Speaker 1: Hey guys, it's I Do Part two and it's your
Speaker 1: celebrity mentors.
Speaker 2: Cheryl Burke and Jen Fessler. Hey girls, So there's so much.
Speaker 1: Happening right now.
Speaker 2: Cheryl, can I just say that, I mean, I'm a
Speaker 2: little starstruck. No, yes, not no, yes, I've been watching
Speaker 2: you for so many years. It's just the most exciting
Speaker 2: thing that this is. Like why I think like the
Speaker 2: Whole Housewives of it all, not that it was fun
Speaker 2: to do, but like this comes up always freaks me out.
Speaker 2: I can't believe that I'm talking with Cheryl Burke and
Speaker 2: you're really cool for me.
Speaker 1: You're so sweet. When are you going to be doing
Speaker 1: Dancing with the.
Speaker 2: Stars as soon? That's not true, I say, as soon
Speaker 2: as they asked me. Never really, I mean I don't know.
Speaker 2: I could barely walk, so I can't imagine.
Speaker 1: Well, I could whip you into shape off camera.
Speaker 2: I know you.
Speaker 1: Well, it's nice to meet you.
Speaker 2: It's so nice to meet you.
Speaker 1: So there's so much happening in the headlines right now.
Speaker 1: Do you want to kick it off.
Speaker 2: Well, let's start with the most heartbreaking thing that I've
Speaker 2: read in quite some time. Keith Urban and Nicole Kidman
Speaker 2: are getting divorced. I mean, this one hurt. This one's
Speaker 2: stunk because first of all, I well, I really love
Speaker 2: him and I love her. It's hard not to. But
Speaker 2: just their relationship to me, the way he used to
Speaker 2: like go to war shows and you'd be like, I
Speaker 2: love you baby, whatever however he would say in his
Speaker 2: Australian accent, And they were so affectionate right right. And
Speaker 2: the war show it was almost like a little cringey
Speaker 2: but it was just taller than him and and but
Speaker 2: it just was so the whole thing to me was
Speaker 2: so adorable.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they were just overly affectionate, I think as a
Speaker 1: couple and in person that I think in the beginning
Speaker 1: I was kind of like, oh, is this is this real?
Speaker 1: You know, like just because it was. I don't think
Speaker 1: we're used to seeing that, Especially with celebrity couples. They
Speaker 1: do tend to you know, pull back.
Speaker 2: Maybe oh well yeah or yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean they're not all over each other, you know
Speaker 1: as much. I don't see that as much, right, I don't.
Speaker 2: Know, I thought I bought into it as much as Yes,
Speaker 2: there were times I was like, what is happening here?
Speaker 2: Especially with him, he seemed like he seemed mesmerized with her,
Speaker 2: which I mean, how could he not be, and especially
Speaker 2: like on the Tales of the her first marriage, which
Speaker 2: you know was so heartbreaking, so the tom Quis Cruise
Speaker 2: and yeah, she'd found love, you know, the second time around,
Speaker 2: and he was just another superstar.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean she's a superstar in her own right, Oh, bigger.
Speaker 2: Than both of them really this well, but yeah, she's.
Speaker 1: Huge, She's huge. She seems really humble. She seems like
Speaker 1: she's a good person, and I I mean, I've never
Speaker 1: heard anything bad about Nicole Kidman on a personal level,
Speaker 1: and that's always a good sign. And same with him,
Speaker 1: by the way.
Speaker 3: Always the sweetest. If you did you watch on do
Speaker 3: you watch the Voice?
Speaker 1: I did not watch it with him on it, now.
Speaker 2: Not the Voice American Idol, but he was he on
Speaker 2: American Idol, Yeah, with Lionel Richie.
Speaker 1: Oh no, I had did not see that. I didn't
Speaker 1: even know he was on it.
Speaker 2: He was and so sweet and encouraging to the to
Speaker 2: the contestants. Yeah, yes, did you see it coming? I
Speaker 2: definitely didn't.
Speaker 1: So I did do a little digging, as I do,
Speaker 1: and I guess he you know, he's going through sobriety
Speaker 1: or he I don't know if he's trying to be
Speaker 1: sober or if he is publicly has announced this, but
Speaker 1: there has been some sort of alcohol involvement when it
Speaker 1: comes to their relationship and something that I guess that
Speaker 1: this is just per an article that I'm reading. This
Speaker 1: is not anything that I know personally, but supposedly it
Speaker 1: was an issue even before they got married, but Nicole
Speaker 1: still moved forward with it, you know, and I'm sober,
Speaker 1: so I've been sober for seven years now, and it,
Speaker 1: you know, it does become that third person, your addiction
Speaker 1: sometimes if not staying on top of it, you know.
Speaker 2: Also, I have no idea this factors into it, but
Speaker 2: this is just us, you know, guessing. But I know
Speaker 2: her mom passed away recently, and I'm not sure that
Speaker 2: that would lead them obviously to get divorced, but it
Speaker 2: seems like just emotionally she's been going through it. I
Speaker 2: don't know.
Speaker 1: Well, there's also some cheating allegations that I read as well.
Speaker 3: I read that you're killing me really don't.
Speaker 2: Shoot the messenger? Not wait who him or her?
Speaker 1: Him? Oh, come on, he's supposedly actually currently seeing somebody.
Speaker 2: So so funny people always say this, and you know,
Speaker 2: you think about women like Nicole Kidman, you know, one
Speaker 2: of the most beautiful women in the world and a
Speaker 2: superstar and so seems so warm and talented, and you know,
Speaker 2: I guess it doesn't in the end, the physical maybe doesn't.
Speaker 1: I don't think it matters, just doesn't.
Speaker 2: No, But I mean it looks like they I mean,
Speaker 2: if you can have at least this is what I'm reading,
Speaker 2: you tell me, but if you could have an amicable
Speaker 2: divorce or you know, not so complicated, it looks like
Speaker 2: they From what I'm reading, it looks like.
Speaker 1: They're I think they've settled. It is it over? It's
Speaker 1: not over.
Speaker 2: They've settled.
Speaker 1: As far as like properties go, they never had any
Speaker 1: shared they didn't have joint they didn't have anything together.
Speaker 1: They never bought property together, even Nashville. And I don't
Speaker 1: know where she is, but I do know that they
Speaker 1: have already like split the furnit. I mean, they already
Speaker 1: went through it in that sense.
Speaker 2: And the kids too, right, like they've already worked out
Speaker 2: the kids this custody. He gets the kids on Father's Day.
Speaker 2: I don't know. That's all I read up to. Definitely
Speaker 2: there's a lot less time than she does. It used
Speaker 2: to be that just the mothers did get so much more,
Speaker 2: and I don't know that it's like that as much.
Speaker 1: I mean, the kids are not that young either, so
Speaker 1: I mean I'm sure they had to.
Speaker 2: Say yeah, fair enough.
Speaker 1: And if they're in school, they're not going to want
Speaker 1: to go to a new school in Nashville, and.
Speaker 2: Even there, I think even like their Christmas vacations, like
Speaker 2: they alternate Christmas maybe even day and then, but she
Speaker 2: gets more of a vacation.
Speaker 1: I don't know, I mean, and if he is with
Speaker 1: somebody else, that is not I mean, these kids are again,
Speaker 1: they're not They're old enough to be bothered by that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, agreed. Yeah, I mean I'm assuming they're
Speaker 2: had to have been a prenup, which is which I
Speaker 2: would have definitely if anyone asked me, I would have
Speaker 2: definitely suggest it.
Speaker 1: With that kind of wealth, well, I do believe that
Speaker 1: because they're both successful, I think that eliminates quite a
Speaker 1: lot of drama, right, Like they're not necessarily money hungry.
Speaker 2: Right, they're both independently wealthy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and I think that helps a lot.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Yeah, definitely, no one that fear that financial and
Speaker 2: security and the fighting over the money is right, And.
Speaker 1: We don't know where they got married or whatever, but
Speaker 1: like in California, you know, like it is interesting. You
Speaker 1: can cheat all you want. They don't care, right.
Speaker 2: Don't either. I think it's not it's a no fault
Speaker 2: state or something.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so it's like, no, they're trying to take the
Speaker 1: emotions out of everything though it's very much not not related.
Speaker 1: Do you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, I'm just reading some of the notes here,
Speaker 2: but it's yeah, she definitely gets a lot more time
Speaker 2: than him, and I guess. Yeah, neither one is paying alimony,
Speaker 2: no need it. It says both Kimen and Urban's monthly
Speaker 2: income is reported in the filings as exceeding one hundred
Speaker 2: thousand dollars, which I'm sure it, you know, way exceeds it.
Speaker 2: But did he I feel like he talked about maybe
Speaker 2: he didn't get sober, like a few years back. Yeah,
Speaker 2: maybe he didn't get sober.
Speaker 1: He talked about being sober, I guess, and in twenty
Speaker 1: twenty one, but see, this is when I had decided
Speaker 1: to be sober. I just know that when I announce anything,
Speaker 1: it's like then the pressure and the overwhelming anxiety I have.
Speaker 2: To have to live to that.
Speaker 1: Like so, I never told anyone about my not even
Speaker 1: my ex husband at the time, Like, I just decided
Speaker 1: to do it and see if I could do it
Speaker 1: for longer than just a week.
Speaker 2: Wow, did you do it with the through like AA
Speaker 2: or did you just do it on your own and
Speaker 2: one day? Well?
Speaker 1: I didn't do AA right away. I first, Well, in
Speaker 1: all transparency, I started. I stopped drinking as soon as
Speaker 1: my father passed away, and I started having an allergic
Speaker 1: reaction like hives on my face to I think the
Speaker 1: poison I was putting in my body. But I was
Speaker 1: also very functioning drunk, so no one knew it was
Speaker 1: very and that's the most dangerous I believe. So. But
Speaker 1: I do know this that at that time, if anyone
Speaker 1: told me, okay, maybe you need to like cool it
Speaker 1: like no more, the more I'd want to drink. Because
Speaker 1: until you take accountability, until you want to change your life,
Speaker 1: the person or the people who are telling you to
Speaker 1: be sober, you're going to resent. And so if let's say,
Speaker 1: I'm not saying this is true, but if she tries to,
Speaker 1: you can't change anybody, right like, period, point blank. If
Speaker 1: you we're going to really just make this a quick
Speaker 1: and short cliff no version, and when you do, then
Speaker 1: there is built up presentment I think towards that person.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean I again, like they're being so hush
Speaker 2: hush about it. It's hard to you know, I understand.
Speaker 2: I know exactly what happened. Maybe, Yeah, I mean that
Speaker 2: makes sense. The cheating certainly makes sense.
Speaker 1: And she wanted to work it out still though you
Speaker 1: know she's like but clearly he's not. Yeah, I saw
Speaker 1: that not wanting that. I think it helps when you
Speaker 1: move on. I supposedly. I don't know, sorry, but.
Speaker 2: I can't help it. Fucking Keith urban Man.
Speaker 1: Come on, are you that shocked? Though, I'm not shocked
Speaker 1: in general. I'm just not shocked. I think I'm jaded.
Speaker 2: I'm rarely yeah, but I'm rarely shocked at these Yeah,
Speaker 2: I really am. I guess I think like I always
Speaker 2: thought after Tom Cruise that weird.
Speaker 1: That was the whole scientistic I don't think that I
Speaker 1: hate thing to do with. I mean, she knew what
Speaker 1: she was getting into.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think he was cuckoo. I mean my opinion,
Speaker 2: and so what a nice thing to.
Speaker 1: Find like right, like this, but it's not like she
Speaker 1: didn't know about it, you know.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but the choice.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, and I'm sorry, I don't I try not
Speaker 2: to judge, especially when I don't even know what I'm
Speaker 2: talking about. But the same friend him, Yeah, exactly, exactly,
Speaker 2: here's what I think either, right exactly.
Speaker 1: I mean like and by the way, you know, we
Speaker 1: all know that that's a rebound and how long do
Speaker 1: rebounds last? Right, And that's going to be a direct
Speaker 1: effect to his sobriety. I mean for me, at least
Speaker 1: it would. It would definitely be. You know, that is
Speaker 1: another drug women and men, and that's another addiction.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, no, I've been there. I think at one
Speaker 2: point in my life. I definitely have that addiction. Love addiction,
Speaker 2: the love addiction. It definitely and I think we all
Speaker 2: do it. Creeps some havoc, I don't, you know, Thank God,
Speaker 2: I've been through it. You know, I don't know each other. Well,
Speaker 2: hopefully we will get to. But I've been separated. I've
Speaker 2: not been I was separated for like a year and
Speaker 2: a half and I think we both kind of went
Speaker 2: like a little crazy, but you know, trying to find
Speaker 2: chasing that spark, and you know what I thought was
Speaker 2: missing from that passion that you know, I didn't have
Speaker 2: a lot of boyfriends. I had a lot of I
Speaker 2: had a lot of I had a lot of sex,
Speaker 2: but I didn't have a lot of boyfriends necessarily, and
Speaker 2: I think I was so it was such an addiction
Speaker 2: for me to get attention from men and all of
Speaker 2: that one you know, today it's a totally different thing.
Speaker 2: I see a spark as something completely different, totally. It's
Speaker 2: not right.
Speaker 1: I mean, I have been choosing not to date. I
Speaker 1: haven't date since my ex husband, so it's been three
Speaker 1: years of no sex of nothing. And I was a
Speaker 1: serial dater, so like por prior to getting married, I
Speaker 1: never was single since I was thirteen. Really, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: Like it was like I always had backup plans because
Speaker 1: I thought that you could fill up your cup without
Speaker 1: anything outside of you except for me having to do
Speaker 1: my own work, which was never going to be an
Speaker 1: option obviously until now. But like, nothing is sustainable when
Speaker 1: you look for that anything else outside of you fill
Speaker 1: up what is whatever you're yearning for another half? Right right,
Speaker 1: there's no such thing. And I think these movies right
Speaker 1: are so dangerous, Like the notebook and all of it,
Speaker 1: because it's not real like that, it's not real a man.
Speaker 2: Sister, But listen, I thought if it was going to
Speaker 2: be real, and Nicole, you are, but listen, they also,
Speaker 2: I mean.
Speaker 1: They're also just human, you know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean I also I read that
Speaker 2: decisions about the kids they're going to make together, which
Speaker 2: I think is fabulous. Although I think she had a
Speaker 2: final say because I think a lot of well I
Speaker 2: have a lot of friends who have been through divorce,
Speaker 2: are going through divorce. I mean, I think we all
Speaker 2: probably do, but that but it was the money, the
Speaker 2: hardest parts of the money, and the kids obviously, and
Speaker 2: that struggle of and I know both men and women
Speaker 2: that that that just tore apart for the men some
Speaker 2: times feeling like they had no power and whether or
Speaker 2: not they did, and for the mother feeling like a
Speaker 2: lot of times this and this is just my personal experience.
Speaker 2: I'm not saying this.
Speaker 1: You're right, I'm laughing because it's very relatable. I know it.
Speaker 1: I know it, I've lived through. But that that has
Speaker 1: nothing to do with us. If you feel emasculated, that's
Speaker 1: all on you, buddy.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, that yes, agreed. And the mother is feeling
Speaker 2: like I do know better. I am a mama bearry.
Speaker 2: I know that this is what's right for this kid,
Speaker 2: and that struggle. Right. I've been with a kid more,
Speaker 2: I've raised the kid. Let's say, not in all cases.
Speaker 2: I don't want to get any blowback from this, but
Speaker 2: just in some of the ones, most ones that I've gone,
Speaker 2: you know known my friends are like, I fing gave
Speaker 2: birth to this kid. I raised this kid.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know what so, but I mean I have
Speaker 1: to say when my mom and dad divorced at a
Speaker 1: young age, my very first memory as a kid. This
Speaker 1: audience has I think heard it before, but I'll tell
Speaker 1: it again was my dad cheating on my mother with
Speaker 1: another woman, with his secretary. I was like two, And
Speaker 1: I know this much that I would have whenever it
Speaker 1: was time for me to see my father because they
Speaker 1: separated obviously, and I had I never wanted to see
Speaker 1: him because he was always with a different woman. So
Speaker 1: and I was very young. So if the kids can
Speaker 1: speak for themselves, which I'm sure they can, I highly
Speaker 1: doubt they're going to want to be there with him
Speaker 1: if he's with somebody else.
Speaker 2: I was three, Cheryl, and I used to cry. I
Speaker 2: did not want to leave my mind.
Speaker 1: I know, I know the feeling, and.
Speaker 2: My father was quite the womanizer, so you know, when
Speaker 2: I had dealt with it and that went into my twenties,
Speaker 2: I still don't want to meet the new one ever.
Speaker 1: I know it's a horrible feel. It's hard to like
Speaker 1: put into words for me at least, like it's.
Speaker 2: Just I do.
Speaker 1: I felt so like I felt like he was cheating
Speaker 1: on me.
Speaker 2: It was weird. It was a weird like protective. I
Speaker 2: think that's very common.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but I under I mean now obviously it makes
Speaker 1: sense as to like, you know, the pattern that I followed.
Speaker 2: It's so crucial those years of your life. You know,
Speaker 2: look at you bone now exactly taking all your time
Speaker 2: for you. I love that, and I'm sorry. I don't
Speaker 2: mean to be shallow, but I just feel like, when
Speaker 2: you're ready, you're not going to have a hard time
Speaker 2: finding a man.
Speaker 1: Oh, I love you saying just saying thank you. Unfortunately,
Speaker 1: I don't like to leave my homes unless he's behind
Speaker 1: closet number three. I don't know if I'm going to
Speaker 1: meet anybody, But that's a whole nother podcast.
Speaker 2: You're a lot younger than you, and I have that now.
Speaker 2: But I am a homebody. I really also not just
Speaker 2: my home. I really would rather not leave my bed.
Speaker 1: So there's like, do we move on to the next
Speaker 1: horrible divorce? This is just so a deadie downer, but
Speaker 1: it is real. This is real life, right, So let's
Speaker 1: talk about Oh, Scott Wolf, I haven't followed two. I mean,
Speaker 1: it's just it got really like dramatic fast.
Speaker 2: I mean, I saw did you see a cup? I
Speaker 2: saw a meltdown?
Speaker 1: No, I can't. I don't know why. That type of
Speaker 1: stuff really triggers me. I just get really uncomfortable. I
Speaker 1: don't like it.
Speaker 2: It's uncomfortable, it's uncomfortable, sad to watch, and you know,
Speaker 2: it was kind of everywhere. So I think a Scott
Speaker 2: Wolf from Party of Five.
Speaker 1: Well, I actually did something with him recently, not recently,
Speaker 1: this was recently. It was like ten years ago, but
Speaker 1: it feels like yesterday. We did some game show on
Speaker 1: ABC together and he was so I mean, listen, everyone,
Speaker 1: when you first meet at them, they're great people, right,
Speaker 1: we don't know what's happening behind closed doors, but it
Speaker 1: doesn't seem to be like he seems like no drama.
Speaker 1: He seems really calm, you know.
Speaker 2: I again, this is one of those where we're just speculating,
Speaker 2: but I feel her pain and I feel her She's
Speaker 2: she definitely is from what it appears, although she denies it.
Speaker 2: She seems a little bit unhinged mental health, maybe with
Speaker 2: very good reason. I don't know what kind of husband
Speaker 2: he was. I don't know what kind of you know,
Speaker 2: relationship they had, but I see him being pretty staunch,
Speaker 2: and it sounds and from what I'm reading, it seems
Speaker 2: is that she's not getting the time with her kids.
Speaker 2: And I mean that has that's from.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't know that feeling because I don't have kids, so.
Speaker 2: It's, you know, the just the very thought of it
Speaker 2: is so it is so overwhelming and frightening. And I
Speaker 2: don't know kind of mother. I have no idea all
Speaker 2: of that. But what I see right now is just
Speaker 2: sad and sound. It feels like she's she has calm,
Speaker 2: a bit undone.
Speaker 1: Well, I have to say that, it makes it seem
Speaker 1: like she's gotten mentally insane. And but then now when
Speaker 1: you're saying that, I'm like, okay, but we don't I
Speaker 1: don't know all the pieces, right, I don't know. And
Speaker 1: by the way, no one really knows but them. But
Speaker 1: unfortunately they're public figures and it's just not making her
Speaker 1: look good.
Speaker 2: Well, she didn't show up her court this last I
Speaker 2: believe this this last time, and she's she's for whatever reason.
Speaker 1: It's related to misdemeanor charges though she's facing. So you know, look,
Speaker 1: but like you said, if you take your kids away
Speaker 1: from a mother, I would kill somebody too, right, Like
Speaker 1: I would literally fight too, Like I would fight for
Speaker 1: my kids.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I fought for my dog, Like yeah, listen, I mean,
Speaker 2: oh wait, she posted at one point Scott's phone number.
Speaker 1: Okay, that's not okay, So that's not okay regardless, Right,
Speaker 1: But look, I just think mental health is just still
Speaker 1: so uncomfortable for people to talk about stigmatize. I feel
Speaker 1: like you are a danger to society if you leave
Speaker 1: your home and you're not mentally healthy and to yourself. Yes, exactly,
Speaker 1: And it's like that is the scariest, Like we're seeing
Speaker 1: it on CNN on the news, people are just like
Speaker 1: gone bat crazy, right, I feel like, especially now there's
Speaker 1: no filter.
Speaker 2: I feel like that too. I know. Also, her kids
Speaker 2: made some not great posts about her, so that's what.
Speaker 1: So that's so, that's sad.
Speaker 3: It is really really freaking sad.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean, you know, you watch all these stories
Speaker 2: and sometimes they're salacious, and if you're somebody, which I don't,
Speaker 2: I'm happy to admit it. But who loves sometimes you know, drama,
Speaker 2: gossip and drama and Hollywood, you know, trash talking, and
Speaker 2: so you know, you get off on it a little bit.
Speaker 2: But the truth is, like something like this, it just
Speaker 2: seems so sad to me.
Speaker 1: I think that's why I don't like to read about it,
Speaker 1: because I do feel like I'm like reading someone's diary
Speaker 1: or something. I feel so uncomfortable. I don't like when
Speaker 1: I see people fight on TV. It makes me so uncomfortable.
Speaker 1: Never watch Housewives I have, but and whenever you whenever
Speaker 1: anybody fight. No, but I think it's the little girl.
Speaker 1: I think there's something being triggered. Obviously, I think whether
Speaker 1: it's my mom and dad fighting. Never physical, but still
Speaker 1: like I don't like it. It makes me uncomfortable. But
Speaker 1: for some people they love it.
Speaker 2: I watched it, I was a huge, huge fan and now,
Speaker 2: but it's not fun to be in the middle of it.
Speaker 2: For I can't imagine girl.
Speaker 1: I cannot imagine no, and then having to watch it back, Oh.
Speaker 2: My god, and then the social media and the hate
Speaker 2: of it all. Yes, not that I don't I think
Speaker 2: dancing with the Stars would be harder, but that's me.
Speaker 2: Well yeah, physically maybe different. So what about are you
Speaker 2: seeing j Lo's comments about so she has this new
Speaker 2: movie and she's making all these comments about her marriage
Speaker 2: and Ben Affleck. I don't know about her divorce. I
Speaker 2: mean I haven't seen anything like too specific, but just
Speaker 2: talking about how how distraught she was during I'm sure
Speaker 2: she was.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean it seems like really at a left field,
Speaker 1: like where did that come from?
Speaker 2: Isere? How did they get back together? Right? I mean,
Speaker 2: do you remember the song she wrote for him the
Speaker 2: first time they got together? Oh weird? Yeah that yeah? Whoa?
Speaker 2: I mean talk about I love.
Speaker 1: I'm not saying she's a love an addict, but like
Speaker 1: she loves love like who doesn't? Right, Like clearly she
Speaker 1: gives a chance to love, whether it doesn't matter who
Speaker 1: it is.
Speaker 2: Right right, right? She says the thing about like it
Speaker 2: was the this the divorce is the best thing that
Speaker 2: ever happened to her because it changed doubt that I
Speaker 2: doubt it too. Let's be real here, she also just
Speaker 2: got she just went through getting kind of like publicly slammed. Yes, yeah,
Speaker 2: like just not being such a sweet per person. Yeah yeah,
Speaker 2: So I mean I'm sure, I'm sure she has changed. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I mean, and listen, he obviously has also had issues,
Speaker 2: substance issues.
Speaker 1: And exactly but like he keeps going running back home
Speaker 1: to his ex.
Speaker 2: If if I hadn't Jennifer Garner, I would be I
Speaker 2: would too, exactly right.
Speaker 1: I mean, she seems like a safe house for me
Speaker 1: at least I kind of run home to her too.
Speaker 3: I one hundred percent would.
Speaker 1: Make me a warm meal and maybe feel all good
Speaker 1: and warm inside.
Speaker 2: One hundred percent. And when it when they first got divorced,
Speaker 2: and I was like, what did you do?
Speaker 1: But you know that's got to trigger the other Jennifer, Like,
Speaker 1: come on, that's so triggering totally.
Speaker 2: And you know she stills like sometimes hanging out with
Speaker 2: the kids. I think that looks that seems messy to me.
Speaker 2: She's mess sun out. Photo ops.
Speaker 1: The photo is what kills me. I can't do the
Speaker 1: photo ops. I agree, And unfortunately today you can see
Speaker 1: when it's a photo up.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you get everywhere and you see
Speaker 3: it fast.
Speaker 1: Yeah, does it it rubs people the wrong way? Now,
Speaker 1: like we all can see just like television, you can't lie,
Speaker 1: whether it's your body language that you're not hiding or whatever.
Speaker 1: It is Like for me, you could just see it
Speaker 1: on my face no matter how much botox I had,
Speaker 1: right like, it didn't matter, like you can see it
Speaker 1: and so like.
Speaker 2: There was nothing that you can same thing with me,
Speaker 2: of course with Ben also always specifically. I mean I
Speaker 2: don't think I've seen I didn't see I haven't seen
Speaker 2: Ben with her kids. I've just seen her with his.
Speaker 1: Kids, which seems forced.
Speaker 3: I don't know, I don't know, it feels it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it feels very messy to me, and I think
Speaker 2: that maybe for the kids that would be confusing. But
Speaker 2: they have Jennifer Garner for a mother who is not
Speaker 2: because no one is, but gives the appearance to me
Speaker 2: of being a perfect mother.
Speaker 1: So well, yeah, I mean she just seems like a
Speaker 1: very normal which is which is not normal for us
Speaker 1: to see. Agreed for Gardner is like she just seems
Speaker 1: very normal. She doesn't care, she doesn't wear tons that
Speaker 1: make she's not like, she doesn't care what she looks like.
Speaker 2: I feel this. I feel like that too.
Speaker 1: I feel like there's no way and she's still gorgeous.
Speaker 1: She's even more beautiful.
Speaker 2: Like during the.
Speaker 1: Fires La fire, she was out there, she was getting dirty. Yep,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. And it wasn't a photo op.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, it's funny. I don't Ben. He does
Speaker 2: seem like he keeps sort of showing up and wanting
Speaker 2: to be with her. But when I was separated, I
Speaker 2: was My life was such chaos and I remember just
Speaker 2: feeling like my husband was, what are you doing, Jennifer,
Speaker 2: Like he is your safe place? And I would you know,
Speaker 2: we would, We didn't. It wasn't It wasn't that contentious. Well,
Speaker 2: obviously because we got back together.
Speaker 1: What happened if you don't mind me asking, like, no,
Speaker 1: not at all.
Speaker 2: Why did she split? We're cheated on each other, and
Speaker 2: so that happened. But that's that was the actual impetus.
Speaker 2: But of course I think it was seven years in
Speaker 2: very cliche. We had two young kids and we were
Speaker 2: just really not checking in, not really and arguing a
Speaker 2: lot and feeling the stress of having a young family
Speaker 2: and not taking just I think taking each other. For granted,
Speaker 2: we always say that and then then add infidelity to that,
Speaker 2: and you know it, it kind of fell apart. But
Speaker 2: the thing is, I feel like maybe I, well maybe
Speaker 2: we both felt like Ben in it because there was
Speaker 2: just so much that I missed, and not just mostly
Speaker 2: him my best friend, but also just that feeling of
Speaker 2: peace because my husband is I'm nuts, I'm completely out
Speaker 2: of my working mind and he.
Speaker 1: Is solid, right balances to you, yes, yes.
Speaker 2: And you know, it feels like Ben is definitely the
Speaker 2: one who is who has erratic behavior. Garner seems so.
Speaker 1: I mean, I just what I was scared though I
Speaker 1: don't know any of them, but with Jennifer Gardner, I
Speaker 1: was like, please don't go back to him, like I
Speaker 1: hope that. But clearly she's not just a beautiful woman
Speaker 1: and smart. She's very strong, and she doesn't because she's
Speaker 1: not getting back together with him, but she's definitely still
Speaker 1: cordial obviously, yeah, maybe a little bit more than cordial.
Speaker 1: I think I think there's this thing when people are
Speaker 1: really and I and I think this is where you
Speaker 1: can see the beautiful side of humans, right. I believe
Speaker 1: that when someone's at their lowest, you know, you hopefully
Speaker 1: you have people who love you that will help you, right,
Speaker 1: And I believe that if anything, it's more like she
Speaker 1: feels maybe sorry for him.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah, no, I agree, I feel like that's
Speaker 2: it seems like that to me too.
Speaker 1: I mean, that's you know, the beauty of marriage, right.
Speaker 2: You know, it's funny. I wanted so badly to talk
Speaker 2: to you about your marriage and divorce.
Speaker 1: I can only say so much.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I'll really, you are divorced.
Speaker 1: I am divorced, but we did sign a prenup.
Speaker 2: Yep, I'm and I'm not going to ask you, but
Speaker 2: this is maybe not we're talking about, you know, because
Speaker 2: but at some point I not not just out of curiosity,
Speaker 2: but sounds it sounds like it was first of all,
Speaker 2: very difficult, but it's so inspiring that you're sober.
Speaker 1: And oh yeah it tested me.
Speaker 2: Though, Yeah, I bet it did, no doubt.
Speaker 1: I mean, I also, it wasn't just the divorce with
Speaker 1: my ex. It was the divorce with Dancing with the
Speaker 1: Stars all in one year, and then leaving my home
Speaker 1: I lived in for sixteen years and I moved to
Speaker 1: where I am today. So it's like it's just it
Speaker 1: was all happening in one year, and those are three
Speaker 1: big life changes. They say, if you hit five in
Speaker 1: one year, you're most likely going to check into the
Speaker 1: nearest mental institution.
Speaker 2: That makes sense.
Speaker 1: That's just my personality. Let's just do it now. We
Speaker 1: got to do it now.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, do you have regrets about the way
Speaker 3: it went down?
Speaker 1: No, But to say that I haven't or still sometimes
Speaker 1: greed would be a lie too. I think it can
Speaker 1: be both, you know. I know that I need to
Speaker 1: cut off basically both divorces in order for me to
Speaker 1: be able to see what I see in the mirror
Speaker 1: and actually like the person I see. Yeah, and I
Speaker 1: think that though it happened quickly, this was not just
Speaker 1: quickly quick decisions. This was stuff lingering inside of me
Speaker 1: for many, many years.
Speaker 3: You know, I'm guessing hoping therapy.
Speaker 1: Oh, I've been in therapy since I was since I
Speaker 1: saw my dad with another woman when I was two.
Speaker 1: So I haven't stopped.
Speaker 2: I met two years and years and years. I can't
Speaker 2: imagine life without No.
Speaker 1: Even my parents are like, you're still in therapy. I'm like, hey, listen,
Speaker 1: that generation, stop it, you know, Like, I don't think
Speaker 1: there's I think when you think you're good is when
Speaker 1: you need to go to therapy.
Speaker 2: Actually, you know, And even the days I had therapy
Speaker 2: today and I was like, not in the mood, of course,
Speaker 2: not right, it's work, And like even the days in
Speaker 2: the mood, yeah, it's I need therapy. It's so cathartic.
Speaker 2: When something actually happens in my week, I think, I
Speaker 2: feel like, oh my god, I can't wait to get whatever.
Speaker 1: A non biased opinion is. So it's vital. But also
Speaker 1: to be able to build and create and save tools
Speaker 1: of how you can deal or instead of react, respond
Speaker 1: to something is something that money can't buy, right, Like
Speaker 1: that's that is what I mean by like, it's like
Speaker 1: physical health, Like people you can't just work out it
Speaker 1: one day and think you're gonna stay whatever snatched or
Speaker 1: get even snatched, not even close. It's all consistency. And
Speaker 1: yet people are like it's too expensive to me when
Speaker 1: you say that you don't want to invest in yourself,
Speaker 1: like that to me is crazy.
Speaker 2: Especially now I feel like there's so many different.
Speaker 1: Chat GPTs killing it with a therapy supposedly. Really, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: it's crazy.
Speaker 2: That's I don't know why. I feel like that's hard
Speaker 2: for me, I can't imagine.
Speaker 3: That's like I don't know as rezoom, but I need that.
Speaker 3: I need her.
Speaker 2: I need that human who is who I can see
Speaker 2: on her face and she can see on mine.
Speaker 1: I have to say that my therapist. I mean, you know,
Speaker 1: there a lot of people are a little bit nervous
Speaker 1: about it. But at the end, at the end of
Speaker 1: the day, this is where we're heading, right, So like
Speaker 1: we can't fight AI, so instead let's just see what
Speaker 1: it can do. And you know, I remember my therapist
Speaker 1: saying that she had a client who couldn't get a
Speaker 1: hold of her one night and he used chat GBT
Speaker 1: because he needed answers to it and it worked.
Speaker 2: Yeah, speaking of working and working on yourself, how about
Speaker 2: Jessica Simpson.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know, she's creating a sexy lingerie line. She
Speaker 1: looks fabulous.
Speaker 2: I actually she got a little bit of blowback online.
Speaker 2: I think about her. I understand right, well, I mean right,
Speaker 2: people are just mean.
Speaker 1: And oh yeah, even even worse when you're actually it's like,
Speaker 1: you know, you gain weight, you get, you get and
Speaker 1: I I mean and I definitely experienced that when I
Speaker 1: was on the show. Then you lose weight and I'm
Speaker 1: experiencing it now where people are just so horribly mean,
Speaker 1: Like it's even.
Speaker 2: Worse people are mean to you. I mean, you're so
Speaker 2: my god, you.
Speaker 1: See to go on my tip, look at my Instagram,
Speaker 1: like you just see comments. It's just actually I've stopped now.
Speaker 1: I've done a lot of therapy about it though, too.
Speaker 1: But it's like, you know, I'm choosing to be in
Speaker 1: this business, right, It's all a choice, and so therefore
Speaker 1: I think for me, I'm such a people pleaser that
Speaker 1: I want everyone to love me. But that's just not reality.
Speaker 2: Right, I've learned that the hard way, So right, I'll
Speaker 2: do yeah, right. I mean, she looks she's so hot,
Speaker 2: she always has been. I was also disappointed about that
Speaker 2: when I heard about that separation. You little, I don't
Speaker 2: know anything about him, but I thought she looked happy.
Speaker 2: I mean I remember her back with Nick what's his name, lache? Yes,
Speaker 2: but like she this guy, he was so handsome and
Speaker 2: they have these dorable kids, and it's always like, what
Speaker 2: but what do you know? Do you know anything about?
Speaker 1: I just I just remember that she's sober now, so
Speaker 1: I think that again, you know, the alcohol was played
Speaker 1: that third person that is never ends in a good way.
Speaker 1: And because if you don't have control over it, right
Speaker 1: then it's then it gets ugly sometimes.
Speaker 3: I'm sure, when did she get sober?
Speaker 2: Do you now? Yeah?
Speaker 1: A few years back she gets sober.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, Well she's she's ready to start dating again.
Speaker 1: Good for her, and she's forty five. She looks great
Speaker 1: and she won't have an issue with that. I mean,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I will never do dating apps, so
Speaker 1: I don't think she would either.
Speaker 2: Hard for you guys, but I think you guys celebrities
Speaker 2: when it's time to start that process again.
Speaker 1: I mean I haven't done it so because it just
Speaker 1: sounds is overwhelming. I'm just like that sounds horrible, right.
Speaker 1: I still think like the old fashioned way, like if
Speaker 1: you have a friend, you know what I mean, Like
Speaker 1: so that I believe is still out there.
Speaker 2: I mean, how would you do dating apps?
Speaker 1: It would be like I can't.
Speaker 2: I just they do have to. They have like celebrity
Speaker 2: ones or something. They have raya righte.
Speaker 1: But again, I'm looking for something a little more deeper
Speaker 1: than just going and swiping through what somebody looks like, right,
Speaker 1: because if that was the case, I probably not even
Speaker 1: end up with the right person, because I'm just judging
Speaker 1: you by the cover.
Speaker 2: Yes, that's a huge That is a huge problem for
Speaker 2: young people right now is that they are they are
Speaker 2: not going out and having the face to face and
Speaker 2: the pheromones, and it.
Speaker 1: Is it's affecting the mental health.
Speaker 2: Yes. I read a lot about this, specifically with the
Speaker 2: boys that they are. Yeah, and but they also don't
Speaker 2: learn rejection, and they don't and you know, you have
Speaker 2: to be.
Speaker 1: Able to eye contact, shake a hand, yeah, and then.
Speaker 2: And then if you're rejected, it's okay, you go out
Speaker 2: the next night and you or whatever it is. And
Speaker 2: so yeah, social media, we can just go. That's a
Speaker 2: whole other episode. But listen, she has got some apparently
Speaker 2: she's very into Leopards. She's got some sexy lingerie. Listen.
Speaker 3: She was a shoe maven. Look what she did with shoes.
Speaker 1: I mean, I have Jessica Simpson shoes. Do you so?
Speaker 2: Do I?
Speaker 1: Yes, they're great, They're actually really comfortable. She understood shed.
Speaker 1: She definitely got the memo. With the platform and the stiletto,
Speaker 1: you balance that out. You can run miles in them.
Speaker 2: I don't. I don't. I can't wear high heels and
Speaker 2: we'll Actually, you have a shoe line I created for
Speaker 2: this very reason. But even though even my own shoes
Speaker 2: that are three heels. But do you have a platform.
Speaker 2: I know a platform is huge. Nope, it's not a platform.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but sometimes you don't want to wear platforms. They
Speaker 1: look a little hookery.
Speaker 2: I agree. I just think about the way you guys,
Speaker 2: how your feet lasted from the years and years. I've
Speaker 2: got pretty ass feet.
Speaker 1: I don't know anybody else, but my feet look like
Speaker 1: I could be a foot model. And I think it's
Speaker 1: because I never dance barefoot. I don't do that, really,
Speaker 1: I can't. I came out of my mom's womb with
Speaker 1: dances with three and a half inch stiletto heels. Like
Speaker 1: my calves are sore if I don't wear heels so
Speaker 1: because if shortened, yes, yes, that's unbelievable. But like I
Speaker 1: but all these kids, you know, they're dancing barefoot, They're
Speaker 1: dancing and sneakers like I can't. Like I was, I
Speaker 1: just was trained in a different era.
Speaker 2: Your whole body moves according to knowing.
Speaker 1: Rights, Like how do you dance in and feel feminist?
Speaker 1: It's just I can't do it. It's a whole thing.
Speaker 1: It's a whole thing interesting.
Speaker 2: Well, I mean, listener, she's as good at lingerie as
Speaker 2: gon Shoes or her team. Yes, yeah right, I mean
Speaker 2: a lot of She talks about a lot of leopard,
Speaker 2: she said. She she likes the even her furniture is leopard.
Speaker 2: I think her grandmother. It's her own version of beige.
Speaker 1: I don't know about lingerie leopard. It's already kind of
Speaker 1: racy as as it is. And by the way, it's
Speaker 1: just a trend. We are soon going to be over
Speaker 1: this animal print, I promise you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I hope not, because I'm going to Bravocon
Speaker 2: a few weeks and I bought this ridiculously expensive leopard
Speaker 2: in Trasta.
Speaker 1: I love me adulta. I love a red and a
Speaker 1: leopard always adult.
Speaker 2: Yes, I got you.
Speaker 1: Watch the Charlie Sheen documentary. I did.
Speaker 2: I have to. I'm dying too. It's so good. It's
Speaker 2: so good. Round of applause for him.
Speaker 1: I mean I had to watch it because I just
Speaker 1: loved him as a human being when I met him.
Speaker 2: He's a good guy, really well, he seems it, even
Speaker 2: when he was, you know, in his winning phase, in
Speaker 2: the Wackadoudley phase. No, I still.
Speaker 1: But it's just like I can relate to him, like
Speaker 1: there is something very powerful and he does reveal quite
Speaker 1: a lot of different things that I never knew about
Speaker 1: him that makes me love him even more.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah, well, you know, it's funny watching it.
Speaker 2: Also the Denise Richards and him in the way that
Speaker 2: she even I saw this clip where she talked about
Speaker 2: how she had a feeling he had HIV before. Did
Speaker 2: you see that. I mean, obviously the whole.
Speaker 1: Thing, but I know Denise because she did Dancing with
Speaker 1: the Stars, so yeah, and she's such a sweet soul too.
Speaker 1: It's like and she still loves you can tell she
Speaker 1: has so much love for him, Like she still gets
Speaker 1: very emotional. And I think when she did dancing this
Speaker 1: was at the height of when they split or they
Speaker 1: had just split, and it was tough for her. You know,
Speaker 1: it's tough. It's just tough, Like the divorce is one thing,
Speaker 1: and then starting something new and like having it take
Speaker 1: up a lot of time is tough as well.
Speaker 2: So I don't think she has so much love for
Speaker 2: her her ex X. Yeah, her last X Aaron. I
Speaker 2: wouldn't either me neither just looks so horrible, right, It
Speaker 2: looks really shady. I know he is on his part
Speaker 2: one hundred percent. I mean, I don't know if you so,
Speaker 2: if you didn't watch Beverly Hills the House, watch a
Speaker 2: little bit, a little bit, there's that one. Well they
Speaker 2: show the clip a lot where they're walking out of
Speaker 2: this party and he says something about how he's going
Speaker 2: to crush their holding hands, say another thing and I'll
Speaker 2: crush your hand or something really scary. No, I hope
Speaker 2: him not allegedly, but it's not really allegedly.
Speaker 1: Was on Well, if it was on the show, but I.
Speaker 2: Hope, I don't know.
Speaker 3: If that was exactly something about something violent.
Speaker 1: Well they can use that against him.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so that was really and I'm sure that by the.
Speaker 1: Way, who is this person, like obviously I don't know.
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know, I don't know him. But
Speaker 1: this is just a classic person that somebody marries who's
Speaker 1: really famous and is known trying to, you know, be
Speaker 1: set for life because of this. Supposedly she cheated or
Speaker 1: it doesn't matter though in California, right, it doesn't matter
Speaker 1: if you cheated.
Speaker 2: So, like what he's saying is rel I was wondering
Speaker 2: about that because I think again in Jersey. It's like,
Speaker 2: why because he's bringing in now all these witnesses.
Speaker 3: To talk about the fact that she cheated. Why does it?
Speaker 1: But it doesn't matter, right, So the judges is gonna
Speaker 1: laugh in his face like he can say this all
Speaker 1: he wants. It doesn't It's not the audience that's voting, right, Like,
Speaker 1: what are you doing?
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's bringing in so let's see.
Speaker 1: He's bringing in. I don't know why. What's she well,
Speaker 1: Charlie and Brandy, I don't know how she's.
Speaker 2: Brandyrdy Glanville said that she had an affair with Denise Richards.
Speaker 2: I don't know if it was while she was married
Speaker 2: and maybe I don't remember, but yes, that they I
Speaker 2: think it was like a one night.
Speaker 1: Situationd married in California.
Speaker 2: I don't know, but I know that and I don't
Speaker 2: It might have been while she was married to this guy.
Speaker 2: But apparently they had like a whole thing, and Brandy
Speaker 2: claimed that Denise came on to her or something. Again,
Speaker 2: I hope I'm not misspeaking, but they had definitely, she
Speaker 2: definitely said that they had an affair.
Speaker 1: Well, I remember when this whole thing about her doing only.
Speaker 2: Fans only fans only fans.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, that's what I should do. No, I'm kidding,
Speaker 1: that's your feet. I do have some weirdos following me,
Speaker 1: always asking me about my feet. It's the most weird
Speaker 1: people have foot fetish.
Speaker 2: That weird right there.
Speaker 3: I mean, no judgment, he's bringing in, No judgment, amen,
Speaker 3: But who else is he he's bringing in?
Speaker 2: But he would he would photograph her.
Speaker 1: So there's a part of me that thinks that he
Speaker 1: actually liked the fact that Brandy and her got together
Speaker 1: at that at that point. If if that's what it
Speaker 1: was now, I don't know. I think it's a bump.
Speaker 1: I think it's a stupid excuse. But if they did
Speaker 1: get married in California, the judge is not going to
Speaker 1: allow for these people to even step onto the stand
Speaker 1: here because it's irrelevant, right.
Speaker 2: Doesn't matter exactly. I think that, let's see, he had
Speaker 2: actually a restraining order against it, So I think he's
Speaker 2: he is f U c k ed. Yes, Yes, I
Speaker 2: wonder and listen. I can only hope that there was
Speaker 2: a prenup. I can't imagine in this day.
Speaker 1: And age, I would hope. So I hope she definitely.
Speaker 1: I don't know if he would have signed it though,
Speaker 1: you know, you never know, and I don't know.
Speaker 2: I think sometimes well.
Speaker 1: Especially when you're doing it, when you when you the
Speaker 1: woman is doing it, you know.
Speaker 2: And when you fall madly in love. I think a
Speaker 2: lot of women make that mistake.
Speaker 1: But you would think Denise would learn her lesson. She's smart.
Speaker 1: She's a smart woman, yes she is. But if he is,
Speaker 1: like sometimes when you're in a relationship, it gets foggy.
Speaker 2: This one is. This one is scary. It is scary.
Speaker 1: It's every red flags everywhere, right, So not good. I
Speaker 1: just hope she's safe. That's all that really matters at
Speaker 1: the end of the day.
Speaker 2: And he violated the restraining order. That's scary. Yeah, it is.
Speaker 1: He's he's not going to win this. I can almost
Speaker 1: bet my right ass cheek and.
Speaker 2: What can it? Was he their kids though, are not
Speaker 2: The two daughters are Charlie's and then she has an
Speaker 2: adopted daughter. I don't know if he's.
Speaker 1: He's got kids too. I think a it is like
Speaker 1: two girls. I think.
Speaker 2: So he's calling in all these witnesses. Have you ever
Speaker 2: been like, you've ever done anything like that?
Speaker 1: I mean, I mean I was, I was definitely testified
Speaker 1: against my molester when I was nine. But that's as
Speaker 1: far as I that's as far nothing to do with
Speaker 1: as an adults.
Speaker 2: Know. I have to take a beat. I'm so sorry
Speaker 2: that that happened to you.
Speaker 1: It's so casual for me because I've said it publicly
Speaker 1: so many times.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry.
Speaker 1: I know you don't know, so thank you.
Speaker 3: Don't be sorry, I'm I'm sorry.
Speaker 2: And how horrible, how horrible. So yeah, this one, that
Speaker 2: one is not good, not that any of them are good,
Speaker 2: but particularly scary sounds like to me.
Speaker 1: It just doesn't sound. I mean the fact that you
Speaker 1: when anyone files a restraining order, that's definitely not that
Speaker 1: that is a sign to the outside world that you know,
Speaker 1: she may not be safe.
Speaker 2: Agreed.
Speaker 1: So I hope she has really good friends and I
Speaker 1: and I hope that she feels safe wherever she is.
Speaker 2: You know, you have the secret wish that maybe that
Speaker 2: like her and Charlie will come.
Speaker 1: I don't. It's kind of it's kind of like Jennifer
Speaker 1: Gardner and Ben. I just want them to be good
Speaker 1: friends because I don't I believe that they're just first
Speaker 1: of all, I mean, I think Charlie's he has been sober,
Speaker 1: but still, I just there's so many skeletons. They're an
Speaker 1: ex for a reason. Believe me, I married in my ex,
Speaker 1: so he split for like ten years and then we reunited.
Speaker 1: It's just like they're an x for a reason. Though
Speaker 1: I still have I wish him all like the best again,
Speaker 1: it's just not like, why go back, Let's move forward,
Speaker 1: except in your case it seems to work.
Speaker 2: You. Thank you. I'm glad to see that he's come
Speaker 2: out of that wild time in life that he led.
Speaker 2: I mean, an addiction is scary, it's a disease. Think
Speaker 2: about Matthew Ferry all the time, and you know, I
Speaker 2: think he talks about I'm not sure. I saw him
Speaker 2: also on Bill Maher. I feel like he was talking
Speaker 2: about miracle that he's alive.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah no.
Speaker 2: But the amount if I watched.
Speaker 1: This documentary twice because it was just so good and
Speaker 1: it was eye opening, and I just wanted to make
Speaker 1: sure I hung on, like I just wanted to make
Speaker 1: sure I saw everything because what he revealed with the amount,
Speaker 1: I mean, his drug dealer was on this documentary, like
Speaker 1: saying he couldn't believe how much he was doing as
Speaker 1: far as drugs go and that he every single day
Speaker 1: he would wake up wondering if he was still alive,
Speaker 1: and he would go for weeks binge for a week,
Speaker 1: like weeks upon weeks upon weeks, and this guy never stopped.
Speaker 1: And the fact that he's still alive is just a miracle.
Speaker 2: When I did see him on Bill Maher, he's also
Speaker 2: he's very eloquent, he's very self deprecating. He's just so likable.
Speaker 1: Oh he is. But whatever, his life changing is hard, right,
Speaker 1: Like you're not comfortable when you're making life changes.
Speaker 2: Right, Wow, incredible. So that's also to their episode. You
Speaker 2: and I are going to have to follow up in
Speaker 2: a lot.
Speaker 1: Oh there's lots of yeah, lots of different ways we
Speaker 1: could go.
Speaker 2: So we talk about my.
Speaker 1: Ex partner on Dancing with the Stars, Ryan Lochtey. I
Speaker 1: danced with that guy.
Speaker 2: You dance with everybody.
Speaker 1: I have twenty I guess I did twenty seven seasons.
Speaker 2: Holy shit, I know.
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, hence the retirement. My hips can no
Speaker 1: longer hip.
Speaker 2: I can even imagine. Tell me about Ryan, and tell
Speaker 2: me about because now he's going through.
Speaker 1: So when I danced with him, he had just you know,
Speaker 1: the Olympics. Obviously, we also had protesters that like came
Speaker 1: onto the dance floor and we thought they had guns
Speaker 1: and they were gonna blow our heads off.
Speaker 2: It was insanity.
Speaker 1: Like during the live show, I've never seen our security
Speaker 1: guard shout out to David tackle somebody so quickly.
Speaker 3: What was What was the scandal I'm sorry for my mate?
Speaker 2: Was the Olympics funeral?
Speaker 1: I can't even tell. I mean it was I don't
Speaker 1: really know one hundred percent, and I don't want.
Speaker 2: He lied like he didn't or something.
Speaker 1: Yes, but he was also intoxicated, and I'm not making
Speaker 1: any excuses he should not have lied. But if you
Speaker 1: were to meet Ryan, he is very so. He's such
Speaker 1: a sweet man, he really is. He could not like
Speaker 1: at first, I was like, oh great and getting another
Speaker 1: controversial figure and this is gonna it's this guy just
Speaker 1: gonna be lazy. No, he worked so hard and he
Speaker 1: is so vulnerable, and he just trusted me in the
Speaker 1: process and for me as the best dance partner ever,
Speaker 1: I don't care what your dance ability is. If I
Speaker 1: like you as a person, I'm going to invest also
Speaker 1: so much into you.
Speaker 2: Right, You've got to write a book.
Speaker 1: You have got I did, I already, but in twenty eleven.
Speaker 1: We've got a chapter two coming up here soon because
Speaker 1: it's so there's so much to talk about.
Speaker 2: I got to get your book. Wait, what's it called?
Speaker 1: Well, no, this was this is back in twenty eleven
Speaker 1: before there was even audible, so this was called Dancing Lessons.
Speaker 1: How Dancing has shaped my life? But yeah, it's been.
Speaker 1: It's been a whirlwind for sure. I mean, the show
Speaker 1: has changed my life and it's been so amazing. And
Speaker 1: with that though, has been so many life lessons, and
Speaker 1: this one included with Ryan. He had just met Kayla
Speaker 1: literally when we just started dancing, right, and then I
Speaker 1: believe got her pregnant. Also during this season, I think,
Speaker 1: and look he was. He was absolutely in love with her.
Speaker 1: He he basically took me and step by step he goes,
Speaker 1: this is how I'm gonna propose to her. This was
Speaker 1: like week six of the competition, and he was so
Speaker 1: in love with her. And I just recently when I
Speaker 1: had my Dancing with the Stars it's called Sex Sizes
Speaker 1: and spray Tands podcast. That's no longer happening, but he
Speaker 1: was on and they seemed fine. So when I heard
Speaker 1: about this, This was shocking right for me, that.
Speaker 2: He has he has I guess he already has somebody
Speaker 2: else that he's trying to.
Speaker 1: I mean, there's a common denominator here. Would you like
Speaker 1: to say it?
Speaker 2: Yes? You? Well, you say it? Yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean I'm not saying all men. I'm not saying
Speaker 1: all men.
Speaker 2: But like, I think it's just the way we're made.
Speaker 2: You think that it's like that just men are not
Speaker 2: made from coxy?
Speaker 1: Yeah, like what is the book called men are from mars?
Speaker 2: Women are? Right?
Speaker 1: I just think that's what it is like and and
Speaker 1: some people can handle it and some people can't and
Speaker 1: I can't. So therefore I'm single.
Speaker 2: Right Listen, who knows what you're not going to? I again,
Speaker 2: if I'm a bet and girl, you're not going to
Speaker 2: be single forever.
Speaker 1: But I'm okay. I've never been so happy content in
Speaker 1: my life. There's no drama.
Speaker 2: Maybe you will, but I feel like I was able
Speaker 2: to get past. We were both able to get past
Speaker 2: the infantellity. You do know is very rare, but you
Speaker 2: guys both admitted it right one hundred percent.
Speaker 1: That's the thing when you don't take ownership and you
Speaker 1: or you flip flop back and forth in guest light.
Speaker 1: That's when I don't I can forgive the act of
Speaker 1: I know I can do that.
Speaker 2: That's what happened with us. I mean, it was it
Speaker 2: was the It was an act. It wasn't a relationship.
Speaker 2: I don't know how I would have felt if it
Speaker 2: had been a relationship, if it was yeah, yeah, and
Speaker 2: then it was and then it was me And then
Speaker 2: we both separated and we had we did have relationships
Speaker 2: and obviously came back together.
Speaker 1: What was it that made you want to get back together?
Speaker 1: And how did it work out? Timing wise?
Speaker 2: We just never wanted to get divorced like I would
Speaker 2: I always I tell the story on the show, But
Speaker 2: I was like I was seeing someone else, He was
Speaker 2: seeing someone else. It was just this absolute sadness like
Speaker 2: the kids. My daughter would call be like Daddy's being mean,
Speaker 2: and I was like, you think that you're gonna call
Speaker 2: me and complain about your father, Honey, you got the
Speaker 2: wrong number? Okay, you are. You are blessed. And then
Speaker 2: we would talk about separating and we I trusted him
Speaker 2: so completely. I knew he wasn't gonna, you know, dick
Speaker 2: me over, and I knew he wanted to get back together,
Speaker 2: and I would you know, we were both with other people,
Speaker 2: and I would tell my boyfriend at the time, I'm
Speaker 2: going to mediation, and I was like meeting my husband
Speaker 2: at Chili's, Like, so.
Speaker 3: You're cheating on your boyfriend with your husband.
Speaker 2: It was just it was all interesting.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I mean, do you think that that like
Speaker 1: seeing him with another woman and him seeing you with
Speaker 1: another man? You know, you know, you don't know what
Speaker 1: you have till you lose it type thing like was
Speaker 1: it was it a clear comparison as to like you
Speaker 1: should have never.
Speaker 2: The other guy, the guy that I was involved with
Speaker 2: was was very nice and very and and he was
Speaker 2: involved with that she had a couple of like relationships
Speaker 2: when we were separated. So I don't think it was
Speaker 2: a matter of a matter of that. It was just
Speaker 2: I just missed him. I missed him. Yeah, I mean
Speaker 2: it's very rare you hear this.
Speaker 3: You know, I know, I feel very very lucky. And
Speaker 3: looking back.
Speaker 1: At it, you hold any resentment like for any of it.
Speaker 2: No, I was a willing participant in what we do,
Speaker 2: and even he so he was un faithful first, but
Speaker 2: I was also checked out in this way checked out,
Speaker 2: like just like I was, like the women in my
Speaker 2: town we would all go out on Thursday nights and
Speaker 2: like sport with guys even but I'm talking about a
Speaker 2: lot of married women at that time, and we go
Speaker 2: out and we drink and we'd flirt, we get all
Speaker 2: dressed up, and I think I was steps away from
Speaker 2: it being me, son't.
Speaker 1: I mean, I guess it doesn't really matter first first first,
Speaker 1: at the end of the day, like you said earlier,
Speaker 1: it's deeper than all of the action, right, Like, it's
Speaker 1: so much deeper. I love that you take accountability over
Speaker 1: over your stuff. I think that is that you know
Speaker 1: it takes a lot so therapy. I know that's the
Speaker 1: only way to heal, you know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think still this day and then we'll wrap
Speaker 2: it up about me is not about me, but we
Speaker 2: feel both. I don't have any resembment because I think
Speaker 2: we just both feel very lucky. It doesn't happen a
Speaker 2: lot that you can find each other again.
Speaker 1: But I think holding yourself accountable, I can forgive anybody
Speaker 1: that does this, like you know what I mean, Like
Speaker 1: it's bad.
Speaker 2: I'm very good at it, and I'm assuming he is too, right, Yes,
Speaker 2: he certainly is he always was?
Speaker 1: Yeah? So and Ryan of Ryan. I mean, look, currently
Speaker 1: Ryan is undermining Kayla as the mother of their children,
Speaker 1: as on multiple occasions he has brought his pair more
Speaker 1: of only a couple months to the minor children's school
Speaker 1: to have lunch.
Speaker 2: I guess, but I don't know I would appreciate that
Speaker 2: I would lose my ship.
Speaker 1: Yes, And and Kayla seems too though she you know,
Speaker 1: I never really got a chance to know her as much,
Speaker 1: but she seemed really sweet. He loved he definitely loved her.
Speaker 1: But it was quick, this is what I mean. Like
Speaker 1: they weren't dating like and I mean, look, I'm not
Speaker 1: going to put societal expectations on people because I hate
Speaker 1: them myself. But when I tell you, they just met
Speaker 1: and then they fell into this like it was quit.
Speaker 1: I mean within a span we didn't even make it
Speaker 1: to the finals. So what I'm saying is that, like
Speaker 1: within a span of six weeks. Wow, right, So it
Speaker 1: just moved fast. And this is why people say, take
Speaker 1: your time.
Speaker 2: If that happened to my daughter, no judgment, I suppose,
Speaker 2: But if it's my daughter myself, I'm grabbing her by
Speaker 2: the hair and I'm like, I don't think so.
Speaker 1: But what if she was pregnant? What are you gonna do?
Speaker 2: That's a great question. I think that's exactly what I
Speaker 2: don't think so. I don't think so. But she wouldn't
Speaker 2: listen to me anyways, she's you know.
Speaker 1: She's gonna go try for some twins.
Speaker 2: Yes, exactly.
Speaker 3: I would just be very weary as an her.
Speaker 1: Every I know, right, but we live and learn, and
Speaker 1: we can't control anybody. You don't control anyone, unfortunately, I've tried,
Speaker 1: so have I.
Speaker 2: So have I.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but it sounds like she's pissed.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: He Ryan unilaterally pulled the children from school after sending
Speaker 2: him a message and then wouldn't answer. I guess he
Speaker 2: said where are you? And she he was She said
Speaker 2: where are you? And he wasn't answering or send Kayla
Speaker 2: a message and said I'm pulling them out.
Speaker 1: I mean also, I think he cheated, right. I think
Speaker 1: no one's saying this in this article, but like, I
Speaker 1: think this started it, which is not good. It's not
Speaker 1: okay and by the way, not good. But let's not forget, right, Like,
Speaker 1: let's just not forget. This is not just happening randomly.
Speaker 1: This is a reaction.
Speaker 2: But also, you know what, like this is what I
Speaker 2: always think that would be nice if you had some
Speaker 2: respect for the marriage, if you had some respect for
Speaker 2: like like you know.
Speaker 1: But you think men think like that. I don't think
Speaker 1: you think like that.
Speaker 2: I agree, I think women, But I don't think a
Speaker 2: lot of times women do either, because the anger so
Speaker 2: overwhelming that you lose your Yes, you lose, you lose
Speaker 2: whatever you saw in the person originally that was good
Speaker 2: and you as opposed to saying, listen, we had this
Speaker 2: this sacred thing or this sacred time and and but
Speaker 2: it's very rare, right.
Speaker 1: That I think that I have an answer, Like I
Speaker 1: have a solution is accountability and not ever veering away
Speaker 1: from it, believe me. Like it's when you don't and
Speaker 1: you gaslight the other person, that's when you create rage.
Speaker 1: And I think that if people in general people take accountability,
Speaker 1: like literally follow the twelve step program, it would make
Speaker 1: this world we live in today so peaceful.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, no, said I'm thinking through. Like if you're
Speaker 2: going through and you're so angry and the one party says.
Speaker 1: Listen, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 2: Yes, like let's let me even if you don't want
Speaker 2: to go there, like let me just say how sorry
Speaker 2: I am, you know, and how that would change the
Speaker 2: whole dynamic and problem very quickly, right quick?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean there'll be no wars happening right out,
Speaker 1: you know, I swear, yes, I agree. Can you imagine?
Speaker 1: Like and by the way, if it's just words, who
Speaker 1: cares at that moment?
Speaker 2: Like just do it? Just say it, like let your
Speaker 2: guard down, farm the other person and then really like right,
Speaker 2: find each other's humanity somehow.
Speaker 1: Can you imagine that is they?
Speaker 2: You know what we need to be running the world.
Speaker 2: That's the thing. So though, and Jensenslan Amen, Cheryl Burke
Speaker 2: for president, baby, I'll be your sure, yeah, next lifetime.
Speaker 2: We have enough problems anyway. This is so great. I
Speaker 2: absolutely loved every minute of it. I love talking to you.
Speaker 2: You're great. Me too, Me too. We're going to do
Speaker 2: it again. I could talk to you forever and maybe
Speaker 2: we will. We're friends.
Speaker 1: Let's do it, Yes, we are friends. Now you're stuck
Speaker 1: with me.
Speaker 2: I hope that our listeners, you know, found this not
Speaker 2: only interesting, but maybe even a little insightful.
Speaker 1: And therapeutic, like we're all human.
Speaker 2: Yes from therapy girls. Amen? And while we don't wish
Speaker 2: divorce or heartbreak on anyone. We want anyone at home
Speaker 2: that might be going through it right now to know
Speaker 2: that you are not alone.
Speaker 1: And in general, take accountability.
Speaker 2: Take accountability. That's our message, that is our I'm going
Speaker 2: to tattoo it on my forehead. I don't have a tattoo.
Speaker 2: I'd like it.
Speaker 1: I like you either, like accountability.
Speaker 2: Accountability is it's a long word though, but okay.
Speaker 3: Yeah, Well, you don't have any tattoos.
Speaker 1: None.
Speaker 2: Love that.
Speaker 1: I don't want one.
Speaker 2: I don't either. I don't like it, and I'm like.
Speaker 1: No, I'm so happy I don't have one.
Speaker 2: Yep, me too.
Speaker 1: But I am thinking about getting my ears periously. I
Speaker 1: only have one whole.
Speaker 2: Piers so I do I do I have?
Speaker 1: I have one now? I had actually fun facts so
Speaker 1: random in eighth grade. I was it was a dare
Speaker 1: and I pierced my own ear but then closed up.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Oh yeah, I've never been into a lot of piercings,
Speaker 2: a lot of tattoos, none of it.
Speaker 1: I don't like it. My mom got her eyeliner tattoos.
Speaker 2: She regrets it. Oh I did do that. I did
Speaker 2: do that, and now it's green and I have to
Speaker 2: go over for getting what absolutely true? Oh my god,
Speaker 2: no you listen. I mean, if you need some advice
Speaker 2: and you're going through a difficult relationship ending, we want
Speaker 2: to help, so call email us. All the infos in
Speaker 2: the show notes, follow us on socials. Make sure to
Speaker 2: rate and review the podcast I Do Part two and
Speaker 2: iHeartRadio podcasts where falling in love is the main objective.
Speaker 2: ERL Burke, I fallen in love a little with you today.
Speaker 1: I love you, I thank you.
Speaker 2: Yah yah h