1 00:00:00,440 --> 00:00:02,160 Speaker 1: She was at the top of the seesaw and I 2 00:00:02,160 --> 00:00:05,440 Speaker 1: guess whoever was on the bottom got off. She came down. 3 00:00:05,480 --> 00:00:07,640 Speaker 1: She hit her head, but she went through the day. 4 00:00:07,680 --> 00:00:11,040 Speaker 1: She was okay. But later that afternoon she had a 5 00:00:11,119 --> 00:00:17,159 Speaker 1: seizure and I noticed immediately that the right side of 6 00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:20,159 Speaker 1: her face was drooping and she was talking out of 7 00:00:20,160 --> 00:00:24,360 Speaker 1: the left side. That's Brian and Kathy Usher. They're talking 8 00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:30,680 Speaker 1: about their daughter, Beth. She had a very rare neurological encephalitis. 9 00:00:30,760 --> 00:00:34,879 Speaker 1: Every minute or so she would have like either these jerks. 10 00:00:35,360 --> 00:00:38,680 Speaker 1: They'd throw her to the ground, off a chair, a 11 00:00:38,800 --> 00:00:42,000 Speaker 1: fork would go flying, whatever was in her hand. It was, 12 00:00:43,240 --> 00:00:50,120 Speaker 1: you know, not a good time. The day we left 13 00:00:50,240 --> 00:00:56,400 Speaker 1: Johns Hopkins, their last words to us, um it was 14 00:00:56,680 --> 00:01:01,920 Speaker 1: go home and enjoy life and let's hope she has 15 00:01:02,120 --> 00:01:08,200 Speaker 1: ten good years. And then that was in seven and 16 00:01:08,280 --> 00:01:14,200 Speaker 1: Beth just turned forty. Thanks Mar and Gathy. Just more 17 00:01:15,560 --> 00:01:23,640 Speaker 1: keep that off the podcast. I'm Carla Wallace and this 18 00:01:23,760 --> 00:01:27,280 Speaker 1: is Finding Fred, a podcast about Fred Rogers from I 19 00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:33,280 Speaker 1: Heart Media and Fatherly in partnership with Transmitter Media. Today. 20 00:01:33,560 --> 00:01:37,040 Speaker 1: Just one story I really wish I could remember. I 21 00:01:37,160 --> 00:01:40,399 Speaker 1: was so young at the time about Fred Rogers and 22 00:01:40,480 --> 00:01:44,679 Speaker 1: a kid named Beth. I only remember through stories that 23 00:01:45,360 --> 00:01:50,440 Speaker 1: Mom and Dad told me. It's slowly built up to 24 00:01:50,480 --> 00:01:53,720 Speaker 1: where she was having over a hundred seizures a day, 25 00:01:54,120 --> 00:01:57,520 Speaker 1: some so severe they would knock her down and she 26 00:01:57,560 --> 00:02:02,160 Speaker 1: would be flailing, and we were worried she couldn't breathe. 27 00:02:02,880 --> 00:02:06,680 Speaker 1: And I would go into grocery stores or church or whatever, 28 00:02:07,400 --> 00:02:10,840 Speaker 1: and people would look at me and look at her 29 00:02:10,880 --> 00:02:13,399 Speaker 1: because she was black and blue from head to toe 30 00:02:13,639 --> 00:02:21,200 Speaker 1: from falling. We were watching this deterioration happened, and every 31 00:02:21,240 --> 00:02:24,840 Speaker 1: time we went to the doctor, they had no idea 32 00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:28,520 Speaker 1: what was going on. It was so crazy that we 33 00:02:28,639 --> 00:02:32,359 Speaker 1: even tore apart of bedroom, thinking maybe she was bit 34 00:02:32,480 --> 00:02:35,919 Speaker 1: by a spider. Maybe there was a spider in the room. 35 00:02:36,120 --> 00:02:39,840 Speaker 1: You know. We were constantly calling all over the place 36 00:02:39,919 --> 00:02:44,160 Speaker 1: to try to learn of new drugs, new studies being done. 37 00:02:44,440 --> 00:02:49,600 Speaker 1: Didn't you doctor was checking and go into the library. 38 00:02:49,120 --> 00:02:54,880 Speaker 1: I even borrowed a doctor's lab coat and broke into 39 00:02:54,960 --> 00:03:00,720 Speaker 1: Yale University's medical library because they weren't allowed owing anybody 40 00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:05,560 Speaker 1: in there. We felt like we were on Twilight Zone 41 00:03:05,720 --> 00:03:10,760 Speaker 1: because here something is obviously eating away at our child's brain. 42 00:03:11,440 --> 00:03:14,760 Speaker 1: We're watching it happen, you think like you have an 43 00:03:14,760 --> 00:03:18,639 Speaker 1: ill child and the world should come together and make 44 00:03:18,720 --> 00:03:22,799 Speaker 1: this child better. But no one had any idea what 45 00:03:22,880 --> 00:03:28,520 Speaker 1: was going on. We tried just about everything and um 46 00:03:28,560 --> 00:03:31,640 Speaker 1: in order for us to get ready for work in 47 00:03:31,680 --> 00:03:36,000 Speaker 1: the morning, we had to PLoP Beth up with a 48 00:03:36,040 --> 00:03:40,520 Speaker 1: bunch of pillows in front of the television set, and 49 00:03:40,600 --> 00:03:44,240 Speaker 1: we instructed her older brother, he's Brian, he's older by 50 00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:47,320 Speaker 1: two and a half years, to sit with her with 51 00:03:47,400 --> 00:03:50,360 Speaker 1: his arms around her, and they were surrounded by pillows 52 00:03:50,760 --> 00:03:55,120 Speaker 1: watching Mr Rogers neighborhood and he called, he said, mom, 53 00:03:55,320 --> 00:04:00,400 Speaker 1: and I came running immediately, and he said Mr. Wadgers 54 00:04:00,720 --> 00:04:05,040 Speaker 1: is over with and Beth didn't have a seizure. And 55 00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:08,880 Speaker 1: then the next day the same thing happened, and the 56 00:04:08,960 --> 00:04:13,200 Speaker 1: next day after that, I said, this is very peculiar. 57 00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:17,840 Speaker 1: So then I sat down with her and I just 58 00:04:17,960 --> 00:04:20,960 Speaker 1: looked at her, and her eyes were just she was 59 00:04:21,080 --> 00:04:25,640 Speaker 1: inside that television screen, and it was like that he 60 00:04:25,800 --> 00:04:29,800 Speaker 1: was talking directly to her, even so that when he 61 00:04:29,839 --> 00:04:34,280 Speaker 1: would ask a question like shall we feed the fish today, 62 00:04:34,480 --> 00:04:37,920 Speaker 1: Beth would say, yes, we should. And at the end 63 00:04:37,960 --> 00:04:42,640 Speaker 1: of every episode he would say, I love you, just 64 00:04:42,760 --> 00:04:46,080 Speaker 1: the way you are, and Beth would say, I love 65 00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:52,160 Speaker 1: you too, Mr Rogers, and she would not have one seizure. 66 00:04:55,520 --> 00:04:59,440 Speaker 1: After two and a half years of research, constant seizures, 67 00:04:59,440 --> 00:05:02,800 Speaker 1: and makes of treatments, Beth and her parents finally got 68 00:05:02,800 --> 00:05:08,160 Speaker 1: a diagnosis rest Mussan's encephalitis. It's an extremely rare and 69 00:05:08,200 --> 00:05:13,320 Speaker 1: progressive disease that attacks the brain. The only treatment is 70 00:05:13,480 --> 00:05:17,680 Speaker 1: at that time, was to remove the entire left side 71 00:05:17,680 --> 00:05:22,120 Speaker 1: of her brain. You just can't fathom that type of surgery. 72 00:05:22,320 --> 00:05:26,320 Speaker 1: And I couldn't imagine doing that left there. So now 73 00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:30,480 Speaker 1: we're not doing that. We even consulted a neurosurgeon at 74 00:05:30,640 --> 00:05:34,440 Speaker 1: Yale who said that they would not even put a 75 00:05:34,600 --> 00:05:40,160 Speaker 1: dog through that. And then Bethy kept getting worse, and 76 00:05:40,440 --> 00:05:43,640 Speaker 1: I mean impacted her whole life, I mean her learning 77 00:05:43,800 --> 00:05:47,880 Speaker 1: her friendships. It was. It was a nightmare. We were 78 00:05:47,920 --> 00:05:51,440 Speaker 1: all petrified. We didn't go anywhere. We shut down as 79 00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:55,919 Speaker 1: a family. Um, we were afraid to leave her anywhere. 80 00:05:56,000 --> 00:05:58,880 Speaker 1: We didn't. One of us was with her all the 81 00:05:58,960 --> 00:06:03,200 Speaker 1: time around the cloth. Yeah. Finally, I think what pushed 82 00:06:03,240 --> 00:06:06,279 Speaker 1: us over the edge. It was a holiday show and 83 00:06:06,400 --> 00:06:10,640 Speaker 1: BETHI had prepared for it and singing a song with 84 00:06:10,680 --> 00:06:13,320 Speaker 1: her classmates. I think you were in what first grade 85 00:06:13,360 --> 00:06:19,560 Speaker 1: at the time, and it was bomb remember that. And 86 00:06:19,800 --> 00:06:24,719 Speaker 1: so the night of the show, we were there and 87 00:06:24,760 --> 00:06:29,680 Speaker 1: she has a seizure right in the middle. Bow had 88 00:06:29,720 --> 00:06:33,160 Speaker 1: to help her fixed seizure, and she looked at us 89 00:06:33,240 --> 00:06:38,920 Speaker 1: and said, I ruined the whole thing. And she said, 90 00:06:38,960 --> 00:06:46,200 Speaker 1: these seizures, I just want them to go away. So 91 00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:48,640 Speaker 1: they decided to go ahead with the brain surgery known 92 00:06:48,640 --> 00:06:51,719 Speaker 1: as a hemisphere ectomy, and they scheduled it for the 93 00:06:51,760 --> 00:06:55,800 Speaker 1: following February. That gave them two months at home with 94 00:06:55,839 --> 00:07:01,440 Speaker 1: Beth before the surgery. We knew that there was a 95 00:07:01,480 --> 00:07:07,719 Speaker 1: possibility that Beth could fall into a coma, she could 96 00:07:07,760 --> 00:07:11,800 Speaker 1: be paralyzed for life, and she could even die from 97 00:07:11,920 --> 00:07:17,240 Speaker 1: this surgery. We wanted to make the time before her 98 00:07:17,280 --> 00:07:22,720 Speaker 1: surgery spectacular. So Cathy found the number for Fred Rogers 99 00:07:22,760 --> 00:07:26,520 Speaker 1: TV station and explained to his assistant that her daughter 100 00:07:26,600 --> 00:07:30,520 Speaker 1: was going in for a horrendous surgery. Kathy asked for 101 00:07:30,560 --> 00:07:33,800 Speaker 1: an autograph photo of Mr Rogers to tape up in 102 00:07:33,840 --> 00:07:38,600 Speaker 1: the hospital room, and she said, I will, you know, 103 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:43,239 Speaker 1: talk to Fred and get back to you. And maybe 104 00:07:43,280 --> 00:07:46,320 Speaker 1: an hour later I got a call and she said, 105 00:07:47,000 --> 00:07:51,440 Speaker 1: Fred is going to call Beth at seven o'clock this evening. 106 00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:55,040 Speaker 1: Is that good for you? And I said he's going 107 00:07:55,080 --> 00:07:58,720 Speaker 1: to call her. The phone rang and I picked it 108 00:07:58,840 --> 00:08:03,440 Speaker 1: up and I said to Beth, Beth, a friend is 109 00:08:03,520 --> 00:08:08,360 Speaker 1: calling for you. And at this point Beth had no friends, 110 00:08:09,120 --> 00:08:12,200 Speaker 1: so thinking that a friend was on the line was 111 00:08:12,280 --> 00:08:16,560 Speaker 1: really unbelievable. And she ran over and I gave her 112 00:08:16,560 --> 00:08:25,080 Speaker 1: the phone and she's skilled, it's squilled Mr Rogers. Bummy, dad, 113 00:08:25,240 --> 00:08:30,560 Speaker 1: it's Mr Rogers. Brian and I left the room. We 114 00:08:30,560 --> 00:08:34,920 Speaker 1: were peeking over around the corner because she we wanted 115 00:08:34,920 --> 00:08:39,080 Speaker 1: her to have this real, genuine conversation with him. Was 116 00:08:39,280 --> 00:08:43,400 Speaker 1: over an hour. She was talking to each and every 117 00:08:43,720 --> 00:08:48,199 Speaker 1: character on Mr Rogers and Neighborhood, and all of a 118 00:08:48,240 --> 00:08:52,720 Speaker 1: sudden we heard her say, I'm afraid I'm going to 119 00:08:52,800 --> 00:08:59,600 Speaker 1: die and leave my brother and my parents. And then 120 00:08:59,679 --> 00:09:05,920 Speaker 1: we heard her say really, Mr Rogers, really, King Friday, 121 00:09:06,040 --> 00:09:11,160 Speaker 1: and she hung up the phone saying I love you too, 122 00:09:11,320 --> 00:09:16,520 Speaker 1: Mr Rogers, thank you so much. I love you King Friday. 123 00:09:16,600 --> 00:09:20,400 Speaker 1: I love you Elaine Lady Elaine fear Child, and I 124 00:09:20,480 --> 00:09:24,920 Speaker 1: love you Daniel Strike Tiger, thank you for calling me. 125 00:09:25,520 --> 00:09:29,960 Speaker 1: And I am going to be okay, and she hung 126 00:09:30,080 --> 00:09:33,960 Speaker 1: up the phone and we were in a puddle. We 127 00:09:34,120 --> 00:09:43,720 Speaker 1: just couldn't believe it. That February, the family made the 128 00:09:43,720 --> 00:09:48,439 Speaker 1: trip to Johns Hopkins for the surgery. The operation was long, 129 00:09:48,520 --> 00:09:52,440 Speaker 1: about twelve hours, and at first things for Beth looked good. 130 00:09:53,960 --> 00:09:58,680 Speaker 1: The surgery went well, and then later that night she 131 00:09:58,960 --> 00:10:03,920 Speaker 1: fell into a deep coma. We were killing ourselves, like, 132 00:10:04,120 --> 00:10:06,880 Speaker 1: what did we do? You know, at that point we 133 00:10:06,920 --> 00:10:10,760 Speaker 1: thought for sure we made the wrong decision. We were begging, 134 00:10:11,200 --> 00:10:15,560 Speaker 1: praying to God, please just let her wake up from this. 135 00:10:16,200 --> 00:10:19,000 Speaker 1: If she can't walk or talk, we don't care, just 136 00:10:19,200 --> 00:10:21,520 Speaker 1: let her come out of it. And we did not 137 00:10:21,720 --> 00:10:25,080 Speaker 1: leave her side. We were in the intensive care the 138 00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:29,400 Speaker 1: entire time. Brian and Cathy said at Beth's bedside night 139 00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:33,960 Speaker 1: after night for weeks, and one source of constant comfort 140 00:10:34,440 --> 00:10:40,199 Speaker 1: was the music of Mr Rogers. Before her surgery, after 141 00:10:40,320 --> 00:10:43,559 Speaker 1: he spoke to her on the phone, he sent her 142 00:10:44,200 --> 00:10:49,800 Speaker 1: a huge box of tapes, cassette tapes, and we had 143 00:10:49,840 --> 00:10:55,720 Speaker 1: this little tiny Fisher Price battery operated tape player, and 144 00:10:56,679 --> 00:11:01,960 Speaker 1: all around the clock we would play songs. It's a 145 00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:05,280 Speaker 1: beautiful day in the neighborhood. You can go down, You'll 146 00:11:05,280 --> 00:11:09,040 Speaker 1: never go down the drain, and we would play them 147 00:11:09,200 --> 00:11:12,839 Speaker 1: over and over when she was in a coma. One 148 00:11:12,880 --> 00:11:18,800 Speaker 1: of my vivid memories is going into the intensive care 149 00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:24,319 Speaker 1: unit and she was strapped up to every thing imaginable, 150 00:11:24,360 --> 00:11:27,800 Speaker 1: all kinds of I v s and her head was 151 00:11:28,240 --> 00:11:33,400 Speaker 1: swollen like three times the size. Her eyes were swollen shut, 152 00:11:34,400 --> 00:11:37,040 Speaker 1: and you could hear the beep beep beep of the 153 00:11:37,080 --> 00:11:40,800 Speaker 1: heart monitor and the dripping of all the i vs. 154 00:11:41,480 --> 00:11:46,360 Speaker 1: And in the background you hear there are many ways 155 00:11:46,480 --> 00:11:50,960 Speaker 1: to say I love you, Mr Rogers in the backgrounds. 156 00:11:51,520 --> 00:12:00,600 Speaker 1: That was constantly going on in the room. Anyways, anyways, 157 00:12:02,840 --> 00:12:05,680 Speaker 1: more from the Ushers in just a minute, love you. 158 00:12:30,160 --> 00:12:33,640 Speaker 1: After her brain surgery, Beth Usher fell into a deep coma. 159 00:12:34,760 --> 00:12:38,560 Speaker 1: Her parents, Kathy and Brian, kept Mr Rogers music playing 160 00:12:38,600 --> 00:12:43,160 Speaker 1: in her room. One night, a nurse came into Beth's 161 00:12:43,240 --> 00:12:49,240 Speaker 1: room and said, Cathy, there's a man with a voice 162 00:12:49,280 --> 00:12:54,400 Speaker 1: sounding like Mr Rogers, claiming he is Fred Rogers and 163 00:12:54,480 --> 00:12:57,480 Speaker 1: he'd like to speak with you. And I went to 164 00:12:57,520 --> 00:12:59,920 Speaker 1: the desk and I picked it up and he said, Cathy, 165 00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:03,640 Speaker 1: this is Fred, and I'm getting concerned. I wanted to 166 00:13:03,679 --> 00:13:07,400 Speaker 1: find out how Beth was, and I said, um, thank 167 00:13:07,440 --> 00:13:11,720 Speaker 1: you so much for calling, but unfortunately there were major 168 00:13:11,800 --> 00:13:15,520 Speaker 1: complications and Beth has been in a coma now for 169 00:13:15,559 --> 00:13:19,920 Speaker 1: a couple of weeks. And he said, I'd like to come. 170 00:13:21,160 --> 00:13:25,040 Speaker 1: I won't stay long, I promise, and um, so we 171 00:13:25,120 --> 00:13:29,680 Speaker 1: said okay. So a couple of days later and he 172 00:13:29,840 --> 00:13:34,760 Speaker 1: walked with a clarinet case. He placed it on Beth's 173 00:13:34,800 --> 00:13:41,600 Speaker 1: bed and he opened it slowly and took out King Friday, 174 00:13:41,840 --> 00:13:47,800 Speaker 1: Lady Elaine Fairchild, Daniel Striped Tiger, and Mio Mio pussy 175 00:13:47,880 --> 00:13:55,840 Speaker 1: Gat and Beth had her own neighborhood's show. I just 176 00:13:55,920 --> 00:14:03,840 Speaker 1: remember he was so genuinely concerned about Beth. He insisted 177 00:14:03,880 --> 00:14:07,120 Speaker 1: we take pictures with the puppets and Beth he's got 178 00:14:07,120 --> 00:14:10,160 Speaker 1: her feeding tube and she's hooked up the machines. And 179 00:14:10,679 --> 00:14:15,840 Speaker 1: I think what touched me the most was when he sang, 180 00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:19,520 Speaker 1: I love you just the way you are. It was 181 00:14:19,640 --> 00:14:25,040 Speaker 1: my dad, your mom, a few of my sisters, and 182 00:14:25,280 --> 00:14:29,960 Speaker 1: we were just outside the door of the room, and 183 00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:33,840 Speaker 1: I remember hearing that outside the door, and I looked 184 00:14:33,840 --> 00:14:38,680 Speaker 1: around at everybody, and even my dad had tears streaming 185 00:14:38,800 --> 00:14:44,920 Speaker 1: down their faces, and I remember just thinking, what am 186 00:14:44,960 --> 00:14:51,000 Speaker 1: I seeing here, this is incredible, and I honestly believed 187 00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:55,520 Speaker 1: Beth was going to wake up, that's how magical it was. 188 00:14:56,920 --> 00:15:01,840 Speaker 1: And when she didn't, I'm sorry, Mom, you know um, 189 00:15:01,880 --> 00:15:06,760 Speaker 1: but I remember afterwards we held hands around her bed 190 00:15:07,560 --> 00:15:13,680 Speaker 1: and we prayed, and that really gave us so much comfort. 191 00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:17,280 Speaker 1: I just remember feeling as though things are going to 192 00:15:17,400 --> 00:15:25,360 Speaker 1: be okay. Don't don't worry. It has a happy ending. 193 00:15:29,920 --> 00:15:32,320 Speaker 1: Beth Asher finally came out of her coma about three 194 00:15:32,360 --> 00:15:37,040 Speaker 1: weeks later. Mr George left all of his puppets. Oh 195 00:15:37,080 --> 00:15:39,960 Speaker 1: on my bed should I wouldn't wake up and be alone? 196 00:15:40,400 --> 00:15:49,360 Speaker 1: So I knew he came somehow. The surgery um it 197 00:15:49,560 --> 00:15:55,040 Speaker 1: left her hemiplegic, paralyzed on the right side, but it 198 00:15:55,200 --> 00:15:59,920 Speaker 1: also took away her right field of vision in both 199 00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:04,080 Speaker 1: eyes and and speaking and speaking because half of her 200 00:16:04,200 --> 00:16:10,160 Speaker 1: tongue is paralyzed. I talk it goodly now, but her 201 00:16:10,200 --> 00:16:18,840 Speaker 1: hearing is perfect, So it's now. Beth and Mr Rogers 202 00:16:18,880 --> 00:16:23,240 Speaker 1: corresponded throughout the years. He wrote many, many letters and 203 00:16:23,280 --> 00:16:29,240 Speaker 1: even called Beth birthday. Kathy and I both worked at 204 00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:32,520 Speaker 1: the University of Connecticut. Mom was put in charge of 205 00:16:32,560 --> 00:16:36,840 Speaker 1: finding someone for the commencement speaking, and so I suggested, 206 00:16:37,080 --> 00:16:41,160 Speaker 1: why not get Mr Rodgels and my mom and my 207 00:16:41,280 --> 00:16:43,960 Speaker 1: dad will both nervous that college kids I won't get 208 00:16:44,000 --> 00:16:46,720 Speaker 1: to listen to Mr Rodgels, And I said, no, no, 209 00:16:46,800 --> 00:16:49,760 Speaker 1: I think they'll listen. So I went ahead. I wrote 210 00:16:49,840 --> 00:16:51,920 Speaker 1: him a little He got right back to me, and 211 00:16:52,000 --> 00:16:55,840 Speaker 1: he said he would be delighted to, under one circumstance, 212 00:16:56,320 --> 00:16:59,480 Speaker 1: if I help him write his commencement address. I was 213 00:16:59,560 --> 00:17:02,640 Speaker 1: only two, you know, jow it at the time. So 214 00:17:02,800 --> 00:17:06,640 Speaker 1: Mr Rogers came and Brian and I have been involved 215 00:17:06,680 --> 00:17:11,920 Speaker 1: and intended a lot of graduation ceremonies, and we could 216 00:17:11,920 --> 00:17:18,000 Speaker 1: never quite hear the commencement address. The champagne corks going off, 217 00:17:18,480 --> 00:17:23,080 Speaker 1: the balloons and balls that are being bounced around in 218 00:17:23,160 --> 00:17:27,200 Speaker 1: this ceremony, you could hear a pin drop. And during 219 00:17:27,320 --> 00:17:32,400 Speaker 1: the address, he pointed to Beth in the audience and 220 00:17:32,480 --> 00:17:37,239 Speaker 1: he said, these words were provided to me by my 221 00:17:37,440 --> 00:17:41,639 Speaker 1: good friend Beth Usher. And what what what was the 222 00:17:41,680 --> 00:17:45,440 Speaker 1: main point of your advice to him when you wrote 223 00:17:45,440 --> 00:17:48,560 Speaker 1: back to him, do small kind each for other people. 224 00:17:48,920 --> 00:17:52,000 Speaker 1: Then they'll do small kind eats for other people and 225 00:17:52,080 --> 00:17:55,800 Speaker 1: maybe we'll start a chain reaction. And he also did 226 00:17:55,840 --> 00:18:01,960 Speaker 1: the take a moment to think about someone who helped you. 227 00:18:05,520 --> 00:18:09,280 Speaker 1: Fred Rogers did this often in speeches, asked crowds to 228 00:18:09,400 --> 00:18:12,159 Speaker 1: sit quietly and reflect on the people they love and 229 00:18:12,200 --> 00:18:15,199 Speaker 1: the people who love them. Like in this commencement address 230 00:18:15,240 --> 00:18:18,200 Speaker 1: at Dartmouth College, I'd like to give you all an 231 00:18:18,320 --> 00:18:24,600 Speaker 1: invisible gift, a gift of a silent minute to think 232 00:18:24,640 --> 00:18:29,880 Speaker 1: about those who have helped you become who you are today. 233 00:18:31,200 --> 00:18:36,920 Speaker 1: Wherever they are, if they've loved you and encouraged you 234 00:18:37,800 --> 00:18:42,639 Speaker 1: and wanted what was best in life for you, they're 235 00:18:42,720 --> 00:18:47,920 Speaker 1: right inside yourself, and I feel that you deserve quiet 236 00:18:48,080 --> 00:18:55,879 Speaker 1: time on this special occasion to devote some thought to them. 237 00:18:55,920 --> 00:18:59,240 Speaker 1: So let's just take a minute in honor of those 238 00:18:59,320 --> 00:19:04,840 Speaker 1: who have heard about us all along the way, one 239 00:19:04,880 --> 00:19:14,080 Speaker 1: silent minute. I have goose bumps now when you look 240 00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:19,919 Speaker 1: around at the audiences and students and parents, you just 241 00:19:20,040 --> 00:19:25,520 Speaker 1: see them like these big burly football basketball athletes with 242 00:19:25,640 --> 00:19:30,280 Speaker 1: tears streaming down their eyes. Um when when they were 243 00:19:30,720 --> 00:19:34,560 Speaker 1: asked to think about somebody who really helped them along 244 00:19:34,600 --> 00:19:51,800 Speaker 1: the way, Whomever you've been thinking about, Imagine how grateful 245 00:19:52,160 --> 00:19:57,600 Speaker 1: they must be that during your silent times you remember 246 00:19:57,680 --> 00:20:05,040 Speaker 1: how important they are to you. At the end of 247 00:20:05,080 --> 00:20:08,639 Speaker 1: the speech that Mr Rodgers gave, the President of Yukon 248 00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:12,440 Speaker 1: gave Mr Rodgers a present and it was this engraved 249 00:20:12,600 --> 00:20:16,560 Speaker 1: jewelry box and he hands it to my brother Brian 250 00:20:17,200 --> 00:20:21,320 Speaker 1: and said keep it until we meet again. He was 251 00:20:21,440 --> 00:20:27,440 Speaker 1: so aware that Beth's brother was kind of in the background, 252 00:20:28,200 --> 00:20:32,080 Speaker 1: and everybody was paying so much attention to Bath, as 253 00:20:32,119 --> 00:20:37,800 Speaker 1: they should. He made a point of asking him about 254 00:20:37,880 --> 00:20:43,160 Speaker 1: his life, about what he enjoyed doing, and Mr Rogers 255 00:20:43,200 --> 00:20:47,840 Speaker 1: paying attention to him really was huge, and he knew that. 256 00:21:05,000 --> 00:21:08,439 Speaker 1: One day I came home from work. I was making dinner. 257 00:21:08,600 --> 00:21:13,240 Speaker 1: I remember it profoundly. I was trying to make spaghetti 258 00:21:13,280 --> 00:21:17,359 Speaker 1: and meatballs, and I was rushing around multitasking, and the 259 00:21:17,400 --> 00:21:20,680 Speaker 1: phone rang and I picked it up, and he said, Kathy, 260 00:21:20,920 --> 00:21:23,800 Speaker 1: is this a good time to talk? This is Fred 261 00:21:24,600 --> 00:21:27,920 Speaker 1: And I went, oh, no, Fred, this is perfect. How 262 00:21:27,960 --> 00:21:31,080 Speaker 1: are you? He said, I just have a quick question. 263 00:21:32,359 --> 00:21:36,480 Speaker 1: Beth and Brian seemed to have such great self esteem, 264 00:21:36,520 --> 00:21:40,800 Speaker 1: and I just want to know what your philosophy is 265 00:21:41,080 --> 00:21:45,399 Speaker 1: and how you go about raising your children to have 266 00:21:45,600 --> 00:21:49,720 Speaker 1: such great self esteem. And I'm going on and on 267 00:21:49,840 --> 00:21:53,639 Speaker 1: and in the meantime, Brian comes home from work and 268 00:21:53,680 --> 00:21:57,480 Speaker 1: he's kind of listening to my side of the conversation. 269 00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:00,639 Speaker 1: And I said, okay, Fred, oh, of to you and 270 00:22:00,720 --> 00:22:04,520 Speaker 1: Joanne and and I hung up the phone. And Brian 271 00:22:04,600 --> 00:22:06,840 Speaker 1: said to me, who were you talking to? And I 272 00:22:06,880 --> 00:22:12,120 Speaker 1: said Mr Rogers And he said you we're telling Mr 273 00:22:12,240 --> 00:22:17,560 Speaker 1: Rogers about children and self esteem like and afterward I went, oh, 274 00:22:17,640 --> 00:22:21,560 Speaker 1: my goodness, what did I say. I'm telling the Guru 275 00:22:21,840 --> 00:22:25,679 Speaker 1: of children. Um. But that that was how he was. 276 00:22:26,160 --> 00:22:29,879 Speaker 1: He didn't feel he had all the answers he was 277 00:22:29,920 --> 00:22:37,080 Speaker 1: asking everybody else. Fred was always learning, always curious, always listening, 278 00:22:37,520 --> 00:22:41,080 Speaker 1: and he was always there. I mean, there's so many 279 00:22:41,119 --> 00:22:45,439 Speaker 1: stories about Fred showing up in surprising places, about his 280 00:22:45,560 --> 00:22:50,240 Speaker 1: kindness to people that he didn't even know. Kindness and 281 00:22:50,280 --> 00:22:54,760 Speaker 1: presence were what Fred believed in, maybe because that's what 282 00:22:55,000 --> 00:22:59,560 Speaker 1: God was for him, what goodness really meant, love and 283 00:22:59,800 --> 00:23:04,320 Speaker 1: of availability. So that's what he did as much as 284 00:23:04,320 --> 00:23:13,000 Speaker 1: he could in person and through his show. Next time. 285 00:23:13,480 --> 00:23:16,399 Speaker 1: Fred didn't call Mr Rogers Neighborhood a show, and he 286 00:23:16,440 --> 00:23:19,520 Speaker 1: didn't call it a program. What he called it was 287 00:23:19,600 --> 00:23:23,560 Speaker 1: a television visit. Think of what a visit is. A 288 00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:28,359 Speaker 1: visit is you and me together. He was talking with us, 289 00:23:28,560 --> 00:23:34,919 Speaker 1: not to us. Finding Fred is produced by Transmitter Media. 290 00:23:35,320 --> 00:23:38,720 Speaker 1: This episode was produced by Jordan Bailey. Our editor is 291 00:23:38,720 --> 00:23:42,600 Speaker 1: Sarah Nick's Special thanks to Michael Garofolo. The executive producer 292 00:23:42,600 --> 00:23:46,560 Speaker 1: for Transmitter Media is Greta Cone. Executive producers at Fatherly 293 00:23:46,640 --> 00:23:49,800 Speaker 1: are Simon Isaacs and Andrew Berman. Thanks to the team 294 00:23:49,800 --> 00:23:53,040 Speaker 1: at I Heeart Media, and thanks also to Beth Brian 295 00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:57,240 Speaker 1: and Kathy Usher. Our show is mixed by Rick Kwan, 296 00:23:57,480 --> 00:24:01,320 Speaker 1: music by Blue Dot Sessions and Alison Layton Brown. I'm 297 00:24:01,359 --> 00:24:03,560 Speaker 1: Carver Wallace. Thank you for listening.