Speaker 1: Hello everybody, Welcome back to the show. Welcome back to
Speaker 1: the podcast, new listeners, old listeners, Wherever you are in
Speaker 1: the world, it is so great to have you here.
Speaker 1: Back for another episode as we, of course break down
Speaker 1: the psychology of our twenties. Today we're talking the psychology
Speaker 1: of routines. What is it about morning routines and nighttime
Speaker 1: routines and daily routines that people just swear by, and
Speaker 1: not just in their twenties, but throughout life. You know
Speaker 1: parents who swear by a routine for their children, sixty
Speaker 1: year olds, seventy year olds who seem like they are
Speaker 1: the happiest people in the world because they have routine.
Speaker 1: And is it really as simple as having a morning,
Speaker 1: waking time, or some general activity scheduled in your day.
Speaker 1: Could that be the simple answer to making us happier?
Speaker 1: Turns out there is a lot of evidence for routine,
Speaker 1: but also some downside, some controversies that we're going to
Speaker 1: talk talk about on today's episode. I am going to
Speaker 1: start out by being entirely honest with you all. I am,
Speaker 1: by no means someone who claims to be an expert
Speaker 1: in productivity or routine for that matter. You know, if
Speaker 1: I had to choose between productivity and discipline or creativity
Speaker 1: and spontaneity. I would most of the time choose creativity
Speaker 1: and spontaneity almost every day. But I have come around
Speaker 1: to the idea and I have been convinced that routine
Speaker 1: allows for both in you know, a way that actually
Speaker 1: lets you get the most out of what you want
Speaker 1: from life, even if it seems opposed to something that
Speaker 1: requires rigidity and strictness. And I have also realized in
Speaker 1: my own life that when I have structure, I feel better,
Speaker 1: I operate better, I have much greater clarity and focus.
Speaker 1: That is one side of the benefits that routine brings.
Speaker 1: You know, it brings a great reduction to anxiety, It
Speaker 1: brings greater time management, to name just to name a few,
Speaker 1: and a recent study looking at over a thousand individuals
Speaker 1: has even suggested that people who have a morning routine
Speaker 1: they typically earn more, they are happier, they have more
Speaker 1: fulfilling relationships. Even so, that is something that we need
Speaker 1: to most certainly look into, and I think even those
Speaker 1: things alone might persuade most of us who are on
Speaker 1: the fence to maybe start incorporating some rituals, some non
Speaker 1: negotiables and some protocols into our life. So we're going
Speaker 1: to talk about all of that today, Why routine is
Speaker 1: so good for our brains, why our brains crave it,
Speaker 1: and the routines of some of the most successful people
Speaker 1: in the world, and what we can take from those
Speaker 1: routines to apply to our own lives in a small
Speaker 1: and more sustainable way. I also want to talk about
Speaker 1: three very important tips for creating a routine that you
Speaker 1: will actually stick with, tips I'm guessing you probably haven't
Speaker 1: heard before, but also how to balance the need for
Speaker 1: spontaneity and the need for novelty with a desire for structure.
Speaker 1: It's a big episode, one that I think I'll probably
Speaker 1: end up coming back to myself, but as always, I
Speaker 1: hope that we learn something together. I hope that you
Speaker 1: find the psychology and the research fascinating. Without further ado,
Speaker 1: let's get into the episode. Routine is quite a broad term,
Speaker 1: so not to sound too simplistic in like a textbook,
Speaker 1: but I do want to give kind of a guideline
Speaker 1: around what this generally means what we're talking about today.
Speaker 1: MY definition of routine is that it is a series
Speaker 1: of habits that benefit your lifestyle that are repeated on
Speaker 1: a regular basis, so in the morning, evening, daily, weekly, monthly.
Speaker 1: And these habits have to be intentional, so you know,
Speaker 1: most people eat breakfast. That doesn't necessarily mean that it's
Speaker 1: a deliberate and specific routine. You have to be intentional
Speaker 1: with it, you know, putting a specific behavior at a
Speaker 1: time that corresponds best to your lifestyle, and you have
Speaker 1: to believe that it's going to help you in some
Speaker 1: area of your life. I think if someone was going
Speaker 1: to ask me for a definition, that's the best I
Speaker 1: can come up with. Now. Routine routines have been applauded
Speaker 1: by people all over the globe from all disciplines, from
Speaker 1: athletes to entertain as, business leaders, politicians, parents, students. You
Speaker 1: will find an example in every single domain of a
Speaker 1: routine that people swear by and people who will very
Speaker 1: readily tell you that it has changed their life. And
Speaker 1: there is a real fascination with what do successful people
Speaker 1: do in their day that sets them apart from other people's.
Speaker 1: Thousands of YouTube videos, thousands of articles, probably hundreds of
Speaker 1: books written on this very subject, but to keep it small.
Speaker 1: The reason that people love routine specifically the routines they've
Speaker 1: created for themselves. But really, any form of routine in general,
Speaker 1: is that it does for our brain what the modern
Speaker 1: world simply cannot. It provides structure, and it provides a
Speaker 1: sense of predictability that makes us feel safe and secure
Speaker 1: as much as our brain does like novelty, and we
Speaker 1: crave new experiences, things that are surprising, even the best
Speaker 1: kinds of surprises, even the good stuff that actually still
Speaker 1: causes us stress. That's the interesting thing about stress. A
Speaker 1: lot of people think that it's this negative, nasty thing.
Speaker 1: Stress just means arousal. They can be good stress, there
Speaker 1: can be bad stress. It still puts pressure on the body.
Speaker 1: But when we have a routine that kind of eases
Speaker 1: that necessary stress that we encounter in our daily lives
Speaker 1: by allowing us to almost switch off our brain for
Speaker 1: the routine stuff, for like the normal stuff we do
Speaker 1: day to day, and to save our cognitive resources for
Speaker 1: the surprising things, good and bad, and to make sure
Speaker 1: that you know, we give our brain rest so that
Speaker 1: it doesn't have to make as many decisions throughout our day.
Speaker 1: It can find comfort and stability in the patterns and
Speaker 1: habits that we have rehearsed Basically, like I said, with
Speaker 1: so much chaos going on, routine is like a nice
Speaker 1: cozy bed. It's like a nice home to go home to.
Speaker 1: I think the biggest evidence for why routines work and
Speaker 1: why they help us is how much they actually alleviate
Speaker 1: anxiety and how much it removes so many of the
Speaker 1: unknowns that anxiety and negative stress really thrives on. So
Speaker 1: there's this two thousand and two research paper that I've
Speaker 1: read for this episode that basically concluded that those of
Speaker 1: us who lack routine, we essentially leave the door open
Speaker 1: for more minor disruptions, and those minor disruptions can snowball
Speaker 1: into ongoing and chronic stress, but also more persistent and
Speaker 1: probable anxiety. I will say, like I said before, the
Speaker 1: times I have been most routine bound have been the
Speaker 1: days that I feel more at peace. I wake up
Speaker 1: with less sense of urgency, I have less thoughts running
Speaker 1: through my head, I don't face as much choice overload.
Speaker 1: Routine is this very beautiful way of allowing us to
Speaker 1: explore and be creative and be big thinkers, whilst also
Speaker 1: knowing that we have something to ground us. So there's
Speaker 1: two words there that I think are really crucial for
Speaker 1: understanding the benefits of routine. It's certainty and its grounding.
Speaker 1: Those are the two really important components. And we can
Speaker 1: probably out a final word in here, and that is efficiency.
Speaker 1: So certainty grounding efficiency. So a twenty sixteen paper from
Speaker 1: Harvard Business School, just to float another study out there
Speaker 1: for you, they found that by decreasing anxiety, which we
Speaker 1: know is what routine does, rituals, routines, protocols, they improve
Speaker 1: mental performance and they improve cognitive performance as well, because
Speaker 1: they become a way for us to get the most
Speaker 1: out of our hours by really streamlining processes at critical
Speaker 1: time periods. So in the morning or the evening, there's
Speaker 1: a lot that needs to get done in those opening
Speaker 1: and closing shifts, and it can quickly consume our whole
Speaker 1: day if we don't use our time and the limited
Speaker 1: hours we have in those pockets of time most efficiently.
Speaker 1: That's what routine does. You know, if you have a
Speaker 1: solid morning routine, you don't have to set your alarm
Speaker 1: every night for what time you want to wake up.
Speaker 1: You've already done it, you know what time it will be.
Speaker 1: You don't have to think about what you're going have
Speaker 1: for breakfast every morning. You don't have to calculate when
Speaker 1: you can squeeze in a workout. It's all laid out
Speaker 1: for you, like this gift from a prior version of
Speaker 1: you who thought, Okay, let's just make this all a
Speaker 1: little bit smoother. Let's make this a little bit easier,
Speaker 1: more effortless. Routine and allocating dedicated time slots for specific
Speaker 1: tasks have also been shown to make us more productive, obviously,
Speaker 1: because we have a distinct time period where something needs
Speaker 1: to get done. That really increases focus and what we
Speaker 1: call task based urgency, meaning that if you have fifteen
Speaker 1: minutes that you put aside every day to do something,
Speaker 1: you are more likely to use that time for the
Speaker 1: desired activity. You're less likely to compromise, and that actually
Speaker 1: means that you'll achieve more, but also you'll be happier
Speaker 1: because if you can streamline kind of the annoying things,
Speaker 1: the admin tasks of life, the brushing of the teeth,
Speaker 1: the showering, like the admin emails, you do end up
Speaker 1: having more time to just be a human, to enjoy yourself,
Speaker 1: to have fun, and those benefits they are not sequested
Speaker 1: by age. They don't disappear, you know, at a certain age.
Speaker 1: It doesn't take a specific time or age for them
Speaker 1: to start. So maybe I should explain this in a
Speaker 1: better way. Basically, routine benefits everyone. I came across a
Speaker 1: really cool paper while researching this episode from twenty eighteen,
Speaker 1: and it talks about how good routine is for children specifically,
Speaker 1: and how there are some pediatricians and some teachers who
Speaker 1: can tell the kids that have a bedtime, who have
Speaker 1: a dinner time, who have homework or family time compared
Speaker 1: to those who don't, and those kids are typically more resilient,
Speaker 1: they're less stressed, and they have better attention spans. So
Speaker 1: when we take that same logic into adulthood, you know,
Speaker 1: when we are adults, we don't have a parent telling
Speaker 1: us to do. We are the primary grown up in
Speaker 1: our lives, being like, Okay, I'm going to be a
Speaker 1: little bit strict with myself here, and I'm going to
Speaker 1: allocate certain times I'm going to create routine. Those same
Speaker 1: structures that helped us as children will continue to help
Speaker 1: us as adults. This is specifically the case when life
Speaker 1: feels naturally or like contextually very stressful, like whenever I
Speaker 1: get dams from people being like I'm so overwhelmed at UNI.
Speaker 1: I've just been through this huge breakup, and I feel
Speaker 1: like the world is crumbling underneath me. I always say,
Speaker 1: you need to start practicing some kind of grounding ritual
Speaker 1: or routine for yourself. You need to lower the cognitive
Speaker 1: burden of even the most minute decision making tasks, because
Speaker 1: your brain needs all the stability that it can get
Speaker 1: during exam periods, during really difficult emotional times. If you
Speaker 1: can just make some things more automatic, that gives you
Speaker 1: more time to process and to think and to be
Speaker 1: able to problem solve. So I hope that just like
Speaker 1: big mount of evidence that I've just thrown at you,
Speaker 1: has made a compelling case. You know, it's evidence that
Speaker 1: I probably need to re listen to myself at times.
Speaker 1: I need to stop scheduling meetings at eight am during
Speaker 1: my morning routine. I need to find a dedicated time
Speaker 1: to work out because it's always the last thing on
Speaker 1: my list for the day. Like I definitely need to
Speaker 1: have a better bedtime. But consider me like an imperfect
Speaker 1: version of success or adherence here, like do better than me.
Speaker 1: But also it's hopefully an example, like hopefully you can
Speaker 1: use my life as an example of how even just
Speaker 1: going forward imperfectly with your routine. Although those things routine
Speaker 1: and imperfect like sound contradictory, like if you can just
Speaker 1: show up as often as possible in your desired routine,
Speaker 1: your life does get better. All right, Let's talk about
Speaker 1: some of the most effective routines in the world. What
Speaker 1: do some of the most successful people on this planet
Speaker 1: do in their mornings, evenings, afternoons, and nights. Some of
Speaker 1: these are rather intense. I will say I love hearing
Speaker 1: people's morning routines, but there are times when I'm like, wow,
Speaker 1: like four am, wake up. You get all of that
Speaker 1: done before you've even had lunch, Like, how am I
Speaker 1: even able to compare? We will be taking small lessons
Speaker 1: from these routines. Please don't consider these as like options
Speaker 1: for you to choose from. I think they're just very,
Speaker 1: very fascinating. So with that in mind, let's start with
Speaker 1: Barack Obama, former president of the United States. So he
Speaker 1: would reportedly wake up at seven am every morning. Honestly,
Speaker 1: seven ams pretty early in my mind, but kind of
Speaker 1: later than I thought a president would wake up, But
Speaker 1: that's what he does. Seven am. He would work out
Speaker 1: six days a week for forty five minutes. He apparently
Speaker 1: told his aids that the rest of my time will
Speaker 1: be more productive if you give me my workout time,
Speaker 1: which that's a man who prioritizes. He would then have
Speaker 1: breakfast with his family if he was like in the
Speaker 1: White House, which we love a family man, then this
Speaker 1: is a really beautiful part of his routine. He would
Speaker 1: then walk one minute to his office in the Oval office,
Speaker 1: because of course he lived in the White House. And
Speaker 1: he said that was like his thinking time. That was
Speaker 1: like almost to meditation, a one minute solo walk to
Speaker 1: work basically where he would just allow himself to just
Speaker 1: breathe think, imagine, do whatever a president does, I guess
Speaker 1: with that time. I think this is a really really
Speaker 1: simple routine for someone who was at the time, you know,
Speaker 1: like the busiest and most influential person in the world.
Speaker 1: But what I like about it was that it was predictable,
Speaker 1: it's easy to follow, and it's not like as intense
Speaker 1: as you would imagine. Let's talk about Anna Winter's routine.
Speaker 1: Obviously the editor in chief of Vogue. Now. She apparently
Speaker 1: wakes up at five forty five am and then she
Speaker 1: plays tennis for an hour on the dot finishing at seven.
Speaker 1: So she says this keeps a physically fit. It also
Speaker 1: helps her sharpen her focus, and then following her game,
Speaker 1: she spends the next hour and a half in hair
Speaker 1: and makeup, and she does it every day. She says,
Speaker 1: it's like ensures that she is ready for her demanding schedule.
Speaker 1: I think if you are like someone who wears makeup,
Speaker 1: you understand this feeling. I remember, like when I was
Speaker 1: at Uni, I would do a full face of makeup
Speaker 1: every single day before I left my dorm room before
Speaker 1: I went to class, and some of my friends would
Speaker 1: be like that seems a little bit unnecessary, but I
Speaker 1: was like, this is meditative. This is a way to
Speaker 1: just be like I'm present with myself for twenty minutes
Speaker 1: thirty minutes doing this like ritual of like painting my
Speaker 1: face and like making myself feel presentable. That does influence
Speaker 1: how I feel for the rest of the day, which
Speaker 1: I think is really special. Let's talk about an unusual one.
Speaker 1: We've had two that seem like pretty cut and dry,
Speaker 1: like exercise as a priority, very busy people. Jim Carrey,
Speaker 1: Let's talk about his routine. Very famous comedian. Apparently he
Speaker 1: has just this one daily ritual that at eleven am
Speaker 1: every single day he calls himself and he pretends that
Speaker 1: it's someone from the past calling him with some news
Speaker 1: or calling him to tell him something. And he comes
Speaker 1: up with a new character every single day, and it's
Speaker 1: like a creative exercise for him to get the juice
Speaker 1: is flowing. So there you go. There's another example of
Speaker 1: how it can be very much suited to who you are.
Speaker 1: I want to touch on one more famous morning routine.
Speaker 1: You've probably heard of it before. It's Andrew Huberman's very
Speaker 1: famous ritual for his early mornings. So Andrew Huberman, he
Speaker 1: is a neuroscientist. You may have listened to him on
Speaker 1: the Huberman Lab. I will say, I don't necessarily agree
Speaker 1: with everything that the man has to say, but his
Speaker 1: morning routine is definitely interesting, definitely evocative, and according to
Speaker 1: his own research, highly productive. So let's talk about it. So,
Speaker 1: his morning routine consists of waking up two to three
Speaker 1: hours before you habitually wake up. So most of us
Speaker 1: have obviously, we have circadian rhythm, we have a body clock.
Speaker 1: Most of us have a time that we would naturally
Speaker 1: like to wake up at. You know, I know For me,
Speaker 1: it's around eight o'clock, Like that's when my body is like,
Speaker 1: all right, we're awake. If I oversleep past that time,
Speaker 1: I always feel a little bit groggy. If I get
Speaker 1: up earlier, I'm always a little bit like I have
Speaker 1: to really pull myself out of bed. He says, that's
Speaker 1: a good thing. Get up two to three hours before
Speaker 1: you would habitually wake up. Then hydrate, drink five hundred
Speaker 1: miles of water, Get ten to thirty minutes of morning
Speaker 1: light exposure. This one's a bit hard, like if you
Speaker 1: live somewhere that's really dark in the mornings, Like you know,
Speaker 1: if your normal wake up time is eight and you
Speaker 1: have to wake up at six or five and the
Speaker 1: sun doesn't rise till nine. This seems like a bit
Speaker 1: of a Californian thing, but let's keep going. Then you
Speaker 1: want to exercise for at least forty minutes forty minutes
Speaker 1: three to four times a week, either cardio or weight training, shower,
Speaker 1: and then you do ninety minutes of focused work before
Speaker 1: lunch or like just in that first early morning bit.
Speaker 1: Ninety minutes. Apparently, that's like you should be able to
Speaker 1: sit down and just knock out all those early morning things,
Speaker 1: and then he has something for his afternoon as well,
Speaker 1: which is he does like ten to thirty minutes of
Speaker 1: non sleep deep rest or hypnosis or a nap, and
Speaker 1: then he gets ten to fifteen minutes of evening light
Speaker 1: exposure intensive. Some key points to this. His focus really
Speaker 1: seems on streamlining alertness, being very in touch with his body.
Speaker 1: He also has this thing of like delaying caffeine intake
Speaker 1: by like an hour and a half after you wake up,
Speaker 1: So really letting our bodies nap truly regulate through light exposure,
Speaker 1: through hydration, which you know, really does prepare the body
Speaker 1: and it stimulates a lot of neuromodulators and increase arousal
Speaker 1: and mental acuity throughout the day. It's a good thing.
Speaker 1: But if we're going to look at all of these
Speaker 1: routines holistically, they do have one thing in common. They
Speaker 1: all revolve around the thing that is most important to
Speaker 1: that person and a singular non negotiable. Whether it's exercise,
Speaker 1: whether it's makeup, whether it is alertness, whether it is
Speaker 1: a phone call. And what those priorities indicate to me
Speaker 1: are values they suit the person's values. Is it family, creativity, confidence,
Speaker 1: mental clarity, physical health, and that kind of leads me
Speaker 1: to the question, right, is there a best routine? Of
Speaker 1: all these examples, is one of them best? And the
Speaker 1: answer is, you know, a little bit more complicated than
Speaker 1: you would think. We're going to talk about all of
Speaker 1: that and more. Stay with us after this short break.
Speaker 1: Is there a perfect routine? The answer is no. There
Speaker 1: is not a universal routine that is going to work
Speaker 1: perfectly for everyone, but there are ingredients to a routine
Speaker 1: that will most certainly help you, and also a routine
Speaker 1: that will hit some of those core pillars of health
Speaker 1: that we want to target. Firstly, if you're going to
Speaker 1: start with a routine, choose either the morning or the evening.
Speaker 1: This is an amazing way to bookend your day with
Speaker 1: good habits. So I feel like a work a you know,
Speaker 1: a midday routine or a workday routine is a little
Speaker 1: bit complicated and takes a lot of effort. But your
Speaker 1: evening and your morning routine they kind of only take
Speaker 1: like an hour or an hour of half, So that's
Speaker 1: really where you should begin to focus. I think, you know,
Speaker 1: your morning routine sets the tone, but your night routine
Speaker 1: gives you the last taste of the day. It allows
Speaker 1: for restoration, whatever one you choose. Depending on which you choose,
Speaker 1: what each of these routines need to be centered around
Speaker 1: is something to do with sleep, something to do with movement,
Speaker 1: and something that is going to make your life easier.
Speaker 1: So for example, laying out your outfit for the next day,
Speaker 1: gratitude journaling, not going on your phone thirty minutes after
Speaker 1: you wake up or thirty minutes before bed. Most effective
Speaker 1: routines contain at least two of the above, and they
Speaker 1: start small before expanding. You know, after that, some people
Speaker 1: might add in meal times, liquid, showering, makeup, whatever it
Speaker 1: is that you know you feel needs to be done.
Speaker 1: It is structured around, firstly, things that are small, and
Speaker 1: we're going to talk about why that's important. Something that
Speaker 1: I really think if you are more focused on creating
Speaker 1: like a daily routine instead of setting up like a
Speaker 1: specific time blocking a gender to begin with. Instead, I
Speaker 1: want you to kind of think about a checklist routine
Speaker 1: instead of like a specific time routine. And it's my
Speaker 1: opinion that your daily checklist, your daily routine checklist should
Speaker 1: prioritize these five things. Something for your health, something productive,
Speaker 1: something for your mental health, something for you socially and
Speaker 1: something just for you. So health, productivity, mental, social, just
Speaker 1: for you. If you want to hit the five pillars
Speaker 1: of happiness in our life, you may also include spirituality
Speaker 1: in there. Those are the ones that I would be
Speaker 1: focusing on. So jim in the morning, writing out a
Speaker 1: to do list as soon as I sit down at
Speaker 1: my desk, ten minutes of meditation, seeing friends for lunch
Speaker 1: or dinner, and then watching my favorite show or doing
Speaker 1: something crafty before. But like that is the perfect day
Speaker 1: that involves specific protocols I know will make me happy.
Speaker 1: It also makes sense that, like when we're talking about
Speaker 1: choosing routine, different routines are gonna work for different professions,
Speaker 1: different personalities, different people. So if you are someone who
Speaker 1: works night shifts, a morning routine starting at six am
Speaker 1: isn't gonna work for you because you're just clocking off
Speaker 1: or you're at the end of your shift. If you're
Speaker 1: someone who has ADHD, a highly intensive time bound routine
Speaker 1: with many many steps, many different parts also probably won't work,
Speaker 1: or maybe it will. Actually, you know, I have been
Speaker 1: seeing recent studies about how time blocking for ADHD is
Speaker 1: really effective, really helps with time blindness. But I think
Speaker 1: you've had to have had some practice before you jump
Speaker 1: straight in. My point is really this, You've got to
Speaker 1: choose what's best for you. Like I do not wake
Speaker 1: up at six am because I know that I am
Speaker 1: most productive between seven and ten pm. So I want
Speaker 1: to prioritize that time period of my life knowing that
Speaker 1: that's what my peak performance is, right than trying to
Speaker 1: fit myself into the circle or the box of someone
Speaker 1: else's routine. So, coming back to what we were talking before,
Speaker 1: how do I choose my routine? How do I start
Speaker 1: with the structure. Once you've kind of decided morning or
Speaker 1: night routine, the first thing I really want you to
Speaker 1: do is reflect on one thing that you are trying
Speaker 1: to prioritize in your life right now. Some examples. Is
Speaker 1: it exercising, is it limiting social media time? Is it
Speaker 1: reading more? Is it feeling more rested? All of these
Speaker 1: sound amazing. I want you to choose just one that
Speaker 1: is going to become the centerpiece upon which you are
Speaker 1: going to build everything else around. So let's say your
Speaker 1: biggest goal is to get more daily movement. You know,
Speaker 1: you work in an office, you sit all day, You're
Speaker 1: feeling sluggish if that's your priority. Then I want you
Speaker 1: to assess your day for where there is the most
Speaker 1: time loss by doing a quick time audit. Basically, when
Speaker 1: you do a time audit, you're meant it's really meant
Speaker 1: to help you identify where you are perhaps dedicating too
Speaker 1: much time to what I call lost hours. So lost
Speaker 1: hours include time scrolling your phone, time sleeping past the
Speaker 1: point of restoration, time spent in bed, time spent procrastinating.
Speaker 1: Of course, sometimes you know having a bit of bed
Speaker 1: rot or brain rot is helpful. Sometimes you really do
Speaker 1: just need to turn your brain off in front of
Speaker 1: the TV for a little while. Sometimes you have slept
Speaker 1: ten hours because you really need it. But if that
Speaker 1: means if that is consistently and it's not actually helping you,
Speaker 1: that is where your lost hours are probably sitting. So
Speaker 1: where on your day do you have the most lost hours?
Speaker 1: Is it morning, middle of the day or afternoon slash evening.
Speaker 1: Let's say for this example, it's evening. That is where
Speaker 1: you're going to choose your first routine. Where you have
Speaker 1: that priority that you want to get done, You're going
Speaker 1: to put it where there is most time wastage. Pretty simple.
Speaker 1: This also really helps you work with what you have
Speaker 1: instead of feeling like you need to eat into more
Speaker 1: valuable things in order to get stuff done, like working out,
Speaker 1: like you're finding space that you already have available. Like
Speaker 1: I said before, we are also going to structure our
Speaker 1: routine for seven or eight hours of sleep. So know
Speaker 1: where you want to Like, where do you want to sleep?
Speaker 1: Are you someone who prefers an early night or a
Speaker 1: sleep in? In this case, we're doing evening, so we
Speaker 1: are perhaps I'm guessing, considering a bit of a sleep in.
Speaker 1: And choose where you want to insert your major habit,
Speaker 1: what you want your bedtime to be, and work backwards
Speaker 1: from that time to kind of create the structure. So
Speaker 1: I want to go to bed at eleven PM. My
Speaker 1: major habit is that I want to work out. I
Speaker 1: want to work out at least three hours before bed.
Speaker 1: I'm going to have this really nice evening afternoon routine
Speaker 1: working towards this idea that I will be embedd at
Speaker 1: a certain time. So this is kind of how I
Speaker 1: do it. If I know I want to go to
Speaker 1: bed at a certain time, I know I want my
Speaker 1: teeth to be brushed, my face to be washed, my
Speaker 1: sheets to be all cozy, my water to be filled
Speaker 1: by another time. So let's say an hour, and I
Speaker 1: know I want to get home from the gym and
Speaker 1: do X y Z for maybe like thirty minutes, have
Speaker 1: a bit of a decompress. So my routine would be Okay,
Speaker 1: I finish work, I go home, I make dinner, I
Speaker 1: go to the gym for an hour, even if the
Speaker 1: workout is terrible, I stay for an hour. Then I
Speaker 1: come home and then I start that secondary part of
Speaker 1: my morning routine that kind of caps caps off the night.
Speaker 1: But really, the one thing I want to ensure that
Speaker 1: you get out of this is that we are focusing
Speaker 1: on only one habit that we consider tier one. So
Speaker 1: your tier one habit is the one thing you cannot
Speaker 1: compromise on. As you get better at not compromising on it,
Speaker 1: then you can start adding in Tier two habits like
Speaker 1: a five minute meditation or a fifteen minute you know,
Speaker 1: journal practice, or of sunlight. The reason this is important
Speaker 1: to secure is that even if you fail a tier
Speaker 1: to habit, your day will still be a victory if
Speaker 1: you get your tier one habit done. And this really
Speaker 1: avoids like a very unhealthy all or nothing thinking mentality
Speaker 1: of needing to have a routine with a thousand steps.
Speaker 1: We really want to standardize one activity before we add
Speaker 1: or optimize other areas. So I say this because I
Speaker 1: see many people try and create those crazy morning routines.
Speaker 1: It's too complex, it's too complex to have too many
Speaker 1: small things that have too small, minuscule you know, time
Speaker 1: blocks and hope they all add up. Because things happen,
Speaker 1: things go wrong, we're busy, we're tired. We want to
Speaker 1: simplify the process. Also, research from the University of College
Speaker 1: London found that on average, it takes sixty six days
Speaker 1: for a new habit to stick. If you have too
Speaker 1: many habits, they ain't going to stick. There's going to
Speaker 1: be too many of them that you need to be really,
Speaker 1: really loyal and dedicated to for you know, almost two
Speaker 1: and a half months at that point. So if you
Speaker 1: set and you stick to a new plan or a
Speaker 1: new habit for sixty six days, there is a good
Speaker 1: chance that that routine is going to become something that
Speaker 1: feels like a non negotiable and then you add on
Speaker 1: from there. Like I always think about it, like building
Speaker 1: a house. You don't put the furniture in before you
Speaker 1: have a floor, plan or foundation. This is known in
Speaker 1: psychology and in other areas as the compound effect, and
Speaker 1: it is a proven strategy. From there, we can also
Speaker 1: habit stack. I feel like I've spoken about this before.
Speaker 1: Habit stacking feels like magic. Honestly, what it involves is
Speaker 1: taking one thing that you already do and then just
Speaker 1: adding one more thing to it, you know, brushing your
Speaker 1: teeth in the shower, listening to your lectures whilst on
Speaker 1: the treadmill, calling your long distance friends, whilst meal prepping. Remember,
Speaker 1: your time during your day is expansive. It's not just linear.
Speaker 1: It can hold multiple tasks at the same time. I
Speaker 1: think my other biggest tip for setting up a routine
Speaker 1: is to romanticize your routine, rather than feeling like it's
Speaker 1: something you have to do that you must do, that
Speaker 1: you're dragging yourself into. I love the feeling of exercising
Speaker 1: in the evenings so I can be kind of like
Speaker 1: all sweaty and like cap off my day with some
Speaker 1: final real push and then I get to have this
Speaker 1: really nice shower. Like. I like how that makes me feel.
Speaker 1: I love how romantic it feels to work late into
Speaker 1: the night. I'm like some tortured rider or like a
Speaker 1: hard working CEO. Like I like that feeling. I romanticize
Speaker 1: that feeling. My friends who swear by their morning routines
Speaker 1: always tell me how peaceful and quiet it is before
Speaker 1: the sun comes up, and what it's like to really
Speaker 1: just spend three minutes with their coffee and just focus
Speaker 1: in on all the sensations. So that is really the
Speaker 1: second part of what I want you to do. Once
Speaker 1: you have your baseline secured, once you've decided on the
Speaker 1: major habit, once you've decided whether it's a morning or
Speaker 1: a night routine, then it's time to be like, Wow,
Speaker 1: I'm so lucky I get to do this. This is fun,
Speaker 1: This is a process. This is almost a bit sentimental,
Speaker 1: a bit romantic. I'm going to move on from all
Speaker 1: the warm and fuzzies and many many benefits of routine.
Speaker 1: Let's talk about some of the criticisms. Because nothing is
Speaker 1: ever one hundred percent faultless, otherwise obviously everyone would be
Speaker 1: doing it, and routine setting routine building is no different.
Speaker 1: The biggest issue or struggle that people have with routine,
Speaker 1: and let me know, if you relate to this, it's
Speaker 1: that a it can be really boring and b It
Speaker 1: can be difficult to be spontaneous. The monotony of doing
Speaker 1: the same thing every single day can weigh you down.
Speaker 1: It has its own name. It's called the groundhog Day effect,
Speaker 1: named after the movie Groundhog Day. So the groundhog Day
Speaker 1: effect basically refers to the feeling of repeatedly experiencing the
Speaker 1: same day over and over again, and how that leads
Speaker 1: to a lot of frustration, a lack of purpose, a
Speaker 1: lot of boredom, and it makes you feel like there's
Speaker 1: nothing new in your life, which can at times also
Speaker 1: make us quite depressed. That is the risk with being
Speaker 1: too structured and strict with your routine. The biggest solution
Speaker 1: to this is to not go overboard. You are not
Speaker 1: a drill sergeant. You are not a member of the army.
Speaker 1: I want you to make sure that you are giving
Speaker 1: yourself a day off every couple of weekends or every weekend.
Speaker 1: I want you to break up your routine every couple
Speaker 1: of weeks. Keep the foundation the same, but make the
Speaker 1: details different. So the workouts are different, the alarm sound
Speaker 1: is different, the meal prep is different, the journal prompts
Speaker 1: are different, the commute is a little bit different. And
Speaker 1: please don't sacrifice novel experiences. Don't let yourself turn your
Speaker 1: back to newness an opportunity. You know, missing out on
Speaker 1: an amazing last minute concert is a lot worse than
Speaker 1: skipping your evening routine one day this month. I know
Speaker 1: a lot of people will stress to you discipline, unwavering, dedication, commitment,
Speaker 1: But you know that's really not everything in life, is it.
Speaker 1: There should be room for spontaneity over constant efficiency and
Speaker 1: constant hitting of our routine KPIs. We also don't want
Speaker 1: to feel like we're missing out or we're experiencing social
Speaker 1: isolation from our routine. Routine is meant to help us.
Speaker 1: It's meant to increase happiness, increase you know, mental focus,
Speaker 1: increase productivity. If we are lonely, if we are sad,
Speaker 1: if we are resentful and frustrated, that is doing the opposite,
Speaker 1: that is not helping. I just think that if your
Speaker 1: routine also becomes too restrictive of your social life, you
Speaker 1: will present it and then you won't do it. So
Speaker 1: stress test your routine for kind of two to three
Speaker 1: weeks and see if you know it's causing a lot
Speaker 1: of roadblocks, See if it's something that will require minor adjustments,
Speaker 1: you know, but so that you don't have to give
Speaker 1: up major sacrifices, because if you will, again like it's
Speaker 1: not going to be long lasting, you won't see the benefit.
Speaker 1: Please please, please start small. I will also say you
Speaker 1: can and should have periods of your life where you
Speaker 1: are not bound by daily, weekly, or evenly even you know,
Speaker 1: monthly commitments or protocols. You should have times in your
Speaker 1: life where the soul focus of your life is not
Speaker 1: to get things done. I think it's actually quite mentally
Speaker 1: healthy to sometimes give yourself space to just be a
Speaker 1: little bit free and to just wake with the sun,
Speaker 1: go down with the sun, to let yourself do what
Speaker 1: suits your rhythm's best without feeling like you have to
Speaker 1: drag yourself from task to task. It feels, you know,
Speaker 1: quite human. And I know a lot of us look
Speaker 1: at that and they're like, wow, I don't think I
Speaker 1: could have that relaxed attitude with the job I have
Speaker 1: or with the life I have. But you do have
Speaker 1: the weekend, and you do have space during the holidays,
Speaker 1: Like obviously that's what holidays are made for, is to
Speaker 1: break you out of routine that gives you the necessary
Speaker 1: newness and freshness to go back with renewed vigor and
Speaker 1: dedication to the structure of you know, a moo moannotonous life.
Speaker 1: So please, life is not all about having routine, It's
Speaker 1: not all about having structure. It definitely does help us,
Speaker 1: and there is a lot of reasons why we should
Speaker 1: hold ourselves accountable and a lot of other strategies like
Speaker 1: time blocking or time management that also fits in with this.
Speaker 1: But hopefully this is like a basic instruction on how
Speaker 1: to get started. Hopefully this has convinced you of why
Speaker 1: you need a small routine with just a couple of things,
Speaker 1: specifically a wake up time, specifically one core habit, and
Speaker 1: you can kind of build it out from there. Again,
Speaker 1: I appreciate that you've listened this far. If you have
Speaker 1: the emoji I want you to leave in the comments
Speaker 1: is an alarm clock. If you want to detail your
Speaker 1: routine in the comments, I am fascinated by it. I
Speaker 1: cannot wait to read them. I love seeing what people
Speaker 1: do because they can be so niche and so specific
Speaker 1: to the individual. So drop like a couple hours of
Speaker 1: your morning routine, or your evening routine, or your daily
Speaker 1: routine down below. Extra points if they're interesting, but also
Speaker 1: just as many points if they're just play not because
Speaker 1: we can all get some inspiration from that. Make sure
Speaker 1: if you have someone who you know who might like
Speaker 1: this episode, that you send them a link. That is
Speaker 1: how it helps. This is how the show really grows
Speaker 1: and reaches new ears, reaches new audiences, reaches new people.
Speaker 1: Also follow us along on Instagram at that Psychology podcast.
Speaker 1: If you have further interesting questions, thoughts, feelings about this episode,
Speaker 1: or you want to just suggest a new episode, you
Speaker 1: can just shoot me a message. I do you know,
Speaker 1: infamously do a lot of episodes that are suggested by listeners,
Speaker 1: So if you want that to potentially be you, we'll
Speaker 1: see you over there, and until next time, stay safe,
Speaker 1: be kind, be gentle to yourself, and we will talk
Speaker 1: very very soon,