Speaker 1: Well, I invited you here, thought I made myself perfectly clear.
Speaker 1: When you're a guest to my home, you gotta come
Speaker 1: to me empty. And I said, no, guests, your presences
Speaker 1: presents enough. I already had too much stuff.
Speaker 2: So how did you dare to surbey me? Welcome to?
Speaker 2: I said, no gifts. I'm Richard Wineger. Ah, we're in
Speaker 2: the backyard. It is raining enough to set a mood,
Speaker 2: but not enough to flood my home, which is kind
Speaker 2: of my sweet spot. And hopefully we'll just continue with
Speaker 2: that and you know, hydrate things without you know, devastating
Speaker 2: me for the next three months. We'll see what happens. Oh,
Speaker 2: we can't get into me talking about my house flooding.
Speaker 2: I mean that was half of the podcast last year.
Speaker 2: We're going to try to be light with it. Let's
Speaker 2: get into the podcast. I love today's guest. It's Brian Sophy. Brian,
Speaker 2: welcome to. I said no gifts.
Speaker 3: First of all, Bridger, your backyard is so beautiful. Do
Speaker 3: you ever talk about how beautiful it is?
Speaker 2: Thank you? Well, first of all, thank you, I don't personally,
Speaker 2: I do appreciate the backyard. Guests will comment, well, they
Speaker 2: will admire it. They'll say something about the backyard.
Speaker 3: Can I get something off the bat really quick?
Speaker 2: Please?
Speaker 3: I know you don't watch this because you're like a
Speaker 3: high brow personal.
Speaker 2: Well I may surprise you very soon.
Speaker 3: Okay, have you watched The Traders? Of course, why you're
Speaker 3: not on that show beyond me based on how fancy
Speaker 3: you I mean honestly, like, I feel like you would
Speaker 3: be so good.
Speaker 2: Well up the prize amount and all considerate. That's my
Speaker 2: not enraw money, you know what. Not it's sound like
Speaker 2: an asshole, it's not. I think it sounds like an asshole.
Speaker 2: Let's talk about this realistically. Two hundred and fifty thousand dollars.
Speaker 2: That's a lot of real money, but it's not a
Speaker 2: lot of game show money. Survivor has been giving people
Speaker 2: a million dollars for the last thousand years.
Speaker 3: It's one twenty five at the end of it. I
Speaker 3: mean you're paying half in taxi here.
Speaker 2: Of course, if and you may be splitting it.
Speaker 3: You might be splitting it even more than one way, right, Yes,
Speaker 3: and this is a.
Speaker 2: Game show produced by a major you know, studio network. Yes,
Speaker 2: it's not some It's not like Family Feud at three
Speaker 2: pm with.
Speaker 3: Like a high production value and like a real star
Speaker 3: hosting right, Yeah.
Speaker 2: In that the two hundred and fifty thousand dollars makes
Speaker 2: no sense.
Speaker 3: It makes no sense. And then not to mention, everyone's
Speaker 3: going to think you're so loaded after that that all
Speaker 3: your family's going to come out of the woodwork. I mean,
Speaker 3: there's just no getting ahead whinning even if you win.
Speaker 2: When they're like really going for the games and trying
Speaker 2: to get the money, I'm like, it's not that the
Speaker 2: stakes are not here. I would be so lazy.
Speaker 3: I wouldn't even do I fast forward through them. Honestly,
Speaker 3: I get there is.
Speaker 2: Just the games. The show is essentially this. A third
Speaker 2: of it is watching people come through a door while
Speaker 2: kind of like picking at breakfast.
Speaker 3: A gorgeous breakfast, full breakfast.
Speaker 2: But picking And we'll talk about the Australian version. I've
Speaker 2: watched a lot of show you I've watched the show
Speaker 2: A full Breakfast on Australia.
Speaker 3: I do, but I don't like the table and chairs
Speaker 3: and the looks horrible. It looks like a backroom in
Speaker 3: a church. It's like a rat exactly awful.
Speaker 2: Yes, Then there's the third of the show, which is
Speaker 2: the most convoluted games they start explaining the rules, and
Speaker 2: I'm just in another place completely. It's like coming up.
Speaker 2: It feels like a game you've come up with when
Speaker 2: you're in about seven and you just keep saying and then,
Speaker 2: and then and then exactly. You get to a point
Speaker 2: where like, w how do you win? Right? What is this?
Speaker 3: You're putting me on a fucking Ferris wheel upside down
Speaker 3: to answer questions about talking about like.
Speaker 2: What are those meetings? Like how do you even begin
Speaker 2: with those games? Idea?
Speaker 3: And my least favorite thing it make speak cringe every
Speaker 3: time is when they like when they get to where
Speaker 3: the three of them are meeting, like whoever many trainers are,
Speaker 3: and they d they take the hood.
Speaker 2: Off and they look at each other and they go.
Speaker 3: Like breathe. So embarrassing.
Speaker 2: I also want to know, well, I would ruin the
Speaker 2: show for me, but like the actual production part of
Speaker 2: that is it? Like how do they keep them a
Speaker 2: secret from the rest of It's like I.
Speaker 3: Don't actually know, because I was like, oh, there must
Speaker 3: all be staying somewhere else, and then they drive them
Speaker 3: back to the castle. Oh, even so, I still don't
Speaker 3: know how they would.
Speaker 2: Say, Oh, that sounds like a giant hassle it does,
Speaker 2: and then yeah, I feel like there's got to be
Speaker 2: people start noticing. I guess not yeah, but yeah, the
Speaker 2: prize amount is not from it.
Speaker 3: But I would love to see you on there if honestly,
Speaker 3: Peacock kick up the prize money so that I can
Speaker 3: watch Bridger on the show kill it.
Speaker 2: I want to be in that castle. That would be fun.
Speaker 2: Although can I say something, Yeah, it feels like I
Speaker 2: got a recent remodel buy someone without a lot of taste.
Speaker 3: I'm going to say this, it's a lot of wayfair
Speaker 3: in there. Yes, it's clearly and it looks old, but
Speaker 3: you know, it's like the sick you said on any
Speaker 3: of those things. The leather's going to break, you know
Speaker 3: what I mean, It's just it's just gonna slit. It's
Speaker 3: all splittable furniture.
Speaker 2: I would not be surprised if those wood floors were laminate.
Speaker 2: No me neither, which is crazy that it's this ancient castle.
Speaker 2: No no, no no. Yeah.
Speaker 3: Like the chandeliers are beautiful, I'll give them a right.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but it's very chip and Joanna went through it
Speaker 2: without thrilled to look at that. But look, I'd take
Speaker 2: the trip. Yeah. Oh, yeah, but I am going to
Speaker 2: be just kicking back and watching other people do the trials.
Speaker 3: The game did take a three and a half week
Speaker 3: trip to Scotland a few years ago. I took my
Speaker 3: mother for her seventieth birthday. It was a classic adult
Speaker 3: son mother trip. It was full of dignity and I
Speaker 3: really kept my composure of the whole time. I'm sure
Speaker 3: it was great. But we did see some of those
Speaker 3: magnificent castles. They really really are stunning.
Speaker 2: There are so many of these. I mean, I haven't
Speaker 2: been there, but no, it's like they have.
Speaker 3: By the way, they have like twenty five legit, twenty
Speaker 3: five thousand locks for a country that big, that's how many.
Speaker 2: Likes California has a single pond.
Speaker 3: Just the reservoirs. They're not even exactly.
Speaker 2: It's like a concrete exactly nasty pool.
Speaker 3: The La River is a bed of concrete. Yeah, but
Speaker 3: we saw those castles and they were really really stunning.
Speaker 2: Twenty five thousand locks. Yeah. Did you get to see
Speaker 2: the lock Nest.
Speaker 3: The Loch Nest, the Loch Lomond. We saw a few
Speaker 3: of them. We drove through a bunch of.
Speaker 2: Okay, is lock ness the biggest or is it just
Speaker 2: the most famous.
Speaker 3: It's the most famous, and I think it's the deepest.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, which makes sense, which makes.
Speaker 3: Sense, like where's he gonna hide or she? But Loch
Speaker 3: Lomond I think is the biggest by land, by see,
Speaker 3: by water.
Speaker 2: And those bodies of water. Because I grew up in Utah,
Speaker 2: which is a desert. Yeah, and I live in la
Speaker 2: which is also a desert. Whenever I see something that's
Speaker 2: bigger than like an Olympic sized swimming pool, I can't
Speaker 2: imagine that it's not the ocean.
Speaker 3: Same No, I mean, it just seems like I grew
Speaker 3: up in Olpaso, the desert.
Speaker 2: Oh, it's wild to see like what other places consider
Speaker 2: a lake, because where we come from, a lake is
Speaker 2: nothing barely anything. Were you from?
Speaker 3: So are you from something?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Right outside of something like so I've never seen
Speaker 2: that lake. Oh that's very big. Actually, yea smells terrible often.
Speaker 3: Why do people's why is it because.
Speaker 2: Of the now I'm going to say something that's at
Speaker 2: the brine. I think the brine, Yeah, I believe that's true.
Speaker 2: And they're like a little shrimp in it.
Speaker 3: So does it smell oceany?
Speaker 2: No, it smells there's something called like, no, I again,
Speaker 2: I'm speaking about something I don't quite know about, Okay,
Speaker 2: but you it's like occasionally hear about the lake effect,
Speaker 2: which is a horrible smell in the air god, which
Speaker 2: is kind of like a did we just hear like
Speaker 2: a what was that? That was neither human nor beast?
Speaker 2: That was something in between that was very strange. I
Speaker 2: hopefully listener got a peak of that. But no, the
Speaker 2: lake effect smells kind of sulfury.
Speaker 3: Okay, great, because I guess it's not moving.
Speaker 2: Right, it's just kind of it's like the Dead Sea. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I wonder if the Dead Sea gets a similar thing.
Speaker 3: I think it has a horrible smell.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they I think great Salt like used to be
Speaker 2: kind of like Utah's beach destination and like the twenties,
Speaker 2: people would go out and float to the race. But
Speaker 2: you go there now you're like, I'm not touching that.
Speaker 3: That's like the Sultan Sea here. I've never been to it, right,
Speaker 3: It used to be like a resort town and then
Speaker 3: suddenly it started smelling horrible and so everyone stopped going there.
Speaker 3: But like the signs are still there from the sixties, Oh,
Speaker 3: which would be cool. It's eerie like like women in
Speaker 3: those like really almost full coverage bikinis.
Speaker 2: Oh yes, of course, yeah, very flat right, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: I believe the salt and Sea. And I think that
Speaker 2: happened was because like they started, Uh again, why do
Speaker 2: I keep talking about water sources? Like I know, but
Speaker 2: I believe every word. I think they kind of cut
Speaker 2: off the source of fresh water in that town or
Speaker 2: something like to diverted to La Okay and then the
Speaker 2: town went bust and now it's this haunted swamp essentially.
Speaker 3: So wild too, because it's like, why drive forty five
Speaker 3: minutes to the ocean when you can drive forty minutes.
Speaker 3: This man made.
Speaker 2: Lake exactly makes no sense whatsoever. And just to wrap
Speaker 2: up with the Great Salt like what we're to continue
Speaker 2: talking about, and this is again I this podcast, people
Speaker 2: are no longer tuning in for facts or for certified facts, right,
Speaker 2: and that's fine. My name Bridger comes from a mountain
Speaker 2: man named Jim Bridger, who I believe was the first
Speaker 2: like white person to discover the Great Salt Lake. And
Speaker 2: then it gets kind of embarrassing because he thought it
Speaker 2: was the Pacific Ocean, right, so it must be very big. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's very I mean, I think it's big enough that
Speaker 2: if you're lazy, you're not going to, you know, go
Speaker 2: all the way around it. So my namesake is kind
Speaker 2: of humiliating.
Speaker 3: It is unbelievable how so many of the people who
Speaker 3: wrote history wrote it off first and.
Speaker 2: Russians this must be it. Nobody check, nobody check.
Speaker 3: I'm not going to check.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I made it here, I'm not don't need to
Speaker 2: do anything else. Oh, okay, you went to Scotland a
Speaker 2: few years ago. You were traveling recently, I was. I
Speaker 2: was in.
Speaker 3: I did the Tour de mont blank, which is like
Speaker 3: you kind of hiked through the French, Italian and swissups
Speaker 3: around my avid hiker and so I was. And then
Speaker 3: I sort of was based out of Paris around that.
Speaker 3: So I was gone for like a month and a half.
Speaker 3: That's incredible. And then well then the sound strike happened,
Speaker 3: and I remember I was about to buy a watch.
Speaker 3: I literally jumped over the counter, grabbed my credit card,
Speaker 3: ran out of there and booked a flight back home
Speaker 3: because I was like, I don't this doesn't none of
Speaker 3: this seems smartening one.
Speaker 2: I'm in free fall exact. Well, let's talk about some
Speaker 2: low lights of the trip. What were some low lights
Speaker 2: for you? Okay? Of the one it sounds so beautiful
Speaker 2: and incredible. It was beautiful. It was incredible.
Speaker 3: And I have to say we were crossing the border
Speaker 3: between in the mountains between Italy and Switzerland and there
Speaker 3: was this group of young German like twelve guys men
Speaker 3: and they were all started singing, oh, they're like German
Speaker 3: national anthem.
Speaker 2: It.
Speaker 3: It was very unnerving to be honest with you, because
Speaker 3: and there weren't nice boy.
Speaker 2: It was like oh v stubis, oh you know what
Speaker 2: I mean?
Speaker 3: It was that is very unnerving.
Speaker 2: Were they in similar dress?
Speaker 3: I have just hiking here, but we had to climb
Speaker 3: over this ice thing after that, and they kept making
Speaker 3: fun of me, specifically because they said I was going
Speaker 3: too slow and I was this is a good quote though,
Speaker 3: a scared American so retrous at the time, I was sweating,
Speaker 3: so scared, just like, oh god, oh god. But then
Speaker 3: a scared American was felt pretty pretty accurate.
Speaker 2: It sure, so that felt good to be bullied in
Speaker 2: the Alps exactly. Germans should know that they need to
Speaker 2: have a softer touch with this sort of thing. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and these guys didn't.
Speaker 3: And actually a couple of them did have like slipping
Speaker 3: and falling, so that was a little bit of some slapstick,
Speaker 3: a little Keystone cops just modern times, I mean, just
Speaker 3: the classics, you know what I mean. The got Harold Lloyd.
Speaker 3: It was great. So that was a low light. Oh
Speaker 3: we did stay in so there are these little inns
Speaker 3: you stay in along the way.
Speaker 2: Oh I love this. This it was and they would
Speaker 2: cook for you to night.
Speaker 3: It was gorgeous, except one of them for I don't
Speaker 3: know what reason, because it was just in I think
Speaker 3: this was still in the French Alps. Was a pac
Speaker 3: Man themed.
Speaker 2: I was going to say like a Mexican restaurant.
Speaker 3: No, but it was all like robot and arcade game theme.
Speaker 2: It was a barcade.
Speaker 3: It was a barcade. It was wary, and it was
Speaker 3: in the middle of nothing, and it was very strange
Speaker 3: and it felt like you were in I mean, it
Speaker 3: was clearly like one person's vision, but like the carpet
Speaker 3: had like vision pellets, do you know what I mean?
Speaker 3: But pac Man eats and it wasn't even misspac Man.
Speaker 3: It was like regular pack. So that was like an.
Speaker 2: Audix and it was a place you stayed at yeah,
Speaker 2: we stayed there. I mean like I had Circus Circus.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it felt exactly like Circus Circus, and that night
Speaker 3: I had like I mean it was like casino food,
Speaker 3: you know what it was like. It was like chicken
Speaker 3: tenders and like disco fry. It was so strange.
Speaker 2: That makes zeros. It made no sense.
Speaker 3: And they were like this is the only in around here,
Speaker 3: and I'm sort of like, okay, I mean I guess
Speaker 3: like I don't know these inns.
Speaker 2: Are you like just stumbling upon them as you or
Speaker 2: do you book them on? Oh? Yeah, you're booked.
Speaker 3: I went with like a guided group and there were
Speaker 3: like eight people. Okay, so I wasn't really left to
Speaker 3: my own.
Speaker 2: Devices for so you were just pac Man?
Speaker 3: Was it pac Man or Bust?
Speaker 2: Yeah? And there were actual arcades there.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, it truly I'm trying to think. It felt
Speaker 3: sort of like a bar in Union Square, do you
Speaker 3: know what I mean? Like there used to be more
Speaker 3: called Lemon Bar. They used to It was just all
Speaker 3: these NYU Right. I don't know if you're it's still
Speaker 3: allowed to stay Bridge and Tunnel, but that was so
Speaker 3: it felt like that idea, right, yeah, like going out
Speaker 3: it's like going to Lucky Strike or whatever. In Hollywood,
Speaker 3: it's like bowling out.
Speaker 2: Like a weird artificial sitting that nobody really enjoys.
Speaker 3: Right, except at least here, you're like, oh, this is
Speaker 3: what Hollywood is. There you're not thinking this is what
Speaker 3: the alpuit.
Speaker 2: It feels like it came from through a portal or something.
Speaker 2: It's like and rehality. It's very odd. Wow. But the
Speaker 2: rest of the inns were okay.
Speaker 3: The rest of them are okay. I mean there were
Speaker 3: there were highs and lows which each of them, but
Speaker 3: but the rest of them were okay.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was a nice trip. And how long total
Speaker 2: were you hiking? It was twelve days twelve Like it
Speaker 2: was hard waking up and then going to bed after
Speaker 2: hiking every single one of those days.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you would hike for like ten hours, twelve hours.
Speaker 3: It was crazy.
Speaker 2: Wow.
Speaker 3: Also with summer, so like no one was going to bed.
Speaker 3: I will say one other low light. I went on
Speaker 3: a couple of hinge dates and Paris, okay, and they
Speaker 3: were really eye opening because they immediately just started insulting
Speaker 3: you because you're American, which I by the way, I
Speaker 3: like that Paris is a tough place for chorist because
Speaker 3: I feel like it's one of the only places where
Speaker 3: they still expect you to really try, and.
Speaker 2: When you succeed, it's like, wow, oh my god, it's
Speaker 2: such a thrill.
Speaker 3: But these guys were each of them sort of did
Speaker 3: the same thing where they were like, you are so cullious,
Speaker 3: like it's so funny how you uh want to talk
Speaker 3: before we fuck? And here we fuck before we talk,
Speaker 3: and I'm like, well, I met you on hinge and
Speaker 3: I don't know you. And then a lot of them
Speaker 3: were really into this idea of like defend terrible people,
Speaker 3: like we can't tell you what yellen every friendship right
Speaker 3: now exactly, And I was like, you can, I'm not
Speaker 3: comfortable doing it and they're like, no, you're so precious
Speaker 3: with soles and it's.
Speaker 2: Like, you don't know me for such a miserable first
Speaker 2: date someone with this aggressive attitude.
Speaker 3: Each of them were just everything I said was oh
Speaker 3: American America and you know all this.
Speaker 2: So that was either of the dates and decently are
Speaker 2: you in touch with either of these people?
Speaker 3: One of them after the no.
Speaker 2: Good for you.
Speaker 3: One of them after the date was like, I forget
Speaker 3: what holiday it might have been best steel day actually,
Speaker 3: and for that you want to lock yourself inside because
Speaker 3: it's like it gets wild and people throw shit and
Speaker 3: it's crazy. But this guy invited me after our date
Speaker 3: to a party and so we went there and he
Speaker 3: was like, don't worry, everyone speaks English and I was like, oh,
Speaker 3: it doesn't matter. I'm the outside of here.
Speaker 2: So we go up.
Speaker 3: No one spoke a word of English to me and
Speaker 3: my friends is not that good. And he was like,
Speaker 3: they speak English, they just don't want to. And I'm like,
Speaker 3: you got me.
Speaker 2: It's the most boring Frank show of all time.
Speaker 3: Correct, Because then I just left.
Speaker 2: That's not a bad idea for if you ever get
Speaker 2: pranked on a show to just turn around and walk away.
Speaker 2: I'm not interacting with this anymore. No, forget, You're not
Speaker 2: getting me. So those are my low lights.
Speaker 1: Wow?
Speaker 2: And did you have a heavy backpack on the whole time?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 3: I mean I sort of boogied out a little bit.
Speaker 3: Those our bags would be like driven to the ends
Speaker 3: each night. You would have just had like day packs.
Speaker 2: This is very reality show. It was very reality pa
Speaker 2: driving your things?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Did you picnic? Yes? Oh that sounds one.
Speaker 3: And this is why it was nice to have a
Speaker 3: guide because they just knew these spots that no one
Speaker 3: else right love and they were stunning. Each one was stunning.
Speaker 3: And then you would get the like cheese from the
Speaker 3: dairies in the mountains, and it was it was incredible.
Speaker 2: The lines from the pac man bar, wines from.
Speaker 3: The pack manbar, absolutely, the pellets from the carpet, it
Speaker 3: was just amazing.
Speaker 2: I need to look this. That sounds absolutely hard.
Speaker 3: The name if I can find it. Yeah, it was wild.
Speaker 2: Wow. Well, look there's something else we need to talk about. Yeah,
Speaker 2: of course I was excited to have you here today. Yeah,
Speaker 2: Brian Sophy, wonderfully. He's so lovely, he's so funny. How
Speaker 2: could it possibly go wrong? Oh? God, you know, I
Speaker 2: thought he'll come, we'll chat, catch up, he'll go on
Speaker 2: his way, right, So I'll say I was a little
Speaker 2: surprised you come kind of sloshing up here in the
Speaker 2: rain into my backyard holding Uh what is what? I
Speaker 2: suspect a gift or a paper purse.
Speaker 3: Could be a paper purse, it could be a harlequin
Speaker 3: sleeping place for a tiny doll.
Speaker 2: It's a doll like coffin. It is it is well
Speaker 2: I assume this is a gift and the podcast is
Speaker 2: I know I couldn't. I said, no gift. I know
Speaker 2: you did. Oh I fucked up? Okay, Well, I like
Speaker 2: the immediate ownership of the mistake, you know, repentance. All
Speaker 2: of this is very important. Should I open this here
Speaker 2: on the podcast, I would listen.
Speaker 3: You might as well keep humiliating me, So yeah, I say.
Speaker 2: Go for it. Okay. As we said, it's in kind
Speaker 2: of like a tall probably Barbie height.
Speaker 3: Bag Barbie and like more of a brats do all
Speaker 3: to be honest.
Speaker 2: Yeah, brat Barbie would probably go to about here this is,
Speaker 2: and it's like got the space for a brat's head,
Speaker 2: that's right. I measure everything in dull length and headsize. Okay,
Speaker 2: and it's kind of a colorful ing.
Speaker 3: This is a two fer.
Speaker 2: It's the order matter, no does not. Okay, So we'll
Speaker 2: take the tissue and we're reaching.
Speaker 3: Someone's going to pleasure themselves to that later, you know,
Speaker 3: just playing it over and over and over louder and
Speaker 3: loud back fifteen seconds, back, fifty second.
Speaker 2: Your neighbors just hear this crinkling someone outside their cars, Like,
Speaker 2: what are they listening? What's going on in there. Okay,
Speaker 2: I'm pulling something out first. Okay, wait ooh a dry shampoo,
Speaker 2: A bumble and bumble dry shampoo.
Speaker 3: That's right, Bridger. Now, this was a real journey for
Speaker 3: me in twenty twenty.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 3: I became obsessed with two things QBC okay, and building
Speaker 3: out my earthquake kit to the point that I became
Speaker 3: so obsessed that I started filling it out with everything
Speaker 3: I thought I might need. And one of the last
Speaker 3: stops was canisters of dry shampoo to say, that are
Speaker 3: in my earthquake closet that I got for a.
Speaker 2: Steal on QVC.
Speaker 3: Oh you got them from QB Coors. Yeah, but I
Speaker 3: ordered a generator. I mean they were all into like
Speaker 3: full pre pandemic happening, and then prepping was a natural extension.
Speaker 2: Wow.
Speaker 3: And that's when I really came into the QVC thing. Now,
Speaker 3: I only lasted about six months watching QVC.
Speaker 2: It's a decent amount of time.
Speaker 3: It was a decent amount of time. I would watch
Speaker 3: it for like an hour every night. I loved it,
Speaker 3: and I would be excited to see what the deals were.
Speaker 3: But I tuned in a lot for like the prepper stuff. Now,
Speaker 3: the bumble of the bubble dry shampoo was not a
Speaker 3: prepper not advertising.
Speaker 2: It'st a prepper thing. They should have been.
Speaker 3: I thought, how am I going to shampoo my.
Speaker 2: Hair right, especially like during the water Wars crap?
Speaker 3: Exactly. Yeah, so you know, so that was that. Wow.
Speaker 2: So what was the first thing you got on QBC
Speaker 2: during your Yeah it was meal kits? Okay, meal kits
Speaker 2: like that was actual, right, survival kits. Shit.
Speaker 3: So I have a bunch of them. Do you know
Speaker 3: they last fifty years?
Speaker 2: Fifty? Yeah, I wonder what they're like at year forty nine.
Speaker 3: I know, you know what, I'm going to look at
Speaker 3: my receipt. No, I bought them in twenty twenty and
Speaker 3: twenty sixty nine. Oh, you'll have me back.
Speaker 2: Around to mark it down. Mark it down.
Speaker 3: Well, will split a meal and we'll see what we think.
Speaker 2: About a light, some candles. We'll get out this almost
Speaker 2: expired prepper meal, correct, and we'll review it. Do you
Speaker 2: know what's in them? No?
Speaker 3: I think it's just a lot of like just add
Speaker 3: water kind of stuff.
Speaker 4: Right.
Speaker 3: But I got breakfasts, lunches, dinners. I mean, I'm it's
Speaker 3: going to be I mean, eggs literally all of that. Wow,
Speaker 3: and like and a generator got like a little like
Speaker 3: a mini generator.
Speaker 2: How long are these prepper kits? What is the term
Speaker 2: the earthquake kid?
Speaker 3: I guess this is what we call it. But those
Speaker 3: are just the backpacks.
Speaker 2: But yeah, okay, the meals, like how many days are
Speaker 2: they supposed to last?
Speaker 3: You?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 3: So it depends on how many you order. I'm trying
Speaker 3: to remember how many I or I think I got
Speaker 3: like six months worth or something like that.
Speaker 2: That's a decent amount of food.
Speaker 3: It's a lot of food. I mean literally, an entire
Speaker 3: walking closet is my earthquake closet. I mean I can't
Speaker 3: walk in it anymore. That's I have watered that last
Speaker 3: fifty years.
Speaker 2: You're going to be You're going to be like the
Speaker 2: president of the Wasteland. You're going to have so much power.
Speaker 2: But here's the problem, and I think you'll agree with me. Actually,
Speaker 2: if we survive, whatever, do you really want to be
Speaker 2: around the people who are ready? Because they scare the
Speaker 2: absolute me. They were the scariest of the scary.
Speaker 3: So I might survive, but I'm not sure I want
Speaker 3: to around other people prepper culture, preppers.
Speaker 2: This for me is always the thing where I'm like,
Speaker 2: you watch a post apocalyptic movie whatever, I think, just
Speaker 2: kill me day one. Yeah, what, I don't want to
Speaker 2: do any of that, mean neither.
Speaker 3: If Jurassic Park happened, I would they were like, here's
Speaker 3: a gun, defend yourself. I would shoot myself in the face.
Speaker 2: I'm not going to see the mistake, but it would happened.
Speaker 3: Exactly. Yeah, you hold, No, I don't want to be
Speaker 3: around for stuff like that.
Speaker 2: No, what is there to live for? Nothing? Especially if
Speaker 2: the TV doesn't work exactly and I don't want anything
Speaker 2: to do with it. I'll wait for the battery to
Speaker 2: die on my phone and then kill me right exactly.
Speaker 2: That's all I need.
Speaker 3: No, all I want in this world is culture. And
Speaker 3: so once that's over, like I'm done.
Speaker 2: Yes, I will say, having grown up Mormon, there's a
Speaker 2: very preparedness culture with built Mormonism. They're very like be
Speaker 2: ready for big emergencies. And why is that? Specifically? Do
Speaker 2: you think there's like a vague like the world could
Speaker 2: end or like you know, something serious could happen and
Speaker 2: you've got to live through it. But I don't feel
Speaker 2: like they ever. Yeah, they don't really explicitly say like
Speaker 2: it's going to be doomsday, right, But they don't give dates, right,
Speaker 2: They kind of encourage you to have canned goods and
Speaker 2: the sort of thing, which there's there's no problem with that.
Speaker 2: I mean the beginning of the pandemic, I was like, oh,
Speaker 2: I own a box of cereal, right.
Speaker 3: Apparently someone told me that all you really need food
Speaker 3: wise is just go to like cost or whatever and
Speaker 3: just get a bunch of peanut butter because it lasts forever,
Speaker 3: and it's like has all the fat you need.
Speaker 2: It's like a good and it tastes great. Again, it
Speaker 2: tastes until you get to like jar ninety right. I
Speaker 2: wonder what that feels like. But I would I mean,
Speaker 2: I could live for weeks just with a spoon and
Speaker 2: some peanut butter easily. But again, I think I probably
Speaker 2: have a third of a thing of peanut butter right now. Yeah.
Speaker 3: I mean, by the way, my food supply for emergencies
Speaker 3: is a lot, none of it I actually want to taste.
Speaker 3: You know, I'm not going to be living the high life.
Speaker 2: So, okay, you've got the Prepper kits on QVC. What
Speaker 2: other purchases were made on QVC?
Speaker 3: Yeah, this was not this part was not in this.
Speaker 3: I'm just going through the thing in my mind. I
Speaker 3: have a toilet with bags that like you it's a
Speaker 3: toilet seat, okay, that's on top of the bucket, okay.
Speaker 3: And then there are these bags. You put them in
Speaker 3: and they like vacuum seal and then you throw them out.
Speaker 3: Whoa that was I'm going crazy. First, I have a
Speaker 3: bunch of tarps. I have duct tape, dry shampoo, A
Speaker 3: ton of sunscreen.
Speaker 2: That's a good one, A ton of feel like sunscreen
Speaker 2: expires it does. Yeah, yeah, but you know some of
Speaker 2: these ends of days you're like, well, I'll give it
Speaker 2: a shot and then I'll just get a deep tan.
Speaker 3: But I'm truly disgusted with myself that some of my
Speaker 3: first thoughts in earthquake preparedness were but how am I
Speaker 3: gonna look?
Speaker 2: I can't age.
Speaker 3: This sounds the number one aging.
Speaker 2: I need to have flawless skin through the end of
Speaker 2: the world.
Speaker 3: Skin, A ton of like uh soap, okay, a shampoo, wow,
Speaker 3: regular shampoo, stuff like that, and then also like rolls
Speaker 3: of duct tape tarps. In case your window blows out,
Speaker 3: you get a tarp, you duct tape and over.
Speaker 2: Right, you know, what I mean those things any kind
Speaker 2: of weaponry.
Speaker 3: Well, no, okay, my dad is a hunter and all
Speaker 3: he wants in this world is to buy me a gun.
Speaker 2: Right. Of course, I'm in a very similar territory.
Speaker 3: Okay, right, So occasionally when I go home, my dad
Speaker 3: will be like, I just need to run an errand
Speaker 3: at what is this store? I forget. It's called academy.
Speaker 3: It might just be in Texas.
Speaker 2: It's called Academy. That's the name of it. That sounds yeah, right,
Speaker 2: it's not. It's a literally.
Speaker 3: It does. Yeah, it's not that sheep. But he's always like,
Speaker 3: let's buy a gun. Let's bag gun. And then one
Speaker 3: year I was like, I don't want a gun, but
Speaker 3: I do want a weapon. So he bought me and
Speaker 3: I ended up not accepting it because I was like, ah,
Speaker 3: he bought me a like police grade flashlight. So it
Speaker 3: blinds you and then it has spikes on the end
Speaker 3: of it. You're supposed to blind someone and then like
Speaker 3: bludging them, but that is brutal. I can't do it.
Speaker 3: So he got me this and I was like, ah, no, oh,
Speaker 3: my god, I should have accepted.
Speaker 2: What does that look like?
Speaker 3: I mean, it really is just like a round thing
Speaker 3: with a bunch of spy. I mean it could. It
Speaker 3: looks like something that like a mistress, you know, like
Speaker 3: an off flash verry steampunk. Wow, exactly.
Speaker 2: Bye.
Speaker 3: So I don't really have any weapons except for like
Speaker 3: a kitchen knife.
Speaker 2: Right, a rolling pin, a rolling pin.
Speaker 3: I don't even have a baseball bat. That would probably
Speaker 3: be Yeah, you could get.
Speaker 2: A baseball bat. Yeah, I need to get a rolling pin.
Speaker 2: Why don't I own a rolling pin? That's cheek as hell?
Speaker 2: Yeah you know what I mean.
Speaker 3: Yes, you just have a spatch and a rolling pin.
Speaker 2: Them with it turn around from like rolling the pie
Speaker 2: dough and just crack their skulls, right, Yeah, I don't.
Speaker 2: I don't think I own a single thing that would
Speaker 2: count as a weapon in my home. I'm defenseless.
Speaker 3: I have a rolling pin, and I have kitchen knives.
Speaker 2: That's about it.
Speaker 3: Can get a taser, yeah, you get a taser. That
Speaker 3: would be more harmless than other things, you know.
Speaker 2: That's like, But I'm always like, what if though I
Speaker 2: get out of control? What if I suddenly just want
Speaker 2: to tase someone's I have access to the taser.
Speaker 3: That's the thing I feel like we're everyone is a
Speaker 3: hair away from.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's pulling the tasing a kind old woman exactly right,
Speaker 2: just for the thrill.
Speaker 3: Just for the thrill, just so I could get just
Speaker 3: is there anything to laugh at anymore? Have weeks everything
Speaker 3: at this point that could do it?
Speaker 2: Yeah? So I I actually I do have like a
Speaker 2: go kit, a go bag. Oh yeah, well that's good,
Speaker 2: which was just basically given to me by someone moving
Speaker 2: to New York. So otherwise I wouldn't own and I
Speaker 2: have no idea what's in it? I guess.
Speaker 3: The other thing that's good to know is where your
Speaker 3: closest red cross is. Oh, and it might be closer
Speaker 3: than you think, because they don't really a lot of
Speaker 3: them don't even really have signs.
Speaker 2: Oh interesting, They kind of just keep it to themselves. Yeah, yes, so,
Speaker 2: and what what do they have to offer? Are they
Speaker 2: like a I don't know, I truly have no idea advice.
Speaker 3: I think you go there and they're like you could stay.
Speaker 3: I don't know, I really don't know.
Speaker 2: What do they do? Would be they would like try
Speaker 2: to recruit me to help.
Speaker 3: I know exactly, I'm not doing that a sudden, I'm
Speaker 3: ringing a bell somewhere.
Speaker 2: I'm all good.
Speaker 3: Were you ever in a choir or anything.
Speaker 2: No, I can't sing.
Speaker 3: Did you ever see the Tabernacle choir saying, Actually.
Speaker 2: That's a really good question. I have to believe I
Speaker 2: did at some point, probably for like a Christmas thing
Speaker 2: or something. I feel like, maybe I'm just imagining this.
Speaker 2: I think at some point Angela Lansbury sang with them.
Speaker 3: I don't doubt. I mean, aren't they the best choir
Speaker 3: in the country.
Speaker 2: Maybe I don't know, we can say the world's probably
Speaker 2: the world.
Speaker 3: No, I think you can.
Speaker 2: And I feel like yearly they'll like bring in a
Speaker 2: celebrity to make sense born with them or something. And
Speaker 2: I feel like maybe I just wanted to see Angela
Speaker 2: with the choir. I bet she did it, but I
Speaker 2: saw them in something like that. Did you ever see them? No?
Speaker 3: But my entire family is like obsessed. They are, Oh
Speaker 3: my god, my grandparents every holidays, I mean, the albums
Speaker 3: were always out and my grandparents did and my parents did.
Speaker 3: I hosted my parents and my sister for the holidays
Speaker 3: this year. It was every night we were blasting that
Speaker 3: on the Blue Nacle Choir every night. What I dare
Speaker 3: anyone here to listen to the first Noel by the
Speaker 3: Mormon Tabernacle Choir and not sob your brain's eye, it's stunning,
Speaker 3: it's so beautiful.
Speaker 2: I like, I think growing up you like within Utah,
Speaker 2: you just don't even really think about it because it's
Speaker 2: just part of culture or whatever. And then as a
Speaker 2: gay teen you resent and then it's just like I
Speaker 2: don't want anything to do with this thing, right, but
Speaker 2: I wonder what it would be like to listen to
Speaker 2: it now. I feel like choirs and that sort of
Speaker 2: thing I can never really get into. It's just like
Speaker 2: this is too much. I know, it is a lot.
Speaker 2: It's just too many voices.
Speaker 3: Look, do I listen to them when my parents don't
Speaker 3: request it?
Speaker 2: Now?
Speaker 3: I'm not seeking out very many choirs.
Speaker 2: Are they on Spotify? They are? They are? Yeah?
Speaker 3: They are yeah?
Speaker 2: Interesting? Yeah, yeah. I don't know. There's something about a
Speaker 2: choir that it is just almost like wallpaper to me,
Speaker 2: where it's just like it's not mused. And my apologies
Speaker 2: to the choir that all the choirs listening to the podcast,
Speaker 2: you're not music again, You're simply not music. You're noise.
Speaker 2: It is it is very much like background noise here, right,
Speaker 2: It's like almost ambient, Yes, and there's nothing wrong with
Speaker 2: a little ambiance.
Speaker 3: Oh, but I want to see you play the Tabernacle
Speaker 3: choir before a date the invite them over. It's very sexy.
Speaker 2: After the tissue crumpling. Those are the two. Yeah, I
Speaker 2: just maybe I'll try to give that a chance, just
Speaker 2: to see how I feel about listening to eighty senior
Speaker 2: citizens singing. Right, it's a I mean, that's a cutthroat,
Speaker 2: well probably not cut throats, very high stakes.
Speaker 3: Are you kidding me? I've googled and their audition process,
Speaker 3: not because I want to, but I was just whatever.
Speaker 3: They were playing NonStop in my house when my parents
Speaker 3: were here. They love it so and they're very clear
Speaker 3: about it. They're like, auditions are open to anyone, but
Speaker 3: we are incredibly discerning and it is not an easy process.
Speaker 2: I mean they really wait, are they open to outside
Speaker 2: of Mormonism? Oh? That that I don't know.
Speaker 3: You're right, but maybe I didn't. But it didn't say
Speaker 3: specifically you need to be Mormon, but that that be
Speaker 3: just inherently.
Speaker 2: Of course you're surprised to be more. It's right there
Speaker 2: in the title. Interesting. Yeah, I can't imagine. It feels
Speaker 2: almost like getting into college or something. I think you
Speaker 2: really have to go through it. Yeah, piano teacher. I
Speaker 2: think maybe rip her husband was in it, and maybe
Speaker 2: a neighbor was in it, and it takes it over
Speaker 2: your life. It's like a career. Right. Do they get
Speaker 2: paid Probably.
Speaker 3: Not, Probably not a lot. I think it's an honor
Speaker 3: to be here.
Speaker 2: An honor to be there, an honor to be able
Speaker 2: to perform with Angela Lansberry or whatever Broadway person they
Speaker 2: bring in. Wow, I have never heard of anyone being
Speaker 2: into the Mormon Tabernacle choir.
Speaker 3: Yeah, my family historically, I mean, and I can't say
Speaker 3: historically very into it.
Speaker 2: I mean. Back to shampoo for a minute. What's your
Speaker 2: shampoo routine?
Speaker 3: Okay, I have a few shampoos, well, non shampoos. I
Speaker 3: got into twice weekly. A scrub okay, oh, a scrub.
Speaker 3: This is the thing now is scalp scrub? It could
Speaker 3: all be bullshit.
Speaker 2: It just kind of good. We go through cycles of
Speaker 2: haircare bullshit, that's right, So this is probably the latest one.
Speaker 3: Well, I got it as a gift and then I
Speaker 3: just started buying it. But like a scalp scrub with
Speaker 3: and then you put like a scalp mask on. After
Speaker 3: this is all in the shower and it feels very nice.
Speaker 3: And then other than that, I use like what am
Speaker 3: I using right now? I think, oh, right now, because
Speaker 3: I also got this as a gift, I'm doing like
Speaker 3: an ASoP shampoo conditioner set.
Speaker 2: How often?
Speaker 3: Not that often?
Speaker 2: Okay, you're not supposed to, I know.
Speaker 3: I think probably I washed my hair two or three
Speaker 3: times a week. Maybe three times a week, okay, not often.
Speaker 2: Enough though, two or three times a week I think
Speaker 2: is too much? Oh is it? I think once a week? Okay,
Speaker 2: maybe once every two weeks. Is that what you're doing? Yeah,
Speaker 2: you've really nice. I mostly just thank you. I mostly
Speaker 2: just condition because.
Speaker 3: I read something recently that said you wash your hair
Speaker 3: when it's like literally dirty, right, like there's mudd in
Speaker 3: a right. But otherwise just condition it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because you know you're getting in the shower at
Speaker 2: least once a day and like technically washing. Yeah, but
Speaker 2: no one, I think no one will ever truly know.
Speaker 2: I think it's one of these great unknowns, no one
Speaker 2: will ever know. Yes, exactly, those are our two great
Speaker 2: human myths that we can't quite pin down. Yeah, so
Speaker 2: I'm very infrequent, but I've never dry shampooed.
Speaker 3: Well, it's essentially just baby powder. So if your hair
Speaker 3: looks oily and you don't want to shampoo it, kind
Speaker 3: of spray this in and then work it in with
Speaker 3: your fingers and then it just it looks like your
Speaker 3: hair is not oily, but not.
Speaker 2: It doesn't like make your hair white. No. Oh, interesting, Now, yeah,
Speaker 2: I have such dry hair that I feel like it's
Speaker 2: never really an issue. Yeah, some people, I feel like
Speaker 2: it's greasy after six hours.
Speaker 3: I have to say this though, This next gift I
Speaker 3: want you to use, but I also don't want you
Speaker 3: to use.
Speaker 2: It's the flashlight with a weapon exact.
Speaker 3: I want you to use it, not on man. This
Speaker 3: next gift was my the last thing I bought on QBC.
Speaker 2: Oh, I cannot wait.
Speaker 3: This wasn't necessarily in the prepper kit, but it could
Speaker 3: have been because I haven't even touched it.
Speaker 2: And now when you say this was the last thing
Speaker 2: I bought on QVC, was like, this was the last
Speaker 2: thing I bought like a bad experience.
Speaker 3: Or it wasn't a bad experience. I just thought to myself,
Speaker 3: this is it's enough, Like this is this is something
Speaker 3: I never would have done in any other life. But
Speaker 3: the six months on QVC.
Speaker 2: Okay, let's get it out there.
Speaker 3: I became so entranced with this brand. I bought so
Speaker 3: much stuff from this brand, and this was the last
Speaker 3: thing I bought.
Speaker 2: Okay, here we go.
Speaker 3: Okay, that's part.
Speaker 2: Of wait oh okay, because I have no idea. This
Speaker 2: looks like a small beanie to me, it's like just
Speaker 2: it's amazing. Okay, it's a mint. Okay, Yeah, here's the
Speaker 2: next thing. Let's see. Oh yeah, a self tanning serum
Speaker 2: from Josie Moran.
Speaker 3: Is I think it's Josie Maren Josie Moron. She fully
Speaker 3: she is so compelling on QBC. She is so real,
Speaker 3: which means she's not because I mean the whole gimmick
Speaker 3: there is.
Speaker 2: You have to be talking to your friends right right now,
Speaker 2: someone alone in their home, so beautiful.
Speaker 3: And she went to caves in South America. She's the
Speaker 3: only one who discovered this cave. And there's an oil.
Speaker 2: She's the Jim Bridger of this cave.
Speaker 3: There's an oil. She's practically Margaret Mead. There's an oil
Speaker 3: in this cave wo that she discovered and she's been
Speaker 3: able to bottle it as she's the only one who
Speaker 3: can do it.
Speaker 2: What was she doing in this cave? Is she regularly
Speaker 2: in caves?
Speaker 3: Listen, there are a lot of holes in the story. Okay,
Speaker 3: but she went in this cave and she said it
Speaker 3: is a miracle, bra look at my skin. So of
Speaker 3: course I bought the oil. Broke out immediately that I'm
Speaker 3: saying it doesn't work on some But I didn't stop
Speaker 3: there because I was like, oh, maybe it's too strong.
Speaker 3: Buy it in her body lotion.
Speaker 2: So I did that.
Speaker 3: Then I bought it in her body serum, did that,
Speaker 3: Then I bought it in her body cream covered in hives.
Speaker 3: Had to stop doing it. But my last stop was
Speaker 3: this self tanner because she just made me feel like,
Speaker 3: if I do this, people will think I'm at the
Speaker 3: beach every day. People will think I went to the
Speaker 3: cave and then you know what I mean. And then
Speaker 3: went to a resort after I never touched it and
Speaker 3: never use it never, And that was it. Well, that's
Speaker 3: the other thing. You can pay an installment. This was
Speaker 3: like thirty five dollars and I paid him Forest installments.
Speaker 2: Your credit score is for exactly.
Speaker 3: I was like, well why not? It's the pandemic like
Speaker 3: no one's making the money they should make. I yeah,
Speaker 3: which was it was so stupid.
Speaker 2: I'll never do it again by giving this to me
Speaker 2: on this podcast. I now have to try the self tanker.
Speaker 2: I want you to do. This is going to look
Speaker 2: very pale and you're beyond it would look wild. I
Speaker 2: look like I live in a cave. You do, So
Speaker 2: this is going to be fascinating. Yeah.
Speaker 3: I would go online for the directions.
Speaker 2: Okay, and the MIT works with the product.
Speaker 3: Yes, so you kind of like, uh oh, you kind
Speaker 3: of just gently rubb smear it on right all over
Speaker 3: your face even I think it's just for your body. No,
Speaker 3: I think it's for your face.
Speaker 2: You're going to do it to my entire body, to
Speaker 2: my neck, your neck, and then it's going to look
Speaker 2: like I'm wearing a strange orange like lycra.
Speaker 3: Yeah, get as trumpy and as you can.
Speaker 2: Wow, I'm very curious about this. Now, this woman went
Speaker 2: to a cave. Is she kind of like Chas Deine adjacent?
Speaker 2: If people aren't familiar with Chasdeine, He's all over billboards
Speaker 2: in Los Angeles, that's right. And then its hair.
Speaker 3: He made hair products that made people's hair fall out.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, which is incredible, incredible, incredible, and it didn't
Speaker 2: ruin him.
Speaker 3: No, the billboards are still there.
Speaker 2: He still looks Chasdeine.
Speaker 3: You know, I gotta say, because when he came out,
Speaker 3: he was such a product of that time of like
Speaker 3: what people were. This is right, remember when like hairstylists
Speaker 3: were briefly getting famous. Oh yeah, like the guy who
Speaker 3: did Jessica Simpson and all these people were making getting
Speaker 3: reality shows.
Speaker 2: Even that was a period there. He was very specific,
Speaker 2: very they wanted to know the people behind the hair
Speaker 2: or we thought we thought we didn't.
Speaker 3: Because that was also Yeah, it was like everyone loved
Speaker 3: Jessica Simpson's there obviously, Jennifer Anderson's all this stuff, and
Speaker 3: these guys were like it was very odd. But Chasdeine
Speaker 3: is one of these people.
Speaker 2: Chesdeine, and he's still out there. Is Chas's real name
Speaker 2: do we know? Or his name like Darren? It has
Speaker 2: to not be chesdy Chestein is too like to sounds
Speaker 2: so show busy. At least, what do you think is
Speaker 2: a real name? Is Charles Warren Boylin.
Speaker 3: That's a much nicer name.
Speaker 2: That's the name of a CPA. It is, that's true.
Speaker 2: So you can see why he would do that with
Speaker 2: his such.
Speaker 3: Chaz has highlights, Chez absolute and Dan or whatever. Boilin
Speaker 3: does not have highlights.
Speaker 2: No, no, no, it's like your father's friend exactly. Okay, well,
Speaker 2: I've got this self tanning serum. Have you ever used
Speaker 2: any self tanning serum?
Speaker 3: One time I got a spray TND because I was
Speaker 3: supposed to be like shirtless in the show that I do, right,
Speaker 3: and so everyone was like, oh, you're gonna get a
Speaker 3: spraysn right, So so I did. And I guess if
Speaker 3: I had to do something like that again, like if
Speaker 3: I had for television, I guess I would. It does
Speaker 3: make a difference. Actually, right, I would never do it
Speaker 3: for kicks.
Speaker 2: The spray tan experience. What walk me through this?
Speaker 3: It's like air brushing. They have like a pump. Oh,
Speaker 3: you're just in your underwear.
Speaker 2: It's not a machine.
Speaker 3: Well, it is sort of a machine.
Speaker 2: You're like in a booth.
Speaker 3: Yeah, and you're a person. Do it to me, but
Speaker 3: you don't have to. You should just walk in and
Speaker 3: they do it for you. When I guess they get
Speaker 3: it even but it sort of smells and then you
Speaker 3: have to wait twelve hours before you wash it off, okay,
Speaker 3: and then the tan stays for like a week or something,
Speaker 3: maybe longer.
Speaker 2: Those twelve hours. Are you like leaving stains on things? Yeah,
Speaker 2: you could be.
Speaker 3: I think, Yeah, you're supposed to wear loose clothing.
Speaker 2: Loose clothing, and then what do you have to have
Speaker 2: someone drive you home? It's just like no surgery.
Speaker 3: You can drive yourself phone. That's the best part.
Speaker 2: Okay, But I'm worried about the upholstery in your car.
Speaker 3: I know I naturally have to wear long loose clothing,
Speaker 3: probably like you know, something black or dark. Yeah, how interesting,
Speaker 3: like a really long That's the thing I realized. Also,
Speaker 3: I don't really have much long loose clothing, like I'm
Speaker 3: not a sweatpants person.
Speaker 2: Really a nightgown exactly, or like you know, whatever rain,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna do it.
Speaker 3: I would have loved to do that.
Speaker 2: Next time, curlers in my hair.
Speaker 3: Next time, I'm getting my beautiful lace trimmed flannel to
Speaker 3: the ankle's nightgown to the tanning riff and back.
Speaker 2: Absolutely. Oh what a bizarre thing. Yeah, that's really interesting.
Speaker 2: And is what it? Just chemical?
Speaker 1: That?
Speaker 3: Well, I guess there's organic one. That's the one I
Speaker 3: got which is supposed to be less chemically, but I
Speaker 3: don't know what any of it means.
Speaker 2: Right, is it like, are you immediately tan or does
Speaker 2: it like flip? You're immediately not like a magic trick.
Speaker 2: You're immediately tan, but it's not the full effect yet.
Speaker 2: You're a little bit your tones a little bit you know,
Speaker 2: tan or but you're not at the full effect. And
Speaker 2: then when you wash it off.
Speaker 3: It's sort of like I think it breaches its peak
Speaker 3: if I remember quickly like day three or four, stays
Speaker 3: there for.
Speaker 2: A while, Okay, then you start to slowly fade like
Speaker 2: a yellowish orange white.
Speaker 3: But if you really want it off, like when I
Speaker 3: was done shooting, I really wanted it off, So I
Speaker 3: took like ten showers that day, and.
Speaker 2: It was like, yeah, just scrubbing, scrubbing, rubbing.
Speaker 3: Just like little Christina on the floorsool, rubbing my silkwood,
Speaker 3: scrubbing my body down.
Speaker 2: Wow. Yeah, yeah, I don't know that that's in my future,
Speaker 2: but this certainly, Yeah, it's going to be very interesting
Speaker 2: where this ends up on my body. You might like it.
Speaker 2: What if I get addicted? What if I deeply tan
Speaker 2: all the time? Makes no sense with my hair? Absolutely not.
Speaker 2: It really wouldn't. People would be so confused. I wonder
Speaker 2: what color this is going to turn on my skin.
Speaker 2: It's probably gonna burn me.
Speaker 3: Well, apparently when you look at the directions, it'll say
Speaker 3: like how many coats for?
Speaker 2: Oh interesting, we do this in coats exactly, put on
Speaker 2: a prime or this kind of.
Speaker 3: Thing, right, So I would say, do the first coat, okay,
Speaker 3: but I don't really honestly remember that.
Speaker 2: Well, but three in the morning day really was pandemic,
Speaker 2: you know, and this was the last thing, and you
Speaker 2: just decided it's over. It's done.
Speaker 3: Have you ever turned QVC on since, you know, just
Speaker 3: for old times sake? I did, like maybe six months
Speaker 3: ago or something, and it just didn't do it for
Speaker 3: me anymore.
Speaker 2: Did you have a favorite sales person?
Speaker 3: Yes, but I can't remember her name now. She was great.
Speaker 3: But what I really loved more than that were the models.
Speaker 3: They were my favorite because they sell it so effortlessly
Speaker 3: and they have to do the same gestures over and
Speaker 3: over again. So if they're putting on like a lipstick,
Speaker 3: they put it on and then they go and they
Speaker 3: like kiss and smile and then like pop their eyes
Speaker 3: and their shoulders go up and then they do it again,
Speaker 3: and then they do it back on. I think they
Speaker 3: take it off behind the.
Speaker 2: Scenes, Cake Stone, right, and so they're really really great.
Speaker 2: Sounds like android behavior, very interesting. It is, actually it is.
Speaker 2: It is the automatons.
Speaker 3: They'll be the first to be replaced by the way
Speaker 3: AI comes about.
Speaker 2: Absolutely, Annekins and Ai combining to take these people's shops. Absolutely,
Speaker 2: we welcome it. Yeah, we absolutely welcome it. Well, I've
Speaker 2: got all kinds of things to deal with here. Now
Speaker 2: I've got my shampoo, I've got my I'm gonna be
Speaker 2: a whole new person. Yeah, people are not going to
Speaker 2: know what to do with me. And you're earthquake ready.
Speaker 2: Absolutely earth These are the two things I'll have while
Speaker 2: the bombs are dropping. I'll just be tan My hair'll
Speaker 2: be nice and dry, and I'll be starving.
Speaker 3: When the bomb drops, You'll just be tanning, furious.
Speaker 2: Step out into the waste land, and people will their
Speaker 2: jaws are going to drop exactly. I think we should
Speaker 2: play a game I would love to on a least
Speaker 2: I think probably back to Gift Master, right, Yeah, we
Speaker 2: haven't played it in a minute. I need to number
Speaker 2: between one and ten from you. Seven Okay, I have
Speaker 2: to do some like calculating right now to get our
Speaker 2: game pieces. So you can recommend, you can promote, you
Speaker 2: can do whatever you want with the mic. You gotta So.
Speaker 3: I'm going to show called nine one one formerly on Fox,
Speaker 3: this season on ABC. It starts March fourteenth. You can
Speaker 3: catch old episodes on Hulu. My favorite one was called
Speaker 3: First Respect. I think it was from season five, and
Speaker 3: I have a big arc in that one, which is
Speaker 3: very fun. But I play the nine moment call center boss,
Speaker 3: you can do that. I also have a few very
Speaker 3: fun podcasts, one of which Bridger has been on called
Speaker 3: Ask Grana with Rona and Brian. It's an advice podcast.
Speaker 3: I have another podcast called Attitudes. It's a blast with
Speaker 3: my friend Aaron Gibson where we talk about queer and
Speaker 3: gender issues in a very funny way. And yeah, I
Speaker 3: perform live a lot, doing stand up and other things.
Speaker 3: So follow me at Brian's.
Speaker 2: Sofie, Brian's Delightful and everywhere. Go follow the advice. Nine
Speaker 2: to one one is such a wild show. It's very
Speaker 2: fun to one.
Speaker 3: It's a real wild card in my life.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I never expected to do what an incredible job.
Speaker 2: It's so fun, it really is. This is how we're
Speaker 2: gonna play gift Master. I'm gonna name three celebrities and
Speaker 2: three gifts you're going to give away. Okay, you're gonna
Speaker 2: tell me which gift you'll give which celebrity guy to
Speaker 2: make perfect sense, yes, okay. The things you're giving away
Speaker 2: today are number one, AB Sculpting, which is kind of
Speaker 2: in line with these products, sure. Number two is a
Speaker 2: free refill on a fountain drink, and number three is
Speaker 2: some time behind bars. The three celebrities you'll be giving
Speaker 2: them too are number one David Lee Roth still Alive,
Speaker 2: please still be alive, or maybe you're Number two Kevin O'Leary,
Speaker 2: mister Wonderful from Shark Tank. And number three is b York.
Speaker 3: Okay, I'm going to give David Lee Roth the refill
Speaker 3: simply because I don't really have that stronger opinion on him,
Speaker 3: and I feel like refilling your fountain drink is something
Speaker 3: that is so inconsequential and really in this life doesn't matter.
Speaker 3: So I'm going to bestow that him. Now, Listen, that's
Speaker 3: not to take away from his talent. I love the
Speaker 3: Van Halen hits as much as.
Speaker 2: The others get us all going.
Speaker 3: Absolutely, you know who died, Eddie van Halen died, not
Speaker 3: David three name same band.
Speaker 2: You can only have one member of the band, have
Speaker 2: three n that's the new rule.
Speaker 3: So I'm going to give him the refill only. Also
Speaker 3: also on a wily night out. He is the kind
Speaker 3: of person I would expect to see it like a
Speaker 3: seven eleven.
Speaker 2: Do you know what I mean, like in the middle
Speaker 2: of the night, David right, his corvettes out front, still rumbling.
Speaker 3: The hair is long, but you know what I mean,
Speaker 3: especially if you were like on the Sunset strip. Oh yeah,
Speaker 3: like a seven eleven by.
Speaker 2: Driving That makes perfect sense.
Speaker 3: Yes, really, wow, I could see that very clearly.
Speaker 2: Right, and he's got his like sixty four ounces of
Speaker 2: diet mountain dew.
Speaker 3: Absolutely, York, I'm gonna put now Listen. She's a full
Speaker 3: icon for me from when I was young. I love
Speaker 3: her and I'm just such a fan. I'm you're gonna
Speaker 3: put her behind bars because I remember watching Dancer in
Speaker 3: the Dark. She is behind bars in that movie.
Speaker 2: I've never seen. I need to see it. It's good,
Speaker 2: I mean, it's it's a hard one to get excited
Speaker 2: about watching because it seems bleak and it's.
Speaker 3: Relentless, right, I mean, like Lars Ventrier wants you to
Speaker 3: be so miserable in this his movies.
Speaker 2: I feel like I just have to accidentally watch because
Speaker 2: I'm never gonna be like I've got to have a
Speaker 2: fun night with some pizza.
Speaker 3: No, And it ends up being really cool. But it
Speaker 3: is just one of those things where it's like it's
Speaker 3: a big chore. But I remember she was so good
Speaker 3: in that, And listen, there's something about when artists go
Speaker 3: through a tough period, they and this can even be
Speaker 3: And I'm sure you have felt this way in your
Speaker 3: own life, even when you're down or in a slump
Speaker 3: a lot of times, what comes out of that is
Speaker 3: something really wonderful, right. I feel like, look York's albums
Speaker 3: at this point are Rosetta Stone. I don't I couldn't
Speaker 3: possibly figure it out.
Speaker 2: She did just put out a very accessible single as
Speaker 2: she well.
Speaker 3: I love her, so I feel like if she were
Speaker 3: in prison, that would be a wonderful time for like
Speaker 3: something beautiful to sprout out of it. That makes perfect sense,
Speaker 3: And I'm a big fan of hers.
Speaker 2: If anyone's going to make good out of prison, it's Byork, right,
Speaker 2: she could record a full album in prison.
Speaker 3: Absolutely, yeah, in college ideas York no, please don't, please don't.
Speaker 3: And Kevin O'Leary. Honestly, it would almost make more sense
Speaker 3: for me to put him behind bars, even though I
Speaker 3: don't know if he's ever done anything illegal.
Speaker 2: We don't know what quite happened on that the boat accident? Wait,
Speaker 2: what was that? That's pretty dark? There were some they
Speaker 2: were boating and a boat crash, somebody die, somebody died,
Speaker 2: and he might have known about it. We don't, I
Speaker 2: mean I And again we're back to Lake's. Okay, let's
Speaker 2: not talk about talking about things that I don't quite
Speaker 2: know about. Very let's he was in a boat in
Speaker 2: the news.
Speaker 3: Well, to me, absculpting is a punishment worse than prison,
Speaker 3: but speaking of someone who's never been there, but and
Speaker 3: who's never done the other thing is absculpting surgery.
Speaker 2: I believe it's like surgery, but I don't know what
Speaker 2: they're actually sculpting, right.
Speaker 3: They must be Yeah, I don't either. Is it like,
Speaker 3: are they are putting in implants?
Speaker 2: There must be some sort of plastic or implant, because Alisha,
Speaker 2: it feels like they're doing some research.
Speaker 4: Abdominal etching, a surgical procedure where unwanted fat around the
Speaker 4: mid section is strategically LiPo suctioned from the body in
Speaker 4: an attempt to contour in showcase the abdominal muscles, creating
Speaker 4: a six pack almost overnight. I feel like I must
Speaker 4: have picked a website that was like, we're sold.
Speaker 3: Also, I'm going to give that team that sounds like
Speaker 3: the worst punishment. Yeah, And not that I really have
Speaker 3: a problem with him or anything, but he's the most
Speaker 3: annoying of those three, I think.
Speaker 2: Certainly, So I'll give him that, certainly. And you know,
Speaker 2: you can start wearing like a crop top on Shark
Speaker 2: Tank that don't make me like it? That would spice
Speaker 2: the show up, it would. He's just lounging in that
Speaker 2: chair we see is we all know fake abs? Yeah,
Speaker 2: but it would be a new element for Shark Tank.
Speaker 1: I know.
Speaker 3: I feel like Mark Cuban would be very jealous.
Speaker 2: Oh, he's probably tried the apps all he wants their
Speaker 2: abs trial. Ebbs well beautifully played, excellently played York Don't
Speaker 2: reach Out, Don't go to prison Now. Okay, this is
Speaker 2: the final segment of the podcast. It's called I said,
Speaker 2: no emails people they write into I said, no gifts
Speaker 2: at gmail dot com. Desperate for answers, and you know
Speaker 2: I do an incredible job of helping. You're answering, and
Speaker 2: you're gonna help me. We're going to team up and
Speaker 2: answer a question. Is that? Okay? Absolutely? Okay, let me
Speaker 2: get in here and read this and this email they
Speaker 2: did not address either of us. Usually there's a dear bridge,
Speaker 2: you're in lovely guests, there's no you know, it's just
Speaker 2: we're getting into the email.
Speaker 3: Tax sounds urgent and tacky.
Speaker 2: Urgent and tacky, they go hand in hand. Okay, this
Speaker 2: is I have a friend, Tiffany, who I met while
Speaker 2: working at a restaurant. We worked together for a few
Speaker 2: months before I left that position. Over the course of
Speaker 2: the past couple of years, we've gotten very close to
Speaker 2: the point where I would say she is one of
Speaker 2: my best friends. When we began hanging out, I had
Speaker 2: an inkling that she had a crush on me. However,
Speaker 2: I assumed it was a passing thing and she never
Speaker 2: said anything outright. Recently, we made plans to have a
Speaker 2: night out on the town and went out drinking and dancing.
Speaker 2: At some point on this night we hooked up in
Speaker 2: the bathroom at a bar. We haven't really talked about
Speaker 2: the hookup, and it seems so far like it didn't
Speaker 2: affect our friendship at all. My problem is that Tiffany's
Speaker 2: birthday is coming up, and I'm unsure what to get her. Typically,
Speaker 2: I'm decent at giving gifts and can find items that
Speaker 2: feel personal and special. The recent happenings have complicated things,
Speaker 2: and I don't know what to gift her. Please recommend
Speaker 2: gifts that convey that we are still best friends and
Speaker 2: I love her platonically best Nora, Oh.
Speaker 3: Well, the big issue here is you probably should have
Speaker 3: talked to your friend after this.
Speaker 2: The fact that they've just they've just moved on without
Speaker 2: saying a thing.
Speaker 3: Interesting and honest friendship at that point.
Speaker 2: What is it? There's just this unspoken thrill.
Speaker 3: I would discuss it with her at some point and
Speaker 3: just say, let's just talk about this and move on.
Speaker 3: I'm trying to I've never you know, I've never hooked
Speaker 3: up with a friend before.
Speaker 2: Have you ever done that? No, that feels like a
Speaker 2: weird bridge to cross.
Speaker 3: It feels for me, at least, it feels practically incestuous.
Speaker 3: I don't think I could do it, But I think
Speaker 3: if I did do it, I would probably need a
Speaker 3: little bit of breathing room. I understand that, But then
Speaker 3: I would really want to talk to them about it.
Speaker 3: And I think if I gave them a gift, it's
Speaker 3: tough because without talking about it, then you're stuck in
Speaker 3: this thing of not wanting it to seem like a
Speaker 3: signal or something, but also not wanting it to seem
Speaker 3: like an office gift or like a secret Santa situation.
Speaker 2: But the most boring possible thing.
Speaker 3: Wow, I think anything on it like dot don't do
Speaker 3: a candle or like shampao I think, I don't know,
Speaker 3: like a really thoughtful book I think is nice?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: Interesting?
Speaker 3: Do I give people for their birth I mean it's
Speaker 3: always something they like, right, and you don't do with
Speaker 3: their interests right, absculpting, absculpting for sure, time in prison,
Speaker 3: A leaf of her farm drink. Absolutely, she don't know
Speaker 3: what happened that night. I mean she could have robbed
Speaker 3: a bank.
Speaker 2: That's true.
Speaker 3: Or what I love to give actually are art books.
Speaker 2: I like to do that.
Speaker 3: I just gave my friend Arden had a birthday, who
Speaker 3: I'm sure you know of course, and I gave her
Speaker 3: I knew she liked that movie All the Beauty in
Speaker 3: the Bloodshed, so I gave her, like a nan golden book.
Speaker 2: That's a very appreciative. I like stuff like that. And
Speaker 2: art book is a very nice thing to get. Everybody
Speaker 2: appreciates it, and it doesn't like it Unlike a book,
Speaker 2: it doesn't require a huge time investment. No, you can
Speaker 2: glance through it whenever you Yeah, and.
Speaker 3: It's nice to do that, and actually whenever you put it.
Speaker 3: They now sell like stands that you can put on
Speaker 3: with coffee table books. And it's nice because then every
Speaker 3: day you can just open it to a new spread,
Speaker 3: you know what I mean.
Speaker 2: Right, that's kind of nice. Right, it's kind of a
Speaker 2: nice thing thing.
Speaker 3: See, that might be kind of cool obviously, a lot
Speaker 3: of like bikinis.
Speaker 2: Bikinis, flowers to the office, flowers, an expensive ring, chocolates,
Speaker 2: a weekend away exactly. You know these are the.
Speaker 3: Churn be framed and a heart frame, a car with
Speaker 3: a big bow on it. That would be really nice. Yeah,
Speaker 3: these are the.
Speaker 2: Things that Tiffany will then say, we're obviously just friends, exactly,
Speaker 2: We're simply just friends. Go for that. Nora take these things,
Speaker 2: mix them up, yeah, stir them in your cauldron. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and uh, I feel like Tiffany is going to be
Speaker 2: thrilled it. But what ultimately, do not talk about this ever?
Speaker 2: Again the tension is too exciting?
Speaker 3: Definitely not if it really. But what doesn't encourage a
Speaker 3: midlife crisis is bottling everything up until you possibly can't anymore.
Speaker 3: So you don't let anything out.
Speaker 2: This will be It's the perfect plan.
Speaker 3: Keep filling that balloon with air.
Speaker 2: Norah, don't write in again. Beautifully beautifully answered Brian, I've
Speaker 2: got these beautiful products that I'm going to be using. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's a whole new me. Twenty twenty four. People were
Speaker 2: looking for a new visual with me. They were they
Speaker 2: were looking for me getting as represent yourself absolute please absolutely,
Speaker 2: people are sick of whatever you're peddling. So I'm going
Speaker 2: to be kind of a tan, dry haired lady of
Speaker 2: the day.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I think that's a decent, decent thing for me to play.
Speaker 3: Future Traders contestants or host if they have the prize money.
Speaker 2: They want, I could I either take over for allan
Speaker 2: Coming or they maybe do a hyper local Traders I
Speaker 2: could host that. Yeah, But if I do end up
Speaker 2: on the show. I'll be extremely tann there we go
Speaker 2: and everyone will be talking about it. Everyone trusts t Yeah, yeah, well,
Speaker 2: thank you for being here. This is my pleasure. This
Speaker 2: is a blast. Listen. The podcast is coming to a close.
Speaker 2: It's not raining anymore. I'm gonna do something with my day.
Speaker 2: God only knows what You're going to do. Whatever you want.
Speaker 2: You have to stop listening to the podcast, Please get away.
Speaker 2: I love you, goodbye. I said, No Gifts is an
Speaker 2: exactly right production. It's produced by our dear friend Analise Neilson,
Speaker 2: and it's beautifully mixed by Ben Holliday. And we couldn't
Speaker 2: do it without our guest booker, Patrick Kottner. The theme song,
Speaker 2: of course, could only come from miracle worker Amy Mann.
Speaker 2: You must follow the show on Instagram. At I said
Speaker 2: no Gifts, I don't want to hear any excuses. That's
Speaker 2: where you get to see pictures of all these gorgeous
Speaker 2: gifts I'm getting. And don't you want to see pictures
Speaker 2: of the gifts?
Speaker 1: Lievit did you hear? Funa man myself perfectly clear? But
Speaker 1: you're I guessed, Timma, you gotta come to me empty And.
Speaker 2: I said no guest.
Speaker 1: Your own presence is presents enough. I already had too
Speaker 1: much stuff, So how do you dare to surbey me?