1 00:00:03,320 --> 00:00:05,440 Speaker 1: Today's guest, Young Love and Zant. 2 00:00:05,600 --> 00:00:09,760 Speaker 2: What I call myself. I am a spiritual technician, anything 3 00:00:09,800 --> 00:00:12,119 Speaker 2: that has to do with your spirit, your soul, and 4 00:00:12,160 --> 00:00:12,640 Speaker 2: your mind. 5 00:00:13,560 --> 00:00:17,240 Speaker 1: Is there a secret, in your opinion to overcoming hardships 6 00:00:17,680 --> 00:00:19,079 Speaker 1: and coming out on the other. 7 00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:22,640 Speaker 2: Side, Well, the first secret is don't call them hardships. 8 00:00:23,560 --> 00:00:26,520 Speaker 2: My grandmother told me when I started talking about spirit 9 00:00:26,600 --> 00:00:28,720 Speaker 2: and meditating, she said, oh, You're going straight to hell. 10 00:00:29,200 --> 00:00:30,600 Speaker 2: So you know what I did. I went out and 11 00:00:30,600 --> 00:00:32,519 Speaker 2: bought a beautiful dress, so when I get there, I'll 12 00:00:32,560 --> 00:00:33,000 Speaker 2: be flying. 13 00:00:38,479 --> 00:00:41,960 Speaker 1: Hi. Everyone, welcome to another episode of Cheeky's and Chill. 14 00:00:42,120 --> 00:00:44,880 Speaker 1: I'm your host Cheeky's, and today's episode is about something 15 00:00:45,000 --> 00:00:49,519 Speaker 1: I'm very passionate about, spirituality and self help. And our 16 00:00:49,560 --> 00:00:51,479 Speaker 1: guest today is someone who has been working in the 17 00:00:51,560 --> 00:00:54,320 Speaker 1: space and helping people for a very long time. So 18 00:00:54,400 --> 00:00:57,160 Speaker 1: let's jump right into this episode of Cheeky's and Chill. 19 00:01:04,080 --> 00:01:06,880 Speaker 1: Sitting right in front of me today is Iyanla ven Zant. 20 00:01:07,240 --> 00:01:11,040 Speaker 1: She's incredible. She has a really interesting story, which we'll 21 00:01:11,040 --> 00:01:13,360 Speaker 1: hear more about in just a second, but first starter, 22 00:01:13,520 --> 00:01:16,119 Speaker 1: she's a spiritual life coach, host of the hit show 23 00:01:16,360 --> 00:01:19,800 Speaker 1: Iyanla Fixed My life, which I love. She's a New 24 00:01:19,880 --> 00:01:23,959 Speaker 1: York Times bestselling author, and she even has her own podcast. 25 00:01:24,160 --> 00:01:26,920 Speaker 1: It's called The r Spot. Well, first of all, thank 26 00:01:26,920 --> 00:01:29,840 Speaker 1: you so much. Thank you for your time for being here. 27 00:01:29,840 --> 00:01:31,360 Speaker 1: I'm so excited. I have to start off by saying 28 00:01:31,360 --> 00:01:33,240 Speaker 1: that I'm a huge fan. I have your apps, I 29 00:01:33,240 --> 00:01:36,360 Speaker 1: have The Awakening, I have my Matters. I'm a huge fan. 30 00:01:37,520 --> 00:01:39,000 Speaker 1: So thank you. It means a lot to me that 31 00:01:39,040 --> 00:01:41,880 Speaker 1: you're here. So, I don't know, let's start off with 32 00:01:42,280 --> 00:01:44,160 Speaker 1: your life. There's a lot of things that I didn't 33 00:01:44,240 --> 00:01:46,119 Speaker 1: know about you. Where did you grow up. 34 00:01:46,440 --> 00:01:49,160 Speaker 2: I grew up in Brooklyn. I hail from the Nation 35 00:01:49,280 --> 00:01:52,720 Speaker 2: of Brooklyn, and I am a New Yorker forever. I 36 00:01:52,720 --> 00:01:56,440 Speaker 2: will always be a New Yorker. I had an older brother, 37 00:01:56,680 --> 00:01:58,560 Speaker 2: I had an older sister. I was a baby of 38 00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:05,200 Speaker 2: a family, and so you know, classic poor black folk 39 00:02:05,400 --> 00:02:10,720 Speaker 2: upbringing in New York. My grandmother, who raised me from 40 00:02:10,760 --> 00:02:14,160 Speaker 2: the time I was five until I was eleven, was 41 00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:19,119 Speaker 2: a Native American to Slakey Cherokee, who was passing as 42 00:02:19,200 --> 00:02:21,960 Speaker 2: black because it was easier for her to be black 43 00:02:22,160 --> 00:02:24,080 Speaker 2: than it was for her to be a Native American. 44 00:02:24,800 --> 00:02:28,760 Speaker 2: In the late forties early fifties, and so she really 45 00:02:28,880 --> 00:02:32,720 Speaker 2: kind of hid her her heritage and her culture from 46 00:02:32,800 --> 00:02:35,760 Speaker 2: the world. She hid it in the church, she hid 47 00:02:35,800 --> 00:02:38,399 Speaker 2: it in the way she presented herself in the world. 48 00:02:38,480 --> 00:02:41,840 Speaker 2: But at home, you know, she taught me so many 49 00:02:41,880 --> 00:02:47,720 Speaker 2: things about my culture as a woman of color, Native culture, 50 00:02:47,760 --> 00:02:53,960 Speaker 2: indigenous culture. She told us that she couldn't read. She 51 00:02:54,040 --> 00:02:59,200 Speaker 2: never went to school, but she read the Bible and 52 00:02:59,280 --> 00:03:03,200 Speaker 2: she would read the newspaper. And I would say to her, well, 53 00:03:03,240 --> 00:03:05,799 Speaker 2: if you can't read, how wire you what are you doing? 54 00:03:06,240 --> 00:03:10,520 Speaker 2: She if somebody told it to her, she remembered it, 55 00:03:11,240 --> 00:03:14,240 Speaker 2: and that's how she began to put words together and 56 00:03:14,360 --> 00:03:18,000 Speaker 2: could do simple sentences, very articulate. She would never know 57 00:03:18,120 --> 00:03:20,880 Speaker 2: she was a woman who couldn't actually well, she says, 58 00:03:20,919 --> 00:03:25,040 Speaker 2: she couldn't read, but she could put simple sentences together. 59 00:03:25,360 --> 00:03:28,480 Speaker 2: And it was not too long ago. I never saw 60 00:03:28,560 --> 00:03:32,560 Speaker 2: my grandmother write anything other than numbers. And she knew 61 00:03:32,560 --> 00:03:35,200 Speaker 2: how to sign her name, but I never saw her 62 00:03:35,280 --> 00:03:39,480 Speaker 2: write anything other than numbers. She never wrote anything down. 63 00:03:39,880 --> 00:03:41,200 Speaker 2: And she used to say, you got to have a 64 00:03:41,200 --> 00:03:43,360 Speaker 2: good memory. I don't have to write things down. I 65 00:03:43,360 --> 00:03:44,920 Speaker 2: got a good memory. You know. 66 00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:50,480 Speaker 1: That's actually better Probably having a good memory. Yeah, yeah, 67 00:03:50,520 --> 00:03:53,320 Speaker 1: When did you know that this was your calling? 68 00:03:53,440 --> 00:03:53,560 Speaker 2: Like? 69 00:03:53,880 --> 00:03:55,800 Speaker 1: Was it you think through your grandmother, like having those 70 00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:56,840 Speaker 1: conversations with her. 71 00:03:57,040 --> 00:04:02,080 Speaker 2: Absolutely not. I'm a criminal defense attorney. That's what Early 72 00:04:02,160 --> 00:04:05,400 Speaker 2: childhood education. I spent two weeks in the classroom with 73 00:04:05,440 --> 00:04:08,600 Speaker 2: about twenty five kindergarteners, and I said, Okay, just cut 74 00:04:08,640 --> 00:04:09,840 Speaker 2: my throat right now, let. 75 00:04:09,720 --> 00:04:12,760 Speaker 1: Me die, not for me. 76 00:04:15,240 --> 00:04:19,839 Speaker 2: Early Childhood Psychology and Education is my undergraduate degree. And 77 00:04:19,880 --> 00:04:22,159 Speaker 2: then I went to law school. I wanted to be 78 00:04:22,200 --> 00:04:25,159 Speaker 2: a nurse all my life. I wanted to wear the 79 00:04:25,160 --> 00:04:28,520 Speaker 2: white uniform. Years ago, nurses wore white uniforms and they 80 00:04:28,520 --> 00:04:32,120 Speaker 2: had little hats. But one day in nursing school, let 81 00:04:32,160 --> 00:04:33,960 Speaker 2: me know that I was going to have to dissect 82 00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:37,960 Speaker 2: the pig, and I left. That was he said, No, 83 00:04:39,320 --> 00:04:41,320 Speaker 2: I got through the frog in high school. 84 00:04:41,560 --> 00:04:43,480 Speaker 1: I did too. I was going to tell you that frog, 85 00:04:43,640 --> 00:04:44,360 Speaker 1: Thank god. 86 00:04:44,560 --> 00:04:47,000 Speaker 2: I don't know how I got through that. I remember 87 00:04:47,120 --> 00:04:51,080 Speaker 2: gagging and wrenching over the frog. But I was not 88 00:04:51,240 --> 00:04:53,560 Speaker 2: going to stick my hand down in a jar from 89 00:04:53,600 --> 00:04:55,919 Speaker 2: aldehyde and put out a baby pig. That was not 90 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:58,600 Speaker 2: ever going to happen in this lifetime. So I left 91 00:05:00,760 --> 00:05:03,880 Speaker 2: and I went to law school. When I was thirty two, 92 00:05:04,240 --> 00:05:07,680 Speaker 2: I graduated from college and I went to law school, 93 00:05:07,760 --> 00:05:10,040 Speaker 2: and I really thought I was going to be a lawyer, 94 00:05:10,720 --> 00:05:14,840 Speaker 2: and I wanted to be the black female Perry Mason, 95 00:05:15,880 --> 00:05:23,839 Speaker 2: get all my clients off. And as a criminal defense attorney, 96 00:05:23,880 --> 00:05:27,120 Speaker 2: you spent a lot of time in jail because that's 97 00:05:27,120 --> 00:05:31,240 Speaker 2: where your clients are. And since I had never been arrested, 98 00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:36,360 Speaker 2: I've been getting why am I in jail? Every day? 99 00:05:37,160 --> 00:05:41,120 Speaker 2: And so I left and had no clue what I 100 00:05:41,160 --> 00:05:44,480 Speaker 2: was going to do. It just kind of unfolded. As 101 00:05:44,520 --> 00:05:47,719 Speaker 2: I was collecting unemployment and a friend of mine asked 102 00:05:47,760 --> 00:05:50,679 Speaker 2: me to come in. Would I be willing to teach 103 00:05:50,839 --> 00:05:54,679 Speaker 2: life school skills life skills to women who were being 104 00:05:55,120 --> 00:05:59,440 Speaker 2: transitioned off of public assistance, which is exactly what happened 105 00:05:59,480 --> 00:06:02,320 Speaker 2: to me. So I went in and I started teaching 106 00:06:02,400 --> 00:06:07,159 Speaker 2: life skills, and my first book, Tapping the Power Within, 107 00:06:07,560 --> 00:06:10,480 Speaker 2: is the workbook that I wrote for the women that 108 00:06:10,520 --> 00:06:14,240 Speaker 2: I was teaching life skills to, And one step at 109 00:06:14,240 --> 00:06:16,800 Speaker 2: a time, it just kind of unfolded. I mean, what 110 00:06:17,279 --> 00:06:19,680 Speaker 2: do I do? What do I call? What I do? 111 00:06:19,920 --> 00:06:22,440 Speaker 2: What do I do that I would have to look 112 00:06:22,480 --> 00:06:28,440 Speaker 2: for it at a career fair. I don't know, you know, 113 00:06:28,640 --> 00:06:32,320 Speaker 2: I wasn't. I'm an author. I am a spiritual life 114 00:06:32,360 --> 00:06:35,880 Speaker 2: coach trained. I am a minister, you know, seminary trained 115 00:06:35,880 --> 00:06:40,680 Speaker 2: and ordained. What I call myself because I think it's 116 00:06:40,720 --> 00:06:44,120 Speaker 2: always best to define yourself and not to try to 117 00:06:44,160 --> 00:06:46,800 Speaker 2: fit into the boxes that people want to stick you in. 118 00:06:47,200 --> 00:06:47,320 Speaker 1: Oh. 119 00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:51,520 Speaker 2: Yes, I am a spiritual technician. If it has anything 120 00:06:51,600 --> 00:06:56,240 Speaker 2: to do with the human spirit, the human soul, and 121 00:06:56,400 --> 00:07:01,680 Speaker 2: connection to consciousness, I'm a technician a technology that's going 122 00:07:01,760 --> 00:07:08,560 Speaker 2: to support you in fixing, healing, repairing, aligning, expanding, growing, healing, 123 00:07:08,760 --> 00:07:11,680 Speaker 2: anything that has to do with your spirit, your soul, 124 00:07:11,840 --> 00:07:12,480 Speaker 2: and your mind. 125 00:07:13,640 --> 00:07:16,280 Speaker 1: Oh, just right up, my alley. That's exactly what I love. 126 00:07:16,800 --> 00:07:20,040 Speaker 1: You've been through so much since you were nine years old, 127 00:07:20,160 --> 00:07:23,360 Speaker 1: you know, And did you ever question maybe God or 128 00:07:23,400 --> 00:07:25,440 Speaker 1: the higher power of the universe, like why did this 129 00:07:25,520 --> 00:07:28,680 Speaker 1: happen to me? Did you ever have that moment? No, 130 00:07:30,680 --> 00:07:32,440 Speaker 1: that's great. 131 00:07:32,520 --> 00:07:34,560 Speaker 2: I didn't even know I was raped at nine. I 132 00:07:34,560 --> 00:07:37,680 Speaker 2: didn't know it was called rape until I was thirty. Oh, 133 00:07:37,800 --> 00:07:39,840 Speaker 2: I didn't even know. I didn't know what I mean, 134 00:07:39,960 --> 00:07:42,080 Speaker 2: it had never happened. I had never seen it. Nobody 135 00:07:42,080 --> 00:07:45,000 Speaker 2: ever talked about it. You know, as indigenous culture, you 136 00:07:45,040 --> 00:07:47,760 Speaker 2: don't talk about things like that exactly. And in the 137 00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:50,080 Speaker 2: black culture too, you know, you don't talk about it. 138 00:07:50,080 --> 00:07:53,119 Speaker 2: That's why so many girls and boys or young women 139 00:07:53,160 --> 00:07:56,920 Speaker 2: and young men suffer because this thing has happened and 140 00:07:56,960 --> 00:08:00,280 Speaker 2: it's horrible, and they don't feel free to talk about it, 141 00:08:00,520 --> 00:08:04,320 Speaker 2: so it becomes repetitive. That wasn't my case. It happened 142 00:08:04,320 --> 00:08:09,160 Speaker 2: one time I told and the results of me telling 143 00:08:09,880 --> 00:08:12,840 Speaker 2: about it were almost worse than if I hadn't said anything, 144 00:08:12,880 --> 00:08:16,000 Speaker 2: because the results were he called me a liar, and 145 00:08:16,280 --> 00:08:19,760 Speaker 2: nothing else was ever done. Nothing. So I grew up 146 00:08:19,960 --> 00:08:22,840 Speaker 2: believing that it's okay for people to treat me badly. 147 00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:26,280 Speaker 2: What happens to me doesn't matter. I'm not important. And 148 00:08:26,320 --> 00:08:30,720 Speaker 2: so those were lessons that I had to unlearn in 149 00:08:30,760 --> 00:08:34,360 Speaker 2: my life. And I didn't even because nothing was ever said, 150 00:08:35,240 --> 00:08:37,400 Speaker 2: and they don't do in my era, they didn't do 151 00:08:37,520 --> 00:08:43,160 Speaker 2: sex education. So I was like thirty years old looking 152 00:08:43,200 --> 00:08:45,400 Speaker 2: at a TV show and I said, well that happened 153 00:08:45,440 --> 00:08:49,120 Speaker 2: to me, Oh my god, I was raped. I didn't know. 154 00:08:49,480 --> 00:08:52,839 Speaker 2: I didn't know that's what you called it. So as 155 00:08:52,880 --> 00:08:55,360 Speaker 2: I said, I wanted to be a nurse. Nursing is 156 00:08:55,400 --> 00:08:58,880 Speaker 2: a healing profession. Nurses take care of you when you're 157 00:08:58,920 --> 00:09:03,320 Speaker 2: sick and you're not well, and that's what I do. 158 00:09:03,559 --> 00:09:05,720 Speaker 2: I just instead of doing it to your body, I 159 00:09:05,800 --> 00:09:07,280 Speaker 2: do it for your soul and your mind. 160 00:09:09,240 --> 00:09:12,480 Speaker 1: That's what I love. And you never held any resentment 161 00:09:12,679 --> 00:09:14,480 Speaker 1: or anything like did you ever feel you had to 162 00:09:15,120 --> 00:09:17,080 Speaker 1: forgive that person or it was just kind of like 163 00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:18,760 Speaker 1: a out of sight, out of mind situation. 164 00:09:19,800 --> 00:09:22,600 Speaker 2: By the time I realized that that was not a 165 00:09:22,760 --> 00:09:28,280 Speaker 2: normal thing to happen, I had to forgive myself for 166 00:09:29,600 --> 00:09:33,520 Speaker 2: everything that I told myself about it. I'm not important. 167 00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:37,240 Speaker 2: What happens to me doesn't matter. It's okay for people 168 00:09:37,320 --> 00:09:40,199 Speaker 2: to treat me badly. I can't talk about the things 169 00:09:40,200 --> 00:09:43,040 Speaker 2: that hurt me. I mean, I did that to myself. 170 00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:46,400 Speaker 2: Nobody told me anything. So by the time I understood 171 00:09:46,440 --> 00:09:49,240 Speaker 2: the power of forgiveness and what forgiveness was all about, 172 00:09:49,520 --> 00:09:52,120 Speaker 2: it wasn't even about forgiving him. Plus he was dead. 173 00:09:52,240 --> 00:09:54,679 Speaker 2: I was alive and I was suffering, and that's what 174 00:09:54,760 --> 00:09:55,800 Speaker 2: I wanted to heal up. 175 00:09:56,280 --> 00:09:58,760 Speaker 1: Mm hmm. That's what I always say. Forgiveness is a 176 00:09:58,760 --> 00:10:01,720 Speaker 1: gift for yourself. Yeah, it gives you, you know, like 177 00:10:01,800 --> 00:10:04,560 Speaker 1: the wings to fly into sore is how I feel. 178 00:10:04,920 --> 00:10:08,280 Speaker 1: I was actually sexually abused by my father. My dad 179 00:10:08,320 --> 00:10:11,800 Speaker 1: never admitted to it, he never asked for forgiveness. For 180 00:10:11,840 --> 00:10:13,240 Speaker 1: a long time, I wanted to hear it, you know, 181 00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:15,400 Speaker 1: I wanted to hear, yes, I did it, You're not 182 00:10:15,559 --> 00:10:18,640 Speaker 1: a liar. I'm sorry. He's in jail. He's going to 183 00:10:18,679 --> 00:10:20,360 Speaker 1: be there for another I don't know, seventeen years or 184 00:10:20,360 --> 00:10:22,480 Speaker 1: something like that. But now I'm like, you know what, 185 00:10:22,760 --> 00:10:24,839 Speaker 1: I because of that, the same thing I would think 186 00:10:24,880 --> 00:10:27,680 Speaker 1: I was. I was dirty, I'm not worthy. I so 187 00:10:27,760 --> 00:10:30,840 Speaker 1: many things that happen and or I thought, and yeah, 188 00:10:30,960 --> 00:10:32,040 Speaker 1: I mean, at the end of the day day, I'm 189 00:10:32,040 --> 00:10:35,160 Speaker 1: a forgive you, and I'm also forgive myself for thinking 190 00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:37,320 Speaker 1: those things and thinking that the things that you said 191 00:10:37,360 --> 00:10:40,440 Speaker 1: were correct, that I was a liar, you know, so right? AnyWho, 192 00:10:40,480 --> 00:10:42,560 Speaker 1: do you feel that everything happens for a reason? 193 00:10:42,960 --> 00:10:46,640 Speaker 2: Oh? Absolutely, I don't feel that that's universal law cause 194 00:10:46,679 --> 00:10:50,319 Speaker 2: and effect. Yeah. I think one of the hardest concepts 195 00:10:50,360 --> 00:10:53,160 Speaker 2: for people to get is that you know, we come 196 00:10:53,200 --> 00:10:56,280 Speaker 2: here and that part of us that is alive, that 197 00:10:56,480 --> 00:10:59,280 Speaker 2: soul knows what you need to learn and learn what 198 00:10:59,320 --> 00:11:02,200 Speaker 2: you need to do, not do. Knows your purpose, knows 199 00:11:02,240 --> 00:11:05,640 Speaker 2: your everything, and we're so busy out in the world 200 00:11:05,720 --> 00:11:09,120 Speaker 2: till we don't go in. One of the reasons I 201 00:11:09,120 --> 00:11:12,480 Speaker 2: can work with almost anybody around anything is because I've 202 00:11:12,480 --> 00:11:14,800 Speaker 2: been through most of it. So I'm not teaching you 203 00:11:14,840 --> 00:11:19,360 Speaker 2: from theory and pragmatism. I'm teaching you from experience, and 204 00:11:19,440 --> 00:11:23,520 Speaker 2: I continue to take it deeper and deeper. Everything is 205 00:11:23,800 --> 00:11:26,520 Speaker 2: exactly as it needs to be. Of course, the miracles 206 00:11:27,559 --> 00:11:30,240 Speaker 2: teaches that all things are lessons that God would have 207 00:11:30,360 --> 00:11:35,440 Speaker 2: us learn, So we're always learning, always learning. Once you 208 00:11:35,559 --> 00:11:40,120 Speaker 2: get that, it gets exciting. Well, my husband left me. 209 00:11:40,320 --> 00:11:45,559 Speaker 2: Well what am I learning today? Yeah, it's too but 210 00:11:45,760 --> 00:11:50,480 Speaker 2: I fell out. Oh what am I learning about this? Yeah? 211 00:11:50,679 --> 00:11:52,680 Speaker 1: That's what I always tell people, Like, you know what, 212 00:11:53,280 --> 00:11:56,160 Speaker 1: you're in a tight situation. You can't see the light 213 00:11:56,160 --> 00:11:57,760 Speaker 1: at the end of the tunnel, but it's kind of 214 00:11:57,760 --> 00:12:00,640 Speaker 1: like exactly that, like there you're going through that to 215 00:12:00,800 --> 00:12:05,320 Speaker 1: learn something about yourself about the situation. So okay, I'm good. 216 00:12:05,600 --> 00:12:14,920 Speaker 1: I think I'm on the right track. I have a 217 00:12:15,080 --> 00:12:17,320 Speaker 1: very odd question, and you don't have to answer it 218 00:12:17,440 --> 00:12:20,200 Speaker 1: if you don't want to, obviously, but do you drink 219 00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:21,760 Speaker 1: alcohol by any chance. 220 00:12:21,800 --> 00:12:25,360 Speaker 2: I absolutely don't. But let me tell you why my 221 00:12:25,400 --> 00:12:28,880 Speaker 2: mother was an alcoholic. Okay, so I think I drank 222 00:12:28,920 --> 00:12:31,160 Speaker 2: so much licking the wound, I didn't have to have 223 00:12:31,240 --> 00:12:33,640 Speaker 2: no more when I got in the physical body. Really, 224 00:12:34,480 --> 00:12:37,800 Speaker 2: I never, I have never, you know, when I was 225 00:12:37,840 --> 00:12:40,559 Speaker 2: a teenager, of course, you know, everybody goes out and 226 00:12:40,600 --> 00:12:44,320 Speaker 2: you're drinking. We used to drink sangria with fruit in it. 227 00:12:44,440 --> 00:12:48,760 Speaker 2: That was yah yah yeah yeah. So but I've never, 228 00:12:49,160 --> 00:12:53,000 Speaker 2: I've never. No, it's not my thing. And I smoked 229 00:12:53,000 --> 00:12:54,199 Speaker 2: a lot of happy flowers. 230 00:12:56,400 --> 00:12:58,040 Speaker 1: I love happy flowers. 231 00:12:57,559 --> 00:13:02,960 Speaker 2: O baby, I have smoked some happy flocks. When I 232 00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:05,439 Speaker 2: had my last JIB, I was twenty one years old, 233 00:13:05,920 --> 00:13:08,520 Speaker 2: it just you know, it's like it just went away 234 00:13:08,559 --> 00:13:12,240 Speaker 2: and I've never. I never touched it again. Now it's legal. 235 00:13:12,320 --> 00:13:14,240 Speaker 2: You know, back then we were buying a nickel bag 236 00:13:14,280 --> 00:13:17,040 Speaker 2: and hiding it in fifty two shopping bags under the bed. 237 00:13:18,320 --> 00:13:20,960 Speaker 1: And you, I mean, you fix so many people like 238 00:13:21,040 --> 00:13:23,280 Speaker 1: do you have a life coach? Do you have a 239 00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:25,480 Speaker 1: mentor or something that someone that helps you out? 240 00:13:25,800 --> 00:13:27,480 Speaker 2: Well, first of all, let me just say I don't 241 00:13:27,480 --> 00:13:30,040 Speaker 2: know what anybody else says. I haven't helped anybody. What 242 00:13:30,080 --> 00:13:33,880 Speaker 2: I've done is given people information and support so that 243 00:13:33,920 --> 00:13:37,240 Speaker 2: they can help themselves. I don't help you. I'm too 244 00:13:37,240 --> 00:13:40,720 Speaker 2: busy trying to help my own self. And you get 245 00:13:40,760 --> 00:13:42,959 Speaker 2: helped in the process of my healing. Good for you, 246 00:13:43,360 --> 00:13:47,440 Speaker 2: for you, I'm just trying. What has happened is throughout 247 00:13:47,480 --> 00:13:52,040 Speaker 2: my my healing process. I've taken copious notes, really taking copy. 248 00:13:52,160 --> 00:13:56,720 Speaker 2: I have notebooks and revelations and understandings. But I do 249 00:13:56,800 --> 00:13:59,720 Speaker 2: I have a coach. I have two coaches. I also 250 00:13:59,800 --> 00:14:05,080 Speaker 2: have of what I call a prayer partner, and I 251 00:14:05,120 --> 00:14:09,640 Speaker 2: have I don't know what Peter is. Peter is a coach. 252 00:14:09,840 --> 00:14:12,400 Speaker 2: He's a clinical psychologist, but I don't go to him 253 00:14:12,440 --> 00:14:16,280 Speaker 2: for therapy. We do coaching together. And then my greatest 254 00:14:16,320 --> 00:14:19,640 Speaker 2: coaches are those people that I've taught and trained, because 255 00:14:19,680 --> 00:14:23,000 Speaker 2: they keep me sharp when I'm going off the deep 256 00:14:23,080 --> 00:14:24,960 Speaker 2: end and they say, wait a minute, didn't you teach us? 257 00:14:25,160 --> 00:14:27,920 Speaker 2: Or don't you know? And when they repeat back to 258 00:14:28,000 --> 00:14:29,840 Speaker 2: me stuff that I've taught them, I just want to 259 00:14:29,840 --> 00:14:37,920 Speaker 2: punch him in the throat, you right in the throat. 260 00:14:38,240 --> 00:14:40,760 Speaker 2: You know, that's terrible when your students are teaching you 261 00:14:41,040 --> 00:14:45,520 Speaker 2: what you taught them. So didn't you say this right now? 262 00:14:45,600 --> 00:14:48,000 Speaker 2: This is how they usually said. They say, somebody once 263 00:14:48,080 --> 00:14:50,720 Speaker 2: told me, and then I know I'm getting ready for 264 00:14:50,720 --> 00:14:54,520 Speaker 2: the SmackDown. So yeah, but I do have two coaches 265 00:14:54,760 --> 00:14:56,280 Speaker 2: and a prayer partner. 266 00:14:56,680 --> 00:14:59,680 Speaker 1: I find myself a prayer partner. That's what I need. Yeah, 267 00:15:00,000 --> 00:15:02,280 Speaker 1: I always say this, I'm not a religious woman. I'm 268 00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:04,200 Speaker 1: very spiritual. I have a connection with God. I like 269 00:15:04,240 --> 00:15:07,920 Speaker 1: to meditate, and I feel like that's like my main coach. 270 00:15:08,040 --> 00:15:08,400 Speaker 1: But I do. 271 00:15:08,720 --> 00:15:12,760 Speaker 2: That is your religion if that's what you do. You know, 272 00:15:12,880 --> 00:15:17,000 Speaker 2: religion is people's beliefs and opinions about God's source, creator, 273 00:15:17,040 --> 00:15:18,960 Speaker 2: whatever you want to call it. That's all religion is. 274 00:15:19,000 --> 00:15:23,880 Speaker 2: It's people's opinions and the dogma or the theology that's 275 00:15:23,920 --> 00:15:26,840 Speaker 2: set up based on the faith path that you walk 276 00:15:27,280 --> 00:15:31,120 Speaker 2: is what you do based on that theology. All religion 277 00:15:31,320 --> 00:15:34,440 Speaker 2: is about how to get us in relationship with the 278 00:15:34,440 --> 00:15:39,200 Speaker 2: God of our understanding. So meditation, yoga, you know, for 279 00:15:39,280 --> 00:15:42,640 Speaker 2: some people it's tai chi. If that is what gets 280 00:15:42,680 --> 00:15:45,760 Speaker 2: you in connection with the creative of your understanding, then 281 00:15:45,760 --> 00:15:48,400 Speaker 2: that is your religion. I want people to really get 282 00:15:48,400 --> 00:15:50,600 Speaker 2: clear about that and stop saying I'm not religious, but 283 00:15:50,680 --> 00:15:54,320 Speaker 2: I'm spiritual. I meditate. Well, then you're religious, then I'm religious. 284 00:15:54,360 --> 00:15:57,440 Speaker 1: Yeah. My religion is called love and faith, right. 285 00:15:57,360 --> 00:16:01,360 Speaker 2: Okay, I'm in love the great religion that there is. 286 00:16:01,760 --> 00:16:04,320 Speaker 2: You know. I'm getting ready to teach a class. I 287 00:16:04,360 --> 00:16:08,280 Speaker 2: have a community I call the Spiritual Study Sanctuary, and 288 00:16:08,280 --> 00:16:10,760 Speaker 2: I'm getting ready to teach a class on how to 289 00:16:10,800 --> 00:16:15,640 Speaker 2: love the Bible from a metaphysical perspective, not a religious perspective, 290 00:16:16,240 --> 00:16:19,680 Speaker 2: because it is one of the most powerful treatise on 291 00:16:19,960 --> 00:16:24,720 Speaker 2: human development, character development, spiritual development. But because of the 292 00:16:24,760 --> 00:16:27,920 Speaker 2: way it's been used and weaponized or diminished or just 293 00:16:28,160 --> 00:16:33,200 Speaker 2: pigeonhole to be about Christianity, people missed the wisdom that 294 00:16:33,320 --> 00:16:37,320 Speaker 2: is in there, and there's so much wisdom in the scriptures. 295 00:16:38,640 --> 00:16:40,240 Speaker 1: I want to see if you can help me break 296 00:16:40,280 --> 00:16:43,320 Speaker 1: something down because I've tried to put it into words, 297 00:16:43,320 --> 00:16:45,040 Speaker 1: and I feel like I know what this means, but 298 00:16:45,120 --> 00:16:46,560 Speaker 1: I want to see if you can break it down 299 00:16:46,600 --> 00:16:50,040 Speaker 1: for our listeners. Actually, I think I heard Beyonce say it. 300 00:16:50,080 --> 00:16:52,000 Speaker 1: I think I'm pretty sure it was her what she said, 301 00:16:52,880 --> 00:16:54,680 Speaker 1: there's a little bit of God in all of us. 302 00:16:54,800 --> 00:16:58,680 Speaker 1: God lives in me as me and I try to 303 00:16:58,720 --> 00:17:01,080 Speaker 1: tell my grandmother that, and she's a very she's a 304 00:17:01,120 --> 00:17:05,080 Speaker 1: Christian woman, and she didn't understand. She didn't really like it. 305 00:17:05,400 --> 00:17:08,679 Speaker 1: She was like, no, how can you compare yourself to 306 00:17:08,760 --> 00:17:10,840 Speaker 1: I'm like, no, I didn't know how to explain it. 307 00:17:10,840 --> 00:17:12,399 Speaker 1: So I want to see if you can help me. 308 00:17:13,080 --> 00:17:16,920 Speaker 2: Well, Grandma's never gonna understand that unless she wants to. Okay, 309 00:17:17,600 --> 00:17:20,560 Speaker 2: my grandmother told me forever when I started talking about 310 00:17:20,640 --> 00:17:23,240 Speaker 2: spirit and meditating, she said, oh, you're going straight to hell. 311 00:17:23,480 --> 00:17:25,679 Speaker 2: That's when I'm going straight to hell. And so you 312 00:17:25,720 --> 00:17:27,080 Speaker 2: know what I did. I went out and bought a 313 00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:29,400 Speaker 2: beautiful dress. So when I get there, I'll be flying. 314 00:17:32,960 --> 00:17:35,520 Speaker 2: I just decided I'm not gonna be afraid of hell. 315 00:17:35,640 --> 00:17:37,680 Speaker 2: You see, I was married to a man who beat 316 00:17:37,800 --> 00:17:41,920 Speaker 2: me every day for nine years. That's hell. Leaving him 317 00:17:41,920 --> 00:17:44,080 Speaker 2: at three o'clock in the morning with three babies and 318 00:17:44,119 --> 00:17:47,920 Speaker 2: three shopping bags, that's hell. So wherever I'm going when 319 00:17:47,920 --> 00:17:50,919 Speaker 2: I leave this body, wherever I'm supposed to rest, I 320 00:17:50,960 --> 00:17:54,080 Speaker 2: want the party. So I love dress. I'm going to Hell. Okay, 321 00:17:54,119 --> 00:18:02,280 Speaker 2: I'm gonna look good. The thing is, And that is 322 00:18:02,520 --> 00:18:09,520 Speaker 2: part of the challenge with religiosity and Churchianity religiosity says 323 00:18:09,560 --> 00:18:14,240 Speaker 2: that somebody else tells you about your relationship with the 324 00:18:14,280 --> 00:18:18,359 Speaker 2: God of your understanding. Most of us inherited the God 325 00:18:18,440 --> 00:18:21,080 Speaker 2: we believe in. We didn't find it on our own. 326 00:18:21,520 --> 00:18:25,080 Speaker 2: And then Churchianity, where you've got to go and have 327 00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:29,320 Speaker 2: somebody else tell you how to be in relationship with 328 00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:32,680 Speaker 2: the God of your understanding. All of that teaches us 329 00:18:32,680 --> 00:18:36,919 Speaker 2: to pray to an external god. God is out there, 330 00:18:37,680 --> 00:18:39,919 Speaker 2: you know. In the Christian faith it's Jesus. He's on 331 00:18:40,000 --> 00:18:42,560 Speaker 2: the cross, and you know he's going to do it 332 00:18:42,640 --> 00:18:46,560 Speaker 2: for us. And it's such a dysfunctional level of codependence 333 00:18:47,200 --> 00:18:50,240 Speaker 2: where we're relying on Jesus to help us treat each 334 00:18:50,240 --> 00:18:53,240 Speaker 2: other nice. We don't do it because it's in we 335 00:18:53,280 --> 00:18:57,160 Speaker 2: grow the quality in a heart kindness, loving kindness, compassion. 336 00:18:57,440 --> 00:18:59,879 Speaker 2: We don't grow in a heart. We do it be 337 00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:03,760 Speaker 2: because we're trying to please Jesus. And that's a little 338 00:19:03,760 --> 00:19:06,679 Speaker 2: off I think to me anyway, I don't have no 339 00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:10,240 Speaker 2: problem with Jesus. Me and JC are cool. But when 340 00:19:10,280 --> 00:19:16,520 Speaker 2: you understand what he said, these things I have done, 341 00:19:16,560 --> 00:19:19,479 Speaker 2: you should do this and even greater, Well, how am 342 00:19:19,520 --> 00:19:22,840 Speaker 2: I going to do that? When he said it is 343 00:19:22,880 --> 00:19:25,639 Speaker 2: not I, but the spirit of the Father within me 344 00:19:25,840 --> 00:19:30,639 Speaker 2: that does the word. When he said I come that 345 00:19:30,720 --> 00:19:33,359 Speaker 2: you may have life and have it more abundantly, not 346 00:19:33,520 --> 00:19:36,200 Speaker 2: by waiting for me to do it for you, but 347 00:19:36,240 --> 00:19:39,240 Speaker 2: by you learning how to do what I did. What 348 00:19:39,359 --> 00:19:42,720 Speaker 2: did he do? He prayed a lot. He went away 349 00:19:42,760 --> 00:19:44,520 Speaker 2: a lot every now and then you read in the 350 00:19:44,560 --> 00:19:48,480 Speaker 2: Bible and said, Jesus went away. I wonder if he 351 00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:51,000 Speaker 2: was in a vacation club or something, because he was 352 00:19:51,040 --> 00:19:55,040 Speaker 2: always going. He was always going on. Why he went 353 00:19:55,119 --> 00:19:59,800 Speaker 2: into silence, he went into stillness, He developed his relationship 354 00:20:00,560 --> 00:20:03,800 Speaker 2: with the God within. It's not me, it's the Father 355 00:20:03,920 --> 00:20:08,239 Speaker 2: within me. That doesn't work. He said it. Yes, So 356 00:20:08,400 --> 00:20:12,840 Speaker 2: God is not external, whether it's God, divine Mind, divine Mother, 357 00:20:12,960 --> 00:20:16,439 Speaker 2: whatever it is, that is of your understanding, because the 358 00:20:16,520 --> 00:20:19,840 Speaker 2: creator wants you to understand what it is and where 359 00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:22,800 Speaker 2: it is, who it is, how it is. But Grandma, 360 00:20:22,960 --> 00:20:26,000 Speaker 2: like my grandma, you know, they've been indoctrinated in the 361 00:20:26,040 --> 00:20:30,600 Speaker 2: matrix of Churchianity and religiosity, and they don't have to 362 00:20:30,640 --> 00:20:35,560 Speaker 2: take responsibility for their salvation. It's on Jesus. If I 363 00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:38,120 Speaker 2: do what Jesus says, if I do it, what Jesus 364 00:20:38,200 --> 00:20:42,440 Speaker 2: wants then. But now in this new age, this new millennium, 365 00:20:42,520 --> 00:20:46,680 Speaker 2: the Aquarian age, we take in responsibility for ourselves. I 366 00:20:46,800 --> 00:20:50,720 Speaker 2: am nest our souls, and we don't want to pray 367 00:20:50,800 --> 00:20:55,200 Speaker 2: to an outside God. That's not satisfying us anymore because 368 00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:59,720 Speaker 2: we're a different breed in this era. So yes, this 369 00:21:00,040 --> 00:21:04,080 Speaker 2: spirit of God is within me. And those who worship 370 00:21:04,119 --> 00:21:09,720 Speaker 2: God must worship God in spirit and in truth. In spirit, 371 00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:13,240 Speaker 2: so we have to understand what spirit is. There's only 372 00:21:13,280 --> 00:21:17,920 Speaker 2: one spirit. God is spirit Spirit, not a man out 373 00:21:17,920 --> 00:21:20,160 Speaker 2: there or you know. And it's so funny that all 374 00:21:20,160 --> 00:21:22,320 Speaker 2: of us walking around with breast and vaginas, and we 375 00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:24,320 Speaker 2: looking at a man and say, I made in the 376 00:21:24,400 --> 00:21:27,600 Speaker 2: image and the likeness of Gay, Well is he trans What? 377 00:21:27,760 --> 00:21:33,400 Speaker 2: How did I get this? Because the domma doesn't tell 378 00:21:33,480 --> 00:21:36,879 Speaker 2: us about the feminine energy and expression of the Creator. 379 00:21:37,200 --> 00:21:40,120 Speaker 2: So if I had to explain it to somebody, this 380 00:21:40,160 --> 00:21:45,720 Speaker 2: is what I would say. Take a breath, focus within, 381 00:21:46,760 --> 00:21:50,560 Speaker 2: and ask God to reveal itself to you. I'm not 382 00:21:50,600 --> 00:21:54,160 Speaker 2: going to try to explain the unexplainable. Mm hmm. 383 00:22:07,080 --> 00:22:10,080 Speaker 1: What's the secret or is there a secret in your 384 00:22:10,080 --> 00:22:14,640 Speaker 1: opinion to overcoming hardships and coming out on the other side. 385 00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:18,960 Speaker 2: Well, the first secret is don't call them hardships. Go 386 00:22:19,080 --> 00:22:22,439 Speaker 2: back to what we were saying earlier, which is, Okay, 387 00:22:22,480 --> 00:22:27,199 Speaker 2: what am I learning here? You know? Recently, I have 388 00:22:27,400 --> 00:22:30,480 Speaker 2: you know, all these modern fen dangled dooleies. So I 389 00:22:30,520 --> 00:22:33,399 Speaker 2: have a geothermal heating system so that my house is 390 00:22:33,440 --> 00:22:36,879 Speaker 2: heated from the warmth of the earth, not from oil 391 00:22:37,080 --> 00:22:41,880 Speaker 2: or electricity or whatever. And my geothermal heating system went out, 392 00:22:42,160 --> 00:22:44,480 Speaker 2: the coils went out and whatever. So we're talking about 393 00:22:44,520 --> 00:22:48,160 Speaker 2: digging down twenty feet in the earth and that's quite expensive. Well, 394 00:22:48,160 --> 00:22:51,360 Speaker 2: the day after the geothermal system went out, my stovetop 395 00:22:51,560 --> 00:22:55,320 Speaker 2: cook thing went out. My stove just wouldn't cook. It 396 00:22:55,440 --> 00:22:58,600 Speaker 2: just it wouldn't. It wouldn't do nothing. So it's one 397 00:22:58,720 --> 00:23:01,600 Speaker 2: thing right after the one thing right after the other. 398 00:23:02,040 --> 00:23:04,840 Speaker 2: And the good news is I can buy a stovetop, 399 00:23:04,920 --> 00:23:08,720 Speaker 2: and I can put the geothermal system on a payment plan, 400 00:23:08,920 --> 00:23:12,680 Speaker 2: you know, and pay it off, you know, and whatever. 401 00:23:13,000 --> 00:23:15,760 Speaker 2: But not to look at that as trials and difficulties 402 00:23:16,800 --> 00:23:18,240 Speaker 2: and to say, okay, God, how are we going to 403 00:23:18,280 --> 00:23:21,000 Speaker 2: get this done? This is quite interesting. So what am 404 00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:23,720 Speaker 2: I learning? I'm learning trust, I'm learning patience because at 405 00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:26,919 Speaker 2: the same time, I went to Chipotle to get my 406 00:23:27,080 --> 00:23:31,520 Speaker 2: grandson some tacos, and I'm standing in the line and 407 00:23:31,560 --> 00:23:33,760 Speaker 2: I get to the cash register and the lady says, 408 00:23:33,800 --> 00:23:37,160 Speaker 2: he paid for your food. I go to the supermarket, 409 00:23:37,280 --> 00:23:39,960 Speaker 2: I mean, and to the Starbucks, and I'm standing in line. 410 00:23:40,000 --> 00:23:42,359 Speaker 2: I get to the register and she says, you're good. 411 00:23:42,400 --> 00:23:44,280 Speaker 2: I said, what do you mean you're good? She said, 412 00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:48,480 Speaker 2: the lady back there paid for your drink. I went 413 00:23:48,520 --> 00:23:51,879 Speaker 2: to the market yesterday and I'm standing in line and 414 00:23:51,880 --> 00:23:53,800 Speaker 2: a gentleman in front of me, he says, can I 415 00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:56,840 Speaker 2: pay for what you're getting? I was buying a pretzel 416 00:23:56,880 --> 00:23:59,320 Speaker 2: from the Amish market and I said, but I don't 417 00:23:59,359 --> 00:24:01,320 Speaker 2: even know what I'm going, And yet he said that's okay. 418 00:24:01,760 --> 00:24:04,080 Speaker 2: He said, I'm gonna give her twenty dollars. Get what 419 00:24:04,119 --> 00:24:06,440 Speaker 2: you want, and he says to the woman, you keep 420 00:24:06,680 --> 00:24:10,159 Speaker 2: whatever's left. I was getting a three dollar pretzel, and 421 00:24:10,280 --> 00:24:13,760 Speaker 2: so she got a seventeen dollar tip from him buying 422 00:24:13,760 --> 00:24:17,320 Speaker 2: me a pretzel. You know. So, yeah, the seeding systems 423 00:24:17,359 --> 00:24:20,480 Speaker 2: broke and the I don't have a stove, and you know, 424 00:24:20,560 --> 00:24:23,480 Speaker 2: it's very annoying and blah blah, blah. But somebody I 425 00:24:23,520 --> 00:24:28,879 Speaker 2: don't know bought me a pretzel a Starbucks and paid 426 00:24:28,880 --> 00:24:37,000 Speaker 2: for my tacos into Potlee. You know, look, okay, okay, 427 00:24:37,119 --> 00:24:38,000 Speaker 2: I got your back. 428 00:24:38,640 --> 00:24:41,919 Speaker 1: I got your back, bull I got your back, we 429 00:24:42,320 --> 00:24:42,720 Speaker 1: got your. 430 00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:46,040 Speaker 2: Right, we got this. Let me handle this. But if 431 00:24:46,040 --> 00:24:50,560 Speaker 2: we go into breakdown in hysteria and whining and complaining, 432 00:24:50,960 --> 00:24:55,080 Speaker 2: that energy in and of itself creates more problems than 433 00:24:55,119 --> 00:24:58,239 Speaker 2: the original problem. Here's what they taught me. When I 434 00:24:58,240 --> 00:25:01,720 Speaker 2: say they, I did my master's degree in spiritual psychology 435 00:25:01,760 --> 00:25:05,080 Speaker 2: at the University of Santa Monica and I was taught this. 436 00:25:05,960 --> 00:25:11,480 Speaker 2: How you handle the issue is the issue. But here's 437 00:25:11,520 --> 00:25:17,600 Speaker 2: the real thing. How you handle yourself as you handle 438 00:25:18,040 --> 00:25:24,880 Speaker 2: the issue is the real issue. How you sell how 439 00:25:24,920 --> 00:25:28,200 Speaker 2: am I being with myself? How am I speaking to myself? 440 00:25:28,359 --> 00:25:30,719 Speaker 2: How am I talking to myself? What am I thinking 441 00:25:30,760 --> 00:25:34,160 Speaker 2: about myself? What am I telling myself? How I handle 442 00:25:34,320 --> 00:25:38,959 Speaker 2: myself as I handle the issue is the real issue. 443 00:25:39,760 --> 00:25:42,160 Speaker 2: So yeah, it's important. 444 00:25:44,080 --> 00:25:46,320 Speaker 1: Well, I feel like I've learned so much. I'm assuming 445 00:25:47,000 --> 00:25:48,960 Speaker 1: the listeners as well. But is there any are there 446 00:25:48,960 --> 00:25:51,719 Speaker 1: any tips that you have that can I don't know. 447 00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:54,480 Speaker 1: I mean, you've given us so many, but something, something 448 00:25:54,520 --> 00:25:56,280 Speaker 1: that you feel in your heart right now to tell 449 00:25:56,320 --> 00:25:58,919 Speaker 1: the listeners, something that I mean, I'm sure is going 450 00:25:58,960 --> 00:25:59,639 Speaker 1: to help them. 451 00:26:00,080 --> 00:26:03,600 Speaker 2: Well, I think that the universe is saying it to us. 452 00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:06,360 Speaker 2: It said it to us in twenty twenty, twenty twenty one. 453 00:26:06,520 --> 00:26:12,320 Speaker 2: Go home, Go home, Be still. We are so busy, 454 00:26:13,440 --> 00:26:16,040 Speaker 2: so busy between the technology and running up and down 455 00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:19,520 Speaker 2: the roads, running out, and be still, go home when 456 00:26:19,520 --> 00:26:22,160 Speaker 2: home is where the heart is. And for me, that 457 00:26:22,240 --> 00:26:26,040 Speaker 2: says what brings you joy. One of my coaches said 458 00:26:26,080 --> 00:26:28,720 Speaker 2: something to me about two weeks ago that I'm still 459 00:26:29,119 --> 00:26:31,280 Speaker 2: working on. I had to clutch my pearls. I clutched 460 00:26:31,280 --> 00:26:37,720 Speaker 2: my pro so I almost choked myself to death. He said. 461 00:26:37,880 --> 00:26:41,720 Speaker 2: He said, Okay, so you're doing all of that for 462 00:26:42,119 --> 00:26:44,520 Speaker 2: my ministry. You're teaching this, and you're doing this, and 463 00:26:44,760 --> 00:26:51,960 Speaker 2: what is the ministry doing for you? What? So I 464 00:26:52,000 --> 00:26:55,679 Speaker 2: would say to people to be real clear about what 465 00:26:56,200 --> 00:27:01,440 Speaker 2: you're giving out and what you're getting back. My God, yeah, 466 00:27:01,480 --> 00:27:05,320 Speaker 2: because we'll spend so much time preoccupying ourselves with what 467 00:27:05,400 --> 00:27:07,480 Speaker 2: we have to do for the job and the this 468 00:27:07,760 --> 00:27:10,320 Speaker 2: and the that, But what is that thing bringing back 469 00:27:10,320 --> 00:27:15,840 Speaker 2: to you? Is it bringing anything? Home to you, because 470 00:27:15,920 --> 00:27:18,320 Speaker 2: home is where the heart is. Corona said, go home, 471 00:27:18,480 --> 00:27:20,639 Speaker 2: go home and get still. 472 00:27:21,560 --> 00:27:21,879 Speaker 1: Wow. 473 00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:23,640 Speaker 2: So if you want to, you want to know what 474 00:27:23,840 --> 00:27:26,320 Speaker 2: all of this giving out you're doing, get still and 475 00:27:26,359 --> 00:27:28,480 Speaker 2: see what you're getting back. And what I realized was 476 00:27:28,560 --> 00:27:30,840 Speaker 2: my ministry wasn't doing nothing for me but giving me 477 00:27:30,880 --> 00:27:33,280 Speaker 2: some more work to do. So I have to say, 478 00:27:33,280 --> 00:27:35,000 Speaker 2: wait a minute, hold up, let me reach. I got 479 00:27:35,040 --> 00:27:39,040 Speaker 2: to restructure this because I have to get something back 480 00:27:39,720 --> 00:27:42,280 Speaker 2: from all the giving that I'm doing. That's why those 481 00:27:42,320 --> 00:27:45,280 Speaker 2: people in the stores won't get buy in everything for 482 00:27:45,320 --> 00:27:48,800 Speaker 2: giving me back. So that's what I got back from 483 00:27:48,840 --> 00:27:52,560 Speaker 2: my ministry. I got a caramel ribbon crunch and I 484 00:27:52,600 --> 00:27:56,720 Speaker 2: got three tacos, and then I got a Bretzel from Nowageay, 485 00:27:57,280 --> 00:28:02,080 Speaker 2: can we get bigger? Can we get some more? The 486 00:28:02,160 --> 00:28:04,320 Speaker 2: other thing I think people need to know is look 487 00:28:04,359 --> 00:28:06,639 Speaker 2: around in the world right now, whether you're looking at 488 00:28:06,640 --> 00:28:10,199 Speaker 2: the political scene or you're looking at the economic scene, 489 00:28:10,880 --> 00:28:13,679 Speaker 2: whether you're looking at you know, just the level of 490 00:28:13,760 --> 00:28:18,359 Speaker 2: againstness and meanness. It's just amazing to me. But whatever 491 00:28:18,400 --> 00:28:21,400 Speaker 2: you see out there, ask yourself, how do I do this? 492 00:28:22,080 --> 00:28:25,240 Speaker 2: How do I lie? How do I bully people? How 493 00:28:25,240 --> 00:28:28,600 Speaker 2: do I shut people down? How do I take and 494 00:28:28,640 --> 00:28:31,040 Speaker 2: not give back? How do I push my way? How 495 00:28:31,040 --> 00:28:33,840 Speaker 2: do I co opt people? I mean, because this is 496 00:28:33,840 --> 00:28:36,879 Speaker 2: what we see out of there? Where's my againstness? Where 497 00:28:37,160 --> 00:28:41,280 Speaker 2: am I dug in? What's my position? Because whatever your 498 00:28:41,440 --> 00:28:44,000 Speaker 2: position is, that determines how you're going to see a 499 00:28:44,080 --> 00:28:48,640 Speaker 2: particular thing. Your position determines your perspective. So if your 500 00:28:48,680 --> 00:28:50,680 Speaker 2: position is this is wrong, you're going to see it 501 00:28:50,720 --> 00:28:53,800 Speaker 2: all is wrong. If your position is this is right, 502 00:28:53,920 --> 00:28:55,840 Speaker 2: you're not going to see what is wrong or what 503 00:28:55,920 --> 00:28:59,880 Speaker 2: could be improved. If your position is I'm right, they're wrong, 504 00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:02,280 Speaker 2: then you're not going to be even able to see 505 00:29:02,440 --> 00:29:06,840 Speaker 2: their perspective. So what is your position on anything? Get 506 00:29:06,960 --> 00:29:10,400 Speaker 2: still and get clear about that. The other thing I 507 00:29:10,440 --> 00:29:14,160 Speaker 2: would say is anything that you're against, anything you don't like, 508 00:29:14,240 --> 00:29:17,720 Speaker 2: anything you don't want, anything you complain about, whine about 509 00:29:18,640 --> 00:29:21,160 Speaker 2: and write that thing to tea and let it talk 510 00:29:21,240 --> 00:29:24,640 Speaker 2: to you and find out what's really really going on. 511 00:29:25,160 --> 00:29:28,600 Speaker 2: Just let me let me sit down with my pro 512 00:29:28,680 --> 00:29:34,280 Speaker 2: life philosophy, my uh, you know, anti abortion philosophy. Let 513 00:29:34,320 --> 00:29:38,080 Speaker 2: me sit down with my democratic philosophy and let me 514 00:29:38,160 --> 00:29:39,960 Speaker 2: have some tea with it, and let me see what 515 00:29:40,160 --> 00:29:43,680 Speaker 2: is really giving to me. It's a giving to me, 516 00:29:44,600 --> 00:29:48,560 Speaker 2: and what is my position on it? It's exciting to me. 517 00:29:49,000 --> 00:29:51,560 Speaker 2: It's so much work that we need to do on 518 00:29:51,600 --> 00:29:54,800 Speaker 2: ourselves as individuals to make the world a better place. 519 00:29:55,560 --> 00:29:57,680 Speaker 2: Then we don't have time for all of the wahalla 520 00:29:57,800 --> 00:30:01,480 Speaker 2: and conflomeration. If you just then sometime with you, you 521 00:30:01,520 --> 00:30:06,880 Speaker 2: don't have time to be on Facebook, canceling people, canceling 522 00:30:06,920 --> 00:30:10,760 Speaker 2: and blocking on TikTok, dancing on the poles. Sit yourself 523 00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:11,480 Speaker 2: down somewhere. 524 00:30:14,000 --> 00:30:17,400 Speaker 1: I get you, Boo, you're speaking to me. You're speaking 525 00:30:17,400 --> 00:30:20,920 Speaker 1: to me because I feel like my soul has been 526 00:30:20,960 --> 00:30:23,280 Speaker 1: telling me to just sit down and be still. And 527 00:30:23,280 --> 00:30:26,360 Speaker 1: I'm going to take a few weeks off because I've 528 00:30:26,400 --> 00:30:30,040 Speaker 1: been feeling a little depleted. I really have with work 529 00:30:30,080 --> 00:30:33,000 Speaker 1: and I feel like I've been giving so much it's crazy. 530 00:30:33,000 --> 00:30:35,760 Speaker 1: I'm like, you are. God is speaking to me through 531 00:30:35,800 --> 00:30:38,960 Speaker 1: you right now. Now. Oh, before I forget the R Spot, 532 00:30:39,040 --> 00:30:40,880 Speaker 1: talk to me about it. That's your podcast. 533 00:30:41,280 --> 00:30:44,280 Speaker 2: Oh yes, listen. I used to do the R Spot 534 00:30:44,400 --> 00:30:47,800 Speaker 2: every Tuesday on YouTube. Well. I would go in and 535 00:30:47,920 --> 00:30:52,440 Speaker 2: answer people's questions about relationships because the truth is, relationships 536 00:30:52,480 --> 00:30:56,160 Speaker 2: are our salvation. We're in relationship with everything. You're in 537 00:30:56,240 --> 00:30:58,880 Speaker 2: relationship with people, You're in relationship with work, You're in 538 00:30:58,960 --> 00:31:02,840 Speaker 2: relationship with the vironment, You're in relationship with money. You 539 00:31:02,880 --> 00:31:06,680 Speaker 2: are in relationship with everything. And a lot of the 540 00:31:06,800 --> 00:31:10,600 Speaker 2: challenges that I see or have encountered in my work 541 00:31:10,640 --> 00:31:13,720 Speaker 2: with people over these thirty five years is that we 542 00:31:13,800 --> 00:31:18,880 Speaker 2: have very dysfunctional relationships. We have dysfunctional relationships with people, 543 00:31:18,960 --> 00:31:22,000 Speaker 2: with our lovers, with our kids, with our money, with 544 00:31:22,120 --> 00:31:26,120 Speaker 2: the world, with God. We have dysfunctional relationships. So the 545 00:31:26,320 --> 00:31:29,640 Speaker 2: art spot is that place where we come to talk 546 00:31:29,760 --> 00:31:34,360 Speaker 2: about relationships, all kinds of relationships. I don't care what 547 00:31:34,520 --> 00:31:38,680 Speaker 2: it is so because what I learned for myself in 548 00:31:38,720 --> 00:31:42,640 Speaker 2: my own dysfunction was it I meant good, but I 549 00:31:42,680 --> 00:31:45,680 Speaker 2: simply didn't have tools and skills. I didn't. You know, 550 00:31:45,840 --> 00:31:51,040 Speaker 2: I watched a womanizing father and an emotionally unavailable father 551 00:31:51,440 --> 00:31:56,640 Speaker 2: and a broken wounded grandmother raised me. You know, with no, 552 00:31:57,800 --> 00:32:00,160 Speaker 2: I don't even know what I think. Most of the time, 553 00:32:00,200 --> 00:32:03,920 Speaker 2: I was the healthiest one in the house. And then 554 00:32:04,000 --> 00:32:09,320 Speaker 2: I went into a family environment with a domestic violence 555 00:32:09,440 --> 00:32:13,000 Speaker 2: and an alcoholic uncle that's the one who raped me, 556 00:32:13,200 --> 00:32:18,240 Speaker 2: and silent dysfunctional. Onto it was. You know, I could 557 00:32:18,240 --> 00:32:20,880 Speaker 2: go on and on, but I didn't know anything about 558 00:32:20,920 --> 00:32:23,640 Speaker 2: relationships other than they were supposed to make me feel good. 559 00:32:23,720 --> 00:32:25,719 Speaker 2: I like you, you like me. We do the wild thing. 560 00:32:25,760 --> 00:32:27,800 Speaker 2: We spoke a lot appy flowers, and then we pay 561 00:32:27,840 --> 00:32:35,480 Speaker 2: the rent. Okay, you're gonna pay the light billow know, 562 00:32:35,640 --> 00:32:38,080 Speaker 2: we just talked about happy flowers and wrint. We didn't 563 00:32:38,080 --> 00:32:41,600 Speaker 2: talk about raising kids and light buil and spiritually all 564 00:32:41,640 --> 00:32:46,640 Speaker 2: of them. It's just crazy. So my intention, because I 565 00:32:46,680 --> 00:32:50,440 Speaker 2: think intention is the greatest tool we can have, is 566 00:32:50,480 --> 00:32:54,760 Speaker 2: to support people in developing the skills and the tools 567 00:32:54,800 --> 00:33:00,680 Speaker 2: required to build healthy, fulfilling, lasting, loving relationships in every 568 00:33:00,760 --> 00:33:03,480 Speaker 2: area of their life. Somebody accused me of something the 569 00:33:03,480 --> 00:33:05,200 Speaker 2: other day. They said, well, you call so and so 570 00:33:05,280 --> 00:33:08,360 Speaker 2: a bee. I said, no, no, not me. You will 571 00:33:08,440 --> 00:33:11,360 Speaker 2: never hear out of these mouths, this mouth right here. 572 00:33:11,560 --> 00:33:13,840 Speaker 2: I don't know what you think you heard, but I 573 00:33:13,840 --> 00:33:17,920 Speaker 2: would never call another sister a bee. Never. I would 574 00:33:17,920 --> 00:33:20,960 Speaker 2: never do that unless we're using it in a context 575 00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:23,880 Speaker 2: of healing and growing, because that word has a different 576 00:33:23,880 --> 00:33:27,280 Speaker 2: context for me. But in anger to say that to her, said, 577 00:33:27,280 --> 00:33:29,640 Speaker 2: I would never say that. I want women to have 578 00:33:29,640 --> 00:33:33,080 Speaker 2: a better relationship with each other. I want women to 579 00:33:33,120 --> 00:33:37,240 Speaker 2: have a better relationship with men. I want men brothers, brothers. 580 00:33:37,320 --> 00:33:41,200 Speaker 2: You are my sister. You are my sister. So come 581 00:33:41,240 --> 00:33:43,880 Speaker 2: to the R spot. Let's talk about your relationship with 582 00:33:44,160 --> 00:33:46,960 Speaker 2: each other, with people with money, with your pets. Now, 583 00:33:47,040 --> 00:33:49,320 Speaker 2: how come people treat their pets better than they treat 584 00:33:49,360 --> 00:33:49,959 Speaker 2: other people? 585 00:33:50,280 --> 00:33:52,520 Speaker 1: Mm hm, it's that's so true. 586 00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:55,280 Speaker 2: We got I don't know how many children hungry in 587 00:33:55,320 --> 00:33:58,600 Speaker 2: the world, and people are walking around pushing their dogs 588 00:33:58,680 --> 00:34:01,920 Speaker 2: in a stroller. You could have take that stroll of 589 00:34:01,960 --> 00:34:04,560 Speaker 2: money and fed some hungry children somewhere with all of 590 00:34:04,600 --> 00:34:07,840 Speaker 2: the level of food insecurity that we have here. That's 591 00:34:07,920 --> 00:34:10,720 Speaker 2: just my perspective. I'm ready to shift my position. 592 00:34:12,560 --> 00:34:14,759 Speaker 1: So you guys heard it here. You guys have to 593 00:34:14,800 --> 00:34:17,280 Speaker 1: listen to the ours. So I definitely am It sounds 594 00:34:17,920 --> 00:34:20,239 Speaker 1: right like exactly what I need in my life. Where 595 00:34:20,239 --> 00:34:23,560 Speaker 1: can they find you? Share your social media, your website please. 596 00:34:24,360 --> 00:34:27,319 Speaker 2: Yamla dot com. Particularly if you want to do how 597 00:34:27,360 --> 00:34:30,880 Speaker 2: to love the Bible of Metaphysical Interpretation, I'd love to 598 00:34:30,920 --> 00:34:33,520 Speaker 2: have you Yamla dot com. You can find out about 599 00:34:33,520 --> 00:34:36,719 Speaker 2: all my classes and everything. Then I have masterpiece of 600 00:34:36,760 --> 00:34:39,880 Speaker 2: body Therapy, which is a line of natural body products 601 00:34:40,320 --> 00:34:44,080 Speaker 2: made with herbs, oils and African black soap so that 602 00:34:44,200 --> 00:34:48,000 Speaker 2: as you clean your body, you clear your energy because 603 00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:52,239 Speaker 2: everything is energy right And you can hear the art 604 00:34:52,239 --> 00:34:57,920 Speaker 2: spot on iHeartRadio, shondaland Media Spotify. Wherever you get your podcast, 605 00:34:58,040 --> 00:35:00,440 Speaker 2: just put my name in spell it right, I Y 606 00:35:00,680 --> 00:35:03,320 Speaker 2: A N l A. Because if not, you're gonna get Isaac. 607 00:35:05,600 --> 00:35:10,839 Speaker 2: When people spell my neighbor, what comes up is Isaac. Yes. 608 00:35:12,360 --> 00:35:12,720 Speaker 1: Yeah. 609 00:35:12,719 --> 00:35:15,120 Speaker 2: But any place you listen to podcasts you can get 610 00:35:15,120 --> 00:35:15,760 Speaker 2: the R spot. 611 00:35:16,280 --> 00:35:20,319 Speaker 1: Okay, well I'm excited, I really am. Thanks again, and 612 00:35:20,400 --> 00:35:22,720 Speaker 1: you guys know we always finished the episode of Cheeky's 613 00:35:22,719 --> 00:35:31,560 Speaker 1: and Chill with the motivational quote. Today's quote is you 614 00:35:31,600 --> 00:35:33,920 Speaker 1: can't go back and change the beginning, but you can 615 00:35:33,960 --> 00:35:37,279 Speaker 1: start where you are and change the ending. That is 616 00:35:37,320 --> 00:35:40,000 Speaker 1: my quote for you. Thank you so much for staying 617 00:35:40,000 --> 00:35:50,040 Speaker 1: for listening Los Quiromco and Cheeky's and Chill. Do you 618 00:35:50,080 --> 00:35:54,920 Speaker 1: need advice on love, relationships, health emails? I'm so excited 619 00:35:54,920 --> 00:35:57,320 Speaker 1: to share with you that my Cheekies and Chill podcast 620 00:35:57,400 --> 00:36:00,440 Speaker 1: will have an extra episode drop each week. I'll be 621 00:36:00,520 --> 00:36:05,920 Speaker 1: answering all your questions. Just leave me a voice message 622 00:36:06,480 --> 00:36:08,640 Speaker 1: person a Monday. All you have to do is go 623 00:36:08,680 --> 00:36:11,960 Speaker 1: to speak pipe dot com, slash Cheeky's and Chill Podcasts 624 00:36:12,000 --> 00:36:18,160 Speaker 1: and record your questions. I can't wait to hear from you. 625 00:36:18,600 --> 00:36:22,720 Speaker 1: This is a production of iHeartRadio and the Miculdura podcast Network. 626 00:36:23,000 --> 00:36:25,920 Speaker 1: Follow us on Instagram at Michael Dura Podcasts and follow 627 00:36:25,960 --> 00:36:28,680 Speaker 1: me Cheeky's That's c h i q u i s. 628 00:36:28,960 --> 00:36:33,520 Speaker 1: For more podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, 629 00:36:33,680 --> 00:36:36,280 Speaker 1: or wherever you listen to your favorite podcasts.