1 00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:08,039 Speaker 1: H Potomac season five, episode nine holds one of the 2 00:00:08,119 --> 00:00:12,719 Speaker 1: craziest fights in all Housewives history between Candice and Monique. 3 00:00:13,080 --> 00:00:16,840 Speaker 1: Drinks are flying, hair is being pulled, people are bleeding. 4 00:00:17,120 --> 00:00:21,000 Speaker 1: Actress singer, Broadway star, Potomac super fan and author of 5 00:00:21,000 --> 00:00:24,000 Speaker 1: her new book I'm no Philosopher, but I Got thoughts, 6 00:00:24,440 --> 00:00:28,280 Speaker 1: Christian Channowith is diving in deep to dissect this episode. 7 00:00:28,720 --> 00:00:32,320 Speaker 1: This is the Real Housewives of Potomac Season five, episode nine, 8 00:00:32,800 --> 00:00:47,400 Speaker 1: the tipping point. So this is unique because, um, I 9 00:00:47,479 --> 00:00:52,160 Speaker 1: haven't seen all series, like I I when I left. 10 00:00:52,840 --> 00:00:55,720 Speaker 1: You know, I'll watch occasionally, but I'm not this avid 11 00:00:56,400 --> 00:00:58,320 Speaker 1: fan across. It's hard. It would be hard to keep 12 00:00:58,400 --> 00:01:00,640 Speaker 1: up with all of them. I bet your loyal to brands. 13 00:01:00,640 --> 00:01:04,960 Speaker 1: You're loyal to certain uh franchise cities, and I hear 14 00:01:05,000 --> 00:01:08,400 Speaker 1: that this is one of them. Oh yeah, that you're loyal, 15 00:01:08,520 --> 00:01:10,360 Speaker 1: But are you loyal to all or this is? Like 16 00:01:10,480 --> 00:01:13,200 Speaker 1: this is your ride or die? Um my rider die 17 00:01:13,319 --> 00:01:17,679 Speaker 1: is uh Beverly Hills. Well not right now, that's the name. 18 00:01:17,720 --> 00:01:22,120 Speaker 1: My writer die is Utah. Oh wow, okay, I mean 19 00:01:23,400 --> 00:01:26,679 Speaker 1: what attracts you to a particular city. I think the 20 00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:30,760 Speaker 1: combination of the energy of the women. So um, okay, 21 00:01:30,800 --> 00:01:33,319 Speaker 1: so this show you will be more of an expert 22 00:01:33,319 --> 00:01:36,800 Speaker 1: than I will. But I found this episode. You know 23 00:01:37,120 --> 00:01:39,240 Speaker 1: you haven't been on rewives and we haven't. We share 24 00:01:39,240 --> 00:01:41,679 Speaker 1: a publicist, and I'm sure she told you this show 25 00:01:41,760 --> 00:01:44,360 Speaker 1: is not about the housewives. The show is about the 26 00:01:44,400 --> 00:01:49,440 Speaker 1: conversations with these episodes as vehicles. So this particular episode 27 00:01:49,480 --> 00:01:52,720 Speaker 1: that we chose of Potomac, there are so many conversations 28 00:01:52,760 --> 00:01:55,240 Speaker 1: to be had. And as I watched the episode, because 29 00:01:55,240 --> 00:01:56,840 Speaker 1: I've never seen it and I know that you have, 30 00:01:57,360 --> 00:02:00,360 Speaker 1: I texted Candy Burst from Atlanta and said, will you 31 00:02:00,400 --> 00:02:03,040 Speaker 1: come on in the middle of my podcast for ten 32 00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:06,320 Speaker 1: minutes because there's a topic that I don't think two 33 00:02:06,320 --> 00:02:11,119 Speaker 1: white women can have an accurate perspective and insight on. 34 00:02:11,320 --> 00:02:13,639 Speaker 1: So this morning I was watching the episode because you know, 35 00:02:13,720 --> 00:02:18,920 Speaker 1: I do homework for this, and I said, interesting, I 36 00:02:18,960 --> 00:02:21,880 Speaker 1: think I want to call. I texted Candy and said 37 00:02:21,880 --> 00:02:24,040 Speaker 1: I and she just came in blind. She said, I 38 00:02:24,080 --> 00:02:26,640 Speaker 1: don't watch the show. I saw the clips, but sure, 39 00:02:26,720 --> 00:02:28,840 Speaker 1: so we'll get into that and I'll get more specific 40 00:02:28,919 --> 00:02:31,120 Speaker 1: to the audience understands. But for the first time ever, 41 00:02:31,160 --> 00:02:33,440 Speaker 1: I'm going to have an actual housewife on the show, 42 00:02:33,800 --> 00:02:37,360 Speaker 1: because I just really did not feel like I cannot 43 00:02:37,919 --> 00:02:40,240 Speaker 1: know what it would feel like to be a black 44 00:02:40,280 --> 00:02:43,960 Speaker 1: woman in this particular experience that happens on this episode. 45 00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:46,320 Speaker 1: And now I think it's a great episode to discuss. 46 00:02:46,440 --> 00:02:49,440 Speaker 1: I'm glad you did that, Bethany, because I too have 47 00:02:49,560 --> 00:02:52,760 Speaker 1: a couple of thoughts and opinions and questions about the episode. 48 00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:55,640 Speaker 1: And one of the reasons I'm glad it's Candy because 49 00:02:55,639 --> 00:02:57,400 Speaker 1: one of the reasons I watched in Land is her. 50 00:02:58,240 --> 00:03:00,320 Speaker 1: Oh interesting. Okay, well I don't know if you've met her, 51 00:03:00,320 --> 00:03:04,880 Speaker 1: but you'll meet her today. Okay. So that's an extra treat. 52 00:03:04,960 --> 00:03:07,799 Speaker 1: And it just literally was an impromptu text this morning 53 00:03:07,840 --> 00:03:10,720 Speaker 1: while watching this this this episode. Okay, so this is 54 00:03:10,760 --> 00:03:13,680 Speaker 1: the Real Housewives of Potomac. So many of you have 55 00:03:13,800 --> 00:03:16,040 Speaker 1: seen it, many of you have not. I had not. 56 00:03:16,280 --> 00:03:19,320 Speaker 1: This is a conversation through which the show is a vehicle. 57 00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:21,519 Speaker 1: So we're gonna end up talking about issues that don't 58 00:03:21,560 --> 00:03:23,639 Speaker 1: have to have to do with these particular women or 59 00:03:23,680 --> 00:03:28,400 Speaker 1: the Housewives or Bravo. So this show is in Potomac 60 00:03:28,440 --> 00:03:31,080 Speaker 1: and these women are at a vineyard, I guess, and 61 00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:34,320 Speaker 1: they're all talking and they're standing up, and my first 62 00:03:34,520 --> 00:03:39,200 Speaker 1: impression was, what a beautiful group of women, you know, 63 00:03:39,320 --> 00:03:41,560 Speaker 1: like I just it was a beautiful group of women. 64 00:03:42,120 --> 00:03:46,600 Speaker 1: And you know, I've watched Orange County and Orange County. 65 00:03:46,600 --> 00:03:48,680 Speaker 1: To me, if I had to describe it, it's very 66 00:03:48,680 --> 00:03:51,000 Speaker 1: it can be very authentic, and it can get really messy, 67 00:03:51,080 --> 00:03:54,560 Speaker 1: like it's a messy show. And Atlanta is half messy 68 00:03:54,640 --> 00:03:56,480 Speaker 1: to me, like it can be really polished and then 69 00:03:56,880 --> 00:03:59,840 Speaker 1: then then really messy. And Jersey is fairly messy to 70 00:04:00,160 --> 00:04:03,000 Speaker 1: New York is a hybrid Beverly Hills. They don't really 71 00:04:03,040 --> 00:04:05,800 Speaker 1: act that messy, even they might be because they have 72 00:04:05,880 --> 00:04:07,800 Speaker 1: to act like they're very rich and above that. And 73 00:04:07,800 --> 00:04:10,960 Speaker 1: even though there are Lisa, Rinna and and Kim moments. 74 00:04:10,960 --> 00:04:14,800 Speaker 1: So I'm watching the show and I'm thinking, everybody's so 75 00:04:15,280 --> 00:04:19,799 Speaker 1: mature and having such you know, intelligent conversations and taking 76 00:04:19,839 --> 00:04:21,880 Speaker 1: the right side of things, and they all get along 77 00:04:21,920 --> 00:04:24,160 Speaker 1: so well. I'm thinking is I'm thinking, Wow, they all 78 00:04:24,200 --> 00:04:29,040 Speaker 1: really seem to like each other. And one woman, Um Ashley, 79 00:04:29,240 --> 00:04:31,600 Speaker 1: is married to what I think is an Australian man. 80 00:04:31,839 --> 00:04:34,560 Speaker 1: It seems like a wealthy Australian man based on the 81 00:04:34,600 --> 00:04:37,240 Speaker 1: Green Up discussion. I can't tell if they're married or not, 82 00:04:37,279 --> 00:04:40,560 Speaker 1: but yes, you're right. Well, okay, so it seems And 83 00:04:40,640 --> 00:04:42,960 Speaker 1: by the way this is I may get hate for this, 84 00:04:43,040 --> 00:04:47,320 Speaker 1: but you know, the women seem like hot and together 85 00:04:47,400 --> 00:04:49,720 Speaker 1: and the men seemed to me a little schlubby. So 86 00:04:49,800 --> 00:04:52,960 Speaker 1: this guy, I I am hearing an argument between not 87 00:04:53,040 --> 00:04:57,320 Speaker 1: an argument, I'm hearing a discussion, a very calm, rational 88 00:04:57,400 --> 00:05:01,480 Speaker 1: discussion between Ashley and these other women about the fact 89 00:05:01,520 --> 00:05:05,120 Speaker 1: that are partner life partner was caught in a room 90 00:05:05,200 --> 00:05:10,520 Speaker 1: on camera and his underwear with a woman, and she 91 00:05:10,600 --> 00:05:14,360 Speaker 1: knows about it, and she's sort of going to forgive him, 92 00:05:14,440 --> 00:05:18,840 Speaker 1: and she wants to have a post up drawn up 93 00:05:18,839 --> 00:05:21,240 Speaker 1: and if he does this again then it will really 94 00:05:21,279 --> 00:05:25,120 Speaker 1: be the end. But she has had trists with women 95 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:28,320 Speaker 1: coming into the relationship before, and they all have this 96 00:05:29,040 --> 00:05:32,120 Speaker 1: very adult conversation where everybody understands each other, and it 97 00:05:32,120 --> 00:05:36,400 Speaker 1: seems like a really interesting issue to deal with. Yes, 98 00:05:36,680 --> 00:05:41,760 Speaker 1: I agree, especially you know, first of all, we must learn, 99 00:05:41,800 --> 00:05:44,080 Speaker 1: if not now, then when you cannot judge a book 100 00:05:44,080 --> 00:05:46,480 Speaker 1: by its cover, so you wouldn't think looking at her, 101 00:05:47,520 --> 00:05:52,280 Speaker 1: oh they're in a three way. But also just because 102 00:05:52,320 --> 00:05:56,120 Speaker 1: a woman says that's okay with me. I agree to that. 103 00:05:56,120 --> 00:05:59,160 Speaker 1: That's okay with me, And then she changes her mind 104 00:05:59,440 --> 00:06:02,000 Speaker 1: after her children are born and says, you know what, 105 00:06:02,080 --> 00:06:04,520 Speaker 1: it's not working. From many I actually love the way 106 00:06:04,560 --> 00:06:08,320 Speaker 1: she handles herself with this situation. She woke up one 107 00:06:08,360 --> 00:06:10,719 Speaker 1: day and said, I've had these two kids. I don't 108 00:06:10,760 --> 00:06:13,080 Speaker 1: think I want to do that anymore with my with 109 00:06:13,120 --> 00:06:15,919 Speaker 1: my partner, I want it to be just him and 110 00:06:16,200 --> 00:06:18,640 Speaker 1: him and me. And I think the reason she's wanting 111 00:06:18,680 --> 00:06:21,159 Speaker 1: to forgive him and the ladies are having trouble with that, 112 00:06:21,279 --> 00:06:24,240 Speaker 1: some of them is because she knew what she agreed to, 113 00:06:24,360 --> 00:06:27,120 Speaker 1: and now she's asking him to change, and so we're 114 00:06:27,160 --> 00:06:29,480 Speaker 1: going to see if he can. She's willing to say, 115 00:06:29,640 --> 00:06:32,080 Speaker 1: I want to give it a chance, you know, I 116 00:06:32,120 --> 00:06:35,840 Speaker 1: want to see And sometimes women, it's so interesting. We're 117 00:06:35,839 --> 00:06:39,880 Speaker 1: supposed to be each other's ally, right, instead of what 118 00:06:39,920 --> 00:06:42,800 Speaker 1: are you saying you can't do that? How about she 119 00:06:42,880 --> 00:06:46,640 Speaker 1: wants to make it work? And so interesting much who 120 00:06:46,640 --> 00:06:50,560 Speaker 1: are we to do? Okay? So a couple five different 121 00:06:50,560 --> 00:06:52,520 Speaker 1: things came up in my mind. The first thought that 122 00:06:52,560 --> 00:06:56,040 Speaker 1: I had was to prove your point that you made. 123 00:06:56,440 --> 00:07:01,520 Speaker 1: You're a woman of faith, which doesn't mean that you, 124 00:07:01,520 --> 00:07:03,400 Speaker 1: you know, walked out of the show because you saw 125 00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:05,080 Speaker 1: that a woman had been with another woman and a man. 126 00:07:05,520 --> 00:07:07,760 Speaker 1: You may not live your life that way or choose 127 00:07:07,760 --> 00:07:10,040 Speaker 1: to live your life that way. And maybe you do, 128 00:07:10,240 --> 00:07:13,000 Speaker 1: and maybe you have your own you know, your your 129 00:07:13,080 --> 00:07:15,200 Speaker 1: relationship with God and how you run your own life 130 00:07:15,200 --> 00:07:18,440 Speaker 1: and your own faith. But you are not one of 131 00:07:18,480 --> 00:07:22,680 Speaker 1: these Twitter But you know Box saying you're wrong and 132 00:07:22,760 --> 00:07:27,119 Speaker 1: being judgmental about this woman who has been okay with 133 00:07:27,520 --> 00:07:30,840 Speaker 1: another woman coming into their relationship, and also who isn't 134 00:07:31,160 --> 00:07:35,080 Speaker 1: nailing her husband to the cross for being in a 135 00:07:35,160 --> 00:07:37,120 Speaker 1: room with a woman, being in a room in his 136 00:07:37,240 --> 00:07:40,040 Speaker 1: underwear with another woman when we haven't walked in her 137 00:07:40,040 --> 00:07:42,480 Speaker 1: shoes and we don't know all the ingredients to that dish. 138 00:07:42,720 --> 00:07:47,200 Speaker 1: That's right, what it like? I said, Many couples have agreements, Okay, 139 00:07:47,560 --> 00:07:49,800 Speaker 1: my my man and I have an agreement that hey, 140 00:07:49,840 --> 00:07:54,040 Speaker 1: if one of those cheats, it's over. Okay, that's our deal. 141 00:07:54,240 --> 00:07:57,400 Speaker 1: But I don't know Ashley and her partner's day to day. 142 00:07:57,480 --> 00:07:59,920 Speaker 1: They clearly made agreement. She had no trouble sharing. It 143 00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:03,720 Speaker 1: should no trouble sharing what that agreement was, and now 144 00:08:03,880 --> 00:08:10,600 Speaker 1: it's changed okay, him to change. Okay. Also, also there's 145 00:08:10,640 --> 00:08:14,280 Speaker 1: another character in this story, which is the show. So 146 00:08:14,360 --> 00:08:18,480 Speaker 1: now you're bringing this onto a show, and sometimes you're 147 00:08:18,520 --> 00:08:21,360 Speaker 1: reacting how you truthfully react if you're a really great 148 00:08:21,840 --> 00:08:25,360 Speaker 1: house if it's challenging to do. But sometimes you're also 149 00:08:25,760 --> 00:08:29,080 Speaker 1: reacting in a way because you're also talking to us 150 00:08:29,120 --> 00:08:31,400 Speaker 1: the audience. You're talking to your partner, you're talking to 151 00:08:31,480 --> 00:08:34,079 Speaker 1: some girls that are judging about it, and you're talking 152 00:08:34,080 --> 00:08:37,400 Speaker 1: to the audience. But understand that women on this particular show, 153 00:08:37,440 --> 00:08:40,360 Speaker 1: and we'll get into the housewives overall, and is this 154 00:08:41,080 --> 00:08:46,480 Speaker 1: okay in the grand scheme and pop culture what these 155 00:08:46,480 --> 00:08:50,760 Speaker 1: shows bring out in women. But when you're on these shows, 156 00:08:51,320 --> 00:08:53,760 Speaker 1: it's a zero sum games. Somebody's always winning and somebody's 157 00:08:53,760 --> 00:08:56,800 Speaker 1: always losing. So having this sort of a gem for 158 00:08:56,840 --> 00:08:59,920 Speaker 1: all the other women, it's like a feeding frenzy. It's 159 00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:03,160 Speaker 1: like they're coming like parasites onto the main host to 160 00:09:03,280 --> 00:09:07,040 Speaker 1: like rip it it, tear at it. And Ashley handled 161 00:09:07,120 --> 00:09:09,640 Speaker 1: it perfectly because whether it's exactly what's going on in 162 00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:11,680 Speaker 1: her relationship or what she did as a character on 163 00:09:11,720 --> 00:09:13,880 Speaker 1: a show, she walked in and she cut it off 164 00:09:13,880 --> 00:09:16,360 Speaker 1: at the pass, just like Danielle when the table got fliped, 165 00:09:16,360 --> 00:09:18,040 Speaker 1: she walked in, was like, Hi, here's the book about 166 00:09:18,080 --> 00:09:20,599 Speaker 1: me being arrested. She walked in and as she walked in, 167 00:09:20,679 --> 00:09:22,960 Speaker 1: was like, Hi, it's on the table. Here it is. 168 00:09:23,160 --> 00:09:26,839 Speaker 1: Let's get into it. And it cleared, which is shocking it. 169 00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:28,920 Speaker 1: I thought so too, because I've seen it when it 170 00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:31,679 Speaker 1: don't clear, like you just mentioned Denise Richards and did 171 00:09:31,720 --> 00:09:34,760 Speaker 1: Brandy Glanville did not clear. It did not clear, and 172 00:09:34,880 --> 00:09:38,440 Speaker 1: Carol Radswell book did not clear. You're so right, Oh, 173 00:09:38,440 --> 00:09:42,520 Speaker 1: I forgot about that. It's cleared fast not And because 174 00:09:42,559 --> 00:09:45,440 Speaker 1: she nippick at the budge to care it right then, 175 00:09:45,559 --> 00:09:50,160 Speaker 1: and and notice how she kept her calm. Yes, she 176 00:09:50,200 --> 00:09:52,600 Speaker 1: didn't take the bait. He did not, and boy did 177 00:09:52,720 --> 00:09:55,520 Speaker 1: is that? Hey, that's a lesson for all of us 178 00:09:55,600 --> 00:09:58,800 Speaker 1: when when you are being challenged with something that is 179 00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:01,920 Speaker 1: your authentic true And I believe it is her authentic truth. 180 00:10:02,040 --> 00:10:03,640 Speaker 1: Just because I watched the show from the beginning and 181 00:10:03,679 --> 00:10:07,280 Speaker 1: I kind of saw how the relationship. I got a 182 00:10:07,320 --> 00:10:09,280 Speaker 1: good gut instinct about her. I don't know anything. I 183 00:10:09,320 --> 00:10:11,520 Speaker 1: liked it a lot. I did with you. I'm with you, 184 00:10:11,720 --> 00:10:13,160 Speaker 1: but you're right, it's a lesson of how to handle 185 00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:16,000 Speaker 1: yourself in business and a meeting and a conflict is 186 00:10:16,040 --> 00:10:19,040 Speaker 1: when you learn your greatest lessons. Like it's it's when 187 00:10:19,040 --> 00:10:20,960 Speaker 1: you're it's when the heat is on. It's like you 188 00:10:21,080 --> 00:10:23,760 Speaker 1: gotta not gripped that steering wheel too tight and you 189 00:10:23,800 --> 00:10:26,440 Speaker 1: can't let go. You gotta just maneuver the vehicle, which 190 00:10:26,480 --> 00:10:29,599 Speaker 1: is what she was doing. And I thought it was fascinating. 191 00:10:30,160 --> 00:10:33,360 Speaker 1: But the other conversation that we can have is that 192 00:10:33,679 --> 00:10:36,880 Speaker 1: I agree with what you said. In the beginning, relationships 193 00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:39,720 Speaker 1: evolved and change. I'm in a long distance relationship. In 194 00:10:39,760 --> 00:10:42,439 Speaker 1: the beginning, we strangled the calendar. We wanted every single 195 00:10:42,440 --> 00:10:44,320 Speaker 1: box to be filled with us being together every single 196 00:10:44,360 --> 00:10:46,960 Speaker 1: time we could. It was perfect math. Every minute I 197 00:10:47,000 --> 00:10:49,960 Speaker 1: can get there, you could get here. Well, business got 198 00:10:50,000 --> 00:10:52,120 Speaker 1: in the way, My daughter got in the way. Wanting 199 00:10:52,160 --> 00:10:54,480 Speaker 1: to lay and stare at the ceiling and and not 200 00:10:54,559 --> 00:10:56,640 Speaker 1: go anywhere got in the way, and we ended up 201 00:10:56,679 --> 00:10:59,640 Speaker 1: evolving as to what we had as a formula that 202 00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:01,920 Speaker 1: had to work. We could only work if we like 203 00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:05,040 Speaker 1: glued it all together. And we evolved and we became 204 00:11:05,040 --> 00:11:07,760 Speaker 1: more mature and realized we like time alone and we 205 00:11:07,880 --> 00:11:10,240 Speaker 1: like our own lives and our lives together and our 206 00:11:10,280 --> 00:11:13,400 Speaker 1: lives and our own kids, like it became a new recipe. 207 00:11:14,040 --> 00:11:16,160 Speaker 1: And what can I just say? I mean, I have 208 00:11:16,240 --> 00:11:18,679 Speaker 1: followed your journey and I don't know. I only know 209 00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:23,000 Speaker 1: what the public sees. So you know, God bless you 210 00:11:23,080 --> 00:11:28,560 Speaker 1: a he Gods be the most important thing that you've 211 00:11:28,600 --> 00:11:31,000 Speaker 1: done with your life. And you know, I don't want 212 00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:33,040 Speaker 1: to get into it too much because I have too 213 00:11:33,120 --> 00:11:36,760 Speaker 1: much respect for you to talk about your child, but 214 00:11:37,000 --> 00:11:39,400 Speaker 1: to watch her grow just like a public I just 215 00:11:39,400 --> 00:11:43,360 Speaker 1: watched her and be such it so just darling, and 216 00:11:44,120 --> 00:11:47,240 Speaker 1: you're obviously a good mom. But it brings up the 217 00:11:47,360 --> 00:11:51,160 Speaker 1: question of how much are these women in potomach and 218 00:11:51,240 --> 00:11:54,000 Speaker 1: all of them willing to show the real That's the 219 00:11:54,080 --> 00:11:56,559 Speaker 1: question you brought up, which I like, is how much 220 00:11:56,559 --> 00:11:59,520 Speaker 1: are they willing to be? Like when I hear in 221 00:11:59,559 --> 00:12:02,520 Speaker 1: a re union. I don't know if I'm getting off 222 00:12:02,559 --> 00:12:04,800 Speaker 1: topic here, but no, no, this is this is a 223 00:12:04,840 --> 00:12:07,240 Speaker 1: show about the whole experience, Like it's not about Yeah, 224 00:12:07,240 --> 00:12:09,880 Speaker 1: it's not about these particular women only when I hear 225 00:12:09,880 --> 00:12:12,640 Speaker 1: in a in a reunion, Well, you know, in the 226 00:12:12,720 --> 00:12:14,840 Speaker 1: scene you were it wasn't what was supposed to be 227 00:12:14,840 --> 00:12:18,280 Speaker 1: about I get so mad because as an actor, and 228 00:12:18,360 --> 00:12:22,959 Speaker 1: pardon me, I hope this isn't as an actor, I'm thinking, No, y'all, 229 00:12:23,320 --> 00:12:25,800 Speaker 1: scenes is when the dialogue is written. You memorize that 230 00:12:25,800 --> 00:12:28,000 Speaker 1: you have your intention, you know why you're moving there, 231 00:12:28,360 --> 00:12:31,800 Speaker 1: you have relationships, you dig deep about character. That's not 232 00:12:31,840 --> 00:12:34,760 Speaker 1: what y'all are doing. So but it's funny that you 233 00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:37,040 Speaker 1: say that because it started off and I'm not kidding 234 00:12:37,040 --> 00:12:39,160 Speaker 1: you because I've been through. I was there, and I 235 00:12:39,200 --> 00:12:40,959 Speaker 1: talked about this all the time when we were doing 236 00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:43,880 Speaker 1: our own makeup, sitting at our own ugly clothes, and 237 00:12:44,200 --> 00:12:47,400 Speaker 1: watched it evolve into coming back after leaving three seasons, 238 00:12:47,400 --> 00:12:50,240 Speaker 1: and people had glam squads up in the Berkshires, when who, 239 00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:52,520 Speaker 1: no one's in the Berkshires. We're not seeing anyone. So 240 00:12:52,559 --> 00:12:55,120 Speaker 1: then I started watching Denise Richards come in in shorts, 241 00:12:55,160 --> 00:12:57,520 Speaker 1: which is normal on a vacation and you've gone with 242 00:12:57,559 --> 00:13:00,560 Speaker 1: the end ball gowns. But but she I keep up 243 00:13:00,559 --> 00:13:02,400 Speaker 1: because she has to go that way because otherwise she's 244 00:13:02,400 --> 00:13:05,440 Speaker 1: gonna look like a frump because they're all wearing so 245 00:13:05,440 --> 00:13:09,120 Speaker 1: so the worm turned because there were five housewives when 246 00:13:09,120 --> 00:13:11,600 Speaker 1: I started, ten housewives when I started another have been 247 00:13:11,640 --> 00:13:15,360 Speaker 1: a hundred and forty five, So we didn't have I 248 00:13:15,440 --> 00:13:18,320 Speaker 1: never heard the term storyline. I even used my self 249 00:13:18,520 --> 00:13:21,760 Speaker 1: term character. We never had character, and we didn't say 250 00:13:22,160 --> 00:13:26,280 Speaker 1: a scene because it's it was. It just wasn't that. 251 00:13:26,440 --> 00:13:29,840 Speaker 1: It was really more real. And that's why you know, 252 00:13:31,200 --> 00:13:33,280 Speaker 1: me and Kelly with I'm up here, yere down here 253 00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:37,559 Speaker 1: was a subtle moment because it wasn't this giant produced 254 00:13:37,559 --> 00:13:40,679 Speaker 1: thing and that self produced. It's just it's a combination 255 00:13:40,720 --> 00:13:44,160 Speaker 1: of the producers have to have to elevate the game, 256 00:13:44,480 --> 00:13:46,800 Speaker 1: and the women have come in with a preconceived notion 257 00:13:46,800 --> 00:13:48,720 Speaker 1: because they've seen all the other episodes of all the 258 00:13:48,720 --> 00:13:50,920 Speaker 1: other shows before they go on were they're going to. 259 00:13:51,840 --> 00:13:54,280 Speaker 1: When I hear the word agenda, she had an agenda, 260 00:13:54,520 --> 00:13:56,959 Speaker 1: I'm like, I'm stay to see that. And then when 261 00:13:56,960 --> 00:13:59,440 Speaker 1: I hear the word storyline, as you brought up, the 262 00:13:59,559 --> 00:14:03,960 Speaker 1: irritates me because I'm like, wait, am I getting played? Yeah? 263 00:14:03,960 --> 00:14:07,440 Speaker 1: But but Bethany yet yet? I still watch. And because 264 00:14:07,440 --> 00:14:12,000 Speaker 1: it's a combination hybrid, because I'm an actress actor, I 265 00:14:12,040 --> 00:14:14,679 Speaker 1: do know when I'm being played too, So I just 266 00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:16,640 Speaker 1: go along with it until I get until I get 267 00:14:16,640 --> 00:14:18,400 Speaker 1: to the real stuff. And one of the reasons why 268 00:14:18,520 --> 00:14:22,360 Speaker 1: I like Salt Lake City is because I'm not seeing 269 00:14:22,680 --> 00:14:25,960 Speaker 1: or hearing those kinds of words. Well, that's why when 270 00:14:25,960 --> 00:14:28,680 Speaker 1: I say that Orange County is messy and Jersey is messy, 271 00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:32,240 Speaker 1: it's because it's not self produced. Beverly Hills is self produced. 272 00:14:32,280 --> 00:14:34,800 Speaker 1: I've seen it. I've been there. They're controlling themselves. They're 273 00:14:34,840 --> 00:14:38,520 Speaker 1: really concerned about how to play the game and manipulating 274 00:14:38,560 --> 00:14:40,960 Speaker 1: the system because they can, because they have massive houses 275 00:14:40,960 --> 00:14:43,040 Speaker 1: and great bags and can get away with a lot 276 00:14:43,040 --> 00:14:45,760 Speaker 1: of logos and things like that to to to drive it. 277 00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:48,000 Speaker 1: And but it will always catch up with you. What 278 00:14:48,040 --> 00:14:50,880 Speaker 1: I mean is something will always happened on you. Well, 279 00:14:50,880 --> 00:14:53,000 Speaker 1: it turns on you. But also the story will always 280 00:14:53,040 --> 00:14:56,400 Speaker 1: come through and something will end up happening, and so 281 00:14:57,160 --> 00:14:59,360 Speaker 1: the game starts to move too fast. You can't really 282 00:15:00,160 --> 00:15:02,520 Speaker 1: control this car that long. You can try for certain 283 00:15:02,560 --> 00:15:05,920 Speaker 1: moments that you're sensing on camera, but you can't. You 284 00:15:05,960 --> 00:15:08,160 Speaker 1: can't control this whole process. It just doesn't work. It will. 285 00:15:08,160 --> 00:15:10,760 Speaker 1: It will drive you, so don't worry. It all comes out. 286 00:15:10,800 --> 00:15:13,720 Speaker 1: But but the messier shows are the ones where the 287 00:15:13,760 --> 00:15:17,080 Speaker 1: people like Teresa or Nani or Vicky. The people that 288 00:15:17,120 --> 00:15:19,360 Speaker 1: I put on my Mount Rushmore, the people that I 289 00:15:19,360 --> 00:15:21,520 Speaker 1: put on my Mount Rushmore are not because they're perfect 290 00:15:21,520 --> 00:15:23,320 Speaker 1: and not because everybody might like them the most. It's 291 00:15:23,320 --> 00:15:26,320 Speaker 1: because they really were just real and not so for 292 00:15:26,440 --> 00:15:30,800 Speaker 1: being true authentic. Right, even Porsche who's a phenomenal housewife, 293 00:15:30,840 --> 00:15:35,160 Speaker 1: it's very like elaborate and very glamorous and it's not 294 00:15:35,320 --> 00:15:38,440 Speaker 1: the same. So that's just my definition of a Rushmore. Um, 295 00:15:38,520 --> 00:15:43,000 Speaker 1: I agree. I agree. So now you go into that 296 00:15:43,040 --> 00:15:46,080 Speaker 1: word mom shame and it wasn't even correctly used, but 297 00:15:46,120 --> 00:15:51,120 Speaker 1: I did understand the meaning. Um uh. It was Monique, 298 00:15:51,280 --> 00:15:57,120 Speaker 1: who Who's Monique said to Candice, you wouldn't understand because 299 00:15:57,160 --> 00:15:59,560 Speaker 1: you don't have kids, those throwaway comments that you're dissing 300 00:15:59,600 --> 00:16:02,120 Speaker 1: someone else it doesn't have kids, which is like age shaming. 301 00:16:02,360 --> 00:16:04,880 Speaker 1: It was. It was like reverse mom shaming. I would 302 00:16:04,880 --> 00:16:07,760 Speaker 1: call it. I thought it was below the bell. I 303 00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:10,920 Speaker 1: did say. I didn't. I don't have children, but I 304 00:16:11,000 --> 00:16:14,600 Speaker 1: have kids that I mentor and that means something to 305 00:16:14,680 --> 00:16:17,160 Speaker 1: me and that I have an opinion on because I 306 00:16:17,200 --> 00:16:20,360 Speaker 1: helped raise them. Okay, and I can have an opinion. 307 00:16:20,640 --> 00:16:22,600 Speaker 1: You don't have to have a child to get you 308 00:16:22,640 --> 00:16:24,600 Speaker 1: were a child. Like you know what I'm saying. You 309 00:16:24,640 --> 00:16:28,720 Speaker 1: can have an opinion on something that that that you 310 00:16:28,800 --> 00:16:31,520 Speaker 1: don't directly experience. But it was also even if you 311 00:16:31,560 --> 00:16:33,960 Speaker 1: didn't have an even if even if a person who's 312 00:16:33,960 --> 00:16:37,400 Speaker 1: not a mom doesn't exactly you understand, that's a dig. 313 00:16:37,800 --> 00:16:40,280 Speaker 1: It's a dig. It was like a z and someone 314 00:16:40,280 --> 00:16:43,080 Speaker 1: can't control it either. It's like calling someone ugly because 315 00:16:43,080 --> 00:16:45,400 Speaker 1: there's nothing you could do, like they are saying your 316 00:16:45,440 --> 00:16:47,640 Speaker 1: teeth and it's just so mean because it's like there's 317 00:16:47,680 --> 00:17:00,240 Speaker 1: nothing to say to it. Now we gotta now we 318 00:17:00,240 --> 00:17:03,520 Speaker 1: get again into it. So everybody's calm and rational about 319 00:17:04,040 --> 00:17:07,160 Speaker 1: you know, about having three ways and men and their 320 00:17:07,280 --> 00:17:10,360 Speaker 1: underwear with with women in in in the room and 321 00:17:10,480 --> 00:17:13,280 Speaker 1: what was it a hooker? Is that we're yeah, I 322 00:17:13,280 --> 00:17:15,520 Speaker 1: mean they're not they're not saying that, but they allude 323 00:17:15,520 --> 00:17:19,440 Speaker 1: to that that it's a hooker. And we this girl, 324 00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:23,280 Speaker 1: this this person, what sold the pictures? Granted him out. 325 00:17:23,320 --> 00:17:26,399 Speaker 1: That's what happened she did, Okay, that's what That's what 326 00:17:26,800 --> 00:17:28,720 Speaker 1: Ashley is saying that she she she knew what she 327 00:17:28,760 --> 00:17:31,680 Speaker 1: was doing with her husband. The lady knew what she 328 00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:35,159 Speaker 1: was doing. Okay, Well, great. Of course nothing to do 329 00:17:35,200 --> 00:17:37,480 Speaker 1: with him, and of course he's guilt free. But I mean, 330 00:17:38,240 --> 00:17:41,679 Speaker 1: let's not forget that. No, Okay, So I'm I'm so 331 00:17:41,720 --> 00:17:44,840 Speaker 1: impressed by the rationale here and everybody's so mature, and 332 00:17:44,880 --> 00:17:51,560 Speaker 1: then the ship goes sideways. So I I mean, we're 333 00:17:51,560 --> 00:17:54,120 Speaker 1: going to talk about this normally, but it's not even 334 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:56,280 Speaker 1: supposed to be talked about normally because it's totally so 335 00:17:56,400 --> 00:17:58,640 Speaker 1: unacceptable for women to be acting this way. And we're 336 00:17:58,640 --> 00:18:01,119 Speaker 1: gonna get Candy on in a minute to talk about this, 337 00:18:01,160 --> 00:18:05,960 Speaker 1: but let's just get started. So Monique the way, the 338 00:18:06,240 --> 00:18:10,479 Speaker 1: way that I saw it is that Monique is in 339 00:18:10,640 --> 00:18:13,680 Speaker 1: Candice's face, but they're both taunting each other. I don't 340 00:18:13,680 --> 00:18:16,000 Speaker 1: I see it like they're poking each other for sure 341 00:18:16,760 --> 00:18:19,400 Speaker 1: right there too, Like you know they're they're poking each other, 342 00:18:20,119 --> 00:18:23,600 Speaker 1: and she says, what do you want to drag me? 343 00:18:23,680 --> 00:18:26,399 Speaker 1: Like they know they're on TV, they know they're in 344 00:18:26,400 --> 00:18:28,320 Speaker 1: a scene, they know it's getting crazy, and they really 345 00:18:28,320 --> 00:18:32,000 Speaker 1: are like intoxicated by the wine, by the scene, by 346 00:18:32,040 --> 00:18:36,720 Speaker 1: the moment, and it's just it's just it's just escalating. Right, 347 00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:42,480 Speaker 1: So Monique was holding onto Candice's hair. They didn't seem 348 00:18:42,520 --> 00:18:45,480 Speaker 1: to be able to let go and what like why 349 00:18:45,520 --> 00:18:47,760 Speaker 1: because it was that's like the competition was right there, 350 00:18:47,800 --> 00:18:50,600 Speaker 1: like they were holding on. Get the feeling. And I 351 00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:53,520 Speaker 1: could be wrong, but I get the feeling. Monique, that's 352 00:18:53,560 --> 00:18:56,639 Speaker 1: one not to cross. Here's what I thought. Here's what 353 00:18:56,720 --> 00:18:58,480 Speaker 1: I thought. And I could be saying this all wrong. 354 00:18:59,040 --> 00:19:03,280 Speaker 1: Candice is is this cute little pageant girl and very 355 00:19:03,400 --> 00:19:06,840 Speaker 1: very smart by the way, and she's probably doing the scene. 356 00:19:07,000 --> 00:19:10,160 Speaker 1: This is what I gathered him. She was the scene 357 00:19:11,359 --> 00:19:15,480 Speaker 1: and I think Monique went, hey, the scene is done 358 00:19:15,960 --> 00:19:18,920 Speaker 1: like I've never seen. I've never seen that on all 359 00:19:18,960 --> 00:19:22,200 Speaker 1: of the Housewives. I've seen Ninie, I've seen say, I've 360 00:19:22,240 --> 00:19:25,439 Speaker 1: seen Kim Zolziac with with that. We've situation in the 361 00:19:25,480 --> 00:19:27,800 Speaker 1: street with I think it was I don't know who 362 00:19:27,840 --> 00:19:30,240 Speaker 1: was pulling each other's hair, but like this was I've 363 00:19:30,280 --> 00:19:34,159 Speaker 1: seen him n I think right, I've seen that situation 364 00:19:34,240 --> 00:19:37,119 Speaker 1: in the closet with Nini and the camera guys, and 365 00:19:37,119 --> 00:19:41,320 Speaker 1: I've seen Ramona with the wine glass and Kim Richards 366 00:19:41,320 --> 00:19:43,520 Speaker 1: and Lisa Renna with the wine glass and it was 367 00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:50,000 Speaker 1: next level. Yeah, because of the because of them, the repeat, 368 00:19:50,280 --> 00:19:52,640 Speaker 1: she wanted to go back Here's what I thought when 369 00:19:52,680 --> 00:19:56,080 Speaker 1: I saw it, Um, she's going to go back. I 370 00:19:56,160 --> 00:19:59,480 Speaker 1: don't think Monique felt like she was being heard. And 371 00:19:59,520 --> 00:20:02,520 Speaker 1: then I think Candice in the background, you'd hear her 372 00:20:02,800 --> 00:20:05,560 Speaker 1: still name calling when they're pulled apart. I mean, they're 373 00:20:05,560 --> 00:20:08,120 Speaker 1: both doing it, but Monique is standing in the hallway, 374 00:20:08,200 --> 00:20:10,400 Speaker 1: you know, she's standing in the hallway waiting and listening 375 00:20:10,800 --> 00:20:14,760 Speaker 1: with the producer, and Candice is still call her name. 376 00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:18,480 Speaker 1: And that's what Monique was gonna leave, and she still 377 00:20:18,480 --> 00:20:21,920 Speaker 1: hears Candice. Candice is still calling her name, and that's why. 378 00:20:22,480 --> 00:20:23,600 Speaker 1: And I don't know if she was going to go 379 00:20:23,640 --> 00:20:25,280 Speaker 1: to hit her or anything. I think she just wanted 380 00:20:25,320 --> 00:20:28,159 Speaker 1: to still have that Hey listen, I can still hear you. 381 00:20:28,359 --> 00:20:30,560 Speaker 1: And I also think she probably wanted to be on camera, like, 382 00:20:30,760 --> 00:20:35,800 Speaker 1: do y'all hear this? Do y'all hear this? Does that 383 00:20:35,880 --> 00:20:40,919 Speaker 1: make say? It does? Now? I heard that they sued 384 00:20:40,960 --> 00:20:44,280 Speaker 1: each other, which is a joke because they both it's ridiculous. 385 00:20:44,400 --> 00:20:46,800 Speaker 1: And also I don't even think that's allowed in your contract. 386 00:20:46,800 --> 00:20:48,840 Speaker 1: I think, like you can't sue someone else, but it 387 00:20:48,840 --> 00:20:51,760 Speaker 1: doesn't matter. Anybody can do anything, body for anything. And 388 00:20:52,359 --> 00:20:55,159 Speaker 1: I also I heard that they sued each other, but 389 00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:59,080 Speaker 1: I heard that um Monique ended up. And this is 390 00:20:59,080 --> 00:21:01,760 Speaker 1: the thing. Sometimes people apologize not because it's what they 391 00:21:01,800 --> 00:21:03,240 Speaker 1: thought was wrong in the moment, it's because of how 392 00:21:03,280 --> 00:21:05,960 Speaker 1: the audience reacted, which is a positive about the show 393 00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:08,800 Speaker 1: because someone gets to really reflect on how most people 394 00:21:08,800 --> 00:21:11,600 Speaker 1: would see your behavior. So I guess the audience if 395 00:21:11,640 --> 00:21:14,800 Speaker 1: they're like you, and I reacted that and it's not 396 00:21:14,880 --> 00:21:17,680 Speaker 1: fair because both of them were so wrong, but Monique 397 00:21:17,720 --> 00:21:21,480 Speaker 1: took it to another level something. Yeah, this is when 398 00:21:21,520 --> 00:21:24,000 Speaker 1: your mother tells you your whole life or your father, 399 00:21:24,160 --> 00:21:29,840 Speaker 1: whoever says, how you react is going to be character telling. 400 00:21:30,480 --> 00:21:33,800 Speaker 1: And in the beginning of Potomac, one of my favorites 401 00:21:34,040 --> 00:21:36,960 Speaker 1: was Monique. One of my favorites was going to I 402 00:21:37,000 --> 00:21:41,520 Speaker 1: liked everything about her. When that and Canvas kind of, 403 00:21:41,880 --> 00:21:46,120 Speaker 1: you know, graded on me a little bit. It's horrible, 404 00:21:46,160 --> 00:21:50,400 Speaker 1: but especially how how I've seen her grow and evolved. 405 00:21:52,960 --> 00:21:58,199 Speaker 1: In that moment, for some reason, my opinion changed, and 406 00:21:58,240 --> 00:22:01,360 Speaker 1: I felt badly because I thought Monique was the one 407 00:22:01,400 --> 00:22:05,160 Speaker 1: I liked so much, and now I have this feeling 408 00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:08,440 Speaker 1: about her that I don't I can't shake. I got 409 00:22:08,560 --> 00:22:10,840 Speaker 1: over it because I saw her like reflect And I 410 00:22:10,880 --> 00:22:12,119 Speaker 1: don't know if it was part of the shar or not, 411 00:22:12,160 --> 00:22:15,040 Speaker 1: but I really feel like I saw her family come 412 00:22:15,080 --> 00:22:17,479 Speaker 1: together and surround her. I loved that. I loved her 413 00:22:17,520 --> 00:22:20,840 Speaker 1: husband coming to say. You know she could she snapped, 414 00:22:20,880 --> 00:22:24,440 Speaker 1: and you know her husband protected her, and her husband 415 00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:27,119 Speaker 1: said we will not do this name calling thing. And 416 00:22:27,119 --> 00:22:28,639 Speaker 1: I love it when he said at the union, I 417 00:22:28,720 --> 00:22:32,480 Speaker 1: play check not checkers. Well, thank you. I say that 418 00:22:32,480 --> 00:22:35,240 Speaker 1: all the time. Well, it's funny that you said. So. 419 00:22:35,520 --> 00:22:37,159 Speaker 1: People make mistakes all the time. And I was just 420 00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:39,160 Speaker 1: talking to a business owner who made a big mistake, 421 00:22:39,359 --> 00:22:42,720 Speaker 1: and um, I said to them, and I still don't 422 00:22:42,760 --> 00:22:45,840 Speaker 1: think they handled the mistake properly. And I said, listen, 423 00:22:45,880 --> 00:22:48,119 Speaker 1: I'm not immune to mistakes as a business owner. Anybody 424 00:22:48,160 --> 00:22:50,119 Speaker 1: can make a mistake. How do you handle it? And 425 00:22:50,160 --> 00:22:51,960 Speaker 1: I say this to my daughter all the time. You 426 00:22:52,000 --> 00:22:54,520 Speaker 1: can be right and make yourself wrong so quickly you 427 00:22:54,560 --> 00:22:58,960 Speaker 1: can be totally right and become wrong. So this jumped 428 00:22:59,040 --> 00:23:02,520 Speaker 1: the shark. And I have never seen I've never seen 429 00:23:02,560 --> 00:23:05,199 Speaker 1: women act like this. And how your parents told you 430 00:23:05,240 --> 00:23:08,800 Speaker 1: to behave and you can't be an adult behaving in 431 00:23:08,840 --> 00:23:10,359 Speaker 1: a way that you learned as a child. We're just 432 00:23:10,359 --> 00:23:12,879 Speaker 1: not allowed. I acted the way that I saw at 433 00:23:12,880 --> 00:23:16,520 Speaker 1: the race track. People think I'm abrasive now what I've 434 00:23:16,560 --> 00:23:19,920 Speaker 1: lived through as a child, abuse and alcoholism and gambling 435 00:23:19,920 --> 00:23:23,000 Speaker 1: in the race track is not fit, and I'd be 436 00:23:23,119 --> 00:23:24,600 Speaker 1: I'd be right in there with the two of them, 437 00:23:24,640 --> 00:23:27,240 Speaker 1: because I have gotten into fistifights of people in my life. 438 00:23:27,280 --> 00:23:29,680 Speaker 1: I have. You know, I I know, and I hear 439 00:23:29,760 --> 00:23:31,600 Speaker 1: you and I think where I struggle and this is 440 00:23:31,640 --> 00:23:34,880 Speaker 1: where Candy can help help us talk about it is 441 00:23:35,040 --> 00:23:38,800 Speaker 1: because I had a picture. The way Monique presented herself 442 00:23:39,119 --> 00:23:44,040 Speaker 1: was class act. I do good for others, and I 443 00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:45,800 Speaker 1: still think she does by the way I think she hear. 444 00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:49,960 Speaker 1: Her heart's in the right place, I think. But when 445 00:23:50,000 --> 00:23:54,679 Speaker 1: that happened, I started questioning my right. That was just 446 00:23:54,760 --> 00:24:00,159 Speaker 1: pretend and the truth is the real. But back to 447 00:24:00,359 --> 00:24:02,080 Speaker 1: being a parent or not being a parent. When you 448 00:24:02,119 --> 00:24:05,000 Speaker 1: saw her in the scene really close after, when you 449 00:24:05,040 --> 00:24:08,280 Speaker 1: saw her washing her cute, adorable daughter's hair in the 450 00:24:08,320 --> 00:24:11,000 Speaker 1: sink with the husband who's the football player, you thought 451 00:24:11,080 --> 00:24:13,840 Speaker 1: she's a mother. The first thought I had was you 452 00:24:13,880 --> 00:24:16,679 Speaker 1: are a role model, and that you're even talking to 453 00:24:16,720 --> 00:24:18,480 Speaker 1: your husband about this in front of your daughter, and 454 00:24:18,480 --> 00:24:21,200 Speaker 1: they are sponges. So your daughter knows what you're talking about. 455 00:24:21,560 --> 00:24:23,639 Speaker 1: And there's a conversation in your house about you beating 456 00:24:23,680 --> 00:24:26,560 Speaker 1: the ship out of another woman and you have a daughter, 457 00:24:27,000 --> 00:24:31,399 Speaker 1: and like, how's that cycle not going to continue beyond? 458 00:24:31,520 --> 00:24:33,399 Speaker 1: It was the worst one. It's the worst example to 459 00:24:33,400 --> 00:24:35,800 Speaker 1: step for a child and her husband. You could tell 460 00:24:35,880 --> 00:24:38,080 Speaker 1: he totally disagree with her. Even with her telling the 461 00:24:38,119 --> 00:24:40,840 Speaker 1: story from her perspective, her husband disagreed, and I think 462 00:24:40,840 --> 00:24:44,080 Speaker 1: you should have been even firmer, like absolutely not, no, 463 00:24:44,240 --> 00:24:46,840 Speaker 1: thank you. That is unacceptable. You laid your hands on 464 00:24:46,880 --> 00:24:49,959 Speaker 1: somebody else and that's unacceptable. So it's handy it, you know, 465 00:24:50,119 --> 00:24:52,359 Speaker 1: Like that scene, to me, it was like he was 466 00:24:52,440 --> 00:24:56,879 Speaker 1: letting her know on her show that it's not acceptable 467 00:24:56,920 --> 00:25:12,000 Speaker 1: the way she behaved. Is Candy here, she's here, Okay, Hi, Candy, Hi, 468 00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:16,720 Speaker 1: I love you. What's up? How y'all doing. I told 469 00:25:16,960 --> 00:25:20,000 Speaker 1: Kristen that I was watching this episode that I know 470 00:25:20,080 --> 00:25:21,760 Speaker 1: you haven't seen, but you've seen the clips, and I 471 00:25:21,800 --> 00:25:24,640 Speaker 1: thought to myself, I have an opinion on what happened. 472 00:25:24,680 --> 00:25:27,640 Speaker 1: I'm not blind. But the next scene that we're about 473 00:25:27,680 --> 00:25:29,959 Speaker 1: to discuss in the next topic on the show, I 474 00:25:30,080 --> 00:25:33,600 Speaker 1: don't have a clear opinion on. So what I was 475 00:25:33,640 --> 00:25:36,960 Speaker 1: saying is that, you know, some of the messier shows 476 00:25:36,960 --> 00:25:39,800 Speaker 1: like Orange County can get really messy, and Jersey to me, 477 00:25:39,840 --> 00:25:42,280 Speaker 1: can get really messy. And Atlanta is half messy, half 478 00:25:42,520 --> 00:25:46,080 Speaker 1: half messy and half like the Beverly Hills polish where 479 00:25:46,080 --> 00:25:51,840 Speaker 1: people are you know, fronting and stunted. No, but sometimes 480 00:25:51,880 --> 00:25:54,760 Speaker 1: I think, like I think like Nini was messy, but Porscha, 481 00:25:55,240 --> 00:25:58,760 Speaker 1: you know, it's all the beautiful gone with the wind, 482 00:25:58,960 --> 00:26:00,800 Speaker 1: you know, dresses in the can. You like, there's just 483 00:26:00,840 --> 00:26:03,680 Speaker 1: a different vibe. Meaning I find that Orange County they'll 484 00:26:03,720 --> 00:26:06,760 Speaker 1: just say absolutely anything at all times, and I feel 485 00:26:06,800 --> 00:26:09,399 Speaker 1: like Atlanta is always my favorite, but it can be 486 00:26:09,440 --> 00:26:11,560 Speaker 1: messy and it can be polished. So I hadn't seen 487 00:26:11,600 --> 00:26:14,200 Speaker 1: the show, and they're different. You know, Beverly Hills is 488 00:26:14,280 --> 00:26:17,000 Speaker 1: usually trying to be polished, but there have been glasses 489 00:26:17,080 --> 00:26:19,480 Speaker 1: thrown and and and there have been messy moments, but 490 00:26:19,600 --> 00:26:22,800 Speaker 1: I have not yet seen on The Housewives a scene 491 00:26:23,080 --> 00:26:27,480 Speaker 1: this messy. So there's a moment where a woman, Ashley's husband, 492 00:26:27,520 --> 00:26:30,040 Speaker 1: is caught in a room with what seems to be 493 00:26:30,080 --> 00:26:34,160 Speaker 1: a prostitute, and everybody's so rational and mature talking about it, 494 00:26:34,560 --> 00:26:36,679 Speaker 1: and I'm like, wow, these women are so polished and 495 00:26:36,720 --> 00:26:40,919 Speaker 1: like just rational. And the next minute, the next minute, 496 00:26:42,000 --> 00:26:46,840 Speaker 1: this woman Monique and Candice are literally ripping each other 497 00:26:46,880 --> 00:26:50,520 Speaker 1: worse than the Charay Kim Nini, like, worse than the 498 00:26:50,520 --> 00:26:54,080 Speaker 1: closet at Nini's house, ripping hold, ripping each other's hair out, 499 00:26:54,160 --> 00:26:57,160 Speaker 1: holding onto each other like two men in a fight 500 00:26:57,240 --> 00:27:01,080 Speaker 1: in an alley, like not like in say but and 501 00:27:01,200 --> 00:27:03,520 Speaker 1: so I just want to ject this though, Candy, I 502 00:27:03,560 --> 00:27:08,560 Speaker 1: think that what I saw is I thought, really Monique 503 00:27:08,600 --> 00:27:10,680 Speaker 1: not letting go. I mean, I think at one point 504 00:27:10,720 --> 00:27:17,720 Speaker 1: I said, definitely, okay, Yeah, it was a hair pull basically, 505 00:27:17,880 --> 00:27:19,680 Speaker 1: and she was popping her on the head while she 506 00:27:19,760 --> 00:27:22,040 Speaker 1: was pulling her hair. But it was like, really one 507 00:27:22,080 --> 00:27:25,000 Speaker 1: person was fighting, the other person was really trying to 508 00:27:25,040 --> 00:27:28,160 Speaker 1: get loose. Oh she was. She wasn't holding on too, 509 00:27:29,040 --> 00:27:36,680 Speaker 1: she was trying to get okay. And then Monique wanted 510 00:27:36,720 --> 00:27:39,520 Speaker 1: to go back in for seconds, that's she wanted to go. 511 00:27:39,680 --> 00:27:41,960 Speaker 1: That wasn't enough, and she had a bloody lip and 512 00:27:42,280 --> 00:27:44,080 Speaker 1: she wanted to go back in. Candy, and I said, 513 00:27:44,080 --> 00:27:46,080 Speaker 1: then she's in the kitchen and her husband is effectively 514 00:27:46,160 --> 00:27:49,520 Speaker 1: letting her know it's that is unacceptable. And she's got 515 00:27:49,520 --> 00:27:52,119 Speaker 1: a daughter that she's washing her daughter's hair having this conversation, 516 00:27:52,160 --> 00:27:55,520 Speaker 1: and it's so clear to me this is such a 517 00:27:55,520 --> 00:27:57,720 Speaker 1: bad example. So that's like where we are right now, 518 00:27:57,760 --> 00:28:02,560 Speaker 1: and we all disagree. Okay, So yeah, I mean but 519 00:28:02,680 --> 00:28:06,439 Speaker 1: as far as like and and I I agree with 520 00:28:06,480 --> 00:28:08,840 Speaker 1: you about what happened, as far as like, you know, 521 00:28:08,960 --> 00:28:10,840 Speaker 1: it was a bad example or whatever. But what I 522 00:28:10,880 --> 00:28:13,160 Speaker 1: don't agree on it. I feel I feel like there 523 00:28:13,200 --> 00:28:15,800 Speaker 1: have been other examples on other shows kind of like 524 00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:19,200 Speaker 1: you know, on Jersey with the Fight, they've had all 525 00:28:19,280 --> 00:28:22,960 Speaker 1: out brawls where everybody's jumping in or table flips and 526 00:28:23,359 --> 00:28:25,119 Speaker 1: you know, they really looked like they were trying to 527 00:28:25,119 --> 00:28:28,879 Speaker 1: get at each other. But to me, like this one, yeah, 528 00:28:28,920 --> 00:28:31,600 Speaker 1: she got drugs. Same thing on our show went the 529 00:28:31,680 --> 00:28:35,639 Speaker 1: year that Porsche grabbed um Kenyan snatched her and drug 530 00:28:35,640 --> 00:28:40,160 Speaker 1: her across the floor basically by her. Okay, I forgot okay, right, 531 00:28:40,400 --> 00:28:43,560 Speaker 1: I forgot about that. I forgot about that. And also 532 00:28:43,800 --> 00:28:46,400 Speaker 1: I guess what it was was that first of all, 533 00:28:46,440 --> 00:28:49,200 Speaker 1: I sort of give women more credit than men for 534 00:28:49,240 --> 00:28:51,880 Speaker 1: the fight. So at the christening or it was I 535 00:28:51,880 --> 00:28:53,960 Speaker 1: think it was a christening or it was a It 536 00:28:54,040 --> 00:28:55,480 Speaker 1: was a bunch of men like in a brawl and 537 00:28:55,520 --> 00:28:57,480 Speaker 1: other people getting involved like you see in a movie 538 00:28:57,600 --> 00:29:00,320 Speaker 1: fight or Jerry Spring as I talked about it, Um 539 00:29:00,400 --> 00:29:04,400 Speaker 1: this the intensity and such a close proximity was what 540 00:29:04,480 --> 00:29:06,320 Speaker 1: was really like riveting to me. It was just so 541 00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:09,680 Speaker 1: like tight and you could see it definitely was hurting. 542 00:29:09,680 --> 00:29:12,800 Speaker 1: It just felt very It felt very intense to me 543 00:29:13,040 --> 00:29:17,880 Speaker 1: versus like just like sloppy. You know that her Yeah, 544 00:29:18,200 --> 00:29:20,480 Speaker 1: she had on a wig and then like it probably 545 00:29:20,560 --> 00:29:24,520 Speaker 1: was hurting because I'm sure getting your your wig ripped off. 546 00:29:25,920 --> 00:29:28,560 Speaker 1: So the reason on the show, Candy, it's not really 547 00:29:28,560 --> 00:29:30,680 Speaker 1: about the episode, it's about the topic. So the reason 548 00:29:30,760 --> 00:29:33,160 Speaker 1: I wanted to talk to you is because Wendy is 549 00:29:33,200 --> 00:29:36,800 Speaker 1: saying that she's fighting so black women can have a 550 00:29:36,800 --> 00:29:39,400 Speaker 1: seat at the table, and you fought so hard to 551 00:29:39,440 --> 00:29:41,840 Speaker 1: have a seat at the table and be respected. And 552 00:29:41,880 --> 00:29:45,200 Speaker 1: this was a conversation with the Will Smith slap. I'd 553 00:29:45,240 --> 00:29:48,120 Speaker 1: never even thought of that aspect, but people were saying, 554 00:29:49,000 --> 00:29:52,000 Speaker 1: you know, this is not good for black people when 555 00:29:52,000 --> 00:29:54,160 Speaker 1: a man goes up and slap somebody, you know, on 556 00:29:54,200 --> 00:29:57,320 Speaker 1: a stage, And obviously that wasn't my first thought at all. 557 00:29:57,360 --> 00:29:59,920 Speaker 1: I didn't think of that. So that was a conversation. 558 00:30:00,160 --> 00:30:02,040 Speaker 1: And then here this woman on the show is having 559 00:30:02,120 --> 00:30:03,960 Speaker 1: this conversation saying, we thought so hard to have a 560 00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:06,719 Speaker 1: seat at the table, and this is the opposite of 561 00:30:06,720 --> 00:30:09,640 Speaker 1: what we want. And I thought to myself, well, sloppiness 562 00:30:09,680 --> 00:30:13,120 Speaker 1: has happened. Arguments have happened on Orange County and and 563 00:30:13,240 --> 00:30:16,000 Speaker 1: there's been at least throwing a glass And you know 564 00:30:16,040 --> 00:30:19,720 Speaker 1: it's not it's not obviously relegated to black women. But 565 00:30:20,360 --> 00:30:23,160 Speaker 1: if black women have fought so hard twice as hard 566 00:30:23,200 --> 00:30:26,200 Speaker 1: to get to the same place, where do you stand 567 00:30:26,240 --> 00:30:28,200 Speaker 1: on this? Like when you see this as a black 568 00:30:28,240 --> 00:30:32,280 Speaker 1: woman and you see two black women on television, two smart, 569 00:30:32,680 --> 00:30:35,720 Speaker 1: you know, beautiful women on the show that five minutes before, 570 00:30:35,760 --> 00:30:38,120 Speaker 1: I'm like thinking how rational everyone is about this, Like, 571 00:30:38,960 --> 00:30:42,320 Speaker 1: you know, three people in a relationship in this hooker situation. 572 00:30:42,400 --> 00:30:45,040 Speaker 1: And then I go to this. I instantly thought I 573 00:30:45,080 --> 00:30:47,600 Speaker 1: want to call Candy and get her take, because you 574 00:30:47,640 --> 00:30:49,760 Speaker 1: don't really lose your cool that off, and you are smart, 575 00:30:49,760 --> 00:30:56,280 Speaker 1: You're like, okay, so you speak because I mean if 576 00:30:56,280 --> 00:30:59,280 Speaker 1: we also think about the year that, um, what was 577 00:30:59,320 --> 00:31:02,680 Speaker 1: that that we at the slumber party and I told 578 00:31:02,840 --> 00:31:06,480 Speaker 1: somebody I was gonna drag her or whatever. Um, There's 579 00:31:06,520 --> 00:31:08,920 Speaker 1: definitely been moments where I definitely wanted to put my 580 00:31:08,960 --> 00:31:11,760 Speaker 1: hands on somebody in the show. Really this season where 581 00:31:11,800 --> 00:31:13,920 Speaker 1: we were filming, I wanted to put my hands somebody 582 00:31:13,960 --> 00:31:15,760 Speaker 1: on the show. It hasn't come out yet, but I 583 00:31:15,800 --> 00:31:19,240 Speaker 1: felt that way. But overall, I kind of feel like, 584 00:31:19,560 --> 00:31:24,000 Speaker 1: as black people, the difference in us and you know 585 00:31:24,040 --> 00:31:27,120 Speaker 1: everybody else, is like, black people do care about how 586 00:31:27,160 --> 00:31:31,240 Speaker 1: we're perceived in public because we feel like how one 587 00:31:31,360 --> 00:31:34,920 Speaker 1: represents as publicly affects everybody else. I think it's a 588 00:31:34,960 --> 00:31:38,160 Speaker 1: lot different with no offense with you guys, And it's 589 00:31:38,240 --> 00:31:40,600 Speaker 1: kind of like, if you know, two white women have 590 00:31:40,720 --> 00:31:43,920 Speaker 1: a fight on you know, whatever show, you don't look 591 00:31:43,960 --> 00:31:45,640 Speaker 1: at it and be like, oh, they're making all white 592 00:31:45,640 --> 00:31:49,000 Speaker 1: people look bad. But with us, if we see two 593 00:31:49,040 --> 00:31:51,160 Speaker 1: black women having a show, we're like, they're making black 594 00:31:51,160 --> 00:31:53,360 Speaker 1: women look bad. And it's because at the end of 595 00:31:53,400 --> 00:31:56,840 Speaker 1: the day, it's like we we felt like for a 596 00:31:56,920 --> 00:32:01,080 Speaker 1: very long time, we didn't have as many great representations 597 00:32:01,200 --> 00:32:04,520 Speaker 1: or our stories being showed in a better light. You know, 598 00:32:04,600 --> 00:32:08,160 Speaker 1: we were always looked at, you know, our representations that 599 00:32:08,240 --> 00:32:11,440 Speaker 1: were on television for a long time was oh the ghetto, 600 00:32:11,600 --> 00:32:15,240 Speaker 1: Oh the pimp, oh the you know, the gang person 601 00:32:15,440 --> 00:32:17,760 Speaker 1: or the bad guy in the movie are We don't 602 00:32:17,800 --> 00:32:22,880 Speaker 1: get the you know, representation of being the affluent or 603 00:32:23,240 --> 00:32:26,400 Speaker 1: the you know, or the person that's the most educated 604 00:32:26,520 --> 00:32:31,080 Speaker 1: or whatever for for a very long time. And so now, um, 605 00:32:31,120 --> 00:32:34,240 Speaker 1: now that we are on television and now reality TV 606 00:32:34,400 --> 00:32:37,720 Speaker 1: tends to show most of the negative you know, um, 607 00:32:39,200 --> 00:32:42,960 Speaker 1: black people, we don't like that because overall, you know, 608 00:32:43,040 --> 00:32:46,160 Speaker 1: we know that we get judged more more harshly than 609 00:32:46,240 --> 00:32:49,680 Speaker 1: any other race typically. You know. I know before when 610 00:32:49,720 --> 00:32:52,760 Speaker 1: I was first thinking of coming on the show a 611 00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:56,280 Speaker 1: million years ago, Uh I remember, you know, I came 612 00:32:56,320 --> 00:32:58,880 Speaker 1: in on season two, but season one had already played, 613 00:32:58,920 --> 00:33:01,280 Speaker 1: and I was talking around a group of friends and 614 00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:03,280 Speaker 1: I was saying, yeah, you know, they approached me about 615 00:33:03,280 --> 00:33:05,200 Speaker 1: being on the Real Housewives, and they were like, oh, 616 00:33:05,280 --> 00:33:07,680 Speaker 1: you should do that show. That's a bad representation of 617 00:33:07,720 --> 00:33:11,040 Speaker 1: black women, you know, all the stuff. And I said 618 00:33:11,040 --> 00:33:13,600 Speaker 1: to them, I was like, well, if you think that 619 00:33:13,600 --> 00:33:17,400 Speaker 1: that was a bad representation of black women, and you 620 00:33:17,440 --> 00:33:19,440 Speaker 1: think I'm a good representation, why would you want me 621 00:33:19,480 --> 00:33:26,960 Speaker 1: to do it? Exactly so. But overall, um, because you 622 00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:29,120 Speaker 1: want to change you want to see on TV because 623 00:33:29,160 --> 00:33:32,680 Speaker 1: you you've been seeing these characters as the gangster and 624 00:33:32,800 --> 00:33:36,160 Speaker 1: the bad person and an intelligent person, and you want 625 00:33:36,160 --> 00:33:37,800 Speaker 1: to be the change that you want to see on TV. 626 00:33:37,920 --> 00:33:40,920 Speaker 1: So that's a great reason to be on TV for you. Yes, 627 00:33:41,560 --> 00:33:43,960 Speaker 1: And I don't always you know, I mean, like I said, 628 00:33:43,960 --> 00:33:47,240 Speaker 1: I don't always hit the bar. But overall, it's like 629 00:33:47,600 --> 00:33:51,320 Speaker 1: you do want people to understand, like, okay, because if 630 00:33:51,400 --> 00:33:55,040 Speaker 1: all you're seeing is oh, the angry black woman or 631 00:33:55,120 --> 00:33:58,000 Speaker 1: this lady likes to fight or whatever. If that is 632 00:33:58,000 --> 00:34:00,680 Speaker 1: the perception that the world is seeing on a regular 633 00:34:00,760 --> 00:34:04,120 Speaker 1: basis of black women, then when it comes time to 634 00:34:04,760 --> 00:34:07,320 Speaker 1: hire that person for a certain position, you're blue. I 635 00:34:07,320 --> 00:34:09,040 Speaker 1: don't know if I want to hire because you know 636 00:34:09,440 --> 00:34:13,759 Speaker 1: they are angry. Yeah, you don't want that, you know. So, 637 00:34:14,400 --> 00:34:17,440 Speaker 1: and so I think that's why it's very important to 638 00:34:17,600 --> 00:34:20,359 Speaker 1: black people to be represented well in the public eye 639 00:34:20,400 --> 00:34:23,000 Speaker 1: because we know we always get you know, thrown in 640 00:34:23,040 --> 00:34:27,320 Speaker 1: a bunch and judged by whatever. You know, the overall 641 00:34:27,360 --> 00:34:30,279 Speaker 1: perception is a black people instead of just you know, 642 00:34:30,520 --> 00:34:33,839 Speaker 1: judging each person by that person when you meet them, 643 00:34:34,600 --> 00:34:38,040 Speaker 1: and when you so you said, so is do you 644 00:34:38,080 --> 00:34:41,880 Speaker 1: have some sort of subconscious switch that you don't switch 645 00:34:42,320 --> 00:34:44,399 Speaker 1: on when you said you wanted to put your hands 646 00:34:44,440 --> 00:34:46,160 Speaker 1: on somebody? Are you? I mean, is that is this 647 00:34:46,239 --> 00:34:48,520 Speaker 1: even possible for you to think this quickly in that moment? 648 00:34:48,600 --> 00:34:51,800 Speaker 1: Or why didn't you go off? Um? I think sometimes, 649 00:34:51,920 --> 00:34:55,480 Speaker 1: you know, sometimes we click out, right, so where a 650 00:34:55,520 --> 00:34:58,320 Speaker 1: person pushes out put buttons to the to the extent 651 00:34:58,440 --> 00:35:02,399 Speaker 1: of you know, we lose it. Everybody has a moment 652 00:35:02,440 --> 00:35:06,520 Speaker 1: where you lose it, right, But um, I think for me, 653 00:35:06,760 --> 00:35:11,080 Speaker 1: it's like once the moment is over and you know, 654 00:35:11,160 --> 00:35:12,880 Speaker 1: of course you know everybody's trying to break it up. 655 00:35:12,920 --> 00:35:16,120 Speaker 1: But then I always tell myself, in like one instance 656 00:35:16,200 --> 00:35:19,080 Speaker 1: this year, the one that I said hasn't come out yet, 657 00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:23,160 Speaker 1: I was like, I'm leaving. I'm not gonna stay here. 658 00:35:23,200 --> 00:35:25,680 Speaker 1: In the scene after the argument happened and I said 659 00:35:25,680 --> 00:35:27,680 Speaker 1: what I said, I was like, it's time for me 660 00:35:27,719 --> 00:35:30,080 Speaker 1: to go because I know I'm already at that level 661 00:35:30,120 --> 00:35:32,920 Speaker 1: of anger that if I stay it couldn't get to 662 00:35:33,000 --> 00:35:36,280 Speaker 1: that level. So let me leave because I don't want 663 00:35:36,360 --> 00:35:40,440 Speaker 1: that to be the representation that I leave you on 664 00:35:40,480 --> 00:35:44,400 Speaker 1: this show, right, So it's it's cooler minds prevail. Like 665 00:35:44,480 --> 00:35:47,360 Speaker 1: you would give the advice to say, take one second, 666 00:35:47,440 --> 00:35:49,160 Speaker 1: take a beat, and try to be able to play 667 00:35:49,280 --> 00:35:53,439 Speaker 1: the chess game, like you definitely have to take a beat. 668 00:35:53,440 --> 00:35:55,359 Speaker 1: I mean, I know for myself, it's like I can 669 00:35:55,360 --> 00:35:58,080 Speaker 1: go from being totally calm and I'll talk to you 670 00:35:58,120 --> 00:36:01,719 Speaker 1: for so long. But if it's you know, if it's 671 00:36:01,760 --> 00:36:04,120 Speaker 1: like oh that you know how some people like to 672 00:36:04,120 --> 00:36:06,879 Speaker 1: put their finger in your face, or you know, or 673 00:36:07,120 --> 00:36:09,759 Speaker 1: that thing that Monique was doing flipping her hair, oh, 674 00:36:09,840 --> 00:36:12,120 Speaker 1: I would have lost it on the first flip, like 675 00:36:12,239 --> 00:36:17,160 Speaker 1: do not It's taunting. It's taunting right right, And so 676 00:36:17,360 --> 00:36:20,560 Speaker 1: I mean I think some of it is understandable to 677 00:36:20,719 --> 00:36:24,440 Speaker 1: anybody of any race. It just depends on your background. 678 00:36:24,480 --> 00:36:27,440 Speaker 1: Some people their buttons aren't as easy to be pushed. 679 00:36:27,960 --> 00:36:32,000 Speaker 1: But you know, at the same time, if I act 680 00:36:32,080 --> 00:36:36,600 Speaker 1: out compared to you acting out, it's like I'm looking 681 00:36:36,640 --> 00:36:40,800 Speaker 1: at as the angry black woman. You just had a 682 00:36:40,880 --> 00:36:44,280 Speaker 1: bad day. That's why that's why I called you, because 683 00:36:44,760 --> 00:36:47,520 Speaker 1: I wanted to know if when you saw that clip, 684 00:36:47,680 --> 00:36:49,919 Speaker 1: if the first thought you had wasn't oh my god, 685 00:36:49,960 --> 00:36:52,239 Speaker 1: that's funked up. That fight between those two people or 686 00:36:52,280 --> 00:36:55,919 Speaker 1: if the first fight was like, that's not how we act, 687 00:36:55,960 --> 00:36:57,359 Speaker 1: Like you know what you're saying to your daughter. Look 688 00:36:57,360 --> 00:36:58,800 Speaker 1: if your daughter does something, and I'll look at my 689 00:36:58,840 --> 00:37:01,360 Speaker 1: daughter like, no, yesterday I said you gotta thank this person. 690 00:37:01,719 --> 00:37:03,799 Speaker 1: She said, oh, they know, I said, no, call them, 691 00:37:03,920 --> 00:37:05,480 Speaker 1: because you want to be known for the person who 692 00:37:05,480 --> 00:37:08,360 Speaker 1: thanks them. Like whatever it was, that's what I So 693 00:37:08,400 --> 00:37:10,880 Speaker 1: you're I'm the first thought I'm having with her is like, no, 694 00:37:11,560 --> 00:37:13,480 Speaker 1: that's not how it goes. So were you thinking when 695 00:37:13,480 --> 00:37:17,200 Speaker 1: that happened on TV? Like as you're thinking about how 696 00:37:17,239 --> 00:37:21,080 Speaker 1: she's representing black women not just two women fighting. Well, me, personally, 697 00:37:21,320 --> 00:37:24,160 Speaker 1: I don't fall into that because I mean, I definitely 698 00:37:24,160 --> 00:37:25,480 Speaker 1: have gotten to a point where I'm just like I 699 00:37:25,520 --> 00:37:27,200 Speaker 1: don't really care what people think. You know, you have 700 00:37:27,320 --> 00:37:30,600 Speaker 1: to be you at all times. But I do know 701 00:37:30,719 --> 00:37:35,000 Speaker 1: how overall, like my family, my mama, everybody is like, oh, 702 00:37:35,040 --> 00:37:37,080 Speaker 1: they're making us look bad. Oh you know what I mean? 703 00:37:37,440 --> 00:37:41,239 Speaker 1: So I know that thought process. You know, um gotta 704 00:37:41,280 --> 00:37:45,719 Speaker 1: it's it's historic realistically, because you know, for so long 705 00:37:45,880 --> 00:37:49,640 Speaker 1: it's like, you know, black people have wanted to become 706 00:37:49,680 --> 00:37:51,640 Speaker 1: more educated. That's why they say, now you know, black 707 00:37:51,680 --> 00:37:54,680 Speaker 1: women are like, you know, some of the percentage wise 708 00:37:54,719 --> 00:37:58,600 Speaker 1: one of the highest percentage of people graduating from college. 709 00:37:58,600 --> 00:38:00,880 Speaker 1: Because now it's like, we have to be educated, we 710 00:38:00,920 --> 00:38:03,520 Speaker 1: have to be this, you know, so that people can 711 00:38:03,520 --> 00:38:07,840 Speaker 1: stop looking at us like, oh, right on this level. Right. 712 00:38:08,239 --> 00:38:11,160 Speaker 1: But I noticed a long time ago, and I don't 713 00:38:11,160 --> 00:38:14,200 Speaker 1: know if you guys would agree, but I personally feel 714 00:38:14,239 --> 00:38:18,719 Speaker 1: like housewives, especially all the different um, all of the 715 00:38:18,800 --> 00:38:23,320 Speaker 1: different housewives, you know, we have kind of played into 716 00:38:23,440 --> 00:38:30,000 Speaker 1: the stereotypes of what people think about each region. Meaning um, 717 00:38:30,000 --> 00:38:33,239 Speaker 1: even though we don't necessarily try so. Meaning and I'm 718 00:38:33,280 --> 00:38:36,400 Speaker 1: not trying to say this in any type of racist 719 00:38:36,640 --> 00:38:41,160 Speaker 1: way or whatever. I'm just saying what people historically categorize 720 00:38:41,280 --> 00:38:44,839 Speaker 1: each type of person. Right, So, say, for instance, you know, 721 00:38:45,239 --> 00:38:49,600 Speaker 1: Jersey mostly Italian women. You know, they have had the 722 00:38:50,040 --> 00:38:53,080 Speaker 1: crazy blow ups with their family or the you know, 723 00:38:53,400 --> 00:38:56,120 Speaker 1: you know, and people have said historically, oh, Italians are 724 00:38:56,120 --> 00:38:59,080 Speaker 1: hot headed, la la la la. You know. So, even 725 00:38:59,080 --> 00:39:01,879 Speaker 1: though I'm sure they didn't try to play into the stereotype, 726 00:39:01,960 --> 00:39:04,480 Speaker 1: things like they have happened on their show, or you 727 00:39:04,520 --> 00:39:07,439 Speaker 1: think Housewives of O See, you think, oh, blonde hair, 728 00:39:07,719 --> 00:39:10,239 Speaker 1: this is that. Oh they don't you know, kind of 729 00:39:10,719 --> 00:39:15,799 Speaker 1: agree with yeah, you know, getting wasted, getting into girl 730 00:39:15,880 --> 00:39:18,920 Speaker 1: fights like blood. You know, yeah, that it's totally true. 731 00:39:18,960 --> 00:39:21,839 Speaker 1: It's totally true what you're saying. And yeah, and it's 732 00:39:21,880 --> 00:39:24,040 Speaker 1: between the producers and the cast that like New York 733 00:39:24,160 --> 00:39:27,719 Speaker 1: is trying to pretend they're elevated and intelligent in some way, 734 00:39:27,760 --> 00:39:29,919 Speaker 1: which they're not. More I've worked with them, and they're 735 00:39:29,960 --> 00:39:33,960 Speaker 1: not more intelligent than people in other casts Beverly Hills, Bethany, 736 00:39:34,040 --> 00:39:36,520 Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, not trying to pretend everybody is so 737 00:39:36,600 --> 00:39:38,640 Speaker 1: rich even though they're not. You're richer than many people 738 00:39:38,640 --> 00:39:42,480 Speaker 1: on Beverly Hills. That's that's a that's totally true, that 739 00:39:42,600 --> 00:39:45,919 Speaker 1: everyone's playing into the stereotypes. Yeah, and so I don't 740 00:39:45,960 --> 00:39:49,360 Speaker 1: think that we try to, but sometimes there is a 741 00:39:49,360 --> 00:39:52,960 Speaker 1: little bit of a stereotype within a certain group that 742 00:39:53,719 --> 00:39:56,759 Speaker 1: is naturally there. I mean, at the end of the day, 743 00:39:56,840 --> 00:39:59,320 Speaker 1: I am a black woman. I feel like I'm very intelligent. 744 00:39:59,440 --> 00:40:01,200 Speaker 1: I am a bi since woman, But do not come 745 00:40:01,280 --> 00:40:03,279 Speaker 1: up in my face. Then you're gonna be doing all 746 00:40:03,280 --> 00:40:05,799 Speaker 1: of this because yes, I will check you, you know 747 00:40:05,840 --> 00:40:09,520 Speaker 1: what I mean. And if that black woman, then that 748 00:40:09,520 --> 00:40:12,640 Speaker 1: would be me. I understand there's a lot, but there's 749 00:40:12,640 --> 00:40:14,800 Speaker 1: a line. Well, then I guess you're saying there's a line, 750 00:40:15,480 --> 00:40:17,840 Speaker 1: and that scene that we're talking about today seems to 751 00:40:17,880 --> 00:40:21,399 Speaker 1: me in any situation, any color of anyone's skin that 752 00:40:21,520 --> 00:40:24,960 Speaker 1: cross that line. Yeah, I mean I feel like, um, 753 00:40:25,080 --> 00:40:27,160 Speaker 1: I don't really like I said, you know, I didn't 754 00:40:27,200 --> 00:40:31,400 Speaker 1: really know what what sparked the argument between those two women, 755 00:40:31,800 --> 00:40:36,520 Speaker 1: but I know, but Potomac specifically, they carry themselves at 756 00:40:36,560 --> 00:40:42,520 Speaker 1: a higher standard for black women. But they definitely you know, 757 00:40:43,440 --> 00:40:46,520 Speaker 1: when they compare them to I guess the Housewives of Atlanta. 758 00:40:47,080 --> 00:40:50,879 Speaker 1: You know, um people Beverly Hills and OC. They're trying 759 00:40:50,880 --> 00:40:55,920 Speaker 1: to create that they're Beverly Hills and black. Potomac is 760 00:40:56,040 --> 00:40:58,799 Speaker 1: near d C. It's more of a political town. Yes, 761 00:40:58,880 --> 00:41:02,319 Speaker 1: the black women there are more, you know, Oh, we 762 00:41:02,400 --> 00:41:04,920 Speaker 1: have to look this way, but it's a political town 763 00:41:05,040 --> 00:41:07,280 Speaker 1: that they are surrounded about. You get what I'm saying. 764 00:41:07,400 --> 00:41:09,359 Speaker 1: I know, I told you your Atlanta is a town 765 00:41:09,360 --> 00:41:12,799 Speaker 1: from music. Yeah, we're towns were creative and yeah, and 766 00:41:12,840 --> 00:41:15,800 Speaker 1: that's more like stodgy and near GC. That makes perfect 767 00:41:15,800 --> 00:41:19,359 Speaker 1: sense too. It's good. So, um, I am shocked that 768 00:41:19,400 --> 00:41:21,839 Speaker 1: they did have a fight because they always trying to 769 00:41:21,880 --> 00:41:24,920 Speaker 1: say that there you know, well that's what I'm saying. 770 00:41:25,360 --> 00:41:29,160 Speaker 1: So I hadn't happened from Potomac y'all that I was like, 771 00:41:29,239 --> 00:41:32,359 Speaker 1: I expected this one thing and then I think that's 772 00:41:32,480 --> 00:41:34,600 Speaker 1: Bethany when we were talking earlier. That shocked me the most. 773 00:41:34,640 --> 00:41:37,840 Speaker 1: I was like, oh Potomac, Oh, okay, is that the 774 00:41:37,840 --> 00:41:44,920 Speaker 1: real person? Then a facade there that was broken? That's good? 775 00:41:45,080 --> 00:41:48,000 Speaker 1: Then that, Yeah, that's that's interesting. And somebody who watched it, 776 00:41:48,239 --> 00:41:51,640 Speaker 1: that's just somebody who watched most of the girls that 777 00:41:51,760 --> 00:41:54,520 Speaker 1: feel that way. I mean, like I said, it's like, 778 00:41:54,920 --> 00:41:58,239 Speaker 1: we can't allow and I think this is society. We 779 00:41:58,320 --> 00:42:02,360 Speaker 1: cannot allow what happens between the two women to represent 780 00:42:02,440 --> 00:42:07,200 Speaker 1: the whole group. And that's the problem. It's like everybody, 781 00:42:07,440 --> 00:42:10,879 Speaker 1: you see what happened between one, you know, set of people, 782 00:42:10,920 --> 00:42:12,680 Speaker 1: and then you judge the whole group. And that's the 783 00:42:12,680 --> 00:42:17,040 Speaker 1: whole problem that black people have with our representation on television. 784 00:42:17,080 --> 00:42:19,600 Speaker 1: You know, we want to see us, you know, in 785 00:42:19,680 --> 00:42:22,560 Speaker 1: a better light. Oh see more representative, you know, see 786 00:42:22,600 --> 00:42:26,520 Speaker 1: us represented better, Like oh, because they're in in whatever 787 00:42:26,600 --> 00:42:28,960 Speaker 1: race you're in, you're gonna have people that are rich 788 00:42:29,320 --> 00:42:31,600 Speaker 1: more educated. You're gonna have something that are broke, there's 789 00:42:31,680 --> 00:42:34,240 Speaker 1: not doing well. It don't matter what race you are. 790 00:42:34,320 --> 00:42:37,560 Speaker 1: But typically when it comes to black people, if you think, 791 00:42:37,920 --> 00:42:39,600 Speaker 1: you know, people think oh yeah, I need to get 792 00:42:39,640 --> 00:42:43,200 Speaker 1: with you know, the people that are really making moves 793 00:42:43,239 --> 00:42:47,440 Speaker 1: in this category or whatever tech or whatever it may be. 794 00:42:47,880 --> 00:42:49,400 Speaker 1: People won't be like, oh let me get with this 795 00:42:49,440 --> 00:42:52,000 Speaker 1: group over here. The black people like, they're not thinking 796 00:42:52,000 --> 00:42:54,319 Speaker 1: of us when it comes to those, you know, in 797 00:42:54,360 --> 00:42:56,760 Speaker 1: those rooms. Whereas we do have a lot of people 798 00:42:56,760 --> 00:43:00,160 Speaker 1: that are successful in the area. Um like Tani who 799 00:43:00,200 --> 00:43:03,080 Speaker 1: was on our show, her her husband, he's still making 800 00:43:03,160 --> 00:43:06,360 Speaker 1: major moves in tech. He's so you know, millions and 801 00:43:06,360 --> 00:43:09,520 Speaker 1: millions of dollars. And but when you think you're not 802 00:43:09,600 --> 00:43:12,840 Speaker 1: thinking of black people, you know what I'm saying. So 803 00:43:12,880 --> 00:43:15,600 Speaker 1: I just use them as an example to say, you know, 804 00:43:15,640 --> 00:43:18,880 Speaker 1: it doesn't matter you know what race you're and you're 805 00:43:18,880 --> 00:43:22,400 Speaker 1: gonna have somebody that's elevated in area every area of 806 00:43:22,440 --> 00:43:26,240 Speaker 1: every race. But typically people don't look at black people 807 00:43:26,360 --> 00:43:30,200 Speaker 1: as the ones who are top unless unless it has sports. 808 00:43:30,520 --> 00:43:35,280 Speaker 1: Unless it's sports, or unless it's music or entertainment or whatever, 809 00:43:35,600 --> 00:43:41,040 Speaker 1: then they think of us, right, but typically, you know, 810 00:43:41,320 --> 00:43:43,799 Speaker 1: they're not really looking our way. So that's why we 811 00:43:43,840 --> 00:43:46,920 Speaker 1: want to show them, you know, better representation of ourselves 812 00:43:46,920 --> 00:43:49,120 Speaker 1: when it comes to television because that's what people are watching. 813 00:43:49,360 --> 00:43:51,799 Speaker 1: And then it's crazy because like we gotta think not 814 00:43:51,960 --> 00:43:54,360 Speaker 1: just black people here, that's just here in the United States, 815 00:43:54,480 --> 00:43:57,719 Speaker 1: but overall as a society, as Americans. When people from 816 00:43:57,760 --> 00:44:00,760 Speaker 1: overseas look at us, they always think American are crazy 817 00:44:01,080 --> 00:44:03,399 Speaker 1: there there, they're that because they're just seeing what they 818 00:44:03,480 --> 00:44:08,279 Speaker 1: see on TV. Well, you're amazing. I really appreciate that perspective. 819 00:44:08,400 --> 00:44:11,480 Speaker 1: I am so happy that I called text and I 820 00:44:11,520 --> 00:44:14,200 Speaker 1: thank you very much. I'm glad that I called you 821 00:44:14,239 --> 00:44:16,200 Speaker 1: because we could not have had this conversation without you, 822 00:44:16,239 --> 00:44:18,920 Speaker 1: and I'm so grateful. I appreciate you. Candy, thank you. 823 00:44:18,960 --> 00:44:20,720 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I had a great time talking to you guys. 824 00:44:20,800 --> 00:44:23,799 Speaker 1: By awesome. I'm bye. I talked to you soon. Thank you. 825 00:44:34,040 --> 00:44:36,040 Speaker 1: You know what, I was just thinking what Candy said 826 00:44:36,080 --> 00:44:39,799 Speaker 1: bethany Um, I was thinking about Oklahoma, where I'm from, 827 00:44:39,840 --> 00:44:43,120 Speaker 1: where I'm writing they were to do at Housewives of Oklahoma. 828 00:44:43,440 --> 00:44:46,879 Speaker 1: When she was talking about, you know, the way people look, 829 00:44:46,960 --> 00:44:50,200 Speaker 1: I thought, what would Oklahoma be like? Okay, we'll be 830 00:44:50,280 --> 00:44:53,759 Speaker 1: talking to each other in a kind way. And I 831 00:44:53,800 --> 00:44:56,080 Speaker 1: love my Oklahoma women. I mean, I'm from there, That's what. 832 00:44:56,520 --> 00:44:59,080 Speaker 1: And then we kind of turned around. We'd have a 833 00:44:59,120 --> 00:45:01,399 Speaker 1: big problem with somebody. We turned around and talked about 834 00:45:01,400 --> 00:45:04,200 Speaker 1: it with somebody else, bless her heart, and we think 835 00:45:04,239 --> 00:45:06,800 Speaker 1: about it forever and forever, and we built the story. 836 00:45:06,840 --> 00:45:10,319 Speaker 1: We'd read write a story, and then that story is 837 00:45:10,360 --> 00:45:12,160 Speaker 1: the story of the show. And I just thought we 838 00:45:12,200 --> 00:45:14,439 Speaker 1: would nice each other to death. It would never work, 839 00:45:14,520 --> 00:45:17,600 Speaker 1: it would never work. Well, I thought it was interesting 840 00:45:17,640 --> 00:45:21,000 Speaker 1: because I walked into the show and they had this intelligent, polished, 841 00:45:21,719 --> 00:45:28,719 Speaker 1: you know, really seemingly orchestrated conversation about elevated conversation about 842 00:45:28,760 --> 00:45:30,440 Speaker 1: the other matter. And she was right. I didn't know 843 00:45:30,480 --> 00:45:33,400 Speaker 1: that they were perceived as more highbrow, and it just 844 00:45:33,440 --> 00:45:37,080 Speaker 1: took it just took a turn. So, okay, so we 845 00:45:37,160 --> 00:45:43,759 Speaker 1: did that. That's amazing. I mean, that's amazing. And I'm 846 00:45:43,840 --> 00:45:46,280 Speaker 1: are we are right, We're glad. I called her okay, great, 847 00:45:46,520 --> 00:45:48,279 Speaker 1: So it was great. I needed that perspective. I don't 848 00:45:48,320 --> 00:45:52,400 Speaker 1: have it. So um so now you have um the 849 00:45:52,719 --> 00:45:59,200 Speaker 1: therapy between Karen and her husband, which I thought was 850 00:46:00,160 --> 00:46:03,520 Speaker 1: so interesting that I liked that scene because they were honest, 851 00:46:03,640 --> 00:46:06,680 Speaker 1: and you get into therapy with a spouse or a partner, 852 00:46:06,760 --> 00:46:09,160 Speaker 1: or even without therapy, you just sometimes have to talk 853 00:46:09,200 --> 00:46:10,480 Speaker 1: to each other and say hi, like how do you 854 00:46:10,480 --> 00:46:12,759 Speaker 1: think this is going? Like why are you even with me? 855 00:46:12,880 --> 00:46:14,799 Speaker 1: Or what do you want? Or where are we in this? 856 00:46:15,520 --> 00:46:17,640 Speaker 1: And she said she was in love with him and 857 00:46:17,680 --> 00:46:21,120 Speaker 1: he said he honestly said he didn't know, but he wasn't. 858 00:46:21,200 --> 00:46:22,759 Speaker 1: And it wasn't like one of these things where I 859 00:46:22,760 --> 00:46:25,399 Speaker 1: felt uncomfortable because it was on camera in the way 860 00:46:25,440 --> 00:46:28,880 Speaker 1: that I did with the uh with with with the 861 00:46:28,920 --> 00:46:31,920 Speaker 1: man who cheated on his wife, like their pre nup 862 00:46:32,000 --> 00:46:34,920 Speaker 1: conversation was was awkward. This was just like honest. She 863 00:46:35,000 --> 00:46:37,480 Speaker 1: put him on TV with a therapist and he answered 864 00:46:37,520 --> 00:46:39,520 Speaker 1: honestly like he he didn't. He wasn't on a script. 865 00:46:39,560 --> 00:46:41,560 Speaker 1: I thought it was really real. I loved it too, 866 00:46:41,600 --> 00:46:44,040 Speaker 1: and that's why I love I actually loved that Karen. 867 00:46:44,160 --> 00:46:46,200 Speaker 1: I mean, she's a potster, but I like her. But 868 00:46:46,200 --> 00:46:48,760 Speaker 1: but I felt like, here's what I thought as a watcher. 869 00:46:49,320 --> 00:46:52,400 Speaker 1: I felt like this was authentic, that she did not 870 00:46:52,480 --> 00:46:56,160 Speaker 1: see that one coming. And also I thought about it myself, 871 00:46:56,200 --> 00:46:58,319 Speaker 1: how would I feel after many years of marriage and 872 00:46:58,360 --> 00:47:01,000 Speaker 1: having kids and we're in the ty light years? You know, 873 00:47:01,320 --> 00:47:03,000 Speaker 1: how would I feel if my husband if I said 874 00:47:03,040 --> 00:47:04,520 Speaker 1: I love and by the way, I'm in love with you, 875 00:47:04,600 --> 00:47:07,799 Speaker 1: so right? How or whoever? How would you feel if 876 00:47:07,800 --> 00:47:10,439 Speaker 1: the guy said, your husband, your mate of all these years, 877 00:47:10,440 --> 00:47:14,080 Speaker 1: said I love you, and you say, what are you 878 00:47:14,160 --> 00:47:16,680 Speaker 1: in love with me? And he said, I know I 879 00:47:16,719 --> 00:47:19,799 Speaker 1: love you? Am I in love with you after all 880 00:47:19,880 --> 00:47:23,640 Speaker 1: these years? I mean, you know, because the truth is beckany. 881 00:47:23,760 --> 00:47:28,799 Speaker 1: We know that relationships evolve and change. I always will 882 00:47:28,880 --> 00:47:32,000 Speaker 1: be in love with um, Josh. Are there going to 883 00:47:32,040 --> 00:47:34,799 Speaker 1: be times, I'm sure when he's like, I need five minutes, 884 00:47:34,840 --> 00:47:37,040 Speaker 1: I need a break from you for a second because 885 00:47:37,040 --> 00:47:40,440 Speaker 1: you're driving me crazy. It's just the truth. Relationships. I 886 00:47:40,480 --> 00:47:42,680 Speaker 1: don't and I don't. I think those are just words too. 887 00:47:42,760 --> 00:47:44,839 Speaker 1: I think in this moment when you asked him on 888 00:47:44,880 --> 00:47:48,040 Speaker 1: television in a scene when she's working and he's probably 889 00:47:48,080 --> 00:47:49,880 Speaker 1: bored and it's been twenty years, and I feel that 890 00:47:49,920 --> 00:47:52,200 Speaker 1: way sometimes after four years, we all feel I don't 891 00:47:52,239 --> 00:47:54,360 Speaker 1: think the language he knew the language, just like he 892 00:47:54,640 --> 00:47:56,520 Speaker 1: doesn't feel like he's in love with her in that moment, 893 00:47:56,560 --> 00:47:58,520 Speaker 1: because you could get your period and I feel like 894 00:47:58,520 --> 00:48:00,880 Speaker 1: you're in love with someone like you could be hormonal, Like, 895 00:48:01,560 --> 00:48:03,359 Speaker 1: what does it even mean? They're together all these years? 896 00:48:03,400 --> 00:48:06,239 Speaker 1: They were the same person there, partnership like you don't 897 00:48:06,320 --> 00:48:09,560 Speaker 1: know all the time where how you are changes every day? 898 00:48:09,360 --> 00:48:12,320 Speaker 1: Yes and yeah, like you said moments. One time I 899 00:48:12,360 --> 00:48:15,400 Speaker 1: asked my mom and she I said, Mom, what's the 900 00:48:15,440 --> 00:48:18,400 Speaker 1: key to your relationship with that? And just well I 901 00:48:18,440 --> 00:48:20,719 Speaker 1: love him that I can't bear him. And I thought, 902 00:48:21,680 --> 00:48:27,000 Speaker 1: hilarious answer. But I mean we've all been there exactly exactly. 903 00:48:27,600 --> 00:48:32,640 Speaker 1: So what about the the pre nup and post up conversation? 904 00:48:33,080 --> 00:48:36,480 Speaker 1: I thought that was a sweating I was sweating. I mean, 905 00:48:36,880 --> 00:48:39,200 Speaker 1: it didn't seem like he knew that was coming. She's 906 00:48:39,200 --> 00:48:42,240 Speaker 1: allowed to do whatever she wants based on what just happened. 907 00:48:42,239 --> 00:48:45,359 Speaker 1: Like it's almost like you know what I mean, Like 908 00:48:45,560 --> 00:48:48,160 Speaker 1: he doesn't really have a lot of leverage in the conversation, 909 00:48:48,239 --> 00:48:51,080 Speaker 1: But is there dynamic? This guy's got money? Is there? Like? 910 00:48:51,200 --> 00:48:54,880 Speaker 1: Is that why this pre conversation's happening? That's what it's about. 911 00:48:55,160 --> 00:48:57,640 Speaker 1: So this guy is because because she's very attractive and 912 00:48:57,640 --> 00:49:03,120 Speaker 1: she seems really sweet, and he seems not that interesting 913 00:49:03,160 --> 00:49:04,839 Speaker 1: to me. I'm not I'm not getting what's going on. 914 00:49:05,239 --> 00:49:07,840 Speaker 1: I'm I'm not and I have it from the beginning. 915 00:49:07,880 --> 00:49:10,560 Speaker 1: But for whatever reason she did and there I think 916 00:49:10,560 --> 00:49:12,640 Speaker 1: there must be a lot of things off camera that 917 00:49:12,680 --> 00:49:15,960 Speaker 1: I don't seek because I question it. But one thing 918 00:49:16,000 --> 00:49:18,560 Speaker 1: that bothered me about that scene that well, one thing 919 00:49:18,560 --> 00:49:22,239 Speaker 1: that made me sad um is I felt like, God, 920 00:49:22,400 --> 00:49:24,720 Speaker 1: is this the first time she's been able to feel 921 00:49:24,760 --> 00:49:28,279 Speaker 1: safe or oh, connection enough to be able to tell 922 00:49:28,360 --> 00:49:31,480 Speaker 1: him in front of a therapist because he the reason 923 00:49:31,520 --> 00:49:33,200 Speaker 1: I asked that or say that is because he did 924 00:49:33,200 --> 00:49:35,640 Speaker 1: seem oh, wait, you're talking about Karen now, No, I'm 925 00:49:35,640 --> 00:49:39,040 Speaker 1: talking about um. Oh sorry, okay, God, oh, because she 926 00:49:39,080 --> 00:49:41,200 Speaker 1: said we should go talk to is that mixing? And 927 00:49:41,239 --> 00:49:43,640 Speaker 1: I'm like, didn't they about it before? Because he did 928 00:49:43,680 --> 00:49:48,280 Speaker 1: seem very generally generally surprised when she asked the question 929 00:49:48,280 --> 00:49:50,000 Speaker 1: in front of the therapist, and I felt bad that 930 00:49:50,040 --> 00:49:52,719 Speaker 1: she that they didn't have that conversation at home. I 931 00:49:52,760 --> 00:49:55,640 Speaker 1: just felt like it seems like a surprise all the 932 00:49:55,680 --> 00:49:58,359 Speaker 1: way around. And I hated it, not for him, just 933 00:49:58,560 --> 00:50:02,200 Speaker 1: I thought I hated it for her. She couldn't she 934 00:50:02,440 --> 00:50:07,080 Speaker 1: felt comfortable talking about it and with him alone. Does 935 00:50:07,120 --> 00:50:09,200 Speaker 1: that make sense unless the producers have said, you have 936 00:50:09,239 --> 00:50:11,239 Speaker 1: to talk about this. I've had really awkward conversations on 937 00:50:11,280 --> 00:50:12,759 Speaker 1: camera that I really didn't want to have, and the 938 00:50:12,760 --> 00:50:15,480 Speaker 1: other person doesn't either. I just never understand the man 939 00:50:15,640 --> 00:50:17,719 Speaker 1: signing up for this. I haven't. I don't know how 940 00:50:17,800 --> 00:50:19,640 Speaker 1: much he's been involved in the show. But there's no 941 00:50:19,760 --> 00:50:22,920 Speaker 1: upside to a successful wealthy man being on this show. 942 00:50:22,960 --> 00:50:25,600 Speaker 1: There's no upside to a successful wealthy person being on 943 00:50:25,640 --> 00:50:28,399 Speaker 1: the show. It is all downhill, like it is all 944 00:50:28,440 --> 00:50:32,160 Speaker 1: exposure and putting yourself at risk and anything can happen 945 00:50:32,280 --> 00:50:35,239 Speaker 1: like so I don't understand, except for the fact that 946 00:50:35,280 --> 00:50:38,240 Speaker 1: if this guy loves If, he loves If, he loves 947 00:50:38,239 --> 00:50:44,000 Speaker 1: her and wants to stay with her, and he's screwed 948 00:50:44,040 --> 00:50:46,680 Speaker 1: around and gotten caught that this is the Maya cult, 949 00:50:46,719 --> 00:50:48,440 Speaker 1: but that she's going to say to him on camera, 950 00:50:48,440 --> 00:50:50,560 Speaker 1: are you giving me a post and up? Then I 951 00:50:50,640 --> 00:50:53,640 Speaker 1: logically understand that. But short of that, I don't understand. 952 00:50:53,960 --> 00:50:57,560 Speaker 1: My fiance would never have any conversation on television. I 953 00:50:57,600 --> 00:50:59,080 Speaker 1: couldn't say to him, what did you be for lunch? 954 00:50:59,080 --> 00:51:00,799 Speaker 1: He wouldn't. He would He would not be on TV 955 00:51:00,880 --> 00:51:02,840 Speaker 1: for that you know. I can't imagine you said to 956 00:51:02,840 --> 00:51:04,480 Speaker 1: me the other I please don't ever let us be 957 00:51:04,520 --> 00:51:08,560 Speaker 1: on a reality I say, gosh, no, I'm not. That 958 00:51:08,800 --> 00:51:11,279 Speaker 1: wouldn't wouldn't wave to me. He wouldn't stand in a 959 00:51:11,280 --> 00:51:12,920 Speaker 1: corner and support me in an event like you just 960 00:51:13,040 --> 00:51:16,799 Speaker 1: you just wouldn't much less have me say to him, 961 00:51:16,800 --> 00:51:18,920 Speaker 1: should we do a post up? He wouldn't do it 962 00:51:18,960 --> 00:51:21,160 Speaker 1: for fifty million dollars. There's no there's no upside to this. 963 00:51:21,200 --> 00:51:24,120 Speaker 1: So I don't understand these scenes and what's going on 964 00:51:24,400 --> 00:51:27,240 Speaker 1: unless it's just because he owes her one. I think 965 00:51:27,320 --> 00:51:29,480 Speaker 1: that when they met, this is a very short take 966 00:51:29,520 --> 00:51:31,960 Speaker 1: on it. When they met, they were having fun. He 967 00:51:32,080 --> 00:51:35,120 Speaker 1: fell he fell in love with this fun, easy, breezy 968 00:51:35,320 --> 00:51:38,040 Speaker 1: she'll kind of go along with whatever. And then what 969 00:51:38,160 --> 00:51:41,799 Speaker 1: happens every time people get married for whatever reason, it 970 00:51:41,880 --> 00:51:45,000 Speaker 1: gets serious, like life comes in. Like you said, reality 971 00:51:45,080 --> 00:51:47,200 Speaker 1: sets in and you have to figure out, oh, it's 972 00:51:47,200 --> 00:51:49,160 Speaker 1: not just this weekend we're gonna be together. We have 973 00:51:49,239 --> 00:51:50,680 Speaker 1: to set that aside and we have to wait for 974 00:51:50,680 --> 00:51:54,320 Speaker 1: the next time. And that life happened, and he was like, whoa, whoa. 975 00:51:54,440 --> 00:51:57,040 Speaker 1: This is where I gather from watching it. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Wait, 976 00:51:57,080 --> 00:52:00,000 Speaker 1: I thought we had this, and now it's involving involved. 977 00:52:00,480 --> 00:52:02,680 Speaker 1: Plus we saw him stress out of her a restaurant 978 00:52:02,680 --> 00:52:05,120 Speaker 1: that looked really bad to me on television that he owned, 979 00:52:05,440 --> 00:52:07,279 Speaker 1: and then we saw that, and then he was really 980 00:52:07,400 --> 00:52:08,799 Speaker 1: rude to her, and I just kept thinking, get up, 981 00:52:08,840 --> 00:52:11,400 Speaker 1: get up. He just seemed not fun. He didn't have 982 00:52:11,480 --> 00:52:14,560 Speaker 1: fun with her anymore, That's what it seems. And also 983 00:52:14,680 --> 00:52:18,040 Speaker 1: sometimes marriages like the idea of the action and the 984 00:52:18,080 --> 00:52:20,040 Speaker 1: fame and the light of the show, and they think 985 00:52:20,080 --> 00:52:21,960 Speaker 1: together it's gonna be a fun adventure. Might say their 986 00:52:21,960 --> 00:52:24,319 Speaker 1: marriage has happened all the time, and it is not 987 00:52:24,520 --> 00:52:28,240 Speaker 1: a good idea for relationships. So last and last question 988 00:52:28,280 --> 00:52:36,600 Speaker 1: speaking of relationships is um Jamal and Giselle and and that, 989 00:52:36,760 --> 00:52:39,080 Speaker 1: And this is where I don't know if I'm judging. 990 00:52:39,120 --> 00:52:41,520 Speaker 1: I'm not judging him. He has eight or nine baby mamas, 991 00:52:41,560 --> 00:52:44,439 Speaker 1: But like I cannot imagine, this is where the line 992 00:52:44,440 --> 00:52:47,760 Speaker 1: of judgment is where for me, I cannot imagine wanting 993 00:52:47,760 --> 00:52:51,040 Speaker 1: to be in a relationship with someone who had eight 994 00:52:51,120 --> 00:52:53,120 Speaker 1: or nine children from eight or nine other people. And 995 00:52:53,160 --> 00:52:55,040 Speaker 1: I thought she was such a class act for saying 996 00:52:55,080 --> 00:52:57,759 Speaker 1: I won't comment out of respect for their mothers. But 997 00:52:57,800 --> 00:52:59,520 Speaker 1: I also think she doesn't want to be judged on 998 00:52:59,560 --> 00:53:03,360 Speaker 1: that too. What the hell I don't I don't understand. 999 00:53:03,719 --> 00:53:06,399 Speaker 1: I've spent a wee bit of time with her, and 1000 00:53:06,440 --> 00:53:10,920 Speaker 1: I know I am gathering this is my opinion, Bethany. 1001 00:53:11,000 --> 00:53:13,600 Speaker 1: Of course I am gathering that that deeply hurt her 1002 00:53:15,160 --> 00:53:16,880 Speaker 1: because I think there was a time where she was 1003 00:53:17,000 --> 00:53:20,160 Speaker 1: considering it like that's her family, and that was her 1004 00:53:20,280 --> 00:53:22,680 Speaker 1: first She's got these two girls, and then when all 1005 00:53:22,680 --> 00:53:25,799 Speaker 1: this start happened, you can only forgive so much. And 1006 00:53:25,840 --> 00:53:28,240 Speaker 1: she's also being a woman of faith, him being a minister, 1007 00:53:28,440 --> 00:53:31,000 Speaker 1: and maybe this is where I have to say, Okay, Lord, 1008 00:53:31,000 --> 00:53:33,640 Speaker 1: help me not judge, because I do tend to look 1009 00:53:33,640 --> 00:53:36,040 Speaker 1: at him and go, how are you leading a congregation? 1010 00:53:36,560 --> 00:53:38,560 Speaker 1: I would say this to any minister of any faith, 1011 00:53:38,560 --> 00:53:42,120 Speaker 1: how are you? And then continuing to do that. Well, 1012 00:53:42,560 --> 00:53:45,120 Speaker 1: it's funny because Candy feels that when she sees women 1013 00:53:45,560 --> 00:53:47,600 Speaker 1: arguing like that, or her family feels that that's a 1014 00:53:47,640 --> 00:53:51,160 Speaker 1: bad representation for black women. And you must cringe when 1015 00:53:51,160 --> 00:53:53,920 Speaker 1: something happens with a priest or a minister. So it's 1016 00:53:53,920 --> 00:53:57,480 Speaker 1: a religious figurehead and you're sitting there talking about religion 1017 00:53:57,480 --> 00:54:00,640 Speaker 1: and faith and people are saying, oh, and as that 1018 00:54:00,760 --> 00:54:03,160 Speaker 1: as you are met another thing that they're teeth baste about, 1019 00:54:03,200 --> 00:54:05,279 Speaker 1: and it bothers bothers to crap on me. Thank you 1020 00:54:05,320 --> 00:54:09,399 Speaker 1: for bringing that up. It really bothers me. I'm like, dude, yeah, 1021 00:54:09,480 --> 00:54:13,359 Speaker 1: represent represent and you're not doing and you're showing your 1022 00:54:13,400 --> 00:54:17,760 Speaker 1: daughters how to treat a woman. It makes me makes 1023 00:54:17,760 --> 00:54:19,600 Speaker 1: me mad. And to be in the frison and you're 1024 00:54:19,600 --> 00:54:24,799 Speaker 1: doing that. Yes, so interesting. We had race and religion 1025 00:54:24,920 --> 00:54:29,239 Speaker 1: come up in this episode based on representation. You don't 1026 00:54:29,280 --> 00:54:31,880 Speaker 1: you make a choice to be a religious figurehead. You 1027 00:54:31,960 --> 00:54:33,560 Speaker 1: got to think about what you're doing and where you're 1028 00:54:33,560 --> 00:54:36,799 Speaker 1: putting it. You just said the keywords, Bethany, you make 1029 00:54:36,840 --> 00:54:40,080 Speaker 1: a choice. If he just chose not to live in 1030 00:54:40,080 --> 00:54:43,439 Speaker 1: the limelight or put himself on because he seems full, 1031 00:54:43,719 --> 00:54:47,439 Speaker 1: willing and able to do it. She's right. When I've seen, 1032 00:54:47,600 --> 00:54:50,840 Speaker 1: you know, when white women fight, there's below the belts, 1033 00:54:50,880 --> 00:54:53,359 Speaker 1: there's all these things, the glasses drown. But we're just 1034 00:54:53,600 --> 00:54:56,879 Speaker 1: having a temper tantrum. And also we don't say it's 1035 00:54:56,920 --> 00:54:59,719 Speaker 1: a bad example of white women because we just right 1036 00:54:59,760 --> 00:55:03,399 Speaker 1: about that. Yeah, you're right. He nailed it on that. Yeah, 1037 00:55:03,640 --> 00:55:06,120 Speaker 1: you nailed it. I so appreciate you for coming on. 1038 00:55:06,480 --> 00:55:09,080 Speaker 1: I hope you see it's not about it's not really 1039 00:55:09,080 --> 00:55:11,319 Speaker 1: about the show. It's about what I love it. I 1040 00:55:11,320 --> 00:55:13,120 Speaker 1: actually love it because it's in depth and it brings 1041 00:55:13,200 --> 00:55:15,759 Speaker 1: up a lot of topical conversations that we should be 1042 00:55:15,760 --> 00:55:18,799 Speaker 1: having and especially today, and I really appreciate it. I 1043 00:55:18,840 --> 00:55:21,960 Speaker 1: appreciate it too. You're awesome, as I knew you would be. 1044 00:55:22,040 --> 00:55:25,400 Speaker 1: But yeah, so proud. Yeah, I'm so excited this episode. 1045 00:55:25,400 --> 00:55:26,719 Speaker 1: I can't wait to talk to my producers when you 1046 00:55:26,719 --> 00:55:28,640 Speaker 1: get off enough to tell each other how wonderful everything. 1047 00:55:29,080 --> 00:55:32,200 Speaker 1: Thank you. I love everything that you're doing in this life. Congratulation, 1048 00:55:32,200 --> 00:55:34,680 Speaker 1: thank you. Likewise, thank you by Hi