WEBVTT - "MY AUNT HIT ON ME" 0:00:00.520 --> 0:00:04.360 I ran it by my family, my whole family and 0:00:04.400 --> 0:00:07.080 my sister and my wife, and they all agree because 0:00:07.080 --> 0:00:11.400 she's just wild. She's he just wilds out and does 0:00:11.480 --> 0:00:15.160 these things, so it wouldn't surprise me. And she thought, man, 0:00:15.200 --> 0:00:18.480 I kind of want to fuck my nephew today. I'm 0:00:18.480 --> 0:00:21.919 a mess, Alex. 0:00:22.600 --> 0:00:25.200 Hello, Hey, Alex, how you doing? 0:00:26.880 --> 0:00:28.680 I am doing well? How you doing? 0:00:28.880 --> 0:00:32.720 Gek It says here you think your aunt might have 0:00:32.840 --> 0:00:34.000 sexted you today? 0:00:36.760 --> 0:00:40.959 Well, so it kind of gave off the feeling of it. 0:00:41.640 --> 0:00:46.640 So I guess some background. She's kind of uh, she's 0:00:46.760 --> 0:00:50.080 cheated on my uncle before, so you know she's kind 0:00:50.159 --> 0:00:55.360 she's kind of out there. And the text do you 0:00:55.360 --> 0:00:56.320 want to read the text? 0:00:57.160 --> 0:01:01.600 Sure, let's hear the text, all right. 0:01:03.600 --> 0:01:08.600 So she texts me and she says, hey, Alex, I 0:01:08.640 --> 0:01:13.600 got fired from my job today and I told insert 0:01:13.640 --> 0:01:17.160 my uncle's name, I feel like me and you should bond. 0:01:17.600 --> 0:01:20.200 All jokes aside, I'm a mess. 0:01:23.360 --> 0:01:24.120 That's the text. 0:01:25.920 --> 0:01:31.639 That's the text. And it just led me to believe 0:01:31.640 --> 0:01:35.000 the only time you would insert I'm a mess and 0:01:35.040 --> 0:01:37.720 we should bond is if you're trying to cop a feel. 0:01:38.360 --> 0:01:42.520 I'm gonna I'm gonna throw this out here immediately. Okay, 0:01:42.560 --> 0:01:49.160 I think I I I think I think something's going 0:01:49.200 --> 0:01:53.520 on with you that you're interpreting that text sexually. 0:01:55.880 --> 0:01:59.120 Interesting. We'll see here, we're not very close, that's the thing. 0:01:59.360 --> 0:02:02.480 I don't really speak to her, so we don't have 0:02:02.520 --> 0:02:05.200 some sort of relationship, right. 0:02:05.280 --> 0:02:11.240 But so here's my question, why would Okay, you and 0:02:11.280 --> 0:02:14.280 your aunt are not very close with each other, so 0:02:14.480 --> 0:02:18.359 it would make sense that she wants to hang out 0:02:18.400 --> 0:02:21.640 with you, bond with you, form a closer relationship with you, especially, 0:02:22.400 --> 0:02:26.079 you know, if if things aren't going well with her husband, 0:02:26.280 --> 0:02:31.120 only because she wants to have more time with her family. 0:02:32.040 --> 0:02:37.920 And I'm wondering why exactly you think there is a 0:02:38.000 --> 0:02:39.399 sexual connotation here. 0:02:44.760 --> 0:02:49.079 I think it just has more to do with the circumstances. 0:02:49.560 --> 0:02:54.720 I think if she sent this text, it just has 0:02:54.760 --> 0:02:57.560 to do with with I guess it's more of who 0:02:57.600 --> 0:03:00.440 she is. So the way I would take her, you 0:03:00.480 --> 0:03:06.240 know that the way her perception is, I don't know, 0:03:06.360 --> 0:03:08.160 I don't know. What do you think? What's your thoughts? 0:03:08.560 --> 0:03:11.919 Well, when you say you when you say that this 0:03:12.040 --> 0:03:17.000 interpretation that she is hitting on you comes from who 0:03:17.160 --> 0:03:20.959 she is? What is it about her that makes you 0:03:21.000 --> 0:03:22.919 think this is a sexual text. 0:03:25.080 --> 0:03:28.520 Because she's just wild. She's she just wilds out and 0:03:29.360 --> 0:03:34.520 does these things. She cheats, she's you know, she's kind 0:03:34.560 --> 0:03:38.000 of who she is. So it wouldn't surprise me if 0:03:38.040 --> 0:03:41.040 she thought, Man, I kind of want to fuck my 0:03:41.120 --> 0:03:42.480 nephew today. I'm a mess. 0:03:44.520 --> 0:03:47.960 So you think, I mean, granted, are you ran it 0:03:48.000 --> 0:03:48.520 by someone? 0:03:50.200 --> 0:03:54.000 I ran it by my family, my whole family, and 0:03:54.080 --> 0:03:57.920 my sister and my wife, and they all agree. My 0:03:57.960 --> 0:04:00.640 mom said she was drunk when she sent the So 0:04:02.360 --> 0:04:03.960 I think that adds more to the equation. 0:04:04.840 --> 0:04:07.320 Your mom and your wife, and who is the other person? 0:04:09.040 --> 0:04:11.760 My dad and my sister, Your mom, your wife. 0:04:11.600 --> 0:04:14.440 Your dad, and your sister, all of them unanimously think 0:04:15.520 --> 0:04:22.200 that you're all just trying to fuck you. Yes, really 0:04:23.279 --> 0:04:28.960 has she ever? Because I would say that. Look, cheating 0:04:29.080 --> 0:04:34.839 is one thing, but I feel like cheating and incest 0:04:35.880 --> 0:04:39.080 are not in the same category. I don't feel like 0:04:39.279 --> 0:04:43.880 somebody that would cheat is also somebody that would commit 0:04:43.960 --> 0:04:49.000 in sexual incestual sex acts. It's a tongue twister in 0:04:50.720 --> 0:04:54.080 had incestual sex acts. 0:04:55.880 --> 0:04:57.360 I think that was a that was a good one, 0:04:57.720 --> 0:05:00.840 thank you. But I think she has a thing with uh, 0:05:01.120 --> 0:05:04.880 just blurred lines. You know, she's not blood related. It's 0:05:04.960 --> 0:05:09.920 my mom's dad's wife. I mean my mom's brother's wife. 0:05:09.960 --> 0:05:10.440 Excuse me. 0:05:11.120 --> 0:05:15.560 Oh okay, all right, this makes a little slightly more plausible. 0:05:15.600 --> 0:05:20.560 So it's your uncles. You and your uncle are blood related, 0:05:20.560 --> 0:05:25.360 and this is your uncle's wife. Correct. Okay, all right, 0:05:25.440 --> 0:05:28.320 that's not as bad as if it was your blood 0:05:28.360 --> 0:05:28.480 on it. 0:05:30.560 --> 0:05:32.919 Oh yeah, yeah, that's that's yeah. I think if this 0:05:33.040 --> 0:05:37.440 is my blood related aunt, then I wouldn't have jumped 0:05:37.480 --> 0:05:40.560 straight to Oh, she's trying to cop a field. It's 0:05:40.640 --> 0:05:41.359 trying to diddle me. 0:05:42.000 --> 0:05:42.920 Okay, No, that's important. 0:05:43.160 --> 0:05:45.479 There's I guess there's a lot more into it, into 0:05:45.520 --> 0:05:46.039 the equation. 0:05:47.279 --> 0:05:48.880 Okay, what else fact is to the equation? 0:05:50.839 --> 0:05:54.560 Well, that's just it all that m hmm. 0:05:55.480 --> 0:05:59.520 Okay, So what's next here for you? Are you? Do 0:05:59.560 --> 0:06:01.000 you respond to this text? 0:06:02.160 --> 0:06:02.320 Well? 0:06:02.440 --> 0:06:05.200 See that's that. This was what was next. I said, Hey, 0:06:05.279 --> 0:06:09.080 maybe I should speak to a get go to decide 0:06:09.080 --> 0:06:12.000 what I do next. I did not respond. 0:06:13.240 --> 0:06:18.240 You didn't respond? Okay, well I did not. What would 0:06:18.279 --> 0:06:21.440 be an ideal outcome for you? Do you do you 0:06:21.640 --> 0:06:24.240 want to spend more time with your aunt? 0:06:28.760 --> 0:06:31.640 No? Not at this point. Not at this point. 0:06:32.040 --> 0:06:37.159 Mm hmmmm. I feel like it would make sense for 0:06:37.200 --> 0:06:38.440 you to leave the text alone. 0:06:38.480 --> 0:06:47.280 Then does leave it be no need to kind of 0:06:47.680 --> 0:06:51.320 go further with it or tell my uncle? Is that 0:06:51.400 --> 0:06:52.440 a thing? Should I do that? 0:06:53.120 --> 0:06:53.640 You think it was? 0:06:53.680 --> 0:06:54.720 Like, here's my thought. 0:06:54.760 --> 0:06:56.880 If it was, please tell me your thoughts. 0:06:58.400 --> 0:07:02.560 If it was a different situations, say your best friend's 0:07:02.640 --> 0:07:06.360 girlfriend was coming on to you kind of like that, Hey, 0:07:06.360 --> 0:07:09.920 i'm a mess, we should bond. I feel like you 0:07:09.960 --> 0:07:13.960 would tell your best friend. But when it's your aunt, 0:07:15.200 --> 0:07:19.040 you know, do you tell your uncle? That's different. That's 0:07:19.080 --> 0:07:19.960 a different ballgame. 0:07:20.640 --> 0:07:22.080 What's your relationship like with your uncle? 0:07:24.080 --> 0:07:24.840 You're pretty close. 0:07:28.840 --> 0:07:31.000 Listen, here's the thing. And I don't know your aunt, 0:07:32.400 --> 0:07:35.600 but I'm just I'm not sold that this is a 0:07:35.640 --> 0:07:38.000 sexual text. 0:07:41.280 --> 0:07:46.480 So you think there's a chance she was just drunk mess? 0:07:46.600 --> 0:07:49.040 I think so. I mean, I'm a copy of bond 0:07:49.040 --> 0:07:52.040 though I take things at face value. If your aunt 0:07:52.080 --> 0:07:54.160 says that she wants to bond with you more, but 0:07:54.200 --> 0:07:57.240 then you threw in the thing about how she's not 0:07:57.360 --> 0:08:01.800 your blood aunts, and that made the whole situation a 0:08:01.800 --> 0:08:08.360 little bit more plausible. But I would say that if 0:08:08.440 --> 0:08:10.480 you don't want to get involved with the situation. You 0:08:10.560 --> 0:08:12.600 might just want to leave the text alone. What does 0:08:12.600 --> 0:08:13.600 your wife think you should do? 0:08:16.760 --> 0:08:20.000 I don't know. I think she said leave the text alone. Hey, babe, 0:08:20.000 --> 0:08:23.720 what do you think I should do with the text? Nothing? 0:08:23.800 --> 0:08:24.560 She says nothing. 0:08:24.920 --> 0:08:26.680 Can I talk to her real quick just before we go? 0:08:27.960 --> 0:08:32.080 Yeah, you can absolutely speak to her Mischian. 0:08:33.600 --> 0:08:35.680 Hello, Hi, what's your name? 0:08:37.440 --> 0:08:37.800 Mary? 0:08:38.800 --> 0:08:40.760 Mary? Mary? I feel I think it would be nice 0:08:40.760 --> 0:08:44.560 to get your perspective on this. I personally don't think 0:08:44.559 --> 0:08:49.360 that this text is giving off vibes that Alex's aunt 0:08:49.360 --> 0:08:53.080 wants to have sex with him. But you you sound 0:08:53.160 --> 0:08:54.760 like you you think otherwise. 0:08:57.120 --> 0:08:59.960 Well, from what I can tell, me and my whole 0:09:00.160 --> 0:09:05.200 are recently married. So she's been married since October. And 0:09:05.400 --> 0:09:07.480 the first time I met her was at the wedding, 0:09:07.800 --> 0:09:12.640 and none of my husband's family really liked her, and 0:09:12.679 --> 0:09:15.240 everyone was kind of like stand offish about why they 0:09:15.320 --> 0:09:17.640 didn't like her. Some then, you know, I kind of 0:09:17.880 --> 0:09:20.400 started to cry a little bit more. And apparently she 0:09:20.440 --> 0:09:23.959 has a history of kind of just cheating and not 0:09:24.600 --> 0:09:29.679 being there for the right reasons. And it's hard to 0:09:29.840 --> 0:09:32.960 explain her personality because she's kind of shy, but it 0:09:33.000 --> 0:09:36.400 almost is like like she's trying to get something from 0:09:36.440 --> 0:09:40.440 you while trying to act polite. So I could definitely 0:09:40.520 --> 0:09:46.400 see why. It's like, why everyone thinks it she does 0:09:46.440 --> 0:09:48.160 not have good intentions. 0:09:47.640 --> 0:09:48.559 With the same. 0:09:51.160 --> 0:09:54.240 Or have you advised Alex to leave it alone rather 0:09:54.320 --> 0:09:57.360 than pursue this any further. 0:09:59.120 --> 0:10:01.600 Well, of course he just wants to find out what 0:10:01.640 --> 0:10:03.679 it is so he can kill his buddies or whatever. 0:10:04.000 --> 0:10:06.440 Like I really don't care if he does. 0:10:06.720 --> 0:10:11.000 But you think, okay, So you think do you think okay? 0:10:11.040 --> 0:10:13.559 So you just brought up a very interesting element. Do 0:10:13.640 --> 0:10:19.640 you think that he almost secretly wants to interpret this 0:10:19.760 --> 0:10:22.520 text as his aunt wanting to have sex with him 0:10:22.960 --> 0:10:24.720 so that he can use it as a flex? 0:10:27.160 --> 0:10:32.240 See I thought that at first. However, he didn't reach 0:10:32.240 --> 0:10:34.800 out to his friends first. He immediately went to his 0:10:35.000 --> 0:10:38.280 mom and dad because they don't like the girl and 0:10:39.480 --> 0:10:42.840 that makes me think otherwise. And then once everyone else agreed, 0:10:43.120 --> 0:10:46.080 he sent it to his friends group Chad and was like, hey, like, 0:10:46.240 --> 0:10:48.560 what do y'all think about this? And everyone's like yeah, 0:10:48.600 --> 0:10:52.680 Like I feel like she is not asking. 0:10:53.360 --> 0:10:55.319 He's kind of using it as a flex a little 0:10:55.320 --> 0:10:57.680 bit to be like, Hey, my aunt wants to have 0:10:57.720 --> 0:11:01.320 sex with because guys like I Because look, I feel like, 0:11:01.559 --> 0:11:06.000 you know, guys gain a lot of confidence just from 0:11:06.040 --> 0:11:11.960 like not even from like sleeping with women, but just 0:11:12.000 --> 0:11:14.600 from like a knowing that they would want to. And 0:11:14.679 --> 0:11:17.400 is there something like that going on with him? But 0:11:17.480 --> 0:11:19.800 with his aunt? 0:11:20.440 --> 0:11:21.160 It's possible. 0:11:21.240 --> 0:11:23.160 It's definitely possible. I mean I wouldn't. 0:11:23.640 --> 0:11:26.280 I wouldn't say it's out of question. 0:11:26.240 --> 0:11:29.920 But I mean I don't blame him. I mean, it's 0:11:29.960 --> 0:11:33.000 just guys to having fun. It's like harmless fun. Yes, 0:11:33.160 --> 0:11:36.840 if he kept bagging on with the aunt, then that'd 0:11:36.840 --> 0:11:40.160 be a concern. And like he's been keeping me updated 0:11:40.240 --> 0:11:41.959 with like all what his friends say, and like we've 0:11:42.000 --> 0:11:44.360 been laughing about it all day. So it's not I 0:11:44.400 --> 0:11:46.040 don't it's not bothering me. 0:11:46.040 --> 0:11:46.760 In any way. 0:11:46.840 --> 0:11:50.160 But I mean, yes, I do. I do think he 0:11:50.280 --> 0:11:52.840 is trying to impress it from in some sort. 0:11:53.559 --> 0:11:55.800 Well, thank you very much for sharing. Mary. Can I 0:11:56.120 --> 0:11:57.520 talk to Alex and we'll wrap it up? 0:11:59.040 --> 0:12:00.000 You can. 0:12:05.800 --> 0:12:07.400 Hello, gig Hey, Alex. 0:12:07.440 --> 0:12:07.839 How you doing. 0:12:09.880 --> 0:12:11.280 I'm well, man, I'm well. 0:12:11.960 --> 0:12:13.920 Listen Alex. Before we go, I want to I want 0:12:13.960 --> 0:12:15.840 to bring up this sort of theory that Mary and 0:12:15.880 --> 0:12:23.000 I are talking about here secretly, secretly. Do you consider 0:12:23.040 --> 0:12:24.720 it a flex that your aunt wants to have sex 0:12:24.760 --> 0:12:25.000 with you? 0:12:27.240 --> 0:12:27.480 Yes? 0:12:28.640 --> 0:12:39.440 Yes, Hey, thank you for calling, Alex, appreciate you sharing 0:12:39.440 --> 0:12:40.080 a story with us. 0:12:41.880 --> 0:12:43.240 Thank you, Greg, you have a great night. 0:12:46.720 --> 0:12:51.360 People take what they can get in this world. Anything, 0:12:51.440 --> 0:12:59.079 anything to make them feel like they're wanted, they're attractive, 0:13:01.400 --> 0:13:05.360 People will take it. That's the world we live in, 0:13:06.280 --> 0:13:10.840 That's how our brains work. So I felt no one 0:13:10.920 --> 0:13:11.360 for nothing. 0:13:15.080 --> 0:13:18.920 Hello, Hello, Hi? 0:13:19.240 --> 0:13:22.600 Is this I'm gonna fuck up pronouncing your name? But 0:13:23.160 --> 0:13:25.320 can I try? Can I try? And you can tell 0:13:25.360 --> 0:13:26.559 me if I did it right? 0:13:28.480 --> 0:13:28.880 Safe? 0:13:29.559 --> 0:13:30.240 Is it safe? 0:13:30.720 --> 0:13:31.080 Yes? 0:13:32.640 --> 0:13:37.839 I'm a genius. How do people because how do people 0:13:37.840 --> 0:13:39.760 normally pronounce it? Because I have people probably fuck it 0:13:39.840 --> 0:13:42.000 up a lot. What are the most common fuck ups 0:13:42.000 --> 0:13:42.480 of that name? 0:13:44.240 --> 0:13:47.200 Oh? My god, I get so many. I get Paige, 0:13:47.640 --> 0:13:50.560 I get face like like your face. 0:13:52.800 --> 0:13:58.760 How do people How do people get Paige from Safe? 0:13:59.040 --> 0:14:01.600 I really don't know. Oh, honestly, I guess because they 0:14:01.679 --> 0:14:05.360 sound similar. I never understood it, though, but I've been 0:14:05.400 --> 0:14:06.520 getting it my whole life. 0:14:07.120 --> 0:14:08.640 Well, listen, page, what's going on with you? 0:14:10.760 --> 0:14:16.679 Nothing much? And just watching your stream. 0:14:16.760 --> 0:14:19.840 Well, listen, it says here you told a person this. 0:14:20.600 --> 0:14:23.000 You called the phone number, a person asked you what 0:14:23.080 --> 0:14:25.200 you wanted to talk about, and you told them that 0:14:25.280 --> 0:14:29.360 you get nightmares every You've been having nightmares every single 0:14:29.440 --> 0:14:32.480 night for your entire life. Is this correct? 0:14:32.720 --> 0:14:32.880 Yes? 0:14:33.760 --> 0:14:34.560 What is that? 0:14:34.720 --> 0:14:34.880 Like? 0:14:36.600 --> 0:14:44.200 Oh, it's horrible. It's been going on since my whole life, 0:14:44.280 --> 0:14:47.200 like literally since I was a child, since like I 0:14:47.240 --> 0:14:52.040 was four years old. And they're like really intense and 0:14:52.120 --> 0:14:52.880 like gruesome. 0:14:57.480 --> 0:15:00.680 They've been happening every single night without fits as you're 0:15:00.720 --> 0:15:03.040 twenty years old. They started when you were four years old? 0:15:03.080 --> 0:15:06.400 And has it been sixteen years? Every single night of 0:15:06.440 --> 0:15:07.640 these nightmares. 0:15:09.320 --> 0:15:10.680 Every single night. 0:15:11.160 --> 0:15:12.080 Every single night? 0:15:13.600 --> 0:15:14.920 Yeah? 0:15:14.960 --> 0:15:18.920 And is it the same nightmare or are we talking 0:15:19.040 --> 0:15:20.000 different nightmares? 0:15:22.800 --> 0:15:26.080 So some of them are the same, Like I've had 0:15:26.080 --> 0:15:28.920 some since I was a child, and they'll be like 0:15:29.080 --> 0:15:34.560 exactly the same from years ago. But sometimes they're just 0:15:34.680 --> 0:15:40.720 brand new ones. Sometimes they're similar situations, you know, So 0:15:40.880 --> 0:15:42.320 it's really weird. 0:15:44.240 --> 0:15:48.480 Tell me about the most reoccurring one that you've had 0:15:48.520 --> 0:15:49.880 throughout the past sixteen years. 0:15:51.760 --> 0:15:57.720 Okay, So I am in this like weird mall, and 0:15:58.360 --> 0:16:02.800 there's like like an alarm going off, like flashing lights, 0:16:02.840 --> 0:16:05.080 and people are like running to get out of the mall, 0:16:05.880 --> 0:16:09.800 and I am just like wandering around. I'm like seeing 0:16:09.880 --> 0:16:11.720 all the stores and stuff like that, and it's like 0:16:11.760 --> 0:16:14.960 a it's like a normal mall, but like you could 0:16:15.040 --> 0:16:20.160 tell that it's off. And so I'm walking around and 0:16:21.240 --> 0:16:25.800 I get to the well. There's some other stuff that happens, 0:16:25.800 --> 0:16:30.640 but basically I get to the roof and it turns 0:16:30.640 --> 0:16:35.680 out it was a zombie apocalypse and the zombies are 0:16:35.720 --> 0:16:38.880 coming through the door. I'm on the ledge of the 0:16:38.960 --> 0:16:43.760 roof and all my friends and family are down below, 0:16:43.960 --> 0:16:46.120 like on the floor, and they're telling me that the 0:16:46.120 --> 0:16:49.600 only way to stop the zombie apocalypse apocalypse is if 0:16:49.640 --> 0:16:54.160 I jump off, and then I ends up jumping and 0:16:54.320 --> 0:16:56.200 waking up right before I hit the ground. 0:16:57.400 --> 0:17:01.200 Interesting. Okay, so you're dangling on off of or you're 0:17:01.280 --> 0:17:04.040 dangling or you like you're you're like standing by the 0:17:04.119 --> 0:17:04.879 edge of this roof. 0:17:06.400 --> 0:17:07.639 I'm standing by the edge. 0:17:07.880 --> 0:17:10.000 You're standing by the edge behind you as a horde 0:17:10.000 --> 0:17:12.520 of zombies below you, as all your friends and family 0:17:12.960 --> 0:17:15.400 telling you to jump off the building and kill yourself. 0:17:17.240 --> 0:17:17.560 Yeah. 0:17:18.840 --> 0:17:22.320 Interesting, So how does that feel like watching all your 0:17:22.359 --> 0:17:24.639 friends and family tell you to jump off a building 0:17:24.640 --> 0:17:25.520 and kill yourself. 0:17:28.359 --> 0:17:33.800 It's it used to be like really like like impactful 0:17:33.840 --> 0:17:35.679 to me. Like I used to like wake up and 0:17:35.720 --> 0:17:38.199 think about it like all day when I would get 0:17:38.240 --> 0:17:42.480 the nightmare. But now since it's like kind of happened 0:17:42.520 --> 0:17:45.120 so much, I'm just kind of, like I want to say, 0:17:45.160 --> 0:17:45.960 like numb to it. 0:17:49.200 --> 0:17:52.840 Oh, I have so many questions. Uh so, Oh my god, 0:17:52.880 --> 0:17:57.840 I just forgot all of them. So how often does 0:17:58.000 --> 0:18:00.840 this particular nightmare take place? 0:18:03.880 --> 0:18:07.920 Probably maybe twice a month? 0:18:08.880 --> 0:18:12.919 Twice a month, Okay, And so you say you become 0:18:13.000 --> 0:18:18.320 numb to this? Does there become a point, like, you know, 0:18:18.480 --> 0:18:20.560 you know what lucid dreaming is, right where you know 0:18:20.640 --> 0:18:25.840 that you're in a dream. Yeah, every time, Now that 0:18:25.880 --> 0:18:28.359 you've had this dream so many times, has it become 0:18:28.520 --> 0:18:32.800 easy for you to recognize when you're in the dream, 0:18:33.080 --> 0:18:39.159 therefore giving you more control over it or you know, 0:18:39.480 --> 0:18:43.919 allowing you to freak out about it less. 0:18:44.320 --> 0:18:49.000 Yeah. So, as as I've gotten older, I actually like 0:18:49.640 --> 0:18:53.600 I have more lucid dreams now, So I like realize 0:18:53.600 --> 0:18:55.600 that I'm in a nightmare and I try to wake 0:18:55.720 --> 0:19:00.800 myself up like in the dream like I'll inch my arm. 0:19:01.000 --> 0:19:05.520 That's what I do in the dream, and it usually 0:19:06.000 --> 0:19:08.960 doesn't work to wake me up, but at least, like 0:19:09.080 --> 0:19:11.600 I know that, like I'm in a dream and I'm safe, 0:19:11.640 --> 0:19:13.679 and I just have to like if it's like a 0:19:13.720 --> 0:19:16.760 reoccurring dream, I just have to go through what's happening 0:19:16.760 --> 0:19:18.280 in the dream so that I can wake up. 0:19:20.000 --> 0:19:23.360 Okay, so it becomes like clockwork, You're like, oh, I'm 0:19:23.359 --> 0:19:25.200 back in the dream. All I gotta do is jump 0:19:25.280 --> 0:19:27.480 off of this building and kill myself and then I'm. 0:19:27.359 --> 0:19:30.879 Fine, yep, exactly. 0:19:32.200 --> 0:19:34.240 But then, okay, So if you're in the dream and 0:19:34.280 --> 0:19:35.800 you know it's a dream and you know you're safe 0:19:35.840 --> 0:19:37.720 and nothing back can happen to you, do you never 0:19:37.920 --> 0:19:42.879 like try to make some alternate choices like go back 0:19:42.920 --> 0:19:45.320 and start punching the zombies in the face, or like 0:19:46.520 --> 0:19:50.920 you know, run around, or like you know, try to 0:19:50.920 --> 0:19:54.520 start like maybe inching your way down the building or 0:19:54.560 --> 0:19:57.520 like using a find a ladder or something like. Do 0:19:57.520 --> 0:19:59.879 you never make like alternate choices now that you know 0:20:00.080 --> 0:20:03.480 that none of them will will that they all end 0:20:03.600 --> 0:20:04.560 with you waking up. 0:20:07.680 --> 0:20:11.800 So I I've tried, like in the dream, like to 0:20:11.880 --> 0:20:15.119 make like different choices, but it's always the same ending, 0:20:15.359 --> 0:20:17.920 like it always ends up. I guess with this one, 0:20:17.960 --> 0:20:22.840 it always ends up with me jumping off, like no 0:20:22.840 --> 0:20:24.800 matter what I do, like even if I try to, 0:20:24.920 --> 0:20:27.399 Like I don't know, there was one time where I 0:20:27.520 --> 0:20:34.080 tried talking to my family and friends from the room. 0:20:32.880 --> 0:20:38.880 They were like it was they were like hollow husks 0:20:38.920 --> 0:20:43.040 of themselves, like they had no personality, and they just 0:20:43.119 --> 0:20:45.600 kept on saying like the same things over and over, 0:20:45.720 --> 0:20:48.119 like the only way to save everyone is if you jump, 0:20:49.080 --> 0:20:52.919 like there's no way to get out of this, like 0:20:53.080 --> 0:20:55.159 just a lot of stuff like that. But they wouldn't 0:20:55.200 --> 0:20:58.119 say anything else like that, and like they I remember, 0:20:58.240 --> 0:21:02.480 they were like pale, like they were pale versions of 0:21:02.520 --> 0:21:05.679 themselves with like like just blank eyes. 0:21:07.640 --> 0:21:11.199 So this nightmare you say is twice a month, So 0:21:13.000 --> 0:21:16.480 how often is it a is it a fresh nightmare? 0:21:16.560 --> 0:21:19.440 Because this one it sounds like, Okay, I've been through 0:21:19.480 --> 0:21:21.520 the motions. All I gotta do is jump off the building, 0:21:21.640 --> 0:21:25.840 kill myself. I'm good. But how often are you having 0:21:25.880 --> 0:21:30.160 to deal with nightmares that are new to you? 0:21:33.440 --> 0:21:37.920 Pretty much every other night? I only just get this one. 0:21:38.040 --> 0:21:39.919 I don't know why I get this one. A lot, 0:21:40.720 --> 0:21:46.639 but like other like repetitive dreams that I have, Like 0:21:46.960 --> 0:21:50.960 I'll maybe get them once every couple of months, so 0:21:51.119 --> 0:21:53.600 like really every other night is kind of like a 0:21:53.680 --> 0:21:55.400 new dream. 0:21:55.440 --> 0:21:59.399 Interesting. I almost feel like, uh, and tell me if 0:21:59.440 --> 0:22:01.879 I have the wrong here, But is there is there 0:22:01.920 --> 0:22:05.960 anything exciting about that? You're like, oh, it's like you're 0:22:05.960 --> 0:22:09.840 opening up a new horror each night. But it's kind 0:22:09.880 --> 0:22:13.000 of yeah. I mean, you know, they're the exploration of 0:22:13.080 --> 0:22:16.720 horror is a medium of entertainment, is a very real thing. 0:22:16.840 --> 0:22:18.600 Do you ever look at it like that? Or am 0:22:18.640 --> 0:22:20.320 I completely off? 0:22:22.840 --> 0:22:26.640 No? I you're totally right, because like I also do 0:22:26.800 --> 0:22:32.560 like free writing in my free time, so like I 0:22:32.640 --> 0:22:35.680 will write, like I think it's like kind of interesting 0:22:35.720 --> 0:22:38.520 because it's like, oh, I'm getting new inspiration every night. 0:22:39.040 --> 0:22:41.040 That's how I kind of have put a spin on it. 0:22:40.960 --> 0:22:42.159 Now, totally totally. 0:22:43.760 --> 0:22:45.760 Yeah. 0:22:45.800 --> 0:22:49.680 So you will take these dreams and you'll transmute them into. 0:22:49.520 --> 0:22:54.520 Your writing, Yeah, exactly, Like I'll try to write like 0:22:55.520 --> 0:22:59.240 even just like a short story about them. Yeah, just 0:22:59.280 --> 0:23:02.560 like whatever happens in it, just try to get it 0:23:02.600 --> 0:23:05.160 down because it's kind of like journaling and it's kind 0:23:05.160 --> 0:23:08.800 of like like I like writing, so it's like a 0:23:08.800 --> 0:23:11.920 little therapeutic read. 0:23:13.400 --> 0:23:17.840 Oh go ahead, No, it's okay. I was gonna say 0:23:17.840 --> 0:23:26.560 I would totally read a book called The Safe Nightmare Journal. Yeah, 0:23:26.840 --> 0:23:28.160 have you ever thought about that? You ever thought about 0:23:28.160 --> 0:23:29.399 publishing a nightmare journal? 0:23:32.040 --> 0:23:37.400 Actually? Yeah, I kind of have been thinking about, like, 0:23:37.400 --> 0:23:40.439 like you know, writing like a full on book about it, 0:23:40.480 --> 0:23:43.000 because I don't really know anyone else who kind of 0:23:43.040 --> 0:23:46.880 gets this, and I do think that it's like kind 0:23:46.880 --> 0:23:50.919 of interesting. I mean, I'm sure there's like people like 0:23:51.000 --> 0:23:53.800 other people, but like personally, I don't know anyone else 0:23:53.840 --> 0:23:55.840 who gets this, and everyone that I tell it to, 0:23:56.200 --> 0:23:59.880 they're like, you know, like that's really interesting. Obviously it's 0:24:00.480 --> 0:24:05.399 but like like it's really interesting because there's no like 0:24:05.600 --> 0:24:07.240 real reason why I get it. 0:24:09.160 --> 0:24:10.520 What was your dream last night? 0:24:12.960 --> 0:24:20.359 Okay, So it's it was a little much, but I 0:24:20.400 --> 0:24:23.119 can't remember how it started. All I remember was like 0:24:23.160 --> 0:24:27.399 the disturbing part that I was on a beach and 0:24:27.680 --> 0:24:30.520 I looked down at my foot and my foot like 0:24:31.080 --> 0:24:34.119 really hurt and it was like really like it felt 0:24:34.119 --> 0:24:37.679 really raw. So then I take off my flip flop 0:24:38.119 --> 0:24:44.000 and then it looked like a like a rotting fish. Corpse, 0:24:45.560 --> 0:24:48.800 like just ripped open with like bones sticking out of it, 0:24:48.920 --> 0:24:52.400 and like like just like what like a raw cut 0:24:52.400 --> 0:24:53.680 open fish would look. 0:24:53.520 --> 0:25:02.640 Like your foot looks like that? Yeah, And how did 0:25:02.720 --> 0:25:06.480 you react to that? Are you not at a point 0:25:06.480 --> 0:25:09.199 I mean, after sixteen years, are you not at a 0:25:09.240 --> 0:25:14.040 point where you see you're rotting fish foot and you're like, ah, 0:25:14.640 --> 0:25:17.800 this is nothing to me? What else you got? Brain? 0:25:18.440 --> 0:25:20.480 Come on, it's been sixteen years of this. You can't 0:25:20.480 --> 0:25:24.240 scare me with anything? Or is it still each night, 0:25:25.760 --> 0:25:28.240 you know, a fresh hit to you? 0:25:31.119 --> 0:25:36.280 It still like it still feels like scary, and I 0:25:36.320 --> 0:25:39.120 still get like nervous and like I have a lot 0:25:39.119 --> 0:25:42.880 of anxiety about it, even though that I know that, 0:25:43.000 --> 0:25:45.840 like I know none of it's real and I know 0:25:45.960 --> 0:25:50.639 that it's just my brain doing this to myself, But 0:25:51.200 --> 0:25:54.439 like I still get that like kind of fear, you know, 0:25:55.200 --> 0:26:00.439 like almost like that primal fear, because like I'm like 0:26:00.520 --> 0:26:03.800 when you're asleep, you're like you're most vulnerable, and so 0:26:03.840 --> 0:26:07.240 it's like if that's happening in my head, like what's 0:26:07.240 --> 0:26:08.520 happening outside you know? 0:26:09.440 --> 0:26:11.880 M And. 0:26:13.840 --> 0:26:17.280 That that primal fear, you know, like we were talking 0:26:17.280 --> 0:26:19.720 about earlier, everyone there's a lot of people out there 0:26:19.720 --> 0:26:23.280 who chase that with like horror movies and haunted houses 0:26:23.440 --> 0:26:27.560 and whatnot. And and how successful have you been in 0:26:28.840 --> 0:26:34.240 sort of reframing your attitude toward finding a thrill from 0:26:34.280 --> 0:26:35.800 these dreams. 0:26:38.040 --> 0:26:41.679 Well, I'm not someone I like get very scared of 0:26:41.720 --> 0:26:46.639 like horror movies and like scary things for you, like 0:26:46.720 --> 0:26:52.880 I just always have. Yeah, it's just not for me. Like, yeah, 0:26:52.920 --> 0:26:53.880 I just don't like it. 0:26:55.480 --> 0:26:57.320 So the final thing I kind of want to explore 0:26:57.359 --> 0:27:01.800 with this is have you what have your efforts looked, like, 0:27:01.920 --> 0:27:05.520 if any, to cure yourself of this. Have you ever 0:27:05.600 --> 0:27:13.439 gone to a like dream therapist or some sort of 0:27:13.600 --> 0:27:16.560 mind doctor or something to find out why this is 0:27:16.600 --> 0:27:17.159 happening to you? 0:27:19.680 --> 0:27:23.240 Yeah, I've been to Like I've been to a couple therapists. 0:27:23.880 --> 0:27:29.560 I'm on like some medications for it, but really like 0:27:31.119 --> 0:27:35.320 they no one knows what to do about it. They 0:27:35.560 --> 0:27:38.479 don't know like how to help. I try, Like I 0:27:38.520 --> 0:27:41.520 try taking melotonin, I try, you know, doing a bunch 0:27:41.520 --> 0:27:45.920 of stuff to try to like get myself to stay asleep, 0:27:46.080 --> 0:27:48.159 and like maybe like if I put myself in a 0:27:48.200 --> 0:27:51.960 deeper sleep, maybe like I won't experience the nightmare, but 0:27:53.160 --> 0:27:57.879 nothing has helped. So I'm kind of thinking about maybe 0:27:57.920 --> 0:28:01.800 doing a sleep study and and like trying to find 0:28:02.480 --> 0:28:06.520 someone else who can, like maybe like a sleep specialist. 0:28:06.680 --> 0:28:08.320 I don't know if they have those there. 0:28:08.800 --> 0:28:11.560 No, I'm sure they do. Somebody who can like hook 0:28:11.600 --> 0:28:15.399 you up to some some wires or sprain scanners or 0:28:15.440 --> 0:28:20.280 something and like look at the neuro patterns while you're 0:28:20.320 --> 0:28:21.680 while you're asleep. 0:28:23.920 --> 0:28:27.359 Exactly like just like see like, oh, maybe my body 0:28:27.480 --> 0:28:30.119 is like reacting to it. I don't know how I'm sleeping, Like, 0:28:30.160 --> 0:28:32.120 I'm sure I know it is, because like I wake 0:28:32.240 --> 0:28:36.399 up in like a pool of sweat, so like I 0:28:36.480 --> 0:28:40.719 know that my body is like experiencing the fear like physically. 0:28:42.720 --> 0:28:44.800 So I'm sure that like if I did a sleep study, 0:28:44.800 --> 0:28:47.760 they'd be able to like see like when my brain 0:28:48.680 --> 0:28:49.640 peaks or whatever. 0:28:50.760 --> 0:28:56.040 Do you think that there are anything? Do you do 0:28:56.040 --> 0:29:00.000 you believe that dreams tell us things about our subconscious 0:29:00.000 --> 0:29:04.680 just like like this recurring dream of you having to 0:29:04.760 --> 0:29:07.800 jump off a building because your family is yelling at 0:29:07.840 --> 0:29:11.480 you and there's a zombie apocalypse and this rotting foot thing, 0:29:11.720 --> 0:29:16.880 Like do you think that these are completely random firings 0:29:16.960 --> 0:29:21.280 of neurons or are they trying to tell you something 0:29:21.400 --> 0:29:24.880 about what you subconsciously think and feel. 0:29:27.440 --> 0:29:30.640 I think some of them are like deep and like 0:29:30.800 --> 0:29:33.360 I think some of them kind of are like a 0:29:33.920 --> 0:29:37.239 window into my subconscious But I think like some of 0:29:37.280 --> 0:29:39.760 them like looking down at my foot and seeing like 0:29:39.800 --> 0:29:43.520 a dead fish corpse, Like I can't really get any 0:29:43.560 --> 0:29:49.280 sort of like anything from that. I don't think there's 0:29:49.320 --> 0:29:50.280 anything really from that. 0:29:50.440 --> 0:29:51.800 I would be trying to tell you either. 0:29:53.560 --> 0:29:57.040 Yeah, I guess like some of like the more like 0:29:57.560 --> 0:30:00.840 intricate and intense ones probably have like something to do 0:30:00.920 --> 0:30:04.160 with like my personality and my brain and what's going 0:30:04.200 --> 0:30:07.040 on in my head. And but I'm I'm sure a 0:30:07.080 --> 0:30:10.200 lot of them are probably just like what, what's a 0:30:10.240 --> 0:30:12.440 new thing that we could throw at her tonight? You know? 0:30:15.400 --> 0:30:18.800 And I mean it sounds like you're getting better and 0:30:18.840 --> 0:30:22.320 better at dealing with this, I mean every single night. 0:30:22.360 --> 0:30:24.640 I mean that sounds sounds pretty exhausting. 0:30:27.080 --> 0:30:31.600 Yeah, I've definitely gotten a lot better with it. Like 0:30:31.680 --> 0:30:36.160 I know kind of well, I know like how to 0:30:36.320 --> 0:30:38.960 like act in like a lucid dream. I kind of know, 0:30:39.280 --> 0:30:43.840 like like if I sleep within like a certain setting, 0:30:44.000 --> 0:30:46.240 you know, like in a cool room or something like that. 0:30:46.440 --> 0:30:50.840 Then like, I kind of not that it's like better, 0:30:51.200 --> 0:30:55.920 but it kind of is less intense than some other ones. 0:30:56.440 --> 0:30:59.000 Like so I kind of I know some coping skills 0:30:59.000 --> 0:31:04.280 to deal with it, but of course they're only like temporary, 0:31:04.560 --> 0:31:04.760 you know. 0:31:06.120 --> 0:31:08.920 Well, Safe, thank you for sharing this, Thank you for 0:31:08.960 --> 0:31:11.080 sharing this with us. This was super super interesting. Is 0:31:11.080 --> 0:31:13.120 there anything else that you want to say to the 0:31:13.160 --> 0:31:14.640 people before we before we go? 0:31:19.320 --> 0:31:25.440 I think, everyone go buy little plush gnomes I have. 0:31:25.760 --> 0:31:29.840 We have so many in my house and they're adorable 0:31:30.040 --> 0:31:33.080 and they make me very happy. So everyone should go 0:31:33.360 --> 0:31:34.960 buy plush gnomes. 0:31:35.360 --> 0:31:37.960 I like. I like that. It's a very specific thing 0:31:39.000 --> 0:31:41.240 that I because everyone you know, a lot of people 0:31:41.240 --> 0:31:42.640 when I ask them or do you have anything else 0:31:42.640 --> 0:31:45.000 to say, they go, everyone have a good day. It's like, well, 0:31:45.760 --> 0:31:48.600 that's not something I can't do. That that's not something 0:31:48.640 --> 0:31:51.080 I can It's not really actionable, but I thank you 0:31:51.080 --> 0:31:54.719 for providing an actionable thing for the people listening. And 0:31:54.880 --> 0:31:58.400 please write the Safe Dream Journal. That is a cool 0:31:58.560 --> 0:32:02.760 name for a book and I would absolutely read it. 0:32:04.160 --> 0:32:05.360 I'll dedicate it to you. 0:32:05.400 --> 0:32:08.720 Gek beautiful, Thank you, saf have a good night, or 0:32:08.840 --> 0:32:16.600 you know, try to. I will bye the Safe Dream Journal. 0:32:19.040 --> 0:32:21.320 One of these days, I'm going to be browsing Amazon 0:32:21.360 --> 0:32:25.240 and I'm going to see that pop up, and uh, 0:32:26.000 --> 0:32:29.280 hopefully there'll be a little you know, how they know 0:32:29.320 --> 0:32:31.840 how they have? They call at one singular page of 0:32:31.880 --> 0:32:38.280 a dedication dedicated to the gecko guy on the computer. 0:32:38.520 --> 0:32:43.440 I forgot what his name was, but I would definitely 0:32:43.440 --> 0:32:50.120 read that book. Sasha, Hi, how are you? 0:32:52.320 --> 0:32:53.080 I'm pretty good? 0:32:53.080 --> 0:32:55.920 How about you? I'm a gecko on the computer. 0:32:59.080 --> 0:32:59.800 Sounds about right. 0:33:02.080 --> 0:33:05.120 Uh, what's going on? 0:33:07.640 --> 0:33:13.440 Not much chilling hanging out playing computer games? Watching your stream, Sasha. 0:33:13.480 --> 0:33:14.920 It says here you want to know if you should 0:33:14.920 --> 0:33:16.920 be ashamed that you had to ship in a litter 0:33:16.960 --> 0:33:17.560 box once. 0:33:20.360 --> 0:33:22.960 Yeah, And I don't know that I think about it. 0:33:23.000 --> 0:33:24.760 I don't know if it's so much that I should 0:33:24.880 --> 0:33:28.240 feel shame about it. I think my fiance's problem is 0:33:28.280 --> 0:33:31.240 more that I'm seeing proud of it. 0:33:33.840 --> 0:33:35.920 Okay, this is a whole different call than I thought 0:33:35.960 --> 0:33:38.200 it was. You were asking if you should be ashamed, 0:33:38.920 --> 0:33:41.280 But I feel like the question is not should you 0:33:41.320 --> 0:33:45.920 be ashamed? It's you're not ashamed of shitting in the 0:33:45.960 --> 0:33:51.080 litter box. You sound like your battle. Well, okay, well, 0:33:51.600 --> 0:33:56.680 you sound like your questioning if you should be ashamed 0:33:57.360 --> 0:34:00.920 for being proud that you sit in the litter box. 0:34:02.760 --> 0:34:06.200 That's that's actually perfect. That would be the exact way 0:34:06.240 --> 0:34:10.240 that I would explain this situation. I'm not ashamed. I'm 0:34:10.400 --> 0:34:12.799 I mean, like I said, I was born of necessity. 0:34:13.120 --> 0:34:16.240 But I feel like that's wrong and maybe I should 0:34:16.239 --> 0:34:16.840 be ashamed. 0:34:16.920 --> 0:34:17.120 Where. 0:34:17.200 --> 0:34:19.520 Okay, well here, let's let's let's take us one other 0:34:19.560 --> 0:34:24.600 time here. Why are you proud of shitting in the 0:34:24.640 --> 0:34:25.200 litter box? 0:34:28.520 --> 0:34:32.719 I guess it was. I'm an inventive person, and I 0:34:32.880 --> 0:34:35.880 really did make lemonade out of lemons in like a 0:34:35.960 --> 0:34:37.840 really shitty situation. 0:34:38.880 --> 0:34:44.000 Mm hmmm hmm. Okay, go ahead, tell us you say 0:34:44.040 --> 0:34:46.440 it's out of necessity. What was the situation? 0:34:49.520 --> 0:34:51.640 I lived up in the mountains with a bunch of 0:34:51.640 --> 0:34:54.760 people and a bunch of broken down trailers in Winnebagos. 0:34:55.960 --> 0:34:58.919 One of our friends had cooked for the night, and 0:34:59.239 --> 0:35:04.040 they cooked chicken, but I guess they didn't cook it 0:35:04.080 --> 0:35:07.120 all the way. And I've up until that point, I 0:35:07.160 --> 0:35:12.360 had never had food poisoning from eating raw chicken, but 0:35:12.480 --> 0:35:16.480 I obviously it struck me that night I was sharing 0:35:16.520 --> 0:35:20.520 a Winnebago at the time with my ex boyfriend who 0:35:20.520 --> 0:35:23.840 I had just broken up with, and his cat was 0:35:23.880 --> 0:35:26.440 living with us. So it was the three of us 0:35:26.520 --> 0:35:29.440 and w a beego that didn't move that had a 0:35:29.480 --> 0:35:32.800 bathroom in it, but the toilet and the shower were broken. 0:35:33.000 --> 0:35:36.960 So it was like maybe two or three o'clock in 0:35:36.960 --> 0:35:40.919 the morning when the motion started to hit me. And 0:35:41.000 --> 0:35:47.440 so there was one working toilet on the property, but 0:35:47.560 --> 0:35:49.680 it was like at least a quarter to a half 0:35:49.760 --> 0:35:55.920 mile walk uphill to get to the working toilet, and 0:35:56.080 --> 0:35:58.239 I just there was no time there. It wasn't going 0:35:58.320 --> 0:36:04.360 to happen. So I and the litter box. Didn't I 0:36:04.400 --> 0:36:07.160 say litter box lightly, There was no litter in it, 0:36:07.200 --> 0:36:08.080 there was dirt in it. 0:36:09.800 --> 0:36:12.880 So I grabbed the litter. 0:36:12.680 --> 0:36:15.759 Box, put it on top of the toilet in the Winnebago, 0:36:16.400 --> 0:36:20.319 and I had to ship in the litter box. I 0:36:20.360 --> 0:36:22.560 also had to turn around and throw up in the 0:36:22.600 --> 0:36:28.480 same litter box. I mean, it wasn't graceful, but it 0:36:28.560 --> 0:36:32.000 was better than using the broken one inside the Winnebago. 0:36:32.680 --> 0:36:34.400 I mean, they could have gone outside. 0:36:36.960 --> 0:36:40.399 I agree with the with the the sort of first 0:36:40.440 --> 0:36:45.200 sentiment that that you echoed here, which is that you 0:36:45.280 --> 0:36:51.280 are proud of yourself for your ingenuity, for your ability 0:36:51.280 --> 0:36:54.800 to be a problem solver. And I agree with you, Sasha. Sasha, 0:36:55.120 --> 0:36:57.440 when you had to take a ship, when you had 0:36:57.480 --> 0:37:00.600 to throw up, you did not complain that the toilet 0:37:01.160 --> 0:37:02.879 wasn't working in the Winnebago. Is that what you said? 0:37:02.920 --> 0:37:07.239 The toilet wasn't working in the Winnebago. Yeah, the toy. 0:37:07.320 --> 0:37:09.920 You did not complain the toilet wasn't working in the Winnebago. 0:37:11.120 --> 0:37:18.439 You did not freak out, You kept calm, You had 0:37:18.480 --> 0:37:24.720 a You searched not for further complaints, which you knew 0:37:25.480 --> 0:37:31.440 would result in nothing, but rather you there was wasted 0:37:31.520 --> 0:37:37.120 time in your solution oriented person. And my god, Sasha, 0:37:37.560 --> 0:37:40.960 I think you should be proud of that. I think 0:37:41.000 --> 0:37:43.160 you should be proud of that. I don't think that 0:37:43.320 --> 0:37:48.799 there's any shame in the pride that you have for 0:37:49.200 --> 0:37:55.200 your own problem solving initiatives. That's just my perspective, but. 0:37:57.040 --> 0:38:00.960 That's mine too. But my fiance, I just I guess 0:38:01.040 --> 0:38:03.640 you think that I shouldn't talk as much about it 0:38:03.680 --> 0:38:04.400 to people. 0:38:06.120 --> 0:38:14.080 Listen, Dude, I think I think that your fiance, for 0:38:14.160 --> 0:38:21.840 whatever reason, just doesn't appreciate this aspect of you. That's fair, 0:38:24.520 --> 0:38:27.879 But I think you should, you know, because it's a 0:38:27.960 --> 0:38:31.200 it's a great quality to have it a person being 0:38:31.239 --> 0:38:32.320 solution oriented. 0:38:32.520 --> 0:38:37.200 Yeah, I don't think it's that I'm a solution oriented. 0:38:37.280 --> 0:38:38.879 I think it's that I tell a lot of pop 0:38:39.000 --> 0:38:41.520 stories openly to people that are like just They don't 0:38:41.520 --> 0:38:43.680 even have to be like close family. I could be 0:38:43.760 --> 0:38:46.799 like coworkers or people that I'm chatting with, and I 0:38:46.880 --> 0:38:51.799 just happen to just not have shame about bodily functions. 0:38:53.040 --> 0:38:56.879 They're a part of life society. Tech makes so many 0:38:56.920 --> 0:39:01.880 things taboo that are simply facts. People have sex with 0:39:01.920 --> 0:39:09.600 each other, take shits, they have diarrheas, hi they people, 0:39:09.640 --> 0:39:14.600 they people murder each other. That's happens. You know, all 0:39:14.600 --> 0:39:17.800 these things taboo. I don't know why we do it, Tasha, 0:39:17.880 --> 0:39:21.120 but props to you for doing your part to uh 0:39:21.680 --> 0:39:23.720 remove the stigma. 0:39:24.960 --> 0:39:27.120 Well, thank you. I appreciate that. I'm going to start 0:39:27.120 --> 0:39:27.959 looking at it that way. 0:39:28.920 --> 0:39:30.279 Anything else you want to say before we. 0:39:30.239 --> 0:39:34.239 Go, No, you just keep doing the good work that 0:39:34.280 --> 0:39:35.600 you do. I'll be coming back sometime. 0:39:36.400 --> 0:39:38.000 Thank you, Sasha, have a the rest of the night, 0:39:39.760 --> 0:39:41.960 you too. Hello is this Kellen. 0:39:44.040 --> 0:39:46.920 Yes, it is hello Kellen. 0:39:46.960 --> 0:39:47.600 What's going on? 0:39:47.719 --> 0:39:47.919 Man? 0:39:50.080 --> 0:39:53.279 Not much, just watching your stream and waiting for my turn. 0:39:54.960 --> 0:39:59.920 Well wait, no longer, your your turn has a right 0:40:01.400 --> 0:40:05.600 and here it is. It's right now. It's maybe never 0:40:05.640 --> 0:40:09.240 happen again. What would you like to do with this turn? 0:40:12.400 --> 0:40:14.040 First of all, I want to say I'm a huge fan, 0:40:14.160 --> 0:40:16.520 and also I have call anxiety, so you'll have to 0:40:16.560 --> 0:40:17.560 excuse me a little bit. 0:40:18.000 --> 0:40:20.759 Oh, I'm a huge fan of you. You have call anxiety? 0:40:20.800 --> 0:40:23.680 What is that? By the way? Okay, hold on. I've 0:40:24.560 --> 0:40:27.360 talked to another caller who said that they have call 0:40:27.480 --> 0:40:31.000 anxiety and they told me something and I don't know 0:40:31.040 --> 0:40:32.279 if it's the same with you, but they told me 0:40:32.280 --> 0:40:34.719 something that I found really interesting, which is they said 0:40:34.760 --> 0:40:37.399 that they don't have like normal social anxiety, like they 0:40:37.520 --> 0:40:40.840 like if they're talking to someone like in person, it's fine, 0:40:41.280 --> 0:40:45.719 but specifically on the phone they feel anxious. Is that 0:40:45.760 --> 0:40:49.640 you or are you sort of a three sixty anxiety guy? 0:40:51.760 --> 0:40:55.120 Uh so, that's actually kind of a funny thing. I 0:40:55.200 --> 0:40:58.759 do feel the same way. I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety, 0:40:59.239 --> 0:41:02.239 but I don't feel as anxious talking to people like 0:41:02.320 --> 0:41:05.040 face to face in person. It's usually when they can't 0:41:05.040 --> 0:41:08.440 see my facial expressions or my body language that I 0:41:08.480 --> 0:41:11.000 feel very anxious. 0:41:11.600 --> 0:41:14.920 Interesting I would I mean, I know you, I know 0:41:14.960 --> 0:41:19.000 there's no logic to the brain, but I feel like 0:41:19.120 --> 0:41:22.920 it would make sense that if people can't see your 0:41:23.200 --> 0:41:26.520 face or body, it don't makes it better because I 0:41:26.560 --> 0:41:30.759 can just do whatever I want here, you know, and 0:41:32.640 --> 0:41:38.320 it's fine. But but any who, any who? Enough about 0:41:38.960 --> 0:41:44.840 enough about life? Kellen, Kellen, how would you like to 0:41:44.920 --> 0:41:45.680 use your turn. 0:41:48.000 --> 0:41:52.200 H So, my my brother watches you a lot. He 0:41:52.280 --> 0:41:55.880 watches your tiktoks and your streams and stuff, and I 0:41:55.920 --> 0:42:00.000 guess I wanted to tell him something through this stream 0:42:00.280 --> 0:42:01.919 that I kind of feel like I'd never be able 0:42:01.960 --> 0:42:03.960 to tell him to his face because my brother is 0:42:03.960 --> 0:42:06.920 one of the only people I get physical anxiety with 0:42:09.000 --> 0:42:11.239 me and my most growing up. 0:42:12.280 --> 0:42:14.240 Why do you get physical anxiety from your brother? 0:42:17.440 --> 0:42:21.400 He's kind of like a parent to me almost. He 0:42:21.520 --> 0:42:23.799 kind of raised me when we were growing up, Like 0:42:24.120 --> 0:42:26.960 I still had my parents, but they were divorced and 0:42:27.000 --> 0:42:33.080 they were both my parents are something. So my brother 0:42:33.200 --> 0:42:36.359 was the one that was there for me, taking care 0:42:36.400 --> 0:42:38.560 of me and stuff. So I guess I just get 0:42:38.560 --> 0:42:40.480 a lot of anxiety because I don't want him to 0:42:40.480 --> 0:42:42.960 think badly of me, and I don't want to disappoint 0:42:43.080 --> 0:42:45.480 him by just being who I am. 0:42:45.560 --> 0:42:49.600 I guess mm hmmm hm, So go ahead. I I 0:42:50.120 --> 0:42:52.239 interrupted you by asking you a question. I want to 0:42:52.320 --> 0:42:52.759 let you talk. 0:42:55.920 --> 0:42:57.799 I guess I just really wanted to say that, like, 0:42:57.880 --> 0:43:01.040 I'm really grateful for my brother, and even if we 0:43:01.160 --> 0:43:03.440 argue and stuff, he is kind of like one of 0:43:03.440 --> 0:43:06.000 my best friends in the whole world. His name is Evan. 0:43:07.239 --> 0:43:09.399 He's a very good person, and he's taken very good 0:43:09.400 --> 0:43:11.680 care of me. We do get into arguments a lot, 0:43:11.719 --> 0:43:15.120 because all siblings do. But I guess I just really 0:43:15.200 --> 0:43:17.200 wanted to tell him, but I can't tell him face 0:43:17.239 --> 0:43:20.040 to face, which is that I appreciate him a lot, 0:43:20.200 --> 0:43:21.880 and he is one of my best friends in the 0:43:21.880 --> 0:43:23.560 whole world, and I really don't know what I do 0:43:23.640 --> 0:43:25.320 without him. 0:43:25.400 --> 0:43:29.000 Interesting, So he listens to this podcast, So you're saying 0:43:29.040 --> 0:43:31.640 this so that he'll listen to the podcast and he'll 0:43:31.640 --> 0:43:38.200 hear you say it. Yes, So why do you feel 0:43:38.239 --> 0:43:44.320 like you can't tell him this to his face? 0:43:47.440 --> 0:43:51.160 So, my brother's a very tough person, like he's he's 0:43:51.200 --> 0:43:53.799 one of those people where like if you cry in 0:43:53.840 --> 0:43:55.640 front of him or something like that, he'll he'll just 0:43:55.640 --> 0:43:57.680 get up and leave because he's not very good with 0:43:57.800 --> 0:44:00.359 dealing with emotions. And I understand that I don't want 0:44:00.360 --> 0:44:03.720 to like dump that on him, like I'm laughing. 0:44:05.320 --> 0:44:07.520 Well, I'm laughing because I feel like a lot of 0:44:08.640 --> 0:44:12.279 this this podcast is like, you know, people talking about 0:44:12.280 --> 0:44:14.640 all sorts of ship. So it's funny to me that 0:44:14.760 --> 0:44:20.919 he uh uh doesn't like people expressing themselves when that's 0:44:21.040 --> 0:44:24.759 sort of a lot of what goes on here. 0:44:25.920 --> 0:44:28.840 He mostly he mostly watches I will admit, for like 0:44:28.840 --> 0:44:32.120 the funny the funny poop stories and stuff like that. 0:44:32.200 --> 0:44:37.000 But I feel like maybe he should get interrupted by 0:44:37.080 --> 0:44:39.120 his younger brother giving him some love. 0:44:40.440 --> 0:44:42.719 Well, that's very sweet of you. That's very sweet of you. 0:44:44.719 --> 0:44:47.440 Hmm Okay. So, so you feel as though you have 0:44:47.480 --> 0:44:51.000 a hard time connecting with him because he's uh, he's 0:44:51.040 --> 0:44:56.200 not very uh emotionally available. 0:44:56.320 --> 0:45:04.239 Perhaps, Yeah, And I do understand because, like I said, 0:45:04.239 --> 0:45:08.040 our parents growing up, both of our parents have always 0:45:08.080 --> 0:45:10.799 been a little emotionally unavailable. So I can definitely see 0:45:10.800 --> 0:45:13.239 where he gets it from. And I do notice a 0:45:13.280 --> 0:45:17.280 lot that he's more emotionally available towards me than other people. 0:45:17.360 --> 0:45:19.959 But I guess my thing is, I mostly just don't 0:45:19.960 --> 0:45:24.719 want to overload him or give him the impression that 0:45:24.840 --> 0:45:28.319 I'm it's gonna sound rd like I want to give 0:45:28.360 --> 0:45:31.680 my brother the impression that I'm a strong person like 0:45:31.760 --> 0:45:34.279 he is and that I can do the things he 0:45:34.360 --> 0:45:38.200 can do. And I guess just I don't want to 0:45:38.239 --> 0:45:40.360 overload him with me being an emotional person. 0:45:41.440 --> 0:45:49.120 Hmm, this is interesting. You sound like you have a lie. 0:45:49.680 --> 0:45:53.200 I respect that. I respect that you. It's good. It's 0:45:53.360 --> 0:45:58.839 good to get into a practice of telling people how 0:45:58.920 --> 0:46:03.080 you feel about them. I think that's nice. We've had 0:46:03.120 --> 0:46:09.759 a lot of discussion about, you know, how short life is, 0:46:09.880 --> 0:46:12.360 and there's been a lot of mortality talk this evening 0:46:12.400 --> 0:46:19.359 and whatnot, and I feel like part of that is 0:46:19.560 --> 0:46:22.800 to recognize that, you know whatever, we don't have a 0:46:22.840 --> 0:46:25.560 lot of time left on this earth, and while we 0:46:25.680 --> 0:46:29.320 have people now, while we're here now, it's good to 0:46:29.400 --> 0:46:33.120 let people know how you feel about them. So I 0:46:33.480 --> 0:46:38.480 don't think that there's a weakness to that. I think 0:46:38.520 --> 0:46:44.160 there's maybe even an inherent strength to that, because you're right, 0:46:44.800 --> 0:46:49.120 it feels a little corny telling your friends you love them, 0:46:49.120 --> 0:46:52.680 telling uh, your brother you love them. You know they'll 0:46:52.719 --> 0:46:56.440 be like, what are you on drugs or something? You know, 0:46:56.600 --> 0:46:59.600 are you on a fucking ecstasy and that's why you're 0:46:59.600 --> 0:47:03.640 acting so weird? You're like, no, brother, I in sober mind, 0:47:04.560 --> 0:47:08.080 I would like to tell you that I appreciate you 0:47:08.560 --> 0:47:12.080 and I love you, and I mean even me acting 0:47:12.239 --> 0:47:14.600 you out right now saying that I feel a little weird. 0:47:17.000 --> 0:47:20.440 But whatever, we push through that because it has to 0:47:20.480 --> 0:47:23.879 be said, even if it's a little uncomfortable. 0:47:25.760 --> 0:47:29.439 Uh yeah, I really appreciate it, I guess. I guess. 0:47:29.520 --> 0:47:32.520 My other thing was that I also kind of guess 0:47:32.560 --> 0:47:36.280 I with all the existential talk, I kind of also 0:47:36.440 --> 0:47:39.799 wanted to tell him something else. I would never feel 0:47:39.840 --> 0:47:42.600 comfortable telling him face to face because we're both going 0:47:42.640 --> 0:47:46.200 through a struggle, which is I used to be in 0:47:46.280 --> 0:47:48.799 a very dark place where like I kind of not 0:47:48.960 --> 0:47:52.480 necessarily I wasn't like I didn't want to offer myself, 0:47:52.520 --> 0:47:57.400 like I just didn't want to exist. And my brother 0:47:57.520 --> 0:47:59.160 was the one that kind of showed me like, hey, 0:47:59.200 --> 0:48:01.960 life is you know, a lot more worth living than 0:48:02.080 --> 0:48:04.480 just oh life is crap, and I don't want to 0:48:04.480 --> 0:48:06.239 live it anymore. Like he's the one that showed me 0:48:06.320 --> 0:48:09.040 everything gets better and you're going to get better friends 0:48:09.040 --> 0:48:10.919 in the future, and you're going to have a better life. 0:48:10.920 --> 0:48:14.000 It just takes time. And I guess right now I'm 0:48:14.040 --> 0:48:15.880 seeing him kind of go through the thing that I 0:48:16.000 --> 0:48:18.520 was going through, and I don't know how to be 0:48:18.640 --> 0:48:20.759 there for him like he was for me, because since 0:48:20.800 --> 0:48:24.399 I'm such an emotional person and he's not very much 0:48:24.400 --> 0:48:27.040 an emotional person, he has the ability to just be like, 0:48:28.040 --> 0:48:30.200 not necessarily. He never told me to suck it up. 0:48:30.239 --> 0:48:32.319 He just told me, like, it gets better, and like, 0:48:32.400 --> 0:48:34.400 you will be emotional, but it gets better. And I 0:48:34.480 --> 0:48:36.600 just don't have the ability to say that because I'm 0:48:36.600 --> 0:48:39.120 a very like I'm the kind of person where I'm like, 0:48:39.120 --> 0:48:41.399 it's okay to cry and be emotional, get it out, 0:48:41.640 --> 0:48:44.040 do it. You gotta do it. And he's very like, 0:48:44.880 --> 0:48:48.080 if you have emotions, just not necessarily keep it in, 0:48:48.200 --> 0:48:52.680 but don't force it outwards. 0:48:53.120 --> 0:48:54.160 How old is your brother? Can I ask? 0:48:56.200 --> 0:48:58.200 He's twenty five. He's sixty years older than me. 0:48:58.840 --> 0:49:06.960 Okay, I'm about hmmmmmmmm mmmm. Okay, So your brother supported 0:49:07.000 --> 0:49:09.439 you through all this ship and now your brother's gone 0:49:09.440 --> 0:49:11.279 through some ship and you're like, A, how do I 0:49:11.600 --> 0:49:13.279 you know? You're you're You're like, I don't know if 0:49:13.280 --> 0:49:19.600 I have the tools to reciprocate, but your intentions are there. 0:49:20.360 --> 0:49:21.560 Your intentions are there. 0:49:22.920 --> 0:49:23.359 M hmm. 0:49:25.200 --> 0:49:29.000 I have a I have a couple thoughts that I'm 0:49:29.080 --> 0:49:31.120 like thinking about right now. Part of me wants to say, like, 0:49:32.080 --> 0:49:35.759 all right, well, you your brother showed you, uh what 0:49:35.880 --> 0:49:37.799 he You know, your brother sort of gave you his 0:49:37.960 --> 0:49:44.239 perspectives that's a little bit more stoic than yours. And 0:49:44.280 --> 0:49:47.919 I'm thinking, maybe maybe this is an opportunity to show 0:49:47.960 --> 0:49:51.799 your brother a little bit more of your perspective and 0:49:51.840 --> 0:49:56.719 see if he's open to that. But I don't know. 0:49:56.760 --> 0:49:58.200 I don't know how help in mind that he is 0:49:58.239 --> 0:50:02.200 to to your line of thinking. But I would say this, 0:50:05.480 --> 0:50:11.120 even if you don't feel like you can reciprocate directly 0:50:12.040 --> 0:50:15.800 what your brother has done for you to your brother, 0:50:16.960 --> 0:50:21.560 you know, like say that you're too intimidated or or 0:50:21.880 --> 0:50:24.360 you are gonna say some stuff to him and you 0:50:24.360 --> 0:50:27.839 don't feel like it'll get through to him, right Maybe 0:50:27.840 --> 0:50:30.520 if you feel like like reciprocating what he gave to 0:50:30.560 --> 0:50:34.200 you back to him is a lost cause I don't 0:50:34.200 --> 0:50:36.000 know if it is. But if that's how you're feeling, 0:50:37.560 --> 0:50:42.560 you're in luck because what your brother gave you, you 0:50:42.600 --> 0:50:47.600 don't necessarily have to reciprocate it back to him, right 0:50:50.239 --> 0:50:54.440 you can. You can. You can give that energy back 0:50:54.520 --> 0:50:59.000 to anyone, and that can be a form of reciprocation. Right, 0:50:59.040 --> 0:51:02.080 You can pay that forward to anyone in your life, 0:51:02.120 --> 0:51:08.920 you know, fucking strangers on the internet, your friends, whoever 0:51:08.960 --> 0:51:14.120 it is. So you could think of it like that, like, 0:51:14.560 --> 0:51:18.160 all right, my brother helped me out when I was 0:51:18.200 --> 0:51:21.279 going through some shit, and if he's not going to 0:51:21.360 --> 0:51:23.799 be open to me helping him out, whatever, I'll find 0:51:23.800 --> 0:51:28.000 a way to pay it forward to someone. And get this, 0:51:29.400 --> 0:51:31.360 you can do it in your own way, right. So, 0:51:31.400 --> 0:51:35.279 if that's your philosophy and your truth is you're the 0:51:35.400 --> 0:51:37.839 kind of guy that has you know, you have your 0:51:37.880 --> 0:51:42.400 own philosophy that you believe in that it's okay to cry, 0:51:42.560 --> 0:51:50.880 it's okay to feel, whatever your your mantra. Thing that 0:51:50.920 --> 0:51:56.440 you have to say is you can find someone, whoever 0:51:56.480 --> 0:52:01.680 it is and pay it forward like that, right doesn't 0:52:01.680 --> 0:52:03.880 necessarily and that and that and that can sort of 0:52:03.920 --> 0:52:08.920 be your way of reciprocation. Even if your brother is 0:52:08.920 --> 0:52:10.120 not into it. Does that make sense? 0:52:12.480 --> 0:52:13.279 Yeah, it does. 0:52:16.120 --> 0:52:19.680 That's actually that is really good advice because I guess 0:52:19.680 --> 0:52:22.360 I feel like I also have a responsibility that, you know, 0:52:22.440 --> 0:52:24.239 my brother did that for me, and I kind of 0:52:24.239 --> 0:52:26.919 feel like someone did that for me, you know, even 0:52:26.960 --> 0:52:29.279 if it wasn't my brother, that someone did that for me, 0:52:29.520 --> 0:52:31.960 and I should be able to do that for somebody else. 0:52:32.000 --> 0:52:34.600 And I guess knowing that being there for my brother 0:52:34.640 --> 0:52:36.960 in general and that I don't necessarily have to pay 0:52:36.960 --> 0:52:40.319 it forward to him specifically, is a lot of weight 0:52:40.360 --> 0:52:41.320 off my shoulders. 0:52:41.840 --> 0:52:45.840 Good good, Yeah, yeah, because I think, uh, because like 0:52:45.880 --> 0:52:50.880 you can't like the way you gotta you gotta, you 0:52:50.880 --> 0:52:53.680 gotta start of recognize this. This is sort of you know, 0:52:53.880 --> 0:52:58.640 my final thought on it is like, how your brother 0:52:59.239 --> 0:53:03.080 reacts to you, or how open your brother is to 0:53:03.480 --> 0:53:05.600 the things that you have to tell him is not 0:53:05.760 --> 0:53:08.080 within your control. It's not within your control at all. 0:53:09.320 --> 0:53:12.040 How your brother reacts or how your brother is not 0:53:12.239 --> 0:53:16.680 in your control. Your efforts and your intentions are in 0:53:16.719 --> 0:53:19.040 your control, and you have good intentions. It sounds like, 0:53:20.480 --> 0:53:24.359 uh so I would take that shit that isn't when 0:53:24.360 --> 0:53:27.200 you're within your control and do what you can in 0:53:27.200 --> 0:53:32.480 in that arena, you know what I'm saying. Yeah, And 0:53:34.920 --> 0:53:39.480 I think that reciprocating that to other people is totally 0:53:39.480 --> 0:53:42.239 in your control to just focus on that and not 0:53:42.640 --> 0:53:46.120 like focusing on getting your brother to come around, you 0:53:46.160 --> 0:53:46.720 know what I'm saying. 0:53:48.640 --> 0:53:55.040 Yeah, Well, Kellen, that very very good advice. 0:53:55.840 --> 0:53:58.719 I hope. So I'm doing the best I can as 0:53:58.760 --> 0:54:01.800 a gecko on the computer. I don't know anything about life. 0:54:03.239 --> 0:54:09.840 I'm fourteen years old, and I actually before I started streaming, 0:54:10.200 --> 0:54:15.080 I went to the bathroom and I when I took 0:54:15.239 --> 0:54:18.200 my h I had a little pee on the tip 0:54:18.239 --> 0:54:20.959 of my penis, and so I like shook it and 0:54:21.200 --> 0:54:24.720 it got a bunch of pea all over my geck pants. 0:54:25.080 --> 0:54:28.360 And then I, oh no, and so I had it 0:54:28.440 --> 0:54:32.040 was pretty like danse So I went. 0:54:32.160 --> 0:54:34.000 Oh, some dance on the pants. 0:54:34.120 --> 0:54:34.720 Oh God. 0:54:34.880 --> 0:54:37.440 And now and now I'm here talking to you with 0:54:37.520 --> 0:54:40.000 a little bit of a little bit of pea on 0:54:40.040 --> 0:54:40.919 my pants. 0:54:42.600 --> 0:54:45.040 You know what, though, That's how life is. Sometimes Sometimes 0:54:45.040 --> 0:54:46.399 you just got to talk to people with a little 0:54:46.400 --> 0:54:47.759 bit of pea on your pants. 0:54:48.840 --> 0:54:53.279 Beautiful, Talk to you soon, Kellen, talk to you later. 0:54:53.680 --> 0:54:54.320 Bye bye. 0:54:56.040 --> 0:54:57.719 Someone said I need to wash the suit I'm not 0:54:57.880 --> 0:55:12.000 washing the suit. It's too much work and I am lazy. Hello, Hey, 0:55:12.040 --> 0:55:14.000 what's up is this? 0:55:14.160 --> 0:55:14.319 Uh? 0:55:14.520 --> 0:55:16.080 Jeffrey Conrad? 0:55:17.360 --> 0:55:18.880 Yeah him? 0:55:19.239 --> 0:55:23.680 Uh, Normally it doesn't give me the first and last name, 0:55:23.680 --> 0:55:25.359 but you have. You have told the call screen are 0:55:25.360 --> 0:55:26.600 both your first and last name? 0:55:28.440 --> 0:55:32.319 Yeah? Well, the counter name is pretty powerful and where 0:55:32.360 --> 0:55:34.799 I'm from, so that's kind of why I give it. 0:55:36.000 --> 0:55:38.600 You said your name is very powerful where you come from. 0:55:40.600 --> 0:55:44.799 Yeah. So, Uh, my dad and my uncle own a 0:55:44.840 --> 0:55:48.200 dairy farm and we were actually featured on SNL. 0:55:50.000 --> 0:55:52.000 You were featured on SNL. 0:55:54.520 --> 0:55:57.880 Yes, it is a very short skit. The uh, the 0:55:57.960 --> 0:56:02.399 guy who does the uh daily news kind of gave 0:56:02.520 --> 0:56:05.240 like a very short just kind of like one liner 0:56:05.320 --> 0:56:06.560 about our farm. 0:56:08.120 --> 0:56:09.360 Oh you were on the weekend update. 0:56:11.200 --> 0:56:12.000 Yeah, pretty much. 0:56:13.000 --> 0:56:15.160 What do you remember what kind of mine was? 0:56:17.160 --> 0:56:22.200 Yeah? So they they pretty much said, uh, a farm 0:56:22.280 --> 0:56:27.120 in northeast Ohio has recently installed waterbeds for the cows. 0:56:27.600 --> 0:56:31.480 And then they also said this just in Uh, their 0:56:31.600 --> 0:56:34.959 farm has also introduced three ways for their cows something 0:56:35.000 --> 0:56:35.440 like that. 0:56:38.520 --> 0:56:44.080 How did you introducing waterbeds for your cows get to 0:56:44.120 --> 0:56:46.719 the point where it became news? 0:56:48.400 --> 0:56:48.840 Uh? 0:56:49.080 --> 0:56:51.440 So I want to say, either a CNN or Fox 0:56:51.520 --> 0:56:54.560 came by and just kind of did a thing about it, 0:56:54.640 --> 0:56:58.799 and my my dad and my uncle were just just 0:56:58.880 --> 0:57:01.280 happened to be there. You know, they owned the farm, 0:57:01.360 --> 0:57:05.160 so they, uh they kind of did a bit about it, 0:57:05.200 --> 0:57:08.279 and uh, you know, Fox and CNN they just kind 0:57:08.280 --> 0:57:11.560 of ate that ship up and I guess s and 0:57:11.600 --> 0:57:14.719 now got a huge thing about it and made a 0:57:14.800 --> 0:57:17.040 tiny skit about it. So I think it's pretty funny, 0:57:17.040 --> 0:57:19.480 you know. I every time I bring up to somebody, 0:57:19.520 --> 0:57:20.920 they think it's pretty funny. 0:57:21.840 --> 0:57:26.840 And did this bring any sort of notoriety to your 0:57:26.880 --> 0:57:30.320 family and their farm? 0:57:30.320 --> 0:57:30.800 Not really? 0:57:30.840 --> 0:57:33.840 I mean, uh, just anytime I bring it up to somebody, 0:57:33.880 --> 0:57:36.640 they just I just uh tell them that we were featured. 0:57:36.680 --> 0:57:38.400 And I said, now it's just one of those kind 0:57:38.440 --> 0:57:40.320 of small things that it's just kind of funny and 0:57:40.920 --> 0:57:42.240 people usually laugh about it. 0:57:42.280 --> 0:57:46.520 So, m did it did this little this this little 0:57:46.600 --> 0:57:51.040 taste right of being in front of the camera, getting 0:57:51.040 --> 0:57:56.840 a little attention on yourself? Did it not feel good? 0:57:56.840 --> 0:58:02.080 Did it spark anything within you too to uh seek 0:58:02.120 --> 0:58:06.800 after more news coverage or more notoriety for yourself for 0:58:06.960 --> 0:58:09.760 your farm? 0:58:10.000 --> 0:58:13.520 So I kind of take this from my dad and 0:58:13.560 --> 0:58:17.040 my uncle, and you know, they're very kind of self 0:58:17.160 --> 0:58:20.520 raised kind of people. They I didn't really like seek 0:58:20.560 --> 0:58:22.200 any fame for you know, I was kind of young 0:58:22.240 --> 0:58:24.640 when it came out, and uh, my dad and my 0:58:24.720 --> 0:58:30.080 uncle just kind of they just made short fame of it. 0:58:30.160 --> 0:58:35.000 And then since then, I, I don't know, it's just 0:58:35.080 --> 0:58:38.440 kind of cools, just one of those things just just 0:58:38.480 --> 0:58:40.960 to say to Yeah, we were future on it. And 0:58:40.960 --> 0:58:43.560 now they didn't really say us by name. But I 0:58:43.560 --> 0:58:46.760 don't know, I just just a conversation starter. 0:58:47.800 --> 0:58:51.840 So your farm boy sort of. 0:58:51.920 --> 0:58:55.520 I mean, I after I went to college, just kind 0:58:55.520 --> 0:59:00.000 of went to uh, went off to her, went off 0:59:00.120 --> 0:59:02.640 and did some engineering stuff and kind of broke away 0:59:02.680 --> 0:59:02.920 from that. 0:59:05.280 --> 0:59:07.720 And what are you doing now? You're in engineering school? 0:59:09.960 --> 0:59:13.040 No, so I graduated. Now I'm working at engineering firm. 0:59:14.320 --> 0:59:17.240 By the way, it says here that you called in 0:59:17.320 --> 0:59:20.360 because you wanted to talk about playing Monopoly. 0:59:22.600 --> 0:59:28.240 Yeah, so what are your takes on landing on the 0:59:28.320 --> 0:59:30.880 ghost space? Do you take four hundred or do you 0:59:30.920 --> 0:59:31.880 just take the two hundred? 0:59:32.600 --> 0:59:34.160 Oh, it's just one of those house rules. 0:59:35.880 --> 0:59:38.360 Yeah, I guess. I mean we were just playing some 0:59:38.400 --> 0:59:41.120 Monopoly and we were having some drinks and we were 0:59:41.160 --> 0:59:42.920 just kind of discussing. They're calling me a pussy for 0:59:43.040 --> 0:59:45.360 asking for four hundred. I was like, you know, that's 0:59:45.400 --> 0:59:47.080 just kind of how I've always played. 0:59:48.200 --> 0:59:52.080 I think, you know, here's the thing. I think when 0:59:52.120 --> 0:59:56.760 it comes to Monopoly, if you're going to be incorporating 0:59:56.800 --> 0:59:59.560 any sort of house rules, you have to set them 1:00:00.640 --> 1:00:06.720 before anything happens, because nothing's more annoying than creating rules 1:00:07.680 --> 1:00:10.440 as you go, because what will start to happen is 1:00:10.440 --> 1:00:16.040 you'll be creating rules that work primarily in your favor. Right, 1:00:16.280 --> 1:00:18.680 Like you have to set the if I land on 1:00:18.800 --> 1:00:21.680 go and I collect four hundred dollars rule. You have 1:00:21.720 --> 1:00:24.240 to set it immediately because if you set it only 1:00:24.280 --> 1:00:27.600 when you land on go, people are gonna think something's 1:00:27.600 --> 1:00:30.120 going on, which you know I would agree with. I 1:00:30.160 --> 1:00:31.640 would I would think something is going on. 1:00:33.480 --> 1:00:36.560 Right, And I think that that kind of happened. 1:00:36.600 --> 1:00:36.760 You know. 1:00:36.800 --> 1:00:39.880 I was starting to drink before the game started, and 1:00:39.920 --> 1:00:42.720 then when I landed on go, I was like, oh, 1:00:42.840 --> 1:00:44.800 so I get four hundred, and they're like, no, you're 1:00:44.800 --> 1:00:47.600 a pussy, you get two hundred. I was like, no, no, no, 1:00:47.880 --> 1:00:49.520 I guess that wasn't a part of this conversation. 1:00:50.400 --> 1:00:52.160 No, that see, that's the thing is you this this 1:00:52.200 --> 1:00:57.120 is this is a great example of the necessity for clear, 1:00:57.200 --> 1:01:01.560 honest and open communication. You must set the ground rules 1:01:01.800 --> 1:01:06.280 for the game at the very start lest you be 1:01:07.800 --> 1:01:12.240 reasonably accused of manipulation. 1:01:14.000 --> 1:01:19.840 Right right, which is very fair. So I definitely understand that. 1:01:19.920 --> 1:01:22.560 But uh, this little butt hurt that I didn't get 1:01:22.560 --> 1:01:23.640 my extra two hundred. 1:01:24.240 --> 1:01:27.360 But you know what, you know what, It's okay to 1:01:27.400 --> 1:01:30.080 be but hurt. It's okay to be butt hurt for 1:01:30.120 --> 1:01:35.280 a little bit. But your butt hurtness needs to drive 1:01:35.400 --> 1:01:40.200 you further towards learning this lesson. So so really really 1:01:40.240 --> 1:01:47.600 fuel your butt hurt and let it serve you so 1:01:47.640 --> 1:01:51.240 that next time, to avoid your butt hurt when you 1:01:51.280 --> 1:01:53.760 go to play monopoly, you will set your rules from 1:01:53.760 --> 1:01:54.240 the beginning. 1:01:56.200 --> 1:02:03.240 Yeah, I completely understand. And drinking beforehand. Yeah okay, yeah, absolutely, man, 1:02:03.400 --> 1:02:04.840 take care. I hope you have a great night. 1:02:05.160 --> 1:02:13.040 You as well. Never slept on a waterbed before, I 1:02:13.040 --> 1:02:20.000 wonder what it's like. Seems a little dangerous because if 1:02:20.000 --> 1:02:22.760 you're like flopping around on there a three some on 1:02:22.840 --> 1:02:27.040 a waterbed feels like it would eventually lead to some 1:02:27.320 --> 1:02:30.680 form of leakage feels like there is a lot of 1:02:30.800 --> 1:02:39.360 potential for multiple fluids to be intermingling in a situation 1:02:39.600 --> 1:02:42.360 like that, Like let's say there's a hole in the 1:02:42.400 --> 1:02:49.800 waterbed through which UH liquids can enter but not leave. 1:02:50.400 --> 1:02:55.200 If you have enough multi person sex, or even if 1:02:55.240 --> 1:02:58.400 you have enough standard two person sex on a waterbed 1:02:58.440 --> 1:03:01.000 like that, eventually, after for a few months, you'll be 1:03:01.040 --> 1:03:05.240 sleeping on a come and piss bed, which who knows, 1:03:06.000 --> 1:03:11.840 might be very comfortable. I gotta get a waterbed. Never 1:03:12.000 --> 1:03:15.160 be Get goes on the line taking your phone calls 1:03:15.200 --> 1:03:18.320 every night. Never be Get goes to it. His hide's 1:03:18.400 --> 1:03:21.080 teaching you cloud in the lid of your life. Money's 1:03:21.200 --> 1:03:23.560 not really an expert.