1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:02,000 Speaker 1: Buggle up and hold on tight. We got it for 2 00:00:02,120 --> 00:00:05,120 Speaker 1: you here. It is the Strawberry Letter subject if I 3 00:00:05,240 --> 00:00:09,039 Speaker 1: kid roses one more time, Dear Stephen Shirley. I am 4 00:00:09,080 --> 00:00:11,879 Speaker 1: a wife and a mother with a great career. I 5 00:00:11,920 --> 00:00:14,080 Speaker 1: love my husband. He is the best friend. He is 6 00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:17,680 Speaker 1: my best friend and an amazing father. But sometimes I 7 00:00:17,680 --> 00:00:20,759 Speaker 1: feel like he doesn't value me. Before we got married, 8 00:00:20,960 --> 00:00:23,720 Speaker 1: I knew he wasn't very romantic and he didn't pay 9 00:00:23,760 --> 00:00:27,319 Speaker 1: attention to details. Over the years, I realized that he 10 00:00:27,400 --> 00:00:30,640 Speaker 1: does not get me. For example, I have never liked 11 00:00:30,720 --> 00:00:34,479 Speaker 1: red roses and he knows it. But throughout our marriage, 12 00:00:34,479 --> 00:00:39,159 Speaker 1: for every occasion, I get red roses. I've never complained 13 00:00:39,200 --> 00:00:42,080 Speaker 1: about the roses because I feel like it's better than nothing, 14 00:00:42,600 --> 00:00:45,639 Speaker 1: and I've told him my favorite flowers are Lily's. When 15 00:00:45,640 --> 00:00:48,200 Speaker 1: he brought me my engagement ring, he got the ring 16 00:00:48,360 --> 00:00:51,440 Speaker 1: that best fit his budget and not the one I wanted. 17 00:00:51,720 --> 00:00:54,960 Speaker 1: When we have sex, if anything new or exciting happened, 18 00:00:55,200 --> 00:00:58,120 Speaker 1: I am always the one to initiate it. I've always 19 00:00:58,160 --> 00:01:00,640 Speaker 1: had a high sex drive and I told him, but 20 00:01:00,720 --> 00:01:04,520 Speaker 1: I guess he thinks I've changed. I've never denied him sex, 21 00:01:04,600 --> 00:01:08,360 Speaker 1: even though I only enjoy it. Occasionally, he seems bored 22 00:01:08,400 --> 00:01:10,600 Speaker 1: a lot during sex, and it takes the joy out 23 00:01:10,640 --> 00:01:13,319 Speaker 1: of it for me. I am I am attractive, and 24 00:01:13,400 --> 00:01:16,360 Speaker 1: men notice me when I'm out. I don't play into 25 00:01:16,440 --> 00:01:19,320 Speaker 1: it because I have no desire to cheat on my husband, 26 00:01:19,480 --> 00:01:22,040 Speaker 1: but it feels good when other men notice me. I 27 00:01:22,080 --> 00:01:24,960 Speaker 1: want my husband to enjoy spending time with me. I've 28 00:01:25,000 --> 00:01:27,760 Speaker 1: talked to him about his attitude towards me, but he 29 00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:32,040 Speaker 1: still falls short. But if I get red roses one 30 00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:34,960 Speaker 1: more time, I'm going to flip out. What can I 31 00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:38,440 Speaker 1: do to make my situation better? Please help me? Well, 32 00:01:38,640 --> 00:01:42,479 Speaker 1: the letter isn't just about getting red roses. It's about 33 00:01:42,520 --> 00:01:44,640 Speaker 1: a lot of things, which you kind of made it 34 00:01:44,680 --> 00:01:48,560 Speaker 1: about red roses. It's about your husband not being very romantic. 35 00:01:48,880 --> 00:01:52,080 Speaker 1: It's about your husband not listening to you. It's about 36 00:01:52,120 --> 00:01:56,200 Speaker 1: your husband not paying attention to the details like you say, uh. 37 00:01:56,240 --> 00:01:59,080 Speaker 1: It's about you not being happy in the bedroom when 38 00:01:59,080 --> 00:02:02,000 Speaker 1: you guys are intimate. And it's about a whole lot 39 00:02:02,040 --> 00:02:04,440 Speaker 1: of stuff in this letter. But you put it on 40 00:02:04,480 --> 00:02:06,560 Speaker 1: the rare roses I mean, and that could be the 41 00:02:06,640 --> 00:02:09,200 Speaker 1: catalyst for all the for all this stuff. You know, 42 00:02:09,240 --> 00:02:11,400 Speaker 1: if he listened to you about the red roses. Maybe 43 00:02:11,400 --> 00:02:13,560 Speaker 1: he would listen to you about other things. It just 44 00:02:13,639 --> 00:02:16,440 Speaker 1: sounds like, you know, he's not listening to you, and 45 00:02:16,480 --> 00:02:18,440 Speaker 1: the way you make a sound, he just does whatever 46 00:02:18,680 --> 00:02:21,480 Speaker 1: he wants to do. You also through and here and 47 00:02:21,520 --> 00:02:24,160 Speaker 1: here about your attractive to other men, and you don't 48 00:02:24,200 --> 00:02:26,480 Speaker 1: want to cheat on your husband. So that's going through 49 00:02:26,520 --> 00:02:30,400 Speaker 1: your mind. But um, because you said you feel good 50 00:02:30,440 --> 00:02:33,000 Speaker 1: when other men notice you. You want your husband to 51 00:02:33,120 --> 00:02:35,640 Speaker 1: enjoy spending time with you. It doesn't sound like he 52 00:02:35,680 --> 00:02:39,480 Speaker 1: doesn't enjoy spending time with you. It just sounds like 53 00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:43,760 Speaker 1: you guys have some communication issues going on here because 54 00:02:43,800 --> 00:02:47,040 Speaker 1: you tell him one thing, he doesn't listen. Uh you know, 55 00:02:47,200 --> 00:02:50,560 Speaker 1: I mean he is he does at least by you roses. 56 00:02:50,919 --> 00:02:53,000 Speaker 1: So if you tell him you like lilies, have you 57 00:02:53,040 --> 00:02:55,079 Speaker 1: shown him the kind of lilies you like? Have you 58 00:02:55,400 --> 00:02:58,080 Speaker 1: taken the time to tell him, Okay, I don't like these, honey, Well, 59 00:02:58,120 --> 00:03:01,040 Speaker 1: why don't we flip it up? You know, up anything 60 00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:03,960 Speaker 1: new and exciting in the bedroom. You have to initiate it. 61 00:03:04,040 --> 00:03:07,000 Speaker 1: So it just sounds like everything is a problem, not 62 00:03:07,040 --> 00:03:09,400 Speaker 1: just the red roses. I think you guys need to 63 00:03:09,400 --> 00:03:13,240 Speaker 1: sit down and have a serious conversation because he's not listening. 64 00:03:13,320 --> 00:03:17,600 Speaker 1: You're not getting through communication. I think is your main problem, Steve. 65 00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:22,320 Speaker 1: Here's the problem in this letter. It's very, very simple, 66 00:03:22,680 --> 00:03:25,280 Speaker 1: and you said it at the outset, which made me 67 00:03:25,320 --> 00:03:29,359 Speaker 1: not understand the rest of the letter. I feel like 68 00:03:29,680 --> 00:03:36,560 Speaker 1: he doesn't value me. Before we got married, I knew 69 00:03:36,920 --> 00:03:42,880 Speaker 1: he wasn't very romantic and he didn't pay attention to details. 70 00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:49,280 Speaker 1: You knew it. You he showed this to you before 71 00:03:49,320 --> 00:03:51,840 Speaker 1: you got me. He didn't turn into this dude. He 72 00:03:52,120 --> 00:03:58,720 Speaker 1: was that dude. You married him anyway, faking You could 73 00:03:58,800 --> 00:04:02,720 Speaker 1: change him, probably like so many women do. But like 74 00:04:02,760 --> 00:04:05,040 Speaker 1: the minister told me, one thing, the only thing that 75 00:04:05,120 --> 00:04:07,440 Speaker 1: changes the day after you get married is the appearance 76 00:04:07,440 --> 00:04:11,000 Speaker 1: of your left hand third finger. Now he is the 77 00:04:11,040 --> 00:04:13,400 Speaker 1: exact same thing that he has being over the years. 78 00:04:13,400 --> 00:04:19,040 Speaker 1: I realized he does not pay attention to details. For example, 79 00:04:19,160 --> 00:04:22,760 Speaker 1: I have never liked wrote red roses, and he knows it. Yeah, 80 00:04:22,800 --> 00:04:25,839 Speaker 1: but your problem is he do he liked red roses. 81 00:04:27,880 --> 00:04:31,640 Speaker 1: Red roses do something to him. He loved red roses. 82 00:04:33,279 --> 00:04:38,000 Speaker 1: I always dreamed of giving a woman red roses. That's 83 00:04:38,200 --> 00:04:43,800 Speaker 1: in his mind. So you're gonna get these damn red rolls. Hell, 84 00:04:43,920 --> 00:04:48,760 Speaker 1: you don't who don't like red roses? They everywhere they're 85 00:04:48,800 --> 00:04:55,760 Speaker 1: on the parade route. But throughout our marriage, for every occasion, 86 00:04:56,720 --> 00:05:04,360 Speaker 1: I get red roses because he liked red rose and 87 00:05:04,440 --> 00:05:07,320 Speaker 1: he didn't decide a long time ago. This ain't about you, 88 00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:12,680 Speaker 1: just about him. I've never complained about the roses because 89 00:05:12,800 --> 00:05:16,000 Speaker 1: I feel like it's better than nothing. You got to 90 00:05:16,120 --> 00:05:21,160 Speaker 1: say something. You can't be married to a fool like 91 00:05:21,279 --> 00:05:26,680 Speaker 1: this and then don't tell him here fool. I'm sure 92 00:05:27,040 --> 00:05:30,440 Speaker 1: Ms Miles tells Tommy all the time, you're a fool. 93 00:05:30,600 --> 00:05:34,400 Speaker 1: What the hell? What the he? What are we doing? No, 94 00:05:34,520 --> 00:05:37,920 Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure she says that to him, Tommy, you're 95 00:05:37,920 --> 00:05:46,839 Speaker 1: a fool, because she no. Really well, I'm just saying, 96 00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:50,240 Speaker 1: if you're married to a fool, you don't never tell 97 00:05:50,320 --> 00:05:53,640 Speaker 1: him that. You don't think Madrede has said to me, 98 00:05:54,839 --> 00:05:57,880 Speaker 1: why is your ass so crazy? You don't think she 99 00:05:57,960 --> 00:06:01,880 Speaker 1: said that to me? Oh many times? You don't think 100 00:06:01,920 --> 00:06:04,680 Speaker 1: one of Jay's x Y has ever said to him 101 00:06:05,440 --> 00:06:07,800 Speaker 1: black hands don't need to be mad. I don't think 102 00:06:07,839 --> 00:06:12,440 Speaker 1: they said that, all right, Listen, you know what they 103 00:06:12,480 --> 00:06:17,240 Speaker 1: wanted Junior's girlfriends. They said, you're sick again, Part two 104 00:06:17,360 --> 00:06:20,560 Speaker 1: of your response to Today's This Woman. If I get 105 00:06:20,680 --> 00:06:23,760 Speaker 1: roses one more time? You're married a man that don't 106 00:06:23,760 --> 00:06:27,160 Speaker 1: pay attention to detail. You know you're sitting up in 107 00:06:27,160 --> 00:06:30,480 Speaker 1: here your mad cause he didn't bought you roses. Now, 108 00:06:30,520 --> 00:06:32,960 Speaker 1: I know Sherley was saying, you know how many women 109 00:06:33,000 --> 00:06:36,559 Speaker 1: don't get nothing? Well, hell, if you're getting what you won't, 110 00:06:37,120 --> 00:06:39,080 Speaker 1: it's if you're getting what you don't won't. Ain't that 111 00:06:39,160 --> 00:06:43,800 Speaker 1: the same thing as nothing? Hell? Yeah, you might will 112 00:06:43,839 --> 00:06:45,800 Speaker 1: not get me on fowers. I hate the damn flowers. 113 00:06:45,839 --> 00:06:49,880 Speaker 1: They thank to me. He coming in every the red roses. Now, 114 00:06:51,120 --> 00:06:54,680 Speaker 1: she's never like red roses. She's never complained about the 115 00:06:54,800 --> 00:06:57,560 Speaker 1: roses because I feel like it's better than nothing. Well, 116 00:06:57,600 --> 00:07:01,560 Speaker 1: you should have complained. I've totally my favorite flowers or lilies. 117 00:07:01,839 --> 00:07:03,680 Speaker 1: He may not even know what it, Lily said, and 118 00:07:03,760 --> 00:07:06,159 Speaker 1: surely said it best take by the flowers and showing 119 00:07:06,240 --> 00:07:13,480 Speaker 1: what you like. You're married to an ignorant person. When 120 00:07:13,520 --> 00:07:16,600 Speaker 1: he bought my engagement ring, he got me the ring 121 00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:20,080 Speaker 1: that best fit the budget and not the one I wanted. 122 00:07:22,640 --> 00:07:25,600 Speaker 1: When we have sex, if it's anything new or exciting 123 00:07:25,640 --> 00:07:31,120 Speaker 1: to happen, I'm always want to initiate it. I've always 124 00:07:31,120 --> 00:07:33,000 Speaker 1: had a high sex drive, and I told him, But 125 00:07:33,040 --> 00:07:36,080 Speaker 1: I guess he thinks I've changed. I've never denied him sex, 126 00:07:36,320 --> 00:07:39,840 Speaker 1: even though I only joined occasionally. Oh so now he 127 00:07:39,880 --> 00:07:44,400 Speaker 1: ain't bringing it. See, there was really wrong we go now. 128 00:07:44,480 --> 00:07:46,280 Speaker 1: I didn't notice this in a letter until I just 129 00:07:46,360 --> 00:07:48,720 Speaker 1: read it. Not all is you coming in here with 130 00:07:48,800 --> 00:07:53,080 Speaker 1: the wrong damn roses, the wrong flowers. You brought me 131 00:07:53,160 --> 00:07:55,480 Speaker 1: a ring out in Like I told you, I had 132 00:07:55,520 --> 00:08:00,640 Speaker 1: a high sex drive. Now you in here and you 133 00:08:00,680 --> 00:08:03,800 Speaker 1: ain't in here frying this bacon the way I like 134 00:08:03,960 --> 00:08:10,600 Speaker 1: getting it fried. I like my bacon well done. You 135 00:08:10,720 --> 00:08:13,360 Speaker 1: in here leaving with all these raw edges on this bacon. 136 00:08:13,720 --> 00:08:17,760 Speaker 1: I like my bacon extra crispy. And your asses in 137 00:08:17,960 --> 00:08:24,120 Speaker 1: here that is second microwaving this baby. I don't wan't know, 138 00:08:24,280 --> 00:08:29,720 Speaker 1: Steve Harvey, easy bacon. I want my bacon fried on 139 00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:33,680 Speaker 1: both sides. Long time. You can fry my bacon in 140 00:08:33,760 --> 00:08:35,920 Speaker 1: two minutes. Two minutes. Ain't gonna cut it in him, 141 00:08:37,320 --> 00:08:39,679 Speaker 1: That's what's wrong. Ain't got a damn thing, dude with fly. 142 00:08:40,400 --> 00:08:44,360 Speaker 1: Everything is wrong. He seems bored a lot during sex, 143 00:08:44,400 --> 00:08:47,240 Speaker 1: and it takes the joy out of he bored. He 144 00:08:47,520 --> 00:08:52,240 Speaker 1: bored because he ain't doing nothing. I ain't ever board. 145 00:08:52,440 --> 00:08:58,000 Speaker 1: You know why, because I'm in here with tricks. Because 146 00:08:58,000 --> 00:09:00,120 Speaker 1: tricks ain't for kids, not in this and not the 147 00:09:00,200 --> 00:09:04,040 Speaker 1: dead room. Now, ri tricks chick down. It ain't rubbing 148 00:09:04,080 --> 00:09:09,760 Speaker 1: in hire. Rick is for grown up And I got 149 00:09:09,840 --> 00:09:15,000 Speaker 1: plenty that's around. I had you in here doing things 150 00:09:15,040 --> 00:09:18,599 Speaker 1: you never thought was doable. Put your knee upon the 151 00:09:18,760 --> 00:09:28,560 Speaker 1: nice thing. Hold right there. Take that lamp shade off 152 00:09:28,600 --> 00:09:33,520 Speaker 1: the leaft handed hill. Watch this. What what you about 153 00:09:33,559 --> 00:09:35,920 Speaker 1: to take two corners up of the sheet off? Just 154 00:09:35,960 --> 00:09:44,760 Speaker 1: take two corners off. Watch put one hand on the window, 155 00:09:44,800 --> 00:09:47,160 Speaker 1: hold on, Hold on to the window, but pulling the 156 00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:49,199 Speaker 1: curtain back. That's too far back. Closing curtain just a 157 00:09:49,240 --> 00:09:52,160 Speaker 1: little bit. I'm now staying right there. I'm gonna go 158 00:09:52,200 --> 00:09:54,880 Speaker 1: back over here by the door. In that hot light 159 00:09:54,960 --> 00:10:02,880 Speaker 1: bulb if you can unscrew that, put some of this. 160 00:10:04,320 --> 00:10:06,480 Speaker 1: Put some of this hot baby or on the bottom 161 00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:16,560 Speaker 1: of my right foot right well, I'll need that for traction. Now, 162 00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:21,120 Speaker 1: everybody ready, I don't know where we're going. There ain't 163 00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:24,560 Speaker 1: nobody fing to be bored up in hill. I have ideas. 164 00:10:26,280 --> 00:10:34,439 Speaker 1: Bite down, on this hill. What is that now? Anything? 165 00:10:34,480 --> 00:10:39,400 Speaker 1: Don't worry about now. Surely here's the one mistake you 166 00:10:39,520 --> 00:10:41,800 Speaker 1: made in the letter. You said that she's attracted to 167 00:10:41,840 --> 00:10:47,280 Speaker 1: other men. I think she stated that she feels good 168 00:10:47,320 --> 00:10:51,360 Speaker 1: when other men noticed me. It does that she wants attention. 169 00:10:53,040 --> 00:10:55,400 Speaker 1: I want my husband and joy spending time with me. 170 00:10:55,480 --> 00:10:57,960 Speaker 1: I've talked to him about his attitude towards me, but 171 00:10:58,040 --> 00:11:01,280 Speaker 1: he still falls short. Could be the problem his height, 172 00:11:02,200 --> 00:11:04,959 Speaker 1: because that that could be it right there, But he's 173 00:11:04,960 --> 00:11:08,280 Speaker 1: still false. S's still falling short. If you're little man, 174 00:11:08,360 --> 00:11:11,680 Speaker 1: you ain't gonna get all that. I'm just saying just 175 00:11:11,800 --> 00:11:14,160 Speaker 1: in case that that's what you're doing. But if I 176 00:11:14,160 --> 00:11:16,240 Speaker 1: can get rid, but if I get red roses one 177 00:11:16,280 --> 00:11:18,920 Speaker 1: more damn time. On top of the ugly as ring 178 00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:21,800 Speaker 1: I'm looking, and the fact that you ain't frying this 179 00:11:21,920 --> 00:11:24,480 Speaker 1: bacon like I want to bring them thought, I'm gonna 180 00:11:24,520 --> 00:11:26,480 Speaker 1: take the roses. I'm gonna flip them upside down. I'm 181 00:11:26,480 --> 00:11:29,200 Speaker 1: gonna push all them thrones up so where sun don't shine. 182 00:11:30,120 --> 00:11:33,120 Speaker 1: Give me them roses one more time. I'm going to 183 00:11:33,160 --> 00:11:35,600 Speaker 1: flip out what I have to do. Listen to me, 184 00:11:35,720 --> 00:11:39,679 Speaker 1: you have to flip out he's not getting these conversations 185 00:11:39,720 --> 00:11:44,000 Speaker 1: you're having. You have to flip out because he don't 186 00:11:44,040 --> 00:11:48,040 Speaker 1: listen and it's about him you want in there making 187 00:11:48,080 --> 00:11:53,800 Speaker 1: sex exciting. You gotta flip out. He listening, You got 188 00:11:53,840 --> 00:11:57,680 Speaker 1: snap cracking poper you rice Christmas with milk on it. 189 00:11:58,400 --> 00:12:01,200 Speaker 1: Next time he bring them rare roses in there just 190 00:12:01,360 --> 00:12:04,240 Speaker 1: at the top of your loan? What now? What should 191 00:12:04,280 --> 00:12:07,320 Speaker 1: she do the next time he brings she bring them 192 00:12:07,320 --> 00:12:10,440 Speaker 1: red roses in there at the top of your long 193 00:12:11,520 --> 00:12:17,280 Speaker 1: I don't won't know, m f ff and red if 194 00:12:17,360 --> 00:12:24,080 Speaker 1: and roses no if and mulling what what and start 195 00:12:24,160 --> 00:12:30,839 Speaker 1: whipping him with the thrones. This is this has gotten yes, yes, 196 00:12:31,559 --> 00:12:34,040 Speaker 1: and he just walk out. He'd be rose panels all 197 00:12:34,040 --> 00:12:36,040 Speaker 1: over the floor. He got cuts on his own from 198 00:12:36,080 --> 00:12:39,080 Speaker 1: them thors and you're the custom out out the roses 199 00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:44,959 Speaker 1: rose as take the fus ring ain't work for don Alright, Steve, 200 00:12:45,040 --> 00:12:48,000 Speaker 1: we gotta go and I'm going here watching Porto take 201 00:12:48,080 --> 00:12:50,200 Speaker 1: on this man of him knocking the bains on this girl. 202 00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:53,880 Speaker 1: Email us or Instagram, what's your thoughts on today's Strawberry 203 00:12:53,920 --> 00:12:56,840 Speaker 1: letter at my Girls Shirley and please join me this Thursday. 204 00:12:57,720 --> 00:13:00,839 Speaker 1: Cheap as rain at pm East are in time for 205 00:13:00,880 --> 00:13:05,120 Speaker 1: the Strawberry Letter Live after show on Facebook. Okay, that's 206 00:13:05,120 --> 00:13:08,760 Speaker 1: all right, you're listening to the Stave Harvey Morning Show.