Speaker 1: Hi, Hi, Hi Hi. I'm just going through my makeup.
Speaker 1: I gotta put my makeup on for my podcast because
Speaker 1: it's not recorded on.
Speaker 2: Vide everyone knows it's a visual medium.
Speaker 3: No.
Speaker 2: It is funny too because we have guests all the
Speaker 2: time who are like, this is not going to be
Speaker 2: on video, right, And then I'm like, except for Socials,
Speaker 2: We're gonna put a clip on Socials, so then everybody
Speaker 2: has to get looking good.
Speaker 4: Okay, guys.
Speaker 1: We have added more shows to my Little Big Bitch
Speaker 1: tour because I'm coming all over. We added a second
Speaker 1: show at the Pantagius in Los Angeles, so that's October
Speaker 1: twelfth and Friday the thirteenth, which is my favorite day
Speaker 1: of the year. We added a second show in Boston
Speaker 1: at the Wiging Center September twenty ninth and thirtieth is
Speaker 1: two shows in New York. I also have a show
Speaker 1: in East Hampton, New York August twenty six.
Speaker 4: We added a.
Speaker 1: Second show in Portland, so Thursday, November tewod Friday November third,
Speaker 1: and Portland November fourth and fifth in San Francisco, two
Speaker 1: shows there. We added a second show in Seattle November
Speaker 1: tenth and eleventh, two shows Boston are November sixteenth and
Speaker 1: seventeenth at the Bach Center at Wang Theater. And I'm
Speaker 1: also coming to Toronto and Montreal and Ottawa and so
Speaker 1: many other cities Columbus, Cincinnati, Detroit, Louisville.
Speaker 4: So I will see everybody at all of these shows.
Speaker 4: Thank you. Get your tickets at Chelseahandler dot com.
Speaker 2: So, Chelsea, we have a great guest today and she's
Speaker 2: somebody who talks a lot about her mental health.
Speaker 5: And I got me wondering.
Speaker 2: You are somebody who's always talked a lot about your life,
Speaker 2: but a few years ago you obviously made a very
Speaker 2: conscious decision to start talking really candidly about your mental health.
Speaker 2: And I wonder was making that decision scary?
Speaker 6: No?
Speaker 4: I mean it was so natural.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm always sharing what I'm going through, and
Speaker 1: it was so natural, and I was learning so much,
Speaker 1: and it was such a shift in my life. It
Speaker 1: was a noticeable by everyone that matters to me, and
Speaker 1: some friends, you know, in ways didn't like that which
Speaker 1: I had heard could happen.
Speaker 4: And I was it was shocking interesting.
Speaker 1: I remember once I decided I didn't want that. I
Speaker 1: don't want to spend my time talking shit, I don't.
Speaker 1: I mean, you know, listen, we all talk shit. There's
Speaker 1: a time and a place for that, and then there's
Speaker 1: a way to do it that's not nasty, and there's
Speaker 1: a way to do it that is, you know, that
Speaker 1: is nasty. And so I changed a lot of those
Speaker 1: habits that were giving me, like you know, that were
Speaker 1: bringing me lower than I want to be. I want
Speaker 1: to be high and I want to be upbeat. And
Speaker 1: it wasn't hard to share because I always know that
Speaker 1: when anybody shares anything, you're helping so many people. And
Speaker 1: I know that how many people I'm helping because of
Speaker 1: my honesty, because of my books and my stand up
Speaker 1: and this podcast, because they reach out and they tell me,
Speaker 1: and you know, some of the notes I get are
Speaker 1: so profound and meaningful to me that anytime I feel
Speaker 1: low or I'm feeling like insecure, I always just go
Speaker 1: and look through my dms and to be reminded. And
Speaker 1: usually whenever you're feeling like that, something happens to remind
Speaker 1: you all so you know, you don't even have to
Speaker 1: go look that far because somebody will reach out to
Speaker 1: you and go I just want you to know, like yesterday,
Speaker 1: I came home. There's all this fan mail on this thing,
Speaker 1: and I rarely have time to go through that, sure,
Speaker 1: but I remember walking by it yesterday and I was like, hey,
Speaker 1: these people are taking their time to write you go
Speaker 1: read some of them.
Speaker 4: And I did, and it was just so moving, just.
Speaker 1: People taking the time to write something that the impact
Speaker 1: that you had on a certain event in their life.
Speaker 1: And you know that your honesty helped me go to
Speaker 1: therapy and all.
Speaker 4: I mean, you just never.
Speaker 1: Have any idea, even if you're someone like me with
Speaker 1: a big platform, how many people you're affecting and impacting
Speaker 1: with that domino effect, So you know, for people who
Speaker 1: aren't famous, you're affecting people too.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you know the same way.
Speaker 1: It's like it's not just one person's responsibility, Like you
Speaker 1: have to remember when you're a good person and you're
Speaker 1: there for your friends and you're and you show up
Speaker 1: for them and you're honest, or you're sharing your story,
Speaker 1: you are helping therapies others.
Speaker 5: Yeah, I love that you say, like, whether you have
Speaker 5: a platform or not.
Speaker 2: I got a text recently from a friend of mine
Speaker 2: on Mother's Day.
Speaker 5: She's a mom, and she texted me she's someone who.
Speaker 2: She doesn't live in LA anymore, so we don't talk
Speaker 2: as much, but we were really close for a long time.
Speaker 2: And she's on me this gorgeous I'm like going to
Speaker 2: cry thinking about it, this gorgeous text message saying like
Speaker 2: no one in my life has ever mothered me the
Speaker 2: way that you did.
Speaker 5: I just like lost it. And you know, you just
Speaker 5: never know what like little things.
Speaker 2: You do on a day to day basis like really
Speaker 2: get through to people or are moving and impactful for people.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And another thing that because I have experienced in death,
Speaker 1: when someone in my life loses someone, I'm always there.
Speaker 1: If someone's in crisis, I'm there, I check in, I'm
Speaker 1: always on it. Because there's a period of grieving where
Speaker 1: everyone shows up, and then there's a period where people disappear.
Speaker 1: So that's the most difficult time for people because I
Speaker 1: lived that and I know it that people feel, you know,
Speaker 1: they want to reach out to you, and then everyone
Speaker 1: kind of moves on with their lives, right, So the
Speaker 1: people that do remember and are like consist and show
Speaker 1: up beyond the point.
Speaker 5: The week, the month, after year, and even you know, a.
Speaker 1: Very common thing for people to say is like I
Speaker 1: didn't want to bother. I don't want to burden her
Speaker 1: she's going through so much. Or it's not my place.
Speaker 1: It's like it's it's anyone's place. You can to reach out,
Speaker 1: you don't have to. If they don't care or want
Speaker 1: you to reach out, then fine, But it's everyone's place
Speaker 1: to extend a branch and say hey, or not a branch,
Speaker 1: extend love and say hey, hey, I'm here. If you
Speaker 1: need me, call me any time. Consistently check in. I
Speaker 1: think that makes a big difference in other people's lives.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: For example, I had a friend who lost someone a
Speaker 2: couple of years ago, and it was a really sudden
Speaker 2: and really traumatic death, and I knew she was just
Speaker 2: like beside herself, not even able to like talk to people,
Speaker 2: and I just I texted her just every day for
Speaker 2: the longest time, or every few days for the longest time,
Speaker 2: just being like I'm here, And I said, like, you
Speaker 2: don't have to text me back, you don't need to
Speaker 2: do anything, but I just want you to know I'm here,
Speaker 2: I love you, and just like consistently did that. Do
Speaker 2: you have a how do you get a sense of
Speaker 2: like when someone's ready to talk versus like they just
Speaker 2: need to know you're there.
Speaker 1: I think you reach out, you know, with texts and
Speaker 1: like you can call whatever your dynamic is. If it's
Speaker 1: not a close friend, then you know, I think you
Speaker 1: you know, if someone dies, you.
Speaker 4: Call, Yeah, you call them immediately.
Speaker 1: And if it's somebody that's far away that you can text,
Speaker 1: send a text, or you can wait until it dies
Speaker 1: down and then really go in and say, hey, I've
Speaker 1: been thinking about you this whole time. I just want
Speaker 1: to let you know I'm here.
Speaker 4: I don't think there are any rules for that.
Speaker 1: You know, you don't want to harass somebody, but you
Speaker 1: just want to make sure that they know that you're
Speaker 1: thinking of them, and that you're in their thoughts and
Speaker 1: you know, and that you're.
Speaker 4: Just thinking about them. I think that's a comfort.
Speaker 2: Yeah, It's like I think some people they want to
Speaker 2: have someone show up at their door, and other people don't,
Speaker 2: ye know, Like I.
Speaker 4: Don't want that. I'm not.
Speaker 1: I like to be alone when I'm dealing with something,
Speaker 1: to occults mostly and get through it because it's just
Speaker 1: such a mouthstrom of emotion, you know, it's up and
Speaker 1: down and up and down and and and breaking up
Speaker 1: is easier to be show up for someone because that's
Speaker 1: not death, right, death is like people are like scared
Speaker 1: to have to talk about that.
Speaker 5: Yeah you can with a breakup.
Speaker 2: You can show up with like a bottle of wine
Speaker 2: and a bar of chocolate and like, you know, sit
Speaker 2: on the couch and like be together.
Speaker 4: Yeah. Okay, So our guest today is a hot mess.
Speaker 4: I love her.
Speaker 1: She made last year's Forbes thirty Under thirty list and
Speaker 1: was named TikToker of the Year by Paper Magazine, and
Speaker 1: of course is also known as Kombucha Girl. So she's
Speaker 1: the host of the new podcast The Broski Report. Please
Speaker 1: welcome Britney Broski.
Speaker 7: Is that a beer? Would you imagine if I just
Speaker 7: walk in with like a Corse light? What is that?
Speaker 7: Eleven am? So that's going to be a water good death.
Speaker 7: That's the ship that Travis Burker uses for enemas.
Speaker 4: Britney Brosky just showed up with a beer.
Speaker 7: It's what time is it? It's al.
Speaker 4: That's how some people have to do podcasts. Brittany Broski
Speaker 4: is here, everybody.
Speaker 1: Okay, And I hope you're familiar with her because she
Speaker 1: is a real hot mess and I like her style
Speaker 1: and she's got a lot of stuff going on.
Speaker 4: She has a new podcast.
Speaker 7: Actually, do have a new podcast about that.
Speaker 3: It's called The Broski Report with Brennany Broski in case
Speaker 3: you couldn't, like, you know, put it together. And it's
Speaker 3: very much stream of consciousness, just whatever comes out of
Speaker 3: your mouth, my crazy.
Speaker 7: Beautiful mouth, uh huh.
Speaker 3: It's kind of what makes it onto air. So it's fun,
Speaker 3: it's it's a lot of fun. We designed the set
Speaker 3: kind of like if Walter Cronkite was a gay man, which.
Speaker 1: He may have been, which probably, I mean, it seems
Speaker 1: like almost all men are gay, is what we're figuring out,
Speaker 1: and that's why they're so pissed.
Speaker 3: Off exactly, And I think that's a beautiful thing. They
Speaker 3: could just work through it. But it's very nineteen fifty
Speaker 3: steemed for the set. But the whole idea was, my
Speaker 3: fans are called Brosky Nation, and I am a tyrannical dictator,
Speaker 3: like just for prostcadation, Like there are no laws last
Speaker 3: change daily.
Speaker 7: So I was like, what's a fun way.
Speaker 3: To kind of deliver news to these people of like,
Speaker 3: all right, guys, we're no longer listening to this we're
Speaker 3: listening to death tones. Okay, let's let's get with it.
Speaker 3: And so I was like, we need a news set,
Speaker 3: and uh, it really came together really beautifully, and it's
Speaker 3: in my spare bedroom at my house.
Speaker 1: So congratulations, I'm building my podcast you do at my
Speaker 1: new house and may never be ready. I'm gonna be
Speaker 1: using your podcast room actually from here on it it
Speaker 1: is there a medieval times theme for this?
Speaker 7: No, that's just gonna be in my bedroom.
Speaker 4: Okay.
Speaker 7: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Brittany has gained a lot of notoriety on TikTok because
Speaker 1: you have a over ten. Did you just throw coffee
Speaker 1: in your face?
Speaker 7: Vomit?
Speaker 1: Oh guys, I wish this was on video, and it
Speaker 1: actually happens to be. So maybe this is the clipble
Speaker 1: use she ejaculated coffee into her face when she went
Speaker 1: to take a sip the other day.
Speaker 4: I was on a plane and I don't know.
Speaker 1: I guess it must have been high because I went
Speaker 1: to go take a sip and assumed there was like
Speaker 1: a sippy the top a lid. Oh no, yeah, And
Speaker 1: I just poured the entire drink down on my shirt
Speaker 1: and I was like, wait, what just happened?
Speaker 4: I had like a synapse loss and I just poured
Speaker 4: it on me and I'm like, wait, what are you doing?
Speaker 1: No, I must have been on an edible that's edible behavior,
Speaker 1: you know. But because of your popularity on TikTok, your
Speaker 1: podcast now and all of social media, you have a
Speaker 1: huge following. And because of that, you've gotten to meet
Speaker 1: a lot of your heroes, which I loved when you
Speaker 1: met Harry Styles that you are set.
Speaker 4: She's a huge Harry Styles fan.
Speaker 7: Like ridiculous, it's like really actually stupid.
Speaker 4: I mean I think a lot of people probably feel
Speaker 4: that way.
Speaker 7: Absolutely.
Speaker 3: That's why when that happened, it was so like, because
Speaker 3: I don't know about it.
Speaker 7: You're probably not terrified of the internet, but I am.
Speaker 4: And so terrified in which way just of.
Speaker 3: Like people's response to anything, how they can twist it
Speaker 3: and all that.
Speaker 7: So that happened, and I was terrified at first.
Speaker 4: Let's tell us what happened. Break it down.
Speaker 3: Well, so they surprised me. So I HSHQ, which is
Speaker 3: Harry's like headquarters. Oh my God, reached out to me
Speaker 3: and they were like, hey, Brittany, what are you doing
Speaker 3: on these days?
Speaker 7: And I was like, well, I'm actually kind of busy,
Speaker 7: but what's up.
Speaker 3: And they were like, he's doing a one night only
Speaker 3: in New York for you know, Harry's House coming out,
Speaker 3: and we wanted to know if you would take over
Speaker 3: the social media for it. And I was like, what
Speaker 3: the fuck.
Speaker 7: Yeah, I'm free. I just cleared my schedule. I'm free.
Speaker 3: And so I didn't go into it with this expectation
Speaker 3: I was going to meet him because I was like,
Speaker 3: he's so busy. This is the first time he's ever
Speaker 3: performing this new album. Like, I'm sure he's nervous. He
Speaker 3: doesn't want to do like a fucking meet and greet,
Speaker 3: and I don't want to meet him either, like he
Speaker 3: scares me, Like I love him so much, he's so scary.
Speaker 3: And so I went into it, like we interviewed fans,
Speaker 3: we were giving out free tickets, we were giving out pizza.
Speaker 7: It was pouring rain, like it.
Speaker 4: Was just so fun, and you were taking over their
Speaker 4: social media.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I took over the HSHQ like account and just
Speaker 3: taking him around the stadium and interviewing fans and stuff. Well,
Speaker 3: at the end of the night, it's like an hour
Speaker 3: till showtime. We wrap giving people tickets and whatever, and
Speaker 3: so I go back. I think we're going back to
Speaker 3: my dressing room just to kind of like hang out.
Speaker 3: And I'm walking back in and people start put like
Speaker 3: bringing out their phones and I'm like, it's kind of weird.
Speaker 3: And so we're walking in my dressing room and I
Speaker 3: opened the door and he's right there. And they had
Speaker 3: told me before, they were like maybe maybe it'll happen
Speaker 3: another time, but like it's just there's so much going on,
Speaker 3: like it's not gonna happen. I was like kind of
Speaker 3: relieve it also like okay, okay, And so I opened.
Speaker 7: The door and they fucking surprised me with him. He's
Speaker 7: right in my dressing room like this, I run the
Speaker 7: other way.
Speaker 3: I run out of the fucking room screaming. I was
Speaker 3: like I can't. It was just like sensory overload. I
Speaker 3: like went blind for a second. So I ran back
Speaker 3: in the room. And then that's what that clip is
Speaker 3: is of me talking to him for like thirty seconds,
Speaker 3: showed him my tattoo of a Harry Styles tattoo because
Speaker 3: I'm mentally ill. So that's it was a beautiful, beautiful,
Speaker 3: scary moment.
Speaker 4: That's so cute, though, who else have you gotten to
Speaker 4: me like that.
Speaker 3: Are you like a nineteen seventy five fan, like the
Speaker 3: nineteen seventy five.
Speaker 4: That's the year I was born.
Speaker 1: So I guess yeah, yeah, kind of a little bit,
Speaker 1: oh I guess yeah.
Speaker 3: Well there's a band called nine seventy five and the
Speaker 3: lead singer is another one of my like I pissed
Speaker 3: a little.
Speaker 7: Bit in my pants. I had to go change.
Speaker 4: What's his name?
Speaker 7: His name is Maddie. I love him and.
Speaker 4: That's he only has a one day is he like share?
Speaker 7: Yeah, yeah, just Maddie.
Speaker 3: Oh no, it's Mattie Heally and he's very very British,
Speaker 3: Like think of the most British man you can that's him.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, I like Rits.
Speaker 1: I'm always attracted to British guys. It's there's something else happening.
Speaker 1: It just feels like they know geography, you know what I.
Speaker 4: Mean, And that's what that's a turn on for me.
Speaker 4: Education is a turn on for me.
Speaker 7: Yeah, they can like look at the map and kind
Speaker 7: of know what's going on.
Speaker 1: Better well rounded or more well rounded. Not better well
Speaker 1: rounded because apparently I can't speak.
Speaker 4: Eish person would never say that. As usual, I cannot
Speaker 4: speaking this.
Speaker 5: Britty I have to tell you speaking of mental illness.
Speaker 7: Oh go ahead.
Speaker 2: It was just on vacation with a couple of my girlfriends,
Speaker 2: and we very much loved your depression meal.
Speaker 5: It came up many times.
Speaker 2: Brittany did this little depression meal that was apples and
Speaker 2: chocolate chip, just dry chocolate chips on a plate and
Speaker 2: just laughing and crying at the same time.
Speaker 5: And it is truly made our ocasion much better.
Speaker 4: Good come, yeah, that sounds good.
Speaker 3: And the apples were like a little brown and old,
Speaker 3: and I like put them in the bowl and dry
Speaker 3: chocolate chips, and I in my head, I was like
Speaker 3: dinner and then I ate it and I filmed that
Speaker 3: video because I started it was so fucking ridiculous, Like
Speaker 3: that is so stupid.
Speaker 5: But it's also like the thing that happens when you're
Speaker 5: different stud I've had.
Speaker 7: Like a can of corn for dinner before. That's all
Speaker 7: I can make.
Speaker 4: That man came out really nicely.
Speaker 1: Anytime I see corn, all I think about is go
Speaker 1: into the bathroom and I keep having it. I can't
Speaker 1: eat corn anymore. I'm so over corn. And then I
Speaker 1: found out about Tito's corn Syrup. A few years ago,
Speaker 1: I was such a big fan of Titos and that
Speaker 1: they used so much corn syrup and I.
Speaker 5: Was so in their vodka.
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, because it's like a.
Speaker 1: Local Austin company, you know. So I was trying to
Speaker 1: support that, but no longer. I'm back to Belvidere and
Speaker 1: King Street for Kate Hudson.
Speaker 4: She she has good vacca with King Street.
Speaker 1: Also, I know you're very involved with the drag community,
Speaker 1: and since there's so much nonsense going on right now
Speaker 1: about the drag community, ridiculous banning drag which has turned
Speaker 1: into just a total dog whistle and basically demonizing trans
Speaker 1: children for a political point, Like the Republicans are so
Speaker 1: nasty the way that they're treating drag queens and the arguments.
Speaker 1: I mean, I posted something on my Instagram about drag
Speaker 1: queens and you should see some of the comments saying
Speaker 1: I'm all for people doing what they want, but they
Speaker 1: need to stop dragging our kids to shows.
Speaker 4: And it's like, cutface.
Speaker 8: What child do you know that's five years old that
Speaker 8: is going to drag shows without their parents. If they're
Speaker 8: at a drag show, then their parents brought them there.
Speaker 8: There are no seven year old children going to dragon shows.
Speaker 8: On their own, just like there are no transgender children
Speaker 8: getting surgery either.
Speaker 7: Right. Well, it's also like ask any fucking drag queen.
Speaker 7: They don't want children there.
Speaker 4: I don't know. I don't want children at my shows.
Speaker 3: Like I feel like it's such a non issue that
Speaker 3: they have made into this.
Speaker 7: It's so hyper politicized. It doesn't even.
Speaker 1: Exist the issue exactly, You're right, it doesn't exist. It's
Speaker 1: such bullshit. It's such a non issue that they sit
Speaker 1: there and they hammer home, and then these idiots that
Speaker 1: believe that to be the truth are like, it's wrong
Speaker 1: that these children, they haven't even thought about the actual
Speaker 1: logistics of a child going to a drag show, Like
Speaker 1: are they getting, you know, from nursery school straight to
Speaker 1: their drag show because that's the field trip.
Speaker 4: No, it isn't. Yeah, so it's all just such bullshit.
Speaker 1: But I mean, I think it's just going to make
Speaker 1: the drag community louder and prouder and all of its allies, allies.
Speaker 1: I was sorry, Vanessa Gonzalez. My opener always says you're
Speaker 1: such a good Alley as a joke because she always
Speaker 1: mispronounces things. And so now I'm picking it up, and
Speaker 1: now I'm I'm no, I.
Speaker 4: Don't know how to speak English.
Speaker 7: We'll get their eventually.
Speaker 4: What else is happening in your love life? Do you
Speaker 4: have a love life?
Speaker 3: I hang out with speaking of drag queens, so many
Speaker 3: gay people that no, if like that there are no
Speaker 3: straatmen in my life because I am unfortunately very straight
Speaker 3: and my type is just not not in or around
Speaker 3: my immediate sphere. So especially fucking Hollywood, West Hollywood, it's
Speaker 3: like not a single one to be found.
Speaker 1: Now, So what do you do? You make any effort
Speaker 1: to date? Do you go on like sites or any
Speaker 1: dating apps or anything like that?
Speaker 3: Because when I when everything kind of first happened for me,
Speaker 3: I kind of had like a really upsetting experience where
Speaker 3: like I realized my anonymity no longer existed, you know
Speaker 3: what I mean, where like I can no longer just
Speaker 3: be a woman on a dating app. It's like, oh,
Speaker 3: you're from and it's like and men aren't respectful ever
Speaker 3: in the way that they approach that you know of Like,
Speaker 3: so what's it like? You know, we're asking me questions,
Speaker 3: it's just like, oh, no fucking way, I matched with U.
Speaker 3: And it's like, so I deleted all the apps, and
Speaker 3: I kind of have resigned myself to this, like if
Speaker 3: I'm going to meet him, it's going to be in
Speaker 3: the club, or like it's going to be in a party,
Speaker 3: and then I don't go to parties, so it's like, oh, right,
Speaker 3: so maybe I won't ever meet a man.
Speaker 7: So that's fine.
Speaker 1: Well, let's hope at some point that you do. You're young,
Speaker 1: you have time to not be worried about it, exactly.
Speaker 1: I mean, you have all the time in the world
Speaker 1: to not be worried about it, exactly. I need something
Speaker 1: to spike my sex drive. I think I was saying,
Speaker 1: are you I got nothing going on?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 1: I have something going on, but not sex. It's not
Speaker 1: it's not it's a lead up. Yeah, it's a hearty outbreak.
Speaker 1: It's a lead up to possibly sex. I'm talking to
Speaker 1: some guy. I will meet him at some point and
Speaker 1: then I'll decide I don't like to talk on the
Speaker 1: phone before we meet because I don't know that I'm
Speaker 1: gonna like you.
Speaker 4: So I like texting. And it's funny.
Speaker 1: Because Tinks in her new book was talking about texting
Speaker 1: is not talking, and I'm like, no, No, texting is talking,
Speaker 1: Like that's.
Speaker 4: The only talking.
Speaker 1: I want to until I see you face to face,
Speaker 1: and then if we have great chemistry and great sex.
Speaker 4: Then we could talk on the phone.
Speaker 1: But not for that, Like, I'm not going to waste
Speaker 1: my phone time with you in advance of the penetration.
Speaker 4: I never know what's happening.
Speaker 2: And if there's chemistry, yeah, I feel like if you're
Speaker 2: on the phone with someone, you have to like be
Speaker 2: close to being in love.
Speaker 5: It has to be like serious.
Speaker 7: We got a FaceTime called oh.
Speaker 5: No, that's married.
Speaker 7: Yeah, we're married. Only don't think about calling.
Speaker 4: No, that is an assault.
Speaker 7: How do you meet these men where it's only texting?
Speaker 4: This guy I met, I'm riot.
Speaker 7: Yeah you know, Ryle waitlisted me for two years. I'm like,
Speaker 7: look at me, I'm the people's Are you serious?
Speaker 4: Yes, you can get into ryot and.
Speaker 7: You would think.
Speaker 3: I've had all my friends be like, yeahflisted.
Speaker 7: They hate to see a white woman happy.
Speaker 5: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: I would say to use me as a reference, but
Speaker 1: maybe that's not going to work for you. Although no,
Speaker 1: everyone I've referred is on it, so maybe you should
Speaker 1: use me as a reference.
Speaker 4: You have to enlist me to refer you, Damn.
Speaker 1: When you sign up or apply. You have to say,
Speaker 1: Chelsea handler picked the peace that you want. It doesn't
Speaker 1: work the opposite way. I'm pretty sure, Okay, just do it.
Speaker 1: I'm happy, of course.
Speaker 7: You know.
Speaker 4: You know what's so funny about my rider is I
Speaker 4: was the other day.
Speaker 1: I was like my Vanessa, we were on the road,
Speaker 1: my opener, and she was like, what's going on with Riot?
Speaker 1: Do you have anything going on with guys? And I
Speaker 1: said no, I never check it. She goes check it
Speaker 1: and I was like, well, I just never one ever
Speaker 1: hits me up. And then I go and I didn't
Speaker 1: have my alerts on.
Speaker 4: So there were like.
Speaker 1: Fourteen messages from guys that I had missed, but they
Speaker 1: were all from like six months before.
Speaker 7: I hadn't checked it.
Speaker 4: So I'm like responding to all these guys like six
Speaker 4: months later. I'm like, hey, are you still there?
Speaker 5: I'm married and saying oh you still want me?
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, let's take a quick break and we'll be
Speaker 1: right back, and we're back.
Speaker 7: We are. I have a question.
Speaker 1: Oh that's not how this podcast works, just to talk
Speaker 1: about it.
Speaker 7: Do you remember I interviewed you for the TikTok podcast?
Speaker 3: Yeah, sleay, bitch, that's all that conversation you like, I
Speaker 3: have two things to say. First of all, that conversation
Speaker 3: kind of changed my life because I was like, this
Speaker 3: is a whole new way of thinking I've never even
Speaker 3: like considered because I'm from like the Deep South, where
Speaker 3: it's like you go to college, you get married, you
Speaker 3: have a baby, all before you're twenty three. That conversation
Speaker 3: with you changed my life in like one or two ways.
Speaker 3: And then I just want to thank you for your
Speaker 3: service with that interview that you did with Harry Styles
Speaker 3: where it was one word answers because the world changed
Speaker 3: that day, like you shifted culture, like like the Hairy
Speaker 3: fans went fucking firal over that.
Speaker 4: Because he was giggling.
Speaker 7: I was giggling. I just wanted to thank you for
Speaker 7: your service.
Speaker 4: Oh that's funny. What happened with the conversation. How did
Speaker 4: the conversation we had changed your life?
Speaker 3: Where you were it was just so like everything that
Speaker 3: you kind of stand for of like, I'm not going
Speaker 3: to play by your playbook. I don't want to fucking
Speaker 3: get married. I don't want to have children like you
Speaker 3: talked about skiing naked and all those things, where I
Speaker 3: was just like, this is so like, I've never met
Speaker 3: a woman like you.
Speaker 4: Oh, well, there's so many of them.
Speaker 7: Well I would like to where's the Chelsea other clone factor?
Speaker 4: Well you're just like that.
Speaker 1: I mean, there are a lot of women are out
Speaker 1: here feeling the same way. So I'm just a loud
Speaker 1: one about it because I feel like there's a lack
Speaker 1: of representation. I don't feel there is, but now women
Speaker 1: are getting their voices in a big way. Hey, there
Speaker 1: window Catherine's husband a very incestuous podcast.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, it's Christian podcast.
Speaker 4: So what is that water?
Speaker 7: It's just water?
Speaker 4: Why why does it look like a beer?
Speaker 7: Because if that's kind of the branding, just to make
Speaker 7: you feel like you're it's.
Speaker 5: Just so tiny to me. I can't do the water
Speaker 5: in a cane.
Speaker 4: I don't like water in a can either.
Speaker 5: You don't like any water though.
Speaker 1: I don't like water, but I don't want to get
Speaker 1: you know, I just found out I have this like
Speaker 1: spinal impingement on my neck from probably from wiping out
Speaker 1: during skiing. But the guy, my doctor, was like, are
Speaker 1: you hydrated, And I'm like, no, I'm definitely not hydrated.
Speaker 7: This is brown. I'm the opposite of fun.
Speaker 1: I have to get an IV once a week because
Speaker 1: I fucking hate water so much. Yeah, well, now I
Speaker 1: drink it, but I have to doctor it up with electrolytes,
Speaker 1: which is good. But he was like, you have to
Speaker 1: be hydrated for this to heal because there's inflammation.
Speaker 4: And I'm like, oh, can't you just put the water
Speaker 4: in me anyway?
Speaker 1: Okay, we take callers and live people calling in for advice,
Speaker 1: so you better get your parental hat on.
Speaker 3: Okay, I'm feeling very maternal in this moment.
Speaker 1: Big Sister, which is a far cry from the idea
Speaker 1: of big Brother.
Speaker 2: Yes, well, our first question is just an email, j
Speaker 2: C says jay z J.
Speaker 4: He says, husband. I think it's actually Jesus Christ.
Speaker 5: Oh, she says, let's sing it wrong.
Speaker 4: First of all, it's Heyesu's Cristy.
Speaker 3: Oh.
Speaker 2: J C says, I love the podcast and I've been
Speaker 2: listening for a while now. You're both so hilarious and insightful.
Speaker 5: I've been dating this wonderful man for.
Speaker 2: Almost a year now, and he's the best boyfriend I've
Speaker 2: ever had. He treats me like a princess. He's hilarious, smart,
Speaker 2: and so so kind. Our sex life is great, except
Speaker 2: one thing. He calls himself daddy sometimes and has a
Speaker 2: script during sex about how he's my daddy and I'm
Speaker 2: his little girl. It's just a long, uncomfortable commentary that
Speaker 2: I'm not turned on by. Most of the time there's
Speaker 2: no daddy talk, but sometimes he gets really into it.
Speaker 2: I usually don't say anything because I've had my fun
Speaker 2: and I just keep quiet until he's finished.
Speaker 5: He does have some.
Speaker 2: Edy issues at times, and I think the daddy talk
Speaker 2: helps him get there. My question is do I say
Speaker 2: anything about how it doesn't turn me on? If I do,
Speaker 2: how the heck do I bring it up? Or do
Speaker 2: I just keep my mouth shut and enjoy the sex
Speaker 2: when it's about me and let him finish with his
Speaker 2: daddy talk?
Speaker 5: Please help JC.
Speaker 7: Oh, that's rough.
Speaker 4: First of all, Yes, you tell him that you don't
Speaker 4: like that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you have autonomy, and you have to in the
Speaker 1: name of every woman, you.
Speaker 4: Have to say, I don't like this. It doesn't turn
Speaker 4: me on.
Speaker 1: His erectile dysfunction is not your problem, and he's gonna
Speaker 1: have I'm sure something else in his arsenal that will.
Speaker 4: Turn him on. He cannot. You can't.
Speaker 1: Just that's like him fucking you in the ass and
Speaker 1: you're not liking it, but allowing him to do it.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's not the same thing as that, but
Speaker 1: it you know, there's no reason to do anything in.
Speaker 4: Sex that you're not comfortable with. You don't have to
Speaker 4: do that.
Speaker 1: So I'm sure if everything else is so great about him,
Speaker 1: which you say it is, tell him that you're not
Speaker 1: turned on by that.
Speaker 4: In fact, it kind of icks you out right right
Speaker 4: turn on. And I don't know how to say it.
Speaker 7: Just say it.
Speaker 4: You owe that to yourself.
Speaker 5: But maybe say it not during sex.
Speaker 3: Also, Yeah, that's like an over coffee kind of conversation maybe.
Speaker 1: Or maybe like an intimate honey, I know that turns
Speaker 1: you on. Just I would love another storyline to go
Speaker 1: with I'm tired of the story.
Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe mommy like to be called call himself mommy.
Speaker 4: Daddy and little girl is pretty specific.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And there's such a tether to like, what's deeply
Speaker 3: wrong with you when in your sexual kinks, So I
Speaker 3: feel like maybe maybe they need to talk through it.
Speaker 1: But listen, some people are into funky shit, like I
Speaker 1: like some dirty talk about weird shit, but not that.
Speaker 1: But you know, like with the right person, like I
Speaker 1: like to get like, I like a dynamic, But you
Speaker 1: just have to find out what you're I'm sure there's
Speaker 1: another option out there.
Speaker 5: Yeah, what if the other option is worse? That's my
Speaker 5: only fear.
Speaker 4: Well, that's then, I mean, I don't know.
Speaker 1: That's kind of I'm not going to sit and have
Speaker 1: sex with somebody who's calling themselves daddy. First of all,
Speaker 1: he should only pick that roll up if you call
Speaker 1: him daddy, Right, You don't just annoint yourself daddy.
Speaker 7: Igniting yourself daddy. Yeah, you didn't earn that, brother.
Speaker 4: No, Okay, what do we got next?
Speaker 2: Well, our next question comes from Jen. She'll be on
Speaker 2: the line with us here. Perfect, Dear Chelsea. First of all,
Speaker 2: I love your advice. It's direct and straightforward. I love
Speaker 2: my boyfriend so much. He's the sweetest, nicest man ever.
Speaker 2: To be honest, I'm hyper independent, but he just makes
Speaker 2: my little heart so happy. He's twenty one years my senior.
Speaker 2: I'm thirty seven and.
Speaker 5: He's fifty eight.
Speaker 2: Yes, I love old ass men, and no, I don't
Speaker 2: have daddy issues. The issue is he's a consultant and
Speaker 2: works all the time during the week. I get a
Speaker 2: good morning and a good night text and during the week.
Speaker 2: Other than that, it's like I don't exist. He does
Speaker 2: text back if I text, but it feels like I
Speaker 2: have to always reach out. I have gently let him
Speaker 2: know that i'd really like to hear from him more.
Speaker 2: I don't feel like we're dating unless it's the weekend.
Speaker 2: When I come over, he was a little frustrated, saying
Speaker 2: he has to talk all day on the phone, and
Speaker 2: he doesn't have the energy to talk on the phone
Speaker 2: at night. He said he's just depleted by the end
Speaker 2: of the day. Am I overreacting by thinking this is
Speaker 2: total bullshit? Before I sound like too much of a brat.
Speaker 2: I know he speaks to his sister once per week
Speaker 2: about a show they always watched together, and my love
Speaker 2: language also happens to be words of affirmation, but I
Speaker 2: find it very hard to feel loved and I don't
Speaker 2: get any words from him, much less words of affirmation.
Speaker 2: I'm supposed to move in with him soon, hopefully two
Speaker 2: months from now, but I'm wondering if that's the right
Speaker 2: move on my part. Are we just going to not
Speaker 2: talk during the week even though we live together. I
Speaker 2: can take any constructive criticisms you all can give.
Speaker 5: Thanks so much.
Speaker 7: Jen Hi, jud Jen Hi.
Speaker 5: Hi.
Speaker 4: This is our special guest Brittany for today Brusky Hi Gorge,
Speaker 4: Hi Hi.
Speaker 7: Okay, what a situation.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so tell us more. We read your letter, so
Speaker 1: you don't text with him even during the week.
Speaker 6: So I basically get like a gift in the morning,
Speaker 6: so it'll say good morning, and it's a gift. He's
Speaker 6: just a gift person. And then at night it's good night.
Speaker 6: I love you with a gift. That has been for
Speaker 6: like the past three four months. And sometimes we do talk,
Speaker 6: but it's rare. For instance, three weeks ago, he called
Speaker 6: me and he talked to me for about thirty seconds
Speaker 6: and then said, oh, I gotta go, my boss is
Speaker 6: calling me and I said okay, and then we didn't
Speaker 6: talk for the rest of the day and then I
Speaker 6: got my good night gifts. So I know, I know,
Speaker 6: it is kind of like a funny situation, but it's
Speaker 6: also like I don't know what to do.
Speaker 4: Well, okay I was.
Speaker 1: I mean, when you said you're going to move in
Speaker 1: with him, I just figured problem solved because obviously you're
Speaker 1: going to talk when you live together.
Speaker 6: Right, That's what I think too. But here's the thing,
Speaker 6: so I brought this up six months ago, and that's
Speaker 6: when he had and I call it his little temper tantrum,
Speaker 6: but really it wasn't. He was just frustrated.
Speaker 4: I get that.
Speaker 6: But that was six months ago, and I thought that
Speaker 6: we were going to move in within the next couple
Speaker 6: of months because this house would be done. Well I
Speaker 6: don't know when his house is going to be done now.
Speaker 6: I mean, they keep pushing things back, and so could
Speaker 6: it be another six months? And am I supposed to
Speaker 6: live like this for six months? And I know that
Speaker 6: there's like an end goal, but still it's very frustrating.
Speaker 4: And remind me again how long you guys have been together.
Speaker 6: So we've been together since November.
Speaker 4: Twenty twenty one, so a couple of years.
Speaker 6: Yeah, almost a couple of years.
Speaker 4: Yes, And it.
Speaker 6: Hasn't always been like this, But I can understand he
Speaker 6: you know, he has a lot on his mind and
Speaker 6: a lot on his plate. But when I brought it
Speaker 6: up a while ago, I said, look, I'm sure the
Speaker 6: president of the United States still calls and texts his
Speaker 6: wife and he's got a lot more shit going on
Speaker 6: than you. Trust me, oh am, I allowed to say shit,
Speaker 6: Yeah what, yes, yes, you are the show right.
Speaker 7: Are you? Yes?
Speaker 5: But I'm nervous.
Speaker 1: Sorry, Oh no, don't It's okay. Yes, you could say
Speaker 1: whatever you want, thank you, KND pussy fuck twist, I
Speaker 1: mean titty twist or whatever, just twist twist. So okay,
Speaker 1: a couple of things, Brittany, do you want to jump
Speaker 1: in or do you want me to start?
Speaker 3: My question is well, I guess more of a statement
Speaker 3: is if he wanted to, he would like. I think
Speaker 3: that that's the overarching thing here is he's kind of
Speaker 3: making it evident that communicating with his partner is not
Speaker 3: really top of his priority list, agreed, even after like
Speaker 3: bringing the issue up to him. So that's kind of this, like,
Speaker 3: is he just willfully ignoring me on purpose?
Speaker 7: Does he really care about me? Am?
Speaker 3: I just an afterthought? Like that's that's where my spiral
Speaker 3: would start.
Speaker 6: Absolutely, I even wrote all my bullet points down. That's
Speaker 6: just the person that I am. That's weird, I know,
Speaker 6: but I just want to get it all out and
Speaker 6: I want to make sure like I'm hitting every single
Speaker 6: bullet point because I want him to know how I feel.
Speaker 6: And this isn't like a I'm blaming you. This is
Speaker 6: more like a I feel this way, so please take
Speaker 6: care of it because if you don't, And I hate ultimatums,
Speaker 6: and this is kind of an ultimatum. But I feel
Speaker 6: like I'm such a strong person and I've been married
Speaker 6: and divorced and I just know what I want in life.
Speaker 6: And if you're not it, that's okay, that's totally fine.
Speaker 6: And if you can't meet me here, which I don't
Speaker 6: think it's a lot to ask to call me once
Speaker 6: a week.
Speaker 7: No, that's bare minimum.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that's literal bare minimum.
Speaker 1: So and the idea of you want more interaction, he
Speaker 1: wants zero pretty much interaction except against during the week, right,
Speaker 1: So in a relationship there is compromise, like he's got
Speaker 1: to meet you in the middle. He's just doing what
Speaker 1: he wants without regard for your desires, without making any effort,
Speaker 1: especially when I know how that feels when somebody's like, oh,
Speaker 1: i'll call you right back and then or I have
Speaker 1: to get off the phone. You expect a call back
Speaker 1: when they are done with their boss. So that's neglectful.
Speaker 1: And it's just it's not a compromise. It's not fifty
Speaker 1: to fifty what you're describing. You have needs, He doesn't
Speaker 1: have to meet every single one of your needs. That's
Speaker 1: also an unfair demand. But he has to be able
Speaker 1: to come to meet you where you are and say,
Speaker 1: this is what I can do, even though I hate
Speaker 1: talking on the phone. You know, let's make sure we
Speaker 1: connect midweek or a couple of times a week, whatever
Speaker 1: would make you happy. That would be, you know, a
Speaker 1: move in the right direction. And it doesn't have to
Speaker 1: be an ultimatum. You can just declare that and then
Speaker 1: see how he responds to it, and then you're going
Speaker 1: to gather all the information you need. He'll either be
Speaker 1: able to do it or he won't. Right, And you
Speaker 1: shouldn't have to move in with someone to get to
Speaker 1: see them exactly.
Speaker 6: You know, we do spend weekends together. And I don't
Speaker 6: tell him this, but this is how I feel when
Speaker 6: I see him on Friday night, like the whole week
Speaker 6: is just dumped on me, and it's like, oh, I
Speaker 6: did this, and this happened, and then we did this,
Speaker 6: and I'm like, can we break it up during the
Speaker 6: week and tell me these things because right now I've
Speaker 6: had a full week and I'm just exhausted and I
Speaker 6: just want to chill and smoke some weed and hang
Speaker 6: out and you know, do my thing. And so it's
Speaker 6: it's a little bit hard, and I'm not afraid to
Speaker 6: talk to him about it. I'm going to talk to
Speaker 6: him about it because I feel like I.
Speaker 4: Deserve more and good.
Speaker 6: I am a strong woman. I can do it all alone.
Speaker 6: I can be by myself, no big deal. The thing
Speaker 6: is that he is just such an amazing person. And
Speaker 6: maybe you know, I didn't make it super clear. Maybe
Speaker 6: I just need to be like, hey, this isn't going
Speaker 6: to work for me.
Speaker 2: Or maybe it's hey, Wednesday nights, let's either go grab
Speaker 2: a drink or let's have like a half hour phone
Speaker 2: call just being like, you know what, let's throw in
Speaker 2: a midweek thing. But also, is there a way that
Speaker 2: you guys can move in together before his house is done?
Speaker 5: Is that possible?
Speaker 6: I wish? I mean honestly, so right now he has
Speaker 6: kind of like a luxury trailer on his property because
Speaker 6: he has like a full like kind of farm with
Speaker 6: the animals, so he has to be there. But I
Speaker 6: mean it's such a small thing, and me moving in
Speaker 6: my stuff.
Speaker 4: Got it?
Speaker 6: Yeah, And I actually really like this time myself alone
Speaker 6: because I was in fifteen year marriage before this, and
Speaker 6: it ended in twenty twenty. And I am totally fine
Speaker 6: living on my own. You know, I like it.
Speaker 1: You see, you seem very together and very grounded and competent.
Speaker 1: So like, I'm not worried about your situation at all.
Speaker 1: I think you're going to handle everything the way that
Speaker 1: it needs to be handled, and you have absolutely every
Speaker 1: right to say what you want, and then he can
Speaker 1: show you that he's moving towards that direction.
Speaker 4: You know, he doesn't have to bend over backwards for
Speaker 4: you all the time.
Speaker 1: But it's just a consideration that you deserve and when
Speaker 1: you put it and frame it like I just feel
Speaker 1: like I deserve better or not better, say I deserve
Speaker 1: more from somebody who's I'm in a committed relationship with,
Speaker 1: and for that to be too much to ask from
Speaker 1: you doesn't make me feel good about us.
Speaker 6: Yeah, and that's exactly what I've written down. You know.
Speaker 6: All my bullet points are just like, if you wanted to,
Speaker 6: you definitely would, And to me, you're showing me you
Speaker 6: don't want to, and that's okay, that's okay you don't
Speaker 6: want to. I don't want to force you. However, that
Speaker 6: doesn't mean that I have to be in this relationship
Speaker 6: as well. I mean it would break my heart, of course,
Speaker 6: but I mean it is what it is. You can't
Speaker 6: force someone to do something.
Speaker 1: But I think that's also stating it like that, saying
Speaker 1: you know, if you can do this, that would be
Speaker 1: great and that would be significant in us remaining together.
Speaker 1: But I have to be honest, I'm starting to feel
Speaker 1: like you're not willing to compromise and that's making me
Speaker 1: question things and that would be heartbreaking for me. But
Speaker 1: I also need a certain amount of respect or consideration about,
Speaker 1: you know, what you desire rather than what's he desires,
Speaker 1: which is not talking on the phone at all.
Speaker 7: Right, I was gonna say, also there's like this.
Speaker 4: Maybe I should date him. Actually, I also don't want
Speaker 4: to talk on the phone.
Speaker 6: I would love to just you know.
Speaker 3: There's also this weird dynamic of it seems like it's
Speaker 3: all about him all the time.
Speaker 6: And you know, I think maybe he is a little
Speaker 6: bit that way. I wouldn't say that he's a selfish person.
Speaker 6: I think that sometimes he can become self centered. I've
Speaker 6: never held that against him. However, the man when I'm.
Speaker 4: With him, he just adores me.
Speaker 6: He loves on me. He buys me anything I want.
Speaker 6: If I literally go into any store and say, okay,
Speaker 6: I want this, he's like cool and he just buys it.
Speaker 6: And I know for some people that's like, oh, well, that's.
Speaker 7: Not a big deal.
Speaker 6: For me, it's so nice because I'm like, really extra,
Speaker 6: I'm gonna I'm gonna be honest, and I'm like, oh wow,
Speaker 6: a man wants to buy me stuff in dote on me.
Speaker 6: But it's like the weirdest thing. Even my friends think
Speaker 6: it's so weird. And I've even asked him, like, do
Speaker 6: you have another family that you're entering.
Speaker 5: It crossed my mind.
Speaker 6: Are they all living in this trailer with you? No?
Speaker 6: But but you know, like I've asked him and he's like, no,
Speaker 6: absolutely not. And I do see how focused he is
Speaker 6: and he enjoys his job. He's very much focused. But
Speaker 6: you know, me being younger and also maybe just kind
Speaker 6: of a little bit brattier than he's normally used to
Speaker 6: and not I'm really not a brat, but when I
Speaker 6: want something, it's like, can we just do this, Let's
Speaker 6: just do this. You know. I think I'm a little
Speaker 6: bit of a challenge for him, but sort of in
Speaker 6: a good way. And I'm really hoping this all ends up. Yeah,
Speaker 6: I want it, Tom.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And don't be a brat when you have this conversation,
Speaker 1: because there's nothing bratty about it, right, you know, there's
Speaker 1: nothing whiny or complaining. It's I think it's much more
Speaker 1: effective to just say this is what I need in
Speaker 1: a non emotional way, so that it helps a little
Speaker 1: bit more, has a little bit more heft than just
Speaker 1: being like I need you to call me. You know,
Speaker 1: it's yeah, it's not a needy thing, it's a respect thing.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 2: And putting a date on it of like, hey, let's
Speaker 2: talk for twenty or thirty minutes on Wednesdays gives an
Speaker 2: actionable goal that like either meeting or not meeting, rather
Speaker 2: than like let's just talk more, which is more vague. Right,
Speaker 2: But Jen, let us know how it goes. Okay, I'm
Speaker 2: interested to hear.
Speaker 4: I want to hear how the conversation goes. To follow
Speaker 4: back up.
Speaker 6: Okay, okay, we'll do Thanks everyone.
Speaker 1: Okay, thanks honey, goodbye, Okay, thank you, bye bye bye.
Speaker 4: Catherine was done with that call. She's like, Okay, we
Speaker 4: gotta move on. That goes She's like, I want to
Speaker 4: get a kidney transplant. Catherine's like okay, well.
Speaker 5: Good like goodbye.
Speaker 7: Well.
Speaker 5: Our next color is Hallie. She is dear Chelsea.
Speaker 2: I'm the youngest of three girls, and my oldest sister
Speaker 2: has a very tense relationship with our mom. She immediately
Speaker 2: goes on the defensive around her, and every time they're
Speaker 2: together they get into at least one little snippy conversation.
Speaker 2: I'll admit our mom can be difficult, but I think
Speaker 2: my middle sister and I are more able to see
Speaker 2: that the things she says and does are often coming
Speaker 2: from a place of insecurity. Even if we get into
Speaker 2: an argument with her, we're more able to move on
Speaker 2: and give her some grace.
Speaker 5: Our oldest sister just.
Speaker 2: Seems to assume the worst and hang on to every
Speaker 2: little thing. Then she'll complain to us about it, and
Speaker 2: we're not sure what to say. I think she wants
Speaker 2: her kids to continue to have a relationship with our mom,
Speaker 2: but it feels like she's at a crossroads and needs
Speaker 2: to decide how she's going to move forward with her
Speaker 2: own relationship with her, as the current state of it
Speaker 2: makes it unpleasant for everyone. The irony is that my
Speaker 2: oldest sister and our mom are more similar than they
Speaker 2: care to admit. How can my middle sister and I
Speaker 2: help our older sister figure out how to improve her
Speaker 2: relationship with our mom, what boundaries to set and what
Speaker 2: conversations to have? Thanks for any advice you can give.
Speaker 4: Hallie Hi, Halle Hi, Hi.
Speaker 1: This is Brittany Broski. She's our special guest today.
Speaker 7: Hallie, Hey, nice to meet.
Speaker 1: It's funny I had a conversation with a girlfriend this
Speaker 1: morning on the phone because to her sister just was
Speaker 1: visiting her and she's like, everything my sister does annoys
Speaker 1: the shit out of me, and my friend is just
Speaker 1: the most, in my opinion, is the sweetest, most easy
Speaker 1: going person in the world. So to hear her even
Speaker 1: talk like that about her sister is it's always just
Speaker 1: a test, right, Like it's basically the universe testing you,
Speaker 1: because if you keep failing the test that it keeps
Speaker 1: triggering you and triggering you. And you have to basically
Speaker 1: talk to your sister about treating your mom with kid
Speaker 1: gloves and actually treating your mom like she's.
Speaker 4: A kid, think of her like a kid.
Speaker 1: And even though that's fucked up, because you're the kids,
Speaker 1: you and your youngest sister.
Speaker 9: I'm the youngest, so it's me and my middle sister.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you and your middle sister are obviously okay with
Speaker 1: it and you're not taking it to task and it's
Speaker 1: not disrupting your life. Right.
Speaker 4: I think you're right.
Speaker 1: I think that makes sense, and they're probably the similarity
Speaker 1: between the two is why they are clashing, which is
Speaker 1: very obvious. Also, so it's a very easy like psychology lesson,
Speaker 1: but on a spiritual level, like in terms of energetic
Speaker 1: being and your vibration and being cool and attracting goodness,
Speaker 1: it is that you are lifting yourself up out of
Speaker 1: kind of a low vibe when you have room and
Speaker 1: space for people that you don't necessarily want to have
Speaker 1: room and space for, or that annoy you, or that
Speaker 1: trigger you, or all of the history that's involved. So
Speaker 1: for her, if there's any way for you to engage
Speaker 1: her in a conversation where you're talking like this about it, like, hey,
Speaker 1: treat mom like she's a little kid. Let go of
Speaker 1: the anger, Like try to just use it as a practice,
Speaker 1: Like even when I am annoyed with someone, I make
Speaker 1: it a note to send a text out to them
Speaker 1: and say, hey, just thinking about you love you just
Speaker 1: be because I want to flip the switch on my
Speaker 1: own script in my head, you know, put out love
Speaker 1: and when you're feeling negative, like it'll change her whole
Speaker 1: entire life if she's able to let go of the tension,
Speaker 1: And it won't happen overnight. But it is a practice,
Speaker 1: just like anything you do to be a better person
Speaker 1: or be a more mindful person and practice loving kindness.
Speaker 1: She needs love your mother. She's obviously damaged. Your sister's
Speaker 1: obviously damaged from your mother, so she's holding on to it.
Speaker 1: But what a great victory lap would it be for
Speaker 1: your sister if she could release that and look at
Speaker 1: her with pity and treat her like a little girl
Speaker 1: instead of like she's expecting her to be your mom. Right?
Speaker 9: And what do you think about the fact that she
Speaker 9: our oldest sister kind of puts me and our middle
Speaker 9: sister in the middle a little bit and kind of
Speaker 9: will express her grievances about our mom to us. And again,
Speaker 9: I mean, I think we have challenges with her too,
Speaker 9: so I can on the one hand, I can see it,
Speaker 9: and I want her to feel supported in that, but
Speaker 9: I also don't think it's healthy for her then to
Speaker 9: be coming to us with those difficulties that she's having.
Speaker 4: I agree with that wholeheartedly.
Speaker 1: She shouldn't And you can say that in a very
Speaker 1: loving way as well, like, hey, I love both of you.
Speaker 1: It's upsets me every time you come to me talking
Speaker 1: about Mom. It's upsetting, Like, I just want you guys
Speaker 1: to get along. And I know it's not as easy
Speaker 1: for you, clearly, but I think that there might be
Speaker 1: a reason why it's not easier for you. That might
Speaker 1: be your challenge. Like that's a test, and if you
Speaker 1: can get past that, and you can ace that test,
Speaker 1: then there's a whole bunch of other.
Speaker 4: New stuff in the world that you're not going to.
Speaker 4: You know, you minimize the irritation of that person by
Speaker 4: just showering them with love, acceptance, and understanding and not
Speaker 4: looking for them to deliver something they've never shown you
Speaker 4: in the first place.
Speaker 2: There is a book called The Dance of Anger that
Speaker 2: you might recommend to your sister.
Speaker 5: It helps sort of unlatch.
Speaker 2: Some of that repetitive behavior of like going straight into anger.
Speaker 2: I know I had a pretty strained relationship with my
Speaker 2: dad maybe ten years ago, and it's got a lot better,
Speaker 2: and I think you know there is room for us
Speaker 2: to learn and change and grow, but your sister does
Speaker 2: have to be, as Chelsea said, like making that effort
Speaker 2: to do that. I think it can just stay stagnant
Speaker 2: or get worse if someone's not actively trying to improve
Speaker 2: the situation.
Speaker 9: Right, Yeah, I think I think she's kind of in
Speaker 9: like a constant state of fight or flight, you know,
Speaker 9: with our mom, So that makes retal sense trying to
Speaker 9: help her lovingly, help her get to that place of
Speaker 9: having that dialogue with herself and figuring out what she
Speaker 9: can do to take steps to move forward.
Speaker 1: Because usually when you're acting like that, it's because you're
Speaker 1: seeing a part.
Speaker 4: Of you that you do not like.
Speaker 1: Like the similarities in you, we give the best advice
Speaker 1: of what we need to seek the most. When you
Speaker 1: see somebody that drives you crazy, it's because they're representing
Speaker 1: something in you yourself that you don't like.
Speaker 4: Brittany, were you going to say something, I was just
Speaker 4: gonna say, Yeah, it's an active choice.
Speaker 3: Yeah, Relationships like this are little moments of active choices
Speaker 3: where either you or your sisters are choosing whether or
Speaker 3: not to engage. And, like Chelsea said, how you're approaching it,
Speaker 3: to flip the switch and be like, in this moment,
Speaker 3: I'm recognizing this feeling of you know, the fighting is starting,
Speaker 3: or that pissed me off, or here we go back
Speaker 3: to the same shit, where making an active choice to
Speaker 3: just take a breath and respond differently because it is
Speaker 3: a choice, you know, Like that is to keep that
Speaker 3: in mind, that you have the power over how you
Speaker 3: react to a situation. All your siblings do, and your
Speaker 3: mom does too. But it's I deal with this with
Speaker 3: my mom where I am the parent and my mother
Speaker 3: is the child, and I have to gentle parent my
Speaker 3: own mom and it's fucking infuriating, and I have to
Speaker 3: take a breath and I have to like do breathing
Speaker 3: exercises in the bathroom. But like it's made all the difference,
Speaker 3: and it's a hard, hard thing. Family shit is so
Speaker 3: hard feeling you, feeling you sis, dang.
Speaker 1: Thank you.
Speaker 9: To your point, I think, of course, then I can
Speaker 9: decide how I react to them having their own reactions,
Speaker 9: you know exactly, So I can decide that I'm not
Speaker 9: going to have an inflammatory reaction to that circumstance. However,
Speaker 9: I think, like there are kids involved who are hearing them,
Speaker 9: you know, disagree. So I feel like, you know, I
Speaker 9: do want to be able to help them if I can.
Speaker 1: Yeah, And I think it's just it's all love based,
Speaker 1: it's all expression of love.
Speaker 4: For instance, my sister in law is.
Speaker 1: Annoying to me, and I really argue a lot about
Speaker 1: politics and stuff, but I realize how pointless it is
Speaker 1: to engage, right, So, and this has been a work
Speaker 1: in progress for many years. And so now when I
Speaker 1: see her, I just like shower her with love and affection,
Speaker 1: just shower her.
Speaker 4: With love and affection.
Speaker 1: And it kind of like my feelings towards her have diminished.
Speaker 1: My anger towards her has diminished, and I am feeling like, oh,
Speaker 1: she's just not open to our accessible, like she's she's
Speaker 1: been indoctrinated. She's Russian, you know, like she doesn't she's
Speaker 1: never going to believe.
Speaker 4: That food is a bad guy. That's sad. Actually, that's
Speaker 4: she's been brainwashed and indoctrinated.
Speaker 1: So instead of going at her with anger, now I'm
Speaker 1: just trying. And this is I'm trying. I haven't, you know,
Speaker 1: been completely successful thus far, but I'm working hard to
Speaker 1: make sure that my interactions with her are just love
Speaker 1: based and there isn't any acrimony.
Speaker 5: If all else fails.
Speaker 2: You know, sometimes a little ant anxiety, a little out
Speaker 2: of anne or something like that before you have a
Speaker 2: family get together doesn't hurt.
Speaker 4: That's a great idea.
Speaker 5: Actually, yeah, totally edibles.
Speaker 4: Does she take edibles?
Speaker 1: Your sister doesn't sound she sounds like she might need
Speaker 1: an edible though, right, you might want to slip a
Speaker 1: wanting to situations. It's not a bad idea, Yeah, And
Speaker 1: then you could bring that up too, go like, let's
Speaker 1: figure this out together, Like how can we make it
Speaker 1: easier for you?
Speaker 9: Yeah, that's it too, Like I she's not having a
Speaker 9: good time exactly, and I think she wants to be
Speaker 9: able to have a good time with our mom and
Speaker 9: with our family, and you know, so I can see
Speaker 9: that she wants that, but I think she just doesn't
Speaker 9: know how to get there.
Speaker 4: Right.
Speaker 1: Well, she's lucky, first of all to have a sister
Speaker 1: like you that cares so much about your family dynamic.
Speaker 1: That's so sweet and that's exactly what sisters are good for.
Speaker 4: Brittany, do you have any sisters?
Speaker 7: I do.
Speaker 3: I have a sister and a brother, and there's a
Speaker 3: big age difference between us, Like I'm six and seven
Speaker 3: years older than them, but it's just so funny how
Speaker 3: we were all raised in the same.
Speaker 7: House and we're so so different. And I'm seeing that
Speaker 7: you too.
Speaker 3: Where it's like, yeah, yeah, that oldest child gets the
Speaker 3: brunt of it, Like I definitely got the brunt of it.
Speaker 3: And it's funny how it affects you so differently than
Speaker 3: like you being the youngest, Like it's just you know,
Speaker 3: you're in the same house, but you're such different people.
Speaker 7: That's such a Families are so funny.
Speaker 9: They are they are well, thank you, thank you all.
Speaker 9: I really appreciate it.
Speaker 4: Oh well, you're cute. I like your sweater, I like
Speaker 4: your how much?
Speaker 9: Good luck with everything, God speed, Yeah, thanks everybody.
Speaker 5: Ye bye.
Speaker 1: It's funny because when we talk about siblings, like when
Speaker 1: there is an age difference as I have in my
Speaker 1: family and you do too. You know, there are two
Speaker 1: different kind of ways to look at it, because I
Speaker 1: always think every your sisters and brothers.
Speaker 4: Are the only ones who knew what happened. They are
Speaker 4: the only ones who know exactly what went down in
Speaker 4: your household.
Speaker 1: So my connection to my brothers and sisters is very
Speaker 1: strong because we were so disfrunct. Our parents were pretty dysfunctional.
Speaker 1: I mean we you know, never went hungry or anything.
Speaker 4: But it was just a hot mess.
Speaker 1: And then you hear from other people that are like,
Speaker 1: oh no, we had totally different childhoods, even though they're
Speaker 1: from the same set of parents. They had because of
Speaker 1: the age gap, had different childhoods. So I guess at
Speaker 1: least my parents were dysfunctionally consistent.
Speaker 7: Yeah, yeah, everyone got it fairly. Yeah.
Speaker 2: My older brother and my younger brother are fourteen years apart. Wow,
Speaker 2: and there's like a boy and a girl and then
Speaker 2: I'm girl and then boy. But we're so far in
Speaker 2: distance from each other as far as age goes. My
Speaker 2: older brother likes to say, like, I'm glad I got
Speaker 2: out of the house before my parents got bored with parenting.
Speaker 5: Like, but I loved it. I mean it was great.
Speaker 2: They still parented, but it was like we had sugary
Speaker 2: cereal and they had Raisin brand, you know that sort
Speaker 2: of you.
Speaker 7: Know, a little lax When you get to that fourth kid,
Speaker 7: it's just like, yeah, I ever did.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Like they write you a note saying good luck.
Speaker 7: Oh truly.
Speaker 2: My parents traveled all the time when we were growing up,
Speaker 2: people are be like, where are your parents now?
Speaker 5: I'm like, I don't know, They're just gone. Someone's saying
Speaker 5: with us somewhere. Yeah, we had fun.
Speaker 7: We had a good time.
Speaker 3: My siblings, they're my half siblings. So, like my parents
Speaker 3: got divorced when I was one or two, and then
Speaker 3: my dad remarried when I was four, and then from
Speaker 3: then on, I've had half siblings. And it was It's
Speaker 3: so funny because I was always thought one out obviously
Speaker 3: because I was older, and I was going back and
Speaker 3: forth because of custody battles and all that.
Speaker 4: And oh were their custody battles.
Speaker 3: Constantly growing up until like high school. But it was
Speaker 3: like my siblings just kind of watched that, you know,
Speaker 3: and they were like, who is.
Speaker 7: What do you mean?
Speaker 3: Brittany has a mom like another mom, Like they just
Speaker 3: didn't understand, but kind of understood, and it didn't really
Speaker 3: affect like all through that, it didn't really affect our relationship,
Speaker 3: which is cool, like you said, you know, like we
Speaker 3: all grew up in the same house. Like I was
Speaker 3: still being parented by my dad and my stepmom the
Speaker 3: same way that they were, and my dad really made
Speaker 3: an effort to like, if one of y'all's punished this way,
Speaker 3: the other one will be too, you know, like there's
Speaker 3: no special treatment, there's no whatever. And I think that
Speaker 3: really really paid off because I feel like some parents,
Speaker 3: you know, you have to do different parenting techniques for
Speaker 3: different kids, and that shows up in their adult life
Speaker 3: of like I was never told no or I was
Speaker 3: never this that. So I'm very fortunate that I had
Speaker 3: parents with level heads, especially in the midst of a divorce,
Speaker 3: like a nasty divorce too, where some people aren't so lucky.
Speaker 3: So it's an interesting dynamic with half siblings too, because
Speaker 3: it's like we're kind of blood related but also kind of.
Speaker 5: Not yeah, not at all.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that is interesting. And also just to be a.
Speaker 1: Child of divorce and all of that that comes with that,
Speaker 1: because it can be one experience for one person a
Speaker 1: quite different one for another person. So when they were
Speaker 1: having custody battle over you, how did they drag you
Speaker 1: into that?
Speaker 4: Did your mom or dad?
Speaker 7: Not? Really?
Speaker 3: They never argued in front of me, which I'm very
Speaker 3: very thankful for, but I did like every other weekend,
Speaker 3: I was back and forth from probably like the ages
Speaker 3: of six to about six sixth grade, and that was hard,
Speaker 3: you know, like I don't know where I'm gonna be
Speaker 3: and I have homework that's due, but I left this
Speaker 3: at my mom's house and I need.
Speaker 7: It's just a mess. And it was like.
Speaker 3: Resuing for custody over and over and it was just messy.
Speaker 4: But well, at least you were wanted, period.
Speaker 7: Yeah, what a what a good problem to have.
Speaker 4: They want me to look that both parents wanted action. Yeah,
Speaker 4: that's nice.
Speaker 1: I'm always so touched when a man is so determined
Speaker 1: to get custody. And then I'm like, listen to what
Speaker 1: you're saying. Parents, Why do we give that so much
Speaker 1: credit for behaving like a fucking father.
Speaker 7: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Well, let's take a quick break and we'll be back
Speaker 2: to finish up with Chelsea and Brittany.
Speaker 5: And we're back, and we're back, and I have one
Speaker 5: more question.
Speaker 2: It's it's a little long winded, but I think it's
Speaker 2: an interesting one.
Speaker 1: To excuse me, Brittany just had to go to the
Speaker 1: bathroom in studios.
Speaker 4: Are you okay?
Speaker 5: Hey there in the corner?
Speaker 4: Okay, sorry about that, Sorry about that. Listeners, my fault.
Speaker 4: She's just wrapping up some COVID.
Speaker 7: Yeah, it's just a finishing up here really quick.
Speaker 4: Just top it off for COVID with her beer.
Speaker 7: Well.
Speaker 2: In the vein of Jen getting bought things from her boyfriend,
Speaker 2: Ashley says, Dear Chelsea, I'm twenty eight and I've been
Speaker 2: dating my boyfriend, who's twenty nine, for a year and
Speaker 2: a half. He's an amazing and loving man and surpasses
Speaker 2: all of the other men I've been with. The problem
Speaker 2: I keep coming back to, though, is our differing views
Speaker 2: on money. I was raised in a very broke, conservative
Speaker 2: household until I left home in my early twenties, but
Speaker 2: that really set me back in my education and career.
Speaker 2: I'm an extremely hard worker and have been even before
Speaker 2: I graduated high school, but that's mostly been out of necessity.
Speaker 2: In truth, I've always dreamed of going to art school
Speaker 2: and finding a creative career I enjoy. His life is
Speaker 2: the complete opposite. He owned a business and now has
Speaker 2: a great job, which he loves. He's not extremely wealthy,
Speaker 2: but he's very secure and the important things are paid
Speaker 2: for in full, including his home. I've moved in with
Speaker 2: him and things are good, but I'm constantly struggling, whereas
Speaker 2: he's comfortable financially. He used to pay for a lot
Speaker 2: when it came to dates and other little things, but
Speaker 2: as we became more serious, he made it very clear
Speaker 2: that he wants to share expenses. He's even asking me
Speaker 2: to pay rent. I understand splitting the utilities we both use,
Speaker 2: but he wants me to pay him for rent even
Speaker 2: though his house is paid off. Currently, I work a
Speaker 2: full time nine to five job that I don't like,
Speaker 2: and also waitress in the evenings and weekends to supplement
Speaker 2: my income and pay off the data I accumulated by
Speaker 2: moving out of my home before I was financially able.
Speaker 2: I'm also taking some courses online so I can continue
Speaker 2: my education. I've noticed some resentment building up as he
Speaker 2: sees me constantly struggling and tired, but doesn't seem inclined
Speaker 2: to alleviate the burden.
Speaker 5: There's no bigger.
Speaker 2: Turn off than when a guy asks you to split
Speaker 2: dinner when you're just thinking of all the bills waiting
Speaker 2: for you. I'm plagued with guilt for even thinking this,
Speaker 2: when women are encouraged to be independent and successful and
Speaker 2: not rely on a man. But I'd love nothing more
Speaker 2: than to go back to school and find a career
Speaker 2: I enjoy, but it's practically impossible for me to do
Speaker 2: that on my own if I still want to cover
Speaker 2: my bills and debt before adding on to it. I
Speaker 2: don't expect him to fund my lifestyle or put me
Speaker 2: through college, but help with our shared expenses and activities
Speaker 2: will go a long way, as I have to think
Speaker 2: about every dollar I spent. At the same time, I
Speaker 2: know I could find someone who's willing to do that
Speaker 2: for me, and I've had plenty of opportunities to pursue
Speaker 2: other relationships where I'm supported financially. Even with my waitressing job,
Speaker 2: I constantly get offers by men who want to whisk
Speaker 2: me off my feet and fund my lifestyle, but that's
Speaker 2: not for me. I have no desire to leave, as
Speaker 2: I'm very happy with the love he provides, but my
Speaker 2: life can be exhausting. He sees how happy I am
Speaker 2: when I'm working on my art and knows what I
Speaker 2: want to do with my life. But he's so practical
Speaker 2: and approaches relationships as two separate people improving themselves on
Speaker 2: their own. Should I stick it out even though I'm struggling, Ashley.
Speaker 1: I would first of all say, who cares if men
Speaker 1: at restaurants are offering to whisk you away. You don't
Speaker 1: want that. That's not even part of the conversation. Because
Speaker 1: of course you can find somebody else to pay your
Speaker 1: bills if that's what you're looking for. But if you're
Speaker 1: looking for mutual respect within a relationship, I don't think
Speaker 1: it's crazy to ask for a little bit of help,
Speaker 1: especially when he owns his house. I mean paying rent
Speaker 1: for somebody who bought their house. That when you're in
Speaker 1: a loving relationship, is a little strange.
Speaker 7: That's what you do.
Speaker 4: Like that doesn't sound kosher. And you're working multiple jobs.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's not like she's not her death. She's hustling
Speaker 5: one thing.
Speaker 1: If you're sitting around lazy and you're like I don't
Speaker 1: want to work, you're gonna pay for everything?
Speaker 4: No, you're not doing that.
Speaker 1: I don't think he should be funding your lifestyle either,
Speaker 1: but he can definitely be helping if he's in a
Speaker 1: more advantageous position than you are, which clearly he is.
Speaker 1: So yes, it's worth a conversation about support. And it's
Speaker 1: not a demand or a ultimatum.
Speaker 4: Or anything like that.
Speaker 1: It's like, hey, I'm really having a hard time here,
Speaker 1: me paying you rent feels weird. I'm totally down to
Speaker 1: split utilities, but every time you want to split the bill, like,
Speaker 1: it makes me feel like we're in a business relationship
Speaker 1: and I'm going through this time and you want to
Speaker 1: get your degree and move towards that art passion that
Speaker 1: you have and go back to school at all of
Speaker 1: those things. And this is exactly the time where you
Speaker 1: need support from your partner and in pursuit of that.
Speaker 1: And it won't last forever, but you need it during
Speaker 1: this time. And that's a very reasonable thing to talk about.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and it's also to improve not just your situation,
Speaker 2: but your situation together. You know, his help during this
Speaker 2: time will give you, guys a better life ostensibly in
Speaker 2: the future.
Speaker 7: Right. I think there's also I mean, be sensitive, you
Speaker 7: know what I mean.
Speaker 3: Like this guy sounds like, all right, well, everything's fifty
Speaker 3: to fifty, Like life doesn't really work like that. Sometimes
Speaker 3: sometimes ideally it should be fifty to fifty, but in
Speaker 3: a situation like this. My best friend's kind of in
Speaker 3: a similar situation where she makes significantly less than her
Speaker 3: husband and they split bills fifty to fifty and recently,
Speaker 3: I mean, in the last six months. She kind of
Speaker 3: was like, I am struggling and I am in a committed,
Speaker 3: loving marriage, and this just doesn't feel fair. And she
Speaker 3: approached it with her husband and they worked it out
Speaker 3: where of course, because he makes more money and they
Speaker 3: live together, they share everything, he'll pay for more, you know,
Speaker 3: like it's like seventy thirty now, And that is totally
Speaker 3: because y'all are literally married. It's the same legally in
Speaker 3: front of the Lord and all his witnesses. I just
Speaker 3: think that there's logic and then there's functional relationships. So
Speaker 3: in that situation, it feels like cut her some slack, dude,
Speaker 3: you know, if you really love her and you see
Speaker 3: how she's struggling, and you see how she wants to
Speaker 3: dedicate She doesn't want to fucking work seven jobs. She
Speaker 3: wants to dedicate time to her art whatever. Help her
Speaker 3: do that because you love her, and it's not you know,
Speaker 3: sacrificing her autonomy or her independence or her whatever. You
Speaker 3: can still be in visuals in a relationship, but I
Speaker 3: think that, yeah, just be fucking for real, be.
Speaker 7: So for real.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think working one job should be plenty in
Speaker 2: this situation. You know, if you have a conversation with
Speaker 2: him about like I want to quit my waitressing job.
Speaker 2: I want to keep this job, and like you said,
Speaker 2: maybe not splitting things fifty to fifty as far as
Speaker 2: the bill goes. But there's also a way to do
Speaker 2: it where you're each paying the same percentage of the
Speaker 2: bill according to your income. You feel it the same amount.
Speaker 7: And please don't.
Speaker 1: Introduce the idea when you're having this conversation of other
Speaker 1: men or other opportunities.
Speaker 4: That's not important. Yes, it's not good to dangle that
Speaker 4: stuff in front of people. You know.
Speaker 1: I had a boyfriend who's like, do you know how
Speaker 1: many people are hitting me up on Instagram? I'm like, go, then,
Speaker 1: no thought about who's dming you on Instagram?
Speaker 7: Uh huh.
Speaker 1: Anyway, so that's good advice, Brittany. You have been giving
Speaker 1: very good advice. Y.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm sorry I sound surprised. I're like, you're actually
Speaker 4: pretty competente. Confident and Confident two of my favorite series.
Speaker 1: Yes, so thank you for joining us today.
Speaker 4: I can't wait to see you again.
Speaker 3: Yeah. When you help me get on Riya and when
Speaker 3: I introduce you to my husband.
Speaker 1: Well, I'm not gonna have to see you to get
Speaker 1: you on Riah, but I like that's how you think
Speaker 1: it works and the zoom zoom. And that's our episode
Speaker 1: for today. Everybody, Thank you, we'll see you next week.
Speaker 7: Thanks team.
Speaker 2: If you'd like advice from Chelsea, shoot us an email
Speaker 2: at Dear Chelsea podcast at gmail dot com and be
Speaker 2: sure to include your phone number. Dear Chelsea is edited
Speaker 2: and engineered by Brad Dickard executive producer Catherine Law and
Speaker 2: be sure to check out our merch at Chelseahandler dot
Speaker 2: com