Speaker 1: I'm Honey German. My parents are Dominican. I was born
Speaker 1: and raised in New York City. I love sneakers and
Speaker 1: I'm a body positive advocate. I'm Carolina Bermudez, but i
Speaker 1: was born and raised in Ohio. I'm a wife, a mama,
Speaker 1: and a worker being. This is life. You know, like
Speaker 1: that one video where she says, don't do a girl,
Speaker 1: don't do it. What about that video? Don't do a girl,
Speaker 1: don't quit that job, don't be messy, don't get crazy,
Speaker 1: O Carolina. She's not talking to me directly, but she's
Speaker 1: talking to you, you know, our listeners. If you're having
Speaker 1: this thought right now, you can quit your job. But
Speaker 1: there is a good way to go about it. Well,
Speaker 1: we got to talk about the Great Resignation because I
Speaker 1: feel like everybody is at this stage in their life
Speaker 1: where they are reevaluating what's important to them, what they
Speaker 1: really want to do. I think the pandemic hit some
Speaker 1: of us harder than others. It really made us give
Speaker 1: some thought to whether or not you're really wasting your
Speaker 1: life at a company that doesn't value you. I know
Speaker 1: there are a lot of people who might be facing
Speaker 1: the same thing. There were many people who decided to
Speaker 1: go back to school because they said, you know what,
Speaker 1: this job is not for me. I feel like I
Speaker 1: could do more. I feel like I could expand, And
Speaker 1: I think the Great Resignation has a lot of people talking.
Speaker 1: But the one statistic that I thought that was really
Speaker 1: interesting was that it's being led by Latinas. That's a fact,
Speaker 1: you know. I read the same article and I found
Speaker 1: it incredible that it's like, we're like, we're not doing
Speaker 1: this anymore. And this has a lot to do with
Speaker 1: the pandemic, with COVID, with being locked down, and us
Speaker 1: restructuring and reshifting our I guess our thoughts on what
Speaker 1: is important, and it turns out that for Latinas, the
Speaker 1: job is not at the top of the list. Well.
Speaker 1: I think that culturally, we've always been the type of
Speaker 1: people to really put family first, and I think that
Speaker 1: given the situation where we were all kind of stuck
Speaker 1: at home, it made us realize, or it made certain
Speaker 1: people realize that they were spending more time commuting than
Speaker 1: they were actually speaking to their loved ones, or that
Speaker 1: they were spending more time in the office than they
Speaker 1: were with their family or their friends. So I think
Speaker 1: the Great resignation right now has a lot of people thinking.
Speaker 1: But you don't want to just walk in and be like,
Speaker 1: I quit this bitch, I'm out, and be like in
Speaker 1: a blaze of glory. I have a co host that
Speaker 1: I work with. His name is Greg t. He always
Speaker 1: said that if he was going to quit a job,
Speaker 1: he would go and poop on his boss's desk. And
Speaker 1: I said, that's not a good idea, That's not the
Speaker 1: way you want to be remembered. But there is a
Speaker 1: great hell no. I mean, I think his reputation precedes him.
Speaker 1: Everybody knows who he is. But for people like you
Speaker 1: and I who want to maintain great relationships, who really
Speaker 1: rely on those references, you want to go about it
Speaker 1: in a different kind of way. You do. And you know,
Speaker 1: I want to shout out everybody who's out here that
Speaker 1: you know that's feeding, that's feeling, you know, burnt out, overworked.
Speaker 1: You know, maybe your values are no longer the same
Speaker 1: values as your job, or even just a toxic environment.
Speaker 1: If you've been hanging on and you haven't walked into
Speaker 1: someone's office or haven't emailed them just one line, I quit.
Speaker 1: I give you props because I know a lot of
Speaker 1: people that struggled with this every single day, and they
Speaker 1: tell me like, I love my life, but my job
Speaker 1: is making me hate my life. Well, that's no way
Speaker 1: to live, though, And I know that we all need
Speaker 1: a job to survive, we all need food, shelter, etcetera,
Speaker 1: all of the all of the things, but you also
Speaker 1: need to have a quality of life, which I think
Speaker 1: is something that we need to examine. The issue for me,
Speaker 1: I think is that there are a lot of people
Speaker 1: who have looked at their requirements for their job and
Speaker 1: they're seeing that a lot of companies they downsized during
Speaker 1: the pandemic, So now you're not just doing one position,
Speaker 1: You're you're taking on to three four positions because they
Speaker 1: decided to streamline the company, and you're the person who's
Speaker 1: paying for it, not the person at the top. The
Speaker 1: person at the top never sees that they never have
Speaker 1: to deal with taking on more or biting off more
Speaker 1: than they can chew. And yes, a CEO has his
Speaker 1: or her own issues and problems, and I understand that.
Speaker 1: But for the everyday working American woman, which I believe
Speaker 1: we're speaking to a lot of women, but we also
Speaker 1: have a lot of men that listen to this podcast too.
Speaker 1: I think that there comes a point in time where
Speaker 1: you really stand back and you look at what you're contributing,
Speaker 1: and you think, is this how I'm going to go out? Like?
Speaker 1: Is this? Is this what the American dream is really about?
Speaker 1: Because for a lot of people at this point, it
Speaker 1: really isn't. It's not you know, it's just spending time
Speaker 1: with your family, not being Like for me, let's say
Speaker 1: I would be now I work remote, but before I
Speaker 1: would spend three hours on trains. That's three hours on trains.
Speaker 1: Now i'd be I'm reevaluating. I'm like, Wow, do I
Speaker 1: ever want to do that to myself? Ever? Again, I
Speaker 1: didn't even know my husband half the time. I don't,
Speaker 1: I know, I don't. And I've spoken to my friends
Speaker 1: who have started to go back into the city to
Speaker 1: three times a week, and they say, I don't understand
Speaker 1: how I maintained this before. I don't know how I
Speaker 1: juggled so many things and I didn't realize everything that
Speaker 1: I was missing at home. There are so many different
Speaker 1: angles and way used to look at it. For example,
Speaker 1: for me, my quality of life, where I think it
Speaker 1: really matters is family and sleep. I used to have
Speaker 1: to wake up at three thirty forty five in the
Speaker 1: morning to go into the city, and I was basically trying,
Speaker 1: let's say I was I was thinking, Okay, I got
Speaker 1: about an hour and a half commute, give or take,
Speaker 1: because you never know what traffic, construction, an accident, things
Speaker 1: of that nature, and you've got to be live in
Speaker 1: the studio. So for me, just taking that extra hour
Speaker 1: and a half that I used to devote to being
Speaker 1: on the road and white knuckling it and stressing out
Speaker 1: because I didn't know when that accident was going to
Speaker 1: get cleared. I don't need to have that anxiety in
Speaker 1: my life. But on the flip side, I love my job,
Speaker 1: so that's where you have to look at the bigger
Speaker 1: picture and decide what direction you really want to take.
Speaker 1: But the Great Resignation saw a lot of people just
Speaker 1: super frustrated and feeling uncertain and just throwing their hands
Speaker 1: up in the air and saying, I'd rather quit than
Speaker 1: continue doing this. And you know what, good for them,
Speaker 1: because you know, it takes a lot to make that decision,
Speaker 1: especially people that have been with accompanied me for a
Speaker 1: very long time. And I feel like, you know, this episode,
Speaker 1: I feel like we should make it about you know,
Speaker 1: that person that wants to quit and just doesn't know
Speaker 1: how to quit, Maybe we can give them some steps
Speaker 1: on how to quit properly. I don't even know if
Speaker 1: that sounds right, but how to make your exit out
Speaker 1: of your company, I guess a good exit. I think
Speaker 1: that's a great suggestion because I think that there are
Speaker 1: steps that you can take where maybe you you think
Speaker 1: this is the time for you to move on, but
Speaker 1: you just haven't spoken or advocated for yourself. Maybe you
Speaker 1: need to have that conversation with your manager and hint
Speaker 1: to them that you are thinking of leaving, and see
Speaker 1: what their vision is for you and the company. So
Speaker 1: maybe before you even start thinking of leaving, you have
Speaker 1: a sit down and you write down all of the
Speaker 1: things that you bring to the company. I am very friendly,
Speaker 1: I have great client relations, blah blah blah. Write down
Speaker 1: all of the qualities that make you a superstar and
Speaker 1: make you an asset to the company. Schedule a time
Speaker 1: with your manager and sit down and really try to
Speaker 1: dive in and say, these are the things that I
Speaker 1: see that I'm contributing to the company. Where do you
Speaker 1: see me heading in the next five to ten years
Speaker 1: or is there no plan? And then I think that's
Speaker 1: when you decide whether or not it's time to move on,
Speaker 1: because I think there are so many conversations that people
Speaker 1: don't have and then you look back and your man,
Speaker 1: I wish I would have just stood up for myself,
Speaker 1: or I wish I would have said something. So I
Speaker 1: think that that that for me would be the beginning.
Speaker 1: That's a great place to start, because I feel like
Speaker 1: a lot of people Carolina, they just feel like, no,
Speaker 1: I'm unappreciate it. No matter what I say, nothing is
Speaker 1: going to change. My boss doesn't appreciate my work. I'm
Speaker 1: just quitting. You know, a lot of people did just
Speaker 1: get in their feelings and you know what's that saying like,
Speaker 1: don't make permanent decisions on temporary emotions. And I feel
Speaker 1: like a yeah, And I feel like a lot of
Speaker 1: people that go in and just be like I quit.
Speaker 1: It's just temporary emotions. So it's like, have a conversation
Speaker 1: with your boss. No matter how scary the conversation may seem,
Speaker 1: they might see your side of things or they might
Speaker 1: be like, wow, I was just thinking about this new
Speaker 1: role for you, or you know what you're up for? Review.
Speaker 1: I was thinking about a great race. It might not
Speaker 1: go that way, but it might, so it doesn't hurt
Speaker 1: to try. Well. The other thing too, that I was
Speaker 1: thinking of ever forever married to the financial planner is
Speaker 1: do you have enough money tucked away so that you
Speaker 1: can make a decision like that and you could actually
Speaker 1: take them or two or three to find that next
Speaker 1: position that's the right one for you. You may not
Speaker 1: find something in three months, you may not find something
Speaker 1: in in in six or even a year, because it
Speaker 1: is just so uncertain right now. So I would highly
Speaker 1: highly suggest maybe looking at finances, seeing if this is
Speaker 1: a good time. Where can you look at look at
Speaker 1: your lifestyle. Maybe there are things that you can, you know,
Speaker 1: do away with. Maybe your entertainment budget won't be as big,
Speaker 1: or maybe you won't be going to specialized classes at
Speaker 1: certain gyms. You know, you have to really look at
Speaker 1: what you're going to do to set yourself up so
Speaker 1: that you're not a failure, so that you don't have
Speaker 1: to go and ask people for a loan or for
Speaker 1: help because you made such a rash decision. Now you
Speaker 1: better not quit this job if you don't have a
Speaker 1: nice stash of money in the bank, or better yet,
Speaker 1: if you don't have something else lined up, because you
Speaker 1: know what, online interviewing, you can interview at any time
Speaker 1: from any place. It's not like before we have to
Speaker 1: put on a suit and show up with a printed
Speaker 1: resume in front of an office and wait one hour
Speaker 1: and your boss would be like, oh, that's a long lunch.
Speaker 1: You don't got to do that anymore. You can set
Speaker 1: up you can hook up with a recruiter online, do
Speaker 1: all your interviewing before you even walk into your into
Speaker 1: your boss's office and say I quit. I love that
Speaker 1: because you're so right. I would. I remember there were
Speaker 1: people who were I was friends with that would say
Speaker 1: to me, oh, I have to go on this job interview,
Speaker 1: say that you're meeting with me so that they know
Speaker 1: that it ran long, and and I just say to them, oh,
Speaker 1: we had a meeting and I have to cover for you.
Speaker 1: And I said okay. I mean they never got that
Speaker 1: serious where anybody would ever ask me. But still you
Speaker 1: have to create these or fabricate these different stories just
Speaker 1: to get out there and just to promote yourself or
Speaker 1: just to be able to get in front of people.
Speaker 1: Now it's a zoom. Now it's a team's meeting, so
Speaker 1: you're straight. One thing. My friend she works for HR
Speaker 1: and she tells me all the time, like I advised
Speaker 1: people to follow recruiters for different companies. Pinpoint a company
Speaker 1: you want to work for it. Let's say you want
Speaker 1: to work for Google. Find the recruiter I Google follow them,
Speaker 1: and you know, just connections on LinkedIn. There's a lot
Speaker 1: of different ways you know that you can go about this.
Speaker 1: But I think the first thing you gotta do is,
Speaker 1: you know, make the decision when you want to quit.
Speaker 1: That's I think that's a good starting point. I think.
Speaker 1: So it's like really having that conversation with yourself and saying, Okay,
Speaker 1: this is it. You look yourself in the mirror that
Speaker 1: one day and you're getting out of the shower and
Speaker 1: you just know you just have that. Have you ever
Speaker 1: quit a job, honey? I have yet. But I've never
Speaker 1: quit a job without not having another job. I've never
Speaker 1: just gone home like and hope for the best. I've
Speaker 1: always done the whole, you know, from one job to another.
Speaker 1: I've been working since I was fifteen Carolina with practically
Speaker 1: no time off. I'm trying to think if I ever
Speaker 1: quit a job. I mean waitressing jobs, yes, but that
Speaker 1: wasn't really in my career. But no, nothing. I don't
Speaker 1: think that i've ever really quit when it comes to
Speaker 1: TV or radio or you know. So, I actually I'm
Speaker 1: not sure if I'm the best person to be given
Speaker 1: this advice right now. I'm just realizing that I haven't
Speaker 1: been in this. I always tell people canna get mad
Speaker 1: at me. So I would always prepare like a two
Speaker 1: week letter of a two weeks notice or whatever, and
Speaker 1: then whenever the big boss wasn't around, I would like
Speaker 1: put it on their desk with their name on it.
Speaker 1: Like I was never like that ballsy person that would
Speaker 1: go in and be like I quit. I never had
Speaker 1: like a negative quitting experience, but definitely two weeks noticed
Speaker 1: that would get planted right on their desk, and I
Speaker 1: guess they would read it privately if you like, this
Speaker 1: little bitch is leaving right, so then you don't have
Speaker 1: to see their face or their disappointment. See, that's the thing.
Speaker 1: I would always feel so guilty. But even though you
Speaker 1: do realize that these companies you're just a number, at
Speaker 1: that point, they're just gonna put your job posting up.
Speaker 1: They're gonna wait for people to respond, and it's gonna
Speaker 1: get filled unless unless you say to them you're gonna
Speaker 1: quit and they come to you with the counter offer. Baby,
Speaker 1: And that's what I'm talking about. You need to be prepared.
Speaker 1: You need to be ready to go with all your facts,
Speaker 1: like like just a machine gun. That's it, given them
Speaker 1: all the facts about you, telling them about all the
Speaker 1: wonderful things that you do. Because if they present you
Speaker 1: with a counter offer, that means that you're valuable, and
Speaker 1: that means that you need to use that point to
Speaker 1: get that leverage, and the leverage that you make there
Speaker 1: is going to set you up for that next promotion.
Speaker 1: So that's why I say, you really got to sit
Speaker 1: back and think about all of the things that you
Speaker 1: contribute to your job while you're there, so that if
Speaker 1: you're ever in this position, you're you're ready to go.
Speaker 1: One thing I will say, if if this job is
Speaker 1: not good for your mental and it is a toxic environment,
Speaker 1: no matter what they say, please you can find a
Speaker 1: better situation and a better environment where it will not
Speaker 1: affect your mental health. Because I do know people that
Speaker 1: are like, my job is making me sick. I can't
Speaker 1: the stress is killing me. The anxiety is killing me.
Speaker 1: I don't care what kind of counter offer these people
Speaker 1: come with. If it is not good for your soul
Speaker 1: and it is not good for your mental please walk away.
Speaker 1: But back to the counter offer, they can come with
Speaker 1: a lot of great things, Carolina. If you love it
Speaker 1: there and the problem is to pay, they might come
Speaker 1: with a counter offer. Have a solid number. This is
Speaker 1: how much I'm worth if you want me to day,
Speaker 1: this is how much you're gonna have to pay me.
Speaker 1: So money could be a counter offer. I want the
Speaker 1: private jet, I want Harah makeup, I want a wardrobe,
Speaker 1: I want a stylist. I want it at all. No,
Speaker 1: I'm kidding. And actually, you know what I did. Just
Speaker 1: think I did quit a job, and I can't even
Speaker 1: believe it's like one of the most important jobs of
Speaker 1: my career. I mean, it's not that I quit. I
Speaker 1: Elvi stir in And when I decided to walk away, Yes,
Speaker 1: they were starting a TV show and they needed anchors.
Speaker 1: And the agent that I had at the time knew
Speaker 1: that I wanted to work in television and I had
Speaker 1: been auditioning for the few and all this other stuff,
Speaker 1: and this opportunity came up and he said to me,
Speaker 1: look for a woman to begin her TV career in
Speaker 1: the number one market anchoring a morning show. It like
Speaker 1: basically never happens. So it's a local opportunity. Even though
Speaker 1: it wasn't national, which is something that I wanted. He said,
Speaker 1: this is where you could really get your start. But
Speaker 1: they need an answer, and they need you to decide
Speaker 1: and they want you to sign. And so there was
Speaker 1: the pressure, and so that's where you know what I did.
Speaker 1: I had to look at everything that I was contributing
Speaker 1: to the radio show. I had to look at my
Speaker 1: quality of life, the things that I wanted, not now,
Speaker 1: but ten years from now at that point, which was
Speaker 1: a family and all of the things that I needed.
Speaker 1: And so that's when I made the really really tough
Speaker 1: decision to walk away from the show. But I did
Speaker 1: confide in my mentor and in my boss at the time,
Speaker 1: because I said, I never wanted him to hear from
Speaker 1: somebody else. This industry is so small, and so that
Speaker 1: brings us to our next point. Yeah, it's like, if
Speaker 1: you have this on the brain and you when you
Speaker 1: make that choice, or when you make that decision, you
Speaker 1: want to leave in good graces. You don't want to
Speaker 1: leave with them saying like oh she's x y Z,
Speaker 1: or she let her job go just because she knew
Speaker 1: she was walking out the door. You definitely want to
Speaker 1: leave with a good reputation. That's a fact, especially what
Speaker 1: you just mentioned. You know, don't let your job go
Speaker 1: just because in your heart you've decided you no longer
Speaker 1: want to be here. Don't just stop working. Don't don't
Speaker 1: do that to your team. Don't do that to you know,
Speaker 1: to your reputation. Don't do that to your reference. Because
Speaker 1: you spent five years at a company, what are you
Speaker 1: gonna do? Say, do not call this company when you're
Speaker 1: here job searching, so you don't do it right, And
Speaker 1: especially when you're in front of the boss or whoever
Speaker 1: it is that you're quitting with. You know, just know
Speaker 1: what to say when you're gonna quit. Well. I also
Speaker 1: think that there are great things to say, and I
Speaker 1: also think that there are things that you shouldn't say, Like,
Speaker 1: this isn't the time for you to vent your frustrations
Speaker 1: about you know, Louis in the mail room or you
Speaker 1: know g G that brings fish in on Wednesdays. This
Speaker 1: is not your time to just like start rambling off
Speaker 1: about all of the things that you hate about the job.
Speaker 1: I think that it's very productive to let your boss
Speaker 1: know maybe the places that they can improve, because you
Speaker 1: want to leave it better than you found it. So
Speaker 1: I would say, maybe that's your opportunity to say, look,
Speaker 1: the reason why I'm leaving is because I was never
Speaker 1: expected to do accounting. And HR don't not making this up.
Speaker 1: You know, obviously, um, but that's where you spell it
Speaker 1: out for them and say, perhaps the next person that's
Speaker 1: coming in here, you might want them to have this
Speaker 1: skill set or I found that this was really challenging,
Speaker 1: or the hours just aren't working for me and my
Speaker 1: family anymore, you know, just give them some solid reasons
Speaker 1: so that they may be able to build off of
Speaker 1: that for the next person. Because you're leaving, it's not
Speaker 1: gonna make it's not gonna affect you in any way.
Speaker 1: But I do feel like you should. It's if you
Speaker 1: have like a big boss, let's say that it's not
Speaker 1: really in tune with your position of what you do.
Speaker 1: I really think that you should let them know. If
Speaker 1: their company is going through some struggles and the struggles
Speaker 1: pushed you out, I think you should make no and
Speaker 1: be like, Okay, I understand, you know, my direct supervisor,
Speaker 1: you don't really know what's going on, let's say in
Speaker 1: my department. But these are all the reasons that I'm leaving,
Speaker 1: And these are also all the areas where you can
Speaker 1: improve so that other people like me don't up and
Speaker 1: quit on you. So it's like, it depends really how
Speaker 1: comfortable you are with them and how much you really care.
Speaker 1: But I would definitely mention the reasons I quit so
Speaker 1: that they can fix it absolutely. And you know, you
Speaker 1: want to be really constructive in your criticism, and that's
Speaker 1: where we're saying, give them key points where they could
Speaker 1: actually do something to improve the work environment for that
Speaker 1: next person. I definitely think bad mouthing people before you
Speaker 1: walk out is not the move. It's just gonna make
Speaker 1: you look slimy. It's just gonna make you look bad.
Speaker 1: So reserve your thoughts to m f M up and
Speaker 1: down when you're with your girlfriends and be like, yeah,
Speaker 1: that's when you do it when you're with your family
Speaker 1: or with your friends or people that you actually trust.
Speaker 1: But that's not exactly exactly. Then you can give all
Speaker 1: the chiefsment to all of your friends. But at the workplace. No,
Speaker 1: the other thing that I was going to say, and
Speaker 1: this actually does relate to it. You may think, you
Speaker 1: may think that you can confide in people at work,
Speaker 1: but the minute you leave, they will tell your mess.
Speaker 1: So just stay quiet, stay consistent with your story, and
Speaker 1: leave it at that, and don't tell nobody talking about
Speaker 1: I'm gonna give notice. I'm gonna give notice because in
Speaker 1: five minutes gets who's gonna know? Your boss is gonna
Speaker 1: know you're gonna give notice. People cannot hold that in.
Speaker 1: You know how many places I've worked in that everyone say, oh,
Speaker 1: such and such is gonna quit. Oh such, that's given
Speaker 1: us two weeks for such such up getting thirty days.
Speaker 1: That spreads like wildfire in the office. So hold that
Speaker 1: right in your gut. Tell your sister, tell your friend,
Speaker 1: tell your husband. These motherfucker's don't know I'm about to
Speaker 1: quit on Friday. Not your co Yeah yeah, because then
Speaker 1: it's like be thicking honey, Yes, yeah, look at that work,
Speaker 1: you know, like that's but that's how it goes down.
Speaker 1: I start talking to somebody, then that person knows somebody,
Speaker 1: and then that person knows an assistant, and the assistance
Speaker 1: they know it all by the way, So don't think
Speaker 1: that the assistance don't know what's going on. Uh. The
Speaker 1: one thing that that I wanted to bring up as
Speaker 1: well is you gotta make it official, and that's the
Speaker 1: hard part. I feel like that's where you were a
Speaker 1: little bit scared before, where you would write the letter
Speaker 1: and you'd like slide it under the door. Always, always,
Speaker 1: I think Carolina. Now, at this point in my career,
Speaker 1: I definitely would set up a face to face meeting
Speaker 1: with the big boss, or even if it's just a
Speaker 1: live phone call if I can't go in person. But
Speaker 1: this time around, I would definitely show face. I feel
Speaker 1: like I'm mature enough and I understand that they value
Speaker 1: everything I gave the company and they cannot be mad
Speaker 1: at me. If I need to seek better opportunities for myself,
Speaker 1: I can't do it. I'm too emotional always. I cry
Speaker 1: when I'm mad, I cry when I'm happy, I cry
Speaker 1: when I'm sad. Obviously, Um, I mean, there is just
Speaker 1: any reason, and you know what it is. And I
Speaker 1: always related to that. I'm so invested. I really feel,
Speaker 1: I feel a lot of things, and it's so hard
Speaker 1: for me to really just let people I don't know.
Speaker 1: I I think it's hard for me to just put
Speaker 1: up this front. Yes, I'm a strong person. Yes I'm
Speaker 1: a strong woman. I yeah, all of the things. But
Speaker 1: I just think when it's my job, because I love
Speaker 1: it so much and because I've been this invested in it,
Speaker 1: I do get mushy. I get so that that would
Speaker 1: be a real challenge for me to do a face
Speaker 1: to face. I have to be honest. Some people welcome
Speaker 1: that face to face. They want to see that reaction.
Speaker 1: I want to see this bitch face when I tell
Speaker 1: how I'm not gonna work in no more. I really
Speaker 1: wouldn't want to do that. You love your job and
Speaker 1: you know and we love you back. So it would be, uh,
Speaker 1: it would be a hurtful moments. It'll be a breakup,
Speaker 1: you know. But some people it'll be like a sigh
Speaker 1: of relief. Some people would quit and walk outside Carolina
Speaker 1: and kiss every stranger walking down. I'm telling you because
Speaker 1: I have a lot of friends and I hear them,
Speaker 1: and there's a lot of people are very very unhappy.
Speaker 1: So yeah, but definitely a face to face. Don't do
Speaker 1: what I used to do. Don't slide a two weeks
Speaker 1: notice and don't send an email. I feel like it's
Speaker 1: kind of like informal. You know. I have to give
Speaker 1: credit to my old producer Colleen, because producer Colleen came
Speaker 1: to me a couple of months before she started looking
Speaker 1: at other jobs, and because we had such a great relationship.
Speaker 1: She said to me, and it was kind of the
Speaker 1: same thing. So I felt like it was reciprocated because
Speaker 1: the way that I went to Elvis when I was
Speaker 1: looking for another job, she came to me because she
Speaker 1: knew this was my right arm, my right hand. This
Speaker 1: girl anticipated everything I was going to say before I
Speaker 1: even said it. She knew what direction I was going
Speaker 1: to go in, and so I really saw myself growing
Speaker 1: with her. And when she came to tell me, I
Speaker 1: knew how hard that had to be for her, because
Speaker 1: I know how hard it was for me when I
Speaker 1: had to have that conversation with somebody that I respected.
Speaker 1: And the minute that she said it, my heartbroke for me, obviously,
Speaker 1: because I was like, oh my gosh, what am I
Speaker 1: gonna do without this girl? But then I said to her, look,
Speaker 1: I respect and appreciate you so much, and I love
Speaker 1: you so much. I will be here for you every
Speaker 1: step of the way. I just don't ever want to
Speaker 1: know from somebody else. Please please just keep me in
Speaker 1: the loop when you find the gig. I want to know,
Speaker 1: and let's just keep the lines of communication open. And
Speaker 1: then I did say to her, this stays between me
Speaker 1: and you. I will not tell a soul. And I
Speaker 1: didn't because I felt like that would be so unfair
Speaker 1: for her to be looking to get out of this
Speaker 1: industry or looking to get out of this job, and
Speaker 1: to tell people her business that really wasn't my place.
Speaker 1: So I am so proud that she can confided in me,
Speaker 1: and I'm really glad that she did that, But I
Speaker 1: think it also gave me time to mentally prepare for
Speaker 1: her to exit. Carolina, You're an amazing person, but you're
Speaker 1: also one in a million. I don't think anybody who
Speaker 1: will thinking about quitting their job would even go to
Speaker 1: their boss and say I'm thinking of quitting. I guess
Speaker 1: out of fear of being fired on the spot. You
Speaker 1: know you have tacked, you have. I guess you're caring person.
Speaker 1: Some people don't react well. Some losses do not react
Speaker 1: well to the news that you no longer want to
Speaker 1: be at the company because of a lot of different things.
Speaker 1: They have to replace you. They might feel like you're ungrateful.
Speaker 1: And there's also the whole aspect of I no longer
Speaker 1: want a person accessing my files or accessing, you know,
Speaker 1: my records. That's no longer going to be with me. So,
Speaker 1: you know, I don't know if if you can actually
Speaker 1: confide in anyone as far as I'm not gonna I'm
Speaker 1: gonna be looking, then they feel like you're gonna be
Speaker 1: looking on their time. It's weird. You're dope. You're super
Speaker 1: dope for that. And Colleen doesn't understand how lucky she
Speaker 1: is because I know people actively searching and they are hiding.
Speaker 1: I didn't want her to do that. Yeah, I didn't
Speaker 1: want her sneaking around. I didn't think it was fair
Speaker 1: for her for her mental load because I knew that
Speaker 1: she was still gonna help me with it. So it
Speaker 1: is a lot when you're really when you're thinking about
Speaker 1: repositioning in life and now what we're in our thirties worties.
Speaker 1: I'm in my forties, she's in her thirties, and so
Speaker 1: I thought to myself, Okay, this is an opportunity. You
Speaker 1: can either help her support her and encourage her, or
Speaker 1: you could be an actual bitch, make her life miserable
Speaker 1: and make your own life uncomfortable. And that for me
Speaker 1: was not the move. So I I do have to say,
Speaker 1: like I give producer Calling a lot of credit, but
Speaker 1: I also think that we fostered that environment with each other.
Speaker 1: So even though I said don't tell people, I think
Speaker 1: if there is that one person, or if you're if
Speaker 1: you have a mentor, but that's the thing, people can
Speaker 1: turn like that. Honey, that's the problem, Carolina. Let's especially,
Speaker 1: let's say like an industry where people know each other.
Speaker 1: Let's say like let's say radio. We both work in radio.
Speaker 1: Everybody knows each other in radio. There is no going
Speaker 1: to your mentor that works in another market and telling
Speaker 1: them you want to leave. There's no such thing, because
Speaker 1: it's like everybody knows everybody, and and somebody always tells somebody.
Speaker 1: You know, you know the amount of stuff I hear,
Speaker 1: oh such and such as quitting, Oh such and such
Speaker 1: as a high it over here and they're gonna announce
Speaker 1: it in six months, and they just talk. Everybody talks.
Speaker 1: I'm like, why do I always end up knowing when
Speaker 1: somebody's gearing up for a career changed. It's because the
Speaker 1: industry is very small, and even though New York is huge,
Speaker 1: New York is a little backyard when it comes to
Speaker 1: certain industries, and people will sabotage you too. I've noticed
Speaker 1: that in our industry. Figure I saw it when I
Speaker 1: was looking for my own co host, when I would
Speaker 1: tell people who I was thinking of having to come
Speaker 1: on the show because we did a bunch of tryouts.
Speaker 1: I tried out, I know, and I loved it, and
Speaker 1: I was so hopeful and that got shot down. But
Speaker 1: I know, I I really, I really wanted to create
Speaker 1: a show. And I asked them, I said, can I
Speaker 1: Can I get a third mic? Can I get a
Speaker 1: co host and a third mic? Can I get two producers?
Speaker 1: Can I get? I think I asked for literally everything
Speaker 1: and a Capri Son because I'm not even joking. I
Speaker 1: asked for seriously every combination Luna and kept saying no, no, no,
Speaker 1: no no to me. But I at least love that
Speaker 1: I tried. But there were people who were really grimy
Speaker 1: that I would say, oh, so and so is gonna
Speaker 1: come and try out with me for three days. You
Speaker 1: don't want so and so, so and so is X
Speaker 1: y Z and so and so does this. Oh and
Speaker 1: you don't even know about this about so and so,
Speaker 1: And I was like, well, damn. It really made me question.
Speaker 1: It made me question the people who were saying the
Speaker 1: trash to me because I'm like, wow, you're gonna dog
Speaker 1: that person out before they even got a chance. That
Speaker 1: some of the people I didn't even meet in person,
Speaker 1: like I had never met, but I feel like that
Speaker 1: was so unfair, And if anything, I think I was
Speaker 1: more kind to those people because I was like, Wow,
Speaker 1: some people really are trying to throw some dirt on you.
Speaker 1: This is not cool. So you want to almost help
Speaker 1: those people. But back to the whole like great resignation,
Speaker 1: I think that one of the most important things that
Speaker 1: you need to remember is don't blow off the exit interview.
Speaker 1: I think it's always a good look, like we to
Speaker 1: have that conversation with your manager, tell him or her
Speaker 1: where they can improve. The exit interview is where you
Speaker 1: can really get down with HR and you can let
Speaker 1: HR no, Hey, just a heads up. I was hired
Speaker 1: to be a photographer, but now I'm a videographer. Now
Speaker 1: I'm doing social media, and now I'm doing this or
Speaker 1: that and that's where you can maybe bring some of
Speaker 1: those red flag things up to h R in your
Speaker 1: exit in a more professional way. I mean, look, I
Speaker 1: don't know. I mean we're just trying to kind of
Speaker 1: navigate through this whole thing. But I know that there
Speaker 1: are so many people who are desperate to get out
Speaker 1: of their situations because it's such a toxic environment or
Speaker 1: because they're not seeing that growth that they expected. And
Speaker 1: I think also, you know, don't forget to you know,
Speaker 1: what you learned and what what what you know, what
Speaker 1: the career or we're working at this company taught you,
Speaker 1: you know, take away from it, you know, write it
Speaker 1: all down, but like this was my experience, this is
Speaker 1: what I learned. Kind of like wrap it all up
Speaker 1: and don't beat yourself up. Don't be like, oh, I
Speaker 1: wasted five years of my life at this horrible company.
Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure there were good moments and I'm pretty
Speaker 1: sure that you learned a lot from you know, your
Speaker 1: current role. So give yourself a little bit of credit.
Speaker 1: Don't beat yourself up. And also ask your manager, you know,
Speaker 1: like would you be willing to give me a reference?
Speaker 1: You know, leave that door open, and you know, don't
Speaker 1: kill the relationship. Don't leave there with a stank attitude.
Speaker 1: Well yeah, and then I just thought of another thing.
Speaker 1: Social media is not your friend when you're about to
Speaker 1: resign homies. Social media is not the spot. Don't be
Speaker 1: putting up memes. Don't be putting I mean just people
Speaker 1: can see right through that, the unhappiness, the negativity. Don't
Speaker 1: contribute to it. I've always heard as saying, and I'm
Speaker 1: gonna probably butcher it because I don't remember it verbatim,
Speaker 1: but make your moves in silence. Don't be posting it.
Speaker 1: I think there's so many people who do that. Here's
Speaker 1: your here's your quote, well, the hood version of the quote.
Speaker 1: Real geez moving silence like lasagna. Okay, yes, exactly, Yes,
Speaker 1: that's exactly what it is. I could come to you
Speaker 1: for it. Yes, I think that's jay Z or Biggie,
Speaker 1: one of the two. Don't don't kill me for it.
Speaker 1: But yo, stay quiet. And even after you quit, Carolina,
Speaker 1: there is no reason to go on social media and
Speaker 1: vent about your coworkers, vent about the company, vent about
Speaker 1: your boss. Even if you don't name people by name,
Speaker 1: trust me, that post is gonna make it to every
Speaker 1: single coworkers. Supervisor manager and vice president's desk. There's your
Speaker 1: employee that quit. This is what he is saying about you.
Speaker 1: And you never know when you're gonna come back, because
Speaker 1: look at me. For example, I left the company, I
Speaker 1: went to CBS. I came back to my heart because
Speaker 1: I tried to do things and the best possible in
Speaker 1: the most respectful way. Everybody has their own version of things.
Speaker 1: All you have to do is just be you're in
Speaker 1: yourself and be confident that you did it the best
Speaker 1: way that you possibly could. So I don't know. I
Speaker 1: hope that this episode, if you know somebody who's struggling
Speaker 1: or going through this, maybe you can share it with them,
Speaker 1: because number one, they're not alone. Number Two, I think
Speaker 1: that there are a lot of people who are sitting
Speaker 1: back and really looking and thinking to themselves. Whether it's
Speaker 1: a career move, whether it is staying home for good
Speaker 1: for a short period of time, or for you know,
Speaker 1: taking a sabbatical. Maybe you've wanted to be more creative
Speaker 1: in your life, maybe you want to write all of
Speaker 1: those things, whatever it is that you want to do. Unfortunately,
Speaker 1: for people who are not planners, I would say you've
Speaker 1: got to have a plan. You've gotta have some points
Speaker 1: and stick to them so that in the end you
Speaker 1: don't get burned. We're just looking out for you. We
Speaker 1: don't want you to burn that little hell no, and
Speaker 1: we don't want you to burn these bridges. You know,
Speaker 1: people be like, I'm gonna burn this bridge, and you
Speaker 1: know whatever, move on. I these people like, nah, don't
Speaker 1: do that, and whatever you do. Also, make sure to
Speaker 1: write a resignation letter. Yes, yes, you have to file.
Speaker 1: Leave it for your file, you know. And here's a
Speaker 1: couple of things that you know you should make sure
Speaker 1: you hit, you know, just not your last day. Let
Speaker 1: them know. Also, you know, appreciation and gratitude. Let them
Speaker 1: know what you're appreciative of and you know maybe um,
Speaker 1: you know, just thank them. I look forward to maybe
Speaker 1: marking with you again the same way you just said. Like,
Speaker 1: you know, it's like I'm in a position now, but
Speaker 1: let's say I moved on and then in four years
Speaker 1: they're like, wow, we have this great, you know, senior
Speaker 1: vice president position. And they're like, and I apply and
Speaker 1: they're like wow. She was amazing. Even when she left,
Speaker 1: she was so you know, she was so gracious, she
Speaker 1: was so nice, She did it in such a good
Speaker 1: manner that you never know. You just might go back
Speaker 1: to that company later on as a big boss, and
Speaker 1: then you'll already know what to do, what not to do,
Speaker 1: and how to make sure that the culture at the
Speaker 1: company is what you would have loved. Can give one
Speaker 1: more because it's just I'm just here, this is our show,
Speaker 1: this is us. I I would love if you are
Speaker 1: considering leaving and you've seen somebody hustling and really doing
Speaker 1: their best and trying to move up within the company,
Speaker 1: give a word of recommendation. Say, hey, this job did
Speaker 1: not work out for me, but Melissa has really shown
Speaker 1: me that she wants to grow. I think that you
Speaker 1: guys should pay some attention to her. Maybe you can
Speaker 1: provide her with some training. I think that that might
Speaker 1: be the catalyst for one person to move up in
Speaker 1: their career. Just because it didn't work out for you
Speaker 1: doesn't mean that you can't leave. I don't know. I
Speaker 1: just I always try to look at the bright side.
Speaker 1: I always try to look at how how can we
Speaker 1: lift each other up? How can we lift up another person,
Speaker 1: whether it's a guy or girl, whoever it is. When
Speaker 1: you're leaving, if you've seen that person that's taking on
Speaker 1: three jobs. And that's always the person that you go
Speaker 1: to when you're in a pinch and you're like, damn, girl,
Speaker 1: can you come and help me out. That's the person
Speaker 1: that you tell the big boss when you're having the conversation,
Speaker 1: thank you for everything. I'm sorry that our time is done.
Speaker 1: If I may, I do have to say I think
Speaker 1: Denise is a star. I think Denise really needs some
Speaker 1: more attention and maybe some training, and I think that
Speaker 1: you could really get a great employee out of her.
Speaker 1: I just have to give you my two cents before
Speaker 1: I leave. That is something that I think is super important.
Speaker 1: You know what's crazy, Carolina. I got my start working
Speaker 1: as a paralegal because of a situation like that. I
Speaker 1: was just a receptionist. I was eighteen years old, and
Speaker 1: I remember right by my desk there was an older woman,
Speaker 1: maybe fifties sixties, I don't remember exactly, and she always
Speaker 1: used to be like, let me teach you this or
Speaker 1: let me teach you that, and I'm like, fine, teach me,
Speaker 1: teach me, teach me, teach me. A year goes by,
Speaker 1: she retires, and before she retired, she tells my boss,
Speaker 1: you know who I want to have my job. You
Speaker 1: see that girl on the receptionist desk, she knows how
Speaker 1: to do everything I do. I taught her for the
Speaker 1: past year. I want you to give her my office.
Speaker 1: And Carolina, at nineteen years old, they put me in
Speaker 1: an office and I became a civil litigation paralegal and
Speaker 1: then I went to school to get my certificate and boom,
Speaker 1: I was getting that bread early in the game. What
Speaker 1: a gift. And all she had to do was have
Speaker 1: a conversation. So think about it that way, yes, and
Speaker 1: then you know, I feel like the karma for you
Speaker 1: will grow and it will open if you if you
Speaker 1: just do your best to try to help other people out. Look,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I feel like we've definitely brought up
Speaker 1: some great points tonight. But if you want to reach
Speaker 1: out to us, well, if we hold on stretch before
Speaker 1: you patch yourself on the back. Girl, just I just
Speaker 1: feel like we just gave so much good advice today.
Speaker 1: I really do. I really and I feel like we
Speaker 1: can pull from our own experiences and if we learned something,
Speaker 1: we can give that information to you guys so that
Speaker 1: you can do better. I always want people to do
Speaker 1: better than I did. And that's just something that I've
Speaker 1: I've always been that way. I've never been the jealous
Speaker 1: type of person where oh I don't want this person
Speaker 1: to come up because we can all eat. We can
Speaker 1: all eat, but you've got to support each other. You
Speaker 1: put yourself in a position. Yes, there's food for everybody,
Speaker 1: I mean, gas, I don't know. I don't know if
Speaker 1: y'all can afford it right now? Can I like carpool
Speaker 1: all day? I'm serious? But no, for real, if you
Speaker 1: guys have any questions, always feel free to reach out
Speaker 1: to us. D M me at the Real Carolina. Some
Speaker 1: of you guys reached out after the last episode and
Speaker 1: I love when you give me your feedback number one.
Speaker 1: But if you have follow up questions, We're always here
Speaker 1: for you. You guys are the reason why we do
Speaker 1: this podcast, and we can always you know, share articles,
Speaker 1: you know, if we mentioned a study, you know, just
Speaker 1: hit us up and be like, do you happen to
Speaker 1: have the link? And you know what, if we don't
Speaker 1: have it, we'll find it for you. We're here for you,
Speaker 1: We work for you. Absolutely, Yes, we are your resource,
Speaker 1: so make sure you hit us up. I'm at the
Speaker 1: Real Carolina on all social media. Follow me on a
Speaker 1: Graham I am Honey German and just Honey German on
Speaker 1: everything else. I'm actually the only Honey German in the world. Carolina.
Speaker 1: That's so amazing. I'm telling you I'm the real Carolina,
Speaker 1: but only because there were imposters, damn it. So learn
Speaker 1: from my mistake. Get your name, Parker name, go, buy
Speaker 1: your website. Do it all because you don't want to
Speaker 1: end up like me. Have a great day, guys, all right,
Speaker 1: make sure to subscribe Pisa. Lifense Banglish is a production
Speaker 1: of Lipense Banglish Productions in partnership with I Hearts michaela
Speaker 1: podcast network