WEBVTT - Let’s Find This Girl A MAN! 0:00:14.200 --> 0:00:16.840 Hey, guys, it's Jana and I am back with my 0:00:16.920 --> 0:00:20.040 bestie Pam, and we are going to talk all things 0:00:20.120 --> 0:00:22.720 dating and how it's going. 0:00:22.600 --> 0:00:23.200 For my girl. 0:00:23.480 --> 0:00:26.159 All right, girl, let's dive back into our convo. So 0:00:26.760 --> 0:00:29.760 whenever I ever get someone that DMS me about them 0:00:29.800 --> 0:00:32.199 going through divorce, I'm so sad for them because I 0:00:32.240 --> 0:00:33.960 know the feeling and we know how awful it is. 0:00:33.960 --> 0:00:36.920 But I always end it with and I'm so excited 0:00:36.920 --> 0:00:39.640 for you because there's going to be a brighter version, 0:00:39.680 --> 0:00:42.320 a lighter version of yourself. You get to fall in 0:00:42.360 --> 0:00:47.120 love again, you get to receive what you really deserve 0:00:47.320 --> 0:00:49.720 and not settle for less. But that doesn't mean that 0:00:49.720 --> 0:00:52.360 it's not hard in the process. And that is what 0:00:53.120 --> 0:00:56.720 we continue on with this conversation, and you know, in 0:00:56.800 --> 0:00:59.400 our walks and our talks, and that's why you know, 0:00:59.400 --> 0:01:01.600 I'm excited talk to you about it because it is. 0:01:02.760 --> 0:01:06.720 Dating isn't easy, no, but it doesn't have to be 0:01:06.760 --> 0:01:10.200 horrible exactly. So I think there's the ebbs and the 0:01:10.200 --> 0:01:13.000 flows right, So for you now that you have because 0:01:13.000 --> 0:01:16.080 how many years now has it been too? Two years? 0:01:16.080 --> 0:01:20.480 So you're two years divorced. When do you think actually 0:01:20.520 --> 0:01:25.760 it's appropriate to start dating again. I never really follow timelines. Yeah, 0:01:26.120 --> 0:01:28.720 I think it's like a feeling thing. But well, I 0:01:28.760 --> 0:01:30.440 think you have to be honest with yourself. 0:01:30.520 --> 0:01:34.080 I think, you know, like are we dating to mask 0:01:34.280 --> 0:01:36.520 feelings and not processing things? 0:01:37.600 --> 0:01:40.240 You know? Or maybe you know. 0:01:41.600 --> 0:01:45.440 Somebody truly that you would really you know, like really 0:01:45.480 --> 0:01:47.280 want to be in a relationship just happened to come 0:01:47.319 --> 0:01:50.000 into your life at you know, maybe the two month mark. 0:01:50.040 --> 0:01:52.200 I mean, I don't think there's like I don't like 0:01:52.240 --> 0:01:57.760 to ever put timelines on it like that either. For me, 0:01:59.160 --> 0:02:01.800 I didn't even really think about it, like when I 0:02:01.880 --> 0:02:04.080 was getting divorced, and then like months and months after, 0:02:04.200 --> 0:02:05.760 I didn't even really. 0:02:07.080 --> 0:02:07.360 Again. 0:02:07.400 --> 0:02:10.360 I was just like so focused on my growing my 0:02:10.440 --> 0:02:15.920 company and my kids and traveling, like that's kind of 0:02:15.960 --> 0:02:18.480 that's what I did. I didn't jump into dating. I 0:02:18.560 --> 0:02:21.079 jumped into travel, right, that was my. 0:02:22.720 --> 0:02:23.600 That's what I did. 0:02:24.280 --> 0:02:28.560 And so I don't have an answer for that. For me, 0:02:28.960 --> 0:02:33.040 it was it was a while, I mean, my goodness, 0:02:34.880 --> 0:02:39.800 oh well eight months maybe or something. And it was 0:02:39.840 --> 0:02:44.959 because of you anyway that even prompted me to entertain anything, 0:02:45.280 --> 0:02:50.000 you know, So I probably wouldn't have like started until later. 0:02:50.480 --> 0:02:53.360 Well, I just because I think it's one of those things, 0:02:53.440 --> 0:02:55.280 like we said early on, it's it's a bit of 0:02:55.320 --> 0:02:58.760 a numbers game, but it's also go out there and 0:02:59.440 --> 0:03:03.840 feel the feelings of a big second. Like I when 0:03:03.880 --> 0:03:05.720 I started dating, I was like, oh wow, people think 0:03:05.800 --> 0:03:08.720 I'm actually I don't. Yeah, you know, I'm sure there's 0:03:08.800 --> 0:03:12.760 this well feeling you get post divorce. 0:03:12.919 --> 0:03:15.400 Yeah, I mean, and sometimes you do need like a 0:03:15.400 --> 0:03:17.920 stroke of your ego. I guess right after you know, 0:03:18.440 --> 0:03:24.959 kind of a long you know, marriage or whatever. And 0:03:26.360 --> 0:03:32.280 I whenever I did kind of start dating, I was 0:03:32.360 --> 0:03:35.600 ready sure, like I felt good about it. I felt, 0:03:35.760 --> 0:03:39.360 you know, just in a positive light. And I was 0:03:39.440 --> 0:03:45.520 excited because for me, the type of energy I'm going 0:03:45.560 --> 0:03:47.520 to put into something is exactly what I'm going to 0:03:47.600 --> 0:03:50.080 get out of it. So I am never going to 0:03:50.160 --> 0:03:51.520 be like this sucks. 0:03:51.640 --> 0:03:52.520 Men are awful. 0:03:52.760 --> 0:03:55.560 My gosh, dating like that will never come out of 0:03:55.600 --> 0:03:58.840 my mouth. I actually love it. I love men. I 0:03:58.880 --> 0:04:03.680 think they're amazing. I think that I am learning something 0:04:05.120 --> 0:04:09.440 about myself every time I talk to or go on 0:04:09.480 --> 0:04:11.520 a date with somebody, and that is what I take 0:04:11.640 --> 0:04:12.360 away from it. 0:04:12.880 --> 0:04:20.159 So I I think it's fun and we have some 0:04:20.279 --> 0:04:20.920 loaves with it. 0:04:22.160 --> 0:04:22.960 What are the lows? 0:04:23.000 --> 0:04:28.520 Do you think that I've said, I it's it's discouraging 0:04:29.120 --> 0:04:31.800 right at times, because it's. 0:04:32.400 --> 0:04:35.560 I mean, I don't know, is it so the last 0:04:35.640 --> 0:04:36.720 date maybe. 0:04:36.400 --> 0:04:39.960 Oh hey, but discouraging discouraging. I mean that was an 0:04:40.000 --> 0:04:43.920 amazing date, sure shot. So you did send me a 0:04:43.920 --> 0:04:48.640 text that was like, I'm like this sucks. Yeah, well okay, 0:04:48.640 --> 0:04:55.440 but let me explain this to everybody. So I have 0:04:55.640 --> 0:04:59.880 not had any type of bad experience at all. Okay, 0:05:00.240 --> 0:05:03.480 I feel like, you know, any man that I've talked 0:05:03.480 --> 0:05:04.839 to or have been on a date with. 0:05:04.839 --> 0:05:12.480 Or jumped off boats, I mean that one. Oh lord, Okay, 0:05:13.440 --> 0:05:19.080 moving on. So I I think I can, you know, 0:05:19.120 --> 0:05:21.919 sniff them out pretty good. So I've I've. 0:05:22.120 --> 0:05:26.720 Only I've only had really interesting men that like are 0:05:26.760 --> 0:05:30.479 doing really cool things and I'm super intrigued by. So 0:05:30.640 --> 0:05:33.960 that's been great to like see that you know, this 0:05:34.000 --> 0:05:36.440 whole different world out there, because when you're married for 0:05:36.520 --> 0:05:39.520 ten years, you know, you don't you're not exploring that 0:05:39.640 --> 0:05:43.520 you don't know. And so that's been a blessing for me. 0:05:43.800 --> 0:05:46.560 Is just like whoa, you know, like this is super refreshing. 0:05:46.600 --> 0:05:50.880 This this can be fun and just kind of evolving, 0:05:51.160 --> 0:05:55.120 you know, and learning from each one of them, the 0:05:55.160 --> 0:05:57.160 little things I want to take away from each one 0:05:57.200 --> 0:05:59.200 of them. I mean, you know, try to write, You're 0:05:59.240 --> 0:06:01.000 trying to piece them all together to find like this 0:06:01.120 --> 0:06:04.440 magic person. I think that's where I'm at that I 0:06:04.440 --> 0:06:08.120 haven't had anything bad. It's just hasn't been like. 0:06:09.640 --> 0:06:11.320 The but die. 0:06:11.920 --> 0:06:17.720 Do you have moments where you wonder if you'll ever 0:06:17.760 --> 0:06:18.440 find love again? 0:06:19.520 --> 0:06:23.680 No? No, m so you believe that you will one. 0:06:25.240 --> 0:06:28.200 And what is because there's times when we walk and 0:06:28.240 --> 0:06:30.040 you're like, I don't want to have I don't need 0:06:30.080 --> 0:06:32.880 to have. I don't need to get married again. I 0:06:32.920 --> 0:06:35.080 don't need So it's like, well that's true. 0:06:35.520 --> 0:06:36.200 I mean that's. 0:06:36.040 --> 0:06:38.520 Exactly though, because when you're like the other day you 0:06:38.640 --> 0:06:40.040 just said, but what do I want? 0:06:41.040 --> 0:06:41.240 Right? 0:06:41.440 --> 0:06:43.800 I mean, so what do you want? So here's the deal. 0:06:44.320 --> 0:06:52.920 I one thousand percent am so freaking happy in my life, 0:06:53.000 --> 0:06:54.279 Like I really. 0:06:54.200 --> 0:06:56.080 I could find a word for you. It's joyful. Feel 0:06:56.080 --> 0:06:58.360 like I hit the jackpot. I am. 0:06:58.480 --> 0:07:01.840 You know, I have this company that fills me with 0:07:01.880 --> 0:07:08.720 such joy and you know, inspiration, and that continues to grow. 0:07:08.760 --> 0:07:11.600 I have these beautiful children, I have the most amazing friendships. 0:07:11.680 --> 0:07:16.960 My family's so freaking great. You know, I get to travel, 0:07:17.120 --> 0:07:20.920 I get to have all of these beautiful experiences. So 0:07:21.000 --> 0:07:23.720 when I tell you I'm at a high, I'm really 0:07:23.800 --> 0:07:28.400 at a high. But that doesn't mean that I don't 0:07:28.400 --> 0:07:32.000 have space or that I don't necessarily want somebody to 0:07:32.080 --> 0:07:34.640 elevate me even higher, Like can I think? Do I 0:07:34.680 --> 0:07:37.880 think that I can be even that much happier with 0:07:38.840 --> 0:07:40.360 an amazing partner? 0:07:40.640 --> 0:07:41.200 I do? 0:07:42.000 --> 0:07:45.880 I want, I totally do, and I do want that. However, 0:07:46.520 --> 0:07:50.440 if it's not that I'm not doing it, I don't 0:07:50.520 --> 0:07:53.000 have to do it. I don't I don't need it. 0:07:53.120 --> 0:07:56.320 I want it, Yeah, but I really don't mean I'm 0:07:56.600 --> 0:08:00.720 I'm happy at my home on a Saturday night with 0:08:02.160 --> 0:08:03.360 music and the good book. 0:08:04.040 --> 0:08:04.240 Right. 0:08:14.760 --> 0:08:18.200 I think it's important too, because there's no point in 0:08:18.240 --> 0:08:23.880 settling when it like I would have never settled again, 0:08:24.040 --> 0:08:27.880 because what is the point I have too beautiful, I 0:08:27.920 --> 0:08:31.320 had two beautiful children. I would rather be alone than 0:08:31.400 --> 0:08:33.520 be in an unhappy marriage again, because we know how 0:08:33.520 --> 0:08:36.600 that feels to be in an unhappy marriage, and then 0:08:37.320 --> 0:08:40.280 why go through that again if it's not the right 0:08:40.400 --> 0:08:41.560 person I know? 0:08:41.679 --> 0:08:44.240 And that's just where I feel so powerful and so 0:08:44.679 --> 0:08:47.839 like honestly in control of it, and I just think 0:08:47.880 --> 0:08:53.400 there's something to be said about It's this combination of 0:08:53.800 --> 0:08:58.280 divorced mom energy and perimounopausal type of situation that. 0:08:58.360 --> 0:09:02.960 Is like the most powerful thing I've ever experienced in 0:09:03.000 --> 0:09:06.560 my life. It's it causes you to. 0:09:08.679 --> 0:09:12.040 Ask for what you want, not give a sh what 0:09:12.160 --> 0:09:16.959 people think, and just kind of you're coming into your 0:09:17.000 --> 0:09:22.079 own honestly, and it's the best place to be. If 0:09:22.120 --> 0:09:25.880 I could bottle it up and sell this feeling that 0:09:26.000 --> 0:09:26.600 I have. 0:09:26.679 --> 0:09:28.559 Right now, it would be billionaires. 0:09:29.840 --> 0:09:34.200 What is your biggest when you now that you're in 0:09:34.240 --> 0:09:38.200 the dating world again? What is what do you love 0:09:38.240 --> 0:09:41.880 the most about it and what defeats you from it? 0:09:42.480 --> 0:09:47.000 Well? Is it that it's Rayahs the worst? Or no? 0:09:47.840 --> 0:09:50.480 I mean, oh my gosh it on that one. Yes, 0:09:50.559 --> 0:09:50.880 you did. 0:09:51.040 --> 0:09:55.880 And that's all that I've between, you know, friends introducing 0:09:55.880 --> 0:09:58.240 me to people and Raya And that's really all there is. 0:09:58.280 --> 0:10:00.560 I don't go out much, so I'm not meet somebody 0:10:00.600 --> 0:10:04.480 you know at a bar, so I think that's the 0:10:04.559 --> 0:10:08.040 thing right where. Okay, So now you're a mom, you 0:10:08.040 --> 0:10:10.040 know you're trying to run this you know, house by 0:10:10.080 --> 0:10:14.040 yourself and you're you know, working and doing all the things. 0:10:16.640 --> 0:10:20.640 It's challenging to find the time to put forth you know, 0:10:20.720 --> 0:10:24.600 the effort. So I think that's that's really hard. So 0:10:24.640 --> 0:10:27.240 that's what's discouraging a little bit, because we can just 0:10:27.240 --> 0:10:29.280 talk about what happened. I'm like, all right, when's your 0:10:29.320 --> 0:10:32.400 second day? You're like, I've got a volleyball game here, 0:10:32.440 --> 0:10:34.400 a softball game there, and then I got the kids 0:10:34.400 --> 0:10:36.760 and then it's just like and then my business and 0:10:36.800 --> 0:10:40.960 it's like when you know, it's so that is super 0:10:41.040 --> 0:10:43.680 challenging and it's definitely a thing. But I have to 0:10:43.760 --> 0:10:48.840 believe that there are men out there with the exact 0:10:48.880 --> 0:10:50.120 same problem as me. 0:10:50.880 --> 0:10:55.199 And are you know, willing to maybe be. 0:10:55.320 --> 0:10:59.360 A little bit like non traditional in their approach to 0:11:00.679 --> 0:11:02.960 I do Part two right right? 0:11:03.880 --> 0:11:07.320 What has been like? What gives you the most eck 0:11:07.440 --> 0:11:15.679 on a date? Oh? Lord? Dating in your forties? What 0:11:15.840 --> 0:11:16.840 is the eckiest thing? 0:11:17.960 --> 0:11:18.160 You know? 0:11:18.280 --> 0:11:20.719 The funny thing about x or is that they can 0:11:20.840 --> 0:11:23.120 just come out of nowhere. I mean you are like, 0:11:23.280 --> 0:11:27.120 whoa what? I was totally. 0:11:26.840 --> 0:11:30.320 Vibing with you and you said one thing and I'm done. 0:11:30.360 --> 0:11:31.280 I'm out, Like. 0:11:31.440 --> 0:11:35.320 You said, you like it all inclusive, and I'm auty 0:11:35.320 --> 0:11:36.880 five hundred. 0:11:37.800 --> 0:11:39.440 It can happen that quick, and. 0:11:39.400 --> 0:11:43.960 So's it's a scary place sometimes because you're like, whoa 0:11:44.760 --> 0:11:47.239 where I'm like, from girl, I love it all inclusive. 0:11:47.400 --> 0:11:48.000 Let's do that. 0:11:49.200 --> 0:11:56.000 I am such a detailed, curated, experiential person, Like if 0:11:56.040 --> 0:11:59.800 I'm leaving my house and I'm traveling, it's going to 0:11:59.840 --> 0:12:05.760 be perfectly curated. And yeah, boutiky. But anyway, we digressed. 0:12:05.880 --> 0:12:07.920 Yes, So the biggest. 0:12:07.520 --> 0:12:13.880 Ick, Oh, I have a couple actually, so listen up. 0:12:14.040 --> 0:12:18.680 Dudes getting drunk are having more than like two glasses 0:12:18.720 --> 0:12:21.280 of wine or a cocktail. I mean, I remember I 0:12:21.320 --> 0:12:23.400 was on a date and we were I was there 0:12:23.520 --> 0:12:26.120 for fifty minutes because I couldn't stand the guy once 0:12:26.160 --> 0:12:28.679 I got there, and so I was, you know, trying 0:12:28.720 --> 0:12:32.400 to kind of like move it fast, and in fifty 0:12:32.480 --> 0:12:36.360 minutes he had three cocktails on a Tuesday night. 0:12:37.200 --> 0:12:39.080 It's just I'm just not about that. 0:12:39.160 --> 0:12:43.280 I don't like it. It's a total ick to me. Yeah, 0:12:43.360 --> 0:12:46.480 like just getting drunk in general at this age. You know, 0:12:46.559 --> 0:12:50.720 I'm forty six years old, I'm you know, dating my 0:12:50.840 --> 0:12:54.319 age or older. I just it's just not something that 0:12:54.440 --> 0:12:57.760 I want to be in that environment. Totally cool if 0:12:57.800 --> 0:12:59.400 you do and that's what you love to do in 0:12:59.400 --> 0:13:02.200 your spare time, it's not. I mean, well, I enjoy 0:13:02.320 --> 0:13:05.280 like a you know, amazing glass of wine with somebody 0:13:05.320 --> 0:13:09.160 on a date, of course, but I don't like if 0:13:09.200 --> 0:13:13.240 alcohol is the driving force, yeah, or like their identity 0:13:13.280 --> 0:13:15.640 or something that has to be done all the time. 0:13:15.720 --> 0:13:20.640 I just do not like that. Is there height requirements? Oh? 0:13:20.840 --> 0:13:23.559 I feel so bad when I say stuff because it's just. 0:13:23.640 --> 0:13:26.719 You know, I do know, I mean, I definitely do, 0:13:26.760 --> 0:13:28.720 but I hate to hate to say it aloud. 0:13:29.320 --> 0:13:32.080 I think. I just think there's so many you know, 0:13:34.800 --> 0:13:35.240 I think. 0:13:35.160 --> 0:13:39.959 If you're gonna be again, you know, picking the one, 0:13:40.280 --> 0:13:44.320 it's I never liked dating shorter guys, and I couldn't. 0:13:44.360 --> 0:13:44.840 I tried. 0:13:45.480 --> 0:13:49.520 I totally tried, but I just I like a dude 0:13:49.559 --> 0:13:51.719 that's taller than me and I'm five four, so that's 0:13:51.800 --> 0:13:53.880 really not asking for a lot. But I did try, 0:13:54.080 --> 0:13:58.000 and someone was like he was like maybe maybe five four, 0:13:59.160 --> 0:14:00.920 maybe five five, five five, And I was like, I 0:14:00.960 --> 0:14:01.520 just can't. 0:14:01.280 --> 0:14:05.360 Do it, right. So I think though at this point, 0:14:06.559 --> 0:14:08.560 maybe that makes me shallow. No, I don't know, not 0:14:08.679 --> 0:14:08.920 at all. 0:14:08.960 --> 0:14:11.120 I mean my whole life, I've you know, it's been 0:14:11.600 --> 0:14:17.680 very tall men. But what I am learning, and. 0:14:17.559 --> 0:14:20.040 This is a this is a process. 0:14:20.360 --> 0:14:23.200 I mean I am learning what gets me going and 0:14:23.200 --> 0:14:25.280 what I like and you know, the type of feeling 0:14:25.320 --> 0:14:25.720 I want. 0:14:25.760 --> 0:14:26.120 And so. 0:14:30.800 --> 0:14:37.400 I think there's a world where I could totally you know, 0:14:39.640 --> 0:14:42.440 fall for somebody if they weren't you know, so tall, 0:14:42.520 --> 0:14:45.120 if like I had this amazing feeling and it was 0:14:45.160 --> 0:14:47.800 like supportive and there was beautiful communication, and you know 0:14:47.880 --> 0:14:50.600 I was attracted to you. I think it all comes 0:14:50.600 --> 0:14:58.280 down to attraction really, so but typically you know, I've 0:14:58.360 --> 0:15:02.040 dated like six foot and above. Yeah, just if we 0:15:02.040 --> 0:15:07.520 were going off of charts of past relationships. I mean 0:15:07.560 --> 0:15:10.040 my ex husband was actually the smallest, I mean the smallest, 0:15:10.080 --> 0:15:11.640 the shortest person that I ever. 0:15:12.520 --> 0:15:13.840 He was six foot right. 0:15:14.200 --> 0:15:15.760 And again I think if as long as you have 0:15:15.840 --> 0:15:19.520 that attraction, yeah, it's the attraction for me, you know that, 0:15:20.960 --> 0:15:24.040 And I'd like to wear like a small hell yeah, no, 0:15:24.280 --> 0:15:27.160 I do people make it work. I mean there's I 0:15:27.600 --> 0:15:30.200 totally for our name, but I follow her on socials. 0:15:30.240 --> 0:15:33.240 I mean she's taller than her husband, you know, but again, 0:15:33.400 --> 0:15:35.280 they're attracted to each other and it's not. 0:15:35.720 --> 0:15:37.400 Yeah, I don't think any of it. It's like a 0:15:37.400 --> 0:15:38.200 hard no for me. 0:15:38.200 --> 0:15:51.400 Sure you mention older, like dating guys your age and 0:15:51.400 --> 0:15:52.840 then older, would you ever go younger? 0:15:54.280 --> 0:15:54.680 Everybody? 0:15:54.840 --> 0:15:57.680 You are quite the cougar whom I you could be. Well, 0:15:57.760 --> 0:16:00.960 everybody always asks me that, and they certainly are. 0:16:02.280 --> 0:16:04.000 They love Pam. Yeah. 0:16:04.240 --> 0:16:07.640 The younger are bold. I mean they are bold. They 0:16:07.680 --> 0:16:11.040 are communicative, which I totally appreciate. I do love a 0:16:11.080 --> 0:16:18.880 good bold, you know, subtle, swaggy type of person. But 0:16:18.960 --> 0:16:24.240 I never dated younger ever, And I just I don't 0:16:24.280 --> 0:16:26.440 know why. I think maybe there's a couple like things 0:16:26.440 --> 0:16:28.960 that are happening in my brain where I'm like, they 0:16:29.000 --> 0:16:30.200 want kids? 0:16:31.240 --> 0:16:36.400 The kid train is l Yeah, so you've got two. 0:16:36.360 --> 0:16:38.920 Kids, two kids, right, so but you know, I'm like, 0:16:38.960 --> 0:16:41.200 you know, do they want a child of their own? 0:16:41.240 --> 0:16:43.120 And then I kind of would feel, you know, like 0:16:43.280 --> 0:16:47.000 guilty about that. So I think there's a little bit 0:16:47.000 --> 0:16:52.720 of that. And I've just I really like an older sophistication. 0:16:55.280 --> 0:16:59.440 But I am telling you these younger men coming up, 0:16:59.520 --> 0:17:03.800 I mean they have some tools like with communication and 0:17:03.880 --> 0:17:07.760 awareness and evolving and you know, really kind of like 0:17:07.880 --> 0:17:14.440 tuning into a woman that is admirable and exciting, and so. 0:17:15.880 --> 0:17:16.400 I just. 0:17:18.040 --> 0:17:21.240 Really haven't gone there yet because I really do. I'm 0:17:21.280 --> 0:17:24.400 super intentional, and I probably think too much. 0:17:25.280 --> 0:17:27.800 Do you want to get married again? I don't know 0:17:27.840 --> 0:17:29.000 if I have to get married. 0:17:29.440 --> 0:17:33.040 I mean I am open to you know that, But 0:17:33.200 --> 0:17:37.879 I don't think that it's something that is like on 0:17:37.960 --> 0:17:41.199 the top of my of my list of feeling like 0:17:41.320 --> 0:17:44.240 I've found the one in order, you know, to marry them, 0:17:44.240 --> 0:17:44.600 Like I don't. 0:17:44.600 --> 0:17:47.679 I don't have to do that. Do I want like this. 0:17:47.760 --> 0:17:53.040 Beautiful, long term, monogamous, exceptional relationship? Yes? 0:17:54.240 --> 0:17:56.480 Right, And listen, dudes, they don't have You don't have 0:17:56.560 --> 0:17:59.800 to live here in Nashville like she's she loves traveling. 0:18:00.680 --> 0:18:01.640 No, I've never. 0:18:03.080 --> 0:18:14.760 Like seriously dated anybody in Nashville. I actually maybe prefer not. 0:18:11.040 --> 0:18:14.359 Nothing wrong with that. Would you sign a brain up 0:18:14.400 --> 0:18:17.760 if you did get married? Yeah? 0:18:18.080 --> 0:18:19.959 I feel like at our age, it's like, yeah, I 0:18:20.000 --> 0:18:24.080 have my I'm good. Talk to us about your business. 0:18:24.600 --> 0:18:32.400 Okay, Well, I have a health and wellness coaching company 0:18:32.520 --> 0:18:37.840 that is global. It can reach anybody because it is. 0:18:39.520 --> 0:18:39.960 Virtual. 0:18:40.720 --> 0:18:43.720 I have my own app, and I am really focused 0:18:43.760 --> 0:18:50.280 on transforming women's bodies minds and spirits really in the 0:18:50.320 --> 0:18:54.520 forty plus h group through weight training and nutrition and 0:18:54.800 --> 0:19:00.800 you know, got health and mindset and I am I 0:19:00.800 --> 0:19:03.240 mean I could cry thinking about how grateful I am 0:19:03.320 --> 0:19:05.359 that I'm in this space, that I was able to 0:19:05.400 --> 0:19:08.040 develop this company and grow it to where it is 0:19:08.160 --> 0:19:12.040 and now, you know, just continue to scale it. I 0:19:12.040 --> 0:19:14.800 don't know what I would have done without it. 0:19:15.960 --> 0:19:18.920 Yeah, I mean it was and hey, I went through 0:19:18.920 --> 0:19:21.600 the program. It's a great program. Helped me get my 0:19:21.680 --> 0:19:25.320 body back from yeah, from pregnancy or you know, from 0:19:25.320 --> 0:19:28.440 being pregnant and everything. So but also what I learned 0:19:28.440 --> 0:19:29.720 too about foods. 0:19:29.359 --> 0:19:30.800 And sure and an education. 0:19:31.000 --> 0:19:31.160 Yeah. 0:19:31.200 --> 0:19:34.679 And I think for you too, moving into your dating world, 0:19:34.760 --> 0:19:39.800 you need a man that supports your drive, lets you 0:19:39.920 --> 0:19:42.840 shine there because I don't know if you've had that. 0:19:43.560 --> 0:19:47.240 And then also that takes care of themselves, like you said, 0:19:47.840 --> 0:19:51.840 not drinking so much. Like you want someone that takes 0:19:51.880 --> 0:19:52.479 care of themselves. 0:19:52.520 --> 0:19:55.439 Well, I just want them to first and foremost, like 0:19:55.680 --> 0:20:00.840 acknowledge the importance of being you know, fit in their body, 0:20:00.920 --> 0:20:03.239 mind and spirit. I mean, you know, you don't have 0:20:03.320 --> 0:20:07.359 to be you know, some big buff guy you know 0:20:07.440 --> 0:20:09.720 at all. And I'm not even really into that, but 0:20:12.040 --> 0:20:16.600 I just yeah, I love the awareness and in people 0:20:16.640 --> 0:20:19.639 having like the understanding of why that's so important and 0:20:19.640 --> 0:20:22.560 how it's going to help with longevity and just making 0:20:22.600 --> 0:20:25.520 your life, Like living your life as optimally as possible 0:20:25.640 --> 0:20:27.439 is really my message, Like we don't want to just 0:20:27.480 --> 0:20:30.320 feel okay, we wouldn't feel freaking amazing. And I want 0:20:30.320 --> 0:20:32.920 somebody to be on that journey with me so that 0:20:33.200 --> 0:20:36.760 when we're seventy eighty, like we can still be traveling 0:20:36.760 --> 0:20:38.040 through Europe together. 0:20:39.080 --> 0:20:42.400 Speaking of traveling through Europe, what is your hope on 0:20:42.440 --> 0:20:45.040 this dating journey? Like, if you could go this is 0:20:46.000 --> 0:20:48.359 this is what I'd love to see in the end. 0:20:48.400 --> 0:20:49.439 I know you don't know if you want to get 0:20:49.440 --> 0:20:51.960 married or not, but because I feel like travel obviously 0:20:52.040 --> 0:20:53.679 is a huge piece of that. So you want someone 0:20:53.720 --> 0:20:56.360 that can be worldly, can go travel with you? 0:20:57.080 --> 0:20:58.080 Yes, I. 0:21:00.119 --> 0:21:02.600 You know, for me right now like what I visualize 0:21:02.600 --> 0:21:07.000 and I'm open to different things, but for me currently 0:21:07.080 --> 0:21:09.439 like what I'm capable of. Right we talk about what 0:21:09.520 --> 0:21:12.880 everybody else is capable, well cable, but what I'm capable 0:21:12.960 --> 0:21:17.320 of is maybe something that doesn't look so cut and dry, 0:21:17.640 --> 0:21:21.520 like you know, people are used to where there can 0:21:21.560 --> 0:21:25.080 be a beautiful relationship that doesn't have to be so 0:21:25.520 --> 0:21:30.040 like in the same city. And so maybe like twenty 0:21:30.080 --> 0:21:33.280 four to seven right where it can be where we 0:21:33.320 --> 0:21:36.400 meet and we travel together and we support each other 0:21:36.480 --> 0:21:38.480 and we can see each other like you know, when 0:21:38.480 --> 0:21:41.359 we don't have our kids or whatever like timing that 0:21:41.440 --> 0:21:44.719 looks like because that's the reality with co parenting. I 0:21:44.760 --> 0:21:47.439 can't change that. You know, they have to be with 0:21:47.480 --> 0:21:48.960 their dad. They want to be with their dad, he 0:21:49.000 --> 0:21:51.720 wants to be with them. And then I have space to, 0:21:52.720 --> 0:21:55.320 you know, either focus on my company or travel or 0:21:55.359 --> 0:21:56.439 do whatever I want to do. 0:21:56.480 --> 0:21:58.000 And I take full advantage of that. 0:21:58.840 --> 0:22:01.680 And so I think there's a world where it could 0:22:01.760 --> 0:22:08.400 be this amazing like non traditional view of partnership where 0:22:08.560 --> 0:22:10.640 I don't have to live in the same home as 0:22:10.680 --> 0:22:14.159 you twenty four to seven. I mean, could that overlap 0:22:14.280 --> 0:22:18.359 and would that be cool? Absolutely? But I don't think that, 0:22:18.760 --> 0:22:23.120 you know, it has to be so. 0:22:21.520 --> 0:22:22.439 So full on. 0:22:23.119 --> 0:22:26.240 Yeah, And I too, like for the you know, for 0:22:26.440 --> 0:22:29.000 people that are dating and I just did this little 0:22:29.040 --> 0:22:30.680 Google search here and I'm going to read in the 0:22:30.720 --> 0:22:34.159 sec but not to be discouraged because a lot of 0:22:34.160 --> 0:22:37.040 people are like, oh, this, you know, natural sucks for 0:22:37.119 --> 0:22:39.360 men or it's so hard. There's not men here and 0:22:39.440 --> 0:22:43.840 there are roughly google four billion men on Earth, slightly 0:22:43.840 --> 0:22:46.359 more than half of the planet's total population. So four 0:22:46.600 --> 0:22:47.200 billion men. 0:22:47.280 --> 0:22:50.800 Oh yeah, I think. And again I met my husband. 0:22:51.200 --> 0:22:55.320 He's was overseas, different different country, and so it's like 0:22:56.040 --> 0:22:59.720 the reality of your soulmate being in your same state. 0:23:00.400 --> 0:23:02.720 I'm like, you can go to any state. Yeah, And 0:23:02.760 --> 0:23:05.400 I know it's hard, right, So it's I love it. 0:23:05.520 --> 0:23:08.840 But it's like, maybe change your Googles or your dating 0:23:09.520 --> 0:23:11.040