59.520 I regretted them, saying, you promise isn't the only way 0:23:59.600 --> 0:24:04.560 to promise. Yes, it's okay, Laine said, it was nice 0:24:04.560 --> 0:24:07.320 of you to offer, but if you back out, it's okay. 0:24:09.600 --> 0:24:12.000 I didn't like my mom being mean to me, and 0:24:12.080 --> 0:24:15.720 I didn't like Lane being nice to me. I didn't 0:24:15.760 --> 0:24:19.879 like much of anything at all. The Bloodston bell told 0:24:20.480 --> 0:24:24.800 twice the Ledstone bell rang once for friendly knights and 0:24:24.840 --> 0:24:28.160 merchants come to town, twice for friendly brigands and witches 0:24:28.200 --> 0:24:31.560 and other people the baron didn't approve of three times 0:24:31.560 --> 0:24:35.320 for royalty, and cacophonously for any of the above who 0:24:35.320 --> 0:24:39.440 looked like they might stir up trouble. Never mind, I said, 0:24:39.560 --> 0:24:44.120 standing up, I'll do it upstairs with you. My mother 0:24:44.160 --> 0:24:46.920 said to Lane, out of sight, you look too much 0:24:46.960 --> 0:24:52.480 like your mother. Laane darted over and hugged me. She 0:24:52.560 --> 0:24:54.720 pulled back to look at me like she was trying 0:24:54.760 --> 0:24:58.080 to say something. Then she gave up, shook her head, 0:24:58.480 --> 0:25:02.439 and ran into the house. Are you going through with this, 0:25:02.960 --> 0:25:07.240 my mother asked. I stood up straight, smoothed out my dress. 0:25:08.560 --> 0:25:14.400 Of course, I said, I made a promise. My arms 0:25:14.400 --> 0:25:17.280 shook uncontrollably at my side as I walked to the 0:25:17.320 --> 0:25:19.880 center of town, and it was all I could do 0:25:20.040 --> 0:25:24.919 to concentrate on my breathing. We have come for the 0:25:25.000 --> 0:25:26.000 daughter of Leona. 0:25:26.040 --> 0:25:26.560 Of the lead. 0:25:28.480 --> 0:25:30.760 Five witches stood shoulder to shoulder in the center of 0:25:30.800 --> 0:25:34.800 the town square. My whole childhood, I'd wanted to know 0:25:34.840 --> 0:25:38.720 about witches. It was always hard to separate rumor from truth, 0:25:39.080 --> 0:25:41.920 but I knew a few things. I knew that every 0:25:41.960 --> 0:25:44.440 full fledged witch was the other's equal. For one thing, 0:25:46.040 --> 0:25:48.480