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Speaker 1: Hi, everyone, Sophia Bush here. Welcome to Work in Progress,

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Speaker 1: where I talk to people who inspire me about how

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Speaker 1: they got to where they are and where they think

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Speaker 1: they're still going. I'm so excited to introduce you all

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Speaker 1: to my friend Sylvester McNutt the third today because it's

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Speaker 1: an inspirational conversation that will definitely leave you feeling motivated.

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Speaker 1: And I don't know about all of you, but I

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Speaker 1: have a hunch that that's something we could all use

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Speaker 1: right now. Sylvester is the author of care Package, Free

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Speaker 1: Your Energy, and many other books. He has an incredible

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Speaker 1: podcast and spends his time helping people understand how healing

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Speaker 1: can be the key to success. We recorded this episode

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Speaker 1: back in the beginning of April, but everything he says

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Speaker 1: is us as relevant now. He opens up about his past,

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Speaker 1: the impact of football in his life, and how a

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Speaker 1: few teachers gave him opportunities that completely changed his trajectory.

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Speaker 1: We also talk about the therapeutic benefits of writing and

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Speaker 1: what it really takes to heal yourself enjoy. So that's

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Speaker 1: they're of my friend, How are you? I'm so I'm

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Speaker 1: so excited that you're here. I'm so glad we're finally

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Speaker 1: going to have our conversation for the podcast. It's so

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Speaker 1: nice to see your face, albeit at a technological distance.

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Speaker 1: But we are in different states, so I guess we

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Speaker 1: would have had to do it this way no matter what.

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Speaker 1: I I really I'm so excited for the audience to

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Speaker 1: get to know you. I think that there are plenty

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Speaker 1: of people in my audience who who follow you. I

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Speaker 1: love to post your work and your writing and um,

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Speaker 1: and that's really how you and I met. I I

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Speaker 1: don't even know how it happened, but I we found

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Speaker 1: each other on the internet. UM. And I've always been

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Speaker 1: so taken aback by the things that I read that

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Speaker 1: you share. You know you are. You are a creator

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Speaker 1: whose words often give me pause in a really beautiful

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Speaker 1: way where I read something and I think, oh, let

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Speaker 1: me sit with that, or or oh that really that

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Speaker 1: causes such a feeling in me. I want to sit

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Speaker 1: with that. And I guess I just want to say

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Speaker 1: thank you for sharing yourself with the world the way

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Speaker 1: you do. Man, I wasn't expecting to hear that. Thank you,

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Speaker 1: Thank you very much. I appreciate it. Yeah, I think

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Speaker 1: the sharing, man, it's it's been a journey, for sure,

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Speaker 1: but I just feel like it's something I have to do.

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Speaker 1: I just have so much that happens inside of my head,

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Speaker 1: so many thoughts and so many observations, and I'm in

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Speaker 1: a good habit of sharing, and I think that it

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Speaker 1: helps me. It helps me understand what's going on with

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Speaker 1: within my own self. But then through the years of

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Speaker 1: doing it, it has, you know, helped thousands of other people.

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Speaker 1: And one thing I never want to do is like

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Speaker 1: I never want to tell people like this is how

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Speaker 1: you need to think, or this is how you need

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Speaker 1: to be, you know, because like I just believe in

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Speaker 1: free will and free expression, but I think we all

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Speaker 1: need help at different points of our lives to figure

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Speaker 1: out how we're processing things or how we're thinking about things,

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Speaker 1: you know, or or maybe it's like, hey, if I

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Speaker 1: just if I just shift my perspective, maybe two per

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Speaker 1: cent of this situation, I may be able to get

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Speaker 1: like a thousand more benefits out of it, you know.

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Speaker 1: And I think that's one of the things that drives me,

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Speaker 1: is just to try to try to put out multiple

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Speaker 1: perspectives just so people can can people can arrive at

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Speaker 1: their own conclusion. You know. That's really. Yeah, that's it

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Speaker 1: for me. That's like, okay, it's everyday thing for me.

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Speaker 1: So I'm always curious because I I sit across from

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Speaker 1: be It through a screener, you know, on the couch

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Speaker 1: in the office, sit across from a lot of people

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Speaker 1: whose perspectives, to your point, I really admire, and I'm

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Speaker 1: always curious how they got this way because I've I've

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Speaker 1: known you for the last couple of years. But were

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Speaker 1: you were you like this when you were a little kid?

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Speaker 1: You know, I wonder who was Sylvester at like eight

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Speaker 1: or ten? I I know you grew up in Chicago,

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Speaker 1: which makes me feel very nostalgic. I I I wonder

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Speaker 1: where you introspective and curious and and into writing then?

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Speaker 1: Or or how how did how did the journey begin?

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Speaker 1: Let's go back all right? So first of all, our

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Speaker 1: brains are like because this is the same question that

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Speaker 1: kind of are people towards on my podcast, because I'm

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Speaker 1: so curious, like I want to know like the genesis,

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Speaker 1: I want to know the starting point, like you know,

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Speaker 1: what were some of the factors. So this is this

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Speaker 1: is just a great question to me. Uh So eight

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Speaker 1: to ten um, I would have been in uh, northwest

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Speaker 1: suburbs of Chicago. So I was living in Mount Prospect

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Speaker 1: in Arlington Heights, Okay. And that's right around the age

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Speaker 1: where you start having a lot of a lot of questions.

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Speaker 1: You know. That's when you start asking questions like it's

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Speaker 1: Santa Claus real, Like what do I have to go

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Speaker 1: to church? Why do I have a bad time? You know,

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Speaker 1: you start you start asking those questions to your parents. Um,

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Speaker 1: you start liking girls in school, but you don't even

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Speaker 1: know what that means. You know, you just have all

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Speaker 1: this stuff going on. And what was going on is

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Speaker 1: my parents were Okay. So my mom worked. She was

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Speaker 1: an administrative assistant. She is a very like punctual. She

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Speaker 1: pronounces every word she does not. She didn't allow any

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Speaker 1: of us to speak slang. We had to be proper English.

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Speaker 1: We couldn't say things like come on, man, or you

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Speaker 1: know what I mean, like, none of that. It had

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Speaker 1: to be all the time, precise words, precise language. And

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Speaker 1: that was rooted in her being an avid reader. I

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Speaker 1: mean she would read every single day. I remember seeing

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Speaker 1: her read every single day. My dad, he was United

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Speaker 1: States Military, so he's getting up at five am to

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Speaker 1: get his work out in he's punctual. He's we can't

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Speaker 1: be if if the show starts at nine, we can't

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Speaker 1: get there at nine oh one, we can't be late.

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Speaker 1: It's it was a very I lived in a very

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Speaker 1: like disciplined household and it was also very disciplined from

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Speaker 1: like an intellectual side where my mom had the readings.

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Speaker 1: But my dad was really into cinema and film. So

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Speaker 1: my dad when we would sit down, he will watch,

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Speaker 1: we will watch films like we will watch Bruce Lee films.

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Speaker 1: And he would and I know you could appreciate this,

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Speaker 1: you know, working in working in TV and film. Like

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Speaker 1: he would make me watch the scenes and he like

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Speaker 1: every time that the camera would cut, he knew all

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Speaker 1: the cuts, so he would tell me, but he'd like

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Speaker 1: what type of cut is that? You know? Or when

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Speaker 1: the audio like you do like a Jay Hookie, Like

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Speaker 1: what what type of audio is that? Like? He would

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Speaker 1: teach me everything about film. He would teach me about

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Speaker 1: the acting side of it and like how they were

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Speaker 1: taught to you know, hold emotions or to express emotions

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Speaker 1: that they weren't even feeling, but they had to portray it.

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Speaker 1: And then my mom was on the other side talking

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Speaker 1: about the writing, like the actual writing side, and like

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Speaker 1: she read um like Patricia Patterson, John Grisham, like she read.

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Speaker 1: She would read these like huge novels. And at eight

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Speaker 1: to ten, I would pick these up and try to

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Speaker 1: read them. But I couldn't. Like I couldn't read, I

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Speaker 1: couldn't comprehend what was going on. But I would try,

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Speaker 1: and you know, I will open I would take I

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Speaker 1: would go to a page and I would just give

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Speaker 1: my mom the book and I would say, hey, read

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Speaker 1: this to me, you know. Then she would just read

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Speaker 1: like thirty pages to me out the book and I

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Speaker 1: would just sit there, but I will close my eyes

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Speaker 1: while she would read, and then I will visualize what

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Speaker 1: she was reading and what ended up happening. And I

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Speaker 1: didn't realize this then, but just talking about it now

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Speaker 1: made me realize it. What what happened is I would

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Speaker 1: see the words that she was saying. And then even

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Speaker 1: when my dad was having me watch movies with him,

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Speaker 1: I would be able to just see the words. I

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Speaker 1: would be able to predict how the scenes we're gonna go.

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Speaker 1: And it was like through those practices with them that

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Speaker 1: I started to develop, uh, the ability to to write.

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Speaker 1: I started to develop like the love for it. So

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Speaker 1: then what happened with me was as I got just

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Speaker 1: a little bit older. I'm gonna tell your story here.

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Speaker 1: So I was very introverted. I never I never really

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Speaker 1: was extroverted. I was very very introverted. Um before high school.

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Speaker 1: I changed a little bit in high school. But before

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Speaker 1: high school, I was very interested, introverted, very very quiet,

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Speaker 1: very to myself, very observant. I mean I always had

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Speaker 1: a lot of friends, always played with other kids, other

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Speaker 1: boy is in the neighborhood. Like we always play sports,

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Speaker 1: you know, football, basketball, soccer, We used to raise We

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Speaker 1: used to ride bikes, I used to play. I used

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Speaker 1: to have a bunch of friends. But I was always quiet.

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Speaker 1: I was always quiet. And so in seventh grade, you know,

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Speaker 1: you ride at the bus home from school, but you know,

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Speaker 1: I'm living in the suburbs and it's very it's just

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Speaker 1: not a good environment. A bunch of kids on the

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Speaker 1: bus is you know, they're just wild. And I had

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Speaker 1: a younger brother and sister. So I'm a person that

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Speaker 1: at a young age I realized I needed alone time.

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Speaker 1: I needed alone time in order for me to be

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Speaker 1: my best self. Right, And so I have a younger

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Speaker 1: brother and sister. At the house, I have mom and dad,

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Speaker 1: so it's like if I'm at home, everybody else is home,

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Speaker 1: so there's no alone time there. If I'm at school,

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Speaker 1: I'm with all my classmates. I was smart enough to

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Speaker 1: figure out that if I just walked home, I could

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Speaker 1: be alone for about thirty minutes. So I just started

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Speaker 1: walking to and from school, and I'm walking home by myself,

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Speaker 1: and uh there was this girl. Her name was Leanne,

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Speaker 1: and she walked up to me one day. I walked

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Speaker 1: right outside the school and she's like, hey, I noticed

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Speaker 1: that you walk home the same way I walk every day,

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Speaker 1: so we're gonna walk together. And I was like, yeah, no, no, no,

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Speaker 1: we're not. Actually we're not. Because she was a grade

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Speaker 1: older than me. I think I was seventh grade. She

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Speaker 1: was eighth grade. I think I think that was a

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Speaker 1: grade and uh yeah, yeah, that was it. And I

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Speaker 1: was like, no, we're not. Actually, you're gonna do what

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Speaker 1: you've been doing and I'm going to continue on my way.

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Speaker 1: I've never even met her, right, So she goes, no, no, no,

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Speaker 1: we're gonna walk home together because we walked right by

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Speaker 1: each other every single day. I've been seeing you for weeks,

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Speaker 1: so I was like, okay, all right. Finally I was like,

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Speaker 1: all right, I'll do it. So I walk her home

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Speaker 1: a couple of times, so basically it would be like

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Speaker 1: a quarter mile to her house and then my my

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Speaker 1: house was like a mile. So I will walk her

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Speaker 1: home and then I will continue on. So finally one

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Speaker 1: day she's like, she's like, hey, you need to walk

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Speaker 1: me up to my door today. And I'm like, why

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Speaker 1: would I do that. I've never walked you up to

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Speaker 1: your door. That doesn't like, what's it will be the

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Speaker 1: point of doing that. And she's like, no, come on,

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Speaker 1: you know, walk me to my door. And she's like

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Speaker 1: giving me all these cues and these signals, and I'm

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Speaker 1: like oblivious, I have no idea what she's doing. And

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Speaker 1: I think I was seventh grade. I was. I was

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Speaker 1: twelve and seventh grade, yeah, because I started high school

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Speaker 1: when I was still thirteen, so I was I would

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Speaker 1: have been, right, I think, yeah, so I would have.

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Speaker 1: I was twelve years old and standing at her door,

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Speaker 1: She's like, okay, I'm going in now, and I'm just like, okay,

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Speaker 1: all right, see you later, and she just grabs me

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Speaker 1: and she just like puts me like a bear hug,

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Speaker 1: and she just starts making out with me. So this

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Speaker 1: is the first time I ever kissed a girl. So

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Speaker 1: I didn't know what I was doing. Like I felt

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Speaker 1: her tongue in mind, so I was just like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: I guess I'm supposed to do that. So I just

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Speaker 1: put my tongue out, like I'm just clueless. So she

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Speaker 1: goes in the house. And she lived in like a

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Speaker 1: little like red brick apartment. It was like it was

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Speaker 1: a flat. And she goes in the house and I

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Speaker 1: started walking home and I'm just thinking, I'm like, why

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Speaker 1: that was amazing, Like I just kissed the girl for

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Speaker 1: the first time. So I walked the rest of that

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Speaker 1: seven point five miles. I walked with the biggest smile

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Speaker 1: on my face. And I get home and my mom

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Speaker 1: is there, and my mom is a very she's a

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Speaker 1: very entertaining person, to say the least. And she goes,

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Speaker 1: what are you smiling about? Boy? She would always call

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Speaker 1: me boy. She goes, what are you smiling about? Boy?

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Speaker 1: And I'm like, you know nothing, no, no big deal,

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Speaker 1: you know nothing. I feel I'm ready to tell you.

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Speaker 1: She's like, no, no, no, what, What's what's going on?

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Speaker 1: You never walk in like this, Why are you smiling?

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Speaker 1: What's going on? And I'm like, uh, you know, well,

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Speaker 1: you know, there's just a girl, Yain. I've been walking

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Speaker 1: home with her, you know, and she kissed me behind

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Speaker 1: the seven eleven. We made out. She kissed me, you know,

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Speaker 1: the first time I ever kissed a girl. My mom

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Speaker 1: immediately gets pissed. She's angry. Yeah, she's angry. Her exact

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Speaker 1: words to his day. I'll never forget. She goes. I

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Speaker 1: didn't give you any permission to kiss girls. She goes,

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Speaker 1: you need to leave these girls alone and you need

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Speaker 1: to focus on your school work. And it was like

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Speaker 1: that was one of the most defining moments of my

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Speaker 1: life because here I am, you know, twelve years old,

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Speaker 1: having my first sexual experience, and it's met with Shane,

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Speaker 1: it's met with with gilt, it's met with rejection, it's

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Speaker 1: met with your doing something wrong. And that was like

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Speaker 1: it was such a like painful thing for me to

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Speaker 1: have something so powerful happened a girl kissing you, especially

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Speaker 1: she's a year older than you, you know, amongst guys,

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Speaker 1: when you're a young boy, that's like a big deal,

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Speaker 1: Like you got an eight grader to kiss you when

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Speaker 1: you're in seventh grade, like that's a big deal. So

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Speaker 1: I'm thinking it was like this beautiful thing that happened,

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Speaker 1: and I shared with my mom and she just like

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Speaker 1: broke me down. And when she broke me down, I

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Speaker 1: had all these like feelings came about, you know, and

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Speaker 1: I didn't understand it. I didn't know what shame was killed,

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Speaker 1: the rejection, the things that I have the awareness of now,

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Speaker 1: I didn't know. So I just had all these feelings

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Speaker 1: going on inside of me. So now I don't want

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Speaker 1: to talk to Leanne because I feel like I can't.

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Speaker 1: So I'm taking a different route home, you know. So

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Speaker 1: it's just like all these emotions I had and I

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Speaker 1: couldn't understand it. So I didn't have any extra money.

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Speaker 1: My family, you know, middle class family. We weren't poor,

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Speaker 1: we weren't rich. They had enough for us to get by,

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Speaker 1: so I didn't want to ask for any money. But

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Speaker 1: I knew I needed to kind of express what was

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Speaker 1: going on, and my family, my family did, My immediate

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Speaker 1: family did what most families do. When we get with

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Speaker 1: our extended family, we kinda we don't tell the full truth,

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Speaker 1: the full spectrum of what's going on. How is everything. Oh, yeah,

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Speaker 1: everything's great. Yeah, the kids are good. You know. That's

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Speaker 1: that's what my mom and dad would do. But that

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Speaker 1: wasn't the truth. That wasn't the truth of what was

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Speaker 1: going on. And this was a time period where they

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Speaker 1: also started to kind of they started to become alcoholics.

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Speaker 1: My mom, her her poison would be uh mg D

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Speaker 1: Miller genuine draft. She would drink a six pack every night.

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Speaker 1: My dad, his was Jack Daniels. He would he would

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Speaker 1: drink it on the rocks. I don't know how people

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Speaker 1: do that, but he would. He would drinking on the rocks.

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Speaker 1: So here I am, and I'm watching what was like

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Speaker 1: a perfect, like nuclear family where there was a lot

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Speaker 1: of love, there was playing, We used to watch movies,

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Speaker 1: we used to we used to do all types of

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Speaker 1: stuff together. But it's like deteriorating, right, and then there's

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Speaker 1: all these elements that are coming in, you know, with

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Speaker 1: the shame and the guilt, um angered um abuse, physical abuse,

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Speaker 1: uh you know, emotional abuse. And it wasn't just on me,

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Speaker 1: it was everyone. It was the whole environment, you know.

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Speaker 1: It was dad to mom, Mom to dad, them to me.

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Speaker 1: And I'm just like watching this environment like deteriorate. So

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Speaker 1: my saving grace and what what really helped me here

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Speaker 1: was that same seven eleven that I would walk by,

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Speaker 1: I went in there and I stole a notebook. You know,

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Speaker 1: I didn't have any money, like I said, so I

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Speaker 1: just went in there. I found a little like college

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00:15:59,640 --> 00:16:01,720
Speaker 1: ruled book, you know, something like this, and I just

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Speaker 1: stole it. I just put in my book bag, walked out,

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Speaker 1: and I stole the notebook. And you know, I know

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Speaker 1: stealing is wrong, but also keeping those emotions on me

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Speaker 1: would have been even worse for me. So I needed

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Speaker 1: I needed some outlet. So what ended up happening was

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Speaker 1: when I got home, after I stole the notebook, I

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Speaker 1: just opened it up and I just started writing. I

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Speaker 1: ended up writing like pages just about you know, my mom,

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Speaker 1: my dad, what I was seeing, what I was feeling,

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Speaker 1: what I was thinking. And then I started writing about

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Speaker 1: ways that they could they could solve the way they

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00:16:32,400 --> 00:16:34,480
Speaker 1: were talking to each other, you know, because I was

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Speaker 1: listening to like their tone of voice and how they

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Speaker 1: were just talking, and like I was just trying to

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Speaker 1: come up with certain ways, like man, if my mom

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Speaker 1: would have just said this, or my dad would have

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Speaker 1: just said this, and so really, you know when people

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Speaker 1: see me now and they see like an author of

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00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:50,240
Speaker 1: eight books, and you know, I've traveled and talked to

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Speaker 1: people about these things. That really started from that twelve

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Speaker 1: year old kid who was completely confused about kissing a

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Speaker 1: girl Like that's literally where it started from. So that's

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Speaker 1: how I got started as a writer. That's so cool,

329
00:17:05,680 --> 00:17:08,800
Speaker 1: did you because you know you talk about the way

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Speaker 1: the dynamic in the family began shifting and and things

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Speaker 1: so tragically for people can do that when substance abuse happens,

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Speaker 1: when when the addiction gene turns on, and you know

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Speaker 1: that image of you listening to your mom read and

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Speaker 1: as a little boy, essentially becoming a reader through her,

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Speaker 1: I can't imagine what it felt like to begin to

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Speaker 1: lose that. Did you become a big reader as you

337
00:17:40,040 --> 00:17:44,560
Speaker 1: got older, to kind of hold onto your love of

338
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Speaker 1: books in that way, or or did that not happen

339
00:17:47,080 --> 00:17:50,040
Speaker 1: until later. I was a big reader as a kid,

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Speaker 1: I think now, if I compare the amount that I

341
00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:56,280
Speaker 1: read now, I think I read more than the average person.

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Speaker 1: But I don't read as much as I could because

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00:18:00,560 --> 00:18:04,399
Speaker 1: I spend more of my time writing. But if I

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00:18:04,440 --> 00:18:07,000
Speaker 1: wasn't writing as a profession, I would be a huge reader.

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00:18:07,040 --> 00:18:09,280
Speaker 1: I would read every day for an hour or two

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Speaker 1: every single day. As a kid, I was a huge,

347
00:18:12,720 --> 00:18:14,920
Speaker 1: huge reader. I would read every single day. I mean

348
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Speaker 1: even in high school. You know, you have the stuff

349
00:18:17,160 --> 00:18:18,439
Speaker 1: that they want you to read, but I would have

350
00:18:18,480 --> 00:18:20,280
Speaker 1: my own books. I would go to the library. You

351
00:18:20,359 --> 00:18:22,960
Speaker 1: get two weeks with a book, so I'll take a book,

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Speaker 1: reading in two weeks, bring it back, check out another one,

353
00:18:25,640 --> 00:18:28,440
Speaker 1: you know, even in high school. So I've always been

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00:18:28,680 --> 00:18:32,719
Speaker 1: a big reader. Um, I think, yeah, that is because

355
00:18:32,800 --> 00:18:34,720
Speaker 1: because of my mom. I mean even to this day,

356
00:18:34,760 --> 00:18:37,200
Speaker 1: she still has her stack of books, you know that

357
00:18:37,320 --> 00:18:40,159
Speaker 1: she goes through. You know, she's a book quarter. So

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Speaker 1: you know, I would not be I wouldn't be an

359
00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:44,879
Speaker 1: author if it wasn't for my mom's reading. Uh. And

360
00:18:44,920 --> 00:18:46,600
Speaker 1: my dad he was a writer too. He used to

361
00:18:46,600 --> 00:18:49,600
Speaker 1: always write scripts. And that's the reason why he would

362
00:18:49,640 --> 00:18:51,200
Speaker 1: have me sit down and watch the movies with him,

363
00:18:51,240 --> 00:18:53,400
Speaker 1: is because he wanted to eventually get a script done.

364
00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:56,840
Speaker 1: And I think my my love for writing just literally

365
00:18:56,880 --> 00:19:02,960
Speaker 1: came from their hobbies. That's very cool. It's interesting because

366
00:19:03,080 --> 00:19:04,879
Speaker 1: when you talk about the way your dad was breaking

367
00:19:04,880 --> 00:19:09,000
Speaker 1: down movies with you. I think about what an incredible

368
00:19:09,160 --> 00:19:12,399
Speaker 1: education and storytelling that is for a kid. You know,

369
00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:14,439
Speaker 1: the way the scenes are cut and the way the

370
00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:18,200
Speaker 1: actors are performing, in the way that things look and

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00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:21,760
Speaker 1: feel and sound, that's that's kind of incredible. That's the

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00:19:21,760 --> 00:19:23,840
Speaker 1: stuff that makes me wish I'd gone to film school.

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Speaker 1: You know, where where did sports come in for you?

374
00:19:29,640 --> 00:19:32,440
Speaker 1: Because I know there's a there's a whole world of

375
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:37,920
Speaker 1: athleticism in your story, So when when does all that begin?

376
00:19:38,600 --> 00:19:42,720
Speaker 1: So sports for me has always been a safe haven,

377
00:19:42,800 --> 00:19:45,320
Speaker 1: a way to just kind of escape what what I was,

378
00:19:45,440 --> 00:19:47,840
Speaker 1: what I was dealing with. Uh, And like I said,

379
00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:50,560
Speaker 1: it started just in the neighborhood, just running races. You know,

380
00:19:50,600 --> 00:19:52,760
Speaker 1: you get a bunch of young boys together, they always

381
00:19:52,760 --> 00:19:55,440
Speaker 1: want to figure out who's the strongest, who's the fastest,

382
00:19:55,440 --> 00:19:58,119
Speaker 1: who's the smartest. That's what That's just what young boys

383
00:19:58,200 --> 00:20:00,320
Speaker 1: were doing. And I know that I've always had like

384
00:20:00,359 --> 00:20:02,399
Speaker 1: a group of guy friends at every age. You know,

385
00:20:02,440 --> 00:20:04,760
Speaker 1: we moved a lot, but I always wanted to make

386
00:20:04,960 --> 00:20:08,240
Speaker 1: new guy friends. And it's just that that masculine edge

387
00:20:08,240 --> 00:20:10,560
Speaker 1: of masculine competitiveness that I feel like it's such a

388
00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:13,359
Speaker 1: big part of you know, being socialized, just as from

389
00:20:13,400 --> 00:20:15,639
Speaker 1: a boy to a man. So we were just you know,

390
00:20:15,680 --> 00:20:17,800
Speaker 1: we didn't have you know, the cell phones and smartphones.

391
00:20:17,840 --> 00:20:19,879
Speaker 1: We we'd be outside racing each other, like all right,

392
00:20:19,880 --> 00:20:22,240
Speaker 1: who's the fastest zone? So we raised we see who

393
00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:25,119
Speaker 1: could throw the football, the furthest we throw baseball, and

394
00:20:25,160 --> 00:20:27,000
Speaker 1: it was just I mean, that's just what we did,

395
00:20:27,080 --> 00:20:30,880
Speaker 1: you know. And then like WWF came about the wrestling,

396
00:20:30,920 --> 00:20:33,760
Speaker 1: So then we started wrestling, like which that was not smart,

397
00:20:33,880 --> 00:20:36,280
Speaker 1: but we started wrestling in the house and doing all

398
00:20:36,280 --> 00:20:38,960
Speaker 1: these wrestling moves and it was just I mean, it

399
00:20:39,040 --> 00:20:41,040
Speaker 1: was just such a good way to just bond, you know,

400
00:20:41,119 --> 00:20:45,719
Speaker 1: just sports. So we ended up happening was I always

401
00:20:45,720 --> 00:20:48,600
Speaker 1: will watch and growing up in Chicago, everyone's die hard

402
00:20:48,680 --> 00:20:53,600
Speaker 1: Chicago Bear fan, die hard, Chicago's Cubs, Chicago Blackhawks, Chicago Bulls.

403
00:20:53,600 --> 00:20:55,360
Speaker 1: Like we're die hard. It's just part of who we are,

404
00:20:55,840 --> 00:20:58,440
Speaker 1: you know. Um, you know a lot of people these days,

405
00:20:58,480 --> 00:21:02,320
Speaker 1: you know, you will argue politics. In Chicago, we talked

406
00:21:02,359 --> 00:21:04,800
Speaker 1: about sports. We archie sports, you know, that's what we do.

407
00:21:04,920 --> 00:21:09,160
Speaker 1: We talk about sports. And you know, just growing up,

408
00:21:09,520 --> 00:21:12,719
Speaker 1: you know, every Sunday, the family and get together extended family,

409
00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:14,919
Speaker 1: people go to the bars. Obviously I was too young

410
00:21:14,960 --> 00:21:16,480
Speaker 1: for that, but I would still see it, people going

411
00:21:16,520 --> 00:21:20,040
Speaker 1: to the bars, just tailgate and pregame and watching the games,

412
00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:23,760
Speaker 1: watching football, Like I would watch football every Sunday. So

413
00:21:23,800 --> 00:21:26,919
Speaker 1: of course we get a Super Nintendo and I'm playing

414
00:21:27,080 --> 00:21:30,399
Speaker 1: uh or maybe it was a regular Nintendo. I started

415
00:21:30,400 --> 00:21:32,960
Speaker 1: playing this game called Techno Super Bowl and it was

416
00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:35,600
Speaker 1: a football game, and it was just like the best

417
00:21:35,640 --> 00:21:38,439
Speaker 1: game ever. Like, the graphics are horrible, but it was

418
00:21:38,560 --> 00:21:43,280
Speaker 1: amazing then. And my love for football came from, you know,

419
00:21:43,359 --> 00:21:46,080
Speaker 1: watching my family watch how they would get so excited

420
00:21:46,160 --> 00:21:48,920
Speaker 1: just seeing people out and about rocking the Bears jerseys

421
00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:51,600
Speaker 1: watching it on TV, Like I just it was just

422
00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:54,719
Speaker 1: such a glamorous thing, you know. I'm just like, oh man,

423
00:21:54,760 --> 00:21:57,560
Speaker 1: I want to be one of those dudes. And what

424
00:21:57,560 --> 00:21:59,480
Speaker 1: what sealed it for me is me and my dad

425
00:21:59,480 --> 00:22:01,000
Speaker 1: were at a ark one time and it was just

426
00:22:01,040 --> 00:22:05,040
Speaker 1: me and my dad and we were flying kites. And

427
00:22:05,359 --> 00:22:08,240
Speaker 1: if you have you ever flown a kite before? Yeah,

428
00:22:08,400 --> 00:22:11,000
Speaker 1: not a long time though. Flying a kite is one

429
00:22:11,040 --> 00:22:15,119
Speaker 1: of the most frustrating things that you can do, because

430
00:22:15,160 --> 00:22:16,919
Speaker 1: if you don't get like the right I don't know

431
00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:19,280
Speaker 1: if it's drag or lift. I don't know the right turns.

432
00:22:19,280 --> 00:22:20,960
Speaker 1: But if you don't get the right pocket of air

433
00:22:21,040 --> 00:22:24,080
Speaker 1: under it, it doesn't go anywhere. And my dad's like

434
00:22:24,320 --> 00:22:26,760
Speaker 1: he's like a mad scientist, like he would just he

435
00:22:26,760 --> 00:22:29,240
Speaker 1: would just reel it out nice and slow at patients,

436
00:22:29,600 --> 00:22:31,639
Speaker 1: and the kite would just get bigger and bigger and bigger,

437
00:22:31,680 --> 00:22:33,160
Speaker 1: and it'd be like a hundred feet in the air,

438
00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:35,399
Speaker 1: and mine is like ten feet on the ground, just

439
00:22:35,440 --> 00:22:37,920
Speaker 1: flopping around, and I'm just like I would just get

440
00:22:37,920 --> 00:22:40,640
Speaker 1: defeated and I would just start crying. And so we're

441
00:22:40,680 --> 00:22:43,680
Speaker 1: at this park and I'm crying, flying trying to fly

442
00:22:43,720 --> 00:22:45,640
Speaker 1: a kite. My dad's got his in the air. He's

443
00:22:45,640 --> 00:22:50,200
Speaker 1: just looking up. And one of the football came flying

444
00:22:50,240 --> 00:22:51,879
Speaker 1: at me and they just like bounced over to me.

445
00:22:52,200 --> 00:22:54,280
Speaker 1: So I threw my kite and I picked up the

446
00:22:54,280 --> 00:22:56,560
Speaker 1: ball and then I threw it back to to to

447
00:22:56,680 --> 00:22:59,520
Speaker 1: the guy and they were like practicing football, and they

448
00:22:59,520 --> 00:23:02,119
Speaker 1: had all their gear on and their helmets on, and

449
00:23:02,160 --> 00:23:03,800
Speaker 1: you know, you're a little kid and you're looking up

450
00:23:03,840 --> 00:23:06,320
Speaker 1: to bigger kids. I'm assuming these were like high school kids,

451
00:23:06,680 --> 00:23:09,480
Speaker 1: you know, or maybe even pee week kids, but you

452
00:23:09,480 --> 00:23:12,800
Speaker 1: you look up at them and they're like giants. And

453
00:23:12,920 --> 00:23:15,119
Speaker 1: I just remember thinking like, oh, I want to be

454
00:23:15,200 --> 00:23:18,120
Speaker 1: a giant, you know. And so I went and told

455
00:23:18,160 --> 00:23:20,000
Speaker 1: my dad. I'm like, hey, I want to play football.

456
00:23:20,160 --> 00:23:22,760
Speaker 1: Sign me up. And it was that day that when

457
00:23:22,760 --> 00:23:24,880
Speaker 1: I went to the park and my mom and dad

458
00:23:24,880 --> 00:23:27,760
Speaker 1: were like, nope, you're not playing football, and sports dangerous.

459
00:23:27,800 --> 00:23:31,120
Speaker 1: People get hurt, people get concussions, and I just say, hey,

460
00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:33,240
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna get hurt. Just sign me up, you know.

461
00:23:34,119 --> 00:23:37,359
Speaker 1: So they wouldn't sign me up. So, uh, fifth grade,

462
00:23:37,400 --> 00:23:39,959
Speaker 1: sixth grade, they wouldn't sign me up. So seventh grade,

463
00:23:40,240 --> 00:23:42,960
Speaker 1: I'm like, hey, I'm bigger, I'm a stronger person. Now.

464
00:23:43,160 --> 00:23:44,359
Speaker 1: I used to do push ups. I should do a

465
00:23:44,400 --> 00:23:46,560
Speaker 1: hundred push ups every day because my dad told me.

466
00:23:46,600 --> 00:23:48,000
Speaker 1: He was like, if you want to play football, you

467
00:23:48,040 --> 00:23:50,000
Speaker 1: need to be strong. So I said, okay, what do

468
00:23:50,040 --> 00:23:51,320
Speaker 1: I need to do? He says, you need to do

469
00:23:51,359 --> 00:23:54,080
Speaker 1: push ups. You know. He says, I'm in the army.

470
00:23:54,080 --> 00:23:55,760
Speaker 1: I used to do about five hundred a day, So

471
00:23:55,800 --> 00:23:57,960
Speaker 1: can you do five hundred. I'm like, well, I don't

472
00:23:57,960 --> 00:23:59,600
Speaker 1: know if I can do five hundred. So I just

473
00:23:59,640 --> 00:24:01,080
Speaker 1: started doing him and I got up to like a

474
00:24:01,119 --> 00:24:04,040
Speaker 1: hundred push ups today as a seventh grader. So I

475
00:24:04,520 --> 00:24:05,680
Speaker 1: went to him. I'm like, hey, I could do a

476
00:24:05,760 --> 00:24:08,560
Speaker 1: hundred push ups. I want to play football. So he

477
00:24:08,640 --> 00:24:10,639
Speaker 1: got he was drinking too this time. This was this

478
00:24:10,680 --> 00:24:12,879
Speaker 1: was in the summer. So he goes, all right, let

479
00:24:12,880 --> 00:24:15,320
Speaker 1: me see, let me see your pushups. So I get down.

480
00:24:15,400 --> 00:24:16,800
Speaker 1: It takes me a little while, but I do like

481
00:24:16,800 --> 00:24:18,359
Speaker 1: a hundred push ups in front of and they're like

482
00:24:18,400 --> 00:24:21,159
Speaker 1: little baby push ups, you know, seventh grader. And he

483
00:24:21,240 --> 00:24:24,160
Speaker 1: was like, okay, I'll think about it. So I went

484
00:24:24,200 --> 00:24:26,719
Speaker 1: from like a no to I'll think about it. So

485
00:24:26,760 --> 00:24:29,120
Speaker 1: I left the house that day. I'll never forget this.

486
00:24:29,600 --> 00:24:33,200
Speaker 1: And my friend his name was Adam McElroy, Irish guy,

487
00:24:33,440 --> 00:24:36,920
Speaker 1: and he played for the Arlington Cowboys because we lived

488
00:24:36,920 --> 00:24:41,159
Speaker 1: in Arlington Heights. Arlington Cowboys was the Peewee league. So

489
00:24:41,200 --> 00:24:43,080
Speaker 1: I'm over at his house, his mom, his mom, and

490
00:24:43,160 --> 00:24:45,280
Speaker 1: his his dad was a cop. His mom was there

491
00:24:45,880 --> 00:24:47,919
Speaker 1: and we're just talking about football. They're like, hey, are

492
00:24:47,920 --> 00:24:50,560
Speaker 1: you gonna play with us this year? And I was like, yeah, yeah, yeah.

493
00:24:50,600 --> 00:24:52,240
Speaker 1: My dad said I could play this year, which my

494
00:24:52,320 --> 00:24:55,320
Speaker 1: dad didn't say, but I lied It's like, my dad

495
00:24:55,359 --> 00:24:58,119
Speaker 1: said I could play this year. So they had some

496
00:24:58,200 --> 00:25:02,600
Speaker 1: type of registration later that night. So I'm like thinking, like, hey,

497
00:25:02,680 --> 00:25:05,080
Speaker 1: if I just stayed with Adam, I'll be able to

498
00:25:05,119 --> 00:25:08,000
Speaker 1: register for football. So I literally stayed at his house

499
00:25:08,040 --> 00:25:10,000
Speaker 1: the whole day. I was supposed to go back home,

500
00:25:10,280 --> 00:25:12,160
Speaker 1: but I just stayed at this house the whole day.

501
00:25:12,440 --> 00:25:15,439
Speaker 1: We ended up going to the registration and then we

502
00:25:15,480 --> 00:25:18,520
Speaker 1: got registered, and you know, you need you need permission.

503
00:25:19,080 --> 00:25:21,040
Speaker 1: So I told his mom. I was like, yeah, my

504
00:25:21,119 --> 00:25:22,640
Speaker 1: dad said I could play, so you know, you could

505
00:25:22,640 --> 00:25:24,639
Speaker 1: just sign for him he's at work, which he wasn't,

506
00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:28,000
Speaker 1: and so his mom signed for me. So I got

507
00:25:28,040 --> 00:25:31,119
Speaker 1: registered for football that way. I went home. I told

508
00:25:31,119 --> 00:25:32,760
Speaker 1: my parents. I was like, yeah, so I got registered

509
00:25:32,800 --> 00:25:34,560
Speaker 1: for football. And then my dad was like, how did

510
00:25:34,600 --> 00:25:36,879
Speaker 1: you get registered? You know? So he started doing the

511
00:25:36,880 --> 00:25:40,679
Speaker 1: mental work and I was like, well, I'll be honest

512
00:25:40,760 --> 00:25:43,480
Speaker 1: with you, I had two six you know, to forge

513
00:25:43,480 --> 00:25:46,679
Speaker 1: your signature. He was pissed. He was he was pissed.

514
00:25:46,880 --> 00:25:50,000
Speaker 1: My dad was pissed, but he kind of sat there

515
00:25:50,040 --> 00:25:51,840
Speaker 1: for a second and he thought about it and he

516
00:25:51,920 --> 00:25:54,800
Speaker 1: was just like Okay. He's like, if you're willing to

517
00:25:54,800 --> 00:25:57,240
Speaker 1: do all of that to play football. We're gonna allow

518
00:25:57,280 --> 00:25:59,680
Speaker 1: you to play football. So if you're if you're going,

519
00:25:59,720 --> 00:26:03,160
Speaker 1: if you're willing to do all of that, you can play.

520
00:26:03,440 --> 00:26:05,280
Speaker 1: And it was one of the best things. I played

521
00:26:05,280 --> 00:26:08,080
Speaker 1: seventh grade, eighth grade, played in high school. Then I

522
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:11,480
Speaker 1: walked onto my college football team at Northern Illinois University,

523
00:26:11,560 --> 00:26:13,760
Speaker 1: and then I ended up playing three years of arena football.

524
00:26:13,760 --> 00:26:15,600
Speaker 1: So I got paid to play football for three years.

525
00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:17,280
Speaker 1: So it was one of the I mean, it was

526
00:26:17,320 --> 00:26:19,480
Speaker 1: one of the best things that happened to my life.

527
00:26:19,760 --> 00:26:22,520
Speaker 1: For real. Why would you say that? Is it? Is

528
00:26:22,560 --> 00:26:26,880
Speaker 1: it the discipline of sports? Is it the physical activity? What?

529
00:26:26,880 --> 00:26:29,080
Speaker 1: What did you love so much about it? So in

530
00:26:29,160 --> 00:26:31,479
Speaker 1: high school, also ran track, but I hated it, Okay,

531
00:26:31,640 --> 00:26:36,399
Speaker 1: but football I loved. Football is hard. It is you

532
00:26:36,480 --> 00:26:41,520
Speaker 1: are constantly having your mind challenged every single day. You know,

533
00:26:41,560 --> 00:26:43,560
Speaker 1: people on people see it on TV and they think

534
00:26:43,560 --> 00:26:46,560
Speaker 1: it's just pushing and running. It's a game of science.

535
00:26:47,000 --> 00:26:49,480
Speaker 1: It's excess and olds. It's a it's a game of design,

536
00:26:50,000 --> 00:26:51,760
Speaker 1: you know. So you have to have a certain level

537
00:26:51,760 --> 00:26:54,800
Speaker 1: of awareness to be decent, to be good. It's a

538
00:26:54,840 --> 00:26:57,600
Speaker 1: game of knowing how to preserve your energy. It's a

539
00:26:57,640 --> 00:27:00,760
Speaker 1: game of knowing angles. Like we to have this drill

540
00:27:00,800 --> 00:27:04,160
Speaker 1: call pursuit drill, pursuit drill break it down for someone

541
00:27:04,200 --> 00:27:07,160
Speaker 1: who may not understand football. Essentially, if I'm a defender

542
00:27:07,480 --> 00:27:09,600
Speaker 1: and I'm on like the far left side and the

543
00:27:09,680 --> 00:27:13,080
Speaker 1: play goes to my right, the pursuit drill teaches you

544
00:27:13,160 --> 00:27:15,479
Speaker 1: the exact angle you take to be able to make

545
00:27:15,520 --> 00:27:18,119
Speaker 1: a tackle. You know, when you're looking at football and

546
00:27:18,119 --> 00:27:20,560
Speaker 1: you see people get tackled so quick, it's not because

547
00:27:21,440 --> 00:27:24,080
Speaker 1: they're big and fashion or strong. It's because they understand

548
00:27:24,119 --> 00:27:28,199
Speaker 1: the angle of where to be. And there's just so

549
00:27:28,320 --> 00:27:32,240
Speaker 1: many like analogies and like allegories that you can learn

550
00:27:32,240 --> 00:27:36,119
Speaker 1: from football that just carry over into your real life

551
00:27:36,640 --> 00:27:39,000
Speaker 1: and it just makes you. To me, it just makes

552
00:27:39,040 --> 00:27:41,880
Speaker 1: you mentally strong. You know, the things that I went

553
00:27:41,880 --> 00:27:44,040
Speaker 1: through and some of the things I went through in football,

554
00:27:45,359 --> 00:27:47,520
Speaker 1: I just feel like the average person would have never

555
00:27:47,560 --> 00:27:49,560
Speaker 1: went through in their life. Just like if you talk

556
00:27:49,600 --> 00:27:51,919
Speaker 1: to a person who's who's been in the Army, you know,

557
00:27:52,000 --> 00:27:54,720
Speaker 1: been in the Marines, people who have have run marathons.

558
00:27:55,119 --> 00:27:59,800
Speaker 1: When you get to a level of physical exertion where

559
00:28:00,000 --> 00:28:03,680
Speaker 1: now your exertion becomes reliant solely upon what your mind

560
00:28:03,720 --> 00:28:06,960
Speaker 1: tells you is I just feel like you gained so

561
00:28:07,160 --> 00:28:10,760
Speaker 1: much control of yourself, of your life, and so much

562
00:28:11,400 --> 00:28:14,800
Speaker 1: power and self understanding. And I just feel like football

563
00:28:15,200 --> 00:28:17,720
Speaker 1: track didn't give me that. Football gave me that for sure.

564
00:28:18,960 --> 00:28:23,240
Speaker 1: That's so interesting. And And as we're talking about going

565
00:28:23,280 --> 00:28:28,760
Speaker 1: through high school, what were you loving academically while while

566
00:28:28,800 --> 00:28:30,919
Speaker 1: you were falling in love with sports? Was there a

567
00:28:31,040 --> 00:28:34,800
Speaker 1: subject that was your favorite or or a teacher who

568
00:28:34,800 --> 00:28:36,959
Speaker 1: really stands out that you think about from high school?

569
00:28:37,520 --> 00:28:45,080
Speaker 1: Gym class m Gym class was my favorite. Um So,

570
00:28:45,160 --> 00:28:46,760
Speaker 1: my school was a really good school. I went to

571
00:28:46,800 --> 00:28:49,600
Speaker 1: Palatin High School and every year that I was there,

572
00:28:49,640 --> 00:28:53,520
Speaker 1: they won the Blue Ribbon Excellence Award, which essentially goes

573
00:28:53,560 --> 00:28:55,760
Speaker 1: to one of the top one high schools in the

574
00:28:55,880 --> 00:28:58,800
Speaker 1: United States of America. What made us so great really

575
00:28:58,840 --> 00:29:01,600
Speaker 1: wasn't our athletics. It was the academic programming. It was

576
00:29:01,640 --> 00:29:05,040
Speaker 1: the teachers there, it was the counselors, it was you know,

577
00:29:05,080 --> 00:29:07,800
Speaker 1: we had a choice. You're a freshman and sophomore year,

578
00:29:07,880 --> 00:29:11,160
Speaker 1: you do your regular you know, the regular assignments. But

579
00:29:11,240 --> 00:29:13,200
Speaker 1: then your junior and senior year, you actually have a

580
00:29:13,320 --> 00:29:16,160
Speaker 1: choice of if you want to go language, or if

581
00:29:16,160 --> 00:29:19,040
Speaker 1: you want to go arts, And so what I chose

582
00:29:19,160 --> 00:29:21,480
Speaker 1: was arts. So I got to do class I have

583
00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:23,800
Speaker 1: to do like drama, I got to do drawing, I

584
00:29:23,800 --> 00:29:26,400
Speaker 1: got to do painting, I got to do poetry. I

585
00:29:26,440 --> 00:29:28,480
Speaker 1: have to do a whole bunch of different classes in

586
00:29:28,520 --> 00:29:31,560
Speaker 1: the arts, you know. And so if you would have

587
00:29:31,560 --> 00:29:33,600
Speaker 1: went language, you would have you people who leave my

588
00:29:33,640 --> 00:29:37,000
Speaker 1: high school, they leave knowing French obviously English, and then

589
00:29:37,040 --> 00:29:39,560
Speaker 1: they leave with Spanish as well, because you get French

590
00:29:39,600 --> 00:29:42,320
Speaker 1: and Spanish for your junior and senior year, so you

591
00:29:42,400 --> 00:29:45,720
Speaker 1: leave there with two languages. So the summer of sophomore year,

592
00:29:45,840 --> 00:29:47,240
Speaker 1: they asked me what do you want to do? Do

593
00:29:47,280 --> 00:29:49,920
Speaker 1: you want to do you know the language, or do

594
00:29:49,960 --> 00:29:51,560
Speaker 1: you want to do arts. I'm like, oh, well, I'm

595
00:29:51,560 --> 00:29:54,280
Speaker 1: an artistic person. I want the arts. So you get

596
00:29:54,320 --> 00:29:57,960
Speaker 1: these acting classes, you get speech classes, drawing, Like my

597
00:29:58,000 --> 00:30:01,000
Speaker 1: favorite teacher, her name was Mislead, and she used to

598
00:30:01,080 --> 00:30:05,080
Speaker 1: let me draw. I had her first period and it

599
00:30:05,200 --> 00:30:07,520
Speaker 1: was so cool because you can just come in there.

600
00:30:07,600 --> 00:30:09,680
Speaker 1: You can it's the only class you can wear headphones in,

601
00:30:09,800 --> 00:30:12,160
Speaker 1: so you can wear your headphones, listen to music and

602
00:30:12,200 --> 00:30:15,080
Speaker 1: you just draw for an hour, just draw, and you

603
00:30:15,120 --> 00:30:18,360
Speaker 1: have a professional art teacher there and she's just teaching you.

604
00:30:18,880 --> 00:30:22,800
Speaker 1: And as long as you tried your best, you pass.

605
00:30:23,520 --> 00:30:25,800
Speaker 1: She's not gonna she's not gonna knock your art because

606
00:30:25,960 --> 00:30:29,080
Speaker 1: it doesn't fit into her perspective of what art is

607
00:30:29,080 --> 00:30:31,760
Speaker 1: supposed to be. She was so open to everyone's art.

608
00:30:31,760 --> 00:30:33,600
Speaker 1: She will give us the guideline. She would say, Hey,

609
00:30:33,720 --> 00:30:36,880
Speaker 1: for example, I remember we had to do a perspective photo.

610
00:30:37,480 --> 00:30:39,760
Speaker 1: So perspective photo we see him all the time. Is

611
00:30:39,880 --> 00:30:41,560
Speaker 1: when you see like a train track, or you see

612
00:30:41,600 --> 00:30:43,960
Speaker 1: like a freeway a street, and you see maybe a

613
00:30:44,000 --> 00:30:46,400
Speaker 1: building's buildings on the right side, and it kind of

614
00:30:46,440 --> 00:30:49,840
Speaker 1: all leads to what's called a vanishing point. And I mean,

615
00:30:49,960 --> 00:30:51,840
Speaker 1: to this day, I've never forgotten that because she was

616
00:30:51,880 --> 00:30:54,719
Speaker 1: such a good teacher. So literally, you start those photos

617
00:30:54,760 --> 00:30:57,160
Speaker 1: by drawing your vanishing point. Then you draw your horizon,

618
00:30:57,520 --> 00:30:59,400
Speaker 1: and then you build your city in and you built

619
00:30:59,440 --> 00:31:03,400
Speaker 1: the sky. And it was just an amazing experience to

620
00:31:03,440 --> 00:31:06,920
Speaker 1: be taking art class, you know. So I remember her class.

621
00:31:07,080 --> 00:31:11,200
Speaker 1: And then I had another teacher who I think his

622
00:31:11,280 --> 00:31:15,880
Speaker 1: name was Mr Milfe Milford, Mr Milford, and I mean,

623
00:31:15,880 --> 00:31:18,680
Speaker 1: this dude was amazing because he would see the potential

624
00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:20,800
Speaker 1: that people had and he would never hold you back,

625
00:31:21,360 --> 00:31:23,360
Speaker 1: like if you didn't he was you know how teachers

626
00:31:23,440 --> 00:31:24,800
Speaker 1: will call on you if you don't want to raise

627
00:31:24,840 --> 00:31:27,000
Speaker 1: your hand, Yeah, he was. He was never one of

628
00:31:27,040 --> 00:31:29,720
Speaker 1: those teachers. He would only call on you if you

629
00:31:29,760 --> 00:31:32,640
Speaker 1: wanted to be called on, and if you didn't want

630
00:31:32,640 --> 00:31:34,400
Speaker 1: to be called on, he would talk to you on

631
00:31:34,440 --> 00:31:36,200
Speaker 1: the side and he would just say, hey, what's going on.

632
00:31:36,240 --> 00:31:37,720
Speaker 1: You know, I didn't want to I didn't want to

633
00:31:37,720 --> 00:31:40,720
Speaker 1: embarrass you. You know, are you comfortable were talking? By

634
00:31:40,760 --> 00:31:43,280
Speaker 1: the end of the everyone was participating in his class.

635
00:31:43,560 --> 00:31:46,000
Speaker 1: He got the quietest people to participate because he was

636
00:31:46,040 --> 00:31:49,800
Speaker 1: such a just like such a warm thinkers, like your

637
00:31:49,800 --> 00:31:52,520
Speaker 1: grandfather that has cookies for you's got good stories. Like

638
00:31:52,800 --> 00:31:56,600
Speaker 1: he was just such a warm person. And I remember

639
00:31:56,600 --> 00:32:01,040
Speaker 1: when um, this song fifty cent came out. It was

640
00:32:01,040 --> 00:32:04,040
Speaker 1: called Wanstein. Okay. I was in high school when fifty

641
00:32:04,080 --> 00:32:07,560
Speaker 1: cent came out, and like, everyone's playing this song and

642
00:32:07,600 --> 00:32:09,440
Speaker 1: I walked into class and he goes, hey, have you

643
00:32:09,480 --> 00:32:11,880
Speaker 1: heard the new fifty cent song? And I was like, huh,

644
00:32:12,080 --> 00:32:14,600
Speaker 1: fifty who? Like I didn't. I had never heard of him,

645
00:32:14,640 --> 00:32:18,080
Speaker 1: So like my teacher introduced me the fifty cent He's like,

646
00:32:18,160 --> 00:32:19,640
Speaker 1: he's like, hey, you should put it on because I

647
00:32:19,680 --> 00:32:21,520
Speaker 1: was in the class first. He's like, you should put

648
00:32:21,520 --> 00:32:23,160
Speaker 1: it on. It's a new song, so he like put

649
00:32:23,200 --> 00:32:25,920
Speaker 1: it on. It's like it's pretty good, and I'm just like, well,

650
00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:28,960
Speaker 1: how's my teacher who's like seventy introducing me to like

651
00:32:29,040 --> 00:32:31,400
Speaker 1: rap music? Like this is? You know? So it was

652
00:32:31,440 --> 00:32:35,040
Speaker 1: so cool. So I think my teachers were you know,

653
00:32:35,200 --> 00:32:37,400
Speaker 1: and hold on, last thing about high school. I had

654
00:32:37,440 --> 00:32:41,840
Speaker 1: an administrator named Mrs Schmidt, and uh, I'm gonna send

655
00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:43,440
Speaker 1: this to it when it comes out, because she saved

656
00:32:43,440 --> 00:32:46,200
Speaker 1: my life. You know, she literally saved my life. My

657
00:32:46,240 --> 00:32:48,560
Speaker 1: freshman and sophomore year, I was actually gonna get expelled

658
00:32:48,560 --> 00:32:51,680
Speaker 1: from school because I had behavior issues. So the stuff

659
00:32:51,720 --> 00:32:53,320
Speaker 1: I mentioned to you about what was going on in

660
00:32:53,360 --> 00:32:56,040
Speaker 1: the home, it only got worse. So high school, you know,

661
00:32:56,080 --> 00:32:58,760
Speaker 1: your fourteen fifteen, your freshman sophomore year, and it got worse,

662
00:32:58,960 --> 00:33:01,320
Speaker 1: you know the abut see, I ended up running away

663
00:33:01,320 --> 00:33:04,400
Speaker 1: from home and it was really bad. It was really bad.

664
00:33:04,440 --> 00:33:06,440
Speaker 1: I hated being at home. Oh it's all good. I'm

665
00:33:06,480 --> 00:33:10,680
Speaker 1: in a good place now, you are, Yeah, and you know,

666
00:33:10,720 --> 00:33:13,560
Speaker 1: I would just go to school and I would just

667
00:33:13,600 --> 00:33:15,640
Speaker 1: act out. I would act out, I would lash out

668
00:33:15,640 --> 00:33:18,840
Speaker 1: and had behavior issues. I was fighting, I was fighting class,

669
00:33:18,880 --> 00:33:21,960
Speaker 1: I was fighting the lunch room, any anywhere I had

670
00:33:21,960 --> 00:33:26,200
Speaker 1: a chance to. And you know, that's how people, people

671
00:33:26,240 --> 00:33:29,360
Speaker 1: who have pain on them, that's how they behave. They

672
00:33:29,400 --> 00:33:31,000
Speaker 1: want to get the pain off of them, and so

673
00:33:31,040 --> 00:33:34,280
Speaker 1: they act out, you know. And for me, since my

674
00:33:34,840 --> 00:33:36,760
Speaker 1: since the emotion that I was getting a lot of

675
00:33:37,040 --> 00:33:40,320
Speaker 1: was anger, I was repeating the anger that I was

676
00:33:40,360 --> 00:33:42,280
Speaker 1: getting because I wanted to get it off of me,

677
00:33:43,160 --> 00:33:46,840
Speaker 1: and I would get in trouble. I think about it.

678
00:33:48,560 --> 00:33:52,680
Speaker 1: I think about it like a like a pressurized container.

679
00:33:53,520 --> 00:34:00,720
Speaker 1: And when people are suffering in households that are suffering,

680
00:34:01,080 --> 00:34:04,720
Speaker 1: really it's like you add more and more pressure to

681
00:34:04,760 --> 00:34:07,600
Speaker 1: that container. And when you think about like too much

682
00:34:07,600 --> 00:34:11,920
Speaker 1: pressure being in pipes, like with water, they burst, they rupture,

683
00:34:11,960 --> 00:34:14,440
Speaker 1: they spring, leaks, there's a leak in the wall. Then

684
00:34:14,440 --> 00:34:17,799
Speaker 1: there's mold growing in the wall. Like we we can

685
00:34:17,840 --> 00:34:22,120
Speaker 1: only contain so much. And so it doesn't surprise me,

686
00:34:22,760 --> 00:34:25,200
Speaker 1: and it makes me feel so much for the little

687
00:34:25,280 --> 00:34:29,239
Speaker 1: kid version of you, like all that pressure had to

688
00:34:29,280 --> 00:34:32,040
Speaker 1: come out somewhere and That's why, you know, for me,

689
00:34:32,239 --> 00:34:35,160
Speaker 1: I had too healthy coping they called coping mechanisms, which

690
00:34:35,239 --> 00:34:39,120
Speaker 1: was football, the sports and writing. You know, if I

691
00:34:39,120 --> 00:34:42,160
Speaker 1: didn't have those two things, I have no idea how

692
00:34:42,200 --> 00:34:45,000
Speaker 1: my story may have turned out. But I had two

693
00:34:45,120 --> 00:34:49,200
Speaker 1: things where I could express myself. So the problem in

694
00:34:49,320 --> 00:34:52,400
Speaker 1: my situation is that my freshman and sophomore year, I

695
00:34:52,440 --> 00:34:54,400
Speaker 1: actually was not playing football. I had to play my

696
00:34:54,480 --> 00:34:56,560
Speaker 1: junior and senior The reason I was not able to

697
00:34:56,560 --> 00:35:00,000
Speaker 1: play is because one of the times my parents divorce,

698
00:35:00,000 --> 00:35:03,879
Speaker 1: which was the summer of freshman year, I was displaced.

699
00:35:04,120 --> 00:35:08,000
Speaker 1: So when school started at last week of August, first

700
00:35:08,000 --> 00:35:11,680
Speaker 1: week in September, I didn't start school till November, right

701
00:35:11,800 --> 00:35:13,880
Speaker 1: because I was living with my grandmother while my parents

702
00:35:13,920 --> 00:35:16,360
Speaker 1: figured things out on the South Side of Chicago. So

703
00:35:16,400 --> 00:35:18,319
Speaker 1: I was living on the South Side of Chicago, and

704
00:35:18,360 --> 00:35:20,080
Speaker 1: I wasn't going to school. I could have went to

705
00:35:20,120 --> 00:35:22,640
Speaker 1: school there, but you know you've been in Chicago, I

706
00:35:22,640 --> 00:35:25,880
Speaker 1: know you had you had worked there. CPS, Chicago Public

707
00:35:25,880 --> 00:35:29,160
Speaker 1: School system, is not a good public school system. And

708
00:35:29,320 --> 00:35:32,120
Speaker 1: for a person like me who is um you know,

709
00:35:32,160 --> 00:35:35,360
Speaker 1: I was academically inclined. I did very good in school

710
00:35:35,400 --> 00:35:38,080
Speaker 1: when I tried, and for a person like me, who

711
00:35:38,120 --> 00:35:40,640
Speaker 1: was like very academically inclined, you put me in one

712
00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:43,360
Speaker 1: of the worst, one of the worst school systems in

713
00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:47,360
Speaker 1: the country. Plus I'm having behavior issues. It was it

714
00:35:47,400 --> 00:35:50,440
Speaker 1: would have been a combination for a very bad situation.

715
00:35:50,600 --> 00:35:54,200
Speaker 1: So I told especially with me growing up in the suburbs,

716
00:35:54,280 --> 00:35:57,680
Speaker 1: I told my grandmother, I said, I'm not going. I'm

717
00:35:57,680 --> 00:36:00,759
Speaker 1: not going. Um, the stuff that they're teaching I can

718
00:36:00,840 --> 00:36:02,440
Speaker 1: learn right here. All I need to do is go

719
00:36:02,480 --> 00:36:05,240
Speaker 1: to the library and I'll teach myself. So my first

720
00:36:05,520 --> 00:36:08,480
Speaker 1: four months of my high school I taught myself school

721
00:36:09,120 --> 00:36:12,680
Speaker 1: and then finally my mother and father decided that it

722
00:36:12,719 --> 00:36:14,759
Speaker 1: was best for me to move back to the suburbs

723
00:36:14,800 --> 00:36:17,600
Speaker 1: with my dad to finish my education there. I had

724
00:36:17,600 --> 00:36:19,360
Speaker 1: my friends there, had been out there, so it just

725
00:36:19,400 --> 00:36:21,359
Speaker 1: made more sense. This is one of the top one

726
00:36:21,719 --> 00:36:23,640
Speaker 1: schools in the country. It makes sense to put your

727
00:36:23,719 --> 00:36:27,120
Speaker 1: your kid there. So I moved back my freshman year

728
00:36:27,160 --> 00:36:28,800
Speaker 1: and it was just me and dad at this point.

729
00:36:29,160 --> 00:36:32,080
Speaker 1: So freshman year, my brother and sister are now gone

730
00:36:32,080 --> 00:36:34,480
Speaker 1: who I grew up with there with mom, and I'm

731
00:36:34,520 --> 00:36:37,000
Speaker 1: with dad. So that's part of the reason why I was,

732
00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:40,200
Speaker 1: so I was just acting the way I was acting

733
00:36:40,320 --> 00:36:42,759
Speaker 1: is Also none of this was explained to me, Like

734
00:36:43,000 --> 00:36:45,960
Speaker 1: there was never a compassionate conversation as a family, like hey,

735
00:36:46,000 --> 00:36:50,480
Speaker 1: we're gonna split up. It was just abrupt change, abrupt change.

736
00:36:50,600 --> 00:36:53,120
Speaker 1: Even in seventh grade when we moved, the way we

737
00:36:53,239 --> 00:36:56,040
Speaker 1: moved was my mom picked me up from school and

738
00:36:56,080 --> 00:36:58,600
Speaker 1: we moved. I had no idea we were moving, like

739
00:36:58,640 --> 00:37:00,959
Speaker 1: I never returned home, I ever got to say bye.

740
00:37:01,480 --> 00:37:04,919
Speaker 1: So it was like traumatic experience over and over and over.

741
00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:08,279
Speaker 1: And that's why I was acting out. So my sophomore year.

742
00:37:08,360 --> 00:37:10,600
Speaker 1: The reason I couldn't play football sophomore years because I

743
00:37:10,640 --> 00:37:14,160
Speaker 1: was ineligible because I missed half the year. So as

744
00:37:14,160 --> 00:37:16,280
Speaker 1: I'm acting now and i'm acting now, I go to

745
00:37:16,280 --> 00:37:19,720
Speaker 1: to Mr. Smidt, my administrator. I go to her office.

746
00:37:20,160 --> 00:37:23,480
Speaker 1: By this time, I had forty eight total suspension days

747
00:37:23,520 --> 00:37:26,960
Speaker 1: between my freshman and sophomore year, and I had a meeting.

748
00:37:26,960 --> 00:37:29,560
Speaker 1: It was Ms. Schmidt, the superintendent of the school, the

749
00:37:29,600 --> 00:37:32,560
Speaker 1: principal of the school, ME and my mother and this

750
00:37:32,800 --> 00:37:35,279
Speaker 1: I got. I got in a fight during finals and

751
00:37:35,440 --> 00:37:38,400
Speaker 1: my sophomore year, this kid called me an inward and

752
00:37:38,680 --> 00:37:43,880
Speaker 1: I follow him. So Mr smith, the superintendent, the principal,

753
00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:47,120
Speaker 1: and they said, they said to me, Sylvester, we want

754
00:37:47,120 --> 00:37:51,600
Speaker 1: to expel you from our school. You're you're smart, and

755
00:37:51,680 --> 00:37:55,040
Speaker 1: you're bright, and you have potential, but your behavior is

756
00:37:55,080 --> 00:37:59,320
Speaker 1: just unacceptable. It's completely unacceptable. You know, you're fighting every

757
00:37:59,320 --> 00:38:02,600
Speaker 1: twenty one day. As you're fighting somewhere, you know, the

758
00:38:02,640 --> 00:38:05,759
Speaker 1: guy says, why are you fighting? And I think that's

759
00:38:05,800 --> 00:38:08,359
Speaker 1: a you know, that's a pretty important question to ask

760
00:38:08,360 --> 00:38:11,640
Speaker 1: someone why. I think, any any time and I used

761
00:38:11,640 --> 00:38:14,440
Speaker 1: to send my work today, any time that we go

762
00:38:14,560 --> 00:38:17,759
Speaker 1: through these spaces where our behavior is not optimal or

763
00:38:17,760 --> 00:38:20,520
Speaker 1: our emotions are just off the wall, I think the

764
00:38:20,600 --> 00:38:22,799
Speaker 1: question of why is the most important question because it

765
00:38:22,840 --> 00:38:25,680
Speaker 1: helps you introspect, it helps you go within, it helps

766
00:38:25,680 --> 00:38:30,000
Speaker 1: you reassess. And he says why, and I said, well,

767
00:38:31,000 --> 00:38:33,719
Speaker 1: I'll tell you why, And then everything I just laid out.

768
00:38:33,880 --> 00:38:35,960
Speaker 1: I told him. I told him that I hate not

769
00:38:35,960 --> 00:38:38,600
Speaker 1: seeing my brother and sister. I says, I hate seeing

770
00:38:38,640 --> 00:38:40,480
Speaker 1: my parents argue because I used to love each other

771
00:38:40,480 --> 00:38:42,520
Speaker 1: and now they hate each other. You know, I said,

772
00:38:42,520 --> 00:38:45,319
Speaker 1: I hate being in this school where I'm called the

773
00:38:45,320 --> 00:38:48,080
Speaker 1: inn word all the time by by white kids. I

774
00:38:48,120 --> 00:38:50,280
Speaker 1: don't like it. I don't like being in this school,

775
00:38:50,760 --> 00:38:52,839
Speaker 1: and some of the black kids don't accept me because

776
00:38:52,880 --> 00:38:55,000
Speaker 1: they say that I talked proper and so I'm not

777
00:38:55,040 --> 00:38:56,799
Speaker 1: black enough. I said, I don't get it. I don't

778
00:38:56,800 --> 00:38:59,279
Speaker 1: get any of this, you know. I said, it's just

779
00:38:59,520 --> 00:39:01,200
Speaker 1: none of it exist to me. I said, I don't

780
00:39:01,239 --> 00:39:03,560
Speaker 1: like being in this school, and you guys are teaching

781
00:39:03,560 --> 00:39:06,799
Speaker 1: me things that don't make any sense at all, Like

782
00:39:06,840 --> 00:39:09,480
Speaker 1: this school is I feel like beneath me, you know.

783
00:39:09,600 --> 00:39:12,399
Speaker 1: And then I had I had a an issue with

784
00:39:13,080 --> 00:39:15,719
Speaker 1: black history. You know, Black History Month. I have an

785
00:39:15,719 --> 00:39:19,719
Speaker 1: issue with that. Why is black history not American history?

786
00:39:20,000 --> 00:39:23,239
Speaker 1: Why is black history only taught in February. Why are

787
00:39:23,239 --> 00:39:26,040
Speaker 1: they not teaching us full black history? Why are they

788
00:39:26,080 --> 00:39:29,399
Speaker 1: only talking to us about Martin Luther King? There's other

789
00:39:29,520 --> 00:39:32,960
Speaker 1: elements to black history. And if black history is so important,

790
00:39:33,200 --> 00:39:35,759
Speaker 1: why is there not a black present meaning? Why are

791
00:39:35,760 --> 00:39:37,560
Speaker 1: we not learning about what black people are doing in

792
00:39:37,560 --> 00:39:40,160
Speaker 1: the present moment? You know? And I asked him this

793
00:39:40,480 --> 00:39:42,880
Speaker 1: as as a high school student, I'm asking them these questions.

794
00:39:43,239 --> 00:39:46,440
Speaker 1: And I said, I'm having issues with the curriculum. I'm

795
00:39:46,480 --> 00:39:49,480
Speaker 1: having issues with my home, I'm having issues with peers

796
00:39:49,800 --> 00:39:51,919
Speaker 1: and that's why I'm acting this way. I'm lashing out

797
00:39:51,960 --> 00:39:57,759
Speaker 1: because of my world. And they started crying. Everyone's just

798
00:39:57,840 --> 00:40:01,239
Speaker 1: like crying, you know, They're just like, so, you know,

799
00:40:01,239 --> 00:40:04,400
Speaker 1: what do we do? How do we, you know, resolve this?

800
00:40:04,520 --> 00:40:06,640
Speaker 1: And I was like, well, I can tell you how

801
00:40:06,680 --> 00:40:09,279
Speaker 1: to resolve it because I had a solution. I said,

802
00:40:09,320 --> 00:40:11,040
Speaker 1: I've been wanting to play football the whole time i've

803
00:40:11,040 --> 00:40:12,920
Speaker 1: been here in this school, but you guys haven't allowed

804
00:40:12,960 --> 00:40:16,080
Speaker 1: me to. You told me to play on the sophomore team,

805
00:40:16,080 --> 00:40:18,000
Speaker 1: but I would be ineligible for the games. And I

806
00:40:18,000 --> 00:40:19,719
Speaker 1: didn't think that was fair, so I chose not to.

807
00:40:20,520 --> 00:40:22,600
Speaker 1: I want to play football, and I said, I've been

808
00:40:22,640 --> 00:40:24,920
Speaker 1: training my whole life to play football. This team has

809
00:40:24,920 --> 00:40:27,399
Speaker 1: a losing record. We haven't won any games since I've

810
00:40:27,400 --> 00:40:29,680
Speaker 1: been in high school, literally oh and nine every year.

811
00:40:30,520 --> 00:40:31,880
Speaker 1: And I just said it was like, you know, I

812
00:40:31,920 --> 00:40:33,719
Speaker 1: know this is cocky to say, but I can help

813
00:40:33,760 --> 00:40:36,160
Speaker 1: us win some games. Put me on the football team,

814
00:40:36,200 --> 00:40:38,319
Speaker 1: put me in the position to make a difference, and

815
00:40:38,360 --> 00:40:42,400
Speaker 1: I'll make a difference. And they were like, well, if

816
00:40:42,400 --> 00:40:44,760
Speaker 1: you're gonna be in football, you have to get good grades.

817
00:40:45,440 --> 00:40:47,879
Speaker 1: Right now. You have ces ds and fs I said,

818
00:40:47,920 --> 00:40:49,640
Speaker 1: I have ces d S and S because I don't care.

819
00:40:49,760 --> 00:40:51,600
Speaker 1: I said, I'm one of the smartest people in this school.

820
00:40:51,719 --> 00:40:53,359
Speaker 1: Put me on the football team and I'll get a's.

821
00:40:54,320 --> 00:40:57,600
Speaker 1: So they kind of just chuckled. They're just like okay.

822
00:40:58,280 --> 00:41:00,680
Speaker 1: So they were ready to expel me, but Mr Smid,

823
00:41:00,840 --> 00:41:04,560
Speaker 1: my administ administrator, she was like, no, we're not expelling him.

824
00:41:04,560 --> 00:41:07,279
Speaker 1: We're keeping him. I see I see his I see

825
00:41:07,280 --> 00:41:10,160
Speaker 1: his light, and we need to keep them. So they

826
00:41:10,239 --> 00:41:13,400
Speaker 1: kept me. So I came back a week later, finished

827
00:41:13,400 --> 00:41:16,640
Speaker 1: my finals. The next week, I started training for football.

828
00:41:17,040 --> 00:41:19,759
Speaker 1: So I got up every single morning. This is all

829
00:41:19,800 --> 00:41:22,360
Speaker 1: self imposed. I got up every single morning at five o'clock.

830
00:41:22,719 --> 00:41:25,239
Speaker 1: I run three to five miles every every day. I

831
00:41:25,360 --> 00:41:27,600
Speaker 1: run three or five miles every day. I do my

832
00:41:27,719 --> 00:41:29,960
Speaker 1: hundred push ups, I do pull ups. I do everything

833
00:41:29,960 --> 00:41:33,560
Speaker 1: I can because I wasn't lifting weights yet. So football,

834
00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:36,120
Speaker 1: so you know, in high school, you know ends around

835
00:41:36,200 --> 00:41:39,400
Speaker 1: mayor June. Football starts at the end of June. So

836
00:41:39,400 --> 00:41:41,720
Speaker 1: at the end of June you get summer campus starts.

837
00:41:42,280 --> 00:41:44,520
Speaker 1: So I go in there. I walk up to the coach,

838
00:41:44,600 --> 00:41:47,360
Speaker 1: varsity coach. Very first day. His name is Bill the Page,

839
00:41:48,160 --> 00:41:50,800
Speaker 1: and I said coachial page, I gotta tell you something,

840
00:41:51,480 --> 00:41:54,200
Speaker 1: and it goes, what's up, and I go, you know,

841
00:41:54,239 --> 00:41:57,040
Speaker 1: I know, this is my first day on the program,

842
00:41:57,160 --> 00:41:59,200
Speaker 1: and you know, I see all these people on like

843
00:41:59,360 --> 00:42:01,319
Speaker 1: the Wall of Aim and all these athletes who have

844
00:42:01,360 --> 00:42:03,319
Speaker 1: came here, and I'm just letting you know that I'm

845
00:42:03,320 --> 00:42:05,919
Speaker 1: about to make a difference. And he's like, you're gonna

846
00:42:05,920 --> 00:42:07,600
Speaker 1: make a difference. I say, yeah, I'm gonna make a

847
00:42:07,640 --> 00:42:10,040
Speaker 1: difference in this program and then the school and in

848
00:42:10,120 --> 00:42:13,359
Speaker 1: thousands of people's lives you'll see. And he goes, well,

849
00:42:13,360 --> 00:42:15,080
Speaker 1: that's kind of cocky, don't you think for someone who

850
00:42:15,080 --> 00:42:17,400
Speaker 1: hasn't done anything. And I was like, no, I'm not

851
00:42:17,440 --> 00:42:19,480
Speaker 1: talking about what I haven't done. I'm talking about the

852
00:42:19,480 --> 00:42:22,600
Speaker 1: future for what I'm about to do you'll see. And

853
00:42:22,640 --> 00:42:24,840
Speaker 1: he just looked at me like, who the hell is

854
00:42:24,880 --> 00:42:29,480
Speaker 1: this dude? You know, so from there, because I had football,

855
00:42:29,680 --> 00:42:32,160
Speaker 1: I just committed like I just I need it. And

856
00:42:32,360 --> 00:42:35,279
Speaker 1: any any person who can hear this who's like going

857
00:42:35,320 --> 00:42:37,160
Speaker 1: through some type of pain, you're going through some type

858
00:42:37,160 --> 00:42:39,919
Speaker 1: of suffrage. You don't know what you're doing in life.

859
00:42:39,920 --> 00:42:42,600
Speaker 1: You're clueless, like you need direction, like you gotta find

860
00:42:42,640 --> 00:42:45,799
Speaker 1: something you can commit to something that you can commit to,

861
00:42:45,920 --> 00:42:49,160
Speaker 1: because when you can commit, that's how you heal. You know,

862
00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:52,400
Speaker 1: you have to find something that is worth your time.

863
00:42:52,840 --> 00:42:56,040
Speaker 1: Maybe you can't do it every day, but often, you know,

864
00:42:56,160 --> 00:42:57,799
Speaker 1: and it doesn't have to pay you. It doesn't have

865
00:42:57,840 --> 00:43:00,000
Speaker 1: to give you money, but just something you can commit

866
00:43:00,040 --> 00:43:02,400
Speaker 1: it to, you know. For me, I had journaling and football,

867
00:43:02,960 --> 00:43:04,920
Speaker 1: and from there, with football, I got to get in

868
00:43:04,920 --> 00:43:06,799
Speaker 1: the weight room and I got to train. I got

869
00:43:06,840 --> 00:43:09,200
Speaker 1: to get around other people who had the same common

870
00:43:09,200 --> 00:43:12,480
Speaker 1: goal of healing themselves, you know, maybe getting to college

871
00:43:12,560 --> 00:43:15,960
Speaker 1: or whatever. But we stayed committed, you know, and it

872
00:43:16,040 --> 00:43:18,520
Speaker 1: was the football. I swear the football saved my life.

873
00:43:18,800 --> 00:43:20,400
Speaker 1: And the only reason I was able to play football

874
00:43:20,400 --> 00:43:22,400
Speaker 1: in high school because of Miss Schmidt, because she believed

875
00:43:22,400 --> 00:43:24,960
Speaker 1: in me. So I'm a fast forward because this this

876
00:43:25,040 --> 00:43:26,440
Speaker 1: is one of the best stories. I haven't been able

877
00:43:26,480 --> 00:43:29,520
Speaker 1: to tell this a long time. So my junior year,

878
00:43:29,560 --> 00:43:31,640
Speaker 1: I played a little bit, will do okay, we win

879
00:43:31,680 --> 00:43:35,120
Speaker 1: some games. My senior year, I play a lot. We

880
00:43:35,200 --> 00:43:38,840
Speaker 1: win a lot more games. And it was like a

881
00:43:38,880 --> 00:43:41,480
Speaker 1: big deal, like I made a big impact on my school.

882
00:43:41,800 --> 00:43:44,520
Speaker 1: I won this award called the MSL on Song here

883
00:43:44,680 --> 00:43:47,759
Speaker 1: on Song Hero, which was an award that goes to

884
00:43:47,880 --> 00:43:50,880
Speaker 1: the unsung person. Like you know, um, I got a

885
00:43:50,880 --> 00:43:54,359
Speaker 1: scholarship that Miss Schmidt created for me. It was called

886
00:43:55,200 --> 00:43:57,919
Speaker 1: the most improved student in the state. So they still

887
00:43:57,960 --> 00:43:59,920
Speaker 1: have that in Illinois. So every year you can win

888
00:43:59,920 --> 00:44:03,279
Speaker 1: the scholarship that she created for me. You know, my

889
00:44:03,400 --> 00:44:06,200
Speaker 1: junior and senior year, I had straight a's. My junior

890
00:44:06,239 --> 00:44:11,080
Speaker 1: senior year, perfect attendance, perfect attendance, straight a's, And you know,

891
00:44:11,120 --> 00:44:14,440
Speaker 1: it's like a success story that got turned around because

892
00:44:14,440 --> 00:44:16,840
Speaker 1: I had an opportunity that Miss Schmidt looked out for.

893
00:44:17,000 --> 00:44:18,600
Speaker 1: You know, Miss Schmidt was like, nope, I believe. I

894
00:44:18,600 --> 00:44:21,960
Speaker 1: see his light and I believe in him. And to

895
00:44:22,040 --> 00:44:24,040
Speaker 1: bring it full circle, you know, I travel around and

896
00:44:24,280 --> 00:44:26,760
Speaker 1: I do shows and I do talks, and my last

897
00:44:26,760 --> 00:44:31,520
Speaker 1: talk in Chicago, which was just past summer, then Schmidt

898
00:44:31,560 --> 00:44:33,480
Speaker 1: she came. You know, I haven't seen her since high

899
00:44:33,480 --> 00:44:35,839
Speaker 1: school and so she came and I got to give

900
00:44:35,840 --> 00:44:38,360
Speaker 1: her a hug and like we just cried, and you know,

901
00:44:38,440 --> 00:44:41,440
Speaker 1: it was one of those things where excuse me, if

902
00:44:41,440 --> 00:44:44,000
Speaker 1: it wasn't for her, I wouldn't even I wouldn't even

903
00:44:44,040 --> 00:44:46,720
Speaker 1: be here, like she she was like my saving grace

904
00:44:46,760 --> 00:44:49,080
Speaker 1: when I was going through the worst, you know, and

905
00:44:49,840 --> 00:44:51,760
Speaker 1: you know, she was just an administrator at her school.

906
00:44:51,880 --> 00:44:54,600
Speaker 1: So that's why I was so grateful to be at

907
00:44:54,600 --> 00:44:56,759
Speaker 1: that school, because if I wasn't at that school, like,

908
00:44:56,840 --> 00:44:58,319
Speaker 1: I just don't know if I would have been able

909
00:44:58,360 --> 00:45:00,560
Speaker 1: if I would have had an administrator like that who cared,

910
00:45:01,120 --> 00:45:04,800
Speaker 1: and she really cared, She really really cared. That's so cool.

911
00:45:06,239 --> 00:45:10,000
Speaker 1: I definitely have had some teachers like that in my life,

912
00:45:10,080 --> 00:45:14,400
Speaker 1: just people who saw me before I knew how to

913
00:45:14,440 --> 00:45:16,520
Speaker 1: see myself. And I think it can be such an

914
00:45:16,560 --> 00:45:22,239
Speaker 1: incredible gift to a kid. You mentioned that you went

915
00:45:22,280 --> 00:45:27,000
Speaker 1: to Northern Illinois University. Were you what were you studying there?

916
00:45:27,040 --> 00:45:30,560
Speaker 1: And you and you were playing football there as well? Right, Yeah,

917
00:45:30,600 --> 00:45:33,239
Speaker 1: so I played. I walked onto the college football team there.

918
00:45:33,320 --> 00:45:38,799
Speaker 1: Originally my major was English because I wanted to, you know,

919
00:45:38,920 --> 00:45:40,560
Speaker 1: write books and stuff. I already knew I wanted to

920
00:45:40,600 --> 00:45:43,600
Speaker 1: do that, so I wanted to write. Those classes were hard.

921
00:45:44,880 --> 00:45:47,400
Speaker 1: Those classes were hard because you're study. They make you

922
00:45:47,440 --> 00:45:50,520
Speaker 1: study like I mean, you're studying writers from the eighteen

923
00:45:50,600 --> 00:45:52,600
Speaker 1: hundreds and you're studying the way they used to write.

924
00:45:52,680 --> 00:45:55,839
Speaker 1: And you're studying like Latin and just it was just

925
00:45:56,000 --> 00:45:58,560
Speaker 1: it was honestly too much to to have the workload

926
00:45:58,680 --> 00:46:01,480
Speaker 1: of football and college uch as well as as that.

927
00:46:01,600 --> 00:46:04,520
Speaker 1: So I switched my community. I switched to communications, which

928
00:46:04,560 --> 00:46:08,000
Speaker 1: was actually smart for me. Um. I feel like I

929
00:46:08,040 --> 00:46:09,520
Speaker 1: got more out of that. I feel like that was

930
00:46:09,600 --> 00:46:11,080
Speaker 1: better for me because I got to learn a lot

931
00:46:11,120 --> 00:46:15,279
Speaker 1: about UH communication in like communication theory, communication model, how

932
00:46:15,320 --> 00:46:18,200
Speaker 1: people actually communicate, listening, you know, I got to learn

933
00:46:18,239 --> 00:46:21,040
Speaker 1: about active listening. We got to learn about actually had

934
00:46:21,080 --> 00:46:23,239
Speaker 1: a class about gender studies, so I got to learn

935
00:46:23,280 --> 00:46:27,400
Speaker 1: how different genders learn and how different genders UH listen

936
00:46:27,600 --> 00:46:30,719
Speaker 1: and talk. And it was just like a communication was

937
00:46:30,760 --> 00:46:33,000
Speaker 1: the best for me. If I would have stayed in English,

938
00:46:33,040 --> 00:46:34,560
Speaker 1: I don't even I don't even know if I would

939
00:46:34,600 --> 00:46:36,320
Speaker 1: be the writer I am now if I would have

940
00:46:36,360 --> 00:46:39,040
Speaker 1: stayed with the English. I'm glad I switched to communications

941
00:46:39,080 --> 00:46:41,560
Speaker 1: because I also got a lot of speech classes and

942
00:46:41,600 --> 00:46:44,200
Speaker 1: that helped me with going on the road and speaking public,

943
00:46:44,280 --> 00:46:46,560
Speaker 1: speaking in front of people and talking um. So I

944
00:46:46,600 --> 00:46:48,840
Speaker 1: got a lot of speech classes, and the speech classes

945
00:46:48,840 --> 00:46:50,719
Speaker 1: were fun because we never really knew what we were

946
00:46:50,760 --> 00:46:52,839
Speaker 1: doing when we came in, so we would come in

947
00:46:53,200 --> 00:46:56,279
Speaker 1: and the professor. I would say, Okay, today, you guys

948
00:46:56,280 --> 00:46:59,560
Speaker 1: work at ESPN and you're doing play by plays or

949
00:46:59,719 --> 00:47:02,520
Speaker 1: we have sometimes we have to narrate movies. So we

950
00:47:02,560 --> 00:47:05,000
Speaker 1: will watch like silent movies from like the forties and

951
00:47:05,040 --> 00:47:07,319
Speaker 1: we would narrate the characters. You know. So it was

952
00:47:07,360 --> 00:47:10,240
Speaker 1: like that was one of the best classes in college. Wow,

953
00:47:12,480 --> 00:47:17,239
Speaker 1: that's so cool. And so then what's the timeline because

954
00:47:17,239 --> 00:47:20,399
Speaker 1: I know you played professional football for a bit after that,

955
00:47:21,200 --> 00:47:23,640
Speaker 1: but yeah, so how do how do you go from

956
00:47:23,680 --> 00:47:28,920
Speaker 1: that college doing comms and football into football, but then

957
00:47:29,239 --> 00:47:31,600
Speaker 1: you've become a writer. How does how does it? How

958
00:47:31,640 --> 00:47:33,919
Speaker 1: does it line up? Okay, so I was a writer

959
00:47:34,000 --> 00:47:36,520
Speaker 1: the whole time, so I keep my notebooks. I'm writing

960
00:47:36,520 --> 00:47:39,719
Speaker 1: the whole time. I'm writing poems, I'm writing stories. I'm

961
00:47:39,719 --> 00:47:42,120
Speaker 1: writing love letters to my girlfriend, the girl I dated

962
00:47:42,120 --> 00:47:44,719
Speaker 1: in college. We dated for like five years, three years

963
00:47:44,719 --> 00:47:46,719
Speaker 1: if you ask her, but five to me, you know,

964
00:47:46,760 --> 00:47:48,680
Speaker 1: because it took me a little longer to get over there.

965
00:47:49,560 --> 00:47:52,880
Speaker 1: She was done in three. So uh so you know,

966
00:47:52,920 --> 00:47:55,319
Speaker 1: we're like, I'm writing love letters and you know, I'm

967
00:47:55,360 --> 00:47:58,320
Speaker 1: just I'm writing the whole time, but really just focusing

968
00:47:58,360 --> 00:48:01,160
Speaker 1: on you know, communication and sport. So what ended up

969
00:48:01,160 --> 00:48:05,160
Speaker 1: happening was I actually got dismissed from the university. I

970
00:48:05,239 --> 00:48:09,360
Speaker 1: was academically dismissed by one, I mean by one little

971
00:48:09,360 --> 00:48:11,439
Speaker 1: point of a grade. It was it was a very

972
00:48:11,440 --> 00:48:14,440
Speaker 1: hard class that really it did me in, you know. Um,

973
00:48:14,480 --> 00:48:16,960
Speaker 1: and so I got dismissed from the university. That ended

974
00:48:17,040 --> 00:48:19,879
Speaker 1: up dismissing me from you know, the football program, because

975
00:48:19,880 --> 00:48:22,600
Speaker 1: you do have to be a student to play football,

976
00:48:23,000 --> 00:48:26,600
Speaker 1: right so um, So I ended up just rolling at

977
00:48:26,600 --> 00:48:31,480
Speaker 1: the community college the the next semester to finish my

978
00:48:31,520 --> 00:48:34,880
Speaker 1: associates degree and then go back to the college. So

979
00:48:34,880 --> 00:48:36,960
Speaker 1: I ended up doing that. I finished Associates of Arts

980
00:48:36,960 --> 00:48:38,839
Speaker 1: and then I go back to the college. But when

981
00:48:38,880 --> 00:48:41,520
Speaker 1: I go back to the college, by this time I

982
00:48:41,560 --> 00:48:43,600
Speaker 1: had new coaches, So the coaches who brought me in

983
00:48:43,680 --> 00:48:46,840
Speaker 1: they were gone. So just getting back on the football program,

984
00:48:46,880 --> 00:48:49,120
Speaker 1: it just it felt like it would have just been

985
00:48:49,160 --> 00:48:52,360
Speaker 1: too much. Um. So I just made peace with it.

986
00:48:52,400 --> 00:48:54,000
Speaker 1: I said, you know, I'm just gonna be done with

987
00:48:54,440 --> 00:48:56,200
Speaker 1: um football, I'm just gonna be done with it. I'll

988
00:48:56,239 --> 00:48:58,640
Speaker 1: just be a student. I like being a student at

989
00:48:58,640 --> 00:49:00,600
Speaker 1: this college. I had some good friends, you know, I

990
00:49:00,640 --> 00:49:02,480
Speaker 1: had a girlfriend that I liked, so it was good.

991
00:49:03,360 --> 00:49:06,120
Speaker 1: And what ended up happening was just through the power

992
00:49:06,160 --> 00:49:08,759
Speaker 1: of network. I got a phone call and someone was like, Hey,

993
00:49:08,800 --> 00:49:11,279
Speaker 1: there's this arena football team about fifty miles from you

994
00:49:11,320 --> 00:49:14,640
Speaker 1: in a place called Rockford, Illinois called the Rockford Raptors.

995
00:49:14,840 --> 00:49:17,240
Speaker 1: And you know, I know, they're having like a tryout.

996
00:49:17,280 --> 00:49:19,440
Speaker 1: I know the coach you should just go. So I

997
00:49:19,480 --> 00:49:22,360
Speaker 1: was like, okay, cool, So I went to the tryout.

998
00:49:22,400 --> 00:49:25,440
Speaker 1: They picked me up. They signed me um right then

999
00:49:25,480 --> 00:49:28,040
Speaker 1: and there. So like, I'm in college, but I'm playing

1000
00:49:28,200 --> 00:49:30,960
Speaker 1: arena football and playing pro football. You make like three

1001
00:49:31,160 --> 00:49:34,000
Speaker 1: d and twenty bucks a game. The games are every Saturday,

1002
00:49:34,040 --> 00:49:36,879
Speaker 1: I believe. So to me, I'm like, oh, this is great.

1003
00:49:36,920 --> 00:49:39,520
Speaker 1: I would be in my junior year of you know,

1004
00:49:39,680 --> 00:49:43,200
Speaker 1: college football, but I'm playing arena football making a little

1005
00:49:43,200 --> 00:49:45,759
Speaker 1: bit of money. So you know, it worked out. So

1006
00:49:45,840 --> 00:49:50,800
Speaker 1: I did that my for three years. And what happened

1007
00:49:50,800 --> 00:49:54,360
Speaker 1: on the last year. I was in Billings, Montana, and

1008
00:49:54,680 --> 00:49:56,680
Speaker 1: I got cut from the team. This is my third team.

1009
00:49:56,680 --> 00:49:59,239
Speaker 1: I got cut from the team. My cousin Tara, she

1010
00:49:59,360 --> 00:50:01,960
Speaker 1: gave me forty dollars to get home on a Greyhound.

1011
00:50:02,440 --> 00:50:05,360
Speaker 1: So I wrote the Greyhound from Billings, Montana to Chicago,

1012
00:50:06,360 --> 00:50:11,000
Speaker 1: and it's like a twenty eight hour, thirty hour ride

1013
00:50:11,880 --> 00:50:15,120
Speaker 1: and it was tight. Man, those seats were small. My

1014
00:50:15,200 --> 00:50:18,799
Speaker 1: neck hurt, my back hurt, my butt hurt. But the

1015
00:50:18,840 --> 00:50:20,960
Speaker 1: whole time on the ride, I'm just thinking, like, all right,

1016
00:50:21,000 --> 00:50:23,120
Speaker 1: what do I want to do, because you know, at

1017
00:50:23,120 --> 00:50:26,600
Speaker 1: this point, I was done with college. I'm mentally done

1018
00:50:26,600 --> 00:50:29,759
Speaker 1: with football. It's time for me to kind of transition

1019
00:50:29,800 --> 00:50:31,759
Speaker 1: into like the next phase of my life, you know.

1020
00:50:33,080 --> 00:50:37,560
Speaker 1: And I got a job as a cook. I got

1021
00:50:37,640 --> 00:50:39,080
Speaker 1: a job. I was able to get a job as

1022
00:50:39,120 --> 00:50:41,360
Speaker 1: a cook. My dad was a chef, so I always

1023
00:50:41,400 --> 00:50:43,960
Speaker 1: knew like the culinary instinct was inside of me. So

1024
00:50:44,600 --> 00:50:46,000
Speaker 1: I just said, man, I just need to get some

1025
00:50:46,080 --> 00:50:48,600
Speaker 1: type of job. So I went on like Craigslist and

1026
00:50:48,920 --> 00:50:51,879
Speaker 1: I'm just looking for jobs. Ended up getting a job

1027
00:50:51,920 --> 00:50:57,480
Speaker 1: as a cook. And I'm still writing, but it's not

1028
00:50:57,880 --> 00:50:59,960
Speaker 1: a primary thing right now. I'm just thinking about survive,

1029
00:51:01,239 --> 00:51:03,800
Speaker 1: you know. I'm just trying to survive. So the years

1030
00:51:03,800 --> 00:51:08,000
Speaker 1: two thousand nine and we rolled to summer two thousand ten,

1031
00:51:08,880 --> 00:51:13,000
Speaker 1: my best friend he gets a job working at Verizon

1032
00:51:14,000 --> 00:51:18,080
Speaker 1: and he goes, hey, I'm working at Verizon. I'm doing sales,

1033
00:51:18,200 --> 00:51:20,839
Speaker 1: I'm making these commission checks. I'm killing it. You gotta

1034
00:51:20,840 --> 00:51:24,000
Speaker 1: get a job here. So I'm like, okay, I'm ana cook.

1035
00:51:24,120 --> 00:51:30,399
Speaker 1: I'm not killing anything. Like, I'll take I'll apply whatever. So, yeah,

1036
00:51:30,480 --> 00:51:32,440
Speaker 1: whatever I need to do. So he's like, okay, here,

1037
00:51:32,440 --> 00:51:34,560
Speaker 1: I'm gonna send you the link for the job. Apply

1038
00:51:34,680 --> 00:51:38,560
Speaker 1: for the job. So I'm living in Rockford, Illinois, Okay,

1039
00:51:38,960 --> 00:51:41,359
Speaker 1: and he sends me a link for the job, which

1040
00:51:41,400 --> 00:51:47,600
Speaker 1: is in Wheaton, Illinois. Okay, sixty miles away. Wow, Wheaton. Okay.

1041
00:51:48,040 --> 00:51:51,200
Speaker 1: So but hey, I mean, when you're making twenty bucks

1042
00:51:51,200 --> 00:51:54,319
Speaker 1: a day and your friend is telling you, hey, I

1043
00:51:54,400 --> 00:51:58,000
Speaker 1: just made five thousand as a commission you're you're You're like, oh, yeah,

1044
00:51:58,200 --> 00:52:02,319
Speaker 1: I have to apply. What's the worst thing. So I

1045
00:52:02,360 --> 00:52:05,279
Speaker 1: put together like the best resume. This is where my

1046
00:52:05,320 --> 00:52:08,120
Speaker 1: writing skills really helped me. So I put together the

1047
00:52:08,160 --> 00:52:10,920
Speaker 1: best resume I could put together. But at the time,

1048
00:52:11,040 --> 00:52:14,760
Speaker 1: I'm only, you know, a fresh college student who played football.

1049
00:52:14,880 --> 00:52:18,799
Speaker 1: Really that's really like my only professional experience. So I

1050
00:52:18,920 --> 00:52:21,680
Speaker 1: just write it the best that I could. Because resumes

1051
00:52:21,800 --> 00:52:24,359
Speaker 1: is really about how you frame it. So I as

1052
00:52:24,400 --> 00:52:26,279
Speaker 1: a writer, I'm like, man, I can do this. So

1053
00:52:27,840 --> 00:52:32,839
Speaker 1: they called me, and they called me. A guy named

1054
00:52:32,880 --> 00:52:35,719
Speaker 1: Jeremy calls me and he goes he has such a deep,

1055
00:52:35,760 --> 00:52:39,640
Speaker 1: like raspy voice. He's like, yeah, I'm looking to speak

1056
00:52:39,680 --> 00:52:43,239
Speaker 1: to us. So Lester mcnuh the third and I'm like, yeah, yeah,

1057
00:52:43,239 --> 00:52:44,560
Speaker 1: this is me. This is me. Yeah, this is me.

1058
00:52:44,600 --> 00:52:46,799
Speaker 1: You're not put my professional voice on. Yeah this is me. Yeah,

1059
00:52:46,840 --> 00:52:50,280
Speaker 1: it's me. And uh yeah, this is this is Jeremy Wallace.

1060
00:52:50,280 --> 00:52:54,319
Speaker 1: I'm calling from a Verizon wireless So, yeah, we wanna

1061
00:52:54,400 --> 00:52:56,880
Speaker 1: we want to bring you in for an interview. So

1062
00:52:57,080 --> 00:52:59,160
Speaker 1: I mute the phone. I just started screaming. I'm like,

1063
00:52:59,200 --> 00:53:01,839
Speaker 1: oh yeah, yeah, okay, I don't even have the job.

1064
00:53:01,880 --> 00:53:04,440
Speaker 1: I just got the interview. So I unneat the phone

1065
00:53:04,719 --> 00:53:06,719
Speaker 1: and he's like, excuse me, are you there? Are you there?

1066
00:53:06,719 --> 00:53:08,759
Speaker 1: I'm like, yeah, yeah, I'm here. I'm here. Yeah, I'll

1067
00:53:08,760 --> 00:53:10,120
Speaker 1: come in for an interview when you need me to

1068
00:53:10,160 --> 00:53:12,520
Speaker 1: come in. He's like, how about tomorrow. So I go

1069
00:53:12,560 --> 00:53:16,680
Speaker 1: in for the interview and the manager was Jennifer Celeski

1070
00:53:16,719 --> 00:53:19,120
Speaker 1: and Jeremy Wills. So I get in there and they

1071
00:53:19,120 --> 00:53:24,560
Speaker 1: are just two mean looking people. Jeremy's like six four,

1072
00:53:25,040 --> 00:53:28,720
Speaker 1: big dude. Uh, they're both brunette, both were in black,

1073
00:53:28,920 --> 00:53:30,960
Speaker 1: both were in their black names. I mean, they're just

1074
00:53:31,160 --> 00:53:34,759
Speaker 1: mean looking. They don't smile, they're just looking at me.

1075
00:53:35,160 --> 00:53:38,160
Speaker 1: And you know, we do the whole interview and we

1076
00:53:38,239 --> 00:53:40,319
Speaker 1: get to the end and they go, so, do you

1077
00:53:40,360 --> 00:53:43,880
Speaker 1: have anything else to say? And I say, yeah, you know,

1078
00:53:43,920 --> 00:53:46,320
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be honest with you. You guys might interview

1079
00:53:46,360 --> 00:53:50,080
Speaker 1: some people who are probably more qualified than me, who

1080
00:53:50,239 --> 00:53:52,799
Speaker 1: have better resumes than me, who are probably even better

1081
00:53:52,800 --> 00:53:54,560
Speaker 1: looking than me. You know, I try to make them laugh, like,

1082
00:53:54,560 --> 00:53:57,560
Speaker 1: who are probably even better looking than me? But no

1083
00:53:57,640 --> 00:54:00,000
Speaker 1: one is gonna come in here, and it's gonna work

1084
00:54:00,040 --> 00:54:02,520
Speaker 1: as hard as I'm gonna work. I'm gonna dedicate myself

1085
00:54:02,560 --> 00:54:05,160
Speaker 1: to this job. Right now. All I have going for

1086
00:54:05,239 --> 00:54:08,200
Speaker 1: me is a cook. I'm a cook and I'm barely

1087
00:54:08,200 --> 00:54:10,440
Speaker 1: making it. But I go in there every day and

1088
00:54:10,480 --> 00:54:13,279
Speaker 1: I burned myself just so I could survive. If you

1089
00:54:13,320 --> 00:54:15,160
Speaker 1: give me an opportunity to come in here, I'm gonna

1090
00:54:15,160 --> 00:54:18,160
Speaker 1: be your number one salesperson. It may not happen right away,

1091
00:54:18,200 --> 00:54:21,600
Speaker 1: but I'm going to become that so you won't waste

1092
00:54:21,640 --> 00:54:24,600
Speaker 1: taking a chance on me. And they were like, okay,

1093
00:54:24,640 --> 00:54:26,680
Speaker 1: all right, So they sent me on my way. Like

1094
00:54:26,760 --> 00:54:29,480
Speaker 1: three days later, HR called, you know in her name

1095
00:54:29,520 --> 00:54:31,800
Speaker 1: with Cheryl. She's like, okay, this is Cheryl Pickered with

1096
00:54:31,840 --> 00:54:34,520
Speaker 1: the Verizon Wireless. You know, we want to extend you

1097
00:54:34,560 --> 00:54:37,319
Speaker 1: an offer to work at Verizon. And I like just

1098
00:54:37,400 --> 00:54:39,640
Speaker 1: threw the phone across the room. I'm like, I'm just

1099
00:54:39,680 --> 00:54:42,520
Speaker 1: like screaming. This is like my first real job. The

1100
00:54:42,760 --> 00:54:46,319
Speaker 1: salary was twenty seven thousand dollars plus commission. So I'm

1101
00:54:46,400 --> 00:54:50,640
Speaker 1: just like yes, you know. And it felt like to me,

1102
00:54:50,760 --> 00:54:53,120
Speaker 1: it felt like that moment in high school. One. I

1103
00:54:53,160 --> 00:54:54,920
Speaker 1: had to tell them like, look, if you take a

1104
00:54:55,000 --> 00:54:57,640
Speaker 1: chance for me, I'm gonna come through for you, you you know.

1105
00:54:57,719 --> 00:54:59,640
Speaker 1: And I told those manners that you know, hey, if

1106
00:54:59,640 --> 00:55:01,799
Speaker 1: you guys take a chance on me, I'm gonna come

1107
00:55:01,800 --> 00:55:04,279
Speaker 1: through for you, Like I'm going to be your best salesperson.

1108
00:55:04,320 --> 00:55:06,680
Speaker 1: You just like you just gotta take a chance on me,

1109
00:55:06,760 --> 00:55:09,920
Speaker 1: you know. And they did. Jane and Jeremy they hired me.

1110
00:55:10,400 --> 00:55:12,680
Speaker 1: I was their best salesperson, you know. It was me

1111
00:55:12,680 --> 00:55:14,480
Speaker 1: and a guy named Michael George. We were the top

1112
00:55:14,520 --> 00:55:17,560
Speaker 1: two sales people for two years, number one and two

1113
00:55:17,640 --> 00:55:21,080
Speaker 1: for two years and you know, if they would have

1114
00:55:21,120 --> 00:55:22,600
Speaker 1: never took a chance on me, I would have never

1115
00:55:22,640 --> 00:55:25,440
Speaker 1: became a writer because I needed that job. Like Verizon

1116
00:55:25,520 --> 00:55:27,279
Speaker 1: was a great company to work for because they got

1117
00:55:27,320 --> 00:55:29,640
Speaker 1: me in. They got me in leadership training. They wanted

1118
00:55:29,680 --> 00:55:31,080
Speaker 1: me to be a manager, so they got me a

1119
00:55:31,080 --> 00:55:34,040
Speaker 1: management training. They started teaching me. Yeah, they got me

1120
00:55:34,040 --> 00:55:37,359
Speaker 1: in this program called Midwest Mobility, And what it was

1121
00:55:37,360 --> 00:55:41,719
Speaker 1: was it was sixty people in the Midwest, so Illinois, Wisconsin.

1122
00:55:42,120 --> 00:55:44,480
Speaker 1: It was the sixty people who had the most potential,

1123
00:55:44,880 --> 00:55:47,680
Speaker 1: you know, to become district managers down the road, which

1124
00:55:47,719 --> 00:55:50,560
Speaker 1: was a coveted position. So their teaching, I mean, you're

1125
00:55:50,719 --> 00:55:54,120
Speaker 1: it's it's a you had like business acumen, you had scheduling,

1126
00:55:54,440 --> 00:55:58,200
Speaker 1: you had managing conflicts. So I'm getting all this training

1127
00:55:58,280 --> 00:56:01,400
Speaker 1: and development on the job while being a top performer,

1128
00:56:01,880 --> 00:56:04,560
Speaker 1: you know. And I just I'm so grateful that I

1129
00:56:04,600 --> 00:56:07,399
Speaker 1: was able to get this job, you know, because now

1130
00:56:07,920 --> 00:56:10,239
Speaker 1: that's when I started like saving my emergency fund, I

1131
00:56:10,239 --> 00:56:12,600
Speaker 1: started paying back my student loans. I started to get

1132
00:56:12,800 --> 00:56:15,879
Speaker 1: financially okay, you know, whereas you're a chef, I wasn't

1133
00:56:15,880 --> 00:56:18,600
Speaker 1: making enough, you know too, And I wasn't even a chef.

1134
00:56:18,640 --> 00:56:20,400
Speaker 1: I was a cook, so I wasn't making enough to

1135
00:56:20,440 --> 00:56:23,440
Speaker 1: really do anything. I was just surviving. Now I'm in

1136
00:56:23,440 --> 00:56:25,479
Speaker 1: a position where I'm actually I'm living on my own,

1137
00:56:25,520 --> 00:56:27,920
Speaker 1: I got a car, I'm saving a little bit of money.

1138
00:56:28,480 --> 00:56:32,000
Speaker 1: And it was just I'm just so grateful for that opportunity,

1139
00:56:32,080 --> 00:56:35,120
Speaker 1: you know, to be able to work there with them.

1140
00:56:35,160 --> 00:56:38,640
Speaker 1: So because you started to have a cushion and some space,

1141
00:56:39,560 --> 00:56:42,120
Speaker 1: is that when you were working at that company, Is

1142
00:56:42,160 --> 00:56:45,359
Speaker 1: that when you were able to start thinking about your

1143
00:56:45,400 --> 00:56:48,600
Speaker 1: first book? Absolutely? That's If I didn't work there, I

1144
00:56:48,600 --> 00:56:52,000
Speaker 1: wouldn't have been able to see when Corona happened. I

1145
00:56:52,000 --> 00:56:54,520
Speaker 1: saw a lot of people tweeting, Oh, where you're gonna

1146
00:56:54,520 --> 00:56:56,799
Speaker 1: be at home? We should just write a book. Well,

1147
00:56:56,880 --> 00:56:59,040
Speaker 1: as a person who's written eight books, this is the

1148
00:56:59,040 --> 00:57:01,040
Speaker 1: worst time to write a book. You don't want to

1149
00:57:01,080 --> 00:57:02,800
Speaker 1: in my opinion, you don't want to write a book

1150
00:57:02,840 --> 00:57:05,800
Speaker 1: when you're in survival mode, when you're in desperation mode.

1151
00:57:06,239 --> 00:57:08,560
Speaker 1: That's that to me, is just not where the best

1152
00:57:08,600 --> 00:57:11,440
Speaker 1: inspiration and creativity is going to come from. And my

1153
00:57:11,640 --> 00:57:14,319
Speaker 1: and just in my opinion, you know, for me, I

1154
00:57:14,360 --> 00:57:18,400
Speaker 1: was able to pay my bills and have have Uh,

1155
00:57:18,480 --> 00:57:20,880
Speaker 1: you know, money for like Sunday Funday type stuff, things

1156
00:57:20,920 --> 00:57:22,800
Speaker 1: I had never done before. You know, I was able

1157
00:57:22,800 --> 00:57:28,400
Speaker 1: to get brunched. That comfort was what enabled me to

1158
00:57:28,440 --> 00:57:32,240
Speaker 1: start rewriting again, because when I was in survival mode,

1159
00:57:32,280 --> 00:57:35,360
Speaker 1: I wasn't thinking you're only thinking about art as a

1160
00:57:36,680 --> 00:57:40,280
Speaker 1: coping thing, you know. But when I when I got

1161
00:57:40,320 --> 00:57:44,280
Speaker 1: the job, now, art wasn't coping. It was just let

1162
00:57:44,280 --> 00:57:48,200
Speaker 1: me express freely. So you're creating from two different places.

1163
00:57:49,000 --> 00:57:51,200
Speaker 1: If you have to, I mean, you're you're you're an actress.

1164
00:57:51,480 --> 00:57:53,120
Speaker 1: So if you have to go for a job now

1165
00:57:53,200 --> 00:57:55,720
Speaker 1: at this point in your career because you need a sandwich,

1166
00:57:56,320 --> 00:57:58,920
Speaker 1: or you're doing it because you're genuinely inspired by the

1167
00:57:59,040 --> 00:58:01,720
Speaker 1: role or your action about working with the director, they're

1168
00:58:01,760 --> 00:58:05,120
Speaker 1: gonna your performances are going to be drastically different. What

1169
00:58:05,200 --> 00:58:08,680
Speaker 1: you said just hits me so hard, because real expression

1170
00:58:08,840 --> 00:58:14,080
Speaker 1: requires an energy of freedom in your body. Art is

1171
00:58:14,840 --> 00:58:20,520
Speaker 1: free expression. Art is flow, and and when you're in

1172
00:58:20,560 --> 00:58:24,000
Speaker 1: a state of anxiety or primal fear, it's really hard

1173
00:58:24,080 --> 00:58:27,640
Speaker 1: to flow. So that makes that makes a lot of sense.

1174
00:58:29,880 --> 00:58:32,840
Speaker 1: What was it like to begin that process? What was

1175
00:58:32,880 --> 00:58:36,080
Speaker 1: it like to begin sharing? Because I know that you know,

1176
00:58:36,120 --> 00:58:38,520
Speaker 1: you started getting It's like one of my favorite stories

1177
00:58:38,560 --> 00:58:41,120
Speaker 1: is that you started getting reactions to your writing and

1178
00:58:41,200 --> 00:58:43,560
Speaker 1: people were saying to you like, oh, what book is

1179
00:58:43,600 --> 00:58:45,960
Speaker 1: this from? Who wrote this? And you're like, no, no,

1180
00:58:46,400 --> 00:58:49,440
Speaker 1: I've I've wrote it. It's my It's going to be

1181
00:58:49,480 --> 00:58:52,560
Speaker 1: in my book. So what what was going on at

1182
00:58:52,600 --> 00:58:56,440
Speaker 1: the time? How did how did that kind of begin?

1183
00:58:57,520 --> 00:59:00,480
Speaker 1: So just to summarize the job tent ten to two

1184
00:59:00,520 --> 00:59:02,400
Speaker 1: thousand and twelve, I was I was at at my

1185
00:59:02,440 --> 00:59:05,720
Speaker 1: god at my job and top performer, top one percent

1186
00:59:05,760 --> 00:59:08,600
Speaker 1: in company, and sales I was working in sales. And

1187
00:59:09,840 --> 00:59:13,640
Speaker 1: sales is such an interesting Every company have sales. You know,

1188
00:59:13,720 --> 00:59:15,520
Speaker 1: it doesn't matter what you do. You have a sales

1189
00:59:15,560 --> 00:59:18,440
Speaker 1: component to your job. If you don't, you won't have

1190
00:59:18,480 --> 00:59:20,720
Speaker 1: a job. You won't. You know, if you're trying to

1191
00:59:20,760 --> 00:59:22,560
Speaker 1: put a movie out, you need people to sell it.

1192
00:59:22,600 --> 00:59:25,880
Speaker 1: You need people to market it. You know. Um In

1193
00:59:26,280 --> 00:59:28,840
Speaker 1: learning sales, I feel like it's the number one thing

1194
00:59:29,200 --> 00:59:31,640
Speaker 1: that artists need to do. You need to learn how

1195
00:59:31,680 --> 00:59:33,360
Speaker 1: to sell yourself. You need to learn how to sell

1196
00:59:33,400 --> 00:59:36,560
Speaker 1: your product, your merchandise, whatever it is you need to learn.

1197
00:59:36,640 --> 00:59:41,800
Speaker 1: Sales and sales is psychology. It is the psychology of

1198
00:59:41,840 --> 00:59:44,680
Speaker 1: what triggers people to buy or not to buy, to

1199
00:59:44,840 --> 00:59:47,000
Speaker 1: do or not to do it. It's only psychology. That

1200
00:59:47,160 --> 00:59:50,080
Speaker 1: is only what sales is. So I got to work

1201
00:59:50,120 --> 00:59:53,800
Speaker 1: at the time when the iPhone was first being launched. Now,

1202
00:59:53,840 --> 00:59:56,080
Speaker 1: the iPhone is one of the first, at least in

1203
00:59:56,120 --> 00:59:58,960
Speaker 1: my lifetime. It's one of the first items that I

1204
00:59:58,960 --> 01:00:01,720
Speaker 1: could think of that when quote unquote viral. Other other

1205
01:00:01,720 --> 01:00:03,720
Speaker 1: than that I could think of like the Tickle me

1206
01:00:03,800 --> 01:00:07,200
Speaker 1: Elmo dolls back in the nineties, like that was a

1207
01:00:07,280 --> 01:00:11,120
Speaker 1: viral product. The iPhones were like a viral product. So

1208
01:00:11,240 --> 01:00:15,120
Speaker 1: I'm working during the viral product launches of the iPhones

1209
01:00:15,160 --> 01:00:18,200
Speaker 1: and I'm selling the phones. So most people just do

1210
01:00:18,240 --> 01:00:20,040
Speaker 1: the job. They just collect the money and go home.

1211
01:00:20,080 --> 01:00:22,440
Speaker 1: But I'm I'm literally I would on my break, I

1212
01:00:22,440 --> 01:00:26,080
Speaker 1: would take notes about the psychology of the people, you know,

1213
01:00:26,120 --> 01:00:28,000
Speaker 1: and I would just be paying attention to everything. And

1214
01:00:28,000 --> 01:00:32,280
Speaker 1: I'm taking all these notes at work, and I started

1215
01:00:32,280 --> 01:00:34,800
Speaker 1: writing a book about how to be the most successful

1216
01:00:34,920 --> 01:00:37,360
Speaker 1: self person. And what I was gonna do was I

1217
01:00:37,400 --> 01:00:39,120
Speaker 1: was gonna sell it like I was gonna give it

1218
01:00:39,160 --> 01:00:42,320
Speaker 1: to my what's his name, His name is Chris Dietrich.

1219
01:00:42,360 --> 01:00:44,560
Speaker 1: He was the director of sales. I was gonna give

1220
01:00:44,600 --> 01:00:46,160
Speaker 1: it to him to see if he could sell it

1221
01:00:46,480 --> 01:00:48,920
Speaker 1: inside the company. That was my goal. I was like, hey,

1222
01:00:49,240 --> 01:00:51,040
Speaker 1: I'm top one percent in the company. I might as

1223
01:00:51,040 --> 01:00:53,680
Speaker 1: well tell everybody what I'm doing. Too. Was working, so

1224
01:00:53,800 --> 01:00:55,720
Speaker 1: I'm I started writing this book. I'm gonna give it

1225
01:00:55,760 --> 01:00:57,800
Speaker 1: to my director so he could sell it within the company.

1226
01:00:57,840 --> 01:01:00,320
Speaker 1: This was my mindset. So I just start working on

1227
01:01:00,360 --> 01:01:02,360
Speaker 1: the book. And then I'm at work and like I

1228
01:01:02,360 --> 01:01:04,640
Speaker 1: would just I would find myself taking my phone because

1229
01:01:04,680 --> 01:01:07,480
Speaker 1: i was writing the book on my phone, so I'm

1230
01:01:07,520 --> 01:01:10,280
Speaker 1: writing in my notes at work, I find myself going

1231
01:01:10,320 --> 01:01:13,200
Speaker 1: to the bathroom like ten eleven twelve bathroom breaks. No

1232
01:01:13,240 --> 01:01:15,320
Speaker 1: one actually uses the bathroom that much. I would just

1233
01:01:15,360 --> 01:01:17,360
Speaker 1: going there, locked the door and pull out my phone

1234
01:01:17,400 --> 01:01:19,960
Speaker 1: and start working on my book. So when I get

1235
01:01:19,960 --> 01:01:22,520
Speaker 1: to this obsessive point where I'm like working on my book,

1236
01:01:23,040 --> 01:01:25,960
Speaker 1: that's when I noticed like a shift in my happiness

1237
01:01:26,000 --> 01:01:28,920
Speaker 1: at work. That's when my because I was super happy

1238
01:01:28,920 --> 01:01:30,760
Speaker 1: at my job, then I started to not be happy

1239
01:01:31,080 --> 01:01:33,280
Speaker 1: because now my job is taking away from me working

1240
01:01:33,280 --> 01:01:36,560
Speaker 1: on my book. So the shift happened where I'm like

1241
01:01:36,560 --> 01:01:40,360
Speaker 1: I just started leaning towards my creativity. So the final

1242
01:01:40,400 --> 01:01:43,800
Speaker 1: straw for me was my best friend, my brother. You know,

1243
01:01:43,880 --> 01:01:45,600
Speaker 1: I was the best man at his wedding, you know,

1244
01:01:45,760 --> 01:01:49,400
Speaker 1: the guyfather his children. He came over my house one

1245
01:01:49,480 --> 01:01:52,200
Speaker 1: day and the stack of notebooks that I told you

1246
01:01:52,240 --> 01:01:54,720
Speaker 1: I've been writing in my whole life. He saw them.

1247
01:01:54,920 --> 01:01:56,600
Speaker 1: No one ever saw them. Me and him a roommates

1248
01:01:56,640 --> 01:01:59,160
Speaker 1: in college for four years, and he never saw them.

1249
01:01:59,320 --> 01:02:02,120
Speaker 1: So he saw these notebooks and he's like, hey, what's

1250
01:02:02,160 --> 01:02:05,000
Speaker 1: what are these notebooks? Just for Verizon? And you know,

1251
01:02:05,040 --> 01:02:07,240
Speaker 1: I'm hey, get away from there, get away from there. Don't, don't, don't,

1252
01:02:07,240 --> 01:02:09,760
Speaker 1: don't look at that stuff. Put that stuff down. He's like, well,

1253
01:02:09,760 --> 01:02:11,920
Speaker 1: what is it? And I'm like, man, it's just you know,

1254
01:02:12,120 --> 01:02:14,760
Speaker 1: some stuff I've been working on. So it's literally my

1255
01:02:15,000 --> 01:02:17,640
Speaker 1: entire life work since I was twelve. It's every single

1256
01:02:17,680 --> 01:02:20,640
Speaker 1: notebook I ever had. I kept them all. So he's

1257
01:02:20,680 --> 01:02:24,240
Speaker 1: looking and he's just like and he's a stoic. He's

1258
01:02:24,320 --> 01:02:28,040
Speaker 1: very stoic. He's very calm, and he's just like, dude,

1259
01:02:28,080 --> 01:02:31,560
Speaker 1: this is incredible, Like you wrote all of this and say, yeah,

1260
01:02:32,120 --> 01:02:35,040
Speaker 1: this is incredible. He's like, what are you doing at Verizon?

1261
01:02:35,400 --> 01:02:36,600
Speaker 1: It's like, what do you mean I'm doing out doing

1262
01:02:36,600 --> 01:02:40,040
Speaker 1: that Verizon like I'm killing it. He's like, no, no, no, no, no,

1263
01:02:40,600 --> 01:02:44,040
Speaker 1: you're selling yourself short. Do you see this stuff? You

1264
01:02:44,200 --> 01:02:46,760
Speaker 1: have to put this out. He's like, you have to

1265
01:02:46,800 --> 01:02:48,640
Speaker 1: put this out. His name is William and he goes,

1266
01:02:49,360 --> 01:02:52,080
Speaker 1: if you don't put your words out, you're doing yourself

1267
01:02:52,120 --> 01:02:57,280
Speaker 1: in the world a disservice. Wow, what a compliment. Yeah,

1268
01:02:57,400 --> 01:02:59,280
Speaker 1: he told me that. He told me that we were

1269
01:02:59,280 --> 01:03:02,280
Speaker 1: sitting in my part in a carol Stream, Illinois, and

1270
01:03:02,320 --> 01:03:04,560
Speaker 1: when he told me that, he said. Another thing he

1271
01:03:04,560 --> 01:03:07,320
Speaker 1: said to me that night was he said, he said,

1272
01:03:07,360 --> 01:03:11,760
Speaker 1: all your life, you've given a hundred to your high school,

1273
01:03:12,320 --> 01:03:16,360
Speaker 1: to Northern Illinois, to football, to Verizon. He goes, You've

1274
01:03:16,400 --> 01:03:19,760
Speaker 1: never given that much to yourself, though, and he says,

1275
01:03:19,840 --> 01:03:21,800
Speaker 1: what would happen if you just committed to yourself the

1276
01:03:21,840 --> 01:03:25,400
Speaker 1: way you commit to everybody else's ideas and everybody else's things.

1277
01:03:25,440 --> 01:03:28,280
Speaker 1: What would happen if you just committed to yourself? And

1278
01:03:28,320 --> 01:03:30,760
Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't know. He's like, I think you

1279
01:03:30,800 --> 01:03:32,560
Speaker 1: need to quit your job and you need to commit

1280
01:03:32,560 --> 01:03:35,720
Speaker 1: to yourself. And here I am, I'm like, quit my job?

1281
01:03:35,840 --> 01:03:37,960
Speaker 1: What are you talking about, dude, I was just a cook.

1282
01:03:38,480 --> 01:03:41,800
Speaker 1: They're they're paying me, you know, thirty thousand salary plus commission.

1283
01:03:42,200 --> 01:03:45,440
Speaker 1: You want me to quit on that, know myself? And

1284
01:03:45,480 --> 01:03:48,160
Speaker 1: he goes yes, he says, this is incredible. You need

1285
01:03:48,160 --> 01:03:52,520
Speaker 1: to put these books out immediately. And when he said that,

1286
01:03:52,520 --> 01:03:54,960
Speaker 1: that night he left and he left, I said in

1287
01:03:55,040 --> 01:03:57,960
Speaker 1: my computer and I just cried. I just cried. I

1288
01:03:58,000 --> 01:04:00,400
Speaker 1: just had I was just like overwhelmed with emotion. One

1289
01:04:00,480 --> 01:04:03,800
Speaker 1: because he never he never was that expressive. He's not

1290
01:04:03,840 --> 01:04:06,680
Speaker 1: a very expressive person. So for him to be that

1291
01:04:06,760 --> 01:04:10,200
Speaker 1: passionate about something and like again, to see my life

1292
01:04:10,200 --> 01:04:12,320
Speaker 1: before I saw it, I just was like, man like,

1293
01:04:12,360 --> 01:04:16,600
Speaker 1: it was just overwhelming. And it took me about a

1294
01:04:16,680 --> 01:04:18,760
Speaker 1: year and a half. But here's what I did. I

1295
01:04:18,880 --> 01:04:22,520
Speaker 1: used my job because I knew. I told Jeremy. I

1296
01:04:22,560 --> 01:04:25,000
Speaker 1: went to I went to Jeremy, my manager, and I said, hey, man,

1297
01:04:25,400 --> 01:04:28,320
Speaker 1: I think I'm gonna quit to become an author. And

1298
01:04:28,360 --> 01:04:32,200
Speaker 1: he goes, okay, that's cool, but I have some advice

1299
01:04:32,240 --> 01:04:36,080
Speaker 1: for you, and I said okay. He says, I don't

1300
01:04:36,120 --> 01:04:39,120
Speaker 1: want to discourage you because I know what you're capable of,

1301
01:04:39,360 --> 01:04:43,000
Speaker 1: but being an author might not work. So what you

1302
01:04:43,040 --> 01:04:46,280
Speaker 1: should do is you're killing it as seals your top

1303
01:04:46,280 --> 01:04:49,000
Speaker 1: one percent as a sales rep. You need to become

1304
01:04:49,000 --> 01:04:52,240
Speaker 1: a manager. You need to have manager on your resume

1305
01:04:52,360 --> 01:04:55,160
Speaker 1: so you can prove that you can duplicate this success

1306
01:04:55,240 --> 01:04:57,960
Speaker 1: as a manager. Because what happens if you go into

1307
01:04:58,000 --> 01:04:59,760
Speaker 1: your book stuff for a couple of years it doesn't

1308
01:04:59,760 --> 01:05:01,840
Speaker 1: work out. Well, now you're gonna come back and you're

1309
01:05:01,840 --> 01:05:04,080
Speaker 1: gonna be in your thirties and you don't want to

1310
01:05:04,080 --> 01:05:05,960
Speaker 1: start over the entry level. You will it would be

1311
01:05:05,960 --> 01:05:07,600
Speaker 1: better for you to be a manager because you might

1312
01:05:07,640 --> 01:05:10,600
Speaker 1: have kids by then. And like Jeremy, he just had

1313
01:05:10,600 --> 01:05:13,960
Speaker 1: this incredible foresight, and I'm like, I'm like, yeah, you know,

1314
01:05:14,760 --> 01:05:17,000
Speaker 1: you're right. I'm not gonna I'm not gonna quit because

1315
01:05:17,000 --> 01:05:20,280
Speaker 1: I was already mentally checked out. So I re engaged,

1316
01:05:20,440 --> 01:05:23,840
Speaker 1: recommitted to the job. And now my whole focus was

1317
01:05:24,360 --> 01:05:27,400
Speaker 1: I'm gonna move to l A. I'm gonna uh go

1318
01:05:27,480 --> 01:05:29,680
Speaker 1: out there, you know, be a writer out there, and

1319
01:05:29,680 --> 01:05:33,600
Speaker 1: I'm gonna transfer my job to Los Angeles. Uh. So

1320
01:05:33,640 --> 01:05:35,760
Speaker 1: I applied. I had I ended up having and it

1321
01:05:35,800 --> 01:05:38,920
Speaker 1: wasn't just l A. I just wanted somewhere warm, because

1322
01:05:39,600 --> 01:05:44,160
Speaker 1: the apocalyptic Winter of eleven destroyed my energy. We hit

1323
01:05:44,160 --> 01:05:49,120
Speaker 1: a blizzard out there, yeah, and it was it was awful.

1324
01:05:49,200 --> 01:05:51,720
Speaker 1: So once that happened, I'm like, I need somewhere warm.

1325
01:05:51,760 --> 01:05:54,520
Speaker 1: So I ended up having an interview in Fort Myers,

1326
01:05:54,560 --> 01:05:58,160
Speaker 1: I believe it was Florida. I think it was like Bakersfield, California,

1327
01:05:58,200 --> 01:06:01,880
Speaker 1: which is nowhere near l A. And then uh, Phoenix, Arizona.

1328
01:06:01,920 --> 01:06:03,960
Speaker 1: So I did a couple of the interviews I got

1329
01:06:03,960 --> 01:06:06,320
Speaker 1: offered on all of them. I talked to one in Phoenix,

1330
01:06:06,400 --> 01:06:08,160
Speaker 1: and I'm like, hey, that's a that's a city. I

1331
01:06:08,240 --> 01:06:10,800
Speaker 1: like cities right now. So I took the one in Phoenix,

1332
01:06:10,880 --> 01:06:13,600
Speaker 1: and that's how I got here to Phoenix. End up

1333
01:06:13,920 --> 01:06:15,920
Speaker 1: doing the job for another year and a half. By

1334
01:06:15,920 --> 01:06:17,840
Speaker 1: that final year and a half, I had my first

1335
01:06:17,880 --> 01:06:21,480
Speaker 1: book out. It was getting sales um and I quit

1336
01:06:21,600 --> 01:06:24,200
Speaker 1: my job and it was I was I was waiting

1337
01:06:24,240 --> 01:06:28,640
Speaker 1: ready to go all in. That was two thousand. That's

1338
01:06:28,680 --> 01:06:31,120
Speaker 1: so cool. And one of the things I love about

1339
01:06:31,760 --> 01:06:34,320
Speaker 1: your story, and I think it's got to be so

1340
01:06:34,360 --> 01:06:37,320
Speaker 1: good for people at home who are listening, is that

1341
01:06:37,760 --> 01:06:40,400
Speaker 1: you never gave up on the dream, but you also

1342
01:06:41,200 --> 01:06:45,760
Speaker 1: went about achieving it in ways that were practical and

1343
01:06:45,800 --> 01:06:48,320
Speaker 1: that had application to your life and that would take

1344
01:06:48,400 --> 01:06:51,320
Speaker 1: care of you. You know. I think that sometimes the

1345
01:06:51,360 --> 01:06:54,280
Speaker 1: internet makes it look like everyone's an overnight success story

1346
01:06:54,840 --> 01:06:56,480
Speaker 1: and like you can just go out there and be

1347
01:06:56,560 --> 01:06:59,880
Speaker 1: reckless and it'll work. And none of it works like that,

1348
01:07:00,840 --> 01:07:05,600
Speaker 1: And I think it's amazing to think about how you

1349
01:07:05,680 --> 01:07:09,360
Speaker 1: can work towards something that is your life's dream while

1350
01:07:09,400 --> 01:07:14,840
Speaker 1: you're also protecting your actual life. Agree with you, you know.

1351
01:07:14,880 --> 01:07:17,439
Speaker 1: I always see the advice from entrepreneurs online and they're

1352
01:07:17,440 --> 01:07:19,440
Speaker 1: just like, oh, just quit your job and you know,

1353
01:07:19,560 --> 01:07:23,480
Speaker 1: become a multimillionaire by just only using your phone. Look,

1354
01:07:23,520 --> 01:07:27,680
Speaker 1: I mean maybe that happened for you, but not most

1355
01:07:27,720 --> 01:07:30,000
Speaker 1: of us is not going to happen that way. So

1356
01:07:30,360 --> 01:07:33,160
Speaker 1: to me, quitting your job is because I don't believe

1357
01:07:33,200 --> 01:07:36,560
Speaker 1: you should create out of desperation. When you're creating out

1358
01:07:36,560 --> 01:07:39,280
Speaker 1: of desperation, it's just like, what are you creating? What

1359
01:07:39,440 --> 01:07:42,840
Speaker 1: value are you actually creating? When you're under the mindset

1360
01:07:42,920 --> 01:07:44,800
Speaker 1: of I want to create a business or I want

1361
01:07:44,800 --> 01:07:48,040
Speaker 1: to create a product, you have to get into to me,

1362
01:07:48,320 --> 01:07:50,840
Speaker 1: you have to get into the mindset of how is

1363
01:07:50,880 --> 01:07:53,520
Speaker 1: this going to help my customer, What value am I

1364
01:07:53,640 --> 01:07:56,680
Speaker 1: offering them? What benefits are they getting? How are they

1365
01:07:56,680 --> 01:07:59,560
Speaker 1: going to get the best experience. So when you think

1366
01:07:59,600 --> 01:08:05,000
Speaker 1: about a customer, now your customer is your reader. So

1367
01:08:05,240 --> 01:08:08,000
Speaker 1: through your writing and all of your speaking, because as

1368
01:08:08,040 --> 01:08:10,360
Speaker 1: you mentioned, you know, you travel around, you speak, you

1369
01:08:10,400 --> 01:08:13,720
Speaker 1: do these incredible engagements all over the place. What do

1370
01:08:13,800 --> 01:08:16,320
Speaker 1: you hear from people? What do you hear from your

1371
01:08:16,360 --> 01:08:19,559
Speaker 1: readers and your listeners the most? Yeah, I mean the

1372
01:08:19,600 --> 01:08:21,920
Speaker 1: first I mean, first thing is just gratitude, Like people

1373
01:08:21,920 --> 01:08:25,799
Speaker 1: are just very grateful, you know that I've just followed

1374
01:08:25,800 --> 01:08:28,640
Speaker 1: my own path, you know, and then people get a

1375
01:08:28,640 --> 01:08:31,240
Speaker 1: lot of things, you know. I think I empower the

1376
01:08:31,280 --> 01:08:34,600
Speaker 1: creative person, you know, because I believe in art, and

1377
01:08:34,640 --> 01:08:36,960
Speaker 1: I believe in creativity, and I just believe that it's

1378
01:08:36,960 --> 01:08:39,280
Speaker 1: a path to happiness, even if we're not doing it

1379
01:08:39,320 --> 01:08:42,879
Speaker 1: as a job, but we're just expressing ourselves, whether it's dancing, singing,

1380
01:08:43,040 --> 01:08:46,320
Speaker 1: just playing, just being creative, painting things of that nature.

1381
01:08:46,800 --> 01:08:48,519
Speaker 1: I believe that that is one of the paths to

1382
01:08:48,560 --> 01:08:51,280
Speaker 1: healing and happiness. So I think that you know, you

1383
01:08:51,360 --> 01:08:54,760
Speaker 1: have that person who's just really empowered because through my work,

1384
01:08:54,760 --> 01:08:58,320
Speaker 1: they've been able to just uh, recaptivate parts of their

1385
01:08:58,400 --> 01:09:01,200
Speaker 1: childhood that they loved, even things like getting on a bike.

1386
01:09:01,600 --> 01:09:03,719
Speaker 1: You know, I had a podcast about getting on a bicycle,

1387
01:09:03,800 --> 01:09:05,920
Speaker 1: and someone sent me a message saying, Hey, I loved it.

1388
01:09:05,960 --> 01:09:07,960
Speaker 1: I'm on my bike again, all because of you. You know.

1389
01:09:08,040 --> 01:09:10,840
Speaker 1: It's like and then there's another part of my work

1390
01:09:10,840 --> 01:09:14,439
Speaker 1: where there's like a deep introspective part where it's focused

1391
01:09:14,479 --> 01:09:16,920
Speaker 1: on let me figure out what's going on inside of me,

1392
01:09:17,400 --> 01:09:20,599
Speaker 1: let me self heal or self navigate or self empower.

1393
01:09:21,200 --> 01:09:23,479
Speaker 1: And then there's another side of my work where, you know,

1394
01:09:23,560 --> 01:09:25,760
Speaker 1: like with my mom and my dad, where I try

1395
01:09:25,800 --> 01:09:29,040
Speaker 1: to look at situations and see where those pain points

1396
01:09:29,040 --> 01:09:33,200
Speaker 1: are or where where we can learn or shift while

1397
01:09:33,360 --> 01:09:36,519
Speaker 1: things are happening. And so I think that mostly people

1398
01:09:36,560 --> 01:09:38,320
Speaker 1: just have gratitude when they talk to me. They're just

1399
01:09:38,400 --> 01:09:41,040
Speaker 1: they're just grateful because I feel like my work kind

1400
01:09:41,040 --> 01:09:44,200
Speaker 1: of hit different different spaces depending on where you are.

1401
01:09:45,320 --> 01:09:50,879
Speaker 1: And I think especially getting comfortable talking about those pain points,

1402
01:09:50,920 --> 01:09:53,960
Speaker 1: talking about ways that we need to look inward at

1403
01:09:54,000 --> 01:09:58,040
Speaker 1: those things in order to metabolize them, in order to

1404
01:09:58,120 --> 01:10:01,080
Speaker 1: digest those experiences in or to get those things out

1405
01:10:01,120 --> 01:10:03,920
Speaker 1: of our bodies. I'm always so grateful to the men

1406
01:10:04,000 --> 01:10:06,640
Speaker 1: that I know who are willing to have these conversations

1407
01:10:06,680 --> 01:10:10,439
Speaker 1: in the way that you are, because men for so

1408
01:10:10,479 --> 01:10:13,679
Speaker 1: long have been cultured that they're only the only emotional

1409
01:10:13,760 --> 01:10:18,320
Speaker 1: outlet they have is anger. And in order to shift society,

1410
01:10:18,360 --> 01:10:20,920
Speaker 1: we have to shift how we deal with pains so

1411
01:10:20,960 --> 01:10:23,880
Speaker 1: that we put less anger out into the world. And

1412
01:10:23,920 --> 01:10:28,439
Speaker 1: I think that that's something that's really really profound, So

1413
01:10:28,560 --> 01:10:30,880
Speaker 1: thank you for that. I've experienced that. You know, you

1414
01:10:30,920 --> 01:10:32,600
Speaker 1: asked me what kind of some type of like the

1415
01:10:32,640 --> 01:10:35,639
Speaker 1: negative feedback I've got. Well, I've gotten that from different

1416
01:10:35,680 --> 01:10:38,000
Speaker 1: guys before, like, oh man, what type of you know?

1417
01:10:38,080 --> 01:10:40,680
Speaker 1: What is this? This is? You know? But the thing

1418
01:10:40,800 --> 01:10:44,400
Speaker 1: is is like if you knew, you know, I don't

1419
01:10:44,439 --> 01:10:46,640
Speaker 1: say this to them because I just don't respond to negativity.

1420
01:10:46,720 --> 01:10:49,479
Speaker 1: But I mean, if you do the whole story like one,

1421
01:10:49,520 --> 01:10:52,200
Speaker 1: I could fight. So it's like, you know, I can fight.

1422
01:10:52,280 --> 01:10:54,600
Speaker 1: I've done all the masculine stuff. I've played all the

1423
01:10:54,640 --> 01:10:57,920
Speaker 1: football games, like, I've lifted all the weights. I've been

1424
01:10:57,960 --> 01:11:00,200
Speaker 1: in weight room screaming with a bunch of guys, got

1425
01:11:00,280 --> 01:11:02,800
Speaker 1: been in country fields doing people stuff, people doing the

1426
01:11:02,880 --> 01:11:06,280
Speaker 1: country So it's like the stuff that we stereotypically think

1427
01:11:06,320 --> 01:11:09,160
Speaker 1: as masculine. I've done all of that. So you're not

1428
01:11:09,200 --> 01:11:12,160
Speaker 1: going to discredit something like my writing or my speaking

1429
01:11:12,200 --> 01:11:14,559
Speaker 1: because you think it's not it's not mainly enough. I don't.

1430
01:11:14,720 --> 01:11:17,200
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't agree with you guys, like you're

1431
01:11:17,320 --> 01:11:20,800
Speaker 1: you're wrong. You know. Oh, so you know you think

1432
01:11:20,840 --> 01:11:24,160
Speaker 1: that writing about an emotional thing or writing about emotions

1433
01:11:24,360 --> 01:11:26,800
Speaker 1: is weak or you think that's a feminine thing. I

1434
01:11:26,800 --> 01:11:30,360
Speaker 1: don't think so. You look at any any poet, you know,

1435
01:11:30,680 --> 01:11:33,000
Speaker 1: throughout the history of time, poets, poets have all been

1436
01:11:33,040 --> 01:11:35,280
Speaker 1: men for the most part, and it's all been men

1437
01:11:35,360 --> 01:11:38,240
Speaker 1: talking about you know, this love he has for his

1438
01:11:38,320 --> 01:11:40,439
Speaker 1: woman or a woman he wants to get where. They

1439
01:11:40,560 --> 01:11:43,360
Speaker 1: calling that, you know, soft and weak back then, I

1440
01:11:43,360 --> 01:11:45,680
Speaker 1: don't think so. I don't think so at all. So

1441
01:11:45,720 --> 01:11:48,280
Speaker 1: it's like I think because of my background of being

1442
01:11:48,320 --> 01:11:51,240
Speaker 1: an athlete and doing all those things that I just

1443
01:11:51,439 --> 01:11:54,360
Speaker 1: I don't allow the negativity to touch me whatsoever. I'll

1444
01:11:54,360 --> 01:11:56,679
Speaker 1: see it if it comes, and it doesn't come much anymore.

1445
01:11:57,080 --> 01:11:59,120
Speaker 1: But when I first started, it came there. Like all

1446
01:11:59,160 --> 01:12:01,360
Speaker 1: you need to be doing something tougher than this, like

1447
01:12:01,439 --> 01:12:04,160
Speaker 1: what working out. Everybody works out you can work out

1448
01:12:04,200 --> 01:12:06,240
Speaker 1: on the internet. That's what everybody's doing. I have something

1449
01:12:06,240 --> 01:12:11,120
Speaker 1: different to all, and I would argue even tougher. It's

1450
01:12:11,200 --> 01:12:15,280
Speaker 1: much harder to be with your feelings and learn to

1451
01:12:15,360 --> 01:12:18,320
Speaker 1: communicate them than it is to distract yourself by going

1452
01:12:18,360 --> 01:12:21,720
Speaker 1: on a run or lifting a heavy thing, you know.

1453
01:12:22,479 --> 01:12:25,000
Speaker 1: And I think that the truth of the matter is

1454
01:12:25,040 --> 01:12:27,680
Speaker 1: that we can all overthink things, you know, when we

1455
01:12:27,720 --> 01:12:31,920
Speaker 1: get into our feelings, when we're trying to navigate a situation,

1456
01:12:32,520 --> 01:12:34,800
Speaker 1: we can all get stuck on that inner hamster wheel.

1457
01:12:35,080 --> 01:12:38,559
Speaker 1: Are are there ways that you are there tools you've

1458
01:12:38,560 --> 01:12:43,120
Speaker 1: developed to stop doing that? And where did those Yeah?

1459
01:12:43,120 --> 01:12:46,719
Speaker 1: Where do those kinds of things stem from? Do you think? Yeah?

1460
01:12:46,760 --> 01:12:49,240
Speaker 1: I mean as a as an artist, and I think

1461
01:12:49,280 --> 01:12:51,000
Speaker 1: you probably can relate to this at different points in

1462
01:12:51,040 --> 01:12:53,559
Speaker 1: your story too. Is like, I feel like overthinking is

1463
01:12:53,560 --> 01:12:56,240
Speaker 1: something that all artists do at some point or another,

1464
01:12:56,880 --> 01:13:00,559
Speaker 1: and I think there is a path to get through that.

1465
01:13:00,800 --> 01:13:03,440
Speaker 1: So I've actually developed a course called how to Stop Overthinking,

1466
01:13:03,520 --> 01:13:05,519
Speaker 1: and it's something that I talk about in my book

1467
01:13:05,760 --> 01:13:08,639
Speaker 1: Free Your Energy. And with the Free your Energy thing,

1468
01:13:10,040 --> 01:13:11,880
Speaker 1: you know, it's really what you were just talking about,

1469
01:13:11,960 --> 01:13:14,559
Speaker 1: just allowing yourself to be free. You know, you can't

1470
01:13:14,600 --> 01:13:17,920
Speaker 1: create from a from a place where you're restricted. You know,

1471
01:13:17,960 --> 01:13:19,800
Speaker 1: Like you think about yoga for a second. When you

1472
01:13:19,840 --> 01:13:22,040
Speaker 1: do yoga, what's the point. The point of doing yoga

1473
01:13:22,120 --> 01:13:24,160
Speaker 1: is to breathe, to become one with your breath. Right,

1474
01:13:24,680 --> 01:13:27,559
Speaker 1: But we can attach different styles to yoga where you

1475
01:13:27,600 --> 01:13:31,479
Speaker 1: have uh, you know, different assignas that you have your

1476
01:13:31,520 --> 01:13:34,360
Speaker 1: different practices where you can hold like you have a

1477
01:13:34,439 --> 01:13:37,519
Speaker 1: yin yoga where you're holding it for five minutes. Like

1478
01:13:38,080 --> 01:13:41,000
Speaker 1: the point of doing that is to loosen up your body,

1479
01:13:41,120 --> 01:13:43,639
Speaker 1: to free your body, to free your spirit, to free

1480
01:13:43,640 --> 01:13:48,400
Speaker 1: your energy, to free yourself. Right, And when you're able

1481
01:13:48,520 --> 01:13:53,080
Speaker 1: to free yourself, there's no overthinking, right because when you're free,

1482
01:13:53,120 --> 01:13:57,640
Speaker 1: you have confidence, Like freedom gives you confidence. Part of

1483
01:13:57,800 --> 01:14:01,760
Speaker 1: overthinking is because of a lack of confidence, right, Like,

1484
01:14:01,800 --> 01:14:03,920
Speaker 1: I don't know what to choose. I'm not confident in

1485
01:14:03,960 --> 01:14:06,719
Speaker 1: either choice. Well, if you free yourself and you allow

1486
01:14:06,760 --> 01:14:09,479
Speaker 1: yourself to have just free thought and you allow your

1487
01:14:09,479 --> 01:14:12,960
Speaker 1: emotions to just flow freely, the answer will come to you.

1488
01:14:13,640 --> 01:14:17,519
Speaker 1: And even if you pick wrong, that's okay because who

1489
01:14:17,560 --> 01:14:21,000
Speaker 1: has who hits at a hundred percent in life? You know,

1490
01:14:21,080 --> 01:14:25,320
Speaker 1: nobody Michael Jordan wants six championships. Shooting from the field,

1491
01:14:25,320 --> 01:14:29,320
Speaker 1: he missed half the shots. So you know, you don't

1492
01:14:29,400 --> 01:14:32,280
Speaker 1: have to be right all the time. So my practice

1493
01:14:32,320 --> 01:14:35,120
Speaker 1: is I have a practice every morning. I'm more. I

1494
01:14:35,120 --> 01:14:37,640
Speaker 1: have a morning routine that I go through and it's

1495
01:14:37,680 --> 01:14:41,280
Speaker 1: about a two hour routine pretty much do the same stuff. Um.

1496
01:14:41,320 --> 01:14:45,160
Speaker 1: I have a hot, facetile wash. I wash my face

1497
01:14:45,280 --> 01:14:47,960
Speaker 1: every morning, every single morning. And when I do that,

1498
01:14:48,160 --> 01:14:54,040
Speaker 1: I say affirmations to myself. So this morning, this morning,

1499
01:14:54,040 --> 01:14:57,400
Speaker 1: my affirmations were give so Fia good stories, Give so

1500
01:14:57,479 --> 01:15:00,840
Speaker 1: Fia good stories. That was this morning. So it was me,

1501
01:15:01,200 --> 01:15:03,240
Speaker 1: you know, trying to predict what I wanted to do

1502
01:15:03,360 --> 01:15:05,400
Speaker 1: or like, you know, put myself into space where I

1503
01:15:05,439 --> 01:15:07,320
Speaker 1: could do what I need to do for you know,

1504
01:15:07,400 --> 01:15:09,920
Speaker 1: this moment where we're creating, you know. But it could

1505
01:15:09,960 --> 01:15:13,840
Speaker 1: be something that simple as simplify your life today or

1506
01:15:14,040 --> 01:15:17,000
Speaker 1: you know, just be good today. I always every single morning,

1507
01:15:17,040 --> 01:15:19,360
Speaker 1: I tell myself how I want to feel, you know.

1508
01:15:19,880 --> 01:15:22,439
Speaker 1: Um then from there I write our journal. I get

1509
01:15:22,439 --> 01:15:26,040
Speaker 1: out my journal and I just journal. Could be quick

1510
01:15:26,040 --> 01:15:28,559
Speaker 1: to do list, it could be a long thought, It

1511
01:15:28,560 --> 01:15:30,920
Speaker 1: could be emotions, It could be a poem, it could

1512
01:15:30,960 --> 01:15:32,559
Speaker 1: be a lyric. It is just whatever comes to me.

1513
01:15:32,600 --> 01:15:35,920
Speaker 1: I just jown a little bit, and then depending on

1514
01:15:35,960 --> 01:15:37,600
Speaker 1: the day, I may either go for a run, go

1515
01:15:37,720 --> 01:15:41,080
Speaker 1: for a row, walk, uh, stretch, just kind of wake

1516
01:15:41,160 --> 01:15:44,479
Speaker 1: my body up, take my multi vitamins. Literally, like every morning,

1517
01:15:44,560 --> 01:15:47,840
Speaker 1: I do the same thing to reboot you know, you

1518
01:15:47,880 --> 01:15:50,800
Speaker 1: know my system. And one of the things that I

1519
01:15:50,840 --> 01:15:54,200
Speaker 1: talked about in my course is the reason people overthink

1520
01:15:54,320 --> 01:15:57,519
Speaker 1: is because they're making too many decisions per day, because

1521
01:15:57,520 --> 01:16:00,559
Speaker 1: we have such thing as decision fatigue. So if you

1522
01:16:00,680 --> 01:16:03,920
Speaker 1: can cultivate part of your day to be automatic to

1523
01:16:04,000 --> 01:16:06,680
Speaker 1: where there is no thinking, to where there is no decisions,

1524
01:16:07,160 --> 01:16:12,080
Speaker 1: then your channel capacity for making decisions gets the you

1525
01:16:12,160 --> 01:16:14,840
Speaker 1: have a longer duration of it. See, I'm not making this.

1526
01:16:14,920 --> 01:16:16,360
Speaker 1: Let's say I get up at nine and less say

1527
01:16:16,360 --> 01:16:19,080
Speaker 1: I go to sleep at nine. Because of my morning routine,

1528
01:16:19,120 --> 01:16:22,040
Speaker 1: I'm not making decisions from nine to nine. I'm only

1529
01:16:22,080 --> 01:16:25,559
Speaker 1: making decisions from like one to nine because the majority

1530
01:16:25,560 --> 01:16:28,080
Speaker 1: of my day is set. Also, I mel prep so

1531
01:16:28,120 --> 01:16:30,280
Speaker 1: every single morning I eat the same thing. I just

1532
01:16:30,360 --> 01:16:32,840
Speaker 1: mail prep on Sunday, so my food is done so

1533
01:16:32,880 --> 01:16:35,519
Speaker 1: I don't have to think about what am I gonna eat. Also,

1534
01:16:35,800 --> 01:16:38,519
Speaker 1: what I do is I wear the same clothes. You know. Now,

1535
01:16:38,600 --> 01:16:40,280
Speaker 1: I have some stuff that you know, if if I'm

1536
01:16:40,280 --> 01:16:42,240
Speaker 1: going out or something, you know, you know, we got

1537
01:16:42,240 --> 01:16:44,360
Speaker 1: those clothes. But for the most part, I wear a

1538
01:16:44,400 --> 01:16:47,080
Speaker 1: black T shirt. If I'm doing something where you know,

1539
01:16:47,080 --> 01:16:49,800
Speaker 1: I have a meeting, I wear a collar. But I

1540
01:16:49,840 --> 01:16:52,240
Speaker 1: pretty much wear the same thing. So the first four

1541
01:16:52,280 --> 01:16:55,439
Speaker 1: hours of my day, there's no thinking. It's it's routine,

1542
01:16:55,760 --> 01:16:58,000
Speaker 1: and it's a routine that allows me to heal and

1543
01:16:58,000 --> 01:17:00,400
Speaker 1: to cultivate my power. As soon as I wake up,

1544
01:17:00,560 --> 01:17:02,320
Speaker 1: I don't touch my phone. I don't I don't do

1545
01:17:02,400 --> 01:17:05,040
Speaker 1: social media. Like if you look, my social media post

1546
01:17:05,120 --> 01:17:07,200
Speaker 1: go up at six in the morning. But I have

1547
01:17:07,320 --> 01:17:10,600
Speaker 1: a scheduler. So what I do is I load my

1548
01:17:10,680 --> 01:17:13,320
Speaker 1: social media post the night before and then it posts

1549
01:17:13,360 --> 01:17:15,720
Speaker 1: in the morning, so I'm not on social media when

1550
01:17:15,720 --> 01:17:17,320
Speaker 1: I wake up, I don't see my phone till one

1551
01:17:17,320 --> 01:17:22,479
Speaker 1: o'clock in the afternoon. Wow, that's incredible. These feel like

1552
01:17:22,600 --> 01:17:28,200
Speaker 1: such major steps, honestly, to even more than just taking

1553
01:17:28,240 --> 01:17:32,000
Speaker 1: care of ourselves to love ourselves better. I really really

1554
01:17:32,040 --> 01:17:36,080
Speaker 1: like that. How do you think because you talk about

1555
01:17:36,080 --> 01:17:38,320
Speaker 1: your journaling practice, and this is something that's been coming

1556
01:17:38,400 --> 01:17:41,559
Speaker 1: up a lot in conversation recently. I think so many

1557
01:17:41,600 --> 01:17:43,679
Speaker 1: of us are doing a lot of reflection right now,

1558
01:17:44,280 --> 01:17:47,040
Speaker 1: and I know that myself included. There's so many people

1559
01:17:47,080 --> 01:17:53,120
Speaker 1: who want to start a journaling practice. It is there

1560
01:17:53,200 --> 01:17:57,320
Speaker 1: a kind of jumping off point that you recommend to people, yes,

1561
01:17:57,360 --> 01:17:59,519
Speaker 1: for sure, who want to do that. So the very

1562
01:17:59,520 --> 01:18:01,639
Speaker 1: first thing is you have to steal a journal from

1563
01:18:01,640 --> 01:18:06,760
Speaker 1: seven eleven. Okay, that's that's first and foremost. Okay, if

1564
01:18:06,800 --> 01:18:09,120
Speaker 1: you don't steal the journal, you don't really want it. Okay, No,

1565
01:18:09,280 --> 01:18:15,240
Speaker 1: please don't steal. Please. That was just my childhood thing. Yeah, sarcasm,

1566
01:18:15,320 --> 01:18:18,120
Speaker 1: Please don't steal. That was a joke. Look, I think

1567
01:18:18,600 --> 01:18:21,000
Speaker 1: you gotta go into it freely. I think if you

1568
01:18:21,080 --> 01:18:24,639
Speaker 1: go into it saying I'm going to control what it's

1569
01:18:24,640 --> 01:18:28,080
Speaker 1: gonna be, I think you don't allow yourself to be free.

1570
01:18:28,960 --> 01:18:30,240
Speaker 1: You know, if you look at some of my old

1571
01:18:30,360 --> 01:18:32,639
Speaker 1: journals when I was playing football, I would be drawing

1572
01:18:32,640 --> 01:18:36,200
Speaker 1: football plays. I would be drawing like star Trak stuff

1573
01:18:37,120 --> 01:18:39,599
Speaker 1: writing and then would just all be in this journal.

1574
01:18:39,680 --> 01:18:42,479
Speaker 1: And that's how your mind is, that's how your emotions are.

1575
01:18:42,520 --> 01:18:45,720
Speaker 1: Everything is flowing. Right. I saw a paper the other

1576
01:18:45,800 --> 01:18:48,160
Speaker 1: day was saying that it was saying that on average,

1577
01:18:48,400 --> 01:18:50,559
Speaker 1: what was it saying. It was saying that we have

1578
01:18:50,600 --> 01:18:53,599
Speaker 1: anywhere from like sixty five thou and eighty thousand thoughts today.

1579
01:18:54,560 --> 01:18:57,599
Speaker 1: So if that's true, you know, you can't go into

1580
01:18:57,640 --> 01:18:59,280
Speaker 1: it saying, hey, I'm going to control what I'm gonna

1581
01:18:59,280 --> 01:19:02,080
Speaker 1: write down. Have to just let it flow. You know,

1582
01:19:02,160 --> 01:19:05,240
Speaker 1: your moods, your emotions, you just let it flow. You know,

1583
01:19:05,280 --> 01:19:08,040
Speaker 1: if I if I wrote right now, I'm happy, I'm

1584
01:19:08,040 --> 01:19:11,200
Speaker 1: not I'm not hungry, I'm not hot, like my emotions.

1585
01:19:11,640 --> 01:19:15,040
Speaker 1: Where I feel right now is a very high vibrational

1586
01:19:15,160 --> 01:19:17,599
Speaker 1: you know, talking with you, we're talking about creativity and

1587
01:19:17,800 --> 01:19:19,960
Speaker 1: we're just diving into so many things. So I'm feeling

1588
01:19:20,000 --> 01:19:22,559
Speaker 1: really good right now. So if I journal, it would

1589
01:19:22,600 --> 01:19:26,240
Speaker 1: be a very positive, like uplifting thing. But if I

1590
01:19:26,360 --> 01:19:28,760
Speaker 1: journal the first thing in the morning, maybe before I

1591
01:19:28,800 --> 01:19:30,960
Speaker 1: brush my teeth, before I washed my face, you know,

1592
01:19:31,439 --> 01:19:33,479
Speaker 1: it might not be that good. You know, it might

1593
01:19:33,520 --> 01:19:37,360
Speaker 1: be something, it might be different, but they're both okay,

1594
01:19:37,400 --> 01:19:40,160
Speaker 1: They're both acceptable. So if you're looking to get into

1595
01:19:40,200 --> 01:19:42,479
Speaker 1: a journal practice, just go into it with the mindset

1596
01:19:42,520 --> 01:19:46,800
Speaker 1: of the purpose of me journaling is for my own freedom.

1597
01:19:46,840 --> 01:19:50,599
Speaker 1: It's not for any desired outcome. And then the last

1598
01:19:50,600 --> 01:19:55,240
Speaker 1: thing is, don't have an expectation of the length. One

1599
01:19:55,320 --> 01:19:58,360
Speaker 1: sentence might be all you do. Hell, there's been times

1600
01:19:58,360 --> 01:20:00,639
Speaker 1: in my journal where I have just written one word.

1601
01:20:01,360 --> 01:20:03,719
Speaker 1: So it may be one word, It maybe one sentence.

1602
01:20:03,720 --> 01:20:05,840
Speaker 1: It may flow in it. You may have this long

1603
01:20:06,400 --> 01:20:10,519
Speaker 1: poem like the Odyssey. Don't have any expectation on the outcome.

1604
01:20:11,960 --> 01:20:14,120
Speaker 1: I love that the purpose of my journaling is for

1605
01:20:14,240 --> 01:20:18,920
Speaker 1: my own freedom. Mm hmm. Is there. I have two

1606
01:20:18,920 --> 01:20:21,600
Speaker 1: more questions for you, and thank you so much for

1607
01:20:21,640 --> 01:20:27,080
Speaker 1: your time. Is there a piece of writing, a phrase

1608
01:20:27,400 --> 01:20:30,880
Speaker 1: or a little paragraph or something just based on to

1609
01:20:30,960 --> 01:20:33,280
Speaker 1: your point this kind of energetic space that we have

1610
01:20:33,320 --> 01:20:35,400
Speaker 1: found ourselves in that you want to share with people

1611
01:20:35,439 --> 01:20:39,639
Speaker 1: at home listening. Yeah, I got my care packaged book.

1612
01:20:39,880 --> 01:20:44,160
Speaker 1: This is been um, my best selling book has been

1613
01:20:44,160 --> 01:20:47,960
Speaker 1: my care packaged book. People really, they really love this book.

1614
01:20:48,840 --> 01:20:52,519
Speaker 1: So on page two thirty four, there's this quote that

1615
01:20:52,560 --> 01:20:55,880
Speaker 1: says a lot can happen in a year, and it's

1616
01:20:57,520 --> 01:21:01,400
Speaker 1: it's when I remember writing, and it's as a lot

1617
01:21:01,439 --> 01:21:05,360
Speaker 1: can happen in a year. People die, You outgrow old

1618
01:21:05,439 --> 01:21:11,400
Speaker 1: friends and get tired of mundane jobs, new careers, calm,

1619
01:21:11,640 --> 01:21:15,559
Speaker 1: new friends, find your soul. But no matter what you grow,

1620
01:21:16,720 --> 01:21:20,360
Speaker 1: you lose your mind a little bit. Most importantly, you

1621
01:21:20,360 --> 01:21:23,760
Speaker 1: get a little wiser. Your circle gets smaller because you

1622
01:21:23,800 --> 01:21:27,559
Speaker 1: get stricter with your energy and time. And if you're

1623
01:21:27,560 --> 01:21:32,600
Speaker 1: really lucky, you'll find love inside of yourself, inside of

1624
01:21:32,640 --> 01:21:36,679
Speaker 1: friends and family, and just maybe the universe will bless

1625
01:21:36,720 --> 01:21:39,519
Speaker 1: you with the lover who laughs at your lame jokes.

1626
01:21:41,640 --> 01:21:43,639
Speaker 1: And yeah, that's one of my favorite ones. A lot

1627
01:21:43,680 --> 01:21:49,320
Speaker 1: can happen in a year. Mm hmm, that feels very

1628
01:21:49,360 --> 01:21:54,200
Speaker 1: aproposed right now. Okay, my friend, My favorite thing to

1629
01:21:54,240 --> 01:21:57,519
Speaker 1: ask everyone who comes on this podcast because it is

1630
01:21:57,560 --> 01:22:00,360
Speaker 1: called work in progress and I'm curious when you here

1631
01:22:01,360 --> 01:22:05,400
Speaker 1: the phrase, whether it's something personal or professional, what feels

1632
01:22:05,439 --> 01:22:07,320
Speaker 1: like a work in progress in your life right now?

1633
01:22:08,439 --> 01:22:14,400
Speaker 1: May I give both? Yes? Please, let's go with professional

1634
01:22:14,439 --> 01:22:17,320
Speaker 1: first and then I can end on personal. So professional,

1635
01:22:18,400 --> 01:22:21,679
Speaker 1: this year has been so you go from a space

1636
01:22:21,720 --> 01:22:24,680
Speaker 1: where you know you're working at your corporation and you're

1637
01:22:24,720 --> 01:22:28,040
Speaker 1: moving into entrepreneurship. You've been in entrepreneurship for seven eight years.

1638
01:22:28,840 --> 01:22:31,280
Speaker 1: What happens is you do you end up doing too much?

1639
01:22:31,400 --> 01:22:35,200
Speaker 1: You end up overworking, end up working fifty sixty hours,

1640
01:22:35,240 --> 01:22:41,639
Speaker 1: you end up not having balance. And it's a good thing,

1641
01:22:41,680 --> 01:22:44,120
Speaker 1: and I believe in duality. It's a good thing because

1642
01:22:44,680 --> 01:22:49,880
Speaker 1: there's a reward for committing yourself to that type of

1643
01:22:49,880 --> 01:22:54,720
Speaker 1: work that often to that frequency. But it's not a

1644
01:22:54,720 --> 01:22:56,280
Speaker 1: good thing because, like I said, you don't have the

1645
01:22:56,320 --> 01:22:59,160
Speaker 1: balance right. And so this year, coming into this year,

1646
01:22:59,240 --> 01:23:01,879
Speaker 1: my whole goal was to teach myself how to balance.

1647
01:23:02,960 --> 01:23:05,920
Speaker 1: So I was able to hire new people, so you know,

1648
01:23:06,000 --> 01:23:09,240
Speaker 1: hire new employees, expand my team. I was able to

1649
01:23:09,280 --> 01:23:11,320
Speaker 1: get some of the things off my plate that I'm

1650
01:23:11,439 --> 01:23:13,880
Speaker 1: not good at, like email and things like that. I'm

1651
01:23:13,920 --> 01:23:17,080
Speaker 1: not good at email and responding. I'm really not good

1652
01:23:17,080 --> 01:23:20,360
Speaker 1: at that. Like my bread and butter is creating. You know,

1653
01:23:20,640 --> 01:23:23,960
Speaker 1: I gotta spend my time creating. And what was happening

1654
01:23:24,000 --> 01:23:26,000
Speaker 1: is my business was growing so much that I was

1655
01:23:26,080 --> 01:23:28,320
Speaker 1: spending time. There will be day, there will be weeks

1656
01:23:28,360 --> 01:23:30,760
Speaker 1: where I wasn't writing at all because all I'm doing

1657
01:23:30,880 --> 01:23:33,840
Speaker 1: is just you know, editing videos or doing emails, setting

1658
01:23:33,880 --> 01:23:39,040
Speaker 1: up podcasts, traveling. Like Lebron James says it best, you

1659
01:23:39,120 --> 01:23:42,040
Speaker 1: gotta keep the main thing, the main thing the main

1660
01:23:42,080 --> 01:23:44,479
Speaker 1: thing for me is writing books. So I had to

1661
01:23:44,560 --> 01:23:47,519
Speaker 1: kind of reverse engineer, you know, my how it was

1662
01:23:47,560 --> 01:23:49,720
Speaker 1: set up so I could get some balance in my

1663
01:23:49,760 --> 01:23:51,760
Speaker 1: life because I believe in balance. I believe in it.

1664
01:23:51,800 --> 01:23:54,240
Speaker 1: You know even our body, and our body is called homeostasis.

1665
01:23:54,360 --> 01:23:58,280
Speaker 1: You know, our body is consistently looking for balance. So

1666
01:23:58,800 --> 01:24:03,000
Speaker 1: Corona actually help me with that balance, because Corona has

1667
01:24:03,000 --> 01:24:05,920
Speaker 1: actually taken some things off of my plate from a

1668
01:24:05,920 --> 01:24:08,639
Speaker 1: business perspective that I didn't have, that I probably wouldn't

1669
01:24:08,680 --> 01:24:13,280
Speaker 1: have done myself, and it's helped me get a new balance.

1670
01:24:13,479 --> 01:24:16,559
Speaker 1: So when when when we go to quote unquote normal,

1671
01:24:17,360 --> 01:24:19,280
Speaker 1: there are certain things that I'm going to have to

1672
01:24:19,320 --> 01:24:21,200
Speaker 1: have a healthy boundary with and say no, like I

1673
01:24:21,240 --> 01:24:24,519
Speaker 1: can't do this because it's going to disrupt my balance

1674
01:24:25,000 --> 01:24:29,599
Speaker 1: that I've learned through the coronavirus. So I'm very very

1675
01:24:29,640 --> 01:24:32,960
Speaker 1: grateful for where I am personally, like pre professionally, I

1676
01:24:32,960 --> 01:24:35,920
Speaker 1: should say, because I finally have balance, I'm able to

1677
01:24:35,920 --> 01:24:39,080
Speaker 1: work work hard, work smart, and working smart is more

1678
01:24:39,120 --> 01:24:41,599
Speaker 1: important than working hard. That's what I've realized. It's so

1679
01:24:41,680 --> 01:24:44,000
Speaker 1: much more important to work smart. And I finally realized

1680
01:24:44,000 --> 01:24:45,880
Speaker 1: that I need to work smart and not hard. I

1681
01:24:45,920 --> 01:24:48,160
Speaker 1: needed to work hard at different times in my life.

1682
01:24:48,560 --> 01:24:50,280
Speaker 1: But moving forward, I want to work smart, I want

1683
01:24:50,320 --> 01:24:53,400
Speaker 1: to work efficient. I want to make sure I have routine.

1684
01:24:53,439 --> 01:24:56,479
Speaker 1: I want to make sure I'm optimizing my time. And

1685
01:24:56,520 --> 01:25:00,200
Speaker 1: then also I need my personal time. The reason don't

1686
01:25:00,200 --> 01:25:02,680
Speaker 1: need my personal time and the reason I'm working progress

1687
01:25:02,720 --> 01:25:05,720
Speaker 1: in the personal spaces because I'm a new father. Al Right.

1688
01:25:05,760 --> 01:25:09,320
Speaker 1: So my son his name is Mason, and being a

1689
01:25:09,400 --> 01:25:11,719
Speaker 1: father is something that I don't know what I'm doing.

1690
01:25:11,840 --> 01:25:15,320
Speaker 1: I have no clue whatsoever. So it's a completely new

1691
01:25:15,360 --> 01:25:18,479
Speaker 1: space where every day I'm learning and I'm trying to

1692
01:25:18,479 --> 01:25:20,559
Speaker 1: figure out. Like I made him cry the other day

1693
01:25:20,600 --> 01:25:23,760
Speaker 1: because I was mocking him. He was like screaming, you know,

1694
01:25:23,800 --> 01:25:25,519
Speaker 1: he was like yeah, yeah, yeah, So I like I

1695
01:25:25,560 --> 01:25:28,120
Speaker 1: tried to do it back to him, like yeah, and

1696
01:25:28,160 --> 01:25:31,160
Speaker 1: he started crying. And so I felt so bad because

1697
01:25:31,200 --> 01:25:32,640
Speaker 1: I felt like I made him cry. And then like

1698
01:25:32,680 --> 01:25:35,400
Speaker 1: I apologize to him and I'm like, hey, man, I'm sorry,

1699
01:25:35,400 --> 01:25:37,280
Speaker 1: I was just mocking you. I thought it was fun,

1700
01:25:37,920 --> 01:25:40,400
Speaker 1: you know, And then he started laughing at me, and

1701
01:25:40,439 --> 01:25:43,519
Speaker 1: I'm like, you know, he forgave me. So being a

1702
01:25:43,600 --> 01:25:45,720
Speaker 1: father is something where it's like I don't know what

1703
01:25:45,760 --> 01:25:47,880
Speaker 1: I'm doing, you know, and so I'm trying to figure

1704
01:25:47,920 --> 01:25:50,599
Speaker 1: it out. I'm trying to help the mother because she's

1705
01:25:50,640 --> 01:25:54,040
Speaker 1: amazing and she she's doing everything to make sure he survives.

1706
01:25:54,840 --> 01:25:58,560
Speaker 1: And uh, it's just it's it's a crazy experience to

1707
01:25:58,640 --> 01:26:01,720
Speaker 1: go from like not like like even a year ago,

1708
01:26:01,800 --> 01:26:03,519
Speaker 1: like like the quote says, like a year ago, I

1709
01:26:03,560 --> 01:26:05,320
Speaker 1: didn't have a kid. Now I have a kid, and

1710
01:26:05,400 --> 01:26:08,160
Speaker 1: it's like your mind just shifts like a new space.

1711
01:26:08,720 --> 01:26:10,280
Speaker 1: You know. We're like four or four in the morning. Yes,

1712
01:26:10,320 --> 01:26:11,920
Speaker 1: So I woke up because I heard him scream in

1713
01:26:11,920 --> 01:26:14,240
Speaker 1: the middle of the night. So I woke up, and

1714
01:26:14,240 --> 01:26:17,040
Speaker 1: I'm like investigating, like I'm thinking somebody's in the house,

1715
01:26:17,080 --> 01:26:20,479
Speaker 1: somebody's kidnapping him. But he was just hungry, you know.

1716
01:26:20,720 --> 01:26:24,400
Speaker 1: So you know, yeah, I'm just suggesting to being a

1717
01:26:24,439 --> 01:26:28,439
Speaker 1: new father. And that is another reason why I wanted

1718
01:26:28,479 --> 01:26:31,200
Speaker 1: to balance, you know, I didn't want to be someone

1719
01:26:31,320 --> 01:26:35,559
Speaker 1: who it's overworking when you know, I got a kid

1720
01:26:35,560 --> 01:26:38,280
Speaker 1: at home. Because fatherhood is very important to me. That's

1721
01:26:38,280 --> 01:26:40,400
Speaker 1: one of the things that I want to do great

1722
01:26:40,439 --> 01:26:42,679
Speaker 1: at you know, I want my next book to do great.

1723
01:26:43,200 --> 01:26:45,200
Speaker 1: I want my fatherhood to be great. You know, I

1724
01:26:45,240 --> 01:26:46,920
Speaker 1: want my course to do great. I want my life

1725
01:26:46,920 --> 01:26:48,840
Speaker 1: to be great. I want I want to just have

1726
01:26:48,920 --> 01:26:53,000
Speaker 1: complete abundance and all pillars of my life, you know,

1727
01:26:53,040 --> 01:26:54,719
Speaker 1: and I need that balance to do that. I can't

1728
01:26:54,800 --> 01:26:57,679
Speaker 1: I can't be over balanced. I gotta make sure everything

1729
01:26:57,760 --> 01:27:02,400
Speaker 1: is getting enough of me that's inspiring. That's certainly something

1730
01:27:02,439 --> 01:27:07,520
Speaker 1: I know I'm working on is figuring out how to

1731
01:27:07,560 --> 01:27:11,400
Speaker 1: reduce a little bit so that it's only the really,

1732
01:27:11,439 --> 01:27:15,320
Speaker 1: really good stuff that remains. You know, it's hard, man,

1733
01:27:15,320 --> 01:27:19,680
Speaker 1: It's hard, especially when you when what you do impact

1734
01:27:19,880 --> 01:27:23,800
Speaker 1: so many other people. Then it's like, well, man, if

1735
01:27:23,800 --> 01:27:25,840
Speaker 1: I get rid of this, well, now this person is

1736
01:27:25,880 --> 01:27:28,439
Speaker 1: not gonna eat or they're not gonna make the money

1737
01:27:28,439 --> 01:27:30,880
Speaker 1: that they're making off of me. It's like that's the

1738
01:27:30,920 --> 01:27:33,599
Speaker 1: hard thing is when you're when you kind of become

1739
01:27:33,640 --> 01:27:36,080
Speaker 1: like a little quote unquote empire and you have people

1740
01:27:36,120 --> 01:27:40,840
Speaker 1: who are depending on your success, it's hard to think of, oh,

1741
01:27:40,880 --> 01:27:43,120
Speaker 1: well I don't need to grow. Especially we both work

1742
01:27:43,160 --> 01:27:45,320
Speaker 1: in business where they say you need growth, you need

1743
01:27:45,360 --> 01:27:47,840
Speaker 1: new customers, you need to keep expanding. Well, it's like,

1744
01:27:47,880 --> 01:27:51,000
Speaker 1: well do I really? It's like, it's it's tough. It's

1745
01:27:51,040 --> 01:27:54,000
Speaker 1: a tough thing to figure out, But onward Do we Go?

1746
01:27:55,920 --> 01:28:01,880
Speaker 1: Where we Go? This show is executive produced by Me,

1747
01:28:02,160 --> 01:28:07,160
Speaker 1: Sophia Bush and sim Sarna. Our supervising producer is Alison Bresnick.

1748
01:28:07,400 --> 01:28:11,680
Speaker 1: Our associate producer is Kate Linley. Our editor is Josh Wendish,

1749
01:28:12,040 --> 01:28:14,519
Speaker 1: and our music was written by Jack Garrett and produced

1750
01:28:14,520 --> 01:28:17,120
Speaker 1: by Mark Foster. This show is brought to you by

1751
01:28:17,120 --> 01:28:18,080
Speaker 1: a Brilliant Anatomy